#but anyway i just thought this dialogue was funny and then this Version entered my mind and ive been laughing about it also

[couch-house]

funny cutscene joak

the cutscene in question

[ron456]

Rating the Broadway BMC soundtrack based on how fun it is to/ if you can do the macarena dance to it (literally no one asked for this 😭)

I made this cuz' me and my cast mates at my school will frequently do the macarena dance to songs while in the wings/or backstage (sometimes even while ON stage) . I've never been in a production of Be More Chill but I'm just judging based off experience and cuz I tested them 😭 (Yes, I did the macarena to all of these. My back hurts now but it was worth it for science). (Also, it's generally more fun to macarena to fast songs when your joking around backstage so yeah. That affected my rating too.) (Idk I was bored and sad and this came to mind so enjoy, I guess)

Jeremy’s Theme

2/10 there’s a little bit of macarena ability in the middle but eh, not really

More Than Survive

9/10 pretty good. Very fast macarena but fun. And it’s honestly fun to do it during the slower parts like the Christine part. And Michael’s Bob Marley part works pretty well with it. Jeremy’s slow part near the end does not work for it 😭. But regardless, it’s pretty good

I Love Play Rehearsal

4/10 some parts have a steady beat enough to do it but there’s a lot of tempo changes and pauses so you can’t do it that consistently. The parts that you could macarena to, though, were fun, so yeah.

More Than Survive Reprise

6/10 Honestly I was surprised by this one. It worked more than I thought it would 😭. Pretty steady 4/4 time signature (I think, idk Im not a professional). Some pauses, but if you keep macarena-ing, it pretty much works.

SQUIP Song

 4/10 Fast to slow to fast macarena. I guess the original macarena is pretty slow anyways but I’m so used to doing it fast backstage, that I can’t imagine it would be the first dance to come to my head if the SQUIP song was on.

Two-Player Game

5/10 Ehh, I had high expectations for this one but it was kinda boring to do the macarena to 😭. But, I mean, it has a generally steady beat except for that slow part at the end. So yeah, it works but it’s not that entertaining

The SQUIP Enters

0/10 I mean, obviously. It’s not even a song 😭. Just dialogue and frantic noise.

Be More Chill Part 1

3/10 Went from okay, to “no, this sucks”, and then it was pretty fun to macarena during the first part of “I saw it in the window…” but then it got bad again. So generally…not good.

Do you wanna ride?

6/10 Not too bad. Definitely not fun in the beginning cuz it’s too slow. But once it picks up, it works pretty well. The hip shimmy at the end of each macarena “set” (idk man 😭) goes well with this song actually. Made me giggle.

Be More Chill Part 2

5/10 Absolutely not in the beginning. But once things pick up, it’s alright. Kind of a snooze fest to do the macarena to cuz it’s kinda slow but it’s alright. Hurt me not to shimmy my shoulders during “You Wi-i-i-i-i-i-iL”.

Sync Up

6/10 Honestly, sorta fun 😭. Beat is pretty consistent and high energy. Also, it makes me realize that the songs with the “More Than Survive” like, motif, work pretty well for a fun, fast macarena 😭. Nothing too crazy but yeah. It’s good. (Side Note: I’m getting only slightly burned out by macarena-ing at this point)

Guy That I’d Kinda Be Into

6/10  Generally consistent except for the end. It’s fun. Again, nothing too crazy. Though, I would wanna see a version of this song where the ensemble is doing the macarena after I’ve tried it 😭.

The SQUIP Stalks

1.5/10 Very slow Macarena in the beginning. And then the rest you just…can’t. Like at all.

Upgrade 

4/10 Okay, I love this song so much but no 😭. Doesn’t work that much. I mean, you can at some parts but it’s not that enjoyable, I’d say. Other parts, you can’t do it at all or it has to be really, really slow. 

Loser Geek Whatever

6.8/10 Okay, this one, surprisingly, brought up my energy after macarena-ing to all these other damn songs. Like, it’s too slow at some parts but when it picks up, it’s lowkey kinda funny to do it and I could 100% imagine me and my castmates doing a dramatic macarena to this (There’s something about the sadder songs that are just more fun to do the macarena to idk).

Halloween

8.5/10 (I’m not gonna count the slow instrumental part in the beginning of this one cuz, like, it just transitions into, like, a whole completely different song so that doesn’t seem fair to include it.) Really fun. Could imagine myself macarena-ing on stage if I had the opportunity to. Especially during the dance break. I’m not surprised one of the big group dance number song works for this( when I did Beauty and the Beast, we would macarena so much as a joke during  “Be Our Guest”, that our director let Lumiere do it during the improv parts. This reminded me of that 😭😭).

Do You Wanna Hang

0.5/10 I sighed at the beginning of this one. Idk, I guess technically yeah you could, but it wouldn’t be consistent or fun. Especially considering the subject matter. Couldn’t imagine my castmates macarena-ing to this at all. It’s getting slightly higher than “The SQUIP Enters” cuz it’s an actual song but that is the only reason.

Michael in the Bathroom

(I did the Two Rivers one cuz I like that one better and I’m pretty sure the BPM is the same so yeah. idk. The rest are all broadway again.)

 10/10 Okay, wow. Next time I have a depressive episode, I am doing the macarena to “Michael in the Bathroom”. Like, oh my gosh, this was (weirdly) so f*cking fun 😭. Especially during the “Knock, knock..” part and the “I’m just Michael who’s a loner..” part. The slow parts aren’t too hard to do if you have good rhythm but yeah. As I said before, the sadder songs are really fun to macarena to. I could imagine me and my castmates doing the macarena to this. This song was weirdly cathartic to do this to. Was so fun I did it twice. 10/10. Would recommend it.

Guy That I’d Kinda Be Into (Reprise)

4/10 Again, I love this song but eh, not really. You sorta can, but it’s slow and you’d probably stop it after only a couple seconds. I could imagine me and my castmates doing the macarena to it, but, like I said, it wouldn’t last long without people getting bored.

The Smartphone Hour

5.5/10 Again, I had higher hopes for this one but it was just alright. Worked pretty well after the “Here we go!” part and was fun to do fast in the beginning, but there’s a fair amount of tempo changes or interruptions or pauses so you get tired/ bored easily. At least for me. I really love this song but ehhh… not for doing the macarena to. Idk. I’m losing my mind at this point.

The Pants Song

5/10 Too slow in the beginning to macarena😭And then when it picks up it feels a little too fast. Slightly overwhelming. Lowkey gave me anxiety to keep up. Idk

Pitiful Children

4/10 At the beginning I was like “oooo this works!” but then I got bored and also got a back cramp while doing it 😭😭. Idk. It’s alright. It’s repetitive, which I guess is how it should be for the macarena but, for me, the most fun part of doing the backstage macarena is having to adjust to the tempo just a little at times but not too much where it’s annoying or basically impossible. Hard to keep the energy up after a bit. This bored me eventually.

The Play

2.7/10 There is so much chaos going on during this 😭 Like, it’s fifty different reprises at once, I swear. Christine’s part is pretty fun and goofy to do it to, but everything else is mostly dialogue. I wanted to give it more points cuz Christine is in it but that didn’t seem fair so yeah.

Voices in My Head

5.8/10 I mean, ya know, it works for a majority of this song. Even some parts where Jeremy and Christine are talking. Gets a little too slow at one part. And then it’s way too fast to do the macarena at the end😭. So yeahhh. It’s a trip idk.

[amerricanartwork]

Y’know, I have a funny story with the ship between Innocence and Pebbles.

@eggobuggo , my sister, was playing The Sims and made the iterators in her own humanised forms, including her version of Innocence and Wind, along with Moon, Pebbles, NSH and Suns, all with their own personalities and stuff. She set up a generic apartment, put the gang in, and just had fun making them do silly shenanigans together, while I sit and watched her play.

In particular, we headcanon NSH, Pebbles and Innocence as Gen 3s, the newer modes, and so she made them into teenagers, which, with a DLC, have a whole new host of features that are not in the base game. This includes getting crushes (which weirdly enough, young adults and adults cannot get).

But anyway, one day, later into the game (the gang basically all were in the high end of the friendship scale with each other), the notif board popped up that Innocence had gotten a crush on Pebbles. Unfortunately for her, NSH and Pebs were already being all flirty with each other (Ragequit is where it’s at for us), making Pebble basically keep her in the friendzone. Ngl, my heart went out to her :,) Especially so, because they were all sharing a room. (space was tight)

After that, I began thinking about it in context of it in-universe, and ngl, I came to quite liking it as a ship, especially since I see Innocence to be less… asshole-ish (?), I guess, than what the general fandom makes her out to be (I mean it’s understandable, we only see her to leak the pic of Pebbles condition and that’s it.). To me and Eggo, she’s much nicer unless you really piss her off, which then, her more cynical and gossipy side of her comes out. She was actually more of on the friends side with Pebble before the shit went down.

At the time, I thought “dang, it’s a shame I won’t be seeing anything of it since she’s so obscure.”. This was a couple months before I began seeing art of them on the main tag.

Soooo… I guess I’m somewhat of an og Milkshake (as is the fandom name) shipper???

Just, seeing you and others make art about them is almost surreal in a way, since the only reason I really considered them as a ship was cuz of a random event in a life sim game lol.

Also @eggobuggo, I hope you don’t mind me sharing the story. :)

Wow, that seems like quite the story! And I do agree, after witnessing something like that in a totally different game it must be pretty surreal to see the ship gaining popularity in the actual RW fandom now too! It's nice to get another seal of approval from an original Milkshake shipper!

For me, it's also a bit strange because it's something I've considered for a really long time as a lingering "oh, wouldn't it be cool if I could make this work?" idea. The obscurity and lack of content for UI to draw inspiration from, both canon and fanon, definitely added to these feelings and the difficulty of imagining a working portrayal of the ship, hence I've only recently felt confident enough about the relationship and UI as a character to act on it. So after Pura coined the ship name and made a lot more art of it, then other artists started expressing approval and even drawing it themselves, it almost feels like I'm watching the ship enter the mainstream (Tumblr) fandom consciousness in real time, which is honestly pretty cool, especially since it feels like I had a hand in it with that initial ask! And even if I wasn't the very first to consider it, I'll definitely continue supporting this ship!

For some other thoughts though, I totally agree on Innocence not being mean in reality, though for me she's not mean or gossipy at all and more so has a kind-of opposite major flaw that tends to cause bad things unintentionally. As much as I can understand interpreting the character as a genuinely mean person, I thought it'd be interesting to imagine that her leaking the rot simply caused others to perceive her as mean, not that she's that way in reality. After all, I don't think we ever see direct dialogue from Innocence in canon, and the only evidence I can find of her being mean is Wind's speculation on her motivations. I also took inspiration from @shkika's Innocence, but I just wanted to see if I could take those ideas further to create my own unique interpretation.

Also, it's actually pretty coincidental you're telling me this too, because in regards to what I've come up for my Milkshake portrayal, Innocence having an unrequited crush on Pebbles for a really long time is actually really important for both plot and character arc reasons! I've been developing my own take on the classic worm-off-the-string iterator AU idea with @hail-strom for like the past week or so and the ship as of now plays a decent role in that, but the unrequited crush acts as subtle, yet major context for Innocence's actions throughout, which in turn slowly influence Pebbles especially as he starts to reciprocate those feelings (much to his alarm)!

