#but i can always shift around whatever's needed

[sirxlla]

On Your Period (Batboys)

----------------------------------------------------

Dick: You and Dick were out and about at the mall while you both did a bit of splurging, got lunch, made some Build A Bears for eachother...Dick saw blood on your pants as you bent over to check out the little trinkets in this next shop. He said nothing, just took his sweater off and wrapped it around your waist. Naturally, you turnd around gave him a questioning look so his whispered in your ear.

"Honey, you might wanna check your pants." His hands gently massaged your hips, he knew when cycle was every month so he had extra pants, panties and pads/tampons in his Jeep.

"Oh, my god." The embarressment shone in your voice but his hands on you hips helped soothe the sinking feeling.

"It's okay, let me pay for this and you head to the restroom. We can shop still if you'd like after." He spoke so sweetly and so kindly, Dick pulled out his wallet and picked up the item you'd been debating on wanting for the last half hour.

"Go...I got this, Sweet Girl." His blue eyes peered into the depth of yours with soft reassurance before you went to go check your pants.

Jason: You huffed and grumbled as he fixed his bike, handing him a torque wrench. You grumbled again and his green eyes shot up after hearing the noise over and over.

"Angel, what's got you huffing and puffing like a damn steam train?" He asks cause he's tired of hearing you groaning.

"I'm hungry, Jay!" You whined as you watched him tighten.

"I love you but quit bitching and get some food." You were hangry, he could tell. Jason grabbed his phone and handed it to you.

"Order something...and get me something too." He got up and washed his hands as you ordered food.

"All you had to do was ask to use my card, Babygirl." He came back over to you and hoisted you over his shoulder to carry you to his room. Jason placed you on the bed and plugged in your heating pad.

"I can do it myself, Jay." You felt bad for him doing all this and paying for your food.

"Shut up and relax." He demanded as his hands found your lower abdomen as he massaged the sore area, between his hands and the warm pad he had you feeling a lot better.

Once the food got there, the both of you scarfed it down, with food in your belly you were much less grouchy and much more tired. Jason laid with you and the both of you took a nap, he could use it from this tireless patrols and you for obvious reasons.

Strong and firm hands kept rubbing at your sore and angry abdomen as the both of you slipped off to a relaxing nap.

Bruce: Bruce wasnt good with periods and such. He often found himself in his own little world normally, saving Gotham and playing Billionare wasnt easy but he saw how much you shifted in your seat during the Wayne Enterprises board meeting.

Being his assistant was usually nice but right now it was hell listening to men talk about stocks and figuratively compare wallets to try to gain favor of the man you love.

He wasnt interested mostly in their shit and before you knew it, Bruce quietly excused you and quietly told you to get whatever you needed from the little period bag he had in his office, take ibuprofen and maybe a nap. You were about to disagree when he cut you off...

"Now, Mr. L/N." He demanded, Bruce was always formal with you when others were around due to being only his "employee." Bruce had to stay in the meeting as a formality, you knew that.

You were gonna disagree to his order but he wasnt gonna budge, plus your back was aching, your cramps could put Doomsday out of commision so you went to his office. Finding yourself heating up the warming bad then took pain meds and took a nap.

Bruce returned an hour later and covered you up with a blanket, his hands slipped to your heels and slowly took them off, his fingers moved to your waist and unzipped your skirt slightly at the top to relieve some pressure before he got back to answering emails and such.

Tim: You had got up and didnt even notice the blood you'd left on his sheets due to the feeling of blood in your shorts, Your eyes shot open as you bolted to the bathroom with embarressment to wash out the shorts and to hope blood didn't drip down your thighs.

Tim's eyes slowly opened and he noticed the blood. It was normal, he knew that so he started cleaning it up immediately after you got out of bed. Blood was blood and he wasnt squeamish in the slight. He'd had your spit and throw up on him, blood was nothing.

Tim popped on a pot of coffee for himself, got you new panties, sleep pants and a shirt cause changing fully sometimes just felt better and fresher, Pajamas of course. Tim knew every womans wants to be comfy during her period.

Tim knocked on the bathroom door and asked to come in, you said yes. He barely cracked it open to hand you clothes which made your eyes well up a bit because he did it without even needing to be asked, you hadn't even gotten the chance to think about needing these. He did it on his own... He closed the door and returned to the room where he stripped the bed and cleaned the previous, they were spotless by the time he was done.

He then got the stache of candy he had for you out of the cabinets, then the little plushie that went in the microwave for your cramps. Tim was always secretly prepared and swift in the way he tool care of you and did it like a cake walk in the park.

Damian: "Dami, Can you pick me up pads/tampons?" You had ran out and the period underwear you did have were overly uncomfy, you had meant to new pairs last month but forgot.

"Okay." He texted as he normally did when you responded but it was almost a automated reponse he had.

"Okay? You don't even know what size and brand etc." You asked via text.

"Okay." He texted back, he was clearly busy but you really needed pads or something so you called him.

"Hello?" He was out of breath and clearly punching and kicking someone.

"I need pads or something, please get some on the way home." You pleaded with him.

"Okay, Y/N." He responded as his mind was currently on something else...Of course he didnt buy any before coming home. You went out to him to get him cause these underwear were pinching you.

"What?" He noticed the look in your eye like you were looking for something and he didnt know what so he spoke in a confused tone.

"Pads, tampons, anything?" You were clearly so desperate and uncomfortable.

"Oh, I- Beloved, I got wrapped up in things. I can go out and get you some." He remembered you saying something but it went in and out his ears. Damian actually sounded sorry but you werent in the mood for Damian's apologies.

You padded down to Tim's room to ask for some, for Tim being more into dudes most of the time he sure was prepared for if he ever had a girl over. Damian broufht you home chocolate and flowers the next day and from then on always made sure the bathroom stayed stocked after that also he made sure to recheck his texts on his way home for if you needed something.

-> Masterlist <- -> Prompt List <-

[confusedshades]

Jason and Dick were sparring in the cave when a portal opened up. Dick and Jason flipped to confront whoever it was that had summoned the portal while the Batcave alarms shrieked in the background about intruders. Jason however recognised the portal and stood down. "Hey Danny. Thought I wasn't due for another session until next month." Jason called out to the teenager? Young adult? Who floated out of the portal. Dick eased out of his position and walked over to the Batcomputer to silence the alarms.

The last shriek had barely faded before the cave door slammed open and Tim came bolting down the stairs while Bruce and Damian - who'd barely left for early patrol came screeching back in the Batmobile. "Friendly presence." Dick called out as he walked down to the lower levels where everyone was. "Jason's friend came over suddenly is all." Jason was still talking to the person and both had ignored everything around them, but hearing the questioning lilt to the word friend they both snorted and turned to everyone else.

"Hi, I'm Phantom." The - teenager? Young adult? Dick was having a hard time figuring out the person's age - person introduced themselves with a wave. "I'm the prince in training for the infinite realms and one of the duties I have is fixing time stream nonsense and ectoplasmic leakages, poisonings, etc. it's why I'm here."

Dick thought of Wally and Barry and winced. "If you're looking for one of the Flashes, they're not here; not sure what ectoplasmic leakages would even look like so can't help you there." Dick could feel Batman's glare at the easy share of information but he ignored it. If Jason trusted this Phantom, then that was enough for him.

Jason huffed a half laugh and shook his head. "Pits are ectoplasmic leakages. Phantom's been treating me for what we call Pit rage but is basically ectoplasmic poisoning. In exchange Ra's has been loosing his Pits throughout the world - some explosively some just mysteriously." For however freely the words were offered, Dick noticed how he kept shooting looks to Batman's grim countenance. He'd turned into a brooding looming statue where he stood. Given Damian standing almost shoulder to shoulder, the transformation was almost everyday now.

Robin had just nodded as if this was information he already had. "There are no Pits in Gotham Phantom. What brings you here today?" Dick mentally cheered - Damian's attack first ask questions later behaviour had been on the mend lately and everytime he was more polite and not aggressive, Dick took it for a win.

Phantom, Danny Dick suddenly remembered Jason calling him, just shifted. "Not here for a ectoplasmic leakage or one of the Flashes - Clocky can take care of those idiots himself. I'm here because Red there needs an anchor." When Danny gestured to Tim, everyone turned to look at him.

Tim for his part, blinks. "Uh what? I don't live on a boat anymore so if you're here for an anchor for that, I don't need it?" Dick frowned. He recognised what Tim was doing, he'd seen that technique of teenage naivete and misunderstanding pulled out at various social functions before he pulled off whatever maneuver he had planned to take the other party off guard. Businessmen, CEOs, rogues - they all fell to it. But the reason it worked? Tim always knew what they were talking about.

"Tim?" Dick asked. "Why would you need an anchor?" When Tim opened his mouth, Dick cut him off. "A non boat anchor?" Tim obediently closed his mouth and looked away mulishly.

Phantom coughed awkwardly. "Um, we can talk about it privately given the medical aspect of it if you prefer." When Tim nodded, he and Phantom went to the corner where all sounds were naturally deadened. While they had their own whispered conversation, Robin moved to Jason's side. "Has mother contacted you recently akhi?"

Dick left them to their own conversation and turned to see Bruce still scowling. "Oh come off it B. Jason recognised them immediately and you know Jason doesn't trust easily. If he trusts them, that's good enough for me."

"hn." Was the only grunt Dick got for his trouble, but after decades of Batmanese he knew it meant I don't like it but you're right.

----

"I'm not accepting an anchor Phantom. I told you last time too. There's too much to be done and getting older isn't going to help." Tim hissed as he crossed his arms angrily.

Danny just sighed. "Dude, if I don't do it soon, you'll become unglued. As in the next timeline shenanigans you get pulled into might turn catastrophic."

Tim just huffed. "So you've said. I've got contingencies in place for that. Do you have one for keeping Batman tethered?"

Danny scowled. "Yes I do. It's called therapy."

"Good luck getting him to accept it." Tim muttered.

When Danny Phantom appears in the Batcave, everyone expects he's there for Jason. Whether to cleanse him of Lazarus water, or pull him into the afterlife it depends on the person, but what no one expects is that he's there for Tim.

Meanwhile, Danny doesn't mind dealing with some ectopoisoning while he's in the neighborhood, but the real reason Clockwork sent him to Gotham is to retether Red Robin to the time stream so he can finally age to adulthood. He has spent way too long as a teenager, and no one seems to be noticing.

[kammazi]

★ katsuki and yourself weren’t big drinkers. sure after you two had graduated, you had gone to a few parties here and there but you were never a fan of the whole spinning dizzy feeling that alcohol brought with it, especially since you two are heroes. patrolling while hungover under the heat of the hot summer sun was dreadful.

so when you get a call from katsuki one evening while you were on patrol saying how kirishimas and the rest of the guys were going out for a few, who were you to say no? even though you knew the invitation for yourself always stood, katsuki needed some time for himself and by the time you would get off patrol it would already be past midnight.

so after exchanging some ‘i love you’s’, you disconnected the call and got back to whatever strolling you were doing.

and as the night went on you got more and more notifications that buzzed in your back pocket from who you assumed was your boyfriend. you eventually had a quick break and chugged an energy drink while fishing for your phone.

you let out a snort of laughter and looked around to make sure no one heard you before looking back down at your screen. there you saw multiple pictures took by denki of him standing on what you assumed was a stool while taking 0.5 picture’s of katsuki. what made you laugh even more was his flushed face and droopy eyes that held no fight in them as he stood there with his hands by his sides.

you could tell that he had drank quite a bit and as your break came to an end you had a short two hours left of your shift before you were able to finally get home and most likely take care of your said boyfriend.

and you were correct because as soon as you even such as stepped in through the doors of your shared apartment your phone once again started buzzing, this time it was a call.

“hello?” there was a shuffling noise before shouting hit your eardrums along with the music that blasted in the background.

“HEYY LOOK, ARE YOU-” you grimaced as you hear a glass breaking alongside some yelling. “huh? hello?”

the phone was picked back up. “THIS IS KIRISHIMA, KATSUKI IS KINDA REALLY DRUNK AND-” you then heard a whooshing sound and another crash. you stood there looking at your phone and then brining it close to your ear again. “uhh..kiri..shima?”

you heard the phone being picked up and panting into the microphone. “SORRY I JUST LAUNCHED MY PHONE HALFWAY ACROSS THE DANCE FLOOR AND IT HIT SOMEONE IN THE FACE.” you had to physically distance yourself from the phone before answering.

“kiri you don’t have to yell i can hear you!” you felt as if it was a screaming competition at that point. you heard a cackle before kirishimas finally got to the point.

“sorry, sorry! it’s just that bakubro got hella drunk and he’s kinda unmovable right now. he keeps saying your name and won’t really listen to anyone, would it be alright if you could come and pick him up?”

you were already picking up your keys and sliding on your shoes. “of course, be there in five.”

and so here you were pulling into the parking spot outside of the front doors of the building.

as you stepped in, you already felt exhaustion hitting you as you strolled around to try and find your boyfriend and those goons.

and then you saw him, sitting in a corner seat, with a cute sleepy look on his face, arms still crossed as always. kneeling in front of him, you saw denki, sero and kiri sitting across as they helped gather his stuff. you placed a palm against his face and patted his knee with the other.

“kats, love?” he groaned and slightly opened his eyes. “hey i’m gonna take you home okay?” and then suddenly, he moves his face away from your hand as his face held something like a mix of disgust and offence.

