#but despite the (obvious) bald part of it

[sokkabaddiebender2021]

an opinion i will defend to the grave will be that zuko’s ponytail ATE in both the og show and in the netflix live action. no more explanation will be given to that statement (i will most definitely proceed to do that in the tags)

[dyns33]

Obvious

Most of the time I see him as the cool silly big bro, but I love Deadpool, so here's a long Deadpool x female reader.

Normally nothing destined Y/N to meet Wade Wilson.

A normal life, without enemies, without superpowers, without contracts on her head. She didn't fight, respected the law (at least for the most serious and important things) and she considered herself to be a good person.

The first time she had passed Saint Agnes Orphanage, she hadn't really paid it much attention. The second time, she found it a little strange that an orphanage was in this part of the city, which was not really made for children.

Then one evening, when she had had a bad day, she realized that it was a bar and she decided to go in for a drink.

Since she thought an orphanage was strange in that place, she might have thought it was odd for a bar to have such a name. She could also have been scared when she saw the other customers, who all turned towards her, indicating that she might not be welcome.

But Y/N was tired, and she just wanted a drink before going home, so she smiled politely as she sat down at the counter.

The waiter frowned, but he agreed to serve her with a shrug, muttering that as long as she was an adult, it wasn't his problem.

A tall, bald, tattooed guy then approached her, putting a hand on her arm without worrying about her private space, asking her if she wanted to follow him home.

"… No thanks."

“Come on, don’t be a slut.”

"Please."

“Come with me, you stupid bitch.”

"Now, that's really not very nice. The lady said no, a gentleman should know it's time to leave. But no Hector, not only are you insisting, but you're being rude."

"Fuck you, Wade, don't get involved in this !"

The waiter continued to mumble about cleaning, while this Wade guy smashed Hector's head against the counter. A tooth even flew close to Y/N’s face.

That might have been enough to scare her completely. In addition to the surge of violence that was happening right next to her, there was the red suit, the katanas and other guns, which could make you want to flee as quickly as possible.

But when he finished kicking Hector's ass, Wade turned to her, and despite the mask, it was obvious that he was smiling, extending a hand towards her.

"Miss, my apologies for that boor. He knows nothing of good manners."

"… Thank you."

"You're very welcome, lovely angel ! Wade Wilson, Deadpool, Merc with a mouth, at your service ! Oh, he spilled your drink… Bad Hector ! Or was it me ? Maybe it was me. Weasel, the same for the little lady, on my note !”

“You already owe me a fortune.”

“I will kill whoever you want for free !”

“I thought you didn’t kill anymore.”

"Ah yes… I'll suck you for free !"

“Here you go, two drinks, just shup up Wade.”

In the end, Wade was a bit special, but not evil. He stayed with her, partly because he loved having someone to talk to, but also to make sure no one else was going to bother her again.

And he talked a lot. Everything he said didn't always make sense, he even seemed to be talking to himself sometimes, but he was funny. It seemed to please him that Y/N laughed at his jokes. Behind the counter, Weasel was still muttering that she was doing something silly.

Among the long tirade he delivered that evening, she understood that Wade had not had an easy life. That he had done some things that could make him a criminal, but he had been trying to improve for some time.

"Colossus already wanted me to become an X-men but it wasn't for me. Wait, there are X-men in this universe ? I do not know anymore. Anyway, there's Spidey and Devy. No, he's right, this nickname isn't great, Devil. Like Daredevil. They want us to be Team Red, but only if I stop unliving people. It's not fair because they're friends with Frank, and Frank keeps unliving people, but he lost his wife and his kids, so I guess he has more sympathy points than me."

"I don't understand everything, but I guess Spidey is Spiderman ?"

"Yes ! He's super cool ! And his ass ! People confuse us sometimes, it annoys me, but it's a bit of a compliment. He's my role model."

Like a true superhero, Deadpool insisted on taking her home. He was terribly honest, saying that he could leave her a few blocks away, but that was useless, because as a former mercenary, he was very good at stalking people and he could find her address without difficulty, even if he only had her name.

"Which I wouldn't do ! Normally. I might want to see you again, and ask Weasel to find your number, but I know myself, I'll put it in my phone, and I'll hesitate for weeks, then I'll send a lousy message, you'll be scared, you'll block me, I'll be ashamed and I'll shoot myself in the head because I'm a moron."

“I can give you my number.”

"And I… Huh ? Huh ?! For real ?!" exclaimed Wade, jumping like a child on Christmas Day.

Wade called her right away, specifying that it was not to verify that she was giving him a false number but a little. Despite the mask, his face showed surprise when he saw that she hadn't lied.

"I should put a bullet in my head to make sure I'm not dreaming."

“You wouldn’t wake up.”

“Baby girl, we only just met, there are a lot of things you don’t know about me.”

When Deadpool talked about shooting himself, he meant it literally. It often happened that he died, either because of an enemy, an accident, or by his own hand. But he always came back. A gift like a curse.

They became friends. It was obvious, and quite sad, that Wade didn't have many friends.

Most people around him couldn't stand him or were afraid of him. It was true that he could be quite unpredictable, especially when he got lost in his discussions with the boxes, or an imaginary audience. But he was never mean.

Weasel was more of a collaborator, Al was forced to accommodate him, and the other heroes, unable to get rid of him, tried to make him a nice guy.

And he was really nice. Crazy but adorable, funny and wanting to do well.

Very quickly, Y/N started to have a crush, and even more. Even after seeing him without a mask. He never took it off completely to eat, repeating that he didn't want her to lose her appetite or feel like throwing up.

But after landing in a trash can after a fight, and forgetting that he had invited her to watch Princess Bride, Y/N had seen him. Yes, his scars were a bit impressive, but they weren't that bad.

With an embarrassed smile, he waved his hand while remaining frozen near the entrance.

"… I can move if you want to run away. I won't follow you. I may look like Frankenstein's monster, but I only pursue young girls who ask me to. Or who deserve it. Because criminals have no gender, I don't discriminate."

“I brought popcorn.” was her only reaction.

"... Oh. Sweet ? Salty ? Caramel ? Al must have beer somewhere, hidden with the cocaine."

After that, he was a little less afraid to show his face, even though it was obvious he wasn't comfortable. It wasn't easy to reassure him, repeating that she didn't care about his appearance.

Y/N didn’t remember how they ended up having this conversation. The only thing she knew was that she was pressed against him, laughing, when she had innocently said it would be fun if they went out together.

This made Wade laugh, but a very serious laugh, leaving no chance and hitting where it hurt.

"You and me ? Ah ! No chance."

"Why ?"

"It's obvious."

A simple little sentence could sometimes do a lot of damage. Too busy making fun of the characters on the screen, Wade didn't see Y/N's look of sadness, just as he didn't feel her body stiffen.

Still, she should have expected this response. Of course it was obvious that they had nothing to do together. Deadpool was a super hero (in training), he was tall, muscular, funny, rich.

She had seen photos of his deceased ex, Vanessa. She had observed him flirting with beautiful women and men before. It was already fortunate that she was only friends with him.

So Y/N swallowed her pride, accepting the obvious, and not talking about the subject again.

But it was hard, because the more time passed, the stronger the feelings became.

It was even harder when Wade entered his depressive phases. He kept putting himself down, insulting himself and accepting insults from the boxes in his head. It took a lot of patience and perseverance to get him to put down his gun.

"Anyway, I'll come back later. Bad luck for the world. People would be happier if I wasn't here anymore. Maybe they'll miss me a little, for a few minutes."

“I would miss you, Wade.”

"Yeah… You say that because you're adorable, baby girl. But you'd be better off without me too. I'm a real drag."

“You saved me the first time we met.”

"And since then you think you owe me a debt. You know, every time we're in the street, the others look at me and they're afraid. If I wasn't there, you could be with them. You could have lots of friends.”

"I don't want lots of friends, Wade." Y/N sighed, taking him into her arms. “I’m glad we’re friends.”

“Oh, sweetie pie, me too !”

It was rarer for them to find themselves in the opposite situation. Not because Deadpool wasn't capable of empathy, but because she didn't like talking about her problems, preferring to keep everything to herself and cry out of sight.

Unfortunately, she had made the decision to become friends with a former mercenary who loved to jump from roof to roof, only to come visit without warning by tapping on the window.

Y/N had no time to hide her tears, holding back a sob as her eyes met those of Wade, who had stopped mid-movement, fist raised against his window.

He didn't hesitate before entering, terribly serious.

"Who ? Who did this ?"

“Wade…”

"Who made my baby girl cry ? I want a name. Spidey and Dev will understand. Yellow wants decapitation, White wants emasculation. Tell me who."

"It's really not necessary. It's not important."

“It’s important if you cry.” Deadpool growled as he looked around the apartment for clues.

Once he had an idea in his head, it was almost impossible to divert his attention. If it wasn't so important, it was possible with food or talking about Spiderman's butt. But this time he considered it very important.

Tired, Y/N thought that all she had to do was say that it was just a ridiculous heartbreak for him to calm down. He had no reason to kill someone just because they didn't love her back.

This actually seemed to calm him down a bit, as he patted his cheeks with his hands in a dramatic gesture.

"What ?! Someone doesn't love you ?! Someone doesn't like my sweet little angel ? Are they crazy or stupid. You deserve the best !"

"Actually… He's the one who's too good for me."

"Bullshit ! The important thing is love ! If a woman can marry a space duck, then everyone can be together, as long as it's legal and consensual !"

"… What ? No, wait, it doesn't matter. Wade, please forget it."

"A name. Let me prove to you that this fool doesn't deserve you, and not the other way around !"

"No."

"A name !"

"You ! It's you !"

For the first time since they met, Wade was silent for more than a minute, staring at her like he wasn't sure she was real. He often had hallucinations, so this happened to him.

Then he muttered incomprehensible things, probably speaking with his boxes to check that he had heard what she had just said.

"… Me ? As in, me ?"

“I know what you’re going to say.” Y/N sighed, wanting to disappear. "You've already said it, it's obvious that we're not meant to be together. You're charismatic, and strong, and funny, with powers. You save people, you have an extraordinary life, while I… I am me."

"… Baby girl. Do you have a fever ? Did you lose a bet ? Because… You saw me without a mask. You know I'm crazy and dangerous. There are several bounties on my head, I've unlived more people than the population of New York, and my favorite movie is Zoolander 2. When I said it was obvious… I meant that you were too good for me."

There had been a misunderstanding, each being convinced that the other could never want the other, because they were too different. But even though he was special, with skin problems and an inability to concentrate for more than ten minutes, Wade was much better than a space duck.

However, while she was sure of what she wanted, he hadn't clearly said what he expected next.

"I mean, if you just want to be friends, I'll understand."

"You can't tease me like that and then break my heart. Don't play with me, woman !"

“Wade…” Y/N sneered, as he gesticulated like a degenerate, declaiming his great love for her and her smile, the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

Taking advantage of his inattention, she approached him, until he froze when he felt her hands on his mask.

With a look, she asked him if she could take it off, and as he didn't move to stop her, she took it off first up to his nose, before hesitating.

Y/N didn’t want to make him uncomfortable, but she also didn’t want him to think that she didn’t want to see him if she didn’t go further. So she took out the whole mask, she observed Wade, smiling before kissing him.

"… Don't take what comes next as a bad thing." he whispered as their lips parted.

"What ?"

"I'm going to have a heart attack…"

As always, Y/N thought he was joking at first, until he collapsed in front of her, looking delighted even though his heart had stopped beating. Fortunately she was used to seeing him die, even if it was still a little traumatic.

It took almost an hour for him to wake up. Y/N had time to take a shower and make herself some tea, sitting on the couch to wait.

"Shit !" he shouted as he opened his eyes, looking around the apartment before looking at her. “Did we kiss ?”

“Yes and you died.”

"It's weird. Normally you go to heaven after you die, not before. But I probably don't have enough superhero points for heaven yet, so the other option is that I became totally crazy."

“Wade…”

"I know, White and Yellow would have told me. They're already saying that all the time, but they would have insisted, especially for me to escape from the asylum. It's no fun fighting with fake people and hippos. Was I dead long ?"

“No, a little over half an hour.”

"And you stayed with me, it's so cute. Nurse Y/N. No, Doctor Y/N, and I'll be Nurse Wilson. Oh, Doctor Y/N, I made a mistake in the dosage of a patient, I'm a bad nurse, punish me."

"… Let's see Nurse Wilson, we're in the middle of an intervention, calm down."

"Uh oh ! You're playing along !" Wade exclaimed, pouting from the ground. "I didn't expect that ! Wait, I need a blonde wig, and a white dress. You'll see, I look super sexy in a dress. Wait, we do this now or it's quick and we should have a date first ?'

“I wouldn’t say no to a date.”

"I see the genre, like in novellas. Doctor Y/N takes me to the restaurant to talk about my future promotion, but in fact, you are going to admit to me that I am pregnant with you, before I even enter your bed !"

“As long as you’re in my bed before the hundredth episode.”

“UH !”

The small, high-pitched cry of pleasure preceded a second cardiac arrest, Deadpool's mind imagining Y/N and him in a bed, with a stetoscope.

When she asked him if he was going to have a heart attack every time, he told her that he would probably die for good the day he saw her naked, or that they made love for the first time.

But Wade was a gentleman, he ate lots of vegetables, exercised, and begged Daredevil to teach him meditation techniques.

So he had the courtesy of having the next heart attack only after they were finished, and in the toilet. And every time after that they were together, Wade would go out of his way to just get a nosebleed.

Especially on Weasel's counter, telling him everything they had done or almost everything, which annoyed the poor waiter a lot, even if he knew that it would happened from the start, the moment he saw Deadpool with Y/N.

[immortalityriver]

Hello ! I loved the Genya stories you created! Well, if it's not too much to ask, could you do one about Genya having a son and how he would react when he saw him for the first time and how he would act?

`` you're so real for this anon

genya/gn!reader

au: original/major timeskip

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"..he's got your eyes." You murmured, breaking the deafening albeit oddly comforting silence.

Genya failed to tear his eyes from the tiny little thing all wrapped up in his arms, a life so new yet already so precious to him.

".. Yeah.."

You sat up, looking over his shoulder and watching intently

".. Is he supposed to be red?" He questioned, his voice laced with slight concern as he tilted his head as if he were attempting to figure it out

"..be nice. That's your son."

"I know, I know. I was just asking."

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The days following the birth of the boy were undoubtedly rough for the both of you.

