#but couldn't focus

[kyofsonder]

It can be, of course, very hard to read a lot and/or play a lot. Fiction books, nonfiction books, TTRPG rulebooks, and the materials to access them can be hard to get and hard to engage with for many people. I'm personally struggling to read the way I used to, and to play TTRPGs in the capacity I want to play them.

That said, there are almost always workarounds:

> Where books can't be bought, they can be borrowed. Where libraries can't be reached in-person, there's the Libby and Overdrive apps.

> When it's hard to read, audiobooks are a good option -- Libby and Overdrive have these as well, and there are several places like Audible where they can be bought. There are narrative fiction podcasts that are structured similarly to novels, too, like Wolf 359 and The Penumbra Podcast and The Bright Sessions -- as well as podcasts that review books, suggest books, and talk about reading and writing as skills and craft.

> When reading or listening to audiobooks/narrative podcasts by yourself isn't motivating enough for you to finish the stories you start, when you need someone to listen to your observations and theories and feelings about what you read, the traditional book club is just one of several good options to make reading fun for you. You can try to find an existing one at a library or rec center near you, or find communities online. There are Tumblr circles and communities, subreddits, Twitter circles (if you're willing to brave the rest of what that site has and is in order to get to them), Discord groups, pen pal programs, and apps that are specifically focused on the social side of reading -- Goodreads lends well to that, and I found one recently called Fable that has an entire social tab just for book clubs. If you can't find any, online or in person, that suit you then starting your own is also (admittedly, too daunting for me as I am now) a path some people could take to getting satisfaction from their reading.

> If getting a group together for a TTRPG -- especially one that isn't the easily identifiable D&D 5e -- isn't coming together, try solo TTRPGs. They come in many forms; some have you telling a story in a journal and focus heavily on roleplay, others have you build a dungeon room by room and focus almost entirely on combat. I've seen tabletop Stardew Valley simulators and grimdark 80's-style fantasy dungeon crawls, games that use playing cards and games that use tarot decks and games that have you roll 5 types of dice to get through a campaign. I've seen a lot that just give you the bare bones of a game structure, and invite you to hack it and change it to fit how you want to play. It misses the social aspect of the game in many ways, but it's fun to talk with people about what you did in your last game session and it's great for finding out what you like best in your narratives and your game mechanics.

> When getting either group or solo TTRPGs is difficult due to cost, there are plenty of resources that let you play until you have money to support small creators. Pirate from the big companies that don't pay their creators, but for indie games you can usually find free or very cheap versions of their games on itch.io and download them without hurting your own finances. There are also free options for PDF readers if you don't want to or can't buy one, such as LibreOffice and OpenOffice and (though it's not as good as it used to be) Kingsoft. Printing game books out at a library should be fairly inexpensive if you want it in physical form and don't have a printer of your own, too.

> If it's material costs that are the issue, because you have nothing left after deciding you'd rather back a small creator's Kickstarter or go to a chain bookstore or whatever you picked, that can be a little harder to source. But Tabletop Simulator has a one-time fee if your computer can handle it, and there are free playing card and tarot emulating websites and dice emulating apps all over the internet. When none of that is available and no friends or family can help you out, DIY also works -- provided you have the time and energy, which you may need to gather first before you start.

Put in as much or as little effort as you want, especially if writing and/or TTRPG gaming are more casual for you, but remember there are resources and ways to do things so you get the most of your writing and/or your games. You can build a foundation off the stories you read and the games you play, and there are always people looking to make building that foundation a more accessible process. Find your way in, the one that best suits how you read and what you write, how you play and what you design. Taking breaks is fair, and moving on if these aren't that important to you is fair, but if you love what you do and want to have a better foundation for doing it then the way to do that is by surrounding yourself by it as much as possible and making it a part of your life. A part of you, as much as possible. So try not to get discouraged by lack of access or by the things that slow you down. There's usually a way forward, just not necessarily through the first door you try.

Read to be a better writer. Find any path to reading you can, and follow it to where you want/need to be.

Play TTRPGs to be a better TTRPG designer (amd a better GM/DM/player, too). Find any path to playing you can, and follow it to where you want/need to be.

This is how you build skills, and reinforce passion. And it's fun, too, if you let it be.

If you are going to be an author you have GOT to read books.

If you are going to be a TTRPG designer you have GOT to play or at least read the rulebooks for TTRPGs.

