#but i also havent rlly caught up with the games so im finding out all these 'new' pokemon via the anime

[wp100]

picked up the pokemon anime again. gonna try and finish it as soon as i can.

i dont want to. i have one season left with ash then i might call it an... anime. i miiiiight give the new one a go, but there's no ash, so what's the point

[4unnyr0se]

Hi love your writing!! I havent touched HQ in 3 years but Im starting to love old characters I use to fall in love with like Asahi, Oikawa, Bokuto etc,,, so as my first req, could you pls write fem! Reader x Bokuto fluff in HS?

Like Bokuto trying to court the reader. How would that go? And how did he finally ask us out?

Feel free to ignore this if you dont like the idea! Ty for ur time 🤍❤️🤍

❥ young love at fukurodani | kotaro bokuto

warnings: none that i can think of. this is pure fluff

MDNI | No 18+ content, I just don't want minors interacting with my blog

word count -> 1.6k

okay so aaaa this didn't rlly follow the ask bc all he does is ask reader to tutor him and then cute stuff happens but i can make a hc of it probably tonight or tomorrow?? also i wrote this when i was having tummy issues so im very sorry if its horrible. i love u!

got a request? my asks are open!

Bokuto wasn’t one to get embarrassed that easily. Sure, he did embarrassing things but didn’t know they were embarrassing. They were part of his boyish charm, which people loved about him…right? Of course, they did. He was Kotaro Bokuto. He was Fukurodani’s ace, and the people loved him for it. So why, if he was so confident, did he get awkward and embarrassed around you, his pretty classmate?

Saying you were gorgeous was an understatement. He couldn’t find the right words to describe you to his friends, mainly Akaashi. “She’s just like, y’know? And I’m like, oh damn! She’s cute as fuck!” Boktuo would make various gestures with his hands as he and Akaashi sat on the steps leading to the gym, sipping cola from the vending machine. “What do I do, Akaashi? She’s so pretty, and I’m pretty too! The only problem is that everyone else in our year thinks so, too…do I even have a shot?”

Akaashi would offer him a pitiful smile, rubbing his back in assurance. “Well, isn’t she one of the smartest in our year?”

“Yeah, smart and pretty. She’s so fucking perfect, I wish you could see her.” he pouted.

“Well, the answer is simple,” Akaashi said, standing up and stretching his arms above his head. Ask her for help with homework; god knows you need it.”

“Hey! I got a 41 on my chemistry test!” Bokuto yelled at Akaashi as the setter entered the gym. But he did have a point, like always. Bokuto decided then and there that he would ask you to tutor him tomorrow, no matter how anxious he was. Anxiety was for suckers anyway.

“Hey, wait up!” Bokuto ran after you as you exited your classroom, papers flying out of his messy bookbag that was riddled with stains from only God knows what. “I gotta ask you a question!”

You stopped walking and turned your heel, raising an eyebrow as the Fukurodani captain barreled towards you. “Hey, what’s up, Bokuto? How’s volleyball going? Are we headed to nationals?” you asked, placing a hand on your hip. God, even the way you held yourself was perfect. Were you an actual goddess, or was Bokuto just lovestruck?

Bokuto finally caught up to you, leaning against the hallway walls in an attempt to appear suave and put-together. His messy uniform didn’t help his cause, but he forgot to look neat today. And every day after that. “Uh, I was wondering if you understood what we were assigned in English yesterday? I don’t understand any of it to save my skin, hah,” He rubbed the back of his neck, looking down at his shoes. “Did you get what our teacher was saying?”

“Yeah, it was really simple. Just basic grammar and syntax structures. Was it complicated for you?” you tilted your head to the side.

“I don’t really get it. Wanna tutor me at my house today? I can get you snacks!” he offered you a crooked smile, leaning forward so his golden eyes peered into yours. “C’mon, please? The coach will kick my ass if I don’t get my grades up, and I have a game next week! Pretty please?” he folded his hands in prayer, his bottom lip in a childish pout.

You smiled and nodded, grabbing him off the wall. Bokuto blushed at the sudden contact, noticing how neat you kept your fingernails compared to his own. Yours were neatly polished to perfection while he bit his nails almost constantly, and being a wing spiker didn’t come with having good-looking nails. 

“Where’s your house? Is it walking distance?” you let go of his hand, much to Bokuto’s dismay. 

“Yeah, it’s about five minutes from here. Wanna stop at a convenience store on the way? I’m really hungry.” he rubbed his stomach as you two walked out the nearest exit, your messenger bag dangling over your shoulder. 

“Only if you’re paying,” you joked, rubbing his shoulder. Bokuto could have sworn his heart stopped right then and there. Were you actually flirting with him, or were you just really touchy? Either way, it was a win in his book. 

“Sure, I don’t mind. Anything for a pretty girl like yo-” Bokuto stopped his sentence, smacking his hand over his mouth. “I-I mean, why wouldn’t I mind? I’m a captain, after all. It’s my job to provide for my teammates!”

“But I’m not on any sports teams. I’m not your teammate.” you deadpanned, 

“You know what I mean!” Bokuto whined, wiping his forehead of the sweat that was slowly starting to gather. “Damn, it’s a hot one today. Why won’t they let the guys wear shorts? Do they want us to die of heat stroke or something?”

“I honestly have no idea,” you sighed, walking under the shade of the convenience store roof. “Wait a minute,” you instructed, placing your messenger bag on the hot pavement. You shrugged off your school blazer and wrapped it around your waist tightly in an attempt to cool you off. You also rolled up the sleeves of your white blouse, loosening your collar. “Sorry, I’m just really warm. At least we get to wear skirts, right?” you offered him a lopsided smile.

Bokuto’s heart pounded in his chest. “Uh, yeah, you girls are so lucky. Wearing skirts must feel awesome.”

“It’s awesome until you catch someone trying to look it up,” you mumbled in annoyance, hoisting your bag over your shoulders. 

“What the actual fuck? Who was it? I’ll murder them! I'll text Konoha too; he’ll definitely want in on it,” Bokuto clenched his fists together, walking into the store with you. “I’m sorry that happened to you, honestly.

You shrugged your shoulder and rummaged through the ice cream pin, choosing a passionfruit-flavored ice bar. “It’s fine, don’t worry about it. I barely know you, anyways.”

“That doesn’t mean that I can’t protect you from jerks like that guy,” Bokuto angrily shoved his hands in his pockets, tapping his foot on the tile. He fished about 400 yen out of his pocket and handed it to the cashier, ushering you out of the shop as quickly as possible. 

“What was that for?” you asked, unwrapping the popsicle. 

“I didn’t like how he looked at you, that’s all.” Bokuto huffed. He made grabby motions for your bookbag, which you handed to him with a confused look on your features. “Let me carry that, please. You’re too pretty to carry heavy stuff around like that all day.”

You paused your walk and stared at Bokuto, blushing softly. “You think I’m pretty?” 

Bokuto slowly nodded and gave you a crooked smile, blushing in turn. “Yeah, I really do. I was afraid to tell you before, but now I’m all fired up. I wanna protect you from creeps, y’know?”

You popped the ice treat out of your mouth and stepped forward, smiling softly. “We barely know each other, and you want to keep me safe? We haven’t even hung out once.”

“We’re heading to my house right now, aren’t we?” Bokuto shrugged, his blush not fading. 

You chuckled and took another step forward, the tips of your noses brushing against each other. “Yeah, I guess we are,” you whispered, your lips dangerously close to his own. “You know, I always thought you were kind of cute. In the athletic kind of way, I suppose.”

Bokuto dropped the bags he held onto the hot concrete beneath you, praying they wouldn’t roll down the hill you were standing on. You two were in a remote location, and the tension was thick. “You think I’m cute?” he tilted his head to the side, his eyelids dropping halfway. 

“Mhm,” you purred, your popsicle dripping from the intense heat. “Super cute.”

“Fuck,” Bokuto’s hands hovered above your waist, unsure of what you wanted him to do. “Uh, is it okay if I kiss you? Please, cutie?” he quietly pleaded, your lips basically touching at this point. 

You smiled and nodded, holding your melting popsicle behind your back. “Mhm, it’s okay.”

Bokuto smiled as his lips interlocked with yours for a minute, savoring the sweet passionfruit flavor that coated them. His hands squeezed your waist childishly, never wanting this moment between the two of you to end. This kiss was exactly how he dreamed it would be, soft and perfect. Just like you.

You pulled away after a bit and giggled, your popsicle having since fallen onto the heated pavement. Your sticky hands cupped his face, the pads of your thumbs running over his defined cheekbones. “You’re a good kisser,” you pecked his forehead bravely. “Like, a really good kisser.”

“Same to you, cutie,” his hands left your waist, choosing to instead secure your wrists. “You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to do that. So. Fucking. Long.”

 A chuckle escaped your lips as your hands fell to your waist again, intertwining your fingers with Bokuto’s. You had never notified it before, but he was much bigger than you. It made you feel safe and secure. Protected. “We should probably get to your house to study, shouldn’t we?” 

“Aw, I was having so much fun kissing you on the sidewalk!” Bokuto pretended to whine, kicking a loose pebble that was in his way. He easily picked up the bags with his spare hand and tossed them over his broad shoulder. 

“Tell you what,” you squeezed his hand. “For every question you get right, I’ll give you a kiss. Does that sound like a fair deal?”

“Hell yeah, it does!” Bokuto kissed you on the cheek in excitement. He practically skipped to his house with you in tow, excited for what the rest of the day would have in store.

[offical-ranter]

SPOILERS FOR THE ANIMATED SUBWAY SURFERS

i completely forgot they were making a series for this. i heard about it on tiktok years ago and promptly forgot about it. i mean i loved the game as a kid, but i expected the show to be kinda meh. its good, not like super great, but cause my expectations were so low it seems a lot better. anyway, once more, heres a list of random thoughts

-animation. its decent. it looks like 2d and then a lot of cgi. i wouldnt rlly be able to tell if they use 3d models but i dont think they do. the characters also look almost exactly like they do in the game. ofc its better quality but they already had natural proportions so there wasnt a big change needed

-plot. now im not saying its any gravity falls (10 year anniversary coming soon thats cool) but it has things sprinkled thruout the plot u dont notice until some other details revealed. like Frank, ofc i noticed the eye and him walking away, but him in the park and audience? i was like, holy sht, how did they do that?? not to mention the secret organization thats spying on them, their brought up sometimes. who knows, maybe their symbol is in the background somewhere and i didnt notice

-episode structure. idk if its only me, but it feels out of order. like the 1st episode they find the alien tech, but its in ep. 10 Yutani uses it to make a hoverboard, even tho Jake in ep. 2 slips up and says hoverboard instead of skateboard. also after they discover the tech, ep. 1 ends, but pics up ep. 10 where Jake runs away from Guard afterwards. this chase continues ep. 11 (which makes sense chronologically) but when he gets caught in the end, its ep. 2 where Guard takes him home. idk if this is intentional, but to me it seems like ep. 10+11 should be before ep. 2. the only reason i can think of them doing this is if they wanted a lot of the lore to be hidden until the last few episodes

-backstory. i havent played the game in years, and even then i only ever played, so ive no clue if theres lore already. but i do like the backstories given to the characters. Jake being the leader, spraypainter, having a single mom, and loving to eat. Fresh loving his shoes and boombox, and having a big family (i think i counted 6 others who lived with him) who all love music. Tricky who was a single child of rich parents, forced to do ballet, but wanting to street dance. Yutani whos super smart, isnt very good at skateboarding, and is adopted. even Frank, who doesnt have any backstory, seems rlly cool and his mystery makes him rlly interesting

-the website. why is it so cool? this is for a game from 2012, why is the website cool. it has no right. anyway it has a theme, like its the secret spy organizations files (the first thing u see if their symbol and the word archives in a cool font). u literally have a cool robotic women voice who reads info on all the characters. and the freaken locked thing at the bottom

-side notes: i was thinking Yutani's va sounded familiar, and its cause she also voices Amy from sonic boom. i only recognized it cause ive seen a few compilation from it on yt reccently. hell, i only watched this cause it was on my fyp. heres the yt vid i used for ep. 1-10, and heres the one for 11. the website has them all but idk if they all work

[pinkykitten]

everything stays

chapter 1 - blood on her hands :: gisela klein [ an aot oc story ] 

note: hey guys i know its been a rlly long time since ive posted anything and u may be rlly let down and underwhelmed that ive chosen to write a aot oc instead of fanfic but its what i want to write and i rlly love my oc and wanna give her some love and some praise and let u a little in how i see her. im sorry i havent posted a lot im going to try to write more and who knows i may or may not finish this but its ok imma try lol but life sometimes is a butthole. i hope you love her as much as i do an tysm for taking time out of ur day to read this story. enjoy!