Anyway, thanks for sharing that with me, and thanks for giving me a chance to ramble about this ship more! I'm honestly so happy to see it growing, and all support counts!

[1ore]

rotating blighted trahearne in my brain so that i can do basically anything but what I'm supposed to be doing.

one of the funny consequences of doing story missions on Yuri Six-Cants is that Trahearne is relegated to b-plot nonsense. The last one was Knight of the Thorn. now it's been the Season 4 Skyscale stuff.

as we know, everything that ever happens to blighted Trahearne in-game is canon, so my justification for this is that Mordy has been reading about Tyrian psychology to better understand the minds of heterotrophs. He is... hmmmmmm... a better mastermind at the macro scale than he is at the interpersonal scale. For him, this is like trying to have a dialogue with your body's individual cells. Anyway, he's learned about the concept of "self-parenting" and is taking it a little too literally.

Previously, it seemed like Trahearne and Mordremoth were becoming mentally "integrated" to the point of indistinguishable from one another... Or maybe Mordy was retreating from the conscious sphere and into the subconscious instead. Despite being better brain-roommates than they were six years ago, Trahearne is still not terribly enthusiastic about the idea of harboring a Dragon, and he keeps Mordy (or what he thinks of as Mordy) on a tight leash. Maybe it's easier for the Dragon to get what he wants if Trahearne thinks it's all his idea, or maybe the divisions between them are completely artificial, and what "Trahearne" conceives of as "Mordy" is just whatever thought/feeling he happens to dislike in the moment.

This whole Kralky business has driven a rift between them, though. The sparknotes version is this:

During Commander Six-Cants' ill-fated mission to kill and eat god defeat Balthazar, Mordy and Trahearne's interests align enough that the divisions between them dissolve. Yuri's death kind of seals the deal, because any uncertainty that Trahearne has about whether Mordremoth actually gives a shit vanishes when they involuntarily turn into a big dragon and have a dragon tantrum about his death.   (Incidentally, this is when Trahearne is the least opposed to the idea of trying to use his weird dragon powers for good, and also the most well put-together he's been in years. Involuntary dragon tantrum is humbling, but weirdly affirming. Since this happens in Elona, where nobody really knows who he is, he's not sinking under the weight of anyone's failed expectations but his own. Elona also has precedent for two (2) whole dragons that are sympathetic to Tyrian life, so this is like "yeah this might as well be happening" for the people around him. It Could Be Worse!)  

Things start to fall apart after Balthazar's death, when Kralky enters the picture. There is cognitive dissonance between what Mordremoth thinks of Kralkatorrik vs. Trahearne thinks of Kralkatorrik, which they can't reconcile.   Mordremoth feels empathy (or the closest thing a Dragon can feel to empathy) for his brother, who--like him--was betrayed by his own creations. And like him, there is a possibility that Kralky is about to experience the same incomprehensible sense of smallness that Mordy experienced at the hands of the Pact. Or death. Probably death!   Meanwhile, Trahearne has learned nothing from the past six years and wants to throttle that stupid purple lizard, because Kralkatorrik branded Commander Atropos. this is a whole thing we can't get into right now, but she's going to be ffffffffffine. probably  

This leaves them as two distinct minds again. Mordremoth pulls away to try to reach out to his brother, while Trahearne returns to his old marching orders. They are briefly reunited after Aurene's death (dragon tantrum.........2!) but this falls apart after the Pact's final campaign against Kralky.  

Which brings us back to Season 4 Skyscale b-plot: Mordy and Trahearne are baffled that things seemed to be going relatively well, and then fell apart in such confusing ways. Mordy doesn't get why it's such a big deal that there is a division between them again (didn't you hate the idea of assimilation?) and Trahearne is still reeling from the whirlwind of emotions (his own and Mordy's) that colored every interaction with Kralky.

Mordremoth's concern for his brother dredges up Trahearne's unresolved guilt about being estranged from the Pale Tree, the other Firstborn, and the Sylvari at large. Recognizing this, Mordy is like. Ohhhhhhh. I see. My errant root saddled you with impossible expectations. I know how to fix this. <- about to make it worse

The Dragon's bumbling efforts to unpack Trahearne's baggage are rebuffed until, I think, Mordy accrues enough energy to manifest on his own, physically apart from Trahearne. He might be a useless little dough creature at first, but in Trahearne's mind, this is a complete disaster and he has to contain it. Things really start to fall apart when Mordy takes more elaborate shapes in response, under the mistaken assumption that Trahearne's engagement in this means it's "working."

Trahearne ends up going down that old "I am alone and I am a failure and I can't even be the prison of an Elder Dragon correctly" spiral. The only thing more mortifying than having a psychic breakdown in front of the Dragon (who is also you) is having a psychic breakdown in front of the Dragon (who is also comforting you.)

something something this nugget of Pale Tree dialogue:

Now do you see? The Pale Tree's voice was faint and distant, but it snapped Ceara back to viewing the tree from a distance. If you are not one with what you were born to be, you are lost. Worse, you are dangerous.

if you can't find unconditional love at the Grove, homemade is fine ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[girinma]

i've been lazy with posting this but finished two books on my last boat trip so my thoughts on Kraken by China Miéville and Under Ground by Megan Marsnik.

Kraken

another jacob geller recc and my least favorite of the 3 i've read. Museum specimen collection boy Billy gets his giant squid stolen and enters a world of urban fantasy. It's a fun romp though really good worldbuilding but the central plot ultimately falls flat. 7/10

I don’t understand where breaks between paragraphs are. The scene won’t change nor will the POV character. Why is there a blank line. It feels like it was a web serial and these were breaks from that but if so why maintain them in the print version? Also there will be an indent for dialogue when both lines are by the same person. Why????

Also while I liked the realism of the dialogue it was sometimes difficult to read because of the way things were written as if someone literally said them combined with the accents. Sorry for being anglophobic.

Under Ground

I don’t understand how this book came to a Charleston used book thing when it is so Minnesota regional? A mystery. Anyway it's the 1910s, Katya leaves Slovenia because her parents die and she moves in with her aunt and uncle in Minnesota. but uh oh! the iron mines fucking suck so the miners are going to go on strike. surely the management will be willing to negotiate. right? it's based on an actual strike which is neat. 6/10

In general it's very easy to read and reminded me of grapes of wrath. This is obviously not an Author Author so I cut her slack but there are multiple points where you can tell she’s basically recounting a real thing because it does not fully mesh with the narrative sections. Forrest Gump esque scenes.

I would have appreciated a map of Minnesota because I ain’t been there but also I don’t know how this book escaped Minnesota so ?

For a book about unions, it was Not Socialist Enough. I wanted more vitriol. It tries to paint a happy ending at the end but I think it should be more call to action. “These people will kill you and nothing will ever happen and they keep getting away with it.”

Loved the focus on women, very good. Yes comment on the unpaid household labor the girlies are doing so their husband can work twelve hours in the mine. A shift that long and in that time period? Couldn’t survive without a woman doing everything else in your life.

Boardinghouse is such a good setting. It had a great cast of characters and was very natural to have everyone around. I know they were real but I think it worked really well for the story.

I’ve realized I’m pretentious and don’t really like historical fiction. Like yeah I’ll read it but if I want to read a book set in the past I’ll just read a book from the time period…

Overall it was fine. Not super memorable but it was obviously a passion project so yay Megan happy you finished it and got published :)

AND spoilers under the cut as usual

KRAKEN

The ending is… I don’t know. I like it in some ways and not in others. It did a good job calling back to the beginning and I think it’s very funny to bring The Christian God into this polytheistic world. That being said, I don’t think Vardy’s plan was foreshadowed enough in the middle? As soon as he disappears it’s obvious what’s happening but before that it wasn’t really there beyond the beginning. Also I don’t get it. Ok, he pushed the squid apocalypse forward as cover for his actions? But how did he get Griz to want to steal the squid? I think Vardy giving him the idea should have been made explicit.

I wish the author went more meta with the Griz fight. Like, the book is printed in ink and he is ink! Use that! The author already has some fun with page breaks and italics n such, so put some strikethroughs when Griz is editing reality to delete things and have Billy use footnotes to put things back in. House of Leaves this. Also if he did this he could add like a scene that’s partially destroyed by the memory fire. Literally just add a REDACTED or something.

The little epilogue/finale sucked. Just pairing off characters in straight pairings as if billy and saira or collingswood had anywhere near the relationship of billy and Dane. make it gay. Dane also got a shit ending he should have died with more fanfare. I think the book should have just ended after the cops came and arrested people.

As I said before the worldbuilding is wonderful I love every little concept he comes up with. The gunfarmers are my favorite but it’s all very fun yet aware of the eccentricity. yes everyone has themes weapons and yes people complain about it to their leaders because guns would be more effective BUT NO. The familiar strike and Wati in general was also very fun. Leftist king.

I really dislike Billy’s arc? He starts out interesting - refusing the call, he’s a funny little academic thrust into the world of fantasy. I like how long he’s sad that Leon died but I wished he had more to say about him. Like little things reminding him of Leon and not just reliving the moment he died. But as he comes to accept his role he becomes very much a vehicle of the plot. He becomes simply Hero without ever really using his skills (no preserving no squid knowledge no biology knowledge) and even though yes he lies a bit he isn’t A Liar. He does a little taxonomy at the end with Griz but I want more. He gets a phaser and then he just does what other people tell him. It’s like the author forgot Billy could have any knowledge from before the story started.

Under Ground

Everything after the bar shoot out is rushed but doesn’t go straight to epilogue? Like there was a struggle to wrap things up when the strike fails in real life and nothing good happens ever.

The romance was cuuuuute very cheesy in a This is a Book for Women ;) way but overall it was good. I will take Katka’s “this guy is sooo hot I’m immediately in love with him and will fantasize about him for years before he comes back from prison for being anti-American” over Billy’s “I need to fuck a magician let me call all the women I know.” I did wish there was more of a honeymoon period and not just Paul coming back and being like “I’m also madly in love with you yayayay” because if he got to know her he would have loved her. She is not just some Slovenian girl but she also works on an independent newspaper and does journalism!! His union leader ass would love her pro-labor reporting.

Katka is kind of a bland character though. I KNOW it’s 1915 but she literally is only an individual because she 1. Can type and 2. Likes guns. Could she have a fucking flaw? She needed inner conflict - have her be against the strike and come to view it as necessary, or maybe she’s depressed due to her parents dying and doesn’t see why she should care about the future. She needed something going on Internally beyond “paul <3”

[lokiondisneyplus]

Holy crap. Look at Kate Herron's shirt. When the Loki director pops up on Zoom, she's donning the most glorious image anyone will see since we laid eyes on Alligator Loki: A Teletubby wearing the Loki horns. Are the Teletubbies Loki variants? Sure, why not!

