#but as soon as you start talking about real life? i'm outta here

[moinsbienquekaworu]

Y'all don't need to know that but I found a very hot fic

[cerealmonster15]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

ty for the tag @unpredictable-probabilities! I don't usually do tag things but I'm feeling an exception today and I want to ramble lol let's GO!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Right now, 51! I think i started using ao3 back in college with rvb fic lol. I've since orphaned 2 fics so I guess there wouldve been 53.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

86,956

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Right now, mostly just Twisted Wonderland (and the occasional dndads, I still have a fic in my brain I kinda wanna write for that). Twst was kinda my comeback to wanting to write fics and has been my main inspiration for a lot of things and it's been the most fun i've had writing fics I think, and it's eventually what's gotten me to try to write my first multi chapter fic.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. Slip Ups and Lift Ups (Stardew Valley) 444 Kudos 2. A Fishy Intervention (TWST) 354 Kudos 3. Company (TWST) 249 Kudos 4. Security Cauldron (TWST) 248 Kudos [my first twst fic i think? also has some errors in it teehee oopsie] 5. Because I Care (TWST) 234 Kudos

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes!!! I think I didn't used to? Maybe because I felt weird about my own comments changing the comment count and like it was somehow lying lol. but that's silly and i like talking to people and I Need people to Know that i Love Their Comments

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hmmm I do not write much angst, and even when I do it's more hurt/comfort, bc permasads make ME permasad. I think it was my rvb fic "forgotten" - which i always forget was my first fic uploaded to ao3 LOL, back in 2015. ironic that my first wasnt reflective of the tone i usually write for. i don't wanna reread it to check [even tho my fics from back then are WAY shorter] bc im scared to face how i wrote when i was fresh outta hs lol BUT if i remember correctly/based on the summary, it was a doc/donut fic and I think it was about how after doc had disappeared from the future cube or whatever in canon and no one knew he was gone, i wrote a scene of doc getting upset with donut bc Of All People Why Didnt You Notice I Thought I Meant Something To You 😔 kdlsjfkdlsj i think it ended with doc walking off and donut being SAD and idk maybe they broke up, idr if they were 'officially dating' in the context of that fic. but um hashtag docnut for life.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

most all of my fics are happy endings with an exception of like one ^ or two lol. I don't know if i can quantify those!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not to my face if I do lol. I don't think enough people know about me to give a shit if i do stuff they dont like

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

nope!!!! i dont really like smut personally and it's not the kind of genre i have story ideas for.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I don't think i've ever done that 🤔

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that I know of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

not that I know of!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope!

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

girl help i cannot choose. um. well first shout out again to rvb's docnut bc u will always be strong and married in my heart. and in dndads im an oakworthy truther til i die BUT for twst. twst beloved twst i am in that pitfall of i like 50000 different ships. jamiazu is the one i write and draw the most LOL and theyre def a top fave HOWEVER. god. treycater alters my brain chemistry. rookvil marriage real. adeuce beloved fool duo for life. im physically restraining myself from mentioning more KLFJDSKLFJS especially when we get into the multiship/poly web bc god we will be here all day. i can and will be enabled but this post is already long enough GOODBYE!!!!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

oooh ok well there was a dndads oakworthy thing I started like last year but pretty soon after I started it, we started seeing more of hermies forbidden other 'true' personality traits and i was like ruh roh this guy keeps pulling a fast one on me, i dont think the direction i had with this fic is fitting anymore. i had barely gotten anywhere with it and it wouldve been short anyway, but i think about what couldve been.... lololol and then for TWST umm. Hehe. Teehee even. Back during nanowrimo I used that as time to start 2 fics: kalim and the great relationship rescue, which is my current multichap fic about kalisil and jamiazu, it’s got about 3 chapters, and I’m still writing it. AND IM STILL GOING TO FINISH THAT ONE!!! but the OTHER one I started during that time and have NOT posted any of it yet was the stuff with my first twst oc, Char, and his place in my big caterella multiverse ideas lol. I’ve posted a bit about that story idea and done a lot of doodles and brianstorming for it, but I fear it would be too intimidatingly ambitious to stick to and I’m not sure writing one concrete fic is the right medium for it 🤔 plus I just don’t think many people would like it much LOL it would be very self indulgent and tapping into my soap opera brain. I feel nervous when I talk about it HAHDBFNTG so I’m not sure I could commit. But I still have what I wrote, and maybe I’ll figure out another way to go with it or maybe I’ll just wake up one day and say WHATEVER and write it anyway lol. I’ve gotten shyer again so we’ll see 🧍

16. What are your writing strengths?

umm. i do not know if it is a strength but i feel more light comedy and dialogue come more 'naturally' to me, but i do not know how well i actually can pull it off LOL also shorter, contained stories. Everything I write is a one shot, and I’m struggling on my recent attempt at a multiple chapter fic BDBFFBFNGD

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

hrhrnrngm more descriptive writing, i find im in the pitfalls of writing TOO MUCH dialogue. and i also feel like when i try to do more serious tone things it comes off as cringe or trying too hard kFDKLSHFLDSJ. no one's said that to me but yknow. fear and whatnot. also ending the story is. Hard. I feel like that’s always a weak part of my fics bc I sit there like WELL I WROTE ALL MY IDEAS HOW DO I WRAP THIS UP…. I worry my endings come off kind of half assed but I do my best lol 😔✌️

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

like are you asking if i would do it? or how i feel when it's done in fics i read? i dunno lol. i could maybe do spanish bc ive studied it a lot but i'd get nervous i think.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

on ao3 it was rvb bu teeeechnically back in my neoseeker forums days i was in there writing like, animal crossing or harvest moon or pokemon stuff. it was very bad bc i was like 10 years old LOL

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

ohoho ummmm. Well I always have fun writing jamiazu and I’ve written a LOT of those lol. I have a soft spot for The Comfort of Familiarity. That’s one of the ones hats taken me the longest to write because I was really trying hard to handle it with care, as it was a less light tone than I typically do and I was trying to explore the characters and their situation in a particular way that I really wanted to come across well with who reads it. It was hard, and I’m not sure I fully got there, but ultimately I did like it quite a a bit. on the flipside, one of my more recent fics and I think now my longest oneshot to date, Blue Raspberry Mango was VERY fun to write lol. That one’s a lot more like what I typically write, silly romcom style lmao. Cater and Idia goofing, characters bickering, friendship, me trying to sneak in as many side ships into the background for funsies, jamiazu is there, it was a good time. And that one started as a prompt suggestion which I feel like often times I end up struggling with and not delivering super well… but this one ran away from me and I had a blast lol. Idikei fixed me 😌✌️

Ty for tagging me! Umm. I am too scared to tag other people 🧍 goodbye jk @officialgleamstar 🫵 You Do It

[sorry if I missed any typos or autocorrect, part of this was on my phone and I always miss SOMETHING lol]

[cookieswithay]

"Late night snacking" Actual fic😌

• Serious credits to @o0o0thorn0o0o She drew this lovely picture.

• Normal AU...really normal

•⚠️Spelling mistakes, swearing and American names. And a little suggestive talk at the end ⚠️

• (You guys can guess who's who by the names🤭)

°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°

• "Godammit, Issac, turn the light off already!"

• Hey, the names Issac Kennedy. I'm a college student and currently taking a writing class. And right now, I'm studying for a upcoming exam. With my irritating roommate "Ronnie" pestering me.

• (Ron/Ronnie: A tall fake redhead with a bunch of tattoos. Is (somehow) in all my classes and is on a basketball team)

• "Hell no, I'm not done studying." I snapped back. He's know my damn schedule. He scoffed.

• "Study some other night, the exam is next week"

• "Well if I'm keeping you from your bedtime, go sleep at your girlfriend's!" Silence. I snickered. Ronnie's still too "respectful" to sleep over at Rebecca's.

• (Rebecca: A tiny brunette who badgers me. Unlike Ronnie, she doesn't look her age. She takes the real estate class and is actually relationship with him)

• Now, that he was quiet, back to what I was doing.

• *Whack!*

• "Ow!" I heard laughing. I turned to see Ronnie standing up with a blanket. "Oh, sorry Issac," he said.

• "The pillow just happened to slip outta my hand."

• My jaw clenched. "You bastard." I muttered. He smiled and headed towards the door. "See ya, Issac." I scoffed. After waiting a few minutes for the pain wear off, I got back to my practice test.

°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•

• ~Rumble~

• Damn. As usual, my stomach's interrupting something important. I'm almost done. Maybe, I could...no, no. I sighed and pushed away from my desk. (Hunger pains are no joke) I looked around. Damn, I didn't swipe anything today? I sighed again and stood up. I hate going out at night.

• ~Little later~

• As I walked down the hallway, I started racking brain for eating options. I'm still busy, so I'm definitely not cooking anything. Snacks...did I go shopping recently? My question was answered when I didn't see my name on anything. "Godammit." What've I been doing lately!

• "Olivia!"

• I jumped.

• "Olivia!"

• Oh crap, it's Tessa.

• (Tessa: Yet another brunette in my life, except I actually like this one. She's a childhood friend who I happened to see again when I got here. She's also best friends with a girl named Olivia and is practicing to be a professional boxer)

• "Olivia, we have curfews y'know! We could get in trouble!"

• Geez, way to keep it on the down low. After what felt like a FOREVER, her voice finally walked away. Phew. Let's hope Liv shows herself soon. Tessa practically had smoke coming outta her ears. Anyway, what was I looking for-

• "Issac!"

• I stiffened.

• "Issac! Down here!"

• Oh wait, I know this voice. I bent down. Sure enough, it was the wanted ginger under the table. I smiled. "Hey, Olivia." Instead of saying "hi" back, she pulled me under. By the collar.

• "Oliv-?"

• She covered my mouth. "Shush, shush." What the hell!? Seconds later, she let me go. "Okay, Tessa's is gone." She sighed and straightened out her shirt.

• "So, what brings you out into the wild?"

• She said putting the spotlight on me. (The wild, huh? I'll play along) "Well, I came outta the cave, cause I got hungry."

• She nods. "That makes sense," She smiled.

• "I usually see you when you're hungry."

• "You see me in the hallway too."

• (Damn, have I really been that scarce?) She nodded, and...then we started staring at each other. I cleared my throat. "Anyway, what's got you hiding from Tessa?" This a good talking subject, right? Olivia perked up.

• "That's right!" She said.

• "Well, I took a super long nap earlier."

• Oh yeah, she did have a headache earlier.

• "So, when I woke up, I was super hungry. But it was night then. That's when I decided to sneak out."

• I chuckled. "And that's why Tessa's prowling?" She nodded. "She's worried about me." I snickered. I swear, I don't think I ever had a boring conversation with Olivia.

• (Olivia Ingle: A beautiful girl with pretty orange hair. I never really got the chance to speak to her high school, but we became friends here. As you know, she's friends with Tess. And is taking the culinary class. Even though she has a odd taste buds.)

• "Can we come up from under here, now?"

• I asked. Anywhere is great with her, but under the table is gross. "Oh yeah, of course." She replied. I lifted the tablecloth and she crawled out. I did the same.

• "Although, you should've said something earlier."

• "Why?"

• "Your stomach was growling earlier."

• Holy! Godda- Mother of- I inhaled. "Really?" She nodded. Someone please put me outta my misery.

• "It's alright though."

• "It is?" I thought outloud

• "It's usually super embarrassing. But if you're around nice people, no one will care!"

• She said, with a huge smile. I nodded. "Okay." I said, leaning on the counter. Now, Olivia's rooting through the pantry while humming.

• It got pretty quiet for awhile, until she called my name. "Yeah?"

• "You can have these."

• I looked down. In her hand, were shooting star cookies. I would've been touched if those weren't Tessa's. (She usually eats those on cheat days) "I'm good," Because...

• "I'm on a diet."

• She paused.

• Shit.

• "Are you sure?"

• Options: keep up the lie and starve or chow down and get beat up by Tessa later. Eh, I'll take the beat down. It's not everyday I get to talk to Olivia alone.

• "Alright, you caught me," I said, throwing up my hands. "I was bluffing." She smiled.

• "I thought so!" She set the cookies down and walked towards the fridge.

• She put the usual on the counter: Icecream, Oreos, milk, barbecue lays, etc. Although the chip difference stuck out to me.

• "Barbecue, this time?"

• (She used green onion last time)

• "Mm-hm." She said, while nodding.

• "Last time, the green onion chips overpowered the so- could you open this please? Thank you. And-"

• I listened closely as Olivia chatted on. (And opened the chip bag) To be completely honest, I love talking to her. Sometimes, I even think I'm learning new things about her. Like she's dropping subtle hints about herself. Olivia's so...perfect. (Damn, am I blushing?)

• "Olivia."

• "Yes?"

• "Can you tell me how to make special french toast again?"

• ~Later~

• After snacking, talking, and watching a cat video, I (finally) looked at the time. Damn, it's 12.

• "Liv."

• She looked back from the counter.

• "Liv?"

• Dammit, I said that outloud. "Olivia, Olivia, sorry," I stuttered. "It's midnight now. Anything else you gotta do?"

• "Oh boy,"

• She said with her usual nervous laugh. "I hope Tessa didn't round up a search party or anything."

• "No, but I'm glad I didn't."

• We both jumped. Tessa's here! In a instant, Olivia was in my arms. (And I didn't even grab her this time) She took a breath.

• "Jesus christ, Olivia! Where the heck were you!?"

• ~Yet another later~

• After getting scolded AND hit (we both did), we got sent to our rooms. Luckily, Tess was nice enough to let us walk together. "Damn," I grumbled. "Does she usually hit this hard?" I haven't been scolded by Tessa in awhile.

• "We actually got lucky." Olivia responded.

• "She held back because she was worried."

• She held back!? I feel like my head's bleeding. "Oh." I replied. "Good for us, I guess." After some more talking, we were at her room.

• "Well, this is my stop." She said, smiling again. "Tonight was fun," She said.

• "Even if we did get in trouble in the end." She said, with a shrug.

• "It wouldn't be the first time for us." I muttered. We nearly get screwed alot. Welp, better say bye-

• "Oh! I almost forgot!"

• Olivia said, running into her room. Uh... I peeked in.

• "Oliv- Ah!"

• "I got it!"

• She shouted, conveniently coming out right now. "Right here," She pulled me back on my feet. And gave me a pink flyer. "A sweet festival is happening on Melody road this saturday!" She said. "I asked my friends the other day but they all have plans,"

• ...Is she asking me out?

• "So I was wondering if maybe you wanted to come?"

• She is asking me out!

• I cleared my throat. Play it cool. "I gotta drop my sisters off at a friend's but,"

• Play it cool!

• "I'm free."

• Yes! She smiled, but turned it off. "Uh...Olivia?" She did a quick look around.

• "Tessa's still in the bathroom, right?"

• "Yeah?"

• "Okay, good."

