#but he’s okie for now
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Me: I’ll watch one episode of my hero after dinner that’ll be fun :)
Me three episodes later, having gone from crying earlier to just pure distress by the end: Well that was the worst choice ever
#my bf and I are watching ‘together’ by setting weekly episode goals and this week’s goal is three so I’m maxed out#I figured I’d watch one a day after school then it would be close to when he can watch them…#whoops#MHA s6 spoilers in the rest of my tags here:#WHY DID THEY DO THAT TO TWICE????? bro I forgot I liked him and then I was just sobbing when he died oh my word#and then almost hawks too I was like noooo I can’t take this#I’m glad tokoyami got a hero moment but also the kids being in danger causes me distress#uhhh laser guy that mic left with shigaraki was#was dumb as hell#like what was that dude#mirko SAID that he’d wake up with ELECTRICITY and you LEFT HIM IN A PUDDLE NEXT TO SPARKING WIRES?????#dumb bitch deserved to die but the rest of the people around the hospital that didn’t outrun the new power up didn’t!!#I thought they were going to kill mic then he got grabbed but then I thought they were gonna kill Aizawa and I was like NO#NOT HIM TOO YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME#but he’s okie for now#shigaraki’s power up is absurd#my live reaction to the spreading crumbling at first was like Gasp then Oh no characters I care about them Oh wow this is crazy#It’s gotten the whole building! then Okay- okay- woah there- alright now stop that. stop that this is ridiculous. knock that off#like there’s powerscaling the villain to be a bigger threat and there’s absurdity this was absurd#alright thanks for reading my review since I can’t talk to my bf about it till he catches up and I needed to say this somewhere
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Oops 😬
Just some thoughts after watching the movie heheh. Nothing here is a spoiler though! Its mostly just Bowser’s demeanor HAHA
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#mareach#bowser#mario#princess peach#smb#super mario bros#things that give my life joy: when peach asked mario to marry her he probably said some shit like okie-dokie#also bowser not knowing how to impress a girl all the way to adulthood#my art#comic#also im reading bowser with jack blacks voice now and it — kills me (positive)
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captain jasmine "jazz" drake broke into my brain and is now living there rent free help
#i uhm i uhhh i i i#queen too. i was introduced to queen and uh i uhuhm i yeahgh huhuhu#those two get me all giggly kicking my feet yknow#ep91 killed me three times im triple dead can s omeone help im so deep in my riptide fixation istg if i pick up any vocal stims bc of this#istg if i start going lalala. well idk what id do but smth..#just roll with it#jrwi riptide#jrwi jazz#jasmine drake#chip jrwi#jay ferin#gillion tidestrider#i got to their big revamped designs yiippeeee#N JAYS MAGI C WING S IM SO HYPE#my art#oki now i need to learn how to draw queen uhm i was scared for their debut bc i knew i would be insane but yeah ok i nee d to go like i nee#to leave i cant hes literally perfect i cant deal with it im gonna cry i l ove her sm istg theyer evertyhtinnhg
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I had this poet and Magician design sitting around in my gallery so I think it's about time I post them 🧍♀️
#faceee art#garten of banban#Completely out of topic but I think syringeon has officially taken over the blog cause he's the fan favorite#first rub now him#Gotta place the mechanic somewhere next time i post syringeon art.....#oki now back to bittergiggle clones- They're silly
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now we're partners in crime—
gojo x f!reader wc: 4k+ tags: modern au, no smut but it is a mentioned subject throughout, intoxication to the point of slight memory loss (referenced), gojo being gojo, f!reader (referred to as 'wife' and 'bride', etc.) takes place in you guessed it las vegas, so there's some american stuff in here inspired by the katy perry song 'waking up in vegas'
many things are immediately concerning when you wake up.
the first being that you're laid up in a bathtub and not entirely naked, wearing some ridiculously scandalous lingerie you would never buy for yourself while in your right mind — though you think that might be precisely the problem. that you weren't.
you have no recollection of getting into this...outfit, which is little more than too-tight ribbons and misplaced pasties and strips of crotchless, white material. it's so open and exposing that you are horrifyingly embarrassed, hands clumsily rushing to cover the bits of you that are all out even if you are in a hotel bathroom by yourself.
the thought of anyone seeing you in this nonsense nearly has you sinking further down into the tub and turning the faucet on high until the water runs up and over your head, but someone would come to find you eventually, and they would catch just as much of an eyeful as whoever tied you into this crap.
and someone certainly did, because there's no way you could have gotten into this alone, either stone-cold sober or sloshed out of your mind. which you're quite sure you were. had to have been.
there are faint and distorted memories tickling the sensitive skin of your throat, of cherry-stained lips and rushed, slurred whispers. "y'look so sexy," he says, and the little giggle pressed into your neck is innocent, childish compared to the wide hand gripping your ass cheek too hard.
the terribly concerning thing about this isn't that you don't know who that man is, but rather that you do. all too well. and now your head is pounding and your stomach is turning and your hangover is coming in full force at the realization that you may have, in fact, fucked your best friend.
but even that isn't the most concerning thing. no, waking up in a bathtub with few memories of your wild, first night in las vegas has nothing on the glittering, heavy diamond ring on your finger.
you don't know anything about carats but someone — that you hope and pray is not gojo satoru — has bought you a whole crop of them.
it seems as if an eternity passes before you can haul yourself up and over the edge of the tub, though it probably only takes about 10 minutes in total. on all fours, you feel like a little show cow, with fabric everywhere except for where it should be, and you're almost so overcome by your embarrassment that you turn back for the tub.
but there's a faint ringing coming from outside the door. an annoying, too-cheerful noise that you realize is what's woken you up in the first place, because it hasn't stopped for ages. a ring-tone that, again, has your stomach dropping from the familiarity.