"I got it on Instagram," Herron says. "There's an amazing comic book artist and he designed it. He made it into a T-shirt for me because I saw it and was like, 'That's incredible. Can I get it for the press junket?'"

Herron, no big deal, just pulled off an MCU miracle. Entering a mammoth franchise with, notably, some of Sex Education's best episodes under her belt, the director deftly brought a plot involving multiverses and Richard E. Grant in a cape and superhero mumbo-jumbo to brilliant, beautiful life. Following Loki's tear-jerking, mind-bending finale, the series has been dubbed by critics and fan's alike as one of Marvel's best efforts—which is no small feat. Of course, we needed to ask Herron how she stuck the landing. Following the most epic finale you, me, or any Teletubby can remember, Herron talked to Esquire about the Miss Minutes jump scare, filming the finale's introduction of He Who Remains, and why she won't return for Season Two of Loki.

ESQ: How are you doing?

KH: I'm good. I think I feel very relieved that I don't have to sit on the secret of He Who Remains anymore, It was a very big secret to hold, but for an important reason, right? Because it's such a good character to be launching. So yeah, I feel good.

ESQ: Loking back at your old interviews, you have such a good poker face when you're avoiding spoilers, but you're also incredible at giving aggregator crumbs.

KH: I play a lot of board games, so you need to be quite good at strategy and poker faces so people can't always read your hand. So I think weirdly board games have prepared me more for working with Marvel than anything else.

ESQ: I have to start with the Miss Minutes jump scare. What went into the decision to make her a memeable, creepy apparition in that moment?

KH: I love horror, and my executive, Kevin Wright, knew that. Me and him were talking about Episode Six and I remember that he was like, "Oh, maybe you could do something creepy of Miss Minutes." And I immediately was like, "We have to do a jump scare!" Because I haven't got to do a good jump scare in anything yet and I really wanted to, because a lot of my friends are horror directors. I was like, "I can't let them down." So I was really excited to have a shot at doing a jump scare. And Miss Minutes, it was really fun testing it because we'd kind of bring different people into the edit, me and Emma McCleave, the editor, and we'd just play it for them, watch them, and check that they were jumping when we cut it.

ESQ: One thing that I think is getting missed in all the craziness is that we see a peak moment of the love story between Loki and Sylvie. Where does the finale leave the companionship that they found in each other?

KH: When I started the show, that was always in the DNA of it—that Loki was going to meet a version of himself and they were going to fall in love. And that's honestly what drew me into the story, because I directed Sex Education. I love stories about self-love and finding your identity and your people. Loki is such a broken character when we join him, and seeing him go on this amazing journey with all this growth and finding the good points of himself in seeing her—I think that was very beautiful. It's also paying respect to the fact that Sylvie's in a very different place to him. She hasn't had the Mobius therapy session. She even says, in Episode Five, "I don't know how to do this. I don't have friends." You really feel for her because she has been on the run and her whole life has been this mission.

It's almost funny because these characters are thousands of years old, but it's almost teenage the way they both talk about their feelings for each other. I think everyone can relate to that, right? In any new relationship, there's always that kind of awkwardness and like, "Oh God, am I too keen? The important thing was the hope—like when Sylvie and him kiss, I think it is genuine and it is coming from a place of these feelings they have for each other. Obviously she does push them through that door, but for me it was a goodbye and it was with heart. But it's kind of a goodbye in the sense of like, I care about you, but I'm going to do my mission because that's where I'm at.

ESQ: I would pay for you to direct the Sex Education episode where Otis falls through a portal into the multiverse, into the main MCU.

KH: He really looks like a Loki as well, which is so funny. I always thought that. I was like Asa does look like a Loki. It didn't come to pass or anything, but it would be interesting to do a Sex Ed-Marvel crossover. I wonder who all the different characters would be within the MCU, but it would be quite funny.

ESQ: You're right, he could pull off a teenage Loki.

KH: Yeah, like a teen or a very young ’20s, maybe. But it was just funny because I was like, "Oh yeah, he looks a bit like Tom." I wonder how they could do it. I'm sure they'll find a way to do a crossover anyway.

ESQ: Can you just take me back to filming with Jonathan Majors? And you capturing him in such a compelling, quirky, scary way—I'm sure your direction was such a big part of that.

KH: I was just so excited because Jonathan is an actor that everyone was so excited about. He's like a chameleon in everything he does and he's so talented. I just feel as a director so lucky to have worked on this because I feel like I've got to work with some of the best actors out there. And when you're with Jonathan, you know you're in the presence of just someone really magnificent. For me as a director, it's giving him the space to play and feel safe. Because we filmed it all in a week, but it was a lot to film in a week. So I think it was really about creating a space where he could have fun and find this character because he's going to be playing him for a long time.

ESQ: What went into the decision to introduce us to the good guy first?

KH: I remember in the script, he comes up the elevator and it was so casual. I was like, "Oh man, that's so fun." And then Jonathan, when he plays it, he's relaxed. And I the thing he used to talk about a lot was that this is a character who's been on his own for a long time. Because at the beginning, we introduced him in a space in the universe that feels like this very busy, loud place, but actually, when we see the Citadel, he's surrounded by the Timeline and he's very isolated. Even in his costume with [designer] Christine Wada, for the idea of his outfit, he's a character who's existed for multiple millennia. So it's like, OK, let's pull from lots of different places so you can't necessarily pin down which time or which place he might be from. Also the fact that his clothes look comfy. They were like pajamas because he's living at home. He loved the idea of the office [being] the only finished part of the citadel and that the rest of the citadel was like this Sunset Boulevard kind of dusty, dilapidated space. And just again showed that he probably just keeps himself to his office. All those elements definitely fed into Jonathan's performance in terms of balancing the extrovert, but also the introvert of someone that would be living by themselves and only talking to a cartoon clock.

ESQ: It really is incredible how you pull a nail-biting finale with this battle of wits and dialogue.

KH: It was really exciting because I feel like Episode Five was a lot of fun because we got to play into all the joy of the different versions of Loki, but also just the fact that it was our big usual Marvel third act, right? Like it was where our big spectacle was as they were fighting this big monster. But I love that our finale bookends, right? We began with a conversation and we ended with one.

ESQ: I also loved that there was no end-credits scene—I think it makes the ending that much more impactful. Was there ever an end credit scene on the table, or any kind of a stinger?

KH: I think no, because weirdly, we never went after the kind of mid-credit sequences. I think we always just were thinking just of the story and where we knew we wanted it to end. For example, Episode Four, originally Loki was deleted and then we went straight to him waking up. And it was only in the edit I was like, “I think it'd be really cool actually. We should move that scene to mid-credits because then we'll really feel like Loki has died." Because if I watched that moment and then it went to the credits, I'd be like, "What?!" And then when we were talking about the best way to talk about Season Two, we were like, "Okay, well, let's do that like a little mid-credits at the end because that is exciting to confirm it in that way." I'd say we found both of those in the edit just because we wanted to kind of do it right and have a fun nod to something that Marvel does so well.

ESQ: Is there anything you can tell about the future of the story you've told here—or even where you personally would like to go with the studio or otherwise going forward?

KH: Yeah, so I'm just on for Season One. So I'm so proud of the story we told. I mean, it was amazing getting to set up the TVA and take Loki on this whole new journey. And I mean, I think we've left so much groundwork for his character, and as people see in the comics, there's so much more to be delved into. And I just am excited honestly to just see where all the characters go. Like, who is B-15? What did she see in those memories and where did Ravonna go and where is Loki? I think for me, we've set up these questions and I look forward to seeing them being answered as a fan in the next season.

ESQ: Absolutely. Well, can we please work on the Asa Butterfield Loki?

KH: I will call him and I'll be like, "You want to do some crazy Marvel crossover?"

[mirrorgrets]

Teyvat, the twins, and the Archons: a theory

Hello today I will be explaining my genshin impact theory which is most likely right because I say so and I have an inflated ego

Note: I will be referring to the MC as traveler and the Leader of the Abyss Order as such or as the missing twin for neutrality’s sake. And also because I chose Lumine and I can’t bear to say Lumine is “evil”

Note after writing all of that: Actually, I’m wrong. Reading it made me realize how batshit off the rails it all sounds. But here it is anyways because it’s a funny theory.

Contains multiple spoilers for the entirety of the game (1.3 edition)

Part 1. Gnosticism, Archons, and Humanity

I think by now, most of us have heard of the Gnosticism theory. If you haven't heard of it, Gnosticism is the belief that humanity could be more than what we are at present because of the world we're in.

Gnosticism has many versions but the basic concept of it is that humans are stuck in a fake world where our full potential is locked away because of our belief in false gods. The true God is the creator of the true world and between us and him, are beings called Aeons. One Aeon who is called Sophia (meaning Wisdom) created a being who thought of himself as the One True God and created the physical world in his flawed image. Oh, and he gave seven beings rule over the world he created, who are called the Archons.

Under Gnosticism, humans are thought to be part physical, but also have a spiritual component in us that grants us divinity. But because the false god and archons actively work to make sure we never realize that there is divinity within us, we never reach our full potential.

Connecting this with genshin impact, the humans in Teyvat have access to visions that give them power, as well as a chance to attain godhood. However, they believe that it is a gift from Celestia instead of a thing any of them can attain themselves. In fact, they don't even know that if one "receives" a vision, they can become gods because it's a secret that only Archons are privy to. Venti says this himself at the end of the prologue section of the main storyline when we ask him about visions.

It seems like Celestia doesn’t want humans to ascend to godhood. If we pair this  with what we know from the Main Storyline trailer that Dainsleif narrates, it becomes clearer. He says that Celestia goads humans with their seven treasures, rewards for the worthy, the doorway to divinity. However, it seems like there is a warning for those who dare to try and ascend, as if they say that the throne in the sky is not for us even if we have the means to.

Doesn’t that seem to contradict the purpose of the vision? Yes, it is a means to help humans live in Teyvat, but why give out visions when the Archons know fully well that it could help them gain access to Celestia? Doesn't it then seem like visions are not gifts from the Archons but instead innate power that all humans possess?

Part 2. What are the twins + What is Dainsleif + What are they doing in Teyvat + the Genesis Pearl = A Loop

Most signs point to the idea that the twins are actually older than they look. It seems like Lumine and Aether landed in Teyvat at least 500 years ago during the cataclysmic event that wiped out Khaenri’ah.

Going back to the idea of Gnosticism, the true God sends out Messengers of Light to the false world to guide the humans to their full potential. And we see traveler helping their companions ascend further, reaching their fullest potentials when they “max out.”

Furthermore, it doesn’t seem like they’re human. During the 1.2 Dragonspine event, Albedo does tests on us, and though he doesn’t tell us his complete findings, he alludes that we are like him, created from a substance that is yet to be defined. This goes off from the theory that he’s a homunculus, created from chalk, purified soil, the building block of the world. Aside from that, after our fight with Childe, one of the dialogue options after he mentions the fact that traveler can use both anemo and geo, is that they’re slowly gaining back their true power.

And of course, when the twins first enter the world, they have actual wings which were stripped by the Unknown God. Doesn’t seem very human to me.