“get those damn hands away from me. i’ve a girlfriend.” although his speech was slurred you blinked before letting out a chuckle as the guys behind you hollered and stumbled over eachother.

you raised a brow, amused to see him act that way. “oh really? sorry about that kats, i won’t do it again.” his face whipped around to face you as he grimaced again. “oi. don’t call me that. only she can and you ain’t her.. so back off...” his sentence held no malicious intent as his head slowly tipped back. “where is she. i miss her.”

kirishima then came up next to you and patted his back. “bro shes right here! see?” in response to his words, katsuki raised his head and squinted at you for a while before slowly smiling. “heyy it’s my girlfriend.” immediately his head landed on your shoulder. he started babbling as he wrapped his arms around your frame, almost knocking you to the floor from the sudden weight. in the meantime, you glanced at his red headed friend.

“i’m sorry how much did he drink?” in response he scratched the back of his neck before holding up three fingers. “JESUS KIRI THREE BOTTLES?” kirishimas shook his head before cackling. “three drinks.”

now you knew your boyfriend was a lightweight but this was a tad too funny to you, not that you would ever tell him.. obviously.

with the help of kirishima, you managed to walk out a stumbling katsuki and just about sat him in the passenger seat before strapping him in as he babbled on about how much he missed you. sero and denki handed over his wallet and phone to you and you thanked them before saying your goodbyes as you sat behind the wheel.

on the drive back katsuki acted like he hadn’t seen you in months by the way he held your hand and kissed it every two seconds. with him telling you how much he loved you and how beautiful you where. in that moment you could not only feel somewhat giddy but be thankful for having this man in your life. no matter how tough he looked or acted, it really was true that he was a softy, drunk or not.

after arriving, getting him into bed wasn’t even a problem. he listened to your every word as he clung to you like a koala. you helped him brush his teeth on the toilet seat as you sat on his lap. even while drunk, his grip was still firm but gentle.

you then got him changed, him getting stuck in his t-shirt a few times, and you both finally climbed into bed. there was pure silence other that his quiet snores as he rested on your chest. as expected, he ended up passing out the second he wrapped his arms around you.

as you pressed a kiss on his forehead, you could once again feel the wave of exhaustion crashing over you as the warm pressure of katsuki’s body lulled you to sleep.

and in the morning katsuki awoke with not only a headache but also a lovely picture of his drunken state as a 0.5 printed and framed photo hanging in the living room as a forever reminder of that night.

[blackbirdsblackberries]

I Hate The New Hero!

Pt 8: The Trapeze Artist's Fall

Pt 1 - Pt 2 - Pt 3 - Pt 4 - Pt 5 - Pt 6 - Pt 7 - Pt 8 (You're here) - Pt 9 - Pt 10

It was his second week of school for him. In no way was he excited. Gotham was a fresh start for the young boy, private school was meant to be a fun experience - many would kill to be able to get premium education - but he finds he misses the countryside hills that he'd watch pass by as his mamă taught him how to spell and read. He misses his tată teaching him math and cool sciencey things.

He misses his family.

The school wasn't the problem, though he found he was falling behind in learning due to his homeschooled life beforehand. The problem was his classmates, the ridicule he'd get for simple slip-ups. It wasn't his fault English is his second language, it isn't his fault he slips-up.

Last Friday one boy in the class, Mac Doust, had put gum in his hair. Dick ended up crying in the bathroom until Alfred came to pick him up - not Bruce, no, Bruce was as unavailable as Dick's dead parents honestly.

Gripping the straps of his backpack Dick mutters under his breath, trying to assure himself he'd be okay. The whole weekend he had practiced hiding his accent so kids would think he was normal.

Upon walking into the school he held his head high and didn't mess around, he headed straight to class.

...

That's strange, why was the door only opened partly? Ms Xavier keeps the door wide open, always greeting Dick with a wide smile and some Romanian she had put in the effort of learning for him.

Dick opens the door hesitantly, peeking inside.

He only gets to see Mac's stupid grin before water is dumped on him, the metal bucket clanging on his head harshly.

He doesn't know what to do, he stands there, the bucket on his head as the sounds of giggles and cackles fill his ears. Warm tears contrast with the cold water soaking his face.

Dick went home early that day. The incident struck a chord in him. If he wanted to stop the bullying he had to become better than them, put in the work and effort.

He will be popular, he will be better.

He will never do that cruel prank to anyone. Never

Looking down at his phone as he walks he feels nothing but a cringing sort of pain. He stooped to a level he never thought he'd get to. It was disgusting really.

Dick feels like he's no better than Mac. That he's no hero. The video plays on loop as the man takes in the pained look on your face, he can't bring himself to look at the messages in the group chat.

They're most likely supporting it, congratulating him for doing what they all wished to do.

Hell, if he was in their place he'd probably be celebrating it too. But to be there, to be the reason you reacted that way, is sickening for the young male.

Even now all he can think about is himself, how he feels. God, how self-centered could he be? It's not like he was the victim in this.. But still, surely he can't be the true bad guy in this, right?

Dick had decided against getting driven home, he felt that if he walked to the manor in the rain it'd be enough to be even with you - look, we both ended up soaked! Everything's better now!

He chuckles under his breath at his thoughts - what would Aranea even think of him?

She'd probably be angry at him for his actions but comfort him, telling him the things he needed to hear. That it wasn't his fault, that Y/N was a bad person who deserved it.

Whatever words needed so he could sleep at night really..

Dick finally decides to exit the looping video, the image of you burnt into his mind forever.

He goes into his messages and pulls up Aranea's comm number - he had put it into his phone so they could talk off shift, something she was hesitant about but ultimately caved in.

He types out a simple message. Then another. Then another.

"Heyyyy!!! Are you busy rn??"

"It'd be cool to hang out and patrol together!!"

"Bruce doesn't have to know"

He stares at the messages, waiting for them to be marked as read. 1 minute turned into 5, then 5 turned into 10. Dick sighs and exits out of the message log, clearly Aranea is busy.

He gazes on the chat log "Y/N. 🤮"

Maybe he should message her? Say sorry and try to make it up to her.. Yeah, that's what Aranea would say to do! She was always about communication.

"I know you're probably upset, I get that. I'm super sorry for what I did|

"I know you're probably upset, I get that. I'm|

"I know you're|

"What I did wasn't right. I'm sorry that I did that because you had a different opinion than me. I never meant to make you cry, only angry, I promise!"

Finally happy with the message he sends it off.

Only to remember the wonderful fact that your phone is fried due to the water.

Lucky him. He sighs, fed up with this bad luck streak he's been having.

Suddenly he remembers that he has money! More than you can even imagine!

He can buy a new, amazing phone to make things even. Yes, it's perfect. Surely you'll forgive him now!

He changes course and heads to the nearest electronic store, determined to make things right in his head. The purchase was swift and quick, the best phone he could find in the place.

Now, all he had to do was go to your apartment and give it to you!

Lucky him Tim leaked your address to everyone in the family as soon as he entered your apartment. So, with a high head he makes the slightly anxiety-inducing journey to you.

Knocking on the door of the apartment Dick stands straight as a board. The door opens and on the other side is a woman, she has severe eye bags and (H/C) hair. She seemed to have just gotten back from work. Her grey, lifeless eyes peer at him with suspicion before realizing who he was and smiling brightly.

"Mr Grayson! What a pleasure, is there anything you need?" She asks, Dick internally cringes, there was something about her voice that just grated against his ears.

There was just something so... Off... About her.

Still, he does what he usually does. He smiles and remains patient.

"Hello ma'am, is your daughter available? Something had happened and well.." Dick trails off, he doesn't want to get on Y/N's mother's bad side.

Her mother's eyes seem to cloud over at the mention of an incident, yet her smile remains in tact, if not strained. It's possible you told her already..

"Oh. An incident? What has she done, Mr Grayson?" Her mother asks, dark undertones coat her otherwise curious words. Dick furrows his brows slightly at the sudden change in the woman's mood. "Ah, well, it was my fault. I had played a nasty prank on her and her phone was ruined, I bought a new one to make it up to her!" He shows the brand new phone in it's box.

The woman doesn't look impressed, still, she smiles and hums. "Hm. Well that's lovely! Would you like to come inside? She isn't home currently but I'm sure she'll be home soon."

Something in Dick tells him not to go inside. Something was wrong. Yet, he reminds himself that he is a hero, if anything happens he will be prepared.

So, he heads inside, trailing behind the woman as he takes in the dungeon-like interior. "It's a... Lovely place, ma'am" Dick says, hoping to seem polite. The woman scoffs.

"M/N, my name is M/N. No need for such formalities!" The woman hurriedly states before flicking her hand dismissively "Y/N's room is the second door. You can wait there, or, if you want, you can hang around me!" She smiles sweetly, too sweetly, disgustingly sweetly. It reminds him of eating giant spoons of brown sugar.

He smiles politely, trying not to show his discomfort. "I'll just wait in her room for her..!" He hurries to Y/N's room, shutting the door once he's in. That woman gave him the creeps.

He looks around the small room, holy shit, no wonder you're always so pissy! He'd be pissy too if his room was just a bit bigger than a school storage closet!

The man knows he shouldn't snoop, he's done enough damage. But, maybe, if the guilt doesn't settle he can use information gathered here to help!

Dick makes his way to the chest and looks around, picking up an engineering bit, he isn't too into the whole mechanical side of things so there was no name he could pin it to.

Placing it back he moves to sit on the bed and wait. As he sits on the bed his eyes are drawn to a floorboard that seems to stand out from the rest. He kneels on the floor and digs his nails into the floorboard.

He starts to lift it up when..

RINGGGG

RINGGGG

RINGGGG

His phone goes off, he scrambles to answer the call, not checking who the caller was.

"Dick? Dick, okay, you're the only one that has answered!"

It was Duke, he sounds frantic. What happened..?

"Duke? What's going on? Is everything okay?"

"No, no, something bad's happened! Steph, Cass and I were at a cafe and Y/N and her friends were there as well but some waitress had messed up the orders and Y/N had an allergic reaction - or something like that!" Duke rambles, his words slurring together in a rush.

Dick's eyes widen and he feels the air leave his lungs, forgetting about the floorboard and quickly leaving the room. He'll put the new phone on your bed for when you return.

He brushes past M/N and leaves the apartment. Holy shit your luck was bad, he couldn't help but think.

"Okay, stay calm, are you guys at Gotham City Private Hospital or Gotham City Public Hospital?"

"Private."

"I'll be there in half an hour, it'll be okay."

With that he hangs up and runs out of the apartment complex.

Like hell was he about to let anything bad happen to you before he could make things right!

Taglist:

@rissareader @delias-stuff @hogwarts9 @marsmabe @randomlyappearingartist @coralaura @nervousalpacalady @citrushalo @chericia @soriansick @v0idl1nq @scrumdidiliyumyum @kittykatcreatster @feral-childs-word @anon34570 @shycreatorreview @sunny-sp3lls @fluffypackofships @cynniee @yuyuzi-ling @coffeeaddictxd @starryperson @readermommy @niggrrooo @bunbunboysworld @yanrandom @fluffypackofchips @vanilliona @wizzerreblogs @cens0r3d

[sweetvanilla222]

Pick a Card ⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆

a christmas miracle coming into the light during 2025

please pick however you'd like. the goal is for it to resonate with something that is truly meaningful to you ♡

cards made by me <3

pile 1 - candy cane ⋆⁺₊❅.

keywords: peppermint, fresh, spicy, cinnamon, early morning, duality, frequent movement, wake up, coolness, being in charge, effort, fireplace, strong faith

i'm going to describe the energy that i feel for this pile, if it sounds like you, that is great, it's extra confirmation. if it doesn't really sound like you, it's intended to be the energy behind your wish or wishes and the making of them. for example, i describe an energy that is "fresh, cool, and firey", you could say, i don't see how that applies to me, but in terms of the energy behind a wish coming true, it'd be something that's fresh (innovative), cool (has a lot of appeal), and firey (you are passionate about this thing). so anyhow, we'll see how it plays out!

i am getting an energy about someone who's fired up about life. energetically, they are feeling, and are aware that things are speeding up for them. things are moving, shifting around. progress is "finally" being made i heard. getting the imagery of being frozen at a stop sign. whatever wish this is, you may have thought yourself less-involved than you actually can be. like before, in your heard there was no way you could have controlled this. i think you're taking charge of some things in regards to this situation, making a bit of a plan. it doesn't have to be this huge, well-thought out, detailed master-plan. no matter how big or small the details are, you are trying to figure them out. this would be the ideal energy to attain your wish. figure out some details, sit down and simply put thought into it. not just intention, which i'm getting that you're already good at. setting up tasks for yourself, some sort of to-do list, and again it doesn't need to be anything special or extreme, and should certainly not stress you out. it should feel right, and you should give yourself the space to go at your own pace. consistency is not about showing up perfectly every time, it's just about showing up. giving it a shot. and doing it for YOU and what's important to you. now, we are talking about miracles here, so i want to really emphasize the following point. you taking charge of one chunk of the situation, and having to put in effort should not scare you that this blessing will not be as beautiful or magical. i totally get that, but i think the ego is just so reliant on doing anything but having a balanced mindset. you can be responsible and hard-working while also being a hopeful, joyful, spiritual person. it's about doing what you can in the 3D (and knowing that your intuition and instincts will always guide you), then trusting that the 5D will embellish, decorate, and add pretty ornaments to your wish. it will be better than you think. i'm getting that this "miracle" will be very memorable. it will linger for a long time in your heart. it will extend it's stay in your mind. a very beautiful and welcoming energy. OK, now the tarot!