• Before I could say anything else, she wrapped her arms my neck. And...kissed me. ACTUALLY kissed me! Not on my cheek, not on my top lip, a real life kiss! When she pulled away, she covered her mouth.

• "Um,"

• She looked down.

• "You still wanna go to festival, right?"

• "Yes!"

• Normally, I would've been embarrassed about the giddiness. But, I'm SO not thinking straight. Olivia blushed and started messing with her hair.

• "Okay, see you on Saturday!"

• She said, smiling. Then she just ran into her room. Oh my god. I was kissed! By Olivia! I can't wrap my head around this!

• "What's got you jazzed?"

• I jumped. I turned to see Ronnie behind me. "What the hell, Ronnie!? Don't sneak up on me like!" Jeez, I almost flew outta my skin. He frowned. "Oh get a grip, Issac,"

• "Just wondering where you were."

• I sighed.

• "I was just walking around."

• "At night?"

• "Yes."

• "But you don't like going anywhere."

• Classic Ronnie, asking a ton of personal questions. "No reason, alright." Can he just drop it? When I didn't hear another nosy question, I looked back at him. He was just...staring at me.

• "What?"

• He blinked.

• "You got kissed, didn't you?"

• Huh!?

• I scoffed. "I have no idea what your talking about!" He started laughing. "You did!" God frickin dammit.

• "I have a girlfriend, doofus. I know the symptoms like the back of my hand."

• "I don't have any symptoms!"

• "I wonder who did it...?"

• I'm not staying for this. I turned on my heels, and started down the hall. I could hear Ronnie cackling behind me. Asshole- wait a sec?

• "Since we're on the topic of women,"

• (This'll get him)

• "What happened with Rebecca?"

• He turned red. "Whaddya mean what happened?"

• (He's dodging the question now.😏) "You went to her room like 2 hours ago, why'd you leave?"

• "If you must know, nosy I had to pick up something."

• I snickered. "What? Condu-"

• "Issac!"

• Now it's my turn to laugh! "Am I right!?"

• Instead of answering, Ronnie turned me around and basically starting pushing back to our dorm. After poking fun at him a little more, I ended deciding to do the practice test tomorrow.

• (It's not like I'd be able to focus after tonight)

• So now I'm laying in my bed, wondering about my date... What am I gonna wear!?

•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°

Heyyyy! This took awhile for no reason! I was so lucky to find a ICHIHIME artist who didn't have a price tag on her art. Please check her out her art is lovely! @o0o0thorn0o0o As usual, stay cool.😎

The cute little models⬇️

[ase-trollplays]

When We Were Kids (Part One)

...s-so... how are you feeling?... ...s-still s-sore?...

Y'all got no idea. The only thing that don't hurt is blinkin'. I swear, soon as I can move again, I'm suplexin' Dan inta next sweep.

...he only picks on you because he cares... ...its his way of making s-sure you dont obsess over everything...

Ya mean like the fact I fucked myself an' can never have anythin' close ta a normal life ever again cuz I lost my fool head?

...yeah... that... ...im just relieved you werent killed... ...i... ...i was going insane thinking id have to bury another moirail...

I wouldn't be too relieved. I can't go out in public ever again with legis an' fleet dogs out fer my head. Prolly got a hefty bounty, too, an' rewards fer turnin' me in. Y'all two ain't safe either if anyone finds out y'all know me.

...yeah... ...when dantli comes back... we s-should all talk about where were going from here...

Ugh, I can't even get my shit from my hive. It's prolly bein' watched or somethin', or it's been raided an' bugged by now in case me'r one a y'all shows up. God, my lusus ain't gon' know what happened ta me, an' he can't come here like yers. I ain't sure he'll wait a sweep fer me ta come back like when I was a kid.

...that reminds me... ...when i was in the hospital... you s-said you knew exactly how i felt when i was being held captive... and that i s-should ask you about your childhood...

Yeh. Yeh, I did say that, didn't I? I'm guessin' this is yer way a askin'?

...yeah... if you dont mind...

Alright. It ain't a happy story, but I'm sure ya already figured that. I guess I'll start from the beginnin'.

I was even more a a hotheaded stubborn shit when I was a kid, if y'all can believe that. Pickin' fights with every troll I saw an' tryin' ta befriend the ones who beat me. Which was damn near all a them cuz fer all my bluster, I was a twiggy scrawny little toothpick, ain't had a ounce a muscle on me. I didn't want nobody thinkin' I was weak just cuz I was a skinny rust.

I was always gettin' my dumb ass beat up an' hurt tryin' ta prove I ain't no wimp, but I did get some good friends outta it. Even had a li'l flush crush on one a them, a girl who beat me in a fight just by knockin' me down an' sittin' on me 'til I wore myself out tryin' ta get her off. I had a whole group a friends back then. I can't tell ya what their names'r caste was, but we were a happy li'l group.

Here's the part where everythin' goes ta shit. When I was five, I was out patrollin' my li'l territory when I spotted a scraggly-lookin' teal prowlin' around. He was a adult an' a lot bigger'n me, but I challenged him all the same. He hauled off an' kicked me dead in the stomach an' told me ta get lost. If I was smart I'd a left it at that, but who said wrigglers are smart? I wasn't ready ta say I lost, so I picked myself up, grabbed a big ol' rock, an' chucked it square at the back a his head. Hit him so hard he started bleedin' an' staggered a good bit.

He looked back at me real mad at first, then he started smilin'. Said I had a lot a fight in me for a twiggy brat. I told him there's more where that came from if he don't git, an' he laughed an' said he'd have a ball breakin' me. 'Fore I knew it, he was right up on me, an' I didn't have no time ta react 'fore he got me in the gut with a stun gun an' knocked my ass right out.

I woke up in a cell with a couple other young trolls. I asked where I was, an' they said I was in the slave camp. Said I was here cuz they were gon' break me, train me inta a perfect li'l pet slave, then sell me off ta the highest bidder. Needless ta say, I wasn't havin' that shit. I made it my mission ta put up as much a a fight as I could an' refuse ta be domesticated.

First handler they assigned ta me was that teal that grabbed me. Since I already fought with him once, I knew what ta expect. He got a lotta good licks in over the first couple nights, but eventually he slipped up an' I was able ta steal his stun gun an' shock him dead in the eyes. After that, they decided to gimme their toughest, meanest, biggest handler.

He was a big blueblood who made us call him "Mister," an' he took that shit serious. I called him asshole exactly once an' he slapped me 'cross the face so hard he damn near snapped my neck. I couldn't feel my face fer a night afterward. Most a my abuse came from him, an' I just know he was havin' fun beatin' my ass every night tryin' ta make me give up.

But I'm the most stubborn bitch ever hatched, so I didn't make shit easy fer him. He beat me ta shit, starved me, locked me in a tiny li'l cage, an' made sure no one talked ta me'r tried helpin' me'r they'd be in the same boat. His favorite punishment fer me was the post. There was a big wooden post in a sort a courtyard outside with a pair a manacles attached. He'd lock me in, hike up my shirt, an' tear me ta ribbons with a whip. Afterwards, he'd leave me out there fer nights with only a thick blanket thrown over me ta keep me from bein' completely cooked ta death by the sun durin' the day.

He liked hearin' me cry an' scream in pain, so I'd try my damnedest to keep my mouth shut no matter how hard an' how much he whipped me. I'd stay quiet for the first thirty seconds, but after that I could never hold it in anymore. Then he'd whip me more fer resistin'. So many times I was close ta givin' up if it meant he wouldn't torture me no more, but I didn't wanna let him win.

...oh my god... ...im s-so s-sorry... ...i cant even imagine... and i s-said all that--

Y'ain't gotta apologize fer bein' mad. I get it. Ya were in a scary situation, an' hearin' that I never even tried ta find ya when this whole thing was my damn fault ta start with? I'd a been pissed, too.

...s-still though... ...it was s-so insensitive...

It ain't like y'all knew any a this at the time. It's fine.

...how did you get out??...

Heh, that's where shit gets real interestin'.

They kept me at that camp fer half a sweep torturin' me, but I held on. I dunno why they didn't just cull my stubborn ass a long time ago. My guess is cuz Mister wanted the satisfaction a breakin' me cuz ain't no one else been this much a a challenge fer him fer so long. If he let them cull me, it ain't a real win. But eventually he reached the end a his patience with me.

I managed ta get a hold a a fork an' taunted Mister 'til he grabbed me 'round the throat an' got right in my face ta threaten me. I stabbed him in the eye an' tried ta make a break fer the exit while he was screamin' an' cursin' an' bleedin'. A course, I didn't make it nowhere close ta the door 'fore I got caught. Mister was fumin' somethin' fierce, and I didn't even get a chance ta register what he was about ta do 'fore everythin' just became blindin' pain.

I remember one a the supervisors cussin' him out cuz they was plannin' on sendin' me ta The Pit, an' now I ain't in no condition ta be transferred. That fucker cut me open from rib ta hip with a dagger. I spent nights in the infirmary tryin' ta get stabilized an' patched up. I was so weak from bein' starved an' beat on a regular basis that I almost died.

But like I said, I'm the most stubborn bitch ever hatched. I was able ta recover enough ta get my stitches out, but after they they decided ta cut their losses and finally cull me. Mister wanted ta do the honors himself. After what I did ta him, he didn't care about winnin' no more. He wanted me dead. He filled a tub full a water, threw me in, an' held me down with his foot while I thrashed an' tried ta free myself 'fore I drowned. Eventually I lost consciousness.

I woke up chokin' on water an' hackin' the shit out my lungs in the middle a the forest. I figured they dumped my body fer the undead an' the animals ta eat once I blacked out. I didn't know where I was or how ta get back home, an' I was fuckin' scared. But I was free after half a sweep in captivity, an' that was more important than bein' afraid. I picked a direction an' started walkin'.

I didn't have no way a huntin' ta feed myself, an' I was still fuckin' weak as shit, so I didn't eat much a nothin' 'cept whatever bugs an' small animals I was able ta catch. I had ta sleep up in trees durin' the day ta avoid the roamin' undead. Eventually between the hunger an' bein' exhausted all the time, I dropped.

Next thing I know, I'm wakin' up in a hive belongin' ta some li'l jade even younger'n me sayin' him an' his lusus found me. I was still a ornery li'l shit an' wasn't exactly a good hiveguest. He still helped me an' everythin' though. Kept me fed, gave me a place ta sleep. Once I was mostly healed an' had my strength back, I robbed him blind an' ran. Took every piece an' scrap a food I could carry, stole a couple knives, an' I was off. I'd prolly apologize ta him if I ever see him again, not that I remember what he even looked like, an' I'm sure he don't remember me or wouldn't recognize me now.

I spent the next half sweep doin' whatever I could ta survive an' try ta find my way home. I stole, I killed, I broke inta hives, I did whatever I had ta do ta make it ta the next night. When I finally made it hive after that half a sweep, my pa was there waitin' fer me. He waited fer a whole sweep fer me ta come back instead a takin' in a new charge. I bawled the hardest I ever have in my life. Makes me feel extra shitty that I can't go back an' say my goodbyes ta him. He's prolly still waitin' fer me ta come back just like I did last time I went missin'.

...if you want... i can ask dantli to go to your hive and tell your lusus you arent coming back... ...i dont think hes on anyones radar s-since he doesnt s-socialize... ...i can tell him to make it look like he's robbing you s-so they dont get s-suspicious... and itll be a convenient way to get s-some of your things for you...

That ain't a bad idea. S'long as he don't say nothin' stupid'r incriminatin', that could work.

Anyway, speakin' a going back hive, when I finally made it back ta mine after my sweep in Hell, I couldn't function fer shit. I didn't wanna reach out ta my friends cuz I didn't want 'em ta see how broken I was. I didn't wanna look weak ta them, an' none a them reached out anyhow. In just that one sweep, they moved on from me, which still kinda hurts ta know that's all it took ta lose 'em.

Fer perigees after, I'd have daymares a bein' back at the slave camp, weak an' in pain with Mister standin' over me with the whip, then draggin' me out ta the post. I was barely gettin' any sleep, I couldn't eat, an' I was terrified a bein' in water. That's when I decided ta start bulkin' up an' gettin' stronger so I couldn't be taken back there or anywhere else.

Fer three sweeps, I had the mother grub a anxiety. A lotta nights, I couldn't even get the nerve ta leave my hive. I'd get anxiety attacks an' panic attacks when I saw highbloods, 'specially male blues. An' y'all know me. When I start gettin' anxious, I get real mad an' itchin' fer a fight. Even now, I don't hate highblood s'much as I get anxiety bein' around 'em. An' I do also hate 'em.

That's when I started drinkin'. It wasn't about gettin' drunk. It was a way ta calm my frazzled nerves an' keep my anxiety under control. Over time, though, it turned inta a addiction, an' y'all know how well that ended up workin' out fer me in the end.

That's basically everythin' about my childhood, so believe me when I say I know exactly what it's like ta not know if yer gonna live ta see another night, an' cryin' yerself ta sleep durin' the day cuz everythin's so awful, an' prayin' that yer loved ones ain't next or won't be too tore up if ya don't survive.

...i... im s-so s-sorry... ...no one s-should have to endure that... especially not a child... ...i... i...

C'mon now, y'ain't gotta cry about it. It sucks, but it's in the past now, an' fallin' ta pieces over it ain't gon' fix nothin'.

...i... i know... but...

It's okay, I get it. If it'll make ya feel better, go ahead an' cry it out. I can hold ya if ya want.

...but arent you s-still sore?...

Not so sore I can't comfort my pale. It ain't gon' kill me, so get yer li'l cryin' sniffly self over here.

[oh-my-damn]

Wow. You're sure putting in a lot of time and effort into a man you claim not to like. A normal person, with a normal, rational brain, would simply walk away and pay him no mind. Say you're jealous and go because girlie, it's embarrassing as fuck and so many blogs on here laugh at you behind the scenes. There's a whole ass group chat dedicated to just laughing at you and your friend's nonsense. That's how embarrassing you, and your friends, are. ///

Okay. Here we go.

First: this is absolutely not about jealousy. Bringing up problematic behavior and people needs to happen. Here’s the best part: you don’t like what’s being said, so you probably are part of the fucking problem.

@oh-my-damn has done nothing but listen and share experiences POC, myself included, have had with this, and why our feelings are the way they are. We may not agree on real or PR, but that doesn’t affect shit between us because we are fucking adults who can have grown ass conversations.

What she’s done, just by listening and not speaking over POC voices and experiences is way more than other mods on here have done. She posts the food and the bad. And if you’re uncomfortable with that, you’re part of the fucking problem.

Do you really think she nor anyone else who is friends with her actually care that there’s a ducking group chat made just to talk shit? No. Wanna know why? You probably don’t, but I’m still going to tell you.

It’s because she and her friends address the shit talking head on. There are no passive aggressive posts or asks, they don’t need to go on anon to say their piece. They talk about it to and in front of the people that cause the fucking issues in this fandom. Creating a group just to shit talk cause you’re too fucking scared or hypocritical to actually say it outright is being a fucking coward and a child.