So, if the travelers are Messengers of Light, then why is that not their main goal? Based on the We Will Be Reunited trailer, when the Abyss Mage mentions the traveler to the missing twin, their face looks shocked, like they just remembered that they have a twin. There’s desperation in their steps when they rush to the cliff to see their twin again, like it’s been so long since they’ve seen their sibling who they literally forgot. I think that aside from stripping them of their power, the Unknown God also took away some of their memories.

So the missing twin might remember the actual purpose as to why they’re in Teyvat, but didn’t remember their sibling until recently, and traveler remembers their sibling but doesn’t remember the reason why they were in Teyvat in the first place (or they do but that isn’t their main concern since they’re putting their sibling first).

So how does Dainsleif relates to this particular segment? Well, in another version of Gnosticism, Aeons come in pairs. Sophia’s partner was Jesus. Now, in the Main Storyline trailer, Dainsleif alludes to a woman when at the very end of the video where he says “My memory has all but faded completely, but I will always remember, how she too loved these flowers.” The flowers are the flowers Lumine especially likes, the ones she adorns in her hair. A flimsy connection it may be, but a connection nonetheless.

Now, I’ve seen theories about Dainsleif being an older version of Aether, but that theory doesn’t hold water if you choose Lumine as your traveler or if you consider the fact that Dainsleif and Aether don’t share the same eye color. Yet, it’s not completely off. There are thirty Aeons in total, although this number can differ in other versions of Gnosticism.

Now, in Dainsleif’s quest, we immediately question this stranger as he is somehow omniscient, if we haven’t already questioned him with all his narration in the Collected Miscellany videos where he hints that he knows more than we do. I will say it now: I think that Dainsleif takes upon the role of Jesus.

I could be wrong. But I think I’m right. For now.

In another version of Gnosticism, Jesus goes to the false world and saves Sophia, as she forgets who she is, she forgets her divinity and is stuck there. If we follow the theory that Dainsleif is actually the second heir from the Gnostic Chorus teaser, and that he is searching for the Genesis Pearl. The Genesis Pearl symbolizes the beginning and purity that is incorruptible. This could be the essence of Sophia, the lost Aeon who incidentally created the false god.

Back to the Main Storyline trailer, Dainsleif says that the war has already begun, and that is just a continuation of past battles. We could take this in a sense that the conflict has reached its boiling point and that it was only because all these problems were left alone for too long. However, we could also consider the possibility that Dainsleif has lived through whatever the twins are going through right now because he is the first Messenger of Light to step foot in Teyvat.

We can also look into Dainsleif’s name, which is a Nordic name, actually written as Dáinsleif. This means Dain’s Legacy which is the sword of King Högni, which aided him in a never ending battle that went on until Ragnarok.

It seems like the twins are repeating a cycle that has already happened to Dainsleif and whoever the unknown woman who also likes the flowers the missing twin likes. All four of them are Aeons or Messengers of Light.

So who is that woman? I have no idea. It could the unknown god but that feels like a stretch. The unknown god might actually be the demiurge, the false god that created Teyvat and the seven Archons, and not Sophia herself. It could also be Paimon who might have some kind of relation to the unknown god, whether it be that she is the unknown god, or she is a being from Celestia. Either way, both feel like shaky theories.

But of course, Mihoyo is only taking inspiration from Gnosticism and several other sources which could lead them to take creative liberties when applying it to the game.

Part 3. The Abyss Order and Khaenri'ah: war crimes against humanity

Going back to my point about the twins’ original goal to why they went to Teyvat in the first place, let’s question why the missing twin joined forces with the Abyss Order and began to lead them to burn the throne of Celestia.

While we don't hear the missing twin mention Celestia in the We Will Be Reunited trailer, the only other time a throne is mentioned is in the Main Storyline trailer when Dainsleif mentions that Celestia does not want humans to ascend to take up a throne in the sky.

Back to the safety of the game's actual lore, we understand that Kaenri'ah is a godless nation that might have underwent a calamity that might have killed off most of its people since they were closer to understanding the truth, and were technologically advanced, compared to the other nations of Teyvat. An alchemist named Gold ultimately led to this cataclysm due to their greed for seeking erudition.

It is safe to assume that Celestia wiped out Khaenri'ah and all the technology they created. We could also assume that the people were all killed, yes, but it would be better to assume they were cursed instead. Into what though?

The hilichurls.

In the archive section of the game, under the books, there's quite a lot written about the hilichurls, thanks to Jacob Musk. The author describes the hilichurls to be drawn to old relics of the past, with even attempts to recreate it. Their way of lifestyle is even described, and it looks like they worship the element itself and not the Archons who represent it.

Doesn't it seem like the hilichurls have a connection with the ancient civilization of the past? Not to mention their strange connection to the elements in which shaman hilichurls (samachurls) can harness the elements without the use of a vision? If I am correct with my theory, then hilichurls were once citizens of the bygone Khaenri'ah who discovered they could harness the elements without an Archon's blessing that came in the form of a vision.

It doesn't feel too surprising considering that for monsters, hilichurls are quite smart. They even display human-like characteristics. In the game, we see them dancing, sleeping, just minding their own business in general. They have their own architecture and their own language. In the Hilichurl Cultural Customs book, we even discover that hilichurls are not as barbaric as they are made out to be as they have leaders who decide their policies and course of action. It's as if they have their own culture.

Ultimately, the hilichurls are part of the Abyss Order. The organization's main goal is to get undermine Celestia's rule, and at this point of this mess I call a theory, doesn't that make them stand in a position where nothing is painted as black and white as it seems. Yes, they do heinous things like steal, possibly murder, and set off a dragon on Mondstadt, but it looks like they're operating through a "the end justifies the means" kind of morality.

And the missing twin shares this sentiment. As they had seen what Celestia had done to Khaenriah 500 years ago before the beginning of the prologue, their desperation grows. Their war with destiny will not stop until Celestia falls because it is their ultimate mission. Traveler has taken up the safer side of this war, wherein they help the humans but the missing twin has taken up the side of fallen humans. This is why they're not evil per se; just going through questionable steps to achieve a righteous goal.

Part 4. Teyvat and its Archons

Based on all that, it seems like I’m painting the Archons to be the bad guys. I am. They wiped out an entire civilization on the basis that they might learn the truth of the world, and their uncanny closeness to Celestia.

But we like Venti and Zhongli, right? Of course we do! However, they were still complicit in the downfall of Khaenri'ah and the limitation of humanity in Teyvat.

To start, Venti had his gnosis was forcibly taken from him. He doesn't seem to mourn over that (although he could be hiding it) and it looks like he can still present himself in a godly manner as we see in Venti's quest when he revealed himself as Barbatos to Stanley. When we spend time with him under the tree of Vennessa, while he divulges the secrets of Celestia to us, he still seems to comply with them. This could be chalked up to the fact that ultimately, he is Mondstadt's Archon and also the weakest of the seven. We could also consider the fact that at the time of Khaneri’ah’s downfall, he was in Dragonspine with Dvalin, dealing with Durin.

With Zhongli, it becomes a bit more interesting. He gave away his gnosis under the agreement of a contract we do not know the details of. But why he did? Why not because of his regret as the geo Archon and of love? Zhongli once ruled over Guili Plains with another god named Guizhong, the god of dust. Guizhong loved their people but perished during the Archon War. He then moved their people to Liyue Harbor and in her place, began to love them. Although he is stilted with the way he deals with his people, we see that he cares. Over the years, he has grown soft and shed the persona of Morax, a god who dealt with war. He says this himself and it feels like his ability to care extends beyond that of Liyue. It's possible he gave up his gnosis because he understands what the Tsaritsa is doing and what she's fighting for.

The Tsaritsa is the cryo Archon and the god of love. However, according to Tartaglia, she had to harden herself to go through with her plan. But what is her plan but an act of love for humanity? Wiping out Khaenri'ah could've opened her eyes to the inherent cruelty of Celestia. The timeline makes sense because Venti said that 500 yers ago, he knew her well but now, not so much. It’s at that point she loses whatever loyalty she had for Celestia. She had to steel herself and begin her plans to overthrow Celestia, which involves taking the gnoses of the six other Archons to fight the false god and alleviate humans from the hell they are in. That is her way of showing her love to humanity.

Teyvat is only a false world. We have seen many instances of this being hinted at like when Katheryne of the Adventurer’s Guild says “rebooting” or “error” as if she is only a program, or when Scaramouche says that the sky and the stars are all fake. Even in the game, if you take a closer look at the stars, it feels fake, as if it is a dome that traps the humans in Teyvat. Even more unsettling, when going deeper within the Spiral Abyss, the more stars you see which could mean Teyvat is actually upside down and that go deeper within the Spiral Abyss, we are ascending closer to the true world.

What greater act of love could the Tsaritsa commit other than giving humanity the truth?

Part 5. In conclusion: none of this makes sense

To summarize my main points:

Genshin Impact takes a lot from the mythos of Gnosticism

Visions are not gifts from the Archons but an inherent power from humans that come from their own "divinity"

The twins and Dainsleif are related in some manner

The twins are repeating a cycle that Dainsleif has already been through

The twins are suffering some kind of memory loss

The twins are in Teyvat to help humans realize their power

Celestia is not heaven but more like hell

Teyvat is a false world

The Tsarita is actually good

The Abyss Order is a morally grey organization

Archons are bad

This could all be wrong as this is only a theory. But the connections I pointed out make a bit of sense. There’s still more lore to uncover as we’ve only unlocked two regions and the Pale Princess and the Six Pygmies only have one volume out so far (this book is important because an Abyss Mage says that there is a lie within it) so this could all be debunked when new regions are unlocked.

Still, it’s a pretty fun theory to believe in at the moment. Thank you for reading this mess I call a theory!

[heyjude19-writing]

Im the list anon again and boy do I have more for you but this time I also have some questions as well if your time allows and you are willing to answer of course. First with the other things I loved:

1) the fact that Ron warmed up to Draco so quickly! I genuinely think thats so much in character. Ron is not a distrustful person and as a middle child as they come is very easygoing and would for sure make stupid jokes at Draco

2) The patronus. My god the Patronus. I seriously put the phone down and made a small slow clap during that chapter. At first I was like hmmmm *insert unsure kombucha girl face* because almost all fanfics have him with a dragon patronus and leave it at that (and lets be honest at this point my expectations of you were quite high dont blame me blame your bloody brilliant writing) but then, and I dont know if you did this on purpose or not (I have a feeling you did) but the fact that the dragon was the same (pale white) wounded but still feral dragon that Hermione FREEED (!) from a bank (£££) dungeon, malnourished and used for its nature, surrounded by darkness, wealth and misery!! And it was Hermione who broke its chains!!!!! Is just *chefs fucking kiss* slow clap*

3) the way you describe sex scenes are so natural! Ive never read a fanfic or book that doesnt make me gag a little bit (I am not a fan of smut at all but ill go with it because of a good story) until I read yours. Its so simple but yet intricate and you make the entire act so intriguing and normal and intimate. Bravo.

4) I LOVE SASHA. I love that Theo fell for her head over heels and the way you portrayd her reminded me of a friend of mine who works as a sous-chef in London so I always pictured her when reading it!

