#but i also don't feel able to ask them to tag their stuff so instead i just try to tag mine and that does actually help

[gallows-into-oblivion]

i think my autism may have made tumblr difficult for me to use in certain ways and i'm having feelings about it

[nickfowlerrr]

good for you

ronearoundblindly asked: Can you write August and 49. Out of necessity?!

GIF by callsign-fangirl

pairing: mainly - august walker x curvy!reader

warnings: 21+ ONLY. this is...smut. and kink. and smut smut smut. no d/s dynamics but some power play aspects. august gets called sir. dirty talk. some degradation. reader and august are undercover. please note i am leaving stuff out! warnings are not exhaustive, in part because i don't know how to tag them and also i know i'm forgetting stuff lol.

other characters mentioned, even just briefly: nick fowler, bucky barnes, steve rogers, lloyd hansen, walter marshall, god the bounty hunter.

words: about 4.4k

notes: this prompt completely got away from me. i think i barely touched it for like a second. i really don't know what happened lol. but thank you very much for submitting an ask, i appreciate it! <3

truthfully i don’t even know if this all makes sense but it did in my head and it really got me going so i’m sharing it with you all lol. thank you in advance to anyone who reads this madness, i hope you, at the very least, find it somewhat enjoyable. please let me know your thoughts!

“Your friend is staring,” you speak quietly as you glance over to the target idling by the entrance of the hallway. He was on his way out when he noticed August slip down the corridor, his suspicions rising instantly.

You weren’t supposed to be seen, you weren’t supposed to be there at all, but since Mr. Paranoid forced August to ditch the very expensive phone you’d made and chipped just for him, you needed to get something on him again to be able to maintain communication, to keep track of him, and though you wouldn’t say so aloud, to ensure his safety in any way you could.

You’d snuck into the event dressed as part of the waitstaff, a form fitting short black dress, nylons and two inch black heels, all of which you’d rolled your eyes at. What happened to the standard white dress shirts and black slacks?

As you walked around holding a tray of champagne, offering drinks to guests, you finally spotted him. He was sat on the armrest of the couch in the middle of the room, his target chatting with another man you’d never seen before just to the side of him.

You made your way over, taking your time passing by the two men near him, handing them the flutes of champagne as you finally felt August’s gaze on you.

You stepped closer to him as he eyed you up and down before he raised a brow at you.

You could feel the attention of his target on you both as you stood before him.

“Champagne, sir?” you asked inconspicuously.

“Is that all that’s on the table tonight?” he responded as he took a glass, his dark gaze heating you as you saw the corner of his lips twitch in a smirk.

You had to stop yourself from reacting how you wanted to and instead forced a polite but sultry smile for your onlooker.

As you started to walk away, you felt a tug on the skirt of your dress and the warmth of August’s fingers brushing against your thigh through your nylons as you moved forward. That was unexpected... You wanted to hate the feeling, more so, you should have hated the feeling. Or at least not let it effect you so much. This was a job, after all. You needed to focus and do what you were there to do.

You glanced back over your shoulder and the twinkle in his eyes as he watched you walk away had you forcing yourself to stomp down the butterflies that threatened to take flight in your stomach. You also saw the scrutinizing eyes of his target set on him as he watched you.

August’s lips moved but you couldn’t tell what it was he said as you continued to play the part and offered drinks to other guests. All you saw was the scoff he earned from the man beside him before they both looked over at you for a second longer.

You ignored them and continued on around the room. August knew you were here now, and he knew his target better than you did, so it was up to him to figure out how he’d be able to speak with you without raising any flags.

But the night grew on and you grew more and more annoyed. You were straight up catering at this point, working a whole shift. You should be getting paid for this.

The only interaction you had with August was when you’d walk by with a new tray. His mark never strayed far from him so you didn’t say much of anything. August though, was ceaseless in his flirting. Little quips you’d ignore and the touches he’d try to pass off as accidental. You weren’t the only one to notice.

After one final tray, you walked back into the kitchen to see everything was being put away.

“Are we done?” you asked the organizer.

“Mhm, nights just about over. You can see Cian for the pay,” she pointed in the direction of the back door.

“Great, thanks,” you smiled.

Shit. What were you gonna do now? You needed to get this ring on August so you could get his new home base location and set up the new surveillance. He only had about a week left undercover if all went according to plan, but you still needed to get eyes on him and get the new trackers planted and live.

“Hey, Ashley.

Ashley!

Ashley?”

You looked around the kitchen confused as to who this Cian guy was calling, the louder his voice rose the more derailed your train of thought was getting...

“Hello, Ashley?” he said again, closer to you this time he spoke.

Who the hell is… oh shit.

You spun around and forced a smile and a titter.

“Sorry,” you laughed at yourself, playing up the bubbly tone to your voice, “I’m over here in la la land.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Cian smiled, handing you a wad of cash. “If I had a man looking at me the way that guy has been looking at you all night, I’d be the same.”

“Oh,” you breathed, looking down with a soft smile, playing as coy as possible. “Was it that noticeable?”

“Oh, sweetheart,” he put his hands on your shoulders and spun you back around, “go get his number before I do.”

You laughed as he pushed you back out of the kitchen. You dropped your smile the second the door closed and stuffed your cash in your bra. Now to get him alone...

Walking back out into the party area, you immediately made eye contact with August.

His target was off in a corner talking to that same man he had been speaking to before. His back was to the room so he didn’t see you and didn’t notice August as he followed you.

You walked slowly along the wall of the room as not to draw attention from anyone before you turned down the long, dark hallway off to the side.

You were two steps down the empty corridor when August’s hands were suddenly on you, turning you to face him.

“What the hell are you doing here?” he seethed.

“Helping,” you responded with just as much enthusiasm, pulling your arm from his tight hold.

“You didn’t think to give me some kind of warning?”

“And how the hell was I supposed to do that? You completely crushed our only form of contact with you-”

“What would you rather I have done, huh? ‘Sorry, can’t break my phone, my team is listening and keeping tabs on me through it.’,” he said sarcastically, “You think that would’ve played over well?”

You didn’t have anything to say to that. But god, did he really need to be so forceful and mean when you were helping him out. Some part of you thought he'd be, you didn't know, proud? You'd never been in the field before and certainly never gone undercover. You had to do some pretty intense convincing to get the green light on this little operation. You knew August was gruff and almost always a little mean, especially to you, but the least he could do was be the tiniest bit grateful.

“Whatever,” you rolled your eyes. “Doesn’t matter now. But we need something on you.”

You reached again into your bra, August’s eyes ever attentive to your movements.

“Here,” you pulled out the ring you made for him. “It’s identical to the one you always wear, so just swap it for tonight. Once we get your new coordinates I'll be able to set up surveillance and figure out another way to get comms through."

You watch as August slips his ring off, sliding your tracker ring in its place.

You sense someone at the start of the hallway and flick your eyes over, "Your friend is staring."

"Is he now?" August asks as he steps closer to you, intruding in your space as he back you up against the wall. You don't say anything, just look in his eyes as your breathing slows for a moment.

His hand comes up as he cradles your cheek in his touch, "We better make this believable, then."

Your eyebrows furrow but you don't have time to speak a word before August pulls you close to him and kisses you hotly.

Vaguely, you're aware of the way his mark was just about to head in your direction before August pulled you into him and how he is now shaking his head as he retreats back some.

You're kissing August back with just as much fervor as his other hand slides down the curve of your waist. You're expecting his hand to settle on your hip but you murmur into the kiss as his touch slides lower before he grabs your ass as forces your body as close to his as he possibly can, earning a near squeal from you.

Of course, he finds that amusing as he smirks against your lips before he does it again. Your hands are bracing you against him, one on his chest and one on his stomach as you fist his shirt in your hand at the second grope.

You break away finally for air but he doesn't let you get away from him at all. His nose nuzzles yours and his moustache tickles you before his lips are on yours once again. Hot and firm before he slips his expert tongue into your mouth. You truly forget where you are and what you're doing as he kisses you like you've never been kissed before and his incessant hands feel up and down your body.

You're suddenly pushed back against what you think is a wall until you feel August's hand searching for something. The pushing down of a handle and the creak of a door opening directly behind you gives you some warning before you're urged back into the dark room. August spins around, leaning out of the door a bit and puts on a show of looking both ways before he pretends to spot his guy.

He smirks and sends him a wink.

"I told ya'," he says smugly as he starts to shut the door, "Give me twenty minutes."

The door shuts and August turns back to you, walking you back in the darkened room.

"You told him what?" you ask breathily despite yourself.

"That I'd be able to get you in the back room by the end of the night," he answers huskily, still advancing toward you. You gasp as your legs hit the back of something. You look over your shoulder behind you and are shoved by August down onto the lavish bed.

You scoff at him as you sit on the mattress, and he stands right in front of you. "No one can see us now," you assert, unsure as to why he still has that look in his eye. The one that spells nothing but trouble.

"No," he agrees, "but odds are he's gonna come by the door and try to eavesdrop," he gets closer and his bulge is prominent now as your mouth parts of her own accord. "You don't wanna blow my cover now do you?"

His hands come to his belt and you watch entranced as he unbuckles it and begins working at the zip of his pants, his heavy eyes never leaving you.

You look up at him as he starts to push them down and you really have no control over yourself as you lean back onto the bed, scooting up to give you both more room as he comes down and begins to crawl on top of you.

Your head is swimming as he kisses you again, his hands on your head as he guides you down.

"Such a good little agent you are," he taunts against your lips, moving down your body until his hands are between your thick thighs, spreading your legs as he keeps you open for him. "You'd do anything for a superior, wouldn't you," he breathes hotly along your skin as he easily tears your nylons, not even bothering to try and work them down your legs first.

You had forgone underwear, and you murmur as he kisses your neck, his thick fingers gliding along your now exposed cunt, feeling just how wet you are for him already. It's pathetic but you have no defense for yourself - not against his touch or his words...

He has one hand playing with your pussy and the other groping at your chest, and you know he's enjoying hearing all the little whines and whimpers he's getting out of you.

Finally, he decides he's ready to give you a little more. He holds himself above you as he stays between your legs, grabbing his thick length in one hand. He runs the tip of himself up and down your pussy, getting himself wet with your arousal and sending sparks lighting up your body as he teases your clit over and over. The sight of him, tall, built, powerful and ever superior, still dressed with his cock out as he plays with you, exposed before him, is something you never thought you'd see, but god, you can't say you aren't loving it.