Run back to your fucking group chat. You belong there. And trust, that’s not a good thing. Get the fuck on and outta here with this bullshit

Listen. Y'all can make as many group chats about me as you fucking want. Y'all can even try to blame me for doxxing, or talking shit, or being jealous, or being a hater, or whatever the fuck you want.

At the end of the day, I'm here doing me. I'm living my fucking life, I come on here when I have time, but otherwise I go to Law School (yes, you read that right. Keep that in mind next time you want to harrass, honeys. Oh, and that's not even my first degree. It is my second one. So yeah, come suck my dick), I write occasionally about characters or storylines that intrigue me, and I talk to my friends (and also people who are more than friends but I digress), and SOMETIMES I speak about topics that MATTER. They matter to a lot of people and they SHOULD matter to you. And the reason they probably don't, is because you're a bigoted racist. There, I said it.

Fucking hell. Make that fucking group chat. I hope you even put my pfp as your fucking cover photo. I hope you name it "Mandy's Hate Squad". I hope you talk about me all day.

ALL DAY. TALK ABOUT ME ALL DAY.

I am proud that I, little old me who started a blog without even knowing how to fucking use tumblr, am on your mind enough that you NEED A WHOLE ENTIRE CHAT TO DISCUSS ME AND WHAT I DO.

God. What an honor.

I will be handing out headshots and autographs soon.

Stay tuned for my con dates!

And @adulting-sucks? I love you. Thank you for being you, always ❤️

Oh, and I also want to add... That this entire ask from the original anon was created to, once again, DEFLECT. from the REAL ISSUES. Because that's what the Defenders do. They are apologists of REAL SHIT THAT SHOULD NOT BE EXCUSED. LIKE RACISM. AND ANTI-SEMITISM. AND FATPHOBIA.

I am sure they don't understand what it means when people start excusing that kind of shit. But luckily a lot of us do.

So fuck them.

Come suck my big sweaty balls you losers 🥰😘

[demcnsinmymind]

"Well thank fuck for that" he says with a nervous laugh, because when the usual cycle of shifting and changing doesn't happen the way he's used to, he's getting his confirmation all over again. Not the real deal. Thank fuck indeed. The smile she meets him with helps even more. Because Jesus. That smile. Drags one right out of him by default, too.

"Used to be mine, too" he admits, looking back at the hallway, whose ceiling has once again been replaced with that void again. A never-ending vortex of darkness and chaos. He keeps looking up at it, afraid, yet brave at the same time. Defiant. That spark. Which is a lot easier to keep alight now, not just because this time he isn't alone, but also because he's somewhere else. Somewhere fake. That makes it easier.

"For nine months, two days and 22 hours" he shares a little more, getting lost in that sight. But then she's squeezing his hand again, pulling him right out of the memories.

"Judging from everything you've told me about the guy, he's pretty much on par with Azathoth. And that elephant's still in the room. It is gone right now. I don't know why. Or who even could pull it out. Considering it doesn't want to leave me alone" he reminds her, turning so he can properly face her. " But I get it. Just standing around talking and wondering what they're up to isn't gonna do shit. You're right. Let's just keep going" Lance goes on with a deep breath, eyes fixating on the door now. Gathering up the courage to open it, walk right on. Which he is going to do. He just needs a second. Phew.

"You know, as soon as we get outta here, you've got to teach me a few things. I'm tired of needing you to kill everything and do all the heavy lifting. I'm tired of shitheads constantly thinking they can trap me, just because I can't shoot or fight for shit. I need to kick some asses, too. Because seriously, this shit's gotta stop."

Ah. But here she is again though. Giving him that smile again. Being so ready to step through that door, go in guns blazing if she must. Her element, her call, her contract, her life. And all the reassurances. The reminder of just how many shady locations they've visited by now. Just for the heck of it. And how they always come out up top. Shitty as the current situation is. Maybe he doesn't want it to stop. Maybe it is some fucked up thrill that he'll always end up needing more of. Because what else is there to do now that he has nothing left? Fuck.

He leans into her touch on his cheek for a moment, inhaling and closing his eyes, then slowly exhaling. Gathering his courage and strength, remembering that what she's actually saying with this is what got him through all of it in the first place. Keep walking straight. When he opens his eyes back up again, he places his hand on hers so he can squeeze it, then pull it down. Then, with a determined nod, he starts walking towards the door and opens it without hesitation.

"Alright. Fuck it. Let's go explore then. Hello limbo" he says, maybe even a bit excited....until it comes into view. Another corridor. The same droning sound. The same creepy darkness. The same wall color, the same tiles, the same fucky ceiling. The same fucking corridor. Collingwood, revisited it is for now.

"Wow. A door with an exit sign that leads to another corridor. How very original. I'm so surprised and shocked. Whatever shall I do." Surprisingly, it's starting to just annoy him instead of scare him, the way it did initially. Inconvenience him since it's nothing new anymore now. He keeps walking and yep, he starts talking to this fucking thing, too. "Don't think I'm not gonna figure the shit out of you, too, because I will, motherfucker. You just watch me. I've had it with things like you. I am so done."

     While distressed, Lance isn’t frightened to the point of being frozen, which makes this all a lot easier than if she had to drag him around with her. He seems more than capable and willing to get up and get out of the room they’re in, look around at their surroundings with a much more discerning eye than her, even as it reduces him to shivers. To her it’s just another dark building, another maddening maze crafted by Limbo, but there’s recognition in his eyes and the way he grips her hand like a lifeline pretty much answers her question before he does. She regards him seriously, squeezes his hand while he touches the wall. Nevermind being forcefully dragged into Limbo, he has his past to face on top of that.

     "Limbo never gets thinks exactly right. It looks inside you but it still can’t recreate things exactly as you remember them. So it makes sense for things to be different. We’re not actually there.“ Ebony explains it to him calmly like it’s fact, but some if it is little more but strong suspicion. Still, he’d be hard pressed to find someone more knowledgeable than her, so she should give him something to hold on to, reasons to trust her to get him out of this — because she will.

     He looks to her for answers, so she smiles tightly and tries to seem unbothered. The building holds no significance or power over her, but Lance’s feelings do. "Yeah, Lance. I can see all of it. Limbo can look into your mind, but it can’t influence it. It’s just using what it sees to change the landscape. It’ll probably continue to change. Limbo already does that, and if Collingwood did that too then I doubt that’ll be different. It’s okay, I’m used to it. It’s my everyday.” She squeezes his hand again, the other stuffing Ivory back inside her jacket so she can lay it firm against his chest, reassuring.

     "Mundus isn’t here, I can tell, so what he wants doesn’t matter. We don’t even know if he caused this. I do think we should… explore.“ She looks back to the door he pointed out, considering it. "Like it or not, we’re trapped for now. I can’t pull us back out. Whenever that happens it means there’s something around that needs killing, or if I’m lucky I find a rift and get out without fighting. Either way, the solution isn’t going to come to us on its own.”

     She steps in front of Lance, between him and the door, and smiles up at him more genuinely. “It fucking sucks, but we’ll have to look around. We’ve explored plenty of dark, grimy buildings together, Lance, we’ll be fine. If something comes for us, I’ll feel it.” Ebony lifts her hand off his chest to press it against the curve of his jaw, the touch unnaturally warm against his skin. “I’ve got you. The door’s as good a place as any to start.”

[kayhi808]

More Than Our Scars - Part 6

Appointments with Dr. Krista Dumont was scheduled by Anvil's insurance company. You can't have an active agent that's mentally unstable, let alone the CEO. At first, meetings with Dr. Dumont were helpful. She taught Bill how to deal with his anxiety. How to deal with his scars.  The old Bill was a vain man. Suits fit perfectly. He kept his body in top shape, hair styled just so, neatly trimmed beard. He was extremely handsome. A failed mission, amnesia, injuries, irreparable facial scarring does a lot to a man's self-esteem & self worth. Lately, she has been asking more about details of the mission itself & what he can remember. Bill has a gut feeling that these weren't normal evaluation questions.

Curiosity got the better of her, "What happened to your hand?"

Bill flexes his fingers & smiles down at his bandaged hand, "Rabid puppy bite."

"You got a pet?" He shrugs but says nothing. "Your scars are healing very nicely." Dr Dumont studies his face & it annoys Bill. "You're almost 6 months into your recovery, Bill. You've achieved a lot in a very short time."

"Wiping my own ass again. That was a real milestone," knee bouncing as he stares at the ceiling of her office.

"We've talked about this. Be kind to yourself. Hang in there."

She rests her hand on Bill's, but before he can pull away, his phone rings. He see's its you calling him, so he gets up and moves away from Dumont. "Hey. (Pause) Nah, I'm finishing up. We started late. I'll get outta here soon. Were you calling for something? (Pause) I can pick it up on the way home. I'll see you in a bit." He shoves his phone back in his pocket. "Are we through here?"

"Bill, you need to take this seriously & participate," irritated because of the interruption or his lack of engagement, Bill couldn't tell. "Your snide comments are not helping you." Nods at his phone, "Who were you talking to?"

"Nobody," slouching down in his chair.

"I ask because you seem very comfortable. Your guard wasn't up. I haven't seen you like that."

"Yea, well. They don't pry & prod at me."

"Is that  how you feel about our sessions?"

Bill emits a soft growl & stands, "I think our hour is up. Thanks, Doc." He gives a lazy salute & leaves the office.

*****

After the debacle that happened in the lobby of Anvil, Billy was able to calm you down & reassure you that he had zero intention of letting any harm come to you. He had a medic over to wrap your ribs to prevent any more damage & to clean the bite you left on his hand. Luckily, no stitches were needed, yet you were filled with remorse. You believe Bill when he promises that he'll make Kingpin pay with his life. You have mixed feelings about that. You've prayed for Fisk's demise, but you don't want a death on Billy's conscience. Unbeknownst to you, your new roommate is a US Marine Corp Scout Sniper with 137 confirmed kills to his name.

Bill comes through the door with arms loaded down with groceries. You walk over "Here, let me help you."

"I got it," giving you an insulted look & angling the bags out of your reach. You follow him into the kitchen.

"Did you have to wait? They were supposed to have everything ready for pick up, " you ask nervously.

Dumping the bags on the counter, "Everything was set. What the hell did you buy?" He see's you tense, "Not that I care. I said you could buy what you needed."

"You lived quite the bachelor life. You don't even have the basics in your pantry. I had to restock."

"You don't need to do this, I'm fine with picking up food."

"I don't mind at all. I enjoy cooking. I used to be a chef before...before," you trail off. You busy yourself with putting things away. Billy gently tugs on your hair as you walk away. He follows & puts things on the higher shelves you can't reach without hurting your ribs.

"So what's on the menu for tonight?"

"You look like a steak & potatoes kind of guy. I figure that was a safe bet until you tell me what you like." Bill breaks into a grin, so you probably guessed right. "I'm sorry too that I interrupted your session with your doctor. I didn't mean to . I didn't want you to return only to go back out again. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I was done. It's too much talking for me."

You smile to yourself because you're not surprised to hear that, "Man of few words." You turn around from the cupboard to find Billy directly behind you, intruding in your personal space, "Shit," the smile falling from your lips.

Billy slowly leans over & brushes his lips across your cheek to whisper in your ear, "I don't always need words to convey what I want." The low almost rumble-like tone makes you break out in goosebumps, your nipples pebbling to aching buds beneath your shirt just by his voice alone. He pulls back slowly & his goatee tickles your neck. You can't help but stare. He smirks & cocks an eyebrow at you. You nod & he buries his hands in your hair & his mouth slants over yours. He hasn't kissed you since that night in his office. You almost thought it was a dream. But this is real. The smell of him. His taste. The way he feels against you. This was all Billy Russo. Your tongue slides against his & he leans into you, pressing his erection against your belly. You moan into his mouth & his kisses become more devouring. He slides his hands under your shirt & stops kissing you. He takes in a ragged breath & rests his head on the top of yours & pulls you to his chest, with his arm hugging you around your shoulders & neck.

"Wh...what's wrong? Why...did you stop?"

His hands glide along your shirt over your ribs. They are still tightly wrapped. "You're still healing. I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't hurt me." He smiles at you.

"Take a deep breath for me." You can't, because it'll be very painful. You were just in a kiss drunken haze created by Mr. Russo. You want him.

"Maybe if you were really gentle..."

Laughs harshly, "If I...WHEN I  fuck you, I'm going to be far from gentle, sweetheart."  He tilts your chin up and kisses you. “Never say I wasn’t a gentleman.”  Groans, "I need a cold shower."

“I hate you.”

“Soon, darlin’“

“I’m burning your dinner. You’re getting a well-done steak.”

You hear a true laugh from him & minutes later you hear the shower running.

A smile creeps onto your face. He didn’t say IF. He said WHEN.