5) Dracos inner voice is ON POINT. Like I genuinely think you shoud own the rights to that character now.

6) Ill say it again. I love Ginny. You should also own the rights to her character too.

7) my interest for Quiddich (even when reading the books/wathcing the movies) was on par, if not lower than Hermiones. You managed to get me interested in that too so yes another slow clap to you

7.1) Also such a clever career for Draco!! Made si much sense!

Now to some questions

A) What was the deal with Malfoy referring to Ginny as Weasly and refusing to aknowledge her Potter surname. And why did everyone kept correcting him? It was hilarious granted but I wanted to know whether the reason you included this time and time again had to do wih something deeper? Or was this included as just a funny recurring joke?

B) Why did you choose for Draco to have a “fantasy” to produce a patronus and not for example for him to have had to do that after theyd exchanged “i love yous”. Very interesting angle and i liked that it was sort of a loophole to all the ‘death eaters cant have patronuses’ but quite curious on the thought process

C) Why did you opt for Draco to remove his mark? Do you think that stands as reward for him more or for Hermione? Very smart solution by the way

D) if you have the time- Could you please elaborate a tad more on what the soul-bonding means? Why was it so taboo? At furst hand it seems like a very romantic/amazing thing to do with your partner right?

Lastly- Do you ever itch to make a second part to this? And in the most acceptable case that you dont, I always wondered what you had in mind for them in the future- because of the soul bonding thing, you mentioned that the generational curses will be erased, which means I guess that the Malfoys can have more than one child now, and girls as well. (I cannot believe im asking for this as I am the one to avoid any pregnancy fanfics but) do you imagine them with children and if yes, how many? How do they integrate muggle devices(I know youd agree wit me that Hermione would definitively bring some muggle stuff over!) and which devices would Draco really secretly like?

Pleasewriteasecondpartwhereyouelaborateyourthoughtsonthisthankyou.

Ok rant done. :D

List anon! You’re back with another amazing ask. I’ll do my best!

1.) I like to think Ron matured a lot post-war (not enough to stop making terrible jokes, though.)

2.) Regarding your beautiful analysis of my specific dragon breed for Draco’s patronus: How many points would you like for your Hogwarts house of choice? I will add that according to Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, the Ironbelly’s scales are normally a metallic grey. I will also add that I subscribe more to book canon than movie canon. In the book version of events of the Gringotts escape, Harry breaks the chains and Hermione (with eventual help once the boys catch on) destroys the ceiling so it can have a way out. The partially blind dragon does the rest of the work on its own.

3.) Thank you, that’s very flattering.

4.) Does your friend also get you into fancy restaurants and can they make salted caramel bread pudding???

5.) Thank you, it was one of my favorite aspects of writing this story.

6.) Thank you, she’s so fun to write and flesh out from her book portrayal.

7.) Haha, I felt so validated by that line of dialogue in Cursed Child when Draco tells Harry he wanted to play quidditch professionally, but wasn’t good enough.

Now to some answers:

A.) It’s definitely a recurring joke. It’s up to the reader to interpret Draco’s actions here: is he doing it to be a massive troll? Or is he genuinely not retaining the information of her married name because he considers this fact so unimportant that he does not bother to keep it in his brain? Troll, snob, or both, you can decide!

B.) I’ll address the second part of this first, because it was not intended as a loophole. I 1000% do not understand the “death eaters can’t have patronuses” thing. It makes absolutely no sense. Snape has a Patronus. But beyond that… Umbridge has a Patronus (a cat). If we’re letting that woman have a Patronus, then yeah, I think Draco can cast one. As for the vision that Draco used to conjure it… up to you whether that’s a fantasy or a glimpse of a certain ritual actually working. Draco’s thoughts on the matter: “An image of such striking tangibility that he might have already lived it, or perhaps experienced time in such a way that he lived it now.”

C.) I wanted Draco to have a choice, obviously a recurring theme for him in RN. For my characterization of him, that symbol on his arm causes him nothing but shame and self-loathing (see the end of chapter 36 during his heart-to-heart with Hermione). He’d already exercised almost every known avenue to rid himself of it before Hermione entered his life (he lists these in chapter 44). Hermione already loved him (and has told him so) by the time she’s figured out how to remove it: “I love the man you are today and I will love that man tomorrow, bare forearm or not. I simply wanted you, for once, to have the choice. It’s your body.”

D.) Ooh anon, you are tempting me here. I really hate to be coy, but you might see some future writing on this very topic.

I can at least answer the taboo part: I think soul magic in general (horcruxes, the use of unicorn blood) is quite taboo in the HP universe. As no one knows what happens after death (not even ghosts, Nearly Headless Nick says as much when Harry asks him point-blank in OoTP) I think most magical folk would think the intense ritual (blending magical cores) an unnecessary thing anyway. As Draco explains in chapter 48, since no one actually knows the effects or if it works, it’s considered a bit over-the-top since it’s probably futile anyway. It is also not a Vow with a death component; Narcissa is obviously alive in this story even though Lucius is already dead. I wrote the generational curse protection theory in as a dig at Cursed Child for the way they handled Astoria’s character.

The idea of it I think is romantic, but I will stress it is very dependent upon the intent of the two participants. To quote Draco in chapter 48 again: “To twine one’s soul to another showed a willingness to not only physically tether one’s self during your time here on earth, but to commit to a blending of your magical cores, putting faith in your magic to recognize its bonded counterpart in another life. Should other lives even exist.”

If you re-read Draco’s experience during the bonding ceremony in chapter 51 (starting from this bit: “The cognizance of his own powers never felt sharper, more familiar, but suddenly another power pulsed within to join with his.”) you might find it bears a resemblance to the trajectory of their relationship.

Lastly- I’ve left Draco and Hermione to their wedded bliss. I’ve got nothing planned for them beyond where they are in the final lines of chapter 51. I don’t have that itch to write more into their future because it would feel forced. Draco laid out his two envisioned futures with Hermione in chapter 48 when they discuss having or not having children. They are happy and content in the life they chose together. That’s all I ever wanted for them.

You will see more from this story though. I have an entire series of one-shots and outtakes from the published Remain Nameless timeline that I’ll start posting soon.

Thank you so much list anon! These were fun to answer!

[g-46-stark]

Find Me In Paris: Things I’m still wondering...

So, I really love Find me in Paris, is really funny and original.

I appreciate the way they handle all the time travel stuff... I’ve watched it like a hundred of times, but I’m still wondering:

1-Why no one ever told Lena about the Russian Revolutions of 1905 and 1917?

Really, not even Ines, who’s like the ballerina version of Hermione Granger.

For the ones who don’t know what I’m talking about, or just wants a reminder, I’m going to make a short resume:

From 1904 to 1905 Russia and Japan were fighting a war; Russia lose it, so people weren’t very happy (they also realize some social classes needed some changes);

The Russian army repressed a manifestation in St. Petersburg (some people want to present a petition to zar Nikolai II);

It started a revolution that lasted two years (1905-1907). After it, the zar was forced to create the Duma (a sort of Parliament). Some historicals think that this was the first step of the 1917 Russian Revolution;

During WWI, the social situation in Russia wasn’t all this good, especially for the factory worker. They all unite under the ideals of Lenin, and it started the October Revolution, which led to the abdication of zar Nikolai II;

Due to some political issue (it started a civil war between the new communist government and people that still wanted the zar) Nikolai Romanov and his family (his wife Alexandra, his four daughter Olga, Tatiana, Maria and Anastasia, and his son Alexei) were took in Siberia and then killed.

So, Lena is a Russian princess: some people think is Nikolai daughter, but since it’s not specificated, let’s say she’s his niece. 

She obviously doesn’t know about Russian nobility fate; so, she still thinks that in Russia there would be a zar, who would be one of Nikolai’s descendants.

She says on more than one occasion that she is a princess, who lives in a palace in Russia.

But the thing is this: I don’t think the old Russian nobility still lives in Russia and has all their old proprieties such as palaces.

So no one (not even the teachers) find strange that Lena goes around saying she’s a princess?

This leads me to the next point: why doesn’t Ines tell Lena about Russia 20th century history?

She knows Lena is from 1905, so she knows why she doesn’t know about it.

If I know that one of my dearest friends is a time traveler from 1900’s Russia (and part of the nobility), one of the first thing I would say to them it would be: “If you ever go back in your century, stay away from Russia! Move to the US and don’t go anywhere else!”.

I understand Ines wouldn’t say that for all the “don’t change the past because you don’t know how it could affect the future” thing, but seriously… Lena always said she wanted to go back! You don’t want to even warn her?

And later, in season 2, Lena said to Max all the truth; and she also said she wanted to go back so she could save Ines.

All Max has to say on it was: “Oh, ok. I’m really sad that you’re leaving, but that’s ok. Let’s create the most transgressive choreography that Paris Opera has ever seen.”.

And I was like… Ehm…hello?? The girl you claim to love just said she wanted to go back at the beginning of a disastrous century!! She’s leading herself into two revolutions and probably her death, but ok, let’s dance through it.

No one there knows anything about 1900’s Russian history?

And besides that, what about the history lessons or the history teacher?

What do they teach students in that school?

Oh, right...

2- Max's family: What happened between Max and Ruben     (Reuben?)? What happened between Armando and his wife? And, more importantly, where is she?

I know that since Lena is the main character, we should be worried about her background story, but really… you can’t throw us some hints about Max's dysfunctional family and then just walk away.

I mean, maybe it’s just me, but I’m still confused about something.

If I get it right (feel free to correct me if I’m wrong):

Ruben is not Armando biological son: he was adopted in Spain;

He was a street boy, who was an extraordinarily talented dancer;

He and Max were inseparable;

At some point, their mum took them to London, where she wanted them to attend a boarding school (Arrow? Harrow?);

Max was accepted, but Ruben wasn’t;

So, Armando took the boy with him to New York (where he presumably worked for the Imperial Ballet) since their mum “can’t take care of him”;

Then something bad happened between the two brothers;

The result was that Max was expelled from his school and his relationship with Ruben was ruined;

Max said that Ruben came to visit him at school and started “acting like himself”: he made something bad, but we don’t know what;

After “breaking his mother’s heart” for being expelled (words from Armando), Max won a sort of scholarship for a European ballet school and chose to go to Paris;

Then, it happens all Lena’s stuff;

At a certain point Ruben comes back in Max life, “stealing” is brother baroque choreography and going at his school (and dancing with his chica);

In a dialogue, we discover that he and Max made a promise, but one of them broke it;

I think it was about not “entering in the other's territory”? Like, Ruben couldn’t go to Max boarding school and Max couldn’t go to a ballet school/found a hip-hop crew? 

I don’t know if I missed something or I just misunderstood things, if you can explain it to me, I’ll be happy to listen. 

Anyway, I have some main question about Max family: 

WHERE IS HIS MUM??

I mean, I assumed she lives in London, her son lives in Paris, it’s like an hour's flight… why she never shows up? 

Not even for his shows at Garnier? Not even when her son injured himself so bad that he ends up in the hospital and had surgery?