maybe it's getou, you try to tell yourself, come to find gojo's phone because the clown ran off without it too late last night and is now panicking. maybe shoko and suguru and satoru are all sober as can be and you've just made a big fool of yourself, all by yourself, and everything is totally fine; you'd happily be labeled a sloppy drunk rather than...whatever it is your brain is trying to piece together right now.
you're not actually any more covered on the ground like this, but it gives you some semblance of comfort as you open the bathroom door and peer out down the hall — which is made of marble flooring and a crumpled-up white, mink rug, gold picture frames lining the pristine white walls. you can see clear across the room, and the floor-to-ceiling windows are all city skyline and a cloudless blue day.
and this is absolutely not the room the four of you booked.
not that it was some backwater, mysteriously-stained-carpet-esque motel room, but it was a bottom-floor rental, and definitely not on the strip, as this king-fucking-suite seems to be. definitely not littered with rose petals and pictures of greek goddesses (?) and a cardboard cut out of elvis presley.
the first piece of real clothing you come across while crawling along the floor is a black blazer that had clearly been tossed into a haphazard clump last night; you hate to imagine why. you yank it on as quickly as your lead-heavy limbs will let you and button it up as far as it will go. a good portion of your chest is exposed, still, but it goes to nearly your knees, because it's fitted for some stupid, tall idiot.
— and said stupid idiot is passed out in the middle of the hotel room, half of one leg kicked up on the couch. there's a sticky, splotchy puddle — of old champagne, you guess, if the empty bottle in his hand is anything to go by — right next to his stupid idiot head, and if he were to only turn his face a little, it'd get all in his hair. you wish it would.
satoru is also entirely shirtless, with the button of his slacks undone and a peek of his black, expensive briefs staring you in the face.
for a moment, you're surprised; all his dumb designer clothes make him seem too slinky, like a limp string-bean, and you didn't expect him to be as...thick as he is. still lean, moreso than even suguru, but there's a soft roundness to his shoulders, which have never looked so wide beneath his fancy shirts.
he has pecs. smooth abs that you want to poke, maybe bite. you're also trying not to care about the snow-white happy trail underneath his belly button.
the first thing you do is whack him in the head.
"gojo!" you hiss, hugging the blazer closer to your body as he whines and, unfortunately, turns further from the mess on the floor. "wake up!"
his glasses are nowhere to be seen, hopefully broken or lost for good, and he only manages to crack a single baby-blue open before covering his face with his hands and groaning out in pain. "did you hit me?" he asks, muffled and delayed, so you do it again to be more clear. "ah!" he cries, "why are you hitting me?"
"b-because! where are my clothes?"
you can see the brush of his light eyelashes against his fingers as his eyes open beneath his hands, and then he's sitting straight up, interested, smile growing at the sight of your bare legs.
gojo has the nerve the laugh, infuriatingly similar to the one haunting your memories. "noooo clue."
"satoru," you grit, and the use of his first name has his face falling into something more serious. "this isn't funny. what—" you hold up your hand and point to the ring on your finger, face burning up when his eyes go wide. "—happened last night?"
but — you know what happened, don't you? because, try as you might to ignore the silky white dress draped across the back of the couch, you're looking into gojo's eyes and you can see them staring back at you underneath the cheap light in some shitty little chapel.
you gasp out loud as your hands go to twist in the roots of your hair, the realization a physical assault on your sanity. "what the fuck have we done?"
a small crease forms between gojo's brows, courtesy of his own hangover headache, and his lips press together evenly as he blinks in the sunshine pouring through the window. he's startlingly less bothered by this than you are and you think it's driving you even more crazy; sitting as if has hasn't just dropped who-knows-how-much on a giant, ugly ring and a suit and this honeymoon-esque-fucking-suite.
the lack of frenzy from him is only driving your anxiety up tenfold.
the annoying little ring-tone splits the air again and that finally prompts him to leave the floor, stumbling around to the kitchen as he knuckles at his eyes. he brightens for a moment and holds up a hand-written note left for you both that says "congrats newlyweds!".
satoru answers the call without a care, voice light and amused. "mr. and mrs. gojo speaking!"
the only very little, teeny-tiny upside to all this is that shoko and getou look just as hungover as you.
ieiri is still laughing, however, into her eggs and then into her mimosa and then fully, into her hands, when you glare at her from across the table. suguru seems unphased for the most part, though you didn't miss how big his eyes got at first sight of the ring on your finger.
there had been no choice but to slip back into the dress you'd worn last night, as it seems the rest of your clothes were in the hotel room where you should've been; gojo at least lets you keep the blazer. most of the buttons on his shirt are gone and you'd both spent too long, too much brain power, trying to figure out how to get it to stay closed before meeting up with getou and shoko in one of the restaurants on the bottom floor of the hotel.
they confirm the worst.
the diagnosis? terminal. 'til death do you part.
"i can't believe you let me do this," you moan, dropping your head to the smooth, cool surface of the table; it doesn't alleviate your headache whatsoever. "why did you let me do this? how could you let me do this to myself?"
"oh, you both were very adamant about it," shoko snorts, downing the rest of her drink in one shot. you don't know how she does it; the very thought of alcohol makes you want to be sick. "wouldn't take no for an answer."
your face falls back into your hands, all doom and gloom. you want to refute such a claim, vehemently disagree that you would want to marry gojo satoru under any circumstances — but there apparently are circumstances that have led you right here. beside gojo, who is drenching a fat stack of pancakes in syrup.
he only grins. "i always knew you found me irresistible."