[phantom-shell]

The archivist is in for a VERY long statement

[yomeiu]

いまに、ここから出ても、自分はやっぱり狂人、 いや、癈人という刻印を額に打たれる事でしょう。

[fictionadventurer]

I love libraries.

I'm browsing the WWI shelves (as you do) and notice a very old book about the war. I glance at the first pages that talk about how one day the war will be over and we'll look at this place and not see any signs of the battlefield.

Then it hits me. And I check the publishing date.

This book was printed before the war's end. Not written. Printed. The physical object was created in 1918, while the war in question was raging and the end was as yet uncertain.

Now I'm standing on the other side of the apocalypse, with this physical link to that era in my hands. I'm living proof that the war did end and life did go on and we can all look at the end of the world as a long-ago memory.

Reading old books is cool enough, connecting our minds and hearts through the ideas of people who lived long ago, but there's something extra profound about holding a copy of the book that comes from the time that it was written. It's a physical link between the past and the present connecting me to those long-ago people. A piece of the past come into the future that gives me the chance to almost take the hand of some long-ago reader, to hold something they could have held, connecting not just mentally but physically to their era, a moment of connection across more than a century.

Excuse me while I go weep.

[ailabyuwu]

*cough* i mightve uh.... i mightve gotten too obsessed with @the-b1ah's AU and needed to draw danny (AND HIS SUPER DUPER CUTE JACKET LIKE OMG???? i want it so bad) bc i couldn't think of anything else jaskjdflasdfks;af

[lonelyzarquon]

Aubrey Plaza in Addicted to Fresno (2015)

[the-pupperrrrrrr]

I've been so so horny for men these past few days. I cannot stop daydreaming about being on my knees in front of one, drooling at the bulge in the pants in front of me. or getting bent over a desk or a table or anything and getting bred from the back like a man should be. or being tied up, gagged, blindfolded and distributed through a party full of frat boys and other horny men. you understand my struggles.

[yirima-chai]

some of the hand holding shots in unification

[theirwolfbicanthrope]

"If not you, another. Choose."

[samanthamulder]

TVARCHIVE'S TV APPRECIATION WEEK 2023 | DAY 5: lgbtq+ pride —Denise Bryson in Twin Peaks (1990, 2017) 🩵🩷🤍

[nanihirunkits]

#my cute aggression go brrrrrr 🤏🏻

[redbelles]

But plant your hope with good seeds Don't cover yourself with thistle and weeds Rain down, rain down on me I will hold on —Thistle & Weeds by Mumford & Sons

@hbowardaily summer 2024 exchange ⬩ for @rebeccapearson

[orengejoshi]

can't focus...

[anoant-haikyuu-dump]

The hyperfixation demons are screeching at me to write a comprehensive list of all the reasons I like Fukutora, so today I present to you "Ant ignores their responsibilites and spends several paragraphs explaining why Fukutora is peak despite them having roughly 10 seconds of shared screen time"

1. Contrasting Personalities In general their personalities fit together really well— Fukunaga barely speaks while Tora exclusively shouts at max volume and can't stfu to save his life, Tora's overly-intense and takes everything way too seriously while Fukunaga's cracking jokes in the middle of important games, they're even literal opposites on the court as the two wing spikers. Their differences compliment each other perfectly and because of that I think they'd grow a lot being together, Fukunaga would learn to open up and Tora would mellow out. Another good contrast is how Tora's all about looking cool and standing out while Fukunaga tends to blend into the background, which leads into my next point...

2. MY ROMAN EMPIRE (aka chapter 309) I know it's only two pages out of a 33 chapter match but i dont care, this scene makes me feral. I read the manga after watching Dumpster Battle, so imagine my suprise when my two favorite losers had a moment THAT GOT CUT FROM THE FUCJIGN MOVIE (I'm still salty, it should've been a full season).

Anyways these pages rooted their way into my brain because they show that even though Fukunaga goes unnoticed by most people (both in-universe and by readers) Tora realizes how great he is, and not only respects his play style but views him as a rival on the same level as himself. One thing I appreciate about Tora is that despite him being the stereotypical "strong manly athlete" type he doesn't think his methods are the best or only way of doing things; Fukunaga scoring points without "big fanfare" is just as cool as the shit he and Tanaka pull off. The phrasing "that I hafta surpass" could even imply that Tora sees Fukunaga as more than an equal, as someone who's ahead of him since he doesn't need to be flashy or loud to do amazing stuff.

