#but i can't even tell her about something that would affect the place we both work at without her getting so fuckin angry at me

[sskk-manifesto]

Ep 5!!!

[deepspacenova]

something that is both heartwarming and heartbreaking about Caleb is the way he consistently continues to fight his fate, despite every sign he encounters pointing toward its inevitability:

it's in the way he defies the Toring Chip, and the meaning of 7%

When Caleb falls apart on the bench with MC and the chip resets in Farspace Bloomfall, 100% of his mind is supposed to reset.... and yet only 93% of the chip is integrated and able to do so.

We know Caleb is aware of this too, when he tells MC to tell him about her problems “while I can still respond.” Because he knows he'll inevitably lose some information once it happens, like the 'patrol data' Enforcer mentions.

This means it’s happened before, Caleb's mind had been reset before. Which means, he knows if the chip’s integrity ever gets to 100% and resets, anything he feels toward MC will also reset. And so..

“…he’s purposefully ‘sealed’ his brain rather than damaging it.”

So Caleb gathered up every emotion, every memory, and every impression of MC in his mind, wrapped it all together into one small piece, and has since, against all odds, continuously used his Evol to put a barrier around it, to protect it. To keep the chip from finding it and wiping it. And what is that piece? That 7%?

7% is MC. 7% is his memories of MC. 7% is his love for MC.

it's in the way he's turned himself from "perfect weapon to destroy each other" to "perfect weapon to destroy others"

I could be wrong (please correct me), but I'm pretty sure it's murky right now whether Caleb (subject 002?) knew MC during any of her 'incarnations' in the lab and/or their purposes to be a killswitch for each other. But if he does know or remember any of it, the protection of that 7% from the Toring Chip becomes even more vital and strategic as all hell.

Because that would mean Caleb orchestrated a situation where he's become the lab subject, a decoy in MC's place as they try and correct the chip within him.

And that would mean that Caleb planned for them to "sacrifice a great deal to obtain him," — apparently, so much that they're unwilling/unable to simply dispose of him when he's resisting the very thing that would seal his fate as "the key", as MC's killswitch.

and it's in the literal beat of his heart

when you lay your hand over caleb's heart to hear his heartbeat, no matter how fast that beat starts out, if you hold your hand there long enough, his heartbeat inevitably tapers into a calm 50-60.

Despite all he's doing to preserve that 7%, he can't fight the nature of the other 93%. The nature of the chip and it's purpose to keep him in an emotional stasis.

His excitement to see you, his happiness to have you there, the fluttering of his heart? Those are abnormalities to the chip, those aren't in line with what that stasis is supposed to be. And so... no matter how quickly his heart beats for you initially, it inevitably gets suppressed.

We see how it affects other members of the Fleet too. How all of them have accepted the inevitability of the chip. Tuum Officer No. 6025 and Liam in particular shows us exactly what it looks like to give in.

And yet, every time you come back, Caleb's still excited, Caleb still fights it. He's fighting it with only 7% of his memory, he's fighting it with every quickened beat of his heart.

If the chip is a tether, if his fate is a tether, Caleb will never stop sawing at the strings, and i am not okay about it.

blame for any and all crash outs can be directed to @solifloris and @starmocha, who have managed to make my "down bad" for caleb turn into "sick to my stomach with eternal devotion"

[devotedlyandrogynousyouth]

AkrhamKnight! Jason Todd

Sensitive Topics: descriptions of a toxic relationship and mentions of physical abuse (none actually written)

AK! Jason Todd who you're not even sure what you have with. Every time you try to refer to him as your boyfriend or yourselves as together like you did before his death, he pulls away and gets defensive.

"There isn't an 'us,' sweetheart. I ain't letting shit from before that fucking clown got to me matter now."

But if you try to walk away from the situation or start talking to somebody else, he gets so incredibly jealous.

"Oh so you really need two guys' attention now? What a fucking whore..."

AK! Jason Todd who, if you couldn't tell by now, is so incredibly toxic in whatever situation you have. He cant stand to see you walk away but it kills you inside every time you come back to him and his baggage.

"Come one, sweetheart... It was just a mistake. We all make 'em, right? Don't you go leaving me over some petty shit like that."

AK! Jason Todd who absolutely loathes you going out at night. Even when he's there with you, it still puts him on edge to see you walking the cold, dark Gotham sidewalks when you could be safe in his apartment or the base instead.

AK! Jason Todd who just gets so mean with you for no reason. Well, not for little things like forgetting to pick up plastic wrap at the store or something. More like walking alone in Gotham without him knowing you were even gone. He hates the thought of something happening to his precious little thing.

AK! Jason Todd who would never physically harm you. Are insults thrown around like confetti? Absolutely! Is there a scream fight almost every week? You bet! But has he ever raised a finger against you? No. And he would never even think of it.

AK! Jason Todd who's absolutely pissed whenever somebody even looks at you for too long, nevermind making comments. You'd be surprised just how many of his soldiers he's gotten rid of just for telling him to "put his bitch in her place," or for telling you to "cover up, slut."

AK! Jason Todd who can't open up. He knows what he's doing is horrible. He knows that everything he does affects you in one way or another. But what about the horrible things other people have done? What about what the Joker did to him? What about Bruce letting the Joker roam free afterwards and replacing him with another goody two shoes? Jason wants to talk to you, he really does. But he just doesn't see how you or anybody, for that matter, coyld ever understand him or what he's been through.

AK! Jason Todd who found himself crying in the dark shadows of your shared apartment when Bruce first came along to stop his ridiculous plan to take over Gotham with Scarecrow's fear toxin. Jason loved Bruce. Bruce was his only family. But family means that nobody gets left behind and Bruce sure as hell broke that rule.

(This is actually kinda cannon: in Akrham Knight, one of the conversations you can overhear between a few of the gaurds mentions Jason crying after encountering Bruce for one of the first times)

AK! Jason Todd who truly does love you, in some way. He doesn't think he can be in love with you, but that doesnt makw him care about you any less. You're his person, and you've been there for him whether he likes it or not.

AK! Jason Todd who would absolutely lose it if anything were to ever happen to you. He never wants to see even a hair on your damn head hurt if he can help it. If one of his guards were to be responsible for an injury you sustained, they'd be out the door and probably six feet under in a heartbeat.

AK! Jason Todd who, no matter what your situation or relationship is like, refuses to let you see his chest. Yeah, his entire body is covered in scars, both from the Joker and other things he's experienced. But the 'Y' shaped scar on his chest is strictly off limits. If you were to ever accidentally brush your hand across it while laying with him or something, he wouldn't lash out, but he'd certainly guide your hand away by gently grasping your wrist.

AK! Jason Todd who never wants to see you involved with anything he does or his plans. He thinks that his activities are far too dangerous for you, even if you do happen to be somebody who's capeable of holding your own in combat or other high-stress situations.

Masterlist

[96wonulicious]

more than enough - c.hs

genre: fluff, tiny bit of angst

ㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡ

It was another casual day at practice, training for their 10th anniversary comeback in May. Of course these practices don't come without a little teasing here and there, that's just the usual stuff you got to deal with within the group. Today was no different, except todays main target was Vernon.

"Do you guys even like, kiss?" Jeonghan asked his younger friend. "Even share the same bed? With the way you sleep it wouldn't be weird for her to sleep somewhere else to be honest.." someone added. Usually this wasn't something Vernon cared about. He knew you loved him and knew he loved you even more.

Lately though, certain weverse messages about you have gotten to him. Fans talking about the lack of affection in your relationship, speculating your break up and all. Aside from this being incredibly disrespectful and annoying, it also affected Vernon a lot. Was he really THAT "cold" towards you? Do you know that he loves you more than himself? Do you think the same way fans and the boys do? All this teasing today made him even more insecure about this than he already was.

"Can I ask you something real quick?" Vernon asked his best friend Seungkwan after finishing their dance practice. "Sure, what is it? Is everything alright?" Seungkwan asked a bit concerned.

"Yeah, it's just...YN. I'm scared that she'll leave me.." he said, staring into his reflection in the big mirror. "Leave you? Now why the hell would she do that?" Seungkwan said shocked. He wasn't just Vernons best friend but also yours, and he clearly remembers every single occasion where you would only talk about Vernon and your love for him. Hearing this out of his best friends mouth now made absolutely no sense to him.

"Ever since people found out about us, they've been saying that she'll leave me once she sees how exhausting it is to be with someone 'emotionally inexpressive'. I just can't bear to lose her. She's the love of my life, my world..my everything" Vernon said, his voice shaking. He felt like the walls were closing in on him. "I had this really bad nightmare a few nights ago. I was with YN, and she suddenly said she needed to talk to me..And what she said was, was.." he stopped, his voice cracking and tears welling up in his eyes. "I can't even say it oh god" he said. This is the first time in years something has hit him so bad it made him cry out of fear.

Seungkwan knew what Vernon was talking about. He tried his best to comfort him, to calm him down and talk some encouraging words into him. "You know, why don't you just talk to her? We both know that you can tell her ANYTHING, especially you, her boyfriend. I can guarantee that she loves you more than everything in this universe, so please do me, her and yourself a favour and just talk to her."

Vernon knew what he had to do. The only way to fix this is to talk to you, no matter how uncomfortable it was going to be for him. He knows you will always listen to what he has to say, so why wouldn't you this time? "Should I drive you home?" Seungkwan asked. "I'm good thank you, I'll walk. I'll have more time to think about how I'll tell her.." Vernon answered, already heading out the door.

He was imagining every way the conversation could go, his legs just automatically taking him home to you. When his keys slid into the keyhole and the doorknob started to turn in his hand, his heart started pounding in his chest. He was scared of this conversation, scared that you'll think of him as "weak" or "insecure".

"Babe? I'm home" he shouted, hoping for an answer from you. "In the kitchen!!" you happily answered. You were happy your boyfriend finally came home. He took his shoes off, placed his backpack next to them and made his way into the kitchen. His palms were sweaty and his breathing got heavier. You greeted him with your usual big hug and a kiss, smiling at him. "How was practi-..Why are your eyes so red? Are you okay?" you asked full of concern.

With that, he just broke down in your arms. You didn't quite know how to react, figuring the best thing to do right now was to just hold him and let him cry. It broke your heart, seeing your boyfriend like this. "Come on, let's go sit on the couch" you suggested and led him to the living room. You sat down and put an arm around him, pulling him close again. His head was resting on your chest, soft sniffles here and there and holding onto you like you'd disappear once he let go.

"What's wrong love? Please talk to me.." you said while gently running your fingers through his hair. "Do I make you feel unloved?" he asked, his red eyes staring right into yours. "What? Where is this coming from??!!" you asked in shock. "Well, fans have been saying some mean things on weverse about you breaking up with me, and you being tired of my lack of affection in our relationship. The boys also said some things today that made me.." he said, tears rolling down his cheeks again. "..made me think maybe you'd be happier with someone else. Someone who won't shy away from kissing you in public, someone who will do literally anything for people to know you're his."

You couldn't believe your ears. Your hand instinctively pulled his head back to your chest, your head resting on top of his. You took a deep breath, before speaking up.

"You are way more than enough Vernon. You make me the happiest girl alive, everything is better when I'm with you and I could never ever in any world feel unloved by you. First of all they know NOTHING about what we do in private, so how would they know you're not actually hogging me every morning because you want to stay in bed with me? Secondly, they're just jealous. It's so obvious, the fans because I'm dating literally the most handsome, gorgeous, fantastic, amazing, BEST artist ever!!"

"Oh and the boys are just jealous 'cuz they get ZERO bitches" you said and rolled your eyes. This made Vernon laugh a little and you were happy you could cheer your boyfriend up a bit.

"Thank you for accepting me the way I am. I'm so so unbelievably happy to be with you my dear, I couldn't imagine a better life.." he said before kissing you. You spent the rest of the night lounging on the couch, just holding eachother while thinking about how lucky you guys got to have eachother.

[lorasdolly]

doctor gf!abby finding you in the er of the hospital she works act and acting all concerned and cutesy

𝙾𝙽 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙹𝙾𝙱 𝚍𝚘𝚌𝚝𝚘𝚛 𝚊𝚋𝚋𝚢

It was nearing night time, meaning that Abby would be home soon from her excruciatingly long shift.

Abby took longer shifts, allowing herself to make enough money for the both of you. She prided herself in have the capacity to take care of you, cherish you, and everything else she wished.

So, to appreciate that, you decided to make her a special dinner. Even if it was dark out, Abby hardly got breaks on the job.

You were aware, yet she told you not to worry.

You worried, nonetheless, taking it into your own hands today. The only downside was the shakiness of your hands from the winter weather.

Since the oil was hot, practically spiking, you tried to begin the cooking process. Till the quickness of dropping something took you by suprise, one thing leading to another, and your hand getting burnt from burning oil.

Your first reaction was to yell, and once you got out a couple tears, your next step was to grit your teeth and do something about it.

Tears kept spilling but you were frantically getting Abby's first aid kits. You had told her it wasn't necessary, but she knew you better than you knew yourself, storing them in random little places for fast accessibility.

You took a damp towel specifically made for burns and draped it over your hand, then grabbing a coat and keys.

You drove, clenching your jaw at an attempt to distract yourself from the chronic and stinging pain. Pulling into the ER room Abby worked at, you walked to the lobby and showed them the burn.

Desperately you spoke, "I need my girlfriend– God, now—"

A nurse directed you to a patient room, prioritizing your case before the burn could get any worse. You hadn't even got a chance to tell her your girlfriend's name.

Yet, the nurse knew. With the birthstone promise ring on your hand, she could already assume only one doctor had such a deep affection for their girlfriend.

After a few minutes of bouncing your leg up and down, the door swung open simultaneously with the noise of elastic gloves being pulled into place.

Your watery eyes stared up at Abby, a small groan leaving your parted lips. "Abs'—"

She shook her and made her way to you, grabbing the wrist of the damaged hand tenderly to inspect the burn. "How on earth did this happen, angel?"

Her concern seeped through not only her words, but actions. She observed the severity of the burn, nearly sighing in relief when she realized it could be easily taken care of.

"Nearly went into cardiac arrest when the nurse called for me," She spoke heartily.

"I– I was making you dinner," you began, words panicky and all squished in one breath.

She allowed you to keep speaking while grabbing supply to clean the wound, nodding and humming in acknowledgement in every second.

"It had oil in the recipe, so– so I heated it on the pan," you kept breathing unevenly, explaining with shaky hands.

Abby could grasp where the rest of the story went, but she let you continue, washing the area with a light soap and lukewarm water on a towel. She was insanely focused on both taking care of you and listening to you.

"It spilled, I got burned, rushed here—" Abby cut you off with an „uh-huh“.

A frown presented on your lips, watching her apply ointment, "It's not that bad, babe. Just need to be more careful." Abby said, never lifting her gaze off your hand.

"How 'bout we order take out next time you feel like doing something sweet?" A humorlessly chuckle came from her throat, an attempt to calm herself down from the insane worry of ever leaving you alone again.

"It was an accident, Abs'." You said with a petulant expression. "You can't forbid me from cooking." You declared but she didn't take it that seriously, tilting her head in a "That's exactly what I'm going to do." look.

"Maybe I'll just install cameras anywhere you could get hurt this way." She alternated, a brow cocked at her own idea.

You rolled your eyes, uninjured hand coming to rest on Abby's shoulder. Abby didn't react, simply bandaging the burn properly.

"Abs', I'm sorry." You whispered, your lips lingering over her ear.

She paused in her movements, the process over with. A sigh left her, a hefty sigh. "I'm not mad, babe. I'm worried." She clarified, making eye contact with you and as hand encircled your wrist.

You didn't reply, mesmerized with how she lifted your burned hand to her lips, kissing the wrists tenderly. The pecks traced to your palm, a firmer kiss left there.

"I should clock out now, no?" She asked after a hot minute of silence. She received a nod from you, a quiet craving to have her all to yourself at home, pampered and loved.

"I'll cook for us. Stay far away from the kitchen." She released your wrist, using the moment to lighten the tension with humor.

[arisewanekosuki]

Request by @mitsumina12345 of Sethos, Heizou, Gorou and Kazuha reaction when you think they like Lumine.

Sethos is easy going guy, he is not troubled by the competition over your heart at all. But it's not like he is not doing anything ether. Taking you for strolls in Sumeru, talking with you whenever he can. If he stayed at Teapot he always joins to help you do commissions or just go with you to travel for a bit. Just whenever you two meet you can be sure he would love to spend time with you and he thought you can at least see his interest in you. And yet. Now, with curiosity, he listens to you talking what he should do to charm Lumine. He already knew you're oblivious but never expected that you will think of him (or any other guys) being into Traveler. Your mind works in interesting ways, he has to admit. After you finished giving suggestions how he can win Lumine's heart, he smiled and thanked. Then he said that Traveler is not the one his heart yearns for. You were silent for moment, surprised by this. -"Then who is it?!" you asked. Sethos with mischievous smile said -"How about I will help you find it?" You were pouting that he doesn't want to tell you immediately but thanks to that you both are going to spend even more time together trying to 'find' the one he loves dearly.

Heizou in his free time loves to read detective novels and flirts with you. He is already aware you're obvious, many times you wouldn't react to his words or touches of affection. Once in awhile you would show some reaction to his romantic advances, but it always ends up with you pouting and saying "Don't joke like that...". He can't help but find even this reaction very cute. But he wasn't ready to learn to what lenghts your obliviousness reaches. He was traveling with your group, when you all make a camp you asked him to follow you. You wanted to have private conversation with him. He knew it won't be any confession or anything like that but he still hoped for one (maybe it will be his chance to confess?). When you were far away from Lumine and Paimon, you turned towards him and sighed. -"Heizou... there is something I want to tell you..." His heart started to beat faster... hoping for those three words. You placed both hands on his shoulders and looked into his eyes. -"You don't have to worry... I will help you win Lumine's heart!!" Hm? He asked if you can repeated and you did, with big smile and wink. He was lost at words, from everything he could expect he never could think that you will say this. The urge to just kiss you right then and there to make you realize you're the one he wants was too much to bear, but he resisted it. Instead, he grabbed your hands and smiled. An evil idea sparked in his mind. -"Ah, my dear partner, but Lumine already has somebody else... I promised I won't tell anyone who it is, but still I had to give up my feelings for her. Please let me have this moment with you" You were surprised but he was quick and didn't allow you to pry further into the matter, instead he carefully chose his words to make you pity him. You spent the rest of the break hugging and comforting him.