Even though she knew that this day would have to come and that it was near, it still was a surprise for her. She was taken aback. It didn’t make sense and add up to her; she was trained for this since she was little; preparing mentally and physically for phase one of the plan; and the day appeared through the trees; past the wall; the opportunity was present; the fate of the people were waiting in their hands; and yet she felt a sense of evilness within her heart. Was this right? But there was no time. 

The day was written down in history. The stories were spread around like a disease. Heights, jaws, teeth, feet, stench, the screams. If they survived that nightmare they were seen as a tough soldier; as someone that was applauded because they probably had PTSD and had to see everyday as a reason within themselves or God that they were alive. That maybe just maybe they were saved for a reason; for a purpose. That is what Gisela Klein thought. Maybe there was something greater out there for her to do, to accomplish and that was why she saw another day; breathed another breath. 

But one thing was for sure. Forgiveness would never come her way; she would never expect it. To be a warrior she had to endure the horror; the pain; feelings of worthlessness; and friendships lost. 

This is the story of the 10th finding titan; the Slash Titan.

The pounding of her heart rang through her ears. It had taken everything for her to keep going on this journey; to continue on the path to and through Hell. She felt a loss within her and the light in her eyes died out. The loss of her friend made it hard for her to function. To keep her head in the game and in the plan. 

She sighed as she stared at her hands. Broken and bruised like her heart; scars and scratches scattered on her skin. Her bite mark deeply engraved into her flesh. She heaved a huge sigh. Ready to give death a handshake and make a deal with the devil. Panic was rising in her chest from her stomach, almost ready to throw up. 

As she thought about her family back home she realized there was no other way; she had to do this. In order to be with her family, to save them she had to do the one thing she was trained to do. 

Kill.

A lightning strike shot over the wall. The wall that kept the monsters away and at bay. Something was wrong; the air seemed to change. The lightning strike caused a boom, clap and the ground started to shake. 

Bertholdt drew his leg back and with full force swung his leg forward, knocking a hole into the wall that was impenetrable. Many people flew back from the wind of the blow and some were crushed by the debris of the wall. 

Many were going to die; but it’s what needed to be done. 

The titans were called. 

Finally the titans entered the devils homes and started to rip up their lives. “This is right, this is right.” Gisela had to keep reminding herself. “For my family.” And something snapped within her. The image of her mother, tortured, flashed in her mind. And suddenly everything was worth it. “No regrets.”

Gisela eyed Reiner, an agreement, a sign. She exhaled and in a quick motion placed her hand to her mouth and bit into it. In a spark she transformed into her titan form. Her eyes were much like a cats, sharp. She was made into the slash titan, she was chosen for this program. Her titans fingers were like sharp knives, able to cut any object or person. They hung a little past her knees. 

Reiner then transformed and both stomped past the hole. Many citizens glanced up, horrified. Gisela and Reiner were titans never seen before. 

She nodded to Reiner, bent down and started to pick up debris and pieces of houses to throw over the bigger wall. The chunks started to smash against people. Blood splattering everywhere. Gisela almost wanted to close her eyes from the immense amount of dead bodies piled on top of others, graves upon graves. 

She was hauling boulders as high and fast as she could. Her titan held a high amount of power and strength. Being slim, muscular and as tall as the armored titan and female titan. Reiner took a step back and gained his speed to go onward to destroy the bigger wall. 

“Fire!” Their soldiers cried out. Fear evident on their face. They shot their cannons, not even slowing down Reiner. Gisela continued flinging, wanting to create a path for Reiner. She was faster than before and many of her hits flattened the men in the front lines. Their screams and cries loud. 

“Close the gate!” They tried, it was their last hope to save humanity. But it was not enough. Reiner broke the wall and killed those running and they went flying. They reached even higher than Gisela. It astounded her almost, they seemed like helpless birds flying high in the sky; but that thought was quickly wiped clean because the second they flew up in the air they came straight down with much force that many parts of their bodies broke. 

Reiner did what he needed to do, he opened up a way for the titans to get in and they were swarming by the bunches. 

In the distance, the survivors fled in boats across the river to get into the other walls. Gisela put herself in their shoes for a second. They had reason to be scared. Everything they have ever known was gone; their houses, loved ones, food, a place to feel the most comfortable you can feel despite situations; it was all gone. Gisela shook the thought out, not caring about these cruel humans feelings. They had none. No emotions. Gisela had to believe that thought; what she was told, she had to believe it with all her heart, or else what was real?

They waited till they were able to not be seen and Gisela turned human first and then so did Reiner. The four of them hopped on the boat. Talking amongst themselves. The wind howled through the vacant homes. Destruction everywhere. Gisela looked around her setting and saw a little girl had been crushed because a tree fell on her, her doll mere inches away from her grasp. She died with her eyes open; almost looking into Gisela’s soul through the eyes. Gisela’s body trembled and she threw up. 

“Don’t.”

Gisela looked up to see Reiner wiping blood and debris off his clothes. He picked his sleeve and turned Gisela’s head to look away, he wiped her chin and mouth off the puke. He saw the trauma in her eyes and felt guilty. But it’s what needed to be done. He kept telling himself that the more he did this the more he would understand and get used to it. It was still all new to her and he had to be strong for her. He knelt in front of her small frame. “It’s not your fault. They needed to die. We are in this together. You don’t need them. Look at me.”

Gisela looked into his eyes, away from the sadness. His eyes carried the feeling of wanting to be wanted. That was always what Reiner wanted. But they also had fear in his eyes. 

“Stop acting like you’re in control when I know how sick you feel. I know how afraid you are Reiner.”

He paused and took a look at his hands and others surrounding him. “You’re right. But I made a promise to Marcel.”

They joined the other citizens arriving at the food reserves. The master of disguise was needed in this mission. People needed to see four hungry, depressed children that survived the fall of their homes, not mass murderers. 

Annie was only able to fetch two loaves. “Alright, who's the most hungry?”

“You girls should eat, you’re more feeble.” Bertholdt sat on a crate, pointing to Gisela and Annie. 

Annie tsked, moving a bang from her eyes, “who says girls are more feeble? I recall kicking your ass all those times in training.”

“You guys can eat it, I’m not hungry.” Gisela sat on the other crate and saw the chaos of the crowds. A boy caught her interest. He had dark brown hair, tan skin, and light blue green eyes. He was having bread shoved in his mouth and he seemed to have such a strong personality to him. If only Gisela felt so strongly about her motive and her placement in this life. 

“You really should eat, you need your energy after all you did.” Annie broke all the loaves in half and shared it amongst the four of you. “It’s not much but at least it's something.”

Gisela sighed, “you’re right. Thanks.”

After that day there was land given to only a few refugees but there were too many of them. Luckily the four of them had a piece of land that was enough until further inching themselves within society. Through that whole span each day was getting easier and easier living with the lies and day by day Gisela felt more at sure with herself and knowing that she could fulfill this mission. Pills and alcohol helped the pain and ease the thoughts. She taught herself to put a gap between what she came here to do and feelings. She told herself every day that nobody else mattered except her family and Reiner. She trained her brain to not care, to not have strings attached or any love for anything. It was all a play, all a rehearsal for when the curtain would fall. She was readying herself for that fall. Everyday she educated herself more on these scums. What they liked, wanted, needed, craved for, and what they craved more than ever in their life was freedom. 

She trained her body as if it were her last day, barely getting sleep. The face of her mother haunting her every night making her get up at three in the morning to do pushups or sit ups. Not only was her mind getting stronger but also her body. Even Reiner would make jokes noticing the muscles that would appear. The six pack that formed on her stomach. Her thighs growing tight and firm, her arms growing stronger. The sweat growing on her forehead longer. 

With her body growing her relationship with Reiner also changed. They no longer were the tiny children that didn’t understand anatomy or the air between two people. Reiner and Gisela’s relationship was of being flirty, sharing a few kisses here and there, trying to be a couple but then yelling at each other and breaking it up and realizing maybe this isn’t right a million times. Even Bertholdt and Annie were getting tired of their outbursts. But each time they made up to be friends only and then the cycle started where the feelings came in the way and they wanted to be more. They would tease each other, especially Reiner. They were each other's best friends. Gisela was like one of the boys, loud, obnoxious, burping all the time, Reiner would get a look at her and smirk thinking he taught her well. When Reiner looked at her he felt at home and that everything was going to be okay. Her nightmares continued and each time Reiner would come to her room and hold her, let her cry into his arms. She felt he was the only person that knew her pain. 

Gisela understood many things in life and for once she understood her life here, she understood why she was born and chosen. 

It was the following year and in order to get closer to finding the founding titan the four became part of the 104th cadet corps. 

“Are you ready to train more?” Gisela nudged Reiner, eyebrow raised.

“What do you mean train more? This is going to be a new but scary experience honestly.” Reiner spoke as if he was a different person. As if he didn’t have a life outside of the walls. 

“Reiner?” Gisela placed her hand on his shoulder, steadying him. He looked fine on the outside but Gisela knew the issues were inside, his mind. She knew this was becoming disastrous to him, he was starting to have almost two personalities, two lives, two worlds, two people. Gisela tried to tell Annie or Bertholdt, they saw it too but there was nothing they could do. 

