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sarahreesbrennan · 11 months ago

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Are all the themes in “in other lands” supposed to be a commentary on something? Or do you just like writing sex scenes between minors, age gaps, and reverse misogyny?

Genuine question.

Ohhh, my dear anon, I don't believe this is a genuine question.

But it does bring up something I've been meaning to talk about. So I'll take the bait.

Firstly. Yes, my work contains a commentary on the world around us. I wonder what I could be doing with the child soldiers being sexually active in their teens (people hook up right after battles), and the age gap relationship ending in the younger one being too mature for the elder. What could I possibly have been attempting when I said 'how absurd gender roles are, when projected onto people we haven't been accustomed by our own society to see that way'? I wasn't being subtle, that's for sure.

Secondly. Yes I do enjoy writing! I think I should, it's my life's work. Am I titillated by my own writing, no - though I think it's fine to be. The sex scenes of In Other Lands aren't especially titillating, to be honest. It is interesting to me how often people sneer at women for writing romance and sex scenes, having 'book boyfriends,' insinuating women writers fancy their own characters. Women having too much immoral fun! Whereas men clearly write about sex for high literary purposes.

… I have to say from my experience of women and men's writing, I haven't found that to be true.

I’m not in this to have an internet argument. Mostly people use bad faith takes to poke at others from the other side of a screen for kicks. But I do know some truly internalise the attitude that writing certain things is wrong, that anyone who makes mistakes must be shunned as impure, and that is a deeply Victorian and restrictive attitude that guarantees unhappiness.

I've become increasingly troubled by the very binary and extreme ways of thinking I see arising on the internet. They come naturally from people being in echo chambers, becoming hostile to differing opinions, and the age-old conundrum of wanting to be good, fearing you aren't, and making the futile effort to be free of sin. It makes me think of Tennyson, who when travelling through Ireland at the time of the Great Famine, said nobody should talk about the 'Irish distress' to him and insisted the window shades of his carriage be shut as he went from castle to castle. So he wouldn't see the bodies. But that didn't make the bodies cease to be.

In Les Mis, Victor Hugo explores why someone might steal, what that means about them and their circumstances, and who they might be - and explores why someone else is made terribly unhappy, and endangers others, through their own too rigid adherence to judgement and condemnation without pity. The story understands both Jean Valjean the thief and Javert the policeman. Javert’s way of thinking is the one that inevitably leads to tragedy.

Depiction isn't endorsement. Depiction is discussion.

Many of my loved ones have had widely varying relationships to and experience of sex (including 'none'). They've felt all different types of ways about it. If writing about them is not permissible, I close them out. I'd much rather a dialogue be open than closed.

I do understand the urge to write what seems right to others. I've been brain-poisoned that way myself. I used to worry so much about my female characters doing the wrong things, because then they'd be justly hated! Then I noted which of my writer friends had people love their female characters the most - and it was the one who wrote their female characters as screwing up massively, making rash and sometimes wrong decisions. Who wrote them as people. Because that's what people do. That's what feels true to readers.

I want my characters to feel true to readers. I want my characters to react in messy ways to imperfect situations. I love fantasy, I love wild action and I love deep thought, and I want to engage. That's what In Other Lands is about. That's even more what Long Live Evil is about. That sexy lady who sashays in to have sexy sex with the hero - what is her deal? Someone who tricks and lies to others - why are they doing that, how did they get so skilled at it? What makes one person cruelly judgemental, and another ignore all boundaries? What makes Carmen Maria Machado describe ‘fictional queer villains’ as ‘by far the most interesting characters’? What irritates people about women having a great time? What attracts us to power, to fiction, and to transgression?

I don’t know the answers to all those questions, but I know I want to explore them. And I know one more thing.

If the moral thing to do is shut people out and shut people up? Count me among the villains.

#bookblr #discourse #in other lands #long live evil #les mis #carmen maria machado #writing

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anxiousnerdwritings · 1 year ago

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I am going FERAL over this imagine:

So basically Bruce brings reader home to be his new daughter/the boys' new sibling but Uh Oh! They now want you carnally and reader is just like "you said you wanted me as a daughter/sibling, wtf is this" and being their platonic darling is better than being shared between them romantically so reader tries to come off as innocent and child/sibling coded by being like "yeah I've never actually kissed or dated anyone before aren't I just so innocent" and the boys are like :)))

So then Dick says you can call him your boyfriend "just to feel it out" and Tim starts blatantly stealing your panties and Jason says he can give you your 1st kiss so you can "practice" with him and Bruce offers to teach you how to touch yourself and (and him) and when you try to walk it back cause the boys are being Freaks they're in their delulu era so eventually you end up tied to the bed with the boys and Bruce drawing straws over who gets to take what 1sts (like 1st date, kiss, virginity, ect).

And Damien is just in the background absolutely SEETHING cause the the boys and Bruce's Horny Time keeps interrupting his Mommy Time with the reader

And reader using Damien as kind of a shield cause what are they going to do, feel you up in front of a CHILD? Like just, "Stay Platonic :))"

Just that kind of pseudo incest makes me Feel Things (*/∀＼*)(///∇///)

I'd love your thoughts/a fic based on this! Ty ❤️

TW: Brief mentions of pseudo incest(y) scenarios/behavior, manipulative tactics, yandere tendencies

(Okay so I’ll answer this with my thoughts for right now.)

I know I primarily write incest(y) related topics for my Game of Thrones/ASOIAF stuff but I have been tempted to/curious about branching it out into some of the other fandoms I write for 👀. (I’ve had a few ideas rolling around in my noggin for a bit if anyone is interested.) So I would be willing to give this a try. I’m down to experiment with some new stuff, within reason of course.

I imagine the Reader being older (probably 19-23), maybe even having been a runaway of sorts or not having a very stable home life, so when they’re given the ‘offer’ to become part of the family they’re looking to fulfill a familial void they’ve never experienced or have forgotten how it’s felt like. I definitely see Bruce and the rest of the boys keeping a very close eye on the Reader before they decide to finally bring them into their family, basically full on stalking them from the moment they caught their attention (you know how the Batfam works). It wouldn’t be a surprise if even before the Reader was with them physically that the boys developed a more carnal desire for them. At first, their intentions were completely platonic, but with all the lengthy observing and information gathering of their supposed-to-be-new-family-member eventually something changed in how they all saw their darling.

I really see the change in their obsession starting with either Dick or Tim first. Especially regarding some accidental or purposeful peeping Tom foolery. I feel like Bruce would be the last to fall victim to the change in direction or at the very least he’s the last one to admit to it. If Damian is younger than I see his obsession staying strictly platonic, but if he were much older than I could see him involving himself to the same depths as his family.

At first, I see things happening subtly. Knowing that at the very least a few of them are already in an obsessive-romantic headspace in regards to their darling before they even physically become part of the family the guys would try to be as welcoming as possible without revealing their true intentions. They don’t want to scare you off right away, they want you to walk into it semi-willingly at least. But the interactions with the Reader would show something else. The lingering touches, the being much closer to you than really necessary, the heated grazes over your clothes here and there that leave you wondering if that actually happened or not. I also kind of like the other members not being fully aware of each other’s change in obsession, everyone giving each other the side eye until it sets in and then all out war of who gets the darling to themself unfolds only to eventually end up with them working together and agreeing to share. That’s when Bruce’s heel-turn is revealed.

Once things get truly amped up, the interactions with the Reader really begin to escalate. The boys would walk around shirtless more often, all of them trying to get their darling to look at them, to really look at them. Eventually, it’s not just them being shitless but either them in nothing but their underwear or nothing at all. They start out as accidents but eventually it’s pretty loud and clear that the guys want you to see them, all of them, to even touch them and feel them to your hearts content. But thats not all, of course it’s not. The touching of their darling only gets all the more intense, to the point that you know damn well that they’re touching you and they want to leave you wanting for more. So much more. The Reader’s innocence and lack of experience would only spur them on even more. They absolutely thrive off of it. They all want to be your first, your first everything. There will be a lot of secret ‘lessons’ being given behind closed doors and telling of “Don’t tell Batdaddy or he’ll get real mad.” “Don’t let Jay know, or he’ll want to punish you for not doing this with him.” “Let this be our secret, (Name). Something just for you and me.” “Can’t tell anyone about this or they’ll ruin it for the both of us.” And they only get even worse from there.

I can’t see Alfred being okay with this in any situation, whatsoever. I think he especially would feel like Bruce and the other boys completely took advantage of the Reader and he would try his best to aid them in trying to keep up with the platonic intention of this entire fiasco. He would be a total cockblock, even going as far as helping Damian in his cockblocking endeavors. Alfred’s intention would be to play both sides so he knows how to help the Reader when it comes to Bruce and the others but it wouldn’t take too long for them to figure out that Alfred is working against them. Like, Alfred was all for the familial-platonic obsession but when things started getting more romantic he was ready to shut that shit down ASAP. You can’t tell me he hasn’t, at least a few times, locked Bruce, Dick, Jason, and Tim out of the house to give the Reader some peace and give Damian his much deserved allotted time with them.

Speaking of Damian, he is a menace (as per usual) but even more so than normal. He really doesn’t take too well to the new direction of his father’s and brothers’ obsession for the Reader. He thinks it’s pretty messed up but he sincerely likes and cares about the Reader and he wants them to stay, he wants them to continue being a part of the family forever so he’ll let some things slide. Some. He even may be willing to look the other way when it eventually comes to Bruce, Dick, Jason, and Tim baby-trapping the Reader if it means this whole ‘family’ thing becomes set in stone with the arrival of a new ‘sibling’. But for the most part, at least early on, Damian would be a huge pain in the ass for the other family members. He feels like he needs to step in to save his darling from the others and their ulterior motives. He’s all his parental/older sibling figure needs, at least at that point. He may even try to runaway with them to keep them safe from the others. Hell, he may even get his mother involved if he was desperate enough, especially if he saw the Reader as a parental figure. Or maybe even another Justice League member to either adopt him and the Reader so that he could have that family experience he was promised with the Reader. Or he would be completely content just living the rest of his life just him and the Reader, platonically of course.

It would either take Bruce or Dick to have a talk with Damian to get him to come to some agreement to allow them to continue with what they’re doing in regards to the Reader. I think Dick would get away with manipulating Damian much better than Bruce could. I think Damian would have some opinions about his father especially throughout this whole situation. Especially since I see Damian being very observant of how Dick, Jason and Tim are behaving towards the Reader early on and picking up on the fuckery taking place, even going as far as telling Bruce about it under the belief his father would be on his side (not ever fathoming the idea of his father also doing similar things to the Reader without him ever knowing). As far as Damian knew his father was completely platonic towards the Reader, as a ‘father’ should be. Right? So understandably Damian feels not only betrayed but also disgusted when he finds out that his father was and still is taking part in, acting in a similarly depraved fashion as the others.

Eventually, I could see them coming together and being one big ‘happy’ family. But it sure as hell comes at a price. (Usually the Reader’s freedom and sense of self outside of the obsession they’ve been dragged into, to drown in alongside their yandere(s).)

#anxious answers #yandere bruce wayne #yandere dick grayson #yandere jason todd #yandere tim drake #yandere batboys #yandere dc concept #yandere batboys concept #yandere concept

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killerlookz · 8 months ago

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Hello my fellow Criminal Minds fan! 😊

May I please request headcanons for Spencer falling for a female agent who’s cynical about love and relationships due to being hurt in the past?

a/n: thank you sm for the request! i'd be happy to write this for you! :-)

Falling in Love Again | Spencer Reid Headcannons

pairing: spencer reid x f!reader

content: mentions of reader having been cheated on in the past, uhhhh that's really it haha

word count: 1,478 (sorry she's so long)

Spencer Reid had always been excited about falling in love, the thought of being so close to another person- to share so much with someone was such a wonderful thing to him.