Gorou is a veteran warrior, he can fight with Shougn's army anytime, but when it comes to dates and flirting he just wants to retreat to his house. He is already grateful to Sangonomiya for giving him some ideas for dates with you, but in the end most of them looked like two friends just hanging out. One time he managed to invite you to eat some desserts. But what he didn't expected was for this Kitsune to arrive while the two of you enjoyed cake. -"Oh my, our general finally took the little one for a date?~ How cute!" She smirked. Gorou already started to growl in anger and embarrassment at her. -"Oh Miko, don't tease him please! And we are not on a date anyway…" this made the boy look at you with sadness in his eyes. His ears and tail drooped down. However, you continued looking at him with a proud smile -"Because he is into Lumine!" There was a silence. Then Yae Miko tried to hold her laugh. When she claimed a bit she said. -"Is that so? Fufufu~ Oh general... it seems you have to come up with a better strategy to win in this love war~." After that she bid you two farewell. You looked at Gorou with confusion. But he was too shocked to say anything. You came closer to him. -"Do you want me help you win Lumine's heart?" You said with a smile. And the worst thing is that he can't say 'no' when you smile like this, so he replied with 'yes'. Later he really regretted this.

Kazuha is already happy that he can be by your side, whether you're aware of his feelings or not. This is why he was confused when you insisted for him to spend more time with Lumine. In the end he will always bring you two so the three of you spend time together (or four if Paimon is not busy eating or sleeping). He noticed how Lumine feels a bit awkward, after all she is too aware of his feelings towards you. But whenever she will try to give you two space you would bring her again and then you try to run away from them. One time when he managed to spend some time alone with you, you started talking about the blonde traveler. -"Lumi is so brave and fearless but it seems she is too shy when it comes to love." You chuckled. "But it's good! This means she reciprocates your feelings!!" Kazuha was surprised. Him and Lumine? And he is sure Lumine doesn't feel in such way towards him. He gently took your hand and told you that he treats Lumine as a friend and nothing more. That was a good opportunity to confess but there still was hesitation on how you will react to this. Before he could say anything you gasped. -"Oh no! So this was a misunderstanding?! I... I told Lumi that for sure you love her back! Oh no! She is going to get heart broken because of me! I have to fix this!" you got up and started to run looking for Traveler. Kazuha was surprised by this but then he smiled and placed his face on his hand looking lovestruck at the way you went after your friend. You're truly adorable.

[mass-angel-exodus]

Disorganized tcoaal yapping again.

Cw rape

I've mentioned this before but even now I still believe Ashley isn't attracted to Andrew at all. If anything after seeing the playthrough she seems. Sex repulsed.

Andrew is the one that's sexually attracted to her and like he said, she's very perceptive. She doesn't start being sexual with Andrew until he gets a girlfriend because that's the one thing a girlfriend can give him that she can't. But if it wasn't for Andrew she seems so repulsed by it. She's disgusted that men only want sex, even more so that Andrew wants it and would betray her by seeing someone just for that. When that boy tries to go on a date with her Andrew's first thought is that she's so desperate for love she'd let a man fuck her but ashley doesn't even go. She seems uncomfortable. Scared even. And when she gets the job at the massage parlor she's clearly disgusted and Renee thinks she's doing it to get back at her. And she might be cause when she's younger we see she acts out so that her mother will acknowledge her in some way, but also because no other job is willing to take her. And at this point in her life she feels that the only person who loves her discarded her because of her lack of sexual value, so she thinks that's the only thing she has. She hates the job, but if they hired her she must be worth that in some way. And as angry as she is with Andrew, She's happy that he at least cared enough to fight with her about it. Cause he's the only one in her family that does.

Even in scenes where she reciprocates that affection, I notice she only does that when Andrew initiates. Especially in the demon realm. Like andrew is extremely affectionate here compared to how restrained he was in the human realm cause he knows no one is watching. It's always him that starts. She's a little confused/hesitant/surprised, and then she returns it. The only other times I can remember her sexually initiating is when she feels threatened in some way.

The worst instance of this is what she does when she imprisons him and Julia helps him free. He's gets his closure with Julia and gives her a proper good bye, and while he doesn't really feel any real hurt that she's gone the immediate next thing he thinks is "God damn I should have talked her into fucking me before she left". And when he comes back ashley is furious and terrified and of course accuses him of sleeping with Julia. He doesn't, but she knows him well enough to know that's what's on his mind. I can't remember if this is the route where he beats the shit out of her. But I do know that she has sex with him while he's drunk and she's persistent and keeps telling him she wants him to fuck her. This is rape. Like there's no question about it. Andrew is drunk and he keeps telling her is they do have sex he doesn't want it to be like this but she keeps persisting. So he gives in. It's sexual assault and I'm not defending it. But even then ashley isn't wet at all. I think it even hurts her. She's doing this out of desperation cause she's frantic and terrified. She doesn't enjoy it. But it's a means to an end to make him stay cause she was so close to losing him.

And in the route where they decide to live as a couple, they hate each other. They have sex often sure but ashley often hurts him by scratching him and stuff and Andrew knows she's doing it to hurt him but they both pretend it's a kink thing. They despise each other and both keep using sex as a bandaid solution to something the other doesn't want. And with how violent Andrew's sexual fantasies as with Julia [yknow someone he used in place of ashley] I can only imagine that ashley doing that to him is reciprocal to what he does to her during sex.

It's hard to watch because it's two people doing what they think the other wants when neither wants it. Not like this anyway.

But yeah long story short Ashley isn't sexually attracted to Andrew sex is still just a means to an end for her.

[sillygoosealert]

Both arms cradle you now (Before you're wrapped in cloth)

ANGST, DEATH, comfort and fluff in the beginning !! (trust me..)

There is no one to relate to you. You feel so much and let it fill you, eventually becoming your only defying trait. Some even knew you as the girl who will always be forgotten at best and Sukuna's second option at worst. If you were forgotten, you were just like others. If you were a second option, you just weren't good enough.

But as your thoughts consume you, knowing the people around you stare with something close, but not quite pity. Someone sits beside you while you're self-loathing in the tea house.

It was raining not too long ago, hence why you chose to get under somewhere covered instead of the many benches and grassy spots across the garden.

When you look beside you, you see a radiant girl with a smile that stretches ear to ear. Saying anything else about her appearance is difficult, as trying to remember her face is just a blur.

She was close to being the Great Sukuna's second wife but came just 3rd place when next to you and Haruko. In your opinion, she was better than you. Loads more optimistic than you if you were asked to be more specific.

She was humming something absentmindedly, tapping her fingers against her lap.

"Did you ever think about your future with Sukuna? With and without him having a seconded wife," There's no eye contact when she asks that, just more humming and admiring the wet landscape.

"A little. But I don't have a say in how most things go, so I don't get my hopes up."

"I think you have more of a say than you realize," She pauses before going on.

"The garden always looks so pretty when it rains, more comforting." You snort at that, knowing you wouldn't be out here if you knew it would rain.

"I'm glad you have something positive to say about it. I think it's too melancholy," Relaxing a little, you take another look at her, soaking in the smile still plastered on her face.

"Did you ever fantasize about being the wife of Sukuna?" At the moment, you immediately want to take back your words, but you're glad you asked. It's nice to keep talking to her.

"Much more than I'd tell. I wanted a cute room with a baby and a garden just for the three of us. I even picked out baby names- boy and girl."

"Sounds like you had it planned out."

"We did. If only I could know what I know now," She says with a shakey voice, and when you look over, her eyes are wet with tears; that's your clue not to pry anymore.

"I notice your eyes gloss over when he's with Haruko. I want you to know I see you," Now she's looking at you, and you bring yourself to look right back at her.

"Do you know what it's like to mourn something and not know what it is at the same time?" You choke out.

"Yes, I do," She smiles at that, and while your eyes can't reciprocate it, you smile back.

"I'm not sure how someone with so many eyes can't see he's hurting you. I don't think I could ever treat you so negligently if you were my wife," That makes you giggle, in turn letting a few tears fall from your eyes.

"Really?"

"Really. I wouldn't take you for granted by getting a second wife," Those words remind you that there was a time when it was just you and Sukuna. Nothing in his behavior has changed off the top of your head, but seeing him so easily give that affection to someone else still stings.

"I think I need to go. Goodbye," With that, she stands up, not adorning a big smile anymore, but a more standard look for someone who has gone through nothing but hurt. You probably won't see her anymore, as the look in her eyes tells you something has died- most likely her hope. It reminds you of going through so many remedies for anxiety only to realize it won't go away. Nothing stopped your overthinking, and nothing most likely will.

You make your way to Sukuna's room, now with a new perspective on how you see yourself.

But your thoughts get cloudy when you're sat with him in the room.

"I don't want to be with you," the words come out much blunter than you meant them to, but he responds before you can say anything else.

"Wherever you have found this new confidence, leave it," He gets up to leave.

"You have another wife. Are you that selfish you must have two?" This makes him turn around.

"Selfish? You have everything you could ever need. You dare to call me selfish?" He scoffs, getting closer to you.

"The nightstand that was custom made for you, in my room? The paintings across the halls, for you? The garden I had made for you?"

"Was I the one in mind, or were those choices made after you weren't satisfied with one wife? I never wanted half of the things forced into my hands. I wanted you to listen to me. You used to," And with that, he grabs you off the bed and shoves you to the ground.

"I still have to listen to you. Name one time I didn't."

"I asked to spend a day with you in the garden. I spent the day with you and Haruko in the garden."

"You got what you asked. Give a better example and a reason I should listen."

"I asked for pink Daisies by the fountain in the garden. You put the white ones, Haruko, couldn't stop raving over by the fountain in the front and the pink ones in the back." His eyes widen, and he opens his mouth.

"You're jealous," It sounds like he's in disbelief, but you know he's mocking you in his own way.

"Of course I'm jealous! I wasn't enough for you, so you got another wife. Now I'm seconded place to the one person who's supposed to love me."

"I don't love you," This comes out more as a confused question than a statement.

"I hate you so much, Ryomen."

When he goes to grab your head, your first reaction is to cover your face. But as time slows and the grip on your hair tightens, you realize you were wrong.

Sukuna never loved you. This wasn't him falling out of love with you for someone else. He liked you, so he kept you around- but he loved Haruko, so he wanted her to stay with him.

And when your head is bashed repeatedly into the desk he got for her, your last few conscious moments are spent realizing that. It was silly of you to think anything else.

Your knees buckle beneath your deadweight, forcing your body into an uncomfortable praying position; your hands stretched out in front, giving your head a soft spot to rest on.

Even in death, all you can do is pray for a different outcome. But all you can do now is wait for your vision to fully become dark as pieces of your skull pierce your brain, effectively killing you in the process.

Sukuna almost doesn't hear Haruko creak open the door, worried after she hears cracking noises. What she didn't know was what she heard was your head splintering. But what she knows now is despite having two pairs of arms and two sets of eyes, Ryomen Sukuna only needs one wife to be complete.

this took longer than I'd like admit, I MIGHT go on a break for like 3 days because I am getting worse but I am getting anxiety meds so if they help more fluff!!! but if they don't more angst and ill probably crawl into a hole and die.

[writtenbyan-aries]

This story will get dark and contain things that some readers might find unsettling and/or triggering.  PLEASE DONT READ IF THIS IS SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT COMFORTABLE WITH!!

Summary: Things get a little out of hand as you explore the Missouri Farmhouse with Sam and Colby.

Warnings include: talk of death and suicide, mentions of good and evil spirits, mentions of a brothel, reader being touched, spoken to, and tormented by spirits, mentions of being scratched, pushed, shoved, mentions of blood and puking, Estes method and other things some readers might find unsuitable - please read with caution my lovelies!

Disclaimer: everything in this story is completely off the top of my head, meaning I made it all up and also, y/n has a little thing going on with both Sam and Colby, but nothing is official. Enjoy!

Word count: a little over 16k | NOT edited

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"Yeah, okay. Thanks." Sam nods his head, "Alright. See you in a few days." He hangs up and sits down, "So." He ruffles his hair and looks between you and Colby.

"What's up, man?" Colby leans forward, elbows resting on his knees, "Was that Trevor?"

Sam nods, "Yeah it was."

"Who's Trevor?" You ask looking between them. You could tell something was up, but you didn't know what, "Sam. What's going on?"

"So.. Trevor is the owner of the house we're going to in a few days, and he said that we should rethink about bringing you along."

"Bringing.." Colby points to you, "Y/n along? Why?"

Sam leans back, "I guess having a female there just won't be a good idea according to Trevor."

"Why?" You shake your head slightly and sit up. Sam shrugs, "I guess when other female investigators that went, they left pretty banged up."

You raise your brows, "Well it's a good thing I can handle a few bumps and bruises."

Colby pulls on the corner of your sweater and you look at him. You can tell that he is only concerned for your safety right now, so anything you say will just go in one  ear and right out of the other.

You look back at Sam, "So what? I'm just going to be excluded from this?"

Sam sighs, "Trevor said that it's all up to you. If you want to go, no one will stop you."

"Well I wouldn't say no one." Colby chuckles slightly and looks up at you and Sam staring at him. He quickly covers it up, "She's our best friend Sam. Why would we potentially put her in danger? Especially since the owner of the house is telling us not to bring her?"

"He said it's her choice so I mean-"

You cut Sam off, "Yes. Exactly. And I want to go."

"Have you read up on the place we're going to?" Sam raises his brows and you stare at him, "No.. but I can."

He gets up, "Look, I'm all for you going with us y/n. You're a vital part of the team, you see things we can't sometimes, so of course we want you to go." He sighs, "Just read up on it then decide whether or not you want to still go. I'm going to go make sure we have all the equipment we need."

You watch as he walks away and then you turn to Colby, "why am I getting an irritated vibe from Sam?"

Colby shrugs, "Probably because of what Trevor told him, and because he cares about you." He turns towards you, taking your hand in his, "We don't want to put you in any harms way, okay?"

"Colby." You laugh slightly, "Everywhere I go with you guys, well not everywhere but the investigations specifically.. anything could happen. I've be targeted before. I've been scratched before. I honestly think I've been through it all with you guys."

He smiles and nods, "Yeah, no you're right, I just." He pauses and lets out a sigh, "We just don't want you getting permanently affected by anything."

You nod, squeezing his hand, "How about this.. I'll go read up on the Missouri Farmhouse and then I'll get back to you guys after?"

He smirks and nods, "Okay."

"What's that smirk for?" You tilt your head and he shakes his head, "I just.. I just know that you're going to still want to go even after reading up on it."

You purse your lips together and blink a few times.

"I know you so well." Colby smiles and stands up, "I'm going to go help Sam." You watch as he walks away before reaching forward for your laptop.

The keys clack in the silence as you type in Missouri Farmhouse.

You click on a link with the same image that Colby texted you and your eyebrows raise at the first headline.

Uncovered: Multiple Prostitutes Found Dead, Miles From Missouri Farmhouse

Your eyes scan over the paragraph, Arlon Wheeler has been named leader of the satanic rituals involving the sacrifice of female prostitutes.

"Satanic rituals?" You shake your head, scanning back over the old news article, Arlon Wheeler's wife, Cordelia Wheeler, came front with authorities and confessed to everything her husband and others involved have done.

You click back, trying to find a more recent one, mainly one about people investigating it.

"Oh, yes." You click on a link and your eyes widen at the second headline.

Scratching the Surface: Ghost Investigators Leave Missouri Farmhouse Scratched and Bruised.

You scroll down, eyes widening as you read, 'Yeah, we went in knowing that it could get a little wild, but I honestly didn't think that I would be leaving with five scratches and a few bruises. I partially can't recall what happened after entering the barn, but other than that, I can tell you that if you are a female ghost hunter, please proceed with caution.' Lyvie said. I asked her about the barn and she said, 'Oh yeah.. the barn. That's where the brothel - I guess, took place. Along long with the said rituals.'

A chill is sent down your spine as you sit up, taking in what you just read, but it just seems to get worse and worse.

'With further research, it has been found that Arlon and Cordelia Wheeler would plan for Cordelia to go into town and to pick up naive females and return with them for Arlon Wheeler's sadistic needs.'

You pinch the bridge of your nose and let out a sigh.

"That doesn't sound like a sigh of relief." Sam jokes as he sits next to you. He leans over, eyes scanning over your computer, "Mm, I see. Reading up on what you're getting yourself into?" You laugh slightly and look over at him, "Yeah, yeah."

You shake your head, looking back down at your computer, "I just.. That place is full of hatred."

"What do you mean?" Sam leans back against the couch and you point to the screen, "Between Arlon being sold out by his wife to all of those innocent girls being slaughtered for absolutely no reason." You look at Sam, "It's going to be a good video, but at what cost?"

You close your laptop and lean back, "I don't want you guys going in something like that alone." You smirk slightly, "What kind of friend would I be?"

"Friend.." Sam chuckles as he extends his arm over the back of the couch, "I'm just super anxious, because with you being a living female, I just have this weird feeling as to why there's so many reports on other investigators getting injured."

You lean in and rest your head on his shoulder, "Jealousy?" You turn your head to look up at him and he looks down at you, "Oh yeah." You smile, "Why's that, Sam?"

You can see his cheeks turning red as he tries to keep his composure, "Because.. As a pretty girl walking into something like that I-"

Colby cuts him off as he walks down the steps, "I'm looking at plane tickets. How many do I need?"

You sit up, looking from Colby to Sam. He smirks and holds up three fingers, "Three."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

""What's up guys.. It's Sam and Colby." Colby motions to the empty spot where Sam should be. He looks at the camera again and sighs, "What's up guys. It's Colby Brock, And today, we are currently at the airport, waiting to board our flight to Missouri." He tilts his head, giving a confused look, "Now, you're probably wondering, guys why are you at the airport waiting to go to Missouri? Well, we'll tell you."

Sam moves into frame and gives an awkward stare into the camera, "Hi." You laugh quietly, shaking your head as they continue the intro for the video.

"Sam, do you want to tell the people why we're going to Missouri?" Colby motions towards the camera and Sam looks at Colby, leaning in to mumble, "Why are we going to Missouri?"

You and Colby laugh at Sam and he sighs, "We are heading to a massively haunted farmhouse there. It is known for leaving a, figurative and literal mark on the people that go there to investigate."

"We're super nervous about this, considering what Sam says, I will be majorly surprised if we all make it out unscathed." Colby grabs the camera, turning it around on you, "We also have the very risk taking y/n here for this trip."

You smile and wave to the camera, "Nice intro for me, Colby." You laugh and he turns the camera around on himself, "I thought it was pretty bad ass, but okay." He laughs, "See you guys on the plane." He lays his hand on the lense and turns the camera off.