He sees the moment you're about to open your mouth and plead for him, but he stops you before you can. In one swift, unexpected motion, August shoves his cock into your tight cunt and grabs your throat with his other hand, squeezing you into silence as your walls squeeze his thick length.

You bring one hand to his wrist as your eyes threaten to roll back from the overwhelming pleasure. He isn't choking you, he's just squeezing... with the perfect amount of pressure. Fuck, it's like he-

"Yeah, I knew you'd like that angel," he smirks as he moves his hips against you, rocking in and out of you as he sets his rhythm. "I just got in ya, you're goin' dumb on me already?"

You're damn near instantly a moaning mess beneath him as he fucks you, going harder and deeper with each thrust.

He's grunting over you, staring down at you with a sick dark lust swimming in his gaze that you almost wish you didn't know how to place... almost.

His smirk is unbreakable as you babble on and his hand trails from around your throat to tug down the neckline of your dress. He pulls until you sit up a bit and free your arms of their sleeves, pushing the material down your torso. He laughs at the cash you have stuffed in your bra before he tears it off of you.

His fingers move to tweak your hard nipples and you groan and gasp at the sensation, your walls tightening around his cock as he rocks his hips against yours. "Au-" your moan is cut off as he grabs your face in one hand, smooshing your cheeks while you look up at him pathetically.

"No names, angel. Don't be fucking stupid," he growls, fucking into you harder as he chases his high. "You see his shoes under the door," he whispers, your eyes move and you nod dumbly as you see them. "Don't talk until you see him leave."

He lowers himself closer to you as his hand returns to your neck. He groans as you slide one leg up the bed, keeping yourself spread wide for him as he thrusts into you. He kisses you sloppily, it's all tongue and teeth as he grunts and moans into your mouth, his mustache tickling your lip as he speaks through ragged breaths.

"Fuck, you have no idea how badly I've needed this," he says. You look back to the door and see the shoes are gone and you're alone again, briefly you wonder how August knew he was gone but you don't have the wherewithal to ask him as he keeps fucking you like he doesn't have a care in the world for anything other than your pussy. Maybe he really is just that good.

"You haven't even been undercover for a week," you respond quietly with a weak laugh as your eyelids flutter - his rushed movements stimulating your sensitive clit. God, you feel drunk. Is this really happening right now? Are you actually getting fucked by August Walker while you're both undercover and could theoretically be compromised any second? His strong hand on your hip as he sits up, keeping his cock inside you and his thick fingers rubbing your clit are your answer.

"Not just sex, angel. No, I can get that from anyone. I mean you," he thrusts into you slower now, working his cock in and out of you as he rubs your clit. Your walls are bearing down on him as you teeter on the edge of your orgasm. His eyes squeeze shut as he groans headily, "Fuck, Fowler said you were good, he didn't say just how fucking good," he says through grit teeth as his cock drags deliciously along your walls.

The mention of Nick's name has your belly in a flurry of emotions but mostly, right now anyway, it just serves to push you ever closer to that edge. You whimper a moan as your leg threatens to shake. The coil in your belly is winding tighter and tighter the more he says and the dirtier his words get. Your toes are curling as he circles your clit perfectly.

"You like that, huh? Knowing he talks about you to other men, tells us how much of a fucking slut you are for him," he taunts, each sentence punctuated by another thrust. "How pissed off do you think he'll be when I tell him just how easy it was to get you beneath me? Mm, do you think he'll even care at all? What else should he expect from a little whore like you. So desperate for everyone's approval I don't think you'd even mind being the communal slut for all of us to use whenever the fuck we want," you cry out as your orgasm hits you hard, so hard it's almost blinding. He's still playing with your clit and you're holding onto August like your life depends on it. He just doesn't stop. He moves you with surprising ease, pulling you up so you're straddling his lap now. You just came and you don't know how you're doing it, but despite your weakened legs, you start to move yourself on top of him, bouncing up and down his thick cock. His big hands are on your hips as he helps you keep the rhythm. Your arms are around his neck, your tits in his face as he holds you. You don't even really care about coming again, you just know you want to be full of him. He's right. You're desperate for approval. You wanna make him come. You want him to talk about how good you are to the other guys, just like Nick does. It's embarrassing and shameful but it's true. Everything he's saying is true. Being their shared slut sounds like heaven to you. You don't care if they just want to use you, not in the moment, anyway. You just want to be useful to them, to all of them, any way you can be. You want to be good. You want to be needed... to be wanted.

"Heard Barnes talking about you the other week, too. He get his cock in you yet?" he pants as he keeps you moving on his cock, his grip getting tighter. "Him and Rogers have a bet going, ya know. Which one of 'em will get to fuck you first. But smart money says they'll both lose. I think," he breathes, licking his lip, "you'd take 'em both at the same time - like the pathetic little whore you are, wouldn't you?"

Your eyes are closed tight as you ride his thick cock as best you can and all you can manage to do is mewl helplessly as your fingers twist in his hair. Your mind is playing out the scenes as he speaks them and it's turning you on even more... Bucky, Steve...August, Nick... Lloyd, Walter, fuck, all of them at the same time - using you however they wanted, however they needed and…God…yes.

August slaps your ass harshly, earning a yelp from you as your eyes shoot open.

"You answer me when I ask you a question, agent," he spits.

"Yes, sir," you respond obediently.

"Yes, sir, what?"

"Yes, I would take them both at the same time..." another slap to your ass, "like the pathetic little whore I am, sir," you respond as your skin feels like its on fire and your pussy squeezes his cock tighter with every word you're forced to speak.

"Fuuuck," he grunts, his hands on your soft ass, moving you up and down his shaft as your nails dig into the fabic of his shirt covering his shoulders. "I'm sure you can't wait to get back and let them fuck you every which way, but right now, angel," he husks gripping and kneading your softness, slamming you down again on his cock before he starts fucking up into you, "right now you're all mine."

His thrusts are ruthless and the only reason you're still upright is because you're clutching onto him with what little strength you have left. You bury your face in his neck as you cry and whine your pleasure, somehow finding yourself on the verge of another orgasm as he uses you like nothing more than a toy.

You mindlessly snake a hand down between your bodies and rub at your clit as you feel yourself a breath away from release.

"Greedy little thing, aren't you, angel," he taunts darkly. "You wanna come again for me? I can feel your pussy squeezing my cock. Fuck you feel so goddamn good. I'm gonna fuckin come, and you're gonna be good and take it all, aren't you?"

"Yes, sir, please," you whine, "I'm good. Whatever you want, I'll take it, please, please. Oh, fuck, please," you groan through clenched teeth, "give it to me."

You can hear your own debauchery and if his cock filling you up wasn't pure ecstasy, you just might care enough to be embarrassed by it.

He slaps your ass again, just for fun this time as he thrusts up into you. He hits hard as you gasp and he ruts up into you once, twice more, before you finally can feel his hot seed filling you up and dripping out of you as he comes hard. He's growling and swearing as he holds you to him, making sure he gets every last drop out. You're sticky, a total mess between your legs as you both catch your breath.

He moves you off of him, not carelessly, but not carefully either.

You watch as he cleans himself up and tucks his softening cock back in his pants as you pull your arms back into the sleeves of your dress.

He bends down to pick something up and you're momentarily stunned when he stands and throws your cash on you. "You definitely earned that tonight," he laughs as he buckles his belt.

You blink down at the money, seconds away from either blowing up on him or shutting down entirely, you aren’t sure…and then are once again surprised when August leans in and kisses you on the cheek.

"Thanks for the ring, angel," he says as he moves to the door. "Don't act surprised when I get back into town next week," he turns to look at you, "you'll be my first stop."

Your lips twitch, threatening to turn into a smile as you watch him leave. You wouldn’t mind that.

You wait a few minutes, having cleaned yourself up some in the en suite bathroom, before you make sure you have everything and leave as well.

You exit through the front doors and make your way down the grand front steps to your ride.

They're parked across the street, but come up to the curb as they see you approach.

You pull open the passenger side door and get in with a huff.

"Sorry, took longer than I thought it would, but he got the tracker, so... all good."

It's quiet, he doesn't respond to your explanation, not that you entirely expected him to. You never know what you’ll get with him. Sometimes he’s friendly, bordering on flirty even, and other times he’s this. After all the surveillance stakeouts you’ve been on together, you’re used to it all.

He pulls off and you're on your way back to the city. You now expect an uneventful ride, but when God pulls up to the first stop sign where no one else is around, he finally speaks.

"That necklace I gave you," he says,

You look down at the pendant he told you to wear tonight, a tracker, you assumed, "Yeah?"

He takes a deep, drawn out breath before he looks at you with his ever scrutinizing gaze.

"It's a recording device."

It's your turn to be quiet now as your skin burns. Your eyes go wide for a second before you bother trying to school your reaction. Even then, “Oh," is all you can manage to squeak out.

He looks at you as you stare unsurely at him, those bright blue eyes penetrating you. You're almost scared for a moment, wondering what he must think of you after hearing all of what he heard... not everyone is into everything, you know that. You just hope he won’t think badly of you - not only for what you did but for everything August said that you didn’t refute once, for everything you said in turn…and then he grabs your hand. You don't break eye contact as he guides your touch to his pants, making you feel his hard cock as it strains against the material of his dark jeans.

You almost can't believe it, your head swimming as reality catches up to you. Maybe your fantasy really is possible...

You squeeze his cock gently through his jeans as he keeps his eyes on you. He groans when you do it again, "You wanna be good for me, too, sweetheart? Get the whole team on board?"

You nod.

Of course you do.