Especially after watching his mom and dad growing up, and the way his father treated her-Spencer was dead set on never becoming anything like him, he looked forward to treating a woman right and spending the rest of his life with her.

But, for as excited as he was he was probably 20 times more nervous about the whole falling in love thing.

So when you came around, and he started to experience that warm, creeping feeling in his chest- he felt a little bit like his world was going to end.

Spencer had never made a move on anyone before, sure he did make out with Lila Archer that one time but he didn't exactly initiate it.

Spencer decided just to channel all of his romantic interest in becoming friends with you, at least he got to spend time with you, that's what really mattered to him. Maybe one day it would turn into something more.

Well.. he hoped until he couldn't help but overhear...

"I went on my first date in months last night, and all this guy did was talk about himself the entire time- didn't let me get a word out, I mean, can you believe it?" Emily says, exasperated

You look up at her as she stands in front of your desk, "Oh, trust me Emily, I can believe it." You shake your head

"I mean," She throws her hands up, "What is it with men? What's wrong with them."

"Everything," You smirk, "They're men. I can't remember I had a good experience with one of them- never maybe?" You laugh. "I've given up on dating."

Your words sunk into Spencer's brain, leaving him with a heavy feeling all around he felt awful- not just about the fact that his chances with you seemed to reduce to zero right there in that moment, but because of how upset you seemed under your sarcastic exterior, he could tell you'd really been hurt before.

A few weeks later you're out for drinks with Emily, Penelope, Morgan, Spencer, and JJ. Amidst the loud, drunken conversations and music at the bar- you can hear the faint chiming sounds of your ring tone, Who would be calling this late?

As you take your phone from your pocket, your stomach drops when you see the number flashing on the screen. The mere sight of those 10 digits making you want to throw your phone to the ground and stomp on it until nothing remains.

"Ooooh, who's that calling." Morgan smirks

You look him dead in the eyes and respond flatly, "My ex."

Morgan's smile doesn't fade instead his smirk seems to deepen, "You two got a little thang goin on?"

"No," You shove your phone back in your pocket, "More like he's trying to get back in my pants after cheating on me- twice."

"Ooh!" Morgan responds, wincing, "So he's a dog."

"A pig is more like it." You scoff, "Who does he think he is. I can't even imagine giving my time to another man again, and even if I could- what makes him so confident I'd give him the time of day."

That familiar heavy pain hits Spencer again.

He's staring at you, and it's like the rest of the bar doesn't even exist. Only you, as you bite your lip, trying to hide any emotion in your face.

Spencer has become good at reading your emotions, maybe it's because he spends so much time with you- maybe it's because of how often he finds himself staring at your face. As much as you try to seem nonchalant, he could tell how upset you are.

Spencer would spend more time than he wanted to admit fantasizing about treating you well, about giving you the love you never seemed to have.

Every time you made a snarky comment about love, or how men had treated you in the past Spencer would want so desperately bad to just tell you about how well he would treat you, how he would never ever hurt you, how he would spend his entire life taking care of you.

The words were practically scratching up his throat, begging to be let out. But still, he would just swallow them down, and give you a sympathetic look, he couldn't muster up being able to do anything more.

At the very least, Spencer's plan of becoming friends with you was working.

The two of you would become very good friends.

Spencer would learn everything he could about you, he would want to know as much as possible.

Not in a weird creepy way- but in a he just thinks you're so amazing he can't get enough of you sort of way.

Every time you and Spencer hung out he wouldn't be able to ignore that nagging feeling, the thought of putting an arm around you and pulling you close, of holding your hand in his, or placing a delicate kiss on your cheek.

The thoughts would eat away at Spencer, and he would only fall more, and more in love with you.

Still, he would lose more hope every time you divulged information about your prior encounters with love. He couldn't blame you for feeling so cynical it, not after what you'd been through.

Spencer would think about his mom, about all the wives Rossi had been through, about Hotch and Hailey, about you- he would wonder why love had to be so painful for some people. He was sure he would never hurt somebody he loved.

One day you're over Spencer's apartment, watching a rom-com, and you make a snide remark, "Oh, real love isn't like that." You scoff and roll your eyes.

Spencer doesn't know what it is, but something in him makes him respond, "It could be." He says meekly

You look up at him, caught off guard at his disagreement, "Hm?" you hum

Spencer wasn't able to take it any more, he hated hearing your cynical nature. He would need you to know how you deserved the entire world.

"Love- It can be like the movies." He affirms his stance.

"Not in my experience."

"I would give you love like that." Spencer would tremble as he makes his confession, so unsure of what would happen next.

He would be terrified of your reaction, scared he was about to mess everything up, ruin any future the two of you had together, and even worse, lose your friendship.

"W-what do you mean, Spence."

"I mean, you always talk about how you've been hurt before, and it just-" He takes a deep breath in, contemplating what he's going to say next, "I love you, y/n," He looks down at his lap, then back up at you, "I would never hurt you."

Despite the obvious passion in Spencer's voice, you were still hesitant about it, but everything inside of you told you to give Spencer a chance.

Spencer would insist on taking things slow, you were his first real relationship and he wouldn't want to rush things, for both his and yours sake. He wouldn't pressure you to put a label on things, or even say you're "dating"- those would come on your own time.

Spencer was determined to make you believe in love again, and he would do everything in his power to make sure you knew without a doubt how he felt about you.

Spencer would often get to work before you to surprise you with coffee and a breakfast sandwich, or a donut on your desk in the mornings.

He would insist on having a date night at least once a week, even if the two of you were on a case, ordering room service or finding a local pizza restaurant way late at night was sufficient, as long as the two of you got to spend time together.

Spencer would be hesitant about PDA or really moving too quickly into being too affectionate, still, he would frequently hold your hand, squeezing it tight when he could tell you were stressed or upset- either by a case or by life in general, he just wanted to give you that extra reassurance that he was there for you.

Spencer would really put the work in, he'd exert more effort than you had ever seen from any past relationship into even the tiniest things.

Spencer wouldn't mind though, anything he could do to reassure you that he loves and cares about you, he would do it.

Every little act of love and gratitude would be worth it to him.

He would savor and cherish every hug, every shared glance, every peck on the forehead, on the cheek, on the lips.

It was all worth it to him, every second of it- all he wanted to do was make you smile, to make you fall in love again.

#spencer reid #spencer reid headcannons #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fic #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n

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4dkellysworld · 4 months ago

Text

After deciding 'it is done'

This is more of a manifestation themed post (it's a draft from March when I spontaneously felt like writing it but didn't post it) because I felt like it but I'd appreciate if I didn't get any asks about manifestation* (unless I change my mind later) cos I'll share what I can and there's a lot of material available already! You can see my past post on this topic here. For more posts on it, see @4dbarbie-archive and realisophie's posts here and here and there's also some over at @ndjournal in the experience sharing tag.

*Also because I don't want to send mixed messages to the readers of this blog. I see conscious manifestation as a way to challenge & break limitations and concepts from the mind, not to get things in the world (kinda like Neo learning to bend the spoon in the Matrix if you get me lol). The latter will only pull you deeper into ego and the world, which isn't conducive to self-realization (if that's your goal) if you're focused on satisfying ego and the worldly life. If that makes sense and you resonate and agree with that, then we are on the same page but not everyone is and that's okay too, just do what feels right to you. Just sharing my reasoning :)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I've been reading this book called Parallel Universes of Self because I read the author Frederick Dodson had an interesting reality shifting experience. I didn't expect to read info on manifestation but they are pretty much the same. I have a few books of his that I'm skimming through out of curiosity and there's some interesting stuff (I might share some other things later, he doesn't just talk about manifestation, but also consciousness, reality and even non-duality).

I thought I'd share the below excerpt because it's explained really well and might help some others. It's also a nice succinct summary of what Ada and Soph talked about for materialization/manifestation as well. I can remember pretty much 95% of the things I've ever "manifested" were from when I acted the way he described after I had decided "it is done". It's easier to do this for things you don't care about because you just end up forgetting about it entirely and then it shows up and you're like 'oh yeah!! nice'.

In the hours, days and weeks after simply rest in the new viewpoint, rest in the fulfilled reality. This means that you don’t try to “make it happen” because you have already claimed it as real. You don’t affirm, visualize, repeat or wait for it. You don’t hope for it to come in some future. Because you have claimed it as already real you don’t even think about it much either. You don’t ask when, how, where it will show up. Instead you simply do what offers itself to you throughout the day, and this will involve commonplace activities. Daily life continues in a natural manner without neediness or lack. Once in awhile you may want to re-feel the body sense of the chosen reality, and enjoy what you have claimed as true, but often not even that is necessary. Furthermore you needn’t be “acting as if” the desired reality is manifest, for that still implies separation. Simply cease to behave in a way that presupposes that it is not already so. You may refuse to ascribe relevance or importance to any events that seem to contradict your newly chosen reality. From the new viewpoint such events may still exist and come up but they are no longer relevant enough to be reacted to and interacted with. They may be the way things are at the moment, but they are no longer the way you are. The corresponding physical manifestation will appear when you stop needing it, chasing after it, looking for it but are instead willingly and lovingly identified with it…not for the sake of “making it manifest” *, but for the sake of experiencing its joy in the here, now and today. *Because trying to make it happen/manifest reinforces the idea/belief that it isn't

This is the same as what 4dbarbie said about getting ego out of the way or as Lester Levenson said, let go and let God. Just let it happen and stop trying to control the process because the more you try, the more you reinforce the fact that it isn't already so. Basically stop putting in effort once you know it is true, just continue knowing with calm and ease that it is the way you want it. Ada also said here:

If you have thoughts like "I need to say my affirmations", "I need to check my state", you're not living in the end but still desiring. When you're able to look at the thing you desire as being something that was once a dream, but now only a memory - you've entered the state of the wish fulfilled. When desire turns into identity, you know you've succeeded in fulfilling yourself.

Yes we're conditioned to think we need to work hard and put effort to earn things in the world but when it comes to manifesting, this sort of mentality will only sabotage and hinder your success. You can literally just decide you have it and then never look back. This sort of mindset can take a bit of time and practice to get used to because it is not something we're used to but the more you practice, the easier it gets.

Here is an excerpt from an astral projection book (I think it's from The Illusion of Method?) I thought was really apt at describing this too. He's talking about AP but you can apply it to manifesting or pretty much anything as well.

Unless you are masochistic, I ask you to reconsider the painful idea of obsessing about time. Bear in mind that results will come whenever they have to, and counting the minutes won't make the outcome arrive faster. It's best if you just forget about it, and accept that it is something that you can't control. You must be patient—most of the time the desired results arrive immediately after giving up control of time. If you are frustrated and/or are afraid of failure, then it means you believe you are in control—and this translates into the feeling that you are responsible for both positive and negative results. Well then, stop thinking that way! Exempting yourself from responsibility is the best course of action there is. As seen in the previous chapter, those who project on command are the ones who couldn’t care less about AP. But the more you obfuscate yourself, the lesser your chances of success —and trust me, you won’t want to get trapped in that vicious cycle. Astral projection works when you stop worrying about failure because you trust that it will happen, whether you “do” something or not.