Is she dead? Is she ill? Like does she have cancer or something so bad that she couldn’t take a plane to go to visit her hurt son? In that case, I’m sorry for my cruel judgment.

But otherwise…I know that the others character parents never go to visit their children (the only exception were Dash and Thea’s mums), but I think that every parent would have shown up in case their child end up in a hospital.

Is she totally unaffectionate?

Because the quote from Armando: “I took Ruben to NY because he wasn’t admitted at Harrow and your mother couldn’t take care of him” sound pretty bad.

What happened between Max's parents?

I know that married couple living in different city/country due to work isn’t uncommon, so it wouldn’t have bothered me if some word in Max and Armando’s dialogue in season 1 hadn’t been said:

Armando said that his wife decided to take the boys back to London, and it sounded to me like he didn’t totally agree with that decision.

Max said something like “don’t speak about mum” as it hurts listening to his dad talking about his mum.

So, maybe I’m seeing drama everywhere, but it seems to me that something happened with Max's mum and/or between the parents.

My interpretation of that, after seeing that scene, is that Armando and his wife were divorcing, so Mum took her sons and moved to London (without Dad's consent, maybe, it’s sadly common in some difficult divorces). Both the boys were obviously traumatized by that, so Ruben started acting badly (so he wasn’t admitted at school) making his mum desperate and unwilling to take care of him? And maybe Max was angry with his father for leaving mum and them (and after, for taking Ruben to NY and leaving him in a boarding school)? 

Why are Ruben and Max hating each other?

Okay, they’re brothers, but we’re going a little too far, don’t we?

Maybe Max’s a little jealous of Ruben's talent and (again) because he was taken to New York with their father while he was in a British all-male boarding school and blah, blah, blah… okay, we get it.

But Ruben?

Maybe he is jealous because he’s not Armando's biological son? Because he thinks Armando would always choose his “real” son instead of him?

It could be, but I’m totally plotting things on this point

We know that probably Ruben was the reason for Max's expulsion from his old school, and I presume that their parents thought it was Max’s fault, but I don’t think that’s all the story.

I mean, I personally want to know more about this.

In conclusion, dear producers: you can’t just toss at us two brothers that literally want to punch one another without a real explanation and expecting us to just walk away with that.

So…tell me what you think. 

Sorry for the long post, and thanks for reading it! 

[desperate-entwives]

And what’s he then that says I play the villain?

Merry late Christmas and happy late New Year, @infernalandmortal <3

Emori did the dishes like she always did: carefully, balancing the plates in the flat of her larger hand as she gripped the sponge with the other, dexterous in a way that comes only from necessity. She was giving her dishes extra focus, and after that would come cleaning out the fridge, and then going through her clothes for stuff to sell on ebay, and then and only then might she think about the audition she’d promised Raven she would attend that evening. 

“Don’t you need more tech people?” she’d asked the night before, sure they were a rarity. “I could be a tech person. I’m good at being a tech person.” “Normally we’d beg for more tech people,” she’d replied, “but luckily for you, we actually don’t need them right now. And you need to get out of your comfort zone.” 

And it wasn’t like she was wrong. 

The chores (which Emori, incidentally, usually put off as long as God and Raven Reyes would allow) took about forty-five minutes, and she milled on the steps of her apartment building for a good ten minutes after, wondering why she’d agreed to this but knowing, entirely, that she had, and not just because Othello was one of her favorite plays. After the end of a cascade of problems (legal trouble, the end of graduate school, and helping her brother escape the abusive household they’d been raised in, you know, typical things) Emori had realized her ability to maintain casual relationships had almost disappeared, her roommate and best friend notwithstanding. The past three months had been a quiet spell; work at the lab and nothing much else. Raven, who volunteered as lighting technician and occasional stage manager with one of the hundreds of theatre groups in the burrough, was committed to helping her not fade into social obscurity. 

It was nice. It was also annoying. 

As she leaned against the complex’s glass door and wondered how else she could kill time and ignore her raging nerves, Emori suddenly noticed a guy standing at the foot of the steps, staring at her. 

“What are you looking at?” she snapped, trying to resist the urge to tuck her left hand into her coat pocket.

Brows raised, he lifted his palms like someone surrendering. “Just want to, you know, enter my apartment building.”

Her breath came out between her teeth as a hiss. “Right. Sorry.” She stepped aside, trying to ignore the embarrassment flooding through her. 

But at least it was a distraction from the nerves, which had dimmed momentarily only to rage again once remembered. She checked her phone. Two hours to go.

---

The time was eventually killed at Socrates Sculpture Park, and by the time the audition rolled around, Emori was calmer. Something about the way people took garbage and made it beautiful (though, essentially, useless) fascinated her. So when she stepped into the church basement that was being rented out for auditions, she felt confident. Excited, almost.

“Good, there you are,” Raven said, abandoning a desk where she’d been perched with a half-filled piece of paper on a clipboard. “Thought you were gonna back out.” “I’m a woman of my word.”  “Are you?” Raven clicked her tongue and added Emori’s name to the list before handing her a small audition form. “Here, fill this out. We’re just doing cold readings today.” 

Raven’s small desk was tucked into the side of the room: the rest of the space was taken up with lines of graying folding chairs, which had been cleared from one side of the room. Presumably that would be their stage area. As she made to go sit in the far corner, Raven rolled her eyes and gestured for her to come closer.  “Why are you making this so hard for me?” Raven tugged on her sleeve and walked over to a dark-haired man reading from a tattered script. “Hey Bellamy, this is Emori. I’ve told you about her.”  “I don’t know what you could have said,” Emori said honestly.  “That you have stage presence and absolutely no experience.”  “Thanks.” “It’s nice to meet you,” Bellamy said, grinning at Raven before turning to Emori. There was something about his demeanor that put her immediately at ease, and she figured there could be more intimidating directors. “I’m looking forward to seeing you read.” 

“Don’t get your hopes up,” she said, and Raven elbowed her in the ribs. 

---

While Raven signed the other actors in, Bellamy introduced Emori to a few other regulars with the company before settling in the front with the assistant director, a tall brunette named Echo who struck Emori as the opposite of calming. The audition process was entirely informal– relaxed, even, for such serious subject matter. Emori read for Desdamona and Emelia and even the titular character (“this is gender-blind casting,” Raven called when she was summoned up, “and the only limitation is that Othello can’t be white.”). She was halfway through a soliloquy when the guy who was staring at her outside her apartment building walked in.   She felt like she was going to choke on the middle English and her words fell away because, yeah, that was him. The same sharp blue eyes and prominent nose.  “Keep going,” Bellamy said to Emori before casting a glance in the newcomer’s direction. “It’s not your fault that some actors are rude assholes who can’t make it to an audition on time.”  “I had a situation,” the guy said, so casually that Emori realized they were probably friends, and, as though to solidify this deduction, stepped forward to ruffle Bellamy’s hair before sitting down.  After finishing, the assistant director stopped Emori from leaving the stage before turning, looking at the newcomer with either exasperation or fondness, maybe both, and saying, “Murphy, read for Iago.”  “I’ve barely had a chance to read the sides,” Murphy complained.  “Too bad,” Bellamy said, and cast a glance at Echo. She nodded, and he continued. “Emori, do you have the excerpt from Act Three up there with you?”  Emori shuffled through the papers and found the scene in question, which was a dialogue between Iago and Emelia. When Murphy ambled onstage, she was suddenly aware of his physicality, which shifted a little bit once he stood across from her. It was the character, she realized; the sharpness of Iago intensified the sharpness in him. It made something in her liquify; it was a challenge, almost, and she tilted her chin up as he said, without being bid to start, “How now! What do you here alone?”  “Do not you chide,” she said, familiar with the lines by now, “I have a thing for you.”  He smirked at that, stepping around her in something almost feline. “A thing? It is a common thing—”  “Ha,” she muttered, turning to keep her eye on him.  “—to have a foolish wife.”  “Oh, is that all?” she said, curling her left fist as though hiding a scrap of fabric. She turned away from him before dropping the information: “What will you give me now for the same handkerchief?”  He stepped around her, glaring down as their eyes locked. It’s funny, Emori thought, exactly how intense eye contact could be, even when you were speaking to someone emotionally clothed as someone else. “Wh– what handkerchief?” he said, turning the stutter into a character choice relaying eagerness. The stutter wasn’t in the play, so Emori tucked that information away somewhere in the back of her mind.  “What handkerchief?” she said smoothly, and smiled up at him like she had once at a policeman she’d bribed out of a shoplifting arrest. All darkness in the eyes, a bit of trust, a hook and string. “Why, that the Moor first gave to Desdemona, that which so often you did bid me steal.” “Hast stolen it from her?” he said, and a grin crept onto his face. That liquid unraveling again; she tried to resist it, to keep the mask up.  “Okay, guys,” Bellamy said before she could articulate her next line, “I think we’ve seen enough.” 

---

Emori left without Raven, who had to discuss casting with Echo and Bellamy for a while. After smiling at some of the other people she’d met (among them a quiet blonde girl named Harper with a strong stage presence, the kind that makes you stop breathing and listen, and her boyfriend, a dark-haired boy who worked with props), she started down the street towards the closest subway entrance.  “Hey, wait up,” a voice called, and she turned to see Murphy jogging to catch up with her.  “Hi,” she said, realizing that, though she felt she knew him after that reading, they’d never actually had a real conversation.  “You’re Emori, right?”  “Yeah.” “John Murphy,” he said, ducking his head a little. “We’re neighbors, actually.”  “I remember. Sorry for snapping at you earlier, John.”   He barked out a laugh, slightly self-deprecating. “I’m used to it.”  She grinned, but said, “Well, you shouldn’t be used to that.” Something flashed in his eyes and she decided to drop it for now, because there was something serious under there to excavate, and she had to be careful about doing that these days.  “You’re good,” he said, almost awkwardly, and she realized it was a compliment about her acting. A beat, and then: “I hear you live with Reyes.”  “I do. We met in college.”  “I’ve known her forever. It’s why she hates me.”  He said it flippantly, so she laughed. “I take it there’s a whole story there.”  “You have no idea. Well, you live with her, so maybe you do.”  She and Raven were close, but she didn’t know all that much about Raven’s life before college. “I tend to think a past version of you wouldn’t be real anyway,” she said, choosing the words carefully.  “You might be alone in that,” he said, and she realized they were walking in synch, the exact same speed and pace, in spite of his longer legs.  “I’m alone in a lot of things.”  “Mysterious.”  She stopped walking and looked up at him. “Why were you staring at me outside my apartment?” she said, because she’d been wondering all night.  He ran a hand through his hair, avoiding her eyes. “You were blocking the door,” he mumbled.  She raised an eyebrow.  “It’s okay,” he continued. “I liked that you were blocking the door. I guess that’s why. Also, your hand.”  “What about it?” she said, defenses ready to manifest, covering all the doors.  “It’s cool.”  That took her aback. “Cool?”  “Yeah, you know. Kinda badass. Your whole vibe says you could beat me up.” He grinned, and that awkward vulnerability slipped behind that sharp charm again. She was beginning to learn his patterns already and that one word, already, curled into her brain and started to live there. The implication of time lingering there in her thoughts. “I’m into that.”  She laughed, and leaned against the railing of a closed shop. “Liar.”  “I could prove it to you,” he offered. “Sometime. If you want.”  She studied him, the way headlights caught in the sharp panes of his face. There were people everywhere, as there always were in Queens, but he was the only one she could take any notice of. She had the distinct feeling that he was slippery, and she’d caught him.  “How about we take a walk, instead,” she said. “Anywhere in particular?” “Socrates,” she said, before she could change her mind. It was sudden, but she realized there was something in him she did want to excavate. The only way to keep herself accountable was to take him to her vulnerable place; the sculpture park, with all of its artfully scattered trash.  “The park? I love that place,” he said, and before the words could register, her phone buzzed. So did John’s. Hers was a message from Raven:  The cast list will be sent out tomorrow but you know who you got.  And then, like an afterthought, another buzz.  You know what the guy walking you home got, too. 