Genya so badly 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 to be involved though, which stemmed from the fact his own father was hardly around long enough to remember all of his children's names.

It might've even healed a little part of him, seeing how easy it was to love his son reassured him that he wasn't hard to love either.

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"What're 𝘺𝘰𝘶 starin' at?" He cooed, despite the obvious exhaustion painted all over his face this was the most content he'd been for a while.

Tiny purple bug eyes stared right back at him, a little bald and a little fugly but he'd get cuter.

It'd only been a few days after all.

"Are you really gonna hog him all morning?.."

The door creaks and you step out, feeling fresher from the 3 hour nap he'd practically forced you to take, repeating "𝘕𝘰, 𝘯𝘰 𝘸𝘦'𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘦! 𝘎𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵."

"..won't be this tiny forever, just wanna enjoy it."

His gaze shifts down to the small frame of their son, eyes heavy but the affection on his face doesn't waver even slightly.

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[babsharrison]

Safe Haven - John Wick

(Chapter Five)

Pairing | John Wick x Original Fem! Character

Summary | In search of a breath in his tumultuous life, John Wick finds himself in a charming bookstore where he meets a sweet and welcoming woman. As they grow closer, John questions whether she can love him despite the dark secrets he carries. While battling the shadows of his past, he must protect the love that is blossoming and discover if hope and redemption are truly possible.

Word Count | 2.1k

A/N | I think it turned out a bit rough, but I tried. Mia is in my heart ❤️

Previous chapter!

John left the bookstore with his senses heightened, though he was already aware of the looming threat. Winston had mentioned that Marco Vitale wanted revenge, but John hadn't paid much attention to it. Now, he was facing the result of that choice: three men stood before him, watching with a mix of mockery and caution.

The streets seemed darker, and the city lights felt more distant. The men laughed, but John could sense the fear hidden behind their forced chuckles. They were nervous, despite trying to mask it with arrogance.

“Baba Yaga...” murmured the leader, a bald man, trying to sound confident. That nickname never failed to provoke a reaction. But John didn't bother responding; he just stared at them with his cold gaze.

“Marco sends his regards,” the man continued, stepping forward, attempting to size John up with his eyes. “And he also wanted to say that we're watching you. Every step you take.”

The other two men laughed mockingly, but John could see that behind their laughter, there was a palpable tension. They knew who they were dealing with, and even though they tried to hide it, the fear was evident. They're not complete idiots, John thought.

"Watching, huh?" John spoke calmly, giving a slight smile that didn't reach his eyes. “Then make sure you do it right. And go back to Marco with a message: if he wants to settle this, he should come in person.”

The leader hesitated for a moment, and the smile on his face disappeared. The other two stopped laughing, realizing they were in dangerous territory. They didn’t want to be there. The tension was obvious as the bald man signaled the others, making it clear that it was time to leave.

“We’ll see you around, Baba Yaga,” he said, trying to maintain a confident façade, but John could tell that deep down, he was just trying to end things before they got worse.

The three of them got into the car and disappeared into the shadows of the night, the sound of the engine quickly fading. John watched as they vanished, standing still for a few moments longer, making sure they were really gone. Cowards, he thought, although he knew this wouldn’t be the last time he’d see Marco and his goons.

John turned back and walked into the bookstore, quietly closing the door behind him. He found Mia tidying up the counter, but she was eyeing him cautiously, clearly worried.

“What was that about?” Mia asked, trying to keep her voice casual, but the nervousness was evident.

John looked at her calmly and forced a small smile, soft enough to reassure her. “Nothing for you to worry about. Just... part of my job.”

Mia blinked a few times, looking confused. “Your job?” She furrowed her brow, clearly trying to make sense of how that bizarre situation fit with the idea that John was a businessman. “What exactly do you do again?”

John let out a short laugh, brushing off the subject. “International business,” he said, his voice casual but vague. “Sometimes, I have to deal with difficult people.”

Mia seemed to think about that for a moment, then shrugged, accepting the explanation. “I figured it was something like that. You have this serious vibe... must be tough dealing with certain people.” She returned to organizing the counter, still a bit suspicious, but content with his answer.

“Yeah, some people are pretty complicated,” John replied, keeping his tone light. He watched as Mia turned off the lights in the bookstore, and the tension from the night seemed to start dissipating.

“Best to close up,” he suggested, glancing one last time out the window, just to make sure the men hadn’t come back. “It’s really late.”

Mia smiled softly, relaxing a little more. “Yeah, I guess it’s about time.”

John watched silently as she finished tidying up the last few things. Even though the threat of Marco still lingered in his mind, he knew that at that moment, the most important thing was keeping Mia away from all of it. She couldn’t get involved. To her, he was just a businessman. And that’s how it had to stay.

When Mia left the bookstore, John followed her at a safe distance, always alert to his surroundings. The men who had shown up earlier were still on his mind, and although he knew he might be overreacting, the thought of leaving her alone, without being sure they were really gone, bothered him. He was, however, aware of how this could look... strange. Being seen as a stalker wasn’t a good idea.

Mia seemed lost in her own thoughts as she walked, the sound of her footsteps softly echoing on the pavement. Suddenly, her phone buzzed, interrupting the silence. She stopped to check the message, and a small smile of relief appeared on her face.

“It’s Tom,” she said, turning to John. “He works with me at the bookstore. He’s coming to pick me up.”

John felt a slight pressure in his chest when he heard that, but kept his expression neutral. There was something about her presence that made him want to stay close, perhaps out of pure vigilance, or something he couldn’t quite define yet. “That’s good,” he replied, hiding any sign of frustration. “It’s always nice to have someone nearby.”

Moments later, a car pulled up at the corner, and Tom appeared, waving cheerfully. “Mia! Ready to go?” He smiled with warm familiarity. His disheveled hair caught the streetlights as he approached.

Mia waved back, but before getting into the car, she turned to John with a look of gratitude. “Thanks for looking out for me, Mr. Wick.” There was a quiet genuineness in her words, something that disarmed him for a brief moment.

John nodded, trying to suppress the slight discomfort of being caught off guard. “Of course. I’m glad you have company. Just... take care, alright?”

Mia hesitated, her eyes scanning him as if trying to figure something out. Then, before turning fully, she spoke almost casually: “Mr. Wick... tomorrow we’re having a bookstore event at the park. It’s open to the public. If you want to drop by... you’d be welcome.”

The surprise hit John like a subtle shock. He raised his eyebrows slightly, not hiding the caution that always accompanied him. An unexpected invitation. Part of him immediately grew suspicious — after all, he didn’t believe in coincidences or unintentional gestures. But there was something in the way she said it, a genuine simplicity that disarmed him from another angle. The pull towards something different, almost normal, stirred something inside him, something he tried not to let show.

“Maybe I’ll stop by,” he said, his voice controlled, trying to sound casual, but unable to hide the slight internal conflict. His eyes showed curiosity — and, perhaps, a touch of something more that he wasn’t ready to admit.

As Mia walked away, John remained on the sidewalk, watching. He wanted to call out to her, to tell her to stay away from those streets, but he knew he couldn’t. Instead, he watched her get into the car, and Tom began to drive off.

The two of them laughed and talked, Mia’s worries seeming to fade as they drove away. John remained there, his mind filled with images of what could happen if Marco Vitale was truly watching them. And now, more than ever, the feeling that he should’ve done more gnawed at him.

With a sigh, John turned and began walking through the shadows, the streets now feeling darker than ever. He had to prepare for what was coming — not just with Marco, but also with his own complicated feelings towards Mia. This connection was deepening, and he wasn’t sure if he was ready for it.

Inside the car, Mia settled into the passenger seat as Tom turned on the radio, filling the space with soft music. He shot a curious glance at Mia, noticing her distant expression.

“So, how was your night?” Tom asked with a mischievous smile. “What’s going on with ‘the mysterious guy’? You’ve got a talent for attracting enigmatic figures.”

Mia laughed, a little nervously. “It was a... different kind of night. I didn’t expect it to end like that.”

“Different how? Did the guy give you trouble?” Tom raised an eyebrow, growing a bit more serious.

“No, nothing like that.” She shook her head. “It’s just... some men showed up. I think they’re from his job. He said it wasn’t a big deal... I don’t know, maybe it really wasn’t.”

Tom made a face and then smiled. “That explains it. The suit’s not just for style, it’s serious business. I bet the guy only has those in his wardrobe—he’s probably a secret agent.”

Mia giggled and gave Tom a light shove on the shoulder. “No way, Tom! But guess what I did?”

“What?” Tom asked, now genuinely curious.

“I invited him to tomorrow’s event.”

Tom stared at her wide-eyed for a second before bursting into laughter. “You invited ‘the mysterious guy’ to the bookstore event? Seriously? And he didn’t even know it was happening?”

Mia laughed along. “Stop it, he wasn’t in the bookstore when it was open, and since he’s been showing up for weeks, I don’t know, I thought it would be nice. Maybe it’ll even help promote the bookstore, you know?”

Tom shook his head, still laughing. “Well, that makes sense. He seems to like the place, right? He’s almost becoming part of the furniture. Maybe he’ll even show up and bring more people!”

“Tom!” Mia laughed, shaking her head. “I just want the event to help the bookstore. My grandpa wanted it to be a special place for the community... and things have been kind of slow lately.”

Tom looked at her with affection, softening the tone of his joke. “Hey, Mia. You’re doing an amazing job keeping his dream alive. And, who knows, maybe Mr. Wick will end up helping.”

Mia smiled, feeling comforted by her friend’s words. “Thanks, Tom. I hope everything goes well tomorrow.”

As the car drove through the softly lit streets, Mia couldn’t shake her thoughts about John. The mystery surrounding him was almost palpable, and even amidst the tension of that night, something about him fascinated her. How could someone who seemed like just an ordinary businessman, always impeccably dressed, stir so much curiosity? The intensity in his eyes, the way he watched her in silence, left Mia intrigued. And that combination... made her heart beat a little faster.

The car stopped in front of Mia’s building, and she stepped out, still immersed in her thoughts. “Thanks for the ride, Tom,” she said, snapping out of her reverie. Tom smiled, as friendly as ever.

“Take care, Mia. And you know where to find me if you need anything,” he replied with a wave before driving off.

Mia waved back and climbed the stairs to her apartment. Even after she got home, her thoughts about John didn’t fade. Who was he, really? He seemed like a serious man, involved in some important business, but something didn’t quite add up. Maybe it was the discreet, almost watchful way he had accompanied her that night. It felt more like he was protecting her, which made her wonder if there was more beneath that facade.

She dropped her bag on the table, sitting on the couch to try to process everything. It wasn’t common for her to feel this way about someone — and that made her a bit uncomfortable. John seemed to carry an invisible weight, something he would never reveal easily. And yet, a part of her wanted to know more, to discover what lay beneath that serious expression.

Mia looked out the window, watching the city lights twinkle in the night. She didn’t know much about John beyond his visits to the bookstore and the appearance of a businessman. But something told her he was much more than he appeared to be. However, she knew she couldn’t rush things. He was someone reserved, clearly involved in something important, but Mia wondered if he also carried a certain loneliness that made him return to the bookstore, a place so calm and peaceful.

As she thought about the invitation to the park event, a strange feeling washed over her. Would John really show up? And why did the idea of seeing him again make her feel so anxious? There was something about him, something she didn’t yet understand, but that drew her in an inexplicable way.

With a small smile, Mia decided that, for now, only time would answer her questions. Whatever the reason behind John’s enigmatic presence, she felt that, somehow, her life was changing, even if subtly. Maybe he was just an ordinary man, or maybe there was much more to discover.

Next chapter!

[ksnfangz]

EPISODE ONE — FATE | PROLOGUE

New year, Same Crush, Same friends, Same Grades, and what’s this? A new handsome face!

Y/n L/n was well known for her bright and bubbly personality, the cheerful girl always smiling and jumping around throughout the school day despite her low scores, and the mean comments made by her classmates about her loudness or existence within their school.

She is also known for her very obvious crush on the school's golden boy Yang Jungwon. The girl does little to nothing to hide the fact that she likes said boy. Even mustering up the courage to confess during their freshman year.

" Jungwonie ~ I like you." you smiled voice pitched a bit higher than usual, eyes shimmering under the bright sunlight. A simple " I am not interested." is all you received in response as the boy walked away leaving you to sweep by yourself.

However, the rejection didn't at all phase Y/n. You were a determined woman and you wouldn't let Jungwon's rejection stop you from crushing– it had become a part of your daily life at this point.

So here you are a year later and still as in love as you were a year prior. Only now you and Jungwon were part of the same friend group. Thanks to your best friend Sunghoon who had become good friends with Jungwon over the Summer. And the final cherry on top was that Jungwon sat at the desk to your right so you could stare at him freely without being called out by their teacher or straining your neck... again.

" Y/nnie~ Guess what! your best friend is going to be one of the top idols in Korea soon." Sunghoon brags sitting himself in the seat to your left. The male had been your best friend since kindergarten so now you were stuck dealing with his randomness forever.

" Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it." you reply eyes never leaving the boy sitting to your right. Smiling as you watch him write down notes from his textbook. No wonder he's at the top of the class, he never stops studying.

" Hey you may doubt me now but I know about 10 companies that would beg to have a face like mine under their label." Sunghoon is about to continue his rant when he feels a tap on his shoulder.

Kim Sunoo.

Kim Sunoo was pretty cute for a guy, very smart, sometimes mean and a bit scary but that just made Sunghoon even more interested. How could someone with the face of a baby be so tough and outspoken?

" Sunghoon hyung you're in my seat!" the boy claims foxlike eyes staring into Sunghoon's widening round ones.

" Oh yes! sorry." The park boy apologizes before moving to the desk behind Sunoo. " Thank you!" the boy said sending Sunghoon one of his usual bright smiles as he sat down in his newly acquired seat. There were no assigned seats but Sunoo knew he wanted to sit beside you this year to make sure he could help you if necessary and because you were a pleasure to be around.

" Yah Kim Sunoo your hair! it looks great, I am jealous." Y/n whines playful pout resting upon her lips as she admires the boy's dark red hair. " Wonyoung dyed hers blonde! I’ve heard that's Jungwon a type." Sunoo whispers. Y/n sighed she had been wanting to dye her hair for ages but her mother would kill her if she ever put color anywhere near her hair. People like Sunoo and Wonyoung were very lucky. Y/n watches as said girl talks to Jungwon with her doll-like smile and flowing blonde locks.