It’s the same thing: just in the same way that being hasty for sleep to occur keeps us wakeful and alert, being expectant over the OBE will keep us caged in the physical body. If the mind is constantly thinking about the goal, it can easily enter a state of expectancy* and impatience. In such state, the mind is no longer relaxed because expectancy is a state of unrest. This form of tension is what hinders the outcome—thus, the key to being relaxed (i.e., essentially lacking mental tension) is to forget about the goal entirely. If you don’t have the goal in mind you don’t enter a state of expectancy, and therefore you are free from mental tension. *expectancy is the same energy as trying to make something happen.. reinforcing the idea/belief that it isn't so

So, exempt yourself from responsibility means there's nothing more to do because ego is not in control and can do nothing.

#writings #from my drafts #creation

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blitzwhore · 7 months ago

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I just saw Blitzø get called Stolas stockholm victim I can't with this fandom anymore😭

😂 As outrageously incorrect and stupid as that take is, I'm going to go on a tangent here. I hope you don't mind.

I think every fandom has annoying people with awfully terrible takes in it. People with zero media literacy. People who hatewatch. People who think they're entitled to the exact show they would've wanted, which has nothing to do with the actual, existing show.

This is especially true for queer media, and especially true for queer cartoons. (Hi, yes. I was active in the Adventure Time, Steven Universe, Voltron, and She-Ra fandoms when those shows were airing, respectively. I've seen some stuff). Some people just can't handle queer cartoons, period. If the queer characters/ships are soft and wholesome, they're infantilising and boring, and if they're complex and nuanced and actually have conflict, they're abusive and problematic. You'll hear the same recycled arguments over and over again. Like, the shit some people are saying about Blitz and Stolas after The Full Moon? Is literally almost word-for-word what they said about Catra and Adora post-season 3 of She-Ra (and even at the end of the show).

Here's the thing, though! Those people and their bad takes are not what I want to think about what I think about a fandom. Those aren't the people I want to call the fans. They don't deserve that title. Not when so many other people are out there dedicating their time to making gifs and art and meta posts, and writing fic, and commenting/reblogging to show support, and sliding into people's DMs to scream and squee together about a thing they love.

At the end of the day, "fandom" is just a lot of people each doing their own thing. Which people you engage with and allow to stay within your line of sight will determine your fandom experience. Fandom can be a huge, convoluted, online space full of people who are constantly arguing with one another and whose takes make you unfathomably angry... Or it can be you and your 5 friends and mutuals who scream gleefully at one another in 2-note posts. You can't control what others post online, but you can control your engagement with it.

How? Well, here's what I personally do to avoid getting upset by people's stupid opinions online:

Filter 'critical' and 'anti' tags (eg. #anti stolitz #anti vivziepop #Helluva Boss critical #HB critical #vivziepop critical). Many people actually do tag their critical posts because they know it's the respectful thing to do!

If I come across a post that has one or more of those tags, obviously, I don't click through to see it under any circumstances.

If I stumble across a stranger's untagged post with hate/criticism that upsets me: I stop reading and BLOCK. Immediately. I don't look back. I don't finish reading. I don't engage. I just block block block. I <3 the block button, seriously.

If I feel my mind reeling from a bad take I just came across: I take a step back, close my phone, breathe, remember life is beautiful sometimes. Go back and watch an episode I really like. Clean my living space a little. Vent about it to a friend (but only if I really need to, because if not, I'd rather not dwell on it).

If I'm starting to feel the need to reply to someone's bad take (directly or via my own post), I instead make the decision to channel that energy into making fandom posts out of love. (I don't do this just with fandom. If I see something transphobic online, I usually react by reblogging a bunch of trans art or trans positivity posts on my main, for example). I like to think of it as putting some positivity out into the world to compensate for the negativity I just saw. So, for example, if I see someone shitting on my blorbo, I may make a silly post just saying how much I love blorbo. Or I'll make (or draft) a post about how interesting I find some of blorbo's actions. Or reblog another person's positive/interesting post about blorbo.

And finally, I stay the hell away from Twitter. Or at least, if I go on Twitter, I try my best to avoid any tweet that has text in it instead of just art. Even the people who have good opinions spend too much time arguing with the people who have bad opinions on there. I don't want to see people's bad takes! No, not even while reading founded and perfectly articulated criticism of those bad takes! So I just limit my time on Twitter. And again, if someone is putting bad takes on my TL (even if it is to counter them), I unfollow and block as needed.

All this to say, yes, it really fucking sucks to read the opinions of people who don't understand and who hate the characters and ships and worlds you love. Gosh it's the worst. But you can curate your fandom experience. You can focus on the things you can control. You have the power to decide if your fandom experience is draining or fun!

And because I don't know how to finish this, here, have a Stolitz kiss to heal you:

We will keep winning and there's nothing the haters can do about it. 😌

#helluva boss #stolitz #curate your experience #Long post #Kinda?#As someone who was around when Catradora seemed to be crashing and burning: we will win. Ignore the haters #Trust the process #The gays are traumatised and acting accordingly AND THAT'S OKAY #Also go and watch She-ra if you haven't <3 #And SU and AT

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tavolgisvist · 3 months ago

Text

Michael Lindsay-Hogg

about Let It Be and our lads

I showed the final cut to them and we all had dinner afterwards. Then we went down to a discotheque underneath the restaurant. Ringo was jiving 'til two in the morning, Paul said he liked the movie…It was all a very good experience until they broke up, which was only two months after they'd seen the picture ready to go.

And then, of course, there was so much going on to do with the breakup. First it was legal issues, but then legal issues became personal issues. By that point, Let It Be was kind of a little character in the corner saying, "Oh, remember me? Remember me?" They were not interested in it anymore, which they had been up until that point. There was just so much going on. … I didn't want the Beatles to lose their momentum. So when Paul came to me after the concert idea was off and said, “Should we stop filming?” And I said, “Well, no.” I thought, “Well, here's a chance to maybe do the documentary of the Beatles, which nobody has done before." Nobody had ever filmed them rehearsing. I didn't want to lose the chance, or risk the chance of their attention span going on to something else. So I was glad we stayed with them. … The Beatles were psychologically so interesting, having been together for such a long time. When they stopped touring in 1966, I think that had a very big effect on them because the other big bands kept touring. It makes bands more cohesive because they're stuck with each other. They're in a hotel room in Minneapolis and they can't leave the hotel because the crowd outside won't let them. So what are they going to do? They go down to the coffee shop, go get some breakfast and go back to their room. Nowadays they probably play video games, but back then they’d write a song. That's partly what changed for the Beatles, because they stopped touring and then they stopped living so closely and intimately with each other as they had in Liverpool, or performing in the Red Light District in Hamburg. Back then they were in the same hotel room, And then they stopped and they had to start to think, “What is my life?” I was always kind of aware in Let It Be that that's the point I got them at. I'd worked with them in ‘66, but by the time we were doing ‘69 they were asking the question that often people do ask: “What is my life and where am I? “ Even though they were so successful and so talented — they kind of had taken over the world — it still was the same questions: “Who am I, where am I, what am I doing?” … To get them on the roof was hard enough with the eleven cameras and the [camera crew] in the road and the two way mirror [with a camera] in the foyer [to film the police arrival]. But they got up there. And it was not a slam dunk even five minutes before we were supposed to be on the roof. There was still a sense of, “Well, do we want to do this…” I expected them to play the songs, but I didn't expect them to have so much joy in doing the songs. When I saw it the other night again, it's just so sweet. The way they look at each other, the way John looks over at Paul, and Paul and John. You know, they went to school together. They started writing songs when they were 16. And George embraced his part as the lead guitar player. You look at them and you go, “That's good, isn't it?” And that's the thing which is so miraculous about the picture: I didn't do it, they did it. The connection between them is so potent at the end that it almost breaks your heart to see…

(Michael Lindsay-Hogg, May 2024, interview with Jordan Runtagh for People)

Q: There’s the infamous “argument,” between Paul and George, which now looks really tame. А: Well, that’s very interesting you say that, because whenever they saw it, they never mentioned the argument. They never said, ‘Boy, what are people going to think?” Once we turned it into a documentary, Paul said, “If you find there are things that we say to each other that show, ‘This is who we are now, it’s not the way it was a few years ago,’ let’s put them in.’ So that went in. But that’s really what you could look at as an artistic discussion between musicians. It’s the same in the theater, the same kind of things the actors say when they talk about a scene. “Are you really going to say the line that way? You can’t say it like that.’ ‘But if you say it like this, I can’t have my reply the way I want to do it.” And so that’s exactly like that. So for them it was business as usual. Q: Why did it look so shocking to people? А: It was shocking because they still thought of the Beatles as the mop-tops. People still saw them as the Ed Sullivan Beatles, the way they were when they started. People thought they were so cute and adorable. Well, they weren’t cute and adorable. They were four tough kids from Liverpool who’d learned their craft playing in hotel-cum-brothels in Hamburg. I mean, they were tough. They grew up in Liverpool, which was a tough city. It’s like growing up in Detroit or somewhere. Somewhere, that toughness always comes out. But when people went to see Let It Be, the Beatles had just broken up, and so people were watching the movie trying to discover the reasons why they’d broken up, looking for things that weren’t there, because it was such a big issue for a lot of people. Especially in America, because the Beatles represented so much here: President Kennedy in November ’63, all that grief, then the Beatles on Ed Sullivan, February ’64, and all the grief is overcome by joy. Everyone in America thought they were so cute, wearing badges that said “I love Paul” or “I love Ringo.” This is when they were 22, 23, 24 years old. But then they did change. That’s what you see in Let It Be—the boys we have known are becoming men. People hadn’t seen the men yet. They didn’t know the men. And that’s what I think Let It Be does show.

(Michael Lindsay-Hogg, May 2024, interview with Rob Sheffield for Rolling Stones)

"Because the Beatles had been portrayed as the moptops, that they were just f***ing adorable. In real life, they were tough. This just goes back to where they came from. Liverpool is a tough town. I wouldn't particularly want to run into Paul McCartney in a dark alley, if he didn't like me."

(Michael Lindsay-Hogg, May 2024, interview with Brian Hiatt for Rolling Stones)

As the TV concert had been cancelled, Michael felt he needed a new ending. ‘So I said, “Why don’t we do a concert on the roof?” Since then everyone has claimed credit for it*, including the ladies who cooked lunch!’ Before the event, he installed a two-way mirror in the lobby downstairs. ‘I did it in case the police showed up. I knew some people would complain about the noise and as an American who didn’t really have a work permit, I was afraid of being deported,’ he admits. As it turned out, he had bigger problems. In the anteroom underneath the roof, Paul was raring to go. ‘Ringo said, “It’s really cold up there” [he ended up wearing his wife Maureen’s coat while drumming] and George said, “What’s the point?” John hadn’t said anything yet and there was a pause where the whole thing was in the balance,’ says Michael. ‘Finally, John said, “F*** it, let’s do it” and they all walked up the ladder, onto the roof and into history.’

(Michael Lindsay-Hogg, June 2020, Lina Das for The Weekend Magazine)

Q: You’ve said the rough cut had more of John and Yoko but that the other three members “didn’t want to have a lot of the dirty laundry” in there… A: I would not now call it ‘dirty laundry’. I would say that The Beatles didn’t want distraction. <…> Q: There’s one scene where Paul and George are arguing about what George is going to play… A: They never asked for that to be taken out of the movie… I think that, for them, that was a normal exchange between two musical artists who are thinking what’s best for the song. <…> Q: Who do you think was most invested in keeping the band together? A: Paul had the idea that they should maybe do a concert and the others more or less agreed. I mean, he’s a very strong personality. He’s incredibly smart… And I could completely see how that would focus them all. It seemed like a really good idea. So I would say Paul was the one who wanted that and it made a lot of sense. So that’s my answer to that question. Q: When George quit and then came back, he suggested moving to The Beatles’ Apple HQ to finish the album… A: Yes, he said, ‘let’s not worry about performing [the planned concert] and let’s just get out of Twickenham.’

