#but i cant finish anything on a deadline otherwise

[aroacee-of-spades]

adhd is funny bc i have been 15 crying bc i couldnt focus my attention for more than 10 minutes and now nearly a decade has past and im still doing the exact same thing

[purplepixel]

Oh believe me, I am LOADS better on not beating myself up on this. (Me in college vs me today is like night and day) I know this song and dance and have found a way to play along. It is still frustrating to deal with, but I'm thankful I at least have come up with coping mechanisms that occasionally work. But when those strategies don't work and I need to get stuff done, it's like yikes. Can we please not, brain? 🙏 I promise you that doing the thing alleviates the inner turmoil instead of avoiding or shutting down. Pinky promise.

Still tho, I do occasionally need the reminder, despite believing I'm self aware on this. So thank you, curly! Hoping you can overcome your procrastination! I'm very much a firm believer that everyone procrastinates for a reason and it's your body's way of telling you something. In my current situation, I know I'm procrastinating bc I'm overwhelmed by the amount of work I think I need to do in a short time frame. And I know that I'm gonna have to use more braincells to trouble shoot the thing I'm currently working on. I know that what I'm doing is gonna take HOURS. So I recognize that me procrastinating is actually me trying to process all this in order to actually be able to do the thing.

The funniest thing is that this isn't work or school. This is from my backlog of projects with self imposed deadlines I made in order to force me to actually finish. Which is sometimes needed otherwise I'd never finish anything. "I've worked on this long enough, I want to finish" and "I really want to start THAT, but i cant bc I should prob finish THIS" I still do not know the healthy balance on this one.

But an update to this situation! I've made progress in the thing I've been working on so yay. Two hours in and I'll probably continue tonight until I get through the hardest part.

The level of procrastination I've been suffering today ;-; (yes this post is also part of that)

I need to find a youtube video to animate to, but first, lets learn how to plant garlic

How would I watercolor on my ipad? Lets' watch this video

Ok so I still need to find a youtube video to put on. Lets watch this one about the data breach. Man why are people freaking out over the wrong story?

Scrolls through tumblr

Hmmm should tmnp!karai be a pokemon? Will prob throw this idea out but its worth thinking about

Well its lunch time now, I should probably eat before I start

I should light a candle to help me start (doesn't light a candle)

OMFG THE SONIC X SHADOW GENERATIONS ANIMATION IS 3D ANIMATION??? *watches video disecting it*

I am so making this pumpkin gnocchi this month

My coffee is cold, I shall turn it in to iced coffee

Wait I really need to sketch out this TMNP thing. Ok hold on, lets draw a little more to turn it into a mini comic.

Ok but I need to actually hydrate so sparkling water time

OK NOW PUT ON LONG YOUTUBE VIDEO TO WORK ON. But first, lets see whos streaming on twitch (puts on stream to have in the background)

I've finally opened toon boom harmony

Finds 2 hr video but watches 8 mins without drawing

WAIT LIAM DIED. *begins reading multiple articles*

*looks outside* The weather is not right. I can't possibly draw in these conditions. Lets open my window to let a little light in

OK ILL ACTUALLY LIGHT THIS CANDLE I SWEAR. Trims wicks but still hasn't light it

This is insanity. Makes this post

WAIT HOW IS IT ALREADY 4PM. OK FOR REAL ILL START WORKING ;-; (will prob not start)

[bansheeoftheforest]

Us telling each other to go to sleep while simultaneously not sleeping

-

1) You can just stop writing the au if you hate it so much, or just take a hiatus. I know people like it but you shouldn't burn yourself out!

2) Have you ever heard of the Lykoi cat? Please search them up if you haven't

3) Diphylleia Grayi, is a type of flower that looks turns "invisible" when it touches water

4) Do you have a favorite spider?

5) Help I keep drawing porcelain Jekylls that I'll never post </3 /lh

6) hsjsvdjsgh I cant think of anything. Uhhh. The Wulver is a scottish creature that's a furry person with the head of a wolf and shares fish with locals. Honestly most drawings look like furries I've just noticed, why is no one drawing em with proper clothes

7) Similar questions to my last(?) ask. Do you have any thoughts on what supernatural/mythical creatures tgs characters would be if they were one? And what would your latest oc that I keep forgetting how to spell the name of be?

...The fact that that is accurate scares me-- I'm also going to save that meme for future references everytime either of us catch the other up late sdfds

1) THEORETICALLY YES... But I know that if I take a hiatus I will never finish it, and I know how guilty I would feel for not continuing it... Plus, most of my complaining is just dramatic but I'm not used to make chaptered fics and never will ever again. I guess it's just a mix between constantly having to worry about how the fic is perceived (especially since we are entering the more controversial/angsty chapters rn) combined with the deadline that makes... Me sad :'3

2) *frantic googling* OH MY GOD THEY LOOk LIKE THE DEFINITON OF A TRASH GOBLIN I WANT FIVE OF THEM IMMEDIATELY SFSDFSDF

3) oo h h m y god... It looks like ice... Are they edible? My brain is telling me to go absolutely bonkers on them. O o h h m y god

4) I had a very weird phase as a kid, who was also very afraid of spiders, where I tried to convince my parents to give me a tarantula because I saw that they were fluffy. I'm still massively afraid of spiders but otherwise I'd say redkneed birdspider (is that the english name???)

5) Bestie I know how it feels my entire sketch book is just drawings of my ocs that will never grace tumblr </3

6) Oh man. I love Wulvers. I know jack shit about them but I had planned to have Henry meet a wulver in the Irrbloos Au at some point, since they were benevolent and helpful I had planned to have a wulver lead him back and get him back to the real world at some point but I never got so far into that plotline. But honestly... All pictures of werewolves of all kinds look like furries. Did you know that they have werehyenas in africa, which is basically just reverse werewolves (i.e a hyena that turns into a human instead of the other way around)?

7) I'm going to start off by saying that Cederic definitely would be some kind of nymph-like creature like an incubus of some kind or just a straight up male nymph/siren, something very pretty and very seductive because, I don't know if anyone read his part of the updated OC masterlist post, he was originally a prostitute and very much uses that to his advantage to get what he wants. Something cat-like would also make sense, as his mother (in the actual DND campaign) is the egyptian cat goddess Bastet, but regardless, he still has his cat so it would fit no matter.