" Do you think I would look good blonde?" The girl asks looking back at Sunghoon. "Of course not!" earning an eye roll from y/n and a smack on the arm from Sunoo that leaves him softly rubbing at the area. “ow.”

" You'd look beautiful with any hair color y/n don't let this fool give you any advice. He once got bleach and dye mixed up and almost went bald!" Sunoo laughs.

" I'm starting to think all the bleach went to his brain." Sunoo adds grabbing his notebook from his book bag.

" Hey! My scores are pretty good in my opinion." Sunghoon argues. " Doing good on the exam is one thing but remembering the information is another Hoon." Sunoo replies.

“ yeah well, I don’t see you offering tutoring sunshine.”

“ as if I’d waste my time tutoring you.”

" Will you two quit flirting in front of me please it's disgusting." Y/n sighs turning her attention back to the cat-eyed boy in front of her. Completely missing the way both of her friend's cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

" Yeah well, why don't you wipe the drool off of your lip and pay attention for once?"

" Yang Jungwon is far more entertaining than whatever Mr.Lee is teaching." Y/n responds her smile growing as she rests her chin in her hands. Of course, you should be paying attention to the lesson since your English grade was a bit low for your parents liking but you’d rather spend your time studying jungwons face than studying the English language.

" Y/n L/n."

The girl snaps out of her trance eyes widening. All eyes shifted towards her. "Please come write the sentence that Wonyoung Just read!" Mr.Les says gesturing towards the freshly wiped chalkboard. Slowly standing from her seat y/n timidly makes her way to the board.

I lost everything, I became a monster that can't die, but now I know what I have to do, Follow the blood token...

The girl freezes what was the last word again she thinks to herself trying to recite the poem in her head again,

how do you even spell that word is it an F or Ph....

English is stupid.

"Fate," says an unfamiliar voice. The chalk is removed from her hands as the unfamiliar male finishes the sentence. Y/n looks up at the boy silently thanking him with her eyes. The boy smiles before turning to face the class.

" he's handsome" "Is he the new transfer from Japan?" " how's he so tall?" I heard he's good at basketball... even better than Lee Heeseung " "No one is better than Lee Heeseung"

" Everyone let's quiet down and give our new student a chance to introduce himself. Y/n you may return to your seat." Mr.Lee says. the girl quickly made her way back to her desk dusting the chalk off of her hands.

" Hello everyone my name is Nishimura Riki, you can all call me Ni-ki, I'm from Japan, and I like sports." The male— Ni-ki informs, the class once again breaking out into small conversations as the male walks to the only empty seat which happens to be right behind y/n.

The boy softly tapping the girl's shoulder to get her attention. "Fate," the boy says once again, showing the word engraved cover of his journal. " Guess I got lucky." he smiles earning a small chuckle from the girl. Completely unaware of the pair of eyes that were lingering on the two.

A/N ; short first chapter i’ll try to make the next ones longer! I just wanted to get the introduction out of the way. Please let me know if you see and spelling errors, or the name soojin anywhere this was originally an x OC! || next update may take a while i just go a surgery done and the medicine makes me very sleepy

masterlist . next

Taglist Status : open

©KSNFANGZ. please do not plagiarise, repost, copy or translate any of my works without permission!

[queer-irritator]

Drive Max Disaster | Wade Wilson x Fem!GN! Reader

Content warnings: Language, misgendering, alcohol, fluff <3 <3 Word count: 3,479

Synopsis: Reader is weighed down by the cost of living and needs to find a second job. Luckily, the Drive Max has an opening for an assistant! 

a/n: Hello lovelies! I have so many ideas for Wade/Deadpool swirling around in my head, so here is one of said ideas. Of course I did not proofread. This is also my first time writing Wade so let me know your thoughts!!

You sighed in frustration, looking helplessly at your overdue bills on your laptop. Despite working 50 hour weeks, it’s somehow not enough to satisfy the greedy hands of capitalism. You needed a second job. To spare your pride from any more damage, you close the tab where your debt stares into your soul and start looking for some easy-going jobs. 

To your disappointment, there were not very many options for part-time jobs. You applied to a few assistant and receptionist positions and decided to treat yourself to a freezer burnt fudge popsicle for all your hard work. 

The next morning you were awoken by your phone’s ringtone. You groaned, of course someone would be calling you on your one day off. Without checking the caller ID, you answered groggily. 

Your eyes shot open when you heard a man on the other line mention your application for an assistant at the local used car dealership. You sat up and put on your best professional voice and secured an interview the same day. 

It wasn’t long until you were stepping out of a taxi in front of the dealership, wearing your nicest business-casual clothes and confidently walking into the building. 

An older man who was balding, and what hair was left around his head was pure white, with a matching white mustache approached you.

“Welcome to Drive Max! My name is Cameron, can I get you some refreshments?” 

You put on your sweetest smile, “Hi, Cameron. I’m actually here for an interview for the assistant position.” 

“Oh, of course! Silly me. I’m going to fetch Peter, our manager and he’ll be conducting your interview.” The man concluded your conversation while showing you to a small office to wait in. 

You waited for about 15 minutes before a man, presumably Peter, entered the room looking slightly flustered. 

“Hi, sorry about the wait.” The man rambled on about how business was booming and some other bullshit to make his establishment seem like the perfect place to work. 

The interview was nothing different than any other than the management seeming more flustered and desperate for help than usual. You did some negotiation with Peter and came to an agreement which included a $3,000 sign-on bonus if you did your paperwork today. 

So, there you were. Sat alone in the office Peter was with you moments ago, filling out the most repetitive paperwork you’ve ever read. 

A commotion from the front room tore your concentration from the papers before you. You lifted your head and could see a few figures moving around through the blinds.There was also muffled talking, but you couldn’t make out any words. 

Suddenly the talking stopped and one of the figures was coming towards the room you were in. Quickly, you sat back down and acted as if you had been minding your own business the entire time. The door to the office swung open and a man with scarred skin and a very obvious toupee made direct eye contact with you. 

“You’re the new assistant?” He questioned you.

“... Yes.” You cautiously answered his question.

The man moaned dramatically in relief, “Thank GOD. We have to go get burritos right now.” 

You couldn’t hold back the puzzled look on your face, “Oh, uhm… I don’t think… I haven’t started working here yet.” 

The man chuckled, “For 3k you do.” 

You couldn’t help your jaw dropping slightly. How did this man know all of the details of your employment? Maybe he was the owner…

“Yes, sir.” You put your pen down and followed the man through to lobby. 

He attempted to whisper to Peter, but he didn’t lower the volume of his voice at all, “I like this one.” 

You couldn’t begin to comprehend what you had gotten yourself into. 

The man, who had finally introduced himself as Wade Wilson, led you to a car and tossed some keys at you.

“I call shotgun!” he yelled, diving into the passenger seat. 

You narrowly caught the keys and entered the car, starting it. 

“So, where are we going?” You asked as you adjusted the mirrors and the seat to be more comfortable. 

The man shrugged, “I usually just drive around until I find somewhere that sells food.”

“Okay… how about we use Google?” You proposed, taking out your phone and looking up some Mexican restaurants nearby. 

While you glanced over some reviews, Wade began messing with the car radio. Eventually he landed on “Angel of the Morning” and cranked the volume as high as it could go as he began to sing along. 

You looked to Wade, dumbfounded. This really must be some big wig’s son or ridiculously rich for this man to have a job, anywhere. You sighed and put the directions up on your phone and started the drive. 

The blaring music was beginning to give you a headache and you’d only been driving for 2 minutes. You decided rolling down the windows would, hopefully, make the rest of the drive slightly more bearable. But you were very wrong. The moment you rolled down the passenger side window, Wade began to climb out and sit in the window, still belting out to the next song that was playing. 

“Oh my fucking god.” You mumbled to yourself, flicking your eyes between the road and the man half out the window. You turned down the music and tugged on his pants, “Get back in here! You’re going to kill yourself!”

“Oh, calm down.” He said, plopping himself back in his seat, “You never heard of mutants before?” 

You glanced at him, your heart racing slightly less now that he had all limbs inside the car. 

“Of course I have. I just didn’t know that you were one. Besides, mutants can still die.” You felt a sense of ease as you spotted the restaurant down the road. 

“Not me, baby.” He put his feet up on the dash, “100% invincible.” He had a smirk on his face and you could tell he was looking at you out of the corner of his eye to see your reaction. 

“Congratulations. Unfortunately I am not immortal, and when you act like a jackass you put other people’s lives in danger.” You snapped just as you pulled into a parking spot. “Go get your fucking tacos.” “Sheesh lady… and it’s burritos, not tacos.” Wade explained as he got out of the car. 

You rolled your eyes and called out to him as he walked toward the entrance, “And I’m not a lady!” 

He stopped and turned around, “I’ll have you know I’m gender blind! I’m VERY inclusive.” He disappeared into the building before you could think of something to say back. 

You sighed loudly and ran your hands down your face. You couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped your lips as you reflected on the entire situation. This was going to be quite the part-time job. 

You tried to pass the time by scrolling on your phone, but as the minutes ticked by, you were becoming slightly impatient. And you also wanted some food for yourself. You stepped out of the car, making sure to lock it, and entered the restaurant Wade went into 20 minutes ago now. 

You were greeted by the sight of Wade hunched over at a bar stool, wrappers all over the counter, three empty beer bottles, one half full, and a half eaten burrito in his hand. 

“Wade!” You sighed and walked up to him, “I thought you were just doing a pick up order or something.” 

He looked at you as he took another swig of beer, “Pick up?? Nah, this is my lunch break.” 

“Your lunch break? It’s not for work?” You asked, confused. 

He shook his head, “Nope.”

You looked more closely examined the man before you and spotted a nametag that read: Wade, beginner salesman. 

You sighed and rubbed your forehead. It was your first day and you disappeared with a beginner salesman for an hour… How were you going to get out of this?? “Okay, we need to go back. Before we get in more trouble.” You demanded.

“I’m not done eating yet!” he whined, arguing back like a little kid. 

“Dude, I really don’t care. Either come back with me or I’m leaving you here.” You said before walking back outside and getting in the car.

Wade groaned and chugged the last of his beer and stuffed the rest of his burrito in his face and made it back to the car just as you were going to pull away. You gave him a quick glare before driving back to the dealership. 

Apparently the man had some sort of conscious and spoke up just as you put the car in park and took off your seatbelt.

“I’ll let Peter know it was all my fault. We’re best buds so he can cover for me.” Wade explained and literally skipped back into work. 

You sighed and began the walk of shame to the door. You decided you were just going to finish your paperwork and apologize profusely and hope you get a second chance. 

But, you couldn’t help overhear Wade and Peter’s conversation on your way to the office.

“C’mon man, you know I’ve been having a hard time… With Vanessa, the Avengers.” 

“I know, Wade, I know. But you can’t keep doing stuff like this. This has to be the last time, I can’t cover you if it happens again.”

“Thanks, peanut.” 

You’re also pretty sure you witnessed Wade grip Peter’s ass when he hugged him after the conversation. 

You kept your head down the rest of the day, working on getting all types of paperwork and files organized. It was now 6:30pm and you were gathering your things you left in the office.

“Knock knock.” Wade’s voice sounded off behind you. 

You turned around and met his eyes. You had felt bad for him after overhearing that he was going through a hard time, so you gave him a smile. “Heading home?” He questioned you casually, though inside his mind he was cursing himself for being such an idiot to ask if you were heading home. Of course you were going home. 

“Yup. Home sweet home.” You chuckled nervously.

“Mmh, yeah. The sweet, sweet home I share with an old blind lady.” He joked, or at least you think it was a joke.

You laughed, “At least you got someone to go home to. Some of us aren’t so lucky to have a blind lady waiting for you.” 

“Well, in that case… How about I take you out for a drink?” He was still stoic-ly leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed lazily.

A blush crept onto your cheeks as you turned your head to hide your face from him. 

“I dunno, I got another job to get to in the morning.” You rummaged around for an imaginary lost object.

“How about just to apologize? For being an asshole… if I’m not your type, I mean.” His eyes were glued to your ass as you stalled, bent over looking for something even Wade knew wasn’t there. 

You felt your face heat up even more. You weren’t sure what it was, but there was something magnetizing about Wade. He was an annoying asshole, but you could also sense there was something deeper to him. You found a random pen under a desk and picked it up to cover for your stalling. You took a breath to compose yourself before turning around to face Wade.

You noticed his gaze had to travel from your waist up to your eyes when you turned to face him, but you decided to ignore that for now, “Okay. But just for a little. I really do have work in the morning.” 

“I won’t keep you up too late.” He winked at you and then whipped out his phone to send a text. “Our ride will be here soon.” 

You nodded and followed Wade outside. It was just beginning to turn from Summer to Autumn, so the nights started to get a little chilly and the sun was setting sooner. 

Within a few minutes, a taxi pulled up. Wade opened the back door for you. His gesture surprised you, but you thanked him and sat down in the back of the car. Wade got in the front seat and quickly introduced you to Dophinder, a friend of his apparently. 

“Headed back home tonight Mr. Pool, sir?” The taxi driver questioned.

“Oh, not tonight, Dophinder. Tonight is the night I get my groove back. We’re going to Putt Putt Palace.” Wade said confidently.

“Ohh, very nice choice, Mr. Pool!” Dophinder admired Wade’s choice of establishment and started to drive. 

Once you had arrived at the mini-golf course and Dophinder had driven away after gladly taking a high-five as payment, you spoke up, “I thought this was just going to be drinks?”

“Yeah, well ‘Do you want to get drinks’ tends to go over better than ‘I’m going to dominate you at Putt Putt Palace.’”

“Ohhh, so you’re getting cocky now, huh?” You chuckled slightly.

“Oh, like you wouldn’t believe.” He smirked and led the way to pay for a full round of golf and picked out the red putter and ball. 

“Damn, red is my favorite color. I’ll do black then.” You said, grabbing the supplies in the color you chose. 

Wade gasped softly, “Red and black…” 

You looked over at him, “Red and black… it’s a good color combo.” 

“It is, indeed.” He smiled and also ordered two extra large margaritas that came on a necklace in one of those comically large, colorful souvenir cups. 

“Oh my god.” You chuckled when Wade handed you the drink, “You’re trying to get me drunk, aren’t you?” “I would never! I’m going to win this game fair and square!” He defended himself and put the cup around his neck and walked up to the first hole and lined up his shot. 