[horrorshow]

Can you talk about why you think blocking and moving on is a bad thing? I thought it was a way to curate your space and avoid drama

idk maybe i'm too idealistic but fandom is a much more friendlier, welcoming, supportive, creative, engaging, active, diverse and interesting space when it's treated like a community where people are encouraged to participate and talk about their interests and where there's space for niche or more unpopular opinions without these people having to worry about being blocked and feel unwelcome by the majority of the fandom they are in. i can't stand how blocking everyone you disagree with has become the first thing to do.

you say its 'to curate your experience'. but blocking people does not only curate YOUR experience. you're also forcefully curating other users' experiences. and not for the better.

people say 'i will block you for literally anything' and then those same people wonder why engagement is down, why no one sends asks, why no one reblogs, why rarely anyone talks in the tags anymore and why this place feels so dead and boring and quiet. i wonder why!!!!

people treat real people as annoying ads they can dispose of at their whim. but that's not how a fandom or a site like tumblr works. (besides, if you really care about people curating their own experience you wouldn't block people. you can filter and blacklist and never see them again while still granting them the same freedom instead of actively making their experience worse.)

you say its to avoid drama. but seeing a post you dont agree with is not 'drama'. and blocking is not solving anything except for you personally. fandom was more fun when we remembered that every user is a real person you share a space with, and probably some mutuals as well, so you find a way to live with each other. starting with a restraining order seems a bit excessive and is not contributing to anything. it's not that hard to be respectful and tolerate others and acknowledge people have different opinions and interests and still co-exist in peace. its not that hard to be nice to people and try to find common ground with them and interact with the stuff you DO like. you do this in every aspect of your real life, so why not online?

i hear you say: 'but that requires WORK and i don't NEED to do any of that bc i can just block them'.

yeah, you can try to create your own bubble and only hang out with like minded people but you wont EVER fully achieve that (no matter how much you block, social media WILL keep feeding you posts you disagree with bc it makes them money). social media WILL pressure you into an 'us vs. them' mentality where you constantly feel like everything online is a threat or an argument you have to win and where being mean and unnuanced gives you the most notes and where you don't even see, let alone be able to treat, other users as people anymore bc you don't interact with them anymore other than to block or fight them. that's not how i want it to be online. it's not fun to me. and maybe i'm a pessimist but i think it will eventually be the death of online fandom and sites like tumblr. look at the state of twitter right now. DOES blocking give you a better experience in the long run? i doubt that it does. overall, i think it makes people even less tolerable and more vulnerable to hate and fear mongering, and social media an even more hostile place.

it's everything i hate about social media and everything i want to fight against and WILL fight against. i won't pretend my meager contribution will change anything, but i LIKE to just scroll past posts i don't vibe with and not see every argument online as a personal offense. it keeps me curious. most posts aren't that bad when you know the person behind it. i mean, you do you, i'm not gonna say what you should or shouldn't do bc that's up to you, but i recommend it: free yourself of the block button and bring back supportive user communities based on a shared love for the same thing and focus on what you have in common with people, just like you would do in real life. save the block button for the rotten apples who DO keep trying to pick fights and exclude others.

(which is, now that i think about it, probably the main difference: most people see the block button as a neutral way to prevent worse. but. that's only the case on an individual level. and treating everything online as an individual choice to which there are no further consequences, especially if they happen on a larger scale, is already a loss.)

[velvetvexations]

Have you seen the interaction between gwemmieee and faggy—butch circling your feed yet? What a mess

@gwemmieee I'm gonna tag you here because your pinned asks that people talk to you when they have issues with what you say. It seems like you might be tired of discussing the subject, though, and I encourage you to ignore this if you would you would rather. It's essentially my take on the first few things you said and why I feel like they weren't great and people were right to be bothered by it, but you don't seem like a terrible person and it's more important that you take care of yourself than throw yourself into endless argument.

@faggy--butch I'll also tag you if this feels relevant to you, lmk if you'd rather I take it out

-----

I generally keep discourse off my feed because if I follow someone who talks about the intercommunity stuff I can handle they inevitably talk about the stuff that's triggering for me. There are several people I'd love to be mutual with otherwise.

I'd heard about it but did not realize it was quite that...extensive. Mm. I'm not sure if my perspective as another transfem would help or not since she seems in a rough place over it. I'll say there her things in her original reply that faggy--butch didn't even mention that I didn't like, like claiming trans men have problems getting access to certain spaces but trans women can't exist anywhere. That's pretty dire and if not for the insistence that she believes in the validity of transandrophobia would probably be enough to get me to be mean to her, but it seems like she was genuinely trying to be negotiable, and that's an important distinction when a lot of people really are treating transmasc issues as so much lesser in comparison to transfems.

The problem is that "transandrophobes bad" is not really a negotiable position. In what way are "baby transfems" being "vilified"? It's not a matter of not being up to date. Some of the things not only transfems but also self-identified TMEs - note that the OP did not say transfems - are really vile and cruel. To jump onto a post saying that to protest that one shouldn't be too mean to them back feels...weird.

Like;

However, if a trans masc wants to hold any baby trans fem to an unreasonably high standard of always knowing what is and isn't OK to say, and what feelings are not OK to voice, instead of engaging in good faith and trying to hear them, validate them, educate them, and NOT control them, that's kinda fucked up.

That's just not happening. That's not what's going on. To say transandrophobes simply "don't know what is and isn't okay to say, and what feelings are not OK to voice" really truly is treating them like literal babies. It may not be what she meant to say but it's so hard to understand a meaning to those initial posts that aren't saying one should never get mad at a trans woman for anything they say or do because being treated like a bad person is traumatic.

She seems to have gone on to have a better conversation about it with others where she understood more of what was being said and was able to clarify her thoughts more, but that still ends with blaming others for coming in too hot and I don't think that tracks at all. Even if she didn't mean to say something, she still said what she said and it's not really fair to turn that around as everyone just misunderstanding her and it not being her fault for that.

[lucy90712]

hi love

can we get something with hector fort and f1 or f2 driver reader and fans shipping them ?:)))

This weekend is a special weekend for me it is the first time that my boyfriend is coming to watch me race. Hector and I have known each other since we were kids and we have been dating now for almost a year. He has been there for me throughout my racing career from when I did karting to when I first made it to formula 4 and even now that I've made the jump to formula 2. He hasn't been able to watch me race in f2 yet though as our schedules just haven't aligned either I'm halfway across the world or he has a match to play. He has also made a breakthrough into Barcelona’s first team this season which is why he's been so busy and missed some of my races but I don't care about that I'm just so proud of him and everything he's achieved. That being said it will be nice to have him here this weekend as I'm convinced I race better when he's here. 

He couldn't make any of the practices and qualifying or our sprint race as he had to be in training but now that it's Sunday he's here to watch the feature race. Even just knowing he's going to be here has motivated me to perform to my very best all weekend and so far it's paid off as I have had my best performances of the season. I qualified 3rd on the grid and finished 4th in the sprint race yesterday so I'm feeling good about today's race. I really want to win the feature race as it would be my first win and at my home race and with Hector here it would just be perfect. 

Hector arrived late last night but I couldn't see him as I had to get to sleep as I had to be up early to get to the track. I didn't expect to see him until I was at the track but when I woke up he text me asking when and where I was having breakfast so he could join me. By the time I was ready he was already waiting for me in the hotel lobby so we could do to the track and eat there a thats what I'm supposed to do. When we arrived there was hardly anyone there other than the other drivers and engineers which was really nice as I always hate when there's people everywhere. A few of the other drivers stopped us a we were heading to the catering tent to talk to Hector which I knew would happen but when it's not busy it's ok. 

While we had breakfast my phone was going crazy next to me but I ignored it because I wanted to enjoy my time with Hector before the stress of the race. Eventually it got so annoying that I had to see what was going on and I had hundreds of notifications from our driver group chat talking about me and Hector and thousands of Instagram notifications of new followers and tags in posts. As it turns out it wasn't as empty here as I thought as there was a number of pictures of me and Hector together in the paddock some just stood with each other and others holding hands. We have never made our relationship public knowledge as we didn't need to before but now it's been done for us. 

This was the last thing I needed before a race as instead of getting ready and getting myself in the right mindset I'm sat scrolling through Instagram comments and Twitter seeing what people have to say about me. Of course half of the stuff is hating me because I took their favourite footballer off the market which I saw coming but it still hurts to see what people say. I was so in my own world managed I didn't even notice anyone enter my drivers room until someone had taken my phone out my hands. 

"You need to forget about everything that's happened amor this isn't going to help you get ready for the race" Hector said 

"I know but I can't stop myself I want to know what everyone thinks of us because right now nothing is confirmed and they already hate me" I said 

"They can hate you all they want I'm happy and I love you so what others think shouldn't matter if anything you should want to go out there and prove to these people that you are more than just my girlfriend" Hector said 

"You're right I need to get myself ready to win" I said 

"That's the spirit I'm going to delete social media from your phone so you can focus on the race and later we can figure things out together" he said 

"Now go out there and make yourself proud" he encouraged 

He held me and gave me a kiss before leaving me so I could get my helmet on and take my car to the grid. Usually on the grid I'd get back out of the car but this time I stayed sat there getting myself ready. Hector is right I need to go out there and prove to myself that I'm better than all of those people say I am and I'm more than just his potential girlfriend. It feels more important than ever to do well in this race but to do that I need to be focused as f2 is incredibly chaotic. 

The race was chaos as I thought it might be in the first corner lots of people tried to overtake when they couldn't but luckily I managed to come out without any damage and without losing my position. From then it was about managing until my pit stop then it was time to work on moving forward. I overtook the driver in front of me not long after my pit stop then I had the mission of getting the gap in front of me down which wasn't easy as it was a good few seconds. As I was working on keeping a steady but quick rhythm with my lap times I got a radio message from my team saying that the driver in front of me had crashed so now I was in the lead with a 2 second gap behind me. There was still 10 laps left but all I had to do was be careful and keep to my target lap time which isn't too difficult. 

Then it happened I crossed the line in first place which didn't feel real until my team came on the radio congratulating me and all I could do was scream with excitement. I did it I actually did it I won my first race after all of the crazy things that have happened today. My hands were shaking like crazy as I stopped the car in front of the little first place board they have in the pit lane I could barely get myself out of the car I was just so overwhelmed but when I saw my entire team and Hector standing there waiting for me I somehow got my strength back and ran towards them. I was thrown in the air while everyone patted my back or my helmet to congratulate me. When my feet were back on the ground I took my helmet off and hugged Hector tightly as he was stood off to the side of my team. 

"I'm so proud of you you were amazing out there" he said 

"Thank you what you said earlier really motivated me I would've been a mess if you didn't take my phone off me" I said 

"Don't put your achievement on me you did that all on your own I'm just here to support you" he said 

"Well I still want to thank you for supporting me I'm so happy you are here to witness my first win" I said 

He didn't say anything back he just kissed me which we both knew was on camera but at this point who cares. Right now all I want is to celebrate my win with my boyfriend so to me it doesn't matter if people see and what they say because they don't know us and they haven't just won an f2 race. 

After the race I had interviews and other things to do but eventually I made it to my last interview. The interviewer congratulated me on my win and asked about the race then they showed me a post Hector had made on Instagram and asked me a few things about our relationship. Seeing that post and talking about him making made me smile even more than I was before because he made that post knowing I wouldn't see it anytime soon just because he wanted to show his love and support. Knowing he loves me enough to want to support me so publicly just tells me that I picked the right guy.