"look what you've let me do," you cry, digging your hands back in your hair as you send ieiri a pleading look, as if she could go back in time and stop you from ever getting into this mess. "you've let me ruin my life!"
getou sighs, head falling back against the booth you're sitting in. "it can't be that hard to undo. must happen all the time."
gojo chokes at that. "what? you would dare suggest the d-word on our first day as man and wife?"
you smack him again to shut him up, though he only frowns at you, cheeks full of food. "we are undoing this!" you hiss, glaring at your own reflection in the over-sized glasses shoko has let him borrow. "and you're paying for it!"
gojo chooses violence in that moment, by reaching out to catch the attention of the waitress walking by. "excuse me, do you mind getting my bride a cup of coffee? she gets a little grumpy in the morning without her caffeine, you know how it is."
you launch forward in the seat to strangle him, but he's quick to deflect by looping an arm around your shoulders, just before you get your hands on his throat. he yanks you close to his side, hard enough that you feel the phantom pain of his grip on your sore ass, from the night before, and then you catch sight of all the purple hickies just under his collar.
the unshakable reminder has you shrinking back into yourself, unintentionally nestling deeper against his side due to your blazing hot shame. it's mortifying suddenly, to realize it's public knowledge that you've married and screwed your best friend in the same night. maybe even the same hour. and he's seen you in that ridiculous lingerie.
the truth is that you don't know how to take this. you don't know how you feel about this. being married to him, having been bedded by him. you know he's not the reputation he tries so hard to uphold, as some playboy douche-bag; satoru is nothing but a goofball, a bit of a nerd about mathematics while also shouldering a substantial amount of emotional trauma.
you've known him since college, when you and shoko shared that crappy little apartment off-campus and spent too many nights playing beer pong with your only other two idiot friends — who are conveniently sitting in this booth with you.
he's slept in your bed more times than you can count, because he's too stubborn to sleep on the couch, and you were the link between he and getou when they stopped talking for a while. you don't know what the real deal is with megumi and tsumiki, but you've housed them, too; brought their lunch to school and washed their clothes when gojo forgot to pay the water bill, after he decided to stop living off his family's money.
you don't know how you feel being married to him, even if it's only for 24 hours. you don't know how you feel about crossing such an intimate boundary, or how you feel about not remembering any of it.
gojo, on the other hand, seems to feel great about all this, though the look getou gives him across the table doesn't go unnoticed; disappointment, almost. an are-you-serious kind of look.
"i'm never drinking again," you whine, frowning down at the diamond in your lap, sitting bright and sharp on your finger. it's too big for your taste, a bit gaudy, all for show; definitely satoru's style.
"good idea, peach," gojo nods, "let's agree to go sober."
"you didn't even drink that much—"
gojo interrupts suguru by raising a quick hand. "but we all know i'm a lightweight, so it doesn't take much to begin with."
shoko pokes through her phone and you notice the odd way she's angling it, almost like she's just snapped a picture of you and him snug together. you consider kicking her under the table, or throwing her phone in the obnoxious fountain blubbering over by the bathrooms.
she snickers. "i can't wait to tell utahime."
"you will not!" you squeak, suddenly wrenching yourself from gojo's grasp to scooch down to the other end of the booth, as if that could erase the evidence somehow. "we're getting divorced, like, right now!"
gojo — still seems unbothered, which only has your nerves flaring up again. "you know peach," —he pouts when you hiss at him to stop calling you that— "i'd move heaven and earth to make you happy, but unfortunately i can't find my credit card, so you'll have to put a hold on breaking up our family."
"you what?"
"yeah, what?" getou screws his face up, crosses his arms. "who do you think is paying for all your food?"
"suguru," he gasps, scandalized, "you would make the newlyweds pay for—"
"oh my god, get out!" you fuss, reeling your leg back to literally kick gojo's ass out of the seat. "get out, get out now! we're going back to that room and we're not leaving until we find your stupid card!"
"honey," gojo laughs, sweet and light, sending a chill down your spine as he is gladly steered by you. "don't be so forward in front of our friends."
"shut up!"
you re-tear apart the already torn apart hotel room.
there's not much to sort through, which is both good and bad for your pending annulment; helpful, because it means there isn't much in between you and gojo's credit card, but also unfortunate, because you rip the place to shreds and still can't find the stupid thing.
you're met with plenty of other things, though, that only serve to make your body hot and your brain fuzzy.
all the buttons of gojo's shirt, for one, which are scattered in various places across the floor, where they must have flown when one of you ripped it open. there's a ridiculous assortment of chocolates that, at one point, spelled out something —married!; gojo digs into them immediately with an excited little "oh!" as you crawl around on the floor.
whatever it was you woke up in gets shoved in the trash, and you don't even speak about it to satoru.
it eats away at you, though, the flitting images that cycle through your brain, the muddled memories you have of this ridiculous hotel room. the more you look, the more comes back to you, and you eventually can't stop replaying the way he'd thrown your dress up over your head, or the hand you stuck down his pants.
to no surprise at all, gojo isn't really helping. instead lounging on the couch, shoes kicked off, little foil wrappers in his lap. when he notices you staring at him, remembering, he smiles his coy little smile. "c'mon," he starts, "being married to me can't be that bad, can it?"
it's only been a few hours, but it feels like the day has drug on, far too long; you only shake your head, raise a hand and say, "don't."
"i can take care of you," he continues, turning to prop his chin up on the back of the couch as you pace back and forth. "i can—"
"i don't need to be 'taken care of'—"
"—you know what i mean." he has the audacity to roll his eyes at you, but the smile on his face is dimming. "i'll do the cooking and cleaning."
you huff out a laugh. "satoru, you've never cooked anything in your life."
he ignores the diss. "is it because i've got kids? you don't have to be the step-mom—"
"god, stop," you groan, digging the heels of your hands into your eyes. they sting, suddenly, and you tell yourself it's only because of the migraine. "what are you—you can't be serious. why are you—i mean, what the hell?"
the hotel room goes entirely silent, and maybe it's because a phone isn't ringing in the background, but it feels like a completely different room. there's pink and red everything, bouquets to go with the petals littering the floor. the ring around your finger fits just right, but you force it to spin around and around, pinching at your skin because you can't keep your hands still.
satoru's face betrays nothing. you have no idea what he's thinking. why he's going so far, if this is all just another joke of his.