*cracks knuckles* alright here we go. Not going to go into a lot of context i'm just going to spew shit out.

Jekyll - Werewolf, really, that's no surprise but a werewolf fits so good. Having a monstrous side he tries to hide that only comes out at night? *chef's kiss*

Hyde - Imp or poltergeist.

Robert - Vampire.

Rachel - Selkie

Jasper - since he already is a werewolf, he would just be Some Dude

Frankenstein - Dwarf, or Baba Yaga.

Griffin - Ghost that does not want to be a ghost

Emma - A Huldra, maybe? A benevolent nymph? A banshee? I just love her and I wanted to add her to the list somehow.

Maijabi - a ghost who is totally chill with being dead. Maybe one of those spirits who like to fuck with humans (metaphorically speaking) by hailing cabs and then ditching them in the middle of the ride.

Lavender/Ito - those centaurs that are deer instead of horses I forgot the name sdsdfs

thats all i can come up w at the moment sdfsdf

[deadwriter16]

send me fic requests!!

preferably bkdk :)

hey! if you want me to write a fic for you i will, but there are specifics so i'm making this post to explain them. if you want me to write a fic for you (please send requests i love writing) here are the specifics!

first, please remember that I'm a minor! please keep requests sfw

i write everything for FREE, but that means i have more reign over what i will and won't write, time constraints, deadlines, etc.

I'm currently writing for bnha. i write for multiple ships, but mostly bkdk. i'd prefer requests for bkdk simply because i have the most motivation to write for them and i really want to be able to write for you if you ask! todobaku and kacchako are also okay. however, if i can't write anything for any reason, i will refuse and most likely tell you why unless i'm not comfortable explaining.

anything i write will be in between 1-5k unless you request something shorter or i end up writing something longer. please don't ask for a specific word count, otherwise the fic won't turn out good.

I post everything i write on AO3, and if you have an AO3 i can gift the fic to you on there, or just link your tumblr in the notes. if you're anonymous then i'll just post it on AO3 and say that it was written for someone else. i will also link the fic in a tumblr post when i finish. i can't guarantee a specific date for when i'll finish your fic, but i will try and give you a general range (1-2 weeks, a month, etc).

I'm in school and busy! please don't ask me to write your fic faster or to hurry up, please just remember that i am doing my best!!

things i don't write:

nsfw/smut (also a/b/o, adult/minor, incest, mpreg)

anything i don't ship (this includes platonic relationships)

x reader

anything where the characters aren't fully human unless it's one of those quirk accident fics

anything anti-bakugou

villain deku (i only write this in very specific circumstances that i cant really make a list for so just dont request this pls)

anything that makes me uncomfortable. please respect that

things i DO write:

BKDK (i love them so much)

almost any background ships you want! (will explain if i don't want to write the ship you suggest)

gen fics or something with just platonic relationships

anything with angst/darker themes that i am okay with

fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, crack, a mix of all of them

sad endings (but the fic will be closer to 1-2k words)

AUs, future fics, canon divergence, and canon compliant

manga spoilers/fics based on the manga

on a funnier note please keep in mind that i am the living worst at kiss scenes so dont expect any fancy stuff from me thanks

anyway, i love writing fic and i love bnha, so please send me fic requests!!

[shakshuka-grandpasweaters]

Hey I cant really get to the rules and guidelines for the fandom exchange thingie, it only leads me to your front page? Sorry for bothering, maybe it's just my phone being a dick dhdhd

Hello, yeah, you can’t reach the pages on the app (yay to the tumbls mobile app)

I’ll copy them for you here:

Rules

No RPF, no incest, no noncon. Otherwise no content restrictions, but I highly encourage you to make sure your giftee will be okay with receiving whatever you want to make.

All in all, please try to be respectful with your content!

There is no age requirement for this event, but you must be 18 or older to receive or create NSFW content.

Please keep your identity secret from your giftee until your assigned posting day!

After assignments are made, you must make (anonymous) contact with your giftee at least once within a week. This is to ensure everyone knows what they’re doing. After a week, if you haven’t heard from your gifter, please let me know so I can resolve the issue.

Please respond to my check-in message within 48 hours, and message me after you have posted your gift so I can confirm your completion of the challenge.

Your tumblr inbox must be open with anonymous messages enabled. This is so your gifter can make contact with you, and also so that I can get in touch with you should any problems arise.

Signing up means you are committed to submitting a gift on time, so please plan accordingly! The goal is to make sure that everyone who participates will get something. If at any point you have doubts about being able to finish or need to drop out, please contact me as soon as possible so I have time to resolve the issue.

Guidelines

General guidelines

Assignments will go out via tumblr ask. You will get info of your giftee such as their ships, likes, and dislikes in this ask so you have an idea of what to make them.

Please make contact with your giftee at least once within a week after assignments go out!

You then have 6 weeks to create content. Feel free to message your giftee anonymously during this time, and contact me with any questions or concerns.

I’ll be sending out check-ins to check on people’s progress. Please plan to respond to these within 48 hours of them coming out!

I will then send out your posting day. If you have any concerns about making this deadline, please get in touch with me! The sooner, the better.

Posting week; identities revealed! Be sure to thank your gifter for their hard work!

At the end of the week, I will be releasing a masterlist of all the gifts created and their gifters/giftees. If at this point you still have not received your gift, please contact me. By the end of this everyone should have received something!

Content Guidelines

Fic – No word count restriction. Can be multichaptered, but must be complete and posted in its entirety by posting day. Betas are highly encouraged. Please make sure your work is polished!

Art - Should be a complete piece with linework, not a sketch.

Gifsets - 8 gif minimum, should tie together somehow.

Edits - needs to be unique and different to just a recolored screenshot.

Fanmixes - 8 song minimum, should have a cover and a theme. The cover doesn’t have to be anything too fancy (a screencap with text will suffice) but please don’t use another person’s art/edit without their permission.

Fanvids - should be at least 1 minute long.

Posting Guidelines

Please plan to post on tumblr using the tag #druck fandom gift exchange [in the first five tags so it’ll show up!] and mention your giftee so they can see it.

If you are posting a fic on AO3, please use the tag Druck fandom gift exchange, gift the work to your giftee on AO3 if they have one, and make a post on tumblr so that we can reblog it.  