@idaofinfinity @e-dubbc11 @jvanilly

[buddiebuckley-diaz]

So here’s the list of my fav 911 quotes. I have it divided into seasons but sometimes the seasons blur together after watching them 100 times like I have so some quotes might be in the wrong season, if you notice this let me know!! Also if you have any other amazing quotes from the show PLEASE reply/reblog with them, I always love seeing great quotes from the show! (I also ah e not added any from the last couple episodes yet)

Season 1

When we take the uniform off at the end of the day, it symbolizes letting go of all the sad, crazy, inhumane things we've seen that day. -Athena

You never go beyond the glass doors. -Buck

He broke up with me, and he did not have my permission. -Abby

Sometimes the right kind of no is better than the wrong kind of yes. -Abby

I get to be the tough guy, but I also get to help people. -Buck

My family is everything to me. And there ain't no trouble from the inside, or evil from the outside that's going to tear it apart. -Athena

No one is good when it's personal. -Buck

Karma is a wild animal... And she won't be caged! -Hen

Season 2

Okay. You. You're my problem. - Buck

You can have my back any day. -Eddie

You wanted us to bond, we might end up real close. -Buck

We all feel pressure, but it's how we respond that matters. Pressure doesn't have to break us down. It can show us who we really are. -Maddie

The point is you can't trust people, only yourself. -Josh

My father's from Mexico. My mother's Swedish. I can help you out with the Swedish half but no one told me which half that is. -Eddie

Yeah but it's hard to know though right? If you're hanging on too long or giving up too soon. -Buck

We’re not the story. We’re just here to make sure no story ends before it should. -Buck

So maybe the greatest love stories aren't the ones that end in tragedies. Maybe they're the ones that start with a second chance. -Maddie

Standing in between you and anyone who thinks they can hurt you is exactly where I want to be standing. -Buck

Here's how you make it to the end of the day. You don't worry about the things that you can't do anything about. -Bobby

You want to be a hero, be the one who lives to tell the tale. -Athena

I'm real. You're real. We can be real together. -Athena

You don't find it, son. You make it. -Old Guy

Our parent's approval is something that we all crave. We just can't let it stop us from doing the right thing. -Athena

Don't be afraid to run. Be afraid to stay. -Officer

Life moves pretty fast, if you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. -Chimney

Yeah, but this time he only got stabbed. -Hen

You want to be punished? Your punishment is that you lived. Now make it worth a damn. -Phil

I spent years not having a voice, and now that I do, it just feels like what I'm saying doesn't matter. -Maddie

You're a fool. But I love you, too. -Athena

Season 3

Where did all the water go? -Christopher

Buck, there's nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you. -Eddie

A few choice words can sometimes be the life raft that gets you home. To be seen… to be found… isn’t that what we’re all searching for? -Buck

I learned one thing from that tsunami; it's that I don't quit. I fight. -Buck

They’re my family, there’s nothing stronger than family. -Buck

You want me to watch Christopher? -Buck

It’s easy, he’s not very fast. -Eddie

Maybe try going to the zoo this time, something inland. -Eddie

Out there in this world, helping people, that is where I belong. -Buck

Because you’re exhausting, we all have our own problems but you don’t see us whining about it. You know somehow we just manage to suck it up. Why can’t you? -Eddie

You know how much Christopher misses you? How could you? You’re not around. -Eddie

No, it prevents me from reaching out to you! I couldn’t even call you to bail me outta jail… If that was something that happened. -Eddie

You know, Buck, someday you're gonna figure out when to stop pushing and learn some patience. I hope we're both alive to see it. -Bobby

I just want you to talk to me. Even if it's just to say that you're still mad. -Buck

There's no one right way to deal with trauma. -Frank

I killed someone I used to love. I will never be completely free of that. -Maddie

I get taking things slow. But tomorrow isn't promised to anyone. So if you love her, tell her. -Eddie

People make mistakes. Doesn’t mean you give up on ‘em. -Buck

Love me anyway! -Buck

You can’t save someone from themselves. Not if they don’t want it -Buck

Look I’m sorry I wasn’t there Eddie. You and Chris needed me and I had my head so far up my behind with that stupid lawsuit. -Buck

We’re way past that Buck. -Eddie

I’m not! -Buck

I should’ve been there. -Buck

I could’ve told you not to buy that truck. -Buck

Yeah you’d have talked me into buying something more expensive. -Eddie

At least be honest with me. -Buck

You don’t think, while you were going through your phase, just maybe you were throwing your punches at the wrong guy? -Buck

I’d still take you… wanna go for the title? -Buck

No matter what happens, I'm always gonna fight to come home to my family. -Eddie

You're always the one who leaves. You don't know what it's like to watch someone you love walk away. -Buck

But the thing about bad news. You never see it coming. -Bobby

Look, this moment is about you. It's not about what you're supposed to say. It should come from your heart. -Maddie

Season 4

So, let's try being scared together. -Chimney

You never give up. That's what being Buck means to me. But whatever you do, don't stop. -Athena

I have walked through fire every single day of my life because of you. -Buck

Nothing I ever did was good enough! -Buck

I have spent my entire life feeling like a constant disappointment. And you wanna talk about our jobs? You think my job is dangerous. I have walked through fire every single day of my life because of you. That is why I am in therapy because nothing I ever did was good enough! -Buck

You're allowed to give yourself some time, you know. To process. -Eddie

It's like the universe is screaming at you and you refuse to listen. -Buck

The universe does not scream. -Eddie

I know what it's like to be stuck inside the worst moment of your life. To be afraid to hope. To try again. -Bobby

Guess everyone has their breaking point. -Buck

Sometimes being lost is not knowing how to get from where we are to where we wanna be, where we need to be. -Buck

I am exactly like that woman. The day I forget that, that will be a very dangerous day. -Bobby

Hold on Eds -Buck

I need you to hold on. -Buck

You ok Buckley? -Captain Mehta

No. -Buck

I was just the guy standing there when it happened, who couldn’t do anything to protect him. -Buck

Still, I think it might have been better for him if I was the one who got shot. -Buck

Because, Evan, you came in here the other day and you said you thought it would have been better if it had been you who was shot. You act like you’re expendable… but you’re wrong. -Eddie

It's in my will, if I die, you become Christopher's legal guardian. -Eddie

That’s what the 118 is, the family we choose. -Eddie

Season 5

Let this be a lesson. Never give Buck a clipboard. Never. -Chimney

Stay focused. You get distracted and people die. -Buck

You just need to learn how to stand your ground. Bullies don't back down unless you make them. -Harry

Because you don't talk to the women you're dating. You just go with the flow and find yourself in a relationship, with no idea how you got there and what to do when things start to go wrong. -Bobby

You know me. I don't always listen. -Buck

You could be dead next year! -Chris

Buck, you need to move on. I have. -Eddie

I got out of the ocean for you. For both of you. But I had to stay here to learn to stop running. -Maddie

What are you afraid of? -Buck

That I’m never gonna feel normal again. -Eddie

I wonder how many other people we inadvertently saved by saving someone else. -Hen

This is Firefighter Eddie Diaz. Metro dispatch is on fire. -Eddie

And I don't want to keep on making the same mistakes. -Buck

Shouldn't it be when you're at your worst, they're at their worst, you have every reason to give up and you still decide you want to try again. -Buck

Season 6

Buck, you don't even have a couch. -Chris

Maybe I don’t want to pick the wrong couch again. -Buck

You're a great firefighter. When you're all in, nobody goes harder than you. -Bobby

Are you capable of being a father and walking away? -Hen

It’s 5 o’clock somewhere. -Buck

Buck! Where the hell are you going? -Eddie

[dameronology]

a matter of time (tasm! peter parker) - 4/5

four: til forever falls apart

summary: peter parker has barely gotten over losing you and getting dragged into another universe where you’re still alive and kicking isn’t about to help the case. thanks to an ultimatum from stephen strange, peter has just a matter of days to make you realise who he is and what you had, or he faces losing you all over again. he better get to work. (playlist + masterlist) - this uses she/her pronouns

warnings; mentions of loss/death, swearing, no way home spoilers,

has this been proof read? like fuck has this been proof read. also apologies for how long this took to write, i girl-bossed a bit too close to the sun with work and uni among other general life shit and i officially burnt out. hope you enjoy <3

- jazz xx

The last twenty-four hours didn’t feel real.

You couldn’t shake the feelings, now more than ever, as you were perched on top of the remains of the Statue of Liberty. There had been too many near misses and the fact your life had been one of them didn’t sit comfortably with Peter Parker. He hadn’t taken his arms off of you in the entire time since the fight had ended and now you were all just stood, catching your breath and getting your head around how fucking whack everything had been. You had one hand on his back and the other on his chest, leaning against his side for support. Nearly falling to your death sure had taken it outta you.

Peter One and Two were a little across the way from you; the latter had a knife wound in his abdomen, which you couldn’t imagine was all that comfortable.

"I should go talk to Strange," you quietly said. "And you should go help your brother."

"Yeah, you're right," Peter peered down at you, brown easy creased with a slight smile. "Don't do anything stupid, though. We need him on our side."

"What stupid thing would I do?"

"You've already tried to deck him," he reminded you.

"Oh yeah," you rolled your eyes. "That."

"Go," he gave you a light shove. "I'll see you in a minute."

Giving Peter one last smile, you gave his arm a light squeeze and headed down the scaffolding to where Strange was stood. He was trying to catch his breath, brow creased as he bent over. Messes like this were the reason he swore never to have children.

You could recognise his stress but damn. That didn't mean he hadn't hurt you - above being your colleague, he was your friend. A friend that had spent hours listening to you open up about how lost you sometimes felt; about how you felt like there was something missing from your being. And he'd known why this entire time. Some friend that was.

"Strange!" you called. "We need to talk."

"Not if you're going to attack me again-"

"- get the hell off your high horse," you cut him off. "How long have you known that I'm not from this universe?"

His gaze averted, before falling to the ground.

"Stephen," you urged. "I'm not mad, okay? I'm just...I'm hurt that you never told me. I care about you and I know you care about me too and all this shit will go away as soon as you tell me the truth."

"Fine," he swallowed. "It wasn't long after we met at that MIT lecture - there was something off about you. I searched public records for your birth certificate and social security. Nothing for your family. Then you started spouting all this wisdom about multiverses and it clicked in my head."

"That's a long time to know and not tell me," you murmured. "

"I know," he admitted. "I'm genuinely sorry. I didn't think you'd ever remember."

"I want to go back, Stephen," you replied. "I need to go back. My life isn't here."

"You've seen what opening the multiverse does," he half-snorted. "All of this is just the tip of the iceberg. Sending you back would be a disaster. It's a big ask-"

"- I wasn't asking," you took a step forward. "I am telling you now, Stephen Strange, that I am going back. I don't care if I have your support or not that but it's gonna be a hell of a lot easier if I do."

"Is that a threat?"

"Fuck yes it's a threat," you snapped. "I had everything ripped away from me and I finally have it back. I'm not gonna let middle aged man with a shit goatee-"

"- woah, woah, woah!" you felt a pair of hands grab you from behind. Peter, of course. "What happened to playing nice?"

"Fine," you muttered. "You deal with it then."

For Peter, handling your bloody-minded tendencies after five long years was like a breath of fresh air. He'd missed every part of you, including this one. You were never difficult, just...stubborn. And it was one of the things he loved most about you. No matter how hard things got, you always stood your ground, even against a fucking wizard. Especially against a fucking wizard.

You took a step back, dramatically ushering for Peter to take your place in the conversation. Man, it really was like no time had passed.

"Mr Strange," Peter began. "I can only assume that you've lost people you've love, right?"

"That's none of your business-"

"- you're right," he cut him off. "You're absolutely right but for the sake of my argument, I'm gonna have to over-step here, okay? I can't physically describe how it felt to lose that pain in the ass right over there so I'm just trying to appeal to your humanity and hope you can empathise with me."

"Go on."

"I've gone the last five years feeling like half a person," Peter continued. "Like I've got one leg and one arm and half a heart. I was beginning to forget what she looked like, and the sound of her laugh, and that voice and...you know what that's like, don't you? Beginning to forget the face of the person you love most in the world?"

"You're asking a lot of personal questions, Parker."

He gave Strange a lopsided smile. "I know - but imagine you could get the person you lost back. Imagine they were right there, and someone was trying to stop you."

Stephen faltered slightly at that.

The entire conversation was a perfect metaphor for the wider image of you and Peter. You'd gone in all guns blazing, stubborn and mighty and ready to fight. And he'd stopped you - without invalidating you - and tried a more grounded approach. Sometimes your way of things worked and other times, his was a little better. It was a nice balance.

Christine Palmer's face was the forefront of Strange's mind right then. He would have given up everything he had - the magic, his doctorate, his money - for a do-over with her. Hell, he'd give it all up for a chance to just apologise.

That was the stark difference between the two relationships: Peter had nothing inherently to apologise for. He'd never been arrogant or obsessed with himself; he'd never let your wellbeing slip his mind and you had always, always been his main priority.

Stephen swallowed, nodding slightly. "I might be able to send you back."

"Are you serious?" you grabbed Peter's arm, eyes widening.

"I said might," he reminded you. "You said you had most of your memories but if I'm going to send you back, you need all of the important ones."

"Which ones?" you asked.

"The fundamentals; where you lived, how you lived, how you died," he explained. "The latter is the most essential. Without it, history will just repeat itself, the same way it would have if we'd sent Osbourne and Octavius back to their world still damaged."

"Well that's not hard," you shrugged. "How did I die?"

Stephen's eyes flickered over to Peter. He knew. Of course he knew.

"Guys," you pushed. "How did I die?"

"You got your other memories back by triggering a familiar moment in your brain," Stephen explained. "That might be worth a try again."

Somehow, you got the feeling he was talking to Peter more than he was to you.

--

"Pete, why are we at some random rooftop?"

Peter was a few meters ahead of you, mask in his hand and feet dragging along the floor.

He was scared to be here again - in fact, he had never returned to the damn place since you'd fallen five years ago. He hadn't even gone back to this block. It held too many bad memories for him. Even with you right there beside him, alive and well, his heart was pounding in his chest, blood pumping loudly in his ears. It went on and on, never ending and constantly making him ache, the same way that vision of you falling had repeated in his mind in the months after your death.

But, if he wanted to keep you, Peter had to make you remember. As Strange had explained, even if they both told you how and when you died, history was doomed to repeat itself unless you had the memory. All this timekeeping shit was confusing.

"Peter!" you called after him.

"This is where you died," Peter spun around to face you.

Your brow furrowed. "What happened?"

"You have to try and remember," he grabbed your shoulders, forcing you to take a few steps towards the edge. "And god, I hope you don't hate me when you do."

"I could never hate you," you glanced up at him. "Hell, you could have pushed me off this damn thing and I wouldn't-"

- you froze.

The same cold feeling washed over you. It was like something hitting you in the chest - a punch, a knife, a bullet, maybe. You were tired of remembering now. Tired of collecting up pieces of your own fucking life in an attempt to map them back together.

The feeling of remembering your own death wasn't as heavy as your entire life coming back to you. It wasn't fun by any means but a singular memory, compared to over twenty years worth? You could handle that.

What was less easy to handle was Peter's face as you fell. He'd been just moments away from saving you, eyes already brimmed with tears and expression scrunched up as he realised it was too late. He'd reached out for you, tried to grab you, tried to save you. If he'd just been a few seconds later, things might have been different.

What weighed on you the most was the sudden realisation that he'd probably blamed himself for it over the last five years. That made your second fall earlier today even worst. What had been going through his head? What would he have done if he'd lost you the second time?

You turned back to face him, eyes brimmed with tears.

"Pete," your voice broke as you finally spoke. "Peter..."

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," he began. "I'd told you not to come that night and when you did, I thought I could handle fighting the guy off and protecting you-"

"- stop it!" you didn't mean to snap. "Just stop. I followed you up here, didn't I? I threw myself into the middle of the fight. I got in the way when he pushed me."

"I should have caught you," Peter swallowed, trying to fight back his own tears.

You snorted. "That's not your job!"

"I'm meant to protect you-"

"- my god, Pete," you placed your hands on either side of his face. "How much did you let this get to you over the last few years?"

"It's destroyed me," he admitted. "All of that stuff I said earlier about being half person...I meant it."

You pulled him towards you, pressing a passionate kiss to his lips. In that moment, Peter felt the weight of the last five years melt away from him. Every second that he spent blaming himself; every night he spent crying himself to sleep. It was all gone. Just like that, in a singular moment. The nightmare he'd been living was finally over and it was like his head was finally above water. He'd learnt to swim amongst the waves of his grief but there was nothing like breaking to the surface.

"I love you," you pressed your forehead to his. "Nothing you could ever do or say will make me stop, Peter Parker."

"I love you too," he gave you a teary smile. "I'm sorry I didn't catch you."

"You did, remember?" you took his hands in yours and gave them a squeeze. "Just a few hours ago, you caught me. That's what I'm gonna remember, yeah? None of this bullshit."