(Michael Lindsay-Hogg, May 2024, interview with Alex Flood for NME)

“There are moments of great sweetness,” he said. “No matter where you put the camera, no matter how you edited it, they loved each other. Anybody who sees ‘Let It Be’ again will find that.” … The film was a victim of bad timing, in his view. By the time of its May 1970 premiere, the Beatles had broken up. Traumatized fans saw it as “a breakup movie: ‘Mom and Dad are getting divorced!’” he said. … He has preserved much of what he went through with the Beatles in diaries, which he has kept since the “Ready Steady Go!” years. … He thumbed through the pages and landed on January 30, the blustery day in London when the Beatles played in public for the last time. As captured by Mr. Lindsay-Hogg and his team, their swan-song performance was the climax of both “Let It Be” and “Get Back.” The diary page was blank, except for one word scribbled in black ballpoint pen. Roof. “The busier you are,” Mr. Lindsay-Hogg said, “the less you write down.”

(Michael Lindsay-Hogg, July 2022, interview with Alex Williams for The New York Times)

*Jan 7th

gif by @sgt-paul

Also Jan 7th Paul's 'colossal' idea about ideal end of their show

@crepesuzette2023, your tag 'Michael Lindsay Hogg would not like to run into him in a dark alley when he was in a bad mood!' reminds me I forgot to publish this :)

#michael lindsay-hogg #let it be #sessions: get back #the beatles #john lennon #paul mccartney #george harrison #ringo star #get back #peter jackson

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d-targaryenshoe · 1 year ago

Text

Rather Or Rather Not - Luke Thompson

Word count: 868

Summary: Would you rather answer questions by yourself or to be joined by your lover and a friend?

The grand ballroom on the Bridgerton set was abuzz with excitement as a game hosted by Netflix began.

You, Nicola Coughlan, and Luke Thompson, three of the most talented and beloved actors in the Bridgerton series, gathered around a lavish table adorned with candelabras and sparkling chandeliers.

The theme of the game was Would you rather, inspired by your beloved show, Bridgerton.

The air was thick with anticipation as you waited for the first question to be revealed.

"It's time to play!" cheered Nicola Coughlan, who portrayed Penelope Featherington, as she flitted about the room, handing out cards to each of the players.

"Remember, you must answer the question truthfully, and may the best actor win!" With a dramatic flourish, she flipped over the first card, revealing the first question: "Would you rather... binge-watch the entire series in one sitting, or have to wait an entire year for the next season to premiere?"

You all glanced at each other, knowing full well that this was a question you had been contemplating for months.

You, who portrayed the vivacious y/c/n, grinned widely and said, "Oh, I could never wait a whole year! I'd much rather binge it all in one go."

Nicola Coughlan, who brought the iconic Penelope Featherington to life, nodded in agreement.

"I completely understand," she said with a sigh. "It's torture not knowing what happens next."

Luke Thompson, your boyfriend and the man who played the dashing and mysterious Lord Benedict Bridgerton, chuckled and said, "Well, it seems you two have already made up your minds. In that case, I'll have to go with the opposite choice. I'd much rather take my time and savor each episode as they air."

You and Nicola laughed, impressed by his restraint.

The next question was revealed: by you.

"Would you rather... have your character end up with your on-screen love interest, or have them find true love with someone else?" you bit your lip, considering the possibilities.

"Oh, that's a tough one... I think I'd want my character to end up with their true love. Even if it means someone else gets the happy ending, you know?"

Nicola Coughlan nodded in agreement.

"Agreed," she said. "As much as I love my character with Colin, I think it would be more satisfying to see her find happiness with someone who truly deserves it if the story would be different."

The tension in the room was palpable as the final question was revealed by your boyfriend.

"Would you rather... have your character's life play out exactly as it does in the books, or have the opportunity to rewrite their fate and give them a different ending?" Luke furrowed his brow, deep in thought.

"That's a hard one... I think I'd like to see my character have the chance to write their own ending. Even if it means straying from the source material, it's important for them to have agency and make their own choices."

Nicola Coughlan glanced over at you, who was still lost in thought. "What about you, y/n? What would you choose?"

You looked up, a determined expression on your face. "You know, I think I'd rather rewrite their fate. Because even if their life isn't perfect, they can still find happiness in the end. And who's to say what's meant to be, anyway?"

The other actors nodded in agreement, feeling the weight of the question settle over them.

The final question hung in the air, unanswered, but for now, it could wait. There would be plenty of time for more questions, more laughter, and more memories to be made.

Because in the end, that was what being a part of the Bridgerton family was truly about: finding joy in the journey, no matter where it led.

The question was revealed: "Would you rather... spend the rest of your life in the world of Bridgerton, or step outside of it and explore new roles and experiences?"

Nicola's eyes widened, and she glanced around the table at her fellow actors.

"That's quite the quandary," she mused. "But I think I would have to say that I would rather stay in Bridgerton. Not only because I love it here, but because I believe that we are one family and that there is so much out there waiting to be told."

You nodded in agreement. "I feel the same way, definitely. This role has given me so much, and I think there are so much possibilities in this project. I can't wait to see what it still holds."

Luke, ever the optimist, added, "I'd have to say the same. And I know that whatever comes next, we'll always have Bridgerton and each other."

You all raised your glasses in a toast, the clinking of crystal against porcelain filling the empty ballroom with a joyous noise.

And so the game went on, the questions flying fast and furious, as you all shared your thoughts, your dreams, and your fears.

You discussed your favorite moments from the series, your hopes for the future, and the lessons you learned along the way.

You laughed and you cried, you debated and you agreed, and through it all, you all felt a bond that went deeper than any script could ever convey.

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cripplecharacters · 2 months ago

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Hello! Thanks for all your hard work.

I have a character who lives through a war and experiences a traumatic head/facial injury that leaves him with asymmetrical features. Before discovering this blog, I wrote him as being a little insecure about it even years later (the main story takes place long after that), but have since retconned that as I realized writing it that way was the result of ingrained disfiguresmia, which I don’t want to perpetuate. As it currently stands, he does not have any particular feelings about his appearance itself/the visible remnants of the injury, nor is he treated differently for it. It’s just a thing, and not the focus of his character. Recently, however, as I was working on more of his background, I realized he ended up bearing a strong resemblance to one of his parents, who harmed him quite badly as a child.

So, my question is this: While nobody would be happy to experience a traumatic injury, would it be in bad taste for him to eventually end up being pleased that he no longer looks so much like his parent? Not that the genetic resemblance has somehow disappeared as a result of an injury, but rather that when he looks in the mirror, he sees himself instead of someone who hurt him?

I want to be careful to portray facial difference respectfully. I thought that maybe associating the visible result of something traumatic (cranio-facial injury) with gaining a stronger sense of identity (in a positive way) might be alright. But I wanted to check, because I don’t want to go too far the opposite direction and romanticize it.

(I’m using this emoji combination so I can find my ask later:🪞💙💥)

Hi!

My original note when drafting this was "This is genuinely a rare and interesting take on a character's feelings after getting a facial difference and it goes hard as fuck", which is a Way to say that I like it.

I don't think it's in bad taste at all, it's more of a breath of fresh air with interesting characterization mixed in. Has the character's backstory influencing his feelings on a current event. I get to mildly see myself in this kind of experience as I'm also glad to no longer be told I look really similar to a family member since my partial paralysis got more obvious. Cool as hell.

I really love that you figured out something positive that makes sense for your character to take out of an acquired facial difference. I mean, this is what people do in real life; try to find positives. It looks like your character managed to do that and that's awesome.

I wouldn't consider this romanticization at all, but even if it slightly was then I think we can have a bit of it as a treat after decades of hearing how looking different makes us fundamentally worse. It's not like you're doing some inspiration porn shtick about how an acquired disability suddenly made him into a saint who no longer has a single mean thought in his head.

If this worries you though, try to keep in mind the negative symptoms that he almost surely has - does he have nerve damage, migraines, problems with speaking, fear of loud noises? These things don't go away if you feel positive about something, though it might make it easier to mentally deal with. Show the parts he's more glad about, and the ones that make his life more difficult, days that are better and days that kinda suck. Make him struggle in areas of life unrelated to his disability, and have joys that are unrelated to it too. The usual advice.

This was probably my favorite synopsis of a character with a facial difference I read in a long time, so thank you for sending this. I'd love to see more characters as carefully thought out as this one.

mod Sasza

#mod sasza #🪞💙💥#face difference

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thesophiewhit · 1 month ago

Text

PHONING FAUST -- A Sapphic Novel of Demonic Contracts, Demisexuality, and Yearning by me! A cool queer author ~

Are you LGBT+ or BIPOC or just REALLY LOVE BOOKS? Interested in being an ARC reader and reading a book and helping a fellow queer indie author out? (Pretty please? -- ARC links all the way at the bottom of this post (beneath the rainbow banner) for those who like Sapphic demon x human angst books ~)

AND LOOK AT THE CHARACTER ART OF MEMPHIS (BADASS DEMON) AND DIAN (HUMAN) BY MY ARTIST FRIEND SNAX

https://linktr.ee/artsnaxk

ABOUT ME

Demisexual?? Queer? Nonbinary? All these were magical words to me until it hit...

Oh-- that's me.

It took me a while to come out as queer, longer to come out as nonbinary, and then some more time to reconcile all this with being a mixed Indonesian kid. A dash of mental health, a sprig of figuring out asexuality and neurodivergence. But atop all that? One thing has been constant.

I've always been a writer.

That's some live footage of me summoning some forces to reign my characters in from being feral.

WHY I WROTE PHONING FAUST

Well, well, well, after years of battling imposter's syndrome, I did it. I wrote another book! It's called PHONING FAUST and it's getting published with queer indie publishing company @ninestarpress-blog because they're all cool and LGBT+ and super talented!

Why did I write PHONING FAUST?

What is... a Faust?

A Faustian bargain is what's popularly known as the devil's bargain. A usually losing situation or a trick where the devil tricks someone out of their soul in exchange for ULTIMATE POWER!

I rewrote Faust to be Sapphic as can be. It stars a mixed Indonesian lesbian named Dian Faust who battles depression tooth and nail and ends up calling a mental health crisis hotline. Bc... she's lonely.

PAUSE-- and this is a horror comedy. Comedy. COMEDY-- you might say?

WHY? HOW? Sounds sad and depressing, right?

WHAT'S FAUST?

Well... in the original retelling version of Goethe's Faust (who retold it from folklore etc etc) the main character of Dr. Faustus accidentally summons the devil or something when he too is about to consider the meaning of life and it gets sad bc he doesn't see one so he makes the devil's bargain FOR ULTIMATE POWER. Or something.

But in my version-- it's based off my experiences as a queer person. Before I had community. Before I understood and accepted myself-- I had a rough time. For a whole bunch of factors outside of that-- I didn't feel like my life was in a good place. And even worse-- I felt isolated.

THE PLOT

I didn't want to bother my friends with my problems. So-- I'd call the Trevor Project or a crisis hotline just to have somebody to talk to. In the same way-- Dian Faust is struggling with depression in the story I write. So she calls a hotline like the Trevor Project just to not be alone.

And guess who she finds?

A super hot genderfluid devil called MEMPHIS, short for Mephistopheles. A pierced and tatted punk rocker who has an interest for telling tall tales and serving Dian Faust's every wish and command! (No, not like that!)