[fereldanwench]

I didn't want to completely sit out a year-in-review, but for reasons I'll explain at the end of this post and under a cut, doing the traditional pick-one-pic-from-each-month approach just wasn't going to work for me. So instead, here are 20 of my favorite shots (in no particular order) of Valerie from 2023!

(I'll share solo Goro shots and shippy/story shots in two other posts before the year ends.)

Some thoughts about this year (cw for anxiety and depression mentions):

So yeah. I actually hadn't planned on joining in on the virtual photography year-in-review fun in part because... Well, frankly, I wasn't sure if it would actually be fun for me.

Although I do have pictures for every month, the first third, maybe even half, of the year was a struggle on almost every conceivable level. A lot of it was shit that carried over from the end of 2022, which was also an incredibly difficult year for me. I don't really want to delve too deeply into why--Some of it was personal, some of it was professional, some of it was fandom, and if you know, you know.

The main obstacle I had here is that looking at a lot of the shots I took from about January to May (give or take a few weeks on either end) honestly reminded me of Bad Times™️. I've worked really hard to pull myself out of that depression/anxiety cycle and return to a healthier approach to fandom and online socialization in general, but I just didn't want to spend a lot of time in that mental space. There are a few shots from those months that made it to my favorites, and I hope one day I can look back on that stuff and just feel the good from it again. Alas, that day is still not here.

But I am happy to report that the other reason I wanted to approach the review differently is a lot more positive! It's also two-fold: 1) I spent the earlier part of this year exploring more of a technical side of virtual photography and 2) I was really prolific the last third or so of this year so trying to narrow faves from about August until now was just not possible.

One of the few good things about the end of 2022 was being able to upgrade my graphics card, which meant I then had a rig that could support ray-tracing and hot sampling. As a result, I started putting a lot more focus on lighting and getting acquainted with new tools. I also was trying to work with the new AMM posing system, which is very convenient in some ways (100s of poses without reloading the game!) and a complete pain in the ass in others (can't move characters without their poses breaking!). Custom photomode poses + Nibbles Replacer has been the game changer I've been waiting for.

Or to put it more succinctly, December 2022 through about April 2023 felt like a relearning/return to basics kind of creative period, which is essential, but also means I just don't really like a lot of what I did, lmao.

Then, shockingly (I'm not shocked at all), starting treatment for my anxiety and depression in the second half of this year suddenly made creating a lot easier and fun again! Crazy how that works.

Even bumping this little review up to 20 shots instead of 12, there are still pictures from the past few months that I had to cut as favorites. There was just no way I could condense the amount of fave shots I took from August to now in just 5 options.

I also owe quite a bit of this revival to modders for asking me if I wanted to take shots for them--Exploring more of a fashion photography approach to my shots I think did a lot to build on what I had learned earlier in the year and encouraged me to try something new. I don't want to tag anyone in this long-ass glorified diary entry, but if you invited me to take mod shots for you, just know that it really meant a lot. ♡

And that's where my head has been with a yearly review! Is filling out a little template with 12 pictures this serious? No, it definitely is not, lmao. But hey, overthinking shit is still something I'm working on. ✌️

[housewarningparty]

If you're still interested in doing the AU concepts thing I would love to give you an opportunity to talk and to hear more about s7 hot janitor!Faith

The biggest weakness of s7 au is that I don't actually want to deal with the plot of s7 at all, I just think working class ex con Faith would be really hot and it would be cool if she and Buffy teamed up again. So with the disclaimer that this is strongly vibes over plot

Definitely envisioning a s7 that's more aligned with what "Lessons" set up: Hellmouth shenanigans at Sunnydale High, but this time Buffy is approaching things from the perspective of a counselor instead of a student. More lower stakes MotW style events. Some kind of Hellmouth centric big bad - maybe an evil PTA or something. Who gives a shit.

S7 feels like a good time for Faith to re-enter the scene anyway. Not that everyone's over what she did, but SO many monumental shifts have happened, I think she'd be an easier pill to swallow at this point. Anyway I like the one in/one out rule for redemption arc baddies. A Spikeless Scooby Gang feels like it has room for Faith

The 50/50 Sunnydale High split that Counselor Buffy and Janitor Faith are able to work out is pretty efficient. Being closer to students and faculty means Buffy can keep an eye on rumors and look out for trouble that way, while Faith literally has the keys to the building and license to be pretty much anywhere at any time. I also like the idea that there are certain kids in a particular kind of trouble that would gravitate more to Faith than to Buffy, but that they might be able to work together to help those kids anyway

The high school rumor mill around Buffy and Faith would be insane btw. Dawn would get so sick of people asking her what their deal is. But Buffy and Faith are always whispering to each other off in some corner! They arrive at school together sometimes! They're always staring at each other! SOMETHING IS GOING ON

Dawn would definitely struggle at first with accepting Faith, I think she'd be very committed to resenting her on principle, but the key to Faith's relationships in this au is not winning people over by charming them, but simply by being there, doing what she said she would do regardless of how other people treat her. She is trying very VERY hard to take the lessons of prison and the Angel Brain Walk to heart. But much like in actual s7, the key difference in dynamic between Dawn and Faith vs Dawn and the rest of the Scoobies is that Faith doesn't treat her like a little sister. She doesn't try to tell Dawn what to do or how to be, but I think she'd look out for her in her own way - noticing when a store clerk clocks Dawn shoplifting and subtly stepping in to make sure Dawn puts everything back before she leaves the store so she can't get in trouble, covering for Dawn when she wants to sneak out, stuff like that.

@jewishsuperfam and I have talked about an s7 AU a bunch before, tagging her to jump in and embellish this if she wants to

[weirdmageddon]

personal customization

(originally written 8/24/24 on cohost)

i realize i dont feel like i outwardly personalize the things i own unless they’re gifts from others and i just arrange them.

i live according to my absolute bare needs to an insane degree because i get so involved in my work and in my head sorting abstract bookshelves.

i’ve had my laptop for 4 years and it still never occurred to me to change the wallpaper or customize anything. i just have other things in mind when i boot it up. i keep the same discord icon for months at a time, often over a year.

earlier my mom bought me binders that my looseleaf anatomy & physiology textbook could fit into and wrote my name on them, because it didnt even occur to me to do that. she said, “wow you never personalize your stuff! i have to personalize everything i have! even in college in your dorm room you were living out of your cardboard boxes.” (this is true. one band poster on the wall, one mood lamp, unpacked my clothes into the drawers, laptop on my desk, the small flat-screen tv from my room at home, nintendo switch i barely used there anyway, and that’s it. everything else was out of the cardboard boxes.)

“you’re like jon who was able to live with a lamp, a single mattress on his floor, and his chemistry research.”

i really could be as long as my physiological needs are met (im sensitive to temperature and humidity so i would need the modern convenience of need air conditioning) i really don't need much.

i just dont think to buy things for myself. i rarely ask for anything either because i don’t think to ask, unless it’s something necessary. i’m extremely low maintenance. literally ive been living off of people’s kindness. i don’t know how to repay it physically but through spending quality time with them. analyzing and explaining to them what it means to me, sage advice, and giving myself to them to solve technical issues, chores, etc..

i greatly admire people who are able to transform a space into something that oozes character and color and feels cozy, personalized, just because. i also find i do also end up doing this... but it's entirely by accident. it turns into a collection of objects i accumulate or am passively drawn to, such as in my own room where i have a black light and a UV-sensitive duvet cover that i thought was interesting and i like having in my space. but i'm not one for really adding or changing the things in my space. it stays pretty inert unless someone gives me a thing, but even then it depends on if i want to keep it and where i would keep it.

does this mean i have no aesthetic preferences? certainly not. i'm a sucker for art and art that conveys a certain inexplicable expression to me. it's extremely important to me. i like looking at it, but it's something i collect and appreciate rather than something i show off i guess. i'd say i do have a distinctive taste, despite my blindness to outward personalization. two tags on my sideblog where i collect things i like (they sometimes overlap):

#aes

#art insp

i have a sleeve of stickers but i don't know where to stick them. i have things that i very much enjoy but for some reason i don't decorate the things i own with them unless the urge is overwhelming. because i think, what if this thing i stick it to gets old? what if something else comes along that i wish i had stuck it to instead? then i'll have to throw the stickers out too. and i'll feel like it was a waste. so i just feel paralyzed, i don't do anything, and it's easier not to think about it and instead focus on other things. or leave it to somebody else, but under my guidance.

i'm the kinda person who will squeeze every last drop out of something before throwing it out. i've been using the same black strapbag since middle school and i just graduated college with a 4-year degree this year. even when it comes to toothbrushes my mom is the one who realizes they need to be changed before i do, because like, they're still workable to me. i'm the complete and total opposite of the fast fashion mindset. i habitually live by the hand-me-down creed. all that matters is comfort, convenience, and lasts a long time. style and appearance is secondary. and i only really worry about it if i have to impress someone or make a good impression, but it's not what i naturally gravitate towards personally as an individual.

i really just don't need much but i profoundly appreciate people who gift me things especially if i will get a lot of use out of them. gift giving isn't how i express my gratitude in return, though, because i'm never fully confident in my gifts unless they're exactly what someone asked for (and they know it), but i think i make up for it in other ways. i will give something i own that's meaningful to me to someone if i happen to like them enough.

i feel bad getting gifts that i know i won't get a lot of use out of because i feel like i let the person down, or they wasted their money despite me understanding it as a heartfelt gift. but i sort of equate the heartfeltness of the gift with how much use potential it has for me, how much i'll be able to get out of it. i feel like i'm cheating them out of something if i can't. they spent their resources for me, and it would be a waste if i couldn't put it to use or appreciate having it for a long time. and if someone does that for me i want to get the most out of it, but i can't get the most out of everything. and it makes me feel bad on their behalf, like i'd want to regift it so they can get their money back if i can't get their money's worth out of it, but i also want them to know i appreciate that they thought of me enough to get me something. but i know people don't take well to that or would find it offensive, even though i don't mean it like that.

my own state of existence is kind of monotonous if i dont have people giving me new impressions. i don’t think about material things except in the sense of how they “have” to be. i just habitually do the bare minimum to be functional without even realizing i can get things that i want to. my own desires aren’t as strong as me weighing pros/cons about how i spend my time and if it’s worth investing my Whole Being into doing something. i end up being on extreme or the other: putting my whole being in or none at all. there’s no half-assing anything with me. im literally incapable of doing it. (executive dysfunction DOES NOT HELP EITHER)

despite all this someone online who doesn't know me all that well (just an acquaintance) described me as having elegant vibes. when people think of elegant i assume they think of physical elegance, but i think mental elegance is a better way of describing me. i know that i love the aesthetic principle of elegance a lot: unusual effectiveness + simplicity. and if that's the basic definition that underlies elegance in artful expression (e.g. visual design) and logical systems (e.g. mathematics), then i would consider myself elegant. i always tend to look for the broadest but most precise encapsulation of a thing, and that in itself carries elegance with it. ...... but i also like a bit of a unique tacky spin thrown in too. in fact, elegance is the reason i started posting on cohost. it's the elegant blogging platform i couldve asked for. fresh start, small space. easy markdown and html options if necessary. starting with visually customizing my page is overwhelming and it always ends up second to its primary functional purpose, which is to transmit the input of words from my keyboard to your computer screen. that is primarily my vehicle of expression of self. it doesn’t mean i don’t admire people’s customization. in fact it’s one of the things i most admire and wish i had for myself. i just get so overwhelmed i don’t even know where to begin, but it’s also secondary to my thoughts and what i have to communicate.