"Yeah, okay," he nodded. "And I'm always gonna catch you."

"I don't fall that much-"

"- you are very clumsy-"

"- so are you!"

Peter laughed, shaking his head. "I mean it more than just the physical sense. I'm always gonna catch you."

You pressed another kiss to his lips. "Yeah, I know."

taglist: @disastersim @elinedjarin @whatawonderfulusername @edencherries @jedi-valkyrie @xuxialling @plutoneu @chaoticevilbakugo @ilymarkchan @itscheybaby @isasv @notalxx @oswin05 @aleksanderwh0r3 @equivocalshit @epiphany-of-a-madwoman @turningtoclown @svft-cas @an

[gunsli-01]

Oh, I saw it now- i swear on my fucking life if I jump into Mikoto's tag one more got damn time for the top post to be talking about how he's bad rep. I'm gonna fucking lose it. Don't make me set friendly fire on and start sniping all your faves egos. Cause news flash no one here is representing anything well. So, get that shit off my lawn and outta the tag. "He's bad rep though" to you mother fucker to you I'm having a great time though.

Does anyone ever consider that just because a character has a certain diagnosis it doesn't mean the authors are saying everyone with said thing acts that way? That not all people who have certain diagnoses act and experience it in the same way. Especially when it comes down to something as personal and individualized as mental health. There's a difference between this doesn't properly represent your experience and it being bad representation overall.

Stop being dicks. Like damn the ableism is super thick in these streets.

From how everyone turned on Haruka because he wasn't the perfect definition of a victim anymore and needed to be put back in his place despite giving him a pass last trial cause the fanbase assumed he was autistic. Despite his second mv literally showing him undergoing more abuse. To giving Yuno a fucking free innocent verdict solely based on the bastardized politicization of her trial as literally every bit of information giving to us was ignored in favor of a moral high ground debate made by fucking charlatans. It's easy to sniff out the same self-righteous nonsense when it comes to Mikoto having d.i.d. People going he's not good rep because he's a murderer but Mu's a sapphic queen despite having murdered the girl she was interested in okay, alright, got ya.

Fuck off. Like I said when this information came out it's real funny how half the fandom graduated with a doctorate in psychology as soon as this information dropped. I didn't know this place was full of specialist in this field. Holy shit good on us. Now if only we had some detectives in our midst then maybe we could actually deduce the real facts of the situation presented to us instead of coming up with knee-jerk reactions based off feeling oriented pseudo-science.

[a-pretty-nerd]

V HITS DIFFERENT

FUCK ME

I WOULD LET THIS MAN DO UNSPEAKABLE THINGS TO ME!

So here's some headcannons because my hyperfixation is taking over my LIFE.

For my sanity's sake I'm going to say that after the events of DMC 5, V became his own entity outside of Vergil and he's now his own person.

Though he has Vergil's memories and considers them his own, he's his own individual which leaves him free to do as he pleases.

First on his list is his partner. Or hopefully soon to be partner. See, he met you and kinda fell for you before he merged to bring back Vergil.

In fact his memories and feelings for you was apart of how he came to be his own person aside from Vergil. While he was every human part of Vergil, it was his individual growth that made it too much and so Vergil was forced to spit him out while staying the same.

So now that he is free, and has you, his new life can begin.

Let's get the sweet SFW shit outta the way-

V can be stoic and quiet at times. Sometimes you might think he's mad or upset but really he's just thinking.

He's really taken with you.

Your strength, your interests, your personality, your appearance, your very being. He's enthralled by you and he cannot get enough.

You start living together pretty early on, and he's in heaven.

Sometimes poor guy gets imposter syndrome and he's prone to melancholy bouts of depression.

You're each other's emotional support Demon Hunters.

He'd probably go crazy without you.

Obviously he loves books, music, and surprisingly, cooking.

He's a creative type, clearly, and your shared spaces reflect that.

A two bedroom apartment or home is always necessary just because you always have to have a library/office space for the both of you.

One room with two desks and every wall covered by bookshelves. His collection grew really fast and continues to. So much so that you have to make him donate or trade in his old books in favor of new ones.

He won't talk about it unprovoked, but please, ask him about the book he's reading. Let him indulge in his hyperfixations and share them with you.

He has a very dry sense of humor. But you never fail to make him laugh.

He thinks you're perfection itself.

You make him feel so loved and cared for. He'd do anything for you.

He has all of the love languages. All of them.

He writes poetry about you and hides it away. You'll either have to find them yourself or beg him to let you read it.

When he realized you loved his poetry, he got more confident about it and he started writing poetic letters to you and leaving them for you to find around the apartment.

V gets flustered and blushes at the little things. Like you making him some tea, buying him something on a whim, turning over and snuggling him in your sleep, kissing his cheek without warning, smiling at him, etc.

V is very physically affectionate when you're alone. PDA isn't his thing. He does however, stay close to you in public. So don't turn around too fast because you might bump into him.

He's a tease on every level. He likes to you tease you about little things and crack witty jokes. He likes to get under your skin.

He loves it when you tease him back. He likes the witty back and forth of it. He doesn't laugh loudly very often, but he does smirk and chuckle.

Alright, now to the fun bit, NSFW:

V is cruel in bed.

Oh my God, his voice. He knows it makes you weak for him. He'll tuck his chin on your shoulder and speak softly in your ear.

The way he touches you, soft as a feather across your skin in an attempt to savor the feeling.

He's a switch, but rarely is there a real dom/sub thing between the two of you.

He'll try almost anything for you, he has his hard limits but other than those he's pretty kinky.

V doesn't have a super high libido, but he will almost never pass up an offer for sex with you.

He's a fast learner, sex also comes very naturally to him. The motion of the ocean is very, VERY good with this one.

He prefers to take his time, quickies are fun but not frequent.

V loves lingerie on you. He loves tracing the lacey patterns around your form with his eyes. The more delicate and artistic, the better.

As gentle and loving as he can be, he can and will fuck you into next week.

His favorite postion, now that he is in much better health and doesn't really need his cane, is having you on the edge of the bed while he fucks you.

He loves being able to lean up and grope you. To hold you and run his hands along your body. He loves to see your face, the way you look at him sends a chill down his spine.

He really likes talking dirty to you. He does it without really putting much thought into it. When things are really intense he'll just repeat himself in your ear.

"Yeah? Are you going to cum for me? Cum for me, love. Cum for me. Cum for me. Cum for me." He mutters into your neck.

He has a praise kink, of course. Tell him how good he makes you feel, how much you want him. He can't get enough.

Somedays, he just wants to stay in bed with you all day and fuck you over and over and over again. He wants to keep you all to himself, no interruptions, no distractions, just you and him.

He prefers to cum inside you. Of course with your consent. But it provides an intimacy he loves to indulge in.

He loves edging.

He does love the way you melt into his arms when he teases you. He's not one for control play, but sometimes, he can't help but revel in the way you beg for him. The way you moan and leave yourself so vulnerable to him to do as he pleases. You trust him so completely and that is a turn on for him on its own.

Somedays he just wants you to fuck him. He'll never explicitly ask for it but he wants you to pamper him.

Body worship is a big thing for him, giving and receiving.

It might actually take a minute for him to get comfortable to say what he really wants from you in bed. It's more comfortable for him to start out as the top, but as your intimate relationship builds, he will get to a place he feels safe and tells you everything.

Kiss him, everywhere. Especially his hips. For some reason his hips are sensitive to gentle touch. Kiss them, lick them, bite them, leave a hickey. In fact, leave hickeies everywhere.

V loves hickies, the look, the sensation. By the time you're done you're both riddled with them.

He hates the idea of public sex or sex tapes. He wants you alone. Those intimate moments are for you and him alone and he treasures them. No way in hell is he letting anyone else see that.

Bonus: Dilf V?

V is prime dilf material.

I think V would definitely need to be in a very specific, very safe place in life to want to have children.

He's not against having kids, especially with you. In fact, it's you that makes him warm up to the idea. If it's with you, then yeah, sure, but on several conditions.

He wants to keep them as far away from demons and demon hunting and all that, as possible.

If he is going to have kids, they are growing up nice and safe and normal.

He doesn't feel like he's great with kids, sometimes they make him nervous, but kids love him.

He's a hit during family events. He lets the kids "color in" tattoos. It's mostly children smearing marker over his arms but still, it's sweet.

V is very calm and kind, and somehow that translates into wild children stopping everything just to listen to him talk.

As a father, he's fucking ADORABLE.

He also refuses to let anyone else hold them for the first few months.

He is constantly doting over the baby, it is so hard for him to leave the house.

Reads to them, everyday. So precious.

He wants everyone to see and know about the baby and how amazing they are, but at the same time doesn't want anyone close to them.

Very protective papa.

After he gets over the nerves and fears with the first baby, he wants another.

Loves watching you with the kids. He thinks you're such an amazing parents.

[thethreeeyed-raven]

Journey to love

chapter one - the call

chapter two - road trip

chapter three - gas station

chapter four - the spectacular (weird) plan

chapter five - heroes

chapter six - the ‘L’ word

chapter seven - Love Will Tear Us Apart

chapter eight - "You do what you love, and fuck the rest."

chapter nine - You know what? Fuck stage fright.

pairing : Dwayne Hoover x gn!reader

word count : 1k

warnings : swearing

paul dano master list

wattpad version

ao3 version

Dwayne and Frank sat in a waiting area. Frank looked through a newspaper that was on the table between them and Dwayne just sat looking into space.

Frank turned the page, he found something he didn't expect.

'The surprise best-seller from America's #1 proust scholar.'

Beneath the writing was a man whom Frank had begun to Loathe. Larry Sugarman.

He sighed and put the newspaper back on the table.

Two little girls ran past, dressed in full glamour. Dwayne slightly shook his head and turned to Frank. "Let's get outta here."

-🌻-

The man that had put Olive into the system for her to compete entered the dressing room, asking Olive for her music. She gave it to him and told him she wanted track #12 to play.

-🌻-

On the peer, Dwayne and Frank where looking out to sea, embracing the wind.

"Sometimes I just wish I could go to sleep till I was eighteen, and skip all this crap-high school and everything-just skip it." Dwayne rested his arms on the wood and his chin on them.

"You know Marcel Proust?" Frank asked his nephew.

"He's the guy you teach." Dwayne replied as he turned to look at him.

"Yeah. French writer, total loser."

They both smiled at each other.

"Never had a real job. Unrequited love affairs. Gay. Spent twenty years writing a book almost no one reads. But he's also probably the greatest writer since Shakespeare. Anyway, he uh-he gets down to the end of his life and he looks back and decides that all those years he suffered, those were the best years of his life, 'cause they made him who he was. All the years he was happy? You know, total waste. Didn't learn a thing."

Dwayne averted his eyes in thought.

"So, if you sleep until you're eighteen, ugh, think of the suffering you're gonna miss! I mean, high school? High school-those are your prime suffering years. You don't get better suffering than that."

"You know what?" Dwayne slowly lifted himself. "Fuck beauty contests. Life is one fucking beauty contest after another. You know, school, then college, then work? Fuck that. And fuck the Air Force Academy. If I wanna fly, I'll find a way to fly. You do what you love, and fuck the rest."

"I'm glad you're talking again Dwayne. You're not nearly as stupid as you look."

They both chuckled and Dwayne shook his head, turning back around and went back to gazing into the horizon.

"Well, my dreams were basically crushed and-well, Y/n clearly wanted me to start talking again."

"Y/n? I saw what happened on that hill you know, I'm sure everyone else did too, but they probably won't say anything about it until you're comfortable."

"What, when they confessed to me?"

Frank nodded.

"We've been friends for a really long time, I just don't want it to go to shit when they potentially lose feelings for me, because I know I'll never lose feelings for them."

"They won't Dwayne, believe me they won't."

"How would you know, huh?"

Frank scoffed and shook his head. "I've seen the way they look at you Dwayne, to say you're only fifteen, they seem to have fallen hard for you."

Frank's words burned into Dwayne's head.

"Wanna go back?" Frank asked him.

"Not really."

Frank nodded.

"Yeah, we should go back."

-🌻-

Frank and Dwayne made their way into the room where the pageant was actually happening. The soon came trudging back out, pratically horrified at was they just saw.

"I'm going backstage." Dwayne said.

"Yeah, right, see ya."

-🌻-

Olive came out from behind the curtain.

"Oh, is that your costume?" Sheryl said in an excited voice.

"Mm-hmm!"

"You look amazing Olive!" You complemented the little girl as she gave you a smile.

"Thank you!"

She was wearing a red sports head band and a suit-like costume. Sheryl grabbed her number tag and put it on her outfit. Richard came up behind you all.

"Hey, what's going on?"

"Oh, I just-I came to wish Olive good luck."

Richard asked Olive how she was feeling and Sheryl said she was actually nervous. He asked if he could talk to Sheryl for a minute. You nodded and sat with Olive, going over her outfit.

-🌻-

Dwayne rushed through the backstage, passing hundreds of glammed up six and seven year olds.

"Are you authorised to be backstage?" A worker asked him as he went past.

"No." He answered bluntly. He turned to a random little girl. "Hey, where are the dressing rooms?"

"Are you allowed to be here?" The girl innocently asked him.

"Just tell me where the dressing rooms are." He knew he looked stupid arguing with a literal child, but he didn't care, as long as it stopped Olive from embarrassing herself in front of lots of people.

-🌻-

He eventually found his way to the dressing room, making his way to his mother and Richard. He didn't know what they were discussing.

When Sheryl noticed him, she turned to ask how he was. "Hey, how are you feeling?"

"Better. Where's Olive?"

"There, what's up?"

You looked up and smiled at the sound of Dwayne's voice, he didn't seem to notice as he was preoccupied with something else.

"Mom, I don't want Olive doing this."

Sheryl looked between her husband and son in disbelief. "Oh my god!"

"Look around, this place is fucked."

"He's right!" Both Richard and Dwayne were surprised to be agreeing with each other, and you were surprised to watch it happen.

"Look, I don't want these people judging Olive. Fuck them!"

"Listen, it is too late-"

"No, it's not too late. You're the mom, and you're supposed to protect her."

You thought it was best to not get involved in the conversation they were having.

"Everyone is gonna laugh at her, mom. Please don't let her do this."

"Olive Hoover, two minutes." Someone called out, notifying them.

"Look, she's not a beauty queen, she's just not. I'm gonna tell her."

Sheryl put her hands in front of Dwayne to try and stop him from going up to you two. You gave them a confused look but shrugged it off and decided to wait for Sheryl.

"No, Dwayne. You listen to me, Olive is who she is. She has worked so hard. She's poured everything into this. We can't just take it away from her. We can't."

Dwayne opened his mouth to get his point across again but Sheryl beat him to it.

"I know you wanna protect her. I know, honey. But, we gotta let Olive be Olive."

"Olive Hoover. Are you the family?"

Everyone turned around at the sound of a woman's voice, then nodded.

"Olive, it's time okay?" Sheryl said as she bent down to her level.