You watched Wade as he carefully calculated his swing. You gave in and also put your drink around your neck and took some sips, it was awfully convenient. 

Wade hit his ball and watched it go around the course and fall perfectly into the hole. 

“Fuck yeah!” He cheered and performed a small victory dance.

You rolled your eyes and playfully pushed him out of the way, “It was a lucky shot, Mr. Pool.” 

You glanced at him when you used the name the taxi driver addressed him as. 

Wade gave you a bit of side eye while he sipped his drink. 

You pressed him further, “Why’d he call you that, anyway?” You took your first swing, making it a good amount across the course. 

“It’s an old nickname. I don’t go by it anymore though.” he explained, taking glances at your ass and different parts of your body each time you were getting lined up to hit your ball, finally sinking the hole in 3 strokes. 

The night went on, the sky growing darker and the conversation between the two of you growing deeper. The fact that you had skipped lunch and hadn’t had dinner yet was definitely weighing on you as the alcohol in your system took effect more quickly than usual. You made it to hole 10 out of 18 before you really started struggling. 

You were swaying slightly on your feet, trying to focus and stay still long enough to make a good shot. You went to swing and missed the ball, causing you to break out into a fit of giggles. 

“Oops!” You chuckled and began to line yourself up again. 

Wade was very amused watching you struggle and become more undone at each hole. But he didn’t want you to fully make a fool of yourself, so he approached behind you and gently placed his hands on your shoulders to help steady you. 

“Ooh, thanks.” You smiled and successfully hit your ball this time. 

“Hey, how come you’re not drunk?” You looked up at him while his hands were still on your shoulder.

“‘Cause my healing factor won’t let me, beautiful. But believe me, I’ve tried.” He explained and walked over to your ball with you.

You blushed at the name he called you. He’d been doing it all night. Throwing in a “babe” or “beautiful” every so often, and it always seemed so natural, it caught you off guard every time. 

He continued to help and also tease you for the next 6 holes. As the game was coming to an end, most other people had left the area by now. As usual, Wade was in his position behind you as you took your swing. As you followed your ball with your eyes, it almost felt surreal seeing it sink a hole in one. 

“Oh my god!” You exclaimed. “I did it!! I fucking did it!” You cheered and turned around to shove it in Wade’s face. You were blind to the fact that there was no way you could even catch up to Wade, let alone win the whole game. 

Wade was rolling his eyes at your taunts, “Whatever! You’re still not gonna win!”

You chuckled and moved on to the last hole, “Show me what you got.” 

You watched Wade’s face fill with concentration as he carefully calculated his next move. Your eyes couldn’t help but wonder down his body. You hadn’t noticed how muscular he was before now. His work uniform hid most of his body, but you could see his biceps flexing as he hit his golf ball. 

He hadn’t hit the ball hard enough, because once it got to the middle of a metal loop in the center of the course, it lost momentum and fell out. 

“Fuck!” Wade cursed at himself as he stepped aside to let you take your swing. 

“It’s okay,” You moved into position at the start of the course and set your ball down, “This way I can watch you when you hit the ball again.” Your inhibited state of mind had you speaking your thoughts before you had any chance to think it through. 

Wade’s nonexistent eyebrows raised slightly. Sure, he had been flirting with you and asked you on this date, but he never thought you would actually like him or find anything about him remotely attractive. Up until that moment he had convinced himself you were just trying to be nice to the painfully obviously insane burn victim at your new job. 

You lifted your head from your ball to Wade, “You gonna help me or just stand there?” 

“Yeah, yeah. Of course.” He had been lost in his own thoughts and for once, left speechless. He moved behind you again and placed his hands on your shoulders. 

You had missed the warmth of his body heat, it was almost addicting to have him so close to you. You didn’t realize you had just been mindlessly staring down at your golf ball while relishing in Wade’s presence. 

Wade leaned down to lower his head next to your ear and whispered, “Don’t fuck it up, peanut.” 

The feeling of his breath against your skin sent a shiver down your spine, there was no way you would be able to focus on the last round of mini golf now. You dropped your club and turned around to face Wade. The most adorable look of confusion was adamant on his face, bringing a slight smile to your lips. 

Wade opened his mouth, no doubt to say something idiotic, but before he could you placed a hand on the back of his neck and helped him lean down and captured his lips in a kiss. 

You were thankful for the extra courage your drink had given you. There’s no way you would be able to make a move on someone so confident and outgoing as Wade sober. Your kiss was brief, almost innocent. Just a soft meshing of two timid people. 

Wade was the one to pull away from you, “What was that for?” 

You shrugged, “Dunno.” 

Which was true, you didn’t know why you were compelled to kiss the man who almost got you fired on your first day of work, who acted so careless and as if he only thought about himself and his own wants. 

You started to lean up to kiss him again, but he stopped you. 

“You don’t wanna get into this, peanut. I’m a fucking mess.” Wade looked down at you, a glimmer of hurt in his eyes. 

You frowned slightly, “Well, that makes two of us.”

You waited for his response. He was glancing to his left and right every so often, like he was having an internal battle. After a few moments his eyes settled back on yours. 

“Fuck it.” he mumbled just before he closed the distance between you and gave you a proper kiss. 

[kerubimcrepin]

An analysis of That One Moment from Wakfu OVA - Book 2, Ush

Technically, this post is a part 4 of my liveblog, but still...

Today we will be talking about the interaction that I am most mentally ill about in the entirety of Wakfu.

Before I go completely off the rails: I think it's cute that despite everything, Keke still cares a lot about Ecaflip and Ecaflipus, and Atcham still cares about killing people for wronging him.

Things have changed after six centuries, but they're still just themselves. Anyway.

There is so much happening here. SO much. Let me break it down point by point:

The most obvious one: by addressing them as kids, he pulls his "I am roleplaying as your father for these strangers who don't know anything about our weird familial situation, and you will obey me" card. This is important because:

Kerubim and Atcham know how much Joris cares about the Brotherhood of Tofu and their opinions of him, to the point of going a little bit crazy at the thought of offending Yugo and Adamai.

So, even if him pulling the "I'm your dad" card is a bit egocentric, they can't say anything about that openly — because Joris would be so, so sad if everyone in this room knew he lives with his dad for 600 years now. He'd be so mad too, because "papychaaa, chaaaoncle stop embarrassing me in front of my friends!"

We KNOW Kerubim cares about not embarrassing Joris — because in the Dofus MMO he won't shut the hell up about his 20-30 dead loved ones from 200 years ago, says a Singular Thing about Atcham, and absolutely nothing about his very much alive son/fake dad, at best managing a little "we all want someone small in our lives..."

In my opinion, while some families are built on mutual roasting, the Crepin-Jurgen household houses three people with very fragile senses of self-esteem, so anything resembling roasting is usually light, exclusive to when they're all alone, and never about things that they actually hate about themselves ("short, weird, ugly, hypocrite, weak, overthinker"; "ugly" (some bald jokes allowed, but it depends on the mood); and "narcissist who kept his son in a hazardous environment for the first 7 years of his life and gave him 30 mental illnesses").

Besides the fact that Keke and Atch care about Joris making friends, — for the three of them (but especially Joris and Atcham), feeling belittled is the easiest way to ruin a relationship irreparably. If you insult them, it's just over. And I don't mean it in a funny-haha cutesy way. Sometimes, people actually dislike when they are insulted repeatedly about something they legitimately hate about themselves, and, y'know, hate everyone who hurts them this way? And you will not believe it, but people who actually care about them know and respect that. Because they love them.

So yeah, the three of them are all creatures of pride, and they respect that about each other, — which is why would never put each other in a position where they might get laughed at. (like suddenly revealing the Dad Roleplay and "600 years of living with his dad" sort of interpersonal lore)

However, being creatures of pride, I don't think Kerubim and Atcham are happy about Joris doing this. Especially because of the next point: Joris uses his position as their roleplay-dad and Asocial Son/Nephew Who Needs To Impress His Friends to essentially force them to let him go into a battle alone. Essentially, this line is translated as "you have glass bones and paper skin. you can't follow me because I said so, and you can't protest without looking weird." into Normal Human Tongue.

Joris does this for a very simple reason: they are weak (though so is he), and he's scared — he loves them! It's normal that he doesn't want to see them be hurt! Even if they have multiple lives, but they're not infinite lives, and it doesn't make every time they die NOT scary and traumatizing! He wants Kerubim and Atcham to go and rest, and he's also excited that they're finally meeting his friends.

However, unlike them, he only has one life — and they hate to see him hurt just as much, if not more, considering how much more danger he's always in:

They would really rather not leave their p'tit Jojo Joris alone with things they know are dangerous, — like Ush, — while Joris is weakened. No matter how much he wants to fight Ush one-on-one.

So, they refuse and even joke about him in the most subtle and funny way: using his own little game to make fun of him, and completely refuse his offer of leaving to rest in Sadida Kingdom, — coupled with an overexaggerated little shrug, and rubbing their statuses as so-called "sons" and "father" in his face.

These three come up with very elaborate rituals to communicate things that take normal people like ten seconds.

[waywardsou2]

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ General Bad Batch Head Canons ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Hunter

He was secretly always jealous of Cut getting to settle down, have a life, a family, getting away from all the war and bloodshed. Hunter had wanted that but never thought it was possible

Hunter cried, fully cried to himself the night after Crosshair, despite everything that had just happened on Kamino, had still chosen the Empire over his brothers. Despite all he had seen on the battlefield all of the people he had failed to save, nothing hurt more than losing his brother.

When he was young, and ever since then Hunter has only ever let his brothers trim his hair. And he helps them cut theirs too. Hunter is very particular about his hair being a certain length and usually only trims his hair a few inches at best.

Hunter's face tattoo is actually to cover a birthmark. His other brothers (not the batch) used to tease him about it when they were cadets. He eventually got the tattoo to cover it up. These days he regrets it and doesn't understand why he folded to their teasing but he's still happy with it anyway. He doesn't regret the tattoo perse more the reason he felt the need to get it in the first place

Wrecker

Wrecker got Lula from a kid he helped on Ryloth when the Separatists were attempting to invade the planet, he loved it and was very attached to the toy. But he knew how important it was to the kid and he kept it with him for years until he gave it to Omega. He thought it made sense to give it to her, a young kid he had helped gave it to him and now he had passed it on to the next kid who needed it

Wrecker used to place fake bombs or stink bombs under his brother's bunks as pranks. He was always so obvious whenever he was doing this because he would be over-eager and giggle to himself, but he did manage to jump his brothers a few times with the prank

When Wrecker was caught in a bombing accident that messed up his eye and scared his face, he had a hard time adjusting to the way he looked, he didn't recognize part of himself now. And he especially hated when his hair didn't grow back the same way, and because of that he decided to shave it all off and continue to keep his head bald

In addition to that I think that when Wrecker was younger, he had hair a similar length to Hunter, and he liked it, despite the Kaminoans telling him to cut it several times. He does miss his hair at times, but he does like it better without hair hindering him.

Tech

Techs goggles function the same as prescription glasses, he's actually far sighted, this is why his helmet was built to fit around his goggles because he basically cannot see without them

(less of a head canon more of a canon fact with my personal twist) Tech is the youngest of his brothers but he was the quickest to mature and grow, which he likes reminding them about constantly.

(this one is gonna hurt, sorry in advance) When he fell off of the rail car into the ravine below, he didn't instantly but have some very fatal wounds and wasn't far off, Hemlock and his men found him and Hemlock took his goggles from off of his dying body and left. Leaving his men to dispose of him (I don't know what my mind was thinking when I wrote this, I guess I just love angst too much)

Tech had feelings for Phee but he never knew if she was being polite or flirting with him. He never said anything about it to her or his brothers because he figured that there was never going to be a time for him to ever act on those feelings so he never did anything about them.

Echo

(keep in mind I haven't seen any pre Bad Batch content of Echo so some of this stuff might conflict with his canon)

When Echo got blown up and had to have his face reconstructed he was awake for most of the procedure because if he slept or if they induced him it wasn't likely that he would wake up again, especially considering all of the damage done to his body and brain.

(Idk why but this one is super random but just feels right to me) Echo really likes butterflies, he likes the delicacy and beauty that comes from the creature's existence, the first time he saw one he was taken aback and had stopped to admire it. His Commander scolded him for getting left behind at the time

Echo used to pick at his head implants, they made him really uncomfortable and self-conscious, and his brothers used to have to stop him from damaging them and endangering himself. It was a really big issue of his for a while.

Crosshair

Crosshair's tattoo is also a cover-up for a scar, it's the right side of the crosshair that touches his nose. That line is actually a healed over scar underneath. He thought considering his nickname that the tattoo wasn't a bad idea. He was also secretly just copying his big brother Hunter, not that he would ever admit that

This guy can nap anywhere, and I mean anywhere. He doesn't sleep so he naps when he can. In trees, standing up, in the cockpit literally any where.

Adding onto the head canon from before I think Crosshair would have insomnia. But as he would do he never told the Kaminoans because he didn't want them to "fix him"

Crosshair has a nervous/general tick where he chews on his lip, he used to chew it so often that he often had cuts all over them. In place of cutting up his lips he decided to try and alternative - toothpicks. This was a good way to hide it but to still be able to tick when he needed to, plus the toothpicks were easy to access because he could collect them from the mess hall on Kamino

I realised at the end that I hadn't written any for Omega. How dare I? I promise I'll upload some soon

Hope you enjoyed these! Tell me your head canons below!

[duckapus]

Fairly Oddparents/Splatoon Crossover AU

-Dimmsdale is in the Splatlands, and is still called that because if I change it to a fish pun I have to change Doug Dimmadome's name too and I don't want to.

-Fairies are still a Thing, and the relevant fairies are still the same (admittedly vague) ages they are in canon, so Cosmo and Wanda's generation showed up just in time to witness humanity's downfall; the floods, the domes, the professor, the final desperate failure in Alterna, all of it.

-Also all the other characters are their usual ages too, so any of the kids that I turn into Inkings or Octolings are going to be blobby for a while. With one notable exception that I'll explain when it comes up.

-The Turners are Octolings, but they're not from the Domes (hence why I put Dimmsdale in the Splatlands. I wanted them near where all the action is for reasons I'll get into later and Inkadia didn't have Octolings until after the first game's story mode while the Splatlands have always had them).