what is the miracle?

two of pentacles, the empress, eight of wands

this miracle is something where you have more of a choice. i'm specifically getting the example of a home. a better living situation. a better environment. where you have more opportunities to do things yourself and bring your own creations to life. definitely the energy of being in a place (physically) where you feel stuck and blocked and like you're lacking options, and this miracle is the opposite of that. so it could be a new home, or some sort of alignment where you find something that feels like home, i'm also getting a very harmonious relationship. i am getting the energy of a child, birth, fertility take that how it resonates. if you have wanted to start your own business from scratch, it could be the miracle of having it be very abudant. it does feel like anything where you truly feel blessed and you recognize it, and feel lots of gratitude over the situation. whatever it is, i am getting that it's a physical miracle type thing. like i said, a home, a relationship, a business, a birth.

how is it going to happen?

knight of wands, page of swords

it's interesting because as i was shuffling, i got the message that i should tell you that there is no rush. but with the cards, i'm getting that this is happening quickly. so i think you have the freedom to adjust to what feels right to you day-to-day when you're setting goals that are related to your wish. you can really go at your own pace, and try your best, and it feels like this miracle will happen quickly after that. it's like your guides just want you to start getting used to more responsibilities, so you can really see this thing come into fruition, as well as so you can enjoy it even more!

how is it going to feel?

knight of pentacles, wheel of fortune, ace of swords

it's going to feel like such a good, positive shift. it'll feel lucky, it'll feel like a complete turning point in your life. because of this, i'm sensing that you'll be able to see just how many doors you hold the key to. you can worry about a lot less, and you are more aware of your direct control over things. it is rewarding, and your hard work will feel so fulfilling. you'll want to just hug yourself and celebrate yourself. you've been patient. you will have this miracle to rely on. it's something you can turn to in difficult times.

those are all your messages pile 1 <3 thank you so much for being here, happy holidays! may your 2025 be full of beautiful things!

pile 2 - gingerbread ⋆⁺₊❅.

keywords: sweet, delight, cookie, frosted, smiling, cute, fizzy drinks, soft approaches, passive, the little things, gratitude, sunny disposition, here for the ride, taking it slow

i'm going to describe the energy that i feel for this pile, if it sounds like you, that is great, it's extra confirmation. if it doesn't really sound like you, it's intended to be the energy behind your wish or wishes and the making of them. for example, i describe an energy that is "cute, delightful, and slow", you could say, i don't see how that applies to me, but in terms of the energy behind a wish coming true, it'd be something that's cute (heart warming), delightful (full of enjoyment), and slow (calming, grounding). that's an example. anyhow, we'll see how it plays out!

i get such a delightful energy from this pile. a person who is bubbly-hearted. tender. i was getting cancer and taurus energy from this energy. some random things i channeled were having a baking talent, or some sort of undiscovered talent! perhaps in 2025 you will be finding out how very good you are at something at you never even knew it! such an awesome message. i was getting the message that you're going to go very far with your dreams. you can do so much with your beautiful imagination and the way you perceive the world. "you can make your world your wonderland". i also heard "wish times a million". was getting imagery of lots of shiny, pretty things. gold, diamonds, pearls. also got "pearly whites" and "pearly gates". and that you're "heaven sent" (this could also be that your miracle is heaven-sent, as in so angelic and blissful). this was random but i was hearing "good care" & "good career" ?? perhaps it means that if you take good care of yourself -- your body, mind, spirit, your career will go very well too. it's like what you give to your body will be given to you in return by the universe in plenty <3 very sweet message! it could also be confirmation for those of you who work taking care of people in general! alright, time for the tarot!

what is the miracle?

five of cups in reverse, four of swords, the hierophant

if you have been seeking some sort of guidance related to your well-being, i am getting a positive confirmation. if you've wanted a deeper spiritual connection, or a space/community to discuss spirituality, definitely am getting that energy. it feels like reaching a very beautiful point in a healing journey, that you can overcome the difficult times and at last get to the fulfilling parts. "learning to appreciate what you have made for yourself, rather than focusing on what has departed". a miracle that is happening for you is you will have a lot of things to be thankful for which i'm getting that you couldn't in the past. you will have time to recover and relax after a long journey. maybe you've been really looking for time to just sit with yourself. maybe going on some sort of spiritual retreat? that could be your miracle. i think you're getting a time in your life where you can feel very close to yourself and your spirituality and just feel very connected. i would expect magical things, lots of healing, and peaceful times!

how is it going to happen?

ten of cups, nine of swords in reverse

ok, very interesting. getting the feeling that this miracle is going to happen because something very special, intricate, and of much significance is happening to you. something very beautiful and having that sort of "this is everything i wanted" energy to it. this will be out of the blue, and is not something you consciously bring into life. it happens to you. and this is so interesting because it's like. when this happens, you may have a huge light-bulb moment of like. "did this seriously just happen?" and it leads you to the miracle of realizing what you have. and this pushes you into this beautiful newfound sense of appreciation for life and a deepened spirituality. it's like your heart bursts open because this great thing happened to you and is looking at your mind like "yeah bro, i'm not going to diminish my achievements or the beauty in my life anymore. let me celebrate this thing". it's so difficult for me to explain it so i hope you understand what i'm saying?? for example, let's say i get blessed with a soulmate very randomly. and then after a bit of reflection, i'm like oh. wow. this just happened to me? and something in me just decides i can and want to rejoice over it. and can rejoice over many other things. it's something like this, but it'll be very specific for everyone in this little collective. so as to how it will happen, it feels like it's directly connected to your healing journey, but this is just an epiphany you get because something good comes into your life and you are decisive towards being more appreciative towards it.

how is it going to feel?

the hanged man, five of wands, ten of wands in reverse

it's going to feel like your perspective has completely changed. which makes lots of sense seeing as what you're receiving is a newfound sense of appreciation! have you guys ever realized that you have a new favorite food? or discovered a new snack that just changes your life? it's like that. and it stays for a long time. it's a combination of having something good to look forward to every day, and being content just as you are. it will also enhance your way of approaching all things in your life. you can more calmly approach things, with more joy, with more wisdom. such a beautiful way of living. it's like opening your eyes to this beautiful underwater paradise. the imagery i got was a barbie mermaid movie. so it could very much be like looking at the world with a child-like wonder. so special and unique and like no other. instead of being worn out by obstacles, i'm seeing a more analytical rather than emotional approach to them. you will be maintaining things in order, and not have the burden of results on your shoulders. it's doing things because you want to. overcoming things because you want to. moving forward because you want to. you're just okay with your circumstances no matter what, and are not so rigid in your way of thinking. it's an expanded heart, leading to an expanded heart. congratulations on this beautiful new cycle pile two!! i'm so delighted for you, it was really amusing to read this energy hehe

thank you so much for being here, take care, and happy holidays !! may 2025 fill your heart with blessings and love <3

pile 3 - snow ⋆⁺₊❅.

keywords: cold, dazzling, retreat, home, snuggle, cozy up, red wine, vintage films, laughter, blankets, hot beverages (tea, hot choco, atole, champurrado, drinks specifically from your culture, hot milk)

i'm going to describe the energy that i feel for this pile, if it sounds like you, that is great, it's extra confirmation. if it doesn't really sound like you, it's intended to be the energy behind your wish or wishes and the making of them. for example, i describe an energy that is "cute, delightful, and slow", you could say, i don't see how that applies to me, but in terms of the energy behind a wish coming true, it'd be something that's cute (heart warming), delightful (full of enjoyment), and slow (calming, grounding). that's an example. anyhow, we'll see how it plays out!

i'm getting that you're the person that people look for in a crowded room. like people want you. i think you have a strong inner compass, and i'm also getting that a lot of people's compasses lead to you. "where you lead, i will follow" type of feeling. so perhaps you are a very leader-like person. the position you hold in people's lives is quite significant here! i think you're a person who generally requires lots of rest n' relaxtion. treating yourself is significant. i'm getting that you are very hopeful. imagery of doors opening to bright light. connection, true bonds, and shared warmth seem to be of importance. let's see what miracle is coming your way!

what is the miracle?

the empress, the sun

your miracle is related to material abundance as well as creativity. the first way to look at it as that your creative projects / something you created yourself straight from your imagination could be getting recognized and becoming a "fountain of success". a very giving project. something that feels very gratifying and joyful. i think it's even more joyous because you had your participation in it. and it feels like a confident moment of "i did it!". whatever fits this sort of description and resonates with you will be it. it feels like a career transformation, a financial transformation, something like this will be your miracle! look out for white horses, i think they'll be a positive sign for you :D

how is it going to happen?

two of pentacles, the hanged man, six of cups

your miracle will happen with a combination of "work and play". a balance between the two. a balance between using your brain and heart. a balance between responsibility and child-like wonder. i really get the sense that it's all your doing, and it feels natural to accomplish this. this could be something you've wanted for a really long time. a stability of sorts. a "coming-together" aspect of your life. it will take some sort of change in your perspective, and i'm seeing that it has to do with leaning in more towards balance than anything else. if you've spent too long thinking very logically, this would be leaning more into your enjoyment, imagination, and creativity. it could be the same thing vice versa, you've been "too chill" and "playing" more than anything, so now you're organizing yourself. whatever it is, you can get closer to your miracle by seeking out balance. since it is a miracle, it feels like the universe will be thanking you for balance that you make for yourself, so maybe you start a new self-care routine and a schedule to get your goals done, and the universe blesses you with a gift in return <3 that is what i'm getting

how is it going to feel?

nine of pentacles, ace of cups

beautiful!! this is the most exciting part of the reading for me, and i immediately feel that specifically for you, it will feel especially great. it's gonna feel so, so good. you will feel very abundant whenever this happens. you'll be able to really treat yourself, and take a well-deserved break. maybe go on a dream-vacation. we have an overflowing cup so i think it'll be a significant place you reach with your life situation where you are able to see how positively things have changed for you. you can recognize how good you are doing. all around you are beautiful things, and you can see them! it is a new, wonderful start-up for you!

pile 3, those are all of your messages. thank you very much for being here. may your 2025 be full of beautiful things and lots of light!

[koalapastries-writes]

*coughcough* lando/kimi/ollie/oscar/lance/yuki (separate not polyam lol) and their reactions to a) reader leaving them limping and b) readers back being a scratched up MESS

(sorry if this is too much 🤪)

love ya (hehehehehehehe) 😘

-bear ❤️

love you bear <3

under cut bc nsfw. obviously.

kimi antonelli:

at first he's soooooo bitter about not being able to walk normally

he's cussing you out in italian under his breath

i mean he literally told you he wanted you to go as hard as you could

but he doesn't like dealing with the consequences of his actions

he's making the most exaggerated wincing faces whenever he passes you with his limp

you don't say anything for a while

but when he starts being too much of a brat

you'll take your shirt off and turn around to show him the deep red lines going down the length of your back

kimi's blushing like crazy but

he's also proud

like yeah

his bf is so good you got him to do THAT to you without even knowing it

lance stroll:

i've said it before and i'll say it again

lance is a princess

more than that, he's your princess

which means you leave him limping frequently, and he leaves intricately scratched patterns on your back just as often

he'll be so whiny and demanding about it but in a cute way?

like he doesn't really need much. he asks you to lie down on your stomach while he takes a picture of your back for his collection, asks you to carry him to the sofa and get him some food

and then he's pretty content to watch a tv show while you do whatever because he can still see you

the only hard and fast rule is that you must never wear a shirt at home when your back's scratched up

be proud of his work please and thank you

lando norris:

brat

you know how the most pampered dog in existence sighs like he's had the most terribly horrible pathetic life

that's what lando does

he'll sleep later than you, so you're already dressed by the time he wakes up

you bring him breakfast in bed, kiss his forehead, make sure his water is still cold, and let him ramble to you about whatever strange dream he had the night before like you always do

but then he'll shift and feel that ache (totally whines about how unfair it is that something that feels soooo good can then make him feel bad things. calls it a sex hangover)

and he'll definitely drop food on your shirt specifically

neither of you know how it always hits you and not him but lando's certainly not complaining

breakfast in bed + his boyfriends gorgeous body? what more could a guy want

immediately shuts up and stops being obnoxious when he sees how he's basically shredded your back

k bear i'm gonna ask you to send me this again with ollie oscar and yuki bc i wanna get this out now as a thank you for helping tonight but i am also almost falling asleep at my computer 💔 i will definitely write the other half, just ... when i can see the keyboard again lol

[geotjwrs]

Can you do emma myers x mreader, where reader is younger than emma and clingy to her plss

easy, tiger

Pairings ; Emma Myers x Male Reader

Warning/s ; none

You’re nestled against Emma on the couch, her arm slung around your shoulders like it’s meant to be there. She’s here at your place tonight, and you’re taking full advantage of the rare downtime, your favorite show playing on the TV in front of you. Emma was skeptical when you’d convinced her to watch it with you—she’s not exactly into the same chaotic plots and characters you are. But now, you can tell she’s hooked, eyes never leaving the screen.

You lean into her a little more, grinning as you try to gauge her reaction. “You’re enjoying this, admit it.”

Emma raises an eyebrow, giving you a sideways glance that’s all amusement. “Maybe,” she says, her tone playful. “Or maybe I just like watching you get this excited over it.” She lifts her hand to ruffle your hair, making you groan but secretly loving it. She knows that—she always knows, somehow.