"Yeah." She got up and took her top hat from the dressing table, taking the woman's hand and quickly making her way to the stage.

Everyone else followed behind. You grabbed Dwayne's hand to try and keep up.

"Good luck honey!" Sheryl called out to her.

[thepriceisrizzoli]

here's another fic I have the audacity to be working on

this one's called honeybee

young rizzles ft. shy maura

romance / fantasy but fantasy like wishes coming true, not fantasy like dragons

a little sweet, a little sad, a little twilight zone

happy ending tho

chapter 1

“Have you ever considered therapy?”

“Pff,” she flicks a hand dismissively, the one whose elbow is propped on the back of her chair. “If I’m gonna be a cop, I can’t go cryin’ to a shrink every time something stressful happens.”

Ms Patterson’s overplucked brows rise a little, and Jane knows immediately that she’s chosen the wrong tactic to use on her guidance counselor.

Oldschool veteran fortitude is a dumb look on a kid who’s been 20 for a whole month. She’s come off instead as a judgmental little shit, too big for her britches.

“Actually, Jane, people in law enforcement aren’t above needing to take care of their mental health. In fact, they’re some that need to the most. And if that’s the attitude you intend to impress potential employers with, I can promise you, it’ll get you passed over faster than you can blink.”

Jane straightens up in her chair, getting humble. It’s a speech that lasts several minutes, and she’s earned it. She knew better. Or should've.

Really, she does have to get her attitude under control. The hard-shelled sarcastic smartass thing worked fine socially as a teenager, but in the real world, it’s going to hold her back.

She’ll need Ms Patterson as a reference before long, so it’s in her best interest to demonstrate some growth.

.

So, here she is. Wasting her only night off at some stupid support group.

Ok, it’s not stupid. Not for the people who need it. She doesn’t. Not in an above-it way; her life just isn’t that bad.

Everyone else here has shared truly awful stories so far, and any one of them would probably trade lives with her in an instant. She fidgets with the hem of her lucky jersey, ashamed to be here over nothing.

As soon as she absorbs enough to be able to fake an epiphany that’ll satisfy Ms Patterson, she’s outta here.

The talkative people have talked, and now the guy in charge is looking to see if one of the quiet ones want to share. He picks a blonde about Jane’s age, pretty and very well-dressed.

Jane is a little relieved at the sight of her, because maybe her problems aren't the most trivial in the room after all. She braces herself for a tragic tale like ‘Daddy bought the wrong color Bentley for my birthday’.

The girl looks positively terrified to have been chosen. Her name is Laura - maybe? The few quiet words she’ll say are addressed to her own lap, and the only ones Jane catches are "nothing really" and “benign neglect”.

She looks like she might have a nervous breakdown if spoken to any more, and the guy gives up.

Next, everybody is told to pair off, and that's the final straw for Jane.

She glances over in time to see that girl tighten around her purse and eye the door like she's going to bolt. And the second everybody starts murmuring and milling around, she does.

Both curious and eager for the opportunity to bail, Jane follows her into the hall.

"Hey?"

Laura whirls around, looking scared like maybe Jane has chased her out to scold her.

"I-I'm sorry, I should've excused myself, I didn't want to be disrup-"

"Relax, I'm ducking out too," Jane smiles, flashing her palms.

"Oh," the blonde flashes a mechanically polite smile, and they continue down the hall toward the double exit doors, almost side by side.

Jane's been practicing making quick connections with people. Connections get people on her side, make them open up, say what they know. A good detective would have to be good at that, and she likes the idea of honing those skills early.

She challenges herself to win over this nervous stranger before they go their separate ways into the night.

"I think there's enough of 'em that they won't miss us," she adds, smiling conspiratorially. It doesn't work, maybe because the other girl is looking at the floor.

She outpaces her at the end of the hallway, wanting to be the one to open the door. The clack of the push bar echoes loudly, and she puts her weight against the heavy door, holding it open.

Something hard to read flickers across the girl’s face. Jane watches the top of her head pass at eye level, preparing one last try.

“If anybody ask-”

Barely through the threshold, the blonde turns around suddenly, blurting “Why?”, causing Jane to stop short, both verbally and physically, and get clipped by the closing door.

“Why what?” she asks, amused.

“Sorry.” Laura backs up and shuts her eyes hard for a second, clearly scolding herself internally. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, why what?”

“Why are you.. ducking.”

"Eh. What I came here about is a trip to Disney World compared to some of that stuff,” she says, nodding over her shoulder. “Feels wrong to put my problems alongside theirs."

"I felt the same,” the girl glances up a bit more brightly. “Like I was intruding."

Jane lets her feel sure she’s about to ask about her past, and then asks something else.

She likes to pinpoint the change in peoples’ faces when she does that. Don’t ask turning into why didn’t you ask is immediate and almost always an eyebrow thing. I could tell you if you asked is a separate stage that takes a little more work, and you have to watch the broader body language for it.

In this girl’s case, it’s in the way she rotates to face Jane more directly as they stand outside, keys in hand, chatting somewhat one-sidedly.

It's Maura, with an M. Actually, she seems like a nice girl who’s painfully shy, but trying hard to put herself out there. It makes Jane want her to succeed.

Their chat finds a lull, and Jane is disappointed at the prospect of them parting ways just yet.

So she points across the street and says how about they go get a quick cup of coffee instead of standing around a dark parking lot? And she swears Maura thinks about bolting again before nodding yes.

They slide into a well-worn booth and Maura asks and Jane hits the highlights of her tale: Pop's drinking, the fighting, the divorce. Becoming a de facto mother and head of household at 13 because Ma had to work every waking moment just to keep a roof over their heads. How she's arrived at 20 feeling robbed of the teen years that are apparently supposed to be so golden.

Finding out Maura's deal is not as easy. Although she follows Jane's story with genuine compassion, when the time comes that she should naturally volunteer something about herself in return, she just stares at her cup.

“You readin’ those tea leaves, or?”

“No,” Maura answers with no inkling that this was a joke. “There aren’t any.”

She slides the cup forward, meaning to show Jane, and the momentum makes a little tea slosh out, soaking into Jane’s white shirt sleeve.

“Ohno,” she whispers, scrambling for a napkin and dabbing at the stain with shaking hands. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry-”

“It’s fine,” Jane laughs, but Maura looks like she’s on the verge of panic. “Seriously, don’t worry about it.”

“I ruined your shirt...”

“This? It’s an improvement. Here,” she picks up her own cup, dribbling some coffee along her other sleeve. “Maybe I can get kind of a tie-dye thing going on. Whaddya think?”

Maura gapes like she has no precedent in the entire world for how to react to this. At a loss, she slowly comes around to following Jane’s cue, and arrives at an uncertain laugh. Jane considers it a win.

“What brought you out here tonight?” she asks while the mood is still fresh.

Maura smiles nervously at her fingernails. “My problems don’t belong alongside yours, either.”

Jane feels a pang of guilt that her first reaction to Maura was the exact one she was afraid of.

“I bet they do.”

Practicing her interrogation skill is no longer why Jane wants to talk to this girl, but sitting across a table and working hard for clipped answers, that's kind of how it feels.

Maura talks in tight little summaries, like she’s getting scored on brevity.

Eventually, she gets enough to piece together a profile: 19 year old BCU student; an adopted only child; her parents are very self-involved career people; the independence they meant to instill in her is really just crippling perfectionism and social anxiety.

“They would’ve cared. The group,” she says. “I care, and I was probably the biggest jerk in there. Your problems don't have to be the most horrible for you to deserve to talk about ‘em."

Maura smiles, glancing up only momentarily.

"Thank y- I mean. You too- What? You don’t seem like a jerk."

Jane smirks, sipping the last of her coffee. “Only ‘cause you don’t know me.”

A silence passes. She tries to identify the song barely audible on the radio.

One perfectly-arched caramel eyebrow has a thin scar beneath it, and Jane wonders if there's trauma behind that, and if she's self conscious about it. She shouldn't be. She's pretty.

"You gonna go back next week?"

Maura hesitates, looking out the window. "Are you?"

That’s another win. Jane's grin goes unseen.

"Only if it was just this part. We could be our own really exclusive support group… for people with medium-size problems."

It's designed to get a smile, but it doesn't really. Maura’s hesitation lasts longer this time, and Jane is about to end her misery when she spits out a "Yes" that sounds awfully forced.

“Same bat time, same bat channel?”

Maura goes blank.

Jane tries again. "Here, next week? Sevenish?" and this time gets a nod. She taps her knuckles softly on the table. "Cool."

She doesn't suggest exchanging numbers. There's a ninety percent chance this girl was just avoiding the confrontation of saying no. She'll let her flake in peace.

[razrbladekiss]

Tyrants | Chapter Three - Presage

WORD COUNT: 2.4k

WARNINGS: Brief mentions of Wendy’s drug use. Nothing explicitly *bad* goes on here, just some of the usual SOA shit is hinted at. :) Tig <3

MASTERLIST

Ninety degrees was horrendous. Ninety-six degrees saw Isla spiraling toward a fully-fledged mental breakdown, desperate to climb out of her own fucking flesh and melt into the parking lot outside of St. Thomas.

Seeing the Sons sporting leathers, hoodies, and long-sleeved shirts underneath their cuts made her skin crawl, too.

She'd thrown on the flounciest summer dress she owned, thin and wispy, and she was still roasting to death underneath the Californian sunshine.

It felt like they were living in the fucking ass-crack of hell.

Though, with their current state and Charming's infestation of ATF and other federal agents, hell wasn't too far off the mark.

"Thanks for the ride." Isla expressed her gratitude as she slid off of the back of Tig's bike, pulling the helmet away from loose blonde curls.

"No problem, baby--you good to get home, yeah?"

"Yeah. I'm meeting Gem here, so she'll take me back to T M in time to pick my car up," she confirmed, readjusting herself.

She couldn't risk Tig Trager getting an eyeful of her asscheeks today. Not again, anyway.

"Perfect. See 'ya later, beautiful." Isla leaned in for him to peck her cheek--which was habitual for the pair--and she did the same.

Her smile was wide. She was beaming. "Bye, Tiggy. I love you."

"Love you too, kid." He reciprocated the smile, squeezing her hand as she broke away and padded toward the steps, brushing her fingers through wind-tousled strands.

Things were, for the first time in about a week, finally looking up. Resuming a sense of normality, perhaps.

She and Trager had been on precarious terms since that day, and had been avoiding one another altogether. Which, for them, was strange.

Days went by without even so much as a word being uttered between the pair, no backhanded comments, or even sideways glances.

Usually, they'd be bickering like kids, arguing nonsensically until Clay or Chibs broke them apart--but it was all just their little bit of fun. Because they bounced off of one another.

They lauded the relationship they shared because, really, it was one of the strongest.

He'd been her official favorite since the very day that they met--he and Bobby were the two she liked to talk to whenever she felt that she couldn't confide in her father.

But the last few days were so fucking hard. She was struggling with the weight of all that she did, coupled with the stress of not being able to discern Tig's current feelings on her.

And after she'd lashed out, had bitched at him for no fucking reason, she was pretty certain that Tiggy didn't want to know anymore.

That was thrown out of the window this morning, however, when Isla's clutch blew out, and she needed a ride from the garage to the hospital to see Abel.

Of course Tig was there for her. He always would be.

"Hey." Isla spoke softly as she held the little blue bear close to her chest. "I stopped by the gift shop on the way up here--Jax said he's already got bears and balloons comin' outta his ass, so I thought what's one more?"

Gemma couldn't help but smile, gesturing for the blonde to sit with her opposite Abel's isolette.

"He'll love you for it," she joked, though she knew that she was appreciative. For her company more so the stuffed animal.

With their commitment to the club and the current battle against the ATF, Jax and Clay weren't as hands on as what they usually would've liked.

Of course, Teller was at that baby's side whenever he got the chance to break away from SAMCRO, but he wanted more. He wanted the satisfaction of knowing that his little boy was being provided with the best possible care at St. Thomas.

And he was. He absolutely was. But he needed to know--for his own peace of mind, he needed to see that. So, his mother was there every waking fucking moment, giving him that love he could only get from his Grandma.

"How's he doing?" Her query was braided around a whisper, worried she'd disturb Abel's peaceful rest. "Jax said he should be coming home soon."

Gemma simply affirmed with a nod, gazing affectionately at her grandson.

It was heartwarming to see so much love, so much adoration from a woman who had a reputation for being a fucking cunt--thus proving that Gemma's main priority was her family, and their health and happiness.

That, somehow, made Isla love her even more than what she already did.

It also made her a tad jealous of Jax and the fact that he still had his mother in his life.

"He's gettin' stronger and stronger everyday. Tara said he'll be set to leave Friday--"

"Tara?" Her brow lifted as she put the bear amongst the pile of gifts. "I thought she was a doctor, I didn't think she had anything to do with the babies?"

Gemma's smile faltered a little. "She's a pediatric surgeon. Been takin' care of Abel since the start."

"Oh."

Now, she would've known that if she'd taken the time to visit her best friend's kid since he was born. But she hadn't--she hadn't even considered taking a trip over to St. Thomas to check in on Jax's baby.

And it was for the simple fucking reason that she couldn't bear the thought of facing Wendy and having to be nice to her. Especially after what she fucking did to that poor little boy.

She subsequently landed her own flesh and blood in the hospital after shooting heroin while pregnant? And she wanted Jax to pardon her for it?

Isla wasn't a hateful person, she didn't care about what people did in their spare time because that was their time.

But the moment an innocent person was harmed due to the carelessness of others...That was when she felt a scathing animosity.

"She's good with him." Gemma stated bitterly, snapping Isla from her ire-fueled daydream. "Kills me to say it, but she's a gem. A real fuckin' star."

"I'd bet. She was always good with kids."

"Yeah?" Suddenly interested, the older woman crossed over her arms. "Who's kids?"

Finally, Isla took a seat beside her on top of plush blue leather.

"A few of the girls we were in high school with had kids pretty young and Tara was usually super keen to hold them, or just hang out at their places whenever we weren't at school. Or it could've just been the wannabe doctor in her, now that I think about it."

"She's pretty maternal," Isla hummed in agreement, "but I'm glad she and Jax never had kids when you were teenagers--I don't know how that would've looked for him."

Suddenly, she was staring at Gemma like she had two fucking heads.

"I don't trust her." She elaborated, drawing another confused glance from Isla. "She and Jax would have been a fucking disaster had she stayed--"

"And things worked out so much better with Wendy?" A little more vehemently than intended, the blonde asked.

Now Gemma was the one shooting dirty looks.

"Look, Gem, I'm just saying. Jax and Tara are history now, yeah? You don't have to trust her. Just thank her for what she's doing for your grandson because when he's outta this place, you won't need to worry about her."

"And you're so sure about that, huh?" Skeptically, she asked. Arms folded over. "You know what they're like--like two fucking magnets or something. They always find a way back to one another."

That line gutted her.