Sam sits down next to you, "Is anyone else actually kind of excited about this?"

You look over at him, "I'm half and half."

He leans forward, and you both look at Colby, "What about you?" Colby leans forward and shrugs, "I'm.. here." He laughs and you nod, "Yeah, that sounds about right."

"Hey, you cou-"

You cut Sam off, "I didn't want to stay home." He raises his hands, "Alright." He laughs, making you smile. He shake his head, "We couldn't get you to stay home even if we tied you to-"

"Oh my gosh!" A girl squeals, inconveniently cutting Sam off, "Are you guys really Sam and Colby? Like is this happening right now?"

Sam points to himself, "Yeah, I'm Colby and that's Sam." He points to Colby and Colby waves with a smile, "Yeah, my hair is a little darker than usual."

You smile and look up at the girl. Her jaw drops, "Oh my g- You're y/n! Are you guys making a video right now?"

You're shocked that she knows who you are, because you don't really get recognized much, "Yeah." You laugh slightly, "It's me." You glance over at Sam and he nods, "Yeah, were actually heading to Missouri right now to shoot a video."

All the girl can do is smile, "That's so freaking cool. Can I get a picture with all of you, please?"

You all agree and stand up as she finds someone to take the picture. You stand next to Colby as the girl stands between him and Sam. Colby wraps his arm around your waist, fingers gently rubbing your side as the stranger takes a few pictures.

"Thank you so much. oh my god, I can't wait to show my friends." She looks up from her phone, "They love you guys so much, they're going to freak."

"Thank you for stopping!" Colby smiles and gives the girl a hug, same with Sam, "Be on the lookout for this video. It's something you're not going to want to miss."

She nods, "I won't I promise." She looks at you, "Can I get a picture with you?" You look from her to Sam and back to her, "Of course, yes." She hands her phone to Sam and moves to stand next to you so Sam can take a few photos.

"Thank you so much, have a good flight!" She waves as she walks away and you turn to look at Colby, "Did that just happen?" He nods with a smile, "It sure did."

"Have you ever gotten stopped like that?" Sam asks as you all sit back down. You shake your head, "Nope. But I love it." You laugh slightly and Colby stands up, "I'm going to go get a drink, do you need anything?" You look over him and shake your head, "I have my water."

He motions to Sam, and Sam nods, "Just get me what you get."

You watch Colbt walk away before looking at Sam, "So what were you saying before all of that?"

He smirks and shakes his head, "About what?"

You smile and sigh, "oh you know, about me not staying home no matter what you did?" He laughs and sighs, "oh that.. Yeah, I was just saying how even if we tied you up at home you'd still find a way to come with." He leans in, "But something tells me that if we were to do that, no one would be going anywhere."

You sit up straight as his words send an intrigued shiver down your spine. You smile and look over at him, "This isn't some sort of I better say what i want now incase we don't make it back kind of thing is it?"

He laughs at your tease and shrugs, "I mean.. if it was.. I wouldn't say that and I definitely wouldn't be saying it here." He looks up as Colby walks back over, reaching up to take his drink.

Colby sits down next to you and sighs, "So what are we talking about over here?"

"Oh you know.." You look over at him, "Sam was just confessing his unprofound love for me, no biggie." You look at Sam and right before he can say anything, your flight is announced over the speakers.

"Oh look at that, perfect timing." Sam smirks and stands up. You look over at Colby and stand up, "Ready to fly into some spook-tacular fun?"

He laughs and points to you as he stands up, "You are definitely saying that on camera."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

The plane ride was quick, considering you fell asleep as soon as the plane took off. You woke up on the shoulder of a sleeping Sam.

"Morning sleepy head." Colby whispers with a smile. You wipe the little amount of drool from the corner of your mouth and smile, "Isn't it like four p.m?" He laughs and nods, "Yeah, I guess you're right."

The flight attendant annouces that you'll be landing shortly so you reach over to nudge Sam, "Hey.. Hey.. Sam. Samuel. Samuel John.." You look at Colby and back to Sam, "Samuel John Golbach."

You laugh slightly, "If you don't wake up, Colby will have no choice but to kiss you."

Colby leans forward, "What now?!"

"I'd like it better.." Sam sits up straight and looks at you, "If you kissed me instead."

You smirk, looking away to hide the blush growing on your cheeks and Colby holds his hand up, "Whoa. I think it'll be fair if she just kisses us both."

"You would like that wouldn't you?" You smirk at him and he nods, "Very much so." You lean back in your seat, the anxiety of going to that house tomorrow sets in.

The news articles flash in your mind, images of the the scratches and bruises people have received slip into the mix as well.

You didn't know your leg was bouncing a mile a minute until Sam lays a hand on your knee, "You good?" He asks with a slight laugh and you look over at him, "Yeah, I just got to thinking about the house."

Sam wants to suggest you staying at the hotel, but he and Colby both know that that isn't going to happen.

"I'm just.. what you told me about what Trevor said, it's just circling in my mind and I mean, maybe.." you shrug,"..I'm having second thoughts but I just can't let you guys go alone."

Sam smiles slightly and nods, "No, I know what you mean."

You all get up and get off the plane, making your way to the baggage claim. You yawn, laying a hand over your mouth, "Thank god we don't have to go until tomorrow."

You walk up, picking up your suitcase. Sam and Colby follow behind you, "Yeah, we all need to rest up before going there." Sam says, looking at Colby, "Do you want me to film or you?"

Colby shrugs, "Doesn't matter to me." Sam nods and you follow him over to a bench before he pulls out the camera, "Well guys. We have landed here in Missouri. Going to head to the hotel now and that's where we'll give you the rundown about everything that's going on tomorrow night."

"Colby, y/n." Sam turns the camera to face you guys, "How are we feeling?"

"Tired." You say with a laugh, "And kinda nervous, because we're only a few hours away from the house and I'm just.." you shrug, "Anticipating the scariness of it, I guess."

Colby nods, pointing his thumb towards you, "Exactly what she said." He laughs and nods, "But I'm ready."

Sam turns the camera back to himself and points, "See you guys in a few." Sam turns the camera off, putting it back in his backpack, "Alright, let's get to the hotel."

You make your way to the car that they rented and throw your stuff in the trunk. You get in and shut the door, waiting as they get in.

"So how far from the house will we he once we reach the hotel?" You lean over and look forward in between them.

"Um.." Colby thinks, "About an hour and a half, two with traffic maybe?"

You nod, "okay." You get on your phone, typing in the house you're going to into the search bar again. You click on a link you haven't looked at yet and rest your head against the headrest as you bring your phone up to read.

We got in contact with a group of ghost hunters to talk about their experiences at The Missouri Farmhouse. One said, 'Yeah, I was walking towards the barn and all of a sudden I was on the ground, almost like something came barreling behind me and I was in the way.'

Another said, 'I was standing on the porch of the home, just looking out over the dark cornfields when I felt something wet on my back and my shirt was kind of sticking to me. We went in the summer so I thought maybe it was just sweat - I was wrong. I had my friend shine her light on my back as I lifted up my shirt and I still can't get the way she gasped in shock out of my mind. I had two scratches going down my back and what I was feeling wasn't sweat - it was blood. My blood. I left right then and there and I don't plan on ever going back.'

"This person said that they were scratched so bad that blood was drawn." You look up and Sam and Colby both glance back at you, "I'm reading more on the house, and everything I'm seeing just gets worse."

"It's not going to be an easy night. That's for sure." Sam shakes his head as he comes to a stop at the red light, "We have to go in with a positive mindset, because if we go in with negative one, all we're going to get is a negative reaction."

Colby nods, "That's why I'm super thankful we came a day early. Just so we can rest up and really prepare ourselves for this."

You go back to reading.

'What would you say to anyone who plans on going to see the house for themselves? Would you try to persuade them from going?'

'Personally..' Darion starts, "..I wouldn't necessarily try to persuade anyone from going, because at the end of the day, if they really want to go, they're going to go. So what I'd say, is go in there with an open mind. Don't expect the worst right off the bat because if you do, you'll get the worse right off the bat. Treat the ground you walk on with as much respect as you humanly can and don't, don't underestimate the spirits that are trapped in that house - especially the barn.'

You lock your phone and look out the window. You don't really say much because of not only being tired, but because you're really thinking about whether or not you want to go.

You wanted to go, of course, but you didn't want to put the burden of being worried about onto Sam and Colby, considering they'll already be worried about each other.

You reach the hotel and make your way inside to check in before going up to the room. You sit down on the bed and fall back, "Finally."

Colby laughs, sitting down and falling back onto the bed next to you, "Tell me about it."

Sam sits down on the other bed and falls back, "So who's sleeping where?"

"I could honestly fall asleep right here." Colby laughs slightly. You nod, "Same." Sam sits up and goes to his backpack, "I forgot. We have to do the backstory stuff."

Colby sits up, "Oh shit, that's right." He gets up, moving over to the other bed, right in front of where Sam set the camera up.

You heave yourself forward with a groan and stand up slowly. You walk over, moving onto the bed behind them.

Sam looks back at you, "You can lay down if you want."

You shake your head, "I'm good."

Colby laughs and looks at you, "You just want to say that spook-tacular line don't you?" You roll your eyes as you laugh, looking at him with a serious look, "Maybe."

He laughs and looks forward as Sam gets the camera on. Sam sighs, "we made it to the hotel." He motions around before clapping his hands together, "We are about an hour and a half, two hours give or take, away from the Missouri Farmhouse."

He motions towards Colby and Colby takes over, "So the Missouri Farmhouse was known for a few things. One thing being that it was owned by two of the richest people in this town at the time, Arlon and Cordelia Wheeler. Second thing, the barn right behind the house."

Sam looks from Colby to you, "Y/n, you were reading up on it on the way here, why don't you fill everyone in?"

You nod, slightly shifting to face the camera, "So over the last few days and even today, I've been reading different articles pertaining to the house itself and the barn." You pull up your phone, unlocking it, "The barn is where a brothel was held for a few years. Multiple people from this town, and even family members to both Arlon and Cordelia, would come and pay them to engage in sexual activity with, as the article stated, naive prostitutes that Cordelia would pick up from town and bring back."

You look at Sam and he smirks slightly, "Keep going."

You smile and shake your head, "Not only did the sexual activity take place, but the same prostitutes would then be sacrificed to bring good fortune to the very greedy couple, and to also try and bring a miracle, or whatever of fertility onto Cordelia."

"Oh yeah, they didn't have any children." Colby snaps and looks at Sam, "I read that they tried multiple times, but nothing worked so I think it was a cousin, maybe, of Cordelia who was big into secretly doing witchcraft, that told her about the human sacrifice thing and yeah."

"So it was the cousin of Cordelia that started it all?" Sam asks and Colby nods, "I'd say so. Because what I was reading, they convinced her, promised her safety after she made a deal with the devil I guess and that's when they started sacrificing everyone, but I don't know how they could have saved her from everything."

Colby shrugs, "Bottom line, this place isn't going to be like any other place we've stepped foot into before."

"Oh!" You snap your fingers, "I also read some other investigator's personal experiences and the one got shoved, knock over on to the ground hard and the other one I read, she had two.. not one, but two scratches on her back.. and they were bleeding."

"I just hope that we leave with our skin in tact." Sam rubs his arms and Colby looks over at him, "I think I would rather leave unpossessed or something of that matter."

He laughs and Sam nods, "Yeah." He laughs, "You have a point with that one." He claps his hands, "Let's just hope that we all leave the same way we go in."

Colby and you nod and he looks back at you, "Anything else you want to add in?"

You stare at him and sigh, "We'll see you tomorrow on this spook-tacular adventure."

Sam and Colby cheer and Sam reaches up to turn off the camera, "That was great. I love that." He looks back at you and you laugh, "alright. I'm going for a shower."

You grab stuff from your suitcase and walk into the bathroom.

Once you're done, you come out to both Sam and Colby asleep on the same bed in positions they probably were expecting to fall asleep in.

You pull out your phone, recording as you walk over to them, "This is how I found them when I came out from the bathroom."

You zoom in on Sam, "I don't know how that's comfortable." You move over to Colby and quietly laugh, "again, I don't even know how that's comfortable."

You stop recording and tap Sam's knee, "Hey." He opens his eyes and smiles up at you, "Hey." You laugh and motion to his position, "How is that comfortable?"

He sits up, almost falling off the bed completely, "I honestly don't even know." He looks over at Colby, "Is he kneeling on the floor?"

You nod, drying your hair with the towel, "That he is." You toss the towel onto the floor and walk over to Colby, "Hey, Colbs." You tap his shoulder and he snorts, "Huh?"

You smile, "I think lying in the bed will be more comfortable.." you laughs slightly, "Better for your knees."

He laughs as he pushes himself back from the bed, "You would know."

Your jaw drops, "Hey now. I've never fell asleep like that." He glances up at you, a smirk comfortable on his lips, "Wasn't talking about that."

You roll your eyes, "Keep it up and you won't know." You make a face at him, smiling as he shakes his head, "Don't say that."

You hold your hands up, "Sorry." You go to walk to the other bed but Sam stops you, "whatcha doin'?"

"Going to bed." You point and pull the covers back. Sam pouts, "All alone?"

You smile at him and glance at Colby, "what? Are you scared or something?"

"Oh yeah, don't you see me shaking in my boots?" Colby pretends to shake and you laugh, "Fine. You've convinced me enough."

Sam grabs your hand and pulls you over him, laying you in the middle between him and Colby.

This wasn't anything new to you guys. You shared toddler beds as kids and it just stuck. You knew the moment you came to live with them that you liked them both.

They both seem to like you, and even though nothing is official, it just works for you guys.

Almost like a well oiled machine with no labels, all three of you just know.

"Goodnight." You roll onto your side and Sam turns the light beside the bed off, "Goodnight." He lays down next to you, laying his arm over your waist.

"Goodnight." Colby turns his light off and lays down facing you. He lays a hand on your hip and with them next to you, it doesn't take long for you to fall asleep at all.

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

You hear talking, but you try to ignore it as you don't really want to get up yet.

"Today is the day we go to the Missouri Farmhouse."

Your eyes snap open the instant those words leave Colby's lips. You lift your head, slowly looking around before sitting up.

"Oh, look. She's finally awake." Sam jokes and you cover your face with a pillow, "No." you groan, "I'm not ready."

Sam goes back to talking as you sneak away to get ready for the day. After a little bit you come back out and see Sam and Colby sitting on the bed talking.

"You still up for today?" Colby looks at you and you nod, "Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" You set your bag down and walk over, sitting in the chair across from them.

"Just making sure." He smiles and you nod, "I mean, I'm nervous, but I'm trying to shake that away."

"It's normal to be nervous, especially when investigating something like this." Sam starts, "You just need to go in there with knowing that you're in charge of yourself."

You let out a breath, "I'm just.." you shake your head, "When do we have to meet Trevor?"

"He said he'll meet us at noon, but if you want we can go get something to eat." Sam suggests and you nod, "Yes. Please, I'm starving."

You make your way out to the car, debating on whether or not you should tell them about the dream you had last night.

You didn't want to freak them out, but at the same time, it felt so real, like you need to tell them.

"Hey, so.." you start out, laughing slightly when Colby looks at you, "I had a weird dream last night, and I debated on not telling you but it was something about the house."

"The house?" Colby questions and you nod, "Yeah, the farmhouse."

"Do you mind if I record this?" Sam asks holding the camera up and you shake your head, "No because it might be a good thing if you do."

You wait for Sam to do his intro, "We are currently on our way to get something to eat before going to meet, Trevor. He's the owner of the Missouri Farmhouse, but first, y/n here told us that she had a dream about the house so I'm just going to let her take it away."

He turns the camera back to you and you sigh, "Okay, so first off I don't even remember falling asleep so that's kind of weird because usually I do, you know what I mean?"

Sam and Colby both nod and you nod back, "Okay, so once the dream started, it was us, standing on the front porch of the house, it's nighttime mind you."

"Extra creepy." Sam laughs and you nod, "Oh yeah. Definitely. So we go in, and for what ever reason, Colby wanted to split up and I just had this absolute gut feeling that we shouldn't. So I kept telling him no, Colby. No we can't split up and he like got, I don't even want to say mad because it was worse than that."

"Almost like something took over him?" Sam asks and you hear Colby whine from the drivers seat, "Why me!?"

You shrug as Sam puts the camera back on you, "That's what I'm saying, like you were told that you were intimidating to the ghosts, and Sam.. well.." you laugh and he moves the camera to frown into it.

"Anyway, so we stick together, but there's all these shadow things moving around and at this point in the dream, I've had enough I want to go home, I'm clinging to Sam.." you see his lips form into a smirk and you try not to smile, ".. screaming to let me go let me go."

You point to Sam, "You, Sam, You're just looking around, watching these things fly and move around us and then all of a sudden everything goes dark, it feels like you're pulled away from me. I'm pushed backwards, and then I woke up. I don't know what time I woke up, but you guys were still asleep and it was still dark out."

Colby glances back at you in the rearview, giving you a why didn't you wake us up? look.

You frown slightly and sigh, "So I don't know if that has anything to do with what we're about to experience or what but it kinda has me shaking a little bit."

"I honestly don't even know what to say to that." Sam laughs slightly, "We wanted to record that just in case anything like that happens tonight at the actual farmhouse, so."

Sam turns the camera to Colby, "Click that like button if you think it will happen and hit that subscribe button if you think it won't." Colby smirks and winks into the camera and Sam smiles as he nods his head, "I see what you did there. Nice."

You laugh and lean back against the seat, your dream replaying in your mind over and over again as you make your way to the restaurant.

After lunch, you guys head to meet Trevor and Colby starts recording as Sam takes a turn driving.

"We are now on our way to meet up with Trevor. He's going to give us the whole run down." Sam looks over at the camera and back to the road, "My hands are sweaty. I'm actually getting more anxious the closer we get to going to the house, you know?"

"No, man. I know what you mean." Colby laughs and nods. You lean over, "We can just pull up to it, you know. Snap a few pictures then leave, I mean we can still say we seen it, right?" You laugh nervously and sigh, "Fuck. I cannot believe we're doing this."

"Well, believe it. We're here." Sam pulls into a driveway and Colby leans forward, "This doesn't look like the Missouri Farmhouse."

Sam starts laughing, "That's because this is Trevor's house, you fuckin' dummy."

You lay your hand over your mouth and Colby sighs as he nods, "Yeah.." He looks down at the camera and nods, "Okay." He turns it off and looks at Sam, "Thanks for embarrassing me, Sam."