All that Gisela could do was smile as they made their way to the first day of training. 

note: again ty y’all sm!!!! If u liked it lmk and this is kinda new for me cuz I usually don’t post my ocs stories here or much at all but I’m rlly excited for y’all to see her and for y’all to know this oc of mine and hopefully accept her ❤️

Taglist: @witchofinterest @chlobenet @eddysocs @fpxloomis @whctsherncme-archive @ocfairygodmother @fandomchick80 @ocappreciationtag

[seijch]

ANNOUNCEMENT: NOT A HELLO, BUT NOT A GOODBYE EITHER

omg hi ... im like . ashamed to come back after saying brief hiatus in october and then disappearing off the face of the earth til FEBRUARY but under the cut i will be explaining myself and the following, if youre interested (and a tl;dr at the very bottom if you don’t wanna scroll thru this obnoxiously long post):

the reason(s) i was gone for so long

what i was doing during that time (its just a personal account yall can scroll past this idrc)

the status of those um . halloween requests

the future of this account

i. so . Hiatus .

i know. i know . i probably mentioned it when i made the announcement post, but my mental health likes to go on one of those rides. yknow the ones where you go like up rlly fast then down maybe and then up then DOWN .... its like that. i needed a break and every time i wanted to come back or thought about it, something would happen and i would get stuck in my own head.

a big reason for getting stuck in my head was (and i hate to admit this ... i hate to admit that i have Insecurities On The Internet) my feelings of inadequacy regarding my writing. i love to plot fics, i love concepts and characters and making little headcanons but i dont ... know if i love writing rn. and i thought for the longest time that like . whatever ill just push thru it its fine ill be fine but it kinda wasnt lmao you can kinda see it in my halloween reqs and what become of them when i get to that but i began to feel like nothing i had put out or would put out would hold up prose wise (and normally i dont feel like this im much more “idc its my life im living it” but thats not a rant for tumblr LMAO). i still feel like that -- like im better as a reader than a writer. but . You Know :-)

tl;dr: mental state go brrrrr

ii. anywhere here’s wonderwall

when i left, i was in a steadily decreasing mental and emotional state, made worse by a situation at work that really was a case of petty jealousy on my end and rlly isnt very consequential now despite how much pain and resentment it gave me when it Was a problem so i wont get into it. the tl;dr of november and december was me using work as an crutch and distraction -- i know my job, i do it well, it helped me not think about my responsibilities and obligations and inadequacies. of course, as the holiday season grew busier n busier i was scheduled so often that i moved 88 or so miles (according to my apple watch, which i ONLY wear at work since im never anywhere else outside my house) and fell into a cycle of showering n sleeping at my house before going back the next day. (theres definitely something to be said abt capitalism and “grind culture” here but once again its not the time or place snsjkdfds)

at the turn of the new year, i happened to remember a birthday card i hadnt filed away for safekeeping from a friend of mine that id been horribly out of touch with til that point. i started crying because i realized how out of touch id been in general up until that point. the month of january was great for me: i was focused, happy, and in a much better place than i had been before. the end of it brought me down focus wise and im hoping that enough time away from my distractions will refocus me bc i ... need it LMAO and though ive burned out from that level of productivity and gotten distracted again im ... trying to stay positive which i think is the most i can do 😁👍🏼

media wise, i got real into stardew valley (but burned out bc i played it extensively as a way to wind down after work), the pokemon platinum romhack renegade platinum (still havent finished it bc of school n i played it w the intent to see if i could nuzlocke it ... bitch its so hard but its so fun bc of it), briefly assassins creed: odyssey (im one of those ppl who completes an entire region before i move to the next so you can tell i burned out of that one + wouldnt have the time to properly devote to it even if i didnt), got back into genshin impact after pulling for xiao (after not touching it for like . months), and danganronpa. yes . danganronpa 😐 i Know. i stopped playing it after the second trial of the first game bc i was so hurt by the outcome and picked it up in late january only to get sucked in (thank god i had the foresight to buy the second and third games during the steam winter sale). rn im at the start of chapter 4 if anyone wants to come in my asks and um . talk to me abt danganronpa

tl;dr: I’m Into Danganronpa Now

iii. you realize halloween was three months ago right

i mentioned this in the first section, but i love to plot things. every request is plotted or at least has a solid foundation. i had fun detailing what concept i wanted to go with considering what i was given, and there were some bangers i might touch up in the future. but heres whats going to happen to the requests themselves:

there are two finished requests. one will be posted tomorrow and the other will be touched up (just bc i finished it doesnt mean its good 🧍‍♂️) and scheduled for next saturday. as for the ones i never got around to ...

i will not be finishing those requests. i hate to be That Person, but i feel like we all expected this 🧍‍♂️ what i will do is post all of my notes for each request in batches -- requests that have an @ to go with them will be mentioned in the post proper, but anon asks will be pictured. (there are some asks that came from blogs who are now deactivated but i wrote down all the prompts and remember most of those askers so ill cross that bridge when i get there) there will most likely be an excerpt or two simply bc i think i mightve written a few plot points or interactions in the form of bullet points. i rlly am sorry about doing this but i remember looking at my notion doc with all the prompts and feeling ... like i wasnt measuring up n it wasnt just to myself or to some intangible concept of “other” id constructed but it was instead to those who requested n actually WANTED to see and hear and read my writing and i ...... im gonna admit thats another big reason i avoided this site.

regardless, youll definitely get what i have (and likely more than just my bullet points and illegible handwriting).

tl;dr: im sorry. what i have in terms of plot, concept, and interaction for every request will be posted, but i cant say ill ever complete them and mean it.

iv. so what now?

well i mean . im not entirely sure how sold i am on haikyuu in the content creation department (as a creator n to a lesser extent, as a consumer). as mentioned previously, its no longer my primary focus. it doesnt mean im not into haikyuu anymore; i have a lot of love for those boys but i cant rlly say im even caught up w recent fandom activity and also havent even finished s4 pt2 LMAO thats on my to do list

and despite all that, i still want to share my plots n concepts and snippets and maybe even fics. it wont happen anytime soon. it might not even happen. but i mean . its better than me saying i wont write ever again shjdkfs but either way ill probably use this blog as a personal blog w the occasional ask game for dialogue prompts (those are always so fun i love making up aus to fit like . the most mundane prompts)

as for my works (past and any potential future), ive opened an ao3 acc here n ill be editing n possibly expanding on my old works to post there. tumblr, to me, is The x reader hub, but i figure more x reader fics on ao3 is never a bad thing.

ill be deleting/posting drafted posts to the queue since they were all meant to be queued anyway as well as (sorry again 🧍‍♂️) deleting or answering asks in the inbox. (moots if you get a notif from me saying i rbed your post from months ago ... mind your business) im very hard to get ahold of and its ... a problem. expect an overhaul of the nav n shit to reflect my new direction n also because i feel like i cant tell if my passion for carrd is shared by the majority HSDKLFS maybe its better to read my info in a normal post ykwim .......

and of course . if youve read all this n decided im no longer worth the follow, i sure as hell cant stop you. thank you for wanting to, at some point, hear what i have to say -- it means more than you think.

tl;dr: writing will be edited and reposted to ao3, this blog will be a personal blog with a hint of writing (sometimes)

the tl;dr to end all tl;drs:

im back! i wont be as active as i used to due to a lessened interest in haikyuu in general, but i have an ao3 acc now where all my past work will be edited, possibly expanded, and reposted. any future work will also find itself there. my halloween requests will be posted in batches as incomplete concepts, plots, and snippets of scenes; i wont be promising to finish any of them.

there are still fic concepts im attached to and want to finish, but i cant promise any more writing on my end. this blog will be a personal blog with maybe writing, not a writing blog with my personal thoughts all over it.

regardless if you stick around or not, its been crazy sexy cool (equal emphasis) being on haikyuu tumblr even tho i wasnt around for long ... even tho its not my main focus anymore, im still excited to see what the future might hold 🤝

love, ari 💌

[wincore]

AHHHH ive been working all weekend at my part time job and reading ur wips/ideas literally got me thru it!!

WHEN U CATCH UP ON HAIKYUU U GOTTA LET ME KNOWWW omg who was ur favorite character from what u watched?? mine is kuroo & atsumu (s4)!! if u have any anime or drama reccs id gladly take them 🤲🏻🤲🏻

when do you hear back abt grad school btw!! :o like what’s the timeline for applying & hearing back?

OFC I LIKE THEM?? I LIKE ALL UR IDEAS!!!

DISOBEYING FATE??? does this mean 2 ppl who are nonsoulmates are pretending to be together/are together 👀👀 IS THIS GONNA BE ANGSTY!! u know i live for the tension... and u know i love the way u write it!!!! a more flirty and annoying yn sounds so fun to read omg

“this fashion designer fic is dedicated to you tata 💝” IM HONORED TO CONTRIBUTE TO TAEYONG’S DUNGEON ESCAPE HWHSHJSJ will there be runway character cameos 😳😳

“AFTER TWILIGHT” HELP MEEEEE i cant tell who in nomin is edward and who’s jacob.... jeno edward?? LOL

EVERY ROMANCE PLOT SUITS JAEMIN OMGGG SO TRUE WAIT THAT REMINDS ME pls tell me the tropes/plots that u associate with the members!! or which tropes u think suit them well, any pairings that rlly stand out to u. obviously we are both pro e2l & doyoung HSJWJJS but who/what else!!! i am a person fan of yukhei with the f2l/campus crush/heartthrob bestie trope.

ALSO i kinda went off the grid around the time u did that poll about people’s favorite fanfic tropes/plots so i didn’t see any updates on it!! did u find anything interesting from that survey?? :o

I HOPE UR HAVING A GOOD WEEK MOONIE 💛

- tata 💖

THAT MAKES ME SO HAPPY AHHH omg i hope your part time offers enough wage for all that work!!! i would be so mad if i had to work over the weekend (but.. then again.. i’m aiming for ..corporate jobs..)

OMG omg okay this is going to get REALLY longer now tata!!!! i think this is where i should include a keep reading 😭

LET ME TELL YOU I HAD THIS MASSIVE CRUSH ON OIKAWA like his character just got to me!! i think i even wrote a character analysis for him back then LOL when i tell you 15 year old me was absolutely enamored with a 2d man. i loved kuroo too omg and the whole nekoma team he was just so chill i wanted to be him 🤩 and i’ve seen pictures of atsumu from my friends!!! who keep spamming me bc they too are in love with 2d men and he looks like someone who would cause problems on purpose but that could just be me sdkdhsj 

and ooh, i have so many dramas/animes i’ve been meaning to watch but recently in kdramas, i watched run on which was super cute and i love the female lead; extracurricular oh BOY i love this. i love thrillers and crime fiction. like SO much. it’s a shame i can’t make my own 😔; and now i’m currently watching vincenzo which is a dark comedy about a korean-italian mafia man and it’s rlly funny at times and also i like the theme of evil fights evil bc i am tired of main characters with moral compasses 🙄🙄 it’s ongoing though!! my friends recommended true beauty and love alarm to me but the way they are sobbing over it i am very afraid. i was also planning to watch perfect crime (jdrama) bc my friend is obsessed with sakurada dori. <3

my all time fav animes are still one piece (which i still havent caught up with bc i am so slow) and demon slayer!! i havent watched much anime recently but i watched the ancient animagus’ bride (?? i think that’s the name?) it’s got SUPER pretty visuals and i was in awe of the animation most of the time.

i also watched this japanese movie fairly recently called shoplifters and it’s also crime technically but discusses more of japanese poverty and my feelings throughout the movie were like 📈📉📈📉 and it’s so well directed!!! i think it’s the same director as for after the storm!! idk if you’ve watched that but it was really good too!

i apply to grad school next year!! i’ll be joining in the fall semester so i have to get stuff ready by april and that’s when most of the applications start!! the scholarship im aiming for begins earlier though and like. ma’am slow down i don’t even get my degree that early i’ll have to use a provisional certificate now😭

YES about the soulmates omg hhh the official synopsis is this: 

if finding your soulmate is the same as a damn game of russian roulette, you are determined to not pull the trigger at all. except, you know who your soulmate is and he doesn’t—and given a choice to pretend, you find that jaehyun is the lesser of the two burdens to bear.

like jaehyun is not the soulmate but yn doesn’t want her soulmate bc a) he’s in a relationship and doesn’t rlly care about the soulmate system which hurt bc she’s even lonelier now 😔 and b) she thinks money > love but that’s just a coping mechanism for being a lonely (and romantically repressed) person as is her being annoying and nosy LOL. i will end the analysis of my own character here jshgdksh

YES TO RUNWAY CHARACTER CAMEOS and yes you are literally the reason taeyong is escaping the dungeon