It hurt her--it was agonizing--but she wasn't sure why she was so beaten by it. Because it was the truth, wasn't it?

Tara and Jax were, at one point, the strongest couple she'd ever known, and when it fizzled out he was fucking broken. She hadn't seen him so downtrodden since JT had passed, and he was suddenly left without the strength and guidance of his father.

She was his everything. Isla was a fool to think he'd be able to see her back in Charming and not feel something for her. His first love.

"I think we should throw Abel a homecoming party on Friday--if he's coming home then, that is." Gemma shifted the topic of conversation, getting to her feet.

"Absolutely. I'll help."

"Yeah?" She asked a little doubtingly, reaching over to pick Abel up. "You don't have to--I know you work Friday's."

Isla waved her off, standing beside the brunette. "I do, but it's no bother. If everyone's gonna be there, then I wanna show my face too. Offer a helping hand of some sort."

"Alright, perfect," Gem stated softly, holding the baby close to her chest. "When we get back to T M, we can figure out what we need to get."

"Sounds like a plan--" Isla was cut off by a soft knocking at the door, irritating her a little bit because she'd only just gotten there and hated the idea of having to leave already.

She made a mental note to stop by a little earlier tomorrow.

"Hey, sorry to bother you--" Tara stopped herself when she needed her estranged friend, almost dropping the clipboard she was holding against her chest.

Isla Telford was the last fucking person she expected to see today.

"Hey," with a fake smile, she greeted.

The tension was palpable.

Gemma felt the irritation washing over her favorite of the duo, urging her to turn her attention back toward her grandson before she said anything to worsen the situation.

Because she would've.

"Uh, I've gotta run a few tests on Abel before we determine that he'll be ready to leave this week, if that's alright?" Tara gestured to Gemma, ignoring Isla's presence.

That stung a little bit.

"Yeah. It's fine." The response was blunt. Terse, to a point.

"Great."

Isla realized that she wasn't wanted in that space any longer. She grabbed her purse, turning toward the door. "I'll meet you outside."

"Yeah, alright," Gemma put the baby back into his crib, smiling at Isla. "You want my keys?"

"I'll wait on the steps--I'm gonna smoke--"

"Before you go," Tara cut in. She cleared her throat, trying to smile--but she just couldn't.

Telford sensed where it was going, however. There wasn't a reason for her to stop Isla in her tracks, in front of Gemma no less.

She wondered how long it'd take for it to be brought up.

"Thanks."

Gratitude genuinely swept over the doctor, letting Isla know she was truthful in her acknowledgment--or, was it more like a form of praise? Because Jax definitely told Tara what they both did for her, and she was astounded that the woman would even float the idea of helping out.

It was a strange notion. To know what she did--when she looked and acted like that--was fucking weird. And nobody would've believed her if she said that Isla helped to dispose of a dead body, which did make her laugh a little.

She knew how to hold, load, and fire a pistol, but she wasn't capable of committing the unspeakable the same way that Jax, or Chibs, or Clay were capable of it.

But she was slowly earning her title as 'Daughter of Sgt. At Arms/ Man of Mayhem.' And she wasn't sure how she liked that.

"You're welcome," she spoke plainly. "Hope everything is alright now, Tara."

"It is."

"Good." Her retort was immediate, laced with that same genuineness the other woman expressed. "You free this coming friday?"

Hesitantly, she nodded.

"If all goes to plan--and Abel is good to come home--we're gonna throw a little party for the boy," Gemma confirmed with a nod. "You wanna swing by? Everyone'll be there--Donna, Ope, their kids, Wendy, the rest of the Sons. You should come. It'll be nice for everyone to see 'ya again."

Wendy's name falling from those pink lips, in such a positive light, maimed Isla. She and Jax were starting to get along a little bit better now, but she was still wary of that woman.

"Yeah. It'll be great," the older woman added.

Tara felt cornered. She knew that she wasn't really wanted, and she also knew that was a way for Isla and her menopausal best friend--old enough to be her fuckin' mom--to keep the doctor as close as possible without explicitly saying that they wanted to keep an eye on her.

"Sure. I'll stop by."

"Brilliant." Gemma conceded, slipping past the pair. "Address hasn't changed, sweetheart."

It was passive aggressive, sickly-sweet, and it was Gemma to a fucking T. The woman was loathing every second she had to spend with Tara Knowles and she wasn't even trying to hide it.

But it didn't have to be for very long, she thought.

"What was that all about? Why'd she thank you?" Gem queried as they got outside, passing the lighter to her left.

"For not breaking her fucking neck when I had the chance to all those years ago, probably."

Isla sparked her cigarette, pacing alongside her as they headed toward the car.

"That's bullshit."

"How so?"

"Just is." She could read Chibs's little girl like a fucking book. "But I won't press--if it's something between you and Tara, I don't care to hear. Just lemme know if it goes south. I can put a bullet in her for you, baby."

Isla would've laughed had she not known that Gemma was deadly fucking serious about blowing Tara's brains out.

But it was a relief. For her to give it up just like that--uncharacteristically so--was a kind of relief that she never thought she'd feel from Gemma Teller.

She was used to being protected. Used to being viewed as the one that needed to be shielded from the horrors that shrouded the Sons. But Isla wasn't innocent, nor was she fucking stupid.

The security was appreciated, however. Because, lately, things just didn't seem to be going too great for her.

And, if she'd learned anything, they'd only worsen from here on out.

"You don't have to go full mama bear mode, Gem. I'm a big girl."

She laughed, turning to face Isla.

"I know," smoke blew from her nose, "but you've gotta protect the ones you wanna keep close, y'know? The ones you love."

The tip of Gemma's boot pulverized her cigarette into the sidewalk as she fished for the car keys, avoiding eye contact all together.

"I haven't been able to protect everyone I've wanted to from the shit that goes on in this town, honey, but I'm really tryin'. And I couldn't live with myself if anything happened to you or my boy."

[butteraway]

when time runs out | ii

⋆ summary:  A young girl has fallen deeply ill with an unknown disease in her, so with all her free time spent in an empty hospital room, she spends it online playing video games. That's until she meets her cousins friends, one spiking her interest with his extremely vulgare language.

pairing: bakugou katsuki x reader

word count: 2.1k

warnings: small mentions of suicide (I’ll put a star ‘⋆’ on top and below the paragraph so you can skip over it if your uncomfortable, you won’t miss anything too important so dont worry!)

"Bro, honestly I still can't believe that you of all people made it into the elite, number one hero school in the country."

"Waahh, I'm telling you! I'm the real deal Y/N!"

"So, how's your summer been? School's gonna be starting soon, are you excited?" Denki could only smile and sigh as his character was finally killed off.

Said girl chuckled as she heard Denki's voice rise through her headphones as they continued killing zombies in front of them. She grimaced as a zombie attacked her from behind her character. Geez, I never get a break in this game.

"Well, to be honest, nothing big really happened besides me getting my acceptance letter from U.A. Just me training and hanging with the fam." He laid back in the comfort of his bed, headphones still on in order to hear his cousin.

"Aah, already training, hero boy? That's why you haven't been visiting me lately." Y/N pouted and crossed her arms as her TV screen turned black, returning her to the main page of the game.

"Man, we suck at this game!" Denki laughed out loud as he saw how long they lasted in the last round. Y/N smiled and let out a small giggle of her own as she placed down her controller.

"Yeah, how long have we had this game for? It still feels like it's our first time playing this." Denki cracked a smile, even though Y/N couldn't see him.

"Hey, sorry for not being able to come to the hospital. Getting ready for U.A. is no joke, haha." Denki rubbed the nape of his neck, eyebrows scrunching up with regret. 

"Nah nah, it's fine! I understand that you have things to do. You have big plans for the future." Y/N brushed a strand of her hair away from her face, looking down at the needles that were plunged into her arms. Her eyes were clouded with an emotion she often felt when talking with Denki. She always felt guilty whenever the feeling came around.

"Must be nice to be able to achieve your dreams." Jealousy. She hated the feeling she got every now and then, but you couldn't really blame her. She lost everything in only a couple of months. Silence passed between the two teenagers, Y/N finally realizing what she said.

"Uh s-sorry about that! I didn't mean to say that alou-" Y/N was cut off by Denki's soft voice.

"Y/N, it's... okay to feel like that. I don't understand what you have been going through, but I know that you shouldn't bring yourself down for something you can't control. You're such an amazing person and to be honest. . ." Denki paused as Y/N's eyes began to glaze over.

"I'm doing this for me and you. You always encouraged me to take any opportunity by, as you like to say, the neck. I-I wanna make you proud, y'know? I wanna make it feel like you're a part of this crazy world, even if you're not really here, walking with me through it all."

Y/N’s lips wobbled as she let out a watery laugh. She hunched over, small tears falling down her face. To someone else, this would've boosted their ego, but to Y/N, those words meant the world to her. No one had ever said that to her before. She felt like she had a purpose in this wretched life of hers. She sniffles were heard by Denki

"H-hey! It's okay, p-please don't cry!" Y/N heard shuffling coming from Denki as he reassured her to not cry.

"I mean it. I only wish you could be there though, it would be so much cooler!" Denki smiled, trying to lighten up the mood. Y/N's sniffles slowly quieted down as she let out a soft laugh that made his heart swell with joy. At least he can make her laugh.

"I'm s-sorry, but no one has ever told me t-that." Small hiccups came from the girl as she calmed down, taking deep breaths to slow her heart rate. Won't want doctors to come rushing in just to see her crying over something so small.

⋆

"I-I'm just really happy you said that." Denki's heart clenched at those words, his chin trembling every now and then. He knew that Y/N wasn't happy with where she was. She had even admitted that she had urges to rip out the needles and slowly lose her life from there. Denki spent the rest of that night talking to her after. To say he was concerned was an understatement. He was terrified when she told him.

⋆

"I think us being able to play games together is already enough!" They both laughed and talked for a couple of minutes before deciding to to hang up. 

"Y/N, I mean it when I say I want you to be happy, okay? I hope you feel better tomorrow. Buh-bye!" Y/N said her goodbye to Denki, hanging up and closing the laptop that sat on a movable table. 

Her smile slowly left her face, leaving her staring blankly at the pure white wall and mirror in front of her. When visitors were gone, her window would turn to a mirror so no one would disturb her. Y/N took a good look at herself and only sighed. Despite being as healthy as she could get, she looked a bit on the thin side, this complimenting her skin. Running a hand through her hair, she untangled the little knots that had formed there.

"Geez, what happened to you girl? You look like a zombie." Y/N looked at the zombie game and cringed.

"Literally."  Just then the door to her room opened and shut quickly, the air filter turning on when a female doctor entered. Y/N watched her carefully as she checked the IV that connected to her arm. The protective suit never made Y/N feel better about her condition.

"Are you alright, Ms. L/N?" The light, stern voice rang through her ears as she looked at the woman in front of her. Y/N gave the doctor a grin.

"Never been better."

It had been an hour since the doctors had turned the lights off, but Y/N didn't feel the slightest bit of exhaustion. She had been sitting in the pitch black room for the time being and was really debating on turning on the TV.

"Ahh, fudge it." Instinctively reaching out for the remote, she turned on the TV and winced as the bright light hit her.

Looking back to the screen, she chose the option of going online and waited for other players to join. While waiting, a new character popped up next to her and she could only smirk at their username. Tapping on her mic, she decided to make conversation with them to see if they also had a mic.

"Now, what to play. What to play..." Y/N had settled for playing OverWatch since she didn't feel like playing any story type games. No cliffhangers tonight, Y/N thought. As the game loaded, she laid back and began thinking about cheesecake. When was the last I ate strawberry cheesecake? Great, now I want some. Thinking about eating cheesecake made her excited about the next day.

"Well hello, dear ol' '​​​​​King Explosion Murder_1.' Nice name you got there." Y/N chuckled as she said the name out loud, seeing another player enter.

"Hello 'Tape Dispenser?' What's with the wack name?" The girl’s eyes crinkled as she smiled at their name, hearing the user chuckle through her headphones. '​​​​​​King Explosion Murder' still had yet to reply, but that didn't bother her. They're either using the bathroom or don't have a mic. 

"The name was inspired by my quirk. But what's up with '_DeathGirl_', huh? You good?"  Y/N could only laugh at what he said. She should really send him a friend request.

"I’m honestly great, a little tired, but great! I just gotta make up a name, y'know? But your quirk has to do with tape? I don't know if that's wicked or useless." The boy laughed while Y/N laughed as well, losing her grip on her controller. That was until a gruff voice interrupted their laughing session.

"Shut the fuck up, your annoying ass voices are giving me a damn headache." Finally, after being silent, 'King Explosion Murder_1' spoke up.

"Aah, so you do talk. I don't know why you didn't say anything sooner Mr. Explosion Murder." The other player could only sneer at what she said, hitting his desk with his fist. Another player had joined, Y/N only noticing.

"Ah, hello 'Sleep Deprived Controller!'" Said player made their character wave, making Y/N chuckle. While they had their interaction, 'King Explosion Murder' was shouting at her, now realizing that she wasn't paying attention to what he was saying.

"Hey! Listen to me when I'm fucking talking to you, emo bitch!" Y/N’s eyes widened, soon rolling her eyes, watching the game load as they were placed into a match. What's his damn problem?

"Hey man, no need to go calling people names now." 'Tape Dispenser' nervously chuckled as he heard the other player growl. Y/N sported a shocked face as she heard this. What is he, a dog??? 

"Outta this conversation, extra!" Tape dude could only deadpan at what he was just called. Who calls people extras?? I’m not an extra, in fact I think I’m- 'Sleep Deprived Controller' listened with an annoyed expression on their face, wishing they could shut their shouting teammate up. Damn, wish I actually had a mic.

The game began as all the players separated, going their own way to kill their enemies. Everyone was in the zone, getting items and yelping every now and then if they were attacked. The first to go down was 'Tape Dispenser', then 'Sleep Deprived Controller', leaving both Y/N and 'King Explosion Murder' left on their team. Y/N smirked at their winning team, only one player was left on the other team. Just as the game was going to end, the opposing player shot down 'Explosion Murder', killing him.

"FUUUUUUUUUUUUU-" His mic cut off, causing the two players with mics in a cackling mess. Y/N calmed down, remembering she was still playing, trying to hunt down the last player. Finally, after many curses by a certain player and cheering from another, she located her enemy. 

"You better fucking win this or I'll kill you." Knowing he didn't mean that last part, she only focused on the first part. You better win this. Those words echoed through her head as she stopped aiming for the player. She hated being told what to do.

"Ah, so you're one of those people." Not knowing what she meant, they only watched with wide eyes at what she did. Y/N jumped down next to the enemy, shooting them twice with her weakest gun, signaling them that she was there. Quickly, the other player shot her character down, killing her. They lost the game.

"THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?! WE COULD'VE FUCKING WON!" Explosion Murder wasn't taking defeat easily like the other two were. Y/N could only give a grunt of disapproval towards the loud player.