"we didn't, by the way," he tells you then, voice low and calm. "you went to throw up in the bathroom and never came back and i passed out on the floor."
you press your thumb into the center of your forehead, trying to tide back the frustration building in your waterline. "what? what do you mean?"
a small smile returns to his face, bringing about a rosiness with it. "our marriage was never consummated, i mean. we never got that far."
oh.
satoru is your best friend, one of them, and you decide, while looking at his tired eyes and soft smile, that maybe marrying him wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. getou gets on your nerves too much, with his grumpiness, and shoko is too flighty. utahime is maybe ideal, though you think nanami would be a good, safe choice.
and gojo, too. couldn't be too bad of a choice, with him.
you heave a sigh and come around to sit beside him on the couch, slumping back into his side — which was undeniably comfortable, down in the restaurant. the affection makes him hum, warm and happy into the crown of your head.
"every marriage has its ups and downs."
you dare to laugh, finally, at the situation. "i don't think i've been a very good wife."
"that's alright, peach," he yanks away, squirming as you try to pinch him. "i'm willing to try therapy to save this thing."
"you're stupid," you tell him childishly, though he only shrugs in response. "we have to figure this out, gojo. we have to — fix this."
"megumi will be out of the house in two years, if that's really the issue—"
you shake your head with another laugh as you get up to stretch your sore limbs, to rub at the tenderness still lingering in your buttcheek. "oh my god, it's not the kids, gojo!"
he laughs, too, though it sounds a little strained, like it's being forced from the back of his throat. "then what is it?"
"we're—" you shake your head again, at a loss from the seriousness dulling his eyes. "i mean, we've never even—we can't be married. we're—just friends, aren't we?"
there's a tension that hardens his face for a moment, solid enough that you get the feeling he's going to pull away somehow, from you and this conversation — but then it's falling away just as quickly, replaced by a look of exasperation. "we can be whatever you want."
another chill shudders down your spine at his honesty, his decision to be vulnerable, here, right now, with you. you've never been under the impression he had any...romantic feelings for you, and maybe that's been on purpose, out of fear of him and what loving him could mean. what losing him could mean.
"i think," you sigh, turning your attention back to the ring—your ring. "i think i'm going to give this back to you and you can hold onto it, if you want, and maybe give it to me in the future. after you cook me dinner and clean all the dishes."
he frowns, but it isn't too severe, playful once again. "so you're really gonna d-word me?"
"yes, satoru," you nod, unable to stop from smiling when he does, too. "i'm really going to d-word you. you're just gonna have to win me back, i guess."
"oh, challenge," he grins in full at that and rises to his feet, towering over you a bit. completely without ceremony, his hands come up to cup your face, thumbs brushing over the heat that swells in them. "it's good for us to shake things up every now and then, it'll keep our marriage fresh."
"yeah, great, i'm so glad you're so knowledgeable about this,"
"i'd be a perfect husband,"
—and he kisses you. so simply, so suddenly, a small peck to your lips as if it's nothing but natural.
"also," he kisses you again, a little firmer as your eyelashes flutter against his. "my credit card has been in the pocket this whole time."
"what?" you murmur, brain struggling to keep up with whatever he's saying between the press of his mouth to yours. the sharp breath he inhales through his nose is audible, felt against the skin of your cheek, and you almost throw the conversation out the window when he steps in closer to you.
but you yank away from him at the last second, as soon as you feel his lips curving into a smile.
"wait, what the hell?" you dig around in the pocket of the blazer only to find his little metal card, sitting there and waiting to be found. this time, he accepts the smack, because he knows he deserves it. "gojo!"
"what do they say? 'what happens in vegas, stays in vegas'?" he cups your face again, but it's only to squish your cheeks together to silence you, to smush your frown. "well, we don't leave for another two days, so i don't think you need to rush into tearing my heart into shreds."
you mean to tell him to shut up, but he doesn't let you, and you decide not to fight him on it this time.
—because you are working on your marriage, after all.
you're in the bathroom, washing your hands up after crawling around on the floor, when you feel another painful throb in your asscheek. only — it's less of a throb, really, and more of a stinging. almost like you have a scrape of some kind.
from out in the room, satoru laughs, cackles, wholly elated.
"hey peach, you're never gonna guess what's tattooed on my butt!"
#GET UP AND SHAKE THE GLITTER OFF YOUR CLOTHES NOW#THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR WAKING UP IN VEGAS#i know the lyric is 'don't CALL your mother 'cause—' but i just thought it looked cute he he#okie have this byeeeeee#STILL INSECURE OF MY CHARACTERIZATION OF HIM BYE GOODBYE BURYING MYSELF ALIVE OFHHSGG#the mortifying ordeal of having to tag#gojo x reader#gojo x female reader#× gojo ×#× willow writes ×
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In order to fully understand why it was so hard for Mike to express how deeply he loves El, and why his speech at the end of season 4 was one of the biggest, most important moments for his entire character, we need to look at not just who Mike is as a person, but also everything that has happened since he met her.
Every single time he opens up his heart to her, something horrible happens to her or she's taken away from him almost immediately afterwards.
1x08; he's an awkward little ball of feelings that are way too big for a boy so young. He makes a nervous attempt at confessing and asking her out on a date; when he can't find words that she'll understand, swoops in for a kiss instead. She lights up immediately and smiles. It's a brief moment of hope and pure happiness. Maybe they can have some semblance of a normal life and be normal kids after this is all over.