(tumblr edit: well shit lol byebye cohost)

[mayullla]

Hello

I hope you're doing great and having a good day

May i request Albedo🍀🦋?

I hope i didnt miss anything

-thank you very much

Title: Momentary Paradise

Character(s): Albedo (Genshin Impact) Summary: He always had this dream of you long before he could even open his eyes. Your arms was like a paradise to him in those moments but he wanted it to be forever. Warnings/tags: Yandere themes, fem!reader, reader is 'similar' to Albedo~

[ - A little present~! Event - Closed - ]

Albedo always had this dream that never left his mind. It was long before he was able to open his eyes and see the world and walk with two feet.

When he was still inside a vial sleeping ever so soundly.

Was it a dream or not he wasn't sure, sometimes he would dream of it again, when he was so tired after a long day's work or when he felt the world was too heavy for him to burden. Your voice was soft and gentle, hands holding him ever so gently. The soft warmth that wrapped around him, he could not forget.

It was a kind of momentary paradise for him. As every day he hoped to see you again as he close his eyes, disappointed when he wasn't able to and the sun rise.

Yet with each passing day, his dreams become blurry of you. Each day he feels like a small detail fades to nothing, a blurred mess that he didn't want it to be. He never forgot, yet the fear of forgetting made him scared as he wondered if he did. Your eyes were clear in his mind yet at the same time so hard to grasp.

He remembers each and every single detail of what you look like, shown on the portrait he was slowly painting as if to put every single detail of you within it. To case it that he might forget, that these thoughts would one time eat him alive.

Every strand of hair, eyelash, the memories of your eyes and your skin were still vivid in his mind. The warm touch of your care. Patiently he painted every single detail but inside his heart he was impatient. His creator Gold didn't know who you were, raising her eyebrow in interest at his words when he told you who you were.

Pausing he took a step back to admire his work. He could not help but feel a little disappointed as he looked at the drawing. What oil paint could not make was natural heat, what it could not make was movement nor could it make sounds.

Not yours.

Instead of continuing tho, he placed his paintbrush down cleaning his hand from the paint and chalk. He heard the sounds of the steps and voices familiar to him one that belonged to the soft-spoken Sucrose and the high pitch Paimon. He assumed that the traveler was there too as they and Paimon were almost never apart.

"Albedo we are back from our travel! We also ran into Sucrose while heading up the mountain." The high-pitched voice of Paimon called out his name. Glancing at the portrait for a moment he left the room to greet the visitors and who he considers as friends.

"Albedo here are the materials that you asked for! Paimon and Traveller had a hard time finding half of this stuff so the pay better be good." Paimons placed her hands on her waist, with a pout narrowing her eyes at him.

"I don't know how you managed to find out where so many of these materials are and how to find them otherwise the traveler and I would be running in circles getting nothing done."

Albedo greeted the traveler taking the bag that he had asked them to store the ingredients when they found them. What was once light and with empty compartments now was heavy. Checking if they have found everything that he asked he looked at Paimon and smiled at her.

"Do not worry Paimon. I made sure to pay extra for all your troubles." Albedo chuckled as he watched Paimon perk up, her eyes excited.

"You better! After traveling the desert and climbing the highest mountains I want to eat the most delicious food of all of Teyvat now! I want to eat sweet madame, chicken-mushroom skewer, and fisherman's toast!" Paimon nodded smiling happily at the thought of the money that would soon be used to fill her stomach. While the traveller could not help but sigh at her antics still a small smile on their lips as they tease their little companion.

Albedo chuckled, grabbing a bag filled with mora he handed them their commission fee. "Thanks again for procuring this for me. With this, my experiment would be able to make some progress." Albedo told them.

Paimon tilts her head at what he said, curious as to why he would need such rare materials for research "If you don't mind me asking. What are you experimenting to need so many rare materials?" Paimon asked leaning a little more forward.

"Hmmm, I am afraid that I can't say. This is rather personal for me so it would be hard to say. Sorry, Paimon." Albedo apologized, to which Paimon quickly waved her hands "Don't worry about it, I was just curious that is all. If you don't wanna say anything, you don't have to!" Paimon told him, waving her hand at him.

After some tea and catching up the traveler and Paimon started to head down the mountain not before offering Albedo if he wanted to join them. "You sure you don't want to join us? We are gonna eat a ton of delicious food, join us! More the merrier!" Paimon flew a little higher excited at the thought of food again (the snacks were nice but not enough for her) but Albedo shook his head.

"Thank Paimon, but with the materials now here I want to get everything started."

"All right, well see yeah Albedo! Message us when you need help again or just wanna hang out!"

Albedo watched them head down the mountain till he could no longer see them before he started heading up the mountain with the materials on hand, a narrow and dangerous road he walked higher and higher up the mountain till he reached a small cave that no one knows about...

... all except him.

Walking in he walked towards a blank wall, he moved steps that he had memorized a long time ago and at the last step, pulling a lever hidden behind a wall of ice the wall groaned and rumbled. What was once a wall now showed a pathway.

After waiting for a little while when all the rumbling stopped Albedo walked in before the wall closed again. Walking in the dark, the place brightened by the flickers of torches. He reached deep within the cave, and there stand a woman silently sleeping in a casket.

Surrounded her were flowers that wither slower than normal flowers, reaching the casket Albedo examined the flowers before placing the bag of materials that he had gotten from the traveler and Paimon. "I should change the flowers soon, they are starting to brown around the edges."

Walking closer he looked at you, your eyes closed as if you were really sleeping.

However, there was no pulse. There was no movement.

You looked like a timeless doll, beautiful and fragile, so well taken care of. Raising his hand he touched your face cold as ice. "I am back..." Abedo whispered softly, examining your skin... even cold looked real.

"I was finally able to acquire all the remaining materials needed." Albedo continued to whisper softly, softly rubbing your cheek and slipping his hand down to your neck where there was a yellow diamond just like his on the center of your neck.

Just a little bit more, and you would finally wake up and all the experiments he had done for years would be worth it. Just a little bit more and you would look at him with those lovely eyes and laugh in that soft gentle voice in his arms.

This time you and he would be together forever instead of a short paradise.

[kuebiko-writing]

✧ Maji ✧ 20's ✧ she/her ✧ Secondhand Writer ✧

Hi! My name is Maji (ma-jee). I thought curating a blog all about writing would be fun, so here I am! A little bit about me: I struggle with social anxiety and possibly agoraphobia, and I'm at home all day, every day, with plenty of time for writing. I don't write as much as I want to, so surrounding myself with content about writing will hopefully give me a much needed boost in inspiration and motivation.

I believe writer's block is a thing (nuanced) and I'm always looking for ways to beat it.

If you're reading this and you're into writing as well, hello fellow tormented soul! Have you written anything today? Maybe you're staring at the dreaded blank page or scrolling through writeblr like I am instead of writing? 🧐 Please give me a follow or interact so I can check your blog out! I'm shy, but I would love to be mutuals and just like and reblog your content.

Feel free to tag me in tag games and stuff! It might take me a while to get to them though. ʚĭɞ

Running a worldbuilding blog @the-desert-lands

Random things about me:

I love coffee, but I'm biased towards hot chocolate as well. Also I can be bribed with cookies, just saying.

I used to be able to read 300 page books in a day. I'd just get so lost in the sauce. Now I'm lucky if I read a whole chapter. How I have fallen. 😔 (Trying to fix this by reading an hour at a time)

I don't know anything about Franz Kafka or Clarice Lispector or Slyvia Plath but they're tortured and relatable and their writing is like a spoonful of honey. (Idk why I'm saying this)

If you write anything that had to do with religious trauma- or any trauma really- please let me know! That's the good stuff.

───────────────────

CURRENT WIP

The Immortal And His Fox

ᴄᴜʀʀᴇɴᴛ Sᴏɴɢ

SOME BOOKS ɪ READ AND LOVED

The Good Demon by Jimmy Cajoleas Rosehead by Ksenia Anske Wetlands by Charlotte Roche Flambards by K.M Peyton Voice of The Blood Jemiah Jefferson The Captive Prince Series by C.S Pacat

MY ᴜʟᴛɪᴍᴀᴛᴇ ɢᴏᴀʟS

Complete the stories I start Learn to love writing more Make writing an escape from reality Make ocs that people will want to ask questions about, cosplay as, and make fanfics/fan art for

───────────────────

My posts are under the tag #mine & #scribbles (#bookmarked is for stuff I want to come back to)

──────•••••••──────

[mandobatemans]

sfw/nsfw joel miller headcanons

co-written by my lovely bestie who doesn't have tumblr :(

warnings: post-outbreak, mentions of oral (m!receiving), sex mentions, discussion of kinks, slight breeding kink, afab! reader, NSFW UNDER THE CUT

word count: 692

also posted to ao3

• loves to comb and braid your hair. he’s a girl dad through and through, able to do more intricate braids and styles than you could possibly imagine with a lack of any hair products. he likes doing your hair, and the feeling of his fingers moving gently across your head is comforting

• loves being complimented/praised but will pretend he's annoyed to hide the embarrassment from it, especially if it’s in front of ellie. “you know, you look really handsome today.” he’ll mumble noncommittally and add, “‘s that gonna help us in this damn cold?”

• soft degradation/humiliation kink. “can you take it, darlin’? i don't think you can take it. show me how well you can take it.”

