#but damn she just dropped that into the convo so casually!!
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cower-before-power · 4 days ago
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Okay, so I was just supposed to find out my Lords of Fortune Rook was a Tevinter galley slave before being rescued from an offhand convo with Taash??? Hello????
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ventique18 · 1 year ago
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University of Twisted Wonderland - Malleus Draconia - 20210666
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His I.D. 6 months after he meets his now girlfriend Yuu (she vandalized it, absolutely wrecked it when they drank a bit too much at his apartment):
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Some university first meeting HCs between Malmal and Yuu-chan!
Malleus attended uni earlier than normal, while Yuu was late. Because of that, Malleus is her upperclassman despite her actually being two years older than he is.
They fell in love at first sight during one fated lunch rush. Yuu is an assertive woman and dropped her handkerchief by his feet, while he purposely stepped on it so he could offer to clean it and thus ensure to meet her again next time. She, like the opportunist she is, gives him her phone number so he could call her anytime he's ready to give it back.
Upon seeing that accident, Sebek reveals that he's blockmates with Yuu as they're both first years and take the same undergraduate program. Malleus smirks to himself victoriously at that-- he had access to her entire class schedule just like that.
He's excited to accidentally bump into her during the course of the year.
He lives alone in an apartment within the campus because he doesn't know how to drive a car. He prefers walking to wherever he needs to go.
She lives in a dormitory with friends as her hometown is some faraway province.
They got physically close during the freshmen welcoming party because of the damn jail booth. Her friends paid to get the organizers to capture and lock him in a room with her. At first, they actually couldn't get a hold of him because of how fast he moves, but her friends in desperation screamed at him to "please just give Yuuyuu a kiss and then you can go on your merry way". He actually casually walked with the capturers to "jail".
The condition to get out was to kiss and take a selfie or waste an hour in there.
He walked in with all the poise and cocksure smile in the world, because he knows he'd get that kiss within the first minute and spend the rest of the hour teasing her as she begged him for deeper kisses.
He ended up sitting beside her and staring at the wall like an idiot. For 55 minutes. There were some occasional conversation topics but all answers were awkward because they were so. Shy.
Their convo became more natural on the 45th minute mark. 55 minutes in, she leans a hand on his lap so she could give him a peck on the mouth. She quickly withdraws, but as if some god suddenly gave him Herculean strength (not that he doesn't literally have that already lol), he pulls her back to him by the nape of her neck and dives in deeper.
"Your handkerchief..." He breathes out and actually pulls it out of his pocket to give it back to her.
She takes it, wipes off her lipstick with it, and then shoves it back to him. "Please clean it again for me. Give me a call when it's ready."
He laughs loudly and, driven by happy adrenaline, pulls her back in.
At the 60th minute mark, the facilitators unlock the door and sees her straddling him, hair wild and clothes ruffled, only a few nudges from actually undressing him then and there. He's not innocent either with his hands already resting suspiciously near the sides of her chest.
"... You know the kiss was any kiss, right? Even a kiss on the hand would do..." The facilitator mumbles.
They couldn't meet anyone in the eyes while they walk away from the jail booth, lol.
>> To be continued when I feel like it
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yaasirambles · 10 months ago
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FRAT BOY JAEHYUN TRYING TO ASK YOU OUT BUT YOU NEVER REALLY NOTICED HIM BECAUSE YOU’RE ACADEMIC WEAPON ERA IS SKYROCKETING. then you had a one night stand with him when you got drunk and now he can’t stop thinking of you being on your knees and he n e e d s you like NOW
FratBoy!Jaehyun you meet at a party ur friend was hosting and begging you to go to because "you need to get out of the house. Let loose. Stop studying so damn much. It won't kill you for one night 🙄"
You give in. Get all dressed up and hot. Suddenly you see a boy from one of your GE classes. Jaehyun. He comes in with some other guys. You strike up a convo talking about the class. You felt comfortable talking with him since you previously were partnered for a past project for Bio. and he asks you how you got to the party. You explain its a party your friend and her sorority girls are hosting as a collab with one of the frats. "Oh. I'm in that frat. That's why I'm here" he laughs. "No kidding. I kinda saw that coming" you tease him since he totally looks the type.
The night goes on and you two kinda stick by each other. Talking. Drinking. Not too much. But enough to get relaxed and a little more bold and touchy. You're sitting on the couch together and his arm is around your shoulder. Your body relaxed into his side. His fingers lightly scratching your arm. You turn your head to look at him. He's sooo fucking hot. And you just kiss his neck. He's surprised and then chuckles softly "you good?" He looks down at you. "Just letting myself do something I want for once" you whispers and bite his skin a little. He groans and then whispers "Let's go to a room" and you nod. You lead him to your friends room where she said you could stay for the night if anything. You pull him in and close the door. Activities ensue
You see him in class a few days later. You haven't talked about the hook up. But neither of you can stop thinking about it. He looks at you in class and his mind runs wild with the memories of you gripping onto him, nails dragging down his back and moaning his name. Every time he fucking sees you in class or on campus it all floods back and he can't take it.
He texts you one day "Hey. Can we study together? This exam has me nervous" So you let him come over to your place. Your hair clipped up in a hair clip. Some strands around your face. A tight shirt hugging your body. Casual Lil shorts. He groans to himself. He tries to study with you. But he can't take it anymore. He drops his pencil on "accident" and you squat down to pick it up. You feel his eyes on you and you look up at him. "You good?" You ask him and he doesn't answer. His palm caresses your cheek and his thumb swipes over your bottom lip. You open your mouth and he slides his thumb him. You start sucking on it. And he groans "fuck. You look so fucking pretty on your knees like that. Been thinking about it for so long" and your tongue swirls around his thumb. You look up at him innocently and settle on your knees. Your hands rubbing the tops of his thighs before you start to undo his belt and unzip his pants...
Some type of bio studying was done, maybe more of a hands on anatomy lesson? 🤭
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xmycxx · 1 year ago
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Football!Abby x tennis!reader
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A/N: K I've seen a fuckton of tennis AU's and i wanted to write one bc it fulfills my heart and makes me happy
Context
also just imagine her in that jacket flirting with you
k first off, let's say this is a college thing bc it makes it easier
like, Abby is the quarterback of the college football team, and college football is fuckin HUGE so she gets a lot of fame for it and loves loves LOVES the spotlight, but is super humble about it
ngl college tennis, not very hyped up, but super fun
my info on college tennis is secondhand but my info on tennis in general is firsthand so bear with me on this :))
Meet cute
but it's not really a meet cute
the football peeps found a few spare rackets somewhere and started fucking around on the tennis courts just before you're meant to practice
you gave up on tryna get them off so you're sat on the bleachers, just kinda getting some work done and waiting for them to get off while your friends are tryna bully them off the courts
abby, dear, respectful abby, has been tryna herd them off of the courts bc she thinks one of you will snipe them in the face
i have and it's so fuckin fun
eventually, even she gives up
and sees you in like, an oversized white sweatshirt and some cute leggings and just casually comes over to you, spotting your giant tennis bag (im sorry these mf's are giant)
and normally confident abby who can get anyone she wants is so nervous to start talking to you bc she thinks you might scold her
so she just sorta sits there, fidgeting and tryna think of a convo starter
and you see her out of the corner of your eye, and you know about her, but you're kinda pissed at the court situation so you don't give her the reprieve of starting a convo
but then you glance at her, and feel super bad bc she looks so nervous and she might actually get up and leave out of embaressment
so you accidentally drop your pencl next to where she's sitting and ask her to pick it up
and she gets so excited and does so, and you start the convo, talking about coursework or something
convo flows easily but eventually wanders to her hooligan teammates refusing to get off the court, and a few of them are close to getting sniped bc your team is starting to serve
she just kinda chuckles in embaressment, doesn't try to make excuses, just kinda agrees that they shouldn't do that
it makes you like her, a lot more than you previously would've
and abby sees that realization on your face, and her confidence comes back full force
"Hey, I actually had a question." Abby said, sliding closer to you on the bleacher. Your eyebrow raised a bit at the action, and to her surprise, you moved your tennis bag to the side so she could come closer.
"And what might that be?" You asked, your tone light and teasing as you went forward on your elbows, leaning closer to her. You saw her audibly gulp at the action, almost forgetting where she was going with this.
"Can i maybe," She began, barely suppressing the urge to scratch her neck nervously. "Get your number?"
Your eyes widened at how forward she was. Half your mind was made to decline the request and move your stuff to the other side of the bleachers, well aware of her reputation to get anyone she wants.
But she stopped you before you could say anything, running like a train through your thoughts of how to let her down slowly.
"I mean, just so I can tell my team when they can fuck around the courts," She scratched her neck, obviously nervous, oblivious to how the action made her arm flex. "So we don't bother you, and maybe so I can see you when you aren't about to hit one of them in the head."
You laughed.
Abby swore up and down that finding those spare rackets was the best thing that they ever did. Because now that she heard that? God damn she wanted to do that all day.
Her team left minutes ago, but she was making sure your name was on her phone, and you left to practice with a grin on your face. A matching grin on her face as she watched your practice for a few minutes before her friends dragged her away.
A/N: K i mightttt do a bit more of this later, thoughts?
Feel free to send in requests for this or tattoo!artist ellie
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cassandralexxx · 10 months ago
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nahhh I took the L and was called classist bc I told a girly eating moldy bread was inadvisable. Tell me why not even a week later girly bought a $200 device on a whim on self described “daddy’s credit card” 😭😭😭
like maybe I need to adjust my frame of mind bc like both statements can be true. But it’s not like she was looking forward to the device she was just at the store and thought it was cool. Like I’d figure there’s a middle ground between eating moldy bread levels of financial insecurity and dropping 200 for the vibes. (Yes people who are poor deserve nice things and maybe I’m wrong but 200 is a Lot to do on a whim I’d get it if it was like a planned treat but just because???)
Original post February 9
update February 17:
nah so foul she did not need to call me classist. First off to reiterate I wasn’t mean/rude about it. I was just like:
“you really shouldn’t eat moldy bread because with the way bread is even if you cut out the mold parts there can still be spores that aren’t visible”
she was like: “well bread molds very quickly”
so I was like (drawing from earlier convo): “oh yeah 100% that’s why I either refrigerate my bread or put it in the freezer!”
her: “well you’re classist for saying that because some people have food insecurity and can’t throw out food like that”
So I was like oh damn maybe I should reevaluate my biases (ignoring that yknow that doesn’t change that bread isn’t good for you moldy and I actively do the most to not contribute food waste on the regular already”
But anyways today she mentioned that yeah her dad was poor but her mom was rich. And her dad is wealthy now. And like with almost every convo she mentions something that is just so casually wealthy. And it’s like!! she can afford to not eat moldy bread my little science advisory wasn’t being classist because we aren’t of different social classes 😭😭😭
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zepskies · 1 year ago
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@iprobablyshipit91 Hey friend!! So happy to get your thoughts on this. 😍😍
Ooh yes, the plot is hitting right, left, and center on this one. 😂 The connections will start to really knit together in a couple of chapters, but I know your gears are already turning. loll
John is definitely keeping secrets from his sons, I just hope it’s for the right reasons and it doesn’t come back to bite anyone in the arse.
Ha! Because that's never happened in canon. 😂😂 Cas is definitely going to be a help in the long-run.
Lmfaooo I loved writing Meg in this one. 😂 She's kind of a wild card character and it's been fun to keep Cas and Dean on their toes with her. (Especially with the "I stole your BF line." 🤣)
The bit about the tv shows really made me smile - made me think of our conversations lol. Oh and dean watching smallville is hilarious
LOL I knew you of all people would appreciate that little easter egg!
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I liked the tidbit about not dropping friends when you get a boyfriend. I think that can happen all too often, hopefully it won’t be the case here as Andrea seems a good friend.
I love that you chimed in on this part as well because that's going to be a future plot point. 😶‍🌫️
Oh dear Gordon. Fair enough he didn’t know about her relationship with dean, though I did feel his ‘shooting’ was quite pushy. His and deans conversation after was quite stiff, I’m trying to work out if there’s a past there. Have they tried for the same woman before? Is it almost like a competition? Whatever it was, it doesn’t feel over.
Omg you're literally the best at reading the vibes I try to put out. 😂 So you're heading in the right direction for sure with "a past." Not necessarily competing over women, but there's definitely an underlying friction between Dean and Gordon that will be explored in a couple of chapters.
The double date with Cas and Meg started out really fun. I enjoyed the light teasing and I love Ellen so seeing her be motherly to dean was lovely. But then Meg did take it a bit far. She perhaps wasn’t wrong with her comments about deans past but it really isn’t fair to bring that up at this point as she did.
Yep you're absolutely right loll. Meg was drunk, so Dean might forgive her, but it wasn't cool. And then Jo coming at the reader from the other side lol. Dean and the reader are going to have many a challenge in this relationship. 😅
But damn that conversation with John! I’m glad he’s finally told more to dean. If he’s going into these fires he needs to know what he’s getting himself into. But the plot thickens and I look forward to seeing where this goes. The burn marks, and Azazel.
Ikr? It's like on one hand, it's a relief that John finally told him a bit of what's going on. On the other hand, probably could've told him in person to help his son from not reeling as much. 😅
But there is a lot to go with that end of the plot. I'm working on the later chapters now, and I'm sorry for the tease, but I cannot wait until you guys see how it all threads together. 😂 I think it's going to be fun.
The next conversation with the reader… I mean it needed to happen but I felt for dean, it probably was the last thing on his mind considering the news he just had but equally the reader has been left in a really crappy position and is reading things into his behaviour that have nothing to do with her.
Yeah I totally agree with what you're saying here. It's a necessary convo, but difficult for Dean considering how much is on his mind already. She equally has been through a lot tonight loll.
I’m glad he was truthful though, both about not wanting to be casual and as much of the real reason his mind was elsewhere as he could. And it was lovely to see the reader just be there for him without pressing for more details or anything like that.
Yeah I didn't want to draw that part of the drama out to much and just let him be as honest as he could be, about both issues. That way we got to the hurt/comfort of it all! But regardless, because you know me, there will be more drama ahead. 😂
You know I’m obsessed with this story and I absolutely cannot wait to read more 💕 you’re doing an amazing job of building up the story, characters and relationships!
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Thank you SO, SO much, lovely!! I'm doing my best on this AU. There are a lot of threads and I'm trying to hang on to all of 'em. 😂
But I'm so glad you like what I'm doing so far. Your thoughts and encouragements brighten up my day and help keep me invested as I work on finishing this story! 💕💕
Smoke Eater - Part 6
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Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. Reader 
Summary: Dean Winchester is the cocky, but well-respected Lieutenant at Firehouse 25. He leads by example, but he’s also known to break a few hearts. He’s starting to crave something he’s never had, though. Something stable. Something real. 
That’s when he meets you, on a truly terrible day, trapped in a rickety old elevator.   
🔥Series Masterlist
Word Count: 7,000 Tags/Warnings: Fluff, jealousy, angst, hurt/comfort
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Part 6: “Just Casual”
A few days after the house fire that claimed the life of Paul Richardson, father of two, Chief Bobby Singer was joined in his office by Detectives Winchester and Novak, along with his resident Squad Captain and Truck Lieutenant, Benny and Dean.
“The Richardson fire has officially been determined an arson,” Bobby revealed.
“They found a time-delay incendiary device hidden in the attic. No fingerprints. But that’s not even the odd thing,” he said. “The medical examiner found a brand mark on his wrist that was inconsistent with his other burns. Which is why you’re here, I reckon.”
Bobby directed his gaze at both John and Cas, who didn’t look surprised to hear this news.
Dean raised a brow. His gaze shifted to his father, but John only met his stare for a moment before he answered Bobby’s unspoken question.
“We’ve been investigating a series of murders in the area over the past six months,” John said. “Each victim died in their home, with the same brand somewhere on their body. Typically the wrist, or the back of the neck.”
“So we officially have a serial killer turned arsonist on our hands,” Bobby concluded. His attention shifted to Benny and Dean. “Keep this close to the vest, but keep your eyes open.”
“Arsonists are hard to catch,” Dean said, looking to the detectives. “What do you know about this guy?”
Cas glanced at John. The older man could feel his stare, but had to ignore it for now.
“Not much as of yet,” John said. “Right now he’s a coil of smoke, if you’ll pardon the phrase. Our psychologist says he’s most likely a white male, statistically speaking. College educated, or at the very least intelligent, efficient, and so far, he thinks every step through. Like he said, no prints. But the brand is a message.”
“To who, and why, is what we’ve been trying to figure out,” Cas added. “We think that’s the key to pinpointing a suspect.”
“Really,” Dean said. He raised a brow and crossed his arms. “Six months, and that’s all you’ve got?”
“Dean,” John started, but the Lieutenant shook his head.
“Come on, Dad. I know you. Who is this guy?”
“Dean, this is the best I can give you right now, but believe me, we’re working on it,” John said, that tone that boded no further argument.
Bullshit, Dean wanted to shoot back. But he held his tongue for now. He knew that John wouldn’t budge. Instinct still told Dean that his father was holding something back though.
As the men filtered out of Bobby’s office, Dean held Cas back for a moment.
“Watch the old man’s back, all right,” Dean said. “He’s got a penchant for being reckless.”
Cas gave him a wry, pointed look. “I’m doing my best. Winchesters are a stubborn lot.” 
Dean smirked and walked out with him. Meg was headed inside, having just come in from an ambulance call. She smiled when she saw her boyfriend.
“Hey, lover,” she greeted. And she smacked his ass in front of God and the entire Rescue Squad, who liked to sit outside the firehouse and play cards at their table.
Ramirez and the others smirked and called out their customary whoops and cat calls. Dean smirked at the actual blushing discomfort that tightened up Cas’s face and shoulders.
“Dinner tonight at Casablanca’s, right?” Meg asked, unfazed by the catcalling peanut gallery.
“Right,” Cas said stiffly. But he still brushed her cheek with his thumb in affection. “See you later.”
“Yep,” she nodded, though she shot Dean a wry brow. “What? I stole your boyfriend. Get over it.”
She continued on her path back inside the firehouse, leaving Dean and Cas to stare after her in annoyance and begrudging fondness, respectively.
Dean turned to his friend and clapped him on the shoulder.
“Good luck and Godspeed, my friend. That woman’s fuckin’ terrifying.” 
Cas gave him a lazy salute as he walked away. He found that John had already started up their police car. He was in the driver’s seat, as always, with a hand resting casually on the steering wheel.
Dean typically sat in much the same way. Cas thought both men were more comfortable in a car than anywhere else in life. Except, maybe, the precinct and the firehouse.
Cas slid into the passenger seat and gave his partner a knowing look.
“I still think you should tell Sam and Dean what’s really happening here,” he said.
John looked over at him with an almost unreadable expression. But they had been partners for a few years now; long enough for Cas to get a read on the older veteran.
“I understand why you want to keep them out of this, but now this guy is starting fires. Here, in Dean’s district,” Cas pointed out. “Wouldn’t it be safer for him if he had clearer eyes walking into the next one?”
If, God forbid, something should go wrong on the next call Dean responded to, John would never forgive himself. Both he and Cas knew this, but John never answered his partner’s question. He didn’t want his sons getting their noses in this just yet, even if it meant the worry he saw in Dean’s eyes.
So he put the car in “drive” and peeled away from the firehouse.
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Trying to match your schedule with Dean’s was a challenge you two were trying to figure out. Though you’d fallen into a pattern of talking on the phone to fill the void when you two couldn’t meet.
Even after almost two more weeks and a third date, you were pleasantly surprised that you and Dean still had plenty to talk about. You told him more about your childhood with your grandparents, while he told you funny stories about him and Sam growing up with their dad, though he was often gone while working on cases.
It was family friend and Fire Chief, Bobby Singer who looked after them whenever John couldn’t, or his old partner Jody Mills, or even Ellen Harvelle, owner of the Roadhouse.
The more you learned about Dean, the more invested you became. And he listened to you when you went on tangents about new recipes you wanted to try out (as long as he got to be your official Taste Tester).
You two argued, playfully and fervently, about music. And you’d been creating a list of old shows the other hadn’t seen, but absolutely needed to.
Dean had suggested Dukes of Hazzard, for example, while you suggested Smallville. You each only agreed to put up with this list if you two watched it together. (Needless to say, there would be some marathon binge watching in your future.)
That was why you didn’t think much of it when Dean invited you to join him at the Roadhouse to meet Cas, one of his best friends, and his girlfriend Meg. You’d invited Andréa to come along, and even Dean’s friend Benny, who she’d also been seeing ever since that night at the Roadhouse.
Apparently, the couple had their own plans.
You tried not to feel some type of way about her brush-off, but your friend had been increasingly distant since she met Benny Lafitte. However, you supposed you couldn’t judge. You hadn’t been calling her as much either, ever since you met Dean.
You knew that if you kept dating him, some adjustments would have to come in your life. You also promised yourself that you’d never be someone who forgot your friends for a man…even for a man like Dean Winchester.
Tonight, however, you’d come directly from work to meet him at the bar. It made more sense than to make him come pick you up from your house, so you sat with a ginger ale while you waited. He’d promised you via text that he was on the way, just stuck in traffic.
Okay, drive safe. 😘 Don’t speed, please.
You knew how he liked floor the Impala with that damn lead foot of his.
No promises. 🏎️
You wanted to roll your eyes, but you were smiling unconsciously as you read his reply.
You were soon knocked out of your thoughts when a smooth voice said your name. You looked up and to your right, and there stood a familiar face. The man greeted you with an easy smile as he sat down next to you.
“I thought that was you,” he said. He reached out his hand and re-introduced himself. “Gordon Walker. Not sure if you remember me.”
“Oh, yes! Of course I do, Gordon,” you smiled and shook his hand.
“It’s good to see you again,” he said. His dark eyes subtly took you in from head to toe in your skirt, heels, and blouse. “Though I’ve gotta admit, I’ve never seen you here before.”
“Ah, right,” you said. “Well—”
Before you could explain, Gordon held up a finger as he noticed your drink of choice.
“Oh, wait a sec. Let me get you something stronger than soda,” he said. He started to flag down Jo, but you shook your head and made a cutting motion with your hand.
“Uh, no, that’s okay,” you said. “I’m waiting for someone.”
“What?” Gordon asked.
It was getting busy in the bar, making it loud enough that you could understand why he hadn’t heard you. You leaned over towards his ear.
“I’m good for now, thanks,” you said, raising your voice a bit. Gordon leaned in even closer and chanced resting a hand above your knee.
“You sure?” he asked. He gave you a smile that was all smooth sex appeal and confidence, without being arrogant.
It was undoubtedly attractive, but you were more shocked than charmed in your blush. You instinctively leaned back when you felt his hand on your thigh. Your hand clenched on the counter.
While your brain scrambled to figure out a response that would successfully remove it (without snapping rudely like you were itching to), a hand slipped along your lower back.
You jolted a bit in your seat with a flare of unease, until you turned your head and found Dean.
“Hey, baby,” he greeted, and dropped a kiss at your hairline. He also clapped a heavy hand on Gordon’s shoulder and squeezed. The other man graciously got the hint and leaned back, withdrawing his hand from your thigh.
“Hi,” you said, finally able to breathe a bit easier. You gave Dean a smile, and he returned it.
He looked over at his friend with a sharper smile. “Hey, Gord. How’s your night goin’?”
“Good.” Gordon nodded, now with a knowing gleam in his eye. “Though I’m sure your night’s gonna go better.”
You weren’t sure how to take that remark, considering the way Dean reacted with a tighter expression and pursed lips. Then, they flickered at a smile.
“Well, we’re meeting up with Meg and Cas in a minute. You should join us,” Dean said. Even though his tone wasn’t so very inviting. The two men seemed to have a wordless conversation between the lines that you couldn’t decipher.
Gordon shook his head, but raised his drink. “No worries, you guys hang. I’m leaving in a few.”