PLS neither jeno or nomin can be blue screen filtered brooding men i would be so uncomfortable 😭😭 IMD YING DGKSHDK if jeno plays edward i need him to that apple scene like taemin did ♥

okay so i have nct dream categorized in this way (i feel like it’s kind of biased towards bff2l whoops):

bff2l - mark, jeno, jaemin, jisung

e2l - haechan, renjun

either - chenle

but adding to that, lucas is definitely the campus crush bff you’re secretly in love with but you just can’t tell him!!! he’s too hot and popular for his own good!!!! but a series of romcom-esque events will help you probably LOL (bonus points if it’s fake dating)

if it isn’t e2l with doyoung i will respectfully not accept it as valid ❤

i also associate xiaojun with bff2l likee they’re always together on campus to the point that people think they’re dating also xiaojun majors in music and gets complimented on his lyricism often but like every song’s about you lol and one day he’s like wait is it copyright infringement if he’s using your existence in his songs bc boy are you a work of art ;)

i think sicheng would do REALLY well in royalty aus like hello??? he already has the looks and the poise. also chaebol aus might also work bc what are corporate businesses but modern day kingdoms </3 bonus points if it’s e2l but idk how you beefing with sicheng would work like . i don’t think he can fight like ever y/n will bench press him.

jaehyun is another person who seems to go with any vibe/plot like mans really said i will not give you any onscreen idol personality to work with ❤ 

i think most of them would pair well with bff2l?? they are all so silly and seem like they’d be great friends LOL except they’re too good looking.

and oh!!! i don’t think i posted the results OOPS let me add them real quick.

the readability is low on this bc google sacrificed that for uniformity 🙄

but the ones i had as options were (in the same order):

i hope you have a great wekk too tata!!!!!! answering this ask boosted my energy for the week 🥰🌼

[tfw-no-tennis]

One Piece Readthru

heyo ive decided its time for me to catch up on the one piece manga finally!! i last read it uhhh sometime late 2018?? MAYBE early 2019....anyways ill be liveblogging it, basically for myself but if anyone is interested then enjoy lol

so w.out further ado hers 927-931 hya 

uh ok i left off kinda in the middle of the wano arc, so im scanning thru some stuff to see what i remember.....i dont really remember what the deal is with that ginger (?) pompadour guy lmao. theres a lot of new characters and intricate politics in this arc from what i remember. 

i havent really gotten spoiled for anything....i know that something bad happens to kid & killer, somethins up w/sabo (but we dont know what), luffy fights kaido (more than once i think?) uhhhhh we get roger flashbacks and hear the yonkous bounties....thats abt all i really know. so im hype to find out what else has gone on....

im gonna start around 927, i defs read this but i want a refresher 

wow its amazing how sanji can oscillate so fast from being unbearable and annoying to like one of my favs

i loveeee the panels where those dudes start trashing sanjis soba stand and usopps like lol lets back up yall we KNOW sanjis boutta kick some righteous ass....YESSS

franky supplexing a guy....ily franky 

toko!!! i forgot abt her!!! cute kid, whats her deal? iirc she works at the uhhh wherever komurasaki works and she almost gets murderized later

sanji and little kids is so cute ;_; more of that and less stuff of him being gross w/women 

ok exposition....i do remember a lot of this

928, i feel like i remember this stuff so ill kinda blow thru it 

oh yeah i remember luffy n the prison shennanigans....good times

and kidds here too, talkin abt how he lost his arm trying to fight shanks...lol dude 

dude is really like oh i couldnt take down shanks, so ill aim for a different yonkou, im sure this will go much better a second time (and down an arm)

omfg i forgot abt this dude who apparently sold his FAMILY to get money for komurasaki....

i think we’re supposed to feel bad for this dude and think komurasaki is cruel or w/e but man honestly i just respect the hustle. girl knows whats up

HVBJSDKFBDS I FORGOT THE HILARIOUS LINE WHERE SHES LIKE ‘I HATE POOR PEOPLE <3′ IM....its literally like a weird twitter shitpost lmaooo

they cut immediately from komurasaki to tama asking momo if he has a sister....LMAO SUBTLE......

i dont even remember if that twist was spoiled for me, but either way it was my like immediate thought upon komurasakis intro lmao 

ok 929!

omg kanjuro selling some-drawn fish lol

OUGHHH CARROT AND THE OTHER MINKS....i miss carrot sm i hope she shows up more :( i really wish she would join the crew....

lmao that guy calling zoro a pretty boy and saying girls are probably all over him....zoros like uh ew no im gay 

OOOH PLOT SHITTTTT....caesar and doflamingo name drops...

VEGAPUNK HM [eyes emojiey]

orochis defs gonna get fucked up at some point. his design reminds me of wapol and other like corrupt king archetypes 

oguhfdbsjkgjdfbh laws head basket i forgot abt that. also i love when people call him traffy thats weirdly cute 

oh right the other supernovas who became kaidous bitches are here to fight...i recall that fight somewhat 

920 time! 

oh yeah the weird place where all the poor starving people laugh constantly...inch resting

OHH YEAH BIG MOM!!! man i definitely read a lot further than this lmao. w/e i was SO fucking hype when she showed up, imo the whole amnesia thing is pretty lame. we’ll see where it goes tho 

the art here is just so good oh man. the panel of big moms ship charging up the waterfall while she laughs? fantastic 

EPIC arrival. i hope big mom gets to do cool stuff even despite the impending amnesia

i ALSO hope her kids get to do cool shit too. im still holding out for a zoro vs amande battle (if shes even there? i dont see her, but thatd be such a waste)...and smoothie vs robin....

and she wants zeus back....NAMI FIGHT??? PLEASE???

oh its bdsm dinosaur guy....hmm never thought id type that

LMAOOOO law is like Dont You Dare Fucking Snitch On Us and usopp is like uh luffy pls come pick me up this guy is too hardcore

FINAL BATTLE thats so dramatic law please

sanji saying he’ll protect usopp omfg

oooh theyre destorying all the soba shops....here comes sanji to bring the PAIN

OMFG THE RAID SUIT i forgot he busts that out....hilariously quickly all things considered

931! ok but first my obligatory thots on how sad i am abt how the women of op look nowadays lmao revisiting old one piece just makes it all the more obvious how ridiculous its gotten....like nami and robin dont even look human, its insane, and the sameface has gotten so bad...idk i miss when op women used to look normal and could just exist without being Sexy Women bc that was a thing at the beginning and i really loved that...now its just like wow all titty no waist legs are 100x longer than normal....not to mention the writing for women in op has gone way downhill...ugh. ANYWAYS onward 

ofc as soon as i say that theres a rlly cute and p normal looking cover w/nami...i love her sm shes my fav character thats part of the reason this bothers me so much lol 

i miss her short hair tho...the long hair is pretty and i like her different hairstyles but i defs prefer the short spunky look. i wish she wouldve gotten a cool bellmere-esque haircut after the timeskip at least

ok im p sure i didnt read this...? i dont remember hgbvhjaksdfk

GERMA THEME SONG HBVJSDUIFJBSF are you telling me that the raid suit activation process involves a THEME SONG....please i need to hear this. thats so fuckign funny

‘GERMAAAAAAAAAAA’ [sanji doing an unironic magical girl transformation] IT CANT BE OVERSTATED HOW HILARIOUS AND AMAZING THIS IS LMAOOOOOO 

i think we saw this w/his siblings during whole cake but i forget lmao

of course franky and usopp are like OOOH FUCK YEAH 

HHBDSJKFJSB the implications of law knowing Exactly who that is....like i really need to see an omake of a campy power rangers/sentai/whatever-esque show/comic with all these germa personas omfgggggggg

and law having read the comics is SO funny 

also. sanjis hair is SO unfortunate lmaooo

O SOBA MASK HBVHSJDKUFJBDSK

germa was the bad guy group in the comics....good lmao 

law was defs a fan he knows ALL the lore LMAOOO

A BABY SANJI....and then sanji being weird. skip! 

ironic hows theyre like oh shit gotta challenge this dude so he doesnt destroy the town and their fight is gonna level the place anyways lmao 

oh i did read this i think cause i remember all those ninja busting robin for sneaking around

which ok theyre ninja but robin could grow eyes for surveillance so it doesnt make much sense that shed be caught so easily...alas

THAT GUYS HEAD HBVHJFKD LMAO

oh yeah then big mom washes up w/amnesia lmao. i hope that plotline doesnt suck, i dont have too much hope...normally i really like amnesia plotlines and honestly i think itd be cool to explore w/like one of the strawhats but in this case it just seems kinda like a lazy way to take big mom out of the game :/ my prediction is she’ll get her memory back at a certain time thats convenient to the plot, just in time for like an all out war w/kaidou and the straw hats and the yakuza maybe? we shall see (possibly) 

ok its past 6 am so its bedtime. more later! 

[skepsys]

tell us more about your two lovely OCs please! how did they meet? how did their ship start? :eyes:

oOOOHGFGGGGG BOYYY Okay well ive only had them for about a week or so? two weeks? not very long so some things are still prettyyyyy loose/vague, despite HOW MUCH time ive been putting into them LOL but there’s some pretty solid building blocks regardless so Here We Go

to clarify ahead of time in case i havent already somewhere, SAINT is the robot with the toothy mask and Maverick is the guy with the white jacket

READMORE CAUSE HOLY FUCK THIS GOT LONG

ill be honest, they start off trying to kill and generally being pretty nasty to each other....! they’re both assassin/hitman/mercenary types so theres naturally a lot of rivalry there over who gets the real good jobs and stuff, but it’s made pretty personal right off the bat because Maverick is very smug and annoying and from the second he meets SAINT he makes sure to make it ABUNDANTLY clear that he’s better than him.  Maverick’s been in the game a lot longer than SAINT; the first time SAINT ever takes a job, he shows up to crash it and steal this Super Secret technology he had been sent to grab (which he was going to do ANYWAYS bc it was tech related to human augmentation, which he’s a Big Fan of, but SAINT getting there first presented him an opportunity to be an aggravating show-off, which of course he couldn’t resist...).  underneath the snarky flair with which he one-ups and outmaneuvers SAINT in this first encounter there’s a pretty serious threat to step off his turf Or Else, which as i said sparks a pretty bitter, intense rivalry

they spend a Good Long While beating the shit out of each other, like its ON SIGHT every time, Maverick has the upper hand for the first while, considering that while SAINT is COMPETENT, having been developed for combat, the fact still remains that he’s technically not a robot, but an AI whos spent a lot longer living in a computer than running around out in the world.  he eventually gets the hang of it though, and learns to see through a lot of Maverick’s feints and tricks.  they get pretty into it, SAINT has torn off one of Maverick’s (entirely mechanical and therefore fixable) arms in a rage because hes SUCH an insufferable dickhead, Maverick has trapped SAINT in a gigantic gas explosion... its kind of a miracle that the two of them make it out the other side alive every time??