After you have posted your gift, please contact me so I can confirm that you have completed the challenge.

All gifts will be reblogged to my tumblr for everyone to see!

[buttsonthebeach]

Overwhelmed

EVERYONE! I had the distinct pleasure of writing a full scene commission for @lauren-draws-things/@lauren-draws-xxx based off of one of her very NSFW and very amazing drawings! (The link might not work - Tumblr is giving me a hard time, of course)

Thank you for letting me write Lenneth, and I am so pleased that you think I did her justice <3

My Ko-Fi || My Commissions (Slots for February coming SOON!)

Pairing: Solas x Lenneth Lavellan

Rating: EXPLICIT. Content warnings for double penetration, dom/sub dynamics, and inappropriate uses of magic.

**********

Solas was always entirely too controlled, in Lenneth’s humble opinion. He didn’t misplace a single spell or word. He considered each bite of his food, each sip of his drink. He was mild-mannered to the rudest of nobles, quiet in noisy arguments. Of course, she did have to admit that that made it extra fun to rile him up. To be the only one who saw another side of him. To creep up behind him as he stood in front of his desk in the rotunda, wrap her arms around his waist, nuzzle into the space between his shoulder blades, feel him relax into her touch – and then to stand on tiptoe and place a wet, smacking, sucking kiss on the soft skin where his neck met his shoulder. “Lenneth!” He was trying to be scolding, but there wasn’t much use in trying to be scolding when one had just yelped like a dog. “You’ve been at this for far too long. Those oculara skulls won’t get any deader, you know. They will still be here in the morning. Come to bed, vhenan.” She wrapped her arms around him again and cuddled into the crook of his neck. He smelled like ink and lyrium and his own skin and it was perfect, and she wanted to drown herself in that scent. There was already a prickle of heat between her legs, and she would stoke it to a flame before the night was done.

“I am close to done.” He said, gently extricating himself from her grasp, giving her a perfunctory kiss on the cheek. Lenneth looked him over from head to toe. “Really? You don’t even look like you’ve started.” She let her gaze linger on the part of his sweater that preserved his modesty in order to make her meaning clear. He rolled his eyes. “You are more clever than that.” “When I want to be, perhaps. Right now I just want to be underneath you. Or on top of you. Whichever you prefer, really.” She rocked up onto her toes and then back onto her heels, full of her own excitement, her affection for the stoic man before her. She would peel back every layer soon enough. “No,” Solas said breezily, walking around to the other side of his desk. With a lazy wave of his hand, he reignited a candle that had fizzled while they talked.

That gave Lenneth a thought. One that had more to do with said prickle of heat between her own legs, and less to do with actual candles.

“You know,” she said. “You could always try using your magic on me instead.”

The aura of her own magic heightened around her at the thought, as though prickling with a hundred needles. It was one of those things she’d always wondered about when she was younger, and coming into her power. Things were always complicated with other mages in her clan and outside of it. She hadn’t had a chance to try with anyone else.

And Solas - the creativity in his spells, the way he confounded Vivienne and Dorian and Bull with them, the way he always seemed to be holding back some of his power - he was the perfect person to try with.

It helped that he was also handsome, and charming, that he loved her, and that she loved him, of course.

It also helped that goading him into giving it a try would be the most fun Lenneth had had in a long time, and the gods knew she needed the fun after the tension and horror of Halamshiral and Adamant.

She sent one long lick of her mana towards Solas and used it to trace the curve of his ear. She could feel the lightness that always filled her body when she stood halfway between both worlds - Fade and reality - and that only amplified that hunger growing within her. It did good things for Solas, too, from the vibration she felt in his aura at the touch of hers. The way he stood up straighter and breathed in through his nose was a good indication, too. A grin broke across her face.

“I have no idea what you are implying,” Solas said mildly.

“Come on,” she pleaded, following him, draping herself around him, nuzzling against his back and running her hands down his sides, perilously close to the fronts of his thighs. “I know how much you love to show off.”

“Lenneth, I promised this report to your council by the time you have your morning meeting.”

Solas’s tone was exasperated but he did not draw away from her. She knew how much he craved touch, how under that confident, austere veneer he was desperate for it, so desperate he could not even admit it fully, and had to show it in the way he would inevitably take control from her so he could have exactly what he wanted, needed, and from the way he seemed to hate every inch of space between them once they were alone, and bare.

Lenneth liked the role she played in that dance. She liked teasing, teasing, prodding, until she reached the soft, vulnerable center of him, and he had to react. She knew he liked it too. He didn’t know how to let it out otherwise.

“Well, that’s the marvelous thing about being in charge,” she said. “I hereby push your deadline to the afternoon meeting instead.” She traced a line down the front of his left leg with just one finger. He shivered but did not react otherwise.

Solas shook his head. “You know full well that the Seeker asked for the report. She wants to know how it intersects with what she learned from Lord Seeker Lucius. And she will not be present at the afternoon meeting.”

But he was starting to lean back into her now. Lenneth let her wandering finger wander inward, away from the warm muscle of his thigh towards the warmer, softer part of him that she most wanted to touch.

“I’m sure it wouldn’t be hard for you to amuse me for a little while, and then finish your report later,” she said as she cupped him and felt the beautiful weight of his sex in her hand.

Solas sucked in a breath.

“Lenneth,” he said. “We are in public.”

“And?” she said, cupping him closer, tighter, feeling him start to swell. “Am I not allowed to embrace my lover in public?”

“I believe that you are currently doing much more than embrace me,” he said, voice pitched low. It vibrated in his chest and she wondered if he could make his magic vibrate like that.

“Oh, my mistake then,” she said, withdrawing the touch, stepping back around to the other side of the desk, adding a twirl because she was alive and happy and she knew the dance between them had begun, and she was taking a night off from thinking about anything else. She retreated to the couch, feeling Solas’s eyes on her the whole while, knowing he was eyeing the sway of her ass as she walked.

“I have never known you to be so easily convinced,” Solas said.

“Disappointed?”

“In you? Never.”

It was such an unexpectedly sweet response. His smile was so genuine. Lenneth curled her toes with delight and then slouched down on the couch so she was reclined, and let her legs fall open, and Solas’s gaze was so heavy on the place between them that she could feel it, as real as if it was his hand.

“I must finish this,” he said.