-Timmy still gets Cosmo and Wanda because his parents are still Like That, and his overbite is even more potent since it's made of the point of his beak instead of a pair of front teeth.

-Cosmo and Wanda almost look like an Inkling and an Octoling, respectively. They got a few details wrong, the biggest one being that they got their hair as close to what they're used to as they could but forgot to check if they had the right number of tentacles.

-Chester's an Inkling, no real notes there

-AJ is a bald Sea Urchin

-Crocker is an Inkling and other than the obvious details looks and acts pretty much exactly like he usually does, complete with neck ears

-Francis is a bull shark, as a reference to his "Bull-E" persona in the episode where everyone's superheroes

-Doug Dimmadome is a walrus (Marina mentions that her landlord is a Narwhal in Splat 2, marine mammal people exist)

-Vicky and Tootie are Octolings, and they are from the Domes but Vicky got them out. She actually hadn't heard Calamari Inkantation at the time, but Tootie had due to a Conveniently Placed Vent, and Vicky knew that anyone who heard that song would try to get to the surface and some of them didn't make it out alive and if even Elites hand-picked by DJ Octavio himself couldn't make it there's no way her seven-year-old nearsighted inkblot of a little sister would be able to get out on her own, but if she stayed she'd be miserable and trapped forever and that would be even worse, so Vicky packed their bags and grabbed Tootie and climbed for their lives despite very much not being freed from the Octarian propaganda by a weird magic folk-turned-pop song like everybody else who made this climb. They would've made it to Inkopolis like the other refugees but they made a wrong turn somewhere and ended up in Dimmsdale instead.

-Due to this she ends up having to raise her sister, get enough money to keep them both alive via Grizzco, babysitting and other odd jobs (she can't do turf or ranked/league because there's too much chance of her training/brainwashing kicking in and making her do something stupid Because Inklings like attack her own teammates or ignore the end-of-match whistle), teach Tootie how to speak Inklish and both of them how to read it, and figure out how to get them legal identities, all while every fiber of her being screams at her that The Enemy is all around them (it takes her the better part of a year after escaping to finally find and listen to the Inkantation, since she didn't know what it was called and wasn't high enough in the ranks to know anything about the Cuttlefish family). At fourteen.

-Chloe is an Inkling, and when she's introduced she already knows how to shift and is clearly used to it despite still being a month and a half or so away from turning twelve, which is... kind of a Bad Sign. Most Cephalings only manage that by thirteen or fourteen, though getting it at twelve, while uncommon, isn't unheard of. Any earlier and there's potentially health risks, especially since it almost has to be a case of the kid forcing it to happen (usually due to pressure and unrealistic expectations, often of the parental variety). And I mean big, "how prepared are you for your child to never be able to walk again" kind of health risks, though that's the worst-case scenario. In Chloe's case there were, in fact, negative effects, but nothing that drastic.

...No, she just starts aching all over if she spends too much time in squid form. And sometimes has stiff joints when it's cold.

-Haven't figured out what the rest of the human characters get turned into for this, but the alien and magical characters are still the same species they were in canon. And yes, the events of the show more-or-less stay the same.

-For a bit of post-series stuff, Timmy, Tootie, Chester and Chloe decide to try at being a comp team, and they're actually pretty good at it (thanks in large part to Vicky teaching them everything she learned from Grizzco, her time in the Octarian military and all the weird tricks she's had to pick up during their adventures). Their team's called the Twerpz and they've got a bit of an unusual lineup of preferred weapons.

Timmy (Splat Handle "No Ruelz" because of course it is) is the team captain and uses a Snipewriter 5H

Tootie (just uses her name) uses a Sloshing Machine Neo

Chester (uses his last name because of the whole infamous family legacy thing) uses the vanilla Splatana Stamper, and has discovered that he can use it like a baseball bat to knock away incoming bombs... aside from burst bombs since they explode on impact. Learned that one the hard way.

Chloe (goes by "3LeafClovr" because everyone thinks she's lucky when she's really not) uses a Luna Blaster Neo. She gets around the issue with her squid form by only shifting when absolutely necessary and compensating with Ink Saver (both kinds), Ink Recovery Up, a little Run Speed Up, and Parkour

So they've got a blaster that can't swim, a splatana that thinks he's in a completely different sport, their only backliner is a pencil, and not a single one of them has Ink Armor despite having two short-range weapons. It probably shouldn't work, but it does, because all four of them are completely nuts and using strategies concocted by a former Octarian soldier and Timmy coddamn Turner of all people

-Tootie ends up as Neo Agent 3. Thanks to being friends with Timmy Return of the Mammalians isn't even close to the weirdest thing that's ever happened to her. And yes this means that by that point she and Vicky have a Smallfry roommate. Tootie found him alone in the desert. Everybody calls him Shwaffle and there are absolutely zero thoughts between those big ol' eyes.

-The rest of the Squidbeak Splatoon is very confused and concerned by the things they hear about their new agent's friends and hometown

-When Timmy was twelve he and Vicky did something and now every gang in the Splatlands is scared shitless of them, including Deep Cut. They've never managed to tell anyone the full story of what exactly happened, though they will occasionally reference bits and pieces of it that sound absolutely batshit insane out of context

[lucy90712]

Could you write something with Pedri? 🥺 Pedri and the reader had a relationship in the past, but counts on Pedri's mistakes they ended up separating. One night they meet in a nightclub and Pedri is jealous of her with another. So he tries reconcillation

WC: 2.0k

Pedri's POV

Breakups are never fun and most of the time they hurt but usually after a while you move on and find someone new or at least normal people do. However nearly two years on and I still haven't got over y/n. The worst part about it all is that I broke up with her so my pain is all my own fault. The two of us began dating not long after I moved to Barcelona and for a few months things were great we did everything together and I was truly falling for her. At some point things changed and we started fighting a lot about stupid things really but the fights were so constant that after a while it was clear neither of us were happy so I ended things. We were both so young that staying in an unhappy relationship didn't seem worth it but now I wish we just worked through things and grew together. 

Right after the break up I missed her a lot as she was always by my side supporting me and although over the last two years this has faded sometimes I still wish she was by my side during the big moments. Going to the World Cup all I could think about was how I wished she was there to experience it all with me as we had talked about me one day hopefully making it to a World Cup while we were together. So many little things still hurt me more than I ever thought they would even all this time later. My biggest regret up to this point is definitely letting her go as she was my world and now without her I don't feel whole. 

Occasionally I still look at her Instagram as we still follow each other but with the amount of people I follow it's hard to see her pictures on my feed. Over the years she has had a few different boyfriends while I haven't been with anyone else since as no one could ever compare to her. Seeing her with other guys isn't what hurts the most though it's seeing her so happy without me that kills me every time I look at her Instagram. She always seems to be having fun with her friends and smiling, genuinely smiling too which is something I took for granted during our time together. It's torture watching her enjoy her life without me but I can't stop myself as I have to know how she is and what's she's doing even though she isn't mine anymore. 

My friends are always trying to set me up with other girls which has never worked out but they keep pushing and I already know that tonight will end up the same. Like always we will go out and they will find a girl who they think would be good for me and inevitably I won’t like her and we will go round in circles. Despite that I'm still going to go with them as we are supposed to be celebrating the end of the season and I don't want to miss out on that.

On the way to the club I picked up Gavi and as we arrived a few of the other guys arrived at the same time so we all walked in together and met with everyone else who was going. We all sat down and tried to talk for a while and I actually started to enjoy myself as I was just left alone and not forced to talk to anyone even though there was a lot of pretty girls in the club. At some point a few of the guys disappeared to go get drinks or go and talk with a group of girls but I stayed put and enjoyed my own evening celebrating with the guys that already have girlfriends. For once I was actually enjoying a night out as my mind wasn't always thinking about y/n and the stupid mistakes I made which led to me losing the girl of my dreams forever. 

My nice enjoyable night out didn't last much longer as it was ruined by Gavi coming back over laughing and getting me to look at some of the guys who were attempting to flirt with a group of girls. He clearly wasn't interested in any of them but Ansu, Balde, Ferran and Eric clearly were as even from a distance it was obvious they were trying to get these girls attention. I must admit it was funny to see them so desperate for these girl's attention even though on a normal day a few girls will willingly give them their numbers. It quickly turned to not being so funny anymore when I caught a glimpse of the girl Alejandro was flirting with. Straight away she looked familiar and then I saw that smile, a smile I could identify from a mile away. He was flirting with y/n and of course he didn't know that as I try not to bring her up too much as it hurts to talk about my mistakes but it hurts even more seeing someone else flirt with her right in front of my eyes especially one of my teammates. 

"Are you ok man?" Gavi asked 

"Umm yeah I'm good" I lied 

"Ok I know that's not true somethings bothering you just tell me what's up" he said 

"Ale's flirting with y/n" I stated simply 

"Who's that?" He asked 

"She's the girl I've mentioned that I dated when I was younger we broke up but I've regretted it ever since, she's the reason you guys can never get me to go on a date with another girl" I explained 

"Oh if I'd have known I would've stopped him flirting with her" he said 

"It's ok it was a few years ago I should really move on" I said 

"No if you still love her you should try and talk to her you never know she could still have feelings for you come on you are getting your girl back" he demanded 

Your POV

Usually on girls nights I will let loose a bit more and forget about everything going in in my life but tonight that's been harder than it usually is. For the last few days all I've seen is my ex boyfriends face plastered everywhere because his team just won la liga. For some this might be a bit annoying but they would get over it for me it's just painful. We didn't have the best end to our relationship as we just kind of gave up on each other after we went through a rough patch with fighting all the time and that's when Pedri ended things. To this day I still wish we had just been less stubborn and actually talked to each other so we could work through our issues but it's too late now. Seeing Pedri's face everywhere living his best life is what's been difficult this last week as my life has been tough. I just started a new and very stressful job and recently lost a family member and all I want to do is share my worries with Pedri like I always did when we were together. 

In an attempt to cheer myself up I've found myself letting this guy flirt with me and maybe flirting back a little. I mean I've had a few boyfriends since Pedri and I broke up but none of those relationships lasted very long as the guys either cheated on me or I got over them pretty quickly. This guy however seemed pretty nice he looked a little familiar but with the lighting in the club coupled with having drunk a bit I couldn't work out where I knew him from. As he was nice enough I didn't worry about where I knew him from as let's be honest after tonight I'm not going to see him again so why not have a bit of fun. The guy quickly told me his name was Alejandro and asked if he could buy me a drink which I couldn't say no to so we went to the bar together to get some drinks and kept chatting. I must say Alejandro was very charming but I'm not stupid I know what he really wants but for tonight I'm willing to play along as it's a bit of fun and I need more of that in my life. 

I was enjoying myself as Alejandro put a hand on my waist and pulled me a bit closer until it gave me a view over his shoulder. Straight away I locked eyes with Pedri who was coming towards me from across the room and I just panicked. I pulled away from Alejandro instantly and tried to get away not wanting to face reality but a hand grabbed mine to stop me getting too far. I didn't even need to look to know that it was Pedri's hand in mine as our hands fit together so perfectly just like they used to when we were together. As he pulled me back towards him I could smell his cologne which brought me right back to the date nights we used to have together when we would get dressed up even if it was just to go to McDonald's as we didn't have a care in the world. He continued to pull me away from the crowd as we headed towards the door and out the back of the club where there was no one else was around. 

"As much as it's nice to see you again I have to know why do we have to talk out here?" I questioned lightheartedly 

"Because I want to have a proper conversation" he said 

"So um how have you been?" He asked 

"I won't lie I could be better life's tough at the moment but I'm getting through it what about you you must be thrilled to have won the league" I said 

"Yeah it was cool but I'm going to be completely honest I kind of wish you were there to celebrate it with me" he admitted 

For a few seconds I couldn't believe what he just said. He missed me too. This whole time if we'd have just talked to each other the endless pain could've been prevented. My head was spinning with so many thoughts but I knew I needed to say something before Pedri got worried. 

"Do you miss me" was all I managed to say 

"Yeah I do I miss you constantly I always wish that we never broke up you were the one for me and I ruined it" he said 

"I miss you too nothing has been the same without you" I admitted 

"I don't want to take things too quickly and ruin them again but would you like to give things another go this time we will communicate better and work through any problems I just can't go on in life without you" Pedri said 

"I'd love to try this again with a clean slate" I said 

Both of us were beaming as we walked back into the club hand in hand. We both said goodbye to our friends before heading out of the club so that Pedri could drive me home. Neither of us needed to be out any more as we already got more than we could have ever wished for when leaving the house this evening. When we arrived back at my place together instinctively our lips found each other and we shared our first kiss in nearly two years but it was just as magical as our first if not even better as we are no longer awkward teenagers. As we want to take things slowly and do them right this time we didn't go any further but as he left Pedri promised me a second first date which only made me more excited for what's to come from our reunion. 

[phoebepheebsphibs]

CROSSOVER NEXT PART WHEN please

So this next update is the BIG FINALE and as such it is... uh... really long. There's a lot of extra characters in the story (because I am DEAD SET on having an Avengers Endgame moment lol) so that means extra introductions and explanations for a few and etc. etc. etc.

Remember the last really long update I gave? The one that was over 7000 words? I crossed over that mark a while ago, and I'm only ONE THIRD OF THE WAY THROUGH.

yeh,,,

It's a big update, so it's taking a while.

Snek pek! ↓↓↓

"...Very well, then," rhg!Donnie exhaled, finally admitting defeat. "In that case, I'm not sure I know how to tend to 'mystic' injuries."

"I got it," Ghost volunteered, searching in the first aid for anything especially sparkly or glowing. That would be a good sign. After some rummaging, he managed to procure some mystic cream and began to salve the cuts and sores.

rhg!Donnie watched with interest and concern. He studied the label for future reference. He memorized the patterns in which Ghost anointed the child. He took internal photographs of the angles and shapes of Mikey's scars... and prayed that he would never have to see them on his baby brother back home. He had been concerned that this was the same Mikey he'd met earlier... they looked very much alike upon first glance. But after closer inspection, he saw that they had some differences. The scars were obvious. But this one was younger, and much smaller. Not just shorter, but skinnier too. He looked a lot like his brother in that sense. As for the Leon beside him -- the one that kept giving rhg!Donnie dirty side glances -- he looked like his twin brother. Except bald. No sign of the beautiful and soft hair that rhg!Dee used to braid and style for him before he'd left. He was frightfully thin, too. A thick scarf surrounded his neck to help insulate the miniscule amount of warmth his body could provide. rhg!Donnie happened to glance over at him when he didn't expect it, and saw him pocket a few extra medical supplies, subconsciously stuffing them into his pants. There were quite a few things already in his pockets, rhg!Dee realized. This kid was a thief. Not that it bothered him, he and his Leo had been sneaky like that on more than one occasion. District 12 wasn't a very generous place to live.

rhg!Donnie found himself reaching for his hand the next time he went to snatch something. Not so much to stop him as to simply just... hold something that was so similar to his brother. He knew he wouldn't get a chance like this again for a long time. If ever. It might be stupid, but for a moment he wanted to pretend that this was his Leo. It worked for half a moment, he could almost see his brother here in the room with him.