“All right. Let us know if you change your mind,” Dean said. He thumped Gordon once more on the back, more friendly this time.
Dean’s other hand slipped around your waist. He tapped you on the side.
“Come on, I’ve got us a table. It’s quieter,” he said.
You nodded and slid out of your seat. You offered Gordon a polite smile, even if you’d rather not.
“Have a good night,” you said.
The other man’s smile was less flirtatious and more polite this time as well.
“You too,” he said. 
Dean helped you onto your feet, like the gentleman he was, and he continued to lead you away from the bar with a hand on the small of your back. You instinctively pressed against his side to squeeze past the throng of patrons.
When you reached a high-top table in the corner, he pulled out your chair and held your hand as you climbed up in your skirt. You thanked him with a more genuine smile. Though once he was seated next to you, you leaned towards him and laid a hand on his arm, which rested on the table.
“I tried to tell him I was waiting for you. He took me by surprise,” you whispered.
Dean’s brows rose, but his face soon evened out with a smile. He tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Don’t worry about it. He didn’t know about us,” he said. “He was shootin’ his shot…a bit aggressively. Sorry about that.”
“Oh…it’s okay. Nothing I haven’t dealt with before,” you replied. Though butterflies ran through your belly when you considered what us meant.
You noted his frown at what you’d said though, and so you aimed to change the subject.
“But Cas and Meg know, right?” you asked.
Dean nodded. His frown started to lift. “Yeah. Cas is one of my best friends. Meg is…well. She’s the little sister I wish I didn’t have.”
You shook your head in amusement. Then you let out a squeal as Dean hooked a foot around the leg of your chair and brought you closer. He stopped you from becoming too unbalanced by wrapping an arm around your waist. You clenched your hands into the open panels of his plaid shirt, and his charming smile greeted you.
“Hi,” he said.
You laughed. “Yeah, you mentioned that earlier.”
“Well, I’m doing it right this time,” he said. And he dipped down for a lingering kiss.
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Across the bar was Jo Harvelle, doing her job behind the counter. She poured five shots in succession and doled them out to a party of frat bros without even looking.
Her eyes were drawn to the back corner of the bar, where you and Dean sat closely together, exchanging whispers and the occasional steamy kiss.
“Mind your business,” came Ellen’s whisper in her ear.
Jo whipped her head to glare softly at her mother, but she saw Ellen’s point. It was both obvious and pathetic of her to stare.
Despite the unease making her feel a bit sick to her stomach, Jo went over to Gordon down at the end. His sympathetic smile bothered her; she knew then she hadn’t just been caught by her mother.
“Interesting, isn’t it?” he remarked.
“What?” Jo said. She began wiping down his area of the counter. “Would it kill you to keep it in the glass?”
Gordon gave her an amused look as he sat back in his seat. His tumbler of whiskey was drained.
“Look, I’m sorry, all right?” he said.
Both of them knew he wasn’t apologizing for the spill.
Jo’s brows knitted together, mostly in annoyance. “Again, for what?”
“I know it’s gotta be hard to see him actually moving on,” he replied.
Her lips pursed, and her eyes darted to the back of the room again. She stared for a moment at the side of your face.
“Knowing him, whatever it is won’t last,” she muttered.
Gordon hissed at the "burn," with a deep chuckle. She knew her words weren’t kind, but it was how she felt.
“That may be,” he allowed. “But he’s not just chasing tail anymore. That’s what scares you.” 
Gordon dropped a nice tip for her next to his glass. He grabbed his coat off the back of his chair and left Jo with the churning in her gut.
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Cas and Meg finally arrived a few minutes later.
Dean knew you’d been to the Roadhouse before, but this was different. You were meeting some of his friends, and he realized how much he wanted you to. He felt…comfortable around you. And he wanted his friends to know you, and to like you.
“As you know, Meg’s our Paramedic in Charge over at 25,” he began, gesturing at the woman as she got settled in her seat.
You admired her long brown hair, tall boots, and black leather jacket. She seemed to ooze confidence and dark charisma as she tossed you a smirk.
“Guilty,” she said.
You smiled back. Dean gestured at her boyfriend next, clad in a beige trench coat, slacks, and blazer.
“And Cas, who bravely suffers being my dad’s partner on the job.”
Cas nodded wryly at the introduction. His dark hair and blue eyes were striking, you could admit. His tie was loose and slightly rumpled. Along with the stubble coating his face, he was handsome, if a bit scruffy. It was hard for you to believe he’d earned the top scores his year in the Police Academy, but you supposed that looks could be deceiving.
“What’s that like?” you asked with a smirk. “From what I’ve heard about John Winchester, he sounds like he’s a bit of a hard-ass.”
Dean barked with a dry laugh. “An understatement.”
“He has a crab-like shell,” Cas agreed. “But he has a soft center where it counts, not unlike his sons.”
You turned to Dean with a more teasing smile. “Aww…”
He rolled his eyes, even though his arm, which had been draped across the back your chair, now dropped to curl around your waist.
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever, Columbo,” he remarked at his blue-eyed friend.
Always had to get the last dig in, it seemed, but you couldn’t help but laugh a little along with Meg at Cas’s expense.
“You guys all seem really close,” you said. It was nice for you to see.
Dean shrugged like it was no big deal. Or rather, like it was commonplace.
“Well, maybe family ain’t just about blood,” he said.
Meg rolled her eyes. “Ugh. What a friggin’ sap.”
“You love it,” Dean grinned. She smiled, begrudgingly.
Family ain’t just about blood.
You liked that sentiment as well. It seemed to be true here. 
Even Ellen Harvelle treated Dean like a son when she came over to greet your table. She kissed his cheek and gave Meg and Cas’s shoulders a squeeze. Even you got a warm hand on your shoulder when she introduced herself.
“Welcome, hun. I understand it’s not your first time here, but if you got any questions on the menu, you let me know,” she said.
Dean shot you a conspiratorial smile, and it got you wondering what he was about to do.
“I mean, I don’t know why you don’t put the order in for chili fries the second you see me come through the door,” he teased. “Come on, Ellen. How long’ve I been coming here? Since before I had a license?”
Ellen narrowed her eyes and flicked the side of Dean’s head, regardless of his flinching protest.
“Don’t you go sayin’ that so damn loud,” she reproached. “You never drank underage at my bar.”
His eyes averted with a smile, in a way that told you Ellen was a damn liar. You bit your lip to try and hide your smile.
“Anyway, I’ll get your damn fries—”
“And a beer,” Dean interjected. She rolled her eyes.
“And a beer. Four?” she pointed at the rest of you, and you, Cas, and Meg nodded in agreement.
“All right, four beers. Anything else, darlin’?” She looked at you with a mother’s charm.
You looked up from the menu and unconsciously smiled.
“Um, sure. Can I get the chicken sandwich?”
She patted your shoulder. “You sure can.”
Ellen then took the rest of their orders without writing a thing down. You were impressed by her memory. At the end though, Dean didn’t let her go without a hand on her arm.
“Thanks, Ellen,” he said with a more sincere smile.
“A-huh,” she replied, with all due sarcasm. But there was a fondness in her eyes that was hard to miss when she playfully grabbed the back of his neck. “Knucklehead.”
A giggle escaped you, and Ellen tossed you a wink before she went to put in the orders and get the drinks.
Conversation flowed easier when the alcohol came. One beer became two, and even three (four, for Meg). By then, you were sure it was one beer too many for yourself, but you didn’t want to be the odd one out. You were mostly listening to the three of them bounce back and forth between reminiscing with old stories and roasting one another mercilessly.
It was hilarious and entertaining, but you were trying not to get caught in the crosshairs of the volleying. Inevitably though, Meg’s attention turned to you with a certain sly smile.
“You must be real special,” she remarked, gesturing at Dean. “He usually doesn’t bring his girls around here, where he actually likes to hang out. Guess that’d mean he’d have to see ‘em again with the lights on.”
You blinked in surprise.
“Meg,” Dean’s voice cut like a warning.
Your eyes widened as you took in the change, his deeper voice, his more serious gaze, versus Meg’s nonchalance. Even Cas gave her a chiding look.
“Not sure I want to know what that means,” you tried to joke.
But you could guess. It was fairly obvious.
You glanced over at Dean, whose lips pursed. Before either of you could say anything more, Meg chimed in.
“Oooh, is this gonna be your first fight?” she teased.
Dean’s brows furrowed with a glare. “That’s enough.”
“And that’s our cue,” Cas nodded. He’d already slipped out his wallet as soon as his girlfriend started talking. He left a generous few bills to cover their half of the night, plus tip, and got up out of his seat. He claimed his coat and then encouraged Meg off her chair.
“What? I’m not done with my beer,” she protested.
“I think you are,” Cas said.
Meg scoffed, but she allowed his manhandling as he wrapped a supportive arm around her waist.
“You’re not the boss of me, Clarence,” she snipped.
“Certainly not,” he agreed. “But you’re a lightweight. Time to go home, before you insult the entire bar.”
“You’re no fucking fair,” she groused, hitting his chest over his jacket. Cas leveled you and Dean with a long-suffering look of apology.
Dean waved him off with a “no sweat it” look and a shake of his head. Meg annoyed the shit out of him sometimes, especially when she was drunk. He turned to you with a sigh.
“Again, sorry about that. I didn’t think I’d have to apologize for my friends more than once tonight,” he said.
You shook your head. “It’s...okay. Overall, they were really fun.”
Dean scoffed. “I don’t think Cas has been called fun even once in his life.”
You smiled in amusement, but Meg’s words still swirled around in your head like heady wine.
“Dean,” you began, but your attempt to broach the issue was cut off by his cell phone ringing. He gave you an apologetic look and fished in his pocket for his phone. His brows rose when he saw the caller ID.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I gotta take this,” he said. “I’ll be right back.”
“Oh, okay—” You’d barely nodded when Dean was up and out of his chair, heading out of the bar. You could still see him through one of the faded glass doors as he held the phone up to his ear.
It was late, and quieter now. A blonde server came to take your plates, and you actually remembered her.
“Oh, hi! Jo, right?” you asked. She hesitated when you spoke, but she bobbed her head.
“That’s me,” she said. “Can I get you anything else?”
“No, I’m good. Thanks,” you said with a smile. “I met your mom. She’s really nice.”
Jo uttered a wry laugh as she stacked the plates and silverware. You helped her collect the silverware and empty beer bottles.
“Yeah, when you get her good side,” she replied. 
You smirked at that, remembering how Ellen snapped back and forth with Dean. You had no doubt that woman could be a pistol if you pissed her off.
“Well, it's nice here,” you admitted, once again taking stock of the décor. The music, the warm lighting, the good food… “It’s cozy.”
Jo’s smile quirked to one side as she paused.
“Well, it’s been in my family for three generations of Harvelles,” she said. “This was my father’s favorite place in the world.”
You caught the note of melancholy in her words, in her eyes.
“Was?” you echoed. She met your gaze and nodded.
“He was a firefighter,” she said. “He died on the job.”
You dimmed considerably. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
Jo only nodded.
“How did he…” Your curiosity got the best of you, but you soon shook your head and backtracked. “Never mind, you don’t have to explain.”
“It was a fire that wasn’t properly vented,” Jo answered your half-spoken question. Her blue eyes were heavier. “He got caught in an updraft…but he actually worked at Firehouse 25. He was their brother. That’s why this’ll always be their place.”
You processed that with a slow nod of wonder.
“It’s good that you and your mom will always have that support,” you said eventually. “Even though…it might be hard too, to always be reminded.”
Jo’s lips quirked again. “It’s more the first one, but…sometimes the second one. A lot of these guys have known me since I had braces. It’s hard to shake that perpetual little sister thing.”
You smiled at that. “Yeah, I’d imagine that gets old real quick. A bunch of over-protective older brothers.”
“Overbearing, more like,” she scoffed. You laughed.
Unconsciously, you glanced over to the front of the bar, where you saw Dean still on the phone. You remembered the second date you were meant to have, when he was late due to a five-car pileup his team responded to.
You remembered that night he called you for the first time, after a long day he didn’t want to tell you about. He’d let you distract him instead. All the while, it had you wondering what he’d seen. What he’d responded to that day.
Had it been another car accident? A fire? What made someone as upbeat and funny and smooth as Dean seem to lose all the life in his voice?
Though while you were lost in your thoughts, Jo was watching you.
Jealousy roiled inside her, unbidden. She didn’t want to hate you, because unlike the girls Dean usually messed around with, you had some self-respect. Jo heard Meg’s snide clips at you earlier, and no one could fake the surprise in your eyes. Unless you were just that good a damn actor…
But no, she didn’t get that vibe from you.
It didn’t mean she had to like you though. 
“You’re right to think twice,” Jo said, earning your attention back with a swivel of your head. “What Meg said…she wasn’t wrong. Dean’s broken a few hearts, if you catch my drift.”
Just a few well-placed words, Jo thought. She realized then that she had the power to twist the wrench here, widening the gap between you and Dean. Feed your doubts.
She didn’t have to feel bad about it if it was the truth.
And yet…she saw the way your gaze fell. The disappointment setting in, the anxious clench of your hands on the table. You glanced over at Dean again out of the corner of your eye.
Jo realized then just what she was doing, not just to Dean, but to herself.
You’re not some petty bitch, she dully reminded herself.
“But,” she found herself adding. You raised your gaze back to her. Jo let out a subtle breath.
“It’s not always his fault,” she admitted. And maybe she was speaking a bit too much from experience. “The job demands a lot from him.”
Slowly, you nodded. You looked pensive, but not like you’d made up your mind.
Fine, Jo thought, as she collected the dishes and left your table.
She didn’t know if she wanted to sway you one way or the other on taking a chance on Dean Winchester.   
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While you were talking to Jo, Dean was taking his father’s unexpected call.
“Hey, Dad. What’s up?” he said.
“Hey, son. How are ya?” John’s voice was gruff and tired. Dean frowned to hear it.
“I’m good. I’m out right now, but did you need something?”
“Have you responded to any fires lately?”
“You mean like the Richardson fire?” Dean asked pointedly. “No, haven’t had one since. And no cattle prod brandings either.”
“All right, good. Just checking in.”
Good? Dean thought. John would be chomping at the bit for a new arson. If he was “just checking in,” then he was worried about something. Is he worried about me?
“What’s going on? Is there something I need to know?” Dean asked in suspicion. This was why he had taken the call. “Seriously, you can tell me. I’m not even gonna bitch at you like Sam does.”
John chuckled. But then he hesitated. Dean knew he’d hit on something.
“Dad?” he pressed.
John’s sigh was a heavy one. “Okay. What I’m about to tell you, you don’t fucking repeat. Not to anyone, you understand me? Not even your brother.”
Dean’s brows furrowed in trepidation. “Okay, fine. What the hell is it?”
“Richardson, the father of two?” John reminded. “He was a lawyer, linked to a money laundering scheme through a company called Stull Storage. It’s an old company, dates back to the seventies.”
“Okay…” 
As John continued to explain, the more confused Dean became… 
About 30 years ago, John Winchester had been a young, but promising officer in the Narcotics division. He’d married young, and by then was just barely clearing the five-year mark. Already he had the house he’d inherited from his wife’s parents, a four-year-old son, and a newborn.
Stull Storage’s units were used by a drug ring that John had been trying to infiltrate, undercover. Those units had stored cocaine, illegal weapons, and other flavors of contraband, mostly from South America (and back).
“We got close to breaking that case, once, but after the fire…I transferred out of Narcotics, as you know,” John said.
Dean knew the real story there. After his mom died, his father went into a spiral, trying to find whoever set that fire—even after the Fire Department found no evidence of arson. John had eventually been forced out of Narcotics. He requested Homicide.
As he’d told Dean once when he was extremely drunk: I seem to do better at my job when the bodies are already dead.
“Now I know that I was right about your mother’s death,” John said.
Dean released a shaky sigh. “Aw, man. Not this again, Dad. For Christ’s sake.”
“There was something wrong about that fire, Dean,” he said, raising his voice to be heard over Dean’s objections. “I just didn’t find the connection…until now.”
Dean muttered a curse under his breath. His gaze fell to the ground. Sam was usually the one who drew a hard line at hearing any more about their mom’s supposed murder, but now Dean had reached the end of his tether. It was too much.
He glanced back through the glass doors to make sure you were okay. He saw you talking to Jo, and he frowned at himself.
Here you were, waiting on him back in the bar, and his dad was calling him in the middle of the night, chasing ghosts again.
“Look…it’s been my whole damn life with this.” Dean held the phone to his ear with one hand, and rubbed at his forehead with the other. “I just can’t do this with you anymore.”    
“Dean, listen,” John urged. “You wanna know what I’m digging into, this is it. I got Mary’s file unsealed.”
Dean’s eyes widened. “What? Thought you couldn’t do that without new evidence and a court order.”
“Well, I’ve got the evidence…maybe I was a bit impatient with the court order.”
Dean rolled his eyes. His father liked to play a little fast and loose with the rules.
“At the time, the medical examiner dismissed it. She’d been burned…” John paused on a deeper breath. “But I saw it. Mary had a burn on her wrist. It was the same brand found on Richardson. On Jerry Stillwell, CPA. Amanda Waller, journalist. It’s all connected, Dean. How they’re connected to one another, I’m not sure yet. We’re still digging…but I do know this. Richardson was a message.”
Dean’s back hit the wall of the Roadhouse. His brows furrowed as he struggled to digest everything John was saying.
“A message?” he asked. “To who?”
“To me, I think. Those kids, and their mother…you got ‘em out alive, but they weren’t meant to,” John said, his voice sounding heavy. "The wife told me her husband was erratic when he got home, holding his wrist. He'd been burned before the fire. He wouldn't say what happened...then they smelled the goddamn smoke."
"Shit," Dean replied. He leaned heavily against the wall, pressing a hand to his forehead. There was an ache starting between his eyes.
“Yeah," John agreed. "The drug ring I was investigating, when I was in Narcotics. I was getting close. And I mean close. I was about to get the Big Kahuna. The kingpin of the whole operation…and then the house fire.”
Fuck. Dean wiped at his mouth anxiously as he realized what John was saying. Fuck.
“He burned me, Dean. He must have,” John said. Meaning, the drug lord he was trying to pin down somehow discovered his identity. “Your mom paid the price of that.”
“Who is this guy?” Dean asked. His hand holding the phone was starting to tremble.
“I still don’t know his real name. Workin’ on that one too,” John said. “But they called him Azazel.”
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When Dean eventually hung up with his father and returned to you at the bar, he saw you brighten. But you soon dimmed with a tinge of worry. Something of his thoughts must’ve shown on his face.
Shit. He tried his best to school his features.
“Hey, sorry about that,” he said, grasping your shoulder. “I’ll take you home.”
“I met you here, remember?” you asked.
Dean paused, then shook his head. Get it together, asshole.
“Right," he said. "Well, I’ll walk you to your car. Let me just pay real quick.”
After he sorted out the bill (he didn’t know that you’d slipped in an extra $30 in Cas’s stack for your part), he led you out, saying goodbye to Ellen and Jo while you went.
You hesitated when the two of you got to the car. Something wasn’t right with him. And both Jo and Meg’s words still rolled back and forth through your head.
“Dean, are you okay? Who was it on the phone?” you asked.
“I’m fine. It was just my dad, called to have me take a look at his car. We were just arguing about our schedules…I’m sure you can relate,” he replied, trying at a smile.
You weren’t sure if you believed him. Though he was nearly convincing, he was also shifting on his feet, hands in his pockets. His gaze roamed away from yours, above your head and over your shoulder.
“Um, I might’ve had a beer too many,” you said with a half-chuckle. “Could you walk with me for a bit? Just until my head clears enough to drive.”
“I could take you home,” Dean offered.
“And leave my car here?” you asked. In a public parking lot behind a bar?
You shook your head and pointed down the road.
“Just there and back…but if you need to go, I guess I could just sit in my car for a while.”
Dean shook his head with a frown. He couldn’t tell you that a damn serial killer was on the loose.
“No, it’s okay,” he said. “It’s a relatively safe neighborhood, but not so much at night. Not by yourself.”
He laid a hand on your back to start walking with you, but his hand soon fell back to his side. You glanced at him, but he looked straight ahead, unusually quiet and reserved.
It felt like he was checking out of this night with you. Like he just wanted to usher you into the car and leave. Did he just not want to deal with what Meg said?
“You must be real special,” she remarked, gesturing at Dean. “He usually doesn’t bring his girls around here, where he actually likes to hang out. Guess that’d mean he’d have to see ‘em again with the lights on.”
Letting out a breath, you tried to see if you could broach the subject.
“It was nice to meet some more of your friends,” you said, and with a nervous laugh, “even if it did get awkward there at the end.”
Dean finally looked over at you.
“We never exactly talked about what each of us was looking for,” you said. “What we were really doing here.” 
You stood your ground, but you tried not to look censuring. Just open to whatever he might have to say. Even so, unease churned inside you.
Dean sighed and raked a hand through his hair. “Look, she wasn’t exactly wrong about me.”
You considered that with a nod, biting the inside of your lip.
“When was the last time you were in a relationship?” you asked. Dean gave a humorless huff of a laugh. This really was the last thing he wanted to get into tonight, but he had a feeling he had no choice.
“A few months ago, for about a minute,” he said. “But uh, before then…never.”
Together, you began to cross the street while the cars on either side waited at the red light. Pedestrians had the right of way for the next 30 seconds. You looked over at him and steeled yourself.
“Dean, is this is something casual for you?”
“Define casual,” he attempted to joke (or to deflect). Though the bravado fell the moment he saw that look on your face: tight and disappointed…and hurt.  
He reached for your hand, but you weren’t having it. You slipped away from him and continued walking at a more brusque clip, even in those platform heels.  
“Okay, hold on.” He quickly followed after you and tugged you back by the hand. It had you both stopping in the middle of the crosswalk.  
Dean squeezed your hand and peered into your eyes.
“Look, I’m sorry. Don’t close up on me,” he implored. “…Please.”
Despite your better judgment, and your pursed lips, you waited. Something told you this man didn’t often say please.
“The truth is, I’m trying to do something different here with you. I don’t think we would’ve made it to date #4 if we were just casual,” he said. “I’m not playing games either.”
You wanted to trust that he was serious. Once again, your mind and your heart were at odds; the former told you to be wary, while the latter told you to trust the earnestness in his eyes.
Your heart won. “Okay, Dean.”
“Yeah?” he asked, with hopeful brows raised.
“Yeah,” you nodded.
You finally smiled. And you leaned up, resting a hand against his chest, and pressed a kiss to his cheek. His stubble was coarse, but familiar against your lips.
Dean turned his head and leaned in for a proper kiss. His hands found the curve of your waist and brought you closer against his chest. You both sunk deeper into it, your lips gliding as your head tilted into the kiss…
Until a horn honked loudly, making you both jolt at the sound.
The streetlight was green, and several cars were waiting for you to cross. You snorted in amusement, leading Dean to grin down at you. He tugged you back into step with him across the street.
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Again, you hesitated at your car. Dean was more himself as he’d held your hand all the way back.
He now held your car door open while you threw in your purse. But when you turned back to him, you still saw something brooding behind his eyes.
You drew near and grasped the open edges of his shirt. This man wore a lot of plaid when he was out of uniform, always with an undershirt. Tonight it was green plaid on gray, complete with some faded jeans and a pair of boots. This was the only “casual” way in which you wanted Dean.  
“Hey,” you started.
“Hmm?” he replied, holding you by your arms.
“I get that we haven’t known each other all that long. So you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” you said. “But did something happen when you stepped out? When you talked to your dad?”
Dean paused. His eyes, a pale green under the streetlamp, flicked to yours.
“I just want to know that you’re okay,” you said. “And if you’re not, that’s okay too.”
After a moment to blink in surprise, your earnestness got to him. His grip moved down your arms, and he took one of your hands. His dad’s warning echoed through his mind.
What I’m about to tell you, you don’t fucking repeat. Not to anyone, you understand me? Not even your brother.