"You did that yourself." Sam laughs and gets out, opening your door for you, "Ready?" You look up at him as he shuts the door, "Yeah. Let's go get some more horrific information." Colby walks around the car and stands next to you, "Did he say if it's alright to record this?"

Sam shakes his head, "I'm going to ask him."

You follow them to the door and Sam knocks. A few seconds later, the door opens and what you assume, Trevor smiles, "Hey, Sam?" He holds his hand out to Sam and he takes it, "Yes sir, I'm Sam." He points to Colby, "That's Colby."

"Hey, how are you?" Colby shakes his hand and steps out of the way as he motions to you, "This is y/n." You step up and shake his hand, "Hi. How are you?"

Trevor nods, "I'm good." He smiles, "I'm good. Please.." He steps out of the way and motions for you all to come in. You walk in, followed by the boys and Trevor closes the door, "So what do you want to know?"

"Oh before we start, do you mind if we film this for our video?" Sam holds up the camera and Trevor shakes his head, "Not a problem at all, whatever you need." He takes you guys into his dining room and Sam sets up the camera so you're all in frame.

"These look.. old." Colby reaches out and slides a paper over towards him, "What are these names?" He looks up at Trevor and Trevor sits down, "So this right here." He points to the paper in front of Colby, "We think these are the names of the prostitutes that were taken to the house."

"Like the ones that were sacrificed?" You lean over and look at the paper. Trevor nods, "Yes. We think this was kept by Cordelia as a way for her to have leverage over Arlon."

"Almost like blackmail?" Sam asks as he looks up and Trevor nods, "Exactly. Now these.." He opens a manilla folder and slides papers next to each other, "Lean in and read this. Tell me what you think it is."

All of you lean in, eyes scanning over the semi blurred words that read;

By signing this, you have gradually acquiesced to the demands of our leader, A.W. You must now obey order. If orders are not obeyed, there will be acts of retribution.

A.W. C.W

"Was this like a contract or something? Something that the women were, I'm assuming, forced to sign so they couldn't run and tell the truth about what was happening?" You ask as you look up at him.

Trevor nods, leaning back in his seat, "Precisely."

"Its such a short contract." Colby shakes his head, "But it actually worked? Like it was a valid thing?" Trevor shrugs, "I don't think there was such thing as a notary back then, but with enough people believing in Arlon, I'm sure that didn't make much of a difference."

"Can we take a picture of this name list? Just so we know who to try and talk to?" Colby taps his finger next to the paper and Trevor nods, "Oh yeah, of course. Take a picture of it all if you'd like."

Colby works on taking pictures while you and Sam talk to Trevor, "Can you tell us about any personal experiences that you or anyone else close to you have had?" Sam asks resting his elbows on the table.

Trevor blows out air, "Gosh, I don't even know where to start." He chuckles and you sit up more, "What about the girl that got scratched so bad she bled?"

Trevor's eyes widen as he nods, "Oh shit. Yeah. The panic in her voice when I got the call about them leaving, was not a call I wanted to receive at two a.m."

You nod, "Oh I can imagine. I was reading up on the house over the last few days, and some of the stuff I've read is just.. horrifying."

Trevor nods, "They're not exaggerating it at all, either. The barn, that's where everything was held for a majority of its time. That is where most of the crazy shit happens."

He shuffles through the folder and slides over a blown up picture of a wooden beam sticking straight up out of the ground, "My brothers and I were working on patching up some of the holes in the roof of the barn one day when I suddenly got this really bad, dizzy feeling. I stepped, maybe three steps, and that beam fell straight down onto the exact spot I was standing."

You all look at Trevor in shock and he nods, "Another time, I was in the house looking around to see what we could really remodel. I was standing on the stairs and it honestly felt like someone was trying to throw me over the banister."

"What the hell." Colby shakes his head, holding up hid pointer finger, "Note to self. don't stand too close to the stairs banister."

You and Sam laugh and Trevor nods, "Another don't you should follow." He looks between the three of you, "If you go into Arlon and the wife's room, don't let the door close on you."

"I know.. I'm probably going to regret asking this.." Sam sighs, "Why?"

"I've never had it happen to me, I even went there to see for myself, but I've had multiple reports about some crazy shit happening if you let the door close. For instance." He sits forward, "Someone called me and told me that their hearing.." He puts air quotes, "Stopped working."

"Oh shit." Colby shakes his head, "Almost like they isolated them." Trevor nods, "Yeah, they also said that they've heard things being screamed into their ear. They could never tell me what they heard. Every time they thought about it, it was on the tip of their tongue but they just couldn't ever say it."

"Now that is really freaking weird." Sam shivers, "I have the goosebumps just thinking about that, like being the only one in a room, a dark room at that, and just having something scream shit into your ear that you definitely make out, but you forget about it even though you know it? Does that make sense?"

You nod, "That would drive me absolutely insane." You lean back, stretching your arms out behind you.

"Did you get pictures of everything?" Sam asks Colby and he nods, "Yes, I did. I'll send them to both of you, just in case something happens to my phone." He sends out the pictures to you and Colby and you swipe through them as they finish up talking.

"Thank you so much for meeting with us." Colby holds his hand out to shake Trevor's hand again, "We truly appreciate all the information." Trevor shakes his hand then moves onto Sam's, "Not a problem at all. Again, call if you need anything and just be cautious around and in the barn if you do go in. You never know what can happen."

You nod and walk over to the door with them, "Wait." You turn to Trevor, "You told Sam on the phone that I shouldn't come? Why is that?"

"I found that the females that come to the house are targeted the most, probably out of the dead being jealous of the living." Trevor opens the door, "Just be extra careful, sweetheart. The pretty ones get more attention."

"Oh.. Okay. Thanks." You look from Trevor and Sam and Colby are both staring at you, "Again. Thank you for the information." Colby walks out, stopping to wait for you.

Trevor hands Sam the key, "This will open the front door. Call if you need anything."

"Thank you." Sam grabs the key, "I'll be sure to let you know how it goes." He lays a hand on your back as you walk in front of him.

"Good luck." Trevor yells before closing the door.

You get in the car after Sam open's your door, "He was fine up until the very end. I didn't like that." Colby looks back at you, "I don't think he meant it in the way that we took it, bu-"

Sam cuts him off, "I still didn't like it."

You laugh slightly, "It's fine. We have something bigger to worry about now." You take a deep breath, "The Missouri Farmhouse."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

"Stop here so we can get a shot of the entrance." Colby points and you lean around, "That's actually very fucking creepy."

Colby nods, "I know, all of the trees and then just this dirt, gravel road." he rolls his window down and holds the camera out, recording as Sam drive onto the long driveway.

Your heart drops into your stomach as the house comes into view.

"There she be." Sam says and you shake your head, "I already don't like this." You laugh nervously and Colby puts the camera on you, "You nervous or something?"

You roll your eyes and clear your throat, "What? Me? No. Not at all." You look at him serious, "Yeah, very much actually."

Colby laughs and turns the camera to Sam, "Well, brother. Now that were here.. how are you feeling?" Sam parks and takes a deep breath, "I honestly don't know." He laughs and looks over, "Y/n's dream kind of has me freaked out."

"Tell me about it." You run a hand through your hair, staring at the house as Colby records it, "Well, guys. This is .. The Missouri Farmhouse."

"We are going to get our things together and we will take you guys on a tour before it gets dark out, just so you can all see how old this house really is." Sam looks into the camera and Colby tilts his head, "You mean to show them how creepy this place actually is?"

Sam nods, "Same thing." He laughs as he turns the car off. Colby shuts the camera off and gets out, opening your door for you. You move at a slow pace, not rushing to get inside. You slip on your jacket, "How cold is it supposed to get?"

"I believe low forties." Sam says as he pops the trunk. You nod as you pull the hood from your sweatshirt out of the back of your jacket. Colby walks up next to you, "You ready?"

"As I can be." You smile up at him and he lays a hand on your hip, "At anytime-"

"You tell me this every time I do an investigation with you guys, and you know that if I absolutely cannot handle it anymore, I'll tell you." You smirk as he smiles and nods, "Just like to remind you."

"I appreciate that." You smile and turn to look at Sam, "So were just going to do a walk through?" He nods, "Yeah, I figured that with it still being daylight, we can get footage of how everything looks normal because I honestly feel everything is going to intensify when the sun goes down."

Colby puts his jacket on and sighs, "Ready?"

You and Sam look at him with a nod, "Ready."

Sam starts rolling, "Alright guys. So we are on our way into the house. This is what it looks like on the outside." Sam turns the camera around, panning it over the huge farmhouse standing before you.

You walk up to the door and Sam hands Colby the camera as he pulls the key from his pocket. He slips the key into the old looking lock and turns it, "Alright." Sam looks back as the door cracks open, "We're in."

"No going back now." Colby chuckles and hands the camera back to Sam so he can walk in first. You follow, Colby right behind you.

You trip on the step and fall into Sam, "I tripped." You announce quickly, "Sorry."

"You okay?" He turns around, laying a hand on your side and you nod, laughing slightly, "Yeah. I'm good." You look away from Sam, eyes scanning over the house.

Sam pans the camera around, "It's so old, yet so beautiful."

"Whoa, look at this." Colby walks over and Sam follows him. Colby points to a portrait on the wall, it's old and kind of ripped, "I think this is Arlon and Cordelia."

As Sam and Colby are talking about the portrait, you get this unsettling feeling that you're being watching, "Guys.." your voice is almost inaudible.

You reach out, tapping Colby's arm and he turns around, "Did you just- what's wrong?"

"Something is watching us." You swallow and turn around.

A shadow moves from the top corner of the doorway and you point, "That door. There was something in the top corner."

"Oh fuck." Sam walks in front of you, camera pointed at the door, "what did it look like?" He looks back at you and you shrug, "It was just a shadow, like a head shaped shadow."

"Jesus Christ." Colby shakes his head, "So we won't be going that way." He laughs and points the other way. You nod, "Yeah, that room.. gives me a bad feeling."

"What kind of feeling?" Sam looks at you and you take a breath, "Dark, evil kind of feeling."

Sam and Colby just stare at you for a second, "Okay." Sam says breaking the silence, "Moving away from that room."

You walk down the hall, staying as close as you can to them while holding your arms around yourself. Sam and Colby explain some backstory while you can't help but continuously look around like someone else is there.

"So there's what? Two three floors to this?" Colby asks.

"Three, but the third is the attic, but I guess it's huge." Sam answers. He looks over at you, "What's going on?"

You shake your head, "It doesn't feel like we're alone. Like don't you feel that weird feeling like someone is standing like right.." you wave your hand up and down behind Sam, "Here."

Sam turns around as Colby walks over, standing right where you motioned to, "Here you said?"

You nod and Colby looks at Sam, "I don't feel-" he moves back, "Whoa." He looks around quick and moves to stand next to you, "swear to god something just pushed me."

"We saw it." Sam looks from you to Colby, "Are you okay?" You lay your hand on his arm, "You were pushed backwards, so whatever that was, it was between us."

"Fuck." Colby shakes his head, "Do you still feel like someone else is here?"

You take a deep breath, shaking your head, "No. it vanished right as you got pushed."

"You moved next to y/n. What if they think that we're trying to -" Sam puts air quotes, "-protect her?" He shrugs, "I mean, we were told that they'll go after her more because she's a girl and the spirits can have some sort of jealousy towards her."

You shiver slightly, "That just send a chill down my spine, Sam. That's honestly so bizarre to hear out loud."

You snap your head to the left, eyes focused on the staircase, "shh." You hold your hand out, frozen for a second until you look at Sam, "There was walking, like heavy footsteps on the stairs."

There's a sudden loud thump only a few feet away from you that causes you all to jump and yell out, "Oh shit."

"What the fuck!?"

"Goddammit."

It happens again, and this time you jump towards Colby, grabbing onto his arm as you look at Sam, "What the hell was that?"

He shrugs, "I don't know but we should keep moving." He nods towards the hall and you and Colby follow him, making sure to stay extra close to them.

They continue talking about the place, making sure to give you reassuring glances every so often as you explore the rest of the house.

Soon enough, you're face to face with the barn.

"I mean.." Colby starts out as he takes the camera from Sam, "It doesn't really look all the scary in the daylight."

Sam laughs slightly, "It looks, kind of pretty with the light shining down through the beams."

You get dizzy, and it happens quick.

"Oh god." You mumble as you hold your head. Sam is right next to you, arm around your waist and you lean into him.

"What's going on?" Colby asks confused and you feel Sam shrug. You take a deep breath, slowly lifting your head, "I got, really dizzy."

Sam looks up at Colby and back to you, "Are you still dizzy?" You can tell there's concern in his voice, "Do you need to sit down?"

You shake your head, blinking a few times, "No. I think I'm okay." You brush hair from your face, eyes moving past Colby to look into the death filled barn, "That's not a good place."

Colby turns around, pointing the camera at the entrance, "If you wouldn't know anything about this place, it honestly looks like a normal barn that was abandoned, you know?"

Sam nods, arm still around you, "I'm actually kind of scared for when the sun goes down."

Colby nods, "I'm sure we're all feeling that way." He looks at you then to Sam, "I'm going to walk up, get a shot of the inside, you guys stay here."

"Colby." Sam warns, "I wouldn't."

"Yeah, don't go up there alone, please." You practically beg. Colby shrugs, "I'll be fine, I'll just run up and run back."

You tighten your grip on Sam's jacket as you watch Colby walk up towards the barn. You were preparing yourself to run and help him.

You had to be on your toes while here, this place is so unpredictable.

"Yo Colby." Sam yells, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I got it." Colby yells back, "Coming."

Your eyes are focused on Colby as he walks towards you and Sam, glancing behind him every so often. He wants up, pointing his thumb behind him, "It sounded like someone, you know those loft spaces in a barn where they store the hay?"

You and Sam nod and Colby looks back before continuing, "It sounded like someone was up there, scuffling around."

"That's not surprising. That's the most active spot out of everything." Sam shakes his head, "alright. So I'm thinking we go get something to eat, calm our nerves and really prepare for what we're going to be facing tonight."

Colby nods, "That's a good idea." His head snaps towards the house, "There's no fucking way."

"What?" Sam takes the camera, "What happened?"

You stay close to Sam, looking to where Colby is staring, "Did you hear something?"

"It sounded like someone yelled back here in the distance, like they were telling someone to get back here? You know what I mean?" He looks at Sam, "We're the only ones out here right?"

"We should be." Sam pans the camera around the old farm, "Take one last look, because when we get back. Everything will be engulfed with darkness."

"Isn't it already?" Colby asks, "With the spirits and all of that?"

Sam sighs, "I mean. Yeah, I guess. But I was trying to make it thrilling." He pouts and shuts the camera off as you and Colby laugh.

"Let's go take a minute." Sam lays his hand on your lower back, "We can go over the plan of where we want to start and where we want to end while we wait for the sun to go down."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

After dinner, you're in the car heading back to the farmhouse and you can't shake the nervous feeling.

All of the news articles pop back up into your head, flipping through like pages in a book.

"Y/n?" Colby's voice makes you jump, "Fuck." You laugh slightly, "Sorry. I was thinking about everything I read."

"Yeah, us too." Colby looks to Sam and back to you, "If things go south, we're getting out of there. No questions asked, no it'll be good content, nothing."

You nod, "Deal."

"If you at anytime don't feel like you can do it anymore.." Sam starts, "Same for you Colby, we're done."

Colby nods and you sit up, "I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that that girl had blood drawn."

"Spirits are powerful things, y/n. If they don't like you, they'll make it known." Colby quickly sighs, "Sorry. I wasn't thinking. I know that's probably something you don't want to hear after-"

"No, Colby." You lay your hand on his shoulder, "You're fine. I'm fine. We're all going to be fine."

You lean back, taking a deep breath as you see a familiar sign that lets you know you're almost to the beginning of the dirt road.

"We're almost there." Sam says, "Do you want to get the camera out Colby? We need to get a shot of this." He motions to the windshield, and you look out at the dark road that's only lit by the headlights of the car.

"Oh fuck me." You breathe out, laying a hand on your forehead, "This is sketchy as hell."

"I'm going to stop and turn the lights off." Sam comes to a slow stop, looking over at Colby, "Ready?"

Colby nods, "Rolling." He points the camera forward and Sam flicks the lights off, leaving the three of you in total darkness.

"Oh m- that is fucking scary." Colby laughs, "What the hell."

"Now imagine I turn the lights on and there's something just sta-"

"Sam!" You yell, tapping his shoulder, "Don't say that!" You laugh, "I'm already peeing my pants back here."

"Are you really?" Sam teases. Even thought you can't see him, you can tell he turns around and you scoff, "No, not really."

He flicks the lights back on and thankfully there's nothing there. You let out a sigh of relief as Sam starts driving again.

Sam and Colby go back and forth about the darkness, laughing and joking like they normally do. You weren't sure if it was your dream keeping a tight hold on you, or the fact that you're a girl going to this no girls allowed club, or what.

But you were scared, and you knew that you had to pretend that you weren't and it was going to be hard.

"Alright." Sam taps the wheel, "We meet again."

"The sun going down has definitely amplified the creepiness by a thousand times." Colby adds, "I have goosebumps."

Your eyes stay on the house and you squint, "Did you guys light that candle when we were in there?"

"What?" Colby turns around and Sam comes to a stop, "I didn't light anything."

You look back up at the house and the light you thought you seen wasn't there anymore, "It's not.. maybe it was just the headlights."

"I wouldn't be surprised if anything was on in there, so maybe you did see something lit." Sam assures you, "Let's get everything ready and take final minute before going in."

Colby shuts the camera off and gets out with Sam. You sit there for a moment before Sam opens your door, leaning down to look at you, "You okay?"

You turn your head to look at him, "Yeah. Yeah. Just taking a minute for myself." You slide over, swinging your legs out, "I'm ready."

You look up at Sam and he grips your chin, "That's our girl." He winks and helps you get out, closing your door behind you.

You walk around, grabbing your backpack from the trunk. You make sure you have everything that you planned on taking, along with the boys.

"I'm good." Sam says zipping up his backpack.

Colby nods, swinging his around to put his arms through the straps, "Me too."

"Yep. Let's go." You put your backpack on and step back so Colby can shut the trunk. He sets the camera on top and turns it on.

He back up, standing on the other side of you, "We are here."

"It's dark." Sam adds before Colby picks up, "It's finally time to explore the famous Missouri Farmhouse."

You look around, nothing but the light from the camera illuminating the short distance around you.