Minutes later, all hell breaks loose-- they're almost shot, El pushes herself too far until she can barely move, she's almost taken away by the Bad Men, the Demogorgon appears, and she uses the very last of her strength to sacrifice herself to save him and their friends.
He has to watch helplessly as she disappears.
He spends a year caught between believing she's dead and hoping she's still out there somewhere (but if she is alive then why won't she talk to him anymore...?). Kept silent under threat by the lab, he can't confide in anyone or even acknowledge her existence, not with anyone except those involved... but everyone else is keen on moving on and pretending it never happened. He can find some solidarity in Will, at least, who is in a similar kind of emotional turmoil... but it's not the same and it's not enough.
2x9; he is finally reunited with El, and she runs into his arms like she missed him too. She tells him that all those nights he called out to her, she heard him; she was there reciprocating his feelings the whole time.
In a burst of emotions that he's been forced to suppress for an entire year, he lashes out at the reason they've been kept apart (Hopper), screaming and sobbing. It's a massive catharsis for him, and for once an adult is understanding enough to hold him and not punish him for it.
Minutes later, she is going to go headfirst into a pit of monsters, the place where Mike had just firsthand witnessed dozens of people (if not more) get ripped to shreds only hours earlier, and she is going to attempt to close the Gate-- a feat that he knows may take every ounce of her power, just like last time. He cries. He can't lose her again. She promises he won't, and before she can seal that promise with a kiss, they're pulled apart again.
He has to watch helplessly as she drives away.
3x1; all seems to be okay now. He and El are happily together, and he feels comfortable enough to be playful, romantic, and intimate with her. It's the most emotionally open we've ever seen Mike thus far.
For reasons he can't understand (bc there's no way Hopper explained himself beyond "I'm in charge so do as I say or else"), Hopper is angry about it and threatens to never allow him to see her again: the one thing he fears most.
He panics big time and fucks it up in the process by lying to her. During a frantic attempt to apologize while also abiding by Hopper's rules, he runs into her at the mall. He panics again-- if anyone finds her here, and knows that he was here too, it's all over, and Hopper surely won't hear reason. El dumps him cold on the spot, spurred on by Max and her rebellious attitude (and without any context of course). He isn't given much opportunity to respond. He knows he's in the wrong for lying to her, so what could he even say...?
He has to watch helplessly as she drives away.
It's a hard blow, and he retreats back into himself, unable to get any joy out of playing D&D (which he clearly hasn't lost interest in), back to the deadpan sarcasm and accidentally snapping a little too harshly at anyone whom he feels would take El's place.
3x6; no one seems to understand the danger El is putting herself in. Everyone is berating him for worrying about her safety. He's seen firsthand what these monsters do to people, he's seen firsthand how El pushes her abilities too far. No one is listening.
The words "I love her and I can't lose her again" burst out in his desperation, perhaps before he's even had a chance to realize how deep those feelings run, despite whatever protective walls he's tried to build around his heart to keep it from getting broken again.
Soon after, all hell breaks loose. El is nearly killed several times over, her leg is ripped open, she pushes herself so hard that she breaks herself and loses her powers completely. Her father is taken from her. She's shattered by all of this, and there's absolutely nothing he could do or say to make it better.
She tells him that when he admitted he loves her, she heard him, and indeed she loves him, too... But now she's leaving.
He has to watch helplessly as she drives away.
4x1; they've been apart for a few months, and write letters back and forth to each other. El's letters paint a picture of an ideal new life: she and the Byers family are doing well; she's starting school and it's going well; she's made new friends, she likes her new home, everything is going well. She seems to be thriving. She sounds happy, maybe even happier than she had been living in Hawkins. Maybe Max was right, maybe she's better off being her own person without him, and maybe the respectful thing to do is step back... It's a small insecurity that creeps up subconsciously. In his replies he holds back, afraid of clinging too hard.
Though there's little logic in it, he's afraid that if he tells her he loves her again, another disaster might strike and this lovely happy life she's finally found might get taken from her. After all, that's what always seems to happen when he does.
4x2; after months of waiting, they can finally see each other again. He wears her favorite colors, picks a handful of flowers for her, and falls happily back into step with how they used to be. Soon that same day, however, reality becomes clear and the facade crumbles. People he was told were her friends show up to torment and publicly humiliate her. She had been lying. She isn't happy here, she hasn't healed, she is right at the edge of a breaking point that he doesn't see coming at all. He can't believe she would lie to him, she's not the kind of person to lie... especially not about something like bullying, something that she was always so understanding about with him.
On that logicless subconscious level, he wonders if it's all his fault-- he should have known somehow, he should have been there for her. She protected him from his bullies, he should have protected her from hers. He tries to come to her rescue. She runs away from him.
He's helpless to save her, again.
4x3; after a night to process everything that happened-- and deciding that the betrayal he feels from her lying to him is nothing compared to the turmoil she must be going through right now-- Mike approaches her in the gentlest way possible, wanting to listen and trying to understand. El, however, isn't receptive at all to his attempts at reassurance. She is at an all-time low, she's given up. She believes she is unlovable, irredeemable, a monster, just a thing that doesn't even have those superhuman abilities to compensate anymore. Mike can't believe what he's hearing-- doesn't she know that she's always been so much more than her powers? She's always been so much more than what she lacks in quote-unquote "normalcy"... None of those things matter, they have absolutely no bearing on whether she's worthy of being loved, because he loves her, completely regardless of any of these things. He always has...
El starts flinging his restrained words back at him, the products of his insecurity and trauma-induced fear. That fear takes hold yet again, and he stumbles, afraid of saying too much or not enough, because surely both could result in pushing her away-- she's retreating, hearing none of it; nothing he tries to say consoles her.
Moments later, local police come knocking. She's taken away in cuffs, and she's so broken inside that she won't even look at him when he chases the police car down the street and promises he'll get her out somehow...