• easily gets jealous but not the type to act cold/rude to you because he's feeling insecure

• in jackson, if someone’s getting a little too close to you for his liking in the mess hall, he’ll wander over to you, rest his arm on the bartop next to you, greet you with a kiss, and casually sip his beer

• when you're alone is when he'd make comments seeking affirmation that you love him and that he's enough for you by commenting on subtle things in passing like "i know i'm old but—" "if there’s anything else i can do for you..."

• loves when you wash his hair in the shower and absentmindedly play with it when you're sitting together, a sucker for back scratches and belly kisses. he melts into your touch when you scratch his beard for him

• physical touch and gift giving/providing for you is definitely his love language (little spoon joel, we love you)

• little things like silently giving you an extra share of rations or packing an extra blanket for you

• gently touching his hand to the small of your back to warn you when there's danger

• loves when you ride him

• his fingers leave bruises from how tight he grips your waist while you’re on top of him, bruises that he’ll apologize for and kiss better before you go to bed

• is adamant that he prefers to be in control but folds immediately as soon you whisper filthy nonsense into his ear

• speaking of his ears, they're so sensitive from years of shooting, so he becomes an absolute mess when you place a few strategically bites/kisses there

• never rushes you when you're on your knees for him. he drinks in every second of you like this. pushes strands of your hair behind your ears and mumbles repeatedly how pretty you look and what a good job you're doing

• he slowly learns how to open up and gets better at expressing emotions once in jackson, partly because he feels safe enough to do so, partly because he’s been reminded what it's like to almost lose someone you love, and partly because seeing tommy so happy with maria helps him to realize what he has with you

• learns old songs on his guitar that you used to like before the outbreak. some of them he’s never heard of, and when you sing him a few of the lyrics he gives you a confused look. “you really listened to that stuff?” he’ll ask, before shaking his head and strumming an old western he thinks you'll like instead

• controversial take but he might have a teensy weensy breeding kink. he’s not going to bring another child into this world, in his eyes that would just be cruel. plus, he’s already felt the pain of losing one child and almost losing another that there’s no way he could handle it if anything happened to the baby

• that doesn't mean he hasn’t thought about you as the mother of his child, belly swelling with a little one that's half him, half you

• sometimes he’ll cum inside you rather than pulling out. it’s a selfish risk he takes but he can't help the euphoria that flows over him when he sees your cunt full of his cum, the rest dripping down your thighs

tagging: @laters-gators @cassianendor @eupheme @psychedelic-ink whose blogs have been absolutely FEEDING my joel obsession lately

[maochira]

Aah hi :) this is my first time requesting

May I please get a itoshi! Sister reader

Where the brothers leave her behind and out of spite and anger she starts playing soccer and is really good at it and she makes a name for herself, and she's super famous and a reporter asks her about her brothers, and she says something along the lines "I don't want to talk to them" and would ignore anything to do with her brothers? Just a lot of angst :D

Sorry if this is too long :>

Sorry for taking so long to respond to this!! I took a short break from Itoshi sibling requests. But I'm back with them! Also I only write gn!reader stuff, I hope you don't mind!

Requests are open!

Masterlist and request rules

Itoshi siblings masterlist

Tags: gn!youngest Itoshi!reader, kind of angsty

-being the youngest, you were overlooked most of the time. All the attention was on Sae and when he left to go to Spain, the rest of the attention got put on Rin

-you didn't play soccer or had any other talents in sports, so of course you were overlooked, even by your parents

-Rin missed playing with Sae, so he asked you to play with him instead. But it only got him frustrated because you're by far not as good at soccer as your brothers

-the way Rin told you about you being so bad at soccer really wasn't nice. Usually, he's a lot nicer to you because after Sae left you two got much closer, so this was pretty out of character of him

-and whenever you addressed that to Rin, he'd either ignore or brush it off as something small, no matter how often you explained it hurt your feelings. Rin was too busy being frustrated about not being able to play with Sae anymore, so he knew he'd have to replace him by himself, since you weren't good enough

-that frustrated you so much, you swore to yourself that you wouldn't play soccer with Rin ever again, and how instead you would only want to play against him in the future. Because you wanted to beat him and Sae

-your rivalry towards Rin and Sae actually developed before the one between them started. You just kept it to yourself all the time and would answer other things whenever you were asked why you started soccer

-you became a great player very quickly, getting close to Rin's skill faster than expected

-Rin was excited about you getting so great, but you still refused to play together with him

-once Rin started getting bitter about Sae, you revealed your goal to beat both of them one day, which Rin is surprised by. He was also a little hurt because he thought you might be able to beat Sae together one day, but this also motivated him to be better than you and Sae. He was already better than you, so that's one thing he had for the time being. But he wanted to prevent you from ever getting better than him

-while Rin was in Blue Lock, you improved even more with your skills and got invited into a team overseas. It wasn't not as good as Sae's, but you still accepted that offer because you want to get your name out there into the world, so you saw this as the next step

-you travelled back to Japan to watch the U-20 match, where Rin and Sae spotted you in the audience. For Rin, it was kind of bittersweet that you came to watch. Sae doesn't know anything about your rivalry towards him yet, so he was happy to see you

[growling]

due to being both aromantic and aplatonic i feel pretty "eh" to both concepts of friendships and relationships/couples in media (and in real life too but i'm more. discreet about it) which makes interacting with fandom works and such.. pretty frustrating at times

im more averse to romance in real life than in fiction ill have to admit, like, most ships i don't mind. im still more able to engage in shipping in my free time, but that might be because, like, when i ship characters i don't really... do it in a romantic sense i just mash them together, i like deeper bonds/relations/connections like that, and "ship" is a pretty easy term to apply to it as and kinda accurate, i don't know, hard to explain. but when theyre depicted to do traditionally romantic things together or just put emphasis on looooove and go all dovey-eyes in fanart then i must leave. i had enough i have assessed the situation and im leaving

but. i also don't like friendships in fanworks. which sucks so much because this is what, like, most other people that don't like romance gravitate to too!! and they put.. so much, like, moral stuff into liking it too like, saying that if you dont appreciate platonic relationships enough then that means allonormativity rotted your brain or something. many other aro & non-aplatonic people just go "romantic ships are so overdone so heres more art and works where characters are just allowed to stay friends, maybe even friendships are just superior anyway" and like i am happy for you don't get me wrong go enjoy what you like but.... friendships just always make me go "ewww". and unfortunately i cannot just choose not to see it either, platonic relationships are never tagged or anything except on ao3 or something. a lot of media/content (god i hate that term for fanworks..) by aros for aros just focuses on platonic love & relationships instead and sorry i cannot relate and the growler feels a bit alienated. not many people even know that aplatonic people exist anyway and if they do then they dont have the best opinion of us.

so like, god i hate clarifying this i feel like it goes without saying but whatever i don't want to get accused of hurting peoples feelings by saying this: i am not saying to stop making fanfics of platonic relationships or that if you like friends in fiction then i think ur lame or something. im just saying that this is one part of fandom i just, cannot really like. not just fandom either. friendships are everywhere i swear and there is no way for me to avoid those either, and if i ever voice that it repulses me, i get treated like a freak even by spaces that are supposedly aroace & sex/romance-repulsed friendly and yeah it kinda sucks .

anyway friendships are overrated i don't want friends i want evil advisors, loyal goons and homoerotic rivals and fucked up hero-villain and whumper-whumpee pairs and even more fucked up guys with their fates forever entwined and bonded for life close in the way rats tied at their tails are even as they desperately pull and scratch and bite to get away is that too much to ask

[cherry-flavoured-thot]

i've got an obey me ask

imagine an mc that's just been plucked for the program being from the complete opposite end of the financial spectrum of our beloved cast of pixelated men.

an mc that grew up/was living paycheck to paycheck, barely able to make ends need and feed themselves. it'd be literally night to day with them. they'd gasp over price tags and shopping totals reading thousands of grimm, still stuck in the mindset of "that'll break the bank." a spreadsheet on their computer of their money spending and gaining (i can't remember the proper terms for that stuff, it's been a hot minute since i learned it all in middle school), a long list of things they think they could never stored somewhere.

sure, it'd be on their student file that that's what their life was back in the human world, but whether anyone knows or not besides them is up to you (id imagine lucifer would probably gloss over it completely in the rush of getting paperwork done so he can get to bed before 5am lol grumpy old man needs sleep). poor thing might break down if anyone knew..

sorry if this seems odd, i just feel that as someone who's right there in the pay-to-pay situation, i'd be in complete shock of being able to actually (and easily) afford things without having to debate whether i really needed it or earned it.

if anything in the text is broke, i blame tumblr desktop version. my phone isn't working the best so i had to move here from mobile ;-;

"You spent how much on....?" Is a question the mc repeats to every brother but with different things. Demonus, designer clothes, figurines, skincare products, food, books, ancient objects, new blankets and pillows etc. But no one really thinks too much of it, despite mc's shock every time.

It's not until Mammon complains one time about how broke he is, and mc turns to him, looking him dead in the face saying. "You could easily survive the week with that much." Then they proceed to write him up a budget with the minimal amount of Grimm in his account.

"...mc how did you do that?"

"Oh I'm a pro, I once lived off of five dollars and spite for a full week." Mammon, is casually bringing this up with Lucifer next time he sees him.

"You didn't mention mc was flat broke before comin' here."

"...that's because I wasn't aware." Lucifer is pulling up mc's student file, and there it is in big bold writing. Lucifer and Mammon both have a lightbulb moment, thinking about different occasions where the topic of money came up and mc was acting strange. "If I were you, I'd minimize mentions of your spending habits around mc."

"...yeah." Mammon feels so guilty. That not only does he stick to mc's budget, he always mentions to them when he's managed to save money rather than spend it. But he'll still be a devil on their shoulder encouraging them to splurge a little on themselves because they deserve it.

Lucifer, Satan and Asmodeus would be using this knowledge to let mc know they are providers. (Mammon would too. He would but his budget skills are bad so he's a sometimes provider!) They will always make sure mc is financially good, so feel free to spend (within reason - Lucifer would argue). (You deserve to be spoilt - Asmodeus, Satan)

Beelzebub and Leviathan, would just buy things for mc instead when the opportunity arises. Beel will always pay when inviting mc out for food, it's his treat. mc was talking about wanting to get a game? well they don't need to get because Levi had it express delivered to the front door. (Mammon would also do this when he has money lmao)

"If you want it just buy it." Belphegor is firmly in the middle ground, because he'll tiredly tell mc those words, when they've been debating aloud to get the thing in question. If they mention it's too expensive and talk themselves out of buying it. He just gets it for them.