Leon turned to him as he grabbed his hand, wide-eyed in surprise before realizing that he'd been caught.

"Oh... Old habits die hard, I guess," he explained, sheepishly dropping the tube of ointment he'd taken.

"Next time, try it like this," rhg!Donnie whispered, showing him how to take the tube with better efficiency, while simultaneously distracting the victim while you repurposed their possessions. But he got the feeling this teen already knew all the tricks of the trade.

Leon smiled weakly at him.

"Thanks, but... well, there's not really supposed to be a 'next time'," he explained, while looking back at DvD and 'Phael. "I kinda have a family now... and a home."

"Congratulations," rhg!Donnie said, hoping the genuine delight that this Leon had his family all around him came through, despite the monotonous tone in his voice.

"The kleptomania just sorta... flares up when I'm stressed," he mumbled. "When I feel like I'm not safe. I take stuff so I can pretend that I have everything I might need in an emergency." He laughed as he pulled out all the band-aids and alcohol wipes and gauze from his pockets. "I don't even know what I'd do with half of this stuff!"

"It's better to have most of this than not," rhg!Donnie mentioned, taking half of the pile and stuffing them into his own pockets, despite knowing that if he were to be portalled home again the items wouldn't be going with him. "Just in case..."

@daboyau @boots-with-the-fur-club @amevello-blue

[magpie-writes]

Venus in Furs

Pairing: Helaena Targaryen x Fem!Reader x Aemond Targaryen

Rating: E

Words: 4.6k

Warnings: Targcest, semi-public sex, bondage, pain kink, explicit smut

A/N: Venus in Furs is a poly Helaemond au. We have no idea how many chapters it'll end up being, but the story will progress as the relationship does. Sometimes a chapter might be a little kinky drabble, other times it might be an epic 10k beast. This story has just become such a vulnerable little happy place for @acrossthesestars​ and myself and we hope you enjoy it! Tags will be updated as the chapters go on.

alex masterlist | emma masterlist | ao3

Part One - Seven Hells P.1 | Part Two - Seven Hells P.2 | Part Three

The sky above was clear, stars managing to peek out even from the thick veil of the city lights. It was loud, music blaring from cars and drunk revelers pouring out from the mouths of the surrounding bars and clubs. My heels clicked on the sidewalk, the noise echoing loud over all the others and my hands curled into fists within my coat pockets.

'Don't lose your nerve,' I thought. 'You aren't allowed to chicken out.'

A sharp gust of near freezing wind ruffled my coat, blowing up beneath the short skirt of the black dress I wore under it, and I bit down on my cheek to keep from yelping nervously at the shock as I neared the building I had been looking for.

Seven Hells was a privately owned club, the red brick facade blending into all the others on the block. The only clue that I had arrived at the right place was the small gilded placard by the door that simply read "7" in an ornate script. My chilled fingers wrapped around a thick brass knocker in the shape of a dragon's head, rapping it gently against the wood. The door swung open and a handsome bouncer stared me down, the moment stretching on forever. He was older, with a close cropped silver beard, a bald head, and a thousand yard stare.

"Password," he asked, his voice rich and deep. 

"Oh don't bother with all that, Harrold," a soft voice chirped from behind him. "She's with me. Isn't that right, Lady Grey?"

The door opened a crack wider, revealing a cloud of moon pale hair and the Cheshire Cat grin beneath it. 

“Honestly, you express a tea preference one time.” Rolling my eyes despite the amused smile tugging at my lips, I stepped up onto the landing, close enough for the club’s warm air to twine invitingly around my bare legs, beckoning me inside. With an apologetic shrug to the stoic giant before me, I gave the password Helaena Targaryen texted me earlier that evening. 

“Dreamfyre.” 

He granted me a nod, as if in appreciation of a fellow rule-follower, and threw the door wide. 

“Welcome to Seven Hells.” 

If I'd thought the grandeur of our Neo-Gothic university campus was extravagant, with its ivy-clad walls, peaked windows, and rolling quads beneath venerable oak trees, the sumptuousness of this club delighted in proving me wrong. Stepping down into its shadowy interior, I couldn’t help gaping at the luxury surrounding me. Sleek, black leather couches sprawled along the edges of the cavernous room, all subtly tilted towards a low stage, the obvious focal point of the room. No one graced it, not this early in the evening, but a St. Andrew’s cross stood waiting in the wings, eager for its first victim. It was the most obvious nod towards the club’s hedonistic character but the more I looked, the more secrets I uncovered. 

Steel hardpoints graced walls and furniture, looking like so much industrial hardware until I realized their presence went beyond simple aesthetics. Mirrors littered the walls, affording endless views for performers and pleasure seekers alike. Stacks of silken cord lined low-running shelves, all in easy reach. It was an opulent, unguarded promise of sensuality. 

A dare. 

A shiver of anticipation licked up my spine, despite the warmth winding sinuously around my legs, caressing my chilled skin and urging me eagerly to shed my heavy wool coat.

“Come on. I can’t wait to show you everything.” Helaena seized my hand excitedly while I was still unwinding the glittering gray scarf from around my neck. I shoved it into the pocket of my coat as Harrold quietly lifted the garment from my arms before withdrawing to his post by the door. 

My eyes weren't sure where to land. A pretty brunette winked at me from behind the bar and heat crawled up my throat at the gesture. My gaze darted from the couches to the stage to the people who had just started to trickle into the space before landing on the pale hand that grasped my own. 

Helaena was divine, a gods damned painting, a water nymph come to life. Her white-blonde hair hung in soft waves around her shoulders, her plump body sheathed in a tight powder blue dress, the hem hitting her mid thigh. When she turned back to wink at me, the light caught in the glitter she had painted over her eyelids, her pink mouth curling up at the edges. 

"I love first timers." Her voice was soft, but I still heard every word.

I raised a brow. "Do you bring people here often?"

She squeezed my hand. "No," was all she said as she dragged me to the bar. 

The energy of the club settled around us as I followed my new friend, all simmering possibility and the driving beat of music emanating from hidden speakers. When I slid onto one of the plush velvet barstools, Helaena perched alongside me, never letting go of my hand even as she raised her other to catch the bartender’s gaze. 

“Two of the Wild Gin Brambles please, Talya”

My eyes widened in surprise as she named the exact cocktail I would have ordered from the specials menu. Despite the crowd of people surrounding the bar, jockeying to place their orders, no one looked surprised when, in mere moments, the bartender slid two glasses towards the pair of us.

“How did you guess?”

Helaena only smiled her enigmatic smile and raised her own drink to clink against mine. 

Her violet eyes tracked every movement as I raised the sweating glass to my lips and took my first sip. Flavor bloomed on my tongue, tart and sweet, strong but clear, the blackberry syrup coating my mouth even as the gin traced a cool burn down my throat. 

“That is delicious,” I said, having to raise my voice slightly to be heard over the sound of the other revelers.

“Let me try.”

Rather than lifting her own glass, Helaena leaned in and kissed me. 

Startled, my lips parted on a gasp, but when I moved to cup the other woman’s cheek, she deepened the kiss. Her tongue slid against mine, a swift, gentle taste, and then she pulled back, her gaze searching. 

“What did you think?” My voice was deeper, roughened with the desire already surging in my blood. 

“Delicious,” she confirmed. Her starry eyes roved over my curves and I could swear they came to rest on the hollow of my throat. I wondered if she could see the eager jump of my pulse.

Helaena grinned when she recognized her stare was bordering on overwhelming, glancing down into the depths of her drink and taking a sip. I looked up, willing away the heat that had settled almost uncomfortably in my cheeks. My gaze settled on the mirror, a flash of silver catching my attention. From across the room, mismatched eyes pinned me like a butterfly to glass. The set of his full mouth was almost stern, his tongue darting out to wet his bottom lip. My heart hammered against my ribs but when I blinked, he was gone. 

A wide smile broke over Helaena's face. Whatever had grabbed her attention lit her up from the inside out, a soft warm glow settling beneath her skin like a beacon. I turned and couldn't stop the soft "oh" that fell from my lips.

If Helaena was divine, then Aemond Targaryen was damned. He was her soul's twin and yet her opposite, hard and lean where she was soft and curved. He prowled toward the pair of us with all the violent grace of a predator stalking prey, the top half of his long white hair pulled away from his face, the rest hanging down his back like a curtain. He wore all black, a button down shirt tucked into fitted slacks. His face was hard, unreadable except for the flame in his left eye, the same shade of violet as his sister's. In place of his right eye, lost in some accident at the hand of his nephew, if rumor was to be believed, sat a sapphire, the facets swallowing up the low red lights of the club's interior. Helaena squealed and clapped her hands at his arrival, reaching for him. Aemond took her hand, pulling her close and bringing it to his mouth, his lips soft against her skin as he hummed in greeting. 

"I'm surprised she came," he said by way of acknowledgement, his gaze falling finally on me.

Heat bristled up my spine, righteous indignation at being referred to as if I was of no importance.

"Play nice or Lady Grey won't come at all and where's the fun in that?" Helaena replied, poking at Aemond's middle.

Something tensed in my gut at that easy, playful gesture. A reminder of how these two belonged to each other, pale and strange as binary stars and just as entangled. How could I ever hope to join their orbit? 

As if sensing that momentary flicker of doubt, Aemond raised one perfectly sculpted brow with all the cool poise of a marble god as if to ask “How indeed?” I bristled, drawing myself up to my full height, my spine set like steel. Damn him and his smug self-assurance. Helaena had approached me after all, invited me to join them in their pleasure den I’d only heard whispered about on campus, with all the dark, half-veiled insinuations that accompanied such an invitation. 

“You tell him, Hel.” I slid my arms around her waist, glaring a challenge of my own at Aemond over her shoulder. “She was just wondering if there might be any dancing on tap for the evening, or is that too frivolous for the Eyes Wide Shut crowd?”

Aemond’s mouth twitched. 

“Oh, I’m sure we could manage something.” 

In the end, all it took was an imperious nod and his sharp gaze to some nearby staff member, and then the music shifted, turning to a low, throbbing beat that pulsed through the crowd. People moved as if summoned to the dance floor, a tangled knot of writhing bodies and reaching limbs. Aemond sketched a half-mocking, half charmingly outdated bow and extended a hand to me. 

“Would she like to dance?” This time, the slyly intentional word choice felt less like a slight and more like an almost-apology, an unspoken admission of having chosen his words poorly. For the first time, I noticed how stiff his posture was. Maybe I wasn’t the only one unsure of how to navigate this evening.

I inclined my own head, amused despite myself, and said “She would.” 

It was easy enough to follow him to the dance floor, Helaena close at his heels. Aemond spun me once before drawing me close, his hand finding the small of my back. "Dance, then," he said in an amused tone, his gaze raking over my body. I narrowed my eyes as he just stood there, trying to get a feel for whatever game he was playing. It was Helaena who rescued me, her hands finding mine and pulling me further from the edge of the dance floor. 

She moved with a liquid sort of grace, the sort that left one utterly entranced. It was impossible not to move toward her, caught in her orbit as if she were the brightest star in the dark sky. Her lavender eyes were bright enough to light up the dance floor as her hands settled on my hips, turning my back to her front before pulling me flush against her. She smelled like violets and lilies and something earthier, something you would find in the forest after it rained. I wondered if later I would be covered in the body glitter she'd dusted all over herself, her skin shimmering in the glow.

"Can I touch you?" She asked, her voice low against my ear. 

There was literally nothing I wanted more in that moment.

I nodded and she ran a hand up my throat to grasp at my jaw, tilting my head back until she could catch my mouth with her own. She tasted like gin and sweet lip gloss, strawberry maybe. My hips followed whatever sinuous rhythm she set as she curled her tongue around mine. I felt her smile against my lips and couldn't stop myself from mirroring the gesture. With one hand I reached back, carding my fingers through the moonlight strands at the nape of her neck. 

One song melted into two and then three and I learned for a fact what I had already had an idea of: Helaena Targaryen was entirely captivating. She radiated a dreaminess, a sort of unexplainable out there feeling that I couldn't put my finger on but I knew I wanted to sink into. There was also an edge. She had teeth and claws and made a conscious choice to keep them sheathed. At some point I had turned back to face her and she smiled wide again, as if she had never considered not being so open, so real. Then her eyes drifted away, lighting up again when they landed on her brother. I looked too, because I couldn't help it. Aemond had taken up a perch on one of the large leather chairs, more of a loveseat, really. When our eyes met he raised his left hand and beckoned us forward with a crooked finger. Helaena drifted toward him as if pulled by gravity, her hand reaching back for mine and pulling me along after her. 

I mirrored her movements, lowering myself onto Aemond’s outstretched right thigh while she claimed his left. When I did, his gaze snapped to mine, startled. The intensity there, the banked violet fire, ripped through me like a summer storm, leaving heat and electricity crackling in its wake. Before I could shift my weight or draw back, before I could even form an apology for overreaching, he caught me around the waist to keep me still. Slowly, deliberately, curiously, he flexed his muscled thigh beneath my legs, shifting it just enough to drag against me and make me gasp. Pleasure kindled in his hawklike stare and I smiled, heat rising in my cheeks. 

We’d surprised each other. 

Helaena tipped her head back and laughed, her carefree delight so infectious even her brother’s lips quirked into something like a smile. Pure, wild joy beat like wings within my chest when her lavender gaze met mine at the same time that Aemond rested a hand on my thigh. As if some hidden key had turned, the tumblers falling into place, everything slid open, the night suddenly wide open and brimming with potential. Something was happening and we were part of it. We were all of it. 