Look at his smile on page two, bro's just excited to have someone who motivates him to keep pushing himself. And as we've learned from Kagehina: what's gayer than a rivalry?? All in all I think it's sweet that Tora notcies his efforts and admires him when few others do. Side Note, I've seen a translation of these that call them "Nekoma's Wings" and I think that's a sick nickname.

3. Bi Tora and Internalized Homophobia I love a good internalized homophobia arc, and characters like Tora that center so much around girls and manliness are some of the most fun to explore them with imo. You could say he's one of the least likely characters in hq to be queer since he's THE woman-lover next to Tanaka and Noya (and Yachi) but that's what makes it interesting—his gay awakening would hit like a tsunami and send him into life-ruining bi panic for months, especially since he's already such a mess when it comes to romance. He gives me the vibes of someone who has no problem with other people being gay but struggles when it comes to himself since it clashes with his conception of what it means to "be a man" or whatever. My point is he'd have the most intense no homo phase to grace this earth and I think that's both super funny and compelling for his character.

Also as a bi person myself it's kind of frustrating how bisexuality is treated online sometimes. It's annoying when a person's queerness is negated the moment they show attraction for the opposite gender, so headcanoning a character like Tora as a bi while still being openly into women makes me happy.

4. The Stage Play They're so silly in the stageplay. Why is he dragging him around by the feet? Why are they screaming at Kenma? Why is he constantly bopping him on the head in the background? WHY IS HE SERVING FACE IN THE PROMO PICTURES? So silly.

(Ignore how blurry these are lol) 5. Ant's Little Sister Bias This is a me thing, I like ships where one party has an annoying little sister who bothers them, sue me. Its cute. Akane and Fukunaga could have the most adorable friendship if you believe.

6. They Match Each Others Energy My first post about them was me rambling about this so just read that, TDLR they're both energetic menaces who match each other's freak.

7. Kenma's Forced Third-Wheel Purgatory Putting Kenma in a situation where Kuroo's graduated and his closest remaining friends are dating and constantly forcing him to third-wheel is just about the evilest thing you could do to the guy. He may be one of my favorites but this is well-deserved punishment for his crimes.

8. Baffled x Baffling Another ship dynamic I like a lot is when one person is unabashedly weird and the other thinks they're a total freak... but likes them anyways. They don't know why they like them. They can't explain it to anyone. Whenever the person does more weird shit they're like "why tf do I like you." But even so they're whipped as hell. Anyways Tora barely understands a single thing Fukunaga does and I think that makes for a funny crush to have.

9. Fukunaga's "Current Concern" Don't have much to add here, it's just proof to me that they hang out idc. Like why are you concerned about what he wants?? Kinda gay dude. Big fan of Fukunaga whispering to him and Tora answering at full volume so other people hear a one-sided conversation.

10. These Fics Before I knew this ship was even a thing I stumbled on these fics while browsing the Fukunaga tag, that's what got the gears turning:

• My favorite one, third-year shenanigans • Peak, need to be signed in tho • College AU • This one is mostly gen Fukunaga but the few moments they have are perfect (also really fun Nekoma interactions overall)

11. Other Miscellaneous Thoughts • Both of them being public figures/lowkey famous in timeskip is cute, like imagine them being each others' biggest fan before they make it big.

• Chef x guy who eats a lot is peak fiction. In this case they both eat a lot. Their grocery bill is a horror story.

• I know it's because characters are usually grouped by year and Kenma ditches them to sit with Kuroo but they're always together in the stands, pretty gay if you ask me

• I hc Fukunaga as genderfluid so Tora still gets his chance to be a wife guy. Him and Tanaka ranting to each other while Kiyoko and Fukunaga drink tea in peaceful silence.

• I think Fukunaga's the type to enjoy people watching and Tora's always doing something dumb. Observing him like a little bug under a microscope

• They're both so silly looking, cartoony ahh designs. I just think they'd make a funny couple visually, they're so square and stick to me if that makes any sense lmaoo

If you got through this whole post you're a real one, thanks for reading to my brain dump. I think about them every day and need more people to understand the vision

[nell0-0]

Linkle my beloved

[rainofthetwilight]

strength