“Would you really have me believe that you can’t finish me at the same time?”

She could see the delicate flaring of his nostrils, the flicker of his gaze from her casually spread legs to the report on his desk. He was weighing his obligations and the challenge she’d just thrown down for him. His parents, whoever they had been, had done well to name their son Pride.

Solas sat down at the desk and picked up his quill, as calm and poised as if their conversation had never happened. Lenneth deflated, dropping her head back against the sofa, and sighing theatrically. But Solas’s timing, as ever, was unerring. At the exact moment that she began to think she really had fallen in love with the most stubborn, unyielding man alive, she felt a row of wet kisses trickling down her neck. They were plush, warm, exquisitely placed. She would have sworn she felt Solas’s breath brushing across her skin with each one, that his weight was braced above her on the couch. But even as she let out a pleased hum and arched up, seeking more, she saw that he was still at the desk.

His left hand was busy with his quill, and his right hand was somewhere beneath the desk, on his knee, perhaps, and that was the trick. That was how he was doing this. He had so much power, so much control, that he could make her feel his presence with just a few subtle, out-of-sight gestures of his fingers.

Lenneth knew exactly what else he could do with a few subtle gestures of his fingers.

The ethereal kisses went lower, between her breasts, towards her navel. She whimpered, then slapped a hand over her mouth. It was late enough that the tower was mostly empty, but there was forever a spy in the rookery above, or one last scholar in the library scribbling notes, and she did have to be some sort of figure of authority at the end of the day.

“I cannot believe I ever found your focus indomitable,” Solas said, a chuckle warming the words.

He ended whatever sentence he was writing with a decisive stab of his quill onto the parchment. She could see the muscles in his right arm tense and before she could respond she felt a wash of sensation all over her body, a rain of a hundred kisses all over her skin, as if her clothes didn’t exist, as if nothing existed except his affection for her. He was kissing her breasts, her shoulders, her earlobes, her thighs, her ankles, the length of her spine. He was kissing her everywhere except her throbbing sex. She felt unbearably hot there, unbearably slick, unbearably swollen, already half undone, and she was still fully clothed, and he had not actually touched her once.

But Lenneth had some pride, too. She bit back the final mewling cry that threatened to spill from her when the rain of kisses faded, the last six or so being placed strategically around her lower belly and the tops of her legs, accompanied with a gentle nuzzling sensation. She propped herself up on her elbows and met Solas’s gaze.

“You know, I really thought your tricks would be more impressive. Is that all you can do?”

“Oh?” Solas said, returning to his writing, looking away from her. “I did not think I had to impress you. I thought I had already won you, my heart.”

And there, again, that disarming sweetness that made her want to melt into the floor, that made her breath catch in her throat. She felt a final ghostly kiss, this one on her forehead. She loved this side of him. But it wasn’t quite what she was after tonight. They could have all of that later. For now, she wanted him to transport her, to shed every pretense, to make her forget they were anything but animals.

“Didn’t you say something to me about Halamshiral? How no victory is permanent?” she replied, sitting up now - but keeping her legs spread wide, her feet planted firmly on the stone floor, and invitation and a challenge alike.

“Ah, so you do listen to my - what did you call them? My ramblings?” Solas continued writing, and now there were gentle fingers whispering up and down the outside of her legs, hands kneading the tension from her shoulders and running through her hair. Lenneth moaned in spite of herself, widened her legs further.

“Occasionally. And if I didn’t?” She did not bother to hide the breathlessness in her voice, even if she did not yet beg for him to stop teasing and fuck her already.

“That would be your choice. But I do so enjoy talking to you. You have the loveliest voice, you know.”

And that was when his magic placed a sloppy, open-mouthed, hungry kiss right on her cunt.

Lenneth arched, keened, scrabbled for purchase on the sofa, tried to press forward into a touch that wasn’t there. Other sensations joined that of his mouth - she felt hands spreading her legs, pushing them onto the sofa, felt the bulk of his shoulders, and even if she stared at the empty air in front of her, even if she stared at Solas, whose eyes were lowered demurely to the report, she could not convince herself that the feelings were anything less than utterly real.

“Oh, please, oh, more, yes, more -” she cut off her own babbling, felt her face go flame red, rode against the shape of his jaw and the press of his tongue. Her clit twitched, grew, ached for more.

“More of what?” Solas said. “I thought my talents were not impressive.”

That was, of course (of course) when two fingers slid inside of her, when he sealed his lips around her aching clit and sucked, when she had to bite down on her wrist, and even then her desperate whimpers still echoed off of the stone walls, and even then the ravens in the rookery rustled and clucked.

He kept working her. Lenneth’s smallclothes clung to her body, each stroke of his fingers and his tongue bringing a fresh wave of slick welling up from within her, and she was pulsing with her own need, writhing against the couch, shuddering every time he fluttered his tongue around her clit and calmly continued writing. The space between them was an ocean now, a gap so vast it took her breath away.

“Please, please - I want you and this, you and this, you and this.” She babbled her own refrain, not even really sure of her own meaning, just knowing that she needed all of him, every last scrap of Solas she could have, that she needed to be totally and utterly overwhelmed.

She opened her eyes. Solas had stopped writing. He was staring at her, hard, the muscles in his jaw working, like he really was there between her legs, eating her like she was his last meal. They locked eyes. He guided her closer, closer, closer to that precipice, she felt all the pleasure gather in one place, felt it about to explode outwards, felt a scream building in her throat - and then all the sensations stopped. She hovered, locked, at that precipice, panting, her throat raw.

“Upstairs,” Solas said, that one word a command. Then, smiling slyly: “If you can stand.”

Between the two of them and their ability to warp the Veil around themselves for speed and silence and cover, they made it up to her bedroom relatively unnoticed. Lenneth started shucking off her clothes on the stairs. She wasn’t sure who reached for who first - if it was Solas who clutched at her, or she who clutched at him, but before they ever reached the bed they were wrapped up in each other, clawing, biting, kissing. There was no magic now, other than the magic of their own connection, of how they bent and swayed together.

“More,” Lenneth said, reaching between them, cupping and grasping him, already ramrod straight and painfully hard in her hand. Solas made a muffled, gutted sound against her throat, where he was leaving sucking kisses behind. His hips rocked forward and so did hers.

“Bed,” Solas said.