As the episode goes on, you start sharing every little thought that crosses your mind, narrating the backstory of characters, giving little spoilers for things that happen later in the season, and laughing every time Emma gives you a mock-glare for ruining the surprises.

Emma laughs, squeezing your shoulder. “Alright, alright, you’re way too into this.” But there’s no annoyance in her voice. You’ve noticed she’s always patient with you, letting you ramble on even if half the time you’re just going on about random things, like the color of the sky today or what you had for lunch.

You settle into a comfortable silence for a moment, and you find yourself tracing little patterns on the fabric of her sleeve, focusing on the soft texture beneath your fingers. She doesn’t say anything, just glances down at you with a fond look, and it makes you feel so at home, so completely understood.

“Hey, what’s on your mind?” she asks, catching your eye. Her voice is soft, like she knows she’s breaking the quiet but wants to hear whatever’s going on inside your head.

“Oh, nothing,” you mumble, ducking your head and smiling. “Just… you’re really pretty.”

Emma smirks, rolling her eyes in a way that’s only half-serious. “Yeah? Tell me something I don’t know.” She pulls you closer, letting you rest your head on her shoulder, her fingers absentmindedly threading through your hair. “But I guess you’re not so bad yourself.”

The episode ends, but neither of you reach for the remote. Instead, she turns to you, shifting so that you’re almost nose-to-nose. You can feel the warmth radiating from her, her hand gently brushing against your cheek as she studies you, a soft smile playing on her lips.

“You know, you’re adorable when you’re all clingy like this,” she teases, her tone light.

Your face heats up, and you bury it in her shoulder, mumbling something incoherent. She laughs, a gentle sound that vibrates through you, making you feel warm from head to toe.

She reaches for the blanket draped over the couch, pulling it around both of you and leaning back, pulling you into her side. You feel her lips press against your forehead, a soft kiss that lingers just a second longer than usual.

“What’s that for?” you ask, looking up at her with a grin you’re trying to hide.

“Can’t I just kiss you without needing a reason?” Emma smirks, brushing a strand of hair from your face.

“Maybe,” you murmur, trying to look unaffected, but the corners of your mouth betray you, curving up into a smile. “But you like giving me a reason.”

Emma just chuckles, resting her chin on top of your head as you snuggle closer, practically melting into her. For a while, there’s no need for words. You’re content just lying there, listening to her heartbeat, feeling her fingers lightly trace your arm in lazy circles. You’re usually the one who clings to her, but tonight, she’s the one holding onto you like you’re something precious.

When you start talking again, it’s about everything and nothing, the conversation drifting effortlessly. You tell her little stories about things you barely remember, like the time you once thought you could fly as a kid, and how you used to think the moon was made of cheese. She listens with a small, adoring smile, asking questions even when the stories are mundane. It feels like you could tell her anything, and she’d just smile and keep listening, holding you even closer.

You don’t even realize you’re nodding off until you feel her whisper, “Get some sleep, Y/N.” And with a final kiss on your forehead, you drift off, wrapped up in the warmth of her arms.

[fangel]

always, attic angel — jake [ 심재윤 ]

synopsis : jake’s hidden secret isn’t so secret anymore, but he’ll go to great lengths to keep it. he reaches his breaking point when faced with betrayal. he relinquishes any remaining sense of sanctity, surrendering to everything he's spent his life trying to suppress. ⇀ read part 1 here ⸝⸝ updated playlist

pairing : jake sim x fem. reader featuring : heeseung genre : psychological thriller, smut, yandere word count : 7.7k content advisory : dark content ⚠︎ sexually explicit content, obsessive!jake, possessive!jake, jake in general, corrupt!reader, choking, dubcon, somnophilia, spanking, unprotected sex, stockholm syndrome, religious themes and concepts, violence, blood, mentions of homicide/death, open ending - mostly proofread

“can you keep a secret?”

jake wasn’t only asking heeseung the literal question, but he was questioning himself. how long could he realistically hide you away? were you, his sacred secret, something that he could actually keep? he’s thought about it a lot. often losing hours in a day just going over the agonizing idea of not.

heeseung at a loss for words, just watches jake’s body language. jake is like nothing he’s ever seen before. jay and sunghoon have brought up jake’s odd behavior with concern, but he always brushed it off. now heeseung is here to witness it himself, stunned with his brows furrowed and a mouth opening and closing, looking for words he can’t find. he looks back up to the top of staircase, the room that he knows is occupied with someone. hundreds of questions flood his mind but he doesn’t know where to begin. 

“jake,” he says quietly, eyes darting from the door up the stairs and to the boys huddled in the living room. “what did you do? who is here?” even if jake did have a girlfriend, or just someone he’s been seeing, why would he need to act this way? with the way the air feels around them, heeseung is sure that there’s much more going on. and whatever it could be, was far from good. 

jake still can’t look at heeseung. he just stares to the floor with a death grip on heeseung. his breathing picks up in slow, deep heaves. he holds onto his hyung like a lifeline. heeseung feels genuine dread. the chill he feels run through his body makes every hair stand up. he wants to pull away from jake, to go investigate before the others get nosy or cause a scene. but he can’t. his instincts are telling him that if he moves too quickly that jake will break.  

“jake… if i go up there—” he begins to say slowly, quietly. and that’s when jake looks up at heeseung. his eyes look wild, almost like they’re threatening him. heeseung swallows hard, sensing that maybe he is silently threatening him. 

heeseung tries to step back but jake only digs his nails into the flesh of heeseung’s arm. he hisses at the sting and attempts to tug his arm away from the hold. jake’s strength is something heeseung never knew he had; he thinks that jake might just fucking break his arm at the elbow right here and now. 

through clenched teeth, jake seethes under his breath, “i’ll explain, but get them all out of my house first. and i swear to god if you tell another soul you’ll be buried out back too.” 

what the fuck, is all heeseung can think. his eyes wide from the venomous threat. he complies with jake out of fear. these were treacherous waters and he wasn’t going to test it out by diving in. especially with the tension growing too thick and too fast for heeseung to waste any time. 

jake follows heeseung to the living, standing behind him, watching and listening. he doesn’t say a word as his older friend handles the situation. he just shifts on his feet while staring into the back of heeseung’s head.

heeseung stumbles over his words, nervously attempting a lie to get the rest of the boys to leave. the words catching in his throat that he masks with a cough whenever one of them makes a questioning expression. 

although disoriented and perturbed, they all listen to heeseung. heeseung being obviously troubled with something serious made them gather their things with haste. they were rushing out to the car in minutes with no questions asked. there were many to be had, but they assumed they would find out eventually. 

jake and heeseung watch as they drive away, from the front door. neither of them say a word even when the vehicle is out of sight. the taillights fading into the snowscape treeline of gravel road is all to be heard and seen. 

there’s a pregnant pause before jake closes the door and locks it, all 5 different locks. heeseung raises a brow, stepping back slowly. his eyes watching as jake stuffs the ring of keys into his front hoodie pocket. he makes note of it. 

jake, still yet to utter a word, just walks into the living room area to clean up the leftover mess. heeseung, unsure of what to do, just helps in stillness. the tv remains a static screen displaying no signal: (1) check the cable connections and settings of your source device. the kitchen oven light flickers every so often. and the darkness of the night bleeds into the house. it’s eerily quiet between them. 

after some time, there’s a slow creak of a door to be heard. both of the boys heads shoot upward and down the hallway. layla trots away from them and sits at the end of staircase. her head tilted, ears raised, and mouth open in what would be interpreted as a smile. 

slow footsteps make their way down. the space between each creaking step of the wooden floorboards shows how apprehensive and timorous you are. once halfway down, there’s a pause. you’re standing there, waiting for a noise or response from jake. you saw the group of his friends leave, but there was still another car parked outside. and after waiting for so long, listening to silence, you had to see why jake hadn’t come up to see you, to tell you it’s safe to come out. 

jake stands from his crouched position, dropping the wet wipe he was just using to clean the low coffee table. he throws off his jacket to the edge of the couch. there’s a clink of the cluttered keys, but only heeseung hears it. jake’s already in tunnel vision. he gives heeseung a daring glare before walking away to meet you halfway. heeseung sits down on the couch, his hands folded over his lap while his leg picks up an anxious bounce. he looks at the pocket of the abandoned material. a glimmer of metals peak through the opening. 

jake walks up the stairs that you stand in the middle of, layla hot on his trail. he gives you a small smile as he places his hands on your shoulders to turn your body back around. “i didn’t tell you when to come out, did i?” he whispers with small anger, trying to keep his tone light but what’s deeper surfaces regardless. 

you very rarely made jake angry. a feeling of disappointment envelops you like instinct. as if you had to feel bad for going against him. 

“i’m sorry i made a noise,” you mumble, “i got excited when i heard them mention me.” it’s an honest admission. you turn your head back to jake and your guilt drops to something empty. the color fades from your face when you see him. he looks disgusted. “i-i’m sorry, i-” your mouth open and mind trying to find the right thing so say. 

he grabs the back of your neck and begins to walk forward, forcing your body back up to the bedroom. you stumble over your feet, nearly falling. his footsteps stomp against the wooden stairs. his hold on you is squeezing with fingers pressing into the sides of your throat. you want to cough away the feeling but decide on struggling to remain quiet instead. someone is still here. i promised to behave. 

when back in the room, he shoves you forward with the release of his grip. the door slams behind him. you lose balance but catch your own feet, your ankle shooting in a great affliction that you’ve become accustomed to ignore. your hands reach for your throat to massage the ache. you whimper at the touch. 

“it was a perilous decision, making you my attic angel.” his heavy footsteps march forward. he picks you up from under your arms and tosses you onto the bed. you bounce slightly before gathering yourself. you push yourself back into the corner of the bed, hugging your knees to tuck into your body, like you’re protecting yourself. you watch as he places his knee onto the bed, his hands too, leaning towards you. “i am trying so hard, so why isn’t it enough?” his head shakes in disbelief. “i’m just not enough for you? you want everyone to see you, to know you. why? as if they would need or love you as much as i do.” the last sentence is a scoff, spat with hate. he just stares at you with a tilt to his head. you feel that he’s mocking you in some way with his ridiculous words. 

tears brim your eyes, your hands forming small fists that tremble in a rage you’ve always felt within you. “i never asked you to.” your words are firm, a tight lip frown wears your face. you want to argue that this isn’t love and he’s just a sick man, but you don’t want to spill more tears over him. you’ve been drained enough.

jake’s face flashes with an array of emotions. his fingers curl into the blankets so tight his knuckles turn white. he looks irated and dejected, but mostly broken.

“you didn’t have to.” his face is a scowl, glaring at you for the first time. how could his attitude change so quickly? “you wanted me, and now you have me. let it be enough.” he pushes himself off the bed and picks up the metal cuff chain from the floor with one hand. you instantly try to scramble up off the bed but he’s faster; he takes your bruised, weakened ankle in his free hand to drag you into him. you yelp with agony, trying to kick your leg around in a struggle that would hopefully prevent the entrapment. but he secures it onto you with a low growl, warning you that your actions have been enough. 

with a burning gaze, he pushes you back down onto the bed before making strides to the door. he’s never been so blatantly mean towards you. it hurts far more than you could’ve ever expected. you slide yourself off the bed with urgency, tripping up behind him. you want to cry so badly, but you also want to show you’re stronger than he allows you to be. your hands reach for him to grab at the back of his shirt, a try of pulling him back from the door. “take it off! take it off now!” you stomp your metal clad foot, the chain rattles against the floor. 

layla begins to bark loudly from the other side of the door. her paws scratch at the closed white wood. 

jake spins around with your raised voice and slaps his hand over your mouth, “shut the fuck up!” he whispers with heated aggression. his other hand grabbing the back of your head, fingers tangled in your hair and craning your neck back to look at him. crazed eyes stare into yours like they want to rip you apart. you can no longer help it now, tears escape and wash down to meet his hand. your entire body is now shaking in fear. “angel, i thought i taught you better than this… haven’t you made yourself known enough tonight?” he softens in tone, but his expression and hands don’t match. they’re strong, keeping you still. 

you shake your head frantically under his hold. his large hand taking up half your face, making it hard to breathe. your mouth and nose only taking in larger breaths of air that just isn’t sufficient. fat tears run down your face as you continue to shout muffled pleas into his palm. 

“take it off!” 

“let me go!” 

“stop, stop!” 

“help me!” it’s a deadened attempt of a shrill scream.

it’s all lost against his skin. you try to slap his hand and arms off of you but it’s to no avail. you’re simply too feeble to put up the fight you want to. you’ll always be overpowered by man. 

his hold doesn’t let up. he just watches you struggle in blazing silence. your lungs losing oxygen make you see bright white stars scatter your vision. the burning tears only make it all the more hazy. your body feels weak, like it’s about to collapse in on itself. is this what it’s like to lose consciousness? weird, it feels kind of good. you use all your strength to keep your eyes open, but they blink slowly to a close. 

“please.” is the final beg to be said against his palm.

“i love you.” is the final words he promises before it all goes black. 