She guessed John’s message was similar, because they both grinned as they looked up. 

“Ready for marriage?” she asked.  “It’s a little fast,” he said as they began walking again, “but I’m game.”

[beautifulpaxielreads]

Once and Future (Once and Future, #1) by Amy Rose Capetta and Cori McCarthy

No. of pages: 349

Triggers: Oh boy, here we go. Genocide, tyranny, oppression, physical and mental abuse of both people and animals, mentions of dead bodies, the villain is basically a dictator.

Safe for work: Nope! There’s nudity, sex scenes, and discussions of an... ahem...sexual nature.

Blurb:

Coming to terms with your identity is always difficult. But for Ari, the 42nd reincarnation of King Arthur, it just got a whole lot more complicated. Gender-bending royalty, caustic wit and a galaxy-wide fight for peace and equality all collide in this epic adventure.

With an awkward adolescent Merlin and a rusty spaceship, this is the Arthurian legend as you have never before seen it. (taken from publisher’s website, link is https://oneworld-publications.com/once-future-pb.html)

NB. Be warned - slightly spoilerish content ahead!

My review:

The more I read of this book, the more I thought this would make a great movie. Or even better – a TV series on Netflix or Hulu or Apple TV or any other streaming service. It’s got all the necessary ingredients for a hit:

• Science fiction in outer space? Check.

• Ragtag group of misfit teenagers fighting an evil mega-corporation bent on taking over the universe? Check.

• The main character is a reincarnation of a mythical king who may or may not have existed historically? Who happens to be mentored by an equally mythical wizard – with MAGIC? Check.

• Endlessly quotable, snappy dialogue? Check.

• Fast-paced plot with lots of action and romance? Check.

• Self-aware villain who glories in his own evilness? Check.

• References to contemporary pop culture? Check.

The reason I think it would work better as a streaming series as opposed to a movie is this – Once and Future is a glorious rainbow of gender and sexual diversity which I personally don’t think Hollywood is ready for just yet.

Characters are variously gay, straight, genderfluid, asexual, and bisexual. In this universe, the concept of heterosexuality doesn’t exist – most characters have never heard of such a thing.

Whilst reading this, I kind of wish I’d read the origin stories for King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table. The most I know of it is through the tv series Merlin.

Speaking of Merlin, can I say how much I love this version of him? Basically, he’s been stuck in this cycle of mentoring reincarnations of King Arthur, who happen to have a nasty habit of dying on him. He’s haunted by Arthur’s sister Morgana – quite literally – who is passionately in hate with him. Inconveniently, he’s also aging backwards, and when we meet him in this story, he is a teenager with *gasp* hormones!

So, *ahem*, where was I? Ah yes, the plot.

The main character is Ari, an illegal immigrant from a planet called Ketch, the inhabitants of whom are descendants of Arabic peoples who left Earth when it started to show signs of irreparable environmental damage. Unfortunately for them, the planet has been sealed off so no one can enter or leave. The only person who escaped this fate was Ari – and now Mercer (the evil mega-corporation who sealed off Ketch because of their dissenting views) is after her.

Fortunately, Ari – who happens to be the 42nd reincarnation of King Arthur – is surrounded by a gang of loveable rogues, one of whom she has a mad crush on – the queen of Lionel (another planet), Gweneviere. The others are her adopted brother Kay, Kay’s genderfluid friend Lamarack (who uses they/them pronouns), Lamarack’s brother Val, Merlin (who has a crush on Val), and finally the Black Knight and Gweneviere’s champion, Jordan (who is only in love with her job, hint hint).

Confused yet?

Once and Future has a hell of a lot packed into it. Not only does it show complex, non-heterosexual relationships, but it also includes themes of freedom, equality, and, with Mercer, the dangers of capitalism when it is allowed to operate unchecked. I see parallels with The Hunger Games, although others may disagree.

It’s also a grand space opera with elements of both science fiction and fantasy.

Can you tell I enjoyed it? It was a bit of slow start for me, but once I got into it, I really got into it. It’s incredibly fast-paced, brilliantly plotted and the dialogue is incredibly snarky and funny. I found myself reading parts aloud, it was that good.

Where it fell apart for me personally was the characters. Even though I liked them and admired them, I couldn’t connect with them emotionally (with the exceptions of Merlin, Ari and possibly Morgana). I’m not sure why, perhaps it was due to the fast-paced nature of the plot, and maybe it was just me. Have any of you ever read books where you felt like you were watching the characters from behind a glass wall, where you could see and hear them, but you couldn’t touch them? That’s what it felt like to me. No matter how good a plot is, if you can’t connect to the characters then you feel somewhat unfulfilled.

Do any of you get what I mean?

Anyway, this is just my opinion, so if you read this book and love these characters and connect with them emotionally, that’s great! I certainly think no two people ever read a book in the same way.

So, in conclusion, if your jam is a space opera jam-packed with gender and sexual diversity, then this is the book for you.

My rating: ⭐⭐⭐½ stars out of five.

[helly-watermelonsmellinfellon]

Ohkay. 2, 4, 5, 9, 11 for Can Your Friends do This?

2: What scene did you first put down?

Death and Hari sitting in the cell in Ch. 1 and Them offering to kill everyone who ever opposed her.

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

This Sasunaru moment from Ch. 11.

"You're an idiot."

"Sasuke!" Ino hissed, glaring at him for probably the first time in her life.

The Uchiha ignored her and instead, looked Naruto dead in the eye. "You feel guilt over ridding the world of those pieces of trash? They were trying to kill us. For a grudge they held against a man long dead. You used a power you mostly have never used before, in order to save our lives, and are beating yourself up over not having enough control necessary to stop a creature that can't even be killed. As if a little Genin such as yourself has power over the most powerful Biju in existence."

Naruto and Ino were both gaping and though Kakashi would never admit it to anyone, he was as well.

"If you weren't strong enough to control it this time, get stronger so you can control it next time. Your father entrusted you with this burden for a reason. Remember, that everything you learn as a ninja, is just like a double edged sword. It can be used to do harm and can be used to stop harm. How you use it defines who you really are. It is not what you are that matters, Naruto, it is who you are."

This training from Kakashi from Ch. 16.

Naruto wanted no time in scaling the wall and entering through the bathroom window. The memories of his one Bunshin let him know where to go. He crawled along the wall instead of using the stairs. He didn't know what sort of condition they were in and didn't want to deal with the possible creaking.

The lounge was decorated nicely in shades of blue and brown. So even though the outside was a mess, the inside was decent enough. Naruto recognized the civilian immediately when he glanced around the corner. She was an avid, anti-demon supporter. In other words, she really hated Naruto and made her dislike of him very well known over the years. A few stones may have thrown a few times as well.

He was overcome with the urge to do some damage to her property. To pay her back for being such a horrible person over the years. However, there was just a small voice inside that was telling him it was wrong. He was there for a mission. He was supposed to be training, and his emotions should not be interfering on said training mission.

But even more important than that, were the words of his nee-chan. Hari insisted that a prank was never meant to hurt anyone. Pranks were supposed to be funny and done in good humor(unless they were revenge pranks like he did to an old Academy sensei). She had told him stories of her twin friends who played pranks but didn't do so with the intent to hurt people, unlike her father and his friends who became bullies in school because their pranks went far enough to hurt others or worse.

Naruto didn't want to be a bully. And he didn't want to be a bad person. Just because the civilian was horrible to him, didn't mean he should lower himself to her level. If she was too stupid to see him for who he truly was, that wasn't his fault. She'd simply learn her lesson when he finally became the Hokage. One day she would see.

Until then, it was not Naruto's job to play judge or jury. Being mature sucked.

Huffing to himself, Naruto slipped through the room, sneaking up behind her chair and taking the remote off the table beside where she sat. She never even noticed either. He stuck his tongue out for good measure, and then fled because his time was almost up.

"Here you go, sensei!" he said when he returned to his team, well within the time limit, offering the remote to the man.

Kakashi hummed and accepted the offered item. "Well done. You showed some admirable self-control as well, Naruto. I'm proud of you."

He flushed. Apparently his sensei had known the type of person that had lived in the house. It wasn't necessarily a mission for him to prank, but for Kakashi to see his temperament. He wanted to know if Naruto could put the objective of the mission before his own wants and desires. He wanted to know if Naruto was capable of understanding when revenge was necessary and when it wasn't.

And he probably just passed a very important test in the man's eyes, which made him beam with pride. And to think, if he hadn't had Hari-nee-chan in his life, he probably wouldn't have made the decision to be the better person in the first place.

Sometimes, Kakashi could be pretty cool.

"Naruto, wait ten minutes and then go put the remote back exactly where you found it. It'll be enough time for her to notice and get agitated. Your time limit is thirty seconds this time. If you get caught, not only do you fail and end up with horizontal training all day, but you will have to dig yourself out of the hole you fell in."

He sighed. Kakashi was still evil though.

This Hari/Kakashi scene also from Ch. 16.

The silver-haired man hummed. "Since you're training is finished for the day, would you care to help with my training?"

She sent him a bland look. "I am not sparring with you any time soon. While the last time was humorous enough as it is, I don't feel like getting wet at present. It's a bother."

"How sad!" Kakashi sighed dramatically. "Koneko-chan doesn't like it when I get her wet and bothered."

The woman flushed at the suggestive words, but did not answer his taunting. She would not let him see the results of his words. She was better than that.

"No you aren't," said Death. "You give into his teasing all the time. You like it."

Shut up!

Anyway, back onto the subject at hand. "What kind of training and what's in it for me if I do help you, Koinu-kun?"she asked in a sickly sweet tone, batting her lashes repeatedly in hopes of annoying him or at the very least creeping him out a bit. Because that wasn't her normal attitude and obviously it would be weird, right?

It didn't work. He merely seemed amused. Perhaps all the other odd Jonin he knew raised his tolerance for wonky shite. "Mah, I figure that if you could help me with this, then we can both read this lovely book I own, that you have yet to get a copy of." He held up said book. The one from the time in the kitchen. When she had him set the table while she messed around with the book and Jiraiya gaped like a fish as they argued over his porn.

"And how would we both read it if we're working?" inquired the woman doubtfully.