Because Dian Faust, like me, is a mixed Indonesian kid trying to figure out what it means to be queer AND demisexual (finding attraction only after really getting to emotionally connect with someone and feeling, as I explain in the book, a lack of that before then for anyone). And she's figuring plenty out--- including how to save her immortal soul and her feelings for a certain genderfluid demon but if you want to know more-- YOU CAN BUT YOU HAVE TO SCROLL TO THE END OF THIS POST TO FIND OUT !

I wrote this book PHONING FAUST (coming out in 2025 sometime with NineStar Press btw. I have these books CATCH LILI TOO and WAKE THE DEAD also starring Sapphic demiace MCs if it's helpful while you wait!

I WROTE MORE QUEER BOOKS (if interested)! (ARC SIGN UP LINK IS STILL BELOW THIS ONE THO! > FOLLOW THE RAINBOW !!)

MY OTHER QUEER BOOKS: https://sophiawhittemore.com/books/ ) <3 <3 <3

I wrote PHONING FAUST (train of thought, sorry, that's the neurodivergence) because I wanted people to feel less alone.

I was, like Dian Faust and like a lot of people, a queer person who felt like I was on an island unto myself. I didn't know who to turn to-- so I turned to no one. By reaching out to hotlines (no hot devils unfortunately), I managed to get the help I needed to avoid making rash decisions-- to get the help I needed to get better. To take that first step.

PHONING FAUST is a novel that raises the importance of mental health and finding community, and most importantly, not giving up. As Dian Faust says in my upcoming book...

There are stars out there-- I had only to see it.

***

🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈

🌈🌈🌈🌈ARC LINK SIGN UPS HERE 🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈

ARC LINK SIGN UPS IN LINKTREE <3

Want to be an ARC reader for this queer book starring a demisexual Sapphic couple and BIPOC cast?

***

Hmmm, demon contracts...now where might young 2010 emo me have heard that before... ? ?

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ilions-end · 14 days ago

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🎵 guess who finished the argonautica by apollonius of rhoooodes 🎵

the peter green translation served me well and i enjoyed the sizable commentary section, although it probably influenced my interpretation more than i'd like for a first read (green is VERY opinionated and also hilariously bitchy about scholars he disagrees with. the first time i've read such a sarcastic translator's commentary!)

BUT ANYWAY THE EPIC ITSELF:

iiiii have never felt this much anxiety reading an epic before?? there's an ambiguity and sense of danger in this poem's events that aren't necessarily WORSE than in other epics, but there's a feeling that i can't... actually trust the heroes involved. the argonauts are rowdy and reactive, and jason is NOT able to take charge of them -- he shrinks away and goes silent whenever his leader position is called into question. the mob rules, whoever shouts the loudest (often telamon!) in any given situation gets to decide, no thought of consequences.

or maybe reading about a main character who wants to do great things but suffers from debilitating conflict avoidance is a little too real. agh.

(and it's not like the thebaid! you can't trust the heroes in the thebaid either but their hubris and egos makes them PREDICTABLE. there's something unnervingly ambiguous and potentially unsafe about jason and his argonauts, even though they never get up to anything truly horrible. in this version anyway)

jason is incredibly intriguing -- even at his most unlikeable. it's like he tripped and fell into a story he doesn't belong in, he's so awkwardly miscast as a great greek hero and can't live up to the poem's own hype. he's described as heroic at every turn even when he's not actually being heroic, like in an INCREDIBLE passage as he fights the dragon teeth warriors and he's said to "valiantly hide behind his shield". LOOK AT THAT PHRASE!! HE'S BRAVELY COWERING. incredible writing. apollonius is genuinely a master of subtle sarcasm throughout.

like it says a lot that there are MANY variations of the line "but Jason, eyes fixed on the ground, sat there speechless, unmoving, at a loss in this crisis". and baby there are a lot of crises in an epic...

also maiden-coded jason still makes me vibrate! his frequently downcast gaze, his shy passivity, how delicately his body is described, the way he is a sexual object to pursue instead of the pursuer, how unusually tactile he is... one of the most memorable parts to me is when he finally gets the golden fleece, and what does he do? he doesn't raise it above his head in triumph, he doesn't wrap it around himself like a glorious cape and stride to address his men. he disengages completely and, spellbound, pets it and caresses it and combs his fingers through it in almost erotic delight. just. immediate zoned-out personal gratification, we're hitting masturbation parallels, no other greek hero would DO that!

which also makes it interesting that they use the fleece as bedding for their wedding night. i wonder which one jason enjoys lying with most, medea or the fleece...?

yeah so when medea appeared suddenly allllll my affection for jason evaporated. i'm not one of those "yay medea butchering her children is girl power actually!!" girlies (that's five hundred times too reductive a way to engage with a greek tragedy for me), i was prepared for whatever kind of medea apollonius would give me, but WOW SHE IS SO INCREDIBLY SYMPATHETIC (and intentionally so, see how she isn't even the one to kill her brother in this), she is SO ill-treated here. it's SHE who undoubtedly is the gods' plaything in this, not jason!

like how HORRIBLE her experience of being obsessively in love is! (turns out getting shot by eros' arrow is a psychological and emotional NIGHTMARE!!) how painfully aware she is of her own irrationality, how intense her inner life is. at one point she thinks so much about jason all night that she self-induces a (shockingly realistically described) migraine! she loves him so much she wants to kill herself instead of feeling something so intense and unpleasant and overwhelming. JESUS CHRIST it's so evocative.

she torches her whole life, her own safety, her own family for jason, and all he can do (after a lot of pushing) is murmur vague promises. it's HEARTBREAKING the utter helplessness she accepts to live in for him. there is no safety net for her, no way to regain safety if things go wrong (and you are so painfully aware that things WILL go wrong)

generally the argonautica feels more closely related to the odyssey than any of the other epics i've read. not just all the sailing, but the centrality of magic, and of course visiting a lot of the same places -- including the court of alcinous and arete before they had nausicaa (and arete is already the one in charge!)

more moments i keep thinking about:

that first lovely glimpse of the inherent dysfunction of the expedition as the argonauts have gathered for the first time ready for departure, and jason delivers a speech like "men! now that *I*, jason son of aeson, have arranged MY glorious expedition so that *I* can find the glorious fleece and win MY kingdom back, who do we all figure should be captain? 😉" and all the argonauts immediately start chanting "HE-RA-CLES! HE-RA-CLES! HE-RA-CLES!" it's so funny

heracles' role is generally so amazing, what contrast he offers! because HE IS the old-school hero who can do anything, fight any enemy, who has everyone's ear (if not respect -- he seems to be a LOT to handle, even for the other argonauts), who can LEAD. but they FORGET HIM ON AN ISLAND AND LEAVE HIM BEHIND, and now jason, tripped-and-fell-into-epic-heroism jason!, gotta be fully in charge and timidly face every obstacle himself.

i genuinely didn't know hylas getting abducted by the nymphs was from this myth! AND HE'S HERACLES' LOVER, actually the eromenos to heracles' erastes?? and heracles LOSES HIS SHIT TO AN ANIMALISTIC DEGREE at the loss of hylas. this is why none of the other guys brought along their boytoys, dude, this is a disaster.

i REALLY appreciated the introductory rollcall of EVERY argonaut (even if half of them were never mentioned by name again). i always wish we had something like that for odysseus' main crew in the odyssey. it's nice having that overview.

one of the most memorable glimpses into the lives of the gods i've read: eros and ganymede in the garden, playing knucklebones together under the shade of flowering trees and they're both so youthful and so inhumanly beautiful and the scene is so idyllic -- and then aphrodite stomps in and immediately snaps at her son "what are you grinning at, you unspeakable little horror?" she HATES that spoiled teen. it's zeus and ares all over again.

speaking of gods, that one time the argonauts make landfall, and in the distance they see apollo just walking across the land (each footstep thundering) and they're scared stiff and just wait until he's fully passed by... and then can finally get on with their business. no followup, no consequences, just a random incident to freak them out. it reads like an animal encounter, like they saw a huge bear on a hike, i'm obsessed.

i got jumpscared any time the text mentioned "the son of oineus". i'm like WHAT. TYDEUS?? but no, meleager's here, it's fine.

as i mentioned, jason is the one who murders absyrtus (although medea isn't uninvolved) but i'm particularly fascinated by how neutrally we're told about the rituals he performs to not be cursed for it. like there's our wondrous hero, cutting off his murder victim's hands and feet, lapping up the blood and spitting it in the corpse's mouth three times. all done, welp, time we were on our way!

circe can see at first glance that she and medea are related because they both have the sun god's golden eyes, i love that!. and THEN THEY SPEAK TO EACH OTHER IN COLCHIAN, WHICH JASON DOESN'T SPEAK. he's sitting right there and i love that he doesn't understand what these incredibly powerful women are talking about.

obsessed with how jason is described as "walking like the morning star" (bright, promising, bringing good fortune) on lemnos and is then likened to a star of destruction and woe as he's about to meet medea for the first time. aaaaa it's so good.

the argonauts being challenged to a boxing match, and I GUESSED CORRECTLY that they would choose polydeuces as their champion!! i am embarrassingly proud actually. i did not know there was a boxing match (to the DEATH) in the argonautica but i KNEW polydeuces was famous for his boxing.

also i love that when they get to the garden of the hesperides it's a WRECK because heracles was there THE DAY BEFORE!!!! what an incredible sense of time and place, only seeing the IMMEDIATE AFTERMATH of the labours of heracles.

it's so WEIRD when the argonauts get to libya and they're out of supplies so they all just immediately give up and cry and hug and lie down in the sand to die. until the local goddesses come like "JESUS ARE YOU FOR REAL WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU GIVING UP NOW. GET GOING FOR FUCK'S SAKE."

oh ancient texts, i will never get used to your incestuous dreams of good fortune (no it's GOOD that he cried with shame for passionately fucking his daughter in his dream, that's a very lucky dream to have apparently).

and then apollonius just signs off like "yeah i know they're not home yet but i promise nothing interesting happened after this point. THE END." like he's just NOT gonna touch whatever fuckery happens after, you wanted the argonauts well you GOT the argonauts.

#first impressions tag #the argonautica #apollonius of rhodes #jason and the golden fleece

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scarletttries · 1 year ago

Text

Adrian Chase/ Vigilante Fluff Alphabet (Peacemaker)

Pairing: Adrian Chase/ Vigilante (Peacemaker) x GN!Reader

Rating: Pure Fluff

Word Count: 4.3k

Author's Note: Back to the boy that made me start writing again after years of stopping! 😍 I've been struggling to write while i've been busy with a new job and a bit of a cold, so I thought I'd go back to my best boy Vigilante for another alphabet post and just like that my heart was racing for him again 💕Enjoy and let me know if you have any Vigilante HCs requests 🥳

a -affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection?)

The moment Adrian gets the green light to show affection to you, that's all he can think of. He is such a physical person, always finding a reason to place a hand on your back or waist in public, and pulling you into his arms and threatening to never let you go after you have to spend mere moments apart. Behind closed doors, Adrian is constantly showering your face and hands with kisses, and there's no way he can sleep without a long slow good night kiss. He's also all about the sickly sweet nicknames and praising you for everything you do for him, just so endlessly grateful that he gets to call you his.

b - beauty (what do they admire about their s/o? what do you think is beautiful about them?)

It sounds like a cliche, but honestly he thinks you have the most beautiful eyes. He's never been a big fan of eye contact, finding it challenging to maintain, and when he manages usually people are looking at him with such an unkind mix of pity, disgust and contempt that he'd rather they weren't looking at him at all. But when he locks eyes with you and sees kindness, and interest, and not a single ounce of judgement, he knows that he never wants to look away from your perfect face, not for a second. And when he gets to see your eyes crease in the corners when he makes you smile and laugh with his ridiculous behaviour, well he thinks you are somehow even more beautiful.