"Did you hear something?" Sam looks at you and you look at him, "No. I'm just looking around." You laugh and look at the camera.

"So we came up with a game plan of where we want to go first, and where we want to go last." Sam claps his hands together, "We all agreed that the barn is the last place we want to go, so stay tuned for that and we'll see you in a second."

Colby walks up, cutting the camera, "alright. Let's head up."

As you walk up to the house, you look behind you, squinting at the sight of a possible figure standing still at the back of the car.

You blink and it's gone.

You shake your head, looking forward as you're met with the farmhouse door. You look up, turning to look out into the darkness.

Colby opens the door and walks on, Sam lays a hand on your back, nudging you slightly so you walk in.

I'm not scared, you think, mind over matter. I'm not scared.

The camera light shines on the dark interior and Colby bumping into you causes you to jump, "Colby!" You yell quietly with a laugh.

"Sorry. Sorry." He laughs and lays a hand on your shoulder. Sam spins around, pointing the camera on you and him, "should we bring out the Epoch box?"

"Yes. That's a good start." Colby says, "Do you have it or do I?"

"I think you do." He points to Colby and Colby nods, "Okay." He pulls his backpack off and you wrap your arms around yourself, feeling a chill creep down between the multiple layers of clothing.

You let out a sigh, stepping closer to Sam.

"You alright?" He whispers looking over at you. You nod, "Just cold. I got a chill standing over there."

"I'll get this thing going." Colby stands up, walking over to the small end table, "So this is called the Epoch box. It isn't motion censored, but it's similar to the Ovilus as it uses a sophisticated algorithm to read the environment and converts the energy into yes or no responses."

"I'm Sam, these are my friends Colby and y/n. We're here to ask some questions and with those we come in peace. We mean absolutely no harm to anyone here so if it's okay with you.." he pauses, looking between you and Colby, "Can we ask you some questions?"

The box flickers a few times before lighting up green for a few seconds then stops.

"Okay. Is Arlon here with us?" Sam keeps the camera on the box as you all wait.

The box lights up red for a few seconds before shutting off. It flickers before going dark and you sigh, "I'm y/n. I mean no harm to anyone here." You step forward, "Is this Cordelia?"

The box flickers before lighting up green for a few seconds.

"So it's her." You look at Sam and then to Colby and he nods. He looks down at the box and furrows his brows, "Sam."

"What?" Sam walks over, making sure you go with him, "did it just turn off?" Sam looks up at Colby with a shocked expression.

Colby lifts it, "That says on, right?"

"So it.. what? Died?" Sam asks confused, "what the fuck?"

A loud thump makes you jump and you look behind you. It catches Sam and Colby's attention too because they turn after you, "What was that?" Colby whispers, "Sounded like a-"

Thump!

"That." You point, "That sounds-"

Thump! Thump!

"Okay." Sam sighs, "Lets move to the den area." Sam lays his hand on your back and turns back to Colby, "Just switch it off. Maybe we can get it to work somewhere else."

Colby nods, picking it up, "You said the den area?" Sam nods and Colby pulls out his phone. Sam looks at you and you look at him, shrugging before both looking back to Colby.

He holds his phone up, "I knew I remember seeing something about a den. Look." He shows you and Sam his phone and you nod, "so he had favorites."

"Looks like it to me." Sam says as he shows the camera Colby's phone, "Hold on, I'm trying not to get a gla- oh here we go."

Colby puts his phone in his pocket and sighs, "So. To the den we go?"

"The den we go." Sam nods before you all walk towards the end of the hall. Colby opens the door, announcing that it's you guys before walking in.

You get a weird feeling, almost like you're uncomfortable.

You shift around, pulling down your sweatshirt and jacket, "This room feels.. uncomfortable." You look at them, "Like I think I can tell what happened here just by how I'm feeling."

"If he had favorites, I'm sure we can all figure out what happened in this room." Colby points to you, "Do you want to leave? Are you okay?"

You shake your head, "No, I think I'll be fine. Do you have any names?" Colby pulls his phone back out and nods, "Edith Macentire, Daisy Lovell, Lydia?" he zooms in and shakes his head, "I can't read the last one."

"I'll get out the REM pod." Sam hands the camera to Colby before swinging his backpack off. He gets out the pod and looks around, "I'm not going to put it by the door, I'll put it.." he walks over to the small stand that's in front of the window and sets it down.

"Hello, I'm Sam. Just want to ask you a few questions, I mean no harm. I just want to try and figure out what happened in here." He gently claps his hands together, "there's a light on that pod there, if you get close enough to it, a light will flash. If you want to answer any questions, all you have to do is just make that light up, okay?"

A few minutes goes by before the light turns on.

"Okay. Is this Edith Macentire?" Sam keeps his eyes on the pod, "Just touch it once for yes or-"

The light flashes once time and turns off. Sam looks back at you and Colby, "Edith, did bad things happen in this room?"

The pod lights up one time and you move your hand to tap Colby, "don't we have a spirit box?" He nods, "Yeah." You look at Sam and back to Colby, "I think we should use it. I just feel like we need it right now."

"Okay." Colby nods, "I think it's in your bag." Sam walks up behind you and the REM pod goes off constantly.

Sam leans out from behind you, "What the fuck." Colby shrugs, looking back at him, "I don't know, man." Colby keeps the camera on the pod as Sam walks over, "I'm going to shut this off." Sam grabs the REM pod and holds it in his arm as he sets the little radio box on the stand, "You will be able to tell us things through this."

Sam step back, taking the camera from Colby so he can move up, "I'm Colby, I mean absolutely no harm, neither do my friends. Can you tell us what happened in this room?"

The static sounds for a few minutes, "..Man.."

"Man?" Colby questions, "Are you talking about Arlon?"

"..Evil!.."

"Arlon was an evil man." Sam shakes his head, "Are we still talking to Edith?" The static plays in the silence for a minute longer, "..Lydia.."

"Lydia. Can you tell us what the evil man did?" Colby rests his fingers on his chin as he watches the box, "..he said.. wouldn't die.."

"Did he tell them that they wouldn't die?" Sam whispers and you nod, "I think that's what she means. Maybe he promised them a good life since he was-"

Your words are cut short by the box, ".. he wants you.."

Your eyes go wide and your heart sinks into your stomach, "Huh?" Colby looks at you, Sam, then back to the box, "Who wants who, Lydia?"

You can feel your heart starting to race and it feels like something is creeping up behind you. You glance behind you, seeing nothing as you move closer to Sam.

Sam looks down at you and wraps his arm around your shoulder as he holds the camera on Colby. Colby shake his head, "I think she's gone."

Instantly after Colby stops talking, "..run!"

You feel a gently tug on your jacket before it feels like a yank and you're pulled from Sam, both of you yelling at the same time. He grabs your arm pulling you back to him as Colby comes over, "What the fuck just happened?"

You cling to Sam as he hands the camera to Colby. Colby keeps the camera pointed down, "Sam wh-"

"..I told you.."

Colby walks over, shutting off the box, "Okay that's enough for now." He walks back over, camera still down at your guy's feet , "Are you okay?"

You keep your head pressed against Sam's chest, "When it said he wants you.. I got this feeling that there was something, I don't know." You sigh, "Creeping up behind me and then right after run was said, I got yanked backwards."

"I don't.." Colby shakes his head, letting out a sigh, "I don't want to say anything, but I know we're all thinking it.."

"He wants her." Sam says nodding down to you. Colby nods, "Mhm." You lift your head from Sam's chest and sigh as you try not to laugh, "This is insane."

Sam takes the camera back and you walk towards Colby, taking a deep breath, "Okay. Where to next?"

Colby smiles slightly and shakes his head, "You want to keep going?" You nod, "I'm not tapping out yet."

"We hit two of three places down here, I don't really want to go into that room she saw the shadow figure in. Not at night, gives me a very bad feeling." Sam says and you nod, "So, upstairs then?"

"I think we should go into Arlon and Cordelia's room." Colby raises his brows and you nod, "Just please don't let the door shut."

You make your way out of the den and into the hallway. Colby shuts the door and you all freeze as you hear something in the hallway.

You wait a few seconds before starting to walk, "So.." Colby says to the camera, "We are currently making our way up to the bedroom that housed the ring leaders to this whole shabang."

You laugh slightly, "Shabang." Sam smirks and Colby rolls his eyes as he chuckles.

Each creek of the stairs is unsettling to you. You're jumpy, really jumpy. So every little sound causes your body to feel like you're going to jump out of your skin.

"Alright." Sam breathes out, "We have reached Arlon and Cordelia's humble abode." He takes a deep breath, "We should find something heavy to put in front of the door so that way if it moves we can hear it."

Colby reaches for the handle, looking between you and Sam, "Ready?" You and Sam both nod and you walk up behind Colby as he pushes the door open slowly, "Okay. I don't see any-"

Something falls right into the door way and you gasp while jumping back. Sam groans, "Jesus Christ." Colby squeezes his eyes shut and open them, "I may have peed a little bit."

You look down and step towards Sam, "Oh gross."

"I didn't.. actually.." Colby sighs and shakes his head, "Let's just go in." Colby steps in and turns around, "The atmosphere in here is.. different."

You walk in and look at Colby, "You're right." Sam follows you and looks around, "That's actually super fucking crazy."

Colby keeps his hand on the door while you look for something kind of heavy, "Would this work? If we just pull this over in front of it?" You point to a small table and he shrugs, "I can stay by the door just in case."

You push the small table over, freezing as you hear footsteps in the hall.

"Did those come from up here or down there?" Sam whispers and Colby shrugs, shaking his head, "I-I don't-"

What sounds like running in the hall causes you and Sam to move by Colby. Sam leans forward, aiming the camera into the darkened passage, "I don't see any-"

"Did that just move?" You say cutting Sam off as you point to the bed, "The blanket. Wasn't that tucked up by the pillows nice and neat when we came in?"

"I have no idea, I didn't really look." Sam says, "It could have-" he tells jumping slightly, "Fuck."

"What what what!?" Colby yells quickly, "you good?!"

Sam nods, "Yeah, just something like drug up the back of my leg."

"Do you feel like you're scratched?" You take the camera from him and he just stands there staring at the ground, "Sam." You snap your fingers and lean in to look at his face, "Sam. Hey."

He blinks as you wave your hand in front of his face and looks up at you, "No. I'm good."

You look at Colby and Colby shakes his head, "Where'd you go man?" He looks at Colby confused, "What do you mean? I've been right here."

You slowly shake your head, gasping loudly when you see something in the slightly dusty mirror, "Oh my god. The mirror." You aim the camera at it, the light from the camera reflecting off, "A woman, was just standing there."

"Cordelia?" Colby asks and you shrug as you look to Sam, "You with us?" You reach out, wrapping your hand around his wrist.

He slides his hand into yours and squeezes it, "Yeah, no. I just. I'm dizzy. Like really dizzy."

Colby lays a hand on your back, "Let's get out of this room." You hand Colby the camera as you guide Sam out. He walks over to the wall, resting his back against it and you look back at Colby, watching as he closes the door.

"Hey, you alright?" Colby asks walking up, "Did you see anything when you spaced out?"

Sam shakes his head, "No, I just couldn't look up from the floor." He runs a hand over his face, "I could hear you calling for me, but I just-"

"Frozen." You say and he nods, "Literally, yeah. That. I didn't hear anything other than you and Colby." You step towards him and lay your hand on his shoulder.

He tilts his head back, resting it against the glass, "I'm not dizzy anymore."

"Well that's good." Colby sighs, "do you need a water or anything?" Sam shakes his head, moving to stand up straight, "No, I'm alright."

You glance to Colby and he nods, "Let's take a minute. It's been a lot for all of us right now."

"No let's just keep going." Sam insists, "I'm fine."

Colby nods and you sigh quietly, "Okay. Where to next?" Sam points down the hall, "Arlon gave Cordelia an office like room to keep things organized, I guess. We can do that then we can go outside for a minute."

"Whatever you want to do, Sam." Colby says and Sam nods, "I'm good." He smiles, "I promise."

You nod, following him down the hall to one of the doors, "Okay, so." Sam points to the door and Colby shows it to the camera as Sam continues to speak, "This is where all of the information they could get about each prostitute was kept. Cordelia, Arlon's wife was in charge of getting them to come back here."

"Do you think she talked them up wherever she found them or kind of did like an interview situation?" You look from Sam to Colby and Colby points, "That's actually a really good point, we can get the spirit box or something out and ask."

"We can try the Epoch box again. See if downstairs was just a bad spot for it." Sam says before reaching for the doorknob, "it's just us again."

He steps in and turns around, making sure you're behind him. Colby follows and pans the camera around the room, "It really is like an old timey office."

"Look, this is that same list of names, do you think this is the original?" You move over to the desk, looking at the old looking piece of paper. Sam walks over and check it out, "This might be a copy? I mean, it looks pretty real to be a copy, so I don't know."

Colby moves over, shining the light from the camera over the page so you can see it better, "I wouldn't mess with it, you know just, to be on the safe side."

You nod and hold your hand up, "Do you hear that?" Sam and Colby look to you before turning towards the open door.

The sound of a door opening and shutting echos through the hallway.

"What door is that?" Colby whispers and Sam shrugs, "Could it be the bedroom?" Colby walks over, peaking out as he aims the camera.

He leans back in quickly and exhales, "Holy fucking shit." He looks to you and Sam, "Holy. Fucking shit."

"Did you see something?" Sam asks, "Colby. What did you see?"

"The door, to the bedroom, was cracked open and a shadow came up the steps and went into the room then it shut." Colby's breath is shaky.

"No fucking way." Sam lays a hand on his mouth, "Are you serious?" Colby nods, "Swear to fucking god, Sam. I'm not shitting you, it- here." He hands Sam the camera and reenacts what he saw, "It came up the steps like this, slow. Then just turned like this.." he turns his body, "And then just went into the room."

"Jesus Christ." Sam sighs and you lay your hand on your forehead. You feel like you're sweating, "Do you guys, feel.. hot?"

Sam turns to you, "Are you- what's going on?" He feels your forehead, "Colby, she's sweating."

"How? It's like forty degrees outside." He walks over to the other side of you and you lean against him, "I think we need to take a break." 

"Yeah. I agree." Sam nods, taking the camera from Colby before Colby wraps his arm around your waist, "Come on." He walks over to the door, looking out before rounding the corner with you.

The only light you have is from the camera that Sam has behind you. He pulls his phone out, switching on his flashlight as you reach the steps.

"Careful." Sam says as you and Colby step onto the first one. These steps were old, so you had to go up and down with care.

You reach the bottom as just as you are about to make it to the front door, it feels like something grabs your arm and tries to pull you away from Colby.

A faint, "Stay.." is whispered as you pull your arm back.

"Something just grabbed me and told me to stay. It was super quiet." You grip Colby's jacket and he opens the door, "You're good. We got you." 

He walks you outside and Sam shuts the door behind him with a loud, "Holy fuck."

"Yeah. Yeah." Colby nods as he walks you over to the car, "Here." He opens the door, "Sit for a second."

You sit down and let out a sigh, "Sam, are you okay?" You look up at him and he walks over to you, "Yes, sweetheart. I'm fine."

You smile slightly and nod, "Okay." He brushes hair from your face, "Are you?" You nod and he turns to Colby, "Are you okay?"

Colby nods, "Yeah." He shakes his head, "Maybe we should do a recap before anything else." Sam nods, looking back at you, "Stay here."

"You don't have to worry about that." You laugh slightly, watching as Sam walks to the back of the car. You rest your head against the seat, listening to them talk to the camera.

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

You stand up, slinging the back pack over your shoulder, "I know it wasn't really in the plan, but I think we should do the Estes method in between the barn and the house."

Colby looks between you and Sam, "Do you think that that's really a good idea?"

Sam puts his backpack on, moving his hood out, "I mean, it can't hurt to try. Two of us will be able to see and hear."

Colby shakes his head, "I don't know. This place just makes me nervous for something like that." Sam nods, "No I understand, but I was honestly going to say something about doing that too."

Colby chews on his cheek for a few seconds, "Who ever does it, has to be prepared, that's all I'm saying." Sam sighs, "Yeah, Colby. I know."

This place was doing something to them.

To all of you.

Tensions are usually never this high. You knew you all wanted to do this for the video, but you also knew that you all didn't really want to be there anymore.

"Let's just.." Colby sighs and you cut in, getting out of the car, "Let's just take it one step at a time because we really don't know what is going to happen."

"She's right." Sam says, we can just go back, maybe set up flashlights? I don't know where but we can try that?"

Colby nods, "Yeah." He grabs the camera, "Come on." He switches the camera on as you start to walk back towards the house.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

You all stop, looking at each other before the sound of something tapping against the glass catching your attention  again, tap. Tap. Tap.

"Okay.. that's freaky." Sam laughs slightly, "What window is it?" You shrug, "It sounds close." Your eyes scan over the windows that are lit up by the camera light.

You point to the middle window, "The curtains moved in that one." Colby steps towards the window, holding up the camera to see inside when all of a sudden he jumps back after a loud thump on the glass scares him.

"What the fuck!" He yells stepping back, "That was literally right fucking there."

"There's no way that wasn't on video. Holy shit." Sam walks up to the window and looks in, "I don't.. see.. anything.."

He shakes his head and looks back at you, "Lets go around to the back." You and Colby follow him as you walk around to the back.

Colby shines the camera over towards the bar, "There it is." He shivers slightly, "Just looking at it sends a shiver down my spine."

"So what do we want to do?" Sam asks as he looks between you and Colby. You shrug, "I'm all for doing the Estes method."

Sam nods and looks at Colby, "Colby?"

Colby sighs, "I guess we can do that, but who-"

"I'll do it." You raise your hand and they both just look at you with a solid look. Sam sighs, "We can all do it. Take turns."

"I'll go first." Colby says handing Sam the camera. Sam looks at him, "You sure?" Colby nods, swinging his back pack off, "Yeah."

You look at Sam and back to Colby, watching as he digs in his bag to pull out a bandana and the equipment.

You had an eerie feeling creeping in again, maybe it was just your nerves about doing this method with the barn right there.

"Okay. So are we thinking like right in the middle?" Colby asks and Sam reaches out, pointing to a specific spot, "Yeah I'm thinking something like right in here. It looks about halfway."

Colby sets his bag on the ground and sits down next to it. He takes a deep breath, "Okay." He wraps the bandana around his eyes and ties it behind his head.

Sam sets the camera down on top of his backpack, angling it so you're all in frame as you sit on either side of Colby.

Sam leans over, showing the camera how loud the static plays through the headphones. He hands them to Colby, "Here you go."