it starts turning around when in the middle of one of their dumb scraps they get grabbed by some shaaaaaaadyyyyyy paramilitary group that i havent Super developed yet, but they turn out to be the Main Villains of the story so yknow theyre important.  the two of them are of interest because Maverick’s got absurdly advanced augments and implants, like “shouldnt really exist” advanced, while SAINT is a cutting-edge combat AI riding around in a unique, high-tech body.  the intention is theyll both be picked apart to be reverse-engineered, but not too long after getting caught and detained, Maverick manages to break himself out, bc being a slippery little weasel is kind of his thing

he then DELIBERATELY goes out of his way to track down SAINT and get HIM out too, in his words because “even though SAINT’s a pain in the ass, he doesn’t really deserve to be straight-up tortured”.  unfortunately he can only find SAINT’s AI, and not his body, and given that he’s got precious little time to figure out what to do, the two of them pretty much settle on getting SAINT’s AI out of the facility and then coming back later for his body.  unfortunately AGAIN they’re both idiots and think uploading a fully fledged combat AI suite to cerebral implants that are only really suited for enhancing reflexes and split-second decision making is a good, reasonable idea

long, painful story short, in the time it takes to escape and get to safety, Maverick’s brain almost practically melts from the strain, nearly killing both him AND SAINT in the process.  luckily with the help of a guy named Harlan, a genius bioengineer and Maverick’s ex they manage to get SAINT out and into a server he can live on for the interim

they do eventually get SAINT’s proper body back after a time where he has to live between a server and a shoddy temporary replacement body (which he is very angry about the entire time) but i havent Exactly figured it out since that has GOT to be very difficult and probably more than a 1.5 man job.  the two of them actually manage to have some actual normal conversations during this time but its kinda awkward and stilted.  theres a fair amount of realizing like “oh huh this dude is just A Normal Guy with like, thoughts and interests and stuff not relating at all to wanting me dead” on both sides

after this point they still butt heads fairly often but its toned WAY down; SAINT especially is kinda like “Hm.” because why on earth would this dude go so far out of his way to nearly die just to save someone who his only interactions with have been filled with vitriol and violence...? (spoiler its cuz Maverick is generally actually a pretty good and selfless guy underneath all the smugness and attitude)

eventually they start teaming up instead of constantly smacking each others’ wrists at every turn, around when the story starts really picking up and said aforementioned Shady Paramilitary Group starts becoming a proper real threat and theyre joined by a whole cast of other characters that i havent drawn yet (Harlan, as well as Leta, an AI programmer who worked on an early iteration of what eventually became SAINT, Jamie, Maverick’s older sister who’s a mechanic/pilot, Eleven, super-hacker extraordinaire, to name a few)

their progression from “kind of awkward friends” to “boyfriends, actually” isnt sth they rlly think about directly, its literally.  theyre both so goddamn STUPID it takes another character pointing out how theyve gone from “he’s fine, we work together pretty well i guess” to “id literally willingly die for this guy at the drop of a hat and also oh yeah i let him have access to some of my tech functions so we can keep better track of and support each other during operations better” for them to be like “wait oh shit oh fuck i might be in love”

THAT GOT SO GODDAMN LONG I LOVE THESE DIPSHITS SO MUCH IM CONSTANTLY BLOWING UP MY OC TWITTER W SHIT ABT THEM....IM TRULY LOST IN THE SAUCE ON THIS ONE... 

[headbangergf]

i hate that i cant even relax when i get home either. everyone else gets the luxury of relief when they get home from school and being able to sleep or play games or work on their damn homework. i dont even have that. i have to wait until like 6-7pm for my mom to get home and before that i have to clean a whole kitchen and usually the living room as well because my siblings contribute to a huge mess and dont help clean it at all. its not anyones fault and im not mad at anyone specifically for it , but im so drained every single day all i have the energy for is to just be on my phone or fall asleep. i cant help it. school drains my social battery and my mental energy. this doesnt really seem that bad either , but to be honest its getting really hard for me to just exist. so asking me to do chores and watch two kids is a lot right now. sometimes when i get home and i just cry my eyes out in the bathroom on the toilet or in the bathtub for like 10 minutes because im just so burnt out and i cant ever catch a break. but living at my dads is not an option for me tbh. i miss him sometimes and i miss my family and i miss arizona in general but im terrified he will sexually assault me. i know that im his kid and its different than my mom but i am so scared of him. but even then sometimes i find myself wishing that i could live with him because at least then i could genuinely solely focus on my studies. i dont know. ive talked to my mom once about taking a break and going there for a bit but she completely rejected the idea even though every time she gets upset with me ( usually my fault ill be honest im really lazy but its just because im so exhausted every single day ) she offers to let me stay with him. its just weird. also i was looking at how to purge ( i dont think i even have the balls to do that i was just curious so do not get on my ass about that ) and she saw it on my phone and she fucking yelled at me saying shit like “you dont even eat enough how are you going to purge” and called me selfish and shit like ok… how do you think this is going to make me not want to. im so exhausted i cant even cut myself anymore because cleaning up and all that shit is a lot of work. and i think im out of bandaids because my sister always takes them. but anyways i dont even have the energy to relapse at this point like im doing horrible. my room is a trainwreck i havent even unpacked my suitcase from when i went to visit my dad on spring break. and my mom is so rude to me about my room like bro ik my shit is fucked but if you havent noticed im literally crying every morning because i dread school so much and im just generally depressed as hell. and she continues to blame it on me for not going outside and exercising and shit which i guess is true but like idk. i thought that was a normal part of depression. not wanting to go out and stuff. the point is instead of offering support she just makes me feel like an idiot and like im just super lazy but i think its more than that. ever since me and him broke up ive just been so fucked up. like i cant deal w it right now and im not mad at him but it caught me so off guard and i was just not ready for it at all. i cannot stop binge eating and im upset bc i probably regained the 8 pounds i lost over spring break. and its 3 am so i rlly need to go the fuck to sleep but ill prob rant more later lol.

ok goodnight

heavy trigger warning ; run while u can lmao

im so fucking done i just want to kill myself. i hate school. i cant stand having to wake up so early every day and talk to people i dont like and have to do and worry about so many things. im so tired of putting my fullest effort into my classes and still getting average grades compared to what i used to get. i know that doesnt seem bad , but im literally never going to get into my dream college at this rate and its fucking disheartening. going to that college is the only thing keeping me going , keeping me from just ending it all. and the fact that someone is probably going to beat me and im not going to be in first place when i graduate makes me want to die. thats so fucking embarrassing for me. i used to be number one in and at everything and now im just merging in with everyone else. i want to be at the top. i want to be the best. i want to get the best grades and beat everyone. not for the satisfaction, just so i can finally calm the fuck down and not have to worry about it anymore. i hate seeing people above me. its so upsetting. how did i downgrade this bad? what in the actual fuck happened to me.

and on top of this the only person i truly love doesnt even talk to me anymore. doesnt even look my way in the halls. im so heartbroken over him and i cant even talk about it to ANYONE because no one fucking cares. no one cares. and no one has to , but it just hurts that everyone makes fun of me for liking him or just discards what im saying without even listening. especially when you guys make fun of him. i have to go along with that shit but it really breaks my heart cuz you all KNOW he NEVER did me wrong. and he never did yall wrong either. i dont care that none of you like him because he actually loved me. he did. i know he did. hes the first person ive ever been with that didnt make me violently cry myself to sleep. he didnt make me relapse constantly. he made me so happy , and even if he doesnt see me as a boy , at least he respected me. i dont even care about that at this point. i really dont. because he loved me and he made me feel handsome. i could show him the most masculine photo of me and he’d still compliment me in a neutral or masculine way even if i was presenting feminine. he never feminized me like the rest of you do. i didnt have to hide myself around him. i always felt comfortable with him. so fuck you guys for talking shit about him every chance you get cuz he never wronged me or any of you. i hate having to be fake cuz i dont want to be made fun of for sticking up for him. but you know why we split. he couldnt prioritize me. thats fine. even though that shit literally broke me and im STILL fucked up about it , it doesnt mean he was in the wrong. he was putting himself first and honestly i respect him for it. but i wish he would just tell me if he doesnt want me talking to him anymore. all i want is a conversation with him. i really miss him so much. i miss how i felt when i was with him. but i dont think he cares about me anymore man. i fucking ruined it because i let myself say too much. i talk too much about how i feel if you let me and im so sorry to everyone who has to deal with it. i dont know why i do that. it just feels like nobody wants to hear about how im doing anymore so idk what to do man. i cant talk to anybody without feeling guilty. bad combination of him being a good listener and me being a big talker. honestly hes probably so sick of me. that thought makes tears form so fast in my eyes but i just have to accept it i guess. i wish i was normal. if i was just a normal girl and not a demented fucking tranny he would probably like me. im probably not even ftm im just insanely stupid. maybe i just got sick of being a girl idk. either way , thats not an invite to refer to me as a girl so fucking dont if anyone is reading this. probably no one. lol. anyways. im abt to rb this and continue cuz i was typing and then i reached the limit so part two incoming i guess lmao.

[actualbird]

It's totally cool if you don't!!! I get it!! However. Do you maybe have any tips on for when school is hell, I'm only asking because it seems to be hell for you a lot so maybe you have coping mechanisms (also wikihows Don't F-ing Work), but it's cool if you don't have advice! Just keep existing and being the messy and wonderful bird we all love.

hiya anon!!! and well this ask came at a great time since im starting the next semester next week, so maybe some of the stuff i do to stay alive might work for others too

schedule nap time: THIS IS NOT A JOKE IM SERIOUS. if you have a free period in between classes or even a class where you can afford to nap and nobody gives a shit, do it. and if you can, make it a regular thing. im the kind of person who needs that extra boost of energy during the day, so i put aside like 30 minutes per day to just pass out in the library. it’s rather rejuvenating. like, u might look a little bit like a mess after, but. worth it

planner/schedules/reminders: im not the type for planners because handwriting stuff is not my jam, but For The Love Of God have some sort of record for what you have to get done. this does wonders for my anxiety especially during hell week because i can see clearly whats going to kill me and plan accordingly. also, making checklists and schedules is…honestly very relaxing. for class schedules i use this app called ClassUp. it’s simple and cute and u can customize it a bunch. my checklist thing is also rlly great. it’s a chrome extension called Todoist. super straightforward with like cool stuff for deadlines and priorities AND you can hook it up to your email to send you reminders for when youre overdue on something. Todoist sends me so many emails…if you do like handwriting, maybe bullet journal? a lot of people find that fun. just try and find the type of organization that not only works for you but brings you some semblance of joy, no matter how small. god i hope im making sense.

Worry Time ™: this is something jenny @listentotheshityousay told me literally yesterday. if youre the type to get a lot of anxiety, “set aside 10~15 min every day (or maybe two short sessions per day if that works better) where u do nothing but worry.” i havent tried this yet but the logic is sound. like you exhaust your worrying in that session, and having a Time for worrying makes there also be a time for Not Worrying. it’ll help get rid of that constant feeling of dread and instead you have a concentrated but short and finite moment of dread. you cant get rid of worry, but you can sure make it more efficient. if you catch yourself worrying about something, make a note of it and worry about it in the next session. as jenny so wonderfully put it, “procrastinate on worrying.” it’ll free up a lot of time that can be used for actual work.

things thatll calm you down when youre freaking the fuck out: what it says on the tin. i dunno about you but school is panic attack heaven esp when workload gets Heavy. i figured pretty fast what the warning signs were and helped myself make that shit easier. i have a bunch of videos and songs saved in my phone that calm me down. this cute keychain i squeeze like a stressball.  origami paper (folding cranes is, ive discovered, a very effective way of calming down). just like tiny stuff you can bring with you just in case things get bad. they wont magically make things better, but at least it wont be like youre dying. 

rewards: positive reinforcement does fuckin wonders. in the hellscape of school sometimes it gets hard to feel happy about anything, so you have to take the hammer and find a way to make yourself feel happy. if you ace a test, Treat Yo Self. and this doesnt just apply to “big” achievements. i buy myself candy when i recite without stumbling over my words. tiny rewards or big rewards. i like to think it makes life feel like a game, which makes school just that tiniest bit more bearable.

just something to look forward to: i have this thing called fancy friday where on fridays i put a little bit more effort into my outfit so that i look Fly As Fuck. it makes me feel good the entire day and motivates me to get to the end of the week. i could be sobbing on wednesday but in the back of my head i’d think “at least on friday i’ll wear that cute skirt” and so i push on through. give yourself something fun to be excited about. school can be as much of a dick as it wants, but it cant take away the joy you have for something you crafted yourself. 

go easy on urself: not a coping thing but just a general reminder that while school is important, dont let yourself get too caught up in grades or work or achievement or failure. youre not a machine and youre doing your best. i think thats pretty cool

i hope school doesnt get too hellish anon!!!!