"Ha, why did you just give up right there? You could've easily killed him." Tape Dispenser was just as confused as the other two players, slightly disappointed at the loss. Y/N sighed as she rubbed her forehead.

"Sorry not sorry, but this dude really thought he could get away with telling me what to do. I'll make my move when I'm ready, sorry to disappoint you guys." She sighed as she rubbed her neck, ready to hear the disapprovals of her teammate. But what she heard and saw made her smile.

"Nah, it's fine. It can get a tiny bit annoying with Murder yelling in your ear." Tape Dispenser reassured her, with Sleep Deprived's character giving her a thumbs up. Though, the annoyed sigh caught her attention back to him. Her eyebrow twitched. What is it now?

"I'm done with this fucking sappy shit scene. I'm out." Those were Murder's last words before he disconnected, leaving them in an awkward silence before Y/N stifled a giggle.

"I have a feeling that won't be the last time I'm seeing him." Tape Dispenser chuckled while Sleep Deprived's character shook their head, making Y/N softly laugh. After sending friend requests to both people, she bid them both fair well and left.

Y/N turned off her console and tv, putting the controllers on the table near her. She laid down in the comfort of her bed, thinking about her interactions with the people she met. She smiled, closing her eyes and drifting into a dreamless slumber with only one thought in mind. 

King Explosion Murder is such a weird name.

[robert-de-niro-only-fans]

The Lesser of Two Evils

Jimmy Conway x Paulie's Daughter Reader

Just felt like writing for Jimmy... Also bc I like @yesbelladoesstuff 's man more than my own apparently 😂😝

TW: mentions of crime, mention of age gap, implied smut

Word Count: 3k

After four long years full of hard work and missing your family, college was finally over! You hadn't gone far for college, and you visited as possible, but the work load of college doesn't always allow for that. For Paulie, it was important that you get a degree, even if you didn't have a "real" job after college; he just knew you were too smart, and you knew it would make him so proud that his little girl finished college.

You moved home on a Thursday after finals and took Friday to just spend time with your dad and the rest of your immediate family, before the rest of your "family" came over for the big party on Saturday. This included Tommy, Henry, and Jimmy and all the various "uncles" your dad did business with. It was a closed circle of people.

You had been home for holidays and summers in between semesters, but towards the end of college, you really started to realize that you weren't in the loop like you used to be. Tommy had really grown into a well-respected mobster, and you respected that they may make him within the next few years. He was still hot headed as ever though. As for Henry, it seemed like he tried to hold off as long as he could, as he had always had a huge crush on you, and everyone, including Paulie, had placed bets on when you two would get together. But he had started going out with this girl named Karen. You had only met her a few times, but you had heard that she kept Henry on the straight and narrow. Good for her.

Jimmy hadn't had too much change in his life during your years at college, except that he had too younger mobsters to help him on his various jobs. He made a lot more money because of them! You never thought when you went to college that you would find yourself missing Jimmy as much as you did; of course, you had always been close with him just like you were with Tommy and Henry, but there was just something about him. He was always very cool, and his jokes were few and far between but hilarious when he told them. He had always been protective over you in a way the other two weren't, you guessed because he was older, but he also let you get away with stuff your dad would've had a heart attack over. Hell, Jimmy encouraged bad behavior.

And that's where you found yourself early Saturday afternoon: fighting off thoughts of Jimmy, and a little nervous to see him because of it.

The table is all set, covered in a black table cloth, with gold and silver decorations everywhere to celebrate your graduation. A few dishes full of your favorite foods are set out, and more will arrive as the family does.

As the family pours in, the table fills with dishes and becomes surrounded by people you've known practically your whole life. You are handed envelopes full of cash, each one thicker than the last. That's how you did presents in this business.

You wondered where the boys were... It's unusual that they didn't show up first.

After a while, Henry arrives with Karen and they greet you with the usual hugs and kisses on the cheek; you can tell Karen is still getting used to greeting people like this. "Glad you have you home, (Y/N)! Congrats!" Henry exclaims. Rather than money, they gift you with a beautiful set of jewelry. You knew Karen was good for Henry, and now you know she has good taste.

"Oooh, there she is!" Jimmy yells as he's coming in the door. Tommy and Jimmy show up right after Henry and Karen. They were likely all hanging out before coming over, but you had to wonder why they didn't just take the same car. Tommy hands you a stack of cash, like he was taught to do, giving you kisses on your cheeks and a sincere congrats for graduating. Before you can really finish up your conversation with Tommy, Jimmy is scooping you up into his arms and twirling you around playfully, earning a squeal from you. "Atta girl! We knew you could do it!" He lets you down gently and pulls you in for a proper hug. "Congratulations, (Y/N). You know everyone here is so proud of you."

As you move back into the dining room and living room to rejoin the party and visit with everyone, Jimmy's hand lingers on you: your shoulder blades, the small of your back, wrapped lightly around your hip. He had always been a bit handsy with you; it's just how you two were with one another, but today it's affecting you more than usual.

Jimmy is wrapped up in a conversation about something he's been bootlegging with one of the uncles, so you turn to him to say, "Hey Jimmy, in gonna go sit with my dad at the table, 'cause I think we're eating soon. I'll save you a seat next to me, if you want it."

"Okay, sweetie, I'll be there in a little while."

You walk away taking a deep breath to try and clear your mind. Had you always felt this way about Jimmy or had something changed?

You say next to your dad and leaned your head on his shoulder.

"Hey there, girlie! You enjoying the party? Everything okay?"

"Yeah I'm okay. It's good seeing everyone again, and knowing that I get to stay home for good this time."

Paulie puts his arms around you, squeezing you tight. He always gave the best hugs! "I'm so happy you're back home. It's been pretty lonely without my girl here... Now I'm gonna have to beat off guys with a stick to keep you here," he lets out a chuckle.

"Oh, Dad, I'm not going anywhere, and you know that. Besides, Henry went and got a girlfriend, so there goes my only shot at a boyfriend."

"Now, you know Henry wasn't your only option. What about Tommy?"

You both look across the room to see Tommy flirting with someone's daughter...

"Ehhh, no," you and your dad say in unison before having a big laugh together.

"Is this seat taken?"

You look over your shoulder to see Jimmy standing behind the chair next to you, "Reserved for you."

"Oh, good!" Jimmy takes a moment to say hello to Paulie before sitting down next to you.

Paulie stands up to announce that it's time to eat, but first he makes a small speech to let everyone know how proud he is of you for finishing college, and that you were always too bright and talented to belong to him.

While Paulie is standing at the head of the table, Jimmy reaches over to your lap under the table and takes your hand in his. You look at him, trying to hide that he's affected you in any way. He gives you a small smirk, and rubs his thumb over yours for just a moment before letting your hand go.

Paulie takes his seat, and people start spooning food out of dishes and into their plates, and you're left wondering what just happened and what was meant by it.

Luckily, the rest of dinner was pretty uneventful, and the food was always so tasty. After everyone got their bellies full, everyone mingled wherever they liked around the house. Some went into the backyard to get a small bonfire going so some of the kids could have roasted marshmallows; some of the guys started inside the house and started pulling out cards and chips and stacks of money; many of the wives gather in the kitchen or the living room to talk all the latest gossip.

You notice Tommy, Jimmy, Henry, and Karen taking lowly and giggling with one another in a small circle. Normally they would've invited you over, so there's definitely something suspicious going on.

"(Y/N)!" Paulie says, waving you over, "come here, kiddo."

"Dad, I just finished college; I'm not really a kid anymore!" You give him a laugh and walk over to him.

He puts an arm over your shoulders and says, "Well, you'll always be my kid." He pauses for a moment before looking across the room and yelling, "Conway!"

The room quiets down, waiting for Jimmy's response. All of the guys and Karen turn to you and your dad. "Yes, Paulie?" Jimmy says with a smug look on his face.

"When you came in here, I didn't see you give my little girl any presents for her graduation. No cash, no cute little boxes with bows. What's the matter with you?" Paulie voice is raised so everyone can hear him. This is very odd behavior, as he normally handles things pretty quietly, so you know something is up.

"Well, ya see, Paulie..." Jimmy starts walking towards you, "I didn't hand her any envelope full of 50s, and I didn't give her any boxes with bows, because what I got for her was too big to fit through the front door." Jimmy lowers his voice to a whisper now that he's in front of you. "You wanna go see your present?"

You now realize that your dad and the guys are all in on some kind of surprise.

"Yes, please."

That's all Jimmy needs to hear before he's picking you up to take you outside. Henry and Tommy rush to the door to open it, and everyone that heard what was going on follows you outside to see what the surprise is.

You and Jimmy can't stop giggling while there are lots of hoots and hollers from everyone gathering outside with you. Jimmy lets you down and spins you around so you're facing the driveway. Sitting there is a beautiful black muscle car with a big gold bow on the hood.

He wraps his arms around your waist and whispers in your ear, "You like it, princess?"

"I- uh... yes," you can barely get a response out; you certainly weren't expecting this. Jimmy was all about handing out money and giving expensive gifts, but nothing like this... He didn't like to do anything that would put this kind of attention on him.

"It's the one you said you wanted right?"

"Yes, Jimmy. It's perfect," you say with a huge smile as you turn to hug him. "Thank you so much!"

"Anything for you, (Y/N)." Jimmy pulls a key out of his pocket and hands it to you. You take it from him and run over to unlock the car and climb in. Immediately, Tommy climbs in the front seat next you you and is shouting, "C'mon! Let's take this thing on a spin!!" Henry and Karen climb in the back seat and Henry only starts egging you on saying, "Let's crank this thing up and get outta here, (Y/N)!"

"Okay, okay! We'll drive it, but only if Jimmy comes too. He paid for the thing after all!"

"Jimmy! Get your ass over here!" Tommy yells before climbing in the back seat with Henry and Karen.

Jimmy runs over and gets in the passenger seat next you you. "Try not to kill us, okay?"

You turn the key in the ignition and the engine fires up loudly, which gets Henry and Tommy rowdy in the back seat. All the people in the front yard were raising their glasses and cheering as you backed out of the driveway! Before driving away from the house, you slowed down and Jimmy rolled down his window so Paulie could pop his head in.

"You guys be careful, and don't let anything happen to that one right there," he says pointing to you.

"Hell, Paulie, she's the one you gotta worry about!" Henry pipes up getting a laugh out of everyone.

"Yeah, well..." he chuckles, knowing it's true and realizing his little girl is all grown up. "Happy graduation, baby; go have fun!"

"Thank you, Dad! Love you!" you yell before driving off, a little too fast.

• • •

After you, the guys, and Karen, whom you had really grown to like, had been driving around a while, you decide to stop off at a small park while the sun sets. It's a cute little public park with a lake, a pavilion with tables for picnics, a small playground for kids (naturally the boys go and play on the playground), and lots of open space with soft grass.

With the boys being boys running around chasing each other, you and Karen get some time to talk alone.

"Seems like you've got Henry tied down pretty well. Takes a tough lady to do that."

"Yeah, well he stood me up on our second date, and so I told him off in front of his friends. We been together since."

"Oh yeah, word got back to me on that one. You had all the guys pretty shocked," you say though a laugh, "They made fun of him a good bit for it, so he must like you a lot if he put up with that."

"Yeah, I think he does." She pauses for a minute. "I've heard from some people that Henry always had a crush on you, and that everyone thought you two would end up together. I'm sorry if I got in the way of that."

"Oh, no! No need to apologize. Henry liked me when we were kids, and it feels like more of a joke now than anything. I don't think I could deal with him as well as you do," you give her a reassuring smile.

"So, you gonna give Jimmy a shot?"

"Hmm? What? You mean Jimmy and me?" You stutter out.

"Yeah, I mean, I know he's older, but it seems like he really likes you!"

"You think Jimmy likes me?"

"Well, yeah girl! He bought you ya dream car!" She says excitedly, her New York accent really shining through.

"Karen!" Henry calls from the playground.

"Whaddayou want?!"

"Come over here, honey!"

You see Jimmy walking towards you and Karen, and notice that Tommy is flirting with some poor girl who was just out for a run. Karen says a quick goodbye to you and heads over to the playground where Henry is waiting for you.

When Jimmy's feet stop in front of yours, he extends a hand to you to help you up from your spot on the grass. He places his hand on the small of your back, and his long fingers delicately begin to lead you in the direction of your new car.

"Did you have a fun time playing with your friends on the playground?" You poke a little fun at him.

"Would've had more fun if you were there," he raises his eyebrows and cracks a smile at you.

You laugh gently out your nose as you arrive at your car, "Whatcha bring me over here for?"

He takes you by the hips, lifting you up and placing you on the trunk of your car. He grabs your thighs and pulls you close to him, your knees brushing against either of his hips. "You like the car, angel?"

"Jimmy, wha-," you let out a shaky breath, "um, yes, it's beautiful."

"Mmmm, good." He brushes your hair behind your ear.

It suddenly becomes clear to you that what Karen had to say about Jimmy was true. In fact, with him standing between your legs like this, it couldn't be more obvious.

"Hey, Jimmy?"

"Yeah, baby doll?"

"Kiss me."

He raises his eyebrows, then looks at the ground for a moment. When he looks back up at you, he tangles a hand in your hair and presses his lips to yours softly at first, but he quickly deepens the kiss, exploring your mouth with his. You gently wrap one arm around his neck, and the other hand squeezes his waist through his shirt. He pulls you into him so your chest is pressed against his.

It feels weird kissing him, but it also feels right. Being with him like this feels like electricity, and you could feel like this forever and it still wouldn't be enough.

"Hey, hey, Jimmy!" Henry calls as him and Karen come up on you.

"Do not interrupt them!" You hear Karen say followed by a whap to Henry's arm.

Jimmy slowly pulls away from you, giving you probably the sweetest look you've ever seen him give. He pecks your lips a few more times before turning to Karen. "Thank you for hitting him."

You slide off the back of the car, putting your hand in Jimmy's.

"Listen, all I'm saying is, it's about time you got a kiss from her, you paid a lot of money for it!" Henry chuckles, slapping the trunk of your car.

"Listen, Henry Hill. I kiss who I want, when I want. And yes, I am grateful for the car, but Jimmy didn't buy my love," you cut your eyes at him.

"Yeah, that's right! What's the matter with you?" Karen backs you up.

Henry puts his hands up in surrender and tries to wipe the shit-eating grin off his face, "Alright, alright, geez!! Can someone go get Tommy so we can go home?"

Everyone gives him a look.

"Okay, fine! I'll go get him!" Henry jogs off to go get Tommy off that girl's back.

Funny enough, the girl ends up coming home with the group, Tommy landing another girl that he won't call in the morning. So you drop everyone off at their respective homes: Tommy and his girl at Tommy's place, Henry and Karen at Henry's place, and Jimmy invited you to his place. You knew Paulie would worry about you not coming home, but it would raise his blood pressure if he knew what you and Jimmy were up to.

It was really the lesser of two evils.