And like that, Lenneth knew she had him. He had gone from his usual eloquence to single words, to ripping the hem of his tunic as he drew it over his head, to dropping his jawbone necklace with a clatter against the stone floor instead of setting it gently aside - he had gone from carefully controlled forays with his magic to a crackling power that seethed around him as he followed her onto the bed, crawling over her, his eyes all hunger and his hands all need.

“More,” she begged again. “More, vhenan, please, more -”

She was still soaked from their earlier play, and that had to be the only reason it didn't hurt when Solas drove himself into her, filling her up. She looked down the length of their bodies to watch his cock pumping in and out of her, the steady, driving rhythm of his need, the way her body parted for his, the shine of her slick on his rosy, rigid flesh.

“More,” she whined again. “I can't ever have enough of you, give me more.”

“Patience.” Single words again, this one little more than a growl.

“No.” Lenneth nipped at his chin, his throat, the corner of his mouth, squeezed herself around him.

And like that, she was on her stomach, and he was hauling her hips back, keeping her legs spread, pressing down between her shoulder blades, spreading her with two fingers. She ached with her own emptiness, leaned towards him, utterly wanton now.

“I am going to fill you with my magic,” Solas said. She could not see his face but she could hear his harsh breathing. “Will that satisfy you at last?” He stroked the length of her spine. It was a soothing, gently touch that made her skin prickle.

“No,” Lenneth said. “I want you, too. I want you everywhere.”

Solas's hand paused in its journey on her back. Lenneth turned her head so she could see him. His blue eyes gone black with desire, the flush on his high, sharp cheekbones, the angle of his jaw, his parted lips.

“I do,” she said, raw in her own need, her own vulnerability. She was spread before him, needing him, opened up to the most primal parts of her self. Nothing else mattered but this. She had wanted that tonight. After everything she had given for others. She just wanted this and all it meant.

Solas slid two fingers into her, curled them down, and her belly hollowed out with pleasure. He pressed on that rough spot within in her over and over again.

“I want all of you, too,” he said. “Will you give me that?”

“Of course,” she said. A wave of pleasures rippled through her, made her wetter, made Solas groan, finger her harder. “Please, gods, Solas - fuck me.”

Solas pulled her up by her waist - their bodies were flush together - he turned, they stumbled a bit, they ended up against the headboard of the bed, Lenneth spread wide between his legs. Another moment of fumbling, hands and legs - a lifting - and he was inside her again, but still this time. It was his mana that was stirring, rising, thickening from the ethereality of the Fade into something she could truly feel. Something pressing against her opening, close against Solas's length, rubbing shyly, teasingly, not quite breaching her.

A shiver ran through Lenneth's whole body.

“Oh, please, please, please -”

“You beg so prettily,” Solas said. She could feel his grin against her cheek.

The magic pressed inward by the smallest margin, stretching and burning her. She was full of Solas's body and she would have his magic now too, the essence of him, every ounce of him. She thought of him coming like this, filling her up the way she liked best, how he would groan and shudder behind her. Her cunt clenched. The magic slid in further. It was heavy, thick, blunt, pulsing with energy. Solas muffled a sound into her shoulder. Lenneth squeezed around him again, whined high and loud at the fullness, the vibration coming off the magic, the flex of Solas's own flesh within her.

“Wicked thing,” Solas murmured, rocking his hips, easing the magic in further.

“More, more, more,” Lenneth begged, and probably more besides that. She was not really in the business of paying much attention to what she was saying at the moment. All of her focus was reserved for swiveling and grinding her hips against that all consuming pressure within her.

“Needy thing,” he murmured.

And then he thrust hard, up into her, and she was so full she could not breathe or speak at all.

She burned, she ached, she felt herself on the verge of coming, her core so hot and so wet and so built up that surely all that pleasure would spill over soon. Solas seemed to sense that. He withdrew.

“No - no no no, please, vhenan, I need you, I need you to fuck me, right now, please, fuck me -”

She was being loud (as usual) and she did not care (as usual). Solas chuckled. The sound reverberated between their sweat-slick bodies. Lenneth looked down between them, caught a glimpse of the swollen red head of him, leaking clear fluid, the way his cock twitched and bobbed and the way he held back his own need.

“Noisy thing, too,” he said. “Perhaps I shall find a way to silence you. Would you like that, my heart? To be so full of me you cannot even speak?”

“Yes, please, yes -”

“Then have -” he paused, inched himself in, nestled his head into her folds. “Patience.”

Then Lenneth watched as the magic swelled beside him, a pale, shimmering phallus that found its own way into her body. They slid in together. She tried to watch but her eyes rolled back and it was good, so good, so overwhelming in the best way, there was nothing but sensation, pressure, friction, closeness. Her own magic hummed with the touch of his, the core of her connection to the Fade swelling at the same time as her clit, the walls of her cunt. She started up her sounds again, her noisy cries and moans and pleas. Solas worked her, held onto her hips to give himself stability, bounced her up and down and both the cocks filling her up. It was too much and not enough, when she came she would only get tighter and tighter, and she was going to come, her skin was all sparks and she was shouting now, feeling the wave building, her head tipped back -

And that, of course, was when her mouth was filled as well.

If she had not watched Solas’s own cock disappear inside her body, if she could not feel the slow, powerful pumping of his hips beneath hers, she would have sworn that that was what happened - that he had pushed himself into her mouth and was fucking her there, too. The cock that filled her mouth was smooth, thick, heavy, warm, as urgent in its movement as the two inside her sex were.

Lenneth only shouted all the louder. She was sweating. Solas was too. Beneath the sound of her own pleasure (trapped in her throat as it was) she could still hear him grunting his own joy. It was perfect. Perfect, perfect, perfect - the rough jostling of their bodies, the ecstasy of feeling him everywhere, of not being able to think of anything but how fucking good it all felt, how wet she was, how tight - tighter, tighter, tighter, she’d come so close the first two times, this time would she tip over the edge, would all that pleasure spill out in wave after wave, would that make Solas come too -

Solas nuzzled against her ear. He pinched her nipple. How did he still have a hand free? He went slower, harder with each thrust, and the sheer power, the power in him - he had such control over his magic and over himself -

“Do you think you will ever doubt me again?” he crooned.