There's a lot to consider beautiful about Adrian, his muscles, his adorable hair, his little nerdy smile when you start to pay attention to him, honestly there's nothing about him you'd ever want to change.

c- cuddles (do they like to cuddle? how would they cuddle?)

Adrian likes to cuddle so much he wonders how he survived before you came into his life! The first time the two of you watch a movie together and you throw a blanket over you both, laying your legs over his lap and nuzzling against his chest, you could practically hear his heart hammering away in excitement, so happy to be there with you and so scared he would do something to ruin such a happy moment. Now that he's more comfortable about your relationship he's definitely the one to instigate, collapsing into bed with his arms wide open and whimpering until you land on his chest, his whole body encircling yours as he kisses the top of you and tells you're stuck there now.

d - dates (what are dates with them like? do they plan them out or are they spontaneous?)

Adrian is definitely more of the spontaneous type who'll turn up at your door unannounced with a bouquet of flowers or a crate of beer, and ask if you'll please go out with him tonight, and offer that's hard to refuse when he gives you those big pleading puppy dog eyes. Dates are a lot of fun, usually doing something a bit more silly and childish than the typical dinner and a movie. He'll take you to an arcade, or a bar with a mechanical bull and try and show off his skills for you, but sometimes the best dates are just nights at home with wine and takeout, where you realise that it's suddenly 3am and you've ended up in a blanket fort on the floor and decide to just spend the night there - you two would be happy just about anywhere as long as you're together.

e - ending (if they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

In the past Adrian hasn't exactly had a lot of dating experience, but if someone showed an interest in him and he didn't feel the same way, he'd be very blunt about it - not necessarily as sensitive as he should be, but making sure there is absolutely no room for misunderstanding.

f - fiancee (how do they feel about commitment? how quick would they want to get married?)

Deep down (like way deep down before he meets you) Adrian is a real hopeless romantic. You've seen how much friendship means to him, and he knows being married is like having the closest of best friends, to love you forever, and who wants to be your friend for the rest of your life. He can't imagine anything more special than that, but he's also never had someone he felt like he could picture that kind of relationship with. Then of course you come into his life and fill it with kindness and laughter and warmth and suddenly he struggles to keep the l-word from falling of his lips every time you hold his hand, and he starts keeping a ring in his pocket for the moment he's at least 50% sure you might say yes.

g - gentle (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Despite a violent streak and almost superhuman strength, Adrian would be so incredibly soft and gentle when it comes to you. He knows what it's like to have you feelings hurt again and again and he never wants to make you feel as awful as he does when he speaks to someone other than you. He'd make sure he never delivered his snark in your direction, and is quick to tell you how smart your ideas are, supporting you in whatever you want to do. Physically he'd try and be conscious of his strength too, holding your hand very softly, and giving only the nicest, gentlest touches to your face when the two of you kiss. Sometimes he'll get a little too excited though and lift you into the air, throwing you against a bed or pulling you into a hug that threatens to take your breath away.

h - hugs (do they like hugs? how often do they do if? what are their hugs like?)

Adrian loves when you hug him so so much. The first time he feels you wrap your arms over his shoulders and pull him against your chest, a lump forms in his throat and he's not sure why, everything feeling so overwhelming as you tell him you're glad he came back from a mission safely. He'd think of nothing else for days, considering putting himself in increasingly dangerous situations just so you might have a reason to hug him. In the end he decides to just walk into your arms the next time he sees you, and surely enough you respond by giving him a firm squeeze and stroking his head as it rests on your shoulder. He'll always be asking for hugs now that you two are item, pulling you into his arms if he thinks it's been too long since you last gave him his fix.

i - injury (how would they act if they got hurt?)

At first when Adrian gets hurt around you, he plays it off as if he barely notices it, wanting to seem cool and tough and making sure you don't feel too worried about him. Even when he's bragging about how quickly he'll be healed up and back to normal, you still insist on cleaning up his cuts, and as you gently lift his chin with your finger and take such precious care delicately cleaning any wounds that haven't healed themselves yet, he'll kick himself for not letting you do this more often, being the focus of your attention, his favourite place to be. He'll quickly start acting like more and more of a baby when he gets hurt, insisting that you and only you patch him up, working up the nerve to ask you to kiss that little cut on his lip better.

When you get hurt, holy shit does this boy panic. He doesn't know how serious any pain is in someone who doesn't heal like him, so he constantly offers to drive you to the hospital, not calming down until you give him a little task to do instead so he can feel helpful.

j - jealousy (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they're jealous?)

Despite being such an objectively incredibly gifted person physically, Adrian has had a tough time making people like him in his life, which leaves him feeling pretty insecure about himself. So when he sees someone he thinks is a lot more 'normal' than him talking to you, he can't help but feel distraught that they can offer you a better life than he ever could. He thinks he is the luckiest person in the world for having landed someone as perfect as you, so it makes sense that his luck would run out at some point, forcing himself to at least slink over and find out a bit more about the person that's come to take you away from him. When you feel him approach, looking a bit sorry for himself, you make sure to tug his arm around your waist and introduce him as your boyfriend with the proudest smile you can, watching as his eyes brighten at the sound of your voice and a matching smile grows on his cheeks as he plants a huge kiss on yours.

Thankfully Adrian is probably too oblivious for anyone else to flirt with him, so you'll only experience jealousy when he talks devotedly about Peacemaker.

k- kisses (what are their kisses like? where do they like to be kissed?)

Oh my god, the first time you kiss Adrian, the vigilante has never been more caught off guard in his life. It doesn't matter how much flirting you've done, how many times your loving gaze has flicked between his eyes and his lips, the moment you press a soft, sweet peck to his little pouting lips, his brain is completely shutting down. Even the slightest kiss is so special to him that he thinks it's more likely you did it by accident than you actually want him to kiss you too. It will take you explicitly explaining that you have feelings for him and that you want to kiss him before he feels able to kiss you too, and by then he's smiling so widely he needs ten minutes to calm down before he even can.

Once you pass the newfound territory of little pecks whenever he sees you, moving to more intimate, open-mouthed, fingertips trailing through hair, full-bodied kissing behind closed doors, Adrian is like a man possessed. His usually very active mouth is finally quiet long enough to capture yours, pulling you into his lap where he can feel your full weight lean against him, a hungry marathon of sloppy kisses capturing your lips, moaning against you in overwhelming excitement. You can try and move your lips to his neck and mark him as your own, but as much as he loves the feelings of you bruising his skin, he finds himself whimpering until he can taste your sweet kiss again.

l - love language (what is their love language?)

Adrian likes to show and receive love through touch, the way he constantly keeps a hand on you as a reminder he's nearby and watching your back is his way of showing love all day. And when you lean in for a kiss and place your hand on his thigh, his heart feels like it's being wrapped in a soft woolen blanket, letting him know how much you truly care for him.

He loves to do little acts of service for you as well, like tidying things up around you if you've cooked him dinner, or picking something up on his way over to you because you mentioned being low of it last time he visited - he feels so at home with you, that he wants you to feel like your home is better for him being a part of it.

As well as the undeniable thrill he gets from the way you touch him, he's also a real sucker for words of affirmation. He's rarely been on the receiving end of kind words, and the important people in his life often seem embarrassed to acknowledge him and admit to knowing him, so when you unashamedly say you love him in front of the whole team, or call him your boyfriend when you pick him up from his day job, or tell him that something he's done is good and helpful, he feels over the moon and loved to his core.

m - mornings (how are mornings spent with them?)

Adrian feels like the kind of guy who is constantly a ball of pure energy. He wakes up fully alert and stacked to the brim with enthusiasm when he opens his eyes and has woken up next to his favourite person in the whole world. He wants so desperately to be considerate and let you rest, but he can't stop himself from practically vibrating with glee at the mere sight of you. He'll leave it as long as he can take it before he gently traces a finger over your skin, his heart fluttering from the tiny bit of contact before finally your eyes flutter open to the biggest smile you've ever seen. Once you're awake be prepared to get tackled into a huge hug, his mouth suddenly racing at a thousand words a minute telling you how much he missed you while he was asleep and how pretty you are in the morning and how even your snoring is cute. He could happily stay in bed with you forever, so you'll have to be the one to drag him out of bed and into the kitchen for breakfast, where he'll continue clinging to you for dear life.

n - nights (how are nights spent with them?)

Adrian's always been a night owl, given so much of his patrols and missions take place at night. He much prefers the nights he spends with you though, trying to find a few hours of peace in an otherwise chaotic life. He likes that it's time that the two of you usually get to spend alone together, curled up in each other's arms with no plans you don't want and nowhere else you need to be except together. When you two crawl into bed, he loves to lay in the dark and just look at your features in the dimmest of moonlight, telling you his silliest thoughts, and some of the deep ones he feels too vulnerable to say with the lights on, never letting you fall asleep without a reminder of how much you mean to him and how much happier his life is with you in it.

o - open (when would they start revealing things about themselves? do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Adrian has absolutely no filter when it comes to talking about his life, telling you everything you want to know, and a bunch of stuff you didn't even ask long before the two of you have even been on a date. In his mind, you're one of the first people that's ever seemed genuinely interested in him, and he wants to make the most of that before he inevitably reveals something about himself that will scare you off like he does with everyone else. The one thing he'd struggle to come out and tell you initially is just how much you mean to him. The feelings are so new and scary that he's sure there's no way you could feel the same, so you would have to be the one to put yourself out there and let him know he's bewitched your whole heart.

p - patience (how patient are they usually? what tends to wear their patience thin?)

Thanks to all his training, patrolling, staking out locations, and worst of all having to work in a restaurant, Vigilante is surprisingly patient. He's more than happy to wait forever if it makes things less stressful for you, and he'd give up every second of his time to help you do something, he really is just that devoted. He only starts to get impatient when the two of you are apart, and it feels like his soul is aching to get back to your arms.

q - quality time (how do they like to spend with you?)

At first Adrian feels a lot of pressure to always be having the exciting kind of fun with you, suggesting lots of different date ideas and never wanting you to have a dull moment around him. It would take a bit of work for you to have him get used to just spending a night in with you, cuddled up together and doing very little, finally getting the idea in his head that you could never get bored of him. He still prefers to go out for dates with you most of the time, loving sitting at a bar or diner with someone who only wants to be with him, but that doesn't mean he doesn't adore the days the two of you spend every hour just talking in bed about nothing.

r - remember (what is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

Because of the need to protect his identity, most of Adrian's interactions (even some of the most intimate ones) have been from behind his helmet, leaving him feeling a lot less confident in his face than he is in the rest of his body. Given you met him as Vigilante first, he was worried that you were disappointed the first time you saw the face under his mask, unable to read your expression by the time he put his glasses back on. He'd be very happy that your feelings for him grew despite that, but there would always be a voice in the back of his head that thought you liked him better with his helmet on.

So the first time the two of you were locked in your usual prolonged make out sessions and you hinted at going further than kissing, he immediately made the offer before you could ask for it;

"Do you want me to put my helmet back on?" The question would stop you dead in your tracks, trying to read his almost apologetic expression as you replied.

"That would make it pretty difficult to kiss you." You watched his eyes drift down to your lap as he struggled to make his case.

"But it means you only have to look at the best parts of me." His muscles seem to flex beneath you as if to assume that's what you want from him, the parts of him he can't work out feeling like a short-coming.