Once again, he has to watch helplessly as she drives away.
4x8/4x9; after days of driving through the heat and dryness of southwest desert, having narrowly escaped being shot at with military-grade assault rifles, witnessing the death of and burying a man whose last words were that El is in danger... After watching dozens of people get mowed down by a sniper in a helicopter, and watching that same helicopter be smashed into the ground in a ball of flames...
There she is. Just as powerful and beautiful and alive as she's ever been. When he runs to her and embraces her, she looks at him like she can't believe he's real. She's beaming a smile right from her soul and it's like all the insecurity and self-doubt that have plagued them both just vanish from existence now that they're in each other's arms again.
Like always, however, the universe comes crashing down soon after. Max is marked for a gruesome death and all of Hawkins is in danger. They're miles away and helpless, and the only possible way for El to save everyone is if she goes in alone. She's stronger than ever, but so is her foe. Once again, she descends to face all the demons of hell on her own, and Mike can't do anything.
She's losing. She's choking. She's dying. He's helpless.
He must be cursed. He must be. Being with her, loving her, allowing himself to admit he loves her, it always brings only pain and suffering and loss. His heart is so full that it's aching, it's bursting out of his chest, and he can't contain it any longer.
She's going to die and it's going to be all his fault, because he fell in love, and it's cursed her.
Just before it all crumbles into utter despair, the earnest support from his oldest and dearest friend-- one who's always shared and understood his feelings of helplessness-- sparks a light of hope in him: "You're the Heart." You're not helpless. You can save her.
The words that come spilling out of Mike's mouth are truer than any he's ever dared to speak before, and it's the most terrified he's ever been, but he has enough courage for this moment. Despite all of the fears that have been building, stifling, choking him to death for years-- fears that the light of his life will inevitably disappear again, and there's nothing he can do to stop it-- despite it all, he pours out his heart to her.
He loves her. He's always loved her. He loves everything she ever was, is, and could be. He can't imagine a world without her in it. She saved him, in every way a person can be saved. And he needs her to live. He believes in her.
And it works. It's music to her ears.
#stranger things#mileven#mike x el#mike wheeler#mine#mileven fuels my soul#'you can only have 30 photos at a time in one post' alright fuck you tumblr#had to collage the first set to fit everything in lol#but ohhh godddd i am so emotional about this dude#he doesnt struggle to say it because he has doubts. its not about whether or not he has feelings for her.#it is 100000% his own personal struggle with himself and his traumas#grabbing screenshots for that last scene though. GOD i was in tears AGAIN#SOMEBODY give Finn every goddamn award under the sun for that performance#the way his VOICE BREAKS!! he sounds so SCARED and VULNERABLE but also so COMPLETELY EARNEST#'i don't know how to live without you' in particular#i will never get over this ever in my whole life tbh#it was so beautiful#also i need there to be more discussion about the parallels between mike's and hopper's internal struggles#because it is almost exactly the same.#the black hole analogy... 'they didnt need me. i needed them. i'm not cursed I am the curse'#like... biggest of ouches#okie dokie ive spat my bars and dropped the mic now its time for B E D#edit days later: i very much regret not brightening the images. goddamn its dark af here
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thinking about how my oc and shadow milk cookie (before his fall) would first end up meeting.
this ended up turning out as a small fic??? Oh! And shadow milk cookie will be called light milk cookie in this :)
Also here's how I see Shadow Milk Cookie's design! Follow this artist, I'm begging ya'll 🙏💖
Clam Cookie fell sick to a mysterious illness in her early adult years. Her parents called for the best doctors/healers near them, but no one could figure out a cure. Both being desperate, not wanting their only beloved daughter to die, eventually sought the help of one of the five great cookies, the virtue of knowledge, Light Milk Cookie.
Light Milk Cookie agreed to find a cure, feeling compassion for her parents and for her. Sadly, with how far away his kingdom was from her home, he had to take her with him. So, with hushed goodbyes and tears in their eyes, the two parents watched as the carriage carried their daughter to a faraway kingdom.
And so, the great hero worked day and night to find a cure for the young lady. Thanks to her parents, he found out about the herbs and medicines the other doctors had tried on using. With this information, he would mix or replace specific ingredients for each medicine he would make. One particular medicine he made ended up showing some effect, but it still wasn't enough to cure her fully.
Then he had an idea. An absolute ambitious idea.
Perhaps, with some of his soul jam's essence and a mixture of the medicine, perhaps that could be the cure to her illness? Wasting no time, he hurried on making the new version. Once finished and given to her, he waited to see any changes.
As days went by, signs of the medicine healing her gained his attention. The new version was fully curing her! Relief and fatigue filled his entire body. He had gone a few nights and days without sleeping. At last, all his hard work had come to fruition.
Opening her eyes for the first time, Clam Cookie weakly sat up from bed. Groaning at the uncomfortable feeling of her dry throat, she looked around and noticed a glass of water on the desk next to her. Quickly taking it and gulping the refreshing liquid down, she took in her surroundings.
The colors of purple, blue, and white filled the room she was in. Shelves filled to the brim with books, tapestries dedicated to five certain cookies hung on the walls, and the desk near her had a few scrolls laying upon it.
She jumped at the sound of the door opening. She felt her heart race and her face turning warm as the most beautiful cookie she's ever seen in her life walked into the room. His entire look screamed of a sophisticated scholar. However, she knew he was far more than that as she took in more of his features. What took her attention the most was his hair. It flowed constantly, like that of an endless stream.
Next were his eyes. The dark bags underneath them from the lack of sleep were noticeable to her, but even so, they shined like that of two beautiful sapphires being held up in the sunlight.
Light Milk Cookie stood frozen in place. The look of surprise was written all over his face. This was the first time he had seen her eyes, and by the witches, they were absolutely mesmerizing!