Colby takes them and puts them on, shaking his head slightly as he gets used to them, "Pain."

You look at Sam with your eyes wide, "What the fuck."

Sam shrugs, "I know you were and still are in a lot of pain. Can you tell my friend, Colby here who is talking to us."

Your eyes move to Colby as he tilts his head, "Why?"

"Are you asking us why we're here?" You ask and Colby answers, "Yes, why?"

"We're here to figure out what to the women Cordelia brought back to this farmhouse." Sam says and Colby taps his knee with his hand, "There was like.. a scream?"

"Who are we talking to?" Sam asks looking around, "Are we talking to one of the girls?"

"In the barn." Colby says, "He wants.. you in the barn."

"Who wants us in the barn?" You ask, "Does Arlon want us to come into the barn?"

"not all." Colby states, "Just one."

Sam points to you and you shake your head, "I'm not going in there alone. I'm not."

"Yes. You are."

As soon as the words leave Colby's lips, the hood on your sweatshirt is pulled back and you slam your hands behind you to catch yourself as you let out a scream, "What the fuck?"

Sam taps Colby and Colby pushes the headphones off, "Right before you tapped me, there was a deep, manly like laugh."

"Right after you said yes you are, she got pulled backwards." Sam looks over at you, "Are you okay?"

You nod, "Yeah." You sigh, "Yeah. That just, I let my guard down for a second." You run a hand through your hair and move closer to Colby, "That barn just.." you glance back at it and your eyes focus on the dark inside.

You can't tell if your brain is playing tricks, or if you actually see things moving.

You look away, trying to focus on Sam filling in Colby on what you and him asked, but you just can't seem to stay focused.

You rest your elbows on your knees, holding your face in your hands.

You feel Colby's hand on your shoulder, but you just can't acknowledge it. You take a deep breath and manage to lift your head, "I just.. couldn't get focused there for a second."

"You good now? What happened?" Sam asks and you nod, "I looked at the barn and I just couldn't look away. It's like I was supposed to be looking at that and only that. So I just rested my head down until the feeling went away."

"Fuck." Sam whispers as he looks to the left, "That place is more powerful than people think."

"Here." You take the bandana from Colby, "I'll go."

He lets you take it, "Are you sure?" You nod as you untie it, "Yes." You wrap the bandana around your head, completely blocking your vision. You take a shaky breath as you feel Colby lay the headphones in your hand.

"Whenever you're ready." He assures and you nod before putting them on, static completely drowning out everything else.

Sam takes a deep breathe, "Can you tell us who we're talking to?"

"Sam." You straighten your back as his name rolls off your tongue, "Colby?"

"What do you want with y/n?" Colby asks, eyes glued to you, "Why do you want her?"

You try and keep your breathing under control as you do your best to listen, "You can't have her."

"No." Sam says sternly, "You're the one who can't have her. She isn't yours to touch or have, just like the innocent women that you killed years ago."

You tighten your hands into fists, "They weren't good."

"Why weren't they good? Can you tell us what was bad about them?" Colby asks as he looks around, "Arlon. Can you tell us why?"

You listen few seconds, "Arlon. He's here. It's him. Help."

Colby takes a deep breath, "Should we pull her out?" Sam shakes his head, "Not yet. Arlon, why are they so scared of you?"

You tilt your head, "Bad things happened. He did it."

"We know he did bad things. We know it was him. Can y-" Sam stops talking as you cut him off.

You speak normally, "It's almost like they're arguing with him."

Sam looks at Colby, "Arguing? Like one do the girls and Arlon?" Colby shrugs, "Can you tell us why he killed those women?" Colby pauses for second, "Why did he kill you?"

Words are shouted loudly in your ear, "He says he had to."

"Was it the cult he ran? Can you tell us about that?" Sam asks, watching you.

You shake your head, " He wanted to."

Sam and Colby look at each other, "Did Cordelia bring you to the house?" Sam runs a hand through his hair, glancing at the camera before snapping his head back to you.

"You don't love her."

"who? Who are you talking about?" Colby asks, "Who doesn't love who?"

"Sam. Colby." You pause for a second, "Y/n."

"Holy shit." Sam sighs, "Why do you want y/n?"

"Mine."

"Not a chance." Colby says looking at Sam, "I'm going to tap her leg."

"Mine. No!"

"Colby. Her hair." Sam points to your hair that's lifting off your shoulder and Colby taps your leg a few times, kinda rough.

You jump as you feel the tapping and you push the headphones off before ripping the bandana off of your head, "Okay. What the fuck?"

Sam has a shocked look on his face and Colby lays a hand on your back, "Did you not feel your hair lifting up?"

You shake your head, "Um. No." You run your hand down over your hair, "I was only focused on the arguing I was hearing, what were you guys asking?"

They fill you in and you raise your brows, "So it makes sense as to why it sounded like it was arguing." You shake your head, "That's.. actually kind of scary, not going to lie."

"I don't think you going any closer to the barn is a good idea." Colby says, "I don't want to risk you getting hurt or anything."

You nod, "No I agree. I don't even like looking at it." You look to the barn and away, shaking your head as you close your eyes, "Anyway. Sam. Are you doing this?"

Sam nods, "Yeah. Yeah." He takes the headphones, sitting down in the same spot you and Colby sat. He ties the blindfold around his head and takes a deep breath before putting on the headphones.

Instantly, his words are loud, "Help.."

"What do you need help with?" Colby asks as he sits down next to him, "Who is asking for help?"

You freeze, eyes moving from Sam to Colby as soon as Sam just starts listing off names non stop, "Kathleen, April, Eloise, Bethany, Rita, Liza, Sarah, Taylor.."

"Are you the girls Arlon sacrificed?" You ask and Sam responds instantly, "Yes, he's evil."

"Is he with us right now?" Colby asks and Sam tilts his head, "He went out."

"Where did he go?" Colby asks, and you'rere frozen with fear as you see a black shadow figure move a little being Colby, "C-Colby."

"Outside." Sam says and Colby looks at you, "Where outside?" He looks back at Sam, "Is he with us?"

Sam doesn't say anything for a few minutes.

You reach over, tapping Colby's leg, "there was a shadow figure behind you." He turns around quickly and looks back at you, "Where?"

"It was like a foot or so back from you. I don't know, I just seen it and then it was gone." You wrap your arms around your tighter, "Mayne we sho-"

"No." Sam says, "Don't go."

"Why?" You ask, "Why do you want us to stay?"

"You know."  Sam says and you shake your head, "we're not staying." You go to tap Sam's leg but it's almost like something grabs your wrist to prevent you from disturbing him.

"I can't.." you try to pull your hand away but it's like stuck there, "Colby."

"They can't help you." Sam says and then he rips the headphones off, throwing them away from him. He pushes the blindfold up and your hand drops, "Fucking no. No fucking way."

"Are you okay?" Colby grabs your hand and your hand goes to wrap around it, "My wrist is burning." Sam crawls forward, grabbing the flashlight from his bag. He shines the light on your skin and you all become shocked when you see finger marks on your wrist.

"I went to tap Sam, get him out of it, and something grabbed my wrist, I couldn't move until Sam threw off the headphones." You explain, pulling your wrist to your chest.

"No, we're done. We're leaving." Colby stands up, grabbing his backpack and it sounds like something heavy falls in the barn, causing all of you to move back a little bit.

"What was that?" Sam asks quietly and you all just stare at the dark opening of the barn, "I don't know and I really don't want to find out." Colby walks over to you, helping you stand up, "We can come back in the daytime, try something then."

"Yeah, right. Okay." Sam gets up, bending down to grab the camera after slinging his backpack on. You start to walk around the way you came, a lot slower than normal, just to be cautious if there was anyone else there.

"Right before I threw the headphones off, it was a loud, clear as day, man voice yelling death like three times in a row, like boom boom boom." Sam explains, "Ive never.. had that happen." He lays a hand on his chest, looking over at you.

He reaches out, grabbing your wrist to inspect it, "Is it still burning?" You shake your head, "No. thankfully."

"Alright. I haven't heard any-" Colby stops talking and instantly switches the light to the camera off when the sound of branches breaking sounds from the woods next to you.

"Should we call out? What if it is people?" Colby whispers leaning in to you and Sam. Sam wraps an arm around you as you huddle next to him, "We should just go."

"we're going, but like.." Colby sighs, "I think we should acknowledge that we hear it, them, you know what I mean?"

"I get what you're saying but like.." Sam pauses and there's a bang on the window, causing you all to jump and move away from the house, "we can just try to make it to the car?"

"Okay." Colby whispers, "Stay close together."

You move along the house more, your grip tightening into Sam's jacket as you see the car in view. Colby stops, "Should we just book it?"

"Yeah, but at least turn the light on." Sam says and Colby switches the light on, but it suddenly goes back out. He tries switching it on a few times, "It's not.. turning back on."

"Fuck, okay." Sam digs into his sweatshirt pocket, pulling out a flashlight. He switches it on and it stays on, "Okay. Lets go."

His arm stays around you as you guys start for the car. Sam's grip is suddenly ripped away from you when he falls to the ground with a groan.

"Sam!" You yell, turning around to go down to him, "Are you okay? What happened?"

Sam gets up as quick as he can, "I tripped or what tripped?" He shakes his head, "Let's just get-"

The door slamming shut on the front door of the farm house causes him to snap his head towards it, "Get in the car."

Colby reaches for the door handle, pulling on it a few times, "Keys. Keys. Keys."

"I thought you had them." Sam yells quietly as he pats his pockets, "Shit." You check your pockets frantically, hoping that some miracle will happen and one of you will find them.

"Backpacks. Check the backpacks." Colby drops his bag to the ground and sets the camera down before digging in his.

You and Sam do the same and you shake your head, "I checked each pocket." You sigh, "What the fuck."

"You didn't drop them in the house did you?" Sam asks as you grab the flash light. You shine it around the car and point with a slightly loud, "Ah ha. There! There."

"How did they get under-" Colby reaches under the car, pulling them out, "The fucking car?"

"We can talk about it when we get in, just unlock it." Sam says as he throws his stuff back into the backpack.

Colby unlocks it, causing the lights to flash. You all rip open the doors and get in, shutting them with a slam.

"Fuck that." Sam says.

"I honestly can't believe we stayed that long." Colby sighs, "What the fuck is that place?"

You take a few deep breathes, trying to remind yourself that you're in the car now. You're safe.

"Okay. Let's just.. Go back to the hotel and we can figure out everything there." Sam turns around to look at you, "You good? You okay?"

You nod, "Yeah. Yeah. I'm good." He nods and turns back around, buckling up as Colby starts to drive, "I just want to know if people were there. That was fucking weird."

"That whole place is fucking weird. You have to be out of your mind to go there at night." Sam pauses before laughing slightly.

You and Colby join in laughing. The feeling of relief settles in the further you drive down the gravel driveway.

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

I'm sorry that it's so long but if you made it to this point, I truly appreciate you so much. Thank you for reading.

I figured this was a good place to stop. When the time comes, I’m thinking of doing a part 2 where they investigate the barn during the day? What is think?

Love you so much 🖤

[cameronspecial]

You Are Our Perfect Boy, Baby

Pairing: Frat!Rafe Cameron x Reader

Warnings:  Difficulties With Getting Pregnant

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 0.8K

Summary: Trying to give Asher a younger sibling is proving harder than they thought it would and Y/N can't hold on to hope anymore.

Masterlist

Rafe never thought he would want children, yet when Y/N came along, he knew that he couldn’t imagine a life without them. They would be the perfect representation of his and Y/N's love and they would help grow that love into something even better. When Asher hit four years old, the spouses thought that it was time to make their family grow. However, trying to conceive a child the second time around is proving to be harder than when they created Asher. It’s been two years and no luck seems to be in sight for the couple. Rafe can see how the lack of success is affecting his angel. She no longer holds any excitement or hope while taking a pregnancy test. She will pee on the stick and leave it on the bathroom sink as soon as she is done, not bothering to wait by it anymore. Rafe wants to do anything to make her feel better, but what can he do if she refuses to go to a fertility clinic with him? He doesn’t blame her for not wanting to go. He knows that any answer they get can just lead to one of them feeling incredibly guilty. They’ve always talked about foster children, except that was only after they had one more child biologically. Because as selfish as it was, they wanted at least one stable sibling for Asher to have while growing up before they opened his world up to siblings, who could come and go. Sure, they could always adopt the children, but the parents recognize the fact that some children in the foster system are there until their permanent home is made stable again and that is the main reason why the pair wanted to foster. To give the children in waiting a safe place to be while their parents either find a stable home or try to find a sober path. 

The lack of being able to conceive again makes Y/N question whether the universe has more children in mind for them. It makes her think that she doesn’t deserve more kids, so even fostering or adoption is off the table. In all honesty, she just doesn’t know if she can deal with even the slightest possibility of rejection by those systems. This test in her hand is the last chance she is giving them to have the future they planned for them. She is exhausted by the disappointment and can’t deal with it anymore. Rafe pleads with the universe to be on their side for once in this process. The timer goes off and both of them hold their breath as they look at the result. Negative. Tears stream down her face at what she sees. Rafe tries to pull her into a hug to comfort her, but she shrugs off his hold and throws the test in the garbage can. 

She walks out of their bathroom and heads to the kitchen. Asher is on the couch watching TV. His eyes flicker to his mother and he spots the salty droplets rolling down her face. He abandons the TV show and runs to hug her. “What’s wrong, Mommy?” he worries, snuggling his face into her leg. She smiles down at him and picks him up in her arms. She gives him a kiss on the cheek, “Mommy is okay. She just found out some bad news today.” “Oh, what happened?” he asks for clarification. She hears Rafe’s footsteps approach and he stands at the entrance of the hallway, watching the scene from a distance to give her space. Her eyes lock with his and they make a silent agreement over what to say. They agree to tell him the truth. They believe that if they want Asher to be emotionally intelligent, then they have to be open about how and why they feel a certain way. “Well, you know how you’ve been asking for a little brother or sister,” she starts. He nods. “Mommy and Daddy found out that we can’t have one and it makes Mommy sad because we really wanted to have one and we know how much you did too.” Asher snuggles his face into her neck, “It’s okay, Mommy. I know you tried your hardest to give me one. It’s like you said, you tried your hardest and that is what counts.” Asher notices his father in the hallway and beckons him over. Rafe approaches his son. “Daddy, can you help me make Mommy tea please?” 

Y/N lets out a sob, covering her mouth to try to hide it. Her son’s words fill her with warmth and a sense of pride. She and Rafe are raising Asher to be a fine young man. She can’t believe that through this whole process, she forgot how great the child she already has is. “You are too sweet. Mommy and Daddy are so glad to have you because you are our perfect boy, Baby,” she praises, pressing another kiss on his cheek. Although raising another baby may not be in their cards, Y/N is so grateful that she still gets to be the mother of an amazing little boy. 

Taglist: @winterrrnight @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @wickedlovely121 @thepatriarchykeychain @drewsmusee @starkowswife @maybankslover @forstarkey @loving-and-dreaming

[cowboyjen68]

hi jen - im a college student who has known i like girls since i was a kid but i still can't pick up the courage to tell my parents. they're not virulently homophobic or anything and i know for a 100% fact that they love me unconditionally, but i also know they'd be much happier if i was straight. they're older and the culture they were raised in just doesn't really understand or accommodate anything else, though they are always respectful towards lgbt people they know.

i am completely secure in the knowledge that they love me so much they'd come to an understanding of it eventually, but i know at least at first it would cause a lot of turmoil and worry for them and a lot of really uncomfortable questions and explanations for me.

i know i can't keep it a secret forever and i don't want to live a lie all my life to the people i love and value most. and i know they wouldn't want that for me either. but the thought of sitting them down and telling them is the most terrifying thing in the world. i just can't do it. i'm too scared to rock the boat. do you have any advice?

I was in a very similar situation when I was your age. I was pretty sure they would continue to love and support me but also knew mom would be sad and worried and I wondered if dad would feel hurt. I waited until after college when I had a job that provided a living wage, health insurance and stability without their financial help. I made dinner plans with them and showed up with Chinese take out from Dad's favorite place. We sat down and I could immediately feel my ears burning and my face get hot. I looked over at them from behind the giant glass of milk mom poured each of us and realized I was in my "childhood" seat and they were in the same spot as always except now I was 23. They clearly saw me as the "baby" still. I was the youngest, probably the easiest kid to raise. I did my homework, did my chores and played without them entertaining me.

Immediately the worst case scenario ran through my head. "what if they kick me out", "what if they yell" "what if they tell me I am bad or gross or just mistaken". I had to really push all that aside at look at them as the mom and dad who had always been there for me. I reminded myself that I had my friend group, my sister, my best friend on my side and I would be okay. BUT loosing mom and dad would be horrible. I remember my exact words "Mom, Dad, Jen (my girlfriend at the time) is not just my friend. I am gay and we are together. Mom started crying and Dad looked at her surprised. "Doris. We already knew this" and she said "I know but it just means life is going to be harder for her. At that point my dad responded with words that chanced my life. He said "This is Jippy (my nickname) we are talking about. She will be just fine".

I guess my point is they might say some dumb stuff, ask stupid or even mean sounding questions but give them the benefit of the doubt that it comes from love. They don't need to understand to love you but bonus points to them if they want to or try to understand more by asking or having a conversation. It is okay for you and for them to set boundaries. They might ask for a head up before you bring a girlfriend to dinner or they might request no physical affection until they can process. Give them the grace to work through things. You have been thinking about this for years. They might have just had their entire life plan / dream for you upended. OR most likely they knew it already but hearing it confirmed can be hard.

Don't take abuse or bullying. You can also set your boundaries. Be prepared to be independent but allow them mistakes and missteps without harsh consequences if you sense they are trying.

You can start the conversation with "i love you and you both mean a lot to me so I want to be honest with you about something important to me. I am a lesbian. Let them know they are important and you trust them right up front.

I hope this helps and keep in mind, You don't HAVE to tell them until you are ready .

[starlostlix]

ARCANE S2 ACT 1 SPOILERS BELOW as I analyse the scene between Vi, Jinx, Caitlyn and Isha, what it means for them, and the link to Caitlyn's 3-point plan for the strike team.

I don't usually post about Arcane here but I need a place to talk about it without word limits so here we are. Also my comparison between MTP's telling of A scandal in Bohemia and the og will be done at some point I have just been very distracted.

So the scene I'm focusing on starts here when Isha runs up to where Jinx and Vi are fighting, lying between them a pointing a gun at Vi to protect Jinx.