　 　　　⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝　　 　　⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝　　 　　⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝

 　when jake finally comes downstairs, he looks like he’s seen a ghost. 

heeseung—who was in the kitchen—heard jake’s descent with the settling creaks of the house’s floors, returns to the couch. he nervously watches jake, who was yet to look over at him, as he stuffs something back into the hoodie that jake left behind before going up to that room. 

jake just stands at the bottom of the staircase with a dead stare, eyes unblinking and unfocused. he looks pale, stuck in a state that heeseung is not ready to approach or question. heeseung heard nearly everything from upstairs. it was jarring, and enough evidence to understand that the house is dangerous for everyone in it. 

to think that he’s been here before without a clue of what was happening behind closed doors makes his skin crawl. he never could have imagined that his own friend, or himself, would get wrapped up in a scenario like this. was it all merely a matter of time? 

heeseung slowly stands up. due to the silence, even the slight sound of movement has jake’s heard turn in a split second to his friend's direction. 

unknowing of what to do, heeseung just stays still like a deer in headlights. frightful in nature as if he was the one to be caught in the wrong place. he’s frozen under the cold, black eyes that bore into him. 

jake stalks over to heeseung slowly. the unbreaking eye contact and lack of words sends chills through the older male. the kitchen oven light hums in the background, and it’s all to be heard. jake places himself on the other couch in the living room. the light flickers off and on again when heeseung follows jake’s actions, sitting once more. 

“i’ve never hurt her before,” his tone hostile, as if to defend himself from whatever he was imagining that heeseung was thinking, “not physically at least, i don’t think.” 

heeseung feels a cold sweat take over. his palms sweaty, squeezing his own thighs for a sense of stability. this can’t be real. he couldn’t process any of this. how could this be what jake is? he sucks his bottom lip between his teeth and gnaws with anxiety. eyes trained on the intense presence before him. 

jake speaks up again, his voice breaking like he’s about to cry, “she looked at me so.. she looked terrified of me, seung. and i made her cry again.” jake has his elbows resting on his knees, his head hung low with hands fisted in his hair. he pulls on his dark locks in distress. 

heeseung glances from jake to the front door. then back to jake. and then the staircase. and then the front door again before going back to jake. he feels like his lungs are going to burst, his breathing something he now has to force himself to manually maintain. 

“but fuck, man!” jake hits himself in the head once, twice, three times. his smack echoing through the room, sending shivers of panic through heeseung each time. “i-i can’t think! what the hell am i supposed to do!?” there’s a pause. “i want to be good for her. she’s supposed to help me but i’m getting worse everyday.” his hands drag down over his face, covering it. 

“jake, i don’t know—”, heeseung’s voice didn’t reach. 

“i went to church. i prayed. i couldn’t confess though. i was too cowardly to say what ill thoughts consumed me.” jake looks up to heeseung with tears in his eyes, “too cowardly to admit to what i’ve done. i want to be clean, man. but i am full of greed, lust, and wrath. i can wash my hands over and over, but i still remember the feeling. a damned confession wouldn’t take the weight of that away.” he laughs lowly, shaking his head. a hand lazily wiping his tears from his face. “and i see it every night. the stains that painted me, that should’ve made me feel dirty. it didn’t.” 

heeseung needs to get the fuck of here now. he can’t keep up with jake’s insane behavior or confession. this has gone far beyond his expectations; his flight or fight instincts are screaming that this is unsafe territory. 

“but when i have her, it’s not so bad. i can’t--i can’t have you getting in the way, or anything, anyone else, for that matter.” jake is hanging on by a thread, it’s clear. he was going to snap soon. “do you understand that?”

heeseung nods his head but can’t bring himself to say a word. 

“well say it, damn it! say ‘jake, i won’t get in the way.’” his voice loud, demanding. 

“jake,” he stands on shaking legs, “i won’t get in your way. i w-won’t say a thing. this has nothing to do with me, man.” his hands up in a defending position as he makes brave steps that lead to the front of the house. “you can trust me…” 

“i hope so, or you’ll end up like her parents… somewhere in the back of those woods to feed the maggots.” 

heeseung nods again then darts for the door and out to his car. he wastes no time in getting far away from that nightmare. as he starts the car, he looks up to the window at the highest point of the house. the light is off and there is no face peaking through with hope. heeseung exhales deeply. he recalls the smile jake wore with his leaving statement. closing his eyes, he knows that he is no hero, and certainly won’t be made a victim. 

but, he also isn’t someone to do nothing. so, he’ll leave for now. 

　 　　　⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝　　 　　⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝　　 　　⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝

 　jake’s mind is in a whirlwind. he needs to release the weight of everything that’s suffocating him from the inside. he feels as if all his organs have corroded and are crawling up his esophagus, like hundreds of little centipede feet, only to get stuck in his throat. 

he doesn’t even recognize how he got back to the bedroom since heeseung’s escape; unable to realize that some has passed. 

he stands in the middle of room, blinking his eyes back to a state of awareness. he was watching you sleep in the bed he placed you in. or perhaps he was just looking through you. he made you pass out in and from his own hands. he despised himself for it, and how it gave him a sense of god-like power. 

jake moves towards the bed and creeps in next to you. his hands find a place on your hips to pull you on top of him. the subtle movement of your chest and small breaths assure him of your liveness. he hugs you close like that for a minute.

his fingers trail up and down your body, squeezing and caressing his favorite parts of you. they stop at your ass, full in his hands he begins to move your body back and forth. his growing cock pressing up into your pussy, grinding with the maneuver. the back of his throat releases a soft, guttural sound. 

his large hands slip up your night dress and pull your underwear to the side. he runs a finger along your folds, feeling every detail of your womanhood. the callosed tips rub over your core until a layer of wetness leaks through.   

you shift on top of him, not awake, but subconsciously sensing an uncomfortable intrusion. a small noise leaves your lips, something of a whine. 

“i know you’re not all there. you’re too compliant with all i’ve done. you listen too well.” he’s whispering against the side of your face. his free hand working to take off his pants and boxer briefs. “you’re like me.” he licks a strip up your face, wet saliva leaving a trail. you stir again, face scrunching before rubbing onto jake’s shirt. 

he grins at you, thinking you’re cute all out of it and on top of him. his eyes find the teeth marks on your shoulder. the thin spaghetti strap of your dress falling from it, revealing full sight to the scarring mark of his possession. “i can sink my teeth into you and you will do nothing but watch me lick it clean. and you would still let me hold you. kiss you. and,” he’s rubbing his leaking cock against your pussy, humping up into you so the head dips in and out. “fuckkk.” he moans, feeling himself being teased with the enveloping of your creamy, warm hole. 

you make another tired, bothered sound with eyes squeezed shut. 

“possibly i have let you think of me as tender, but i will prove to you i am everything but.” he thrusts his hips upwards, his cock pushing into your tight core. he moans at the feeling of you wrapped around him, hugging him with wet heat. “i’ve always had these tainted thoughts with me. i could never admit to anyone, or myself, what i longed for.” his arms are wrapped around you, holding you close. his legs propped up, knees bent and feet pressed down to the bed, as he begins a brutal pace to pound himself in and out of you. 

your eyes open along with your mouth, a sound in between a moan and gasp leaves your lips. you look up to the man who is fucking you, confused and disoriented. you feel a deep pain between your legs and in the bottom of your stomach. you try to pull yourself back, to sit up, but jake grounds you to his chest. 

“i prayed for all the disturbed thinking to come to an end. my mind became more grotesque, morbid.” he looks at you and all you see is misery. his eyes are so empty yet he forces a smile. “i am haunted like a sick man.” i know, you think. your head rests tucked by his chin and neck. you just watch him, letting your body make little moans and chases to his touch like it’s trained to. “i always wanted more. i didn’t want to just think it, i wanted to do it all.” 

“mhmm.” your eyes blink slowly, watching the faces of pleasure he makes through your eyelashes. maybe this is all a dream, you imagine wishfully. 

“i stopped praying a long time ago, yet kept stepping into god’s house. i knew something, someone, would come for me.” he grunts, squeezing the skin on your back to bruises. his trusts become messy as squelching sounds of your pussy. skin slaps and fragmented noises come from the both of you. “in the bible; tell me, angel, who did god send to fulfill all his obligations?” he nibbles on your ear. sometimes licking and leaving his spit coating it. 

him pistoning his cock at his assaulting speed and force, elicits a loud mewl from you. you wish he would fuck you even harder. violent enough that it rattles your brain and body senseless. you don’t want to think at all, just want to see those stars again. 

jake is pissed when you ignore his question. one of his hands slides up your back while the other moves down to slap your ass. you whine at the sting. he grabs the back of your neck like he did earlier and you can’t help but grin a little. he yanks your head back and your body sits up on top of him. he feels so deep inside of you. you hum at the feeling, not even realizing your hand drops down to rub over your lower stomach. 

you still wear the faint grin on your lips as you look down at him. “hm?” 

“who carried out his judgements, served punishments, and set examples?” he fucks into you slower, focusing on your body. noticing how your hips move in small swivels and bounces on his cock. how your nipples peek through in needy points of the thin material. 

he gives your ass another slap and your head tips back with a moan, “ngh, the angels.” 

he squeezes your neck from behind at your response. your eyes rolls back as you continue to fuck yourself down onto him in severity. a slutty sound leaving you with every kiss of his dick to your cervix. 

“yes,” he pulls you back down to his face. his hand is still tight around your neck, borderline suffocating in pressure. “and he sent one to me too.” he feels your pussy pulse around him, signaling you’re close to cumming. “he sent you to me. but instead of learning a lesson i became obsessed just as my thoughts.” jake always had a dangerous personality, hiding inside of him. his obsessions becoming an illness was nothing he should be shocked by. or maybe it’s the other way around and he was always sick so he became it. “i so badly wanted you to be my savior… to tell me lies of purity and goodness.” he feels his cock throb, aching to release. he chases the feeling of pure want, pounding relentlessly into you. 

“open your mouth,” he demands with a low growl. you listen without a second thought and he spits into it. his saliva meeting your tongue only to be swallowed down. 

he pressed a kiss to your lips while you cry out in a mix of pain and pleasure as you cum. your body collapses on top of his like an act of defeat. your breathing so ragged and lungs suffering; jake releases his hold on your neck only to use both hands on your hips to bounce your body on him. 

while your body makes small quivers in overstimulation, jake groans loudly as he cums inside of you. as you feel the deep warmth coat your insides, a sense of drowsiness takes over you. 

“i feel like a besotted rot has taken over me, and it’s been growing evermore since i met you.” he whispers, relaxing his body flat against the bed. with you still on top of him and his cock still buried in you with his seed, he hugs you. “it’s killing me from the inside out. you’re going to kill me. i can feel it.” 

the quiet and gentle honesty of his fearful ending confession lulls you to sleep. 

he continues to fuck you until he’s too tired to not. 

　 　　　⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝　　 　　⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝　　 　　⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝

 　when you wake up the next morning, you feel your entire body is in pain. there’s a throbbing pain in your head, a dull strain in your neck, and a heavy ache in between your legs. 

you sigh as you sit your body up, hands place slightly behind you at your sides. you make slow circles of your head to stretch your neck muscles. there’s a pang of sharp pain for a split second but you relax once reversing the movements around. 

with lazy eyes, you scan the surroundings of the bedroom. the sun shines bright through the thin lace, white curtains. the clock reads that it is half past 10 in the morning. on the white, wooden night stand beside the bed is a note, a cup of water, and a plate of cut up fruit that has probably been out longer than intended. the door is slightly cracked open and the cold, heavy weight is missing from around your ankle. 

you stretch your arms and back before leaning over to chug down the glass of water. you think of eating the fruit presented for you, but decide on not. it's hard to have an appetite these days. 

you move yourself to sit at the end of the bed, legs and feet dangling off the mattress. you realize how quiet the house is. normally, jake is always with you when he’s home. if he’s working from home then he is next to you, or at least at the desk with his work laptop. but it’s saturday, so why would he be working? 

“jake!” you call out his name, but there is no response. your voice doesn’t sound like normal, it’s rough. you call for him again and still there is nothing. only layla comes up the stairs to push past the door. she too looks confused. 

you look outside the large window next to the bed and realize that his car isn’t there either. 

you look back to the nightstand, remembering there was a note left for you. you pick it up and read: had to run out. i will be back soon. rest and eat well, angel. 

with the note in your hand, you squeeze your hand into a fist, crushing and crinkling the paper in your palm. you stare at the destroyed paper, enclasped in your hand, before releasing your fist and letting it fall to the floor. 

the sound of a car driving makes you turn around. you don’t know if it’s annoyance or ease that washes over you. but once your eyes see the car, you know that it’s neither. because it’s not jake’s car that you see outside. you can recognize it’s one from the other night though. 

you’re quick to stand up and make your way over to the side of the clear glass. you peek over the side of the window, suddenly not comfortable to be seen. is it because you know jake isn’t here? your heart rate picks up rather quick, along with a feeling of anxiety. who is here? why? 

a tall man with dark, brownish.. no reddish hair, steps out of the now parked vehicle. he glances around before jogging over to the side of the house. you furrow your brows in confusion, wondering what he could be doing. you bite at your lip, trying to look around the house as much as the window allows.

then you walk over to the bedroom door and close it quietly, leaving you and layla inside. you lean your back to the door and slide down to the floor. your ear presses against the wood, listening to anything that you can. there isn’t much to be heard for a minute or so. and then there is. there’s a landing thud from somewhere downstairs. a clashing of objects hit the floor with it. something like a glass bowl or cup, if you had to assume. you can tell it’s coming from the kitchen based on the direction alone. 

your heart beats harder now and you don’t even realize how your hands hold a small tremble. you’re frozen in place; you don’t know what to do. jake always tells you what to do. he tells how to handle situations, how to react, how to respond. 

the footsteps of the intruder are rushed. quick feet move through the house and up to the stairs, only to stop right outside the door that you’re in front of. you feel a dangerous panic coarse through you, and unknown to you, you’re holding your breath as if it could give you away. 

seconds feel like minutes followed by a knock at the door. it’s slow and just as scared as you are. 

you place your hands over your mouth, silencing yourself from uttering a sound or a word. meanwhile layla lets out a guarded growl. you shake your head as you look at her, as if she could understand the notion. 