[toastedjeans]

Introducing...

TOWER OMENS

A Good Omens and Pizza Tower crossover AU! Because apparently i love combining stuff that couldn't be more different from each other and seeing how it fits.

HEADS UP! If you aren't familiar with Good Omens or haven't seen the series yet, i highly recommend you ignore this post. There will be spoilers! Block the tag "#Tower Omens" for future posts if necessary.

With that out of the way, let's get right into it! [LOTS OF TEXT AHEAD I'M SO SORRY]

But before we look at the characters, a thing i want to mention is that instead of London, most of the events will take place somewhere in Italy. That means that some events, locations, and references will be different from the source material. You'll see what exactly i mean when we get to the timeline changes.

Oh also this will be pepstavo heavy. Because it's my AU and I'm predictable.

Anyway, here's the characters + the percentage of how likely it is they'll keep that role

Peppino as Crowley [1000%]

For being a demon, he's actually a surprisingly good person, and would never hurt anyone innocent. He fell cause he got mad one too many times, and now he's got trauma from the Fall. Other demons don't trust him and keep making his existence harder than it already is. He hates being reminded of the angel he once was, it makes him feel like a failure. Despite that, he would never want to become an angel again, in fear of falling again and going through the same traumatic experience a second time. Also Maurice is up there.

Instead of a snake, his animal form is a cow. No, not a bull. For reasons. His demonic mark is a big mole, burn mark, or scar in the form of a cow's head/skull located on his upper arm.

Instead of the Bentley, Peppino will drive an old Vespa, AND he'll be the one with an establishment. So instead of Aziraphale's bookshop, there will be Peppino's pizzeria! His pizzas are the best in town, not because he yells at them to be better, but because he's just so passionate about cooking. He has small horns he has to hide underneath various hats, and unlike Crowley, he can only marginally change his hair. Sure, he can make them longer, but he'll remain bald so he won't ever be able to hide the horns underneath hair. Usually he wears a chef's hat, and only takes it off around someone he trusts. Also, because of the anxiety, he's a terrible liar.

Lastly, he absolutely hates rats, and only tolerates them when he sees how sweet Gus is to them. But he would never hurt them of course. He just thinks they shouldn't be anywhere near him. Ever. But spoiler alert, he warms up to them cause of Gustavo.

Gustavo as Aziraphale [1000%]

As an angel, he's a good person, but he can still be mischievous at times. He can hide his nervousness pretty well, therefore he is a decent liar, and always here to help Peppino out of a situation when he can't come up with a lie himself. He's very powerful and can get extremely scary when angered. You know he'll kick Maurice's ass once he finds out how he used to treat Peppino.

Gus used to just make food appear with miracles, but after asking Peppino why he didn't do it as well, Pep teaches him how to cook. He sees how passionate he is and how much he's enjoying himself, so he starts to enjoy it a lot as well. They then become coworkers in the pizzeria.

He's more comfortable with experimenting with clothes, so he will appear more feminine in various eras, and sometimes still with the moustache because yes. He has an affinity for animals, especially rats. Instead of magic tricks, he will train rats and then do a little rat circus show (he doesn't harm them of course). Sometimes he feeds rats after shifts and talks to them, basically to keep them out of the pizzeria while Peppino is near.

Maurice as Metatron [95%]

Our favorite scumbag. He used to bully Peppino relentlessly, and still keeps insulting him even when he's not around. But he shuts up around Gustavo cause he's incredibly afraid of him, but won't ever admit it. Knows how powerful he can get. Is always kinda aggressive, but mostly just talks shit and threatens anyone who crosses him with The Fall™. Since he's God's right hand everyone is kinda afraid of him. Hates Noisette and is glad when she disappears and later on leaves

Ziti as Muriel [100%]

They have absolutely no clue what they're doing, but they're doing their best. Afraid of pretty much everyone, especially higher ranking angels since they're authority (yes, even Burton). An even more terrible liar than Peppino. They've never been treated with kindness before, so they grow attached to Peppino and Gustavo really quickly.

They pose as a health inspector instead of police (and i can make them wear a suit!!!). Gus shows them some rats and they immediately fall in love with them. Of course they don't know anything about Earth, as far as they're concerned, rats in the kitchen are a normal thing. Pests? No, look at them, they're too cute to be pests! (Also side note, as much as i still don't quite like Ziti as much, they're perfect for Muriel. I can't see anyone else in that role!)

Noise as Beelzebub [95%]

You know he hates Peppino. When he's in hell, he wears his suit, and his rat ears and tail are visible. But when on Earth (he doesn't come there often, he hates it), he sometimes wears his regular outfit to hide his ears and tail. It's really uncomfortable to him though. Instead of flies, he has fleas who are always surrounding his head. They look like tiny Noisys :).

He'd never admit it but he has a huge crush on Noisette. Even gave Noisette a flea container that now lives in her bunny hood.

Noisette as Gabriel [95%]

First off, major change from the series, hear me out. She's besties with Gustavo. While she's sort of the leader of Heaven, she sometimes lets herself get pushed around by other archangels when there's things she doesn't wanna do. Like punishing Gustavo after the failed Armageddon event. She still feels bad that she had to do this.

Other than that, she's oblivious as hell (pun not intended). She loves spending time with Noise and doesn't care that he's a demon. Or maybe she doesn't quite realize. I mean, he's nice to her, and he's funny. Anyway, even on Earth she keeps her bunny hood up, almost like it's part of her.

As Jim, she will be called Hazel. Since i don't want her to come back naked she just doesn't have the bunny hood on. It triggers her memories but she gets headaches from them, so she can only keep wearing it after getting her memories back. One of Noise's fleas is always on her and she keeps accidentally almost killing it by scratching herself.

Mr Stick as Michael [70%]

Really wants to be in charge, but he doesn't know what he's doing. He relies on the other archangels to do his job but he still wants to be the leader. Just. Without the responsibilities or having to make choices. He thinks he's extremely smart and knows everything better than anyone else. But when tested he insists that everyone else is tricking him or cheating (his waluigi side is showing...). Wants to be intimidating but i mean look at him. He's a twig. I could snap him in half with one hand. And I'm damn weak.

Burton as Sandalphon [70%]

Another one who's very different from the series. He's sweet and polite, but can be a little intimidating due to being Very Large™. He wouldn't hurt a fly though. He's also very good friends with Gustavo and Noisette, but like Noisette, he's sometimes pressured into being mean or cruel - such as attempting to kill Gus - by the other archangels

Fake Peppino as Shax [85%]

He'll be called Bruno in this. He never met Peppino despite looking like him, and being his replacement after Pep got banned from Hell. When angered, he can get extremely intimidating, but mostly he just doesn't quite understand how humans work. His speech is reversed, and only demons can understand him, but others can learn to understand him if they take the time.

He appears more goopy in Hell, like his in game sprite, and looks like the Nothing Compares guy when on Earth, but still can't speak normally. He either uses sign language when having to talk to humans, or just gestures around. Or he thinks he's doing sign language but actually just says gibberish.

In the end when Noise and Noisette are reunited, he gets promoted to Duke of Hell by Noise, but he doesn't want the position so he gives it to someone else.

Pizzahead as Lucifer; Pizzaface as Satan [99%]

Look. If Satan and Lucifer are the same character, then both are just different forms. In my head at least. Pizzaface is Satan (more demonic, huge, gets destroyed), and Pizzahead is Lucifer (more humanoid, human height, may return later).

While PF is more for intimidation, PH is more for visiting Earth in secret or when having to go through the Hell offices. PF created Fake Peppino and the Peppi clones, nobody knows why he seems to be so obsessed with Peppino that he keeps making demons in his image.

Pepperman as Uriel [89%]

He just really wants to get rid of Gustavo. He may look silly but he can be extremely intimidating, and way stronger than he looks. Selfish as heck. I want him to always wear a feather boa, both in his angel form and in his human form. And also i want him to look a bit androgynous. Genderfluid icon. Idk where his art would come into play but I'll find a way probably. Maybe his art form is fashion. So he's always wearing some kinda extravagant clothes, at least when he's on earth. Plus the feather boa.

Vigilante as Hastur [85%]

Basically looks the same as in game while in Hell, but with horns on his cowboy hat. On Earth he looks like a human cowboy. Idk how else to describe it lol. Even if he didn't like Doise very much, he's still mad at Peppino for killing him. He witnesses the Holy Water™ incident and tells Noise, but Noise doesn't believe him.

Doise as Ligur [95%]

Looks very similar to Noise, but unlike him, Doise isn't a rat, but a raccoon. Him and Vigi didn't really like each other that much, but they still preferred each other's company over anyone else's (especially Noise's). He dies via Holy Water but it's not as straightforward as you'd think (explanation below)

Peddito as the Holy Water [95%]

This secret special liquid is made for angels to kill demons easier. When thrown to the ground, it shapes into a sort of clone of the being who used it, but with hollow eyes, which is supposed to confuse or scare the opponent. It has the same strengths and weaknesses as the original, but without fears or other pesky feelings in the way. Since Peppino throws it, it will turn into a form that resembles himself. The liquid will then chase and kill the first thing it sees, in our case Doise, and then vanish with him. Like, he'll just vaporize or something. Only angels know about this weapon, and it is only used in extreme situations.

Peppiclones as Eric (disposable demon) [100%]

There's just. So many of them. Sometimes they get in a fight and kill each other before someone can give them instructions. Feral. Fake Peppino hates them cause they tend to get on his nerves quickly and rarely listen to him (which is impressive since it takes a lot to make him angry or annoyed)

Brick as the Hellhound [100%]

Brick will start out as a Bad Rat, and will turn into a Stupid Rat once given a name. Yes, she will still be gigantic. But she's the only giant rat, all the others are normal sized. Won't stay with Fungo, i really want her to stay with Gustavo (or at least reunite later on?). I don't care there has to be a reunion between them. Maybe Fungo is going to college and can't keep Brick, and the parents can't provide anymore. Idk. I love Brick i want her and Gus to stay friends

The Toppins as the Them & Warlock [101%]

Mushroom as Adam -> human name Fungo

Cheese as Wensleydale -> human name Gio (short for Formaggio)

Tomato as Brian -> human name Tom

Sausage as Warlock -> human name Saul or Soos

Pineapple as Pepper -> human name Pina

Pizzelle as Maggie [75%]

She's hopelessly in love with Rosette, but way too anxious to talk to her. Actually isn't sure if Rosette is flirting with her or if she's that nice to every customer. Sometimes she says things before thinking about them and regrets it later (she lets the demons into the pizzeria). Keeps thinking she's not good enough for Rosette or that she hates her

Rosette as Nina [75%]

She owns a cafe and bakery. Always has a smile on her face and is sweet to everyone she meets. She did just go through a breakup with her toxic partner, but tries to downplay it by acting like nothing happened. Actually didn't realize her partner was really manipulative and controlling until talking to Pizzelle about it when they're shut in during the power outage. She's not quite ready for a new relationship yet but keeps Pizzelle in mind, they're besties for the time being :)

Pizzano as Mr. Brown [55%]

He's an aspiring actor, but can sometimes be too much in his role, so that he keeps convincing himself that Pizzelle is his arch rival. He makes videos/short films on the internet (i don't wanna say he's an influencer but it goes in that direction). He doesn't quite have a crush on Gustavo, but he enjoys his company a lot more than Peppino would like.