The music fell away. All I could hear was the breath catching in Helaena’s throat when I leaned in and kissed her. The hiss Aemond sucked between his teeth when his sister’s hand slid up to cup my breast. I looked around, expecting shock or censure, but while the warmth of her palm moving over my dress made my heart race as if the world was ending, no one else seemed to even notice. Even so, I pulled back, heat flashing up my throat to settle in my cheeks. Aemond's hand tightened where it rested against my thigh and I turned to face him, my eyes downcast. He raised a hand, his forefinger catching me under the chin until I met his eye. 

"There's no need to be shy, Grey." The nickname sounded different in his mouth, sharper somehow, then when Helaena said it. "You're free to take what you want here, without judgment." 

My gaze darted between his mismatched eyes and his lips. "What do you want?" My voice was small. 

He hummed, a low noise in the back of his throat, before using his hand to tug me farther up his thigh, my hands flattening against his chest as I fell forward. His shirt was warm beneath my palms, soft and obviously expensive. And then he kissed me. It wasn't tentative or gentle. It felt as if he would devour me. Where Helaena took her time, sensuous and explorative, Aemond went straight for the kill, licking into my mouth when it opened on a whine, pulling my bottom lips between his teeth. He broke the kiss and looked up at me, his high cheekbones dusted with pink, and pursed his lips, as if he was hiding a grin. I couldn't help it and smiled back.

Helaena ran a hand up my thigh, squeezing just enough to get my attention and jerking her chin toward the stage in front of us. "The show is starting," she whispered. There was a peculiar happiness in her eyes, a sort of feeling I wasn't sure I'd ever experienced. She leaned back into Aemond's chest, his hand circling her waist to rest over her belly. The way they fell into each other was mesmerizing and I wondered if I'd ever felt that sort of easy acceptance before, the sort of muscle memory that had me sinking into someone else's softest parts. 

I turned away, suddenly feeling much too raw, and looked toward the stage as the lights lowered, a single spotlight shining bright in the middle. Lying prone on the ground was a slight brunette, her hair tied up in a bun. She wore a rose pink dress, the fabric sheer enough to see the dusky outline of her nipples, her arms laying relaxed over her head. As she slowly woke, blinking away the sleep, the light softened, mimicking the dawn, and soft music played through the hidden speakers. Fingertips drew mindless designs over the bare skin of my thigh and the feeling left me burning as they drew over my hip and up, up, up my back to massage the nape of my neck. The feeling was near sinful, my eyes closing as Aemond worked out the tension. When I risked a downward glance, I found his eyes on the stage, his face infuriatingly neutral. I raised my hand, placing it back against his chest, playing at the top button of his shirt as I glanced back toward the stage.

From the shadows of the audience on the far side, a hulking shape melted through the crowd, lumbering up the two wide steps before crouching behind a makeshift barrier, watching the young woman on stage sit up and stretch. Helaena reached forward from her perch and placed her hand on my knee, her skin warm against mine, grounding me in the moment as the man in the mask began creeping closer toward the girl on stage. A Beast on the way to claim his Beauty, I realized with a thrill.

“Is it always fairytale-based?” I whispered the question into Helaena’s ear, so close my lips brushed against her delicate skin. 

“No,” she shook her head, answering in the same respectful hush. “They do all sorts of things - exhibitions, demonstrations. But this seemed more… you.” 

Before I could ask what she meant, Aemond’s broad hand tightened around my neck.

“Pay attention,” he commanded in a low, firm voice behind my ear, turning my head back to face the stage. From Helaena’s guilty start and the way she also turned her attention back to the scene unfolding before us, I guessed he’d given her a similar reminder. Normally I would have bristled against his domineering tone, but it sent a shiver down my spine instead, making me feel as deliciously helpless as the beauty the beast prowled towards. As if he knew, Aemond trailed the tips of his fingers down my neck and between my shoulder blades. 

The task of watching the stage while he teased me like this felt Herculean, but I managed to keep my eyes on the performers, watching as the girl on stage finally registered the presence of the beast. Her brown eyes blew wide as he loomed over her and the two engaged in what could only be considered a dance. Their chemistry was a wild thing, crackling between them as they pushed and pulled, as she ran and he gave chase. The Beast reached for her, catching the pale pink ribbon that held her hair tied up, and it cascaded down her back just as he caught her, pulling her against his chest.

As his lips found her neck and his hands drew her skirt farther up her thighs, Aemond's fingers dipped below the hem of my dress. The touch itself wasn't indecent, was hardly anything more than innocent, but every nerve ending in my body lit up. He shifted his thigh beneath me, riding my dress higher, just as the beast shed the girl of her dress, her body now bare beneath the spotlight, and I fought the urge to reach back and pinch him for teasing me. But I was riveted by the performance as the actress finally gave in to the beast, succumbing to him and letting him lay her out over the stage, her back arched as he wedged himself between her thighs and devoured her.

Aemond's hand slid further beneath my dress and I couldn't stop the hitch of my breath. I knew, logically, that no one was watching us, too engaged by what was happening on stage, or what they were up to in their own seats, but my cheeks still heated at the idea, at the clandestine nature of letting this practical stranger slide his skilled fingers beneath the damp fabric of my underwear. I bit back a moan as he did just that, parting my folds, teasing at the wetness he found there. I wanted to roll my hips, to chase the pleasure his touch promised. But I stayed still, afraid to call any attention to us. 

In front of me, the Beast lay on his back, the girl, his Beauty, now straddling his hips, her face flushed from her earlier release on his tongue. She rode him, claimed him just as earnestly as he had claimed her, taking her agency and making him hers. They moaned in tandem, not the sort of practiced sounds I had heard in porn or made with partners I was more than eager to get out from under, but something more feral, more honest. As the Beast reached forward to clutch at her breasts, Aemond pinched lightly at my thigh, a hint to open my legs wider. I gave in, just an inch, and was rewarded with a lazy circle against my clit. All I wanted was to drop my weight back against him, to spread my thighs farther and see what his wicked touch could wring from me. But even as I saw other patrons doing exactly that, I knew I couldn't, knew I wouldn't.

This entire night had been totally unlike me. Taking Helaena up on the invitation had left me filled with nerves. We'd spoken often enough at school and I desperately wanted to call her my friend. She was impossible not to adore, and denying her anything felt wrong. We'd flirted and when I finally gathered the courage to ask her for her number, she'd slapped me right in the face with an invite to the most exclusive club in town. How could I say no? Especially when she mentioned the more mysterious of her brothers would be there too. 

The Beast had planted his feet on the stage, his hands gripping bruises against his Beauty, driving himself up into her. Her face bunched with pleasure as she fell forward, her hands landing on his chest to brace herself as he fucked her roughly. I felt my pulse quicken, my lungs constricting as Aemond slid a finger inside me, and then another. I couldn't stop myself, arching my back slightly to grind down against his hand. His fingers were long, slender and graceful. They felt divine inside of me and I knew it wouldn't be long until he worked me up and over that peak, the muscles of my thighs already twitching with it. 

Suddenly Beauty came with a low groan, the blood rushing up her neck to settle in her cheeks as the Beast beneath her roared his own end, their bodies going rigid. She had thrown her hands above her head in a jubilant gesture as the Beast spilled inside her, as if unafraid for anyone, everyone, to see her pleasure. Then the music died and for a moment the room was silent except for the sound of ragged breathing. I couldn't figure out where one breath started and the next began, which was mine or Helaena's or even Aemond's. The spotlight went dark and the melancholy instrumental music that had accompanied the performance melted back into the low, heavy bass from earlier. 

Aemond's hand was out from under my dress before the lights returned to normal. I hissed at the loss of him, canting forward as if seeking him out. The neediness of the gesture left me feeling more than a little pathetic, especially as he growled, "on your feet." But his voice was strained, rough even, and that gave me more than enough satisfaction. I blinked up at him, my mind hazy and buzzing after being yanked so abruptly from what had promised to be a wild sort of release. Helaena stood first and offered me a hand, pulling me up on shaking baby deer legs. She just smiled like she knew and reached up to tug at the ends of my hair. 

The crowd blurred around us as we moved past the stage, past the bar, and deeper into the club. I looked down, startled, when the click of my heels against the polished wood floors turned muffled, my footsteps suddenly cushioned by plush carpeting. We were in a hallway, the walls paneled in rich, dark wood, an expanse of wealth relieved only by a series of doors, each one different from the last. One a rich, blood red with golden accents, another gunmetal stark but littered with peepholes, the third a shockingly clear plate glass. I caught a glimpse of twining limbs and chains within and finally realized where we were headed. 

“Why a private room? I thought the whole point of this place was taking what we wanted and no one caring?” 

“I don’t like anyone seeing what’s mine.” Aemond turned to me, one arm around his sister’s waist. My heart thundered as his gaze pinned me to the emerald green door we’d stopped in front of. Helaena leant back against him, a look of feline contentment on her features as she gazed at me through hooded eyes. 

“What did you want when you came here, Lady Grey?” It wasn’t so much a question as a gentle prompting, an invitation to voice the desire that had drawn me to them like a moth to a bonfire ever since that first time I’d seen them on campus. They’d looked so out of place they might as well have been another species. Two fae royals slumming it with mortals for their own amusement, sampling whatever pleasures they wished to indulge in, and tempting the rest of us with wicked delights if only we’d be bold enough to seek them. 

I ached to be bold.

“You,” I breathed. “Both of you.” 

“Yes, that was it.” Helaena tipped her head up to meet Aemond’s gaze and said “See?”

“Hm.” 

Before I could worry that I was failing some unspoken test he leaned in with that sleek, predatory grace and twisted the door knob by my hip. 

“After you,” he purred. 

Part Two

[immorecooliothanyou]

part 2 (slow updates, sorry)

Scp-096 pov: 

096 felt instant fear as he heard the quiet sounds of moist skin and dripping liquids hitting the cold concrete floor. His breathing get heavier as he felt the overwhelming anxiety rising from his chest to his entire body at this point. He quickly covered his face once again, cowering in fear in front of the other person as he heard the footsteps get closer, and closer… but then they stopped right after the door to the room. ‘A door didn’t open… so are they gone?’ He questioned himself in his mind, his curiosity getting the best of him, which wasn’t really a good thing in his situation. Though he fought the urge to turn around and look behind him to see if someone was there, despite the circumstances. 096 uncovered his face slightly to where only his small blue eyes were showing, he looked at the metal wall in front of him to see a dark ominous shadow standing behind him. The shadow gave 096 an idea of who was behind him; a skinny, but fit, bald figure stood behind him. 096 can’t tell the gender of the mysterious person, though they do seem safe to 096, since they were just standing there doing nothing. But it's not like he could uncover his face, or talk to the other person with his horrible social skills.

Scp-106 pov:

He stands behind the unnaturally pale figure, staring at it with disgust, and maybe even sympathy. This thing was in terrible condition, to a point where it almost made 106 feel bad for it. It looked like a stick bug compared to The Old man, maybe if the stick bug was albino or some shit. Even if 106 felt slight pity for it, he still was disgusted by it. “Dégoûtant…” he muttered under his breath as he stared at the pale figure in front of him, even if he thought he himself was gross looking, he thought this.. thing… was equally, maybe less (but 106 doesn’t think that) as filthy looking as him. He observed the thing with surprise, he never knew something so close to a human could even look like this. It had blood splattered all over it which he expected for an scp that was in heavy containment, and it had some kind of mold or fungus growing on its left shoulder and on his thigh, which was showing since 096 was sitting crisscrossed. Holly fuck. The Old Man genuinely felt bad for this thing, even 106 had more cleanliness than this monstrosity, surprisingly. His expression hardened, the disgusting smell of this creature made 106 want to toss it into a bath and continuously throw bars of soap at it. Even he had more class than this vermin that sits in front of him.

Scp-096  

096 sits there, silently. He trembles with fear, though wondering why the thing behind him hasn’t moved. He takes a small deep breath, trying to calm himself down. But instead of a breath of fresh air, but instead of the air being fresh, he got probably the worst smelling oxygen he could ever have breathed in. Christ, it smelled like absolute shit. ‘Was there a dead animal behind me?’ Shy Guy thought, almost gagging at the heinous smell of the air. It was obvious that that thing behind him was absolutely disgusting, and should definitely take a bath. 096 wanted to say something so bad, though, he was scared about being mean to the person behind him… and just scared of the person in general.

No ones pov:

Both of the anomalies just stayed in this awkward position. The cold room felt warmer with this dumb situation. Both of the anomalies just stood there silently. The room was so silent, they didn’t even get the time to react to the loud dinosaur-like roar that echoed through the facility. 106 jumped slightly, looking towards the room's door, for him loud noises were just one cricket chirping to him. But on the other hand, 096, the one who The Old Man thought to be some kind of low intelligence creature who probably couldn’t speak, let out a loud yelp that made 106 slightly jump too. The old man looked to the direction of the pale man, seeing it now in the corner, covering its face, and hyperventilating. 096 was obviously troubled, but did 106 care? No. The old man stared at the other man for a few moments, before looking at the door of the room. He looked back to The Shy Guy and muttered “Va te préparer un bain.” He glared down at the other man, who was curled up in a ball with his face covered one last time before disappearing into the floor. It was silent. The sound of liquids dripping onto the floor has now gone away. 096 parted his fingers from his eyes, almost certain that the other creature was gone from the room. He was hesitant to turn around, in fear of what could be behind him, though he did it anyway.

There was no one.

096 pov:

096 could’ve sworn he heard, felt, and smelled someone behind him. But could it have been a hoax? What's left of his mind could just be playing tricks on him, he’d blame the foundation. Thinking that it was some kind of weird hallucination, he uncovered his face. 096 let out a sigh of relief and looked back to the… that's not the wall… right in front of 096 were big, white colored orbs staring right at him. He stared back. He knew what would happen, he felt his stomach drop, along with his mouth. His eyes widened.

106 pov:

The old man grinned as he stared at the… “The fuck?!” He let out as he saw the other humanoid's mouth drop unnaturally. That was his favorite thing to say in English, and probably one of his most said phrases that isn’t in French. Anyways, he flinched as he saw the other entity grab for him. He tried to pull back from this lanky creature in front of him, but that thing was way too strong. 106 barely got time to react as he felt something sharp stab into his head. Was it knives? No. It was teeth. He quickly grabbed onto the other person's shoulders, trying to pry himself out of their mouth; it worked, the creature pulled back in pain from 106s corrosive touch. It pushed 106 back into the wall and started bleeding from the corrosion. It went to the opposite corner of the room and put its arms around itself in an attempt to ease the pain as it healed on its own. On the other hand, 106 stared at the pale monstrosity. How that thing looked really interested him, mostly its limbs. 106 stared at that thing curiously, wondering how it got to that point. Normal growth? I couldn’t be. He glanced at their hands… god those hands are big… though, 106’s curiosity was interrupted by the sound of a gun cocking.

sorry to leave y’all on a cliffhanger, i wrote this at 3:26 at night 🙏🦅

[pigeonpalacade]

PLEASE SAY MORE ON THE SAW FIGHT CLUB AU

Your wish is my command!!