“i know you’re in there. i’m here… i’m here to help you.” the voice is sweet, familiar. it’s a friend of jake that’s been here before. he must have been the one who stayed longer than he should’ve last night. 

for some reason, you still remain silent. why would he come back? 

“i don’t know what exactly is going on between you two, but i know when something isn’t right. and jake isn’t…” his voice goes soft. he’s worried and nervous. 

“he isn’t what?” heeseung hears your melodic voice, weak yet defensive. 

“can you open the door? i don’t know how much time we have.” the door knob turns but doesn’t push open. it’s not locked. you both know it, but neither of you bring yourself to break the barrier. 

you stand from the door, your legs uneasy as if a baby fawn learning to walk. you grab the door handle with a timid hand. you turn it slowly and pull back the door just a crack. you look up with wide eyes. you’re face to face with someone other than jake for the first time in what feels like forever. someone is finally seeing you, talking to you, acknowledging your existence. why isn’t it as exciting as you anticipated? 

heeseung gapes at your disheveled appearance. his eyes quick to find the many bruises that litter your body, from your neck to your arms and legs. then to the scarred bite mark that’s discolored and horrid along your shoulder. and lastly over your face: dry, bitten lips and dark circles around your sad eyes. “i’m sorry.” is all heeseung can say. you think his voice sounds disappointed. 

“why? it’s not like you did anything.” you pull the door open a little more, unintentionally though. it furthered the exposure of the room when your hand pulled back to wrap around yourself. your eyes scan over his face, taking in the up close new appearance. you think he’s very cute for a second before a dread of guilt becomes you. you wrap your arms tighter around your midriff, as if to conceal what you’ve begged to be seen. you avert your eyes from his, suddenly embarrassed. 

heeseung steps into the room, and you step back. your eyes watch his feet. it feels like you weren’t given the permission to look at him; like you’ve already overstepped jake’s boundaries and broken his rules by seeing and speaking what you already have. yet your heart races with adrenaline. 

“that’s the problem. i didn’t do anything the minute i knew something was wrong.” 

it’s nice to hear something rational for once.  

“i tried to come up with some sort of plan as soon as i could. he left and i found his keys,” you immediately look up at heeseung when he mentions the object you fantasize about. keys. unlocked cage. freedom. “i figured the kitchen window would be the less susceptible.” he attempts a laugh but it’s clearly full of nerves. his eyes dart from you to the outside window. it reminds you of yourself. that feeling of waiting for jake, always mixed with too many emotions to really decipher. 

“but for real, you need to get a jacket and shoes on. we have to leave right now.” heeseung deadpans. his eyes watching yours that refuse to look back. you just stand still in the room, shaking like a leaf in the wind. your focus trained to the floor, spacing out from the scenario. 

“is this real?” your voice is quiet, unsure. “did jake put you up to this to test me? i don’t want to cause more trouble with him. i don’t like when he’s…”

heeseung begins to frantically search the room. he goes to the closet and shifts through the hanging clothes for the thickest jacket he can find. he grabs a big one with faux fur lining and heavy material, “put this on. where are your socks?” he hands it to you but you just hold it low in your hands, letting it hit the floor. he opens drawers of the dresser nearby, finding a pair of socks. 

still spacing out, feeling dreamlike, you sit down at the edge of the bed. the large winter coat still hands in your fingers, half over your lap and exposed legs. 

heeseung crouches down in front of you with socks in hand and a pair of boots by his side. he looks up at you with despairing eyes, but you just watch the floor below him. i should sweep the floors. there’s dog hair and dust everywhere. 

trepidatious, large and unknown hands pick up your foot. the cold fingers brush over your abused ankle. a sick feeling of flutters fills your stomach, you jerk your leg back from his touch. this isn’t right. something like a stray cat who doesn’t let strangers touch. 

“what happened to this?” he lightly taps the bone, “you need to see a doctor.” he tries again but faster this time. gentle hands pulling the sock over your foot and then the other. next he reaches for the boots to put your feet into. “come on, get the jacket on.” he says as he stands, a hand reaching out to you. you stand from the bed and ignore the offered gesture. 

you take a few steps forward and stop. heeseung takes notice of the slight limp in your walk. his eyes follow the floor from your feet and that's when he sees it. the long silver chain that’s attached to the bedpost, mounted to the floorboards. 

“jesus fucking christ…” he exhales, taking the coat from your hands to put it on you himself. 

“i used to try and break that whenever i had the chance, but i ended up hurting myself in the process.” you laugh a little. he sees your blank stare and lost smile. “he would ice my ankle for me though. and he wrapped it up, changing the bandages everyday when it was worse.” 

“i’m gonna get you somewhere safe.” heeseung promises, taking your hand in his own to lead you to the door. “you won’t have to live like this anymore, okay? do you have more family somewhere, someone we could call?” heeseung is doing his best to remain calm, but inside he senses immense uneasiness. you can feel how his palms are sweaty and holding too tight of you. you don’t like it. 

“my parents…” it’s a whisper. he helps you down the stairs and to the kitchen. your heart feels like it's a ticking time bomb set to explode. each beat a warning that screams louder and louder.

“well, how about anyone else.” there’s consternation. 

you stop in your tracks, heeseung tries to pull you forward. his eyes begging to leave through the window he left open for you two. “why anyone else?” you question. you feel heavy again, a boil builds in your body, your heart racing faster than you know it was capable. your breathing becomes quick and panicked. heaves and wheezes now leaving your body. “what? w-what do you m-mean?!” 

“they… jake, he…” heeseung stammers, his head moving side to side in a slow display of sorrow. he reaches out to you, to pull you into a hug of comfort. 

but you just stand there, unbelieving of what the man is trying to imply to you. “no, no… he wouldn’t—” your bottom lip quivers and eyes sting. 

from the corner of your eyes, you see a dark shadow approaching heeseung from behind. a large object hangs high in the air with the shadow. you let out a blood curdling scream, eyes looking past heeseung. the tall man turns his head around before the held object comes crashing down into the back of his head. heeseung drops to the floor in an instant, his hand slipping out of yours. 

it all happened so fast. 

you’re in a fit of panicked sobs now. your eyes can’t look away from the man who tried to help you; the man you didn’t try to believe in. there’s an open gash in his head, bleeding and matting into the hair. you feel sick. 

your attention is removed from the man when a familiar hard grip pulls on your hair. “where the hell did you think you were going!?” jake’s voice is terribly sad, loud and croaking. he’s dragging you back down the hall and up the stairs to your room. 

“i wasn’t going anywhere!” you squirm around trying to look back at him, “i was never going to leave! i swear!” 

jake sits you down at the chair by the desk, his hands place on your shoulders. he looks down at you with disquiet heartache, “you promise?” he’s fixing to cry. you hate when jake cries. 

you nod your head quickly, still having a panic attack, still frightful and overwhelmed. 

jake swallows hard, staring into your eyes. he’s trying to trust your word, and ultimately he just does. he places a long kiss to your forehead. you feel a drop of wetness land against your skin. and you just sit there, watching him leave the room with hands of shaking fists. 

you hear a lot happening downstairs while you’re glued to the chair. there’s loud commotion and aggressive words being passed between the two. heeseung is still alive. they’re fighting. 

unknowing of what to do, you squeeze your eyes shut. you curl your body inwards and cover your ears, gently rocking yourself back and forth to ease your mind of the chaos. this isn’t real. it’s all a bad dream. it’s another bad story you conjured up. 

and then someone yells. a painful, agonizing noise that you can’t disassociate from. it sends shivers through you. you can’t open your eyes, you can’t leave the room. if you don’t see it then it’s not happening, right? 

the clashing of aggression comes to a halt. and the usual eerily silence of the house stands still. 

a few minutes go by. 

you lift your head and open your eyes when you sense the door being weakly pushed open. 

you gasp and stand up, quickly moving over to jake to help him stand up straight instead of leaning on the door. 

“j-jake…” you’re crying, “hey, wha-what happened?” you’re trying to support his weight but it’s too much. you both somehow manage to make it to the bed. did he do it? did he kill heeseung? 

jake is covered in blood and he’s crying too. he simply shakes his head and presses wet kisses your cheek, pulling you down to lay next to him. he can’t say anything. 

confused and scared, you ask him again, but he doesn’t speak yet. he just holds onto you as tight as his body allows. the blood begins to stain your clothes, the bed sheets and blankets.

he breathes a ragged sigh, looking at you with wet, thick lashes, “i thought god hated me. ya know, for making me the way i am and expecting me to follow him.” he coughs, turning his head away from you, hiding. “but why would he hate me and still give you to me?” he laughs with a small cough, he feels his mouth tinge with metallic iron. 

you watch from the side of his face, crying quietly. then you feel it. the warm, seeping of thick liquid spilling onto you. your eyes track down your body and his, landing on the gash of his shirt. an open wound punctured in his side. a wrecked sound slips past your lips with your cries. 

“even if it was a punishment, you’ll always just be an angel to me.” his head turns back to face you, his mouth painted red with slips of blood passing the corners of his smile. 

you push yourself from his hug, crazed to find some material to wrap around jake and stop the bleeding. but he pulls you back to him, his eyes closing. “h-hey, hey. stop, it’s okay. just hold me close a little longer.” and you do. through all your whimpers, hiccups, and tears. you wrap your entire body into him, legs entangled and arms wrapped never this tight around him before. 

eve was made from adam’s rib. so is it really your fault for wanting to crawl inside the man you’re closest to? 

jake’s breathing is starting to become dangerously slow, along with the pulse of his heartbeat. 

heeseung, who managed to crawl his way up the stairs, waits outside the door. blood is dripping down his face and neck from his head. he coughs, grabbing your attention. 

you sit up just enough to not let go of jake, swollen eyes watching heeseung sit at the edge of the stairs. his body is struggling to stay upward, he wobbles and sways. his eyes not able to stay open. he asks you if you could drive them to the hospital, in hopes that there is still time to save them. 

you don’t take the risk of losing the only family you have left, so you do what he asks.  

 　time passes by in a blur. you end up back at house a day later to take care of layla. jake and heeseung are still in the hospital. you don’t know who will recover or die first.

when you return to the house, you do all the things that jake would normally do. you take layla outside for a walk around the house. you make sure she has food and water. you make yourself a meal that will be left untouched. 

and then you trudge up to your room and you crawl into the blood stained bed. you attach the metal cuff to your ankle, and lay there in silence. you think of praying but end up crying yourself to sleep instead. 

the first man you knew to really sin, not just true nor venially but mortally sin, you can’t help but want to wait for the return of. to be damned with him may be his punishment and your fate, but whatever happens is in gods hands now. maybe it doesn’t really matter anyways because you’ll be his attic angel, always.

© fangel ┊ do not copy, repost, modify or translate my content ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ — feedback and reblogs are appreciated 🗝️ !

꒰ tags & those who asked for part 2 ⸝⸝ if you want removed lmk ꔛ @nshmrarki @enhalxvr @jaengwon @taeminsboogers @beomsdoll @immelissaaa @pshfan0812 @supershy3 @hauntsoul @jenniferecand @randomanothercreature @numnomn @en-heedeungie @hwasangel @thatonedaragirltho @hooneverse @maliakealoha @kon-ss @laybensu @whateveridontcaresheesh @strawberrynull ꒱

[serraphinna]

"Just once, in case I lose you..."

Synopsis; It took the two of you almost dying for Aki to realise what he wants. (spoiler warning, it's you.)

Pairing; Aki Hayakawa x fem!reader

Content warnings; fem!reader, smut, vaginal penetration, fingering, slight hair pulling (?), semi unrealistic sex, unprotected sex

A/N;  writing got lazy towards the end, literally forced myself to finish this. ( ;´ - `;) but in celebration of the movie coming out, here’s this sexy man.

Aki doesn’t think he’s ever had such a shitty mission before. 

He’s not sure what went wrong, maybe he was tired, more slow than usual. Maybe you and him just weren’t a good pair to fight that devil. Nonetheless, it’s over now—clothes torn and bloodied and bodies covered in scrapes, bruises and sweat but alive.

The drive back home is quiet, Aki shifting in the driver’s seat while you're looking out the window, both of you lost in thought. It was close, so close, the adrenaline still coursing through him, though subdued. The thrill of it all is almost gone, leaving a somber feeling. He wonders what he would’ve left behind. Dying before fulfilling his revenge, just the thought makes his mouth taste bitter.

But then his eyes drift to you, fingers tightening around the wheel ever so slightly. Beside the quiet and their thoughts, there’s something else too. A tension, always lingering in the back of his mind, charged but ignored. But after all that, after almost losing you, feeling his heart sink at every close call, it’s boiling all the way to the surface.