"I think every part of you is the best Adrian." His eyes snap up at your words, searching your gaze for deception or mocking and finding nothing but sweetness. "And I love your face." You trace a finger over his features as if considering each one and coming to only the happiest conclusion, "I like your eyes, and your glasses, and your nose, and your smile, and you're a good kisser, so overall your face is pretty damn important to me." With each soft touch he feels years of insecurity melt away, any self doubt dissolving under your loving gaze until he can't stand to not be kissing you a second longer, lifting you into his arms as he does and carrying towards the bedroom as quickly as his legs can manage after you've all but turned them to jelly.

s - security (how protective are they? how would they protect you? how would they like to be protected?)

Adrian knows just how dangerous the world can be (although a big chunk of that danger comes from him personally) so he would feel incredibly protective of you from the first time you met. He likes being able to use his strength and skills to keep you safe, and make you feel like you're secure as long as he's around you, wanting to give you every reason to keep him close. He'd insist on escorting you everywhere he could, keeping an arm around you once he feels able to touch you that way. He feels especially lucky when you let him sleep over and he can watch over you while you sleep, making sure you have only the sweetest dreams.

It may not feel like you can do too much to protect a man like Vigilante, but everything you do makes him feel like nothing in the world can get to him. Your loving words and supportive encouragement protect him from the cruel teasing of others, and he knows that his sensitve heart is safe now that it belongs to you.

t - try (how much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Adrian's waited a long time to have someone finally feel the way you do about him, and he would want to go out of his way every single day to show you how much he appreciates it. His efforts might sometimes come from a strange direction or be a bit misguided, but you will never feel like he takes you for granted, and he'll never be the kind to let an occasion pass without marking it. He'd love putting in effort every day with you, because the domestic life the two of you build together would make him so happy that doing the smallest jobs in your little home would feel like such an honour.

u - upset (how do they act when you're upset? how do they act when they're upset?)

Vigilante doesn't get upset very often, so when he does it's very easy to notice. The big warning sign is that he'll get very quiet, a real contrast to his usual monologue of adoration. He doesn't usually tell you what's wrong until you ask, worried about burdening you with something silly, but when you pull his head against your chest and rub his back softly, all his feelings will come pouring out, suddenly feeling so much lighter when he has your reassurance.

When you're upset Adrian is very quick to assume he's done something wrong, so he would be very quick to try and make up for it. It would be hard to stay sad about anything as he runs around desperately parading gifts in front of you and telling all his worst jokes until eventually you reassure him that you still love him and that it's something else bothering you, at which point he would collapse and cuddle you and make sure you had all your favourite things for as long as you need. (although the jokes don't stop)

v - vanity (how concerned are they with their looks?)

Adrian's owned the same four outfits for his entire adulthood and never really thinks about the way he looks out of his vigilante costume. He works out a lot and feels pretty good about that, but when you gently push his glasses up the bridge of his nose first thing in the morning, leaving a kiss of the bridge of it and beaming up at him, he'd start to feel pretty good about his looks too.

w - wildcard (a random headcanon for them.)

One of Adrian's favourite things in the world is when you come and pick him up from his day job at Fennel Fields. Sometimes he feels like his colleagues think he's a weird loser and he can't tell them anything else about himself for fear of giving his identity today (since he's kind of terrible at lying) so he can start to feel quite down about himself when he has his shifts there. Luckily all it takes is a split second glimpse of you as he's clearing his final tables for the day, and suddenly he feels like the biggest hero in the galaxy, racing to get finished so he can practically sprint out the door and into your arms. Sure it doesn't hurt if his colleagues see that he has an incredible partner who cares enough about him to come meet him after work, but what they think stops mattering to him the second he's basking in the light of your presence.

x - x-ray (how easily are they able to read you?)

He's reasonably oblivious when it comes to reading just about anyone, and unfortunately that can apply to you too. You have to be pretty careful about telling him when you're being sarcastic or when he's done something you don't like, but luckily he's very quick to ask questions and check in with how you are, so the two of you would quickly find the best way to communicate.

y - yuck (what things do you do that they hate?)

Sometimes Adrian worries about the way you see the best in people, his black and white view of the world telling him that most people can't be trusted. That and when you break even the tiniest law (jaw-walking, speeding slightly, parked on double yellows for five seconds to pick him up) and he'd have to face his own hypocrisy because he knows he could never punish you.

z - zzz (what is a sleep habit of theirs?)

Adrian wakes up a lot in the night because of how alert he is all the time. He tries to be careful about waking you, but sometimes when he gets up in his head worrying that something will happen to you and he can't get back to sleep, he'll shake you gently by the shoulder until you turn around and let him burrow under the blankets to lie against your chest, suddenly feel so much more at rest when your arms are wrapped around him, sleepily stroking over his back.

#writing #fanfiction #requests #one shot #adrian chase smut #adrian chase x y/n #adrian chase x reader #adrian chase imagines #adrian chase #peacemaker headcanons #peacemaker #peacemaker vigilante #vigilante imagines #vigilante x reader #vigilante smut #vigilante #vigilante fluff #adrian chase fluff

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yakichoufd · 5 months ago

Note

The show scott is also my favourite so what comics would you recommend that fit that archetype?

I will recommend the comics I really enjoyed and I think they still fit his archetype (warning: I barely read comics were Scott is an adult haha! So it is mostly about teen Scott or young adult Scott): Classic x-men #41-#42 in these two issues he doesn't have his power yet but you can already he has a strong sense of justice. He is also a sweet bean there who deserves a lot of hugs (which he kind of get...i guess...but at what cost Y-Y) Marvel snapshot X-men a really interesting take on how he get his powers and how he tries to fit in the world (which is already hard when you are a normal teenager) X-Men: Children of the Atom a 6 issues story where you see how the original 5 joined the team. He is not a leader yet but he takes few directive that are interesting and he can make some good speech if needed (but these comics are more interesting about how he lived with Jack Winter and how he got saved from him) Cyclops (2014) a serie of young Cyclops living his best life with his space pirate dad. He is very much a sweetheart and has quite some clever moments when he needs to save his dear papa. Cyclops (2010) it is an oneshot crack story but Scott is well portrayed even if it is to make jokes. It is a fun solo comic! The adventures of Cyclops and Phoenix a 4 issues story with little Nathan. It is quite intense to read, and if you do not know who Nathan and Rachel is, or who Apocalypse is, it can be super confusing (and even with some understanding, there are some parts I could not completely follow) but Scott can be a papa and it is very sweet. X-men first class Road trips it is more focus on the original 5 and I did not enjoy everything about that serie, I didn't really enjoy the art style (but I think many will find it pretty) or the writing , but there is one scene I enjoyed dearly! It is when they are all powerless and Scott still shows his quick way of thinking and how he can save the day without powers. But I find most of the writing very clumsy. Champions (2016 + #5 from 2019) teen Scott joins the Champions and finally experience some fun times. His friendship with Miss Marvel is cute. And that's about it for now! I might add more to that list after I finished reading more comics (I've quite a big pile waiting to be read haha)! Hopefully you'll enjoy some of my recommendation! And if anyone wants to share theirs, I'd love to read about it!

#cyclops #scott summers #ask response

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ineffable-endearments · 9 months ago

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The Crow Road by Iain Banks

I finished The Crow Road and had a little time to think about it. I'll put my thoughts under a Keep Reading in case anyone is trying to avoid spoilers.

As I speculated before, I think it's likely that The Crow Road is more related to Good Omens in philosophy than in plot. I mean, it's not that the plots necessarily have nothing in common, and we could be very surprised in the end of course, but now that I've read the whole book, its philosophical commonalities with GO are both apparent and kind of inspiring. Also, if I were a writer, I'd be more interested in dropping hints about what themes are important than telegraphing my whole plot ahead of time.

So here, I will describe the book and point out themes that I believe may reappear in Good Omens 3.

This is a long post. If you read it, make a cup of [beverage of choice].

Update on 4/20/2024: I made a second post: The Crow Road and Good Omens: Further-Out Thoughts

Below are mentions of suicide, death/murder, and sexual acts.

The Crow Road centers around a character named Prentice McHoan, a university student in Scotland who starts to sort out his complicated relationship with his complicated family as he explores the mystery of his uncle Rory's disappearance. Although the book is mostly from Prentice's perspective, the narration jumps around in time with the McHoan family. There are quite a lot of important characters to keep track of; the bare-bones summary I put below doesn't even include some of the important ones. I wanted to make the summary even shorter and simpler than this, but the truth is that this book is not short or simple, and if I made the summary any simpler, it might be downright misleading.

There are at least three major cultural aspects of The Crow Road that I am inexperienced with: the overall culture in the 1950s-1980s (I was born in 1988, so of course wasn't here for the relevant decades), the international experience of the Gulf War (again, born in 1988), and the history and culture of Scotland itself (I'm USAmerican with only reading as a source). As a result, I'm sure there are important dimensions to the book that I've missed. If someone has a different perspective taking some of these things into account, I'd love to know about it.

Also, keep in mind, there is a great deal of descriptive writing in this book. There are a lot of pages about the geography of Scotland, and about Prentice as a kid, and about Prentice's father and uncles hanging out together in their youth, and about various family incidents, and about Prentice spending time with his brothers and friends. At first, these passages seem to just make things more confusing, and in my head, I accused them of being "filler." But they definitely serve a purpose. They're a way of showing and not telling the characters' attitudes and relationships to each other. More importantly, because we get to actually live these experiences with the characters, they are what give all the plot points below their deeper emotional impacts. In other words, the everyday experiences give the plot its deeper meaning. They resonate with one of the core themes in the novel: that our experiences in life, rather than any supposed existence after death, are what matters.

The Crow Road's story is like this:

Prentice is rather directionless in life, and he seems to have trouble investing any energy in his own future as he moons over his unrequited feelings for an idealized young woman named Verity. Soon, Verity ends up in a romance with Prentice's brother, Lewis, and Prentice feels that Lewis "stole" her from him. Prentice has also become estranged from his father, Kenneth, over spirituality. Prentice believes there has to be something more after death because he feels it would be incredibly unfair if people didn't get anything other than this one life; Kenneth is not only a passionate atheist, but is offended by the notion of an afterlife.

Prentice's uncle Hamish, Kenneth's brother, has always been religious, although his religion involves a number of bizarre and offbeat ideas of his own, with inspiration from more traditional Christian notions. Prentice is not really sure about this ideology, but he's willing to talk to Hamish about it and even participates during Hamish's prayers, whereas Kenneth is openly scornful of Hamish's beliefs. Hamish interprets this as Prentice being on "his side."

Prentice has a few opportunities to go back and talk to his father, and is begged to do so by his mom, Mary, with whom his relationship is still good. Mary doesn't want either of the men to give up their inner ideas about the universe; she just wants them to agree to disagree and move on as a family. Prentice says he will visit, but he just keeps putting it off and off and off.

Prentice acquires a folder containing some of his missing uncle Rory's notes in the process of hooking up with Rory's former girlfriend, Janice Rae, who seems to have taken a shine to Prentice because he reminds her of Rory. Using the contents of the folder, Prentice wants to piece together the great literary work that Rory left unfinished, which Rory titled Crow Road; however, it becomes apparent that Rory didn't turn his concepts into anything substantial and only had a bunch of disconnected notes and ideas. He hadn't even decided whether Crow Road would be a novel, a play, or something else. The few bits of Rory's poetry for Crow Road read are bleak and depressing.

Prentice also spends a lot of time with a young woman named Ash. They've been good friends since childhood and seem to have a somewhat flirtatious dynamic now, but they aren't in a romantic relationship; mostly, they drink and hang out together. Ash tells Prentice bluntly to get his life back on track when she finds out he's failing at school, avoiding his family, and engaging in shoplifting. She is a voice of reason, and when Prentice insists to her that he's just a failure, she reminds him that actually, he's just a kid.