Now Isha is a kid that has accidentally wandered into Jinx's life and gotten attached to her enough to wish to try and save her from danger - a new found family for Jinx alongside Sevika (who gives aunt vibes to me). But not just any kid is going to run into the line of fire like this. If we know anything about Isha now it's that she's brave - really brave - but also shouldn't have to be in this position.

Taking at look at her face, Isha's expressions seem to flick between anger and fear quite quickly. There's the facial muscles around her nose often flaring for that anger, but also a deep fear you can see too.

I think it's how she maintains focus on Jinx whilst the gun is turned away to Vi that's interesting. It's clear that she's afraid of what Vi is doing and is focused mostly on protecting Jinx - so that gun isn't something she necessarily wants to fire. She occasionally kept trying to press the trigger, but her hesitation isn't necessarily that she can't, but that she doesn't want to. She had ample time to take a very clear shot but she doesn't (this is interesting when we think about Caitlyn nearby who is desperate to take a shot even if it's not completely clear - Isha's motive is protection whereas Caitlyn's is revengeful action). And once she is unarmed all she can do is cling to Jinx. Perhaps both for her protection of Jinx or for Jinx to protect her. Like how a child would cling to a mother or father or even a bigger sister. Isha is supposed to play the role of a younger sibling to, in my eyes, mimic that of Vi and Powder that Jinx is desperate to protect.

I wanted to move on to Vi because I think her reactions/expressions are the most interesting. You get to see her face a lot, and once Isha has the gun to her face the main expression is one of fear. Not fear for her own safety, but a fear for Isha's safety, AND a fear of what she's been doing as an enforcer.

When Isha has the gun, all Vi can focus on is this mystery child - who she's never seen before might I add- suddenly appearing to protect Jinx. Even if Isha is scared she's still trying to protect her, trying to help even. Perhaps Vi sees herself here, a kid just trying to protect her loved ones from the enforcers that oppressed them. Perhaps she sees Powder, a kid throwing themselves in harms way just to try to help. Either way, she sees an innocent kid putting themselves in the line of fire to protect their loved ones. Except this time Vi is the dangerous one, rather than the protector role she used to fill.

When the gun is knocked away we see Vi again, frozen in place as she stares at Isha clinging to Jinx. This one feels so much more like a face of realisation - that Jinx still has loved ones left and that Vi has become the problem she swore to destroy. She's become the enforcer who enters Zaun to 'clear stuff up' with no regard for how it affects the people of Zaun. Instead of a protecter, she has become an aggressor.

If you will, remember Caitlyn's 3 goals - 'Locate Jinx, Dismantle Shimmer, and neutralise any agents still loyal to Silco'. I feel that this is where Vi realises that those goals only truly help the people of Piltover rather than anyone in Zaun.

1 - 'Locate Jinx' - this is basically corporate speak for Caitlyn wanting to k!ll Jinx. Originally, Vi was fine with this, seeing Jinx as a 'monster she created' and who 'taints the memory of her sister' Powder. But in doing so, she now realises that she will leave people behind who care for Jinx - Isha in particular. She's seen in her life so many kids left behind after enforcers k!lled their parents/families who then turn to rebellion (INCLUDING HERSELF AND POWDER!!) that she knows if she k!lls Jinx here with Isha as witness that the cycle will only continue - more kids who turn to violence as a result of trauma. If she were to go through with it she'd have become a direct parallel to those enforcers who killed her own parents, and she's already become a parallel to the ones who terrorised her and her family in her childhood with her activities in the Zaun strike team (especially with their usage of the Grey).

2 - 'Dismantle Shimmer' - whilst the removal of this drug is a good thing for pretty much anyone, the way the team go about it creates huge problems. The team are specifically shown to simply burn large quantities of the stuff (in the opening montage to 'Hellfire') - not only does this add more dangerous gasses to the underground areas (which they've already been releasing the Grey into), but it also creates issues for addicts. With access to it simply cut off, a decent portion of the population who are addicted to it will experience pretty dangerous withdrawal symptoms which could even lead to d3ath. With no system in place, addicts are left entirely on their own, so the destruction of Shimmer like this only helps those in Piltover remove a threat to them without actually helping the people. Meanwhile higher-ups in Piltover like Salo can use it recreationally (for his tattoos, even if frowned upon as implied by Mel's conversation with Lest).

3 - 'Neutralise any agents still loyal to Silco' - I'm pretty sure the Chembarons are considered Silco loyalists due to the Zaun strike team's attack on one of Margot's brothels in episode 2. The Chembarons, now down to 3 of them, were heralded as the only leadership of Zaun besides Silco. Their infighting has caused major issues in Zaun, but their elimination will not necessarily help Zaun in the long run. The removal of the Chembarons will leave a power vacuum, much like the one already left by Silco, that others will only step into over time. The removal of leadership in Zaun will only cause more issues as up-and-comers will try to fill the power vacuum and build their own forces, eventually becoming a new threat but not without a long period of chaos as people try to build resources to fill the vacuum. Piltover needs the removal of those with current power and forces to remove any possible threats of attack like the attack on the councillor memorial. It is, again, only for the benefit of Piltover.

Vi had seen becoming an Enforcer as the only way to bring down Jinx (reinforced by Caitlyn's insistence of doing things together and also partly by Maddie talking about what Caitlyn did to get her the job) AND as a way of protecting Caitlyn, but now I feel that she has been able to see the negative affect she's been having on the people of Zaun - her own people. I think this is why Vi switches into doing anything she can to protect Isha and Jinx, her protective side for Powder kicking back in specifically.

Looking back at Jinx, she was so ready to d!e at Vi's hands until Isha appears. Her expression here is the clearest look at her emotions we really see in the sequence - concern and fear. We know she's not afraid of dying or k!lling (especially when she said earlier before the fight that she's not remorseful of orphaning kids as she's 'done it to herself enough'), but she's so visibly afraid of Isha being hurt, and afraid that Vi would be the one to k!ll Isha. She's grown attached to Isha more than she'd like to admit, perhaps even seeing similarities to her and Powder (especially in their desire to help their family).

Once Isha's gun is shot away she clings to Jinx. Jinx at first is trying to claw her off - get her away from the danger, telling her to 'scram', referring to her simply by 'kid' so she leaves and doesn't get hurt. But when Vi is just sitting there looking rather than attacking she brings Isha in closer as a form of protection and looks at Vi. The way she looks at Vi. That's fear. She's afraid of her own sister again. She's afraid her sister will hurt an innocent kid, who's just trying to help, with a punch again. All her face says is 'Don't hurt this kid'.

And it's devastating. Devastating for both Jinx and Vi. Jinx sees her sister as a threat, whereas Vi begins to see a bit of Powder in Jinx again. She sees herself about to repeat a mistake that previously cost her everything - leaving a child alone with no support. This is also part of what turns Vi to protect Jinx and Isha from Caitlyn.

Last but not least, Caitlyn.

Caitlyn's effect on this scene can sometimes be forgotten (I almost didn't include her in this analysis at all) but it's actually bigger than one may think. I mentioned before how her desperation to k!ll Jinx causes her to shoot even when her shot is not clear (and how it contrasts Isha's reluctance to shoot even with a clear shot), but there's also so much more. For one, she shoots at the gun Isha is holding almost without a second thought. She tries to shoot Jinx whilst Isha is clinging on to her almost without a second thought. She shoots Vi's gauntlets when she tries to stop her. She frankly is unhinged at this point, tunnel vision on k!lling Jinx with no regard for anyone else in this situation, not just Isha but Vi also.

Grief is a strange thing. It can create many reactions from people depending on their situation. In Caitlyn's case, her grief has morphed into a desire for revenge and a thirst for violence, strengthening her pre-established prejudices towards Zaunites that she was so adamant in reversing in season 1. In her grief there is one constant - blame for Jinx - that morphs into further prejudices towards Zaunites as a whole to justify her actions in her own mind. She similarly justified her tunnel vision in this fight with the idea that 'she wasn't going to miss' despite missing her shot multiple times already (specifically when she shoots to k!ll Jinx and only hits her middle finger).

Her actions here are what happens when grief takes control and her usual logic and reasoning is not able to intervene as much as usual. Her insistence on not harming innocents (seen early in episode one), her understanding of how Zaunites were treated unfairly (s1 episode 7) - it's all overshadowed by her grief. However, her grief doesn't excuse her actions - she's still making decisions based on her own internalised prejudices that with her grief are projected outwards and drive her actions.

This has all culminated here, where her tunnel vision has led to her hurting Vi and almost caused her to hurt an innocent child. She's this looming threat to the scene, her hextech rifle being probably the most powerful weapon here - and it's in the hands of someone who is vengeful and seemingly trigger-happy and in a position of power she was not ready for. If Vi was a big danger in Jinx and Isha's eyes at first, there's a bigger danger in Caitlyn, one that even Vi notices. And she's only going to get worse next arc.

[There could be more to say but I think this is a great place to end it! I may make more arcane posts as s2 releases but i'll have to see, I just really wanted to talk about this scene in particular it's just so interesting.]

[elieowlsclownery]

Clara's Wings? Clara's Wings? Clara's Wings? Clara's-?

(Also Discussing How Clara's View on Usefulness Affects Her Ability to Grow Because I Can't Ever Stick to One Topic When It Comes To My Favorite Weird Girl)

For every chapter we ponder, "Is this where we get Azz's Bloodline Ability? Is this is? Is thi-?" every other chapter we ponder in equal measure, "Is this where we get to see Clara's wing's? Is this it? Is thi-?" And every time for both of these mysteries Nishi's always been like-

Since I already theorized about Azz's bloodline ability it's only fair to also discuss Clara's wings. This'll be the last M!IK post before the next chapter where everything will turn out FINE and Clara passes the terminus exam with flying colors and they all go to the muddy-buddy swamp!!!

Before chapter 384 we all kind of assumed that Clara's secret would involve her wings since out of all the demons in Iruma's school she's the only one who's never showed hers. It's kind of a big deal that demons have wings in this world. Like before Iruma told Balam he's human he was incredibly worried that he might not have wings, because a demon not having wings could be considered a danger to their health. Yet Clara never showed them, not even during the flying exam.

So it's surprising that her wings are not the big secret she's been hiding from Iruma and Azz...or at least it was at first. Now I kind of understand why it wasn't revealed. Here's a few reasons I can think of.

1: The Secret's Directly Related to Her Wicked Phase and Soulmates - While Clara ate the black candy that triggered her Wicked Phase she was struggling to study for the end-of-terminus exam. If she fails she'll be stuck doing the make-up classes and be left behind again. In fact given the sneak peak we got for the next chapter she's been worried about being left behind a lot recently, from her losing in the Heartbreaker Arc way faster and both her soulmates being at least a rank ahead of her (or in Iruma's case 1.5 ranks ahead if you count Mephisto's patented 5.5 rank.) Not to mention her soulmates going places where she can't be there for them or protect them from bad guys.

So the reason why her wicked phase is so possessive is in direct reaction to her current predicament and secret worries. It's her defense mechanism, the knot currently preventing her from moving forward, just how Ameri's worries about not be demure and sweet enough like the heroine of the forbidden texts prevented her from moving forward. So it makes sense that the secret Iruma and Azz needed to know is the one that's causing her current state-of-mind and involves them both. Her wings don't have anything to do with this at the moment.

2: Wings Still Gives Clara a Secret to Share - It's important to remember Iruma and Azz did not want to know about Clara's secret this way. Each soulmate wanted to eventually tell each other their secret on their own terms, and I wanted them to be able to say it on their own terms too! Unfortunately Clara's secret was forced open due to the circumstances, which while necessary for the story and her character development is still a bummer. BUT because Clara's wings weren't revealed she has something she could tell them on her own terms!

3: Clara's Wings Might Be Important to the Story, But Not to Clara Herself - The only time she was uncomfortable about her wings was when the girls were talking fashion and Elizabeth casually asked. Before that we never see Clara ever be put in a tight spot because of her wings, not even during the Flying Exam. This and her actual deep secret reveal makes me believe that she usually doesn't even think about her wings most days. She's acclimated to life without her wings, and her family seems to do the same, so there's no reason for her to be bothered by them.

So WHY are Clara's wings so hidden that most of the time she doesn't think about it? If the most popular theory is right, it's because her wings are a BIG deal in the demon world, and because of that her mom raised her kids so they never need to rely on them.

When Clara's mom introduced her to Babyls she emphasized it as a free and fun place, which Clara really gravitated toward. She also said that thanks to the people around her she's always enjoyed freedom.

What if her wings are hidden because it threatens her freedom? That it'll involve her and her family in not-so-fun stuff? Like if it's found out that Clara and her family have something powerful or threatening, higher-ranking demons might want to either use them to their advantage or get rid of a potential threat (we'll get to the word use later) Remember that we recently had an arc where a race of demons were threatened because their unique abilities were so essential to higher-ranking demons and that their independence threatens that access? There's good reason to not want to get involved in that power struggle.

Mind you this is if Clara's wings are what we think they are based on the lore of the Valac name. There's still a chance her wings may be very different from what we imagine....but since we're here let's talk about that option first.

The most popular and story-significant theory is that Clara has angel wings. Or technically wings of a deity, since deities been revealed to be a thing in M!IK and fill a similar role to angels. Reason this theory is so popular is due to Valac's lore in demonology, where the demon Valac has the appearance of an angelic boy who rides a two-headed serpent and has the power to find hidden treasure. He can also reveal where serpents can be found. Clara wears a pair of dragon slippers named Connor and Murf, and is capable of pulling anything she's seen from her pockets. She even called the place usually named Toybox her "Treasure Box" while in her Wicked Phase. And as for finding serpents...well....she did catch one.

All this to say a lot of Clara's appearance and powers is inspired by her demon namesake, so it's not that big of a stretch to say she could also have angelic wings. Not that she and her family are deities or angels, they might just have the wings and not the powers. But the wings themselves would be enough to stir things in the demon world, and we know someone who hates any race aside from demons, including deities.

I'd like to think if Clara has angel wings they'd be Purson-sized, tiny and cute and fluffy! That would also contrast with Balam's wings, which are feathery but more akin to wings of a predatory bird. Hers could also be more like Shura's appearance, who so far is the only deity we've physically seen. There is the room for Clara's growth that's flower-based, so maybe her wing are more...petally?

Now unlike any theories for Azz's bloodline ability (including my own) I think there's a lot more weight to the theory of Clara's having angel wings given her namesake...but I still don't think it's a guarantee. Like I'm placing my theory on Azz's bloodline ability being paralyzing at a 15% chance of happening (there's just not a lot to go by so far for ANY Azz theories at the moment. We don't even have any hints to what his dad is like!) and the angel/deity wings theory at a 50-55% chance. The chances are high compared to other theories, but it's not a 100% slam dunk. So if it turns out Clara doesn't have angelic/flowery wings don't be too disappointed.

The Angelic Wings are the most mainstream theory, and I haven't seen a lot of other ideas about her wings that go against it, so these next theories is more me just throwing some spaghetti on the wall.

One is maybe Clara's wings are "mysterious" in that it can't maintain a single form. Like the plant she accidentally made in the early chapters, strange and oddly shaped where the parts don't all match up. In that sense there'd be no point in Clara opening her wings because the wings don't make any sense for flying, and Clara would have to learn to use them in a unique and fun way, just like how she uses her bloodline abilities.

So when Clara was with the girls she was reluctant to show her wings because they weren't "pretty" like there's were, since one of the struggles Clara had in the beginning was not being attractive in a conventional way. She seemed to get over this, but as we've seen in Chapter 384 a lot of her previous worries were never really resolved, just tucked away quietly in her pocket.

The other theory I have is that instead of hiding wings Clara has yet to make her wings using her bloodline ability. After all one of Clara's biggest strength is her creativity, and she's able to pull out anything from her pockets. So if Clara sews a pair of pockets to the back of her shirt and is able to further develop her power, she could make any pair of wings using what she saw and her imagination. If she's able to do this I think it'd be a really interesting physical representation of her growth. There's also the chance that Iruma could learn to make his own pair of usable wings the same way he learned to create his bow which would be fun.

Back to the angel wing theory though if it is true it goes in line with my other talking point, which is that Clara's issues of being useful might be impeding on her ability to grow.

In a lot of manga and anime centered around a male lead there's always a female character or two that's deemed "useless" by viewers because they're always weaker compared to the main character. Sometimes this is due to the author never giving their female characters a chance to shine and a general unwillingness to ever make them even slightly stronger than the male lead, and sometimes this is due to just plain vitriol and not liking girls in general. Even when it's shown that the girl is powerful and does have importance to the story the viewers could still call them weak and worthless if the girl doesn't conform to their standards.

Clara though? Clara's the opposite. Anyone who's paid even slight attention to her abilities realizes her powers are not just strong, but has the potential to be ridiculously overpowered. Like for one she can make anything, anything, that she sees. Two if she can drag them into her costume she can trap them in her domain pocketworld, with no visible exit, and slowly drain their mana. This power got even stronger in her wicked phase, where she was able to drag Iruma and Azz into the pocketworld directly from her pockets without having to wear the costume. Like imagine for a second in a less hopeful universe that Clara Returned to Origins. She's seen the evil cycle candy. Guys, fellows and fellas, my gender neutrals, she can replicate the evil cycle candy!!!

If Clara utilized her ability properly along with her creativity she'd be a force to reckon with...but she's not. Well, I mean she is at the moment while in her wicked phase, but most of the time she's not.

Partially its thanks to THIS Loser, whose imagination was so small they could only think to use her as a snack machine. As shown when she was trapped in that illusion and this recent chapter, that fear of being used just for her ability was never erased. And while she knows her soulmates won't use her abilities...she's kind of placed herself in a different limit. That of the never-serious, always funtime Clara who cheers her friends.

Don't get me wrong, it's good that Clara is able to bring joy, it's good that Iruma said she uses her abilities for fun. The issue is that it's become a way for Clara to be useful again, where instead of being used for snacks she's used for joy and randomness. This isn't how Iruma and Azz see it, but it's how Clara chooses to be. She can't help but see herself on a value scale even with her friends. She's afraid of being used, and yet she feel she needs to somehow be useful in order to stay with them. Like when Iruma summoned her and Azz, she assigned herself immediately as the cheer captain.

I think the right trajectory would be for Clara to learn to love her abilities and realize what she really wants. Not just for her friends as funtime Clara, but for all of Clara. To be able to use her abilities fully on Clara's terms and not on anyone else's, not even her soulmates. After all magic is based one's own desire.