[boof-kun]

Do those... asks...

@bicep-naruto​ thank ;)

(1)Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

closed

(2) Do You Have Freckles?

nop

(3) Can You Whistle?

i used to be able to but now i cant :/

(4) Last Song You Listened To.

stan the beatsmith - heaven or hell

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour?

purple but i also v like black, blue, turquoise/teal, and pastel colors

(6) Relationship Status.

songle

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now?

48 degrees fahrenheit

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky?

i woke up tired but i wasnt  cranky

(9) How Many Followers?

332

(10) Zodiac Sign.

capricorn

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour?

brown

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily?

no but i do take a couple different medicines

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower?

no

(14) What Books Are You Reading?

rule of the bone by russell banks

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

this is a random book from a drawer (i havent even read the book i dont know why it was in there) “...and snarling about everything. Four smokers were...”

(16) Favourite Anime?

hhhHHHHH I HAve ToO MANY (death note is one of my favorites for sure though)

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

i think my dad?

(18) Do You Collect Anything?

i like putting stickers on my door (and i have a bunch of sheets of stickers in a drawer) if that counts as collecting something

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch?

i literally cannot remember

(20) Do You Dance In The Car?

no

(21) Favourite Animal?

cats are good friends. i also like penguins and dogs.

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics?

no

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

sometimes eight but usually around one

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

no

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

pool

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog?

yours ;)

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

water from the fridge thingy

(28) What Makes You Happy?

you, video games, my cat, remembering rlly weird dreams

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

mmmmmmm its about the same but its harder to focus if the music has words

(31) Dogs Or Cats?

i love both but cats are more chill

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

the one no one uses

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox.

i have a playstation but for all i know xbox could be better

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

ocean. lakes are scary

(35) Do You Believe In Magic?

black magic (bc religion)

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

green

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue?

no

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

i save money until i find something that i want to buy

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

the blanket underneath me has some pink on it, theres a few random items with pink, some pink gel pens+markers+paints, and some pink on the stickers on my door and on the drawings from when i was little

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

yakuza 0

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

like once or twice in third grade. one also landed on my thumb in my backyard.

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

not unless their thinking is convincing

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams?

yell heah

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

not really bc theyre boring

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

im not sure ive cried of a movie tbh

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

sunflower seeds

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

id probably sell the ticket tbh

(48) Are You A Picky Eater?

slightly picky

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

no

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning?

no i like thunder/lightening the sky goes pew pew

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write?

i like both even though i literally never write 

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud?

yeah but i get a headache after a while if im wearing headphones and its loud

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

carve pumpkins

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

i dont have an actual playlist. i just like videos (mostly music) on youtube and choose what i want to listen to (i dont unlike any of the songs i dont listen anymore just because i want to look back at what i used to like ten years from now). anyway ill just close my eyes and choose something random bc if i shuffle it i wont know where anything is:

lights - klaypex

^^ i used to listen to that v often in fourth grade (i still like it tho)

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

fall

(56) What Are You Craving Right Now?

love and affection

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

(58) What Is Your Gender?

female

(59) Coffee Or Tea?

tea even though i dont drink either

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

i have a project for ceramics about 3d art from an ancient civilization, a specific artist, or from a movement

(61) What Is Your Sexuality?

aroace

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

ive been sleeping on the floor for the past few months so no

(63) Favourite Pokemon?

i dont have a favorite but when i was younger i used to watch pokemon all the time and i remember i loved piplup

(64) Favourite Social Media?

tumble dot come

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

i dont have much of an opinion on them

(66) Do You Get Homesick?

sometimes 

(67) Are You A Virgin?

yeah

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

pantene conditioner and dove shampoo i think? i usually get something random

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

id probably sleep in my car bc im afraid of motels especially crappy ones. i always feel like someones watching me in motels/hotels + since its a motel it might be nasty and im not taking that risk

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

ye

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

i dont watch movies

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex?

dont have one

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

all of the 34 sad quotes i showed you :))

(74) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest?

i like all of them. i dont find any of them “””“sexy””””” though

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

GOD i was obsessed with swinging when i was younger... like my best friend and i in preschool were known for being inseparable and for always going really high on the swings. and ye, i still get excited when i see a swing set

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

i dont remember what i did five minutes ago let alone what the last thing i ate was

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

neko atsume and thats it

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

no bc i dont know how to do cpr. if i did then sure bc itd be the right thing to do probably

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

yEALL HEAH

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

also: YEALL HEAHHE

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People?

mmmm typically no

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

no

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

its open but barely bc i dont want the light to come in

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today?

ate, saw you ;), and nearly poke myself in the eye

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed?

sweatpants and a tshirt

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

UUUU soap

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person?

night

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

wii u - botw, twighlight princess, hyrule warriors

ps4 - persona 5, fallout 4, neir automata, ffxv, yakuza 0, and two other final fantasy games

3ds + dsi that doesnt work anymore - animal crossing, ace attorney the trilogy, super smash bros, pokemon x, devil survivor 2, a mario game that avarey gave me, cooking mama 2, this zoo game that i lost, gardening mama, and maybe one more?

phone - neko atsume

((im planning on selling a few games))

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

i can tell you irl bc theres a lot and its be more confusing if i wrote it out ;))))

(90) Favourite Soda Drink?

coke

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite?

f u n k y sounds + i heard some asmr of a person cutting chalk, soap, wood, etc. and that sounded nice

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

jeans when im going out, sweatpants at home (so probably sweats more)

(93) How Do You Look Right Now?

ungly

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You.

laying down and pretending im dead

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want?

maybe one of a constellation? or of a symbol from a video game or something i rlly like and means a lot to me

(96) Favourite YouTuber?

mmmm dan and phil are p entertaining and so is jenna marbles

[kkukkung]

idk if you've watched mxray yet but like (spoiler alert) i'm shocked at how fast minhyuk figured out who the mafia is like... the game had -just- started and he slid up to the camera immediately and started naming names. what kind of alien sorcery?? truly the most perceptive mx member

yes! minhyuk is rly sharp like his brain works v quickly!! he notices minute details abt people + the mood and responds to things super efficiently! like if someone isn’t saying much (read: shownu mostly lol) he guides them into the action and maintains a good atmosphere... and he’s good at noticing when someone is feeling down + naturally comforts them without being too imposing? :’> 💖💖 one of my favourite things abt him

more late replies under cut!

ordered oldest to newest... 

there are so many i’m sorry omg... this is literally 4k words... first of all i’m rly sorry i’m so bad with replies ;___; i’m going to... do_better.mp3 once i’ve caught up. questions from today will b in a separate compiled ask thing. thank you for being patient w me (i’m saying this like u have a choice jhsfgskdj rip) and i’m very sorry that lots of these referred to something that has now become irrelevant. i’ll work harder 💖

(svzannebrown(.)tumblr(.)com/post/154440030608/all-that-anyone-needs-to-know-about-my-time-in) i found shownu's origin story

(link) aaaa this video jkgfhkj it’s rly so cute ;___; ur right it’s him

shownu had his foot on mh's d and changkyun played shownu's ass like a drum...what a time to be alive

truly. i love shownu initiating anything btw like, bc altho he tolerates anything the others do to him he rarely does anything back to them?? so seeing him being playful is rly fascinating.

wHYD YOU GOTTA TAG THAT AS "b*k**k*" I CANT SEE IT ANY OTHER WAY NOW 😭😭😭🔫🔫

this was... in reference to the water gun scene in ep 1 of mxray jskdfhg im sry... hyungwon spitting it back out like a fountain tho... please... a real Freaq

I'm scream I was looking thru the tags of the gifset of mx sleeping and someone tagged "showhyuk are wearing masks cuz they're the ones who sleep with their eyes open" DKRKKFKG I forgot about that Please Release The Terrifying Eyes

kjsghdfgkjskjfd imagine them sleeping without their masks with their eyes open facing each other just................ staring... i feel like mh would look especially Terrifying

Ok but think abt this: Jackson and Wonho pans*xual m8s who support each other on the low. Yes.

yes i love it. also gym workout partners. small calves big thigh centaur buddies. sweetheart squad.

does kihyun KNOW, like, does he ///know///

i think... i think he Knows,

someone should sign jeonghan and minhyuk up for celeb bromance so they can go on that flower picking date minhyuk wanted

FLOWER PICKING that’s so cute... minhan in a flower meadow holding baskets of flowers and putting daisy chains on each other’s heads.... .... n then it gets dark and the flowers start whispering “stay with us forever” bc they are jealous of how pretty the flowerboys are... giant venus flytraps emerge and minhyuk sacrifices jeonghan and escapes sfhkgfkj but he forgets abt the daisy chain jeonghan put on his head earlier and it morphs into a stinking corpse lily which eats him :/ im sry i can’t just... leave scenarios cute wtf

Kihyun carrying Mingyu on his back(again)... Taking him to where monbebes are and making him greet them... Doesn't this remind you of something... Anyways I love true love and friendship:)

oo anon im not sure what this is meant to remind me of??jssjdkgh i’m not that familiar w svt :( most of what i know abt them comes from their interactions w other groups... but yes i think seventeen with mx is the cutest thing they seem so so close??

"is it just me or is the entire world infatuated with jeonghan" OMG girl SS SsSSAME he's my bias in seventeen (my ult... the bias that got me into kpop) and as I got to know him he rlly is like that?? He's got this easygoing and likable personality that isn't overwhelming for introverts/quieter people but more outgoing ppl flock to him too bc he's still inquisitive and engaging to interact with \ahh sorry i rlly had to go off abt my fave I love him

this is so cute tbh i thought jeonghan was lowkey evil sdhfjgkj like he looks angelic but he’s.............  and the reason why minhyuk likes him is bc... they’re both pretty boys who r actuall.y.... Evil lmao. im kidding im kidding ofc from what i know of jeonghan he’s like u describe him to be but also Very Libra...lmao.....👀👀👀👀 i rly like his vibe idk he’s kind of ??? healing ?? and i rly love minhan a lot :0

i found ur sweater paws tag for the first time today and ive never been happier in m entire life thank u..........

jsfdhg you’re welcome!! there’s not a lot on that tag but i’m glad u enjoyed ur time there! it’s mostly hyungwon who has them bc he loves sleeves that that too long for his already long arms?? minhyuk likes them when he feels like being c*te and wonho uses them to look s*ft... i could analyse this

I swear that Minhyuk can potentially dominate the world...I mean you've seen how he's got everyone wrapped around his little finger, especially Shownu (Showhyuk could become kings of the world and I wouldn't mind tbh), and you think he's just an innocent pretty boy at first? JOKES! That boy is coming for you. He's coming for all of us.

hands up if u’ve been personally SCAMMED by minhyuk... anyway yes i feel like every member of mx loves lmh a lot and appreciate him lots?? especially how much he’s improved since debut and what he does for the atmosphere + entire vibe of mx!