Aki reminds himself to focus on driving, eyes reluctantly moving from your form to stare at the road instead. The buildings mostly have their lights on, leaving just the street lights that seem to make his vision hazy. He finally affords you just one more look, convinces himself it’s to quickly check how many injuries you have and you glance at him as well, your eyes meeting for a moment.

That’s all it takes for him to know what he should do, his fingers once again curling around the steering wheel before suddenly making a turn to haphazardly park in a semi secluded parking lot, pushing his seat back.

“Come here.” 

Is all he says before he’s less than gracefully helping you get on top of him, a few muffled curses, a wince from him, a soft “sorry” from you but finally, you’re straddling his lap and finally, he’s got his hands on you.

“I can’t believe I waited so long,” Aki begins, lips against yours before the two of you can really say anything else, tugging needily but not roughly. His hands fumble with your shirt, rucking it up to splay his fingers on the skin on your side. He breaks the kiss as your weight settles on him, hips bucking up against the pressure.

You’re overwhelming his senses—your warmth, your scent, the softness of your body. One of his hands moves down your side, over your hip and hooks behind your knee to tug, adjust your angle like he needs you even closer. Aki’s nose buries against the crook of your neck, earning a breathy giggle. “That tickles..” you mumble and he smirks against you before pressing a gentle kiss on your skin. “Yeah?” He teases softly, rolling his hips up against you, letting you feel every hard inch of his need for you.

“Aki..” you half sigh, his lips trailing kisses down your throat, humming in approval at the way you squirm. “I need you,”  Aki says, pulling you impossibly closer. “every single day. Let me have you, please. Before.. you know. ” he breathes over your neck and you shudder, nodding. 

“Mhm..” you finally hum, your hands on his shoulders before you’re fumbling with his tie, your ass pressed against his crotch just right. Both of your bodies are aching, but the need overpowers whatever pain would make you wince normally. Aki helps you tug his jacket off, tie loose before he’s impatiently unbuttoning your blouse, tossing it aside with little to no grace.

“You feel that?” he huffs against your lips, kissing you like a starving man. “Mm..” you hum against his lips, pressing down on his erection to let him know that *yes*. You feel it. His hands caress your sides, so gently it makes you dizzy. Then he’s unclasping your bra, one hand moving to your lower back while the other cups your breast, cold thumb circling and teasing your nipple to erect. His lips trail down your jaw to give attention to your second nipple, gently suckling, hot tongue swirling and pressing teeth grazing against the sensitive bud until it’s almost painfully erect, a thin string of saliva breaking when he pulls back and you can feel your core throb at the mere sight.

Fuckkk… he feels so hard, cock straining against his pants and poking at yourass. But he’s not done, he still wants to touch you, see more of you. The hand on your lower back trails up your spine, your nape and then his fingers tangle into your hair to tilt your head to the side before his lips are back on your neck, this time sucking, biting, desperate to leave some kind of mark. “Hn..” you shift, your hands on his upper back, your own fingers moving to tug on his hair, earning a groan from Aki’s lips. He soothes the hickey with a kiss, trailing his lips down to leave one on your breasts until he feels satisfied enough, a low hum escaping his throat.

You on the other hand are frustrated, impatient to have him touch you properly. “Aki,” you half whine, tugging on his locks ever so slightly and he simply smirks, pressing a teasing kiss on the corner of your mouth. “I know. He simply says, hands now on your hips and lips against yours before you can open your mouth again. “Mmhnm..” you whimper against his lips, his fingers hooking and pulling your pants down, helping you kick them off before you’re settling back down on him. He lets his fingers splay across your thigh, squeezing before he pries them just slightly more apart.

“Hurry already,” you can’t help but complain and he gives you this half endeared, half exasperated look that seems to scream ‘what do you think i’m doing?’ but he doesn’t say anything. Instead, he lets his index and middle finger hook on your underwear, thumb brushing against your hip before he drags the already damp fabric down, his eyes locking in on your dripping pussy like waving meat in front of a starving animal. You look beautiful. Breathtakingly so—but he’s not the sentimental type, so instead of saying that, he sucks in a breath, fingers gliding over your wet slit.

“Nnh..” your juices coat his fingers, entrance throbbing each time his digits brush against your clit. You’re soaking, so much so he doesn’t need to use spit as a lubricant, instead he gathers up your juices before lathering it over your folds, index and middle finger gliding in between before he spreads them apart, your hole throbbing. Your hips buck against his palm, a satisfied sigh leaving your lips when his middle finger finally slides in. Your spongy walls hug him instantly, sloppy, warm, tightening before relaxing. He gives a few strokes, working you open enough to slide his index finger in as well, fingers curling and scissoring. You moan, grabbing his wrist out of instinct, your face burying itself into his shoulder, fingers curling around the fabric of his shirt at his chest.

Just as your core tightens, he pulls his fingers out, earning a disappointed noise from your lips he can’t help but find cute. Aki’s hands quickly move to fumble with his belt, shoving his pants and boxers down just enough to let his cock spring free, painfully hard and throbbing. A quiet gasp escapes your lips, hands finding their way onto his shoulders and hips instinctively bucking upwards to help him align the angry tip of his cock against your pussy. You let out a barely audible sound, hole throbbing as if trying to suck him in while he pushes upwards just to pull back a few times. He’s grabbing your thighs, spreading them even further, lips tickling the side of your face. “I want it,” you begin, impatiently wriggling. 

Finally, Aki’s hand finds it’s way onto your hip to push—helping you sink down. You let our half strangled gasp, fingers squeezing so hard into his shoulders, your nails digging into the fabric of his shirt. He groans, pausing for a moment when he’s fully bottomed out, your walls hugging his cock so tightly, almost feels like you’re trying to squeeze it right off. “Fuckk, you feel so good..” he rasps and you swallow hard, wiggling your hips up before sinking down again, your arms moving around his neck to rest your chin on his shoulder.

Aki’s grip on your tights tightens, bucking his hips upwards again and again until the only sound in the secluded car are both of your moans, a continuous sound of your flesh slapping against his, the vulgar noises between your legs every time his cock drives into your squelching pussy. You bury your face into the crook of his neck, your cute little “ah ah ah”’s getting higher, louder. His hand finds its way between your legs, pinching and rolling your clit with his thumb and index finger, your eyes rolling back, a cute little “akii..!” muffled against his skin. “I know, i’m close too.” he barely manages to say, the smooth, controlled motions of his fingers against your clit becoming messy, impatient.

Your core tightens and with a last pride shattering moan, you squirt, your body convulsing and twitching. Reaching his own orgasm, Aki swiftly pulls out, spurting ropes of warm sticky vum on your stomach and legs. Finally, you slightly let yourself limp against him to catch your breath, a bruise on your side brushing against him so you wince. You’re both sweaty, hair sticking to your foreheads and now that the desire’s worn off, you suddenly realise just how much you’re aching. “Ow.” you say dryly, earning a chuckle from Aki. “We should probably get home.” he says, easing you off of him, reaching into the compartment box to get some tissues. “And you need a shower.”

[siwolism]

Hi.... Could you tell us more about Hamhung? Could be anything, just the way you talked about the sunset in your post Affected me in the best way possible

i was going to give you a bunch of fun facts, and i still can if you want me to, but instead, here’s a memory:

growing up in hamhung, you had a lot of freedom. once you had legs enough to keep up with the older kids, your parents pretty much let you go. it was one of those places with a “every kid is everyone’s kid” mentality. it was safe enough that the streets felt like an extension of the playground. by the time I was five, I had joined this little crew of kids from my kindergarten and soon-to-be primary school, along with a couple of older ones from their first year of secondary school who led our gang.

we loved the beach. getting there was easy, trains everywhere, and where there weren’t trains, there were long stretches of quiet road, but we always took the train. after school, we’d drop our bags at home, grab whatever we needed for the beach, shout our plans to our parents, and then sprint through the streets toward hamhung station. most of the time, we’d all arrive together, but if one of us got held up and caused the rest of us to miss the first train, we’d whine about it the whole ride down.

once we made it to hungnam, we’d race off the train, down the road, and straight to the beach. that beach in hungnam was everything to us. wide and endless in the way that, to a kid, felt like you could run forever without hitting the edge of the earth. the sand was the yellow white kind you’d see in travel brochures that felt warm under your feet from the day’s sun. the water stretched out in shifting shades of green and blue, shallow for ages before suddenly dropping off, and always hot no matter how low the sun descended. behind us, the shoreline was framed by a scattering of rocky cliffs, overgrown with stubborn grass and huge trees that the older kids would climb up onto and off into the water. the air smelled salty and tangy. but other times soft and earthy, that’s when the rain was coming.

we ran everywhere because we had rules: back before sundown, no exceptions. we wanted to stretch those hours into forever. however these (in our eyes) dictatorial rules would fall. eventually, our constant whining wore our parents down, and they agreed to extend our curfew to 10:30, on the condition that we found some older kids or adults to look after us.

for weeks, we searched the beach for anyone who’d fit the bill. no luck. then one day, one of the older boys decided to take us to some cliffs at the far end of the beach. we climbed over, and there, on the other side, we found them: a group of university students from the naval school, sitting in the sand and eating takeout.

the next day, we launched our plan. we spent the afternoon playing like usual. racing, swimming, pretending we were in the opera. but as the sun started to dip, we got ready. we practiced and waited to see if they came and luckily for us, they did. me and another friend, being the youngest and arguably the most adorable, ran up to them and begged these exhausted students to come watch us perform.

we’d prepared a whole routine. our song was a mashup between a local folk song about a naval hero and a desperate plea to save us from the terrible fait of having to be home by 7:30. i guess we were convincing (or pitiable) enough because they agreed. they built us a fire, kept an eye on us while we played in the water, and when it got dark, they called us back to sit around the flames.

that became our routine. we’d listen to them tell stories about crazy roommates, exchange trips to china, and professors who made their lives hell. by 9:15, they’d walk us to the station, give us a note to prove we’d been supervised, and send us on our way.

it went on like that for over a year. our own little world of saltwater and firelight, all thanks to bone tired students who where generous enough to play parent to hamhung’s rowdiest group three nights a week.

[genderqueerdykes]

hi hello Equinox! I've been looking into the possibility of having hEDS myself and was wondering if y'all could talk about some of your experiences with it? only if you're comfortable of course very not forced lol :D

hey, sure! i hope some of this will be helpful to you!

an ex pointed out that i might have had it back in ~2020. he commented on how velvety smooth my skin is (i do not moisturize all over, it's just like this) along with how stretchy it is, and how flexible some of my joints are. i was not able to confirm it for a while until 2023 when i started going to physical therapy for my lower back. there, both in the intake and when i was doing exercises, my therapists all asked me if i had hEDS, due to how fair i can stretch, and how i naturally over extend my knees without realizing it. it lead me to laugh and say, "Well, I guess I do!"

i've always been more flexible than most people around me, even for someone who's 320 lbs, i am still more flexible than most people i know. when i was in high school, there were some flexibility tests that our entire PE class had to do, and i was the one who could stretch the farthest, even though i was 300 lbs even at that stage in my life. as i got older, i realized it's extremely easy to injure myself on accident and that that's NOT normal. i don't and have never cracked my knuckles on purpose because all it does is shift my knuckles out of place

it's very easy for me to pinch nerves and muscles between my joints, even when i'm being careful. sometimes it happens in my sleep or even while i'm just sitting stock still. i actually have a pinched nerve in my forearm right now from a wrist injury that has never healed properly. speaking of that, with it being super easy to injure myself, sometimes, i don't recover from those injuries for a long time, or at all. i got a microfracture in my left forearm from punching an object out of rage while being emotionally abused by someone in January of 2024 and it is nearly January of 2025 and it is not healed at all. i'm in PT for it right now and it's getting somewhat better, but not by much

wound healing is a mixed bag for me, sometimes i'm alright with it but generally it takes a long time and i'm very prone to scarring. even relatively light cuts can cause a scar. my teeth are also very weak because of this. the connective tissue that should keep them rooted in place in my gums is weak, and i've lost 2 teeth so far because of it. i still do my best to brush my teeth, but i just have naturally weak connective tissue that isn't able to protect my teeth from infections as well as others. i've had VERY bad dental pain and have gotten lots of infections in my teeth over the years, to the point of needing antibiotics several times

if i think of anything else, i'll let you know! if you have any more questions, i'm happy to answer whatever i can! good luck in your journey, fortunately it's generally pretty easy for medical professionals to tell if you have hEDS or not- they'll generally ask you to do some very light stretches (sometimes even just seeing how far your fingers bend/extend) and can tell pretty easily just by looking at how your joints bend and behave. take care of yourself for now!

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

oh my poor buck buckley. why are you doing this to yourself. I say while enjoying the suffering immensely 🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓🐓

153 or 1k for 🐓 - whatever I hit first!

---

He takes Christopher out for breakfast on Christmas Eve. Just them. He’s going to get to see him tomorrow, at his parents’, for family celebrations. Of course. He thinks he’ll skip on mass. They’re already disappointed in him anyway. 

They go to a diner. Christopher’s eyes are downturned, focused hard on the plastic menus. His energy is a bit different today than usual. Not better.  But his quiet moodiness seems less driven by spite than nerves. Unusual. What does he have to be nervous about? What small shift in standings has Eddie failed to notice?

“Everything okay today, Chris?” Eddie chances asking, after the server pours his coffee and walks away. 

Chris looks at him carefully, like sizing him up. Eddie really doesn’t know what’s going on. 

“I got a gift in the mail last night,” Chris says. 