Dean knew his dad didn’t make demands without a reason, even if he wasn’t typically so forthcoming with them. But Dean drew enough courage to be as honest as he could be. You deserved that much, after everything you'd put up with tonight.
“My mom died...when I was about four,” he said. “It was a house fire.”
Your eyes widened. All this time, you’d assumed his mother had passed away. You hadn’t expected that, though. You squeezed his hands.
“I’m so sorry,” you said, and you meant it. Dean just shook his head.
“It was ruled an accident. Really they just didn’t have much evidence either way,” he continued. “But uh, my dad’s been obsessed with the idea that it wasn’t. That someone started the fire on purpose… Well, today, he might’ve found his proof.”
He held your gaze for as long as he could, but in the end, he just couldn’t. His chest was tight. Saying those words out loud made them real, and he wasn’t sure of how to handle it.  
“Oh, Dean,” you said, starting and stopping, as you struggled to formulate a response that wasn’t just “I’m sorry,” or “Are you okay?” 
He clearly wasn’t. You also didn’t want to give him platitudes like, “That’s crazy,” or the ever-inspired: “Wow.” 
Or some other variation of what you’re supposed to say. You wanted to give him something honest. Something real. 
So you curled your hands around his arms, earning his gaze.
“You must be reeling right now,” you said. “Do you think he’s onto something this time?”  
“I don’t know what to think,” said Dean. “I’ve been pressing him for answers, but…honestly? I wish he hadn’t told me a damn thing.” 
You didn’t know what to say to that. You were surprised that he actually confided in you with this. But the only thing you could think to do was lean up on your toes and slip your arms around his neck. You hugged him, warm and tight. 
You couldn’t even imagine what he was feeling, but you just wanted him to know that someone was there for him. You were there for him. 
Dean eventually hugged you back. He held you, reassuring you as well as himself. He blew out a cathartic breath, and his hand came up to cup the back of your head. His lips tugged upwards.
“You’re a sweetheart, you know that?” he said. 
A smile spread across your face. Your fingers soothed through his hair gently. You pressed your lips into his neck.
“I aim to please,” you said against his skin.
Dean smiled more fully at that. The new warmth in his chest warred against the roiling in his stomach. Despite his best efforts, his smile faded.
His mom’s killer was still out there.
The thought was haunting his mind, and he knew it probably would for many nights to come.
So for now, he’d just hold you a bit tighter.
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AN: 🥲 I honestly didn't mean it to end so angsty, but Dean finally got some much-needed hurt/comfort there! What did you think of how Jo handled her jealous side? And Gordon "shooting his shot" lol.
Coming soon in Part 7, we finally get to a huge milestone between these two lovebirds, with a side helping of baking shenanigans. 😏❤️‍🔥
Next Time:
“Ey, ey!” he raised a warning finger with his free hand. “You’re about to take this to a new level.”
You met his gaze through your lashes with a playful smile. “So?”
Dean raised a brow at you. He could admit, you had audacity. All he could do was call your bluff.
He took one of your battered fingers into his mouth. Your eyes widened at the feel of his soft tongue swirling around your finger, sucking it clean. All the while, his eyes never broke from yours.
Lord have mercy, you thought. Really, it was the only coherent one in your head.
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Dean Winchester Masterlist
Main Masterlist
Series Tag List (Part 1):
@hobby27 @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007 @wincastifer @iamsapphine @simpforbuckyb
@vanillawhiskeyflavoredkisses @roseblue373 @this-is-me19 @emily-winchester @spnexploration @deans-spinster-witch @deans-baby-momma @iprobablyshipit91
@melancholictearz @nic-kolas @katherineann814 @sleepyqueerenergy @wayward-lost-and-never-found @thewritersaddictions @just-levyy @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @deanwanddamons @antisocialcorrupt @lacilou @adoringanakin @theonlymaninthesky @teehxk @midnightmadwoman @brianochka @branj19
@agalliasi @venicesem @chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78 @solariklees @xsophianicolex @deansbbyx @candy-coated-misery0731 @curlycarley @sarahgracej @bagpussjocken @ultrahviolentart @chernayawidow @beskarfilms @mimaria420
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littlefreya · 4 years ago
Text
As I was saying
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Summary: You recently found out that you’re pregnant and Henry is being all sorts of over-protective and annoying about it and won’t shut up about what you should or shouldn’t eat. So you find a creative way to shut him up...
Pairing: Henry Cavill x Reader (no description of body type or ethnicity thought it’s mention that Henry is taller)
Word count: 1.8k
Warnings: 18+, RPF, fluff to smut, early pregnancy, blow job, bodily fluids, slight FemDom/SubMale, My overuse of poetic sex metaphors, cottagecore!
*No permission is given for reposting my work, copying it, or parts from it.
A/N: This story was born out of a convo I had with my sweet @the-soot-sprite​ about the photo above. Many thanks to @agniavateira​ my solid rock who betas all my work and to @firefly-graphics​ for the dividers
Please comment and reblog if you enjoyed my story. I work hard on each one of them and your validation means the world to me. 🖤
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As I was Saying
Henry’s velvety voice carried through the cottage like seductive vapours of honey liqueur. It wasn’t often that he'd sing a blissful tune so casually out of the blue—after earth-shattering sex perhaps, which indeed you had the night before. However, this morning, his chants were laced with a new flavour of sugary bliss. 
Two little pink stripes. That's all it took for his eyes to shimmer the way precious cobalt is kissed by a moonlight glow.
Sneaking about in the mien of a curious little mouse, you trod after the pleasant tune of his voice, which was now accompanied by a soft rustle. Wander laved your face once you leaned against the kitchen door frame, peering at the prodigious man who stood in front of the open fridge. 
Preoccupied, he appeared to be ransacking through the shelves with the song ‘Cheek to Cheek’ thrumming on his tongue.
“Heaven... I'm in heaven…”  
Fingers clutching at the edge of the wall, you pressed into the chilled surface with a relaxed smirk, lingering on the irresistible view when your ease of mind faded with a blink of an eye — while methodically rummaging through the fridge, Henry threw fresh food straight into an open trash can.
“What are you doing?” you asked, your voice rising to a high-pitched yip. 
Henry made a soft flex; the muscles of his back rippled in a tidal motion. Though acknowledging your presence, he proceeded to hover a finger over different products. 
“Cleaning up the fridge," he answered absentmindedly.
With a soft shove, there went your French cheese. 
“That’s brand new!” you protested and rushed toward him, alarmed. 
Towering over the trash can, you considered diving in to salvage the precious bulk of cheese from the dreary pit. Henry glanced at you from the corner of his eyes, testing your resolve while his claw grabbed some papaya salad leftovers and pushed it over the edge of the shelf, joining the rest of the discarded meals. 
“It is,” he nodded and closed the refrigerator door, carrying on to the high cabinets. With a slight wrinkle between his brows and a hand scratching the stubbles of his dimpled chin, he narrowed his eyes to scrutinise the items carefully. “I'm pregnant-proofing the kitchen. I called Hanna while you were asleep. She created a proper daily menu for you with the dos and don’ts: less sugar, more veggies and protein.” 
It took you a moment to process his words, your eyes narrowing while asking, “Hanna? As in Hanna, your nutritionist?”
Henry nodded at your question, a faint crease lining his cheek. “That’s the one. Don't worry, princess, she specialises with pregnant women.”
Unwittingly, a somewhat inhuman growl sounded in your chest. You were only getting used to the idea of developing another person inside you, and here stood your husband, already seeing fit to dictate your diet. Slithering into the narrow space between the heavy man and the counter, you tilted your chin to meet his stare while your fists pressed into your hips assertively. 
“Listen here, Cavill! You might have jizzed me one too many and succeeded in putting a baby in there, but this is still my body. I can take care of my own pregnancy diet.”
With an arm stretched above your head, Henry offered a charming display of pearly whites to pacify your strained nerves. His dimples nearly managed to beguile your senses when your eyes flared at the sight of what was held between his long fingers.
“No! Henry, no! Not the coffee!”
“Oh, I’m afraid so, my love. You shouldn’t have any caffeine at your current state.” Despite his argument, the tenderness of his gaze stroked upon your face like a warm ray of sunlight piercing through heavy clouds. Lazily it dropped to your belly, the cascading heat cradling your unborn child. 
Words of protest left you for a sliver of a moment, too in awe of the dreamy grin on his face. 
Thoughts of how beautiful you’d look rounded and full with his child illuminated him that you swore his skin developed a glow over the night. Didn’t they always say women are radiant when they are pregnant? Well, it seemed that in your case, it applied to your husband as well.
The charming haze of bliss almost swallowed you up; but you quickly slapped yourself back into reality, reaching a hand in an attempt to stop Henry from throwing away your delicacy. Though taller, Henry held his hand far out of reach, a hint of a smugness stretching his lips.
“A pregnant woman is allowed to have a little bit of caffeine!” You muttered and sent both hands in an attempt to retrieve the box while Henry teased you by throwing it from one hand to the other, further fueling your annoyance. 
Vexed to the point of frustration, you stood still and sighed, “you know what else is bad for the baby?” 
Henry paused his foolish games and tilted his head as he waited to hear your answer.
“His father at the morgue after I’ll kill him. Now stop that and hand it over! A pregnant woman can have a cup a day, according to Google.” 
“Nope,” Henry clicked his tongue, his laughter replaced with a severe stare. “Love, I know they say it’s okay to have a teeny bit, but I’ve been doing some research while you were asleep, and it’s not recommended. Caffeine increases heart rate and blood pressure, which is not good for you nor for the baby. It also increases urination, which may cause dehydration.”
Clenching your jaw at the onslaught of information he bestowed, you watched his lips move while none of his words registered. Preoccupied with the rules of a “healthy” pregnancy, Henry was set on being the practical one, completely forgetting to enjoy the moment. And damn, it was the moment to celebrate. All you wanted right now was to stay in bed for a day, ride your handsome husband to hell and back and eat as much ice cream as possible.
“Everything you eat from now on goes to our baby,” Henry proceeded to lecture on a thing you were perfectly aware of.
Ire found you within seconds, embroiled with pregnancy hormones which made him further intolerable at the moment— intolerable
... and delicious.  
Soaked with hunger, your eyes raked his sight: the thickness of his muscles was apparent beneath a plain black t-shirt and those good old grey sweats outlined the source of your current predicament. Your fingers twitched just from thinking about it, mimicking the sensation of squeezing its girth and eliciting those low groans that made your heart flutter. 
But his chatter still interrupted your sultry thoughts. If only there was a way to get him to shut up, you mused. Then your eyes focused on the soft bulge that winked back at your hungry glare.
Unaware, Henry turned toward the table to grab a bulk of informative documents he printed earlier in order to educate you of your pregnancy, he licked his thumb and began to read through, “As I was saying….”
Hastily, you exploited his lack of attention and took a step forward, your fingers latching around the hem of his sweats. With one swift movement, you fell to your knees and tugged his trousers along. 
Lost in his passionate speech, Henry was still muttering nonsense when your hand seized him; but as the lushness of your tongue bedded his soft cock without warning, all that could be heard in the kitchen was a husky gasp. 
Feeling the warm silky flesh swell and harden within your mouth, you sent your eyes up to peer at him, admiring the sight. Nothing spoke of your power better than the wrinkle between his shut eyes and his mouth agape with all air draining from his lungs. There you were, lowered to your knees with a maw full of his cock and yet, he was the one who lost his ability to speak and had his legs quaking of need. 
Unable to help yourself, you sent one palm to feel the tremor that ran through the muscles of his thighs while the other cradled his heavy sac. 
“Uh……” he finally managed to utter, a groan of bemused bliss pushing itself between his parted lips. “What��� what are you doing?” 
You crooked an eyebrow in response and answered by dragging your mouth along the length of his shaft. Your pillowy lips ran across ridges and thrumming veins, your jaw loosening until you felt him deep in the back of your throat. 
Locked in the cavernous cage of your maw, he tightened his gut and shuddered with pleasure. Though, the low unbridled groans that sputtered from his chest fueled your enticement just as so; memories of how the same thick girth that brimmed your mouth would split open your narrow canal made both your eyes and abandoned cunt tear of desperation.
It always beguiled you how much arousal could be found in bringing him to his rapture without touching yourself. The harder he throbbed on your velvety serpent, the more you soaked.  
With fervent strokes, you feasted on the briny flavour of his cock; the tendons vibrated with bliss while your tongue twirled and pushed around them. You pulled, sucked, and pumped him in your warm mouth, milking the senses of a man infinitely stronger—a man who succeeded in conquering your womb yet now crumbled to nothing at the touch of your tongue.
“Fuck…. Babe… keep going,” Henry breathed out a plea. The documents held by his hand slipped between his fingers as he pressed his palm to the cabinet with a thud, and began to rock his hips back and forth to fuck back into your mouth. Like feathers, the white slips floated around you, landing onto the ground while you worked him to his ecstasy.  
His other hand found your head, caressing lovingly and trying to take control: yet his strength waned and his head fell back with a moan. Faster, harder, you sucked your husband to the point of submission while hums of admiration laced around his rigid length. Your eyes beamed as you watched his resolve shatter. Your fingertips toyed with the coarse hair at the apex of his thighs, your thumb seeking the tendon at the base of his cock and pressing into it, urging him to spill his gift down your throat.
“I’m going to… I’m going to…. In your throat… fuck.”
With a guttural grunt, he thickened against your tongue; the overflow of salty-sweet cream glazed your mouth and then flowed down your flaring throat.
The room thrummed with the buzz of the refrigerator, Henry’s heavy exhales - these were the sounds of your triumph. Wiping your lips with the back of your hand, you cracked a smile and neatly pulled his trousers back on before you rose to stand straight. 
Overwhelmed and drenched in sweat, your husband scrutinised you while you reached for the box of capsules and tilted your head.
“You were saying?”
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lananiscorner · 2 years ago
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The Sandman rewatch - episode 9
So I like to do this thing where, if I didn’t consider a show a complete waste of time and if it does have an actual arc spanning the season, I watch the season twice–once as a binge watch and then once more episode by episode, because it helps me notice things I didn’t notice at first, especially in cases like this where I’m almost entirely unfamiliar with the source material.
Anyway, any and all chronological thoughts and ramblings about episode 9 of The Sandman beneath the cut, because spoilers.
“I don’t know how she did it, but I think Rose just got Lyta pregnant.” That’s a good way to start a convo, Matthew lol.
I love Lucienne’s malicious compliance with her “new” old role. And Matthew is so offended on her behalf. XD
Okay, so we can expand the list of “people the Corinthian is good with and let’s live” from “like-minded serial killers and gays” to “like-minded serial killers, gays and kids” lol.
This “cereal convention” is honestly the best fictional idea ever. Like, it crosses more lines than a bunch of hopscotching kids. Also, as an avid pun lover myself, I appreciate all the murder puns when Jed and the Corinthian arrive at the convention.
The Good Doctor looking at a fellow criminal chatting up Jed: “You may want to advise him to stay clear of the convention areas” lol.
“Where we’re going, we won’t need to defend ourselves” says Rose heading towards a convention of serial killers XDDDD.
Okay… so Lyta’s pregnancy advanced a couple of months in her dreams…
Hector: “Does this look like a nightmare to you?” Lyta: “Not at all.” Giant cracks in the ground: *looming ominously*
Omg, Dream is so fish-out-of-water asking Lucienne for advice/help lol.
Omg, Unity is so sweet it’s heartbreaking. “I’m going to have a life after all.” You’re killing me here, Unity.
Awww, Rose is worried she and her brother may have changed too much to get along. Understandable. That cut to Jed eating chicken fingers in his bathrobe is gold though.
And of course Jed goes looking for trouble the second he’s unsupervised. This is why I will never have kids.
Alright so, taking Hector out of the dreaming after giving him a chance to say goodbye? Fair. Immediately aftwards telling Lyta that you’ll take away her baby eventually? Kind of a dick move, Dream.
Not gonna lie, Rose this-dream-is-over-ing Dream was kind of badass.
Damn, Rose just casually swiping those tags…
I just LOVE this entire montage of Gilbert checking in on those convention panels. You can see he’s mildly confused in the first one (“Make it pay”, which, if you don’t yet know that they are serial killers, sounds like it could be about animal hunting), somewhat perplexed in the second one (“Woman’s Work”, which sounds mostly innocuous until the mention of “brute force” in the end), and then finally the shoe drops in the last one (“Religion”) and he just has a massive “oh crap” moment.
Oh my god, Philip Sitz has to be THE worst ultra-fan ever. Seriously? Promoting your own blog with your own photo and your own RL name on it when you’re trying to infiltrate a serial killer convention? He couldn’t be more set up to get killed if he was called Leeroy Jenkins and wearing a red shirt.
Also, Gilbert’s look of absolute horror when he sees the Corinthian makes sense when you know that Gilbert is also part of the Dreaming.
Awww, Dream admitting to Lucienne that he was wrong… these two melt my heart. In a strictly platonic way, but still, melting.
So Gilbert left because he wanted to experience life in the human world. Can’t blame him, honestly.
Of course Jed walks in on the Corinthian just as he’s about to kill Philip… and runs straight into Fun Land. Talk about the fish jumping from the frying pan into the fire.
Poor Gilbert learning about Rose being a vortex and that he’s now made it easier for Dream to find and kill her.
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alicanta77 · 4 years ago
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NCT Dream Reaction: Dating Jaehyun’s younger sister
Mark:
ok this is probably his worst nightmare
like 7 billion people on this planet
7 BILLION
and mark somehow managed to fall for his bandmates sister
he 10000% did the biggest face palm in history when he realised he had feelings for you
takes him about a year to feel even slightly relaxed in a room with both you and jaehyun in at the same time
he just feels like he broke the bro code
even though jaehyun has said to him multiple times it’s okay
he can’t relax around him for a while
eventually tho he gets over himself with a LOT of convincing from you and jae
and things become much less tense
and it probably ends up with a really nice dynamic
it’s essentially the Ross, Chandler and Monica dynamic from Friends
when mark hadn’t seen you in a while cause of work, jae would be the one to invite you over
jae would be the one to help convince management to let you visit them on tour
and he would often offer to go out on your dates so that people didn’t question it if you were spotted
he essentially does everything he can to help your relationship cause he loves the both of you
Renjun:
would really love it if you didn’t tell him
like ever
but unfortunately you have at some point
so you drag a whiny renjun to the 127 dorms to tell him
jaehyun probably only annoyed that it took you so long to tell him
he wants to know what’s going on in your life so that he can support you
however happy jae seems to be for the two you
renjun still thinks that jaehyun is orchestrating his death for the next four months
‘why do you think he wants you dead???’
‘because i’ve corrupted his baby sister!!!! everyone knows he’s protective of you!!!! why wouldn’t he want me dead???’
‘because he can see i’m happy???’
this is basically how your conversation goes everytime
until hyuck causally drops into convo that jae was talking to the guys about how much he loves that you’re dating renjun
and renjun feels like he just got a blessing from god
feels the need to see you immediately
‘HE DOESN’T HATE ME!!!’
‘thank god you realised! if only someone had been telling you that for the past few months!’
yeah he just shuts up you sarcasm with a massive kiss
not that you’re complaining
Jeno:
goes straight to doyoung for advice on how to tell jaehyun
doesn’t appreciate doyoung laughing at him because jaehyun’s going to kill him for dating his baby sister
when doyoung realises it isn’t a joke he probably freaks out
‘YOU’RE AN IDIOT OH YOU ARE SO DEAD!!! YOU’RE DATING JAEHYUN’S SISTER?’
‘huh?’ *jaehyun walking into doyoung’s room*
both jeno and doyoung just sit there staring at him
‘jeno, are you dating my baby sister?’ 
jaehyun’s eyes start narrowing as jeno’s are widening in fear
‘possibly’ *voice crack*
‘oh thank god it’s you, i thought it was doyoung for a second and i would have hated that!’
jaehyun’s laughing and ruffles jeno’s hair while jeno tries to catch his breath as his soul returns to his body
the boy’s just realised he’s not going to be murdered
‘you- you really don’t mind?’
‘no i always thought the two of you would end up together, i’m just glad you figured it out quickly’
after this jaehyun can’t help but see how much jeno’s smiles around you
and how you always seem to be in a good mood around him
and he decides that he doesn’t want see the either of you any other way
Donghyuck:
as teasing as donghyuck is
i think it would take him a while to become teasing about this with jaehyun
he just cares about you so much and doesn’t want to lose you
so he refuses to do anything that may give jaehyun a reason to take you away from him
literally goes to the length of acting as jaehyun’s personal slave for a week until jae feels too bad to let it continue
‘haechan, i’m not going to make her leave you. you don’t have to do this’
hyuck relaxes a bit after that
but i think he would be one to avoid talking about your relationship as much as possible
jaehyun probably has to find everything out from johnny
he probably pretends to switch rooms with johnny for a night just to mess with hyuck
after that it becomes a slight war
that poor you becomes stuck in the middle of
you act as a mediator for their arguments too
every so often hyuck forgets you’re jaehyun’s sister and makes a joke or something
‘sorry boys, gotta spend some time with the old ball and chain’ *wink*
‘WHAT?!?!’
‘no wait i was joking please don’t take her away from me i love her so much’ *on his knees*
jae would definitely abuse enjoy this new found power over hyuck
Jaemin:
im pretty sure jaehyun is jaemin’s favourite hyung
they have a v cute dynamic and have mentioned that they were close in trainee days
so i think jaemin would be absolutely terrified for jaehyun to find out
like properly terrified
like, when he does find out jaemin just accepts that the relationship is over, terrified
so you have to calm him down and talk to your brother and bf separately
jaemin would probably also do some nice things for jaehyun leading up to when you’re planning to tell him
such as buying him food and stuff
poor jaemin’s really bricking it
but after jaemin realises that jaehyun isn’t going to kill him and you aren’t going to leave him
he relaxes into the ultimate bf material that we all know he is
isn’t shy about showing his affection for you around jae
but always makes sure to keep it respectful
jaemin easily proves to jaehyun how much he loves you
and it takes jaehyun very little time to become so damn supportive of your relationship
it’s probably jaehyun who argues with management about letting the two of you go out in secret
so now you’ve got both your brother and boyfriend who are willing to do literally anything for you
Chenle:
jaehyun has said multiple times that chenle is his favourite younger brother
so i feel like out of all the dreamies jaehyun is probably most relaxed about chenle dating you
the one thing that does send jaehyun through the roof however
is that chenle doesn’t live in the dorms
he is at his own apartment
alone
with you
and little supervision
his older brother senses are tingling
expect phone calls from him so that he can check you two are being appropriate
and god forbid you miss a call from him
‘WHY DIDN’T YOU PICK UP???’
‘YOU HAD JUST HUNG UP FIVE MINUTES AGO!!! YOU DON’T CALL ME THIS MUCH WHEN YOU’RE IN A DIFFERENT CONTINENT ON TOUR!!!’
you end up shutting your phone off and telling him off when you get back
other than that it’s probably surprisingly chill
like even the others members are impressed with how little of a deal it is
chenle and jae don’t deliberately avoid or talk about it when they’re together, they just continue as normal
overall a nice, low pressure, casual environment
and you best believe jae is your number one shipper
Jisung:
is probably too nervous to tell jaehyun himself
makes you do it by yourself even though you wanted to tell him together
but sung hits you with the pout and big eyes while he begs you
and of course you caves because who wouldn’t
but the first time he saw jae after he found out about the two of you, jisung was contemplating moving countries
HE DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY
HE DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO
HE DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO ACT
he just panicked went the most formal he had ever been in his life
bowed so low so quickly he thinks he cracked his back
spoke with every formality in the book
jaehyun was watching him in so much confusion
‘sung, you know i’m okay with you dating my sister right?’
‘HUH????’
‘yeah didn’t she tell you? i’ve been rooting for you guys for like two years now’
sung looks to the side
just to see you watching him laughing to yourself
‘why would you do that to meeee?’