The cock in her mouth slid further, teased the back of her throat. She tasted salt. She wanted it to spill all over her mouth. She wanted him to spill all over her belly. Her clit twitched, twitched, twitched. She wanted to come. She was babbling all of that but he couldn’t hear it, of course. Although - maybe he did, because he bit down on her shoulder and resumed one last driving rhythm, filled her, filled her, filled her, sent a spark of magic down to the place between her thighs and then -

And then her whole world was light, and sound, and pleasure.

She was coming, coming, coming, jerks and spasms, long keening cries, her whole body shaking, and she felt the ethereal shaft in her mouth jerk and spasm too, felt Solas’s whole body go tense - felt the magic dissipate, suddenly, half of the fullness leaving her body just as the last pulses wracked her - and then he pulled himself free from her body just in time to splash her with his spend, groaning and shaking all the while behind her, and he had been full, too - he went on and on, rope after rope, until he too was weak with the force of his pleasure.

Lenneth lay back against him, trembling. Solas barely held her up. He was panting. Lenneth was sore, and exhausted - and alive, so alive, and in love, so in love. She did not ever want to move or think again.

“Are you well?” Solas asked some time later. Lenneth wondered if she had dozed off and worried him. But, then again, he was like that - solicitous, caring, aware of her needs, perhaps even to the detriment of his own.

“I am perfect,” she said. He hummed and kissed her shoulder in response.

“Shall I clean you off?”

“After you worked so hard to make a mess of me?”

He laughed. She burrowed against him, determined not to let him move her off of him. She could not see his face this way, but she could feel every part of him - could feel him softening against her thigh, could feel the rhythm of his heart - and that mattered far more.

“Oh, Lenneth,” he said, absently. Maybe he was falling asleep, too.

“Are you well?” she asked, no mockery in her repetition of his question.

Solas was quiet a moment before answering. She wondered if it disconcerted him when she pushed him to lose control, or even if it just drained him. She waited for his answer, attentive.

“I am more than well,” he said. “As always, vhenan, you - transport me.”

She wondered what he meant by that. It was an odd choice of words. A careful one.

“I hope I transport you somewhere good,” she said. “Especially when we play like this.”

This time she had to turn around to see his face, to be sure. She flopped over inelegantly, so that she was still lying on top of him, but face to face this time. He was more flushed than she expected, but his face had a dreamy relaxation.

Solas cupped her face in both his hands, like she was something precious.

“Always,” he said, kissing each of her cheeks. “Except, perhaps, when you refuse to clean up, and then roll over on top of me, and make a mess of me too.”

Lenneth laughed, and that made her more sore, but once again it was the best kind of soreness - the kind that came from connection, from happiness. From feelings that overwhelmed.

[japandiary]

5 random facts

hey! it’s been a while since i’ve blogged. 久しぶりですね。

if you’ve come here from my instagram, hello! you may have just finished my 5 random facts on my stories. as promised, here are 5 more random facts that i’m able to go in depth with since this platform allows me a little more room.

here goes:

1. i’m hypersensitive to caffeine. i didnt even realize it until i graduated college. i used to order venti iced coffees and even sometimes drink two redbulls a day during high school and college. once i cut so much caffeine (particularly coffee) from my routine, i realized a drop in my anxiety levels. caffeine definitely boosted my “good student” tendencies because deadlines always pushed me to try hard, while chugging a hazelnut latte at the same time. i still drink coffee (especially tea), but i carefully limit myself so that i’m not up all night with my mind running.

click below to read more

(photo credit)

2. “spiritual” topics interest me. i’m not a religious person and i am a bit of a skeptic when it comes to supernatural, paranormal, or extraterrestrial things, but when it comes to the idea of lucid dreaming, astral projection, and meditation, i’ll give it a good listen. the best example would be anything mind and body related, much like anything mentioned in avatar: the last airbender and the legend of korra, since i love both of those series so much.

(photo credit)

3. i’m afraid of bugs & afraid of heights. for as long as i could remember, i did not treat bugs like they were apart of my everyday life. every time i spotted a bug near me, a tiny part of me inside would freak out. once i moved to japan, i realized that i was afraid of bugs because my body is extremely allergic to any type of bug bite. i get high irritation and bruising after every bite. since my body is naturally high in temperature, it seems to attract more mosquitoes than the average person. i’ve gotten bad bug bites since i was little whenever i visited other places other than my hometown. so my fear for bugs stems from my fear of getting bit and having an allergic reaction. i was oblivious to this reasoning because i spent a majority of my life in las vegas, where there arent very many mosquitoes. in terms of heights, i really dont know why i’m afraid. i can fly on a plane, climb a ladder, but i cant do rock climbing. i guess you can say i’m really afraid of falling. when i went on a children’s rock climbing wall, i only went up halfway because i chickened out and was shaking with fear. one of my biggest fears is to die in a falling elevator shaft. still trying to find the origins of this fear of mine.

(photo credit)

4. i want to travel every continent. i strongly believe that my wanderlust and love for food is from watching the travel and food channel with my mom so much. while other kids changed the channels to cartoons, i grew up watching anthony bourdain, andrew zimmern, and alton brown. they taught me that open-mindedness for culture is key, food brings people together, and food preparation (manufacturing, cooking, decorating) is a long and hard-working process. i’m really happy that they influenced me to be the person that i am today, otherwise i wouldnt be here living in japan and setting goals to visit so many places i’ve never been to before.