The longest sentence he’s used all morning.

“Oh yeah?” Eddie asks. “From who?”

“Buck.”

Eddie goes a bit stiff. Chris doesn’t miss the change in body language. 

“Oh yeah? What did he get you?” Eddie asks. He doesn’t want to talk about Buck, really. But he does want to talk. So he’ll take it. 

“A new controller that connects to my computer,” Chris says. “A better one.”

“Hey, that was really nice of him,” Eddie says. “Did you call and thank him?”

Chris shrugs. “Tried. It went to voicemail.”

“Oh,” Eddie says, stomach twisting.

“Why didn’t you invite him for Christmas?” Chris asks. “We always see him for Christmas.”

Eddie feels like he’s been dumbed in an alternate universe. In what world could Chris expect to be here and have Christmas be the exact same? But then again, should he have invited Buck for Christmas? Buck, who is in Hershey, of all places. No way he wanted to spend the holidays there. He probably just went where Maddie was going because… Because he didn’t receive an invite from Eddie, maybe… Because Eddie isn’t around. 

“Uh, Buck actually went to Pennsylvania for Christmas this year,” Eddie says. It’s not a lie, but it’s avoiding the truth. “To visit his parents.”

Chris wrinkles his nose. “That’s stupid.”

Well… 

Yeah, okay. It sort of is. 

“Yeah, I wish he’d… Yeah. It’d be better if he was here. I should have offered.”

Would Buck have come? 

He can see Buck, tight-faced and red-eyed. Don’t worry about me. I’m used to it by now, Eddie. His heart clenches. 

“Is he okay?” Chris asks. 

Eddie blinks. “Um, I… I don’t really know. I think he’s… I mean, I’m sure he is. Yes.”

“That doesn’t sound like you know,” Chris says. 

It feels like tiny needles prying under his skin. This line of discussion. Like Chris is, unintentionally or otherwise, trying to pick at a raw wound. 

“I guess I don’t know as well as I should,” Eddie admits. “We aren’t talking as much as I thought we… He’s just busy lately.”

Christopher’s expression sours even further. 

“Why?” He presses. 

“Why to which part?” Eddie asks.

“Why doesn’t he want to talk to you or me?” Chris asks. “He didn’t answer my call.”

“He’ll call you back, Chris,” Eddie promises. “He wants to talk to you. He’s with his family.”

 “We’re his… Ugh. Why doesn’t he want to talk to you?” Chris asks. 

“He’s not not talking to me, Chris. I think he’s just taking some space. He was sad when I left.”

“He’s sad you’re here so he’s talking to you less?” Chris frowns.

Eddie sort of nods and shrugs in combination. 

“That doesn’t make sense!” Chris complains. “You need to fix that.”

Is he serious? Is he fucking kidding? Eddie’s patience is very near worn thin. 

“I don’t know what to tell you, Christopher, sometimes our decisions hurt other people, even when we don’t mean for them to,” Eddie grits.

Chris inhales sharply. “You’d know.”

“Yeah,” Eddie says. “I do.”

Christopher looks like he’s about to cry, and Eddie still doesn’t understand what this is about. Was it just to make Eddie feel like shit? Another reminder. All he ever does is lose and hurt people. He’s trying to be better and he can’t manage it. Why else keep pressing about Buck? The one person who has ever really been singularly Eddie’s. At least in his own version of events. In truth, that’s probably not what he was at all. Even if it really, really felt like it.

“I’m not hungry anymore,” Chris says after a moment, voice returning to its regular, discontent mumble. 

“Yeah,” Eddie sighs. “Me neither.”

➡️

Eddie sends Buck a voice note later that afternoon. Obviously he’s thinking about him. Him and Chris. There’s nothing else to think about. He’s very tempted to grab a beer and cry about it all. But that seems like a dubious use of alcohol. Something Bobby would frown at, like an angel on his otherwise hellish shoulder. 

So he doesn’t. 

He sits down to watch a movie, trying to find something that doesn’t remind him of anything or anyone. He settles on a stupid cheesy Christmas romance he isn’t invested in at all. Where the actors are mediocre at best and look like they were spit out by AI. Something Chim would hate. But he doesn’t want to think about Chim either right now. So he doesn’t. He just watches and pretends there’s a reason for watching. 

It’s during the commercial break that he sends the voice note. 

He’s not sure why he chooses it over a call or text. Maybe because he knows Buck won’t pick up a call, but he still wants him to hear his voice. He still hopes he’ll send his own voice back. Maybe with a little less pressure. 

“Hey, Buck,” he says. “Uh… I had breakfast with Chris today. He mentioned your gift. Thank you for doing that. Uh, he also said he tried to call and… Well, you’re probably just busy. Hope you’re having a good time. Maybe call him though, when you can? It sounded like he misses you a lot. Thanks.”

[desired-misery]

Chris launches himself backwards— not fast enough to escape the white hot bolt of—

fear. Not—

Nothing in the chamber. Nothing tearing through his throat—

Chris trips over a body because Leon isn't one. Leon's eyes are opening, rust-red lips and teeth bared in a silent snarl. Everyone else steps forward, weapons raised—

“Leon!” Piers’ incredulous shout breaks everyone's instinctive reactions.

Stops Chris' primitive impulse to cover his neck, his brain still filling in what should have happened if Leon had a spare bullet left—

Stops Bravo from shooting, anticipating a hostile, context telling them a dead man moving is a bioweapon threat to eliminate—

And maybe Leon stops not because he recognizes any of them, but because he cannot possibly have the strength. He certainly doesn't have the ammunition. God, how the fuck is he alive—

Chris scrambles back, gets a hand over Leon’s shaking one, on the pistol— holy fuck, it's jammed, not empty— to disarm him. To keep Leon from moving because his gasp of air is so shallow, so ragged— how the fuck isn't he dead— if he isn't dead yet, surely he is on the way, he has a knife shoved into his chest where his heart should be—

“Hey,” Leon protests, his voice horribly hoarse, failing to keep Chris from taking his pistol away. “I need that.”

“Fucking hell, Leon!” Chris is relieved, absolutely, but he can't stop himself from feeling a wave of anger, too.

Leon’s eyes are dull, only half open. He always looks exhausted, but his eyes look sunken in, the skin around his eyes as dark as a bruise. Literally, deathly pale—

Chris pulls off his helmet so Leon can see his face, so Leon can stop his scarily weak attempt to get Chris' hands off of him, to sit up because Chris is terrified if Leon moves, he is going to finish bleeding out—

“Leon, Leon, stop! You're hurt, stop, please.”

It takes way too many seconds for Leon to focus on him, to hear him. For his gaze to refocus, settle on Chris’ face, for recognition to hit. Leon stops moving, letting his right hand drop back into his lap. His left has stayed by his side, limp.

“Jesus! Leon, how the fuck—?”

“Get him?” Leon asks— and this isn't the first time Chris has seen Leon speak through a blood-filled mouth, but this is even more unsettling because it is clotted, spills over his lips in clumps.

“Shoot him in the back. For me.” Leon eases his head back, grimacing. Showing the thick, dried bloody path that dripped down his throat, to his shirt. There is a dark stain around the knife hilt, smaller than Chris would initially expect—

“What?” Chris asks.

“Who?” Hunnigan asks in Chris’ ear, tone sharp.

“My partner. His knife,” Leon says, baring teeth. “Backstabbed— well, front-stabbed me.”

“Oh?” Hunnigan asks.

Chris does not know her real well, but he only needs to hear that singular word to know that Hunnigan is about to handle whatever unlucky sonofabitch thought they could get away with this.

Chris shifts his hand to Leon’s good shoulder, finding it hard to not stare at the fucking knife sticking out of Leon’s chest. No wonder they all thought Leon was dead— besides the knife in him— his chest is barely moving.

“Stay super still for me, Leon, you can't move right now—”

Leon’s smirk is faint, almost nothing more than a ghost of a twitch. “No worries, not moving. Don't think I can.”

“You don't have to do anything right now, Leon, just—”

“I can't, Chris. Can't feel anything below, well…”

Chris stumbles on what to say. Leon’s smirk grows.

“Damn, relax. Probably good I'm not feeling anything. That shit really hurt there for a while.”

Chris’ hand finds Leon’s, feels how cold and stiff his fingers are. He glances down. Under the blood, the skin is a dusty purple. Hypoxic.

“You really do like to shoot first, ask questions later, huh?” Piers asks, stepping close and kneeling down so Leon can see him, too.

Leon’s smile is barely there, but Chris can tell he made an attempt. “I, ah, don't usually have friendlies around me to worry about.”

Piers smiles back, badly. “Not if you act like that, you won't.”

“I don't want them,” Leon says. “My supposed friendly did this to me.” He takes a gulping, but still shallow breath. It is taking so much effort to talk. “Thought he was coming back to finish me off.”

Chris cannot help the shudder that runs down his spine. Leon would have killed him if his gun didn't jam. If he had even a little more strength to eject the round properly by not limp-wristing it. Not able to say that, Chris just lifts the pistol and angles it so Leon can see the case caught on the slide.

“Fuck,” Leon says. He clumsily touches the brass, then closes his eyes. “The last time that gun jammed like it, it saved me from being shot.”

“You’re the luckiest unluckiest man I've ever met,” Chris says.

The corner of Leon’s mouth twitches.

Piers is standing there to meet him, half-blocking the way to where Leon is—

“I can do it, Chris—”

“No, I will.”

Piers’ frown is unsteady. He has had less practice than Chris has; Chris won't make him to spare his own feelings. But when Chris steps past, Piers follows. A few strides behind, but still he follows. Chris does not have it in him to tell Piers not to.

It is part of the job. That's how it is. Eventually, something is going to take you out—

And classic Leon, not going down without a fight. Chris should expect nothing less. He counts seven BOWs in the hallway leading up to where Jacob is standing with two others from Bravo. They are in a rough semi-circle facing the body slumped against the wall, wedged against a beat up locker. Chris has to step over three more BOWs piled at the body's feet—

Chris hears his breath catch in his chest despite trying to prepare for it, for seeing familiar dirty blond bangs obscuring Leon’s face. His head is tilted down, knees to his chest, one arm in his lap. He is wearing dark clothes— nondescript combat gear, rare for Leon. All the good that did him.

“Damn it,” Chris breathes. As he kneels, he taps his earpiece to switch back to Hunnigan’s line. Kneeling doesn't give him much better view of Leon’s face, but that's him. Dried blood covering his chin, from—

Fucking christ, there is something sticking out of his chest— body armor, Leon was even wearing body armor this time and it still didn’t save him. Dark, patterned. Knife handle. BOWs don't use knives—

“Poor bastard got stabbed. Still went down swinging,” Jacob says, somber and reverent.

“Captain?” Hunnigan prompts in Chris’ silence.

“... we found him, Hunnigan. He— he didn't make it.”

Her silence only lasts a few seconds.

“You checked for a pulse?”

Chris takes a breath. “No, he's—”

“Check.”

Chris winces. “Hunnigan, he won't—”

“Confirm for me, Captain Redfield.” Her voice is flat but still strong. Better than what Chris can manage right now.

It must be standard operating procedure for her. Chris swallows. “Yes, ma’am.”

He pulls off one of his gloves, scanning over Leon’s body again. No other major injuries he can see. Other than the knife to the chest. It is a little left of center— when did someone have time to stab him in the middle of all of these BOWs? Unless Leon had been stabbed earlier and it took a while to bleed out. God, what a way to go.

Still, Chris is very glad he isn't infected. It is not a fate he wishes upon anyone. Taking another steadying breath, Chris presses two fingers to Leon’s neck.

Leon twitches. His hand jerks—

And Leon’s bloody handgun, drawn from his lap, presses into Chris’ throat as the trigger is squeezed by a red-stained finger.

[northsballadmoved]

a kiss between furrowed brows to try and comfort. ― @stormbcrn.

sansa doesn't realize she is thoroughly pouting until the shadow of the targaryen princess passes over her, cool lips gently pressing to the knot formed between her brows. she blinks and her expression softens, initially in surprise and then with a subdued warmth; a muted sigh passes from her lips as daenerys pulls away, raising her head whilst purging the slouch from her shoulders and sitting up straighter in her seat. how long she has been brooding silently over her now - lukewarm breakfast, she's certain she doesn't wish to know. it is a relief no one else had caught her, though the fact she was found out nonetheless brings the faintest tinge of blush to her cheeks.

❝ i'm alright, ❞ she assures quietly, extending a feeble smile and a grateful press to dany's hand. ❝ i think i might have underestimated how hard it would be to leave. to be away from everyone, and robb. ❞ not once in sixteen years have they been separated, not like this. and it's not as if she'll be alone; she'll have arya, her father, and her dream of a betrothed . . . but the more she ponders on it, the lonelier it seems. she doesn't like to linger on it -- so instinctually, she returns to how poorly she has been behaving. there is a quick albeit quiet breath, the slightest raise of her brows and then her features smooth into sheepish concern. ❝ i suppose no one's asked you how you're fairing with all of this? ❞

[lith-myathar]

.

[rustinsscohles]

okay so like. i got offered a job (yay!) and if i accept (which i probably will cause nothing else is coming my way) then i will definitely have to work another job to ya know. bring in enough money to live and sustain myself (which is fine just. tiring) but i don’t think the full time job would wear me out like the other full time jobs i’ve had in the past so going and doing part time work wouldn’t drain me too bad. so? i guess i have a job?