‘make me tell him by myself and i’m gonna get payback somehow’
huffs and pouts into the night so you make sure to give him extra lil kisses to make up for it
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toomanyfandoms02 · 4 years ago
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The Journal // George Weasley x Reader
I LOVED THIS REQUEST FROM @rainy-day-gracie OMGGGG it was SO fun to write.
Don't forget that request are open and dialogue prompts are on my page!
Summary - Reader loses her diary and has to go on a search for it.
Word Count - 1.75k
Prompts - "When did you take that!" ~~ "I hid it."
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Where was it?
WHERE WAS IT?
Now, I didn't like to refer to my personal notes as a diary, I prefer journal. But the point is, it was missing.
Missing from the small compartment under my bed where I had hid it. Not that I expected anyone to take it, but it calmed my anxiety so I did what I could.
The journal looked just like my sketch book, I did this on purpose so that people wouldn't question why I had it out and was writing in it on occasion. They would just think I'm sketching per usual. But I made sure to keep good track of it, because I truly *did* have very personal information in there, like any journal would. So at this point, I'm frantically running around asking my dorm mates if they had seen it. First asking Hermione and Parvarti because they knew of the book. Then asking Ginny Weasley and Sophie Roper.
They had all claimed to have not seen it.
So I rushed down to the common room. Checking the side tables, under the couch, on the fireplace mantle. But it was useless, I *know* I closed it in the compartment 2 days ago. I remember it distinctly because I had written a rather private thing in it that day, and I wanted to stop thinking about how it made me feel.
*Potions, one of my least favorite classes for a few reasons. (Maybe because we had it with the snooty Slytherins or maybe because Severus Snape taught the wretched class, who's to say.) But there was one thing that made the class shine for me despite the things I hated about it.*
*George Weasley.*
*Somehow we had managed to be partners for this potion by random. Much to Snapes disliking. But he had to let it go since the picking was truly random.*
*"Today we will be making the Babbling Beverage, does anyone know what this potion does?" Snape asked in his usual monotone voice. A slytherins hand shot up from the back, explaining that it makes you speak uncontrollable nonsense. George leaned across the table to me.*
*"Guess it wouldn't change much for you then, huh?" He laughed, leaning back into his seat with a shit-eating grin.*
*And that's what sparked me to write in my journal. I felt I had to do it immediately, so I did. I whipped it from my bag and held it in my left hand, not laying it on the table where he could see.*
*"What are you writing?" He asked, trying to peak at it.*
*"I'm drawing you Bimbo!" I laughed but that's not even close to what I was doing.*
**I really thought this was only the stuff you could read about, this feeling. A laugh has never brought louder music to my ears, and that smile, I feel like I've never seen him smile like that. He never fails to bring a shining moment to my day. I hope that I make him feel this way sometimes. The tightness in my chest, the way my heart feels like it's having palpitations because its beating so damn fast. Or the way I think he's just so perfect. I sound like such a teenager gosh.**
*I never used names in the thing just in case someone ever got a hold of it.*
*"Why don't you ever let me see your drawings?" He pouted, grabbing at the book and nearly having a hold of it. I snatched it from him quickly.*
*"Because I'm still learning and I don't like them very much." I lied, holding the book to my chest.*
*"I bet they look fine." He muttered with another pout before going to grab ingredients.*
After I decided there was no use in panicking, I took some deep breaths. I had to get to Potions soon, I could talk to George about this and vent to him about the stress I was under at the moment. I grabbed my Potions book from my side table and headed that way.
To keep me distracted by what I felt like were prying eyes in the corridors, (which no one was probably looking at me, that's paranoia for you) I flipped through my sketch book. I flipped through it all the way to the potions door. But one step in and I had nearly dropped it.
George sat, tipping his chair back with what I was positive was *my* journal. He looked deep in thought, his right index finger dragging down one of the pages to read it. I recovered my sketches and stomped over to him, alerting him of my presence. He stood from the seat, holding the book from my reach.
"When did you take that?!" I tried to express my concern quietly so no one would but in on the convo, my arms crossed over my chest.
"Technically I didn't take it." He replied in a cocky manner. "Sophie got it for me."
"But I hid it! That damn girl, I knew she was being suspicious. Give it back, now Weasley, I'm not playing." I held my hand out for it.
"Not until you tell me who you fancy." My face paled, he had read some of it that little snot. That made me quite scared, I did not want him knowing that.
"George it's just ramblings that I come up with, like short stories."
"These sound pretty realistic to me." For a second there his face seemed hurt, but I will have to look over it considering the situation I'm in currently. He brought it to his eye level, still to where I couldn't reach it, and flipped through pages to find one where I write something lovey. "How about, 'He made me laugh so hard I nearly choked today, how does he do it? Do girls seriously not see the charm in this man? I sure do.'" He flipped more, reaching a sufficient page clearly.
"Or, or this one. 'I like him so much I want to be part of his family. Have you ever liked someone so much you *want* to meet their family. I want to be a Weasley-'"
You've got to be kidding. You've **got** to be kidding.
I must have gotten so caught up with writing it that I just let a name slip. Why would I do that. My hand was clasped over my mouth firmly and George was still holding it eye level, seeming to read it silently. I sat in my seat and put my head on the table so I didn't have to watch anymore.
I figured this would happen this way, it wouldn't be me directly telling him. But I thought I would cry, because the thought if it happening made me cry. But I was actually just scared and embarrassed. Scared of rejection and embarrassed that it happened like this.
I heard the book lay next to me softly on the table and the seat across from me scoot out.
"I'm going to get the ingredients for today." He said quietly. I could see his feet walk away from my view under the table. My head was brought up, grabbing the journal and shoving it into my bag shamefully. He came back with small jars and measuring spoons.
"I didn't mean for her to grab your diary you know." He confessed, not looking me in the eye. "I was trying to get her to grab your sketch book. I wanted to see your sketches. But I'm guessing the books look the same so she grabbed the wrong one. I'm sorry for reading it, that was personal." He was fiddling with his hands, his key sign of nervousness, I could tell he meant his apology.
"Its okay, I would have done the same thing if I had yours." I chuckled, trying to relieve the tension in the air. That brought a smile to his face, finally looking me in the eye.
"So, do you have a crush on Fred?" He asked, his face cringing slightly.
He's kidding right? Surely he's not that dumb. My eyebrows furrowed probably as far as they could.
"What?" Was all I could get out. I could not believe this idiot right now.
"Well I hope it's not Ron, that would be a little weird I think, and surely it's not me."
"Yes it is!" I protested back pressingly.
"Its Ron?!" His face was horrified now.
"No you dimwit! It's you! Merlin are you dumb! Georgie you're all I write about in here nearly, look." I pulled the book out again, flipping to a random page. "I taught him how to braid today, he told me he didn't know how and I told him I was perfect to practice on. He's actually quite good at it, I think he knew how to braid. For a moment there he was just playing with my hair and I thought that I might just blackout, it was a dream." It was from a night in the common room. "Or, more proof. 'The boy was sitting across from me on the couch in front of the fireplace today. It was perfect to draw, or at least try. The sketch is kind if shit but I can tell its him and now it think I'll look at it every day because I loved that moment.'"
George's face looked so happy. It was another one of those smiles that drove me mad, but I guess everything about him drove me mad, didn't it?
"You really feel that way about me?"
"Of course I do. I thought it was obvious. And I'm sorry to spring it on you like this."
"Well I certainly was too much of a wuss to do it myself." He said with a nervous smile.
"You mean, you feel the same way?" There's absolutely no way.
"Well of course." He said, as if it was the most casual and obvious thing in the world. "Do you see me act the way I do around you with anyone else. Braiding anyone else's hair, trying to stay calm and collected and seem cool around anyone else."
"Well that's because we're best friends."
"But is that the case for either of us?" And he was right. We only acted this way around eachother because we were hopelessly pining for one another, without even knowing it. And it was consistently working.
"Well aren't we just the perfect pair." I said with a giggle, pouring ingredients in the cauldron for the first time in 10 minutes.
"Are we a pair now?" He asked with a cheesy smile.
"Is this your way of asking me out Weasley?"
"Maybe."
"Then yes, we *are* a pair."
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stanzoeywade · 4 years ago
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Poppy x MC Tinder AU
Summary: based off that one tumblr post about a girl who never experienced an orgasm and their friend hooks them up with their lesbian friend. aka, the au that no one asked for.
in which Veronica and Chloe find out that Poppy's never experienced an orgasm and they decide to help her out by creating a tinder account for her, cue MC finding her account and shenanigans happen.
Warnings: swear words maybe some smut but nothing too graphic. (OWO)
If anyone wants to be added to taglist please reply. As always these are only my headcanons so enjoy my take on that tinder au anon asked @somewillwin about. Your brain anon omg.
Taglist: @somewillwin @belvoiresqueenbee @origmansello @clownery-is-a-new-personality @kamilahtrash @poppysminion @poppysimp @captain-hanadeleine @poppysmc @iiizdumb @uselesslesbianfr @scattered-to-the-winds @idiot-justidiot @toyhenoctus
First of all this discussion happens one night where Poppy, Chloe and Veronica get their asses drunk at a frat party. Believe or not the top 3 girls of Belvoire actually care about each other, they just have a really weird way of showing it.
A heart to heart talk starts and the three of them start to confess things that they would never talk about when sober. Cue Poppy saying "I've never experienced an orgasm in my whole life."
Chloe and Veronica just look at Poppy shocked and their jaws drop. Veronica just looks at Poppy with a weird look of pity, whilst Chloe just stares.
After realising what she said Poppy quickly sobers up and clams her mouth shut. "What do you mean you've never had an orgasm before?!" Veronica all but yells. "Gee V, couldn't you have said that any louder, I don't think the whole school heard you." Poppy replies sarcastically.
Veronica just rolls her eyes and says "Girl, you're not getting out of this convo that easily. Now spill the tea sis." Chloe and Veronica look at Poppy expectantly, waiting for her to elaborate. Poppy just sighs and looks away cheeks flushed, as if embarrassed.
The two don't stop pestering her, so Poppy has no choice but to raise her hands in mock surrender. "Fine, I'll tell you" she says as her eyes narrow dangerously. "But if you tell anyone about this, I will actually erase the both of you from planet earth."
Poppy begins to explain that none of her exes made her feel good, and that whenever she had sex with any of them she always had to fake it, so much so that she's started to find sex boring.
Veronica and Chloe share a look and nod at each other. The both of them say "We're gonna set up a tinder account for you to find a good lay (basically the british version of saying good fuck), because that's just pretty fucking sad. Why didn't you tell us sooner, like bruhhh??."
Poppy just looks away and says "Its not like I can just go up to you guys and say 'I've never orgasmed before'". The two just nod their head in understanding before taking Poppy's phone and installing tinder.
They spend some time taking and choosing the best photos for Poppy to use on her tinder profile. (If anyone has seen Euphoria, you know that scene where Rue helps Jules take nudes, it's like that but PG-13) Considering that the three of them were pretty drunk, it was surprising to see how well it turned out.
Feeling sleepy, both Veronica and Chloe retreat back to their room, and Poppy just feels so tired that she falls asleep as soon as the other girls leave.
Waking up the next morning Poppy wakes up to the sound of her phone beeping numerous times and annoyed by the constant ping, she picks it up to see that almost all the notifications were from tinder.
Poppy is confused because wtf? When did she download tinder??? And then it hits her like a truck, 'Oh shit, we were all drunk as fuck last night, I thought that was some bizarre lucid dream but I actually have a tinder account. Fuck.' - she thinks to herself, embarrassed that Veronica and Chloe know her secret.
She sees a few messages from the group chat. Veronica sent her a message. "Poppy, istg if you delete tinder after all the time we spent making your profile look cute, I will post the ugliest picture I have of you on my insta." it reads. What surprised her is that Chloe actually backs Veronica up by saying "Yeah Poppy, it took our three collective brain cells to curate that account so you better use it."
Poppy giggles a little amused by her friends' reaction and she messages them back by saying "Fine, but if it doesn't work out you guys have to pay for my next shopping spree." Chloe and Veronica just agrees albeit unwillingly, but they know not to argue back.
Poppy decides to check the messages and matches that she got on tinder, disappointed but not surprised, most messages say "Send nudes" or a nude pic is attached to their messages. Poppy just rolls her eyes as she immediately unmatches them.
You were looking on tinder for your latest hook-up with no strings attached because ewww commitment and no one really caught your eye, except Poppy. Imagine your surprise when you find Poppy's profile on tinder, deciding that it was a troll account you decide to message them saying "Wow, of all the people you could choose to pretend to be, you choose the HBIC of Belvoire. Stop trying to catfish people, that's just shitty."
Poppy shocked at the sudden message that she gets from you scoffs and replies back "I'm not pretending to be anyone, Farmsville, in case you didn't know even I'm allowed to use tinder."
You just roll your eyes and text back "If you really are Poppy Min-Sinclair, prove it. I might hate Poppy's guts but trying to ruin her reputation by doing shit like this isn't funny."
This catches Poppy's attention, and suddenly she's curious. 'Why would she even stand up for me?' she can't help but wonder.
Poppy screenshots your conversation and sends it to Chloe and Veronica who have vastly different reactions. Veronica's response compiles of this emoji 👀, and the words "Farmsville likes girls, we been knew." and Chloe's response is more of a "WTF, I thought she was dating that Zoey girl."
The girls tell her that it would be fun to mess with you, and they tell her that she should prove that the profile is hers. Veronica also messages her privately saying "girl, her bio legit says 'not looking for commitment' this is like your chance to sleep with her and if you don't, I will." Poppy just grunts in annoyance and decides that fine, she supposed that you were attractive enough for a hook-up.
When you don't get a reply within the next ten minutes you scoff and roll your eyes. 'Damn, people really stoop so low huh.' - you think to yourself. There's a slight disappointment that crosses your mind once the account stopped replying to your messages. You were kind of hoping that it was the real Poppy after all.
Against her better judgement (gay denial right here folks, you're the first to see it), she decides to take a selfie and sends it to you.
Right as you're about to unmatch to what most likely seems to be a fake account, you're surprised to see a message from Poppy's supposed account. It was a selfie of Poppy, where instead of her usual pink fur coat, she's wearing something casual, and to be fair it's a really nice mirror selfie. (This is what I imagine) (I still stand by my headcanon of Poppy looking like Chungha but I couldn't find a good photo lolol)
Doubting that it's really Poppy, you decide to check your socials to see if she's uploaded any new images, and so far you haven't found anything. However you're nothing if not stubborn. You ask if she could prove that she's real and not some weirdo.
Poppy just rolls her eyes annoyed that she's being questioned, as a last ditch effort to gain your trust she sends another selfie, which is a bit more revealing than the last and once you see it your brain stops functioning.
Regaining your composure, you message her saying "I thought you had a boyfriend? What the fuck?" The only response you get is a reaction gif of some girl rolling their eyes. Being the little shit you are you decide to annoy her by sending selfies back, each photo more provocative than the last.
Poppy amused by the photos decides to get you back and it becomes a game of one-upping each other to see who takes better thirst traps. This continues on for an entire week (It's such a stupid competion and both of you know but you're both competitive af so yeah.) until Poppy snaps and contacts you using her actual phone number instead of the app.
Poppy's already frustrated and she's annoyed because she can't stop thinking about you and your stupidly hot, gorgeous body - oh my god I'm going insane she thinks to herself. She decides enough is enough and messages you. "FUCK YOU FARMSVILLE! BACK DOWN ALREADY!"
You wouldn't be yourself if you didn't have a sassy comeback ready so you reply with "FUCK ME YOURSELF YOU COWARD!" sending her yet another thirst trap, this one more revealing than the others.
Poppy snaps when she sees the message and she's quick to make a reservation to her favourite hotel in NYC, because as if she'd be seen taking you to her room. She gets the biggest room because she's extra like that and she knows she deserves the best.
The only response you get is a pinned location on the map, aptly captioned, "Meet me here Farmsville and I'll make you eat your words."
Still feeling feisty you reply with "Is that a threat or is that a promise? 😘😜" and Poppy just tells you to hurry up.
This is a really stupid idea - you think to yourself. You can't help but be suspicious of Poppy wanting to meet up, after all she can use this information against you. However none of that matters to your lust riddled brain, considering the last hook-up you've had was with Professor Kingsley and that was quite some time ago and you're really horny for some action.
You quickly dress in your best underwear, and choose something fashionable yet casual to wear because let's face it even if you hate Poppy, you don't want to look like a loser if you're gonna hook up.
Once you get there, you quickly make your way to the designated room that Poppy told you to go to. Knocking on the door, you're lowkey expecting Belvoire students to berate you, but once the door opens all you can see is Poppy.
Poppy is dressed in nothing but her underwear as she pulls you into the room. Feeling a bit awkward, you decide to break the ice by saying "I lowkey expected this to be some weird plan where you embarass me in front of your clique."
Poppy just looks at you and she scoffs as she says "As much as I hate you Farmsville, even I wouldn't stoop that low. Plus it's a crime to share nudes without a person's permission." You just look at her in disbelief jaw dropping as you take all of her in. I mean if you thought she looked good in the photos, then damn seeing it in real life was a different experience entirely
She notices that you're staring and she just flashes you a smirk and says "See something you like?" and all you want to do is wipe the smirk off her perfect face.
Stepping closer to Poppy, you make the first move and kiss her roughly, each kiss longer than the last and you can feel your heart pound as your nervousness dissipates and all you can focus on is the smell of Poppy's perfume and how it drives you wild. As well as how soft her skin feels against your hands and it's enough to drive you over the edge.
Poppy pulls away and you follow after her, annoyed by the fact that the kisses stopped. You can hear her pant as she struggles to breathe.
As soon as Poppy catches her breath, she says "I'm starting to feel under dressed so let's fix that shall we?" She pulls you towards the bed and she strips your clothing off, and you can't help but stare because holy shit this is actually happening. You start to wonder if you're dreaming until you feel Poppy kiss you again, this time slower and softer and you can't help the wistful sigh that escapes your lips.
You decide to take the lead until you hear Poppy say something. "Wait a minute Farmsville." You stop and listen because no matter how sexually frustrated you might be at the moment, consent is always important.
You wait patiently for her to start talking and she says "Don't make fun of me, but I've never known what an orgasm feels like." You can tell that she's flustered by the way she looks away and refuses to make eye contact.
Your eyes soften up and you kiss her gently on the neck and whisper "I guess that's something we can improve after tonight, but if you feel uncomfortable at any moment in time just tell me to stop." Surprised that you even cared about how she felt Poppy just nods her head softly at you.
"I'm gonna start touching you, okay Poppy?" you say your voice gentle, as you hope that it soothes her nerves. "Just relax and let me do the work, alright, I promise I won't hurt you." Poppy just shoots you a shy smile and your heart pounds because fuck that's the cutest fucking thing you've ever seen.
Kissing your way to her inner thighs, you can hear and feel her squirm against your touch. In order to keep her still, you place her hands on your hair and assure her that it's okay if she tugs on it. You place your hands on her hips to keep her steady as you tease and suck on her clit.
Poppy's small moans of contentment makes you want to do more, so you try extra hard because you want to hear more. You can feel Poppy's body begin to shudder and you can tell that she's close and spurred on by that you insert your fingers into her core and thrust until you can hear scream in pleasure.
You can't help but stare as her body starts to spasm and you let her grind so that she can climax again and it's the most erotic moment of your life.
Poppy feels her whole vision turn white for a moment and she feels euphoric once she realises that she came.
As soon as she regains her bearings, she turns to you, who looks very satisfied, and omg did she just see you lick her juices off your finger. That sends a wave of arousal straight to her core and she looks away embarrassed from being turned on again just a few seconds after coming.
You put your hand on her chin and turn her face towards you forcing her to make eye contact. "It's not over yet, Princess. I'm pretty sure that we can wriggle more of those out of you and the night is young." you say your voice dropping an octave.
By the time that you've finished, Poppy's mind has gone blank and she feels so tired that she doesn't think she can move. She's got to give you props though, because goddamn that was the first time she actually enjoyed sex and she actually got to cum too.
Noticing that Poppy's too tired to move, you decide to lift her up in a princess carry and surprised by your sudden action Poppy's about to protest until you just tell her to be quiet.
Placing Poppy in the bath tub, you turn on the faucet and makes sure that the water isn't too hot or cold as it fills up. After the bath has been filled you slip into the bathtub behind Poppy as you help her clean up.
'Okay now she's just being unfair, why is she being so nice.' Poppy thinks to herself. Trying to make conversation Poppy says "Why are you taking care of me, I half expected you to leave after we fucked." You rest you chin on her shoulder and say "I didn't want you to catch a cold, and besides what kind of a person would I be if I just left you on your own? I like to think of myself as a gentlewoman." You start to place soft kisses on her shoulders and Poppy just sighs wistfully, feeling at peace as she leans back against you. "Don't tell anyone but this was actually the most fun I've had. Hell I don't think any of my exes would have compared against you." Poppy says shyly.
You can't help the smile that creeps it's way to your face. "You can't say shit like that Poppy, I'm pretty sure you're gonna give me a heart attack if you act this soft." you say teasing lilt in your voice and you can hear Poppy giggle. It sounds so soft and you realise that it's a sound that you want to hear.
Your relationship as enemies with benefits start and the both of you can't really keep your hands off each other, God forbid if you're in the same room.
Intense stares from across the room that everyone assumes to be glares, but little do they know that it's your own way of communicating.
One day Poppy calls you up and tells you that you're going shopping, but in reality it was just an excuse to spend more time with you. On the way to the mall, you guys get frisky in the car and before you can stop yourself you say "Babe" and you can't help but think that you've fucked up.
Poppy doesn't say anything but she likes the new pet name and can't wait to hear you say it again.
You guys go to a high end designer store and one of the staff approaches you and says "You guys look good together." While you're quick to deny it, Poppy just thanks them, but as she hears you deny it her eyes widen and you can see her heart break in front of your eyes. Poppy runs off and you're confused.
The employee looks at you and says "I probably shouldn't say anything else today but you should go after her. It's obvious that you both like each other."
Searching the mall, you're relieved once you see Poppy sitting down on a bench, and you approach her carefully. You see that her eyes are red and you feel shitty because you're the reason why she's crying.
Poppy notices you and she's about to run off again until you catch her wrist in your hand. "Poppy please look at me." you plead and she doesn't budge as she tries to get away from your grip.
Seeing that she can't outrun you considering you're holding onto her she just sighs and looks at you. Her face is covered in tears and you use your other hand to wipe them away.
"You know after you called me babe in the car, I was so happy because I thought that it meant that we were dating, but I guess I was just another girl for you to fuck." Poppy says and your heart breaks.
"I thought that you didn't like me that way, so I quickly denied that we were dating. I do like you Poppy, but you never made it clear that we were in a relationship. Though to be fair I should have tried to clear things up too. I guess we're both idiots huh?" You say as you hold her face between your hands.
Leaning in you capture Poppy's lips and she eagerly kisses you back, happy to resolve the misunderstanding.
Unbeknownst to the both of you a Belvoire student caught everything on camera and by the next day everyone on campus knows that you guys are dating.
No one dares to say anything because uhhh POWER COUPLE and they're highly scared of Poppy killing them lol.
Long story short Poppy sees your tinder account and you compete for better thirst traps and well you start fucking and it ends up with you two dating.
Well that was long, hope you guys enjoy, don't forget to like or reblog if you like it.
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vintagedolan · 4 years ago
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mixtape | track nine
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| masterlist | faceclaims | playlist |
Eden arrived in New York in the biggest coat she could find in a store in Los Angeles, which came equipped with a furry hood and enough stuffing in it to make her resemble the michelin man when she climbed into the car. 
She leaned back against the headrest of the seat with a sigh, an iced coffee in each hand. Her eyes closed for a minute, like she was trying to find her inner peace, and then she sat up and passed a cup to Indy in the driver’s seat.