(photo credit)

5. i’m really shy. when it comes to openly socializing and approaching others first, i’m extremely hesitant. since i moved schools often when i was younger, i was always faced with the inevitable fact that i had to try and make new friends. it was hard for me to keep friendships with kids my age growing up, but once i finally made longtime friends in high school, i really think they’ll be my friends for life! so once i make a friend, i’m very loyal to them. i’m still working over this anxiety that i feel when meeting new people.

bonus fact: 6. i love asmr & mukbangs. for some reason, i love watching people eat good food. sure, it makes me more hungry, but then it just gives me motivation to make a really good dinner later. i also love intricate sounds, so i especially like soap cutting videos along with mukbangs that feature crunchy foods. asmr “roleplay”s also help me fall asleep. it sounds really weird, but search it up and try it out!

those are my 5 random facts, in depth. thanks for reading! if you have any similar thoughts, please feel free to message me about it! ♡

[deeton]

vent

i swear i never do this. like not just on tumblr like in real life also literally last week i gently touched on the subject of my personal life matters to my proffesor and starting crying. i NEVER cry. why am i like this. anyways im gonna add one of these boys in cuz ig this is gonna be a long mf  post 

anyways i have no long term goals and i just dont,, fucking care,,, about school. but i love school so much. besides the schoolwork, obviously. but i love it here. i go to school in miami and im from michigan so like it’s actually fucking great. im finishing my sophmore year and writing this post instead of my essay that was due at 11:59 as it’s almost 5:30 am (oops forgot to hit send!) and i have another essay due i got an extention on thats in spanish and then i have my final spanish essay due tomorrow at 9 pm so im just not gonna sleep ig. i voluntarily do the wrong thing. like why . what the fuck. am i in control of my own control? im just so out of balance. and i just donntttt give a shit about anythingggg that i actually need to give a shit about. i wasnt always like this. i mean i use short term goals to get me by. make it to the next festival. make it to the next flight home to be w my parents whom i love dearly. but i dont feel a purpose for anything. i feel like i just want to make people happy and thats it. i just wanna make eveeryone happy. and theyre not. like my brother caused all this drama w my lesbian friends cuz theyre a couple and he deadass asked one of them to fuck behind the others back so now the other girl is salty and wont sell him wax and hes alwaaaaaaaaaays using wax all day every day and he doesnt get out much and his friends are shitty and hes so lonely and it’s so sad cuz hes actually really enjoyable to be around and idk whats goin on in his head. he doesnt believe in 12 steps. he may or may not have taken xans recently after all that work fighting a nasty battle with h for like a year at least. he told me he was thinkin of selling bars i said no dude. like you can just sell wax and not fuck up ppls lives and ik hell take it if he has it cuz thats what i would do. i just want him to have friends

anyways this is the end of my sophmore year of undergrad and it’s the first year where i actually made real live actual friends in mia who actually wanna hang out w me. im michigan i always had friends but each and every one of them is their special kind of wack and makes me sad sometimes but thats life ig???? or could it be better........................... oh except my family friends we’re all on some ride or die shit i love them. but i have friends kinda and it’s awesome but when im alone left w my own thought actively not writing essays i feel like such a piece of shit and im so full of hate. i constantly make hypothetical arguments with people im beefin with and i just make things seem os much worse in my head. i think i hold so much hate for so many people because im supplying it. i hate myself, and im spreading it onto actual stupid ppl who are stupid (thats not hate thats just fax) i dont wanna be gay. i hate myself for being gay. fuck counseling btw im not about that shit thats why im here lol. IDK my parents and family and friends love me for me but i just feel so guilty about it. i feel bad like all the time maybe thats why i look for an escape so much and look forward so heavily to music festivals. im literally awesome tho like im naturally the shit and am really cool and want to make ppl happy but i think i turn a blind eye to this negative side of myself. to be so full of hate it must be out in the open for people to see. i dont know what to do with it, where to put it, or how to destroy it. i just want to destroy myself instead, so instead of turning to drugs and alc, i turn to social media and not giving a shit about my future so that i can destroy my future self since i cant destroy the me who i am rn, otherwise id end up sent to rehab and super addicted to something. i wonder why i have 0 love life and i say im looking 4 love but where it @ tho. ppl just try and use me. and some people who are close to me turn out being weirdly jealous and start being mean and it fucking sucks. i need to meditate on it lol. this sucks, i cant wait to go home but i have to do the work first and i just dont. fucking. want to. 0 motivation. i can barely get out of bed in the morning and when i do thats just where i end up. i just keep telling myself nothing is real but it all is. i use to firmly be a solipsist and say nothing is real but human beings proved me wrong in good and bad ways. i could eat more than  i do i just havent been this last couple weeks bc deadlines mostly. fuck school but i love my school. it took me soooooo fucking long to find my people tho like wasted a year of my life so fuck that.

[pluralthey]

is it alright to ask questions abt the patreon rewards here? if so, when is the best time to approach you for a commission request when youre a 25$/15$ patron? and do commissions for the 25$ tier stack like they do in the 15$ tier, or do you keep it to "once per month" to keep a flood from coming in? also do saved points from the 15$ tier get saved if you upgrade or downgrade, or do you forfeit them if you change tiers?

1) the first week of the month is the best time. the second week is okay as well but anything after the second week is not guaranteed to be finished in the month because it throws a big wrench into my scheduling (it’ll still get done tho)2) yeah they stack. i ask for advance notice or deadline extensions for larger commissions like “heads up, i’m going to be asking you for a character ref next month” or “i have 12 months of points saved up so i get if you cant fit 12 months of work into this one month” etc, u know, just reasonable stuff. if somebody wants multiple things in a month i usually just work deadlines out with them3) saved points stay saved until otherwise stated even if said patron stops being a patron, i usually just give them my contact info outside of patreon if they lemme know they’re going to be dropping b/c they can’t message me on patreon anymore, so they definitely stay saved for just switching a tier

[insidiousflame]