Her eyes were the darkest blue, like that of the deep blue ocean. Her long, unkempt hair, which hung loosely behind her back in waves, only made her even more beautiful.
Both were at a loss of words. Neither one of them was able to speak as they studied each other. Clearing her throat, she finally spoke, "W-who are you? Where am I?" Snapping out of his trance, Light Milk Cookie gave her a gentle smile before closing the door.
"Please, have no fear, Clam Cookie. I only came in to check on you." He proceeded to walk closer to her, but stopped once he noticed her flinch. He raised up both his hands, signaling to her that he meant no harm.
"I only want to check if you still have a fever," he spoke softly at her. His tone easily taking away any tension she may have had of him.
"You've been sick for many weeks. This is the first time I've seen you fully awake." Now standing next to her, he gently placed a cool hand on her forehead. He paid no mind to her gasp, only taking note of her fever no longer there.
Humming in approval, he took his hand off and stepped back. With a wave of his hand, he summoned a scroll and a feathered quill pen, jotting down notes of her improved condition.
Clam Cookie looked at the display of magic in awe, her eyes shining as she watched the handsome scholar write.
"I will have to inform your parents about this, but you'll have to stay with me for just a few more days. I need to make sure the symptoms don't return." Looking back at her, he covered his mouth, chuckling at her reaction.
"I'm going to assume you've never seen magic before, yes?"
Clam Cookie shook her head, confirming his question. "I-I've only heard tales and stories of cookies being able to wield magic. I knew they were true, but to actually see it happen in front of me…" Light Milk Cookie couldn't help but blush as her eyes sparkled up at him with absolute admiration.
".. It's absolutely breathtaking."
One would assume her words were aimed directly at his display of magic, but with the way she gazed at him with those eyes, he knew those words were meant for him.
Clearing his throat, he set the scroll and quill down on the desk before turning his attention back to her. He gave her a bow, surprising her from the action.
"Forgive me, Clam Cookie. I haven't fully introduced myself. My name is Light Milk Cookie." he raised his head, gracing her with a charming smile that made her heart skip a beat.
"Though, you may also know me as one of the Five Great Heroes. The Virtue of Knowledge himself."
#OKIE DOKIE#i'll make a part two so this wouldn't be too long :']#these two have been circling my mind for about a month now#they're so in love even after shadow milk cookie's corruption#the other beasts assumed shadow milk cookie mind controlled her after they reunite#the guy absolutely refuses to and finds the idea absolutely disgusting#if he were to do that to her then everything about her would be stripped away#she would be a completely different person and he doesn't want#THEIR LOVE IS SO ANGSTY HELP MEEEE#cookie run kingdom#cookie run#shadow milk cookie#clam cookie#oc x canon#fanfiction#cr kingdom#crk fanfic#my writing
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Happy halloween!!! Aimed and fired mainly towards >> @choliosus for the @mcyt-halloween gift exchange, but happy to everyone else too :DD
#despertelty crawled to the deadline while getting nerffed by my body#happy halloween!!!#quackity#technoblade#man i havent drawn him in enough time augh#also if its not obvious its a vampire au!! set in..some time i guess?#i realised halfway into this event that ia m not good at cool outfits so sorry bout that :D#also quackit i almost never draw so hope hes fine?#quackities great:))#anyhow yup yup hallowen!!#im gonna go pass out :D#song for today is forewords by tylor the creator#oki oki now im done#mcyt#also ahem uh for anyone who followed me for techno uuuuhh been awwhilllleee great to seee youuuu chough hough#and for anyone else uh go sub to technoblade!!#and quackity hes so cool :DD
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#Steven bap your own fluffy bangs.#Okay last connverse-related (but more Connie-focused this time) doodle for the day. 😅#She's studying for colleg#College girl Connie#Maybe he can bargain. Five baps for one heal to feel refreshed again.#I don't know why but Connie suddenly showing up with bangs in the show made me think of a 'boy next door' look. lmao#I'm like. Do they looks like that? But my brain is telling me yup pretty much. So I just blindly agreed.#Well it do be like that sometimes. Sometimes you just don't know why your brain tell you something kinda sus.#Oki she get frizzy hair sumtimes that's my headcanon now#connverse#Steven Quartz Universe#Connie Maheswaran#skedoobles#Ngl I like it more if the animators kept Connie's bangs matted than fluffy. But also ngl I do kinda think making it fluffy is easier.#my shiz
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:shitty wii remote Gabriel voice: NOOO, DONT TURN ME INTO A MARKETABLE PLUSHIE!!!!!
(Gift for @mipexch !!)
#clover draws#??#Gabriel ultrakill#ultrakill#oky it’s Ninight time lol. goodbed#for as goofy as he is I love him dearly and he’s s in good hands now where he will definitely not be thrown at the walls even once
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I like the idea that Ivan originally had a different name before he got captured and put into the system to be adopted, or before Unsha chose ‘Ivan’ to be his name.
He isn’t able to remember what it was, however (actually, he doesn’t remember a lot of what happened when he was on the street; his memories of that time looking as if they were trapped behind thick, frosted glass). But he’s certain that someone did give him a name at some point, specifically another human. A parent he can’t imagine? Or maybe just an older person who stayed with him until he could fend for himself, someone who he doesn’t recall? It wouldn’t have been hard for him to have lost his original name, given that there wouldn’t be any other human with whom he would have stayed long enough with for it to be of use, always opting to just call him “boy” or "child.”
Ivan is used to feeling as if his humanity is only ever able to be drawn out by other people, as though he isn’t able to do it himself, and as though the fact that he is of the human race isn’t enough of a qualifier. So he can’t help but feel guilty; why didn’t he try holding onto that facet of himself even if it was something that no one would ever call him? A name that may have been given to him out of genuine compassion—how could he have just thrown it away?