It's the same for Azz's progress actually. It's good that Iruma embraced his flames, it's good that his hard work was acknowledged and he's able to create something so beautiful and strong. But like Clara, he's put a real limit to his potential because of how he sees himself. Even as his friend, his soulmate, he still sees himself as a weapon for Iruma to use. So yeah maybe Azz should learn to expand his horizons too, be it through revealing his bloodline ability or discovering other ambitions outside of Iruma.

Back to Clara though the one fear I've always had long before these recent chapters is that if she's able to show her real potential and gain some notoriety like Iruma...there's a real danger others might try to use her again, and unlike her old bullies it won't just be for snacks and juice. Add that to the possibility of her having angelic wings and her potential as a chess piece skyrockets. The idea that Clara experiencing character growth and catching up to her soulmates will lead to more people trying to use her would be heartbreaking. But so long as her soulmates are around and she learns to love herself more I believe in her!

...I'm just really, really hoping a certain group never find out she went into her wicked phase or discovers her real potential. After all as stated before she can replicate evil cycle candy and is able to absorb others' mana...If Baal or Kirio so much as look at her I swear I'm gonna Isekai into the demon world and take them on myself!!!

[redxx95]

How Cherry Magic avoids romanticising self-sacrifice

Alright strap in boys, this is gonna be a long one.

Spoilers for the manga (mostly the english volumes but I will include a bit from vol 12. I'll mark it tho so yall may skip it if you don't want to be spoilered).

So in this one I want to examine how cherry magic does a great job at portraying self-sacrifice in a relationship as an actual flaw rather than a romantic ideal to aspire to. Very often you'll see characters in media putting their own needs aside for their lover. A lot of people will swoon at that because it is usually presented as proof of how dedicated they are to their partner and their wellbeing. (See... well the thai adaptation actually).

But what has pleasantly surprised me is how Toyota handles this in her manga.

Starting from the beginning, we all know the millions of things Kurosawa did for Adachi to get closer to him. After all, that is what's usually expected of him if we talk traditional gender roles. But one of the reasons Adachi even starts falling for Kurosawa is because of how he was for once able to do something for him.

For someone with very low self-esteem, being able to help this super-capable perfect man is a big boost in confidence and also raises his own selfworth.

So now let's look at a few instances of selfless action and the consequences resulting from them.

First one is the disaster-date in volume 4

Kurosawa does his very best to choose activities that he thinks Adachi will enjoy. That is his primary concern.

The effect this has on Adachi though is that the gap between them feels impossibly wide, only worsening his already low opinion of himself.

Whenever Kurosawa does something big, it makes Adachi feel that much smaller. That's why he'd rather them be equals in everything instead of one giving more than the other.

Next is the argument they have in volume 8

Kurosawa attempts to, very selflessly, protect Adachi from his lowkey homophobic parents. He doesn't want them and their opinions to hurt Adachi personally, so he ends up lying to him to keep the peace. The effect this has on Adachi though is disastrous. At first he's just generally worried about why Kurosawa would even lie to him in the first place, but then they have that fight in their living room and you really get a good look at how negatively this affects Adachi.

The very first conclusion he jumps to is that he's not doing good enough for Kurosawa to feel secure with him.

The next one is even worse, where he thinks he's not good enough in general. Both of these show how when pressed, he will default to blaming himself, believing that he is the problem first and foremost.

And then, if all of that wasn't bad enough, this happens next:

He's actually being self-deprecating again, something he hadn't done ever since Kurosawa told him not to in volume 5. And yes you can actually go back and check for yourself. Whenever he has negative thoughts after this point he's always pushing back.

So there's an escalation happening here, one that is entirely caused by Kurosawa not sharing his burdens with him, by making their relationship unequal.

I think it also hurts him extra bad because they've had this argument before, just with their roles switched.

So to him it must feel like Kurosawa is betraying the important lesson Adachi learned from that argument, which is that communicating with your partner is important, even when you feel like it might hurt them.

There's also something to be said about how most people would've probably stopped prodding when someone says "it's something I can't tell you", but Adachi knows that Kurosawa has a pattern of hiding his issues from him thanks to the mind reading, which is the whole reason they had that argument in vol 6 in the first place.

So, to summarize: Whenever Kurosawa acts selfless it takes a toll on Adachi's mental health. Because of his low self-esteem he needs to feel on equal terms with Kurosawa to be able to see himself as worthwhile. (And obviously he also loves Kurosawa and doesn't want to see him in pain just in general.)

So after all that, surely Kurosawa would have learned his lesson, right? Surely he wouldn't just do it again, right?

... Spoilers for volume 12 start here ✨

So volume 12 is all about Kurosawa overworking himself because he's been assigned this big project by their chief to oversee their company's spot at a stationery convention. (I didn't look up whether or not that's a real thing but it is in the manga universe I guess lmao.)

Adachi tries to help alleviate his burdens with mixed success.

(On the left he feeds Kurosawa because he needs to finish his work and doesn't have time to eat. On the right he tries to take a phonecall for Kurosawa but gets told that Kurosawa needs to hear it personally so relaying a message won't do.)

Then Adachi muses to himself how Kurosawa was always helping him out in the past and how Adachi can't do anything for him in return, especially since they're in different departments. He feels very useless, which is once again bad for his mental health.

Later at home, he offers to at least take over the chores for the time being, but gets told that Kurosawa actually enjoys doing chores so there's no need for him to help.

Kurosawa tells him that all he needs is Adachi to be close to him, while making out with him on the sofa. And right here we see how he only got half the lesson he was supposed to have learned in volume 8: In their fight Adachi told him that they should both be happy and he should share "all the hurt" with him, too. Well, the simple solution to that is not to see all his burdens as burdens, then he's not hurting and Adachi doesn't need to bother fussing over him! Win-win. Epic mind gymnastics 😎 (To be honest, I feel like this is actually very relatable to people that tend to give more than they take. We get so used to the weight of the burden that we don't notice it slowly pulling us down.)

So Adachi obviously notices what's going on and berates him about not having understood anything he said from that fight.

Throughout the volume Kurosawa gets more and more overworked, makes mistakes and is confronted with unexpected complications. He's very adamant about not asking anyone for help though, stating that he "can't be bothering his senpais any more than he already has" and that he's "doing this all for the sake of his future with Adachi".

He also still has some hangups about people seeing him as just a pretty face, as you can see in that flashback in the second page. He constantly feels the need to prove himself to others, which prevents him from ever seeking out help.

So when he inevitably reaches his limit, Adachi is finally able to be there for him, being the only one that sees through his facade.

(That hand kiss is so precious 😭)

Also, on that first page Adachi asks him whether or not he's fine, which reminds me of this panel from volume 6:

He really knows him so well.

Emboldened by his husband, Kurosawa finally does ask for help and is, of course, met with understanding and sympathy.

.

Spoilers for volume 12 end here ✨

So all this to say: Sometimes, when we try our best to be selfless and to protect the people close to us, we do more harm than good. Sometimes we cause harm to others (see volumes 4 and 8) and sometimes we cause harm to ourselves (see volume 12). It is of course a noble cause but it's not something to strive for at all times and can sometimes be actually counterproductive to what we wanted to achieve in the first place.

As someone who breaks themselves apart to help all the people around them, this aspect of the manga resonated very strongly with me and is probably the biggest reason I got so obsessed with this silly little BL romcom.

I know that this manga is not like, the best in quality. I know it's super niche and silly and cannot compare to the big popular mainstream manga with lots of depth and thought put into it, BUT.

A piece of art doesn't need to be "good" in order to resonate with people. You don't need to paint the mona lisa to reach someone and make them feel seen. You just need some sort of medium and a will to communicate something to the observer. (Something an AI could never replicate but that is a whole other discussion.)

This manga reached me when I needed it and it communicated a message that resonated with me and that is all it needed to do for me to love it to the point of obsession. 💖

Finally I'm done with this essay it is so long oh my god. If you reached the end of this, I'm so sorry. I hope you enjoyed it tho.

[pascaloverx]

Moonlight

Summary: You and Edward Cullen used to have a romantic relationship. But fate seemed not to believe in the possibility of a vampire and a potential she-wolf being together. Years after your separation, you return to Forks. Edward is committed to Bella Swan, and Jacob Black has his own pack. What happens when, upon your return, you begin to transform into a she-wolf and both Edward and Jacob seem eager to revisit the past with you?

Author's Note: The characters in this fanfic do not belong to me but to Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight universe. The story blends events that happened in the Twilight saga movies with invented ones. If you're enjoying the fanfic, please interact. This story will contain inappropriate language, a possible love triangle, scenes of violence, and romance. I would appreciate it if those who enjoy the fanfic could leave a comment and like (kudos). Engagement helps me know that there are still people reading. I hope you enjoy this chapter ❤

FIVE SEVEN

SIX

Edward insisted that you go to his house after you had sex in the car. As you said you would stay by his side in the heat of the romantic moment. It seems stupid now, but it's what you can do now. So at this moment, you are finishing your shower in the bathroom of Edward's almost-suite-like bedroom. He is currently informing his family that you are at their house. Your mind tells you that they will hate your presence, especially after his recent breakup with Bella. That's why, after finishing your shower, your plan is to look for a place to rent.

"You were wrong, they reacted better than you imagined. But they want you to come down for breakfast with them," Edward says, entering the bedroom and then opening the bathroom door, holding a towel for you to dry off. Sometimes you forget that he reads minds. You step out of the bathtub and wrap yourself in the towel. Edward kisses you gently while holding your face with both hands.

"Now try to tell me the truth. Your family doesn't have to force themselves to accept me here just because I'm homeless. I'll rent a place before Rosalie tries to throw me out the window. And I need to talk to Sam. But I can have breakfast with your family as long as none of them pretend to eat food." You say while putting on some clothes, and Edward turns around to give you privacy. When you finish dressing, you kiss Edward on the cheek, and he turns to look at you. Honestly, as he stares at you, a warm feeling of affection fills your heart.

"Don't you want me to go with you? Since you plan to reveal our relationship..." Edward says, holding your waist, and you hug him. Then you lightly slap his head, showing your annoyance at him reading your mind.

"Our agreement about you staying out of my mind still stands. I admit I'm scared of his reaction, but we're all grown-ups. And even though I can't read your mind, I can assure you that I won't run away or be afraid to admit that I feel something for you. Even if it could lead to a significant war between vampires and wolves. And you're definitely not coming with me," you say, laughing a little at Edward's reaction to hearing that he isn't going with you. Holding his hand, you head downstairs to have breakfast with the Cullens. The table is set, and it's clear they went to great lengths to make you feel welcome.

"We didn't know what you like to eat, but Bella used to have pancakes and bacon. Sometimes waffles and scrambled eggs. You're not exactly human, but you probably enjoy the same food she did. I know you two have similar tastes in many things," Rosalie says as you finish coming down the stairs. You look at her, knowing she isn't happy about your presence in her house, but you can't blame her.

"Rosalie, take it easy," Edward says, placing his hand on your shoulder, as if to show he's on your side. You breathe in and out, trying not to get upset. After all, do you really have the right to be upset?

"Edward is right, Rose. We have a guest, and we will treat her well. Y/N, I know you'll forgive Rose for her tone. We're just adjusting to this new situation," Carlisle says with some grace. He’s a good father. It makes you miss your own.

"I'd like to thank all of you for your efforts. But you don’t need to pretend. I know it’s sudden for me to be here; I promise I’ll leave. It’s too soon for us to be in this situation. Too soon for Edward and me to be together, but to be honest, Edward and I have had a relationship. We were secret lovers before he met Bella. That doesn’t justify anything, but perhaps Edward and I feel like we waited too long to be together." You look at all the Cullens in front of you, feeling like you’re making a confession. They seem to understand you, at least a little.

"Dear, I think I speak for everyone here when I say that it’s none of our business. As long as you and Edward are happy, we will support you," Alice says kindly. But you know it’s hard for them to support you both.

"I think it’s too early to talk about support. Not to be rude, Y/N, but just a few weeks ago Edward was ready to marry Bella. You can’t expect…" Jasper says, and you feel guilt washing over you. You’ve spoiled someone’s happy ending. You can't even respond. As the Cullens look at you with a mix of fear and concern, you see Edward wanting to comfort you. But right now, you need to leave this house. You should never have come. You run outside without saying anything more, hearing Alice cursing Jasper while Rosalie takes pride in not being the one to reveal that Edward was going to propose to Bella.

“Y/N, stop. Just listen to me for a moment. Don’t push us away. Don’t use this as an excuse to run from me,” Edward says, trying to stop you from getting into your car. You’re trying not to cry, trying to stay composed. But it feels like you’re back at square one.

“You were going to propose to her. Do you know what that means for us?” you say louder than you intended. Your emotions are overflowing.

“It was before you came back. Before we realized that what we felt before still exists. My decision not to propose was also a way to protect her,” Edward explains. You somewhat understand him, but right now, the anger towards Jacob feels justified. You feel like a terrible person.

“I’m not going to leave you. I’m tired of running, but I need some time. We both need to start over, slowly. I’m going to talk to Sam about us, and in the meantime, try to have a conversation with your family and your ex. But don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere,” you say, letting the tears roll down your face before going to Edward and giving him a soft, comforting kiss on the lips. Maybe, just maybe, you and he are meant to find a way through this together. After the kiss, you say goodbye to Edward and head towards Uley's house. You know he'll find out your big secret eventually. It’s better that you tell him. As you approach the house, you see Sam and Emily. Immediately, Uley seems to harden his expression when he sees you.

"I never supported your relationship with Jacob, but you’ve definitely managed to get yourself into a worse relationship. You and a monster whose heart doesn’t beat. A damned bloodsucker, a vampire. Do you have any idea what that is? An abominable union. Your father would die if he were here to witness this." Sam is too enraged, but Emily touches his hand lightly as if calming him down.

"We talked about this, Sam. Don’t be rude to her. I’ll make some tea for us," Emily says gently, giving Sam a kiss on the cheek. You watch as Emily leaves you and Sam alone.

"My father died knowing this. Knowing that his daughter fell in love with a cold monster that survives on blood. He found out just before he made me leave Forks. Before he died. He reacted like you, and I was too young to defend myself back then, but I’m not now. I’m not going to lower my head and let you walk all over me. If you want to resolve this, face me. You may have your pack, but you’re still a weak man. You can’t see beyond your own nose. That’s why you’re an imperfect leader." You don’t mince words as you let your anger take over. Sam looks at you almost with disgust now.

"I’m giving you the chance to leave and forget this ridiculous romance of yours. If you continue, I won’t hesitate to end this fairy tale of yours, even if it means hurting you." Sam threatens. You laugh at him, as if his attempt to intimidate you has only amused you, but the truth is, it’s frightening. And in reality, apart from Edward, you don’t think anyone else is on your side right now.

"So it’s pertinent for you to know that she will have the support of my pack. Hurting her means hurting me, Uley," Jacob says, appearing out of nowhere and surprising both you and Sam. He stands beside you, staring down Sam. You wonder how he knew you were talking to Sam or how he arrived so quickly, but it's good to see him there, even if you and he are currently at odds.

TO BE CONTINUED...

[eatanorange]

marauders do the candy trauma salad trend since I JUST saw a fantastic one for pjo (highly encourage y'all to add your versions/to this pls I don't have solid hcs of everyone) (evan's is fully me projecting btw)(a lot of them are me projecting <3).

Upon completion I want to add up here n not just the tags that these do reference various traumas/bigotry so be careful and mind what headspace ur in n all that pls take care of urselves k thanks love u.

Sirius: Hi I'm sirius and every time my mother considered something I did 'impure', like experience joy or get sorted in to gryffindor, she took my mouth away! *momentary zone out from the horrors* I brought milk duds!

Barty: bazooka bubblegum. *vid cuts* I'm barty and I hate my dad for all of the reasons you can imagine and I think it would be fun if he blew up. good?

Lily: Hi I'm Lily and after I got sent to magic school, all emotional ties with my muggle sister, who regards me as a freak, and my mother, who was more sensitive to her side, were severed. They didn't tell me when my dad died. I brought 3 musketeers.

Remus: Hi I'm remus and I got bit by a werewolf when I was 5, then my dad offed himself because of it. I brought moon pies.

James: Hi I'm James and I fell into limerence with someone and incessantly pursued them for over a year in ways that were detrimental to both of our mental states. I was so public about it I don't even need to say who it was. My mother sat me down one day and said "was it something your father and I did, something we said, that convinced you you need to beg someone to love you? to let you show them love?" and that broke something in me. We're chill now though, and I have coping techniques that work for me while still allowing me to be my expressive self, so I brought mr. goodbars.

Peter: Hi I'm peter and my animagus is literally a rat. I brought sour patch kids.

Dorcas: Hi I'm dorcas and my pureblood parents will never say it to my face but they wanted me to be a boy. To compensate I was sure to always get top marks, be well liked, and experience gender dysphoria. I burnt out before our 5th year, and learning radical acceptance in the place of trying to guess unspoken rules saved my life. I brought smarties.

Regulus: Hi I'm regulus and in order to be sure my mother didn't assassinate my brother for running away, I stayed behind in the abusive household and eventually became a deatheater to keep my cover, hunting down one bald headed bitch's horcruxes until it literally almost killed me. I think it did kill me in some lives. and I brought the starburst.

Mary: Hi I'm Mary and due to blood supremacist bigots, I have to go to school with people who want me to die just for having the audacity to exist. The muggle world is also like this. The school I go to does not matter in this scenario. I brought mentos for the salad and a bottle of soda for the show.

Evan: Hi I'm evan and my ex went on holiday to another country for 3 months, told me we could write to stay connected, they didn't, broke up with me via owl while still on said vacation, and then came to talk to me in person about that, denied that it was an active choice to disconnect from me, then tried to put the onus of any friendship to follow on just me. We haven't spoken since. Also I'm a sex positive, but also trauma affected ace, it was an open relationship, and they somehow still managed to be shady/inconsiderate about hooking up with someone on the vacation. I brought blow pops.

Pandora: Hi I'm pandora and sometimes I get prophetic dreams so vivid I can't tell when I wake up. Sometimes, though the future is not stagnant, I see my friends die :) I brought airheads.

Marlene: Hi I'm marlene and I have 5 brothers. 3 of them accept my nonbinary identity. The rest, and my parents, blatantly ignore that I use they/them pronouns. Then they told me if I don't have children as an adult I won't be worth visiting because it's my job as a pureblood to produce an heir. So I went to St. Mungos and got sterilized. I brought baby ruth candy.

Hope you enjoy! and thanks if you read them all! This was fun for me.