Okay so, San messaged me after she saw my venting on instagram and was worried that it was because of her. But basically I just had an emotional breakdown last night while I was with chris because of how everything was getting to me again. The big thing that really got to me was that everyone was assuring me that these next couple months would be able to be so productive. That we would finally have time to film and get stuff out there. And what happened? A member went on hiatus, San is gone for a month as well, other members are not really communicating about coming to practice. And that leaves October to maybe have everyone together? But by that point our focus will be on KKP and crunching for that. And once again nothing gets done. Where are the vlogs from Momo and Metrocon? They were started but Mel still needs to get back to them. And by the time she feels like editing again, there’s more recent stuff she needs to work on and then she stops again and says shes burned out on editing. Like if you can't push yourself to finish a project hand it over to someone else otherwise don't do it. However it gets done there needs to be some sort of time-frame or deadline to push things to get finished and out there instead of waiting on motivation to strike. Especially when our success is based online and we need content to show not only fans but potential clients/venues to have us. The main thing I need to stress though, is I realize a lot of this is no one's fault. Things like this have just been happening all year and I feel so helpless. Like these couple months were supposed to make me feel better about things but everything else got in the way again. And just looking at the people in this group and where they falter and how it affects the whole really makes me have little faith in anything truly great coming out of it unless people really change. And so now I'm kinda at the point where I'm just gonna give it the rest of this year and hold out to see if I still feel this is worth it. Because it's becoming clear that my expectations and needs are different and what was supposed to comfort me isn't happening. But that's a big problem too is everyone's priorities and wants are in different places as well as their drive and commitment. And every day my mind is going NUTS in different directions because im searching for something to hold onto that gives me organization and stability. But the habit of this group leaves everything in the air. And when we think we are getting somewhere, everyone slowly just fades out and nothing gets dealt with. And then im over here like feeling like im going crazy. For example, we had planned for everyone to write out there expectations for Mystic Wish and what they want from the group. And last I heard, Mel told me I was the ONLY one to submit anything. The only thing I can imagine fixing this is not only does everyone need to be honest, but there needs to be  a hard ass telling people that if they aren't at least giving Mystic Wish their 100% dedication and most of their time, then they need to get booted. People need to have responsibility over themselves when it comes to contributing to the group. Cause coming to practice to only learn at practice wont cut it. Trying to wing a dance and piggyback off others wont cut it. Having an attitude when we need to make the group look as good as we can shouldn’t be tolerated. Like if this isn’t what you truly want for YOURSELF why are you here? This group should be a big priority to you. If we could just separate those who are better fit for LNAV and then those who truly want to give everything for MW I think the group would not only be managed better, but would be so much greater. I know Mel feels like she wants to give everyone a chance because she wants to reach for stuff together and not leave her friends behind on stuff, but....that’s not professional. We still have LNAV. That’s where everyone’s home is. But Mystic Wish is different. I mean, logically speaking, everyone should have the mindset of proving themselves, wanting to grow and not let anybody down. To help make the group better, if you feel like you can't do that, if you cant do good on your own, then you shouldn't be part of it. A group needs members who can stand on their own. If your ONLY source of motivation is everyone else around you, you’re not gonna get far. And I feel like I have tried stressing this on multiple occasions but it doesn’t get taken seriously enough. How much time and money are we going to spend before we decide if members are fit for MW? Especially because KKP is asking us to be more professional and work hard and this event I believe is going to be so beneficial to us when it comes to not only being able to perform but our connections to other great people who can help us climb the ladder. I don’t think we have time to let people decide whether or not they want this. It should already be clear at this point.

[awesomeadventuresofastudent]

Hey Guys, me again! I hope youre all doing well!

Thanks for coming back to my blog for the next blog post. This week I have some college organisation tips. I hope it helps!

I love being in college, and even more the start of college because I get to stock up on everything stationary and organisation. I love bring organised and everything to help being so, even if my living space says otherwise.

The following list is what I make sure to have before each year starts:

Pencil Case

Blue or Black Pens

Pencils

Pencil Sharpener

Highlighter

Permanent Marker

Eraser

Subject Dividers

Index Cards

Folders

Spiral Notebooks

Glue

Personal Organiser

Backpack

Lunchbox / Lunchbag

The following are some tips for organisation, to help out in the following year. There are a lot of tips to come, but note you wont have to follow every tip. Take on the ones that you enjoy and speak to!

Be Motivated:

How to become motivated!

Everyone starts somewhere: 

Know that everyone begins somewhere and no one is born with the ability to do everything and anything. Everyone must work to get to where they need/want to be.

     2. Anything can be learned:

As mentioned above, everyone must work to get to where they need/want to be. If you have a natural talent in one, thing but want to persue a career in another which you are not so talented in. You can 100% persue a career in it, and also learn everything about it! You just may need to put in a little more work than some other people would.

      3. Your past does not define you:

If you have a bad past with anything, be it family, education or anything, it does not define who you are or what you can do with your future. Say you never tried in school or were never very good at any of the subjects, this does not mean that you cant start trying in college or you wont do well either.

      4. Everyone faces obstacles:

Everyone in life will run into something that will put them at a stand still. It will put them in a different place to where they wished they would be at that time. Realise that when this happens, you are not the only one. You do what you can to work through or around the obstacle. In college, use the lecturers to help you figure out a way to get around them!

Planning:

Keep a Planner/ Planner app/ Calender.

Keep only one planner, not all of the above:

If more than one is used, it becomes too much to handle and too much to look at. Make sure to keep to one planner so everything you have planned is in one place.

Keep Planner with you at all times.

If you write it down, make sure to get it done.

Plan out your time at the beginning of each week/month.

Schedule chores:

This is to ensure that you dont procrastinate studying. I find myself doing the dishes or washing clothes instead of studying when I have a big exam the next day.

Lists:

Make an assignment list.

Keep a to-do list.

Routine and Time Keeping:

Wake up at the same time everyday.

Have a consistent schedule.

Figure out your most productive time.

Stock your backpack in advance:

This is to ensure that you do not spend 15 minutes every morning packing your backpack and making sure that you have everything. If you use the same bag everyday and have everything packed inside ready to go, you have more time in the morning to have a healthy breakfast and make sure your on time for your first lecture.

Cleaning:

Keep study space clean:

This is to ensure there is nothing to distract you.

Spend 5 minutes cleaning your bedroom/study area a day.

Classwork/Assignments:

Take notes constantly in class/lectures:

Never claim that you will remember when your lecturer has just said. You will not.

Dont question/stop yourself from writing your assignment.

A rough first draft is never an issue. Keep writing and writing and dont worry about grammer or spelling. Get to your word count and then things can be worked on.

Set your own deadlines:

If you have two assignments due in one day, set your own deadline to have one finished one day and the other finished the next. This is to ensure you do not have both to do the night before they are due.

Use a hard-drive:

This is to ensure that none of your hard work is lost when your laptop crashes. Its happened to the best of us! Mine cost €60, so it was totally worth it!

Give each class a colour.

Self Care:

Get enough sleep.

Meditate/yoga/mindfulness/prayer:

Make time for yourself. Gather your thoughts and forget about college or housework or friends/relationships. No netflix or social media in this moment. This is purely for you and your mind alone.

Go easy on yourself.

  Thank you very much for reading my blog guys. I hope you enjoyed, and I’ve helped you out with organisation. Have an amazing weekend ❤

  Bumble Bee xo

College Organisation Tips Hey Guys, me again! I hope youre all doing well! Thanks for coming back to my blog for the next blog post.