“Vanilla, oatmilk right?”
“Always,” Indy laughed, taking a sip before putting it in the cupholder. “So uh, I love you and all, but are you finally gonna tell me why you changed your flight and made it so much earlier?”
“Drive to your place, and I’ll explain.”
Eden waited until she got out of the majority of the traffic.
“So, I had my original ticket and I was just gonna rent a car and show up, you know this, we planned it. But then I had the brilliant idea to come early and kidnap you,” she grinned, sipping her coffee.
“You’re kidnapping me?”
“Kinda. Well, reverse kidnapping I guess cause I’m forcing you to host me. You told the boys you were Christmas shopping like I said right? So you’re clear for a few hours?”
“Yeah.”
“Well good, cause we’re having a girls moment, because you need me.”
“I need you?” Indy laughed. She could never imagine possessing the confidence that Eden manifested every day, but she hoped one day she could have a fraction of it. 
“Yeah, because you’re surrounded by Dolan twins, not Dolan twins girlfriends. And I’m sure neither of them have shut the fuck up about everything going on, right?”
Indy sighed, which Eden took as a yes. The two had been talking more and more, but especially since the absolute blow up on social media. Eden had been the first one to text her that day with a simple message.
Been there, I know how much it sucks but it’ll pass. Call me later when you’re up for it
Indy hadn’t called. She didn’t want to be a burden, didn’t want Eden to think she was weak. Instead she’d gone onto Eden’s instagram, tried to see how she handled things, and from the first few scrolls on her feed it was blatantly obvious that she didn’t give a shit. Just a few weeks prior she’d posted a picture of her and Ethan in the mirror dressed up for a date, his hand fully grabbing her ass with the caption miss you bby. Indy scrolled the comments, blood boiling at some of the shit people said to her. She wondered if she’d ever get to the point where she could even stand to reopen her own instagram, much less post with reckless abandon. 
“We love men who think they know what it’s like to be a woman,” she teased, shaking her head as they continued down the road. “They’ve got such a protection complex, both of them, but Gray especially. Don’t get me wrong, I love it most of the time. Actually, it’s kinda hot. But holy shit does it get annoying when they underestimate you.”
Indy had experienced it first hand in the last week, and she couldn’t disagree. It was like she was on lockdown. Gone were the days of Grayson meeting her in the lobby of the building, or waiting for her outside of Jets. When he came to her apartment he was in sunglasses and a beanie, sometimes even a scarf pulled up over his mouth in an attempt to hide from any cameras he couldn’t see. He relaxed marginally when he got inside, but the only time he really seemed to catch his breath was when the sun set and they were tangled in each other’s arms, or when they were off the interstate on the back roads to Jersey. His shoulders would sink a bit, and his grip on her hand would relax when they took the exit. Something about the trees, still coated in snow, made him feel safer, made him feel like he could protect her somehow. 
It felt like a breath of fresh air to walk into her lobby with someone by her side. There were no cameras, but Eden wouldn’t have cared even if there was. She held her hand and walked in as if she’d done it a thousand times, though she had to wait for Indy to hit the right elevator button. 
When they got inside the apartment, Eden plopped herself down on the couch with a smile and patted the cushion beside her. 
“Alright, spill. Give me all the details, how’s it been going?”
Indy started to talk, and then she couldn’t stop. It spilled out of her like water, every single thing that had happened since her graduation date. Eden listened intently to each detail, from the way they’d changed their walking path to the hospital to the fact that he was looking into a new paint job for the truck to make it less recognizable. 
“And he’s just so paranoid, and I mean I guess I am too in a way, cause I like my privacy too. But it’s like he thinks I’ll die if a picture of me gets out or something, like damn, I’m a little sensitive sometimes but I’m not that fucking fragile.”
“You should have seen Ethan when the pregnancy rumors started for me. One big lunch at Monty’s later and all of a sudden I’m 3 months pregnant and I don’t know which twin’s it is,” she rolled her eyes and sipped her coffee through her straw with a smile.
“No fucking way.”
“I thought he was going to actually murder the dude from Hollywood Fix for that one. We burned through two Relax candles that week. Wild.”
“Jesus christ.”
“But hey, you already got the engagement rumor out of the way, so pregnancy is probably next. To be safe though, never even look in the window of a wedding dress store, and definitely don’t go to the baby section anywhere.”
Eden said it all so casually, as if making sure to avert your eyes from a wedding dress in a window was a totally normal thing to do. Indiana’s breathing picked up at her words, afraid that somehow she’d accidentally start a rumor about herself that would come back to bite Grayson.
“Isn’t that exhausting though? Being worried about that shit all the time?”
“You get used to it, and you adapt. Like the topaz ring for Lisa. That’s from Ethan and Grayson together, but they decided to send Gray in because if Ethan got spotted in a ring shop there would be an article about our secret wedding on DailyMail next week. Of course, that plan didn’t work out for Gray so well either, as we now know. Why the fuck he didn’t think about that is beyond me, but whatever,” she laughed. 
“No one was supposed to know about me,” Indy said, and her words didn’t resonate until they hung in the air. Was that what it was? The sudden shift in him being so damn worried about someone possibly seeing them together? It made her palms sweaty and she rubbed them on her pants before she spoke again.
“When did Ethan get over it?”
Eden scoffed. “He’s not over it. Still makes him want to lose his mind when someone says some shit about me. He broke a knuckle last year punching a wall cause a news outlet got pictures of me in a bikini while we were in Hawaii and said I’d gained weight.”
“That’s… absolutely fucked Eden, I’m fucking sorry.”
“I put it on my instagram story and laughed it off.” She shrugged her shoulders, as most women do when they have to accept unsolicited opinions from strangers. But something about the confidence she exuded when she said it made Indy believe that, somehow, she really had just brushed it off for the most part. 
“Is it hard to do that? Laugh it off?”
“Sometimes.” She sat up, getting more serious as she looked at Indiana. “But here’s the thing babes. Someone is sitting in an office somewhere, probably in their little house, with a bunch of clutter on their desk writing shitty articles about me. Meanwhile, I’m living in a nice ass house in LA with my hot ass boyfriend who bought me that bikini and took me to Hawaii. So who's actually winning?
“People talk shit about you when they wish they were you, that’s just how the world works. It’s shit, but once you accept that it changes your perspective on a lot of things. I mean honestly Indy, who gives a fuck what dolantea with 7 a’s the end has to say on instagram when you have Grayson fucking Dolan in your bed every night?” She raised her eyebrows, happy to see the smile she got out of Indy. “And if you ever tell him I said that I’ll put Nair in your shampoo.”
“My lips are sealed,” Indy teased, suddenly filled with a boost of confidence. “You have a very interesting perspective on the world Eden, I like it.”
“Coming from the college grad, I take that as a major compliment.”
“Believe me, there’s plenty of dumb people with college degrees. Doesn’t mean much at the end of the day.”
“But it gets you into a career that means something,” she mused. “I mean, being a doctor is a big deal, you’ll help a lot of people.”
Indy chewed on her lip. Every intrusive thought she’d had in the last few days that didn’t revolve around Twitter had to do with her imagining herself as a doctor, but it always faded into something else. It was her at a patient’s bedside, her helping them get to their feet, her sending them home with their family. Things that nurses did, not doctors. 
“Yeah. I hope so,” was all she could say. 
“That wasn’t very Indy of you.”
She quirked an eyebrow at Eden and waited for an explanation.
“You always keep a convo going, and you let that one drop, which means you probably don’t want to talk about it. But I’ll listen if you want to get it off your chest.”
“I don’t know… it’s just. The more I think about it, the more I realize that maybe being a doctor isn’t exactly what I thought it would be.”
“Oh. Well, then don’t be a doctor.”
It was Indy’s turn to scoff. “It’s not that simple Eden.”
“Isn’t it though?”
Indiana couldn’t come up with an answer. So instead, after the silence became too much, she deflected, making Eden walk her through the plans for the day.
A few hours later, once they’d gotten ready, they headed out to Jersey for the early birthday surprise, which Lisa was in on. She had ordered a massive vegan cake from one of the bakeries in New York that Indy picked up on the way, making Eden hold it for the majority of the ride. But when they got to the start of the driveway, she pulled over and had her counterpart climb into the trunk of the SUV, sticking a shiny blue gift bow on top of her head while she held one hand on the cake box to keep it steady.
Grayson appeared on the porch at the sound of the gravel crunching, cocking his head to the side when he noticed that Indy was backing in. He jogged up to the window when she put it in park, waiting for her to roll it down so he could lean in to kiss her. She hummed and smiled at him.
“Happy Birthday.”
“It’d be happier if you were out here,” he mused, leaning back to pull on the door handle, frowning when he realized it was still locked. 
“Go get Ethan for me, tell him I need help getting the cake out of the trunk.”
Grayson turned to do as she asked before he did a double-take at the very cake shaped box in the passenger seat.
“But…”
Indy repeated her sentence with a tight smile, but he still just frowned.
“Is that not the cake? Mom let it slip that she ordered one, I can just get it, cause Ethan is grumpy.”
“BITCH JUST GO GET HIM.”
Eden’s yell was so loud that Grayson jumped, putting a protective hand on Indy’s shoulder, though he didn’t know what he was protecting her from until he peeked into the car.
“Oh thank god,” he laughed at the sight of her, half hidden by the back row of seats. “He’s been moping for like three days!”
“Oh believe me, I know. Now go get him, I’m getting a fucking leg cramp back here.” 
Gray grinned, already feeling his brother’s happiness somehow as he bounded into the house, yelling incessantly until Ethan finally came trudging down the stairs, muttering profanities as he stepped out into the New Jersey cold.
“Bro, be nice, Indy worked really hard to make this birthday nice for both of us, even if Eden couldn’t be here. Just help me carry the cake,” Grayson said, doing his best to keep his voice steady.
Ethan took a deep breath and nodded.
“Dee, open the trunk babe!” Gray called, having to turn away to hide his grin. But he looked back quickly, not wanting to miss his brother’s face when the door lifted and revealed his girlfriend, sitting adorably with a bow on her head. 
Ethan just stared for a moment, mouth hanging open so wide that it made Indy laugh as she watched in the rear view mirror.
“You little shit!” He finally said, closing the distance and pulling her into his arms and out of the car, spinning her around for a moment before peppering kisses all over her face. It was like he couldn’t let go. Every time he went to pull back he caught sight of her face again and pulled her back against him until they were both shivering out in the cold, wind whipping at their exposed hands and ankles.
Grayson helped Indy out of the car, warming her lips with a welcoming kiss before they moved to unpack the car, letting the lovebirds have their moment. Lisa greeted her as soon as she made it in the door and sat the gifts down, her hair smelling like she’d just put on hairspray. Eden and Ethan trailed in moments later hand in hand, with Ethan yelling about how Li had been in on it the whole time.
In terms of birthdays, it was a chilled out evening. The twins birthday used to be a huge event, full of laughter and excitement. Now, there was a blanket over the scene, a silent understanding that one person was missing from the table - one who should have been a year older just a few days prior. But they made the most of their time together, eating the cake first gathered around the table before moving into the living room and starting on presents. 
Grayson kept a hand on Indy’s knee unless he was unwrapping, looking over at her with a warm smile any time that he could. Lisa’s gifts were first - new sweaters, Ethan’s red and Grayson’s green, a bottle of shampoo each, specific to their hair texture. They gave each other such an incredulous look that Eden and Indy couldn’t help but laugh, only growing louder when Lisa leaned over to smack their heads lightly. They got individual gifts too - a new helmet for Ethan for his longboarding trips and a nice drill that Grayson had asked for. They both stood up to kiss her cheek in thanks before they settled back down to open gifts.
Indy was let in on the tradition that Ethan always opened first because he was older, and she was more than happy to lean on Grayson and watch his brother open his gifts. He started with Eden’s, eyebrows shooting up when he pulled out an odd arrangement of things. A bottle of sparkling cider, sunscreen and a pair of swim trunks that were adorned with a pattern made of a picture of Gizmo. He checked the bag for anything else before looking back at Eden and waiting.
“Read the bottle.”
He held it up to his face, reading aloud. “Passionfruit Cider. Made and bottled on Maui. Oh shit. Oh SHIT! Are we going back to Maui?”
“We’re going in March cause that’s the only time when I could put two weeks together where we both don’t have work.”
Indy sunk down even further despite already being on the floor while they celebrated. She looked at the tiny box she’d brought for him, wanting to reach out and hide it behind her back.  
She didn’t get the chance to, because Ethan had already grabbed it, reading the tag. 
“Indiana you didn’t need to get me anything,” he said, and his sincerity made her feel a fraction better.
“Well, it’s no trip to Hawaii, so don’t get too excited. And your mom helped.”
He unwrapped the box carefully, opening the lid and staring down for a moment. 
“It’s a key,” he murmured, reaching in and pulling out the necklace, a silver key which sat on a matching chain horizontally.
“It’s a copy of the key to your house here, but as a necklace. I know you really miss home while you’re gone, and you wear necklaces sometimes, so I thought I could make you a little reminder.”
“You made this?” He looked up at you with wide eyes.
“Yeah! It’s not much, I’m sorry.”
“No, no, it's perfect Inds. Seriously, I love it, thank you so much.” 
Indy blushed anyways, not really believing his words but trying to accept them as he leaned over to hug her, grateful for the change of subject when it was announced that it was Grayson’s turn. 
He started with Eden’s, smiling wide at the tool belt that he pulled out, yelling when he realized it was customized with his name on the side.
“You can use that to build that side table you keep telling me you’re gonna make me,” Eden teased, which devolved into a moment of playful bickering. Indy used the time to line up the boxes in the right order, biting her lip when she handed him the first one.
“That’s way too many gifts,” Grayson said, frowning at her a bit.
“It’s really just one, it’s like a - well they go together - just, just open it.”
He did as she asked, pulling the paper off and unboxing the first one.
“A fucking nutcracker! Fuck yes!” He yelled, starting to look at it a bit closer. “Wait. WAIT. Is this Cudi?” 
“What!?” Ethan piped up before Indy could even answer.
“Bro it looks like Man On The Moon End of The Day cover, look at the fucking colors, and the moon.” He pointed to specific parts on the body of the doll, showing his brother who leaned over his shoulder.
“Open the next one,” Indy laughed, passing him the box.
He was quicker with that one, yelling so loud that Gizmo started to yell in the kitchen as he recognized the album art from Man On The Moon II, all tans, blacks and stars. 
“Holy fucking shit these are so fucking cool! Give me the next one, holy fuck.”
Indy passed them along, laughing when each reaction was just as dramatic as the first. The Indicudi was Indy’s favorite, with the mixture of reds and oranges. The collection started to take shape as he sat them out next to one another, adding the simplistic Satellite Flight nutcracker next, followed by the neutrals of Speedin’ Bullet 2 Heaven. Passion Pain and Demon Slayin’ matched well with the bright colors of Man On The Moon III, and Grayson was so excited by the end of the six that he had to stand up and run a lap before he came back and pulled Indy to her feet. 
“You like them?”
“You got me Cudi’s discography in fucking nutcracker form. I fucking love it, and I fucking love you.” He kissed her like no one was in the room, her heartbeat so loud in her ears that she didn’t even hear Lisa’s ‘awe’ from behind them.  
“I love you too,” she murmured against him, letting him hold her for a minute before he dropped back down to his knees to look at the collection, dissecting every detail like a six year old with a brand new toy. 
Ethan was just as enthralled, and she wished she could be as chilled out as Eden seemed as she sat and watched them. But instead, she was running numbers in her head, trying to calculate how much a trip to Maui for two would cost with airfare and lodging put together. 
She’d thought she’d gone overboard with the $300 collection of nutcrackers. For her, it was anyways - she’d timed her showers for two weeks and left them lukewarm in an attempt to save some money on her utility bill to justify it. Her mind spun for a moment as she thought about the little stack of Christmas presents hidden under her bed. A sweater for Lisa, a roll of film for Charlie to go with the new camera Dev was buying her. Fuzzy socks and a candle each for Eden and Cam that she’d found on a good sale. The thought of them sitting next to big extravagant gifts she was sure would arrive on the 25th made her deflate, so much that Grayson sensed it enough to pull himself away from his new toys.
“Hey, where’d you go?”
“I’m here,” she said, giving him a smile that didn’t make it to her eyes. The last thing she wanted to do was have him worried about her on a day that was supposed to be about him. He returned one in hopes it would lighten her mood, but he knew not to push it. In fact, he didn’t bring it up until they were back at Indy’s apartment, in their pajamas after eating extra cake that Lisa had sent home with them. 
“Did you have a good birthday?” Indy asked, tracing H-A-P-P-Y-B-D-A-Y on his chest.
“I did. Did you have a good day?”
“Yeah! Yeah, it was good. But today was for you, it doesn’t really matter what kind of day I had.”
“It always matters what kind of day you had,” he countered. “You seemed kinda upset when we were giving presents.” 
“Oh, yeah, it was no big deal. I just didn’t feel like I got you guys enough stuff. 21 is a big birthday.”
He leaned back enough so he could see her face, frowning down at her. 
“First off, it’s only a big birthday because you can drink, which doesn’t matter to me. Second, you gave us both more than enough, I have no idea why you think that.”
“Eden got Ethan a trip to fucking Maui.”
“And?”
“I got him a key. On a chain.” 
“Which is probably the most thoughtful gift he’s gotten in a really long time.” 
“It cost $20.”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“That’s easy for you to say, you can buy people whatever you want.”
“We’re just in different life stages,” he said. “You’ll be making bank once you’re out of school, you just have to get to that point. And even then, it doesn’t matter what you buy people for gifts. They only care that you’re there with them.”
Indy resisted the urge to repeat her words back to him again. She didn’t really expect him to understand where she was coming from.
“Yeah, I hope so.” She ran her hands down over his ribs under the covers, smiling when she felt him sigh under her. “By the time I pay off my loans Ethan and Eden will probably have three kids, you’ll have to spot us for all the baby shower presents.”
It was Grayson’s turn to fall quiet. He could see it - see Indy in a little pink sundress out in their LA backyard, celebrating a new baby on the way, talking with Eden and Lisa, helping Adele organize tables. And he wanted it. But he held her in his arms and thought about all that would come for her before that time came, and his heart tightened in his chest when he realized that he wouldn’t be there to see it.
“Tell me about school.”
She sat up a bit, running her hands through his hair.
“That’s what you wanna do with the last hour of your birthday? Hear about school?” 
“Yeah. Just wanna hear you talking to me,” he said, ignoring the tightness in his throat. 
She did as he asked, talked about the classes she had left and what order she’d have to take them in, the application process, the in’s and out’s of medical school as he tried to memorize every inflection of her voice, her laugh, and the feeling of her pressed up against him. 
When they woke up, it seemed that the holiday season had fully taken hold overnight. Suddenly, the days were flying by in blurs of Christmas lights and shopping. The pair were together 24/7, attached at the hip every moment that they could get away with. When Grayson was recording the podcast, Indy was just out of sight on the floor listening. While Indy was clearing out her laptop from the semester, Grayson was sitting behind her on the bed braiding her hair. Before they knew it they were trying to fit Bekah’s presents, and the cookies they made for the nurses into an already packed backseat of the truck on Christmas Eve.
A blanket of snow still rested in the city, muffling the city sounds it seemed as they drove. They were bundled up enough that Grayson wasn’t worried about them being recognized in the short walk to the hospital, and they shed their layers once they were inside the warm walls. They took the elevator, not minding the slow climb up to Bekah’s floor. But when they got to the desk to sign in, the nurses looked weary. Indy chucked it up to having to work the holiday and hoped that the cookies would lift their spirits when she left them on the counter. 
Bekah’s room had a small tree in the corner, covered in colorful lights and generic silver and red ornaments that were identical to those in every other room of the hospital. Bekah hardly reacted when she saw the duo enter in, though she tried. She sat up as much as she could but ended up back flat on her bed. 
“Hey Beks, hold on, let me help.” Indy rushed over to her side, fumbling for the buttons to raise the back of her bed up so she could sit up and see the room. Grayson held up her stack of presents with his biggest smile, the one Indy loved where he would clench his teeth. Bekah lit up, grinning wide at the two of them. Her skin was pale, and they could tell that she’d lost weight, but her smile was just the same. 
“Earrings, you double as Santa on the weekends or something? They already give the sick kids pity presents, you didn’t have to go so hard.” 
“These are from Indy actually,” Grayson said. Indy bit her tongue. She’d picked them out, but Grayson had footed the bill.
“They’re from both of us,” she corrected. “You feel good enough to open them now?”
“Yeah, yeah I’m good.” 
And she was good. But she wasn’t great. Just unwrapping the boxes seemed to zap out the small energy store she had left. Indy wished she’d had the foresight to package them in bags instead of boxes, make it a bit easier for her to open. But the excitement was enough for her to make it through opening the new Christmas blanket, which was covered in cats and dogs in festive sweaters, a Harry Styles crewneck and new fuzzy socks. The last box was an Among Us shirt, with a little purple crewmate peeking out of the pocket - Bekah was notorious for how many hours she spent playing (Gray and Indy would sometimes hop on and play a few games with her when they weren’t there). 
“You guys are the best,” she said, letting the pile of presents rest on her bed. She yawned, so hard she leaned back and her beanie slipped off her smooth head. Grayson watched as she reached for it and winced, and suddenly he was watching his dad there in the bed, trying to get to his phone on the bedside table, wincing in pain. His breath caught in his chest and he blinked hard, trying to come back to reality.
And then Bekah closed her eyes, and laid perfectly still. It was quiet in the room for a moment, and a wave of nausea rose in Grayson, so strong that he raised his hand up to his mouth.
“Beks?” He choked out.
“She’s okay, she’s okay.” Indy rushed to reassurances. “Look, look at her monitor.”
The blips on the heart monitor line meant much more to Indy than they did to Grayson, but he recognized them enough to catch his breath.
“Sometimes, when someone is exhausted like that, they lapse in consciousness for a little while. It’s a defense mechanism, she’s okay.”
“For a second I thought - fuck,” he huffed, running his hand over his face. Indy moved beside him, taking his hand in hers and kissing his knuckles one by one.
“What the fuck.”
They both turned to the bed, where Bekah’s eyes were open again. But they were unfamiliar somehow, none of that usual Bekah charm that warmed the dark pools of brown in sight. 
“Bekah-” Indy tried, but she was cut off.
“You two are dating? Seriously? What is this, community service date night?”
“Beks-” Grayson spoke up.
“I never ask for much, but fuck you two. Fuck you.”
“Bekah, hey.” Indy took a step towards her bed, and Bekah recoiled.
“I try. I try really fucking hard not to think about how fucked up and shitty my life is. I’m 15, and I’m dying. I’m never gonna go back to school. No prom, no graduation, no wedding. Not even a fucking boyfriend before I die and everyone forgets me. The least you could do is not rub it in my fucking face.” 
“Bekah, you can’t think like that. You’re gonna get better, you’re gonna get all those things,” Grayson said, blinking through the tears that had formed without warning in his eyes. They fell down his cheeks in uneven droplets, hot and unfamiliar. 
“Yeah? Just like Emma was gonna get better right? Well, her funeral was last week. She’s never going to play hide and seek again, much less anything else. What about Damion from my last radiation rotation hmm? God was gonna come down and heal him too right? Then why is he dead, huh? Where’s God in all this? Where’s my fucking happy ending? I’m gonna get the inside of a box, that’s what I’m gonna get, and no one will fucking admit it because I’m a kid, and I’m supposed to be here longer than this! I’m supposed to have more time! I’m supposed to get to do stupid shit in college, and grow up, and find my person but no. I’m never going to get those things, so fuck you both for throwing it in my face.”
“Bekah-” Indy’s voice broke on the word.
“Get out. Both of you, out.”
“Bekah please.”
“OUT!”
Her yell was loud enough to alert a passing nurse in the hallway, and she stepped inside.