(wh airport photo anon) I havent seen it but my friend told me about it one time casually like "rmbr that photo of wonho at the airport?" and im like ''???'' so they said wonho was adjusting his pants and the waistband went too far down or something like that and you could see a happy trail? like a lot apparently and idk i felt creepy to be like "show me" so i lost my opportunity to see it and havent found it since :/ its gonna haunt me for the rest of my life

i rly think i would’ve... just shamelessly said “show me” lmao especially when they already described it in that much detail 👀👀👀👀hmmmmm jgfkhds but im glad ur dignity is intact anon! if anyone does know... what this photo is..... 👀 slide into my inbox.... idk whenever i see his stomach/abs it’s all very Clean u kno he shaves for performances where he has to show his body... he looks like a hotdog..... clean and slippery and often oiled up w a sheen

i once made the mistake of assuming that short, pink-haired boys with stubby fingers and fat feet and cheek dimples were harmless, only to find out that they're actually a 93 liner whose chin will stab you and they must always win in any scenario. i now regret just about everything

FAT FEET. rly why does kihyun think his chin is a weapon like he’s always holding it at that exact angle if u kno what i mean w a small smirk on his lips... knife cat meme.... nd jdkfghskj ik he rly can’t stand losing/being wronged

I dreamed Seungcheol 'owned' a Burguer King and Jeonghan and Minhyuk spent there the night and ended up getting together and the next morning everyone was like??? What happened to u two??? And they were like love happened:))) I HA T E MYSELF SO MUVH

hfkjfsadjkdsfhdfgdkjkfhdksdhfsdjkhf WHY DID THEY FRICKLE IN A BURGER KING OF ALL PLACESbnjkd

Great skater Wonho tags. A+

Bruh that fic idea in your XKOMBAT Wonho picture is amazing. I wish I was good at writing, especially for that concept...

PLEASE jkfdgkh it was rly just an early morning brain fart but thank u sm... i used to write ficlet tags all the time but recently i’ve been too busy to tag much. and anon2 u should give it a shot! like writing is something u get better @ with time (like... most things lmao idk what im trying to say) but rly we need more writers in this fandom and don’t let self doubt get in the way of what u want to do! i’d be happy to read people’s fics if they want me to btw :>

Case example 374926395 of YKH must always win: changkyun jokingly throwing a tiny snowball at his back and kihyun retaliating by slamming a giantass handful of snow on top of changkyun's head. When will the war ever end?

I KNOW !!!!!!! it’s such an expected reaction from kihyun tho idk why they keep provoking him!!! it’s mostly ck wh + mh like tbh, there must be something..... masochistic in this they enjoy it somehow jfshgd... kihyun has to have the last laugh he has to Win lmao

You're so cute

this is Fake im Fake ur Fake but u kno what’s 100% real? my love and gratitude for u ily thank u hfgdj

Never stop doing the Wonho and Shakespeare thing! :o

thank u omg i probably couldn’t stop if i wanted to?? im very attracted to Raw Feelings and wonho & shakespeare both do that.... especially well...

it's rly hard to find wonho fansites that don't bleach him :/// like he's already so pale they don't... need to... like i know why they do it (not that i condone it) but srsly wonho is already super pale it's not like we don't know he's pale LOL. i remember round wh used to have good unbleached photos but there was one point a few months ago where they put this awful filter on their wonho photos it didn't just make him pale but it made his skin??? blue silver?? it was disappointing

the tragedy of round_wh jgkhsdgj i know :(((( and rose petal jam too :((( playboi_wh has some mostly untouched/unedited photos i rly like!

do u ever wish for that cute lil heart choker to make a comeback i miss wonho with it :-/

he hasn’t worn chokers for a while i’m stressed!!!! the pink heart choker was Iconic but idk why no1 ever talks abt THIS masterpiece

 truly innovative, redefined the gothfurry subculture.

am I the only one who realized that wonho is the one who solved all the escape rooms first on the first ep of xray... Ngl... Not to brag but honestly I have the most talented bias in the world..

wonho on shows is rly interesting bc he’s either completely and utterly useless (i.e...... what was that bouncy ball mess in ep4, also on weekly idol when he was... a mess) OR the golden hyung/saviour like there’s rly no in between?? he’s still trying to decide whether or not to present himself as a dumbass or not pls save him :/ dshfjkg im kidding i think it’s more like... he’s good at a certain sort of physical activity that involves concentrating on one simple thing (ddr --> getting the moves right, thigh-wrestling --> using thigh strength...) but not good at performing under pressure (tkd demonstration, bouncy ball racing against a senior idol)... re puzzles i think it’s not so much that he’s good at the puzzles themselves (mh + ck are better at that) but, he’s good at understanding the motivations and feelings of other people/predicting the path that a variety show would go; so that’s kind of how he got the password without finding all the hints, bc he knew it would be something meaningful like their debut date. idk that’s what i think!! like, wonho is smart but more emotionally/people-smart than smart in the traditional sense imo?? hope this makes sense omg

I don't know if you know about this, but does starship allow people to send in gifts for theonsta X members? Like do they have guidelines you have to follow cause I saw they moved buildings and I've always wanted to send in gifts cause I know Monsta x will never have a concert where I live.

hey im sry this is so late but the general guidelines for presents is pretty much common sense i think (no food, no weird used things, etc., and some companies don’t allow gifts that are too expensive).... i know starship allows gifts but i’m not too sure abt the specifics?? i’ve heard of people sending in things like clothing and books and framed fanart and whatnot but yeah... if anyone knows/has experience sending presents, please help this anon! :>

I love when u use the word Floof I've incorporated it into my vocabulary now ���💕

i love the word floof!! also floofy and floofball and floomf gjdkfh ur so cute i’m glad u’ve absorbed it into ur lexicon! 💕💕💕💕💕

there's kind of a rush from starship to make mx big before they start enlisting i think :( it's kind of sad to think about. that's probably why they've been working nonstop since all in. i think starship expected them to make it big from debut (thus the rush to get a first win and taking their phones away) and mx was promised that but things didn't go as planned. at least that's the feeling i'm getting. i think the success of part 2.5 will determine if they're going to stay in japan or korea

i feel like... enlistment is still so far away for them?? usually groups have a 7-ish year run anyway n like............ not to talk abt d*sbandment but i think mx rly have to gain more musical autonomy if they want to stay in the industry for a long time, and adapt to the changing entertainment landscape like big bang does? i agree tho that starship expected mx to be a lot bigger initially but tbh... i have so much beef w the timing, planning, management team like................ i rly truly feel like if they promoted hero instead of rush a first win would’ve been far more likely... not to mention all of their comebacks + even their debut?? have clashed w other Big Name Groups’ promotion times and they’re always so infuriatingly close but :/ aaaa... also idk they need more ?? flamboyance ?? they put on the best stages and work themselves to death but i feel like sometimes the choreography itself, although v nice in their practice room filmed w a non-moving camera from the front, doesn’t carry over to the stage/live performances as well? and w their title tracks too idk i sometimes feel like starship is forever a little behind with the musical trend of the time... mx has never released a bad song but lmao, to be honest i feel like their title tracks have never been flashy enough? :/ their concept team is doing well tho i think the x clan aesthetic is a+ and it was the all in/stuck/fighter vibes+visuals that drew in a lot of new fans, myself included. idk sometimes i just feel like......... starship isn’t bringing out their full potential nd it makes me >:(((.......... ANYWAYS i have high hopes for the upcoming comeback pls pls pls support them

Ok but,,,he ain't even ugly in em tho, how does he still look a model even when he tryna look like spongebob

regarding this post lmao. not to be blinded by love also but ur right he’s never looked bad in his entire life :/

Mx members broken down: just a stuffed bear?? How'd that get there?, spongebob, Wallace and gromit, shifty cat, Kermit the frog, zico????, and an alien dressed as a human trying to blend into society

jkfdghkj enough!!!!! not to b serious on a cute funny ask but it must be :/ being compared to an established idol rapper all the time and whenever i think abt all the shit jooheon must’ve gone through during their debut year as the Representative Monsta X Member and all the pressure he was under after being so hyped up after no mercy.... i :( feelsbadman... 

Minhyuks secret was prolly everyone's **** size....tbh...

in response to >this

girl ngl you have some of the most nastie tags ive seen on this website sometimes but they always make me laugh, thanks for being so rad

PLEASE I FEEL LIKe... my tags aren’t even that nasty but mb i follow a different set of people and we’re used to different things lmao sjhghj i swear i’m pretty tame?? thank u for enjoying them tho ily darling 🌻🌻🌻

"he's my own flesh and blood. my cells quiver when he sneezes" - anniesus on im changkyun, 1:17, monbebe bible

SJDHFPLEASE but like... rly.... no printers only fax

i totally agree srsly i don't get how ppl don't see how scripted survival shows in general are lol... ppl felt rly bad for ck and i TOTALLY GET IT but like sometimes ppl go as far as saying the contestants b*llied him or like, genuinely hated him... and it doesn't sit well with me...i tried explaining this once but someone was like "but he looked so sad in no mercy i can just tell bc if his expressions " he might have felt awkward and he's introverted but i rly don't think he was mistreated

YESYES^^^^^^^^^^^^ idk some people rly.... think no mercy was..... a reliable portrait of reality jkfhdsg. when ppl take it too far and say the others rly mistreated him or hated him it makes my eyes roll back into my skull idk like !!! do u rly think!!! no mercy was one big scripted story with convenient narrative arcs and changkyun’s ate arrival was one of them. i think at that point it was obvious changkyun was going to debut?? and how do u make an audience like someone in the shortest amount of time possible? u make them sympathise with him/his situation. no mercy was very organised storytelling, if u know what i mean, it is a very narrative-driven show with victims and villains and timed hurdles and it concludes in a very neat way.

Ur tags about minhyuk being dramatic on no mercy dkfkfjkgk I love him my bad actor baby.....rmr in the same ep changkyun came on I think where hyungwon and gun played a prank on a younger guy where they were "fighting" and minhyuk kept laughing thru it ddkjfjf idk if that was his #Concept like was he supposed to be awkward laughing. Idek but um I'm love his dumbass

he’s AWFUL at acting jskhdfg but yoonho, dear pure boy i love with my whole heart, rly fell for it regardless bc he just wanted everyone to get along hjfdjkdf :( ur right lmao lmh rly found it funny i doubt it was a Concept i think he’s genuinely just................... bad at acting jksdfgh

THANK YOU for pointing out how obviously scripted no mercy was; like honestly any reality show from any country is overproduced and you have to take everything with a grain of salt. But here's the real question (and you don't have to answer if you don't feel comfortable): did starship already have the final lineup planned? Personally I think that some were gonna make it regardless (jooheon, shownu, kihyun) and that the others weren't finalized until later, but idk man it's still a big debate

i agree!! but i’d definitely add changkyun to the planned debut lineup. i think starship wanted to debut yoonho originally but they realised too late that he wasn’t ready yet. also, it’s interesting what they did w #gun bc they rly made u like him as a person, rly sympathise w him, rly anticipate him when it was kind of clear in a hip hop group there would b a high tone rapper and a low tone rapper... and jooheon was definitely going to debut like 100% lmao so the high tone slot was taken from the beginning. i think starship had plans for #gun already at that point but he wasn’t gonna make it into mx. and i think wonho was also most likely in the lineup, but it wasn’t decided at the beginning of the show like it was with the other three u mentioned.. probably somewhere along the line. i think Perhaps hyungwon n minhyuk were in the dark.

this isn't prompted by anything but you: makes/reblogs a post me: 💝💝💝💖💖💖💗💗💗💓💓💞💞💕💕💕💕💖💖💘💘💘💘💘 you: writes tags me: 💖💖💖💖💘💘💝💝💘💘💞💕💕💖💓💓💓💗💗💖💕💘💗💗💘💘💕💖💗💗💘💘💕💖💖💖💓💖💘💕💘💗💘💘💘💗💘💞💘 i love u and ur blog so much ur so funny and smart??? u always have valuable things to say??? amazing ..

this is 2 much i rly looked at this msg for like 3 days straight pleasthe............ im... very flattered jkshg but i’m rly just ur casual mess,.., thank u sm for enjoying my humble blob :( i hope ur having the best day rly honestly & truly i appreciate this sm jhfdgjghj idk how to respond adequately!!!! 💖💖💖💖💘💘💝💝💘💘💞💕💕💖💓💓💓💗💗💖💕💘💗💝💗💘💘💕💖💗💗💘💘💕💖💖💖💓💖💘💕💘💗💘💘💘💗💘💞💘💝💝💝💖💖💖💗💗💗💓💓💞💞💕💕💕💕💖💖💘💘💘💘💘!!!!!