Ivan can be a sentimental person, so I think the idea that he lost a piece of himself when he already feels so fractured as a human would have him in a silent upset, at least for a little bit.
#alien stage#alnst#alnst ivan#Headcanon that I've had in my head for a while. may it be free now#Maybe at some point he asks Till what name he thinks he would have if his name wasn't Ivan and Till thinks he's just messing around#So he gives Ivan whatever name comes to mind first without any real thought and Ivan's like “okie dokie! 😁”
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It is done. The third anniversary drawing. I would have gotten it done in time for the actual anniversary had I not. Gotten sick earlier this May and then not wait until the literal, actual 19th to start this drawing, but anyway-
Yee! I made it a... more sad drawing than I usually do them lol. It just... really didn't feel right to have them being all happy and smiling after I ended the last chapter how I did. Of course, I realize the irony of saying that and then literally writing "Happy 3rd Anniversary" on the drawing smh
Here's one without the text and then one where I tried to put a little filter on it! The filter didn't work out as well as I wanted and was sort of finicky, so I didn't include it as the first picture in the post lmao
I experimented with the grass and everything! It was really kind of tedious, but I like how it turned out lol. I also tried a different texture with shading a lil bit. It's also my first time drawing a night sky! :D I hope it turned out kinda well. It was fun! I will have to try it more in the future.
#undertale au#ink sans#error sans#perseverance!au#errorink#I started this on like the 19th#Then drew a little for the 21 but didn't touch it at all for the 22#Then b o o m; the 23 came around and I still wasn't done#Not to worry; I got it done now#Y e e; it's a sadder drawing than normal but it's because of how the last chapter ended#Error's just so tired man#Ink's kinda worried 'cus he wants to say something comforting but doesn't know what#Daisy's just there feeling the uncomfortable feelings of both of them#But e e e y; it okie. It fine. They're stargazing! :D It's all okay-
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4 other applicants have come in clutch for the apartment I'm hunting. If I'm still eligible I'll know tomorrow, but only to be called for a showing, if the others in the queue accept and have better conditions than me, I'll lose it. But my agent is still hopeful. Fingers crossed.
#its not the end of the world if i lose it -- ill just lose time and have to search for another one. i really don't want that but yk.#shit never works out precisely how you want them to#i spoke to my brothers and another kinda viable option is to move to spain for a while and he will drive me and nana#i wouldn't mind but jesus. the hassle. but at least it's warm 💀#oki back to writing my concept slice of a hg called 'the healers hands' but I'll post about it tomorrow huhuhu#i have a few concepts that might turn into a game and some smut baking in the back of my mind as that is what is winning the poll#but i have to be honest. smut is so hard to write rn with everything... don't want to say exactly but#it's just a sensitive topic lmao. ill push through but right now im enjoying writing some cozier flirting instead. some tension. i love it.#hope you're doing well#also anon on smut commissions i will get back to you! hope you see this 💀 im just gonna decide what my main project will be and then!!
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more Artfight stuff, man i'm so freaking happy that i can finally draw humans without them looking like complete ✨g a r b a g e✨
(also woah. almost a week till Artfight starts. first year so i'm kinda nervous 👀💧)
#my son. my beautiful son that got compared to Mr. Antonblast once and GOD NOW I CAN'T UNSEE IT GODDAMMIT-#I DESIGNED HIM BEFORE HE EXISTED I SWEEEEAAAR 😭#also. heyo. please look at my Artfight because i wanna draw for as many people as possible this year okie thanks 👉👈#my art#oc art#exciting Eyhm cameo. guess that means i gotta tag her wheeeeee#eyhm stuff
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okay but howl and gojo are the same person in different catergories am i right or i right
#had a revelation#reread the books and ohhh boy i forgot how much i loved book howl and his slithering ways#‘his heart is really quite soft’ STOP#he’s actually sooo fascinating? i dont get why people are so against him#and i lovee the movie but book sophie is so special to me#cause she’s just as flawed a charchter as howl is!! if howl is dramatic and vein then sophie is reckless and quick tempered#i think their egos are equally matched tbh#and gojo!! him and howl as the childish but rlly very competent and powerfull teacher#who does their best to hide their vulnerability from others#howl pendragon#howls moving castle#studio ghibli#gojo satoru#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#i think they tend to have similar approaches yk#i’d throw in dazai but i think he’s a little too far to the left for this one#also dare i say… koro-sensei from assasination classroom?#oky but the parallels between gojo and koro-sensei go so hard now that im thinking abt it…#powerfull beings considered nonhuman by others… betrayed by someone they dearly trusted… dead love interest… turning dangerous situations#into a learning environment… considered geniuses/the best in their field…#also: they’re both dead so
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my name is stringless oki dementia raven way and i have long ebony black hair (that's how i got my name) that reaches my shoulders and icy red eyes like limpid blood and a lot of people tell me i look like the vampire armand (AN: if u don't know who he is get da hell out of here!) i'm not related to uncle raven but i wish i was because he's a major fucking hottie. i'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. i have pale white skin. i'm also a space vampire, and i go to a space planet called rhazzishouse where i'm the demon they worship (i'm ???). i'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and i wear mostly black. i love hot topic and i buy all my clothes from there. for example today i was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, a red bowtie and black combat boots. i was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. i was walking in my temple. we are in space so there was no sun, which i was very happy about. skyler stared at me. i put up my middle finger at him.
#yes#shaperaverse#the black beyond#the puppetshade chronicles#stringless oki#the armand thing only applies to the way i draw him hinestly lmao#hes been mistaken for him .So many times (like two)#AND NOW ARMAND IN THE SHOW ALSO HAS THE RED TINTED GLASSES???? the thing i always draw oki with???#insane. insane
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