“You two need to step out of the room please.”
The sobs didn’t take hold until they were in the hallway. They ripped out of Indy without warning or grace, and Grayson did all he could to hold her pieces together as she started to shatter. 
“Shhh, Dee, hey, it’s okay, let’s go outside,” Grayson tried to comfort her through his own tears, leading her towards the doors.
A hand caught his shoulder and he turned his head to see Jessica in her scrubs, coming out of another patient’s room.
“What did she say?”
Indy perked up from where her face had been buried. 
“What did Bekah say?” She asked again
“She’s agitated, talking about how her life is being cut short, how she’s dying. She told us to leave.”
Jessica sighed, looking down at her shoes. 
“We’re on our last resort. A final round of chemo and radiation. If this doesn’t work, we’re out of options. And it’s going to be brutal, it’s spread to her brain. You’ll have to be patient with her, she’s probably going to go through some personality shifts. She’ll be more emotional, more irritable. Sometimes she might be disoriented. This type of cancer, when it’s in the brain, it’s unpredictable. One minute she could be fine, the next she could be completely unrecognizable. Give her a few days, wait until after the holidays when everything is back to routine, and give it another try okay? Hopefully it’s better when things are a bit more normal.”
“Yeah,” Indy sniffled. Jessica put a hand on her shoulder.
“Indiana her face lights up when you two walk in that room. She talks about you guys non stop when you aren’t here. She’ll come around from whatever it was, okay? Just give her some time. We’ll be here to take care of her, don’t you worry.”
Indy wasn’t sure why, but she pulled Jessica into a hug. The woman was surprised, but she reciprocated anyways with a squeeze. 
“Sweet girl. It’ll be okay,” she murmured, which only made the tears flow even more when she let go. 
Indiana transferred from one set of arms to the other, back into Grayson’s strong grip which only loosened when he pressed the button for the doors. When they made it to the ocean hallway, it all hit at once, and her legs gave out. She caught herself on the support bars as Grayson lowered her to the ground. They came in waves that she couldn’t control, not for want of trying. 
“I’m s-s-sorry,” she stuttered, trying to force air into her lungs. Someone down the hall pulled a door closed quietly. 
“It’s okay, hey, it’s okay. Breathe baby, just breathe,” Grayson murmured, running his thumbs under her eyes to try and wipe her mascara, which was running down her red cheeks in dark streaks. He waited until she was able to take a few solid breaths before he spoke again. 
“C’mon, let’s go to Jersey. I’ll take you to Jersey.” 
She put most of her weight on him while they took the stairs out into the cold streets. It had begun to snow again, and the cold only added to the stinging in her eyes as he led her to the truck. She wondered in that moment how many times he’d had to hold her together, and her stomach twisted in guilt for a moment at the thought. Even still, she huddled into Grayson until he opened her door for her, immediately moving over as close to him as she could, pushing the middle console up to make it a bench seat and scooting to the middle when he climbed in.
His Dad had once told him it was important to be a confident one handed driver - you never knew what you’d have to hold in your passenger seat, he’d said. At the time, he was referring to the four large pizzas that ended up leaving a permanent grease mark in his jeep seat. But Grayson was thankful for the advice as he maneuvered the car out of the spot and out of the parking garage with an arm still around his girl.
The roads were quiet, and he questioned it until he remembered that it was in fact Christmas Eve. He slowed down when they got to the Jersey neighborhoods, looked at all the lights, all the families he could see in the windows, huddled around their bright trees. He could remember those nights like they were yesterday, him and Ethan sneaking to the top of the stairs to try to catch a glimpse at the big man with the red sack. When they were five they’d seen him and ran to wake their sister. They’d all watched in amazement as he placed presents under the tree and ate the cookies they’d left.
He’d found the santa suit in a box in his dad’s closet when they went through his things after his funeral. 
“Does your family have any Christmas traditions?” He asked quietly, running his arm quickly over Indiana’s arm in a bid to keep her warm as he drove. The cool wind that was whipping the snow around seemed to be outrunning the heater in the truck. 
“We did. We would watch Elf the night before, cause it was mom’s favorite. We did the cookies, the stockings, all that stuff too. But we always had grilled cheese and soup for dinner too.”
“Grilled cheese and soup?”
“Yeah. That was mom’s idea too. She always said we could leave extra room for a good Christmas morning breakfast if we ate grilled cheese and soup. So we always ended up in the living room with our plates and bowls and Christmas PJs watching elf. Turns out, warm soup was always her trick to get us to go to sleep early. Made me and Charlie tired I guess. She told me it worked like a charm every time. What do the Dolan’s do?”
“Ours is more Christmas morning. We do the whole giant breakfast thing. We open stockings first, and Santa presents, then we do breakfast and then we do the rest of the presents. Used to drive us crazy when we were little, cause all the presents would just be waiting for us. But Mom said it was so we were grateful for our food too, cause it was a gift that we had it on our table at all.” 
“Li is a good mom,” Indy sighed, resting her cheek on his shoulder. Her eyes were tired, the kind where your eyelids feel like they weigh ten pounds a piece, but she fought with them and won, still awake when they made it to the house. She hopped out and moved to the backseat, but Grayson caught her.
“I’ll carry the stuff in. Go get cleaned up, take a hot shower and relax. Mom will be worried, she always knows when someone has been crying, it’s like a sixth fucking sense.” 
For once, Indy didn’t argue. Instead, she went in the house as quietly as she could, grateful that even Gizmo didn’t seem to note her arrival. She snuck up the stairs to Grayson’s closet, grabbing an old thick flannel and a sports bra that she’d left, plus some sweatpants, considering she’d left her bag in the truck.
She had never been so thankful for a shower. She lost track of how long she let the warm water wash over her head, closing her eyes and focusing on the feeling of the stream against her skin. It was peaceful, but surreal in a way. She thought about where she’d imagined herself on Christmas Eve night at the beginning of the year, and it looked so vastly different than where she was, on the cold tiles of a New Jersey shower with her boyfriend carrying in gifts downstairs. The thought of him waiting for her gave her enough motivation to get cleaned up, though she had to resort to using Grayson’s shampoo and bodywash, which was an unlabeled Wakeheart sample he’d been testing out it seemed. It smelled fresh, with a vanilla mixture that was reminiscent of Jet’s.
Indiana was in higher spirits when she sauntered down the stairs, and her heart swelled a few sizes when she heard a familiar song in the background - the title screen of Elf, waiting on the TV in the living room. She checked rooms until she found Grayson, standing in front of the stove with two pots and a skillet going. She didn’t have to ask. Instead, she walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around him. 
He spun around, spatula in hand until they were chest to chest as he watched the stove over her head, holding her close to make sure she didn’t get burnt. He nuzzled into her wet hair, and then sniffed harder.
“You smell like me,” he noted.
“Had to use your stuff. I like that body wash though, which one is that?”
“Can’t remember. Let me see.” He reached around and caught her arm, smelling her skin.
“Ah. That’s Polis.” 
She looked up at him. 
“Polis? Like… Poland?”
He chuckled against her, flipping over a grilled cheese.
“Polis as in the end of Indianapolis. A smell that makes you seem put together and professional with a sweet note at the end. Vanilla. Like your lattes.”
As he often seemed to, he rendered her speechless enough that all she could do was press a kiss to his chest and wrap her arms around him, under his sweatshirt to trace on his back.
L-O-V-E-Y-O-U
He kissed the top of her head and stirred the soup. 
Ten minutes later and they were cozied up on a makeshift palette on the floor under a few blankets, with soup and sandwiches in hand. Grayson had made himself three vegan grilled cheese and tomato soup, and caved and given Indy the last can of chicken noodle in the cabinet because he knew it was her favorite even if it wasn’t vegan, though her grilled cheese was vegan as well. They watched Elf play, laughing and noting all the familiar NY scenery. Indy swore the man in the red jumpsuit had come into Jet’s before. They sipped their soup out of the bowl, and Indy listened to Grayson talk about the cinematography, trying to follow all that he was saying. 
Once the bowls and plates were sat aside, they found themselves wrapped in each other’s arms, and Nicole’s old trick seemed to work, considering Indy was asleep before the end credits. Grayson carried her upstairs and put her to bed before going back down to clean up.
Though he tried to get into bed without waking her up again, he didn’t quite manage it, his weight moving the mattress just enough for her to stir and open her eyes. 
“Sorry baby, it’s just me. You fell asleep.”
“Hmmm. C’mere,” she murmured, opening up her arms. He laughed, knowing that if he laid on her the way she was asking that he’d press all the air out of her lungs. Instead, he pulled her on top of him and slotted their legs together, revealing in the feeling of their skin pressed together. She was warm for once since she’d been under the covers, and he hoped his fingers weren’t cold as he began to trace patterns against her back. 
“I love you,” she hummed, tracing a swirl over his ribs lazily.
“I love you too.”
“Forever.”
“Hmm?” He asked.
“I’m going to love you forever. I can feel it. I’m yours forever Grayson Dolan, and don’t you forget it.”
He pressed a kiss to her head and felt her finger against his ribs. F-O-R-E-V-E-R.
“I’ll love you forever too Indy. Forever.”
The tears returned.
------------------------------------------
Grayson was the first up the next morning, after a restless night of sleep - or so he thought. Lisa was in the kitchen, watching the snow continue to fall outside. It coated the trees outside and muffled the woods in a blanket of white. Lisa turned to greet her son, and frowned. 
“Have you been crying?”
He hadn’t shed a tear since the night before, but he should have known she would know. A mother always does.
“Just some stuff with Bekah. She’s not doing well, and I feel bad cause I won’t see her again until next time we come visit after we leave.”
“You can always call, and she’ll have Indy. She’ll be okay love.” She stood and ruffled his hair as she passed, headed to pour him a cup of coffee.
“It’s not as good as Indy’s, but it’ll do,” she smiled, rubbing her hand over his shoulder. They sipped in silence for a moment as the world woke up.
“Do you remember the year Dad dressed up for Christmas? When we were five?”
“Oh yeah. That was your Poppy John’s idea, he did it for Sean when he was little. Said it made him believe in Santa for a few more years. Your dad wanted to keep you guys kids as long as he could, and he knew Cameron was going to figure it out sooner than later. He also knew you two would be spying. You tried it when you were four, but you both fell asleep on the stairs before you could see any action. He told you Santa must have carried you to bed when you woke up that morning.” 
“Holy shit, I remember that.” He paused for a moment, reflecting. “You all always went all out for us on the holidays, I never really thought about it. Thanks.”
Lisa smiled the warm smile that only mom’s could really give, and patted his hand on the table. “I just hope you’ll do the same for your kids one day. I know you will.” She paused for a moment, and then she smiled. “You remember what he told us, on that last Christmas? About what he was gonna do?”
Grayson could hear his father’s voice in his head for a moment, and it made his throat tight.
“Yeah. Said he’d give us white Christmases for the rest of our lives if he could.”
Lisa lifted her mug towards the windows.
“Merry Christmas Sean.” Her words hung in the air, and Grayson swallowed the lump in his throat, watching the snow fall. 
Eventually he went back to bed to coax Indy awake about an hour later, smiling at her bedhead when she rolled over.
“Merry Christmas Dee,” he said, leaning over to kiss her cheek. Her eyes widened a bit quicker than normal.
“It’s Christmas!”
“Yep,” Grayson laughed, brushing her hair out of her face. She caught his hand and pulled him down over top of her, the covers wedged between them as she kissed him.
“Merry Christmas,” she said against his lips, and he melted into her. He couldn’t think of how many Christmas morning’s he’d woke up wishing to have someone there with him. It brought a new kind of excitement that quieted his mind for the time being, and he happily scooped her up and sat her on her feet so they could go wake up the other duo of the house. 
By the time they convinced E squared to arise - which took jumping on the bed, a promise of lattes and the threat of cold water - Lisa was already halfway done with breakfast.
Grayson hadn’t exaggerated - there was a huge assortment of fruit, pastries and coffee to get everyone started. 
“Stockings first! Well, coffee, then stockings!” Lisa clapped her hands and passed out mugs. Indy channeled her Jet’s days to make the lattes quickly, funneling in behind everyone as they headed to the fireplace to grab their stockings.
She melted when she noticed the I. 
“Lisa, you didn’t need to do that.”
“Oh hush. Okay red E is Ethan, white E is Eden…” she trailed off as she passed them out, slightly confused when she watched Ethan reach underneath the tree to pull out a stocking for his mom that the boys had filled. 
Indy was let in on the stocking tradition when she opened it. Everyone got essentials - a new toothbrush, socks, chapstick, lotion. She also threw in each person’s favorite candy and a giftcard to a local ice cream shop in town with vegan options. Lisa’s stocking was more extravagant, with some of her favorite high-end hair products, a certificate for a free massage, and lots of bath bombs that were Wakeheart testers. She hugged her boys necks when they all stood up, up on her tiptoes so she could reach. Everyone funneled into the kitchen after that, the boys in charge of the vegan meat options while Indy and Eden helped with the biscuits and cinnamon rolls. They ate around a full table, laughing and telling stories of Christmas. Eden won the most interesting story with one about her holiday with her extended family back in the Philippines, in which they’d spent Christmas using buckets to get water out of the house from a monsoon that had made landfall, a rarity for that late in the year. 
Time seemed to fast forward as they moved to open presents. The boys spoiled Lisa, as they always did. A new iPhone, expensive tennis shoes to help her back while she worked. New signs for the garden beds that Grayson built and Ethan painted, a canvas print of the picture Charlie had taken from Thanksgiving. They saved the topaz ring for last, knowing it would make her cry. Her tears were enough to get Ethan’s eyes prickling - forever the mama’s boy, who just hugged her while she let it out, Grayson joining in a few moments later. She opened her sweater from Indy, complimenting the color, and a new set of Airpods from Eden, seeing that she’d lost her first set. 
They moved on to Eden next. She also got a new phone from Ethan, which she smacked his arm for buying considering she knew how expensive they were, ignoring the fact that her phone barely held 20 minutes of battery anymore. Grayson got her a new sketchbook with a set of top line pencils and markers for her to sketch out her work designs, and Indy bought her a pair of Nike’s that she’d had her eyes on. Lisa got her a gift card to her favorite restaurant in LA - a non vegan one that she proposed could be used on a girls date when Lisa came to visit.
Indy was next. She had always hated opening gifts in front of people but she swallowed her un-comfort and proceeded through the boxes. Lisa bought her a nice blow dryer, remembering that she’d complained about hers once and raved about the one that she let Indy borrow. Eden bought her a new outfit - it was a bit out of Indy’s comfort zone, with the patterned pants and bright top, but she hoped she’d be able to pull it off. Both Eden and Gray assured her that she could. Ethan bought her a print of the state of Indiana, laughing at the way she tried to pretend that she loved it. 
“Read the back.” 
She flipped it over, squinting to try to read his messy handwriting that told her to check behind the tree. Sure enough, she found a box with a stethoscope in it. Top of the line, one of the more expensive brands.
“Every doctor needs one of those things, at least that’s what google told me. It’s got your initials on it too, cause apparently people try to steal them.” 
He dismissed her claims that it was too much, and instead urged her to open Graysons gifts. The first was a speaker, because ‘Cudi needs to be played loud and well’, followed by a bag full of clothes. She pulled the first piece out and gasped.
“You bought me scrubs?”
“Yeah. I know you were stressed out about them being expensive, and I knew you’d use them. I bought five sets, I hope that’s enough. And I asked the nurses at Frazier what the best brand was, but if you don’t like those I have the receipt.” 
“I’m sure they’re perfect. Thank you bub, I love them.”
She knew that Grayson had held back, and she was appreciative, especially as they got closer to his gifts. Luckily, Ethan was born first and therefore got first dibs. He got a custom longboard from Eden that she’d designed with all his favorite things, including a thermal painting of a very scandalous picture of her on the bottom that she’s covered with a piece of paper so Lisa didn’t see. Grayson got him an envelope with three tattoo appointments that he’d managed to get with their favorite artist in LA, who was usually booked up for months in advance. Lisa bought him a new jacket and boots, while Indy bought him a pair of headphones designed for the inside of a helmet, so he could listen to music while he skated. 
Grayson was the last to go. Eden got him new sweatshirts since he ‘wore the same ones all the time’, while Lisa bought him a sweater and jacket. Ethan bought him extra organizers for his closet and a minimalistic nutcracker, though he admitted it didn’t stand a chance of taking the spot of one of the Cudi nutcrackers, which stood tall on the mantle. Finally, he opened his bag from Indy, smiling when he pulled out a few things. The first was a journal, made of recycled paper and bound in a dark green cover with his name on the front in gold. The next was a Jet’s gift card, a small inside joke between the two of them. The final one was a picture frame. It was simple, black with flecks of gold along the edges. Within it, the first picture they’d ever taken together, in the mirror of Indy’s room where half his body was covered in her writing, labeled muscles. 
“Can’t lie, I spent most of my budget on your birthday. But I have a matching picture to put on my shelf, so I figured you might like it.”
“I love it,” he reassured her, kissing her cheek quickly, a sweet moment before the bustle of clean up began. The afternoon flew by with movies playing in the background and the snow continuing to fall outside. The boys cleaned off the cars, and after sunset, they appeared with a duffle bag each and a mischievous look on their faces.
“C’mon, we’ve got one more gift to show you guys.” 
Lisa waved goodbye from the front porch as both couples climbed into the truck, the girls in the back.
“Do you know what this is about?” Eden whispered.
“No idea.”
So they waited patiently until they finally put the pieces together - it only clicked when Ethan got out and opened the gate.
The trail looked different from the seat of the truck. Partially because it had been cleared out, but mainly because they weren’t on the back of a quad, with the wind whipping in their faces.
Hidden away in the snow covered clearing, the tiny homes were covered in snow. The lights inside were glowing a warm yellow, inviting them in from the cold. Grayson parked halfway between the two, coming around to get the duffle bag before turning around, a sign for Indy to climb on his back.
She didn’t argue, considering he had the advantage of snow boots over her, and climbed on, hugging onto him tight as he trudged through the snow to the front door. He kicked the snow off his boots on the small front porch and then opened the door, the draft of warm air already enticing. 
The inside was more beautiful than Indy could have imagined it would have been. She remembered trying to visualize it when Grayson had explained where everything would be - it felt like years ago, that warm fall day. But the kitchen was exactly as he had said it would be, minimalistic with dark wood that looked black in the dim light and white cabinets. The stairs were beautifully done, and Indy found herself climbing to the loft to find the queen size bed that awaited them, with the triangular window that looked out over the trees. 
“This is incredible,” she mused, looking down over the balcony at him. He beamed up at her, taking her in. Her skin glowed in the warm light, her hair washed yellow in a beautiful tone as it hung around her shoulders. He found himself kicking off his shoes and climbing the stairs to meet her, abandoning his plan of giving her a full tour in favor of exploring her instead. 
She followed his movement like water in an ancient stream, cut out and formed just for her to flow along, and they ended up on the bed with her back against the soft mattress.
“Are we christening the house?” Her words were muffled by his lips, which were eager and hungry against hers, a feeble attempt to drown out his thoughts. He kissed her incessantly instead of answering, pressing all her buttons to make her melt for him. The heater was small and nestled downstairs, goosebumps rising in the cold air as they lost layer after layer, chasing the heat of each other.
He held her as close to him as he possibly could, blocked out the cold and the doubt as he bit onto her shoulder and rocked her in sync with his hips, watched her head fall back and his name sing from her lips as she came undone over and over again until she was putty in his hands. He came so hard he saw stars, slowing down with her still in his arms.
She was in such a daze that it took her a moment to come to her senses and remember that she needed to go downstairs to pee and get cleaned up. As soon as she was out of his sight, the realization of what he’d just done came crashing down on Grayson. The guilt crushed his lungs as he finally admitted to himself that he knew he was hurting Indy. He knew she deserved to know where his mind was at, where it had been ever since Ethan had brought it up. He’d been selfish, and cruel, and as he sat there naked he’d never felt more ashamed in his life. He scrambled to get his clothes back on before Indy came back up. 
She was still blissful, her legs a bit wobbly as she tried to navigate the unfamiliar stairs. But she frowned when she saw his winter coat. 
“Those aren’t pajamas.”
Grayson jumped at the sound of her voice.
“Yeah, uh, Ethan texted me, he said their heater isn’t working, asked me to come look at it.” 
“Oh. That sucks, you want me to come help? I can hold a flashlight or something,” she offered.
“No, no it’s cold, you just stay here and relax, I’ll be back. Might take a while, but I’ll be back.”
“No promises that I won’t be asleep,” she teased, climbing under the covers. “This bed is better than mine I think.”
“Get some rest, I’ll be back soon.” 
“Okay. I’ll save a spot for you. Love you.”
“Love you too.”
He headed down the stairs, slipping his boots on as quickly as he could and choking back his sobs until he was out of the door. He trudged blindly across the yard, only guided by the lights from the windows, and he knocked on the door.
He couldn’t imagine what he looked like when Eden opened the door. But it was bad enough that she didn’t say a word. Instead, she simply turned and called for Ethan, who took one look at him and pulled on his coat, following him out into the snow towards the truck. 
Safe inside the cab and in the presence of his brother, Grayson fell to pieces. Ethan could only remember a handful of times that his brother had cried so hard, and he held him tight in his arms as best be could, shaking with him as the sobs ripped their way out of him. 
Ethan didn’t even attempt to talk, only to console as best he could until Grayson could finally breathe. He pulled the extra inhaler out of the glove box and made his brother take a few puffs when he started to wheeze, holding the canister up to his lips.
“Breathe Gray, c’mon, you’ve gotta breathe so you can talk to me. You gotta tell me what’s wrong so I can help. Hey, I’m right here, it’s me. You can tell me, it’s okay.” 
Grayson finally caught his breath enough to calm down, with his hands gripping onto Ethan’s jacket collar like his life depended on it.
“I’m gonna break her E. I’m gonna destroy her and it’s all my fault. I love her, fuck, I love her. What am I supposed to do?”
Ethan sucked in a long breath through his nose, looking over at Grayson’s house.
“You haven’t told her.” It wasn’t a question.
“I wanted to, I fucking can’t. Every time I think I can tell her I just think about what it’s gonna do to her. What it’s gonna do to me. I don’t know what the right thing is here E, you gotta tell me.”
“You know I can’t do that.” 
“Fuck that, you’re me, we’re each other, you know me better than I know me. Tell me what to do.” 
Ethan could barely see his brother’s face, but the little bit of light from the moon showed enough pain in his eyes to have Ethan’s stomach twisting. He put a hand on his brother’s shoulder and squeezed.
“You know what I’m gonna say.” 
Grayson’s breath hitched once, and then a new wave of sobs took over. He shook so hard that Ethan was convinced the entire cab was shaking with him. Ethan held him, willed himself to absorb some of the pain, as much as he could, anything to help. 
“If it’s the right thing why does it hurt this bad?”
“I don’t know Gray. I don’t know.” 
“I love her.”
“I know.”
“She loves me.”
“I know.”
“Then how is this the right thing?”
Ethan paused for a moment, holding steady on Grayson’s shoulders.
“What would dad say? If he was here with us, right now, what would he say?”
Grayson pressed into his eyes with the heel of his palms and sniffled.
“He’d say that it wasn’t fair. He’d be mad that I hadn’t told her yet, and he’d say that she’s a good person who shouldn’t have to give up on her dreams for mine. He’d tell me to do what’s best for her, I know that. God, FUCK!” He smacked the dashboard so hard that Ethan heard something crack. He wished there was a way that he could protect his brother in that moment more than anything. Usually, he could step up, take the heat, take the attention off him if he needed. It was one of the few times that he felt truly helpless.
“You don’t have to do it tonight. You still have a few days. Just think about what you want to say, and bring it up whenever you’re ready.”