✨ Timeline changes ✨

|| Before the beginning ||

Peppino used to be an archangel, he had bigger wings and hair (sorry Pep). Like Crowley, he created the stars but he used something like an oven for it, or maybe a cauldron. He used to be kinda apathetic towards other angels, and only liked creating stars. But he does eventually talk to Gustavo cause he seems genuinely interested in what he does, and nobody ever showed appreciation towards him or his work. Maurice was already a total asshole to him, which obviously angered Peppino, and then he just let him fall one day, stating that he wasn't behaving like an angel should.

Gustavo was a kinda low tier angel, basically just a messenger for other angels. Nice to every angel he meets in hopes of becoming friends. Unlike Aziraphale, he won't immediately be in love with Peppino at first sight but he talks to him more often than others so he starts feeling attached quicker.

|| In the beginning (4004 BC) ||

Peppino unintentionally made Eve eat the apple cause he bumped into the tree in his animal form and it landed directly in front of her. He's first on the wall cowering cause he feels guilty. Then Gustavo joins him and tries lifting the mood a little bit. He's aware that it was the plan to let the humans out but didn't know how. Tries reassuring Pep that he didn't do anything wrong. His weapon would probably be a flaming spear or lance. Or a big pizza shovel thing idk.

|| Bildad Era (Land of Uz 2500 BC) ||

Peppino won't tempt Gustavo to eat food, he's too worried about him falling. Since he has trauma from the fall he doesn't want Gus to go through the same thing so he tries to keep him from indulging too much. But Gustavo always wanted to try food. He knows that he won't get into too much trouble for eating food so he risks it.

|| Knight time (Wessex 537 AD) ||

Peppino is basically in the knight transformation, while Gustavo looks kinda like he appears on the Bloodsauce Dungeon title card. He's actually the one suggesting the arrangement, and Pep refuses more out of fear.

|| French Revolution (Paris 1793) ||

Peppino is the one getting captured. Idk why yet. Anyway, it's like Pig City where Gus has to break Pep out. That was my whole thought

|| Grand opening (deleted scene 1809) ||

Peppino opens his pizzeria for the first time. Noise, Vigilante and Doise visit him, congratulating him (begrudgingly) on spreading the Great Plague of Marseille (France 1720). They heard that Peppino was in France somewhere in the 1700s, but didn't fact check any further. He has no idea what's going on. They then tell him to look out cause there's an angel on Earth in the same area, and if he sees them he can just kill them anyway (maybe they make fun of him for being easily scared). Noise says that Da Boss (PH) wants him to come back to Hell and work side by side with him for some reason, he's pissed as hell (pun intended this time)

Meanwhile Gustavo wanted to congratulate Pep on the opening. When he sees the other demons, he hides, but listens in on the whole conversation. Is more careful since Vigilante has very good senses, and Pep doesn't notice him either. He then basically does what Crowley does in that scene, but leaves a little gift for Pep with a note that implies that he made the demons leave. Pep continues not knowing what's going on.

|| Holy water park break up (1862) ||

Peppino asks for holy water just in case of emergencies, but Gustavo refuses. He won't get angry at him, but more worried, so he offers Peppino his angel ring. It functions like a sort of communication device, so Gus would always know when Pep is wearing it. He tells him to put it on when he needs help or someone to talk to. Pep gets pissed, not only because he didn't get the holy water, but also cause he thinks Gus is making fun of him cause of the ring (also maybe he gets a bit flustered). He runs off and throws the ring back at him.

|| War (1941) ||

Peppino somehow became not just part of the mafia, but the boss. He doesn't know how that happened. His outfit will be inspired by Evil Pep. While he does have experience with using guns, it makes him anxious. He remembers when he was forced to kill others, and freezes up when he has to hold a gun. Sometimes smokes a cigar for intimidation purposes, but actually hates smoking, and will have a coughing fit. Goes by Mr. Spaghetti.

Instead of books, Gustavo delivers lab rats. He wanted to rescue them but either the Mafia or Mussolini want to test various nuclear weapons or whatever on them. Idk why. He gets so upset when he realizes the rats were killed by the bomb, but Peppino revives them, even though he hates rats, and gives them back to Gus. Gustavo is officially smitten.

|| 1967 ||

Peppino is for some reason still a mafia boss. Still wants holy water and wants his goons to bring it to him, but Gustavo stops him. He brings him a flask of special Holy Water, and tries again with offering his ring. He adds that he should see it as a reminder that he'll always be there for him when he needs him. Peppino accepts the ring this time. Since it's an angel ring it either burns or itches and he'll get a rash from it, so he wears it around a necklace. From this point on Peppino is seen wearing the ring around his neck, and Gustavo will not have one anymore. He also doesn't replace it. Also i thought maybe Gus appears more feminine here but still with a moustache because yes. I haven't figured out the outfit yet but i think this could be neat.

|| Nanny time ||

Peppino becomes a home tutor instead of a nanny. He's generally nervous around children, and doesn't wanna do or say anything wrong to them. He's afraid that he makes them cry or upset cause then he'll start to panic. Just like me fr.

Gustavo will appear feminine, as a personal cook for the family. He'll have old cartoon granny vibes, a dress with a cutesy lacey apron with hearts on it, long hair in a bun, and big cute oven mitts. Kinda like that one Granny Gnome in Gnome Forest.

|| Angel Disguise ||

During the pizzeria invasion, Peppino goes to Heaven with Ziti and disguises as an angel, wearing his white hoodie and cap with sunglasses. He'll try to be as authentic as possible so he also wears the ring Gus gave him and kinda forgets it gives him a rash (and also that Gus now thinks something's wrong). Then basically the same things happen as in the series, but with the addition of a very worried Gustavo.

While looking for the Clue™, Gustavo will wear an outfit that's kinda like a mix between Aziraphale and The G sugary spire. Also he will drive that Vespa, even if he doesn't have a license. He promises Peppino to keep it safe of course.

Okay that was a lot. I'll update this post whenever i change some characters around. Still need to figure out Dagon and Furfur (and some others from S1), plus Gerome and John. Hopefully I'll get these roles and characters figured out soon :)

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Twenty Fanfic Writer Questions

Tagged by @littleblackraincloudofcourse

Tagging @lowkeyed1 @evodevo-geekmonkey @dianels @bisexualshakespeare @spybrarian @blackdalek

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 

7 (3 are WiP)

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 

186,452

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Willow! ...Technically other things too but really it's just Willow with playful skins.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Red Embers: dark alternate future AU, resistance fighters against the Wyrm's tyranny, grim & gritty

Like Constellations, a Million Years Away: sprawling mecha sci-fi AU set in the world of the Lancer tabletop roleplaying game. The Questies all pilot giant mechs; four books (2 done), one focused on each of Jade, Kit, Graydon, and Elora (in that order). Posthumanism, anticolonial to the extent a fanfic can be, utopian, dramatic.

Soft Blazing Crowns: Tanthamoretober one-shot. Modern AU. Elora helps Jade with a sexy photoshoot for a gift for Kit.

Full: (E-rated) Tanthamoretober one-shot. Modern AU. Straight-up smut drabble, 100 words on the dot. Extremely funny to me that this is in the top 5. :P

The Loving Hurt: Canon-set one-shot digging into the violence implied by the canon against the Bone Reavers, Scorpia's backstory, how Jade got her name. Dark, grim, not pleasant to write and in some ways probably not to read TBH. I was in A Mood!

5. Do you respond to comments?

Religiously! Sometimes it takes me a while, but I do.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? 

Hmmm. I mean I think it's gotta be The Loving Hurt. Like I said. Dark. Blame the show's writers, I do. :P

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? 

Gonna resist the temptation to say Full and instead say I think that it'll probably be Flawless Five vol. 1 when it's finished in a few weeks!

8. Do you get hate on fics? 

Not so far!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? 

The only thing I'd consider smut is Full. Otherwise, not anywhere that you can see. ;)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? 

No true crossovers, though Like Constellations is set (loosely) in the Lancer Universe.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so! They're too weird!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? 

No but I'd be so honored.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? 

Nope!

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I am a Tanthamore diehard, what can I say.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? 

If you'd asked me recently I'd probably have said "all of them." Fortunately I'm feeling a little better lately! I hope to finish all of the current ones; Constellations is a slow, weighty project, F5 I hope to have done very shortly, Embers...we'll figure that out after F5.

16. What are your writing strengths? 

I think I'm pretty good at dialogue, and I'm decent though not incredible at humor (especially character-based humor). I'm also a decent mimic - though this can feel a little clunky sometimes, I think I'm able to adjust my voice pretty easily to suit a situation, genre, or style. My unhinged and unpopular fic Excerpts from a new translation... is a pretty good example of that, lol. And on that note: I have a lot of fun with wacky metatextual stuff.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Taking the wacky meta stuff too far; not being bold enough in straying from the established character arcs/plots in canon; I don't think I'm great at writing really juicy interiority. Starting very large projects that will take forever to finish. ':)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? 

I'm comfortable enough in Spanish to write simple dialogue in that language. I've done one line in Latin (which I'm comfortable with since it's functionally a dead language) and made up some words in a conlang for Constellations. Wouldn't try anything via Google Translate though.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Willow! At least if we count conscious fanfiction. If we're going back to the Days of Yore probably Animorphs when I was a wee one.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? 

Difficult to pick...but Like Constellations is the baby, the one I'll finish come hell or high water (I hope). On the other hand, Flawless Five is probably the most fun (to write, and maybe to read if you like that sort of thing) and Red Embers is the one that in many ways I find most exciting. Like I said - hard to choose!