I had a mini freakout too, we got scammed so hard. the old selca before and the dark undercut now. he said a few months ago that he's going to dye his hair black for the next comeback though ;; don't lose hope mbb

(regarding wonho not having black hair and being Scammed Again jkdghsjk) i rly do hope he goes darker bc it must suck bleaching and dyeing all the time :/ he looks good w every colour tho so i won’t complain regardless of what happens 💖

ummmm did u ever watch the wonho hand reading vid ?????? (the audio ,,, i couldnt hear shit,,,) i watched minhyuks and i was like wow a certified demon agdjdkjsh joking but everything he said had me liek yeth its trUE!!!!

the best part of the wonho one was when he said “he’s got love in his heart, but he doesn’t quite know what it is” and “when this photo was taken he was probably feeling sorry or sad for himself or something” sdfhgkjdfgs AND WHEN HE SUGGESTED WONHO SHOULD STUDY METAPHYSICS i rly scremed.... also he has the will to go for what he wants + he’s sensitive !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tru!!! ALSO IM SCREAMING I KNOW minhyuk’s was SO ACCURATE kjfdshkjgsdf “THE LINE OF HEART IS SOMEWHAT DISTURBED” jkfhsgkjhdfsg  DEMON

I'm unsure if you are into block b or not, but I thought I should tell you just in case that P. O's mother passed away on the 27the due to chronic illness

aa i’m not rly into block b but this is super sad :( i feel awful for answering this so late but my thoughts are with him and his family 💞 

Kamsaminda!!! I literally face palmed so hard! Kboo logic is something else

it’s just.............. very ironic that they claimed their english was getting worse bc they’re so immersed in the ~Korean Way~ but... “kamsaminda”......... 

Ur tags are what I live for omg 😂 

thank you darling 💝💝 i feel a bit :/ recently bc i haven’t been as active as i’d like to on this blog but i’m catching up and i’m... gonna work harder jshfdg tysm!

*hugs you real tight* would you please send this to the first 10 people in your dash (or whoever)? Make sure someone gets a hug today and stay safe! (づ◕‿◕)づ

aaaa thank you!!! i’m sending it back w my heart wrapped in a ribbon 💝 ty for this and i hope you’re also well-hugged and safe!

Annie I just wanted to say I appreciate u for being such a lovely and funny and kind person u get so many q's (bc ur so lovely and fun to talk to) and I'm obviously only adding onto ur backlog of messages sorry dkfkjgg but yeth u always give thoughtful or funny responses and ur Bloggie is just always so refreshing and fun to read I like to go thru ur posts when I've had a tiring day and just read ur funny tags and replies so ty for that :') 💕

sdhfjkgs i don’t deserve all u nice anons :((( thank you for enjoying my blobspace i’m going to work harder to become this ????? ? lovely funny kind person i’ve tricked u into thinking i am??? rly this means a lot to me i love u !!!!!! like tbh i don’t get That Many messages i think i just... let them pile up and it’s my own fault so don’t worry abt the backlog!!! anyway i appreciate this sm and rly... it’s... ridic that there are people out there like u... really sweet people who send other people nice messages anonymously w no real purpose but to make them happy like ?????? ppl like u go straight to heaven.. ily ily i hope you’re doing well today angel!!! 🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻

[suteshiro]

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

Open, kinda? My closet is built into a wall and one of the sides has like, shelves I use often so it’s just open for accesibility

(2) Do You Have Freckles?

Nope! I got nerfed, honestly. I’d look lovely with freckles

(3) Can You Whistle?

Hahaha nope,

(4) Last Song You Listened To.

Night of Fire bc im listening to an eurobeat mix while working on a school assignment skjfvnskjfv last song I Willingly listened to is The Hearse by matt maeson which fucking slaps

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour?

Probably purple!

(6) Relationship Status.

Single

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now?

18 celsius/64 fahrenheit. pretty average but for some reason im cold

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky?

Nope! I woke up feeling wonderfully actually

(9) How Many Followers?

404. Very nice number

(10) Zodiac Sign.

I’m a scorpio and a dragon :3

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour?

Brown!

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily?

I do not, though I used to and might start again, who’s to say

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower?

Not rlly. I shower listening to music and I have a lot of trouble singing along to things im hearing for some reason skfnvskfjb

(14) What Books Are You Reading?

I’m too embarrassed to say publicly which one im reading now skjvnskfjb i kinda wanna read some cute cheesy romance in the nearby future

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

I grabbed the first lotr book and gottt

“Ah,” said Ted, “ you hear them, if you listen. But if I wanted to listen to old lady tales and childish legends, I’d stay home”

(Translated a bit roughly bc my physical books are mostly in spanish

(16) Favourite Anime?

You cant ask me thatt skjfvnklabmksfjb It might be Violet Evergarden? It’s the only anime that’s really made me cry

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

I think I cried in front of my mom at some point recently while pretending i wasnt crying

(18) Do You Collect Anything?

Notebooks skfnskfsnb I just think they’re neat

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch?

havent Lunched yet, dont scold me

(20) Do You Dance In The Car?

I’m rarely in cars and they’re usually not mine

(21) Favourite Animal?

Coatimundis pretty...... and adorable

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics?

Nope

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

I try to go to bed a bit before midnight but im needy and like talking to my friends so its usually around 2am

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

Nope! I p much never do that

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

Both have their pros! I think I tend towards pools bc as a rule they dont rlly have like, annoying consequences

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog?

@yournewapartment​​ keeps popping up in my dash with good advice and nice stuff and i appreciate it

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

Bottled waterr the tap water in my building is weird and doesnt seem very safe to drink and by now i hate the taste skjvfnkjn

(28) What Makes You Happy?

My friends, comedy shows, reading good fanfiction, writing fanfiction, drawing my characters, reading about others’ characters, giving gifts, the smell of roses, fairy pokemon, butterflies-

I like being happy

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

Im not really a Keeps Gifs That Convey Emotions kinda guy

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

Depends a lot skjvfnskfjvn my brain keeps switching

(31) Dogs Or Cats?

Very hard questions,,, I think I tend towards dogs bc they’re like me. Big. Excitable. Needy.

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

Purble.,......

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox.

PlayStation

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

I have been in the ocean before and idk how much i liked it but sure id do it again. A lake sounds fun!!

(35) Do You Believe In Magic?

I practice it!

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

Red

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue?

I’m not sure what exactly this is asking

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

I like saving money skjfnvksjv I rarely think of things to spend it on

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

Ye! There’s a bag I use to keep my chargers in it when im outside. it has flower pictures. very pretty

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

Love Live,,,,, and now my character Curiosity bc @zuramaru​​ is an angel and running a campaign he’s in and we played yesterday and holy shit theres a lot going on

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

Oh yes!! this one time I was in a place absolutely full of butterflies and I caught one between my cupped hands and it stayed there when I opened them and it was a wonderful experience

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

Ya,, I do the fawning thing so I tend to agree with other people by default, lest we have any kind of conflict

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams?

Oh yes, most of the dreams I remember are. bizarre

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

Yeah!!! Only done it twice but it was a blast

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

Inside Out fucking got to me

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

Peanuts,,, I don’t like sunflower seeds. I mean they’re tasty but. Too much effort for too little reward

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

Uuuuh, FOB probably

(48) Are You A Picky Eater?

Not really, but also yes? I have a few things I absolutely refuse to put in my mouth

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

Perhaps? I’m not very hard to wake up but I can sleep through a lot of stuff

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning?

Nah I fucking love it

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write?

Yes!! I think I would actually like to become a writer. Not sure tho

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud?

Yea but only when I’m really into it. Like, usually I’m listening to stuff and the volume tends to low but then there’s this One song and I turn it up all the way until it’s over

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

Wrap presents, I’ve never carved pumpkins before skjfvnskjfv seems like a hassle and I’d feel bad for not making it look nice

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

Haven’t you noticed (I’m a star) from Steven Universe

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

Winterr

(56)What Are You Craving Right Now?

Choclet........

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

Here you go!

(58) What Is Your Gender?

Solarian!

(59) Coffee Or Tea?

I’m a tea guy!

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

I’m helping translate an entire thing about the way emails work, its a bit of a hassle skjfvnsf

(61) What Is Your Sexuality?

Uuuuh I’ve been questioning but im mlm and also into nb people

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

Yeah! Makes me feel accomplished and sexy

(63) Favourite Pokemon?

SYLVEON SYLVEON SYLVEON

(64) Favourite Social Media?

Absolutely Tumblr. Unless you count Discord as a social media

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

I don’t use. Instagram. But sure they’re neat

(66) Do You Get Homesick?

A little. Usually when I travel I’m either at a place I hate or at a place where I don’t have commodities I do have at home skjfnskjfb so I miss my room

(67) Are You A Virgin?

Yup

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

Uuuh I’m using a Head & Shoulders shampoo I believe? WIth no conditioner bc my hair is real short now and conditioner tends to feel weird

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

Well you see I would choose the crappy motel but 60 bucks seems a bit unattainable so sure, let’s stay in my car

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

Nope, father is Dead

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

I’m not interested in anything, honestly

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

“If I could make days last forever, if words could make wishes come true, I’d save every day like a treasure and then, again, I would spend them with you”

(74) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest?

There’s this like. Really nice honey color

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

I loved swinging! I still do but I’m. Self conscious about my weight and scared of breaking something

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

Some pastries for breakfast

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

20B wives, My sweet angel is a real angel, BitLife, Buriedbornes, Cardinal Quest 2, Crazy 8, Egg Inc, FarmVille 2, Fire Emblem Heroes, Gardenscapes, Get bigger! Mola, Homescapes, Human Resource Machine, Kept Man Life, Love Live, Mermaid Evolution, My Little Star VIP, Piano Tiles 2, Plague Inc, Pocket City, Pokémon GO, Puzzledom, SmithStory, Soul Knight, Tap Knight, Tower Breaker

To be clear quite a few of these stay there completely untouched

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

What kind of question is this???

I mean I don’t know CPR but if I could yeah???

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

… listen,

right now ive only been on my computer for like an hour or two but yeah ive done that,

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

I don’t think so?

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People?

Yyyyes and no. I’m a bit awkward but I like people

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

Oh!! I wear this really pretty crown shaped ring but idk where I left it

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

Closed closed closed I haaate when my bedroom door is open

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today?

Talk with friends, make some tea, read? I haven’t done a lot today skvnskjvn

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed?

Comfy shirt and sweatpants

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

What’s a beauty?

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person?

uuuh both? hard to answer??

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

Well, we’ve already clarified what I have on my phone skjfnskjfb

THe only games I know I have on console are Mortal Kombat Armageddon, Devil May Cry 3 special edition, and Okami. Oh! And God of War. I think at least the first and second. Were there more than two?

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

Nah

(90) Favourite Soda Drink?

I don’t like fizzy drinks, they make my throat hurt

But Fanta is nice

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite?

Melodic voices singing, the rain, absentminded humming, small clicking noises...

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

Jeans! I have very few but I’ve grown fond of them. Used to wear yoga pants pretty exclusively before

(93) How Do You Look Right Now?

Gorgeous, of course

Skjvnskfjvn I’m still wearing the clothes I used to sleep

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You.

Ghibli movies

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want?

A star map on my back!

(96) Favourite YouTuber?

Right now I think that’s John Wolfe. But I like quite a few