“I’m never gonna be ready, Ethan. That’s the love of my life, and I’m just supposed to walk away? And what’s she gonna say, when she finds out I’ve been thinking about this for weeks, and I haven’t said shit, huh? She’s not gonna want anything to do with me. She’s not gonna love me anymore, Ethan, and I can’t live with that. I can’t.” His voice cracked, and Ethan’s heart cracked with it.
“If it’s meant to work out, it will somehow. We’ve always believed that.”
“How?” It was a plea more than a question.
“I don’t know Gray. I don’t know.” 
Grayson didn’t know how long they sat in silence. They didn’t need words, just the comfort of each other’s presence as he ran through line after line of what he was going to say. He had to do it then, there was no other option. He had to tell her as soon as he got back, or he was afraid that he never would. But every time he closed his eyes to think, his mind was flooded with her, a kaleidoscope of memories and moments that he couldn’t imagine not making more of. He thought of the way his soul ached every time she cried, and he couldn’t fathom how much worse it would be when he was the cause of it. 
He threw the door open without warning, stepping back out into the snow. It took Ethan a few steps to catch him, but when he did he pulled him into a hug, a real one, and pressed his face into his shoulder. 
“I love you bro. We’ll get through it. You’ll be okay.” 
Grayson always knew when his twin was lying, but he tried his best to believe it. The cold wind stung on his wet cheeks as he went back to the house, kicking off his boots. He took the stairs one at a time as slowly as he could, his panic growing with each one. 
When his foot cleared the final step, he saw her.
She was asleep, curled up under the covers in her New York sweatshirt, hands folded underneath her face. He just stared at her, tried to memorize every feature on her face.
He could have stood there for hours, but she stirred only a moment later. Her eyes peered open just enough for him to see the blue, and then they closed again, a small smile stretching across her lips.
“Come to bed baby. S’warm.” 
Every cell in his body screamed at him, tried to pull him back as he slid out of his coat, out of his flannel, stepped out of his pants. His brain called him every name in the book, told him he was pathetic, weak, manipulative.
But his heart beat just a bit slower at the thought of being in her arms, even if it was just for a moment, the familiar home he’d made for himself comforting enough to let him drown the rest out and climb under the covers and over to her, pulling her into his arms as he pressed his lips together and let his eyes fall closed.
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gallavictorious · 4 years ago
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11x01 Reaction Post
Random thoughts on and reactions to 11x01; no careful analysis or anything, just the bits and pieces that's not likely to make it into meta proper but which I still want to make note of so I can go back later and remember what my initial reaction to the episode was (since my impressions are likely to change as the season unfolds). Mostly Gallavich related, because duh, but there's disordered rambling on a bit of everything. Under a cut (God I miss LJ sometimes) because this got long.
Ian looks damned good as the homocidal muscle. I don't do AU:s, but if I did... On the other hand, Frank as a member of the Chicago “Eight” looks like a werewolf. Less interested in that AU. And listen, I get that they couldn't get Emmy Rossum for this, but I really miss Fiona showing up in a few random olden day pictures. She's gone, but she's still a Gallagher dammit! Carl at the slaughter house looked weird – and part of me thought that was appropriate because slightly off editing would be a sweet way of communicating that it's all bollocks, but the rest of shots looked okay (Debbie as a milk maid and Frank as the aforementioned werewolf) or good (everything else) so no.
The sound of a baby crying is a horror matched only by persistent lack of sleep so I feel for Lip and Tami so much. Here's to all parents who managed to get through the first year without murdering anybody! I think that maybe you don't get enough credit... I, for instance, want to kill someone just hearing Freddie cry in the background for half a minute. Not sure it bodes too well for their relationship for them to be so ready to spend every night apart like Lip suggests, but a, what wouldn't you do for a good night's sleep, and b, love the thought of Lip spending more time at the old house. Could see them breaking up during the course of the season, though. Not sure how I feel about that – Tami's my favourite out of Lip's love interests, but having too many of the couples staying together all through the finale wouldn't feel quite right (for Shameless) and I don't see them breaking up Ian and Mickey or Kev and V. Don't really expect Sandy or Debbie to last either, but since it's more of a casual thing it might have more of a casual end.
Do you remember when the promo dropped and there was Concern about That Look on Ian's face after he kisses Mickey, and I tag theorized about it being because Mickey stole his coffee? Turns out there wasn't really A Look in the actual episode, but I sure as hell was right about the coffee, and I want noted somewhere. Maybe there should also be a small diploma? A golden statue seems a little over the top, but I mean, if you insist...
I appreciate that Ian is very adament about it being their money but when Mickey thinks it's their breakfast it's suddenly every man for himself. Do you share or not, Ian? Hmm? (Let the record show that I'm joking, please. Ian is damned right to take his toast back, and I say this as a “person most likely to steal their partner's toast right out of their hand”. I also love that Mickey completely gives up on breakfast when he can't have Ian's toast and just grabs a beer instead.) The kitchen scene is glorious and I just really like their dynamic here; the casual kiss, “I only make breakfast for husbands who have jobs”, how relaxed it is even when Ian's a bit annoyed, Mickey being so... Mickey. I do wonder what went through his head when Ian started talking about their wedding present money, though – he seems worried for a moment, but then shrugs it off, and that could be either bravado or just actual lack of concern. I tend mostly towards the latter, since Mickey quite genuinely figures this isn't a big deal (even though he still recognizes that Ian will probably think it one). Please note that he immediately offers to get money when Ian mentions that they need more of it coming in. Not his fault Ian vetoes his methods, right? (Also love that Ian's objection is due to him not wanting to be separated from Mickey, rather than any moral qualms about robbing stores.)
Okay, the gag ball. Would they really keep it like that if they were actually using it? Maybe either of them just tossed it there after taking it off, I suppose... Yeah, I don't know. Not what I'd imagined them being into, but that might be my own extreme lack of enthusiasm for gag balls and harnesses talking. Either they're into it and if so, you do you, boys, or it was a gift and they're keeping it around and semi-prominently on display for shits and giggles. (But if it was a gift, they did try it at least once, right?)
Mickey in the bath remains stupidly and surprisingly gorgerous. Incidentally, I really don't think his question about the meds is any indication of him not thinking them important, but there's little wonder that Ian bristles at the mention of them. Maybe not be an ass just to prove a point, eh, Mick?
I've already talked about how hard Ian is trying here but let's just take another moment to congratulate our boy on his persistent attempts at mature communication. Though he might have given some actual consideration to Mickey not wanting to save the money if he's really serious about them making decisions together... But he gets there! I think this whole situation – which would royally piss most people, including me, off – is actually particularly difficult for Ian, because he might well see Mickey's behavior as uncomfortably reminiscent of Frank and Monica's destructive habits and yeah, that would fuck him up. And still! He forces himself to calm down! He takes Mickey's hand! He refuses to let himself be distracted by Mickey looking SO INSANELY PRETTY I CANNOT EVEN UNDERSTAND IT! Ian, I salute you!
[starwars_eu_nerd_mode]KORRIBAN! YES! HA! TAKE THAT DISNEY! You take your new so-called “canon” and your “Moraband” and you fuck right off. I salute you, Bitcoin Boy![/starwars_eu_nerd_mode]
Ah, the porch scene... This one I do have a bunch of thoughs on that will probably make it into meta proper one day, so I'll leave it for now. It was the one that took the most thinking about for me to square (still not a lot, it should be noted), but now I'm actually very happy about it. (Full disclosure: none of their scenes feel quite right the first time I see them these days, because I'm just so very on edge about what's to come that I kind of miss the forest for all the trees you know? It's not a Shameless thing – it's always like this when I'm extremely invested in something and have waited for it for some time. Will it fit with how I see the characters? Will it be cringey? Will Mickey suddenly profess a love for hideous Hawaii shirts? Also, what are they saying because English is hard... But then I watch them a couple of times and they sink in and I start to get giddy over them. I guess watching actual canon unfold always requires a little bit of re-calibration if you've been busy fanoning while waiting for it to arrive, and while I love that sort of interpretative work, there’s also the fear that the show will veer off into a direction I cannot easily follow.)
Mickey's insistence that he spelled monogamy wrong does genuinely amuse me. Not to mention the whole “No more parking tickets for me!” - “You don't have a car, dumbass.” Also, Mickey being friendly with Carl kills me, in a good way. Family FTW!
Frank's storyline fails to stir even the vaguest hint of interest in me, as per usual. For all his talk of family in this episode, the lack of interaction with any of his kids is striking. If he's to have any value at all this season I'll need him to get involved in the rest of the Gallagher's storylines (which seems like it might be happening at least for a bit later on, so I'm vaguely hopeful?). I find but faint intrigue in Carl's and Debbie's stuff, but it doesn’t annoy me either so I'll call it a win. Kev and V are (almost) always a delight, but do anyone else feel like their kids are only props, even to them? I don't know... I just don't think there's a connection or sense of realness to their relationship, you know? Maybe it's just me... Anyway, here's to hoping V turning pageant mom changes all that! Oh, and I'll need Liam to have some more screentime and stuff to do.
The Tommy and Kermit thing was weird. Eh. Whatever.
Sandy is so gorgerous. I can't. The Milkoviches really be bringing it this episode.
This is only the second season I've watched episode by episode as it airs (other one was S6) and it's a curiuos experience. I think that by and large, and particularly in later seasons, Shameless works better when you binge it, but I love the delightful anticipation of waiting for a new episode and the feverent discussion that follows. Sometimes I also despair over the ferverent discussion that follows, but... you know. It is what it is. Admittedly, any attempts at meta this early in the season is a precarious venture at best, since we don't have the whole story, and it might be wiser to abstain but it's just so much fun, so I'm not very likely to stop.
All in all, I love the Gallavich stuff, am intrigued by Lip & Tami and Kev & V's lives, okay with whatever Debbie and Carl's got going on, hot for Sandy, bored by Frank, and missing Liam. It sets up a lot of promising things, but as an episode all unto itself it felt a bit empty – probably because there were no real plots and the storylines didn't intersect as much as I would have liked them to. Shameless is best when it's about family, which both the show and Frank seems to recognize, but there's little narrative follow-through on that realization in this episode; everyone is pretty much doing their own thing. Adored the Lip and Ian convo, and that house party scene was wonderful, but so short. Think we'll get more of all of them together going forward, though, and more actual plots too, so I'm very excited about it all. Can't wait for Sunday!
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misterbitches · 3 years ago
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so with s2 announcement which i am so beyond happy about especially since that was the last k-bl i watched and like the last bl i watched and enjoyed i think. on a level where i'm like oh this is a good movie. so i'm gonna have to watch it as a movie bc the supercut, minus the fades, is a well-flowing movie. they are writing them episodically with not a film in mind which is important but it's just easier to not have to constantly break bc the eps are short
first i am glad that the age thing is not a big deal bc i am shocked that this man is not a millenial like i thought he was lmao and that seo joon's actor is closer to my age wtf im old. but anyway idk i loooooooooooved kim kang min in it and han jiwoo and their interaction and that cool lady who wrote it or directed it or whatever like
"I like people like you" and one of my favs:
ji woo: you have a lot of friends
seo joon: i didn't say we should be friends
mwah the intricacy mwah mwah MORE KISSING MORE FUN and i hope that fUCKING CUTE AS FUCK TINY REPORTER and mr pil get together and we get to see them. i really loved her and baek ho min ofc but she's so cute. ugh. and i kinda wanna see if he managed to give the money back? looking back i really expect to cringe my way through a lot but nothing in the show made me cringe except my preconceived notions. oh wait no what did make me cringe was that blackaboo fan and the english portin but i pretend that didnt happen. this dude that played hyung ki? damn daddy u fine as hell i hope ur wallet got condoms in it
above all more of their interactions that are shown in physicality liek it was through the show
when they get all the orders and jiwoo looms over him
when theyre standing close before the cup scene
even in the bathroom when they dont wan to get caught by the Queen
the hands laid on ji woo when he wants him to ride the bike where he's like wait wait gets him to come around and puts the bag on him "hold on kkondae" that whole park scene which i could go on forever about bc seo joon urges him forward with a hand on his shoulder and it's fine and the comfortable islence
i really like kim kang min bc his ability for us to know how jiwoo felt even as obviously a) he smiles as a real person (kang min, not jiwoo) b) his reactions makes u REALLY have to pay attention for both of them but the writing lends itself well to that esp when he freezes when he's touched OR the scene where theyre drunk and he gets so mad even before they have that convo
which is like one of my fav scenes bc i was nOT expecting that at all like sincerely how desperate seo joon was and how pissed ji woo was. my other fav thing is when they both /know/ like after what happened and theyre back in the resto and seo joon is like "it seems like you're flirting" and ji woo is liek "what"
seo joon: "You know."
YES I DO KNOW anyway every bit also tehre's a point where when kSJ works in the resto at first after he asks HJW if hes making him do all this shit on purpose and HJW is like nope :) theyre all frantic and HJW says, casually and like not at all highlighted, "hey slow down" A BEAUT
and i hope we can see more about how they joke with each other. clearly they love each other's company and they definitely talk. HJW isn't as insanely quiet but seo joon just isnt shy which is part of why hyung ki was upset bc either he was crushing on him or insanely jealous and that much was not clear but i like that. anyway the fact that HJW cares about people ("dont smoke") but hyung ki just could not fucking understand it. which btw i def know hyung ki did care about him bc when the landlords come he pats HJW on the back for having to hear that shit. he knows he made the menu.
when hjw cut his finger and sucked on it (i know peole and chefs do this like freaks lmao) but he didnt want HK to help but then wehn he grabs for KSJ's finger and sucks on it and also holds his hand before dropping it and the awkward cute looks PLUS the beforehandof adjusting his clothes (KSJ adujusting HJW's clothes) and HJW lit about to touch him sigh wow im emo
then finally the end scene in which no k-bl (outside of strongbery) had gone before. and it was great. that whole convo and their laughter and when HJW was over him and KSJ met him as they had their faces close togehter (btw theyre vers make it vers u cowards IDC what ANYONE says bc THEYRE HUMANS AND THATS WHAT THEY ARE GONAN DO BUT ANYWAY I DIGRESS) idk that whole thing was great
also every time they were in a scene together it was just fun as friends and those who like each other and also their circle. pil hyun, yoon seul (noona!), ho min, seo joon, jiwoo. want to see their friendships expand and pil hyun and ji woo and i want to see how active jiwoo is now that he is way less alone he can absolutely laugh and smile and KSJ knows that. my fav convo is from the end when theyre talking about dating and KSJ gets jealuos and HJW was like u fuckin liar uve dated tons and KSJ is like wOW MY FEELINGS R HURT and theyre joking and HJW is like yea you are charming ok i get it but it's sarcastic and fond~*~* and how mature and easy it is for jiwoo to actuallys say things i think ive hit all my points the boys are there and i can't wait til we get them doing more fun stuff and shenans and not bullshit
also i think i thought kim kang min was older because it was easy for him to be in these scenes and situations whereas so many ppl u can tell theyre uncomfortable plus the ksising (also when he isnt smiling he does look older also wtf? idk i am like idk what anyone of any age looks like i could see son woo hyun's laugh lines which was an indicator but he still looks young like actually my age so i thought it wa silke taht but han ji won who plays seul is 25 and i thought she was ALSO my age so?!?!?!?!? AND JEON JAE YOUNG /IS/ MY AGE BUT HE KINDA LOOKS OLDER? kim jo kwon (baek ho min) is the only one where im like yes you are legit a baby lmao)
can u tell i really loved this show. the ending solidified it the first time i watched it. not bc i wanted something salacious but bc it was intimate and sensual and physical and so many are loath to go there and do it but the writing and team /did/ so clap clap clap
i did hate the music but that's cos im a hater if i think of more things i will put them down
also in the beginning when seul and hyung ki come in the resto there's the tip off of "your closest friends betray you" and both KSJ and HJW despite their ability to be strong and despite HJW needing to be guarded they both were betrayed bc they wouldn't hurt people intentionally bc being kind and fun (KJS) and being kind and a quiet talent (HJW) does not mean you have to be an EXTORTIONIST like i cannot for all of HJW's yrs of life he managed to not extort lol im gonna pretend this is a critique on capitalism
in conclusion
- more intimacy from boyfriends built off of the good stuff we already got
- more understanding of what they talk about and how; more depth in the humurous aspects because i think every great relationship means that they have fun together. or those are my favorites when you can laugh at each other
- going into both of their self esteem problems and abandonment issues particularly ji woo with his (righteous btw cos CLASS) inferiority complex bc of non-formal training and not realizing fully that people do want to be near him not out of pity . depriving himself of what he wants and seo joon being like "cool got it ill come 2 u" and how they deal with that
- ensemble friendship and pil hyun and seul dating bc i said so
- MORE KISSING :P
- no blackaboo character ever i never EVER want to hear ANY of those english words ever again i always skip through it but MY GOD NO
- longer focus on ther characters in the edit but that's a personal thing.
i rly do commend them for the short time and being able to fit a lot in it that didnt rest on exhibition thank god.
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evolsinner · 3 years ago
Text
⊱┊19
“um..twen~twenty~five.”
fuck. what the fuck! i tried to make it as close to sir’s age as possible, but 25 is the first number that pops into my head!
“twenty~five?” the mother repeats with somewhat surprise. “my boy’s what? twel..” she does the math in her head, “thirteen years older than you?”
actually 20, but 13’s fine too.
i’m obviously getting agitated by the tone in her voice and i guess my lovely date notices this because he places his hand on my thigh. it’s not like i was gonna say or do anything, lol. wait, maybe i was… damn, he knows me more than i know myself.
“mum,” sir speaks up, “don’t make it such a big deal.”
“oh, no, no, no, just making small talk, luv. that’s all,” she backpaddles.
“well, then, let’s talk about you guys,” mr killian retorts. “how’s life treating ya, dad?”
“well, son, business is business as per usual,” he replies. “revenue is good. great, actually. still would have been nice to have you back, though.”
“nah, dad, i reckon that ship has already sailed.”
“‘sailed?’, haha haha,” the father laughs mockingly. “well, if it weren’t for me, son, you wouldn’t be able to afford that bottle of champagne you just ordered.”
“you and i both know i worked my ass off at that company of yours,” sir hits back. “i earned it, dad. all of it.”
“boys, behave now, speaking of company, we have company,” the mother nods at me, her trying to be nice isn’t working.
sir sighs, “fine, tell me, how’s life back home, hm?”
whilst they proceed chit~chatting about their lives and jobs, my date proceeds to do something else under the table. something sinful.
hell naw, not in front of his parents. i won’t be able to control myself! what is he thinking?! just nope. not happening.
i grab his hand and place it on his own thigh. he scoffs arrogantly at my disapproval. which results in the parents’ voices fading and intense frowns replacing their expressions.
“oh, no, no,” sir quickly readdresses them. “i wasn’t..that wasn’t..it wasn’t what it looked like. it wasn’t directed at you guys taking that sick dog you ran over to the vet. i definitely wasn’t laughing. forgive me, how is it..she, i mean? is she doing well now?”    
lmao, he’s messing up so bad, it’s hilarious.
after regaining the flow of the conversation pre quick, he latches onto my femur once more, but this time the grip is unyielding. again, i put my fingers between his knuckles to get his leech of a grip off of me. only he hardens it, forcing a pleasurable sensation to trickle up and around my pelvis.
i inhale a long breath of oxygen, so long that the parents pause and wait stiffly for my exhale.
meanwhile, mr killian casually takes a sip from his drink like he’s so interested in what his mum has got to say. his mouth curves into a devilish grin, finding the fact that i can’t express my pleasure openly hella entertaining. this piece of shit!
he softens his hold...
okay, good, great, amazing!
then, he smoothly glides his hand up.
fuck.
i quickly lock my legs together like a venus flytrap.
sir puts his mouth next to my ear, “spread your legs, rosé.”
his voice. that tone. it has the capacity to liquefy the adamantine jewel necklace around my neck. liquefy or maybe tighten it to the point where i am choking by the hands of crystals and a voice too concupiscent for my threshold. slightly, i loosen my legs. not enough. barely enough. i’m fucked. that’s just all there is to it. i am fucked.
“wider,” he whispers in that velvety tone.
i do so an inch more, my face heating up as if i just opened an oven door.
“don’t make a sound,” his libidinous warning just an earshot away from his parents.
how in the hell can they not hear?
his fingers reach the waistband of my panties. this cannot be happening right now. don’t do it. don’t you dare. do not..ohh..damn.. he slides his fingers diagonally under the elastic.
fuck x2.
“so how did you two come to meet?” the mum finds a way to direct the convo back at us, or to me, specifically speaking.
with them talking about the vet earlier, i blurt out, “hospital.”
why am i like this?!!!!!
mr killian’s wayward hand halts and i don’t know if i’m pleased or disappointed.
“yeah, well,” i put more confidence in my voice. i’ll just have to make an elaborate story up. i should be good at this. “i was there with my family. my little brother broke his arm so we were getting an x~ray done.”
“oh, is he doing okay?” they both fake sympathise.
mr killian’s fingers catch rhythm again and i try to finish my fabrication off as quickly as possible so that he doesn’t make me fucking orgasm in the middle of it!
“no, yeah, he’s..he’s perfectly healed now.”
sir’s fingers on their way to their destination brush against my shaved extremities and the strip of hair in the centre. i am stock~still, captivated, embarrassed, red hot frozen. red hot frozen? yeah, fucking red hot frozen!! so are the parents with this storytelling of mine.
my breathing slows as i know what’s about to happen in just a matter of seconds.
“i went to get a snack from the indoor vending machine when~”
without a warning, he inserts a finger right into my vajayjay and i stop talking midsentence. my back is as straight as an iron board. sir shifts his sit a little closer to me so that he can get his finger in the deepest that he can. i clench around him so damn hard as a sign for him to get it the hell out of me, but all he does is clear his throat.
he
clears
his
throat.
that’s all!
“well,” the mother arches a demanding overtweezed eyebrow, “what happened after?”
“babe, you okay?” sir asks me ever so boldly; i could detect the libido hidden in his tone a mile away. “you were getting to the best part.”
“sorry, one moment,” i give the folks a pursed smile before facing my date and pulling him down by the tie to hiss, “fucking quit it right now!”
he finds it amusing.
brah, this bitch.
“not in front of your parents…!”
“did i have a say with that bj at work?” is the only thing he says and brings his head back up to eye level with his parents. “anyways, where were we? after paying, her food got stuck and that’s when i saw her,” he finishes off for me.
so this is what it’s about? to have a one up on the other? to level out the playing field?! i am going to deck him so fucking hard when we get back home!!
“she told me ‘don’t bother, it’s a money~hungry machine that exploits from vulnerable people’,” he continues passionately like it truly happened.
the father cackles.
“so i asked rosé which one she was going for and i paid for the same one which helped push her one out along with mine.”
the father takes the chance to add a little anecdote of his own. this gives sir time to concentrate on his avocation.
he pumps a finger in and out of me. i can feel myself getting wetter and wetter with each pump. i try extremely, terribly hard to maintain a straight face; it’s taking every muscle in my face to do so. i lowkey don’t want him to stop and i’m highkey having trouble remaining casual about it.
“s~sir, please stop,” i croak out.
“‘stop’ what?” he murmurs cockily, curling his finger inside me just to further taunt me. “i don’t see anything happening,” he gestures over the table with his other hand. “do you?”
arghhhhhhhh!!!!!
just when i thought i could manage it, he finds a second pair for his index finger by inserting his middle finger in. he scissors me, pumping in and out more vigorously now to tease the real thing.
he leans into me and whispers, “i want to fuck you so bad on this table right now.”
my eyes pop wide open, “sir...”
“shhh, sweetheart, or i’ll put in a third digit,” he threatens.
his voice stimulates me, his foreshadowing, his fingers and i just cannot keep up with this god slash satan of a man any longer! so forgive me when my control is deteriorating in keeping the extreme ecstasy at bay. my face is getting sweaty and i’m becoming sloppy.
accidentally, i release a deep moan like i just ate the most satisfying cake on planet earth.
fucking.
kill.
me.
now.
sir’s racy fingers become frozen inside of me. he drops his fork and it clanks on the plate. he facepalms so that he can hide his face from his parents’ view. omg, why is he the one embarrassed?! the father chokes on his food, hitting his chest mildly, and the mother immediately stops chewing.