So, in terms of character placements I believe narrator is Amanda, Tyler is John and Marla is Lynn. John and Amanda's father-daughter dynamic would be thoroughly disregarded in this au and replaced with Jack and Tyler's original tension from fight club, with the only remnants of the parental angle being the "our fathers were models for god" and "a generation of men raised by women" kind of stuff Tyler harps on about. This version of Tyler is as if project mayhem is the jigsaw murders, I'm honestly not sure what would kick-start it, but when he meets Jack he has got a few kills under his belt, but it would be him solo rather than in an organised group. Speaking of, the space monkeys would be jigsaw apprentices, I doubt there would be as many of them as there were in fight club, but instead of their signifier being bald heads it would probably be grevious injuries/scars from their own saw traps, as well as the more obvious stuff like the coats and the pig heads. Paper Street serves as Kramers strange little warehouse, he would have the space monkeys working on making traps like we see Amanda do in saw 3, but I don't think they would sell anything in this au given the nature of what they're making, so the plane meeting would probably centre around another topic like machinery, Tyler being more familiar with how to make a machine would give him a common ground with Jack's car recall knowledge.

Marla gets changed around quite a bit here, I think her being in the place of Lynn fits in the way that Tyler is trying to convince Jack that she's important to him, but the way Tyler would get her involved is a bit up in the air. If I had to come up with something on the spot I'd say that she could be an trap survivor and meets Jack through a jigsaw survivors support group that he would most definitely attend to see who hadn't learnt their lesson [Tyler doesnt send him to do this, its his own side thing but it does help choose who should be double trapped], then he complains about her to a point that Tyler brings her in to convince him she's made her choice about life or something like that. Her philosophy of life is probably why she got tangled up with jigsaw in the first place. Also she wouldn't have a husband or any children, so the events of saw 3 would be purely focused on our main trio. The saw 3 ending would have Tyler dead, Jack with the neck bullet hole and marla alive, probably having Jack remove the shotgun collar at Tyler's request before they would murder-suicide each other with Tyler missing the shot and hitting Jack's throat, the end to some grand test Tyler was putting Jack through to see if he could survive without him. After this Marla might end up an apprentice herself, or more likely she would keep in contact with Jack and desperately try to get him to turn himself in.

Tyler's whole "the ability to let that which does not matter truly slide" would be cranked up to 11, in the way that someone kramer sees someone squandering their opportunities gets trapped, Tyler would much the same way find people who aren't living their lives to the fullest and trap them in order to 'save them', much in the way he blew up Jack's condo or gave him the lye kiss, it's all in order to get them to reach rock bottom. As previously mentioned, I think support groups would be a big part of it, maybe the reason Jack gets beartrapped is a combination of hating his perfectly good condo life and hanging around jigsaw support groups despite never being trapped, perking Tyler's ears and putting him in the beartrap, just to end up keeping him around as the first apprentice, which would lead perfectly into Jack's jealousy as the saw monkeys increase, he would argue that he was the first apprentice, he should know everything that goes on, which would probably land him in the saw 2 trap for being a bit of a whiny bitch [in Tyler's eyes]. A reason I put Jack in Amanda's place is the obsessive devotion to the mentor figure, but also because I think their scars weirdly match. Book Jack ends up with scars on either side of his mouth, which in this au would be caused by the beartrap, and Amanda has the bullet wound for saw 3, which coincides with the placement of movie Jack's bullet wound.

I haven't thought about who I would put in the other major character's shoes, such as Adam, Lawrence, Hoffman and Strahm, but I like the placements I've got now which puts a strangely heavy emphasis on saw 3 despite how much more I like saw 1. If you have any thing to add do not hesitate to do so!!! I'd love to discuss how this could go further :3

[mlstrm2077]

Bald-Headed Bastard | Vile x Royce🗡⛓

I made this about 3 months ago for myself and shared it with a close friend, but I've decided to post it here as well. Just a short [in my eyes] fic exploring the dynamic of my OC Vile's relationship with Royce. Royce probably seems slightly OOC as he's a bit playful and slightly affectionate. This was the first fic I’d written in a while so although I like it, it’s also a bit all over the place.

SFW - 1100+ words - OC x Canon

[Vile's POV]

No one really thinks about how hard it is to read human emotions whenever crucial elements for reading them are removed. Things such as eyebrows, eyes, and mouths were critical in being able to read a person’s current mood. A great example of such was police interviews and questioning, and the way that professionals were trained to notice any change in a person’s behavior at certain questions and inquiries, like if a person’s eyebrow furrowed as being asked a certain question, or the corners of their mouth twitching in response to something.

When you remove some or all of those elements, it can become near impossible to read how someone feels in a current moment and react accordingly. That’s part of what made Maelstrom so intimidating to many people. Of course, the murderous rages, short tempers, and general sense of mayhem and chaos didn’t help either, but if you encountered a lone Maelstrom goon, it could be near impossible to gauge their emotion and react accordingly, lest you receive a bullet through your skull.

Royce was no different. In fact, he was even more of a risk with his inherently hot-headed nature. Even I myself wasn’t sure how I’d managed to escape his wrath a few times. The thought process rolled through my mind as I was laying with him, my head on his chest and body at his side. It was rare we had intimate moments together, likely because either one of us was busy on the next job, or simply wasn’t in a place to do so. Royce refused almost any romantic or intimate gestures outside of privacy. I suspected it was because he feared others could perceive it as a weakness, but I knew he’d never tell me.

He must have realized how long I’d been glazing over him, and looked back at me. It was hard to even tell if someone from Maelstrom was looking at you sometimes, with the typical lack of humanoid eyes, but it was impossible to escape the sense of being watched nonetheless. A small chuff came from him at my blank expression, yet obvious deep-thought.

“The fuck are you staring at?” He asked.

I was quiet at the question, not expecting to be confronted on my thoughts. Somehow, even with my own modifications, Royce was always able to read how I felt. Maybe he was more attentive than myself in that regard, or he had been among fellow members of the gang to passively learn how to perceive their thoughts in a way the average person couldn’t.

A small smirk tugged at his lips as he watched me and my lack of a response. “Admiring how damn handsome I am?” He asked with a small tilt of his head.

I couldn’t help but let out a small chuff of my own at the question, smiling softly. I knew he was just lightening the aura with the question. Royce had a huge sense of self-confidence in many areas, but he knew he was no model. Either way, I still found an odd sense of attraction in him, despite the things that might seem unattractive to the average person; the larger size, influenced by fat and a belly, the horrific modifications which quite literally went as far back as his brain, and his hairless head to mention a few.

“Maybe.” I responded, knowing it’d stroke his little ego. “I was just thinking of how hard it is to read people when you remove stuff like eyebrows and eyes.” I finally clarified, directing the conversation from lightly flirty to casual.

Royce’s expression settled into his neutral as I spoke, seemingly waiting for me to continue somehow, as if I had more on my mind. Maybe I did, and yet he realized it before I ever did. He had a way of reading me like that, even with the poker face. After a small pause of me staring at him, another thought did pop into my mind. 

How did he look before all of his modifications?

“What color eyes did you have before the initiation?” I prodded. I got a scoff in response. “Why does that matter?” He asked with a raised lip, as if he was somehow offended at the question. “I’m just curious…” I responded.

This time, he was the one who paused for a moment, seemingly conflicting if he wanted to tell me anything or not. “What do you think?” He asked. Despite having never heard the question before, my response was almost immediate.

“Blue.”

My response seemed to take him off-guard for a moment, before he let out a loud and hearty laugh. “Fuckin’ blue?! Why the hell blue of all things?” He questioned between laughs. Royce almost always threw out more curse words than was necessary, but he did it even more when he was feeling strong emotion like excitement or anger. A charming, if not slightly grating at times trait.

His laughing left me a bit flustered. “You’re the one who asked… that’s just what I’ve always guessed.” I said, watching as his laughter quieted down, leaving him with a shitty smirk. “Always? You’ve thought of this shit before?” He inquired. I’m not sure I had thought of it before. Maybe I had, but just didn’t recall right now. That isn’t an especially valuable thing to keep in your long-term memory.

“Well, am I right?” I responded, choosing not to acknowledge his last question. “I’m not fuckin’ telling you, gonk.” He said, leaning his head back casually. I knew he wouldn’t, but hearing his reaction to my answer was still worth it.

“Bald-headed bastard.” I called him saltily, gaining a confused look from him on why he was suddenly being insulted. Even lacking many of the crucial traits mentioned earlier, his body-language and the way his lips raised was enough to tell how he felt.  I looked at and suddenly gained a smirk of my own. “I’d call you a baby-headed bastard, but even babies are born with a bit of hair on their head.”

“Oh, piss off.” He responded grumpily, not taking the fact that he was now the one being teased well. Honestly though, he was taking it well given his personality. If anyone else in the world said such a thing to him, they’d gain a one-way ticket to whatever exists after this reality. There was a bond between us that didn’t really have a title which contributed to that not happening. We certainly weren’t married, and weren’t ‘dating’, but were also more than friends, and more than occasional flings. I wanted to say it was ‘love’ but that term didn’t necessarily feel right either. I didn’t feel the need to label our relationship with anything though, and neither did he.

Note: 🗡⛓ is now my official emoji combo for Vile x Royce and I'll be tagging any future content involving their ship with it.

[theultimatekamehamehavoc]

More Random Headcanons - Semi Togiri Edition (semi cus it's not THAT coded as Togiri though it can be read that way!)

· Kyoko is really good at wearing heels. She can also run pretty well in them though she doesn't like to do it that much. Last thing she wants is twisting an ankle on a case! · Byakuya acts like he forgets the names of people because they're too "unimportant" or that they're just "no-named peasants". However, he's actually just bad at remembering names. He's got so much stuff up there in that noggin of his that names are the thing he flounders on. · Kyoko can't snap to save her life but she whistles pretty good. Byakuya is jealous as hell. He acts like he's not being obvious but Kyoko sees right through him. Even if she wasn't a detective, she'd notice. · When Byakuya tries not to laugh at something he internally believes is beneath him or just outright goofy, he tries his best to look annoyed or mad. The heir does this by facepalming or putting a hand at his temple like his head is in pain. It's both to cope and to not look like an idiot. Also, despite acting like his head's hurting, it never is. Only thing that's hurting the prospect of the heir's pride crumbling before his eyes. · Kyoko sometimes twirls her little hair braid when she's speaking or thinking. Or both. She doesn't intend to do this and it's just a small fidget she's been doing for years. Byakuya likes teasing her for it since she does it without her noticing. In turn though, Kyoko teases Byakuya for his tsundere glasses adjustment. · Byakuya hates the Mr. Krabs, Elon Musk jokes and the Ben Shapiro comparison jokes at his expense. Like, what do they think he is? Dumb? Oh please! For the Mr. Krabs part, hates it when people chalk up what he does and his whole personality as "I like money". He's also sick and tired of people assuming he'd be a Crypto Bro and that he's into NFT's. · Kyoko dislikes fast food for different reasons Byakuya does. She especially has the gripe of everything looking brown and breaded and fried. It just throws her off. She could stomach the food though unlike Byakuya who's just a bit of a wimp and a drama queen about it. He also doesn't have that strong of a stomach for that kind of food. · Byakuya is deathly afraid that he'll get male-patter baldness. Doesn't even matter if he physically can or not. He's just doesn't wanna be bald. He loves his luscious locks. He also totally didn't freak out when one of his classmates showed him an edited pic of him bald. Both cus, bald, but also cus he didn't think he looked that bad. Even worse! · Kyoko isn't too fond of crocs but she'd wear them to annoy the living shit out of Byakuya. Byakuya finds crocs oversaturating, overrated, and feels just a WEE bit betrayed that Kyoko would fall this low. · Byakuya hates it when people categorize chocolate as "candy" and also despises that word in general. To him, chocolate is in its own category. · Kyoko doesn't understand fashion trends. It's not like she doesn't like fashion. She just doesn't understand the obsession with these trends that go in and out of style.

· Byakuya also doesn't get fashion trends but for different reasons. Specifically, he doesn't get the obsession the peasants have and finds them idiotic for having small attention spans. · Kyoko likes to savor her food and never gets the people who purposely rush. She can sometime forget that she was initially eating a meal though which can lead into her not getting enough to eat. · Byakuya likes arson. And fire. It makes him very happy and he hides it internally. He doesn't like the action movie fires and explosions cus they bore him. He's into the real deal. Minus the inhaling of smoke cus that blows! · Kyoko's fine with carbonated drinks. She's not one to drink them the majority of the time and she doesn't get the people who are obsessed with sodas. Byakuya's the same way in regards of not getting the obsession with these types of drinks. Byakuya also dislikes them for being way too sugary and the carbon hurts his throat. · Byakuya's never got the obsession the populous has with asses and he probably never will. Might not help that his is flat. · Kyoko has several back up pairs of gloves in case of emergencies. She also has some ones she uses for sleep. She would also like to build a collection of of more gloves besides her base ones but she can't seem to fully commit to it.

· Byakuya hates crabs, alive and dead. He refuses to delve into why. · Kyoko and Byakuya hate summer. They can't wear their favorite clothes when it's too hot. Kyoko has more heat resistance while Byakuya has less heat resistance. Not that both of them have bad heat resistance. They can handle it but they still both don't like the heat. · The two like to read in silence and also discuss books together. Kyoko and Byakuya specifically bond over mystery books and also bad mystery books too in which they dunk the bad twists. · As platonic homies, they've gone on a few outings together. They usually chill in silence though they do chat about stuff occasionally.

· Kyoko and Byakuya like taking turns doing each other's hair. Byakuya likes doing elaborate braids with Kyoko's hair that she never really goes out with anyway. Kyoko also likes braiding Byakuya's hair as well. She once did a secret braid in his hair when he took a brief power nap (unintentionally. he was just exhausted that day) and it took him a whole 3 days to notice. Here's the previous post btw!