Prentice's efforts to figure out Rory's story or location stagnate, and he continues to fail at school and avoid his father. He then receives word that Kenneth was killed while debating faith with Hamish. In fact, Kenneth dies after a fall from a church lightning rod, which he was climbing in an act of defiance against Hamish's philosophy when it was struck by lightning; Hamish is convinced that Kenneth had incurred God's wrath. Ash is there for support when Prentice finds out about the death.

With Ash's help, Prentice returns to his hometown again to help manage Kenneth's affairs. Prentice speaks with a very shaken Hamish, who is handling Kenneth's death with extreme drama and making it all about his own feelings. Hamish tells Prentice that Kenneth was jealous that Prentice shared more in common with Hamish's faith than with Kenneth's lack of faith. However, this isn't really true, and as he contemplates his father's death, Prentice begins to internalize one of the last things Hamish reported that Kenneth had argued: "All the gods are false. Faith itself is idolatry."

As the chapters go on, Prentice is compelled by some of the meaningful items related to Rory that he discovers in his father's belongings. He gains a renewed sense of purpose trying to solve the mystery of where Rory went and what happened to him. Among the interesting items are an ancient computer disk of Rory's that Prentice can't access with any equipment he can find; Ash uses her connections in the US and Canada to find a computer expert who can finally open the files on it. This takes quite a while, since the disk has to be mailed and Ash's connection is investigating the disk only in his free time.

Prentice also discovers that his feelings for Verity have changed. He no longer feels angry with Lewis for "stealing her." At first, Prentice's narration describes this as his feelings "cooling" as a result of the trauma of losing his father, but interestingly, this soon means Prentice gets to know Verity as a sister-in-law without getting caught up in jealous romantic feelings. Verity gets along well with the family, and Prentice is actually happy to discover that she and Lewis have a baby on the way. Prentice's relationship with Lewis improves greatly as well, partly because he is no longer jealous and partly because he realizes he does not want to lose Lewis, too.

Ash's connection who was looking at Rory's computer disk comes through and sends the printed contents of the files to Prentice. The files reveal to him that Rory likely knew Prentice's uncle, Fergus, murdered his wife by unbuckling her seat belt and crashing their car. Rory had written out a fictional version of events and considered using it in Crow Road. I'm not clear on exactly how certain Rory was about Fergus's crime, or whether Rory would have intentionally reported Ferg, or whether Rory even had enough proof to publicly accuse Ferg of murder, but people would likely have connected the dots in Rory's work and become suspicious of Ferg. For this reason, Prentice believes Ferg murdered Rory as well.

Prentice confronts Ferg. He doesn't get a confession and leaves Ferg's home with no concrete proof of anything; Ferg denies it all. But Prentice is soon physically assaulted in the night, and it seems Ferg was almost certainly the culprit, because he hadn't been home that same night, and he had injuries (probably from being fought off) the next day. A day or two later, Ferg's body is found unconscious in the cockpit of a plane, which crashes into the ocean. It's uncertain whether this was a suicide, but Prentice suspects it was. Rory's body is then soon recovered from the bottom of a waterway near Prentice's home, where Ferg had sunk it years ago.

As the mysteries are solved, Prentice realizes his feelings for Ash are romantic love. However, it's too late, he thinks, because Ash is about to take a job in Canada, where she may or may not stay. Prentice also hesitates to approach her because he's embarrassed about his previous behavior, venting all his angst about Verity and his father. He isn't sure she would even want to be in a relationship with him after that. But the very night before Ash leaves, she kisses Prentice on the cheek, which leads to a deeper kiss. They finally connect, have sex, and confess their mutual feelings. Ash still goes to her job in Canada, but says she'll come back when Prentice is done with his studies that summer.

The relationship's future is somewhat uncertain because something could come up while Ash is in Canada, but Prentice is hopeful. The book ends with Prentice getting ready to graduate with his grades on track as a history scholar, fully renouncing his belief in an afterlife while he acknowledges the inherent importance of our experiences in our lives now, and enjoying his time with Lewis and Verity and his other family members.

What's the point of all these hundreds of pages?

Well, look at all of the above; there's definitely more than one point. But the main point I took away is that we get this one life, with our loved ones in this world here and now, and this is where we make our meanings. There is no other meaning, but that doesn't mean there's no meaning at all. It means the meaning is here.

It's not death that gives life its meaning. It's the things we do while alive that give life its deeper meaning.

The Crow Road is described (on Wikipedia) as a Bildungsroman, a story focusing on the moral and philosophical growth and change of its main character as they transition from childhood to adulthood ("coming-of-age novel" is a similar term that is interchangeable, but more vague and not necessarily focused on morality/philosophy). And, indeed, all of the plots ultimately tie into Prentice's changed philosophy.

After his argument with Kenneth, Prentice feels childish and humiliated, and as a result, he refuses to go back home, which leads to a spiral of shame and depression. Kenneth dies and Prentice realizes it's too late to repair the relationship, which also leads him to realize it's what we do in life that matters, and that therefore, his father's argument was correct after all.

At the end of the novel, Prentice outright describes his new philosophy. However, I can't recall one specific passage where Prentice describes the process of how he changed his mind (if anyone else can remember something I missed, do let me know). There is, however, a moment when his narration indicates that Hamish seems less disturbed by his own part in the incident that led to Kenneth's death and more disturbed by the notion that his beliefs might actually be true: there might actually be an angry, vengeful God. In other words, Hamish's philosophy is selfish at its core.

My interpretation is that when his father died, Prentice realized three things: how utterly self-serving Hamish's devout faith is, how Kenneth's untimely death proves the importance of working things out now rather than in an imaginary afterlife, and how much profound meaning Kenneth had left behind despite having no faith at all. After these realizations, a determined belief in an afterlife no longer makes our lives here more profound like Prentice once thought it did.

Also, it's worth noting that this incident changes Prentice's idea of partnership, too. He loses interest in this distant, idealized woman he's been after. In love as in the rest of life, Prentice lets go of his ideals, and in doing so, he makes room for true meaning, both in a sincere familial, platonic connection with Verity and a sincere intimate, romantic connection with Ash.

But what about the sex scene?!

Yes, indeed, at the tail end of the story, Prentice and Ash have sex and admit they want to be in a relationship together. Prentice's narration describes them sleeping together and having intercourse not just once, but many times, including some slow and relaxed couplings during which they flex the muscles in their private parts to spell out "I.L.Y." and "I.L.Y.T." to each other in Morse code. This is relevant because earlier, they had been surprised and delighted to discover that they both knew Morse code; it isn't a detail that came from nowhere.

I didn't get the impression that this scene was trying to be especially titillating to the reader. It was mostly just a list of stuff the characters did together. I felt the point was that they were still anxious about being emotionally honest, a little desperate to convey their feelings without having to speak them out loud, and awkward in a way that made it obvious that their primary concern was the feelings, not the sexual performance. They cared about each other, but they weren't trying to be impressive or put on a show; contrast this with previous scenes where Prentice would act like a clown in front of Ash to diffuse his own anxiety. I've always thought that being able to have awkward sex and still enjoy it is a good sign.

Okay, so what does this all have to do with Good Omens?

Here's where I have to get especially interpretive. I'm doing my best, but of course, not everyone reading this will have the same perspective on Good Omens, the Final Fifteen especially. I believe similar themes are going to resonate between The Crow Road and Good Omens regardless of our particular interpretations of the characters' behavior and motivations, but I suppose it could hit differently for some people.

The TL;DR: I see similar themes between The Crow Road and Good Omens in:

The importance of mortal life on Earth

Meaning (or purpose) as something that we create as we live, not something that is handed to us by a supreme being

Sincere connection and love/passion (for people, causes, arts, life's work, etc) as a type of meaning/purpose

Relationships as reflections of philosophy

The dual nature of humanity

Life on Earth as the important part of existence is a core theme in Good Omens, and has been since the very beginning. We all already know Adam chose to preserve the world as it already is because he figured this out, and we all already know Aziraphale and Crowley have been shaped for the better by their experiences on Earth. But Good Omens isn't done with this theme by a long shot. I think this is the most important thematic commonality Good Omens will have with The Crow Road. Closely related is the notion that we create our meanings as we live, rather than having them handed to us. Isn't this, in a way, what Aziraphale struggles with in A Companion to Owls? He's been given this meaning, this identity, that doesn't fit him. But does he have anything else to be? Not yet.

Partnerships as a parallel to the characters' philosophical development also resonates as a commonality that The Crow Road may have with Good Omens. Prentice's obsession with Verity goes away when he starts to embrace the importance of life on Earth and makes room for his sincere relationship with Ash. Note their names: "Verity" is truth, an ideal Prentice's father instills in him; "Ashley" means "dweller in the ash tree meadow" in Anglo-Saxon, according to Wikipedia, and "ash" is one of the things people return to after death. Prentice literally trades his high ideals for life on Earth. We see in Aziraphale a similar tug-o'-war between Heaven's distant ideals and Crowley's Earthly pleasures, so I can see a similar process potentially playing out for him.

I don't particularly recall a ton of thematic exploration of free will in The Crow Road. However, there is a glimmer of something there: Prentice feels excessively controlled by Kenneth's desire to pass down his beliefs, and part of the reason Prentice is so resistant to change is simply his frustration with feeling censored and not being taken seriously. As the reader, I do get the feeling that while Prentice is immature, Kenneth made major mistakes in handling their conflict, too. And Kenneth's mistakes come from trying to dictate Prentice's thoughts. There is likely some crossover with Good Omens in the sense that I'm pretty sure both stories are going to take the position that people need to be allowed to make mistakes, and to do things that one perceives as mistakes, without getting written off as "stupid" or "bad" or otherwise "unworthy."

Suffice it to say that the human characters in Good Omens will also certainly play into these themes, but it's hard to write about them when we don't know much about them except that one of them is almost certainly the reincarnation of Jesus. This also makes me suspect perhaps the human cast will be 100% entirely all-new, or mostly new, symbolic of how Aziraphale and Crowley have immersed themselves in the ever-evolving, ever-changing world of life on Earth. Alternatively, if we encounter human characters again from Season 1 or 2, perhaps the ways they've grown and changed will be highlighted. For example, even in real-world time, Adam and Warlock have already, as of the time I'm writing this, gone through at least one entire life stage (from 11 in 2019 to 16 in 2024). They'll be legal adults in a couple of years, and if there's a significant time skip, they could be much older. If characters from Season 1 do reappear and themes from The Crow Road are prominent, I would expect either some key scenes highlighting contrasts and changes from their younger selves or for stagnation and growth to be a central part of their plot.

The more I write, the more I just interpret everything in circles. Hopefully this post has at least given you a decent idea of what The Crow Road is like and how it may relate to Good Omens.

I'll end this post with a quotation that feels relevant:

Telling us straight or through his stories, my father taught us that there was, generally, a fire at the core of things, and that change was the only constant, and that we – like everybody else – were both the most important people in the universe, and utterly without significance, depending, and that individuals mattered before their institutions, and that people were people, much the same everywhere, and when they appeared to do things that were stupid or evil, often you hadn’t been told the whole story, but that sometimes people did behave badly, usually because some idea had taken hold of them and given them an excuse to regard other people as expendable (or bad), and that was part of who we were too, as a species, and it wasn’t always possible to know that you were right and they were wrong, but the important thing was to keep trying to find out, and always to face the truth. Because truth mattered. Iain Banks, The Crow Road

#good omens #the crow road #good omens book club #go3 speculation #s3 speculation #good omens 2 spoilers #go s2 spoilers

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