“a~are you okay, dear?” the mum asks unsurely. she needs closure, needs something to rid her of what the both of them do not want to bring their minds to.
“yeah, yeah! stomach pains, aha,” i say with an ‘oh it’s nothing’ giggle.
she doesn’t pressure me on it, instead, “adorable, isn’t it?” she asks the hubby. “except why were you in the hospital, isaac? were you all well?”
dessert is served and sir gradually removes his sticky fingers out of me.
thank the saviour above!
“i was well. my class had an excursion there and i was supervising them,” he replies.
“what does an english literature class have to do with a hospital?” she needles him.
“many things, mum, many things,” he utters, slightly irritated. “perhaps if you took up extra english literature classes, you’d know.”
“isaac!” the father snaps, his accent with the pronunciation of his son’s name ‘i~zack’ makes it sound so very profound. “that is in no way to speak to your mother like that!”
“you’re right,” mr killian puts up no fight and dips two fingers, the fingers into the chocolate sauce poured around the panna cotta. “that was wrong of me. i apologise.”
i watch him bring the chocolate coated fingers inside his mouth before slowly pulling them out as all the sauce smoothly slides off.
i’m pretty sure my man, j.c, has left heaven himself.
“this is delicious,” he tells the waitress above, conceited and all. “what’s in here again?”
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punkscowardschampions · 3 years ago
Text
Ronnie & Joe
Ronnie: [is gonna rock up late despite literally living with Charlie so enjoy the entrance everybody]
Joe: [when you weren’t invited but still gonna show up like you have somewhere better to be, love that for you, the effort we’ve not gone to because we live here so it’s kinda okay but not really Joseph, also I imagine kinda shook she ended up showing]
Ronnie: [likewise in the sense that she dresses the same everywhere she goes unless it’s a job interview or court appearance lol but we know she looks good if you’re Joseph and into it, I imagine her zoning in on Jamie immediately like who the fuck is this and then oh I’ve heard nothing about you kinda energy soz gal]
Joe: [rude but not untrue in this case, at least Charlie can make it seem like you’re joking and Joe can go get you a drink like soz this is all we have energy ‘cos in jokes]
Ronnie: [I highly doubt they have enough seats around that table so I also imagine her dragging up something to sit on like yeah I’m here to stay bitches and drinking Joe’s drink while he’s gone as a throwback to when she did when they met at that gig and cos we’re obvs claiming him LOL]
Joe: [we know the food is gonna be studenty anyway so having smaller portions won’t kill any of us lmao, just dying at how shocked Sophie is having to conceal she is, host on queen, boring boyfriend having no opinions of course]
Ronnie: [don’t worry gal depending how much of a jealous rage we get into we probably won’t be eating it so you’ll still have brownies left, her face would be iconic and I totally picture Marc on his phone the entire time because Paul used to do that when he was with Trace]
Joe: [giving nothing to this bizarre situation, too real, Charlie and Sophie holding this together, soz guys, Joe jus amused af, do we sit opposite or next to hmm]
Ronnie: [read that as soz gays, ILY mum & dad, I think he needs to sit opposite Jamie so that she can accuse them of eye fucking each other or whatever so probably next to]
Joe: [okay yes gather ‘round everyone]
Ronnie: she lives here
Joe: yeah I told you, Silent Bob’s gf
Ronnie: you said he had a bitch not shes been chained to the radiator since youse lot moved in
Joe: maybe that’s his secret
Ronnie: whens he letting you have your go
Joe: got my own radiator you can have a go on when this is over
Joe: not to brag or nothing
Ronnie: wont be over til the fat flatmate sings & the other one sucking you off while her & mariah duet and the boyfriend pretends he aint watching youse instead is fuck all to brag about
Joe: be lucky if it got close to that level of mildly interesting
Joe: where are you in all this then
Ronnie: under the sink looking for drain cleaner or whatever else i can drink
Joe: why do you get to have all the fun?
Ronnie: i dont waste my time asking bullshit questions
Joe: how are we gonna waste our time
Ronnie: im gonna kill your shared girlfriend & youre gonna cry about it
Joe: I don’t think I am
Joe: no amount of tragedy is gonna breakthrough the chemical fog
Ronnie: you would if you could
Joe: [🙄 at her]
Ronnie: [tips however much is left of her drink into his lap not at all accidentally but we know Charlie and Soph will pretend it was]
Joe: [whip them off to go get changed boy]
Ronnie: [when you wanna follow him but you just gotta glare instead]
Joe: [probably taking whatever we’ve got in to make this go easier, ‘scuse us, so much missing out]
Ronnie: [you know she turned up already on something so do what you gotta do Joseph]
Joe: [Jamie should be talking to you about uni things thus alienating everyone else a lil ‘cos that is a bit rude and will annoy you gal]
Ronnie: [fully just opening up a wound over here literally cos she was already jealous but did not realise they had this much shit in common or anything in common actually so we’re just livid and bleeding]
Joe: [Sophie just running with the kitchen roll like omg do we have bandages guys like oh babe you truly only mean well, Charlie just giving the can you not looks of it all, Joe just jealous because we’ve obviously got our long sleeves]
Ronnie: [a spoken out loud fuck you at everyone but mainly Joe as we go to the bathroom to not deal with this but instead evoke the energy of when Mae downed that mouthwash because she definitely would and also go through the cabinets for anything sharp obvs]
Joe: [at least you can go under the guise of checking on her but really you’re just seeing what she’s doing]
Ronnie: [1000% have not locked the door because we wanted him to follow us but that won’t stop her telling him to get out because walking contradiction forever]
Joe: [locks it behind him in response]
Ronnie: [the most intense glare in response because could not be more livid rn]
Joe: [grabbing wherever the wound is like we’re gonna kiss it better or something like Soph for a casual bit of blood drinking]
Ronnie: [obviously have to push him away really hard because we’re obviously really into it and excuse you boy we’re trying to be angry and hate you, soz to all the flatmates when you hear that crashing about]
Joe: [lmao this tiny bathroom getting destroyed, steady yourself and her despite that clearly not being what she wants right now, roll up a sleeve ‘you never did the X’]
Ronnie: [the glorious visual of trying to get past him to leave/push him away again at the same time in a small space so you just end up pressed up against each other and the door making eye contact and it’s hot af ‘you never took me anywhere’]
Joe: [‘so let me’ do you mean let’s get out of here or in a saucy way either or you skinny as hell girl so if you not really trying to leave it’s easy not to let you]
Ronnie: [‘she’ll let you’ because we’re not just dropping this even if we want to]
Joe: [‘who?’ like an oblivious boy ‘cos clearly not where our head is]
Ronnie: [a really vicious read of Jamie based on what we’re learned this evening that I’m not gonna do because I am not that mean but it’s obvious it’s her and not Sophie we’re talking about, hope you don’t hear us gal]
Joe: [‘I’m not interested’ in every sense right now ‘and you know that, stop pissing about’]
Ronnie: [‘wasn’t any other cunt round the table hanging on her every fucking word, I know that’ because that was blatant Jamie]
Joe: [‘I can’t help it that her fella’s an accountant’ what do you do Marc, do any of us know lol, shrugs ‘we go to the same school, that’s it’ and a look like whatever the fuck this is is clearly more]
Ronnie: [she would wanna lol but we can’t because still mad ‘that’s it?’ not actually a question though more like you better be telling the truth boy ‘why the fuck have you never told me about her then?’]
Joe: [‘I thought I had when I said he had a girlfriend’ not not a lie ‘none of them are what I want to talk about, that’s it’]
Ronnie: [‘you were thinking with this’ grabbing his dick when we say so ‘that’s it’ cos even if that was true Joseph we shade the rest of the flatmates often and you know damn well we love doing it]
Joe: [shakes head even though we are very clearly into that ‘she’s no Soph’ like it wouldn’t be as funny soz]
Ronnie: [‘is right’ like yeah I know you actually seriously wanna get with her, and moving away but not to leave but to pick back up whatever implement we were gonna hurt ourselves with before he came in but didn’t get chance to because we’re genuinely upset]
Joe: [literally putting ourselves in front of it like no ‘Ronnie’ like I don’t know how you’re going to even put it into words boy so it’s mainly a !!! look]
Ronnie: [a look that starts out like don’t try and stop me/fuck you but turns into !! when his does like say something/do something if you mean it]
Joe: [got to go in and kiss you whilst making her push whatever she was gonna use on herself into him, now or never, enjoy the tension finally getting released]
Ronnie: [obviously we’re kissing you back so we all know what’s gonna happen next lol, soz flatmates I really hope you can’t hear anything, especially Charlie cos you actually know they’re related]
Joe: [it is not a big flat so keep quiet, just think he’s comforting her for all this time or what, god bless]
Ronnie: [she would be trying to keep quiet but not for y’all more so he thinks she’s unimpressed/not that into it but that would literally last all of a second because she’s obviously very into it]
Joe: [the levels you aren’t gonna wanna go back in but can’t be seen as being romantic lads]
Ronnie: [I could easily have her leave if we want though because it’s a fact that she doesn’t wanna be here and everyone would be relieved except Joseph]
Joe: [that probably makes sense, honestly, and you’ve freaked them all out, as was the point]
Ronnie: [and lbr you’ve freaked yourselves out with how good that hook up was too so]
Joe: [just go hide in your room like you’re very taxed by that in an acceptable way boy]
Ronnie: [god knows where you’re gonna go gal but please don’t OD again like you literally did in Margate no time ago]
Joe: [the headfuckery]
Ronnie: [poor Charlie just like UMMM WTF cos she must look bad even for her rn and we’ve behaved terribly and then literally legged it so]
Joe: [thank god you’re such a natural party go-er so you can make up some excuse to put them all at relative ease but yeah, for sure like excuse me]
Ronnie: [might be fun to do a convo between them when we’re done with this one]
Joe: [I’m down even though I really haven’t used him yet, I’ll give it a go]
Ronnie: [yeah it’s been forever since we did the group chats with them and Bronson and Bea it feels like another life, I can send you the convo we did where she told him she met Joe if you like cos I re-read that the other day and it was pretty good]
Ronnie: [but the real question is who’s gonna break first and start a convo and how long are we leaving it?]
Joe: [please do ‘cos did not realize we’d done that tbh]
Joe: [I could make a case for either of them, him to prove he meant it as he left it last time but her so she can’t automatically be on the ‘it meant nothing’ total defensive hmm]
Joe: [some hours later when the party is over, or could be]
Joe: Charlie was going pub, he’s left here though
Ronnie: [even later because whatever she’s doing she’s messy and can’t reply to the extent that she doesn’t need to because he won’t be expecting her to and yet here we are]
Ronnie: did whitney ask you to pass it on to us cos hes still disappointed like
Joe: couldn’t say
Joe: just letting you know that you’ll have a free gaff for a while longer
Ronnie: where have i chucked the other one for the sake of this free gaff in your mind mckenna
Joe: alright, free rooms better than fuck all
Ronnie: its his emmy oggie i aint there either
Joe: anywhere good?
Ronnie: compared to what
Joe: established it’s no brag compared to tonight
Ronnie: not gonna stop you comparing me & her
Joe: compare to what?
Joe: pleasantries over cocopops
Ronnie: youll be interested in eating her out now youve got what you wanted off me
Ronnie: 9 is easier to carve than an 8 and you wont look like youre trying to copy the infinity sign one of your other exes wouldve got inked on her
Joe: it’s not remotely the fucking same
Joe: if I was arsed about getting my numbers up there’s millions of girls in this city I could hit up before you
Ronnie: yeah youre not related to any of em and theyd have less clue how to shoot up than you do
Joe: even if the related bit was ringing 100% true, you’re the only user in town now?
Joe: you don’t have to pervert it when it already was
Ronnie: youre already romanticising it like a fucking 13 year old so yeah i do cause one of us has to get real
Joe: you reckon I’m so okay with it just because I can admit I wanted it
Joe: who do you reckon you’re lying to like I weren’t there
Ronnie: who do you reckon youre talking to like i didnt fucking leave you there for a reason
Joe: Fuck off
Ronnie: i did
Joe: for someone who reckons they’re so open, you chat so much shit
Ronnie: open to what soft lad infection
Joe: scars and trackmarks on your sleeve
Ronnie: yeah
Joe: you didn’t miss much
Ronnie: no shit you didnt just invite me cause you wanted to fuck me
Ronnie: can do that anywhere
Joe: yeah and you didn’t just wanna come to make Soph cry, like
Ronnie: i owed you
Joe: get it off your to-do list then
Joe: well done
Ronnie: stop crying youll never look as ugly as horse girl doing it or go for as long as her
Joe: you love her, we all 👀
Ronnie: i said shut up
Joe: no, you say something that’s not stupid
Ronnie: what for fucks sake
Ronnie: what did you reckon id say when you started chatting shit like nothing happened
Joe: alright, I don’t know
Joe: it happened, right
Ronnie: you werent hallucinating
Joe: nothing that makes that happen in the bathroom cupboard
Joe: I don’t regret it, I know that
Ronnie: meant to be made up to hear it am i
Joe: nah, probably not
Joe: but you wanted me to talk about it so I am
Ronnie: i wanted you to take the fucking hint when i legged it as soon as
Joe: you could’ve blocked me, so
Joe: pardon me for not taking it that seriously
Ronnie: not your crazy ex & i couldnt deny you your bullshit heroics
Ronnie: mary aint carrying me anywhere and i know how bad you wanna see me turn blue
Joe: you like having a stalker, is what you mean
Ronnie: block me and get your whore flatmate to tell you what she likes about you
Ronnie: weve established i aint got the talent to sing no cunts praises
Joe: we’ve established I’m not interested in that
Ronnie: cause you want me to tell you how smart you are at fucking me instead of beat the shit out of you
Ronnie: it wont last
Joe: familys forever, sis
Ronnie: not to your ma baby
Ronnie: did i look enough like her for you
Joe: what do you reckon
Joe: your theory, not mine
Ronnie: mustve youve still not fucked off
Joe: you’ve got room for another face tat or two
Ronnie: go do that then
Joe: you can leave out the yes sir
Joe: not my fantasy
Ronnie: no shit like youve been my bitch since you hit send on facebook
Joe: 😂
Joe: I’ve been worse
Ronnie: you trying to turn me on or what its a bit late for it
Joe: just the once, alright
Joe: bit cliche but probably for the best considering
Joe: very sensible of you
Ronnie: cliche that my da didnt stick around long enough for his side of the family to properly cut or sew me up so ive gotta regret not getting chance to put a razor blade inside me before you 💔
Ronnie: now youre gonna reckon i care youve said the once ll do when i just hate you & hate how you fuck even more
Joe: Could’ve said it was about as much fun as
Joe: it’s alright
Joe: both confused, clearly
Ronnie: youre not confused youre fucking smug
Joe: hardly another achievement for the fridge door
Joe: what’s to be smug about
Ronnie: probably for the best i dont answer that if thats how you feel
Joe: come on
Joe: aside from proving you were full of shit about not wanting to as well
Ronnie: fuck you
Joe: you don’t want me to say how I really feel
Ronnie: making me cum earlier dont mean you know what i want now
Joe: right, you want me to declare my love so you get more out of telling me to fuck off, that’s more like it
Ronnie: do i fuck
Joe: then what do you want
Ronnie: like you give the slightest shit
Joe: I do too
Ronnie: no you dont
Joe: I fucking do
Joe: [prove it in a way only y’all would, carve her name or something]
Ronnie: [send him your own pics of the bite marks you’re covered in which is a self harming thing you’ve not done since you were a kid because it’s been a headfuck every second since you two met and we’re not coping honey]
Joe: you hungry?
Joe: you didn’t eat fuck all, I mean
Joe: could get something not dubiously prepared by Soph
Ronnie: hungry as you are funny
Joe: I weren’t trying to be
Joe: on the spectrum, or whatever you said
Ronnie: you wish you had the excuse or the musical prodigy status
Joe: 💔 about that genuinely
Joe: just a dickhead
Ronnie: yeah
Joe: I don’t know what to say
Joe: there’s no point saying I’m sorry
Ronnie: no point is right youre not sorry
Joe: nah
Joe: it’d be lovely for you if I’d found you and you were fine
Joe: but like you said, it ain’t about me or her, it’s about loads of shit and you clearly weren’t so
Joe: just seems pointless
Ronnie: im made up you finally got your head round it
Joe: Yeah well, I didn’t tell you I was a good person
Joe: don’t mean I don’t give no fucks, just ‘cos I ain’t trying to save you
Ronnie: you keep telling me you aint like it matters to me who you are
Joe: yeah, it doesn’t in why you’re fucked
Joe: but what do you want from me
Ronnie: its your fucking fault im like this climbing the walls same as when i was a kid
Joe: yeah ‘cos you were doing really great before weren’t ya
Ronnie: all you give a fuck about is letting yourself off the fucking hook
Joe: Blame me then what does it change
Joe: do something about it other than fucking yourself up, I don’t care
Ronnie: stop lying that youre bothered if your only answer to me losing my mind is that i was before
Joe: I can’t help you
Joe: If you thought I could, though why the fuck you would
Joe: then I am sorry
Ronnie: 💔🖕
Joe: I’ve got my own problems
Joe: if I had any solutions, I’d light ‘em up and shoot them into myself first, naturally
Ronnie: youve got a solution i gave it to you
Ronnie: why the fuck would you make me feel something
Joe: Selfishness
Joe: pure and simple
Ronnie: on your way to a grown up habit im dead proud
Joe: what more could I want
Ronnie: that to scab over seeing as youve finally admitted its bullshit
Joe: I still think about you constantly
Joe: I still want to know everything about you
Joe: I’d rot with you
Ronnie: youve got your own problems to think about
Joe: yeah, and that’s hell
Joe: I’ve done plenty of that
Ronnie: yeah and youve got your escape
Joe: take yours
Joe: can have plan bs and cs even if a is the best
Ronnie: youre the kid who tells the rest to jump off a bridge
Ronnie: cute
Joe: you’re implying I wouldn’t and all
Ronnie: i dont give a shit what you do but i aint giving you the satisfaction of being the last fuck i ever had
Ronnie: youd cling to life long enough to write a pathetic song about it
Joe: that’s the nicest thing you’ve said
Joe: which is saying something ‘cos you’re so sweet, like
Ronnie: youre welcome
Joe: I’ll do a Dylan style ballad about all your 👼🏼 deeds
Ronnie: thats the biggest turn off out of everything youve ever said or done
Joe: thank god, you’re insatiable 😏
Ronnie: once you said
Joe: not for my benefit
Ronnie: its all only for your benefit remember
Joe: if that were true you’d still be here
Ronnie: if it was true i could be
Joe: come back
Ronnie: cant ive got a face tat to get done
Joe: I understand
Joe: my art isn’t there yet
Joe: won’t ruin your beauty
Ronnie: go ed and chuck yourself off a bridge you dont have to wait for me to boot your door in & do you in for chatting shit
Joe: well I am already devvo I’m not a prodigy so yeah, add lack of a steady hand to the list of failures
Joe: probably the meds
Joe: you know being poetic is all I do, why have we downgraded it to chatting shit 💔
Ronnie: why are you calling me beautiful when you could write it in your suicide note for your ma theres your downgrade
Joe: you’re too romantic for your own good
Joe: I wouldn’t be writing a note, sorry to dash your illusions
Ronnie: not me saying i get you mckenna thats your delusion
Ronnie: what are you gonna draw on me then
Joe: you do but it’s more fun to take the piss and pretend you don’t so
Joe: That is the question
Joe: won’t brand you, don’t worry
Ronnie: if i dont want it ill cut it out no pressure
Joe: it’s just skin right
Ronnie: yeah
Joe: how olds your oldest scar
Ronnie: older than you
Joe: what did you do
Ronnie: i used to take headbanging literally
Joe: ah, the floor never saw you coming, yeah
Joe: I have a head scar too [cos he either does or did on the stalker show idk but there we go with a photo like she probably knows hun]
Ronnie: [I just imagine her smiling to herself like yeah I know nerd]
Ronnie: cant both be poets had to express myself somehow before i pushed a safety pin through my cheek
Joe: that explains the permanent 😾
Joe: fucked the muscles, like
Ronnie: your shit jokes do
Joe: it was always easier to just start fights to get hurt
Joe: when I was a kid
Joe: though you work out ways to be sneaky fast, if you have to
Ronnie: they didnt wanna fight me
Joe: everyday sexism strikes again
Ronnie: fuck off not cos im a girl
Joe: why then
Ronnie: wouldnt be me getting hurt and if i was i didnt care
Ronnie: all those mental problems you told that call centre cunt about like
Joe: ‘course you were too proud to make it count
Joe: have to let them get some punches in or there was no point, yeah
Ronnie: no point in fitz flouncing in either fun though
Joe: true
Joe: I’ve got a brother and all, I remember what it’s like
Ronnie: scraps never went far enough
Joe: yeah
Joe: most kids aren’t that psycho
Ronnie: 💔
Joe: being misunderstood served me so well for the whole musician thing so whatever, I guess
Ronnie: i mightve bothered keeping some of my bastards about if they were guaranteed nutters thatd serve you well
Joe: you’d get your own room then, like
Joe: even if you had to pack them to the rafters
Ronnie: for a stalker youre dead concerned about my privacy
Joe: nah, ‘course not
Joe: I’d rather have a place to do the gear without the possibility of Soph or Charlie 🥺ing at us obvs, nothing but selfishness
Ronnie: theres loads of places
Joe: you can show me
Ronnie: is she there now she can let me in
Joe: no idea
Joe: their room is near the door, makes sense they’d be your first victims
Ronnie: youre too selfish to get off your arse and do it
Joe: if you’re coming I’ll carry you in myself, you know that
Ronnie: ill be there and youll still be going on about what youre gonna do
Ronnie: no wonder the other kids kept smacking you
Joe: yeah, all mouth me, deffo what I was known for
Joe: not a euphemism and I don’t think they were wishing it was but who knows
Ronnie: you sure you dont want charlie giving you the eye
Ronnie: how it sounds
Joe: I’m alright, tah
Joe: pretty sure he’s over it now I’m enabling you
Ronnie: hes over everything thats not horse girls from kent but reckons the fucking lost causes are us
Joe: He clearly just gives a shit about appearances
Joe: looking nice, polite
Joe: they’ll never speak again, like
Ronnie: forget him
Ronnie: open the door
Joe: [do that boy]
Ronnie: [boop his little head scar as you come in like oh there it is]
Joe: [‘s’not even a good story’ and producing some takeaway moment from the kitchen as you go through ‘cos the dinner party was not heavy on the dinner bit]
Ronnie: [a look like ffs because people caring in any way ew no but we are gonna eat it because probably haven't since that Margate moment]
Joe: [shrugging like bitch I’m hungry as we tuck in, obviously]
Ronnie: [kick him while you've still got your big boots on but playfully not aggressively]
Joe: [😏 but in a more genuine way than that cocky face looks, I am vibing Chinese not that that matters but there we go]
Ronnie: [weirdly I also thought that maybe because it's one of the grossest haha but yeah eat your food lads]
Joe: [greasy greasy goodness, love the subtle shade if any of them come out for a cuppa or whatever like oh hello again lol]
Ronnie: [I hope it's oblivious Marc just living his life]
Joe: [that’d be most amusing, unbothered, casually]
Ronnie: [I just imagine them doing stuff to try and make him notice like when people stack stuff on a sleeping person but idk what you could do in that little kitchen]
Joe: [for sure, just being subtly annoying/weird and he is just like does not compute ‘cos we mind our own business, so childish]
Ronnie: [love that for you two]
Joe: [we stan the regression for you]
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