"Simple. I place it on the ground, and as I do my push ups, you sit on my back and read over my shoulder. You can then use your Kekkei Genkai to turn the pages. Both of us will be getting something out of it then."

She had sat on Anko's back a few times when the woman trained, but never anyone else. And this was Kakashi of all people. He wanted her to sit on him and read erotica with him, while he exercised. He she had been anyone else, she might have thought he was trying to be a pervert, but she knew better.

While it could have suggestive themes, it was a practical request and both would indeed benefit from it. He for exercise and she for new reading material. And he didn't ask her to read it aloud, which kind of negated any assumptions of him doing this out of a desire for sexual anything.

"Okay," she found herself agreeing, wanting to read the damn book. "How many push ups will you be doing?"

"One thousand."

Merlin.

"Speed run, or taking your time?"

"Taking my time."

He was suddenly even more impressive. And Hari was going to be sitting on his back for the next however long, reading erotica. She ignored the small tingle in her belly, and shrugged. Not sexual despite the content that would be involved.

"Let's do this."

Kakashi got into position and Hari gazed at his arse only for a few seconds. It wasn't wet this time so the fabric didn't cling as much, but it was still a nice view. Probably a result of the hard training he put himself through for years. Pert and firm. Nice.

"Go ahead," he urged her, and Hari was careful, throwing a leg over him and ending up straddling him. She shifted a few times, before shrugging and laying down instead. Sitting would be uncomfortable since he was ripped and she was pretty thin herself. So her butt would end up hurting. But laying on him was far more easy, and brought her face closer to the book. And if her head rested beside his own, neither acknowledged it.

And yes, she realised that this was not the position he'd spoken of, but it was just better for both of them. Besides, he was longer and wider than she was in frame, so she was easily able to lay on his back and not cause him any discomfort. Her hands couldn't even touched the ground from how her arms dangled over his sides. So it just made sense. Also, her weight was more evenly spread out this way.

"Chapter one," she announced unnecessarily, flicking a hand and watching as the page turned. "Just tell me when you're ready for a page flip."

And so went the next hour of Hari trying to divide her attention away from the rippling muscles of Kakashi's back, to the book that the both of them had managed to get twelve chapters into. It was difficult, and she only slightly regretted the position, especially when she was left feeling warm and fuzzy in the lower portion of the body.

How dare he be attractive and strong. And shame on her body for being so damn weak in finding obvious displays of strength, sexy!

5: What part was hardest to write?

All the battles during the Rebellion Arc.

9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

I briefly considered pairing Naruto and Gaara but my sasunarusasu heart said nope!

11: What do you like best about this fic?

Changing things little by little and yet those small changes making BIG changes later on thanks to the butterfly effect.

[ladyloveandjustice]

Just got back from the Sailor Moon Super Live!

It was SO much fun. There were tons of people there cosplaying and everyone was so excited. I have pix which I will share later!

I just went all out and bought all the three things they had available with the merch too, which were a poster, t shirt and a light stick that lit up with all five of the inners colors (plus a lighter pink and white no idea who that represents) and it had their silhouettes too. It was kind of funny because you could basically see who everyone’s fave was from what lights they chose- my friend Bethany adores Minako so hers was always orange. I kind switched between them, though I favored red and green. 

I actually ran into an old friend from college who really adores Sailor Moon so that was cool!

The show itself was interesting and really unlike any other Sera Myu I’ve seen. First of all, it was special effects BONANZA, especially at the beginning with Beryl, all this fire and stuff and the planets going by. They actually had little english speech bubbles pop up for attacks and stuff, manga style, and showed a bunch of manga images at the beginning to introduce the characters too.

The whole play had very little dialogue overall, with large sections of it being completely silent except for the instrumental music. Because of that, it was the classic arc basically in its most basic, pure form. The general plotline was basically a combo of the anime and manga with some new stuff added in. It started out with Beryl going through the Shittenou and basically overloading them with her power and turning them back into their rock forms, with Kunzite being the only one smart enough to bow to her and thus being chosen as miniboss. SO HE GOT TO REP THE ENTIRE SQUAD FOR THE PLAY, WE REALLY ARE ECONOMICAL HERE. 

Then it was Usagi and Mamoru bumping into each other and being sassy, then them as Sailor Moon and Tuxedo Mask and her being saved by him- then there was a sequence where Usagi goes to class and is late and then a villain attacks and everyone turns into zombies- Tuxedo Mask comes and Usagi goes into this extended fantasy sequence about him that was really cute and anime-esque, she literally gets out HEART EYES, merry go round horses come in and he’s riding one, then they actually drag out a giant gift box and Tuxedo Mask pops out.

Then the inners finally came, and they all sang a song about how they’re best friends and they love Usagi and will always protect her even though she’s “a little flaky”. This was the first time subtitles were even neccessary (though they were used earlier for “I’m late!” and “Tuxedo Mask...”), and they appeared in little screens on the side of the stage.

there was this sequence where they went to Harajuku and sung about how it was the best, and changed into costumes and kimonos and stuff-the best part was when Usagi clearly wanted to sing something but Minako SNATCHED that away from her and did a solo hamming it up.

Usagi heads to the arcade and sucks at a video game. Mamoru comes and snarks at her a bit and then plays a video game himself and they both get really excited and high five about it when he gets a high score and then are immediately awkward. Then the bad guys give Usagi an EVIL SAILOR V console, and...when she plays it Mamoru kind of gets dragged into the video game? And she’s beating the crap out of him without realizing it, they put like, screens in front of him that had a little animation of a pixelized version of Mams being attacked, it was all very impressively elaborate and little confusing. Then when she entered the last level Usagi entered the video game too and they started getting attacked by minions. Mamoru tried to protect Usagi but was overpowered, and then the Inners showed up to Save The Day and sing their little introduction songs. Highlights of those

-Rei specifically says she’ll punish bad guys in her CHIC high heels. Chic, guys

-Her declaration of “I’ll protect Usagi” is by far the gayest, she says “I’ll fight for you, sweet girl” or something like that.

-Jupiter says “Though I’m tall and powerful, I’m a timid flower inside” and then immediately decks a guy. OKAY SURE.

Anyway, there’s a big fight scene with the inners and Tuxedo Mask vs the minions and Kunzite, during the course of which Mamoru gets his mask knocked off and Usagi’s like “gasp” then, of course, he gets kidnapped and brainwashed. Usagi is very upset, the inners all comfort her (Ami goes first) and sing a song about how it’s a “maiden’s policy” to never give up. Then they all like, instantly get up and do the Sailor teleport.

The girls end up at Beryl’s place and fight with the minions a bit, and appear defeated (it’s really hard to explain this part, like they get forced into these diamond boxes and when they’re covered up it like these still black and white images of them frozen and screaming? it was cool though). But Usagi comes in with color and they all wave these colorful flag and break out! Then they fight Kunzite for a bit, who, I forgot to mention, has a light saber (there’s a cool moment in an earlier fight where he tries to stab Usagi and Minako blocks it with her chain). He’s pretty powered up, so Minako summons the holy sword to fight him, but when they charge at each other they both stop and he remembers something and she remembers something like “waaaa were we a thing?’ (the way the audience went “ooooh” during this part was hilar). But seeing he’s remembered, Beryl immediately kills Kunzite, SO MUCH FOR THAT. 

Beryl then unleashes brainwashed Mamoru, who starts beating up the inners, Usagi grabs the holy sword, prepares to stab him...then throws the sword aside. I almost laughed at this, it was seriously the show going “NO DON’T LIKE THIS PART OF THE MANGA GONNA GO 90s ANIME STYLE FOR THIS PART” really blatantly. She charges at Mamoru and hugs him to restrain him instead, he throws her off, but USAGI IS DETERMINED ABOUT THIS HUG OKAY, and it works!...then Beryl immediately kills him! AND THE INNERS. 

Usagi collapses, but then she hears all the inners calling her name (everyone cheered at Rei’s annoyed “uSAgi”, all i could think was “jet woulda loved that”) and so she fights Beryl, who keeps throwing her down, but she keeps getting back up, then Usagi is SWALLOWED BY HER DARKNESS (aka a big black cloth) but comes out with her staff, all the inners appear as ghosts to lend her their power and Beryl is defeated the end of the anime season 1 basically. Then Usagi collapses, only for Mamoru to appear all suddenly okay to kiss her awake, manga style. 

Then the inners appear and look around like “wow we’re okay somehow huh” and hug each other (hilariously the hugs are Rei/Minako and Ami/Makoto, PANDERING TO THE MOST POPULAR SHIPS), then Usagi sees them and they all hug. FIN. Literally, Fin appeared on the screen.

Yep, like I said, the first arc boiled down to its most basic basics. It’s a pretty clever way to handle the fact we all have seen the first arc of sailor moon a billion times I guess! WE ALL KNOW THE STORY SO WE DON’T REALLY NEED DIALOGUE DO WE, SO HERE IT IS IN BROAD STROKES WITH A FEW SONGS THROWN IN. Like, just the EMOTIONS of Sailor Moon, here for the audience to partake in. I wonder if that’s why they chose this to be the one to show in America, because there wasn’t a need for too many subtitles? Was this specifically designed for international showings?

 It was a pretty short show, like only an hour too, and then they all sang songs for about twenty minutes afterwards and we waved our lights and it was great. I thought I’d cry when La Soldier came on. At the end Usagi said “Thank you, we love you all” in English it was so sweet.

The only downside of the experience for me was a guy behind me kept muttering  snarky comments to, i guess, his gf, not even whispering. Like, why was he even here? Stuff like “wow he turned into a lightbulb” about Kunzite’s death, and saying “what about consent” during the end scene where Usagi’s kissed awake in a way where it was clear he doesn’t ACTUALLY care about this issue and is just trying to bother his gf. I was mostly able to tune him out though, not gonna let him ruin my good time.

Anyway, so happy! I’ll talk more and post pics later. GOTTA SLEEP NOW.

[ruminativerabbi]

More Light!

I first read The Lives of the Caesars by Suetonius, the famously gossipy and endlessly amusing historian of the first twelve Roman emperors, when I was in graduate school. Lots of the book stays with me still, but among those anecdotes he relates that I could cite in a letter that might possibly fall into the hands of children my favorite has to do, I think, with the death of Vespasian—the archenemy of the Jews of his day and the Roman most responsible for the brutal defeat of the rebellion that left Jerusalem in ruins and the Temple razed. He was dying of terminal diarrhea (which detail appeals to me for some reason) and sensed that his end was near, when, so Suetonius, he looked at the people assembled by his bedside and archly said, “Vae, puto deus fio,” which translates loosely as “Vay iz mir, I think I’m turning into a god.”  Okay, the vay iz mir part I just made up. (Although vae in Latin means roughly the same thing as that longer Yiddish expression that oddly starts with the same word.) But the rest is slightly funny, slightly pathetic: since the Romans in his day liked to imagine their deceased Caesars turning into minor gods, Vespasian apparently though he could announce his imminent demise in an amusing way by forecasting his posthumous deification. Hardy-har-har!

That story came back to me over the last week as I received email after email about my last letter, the one in which I quoted Leonard Cohen’s song about light coming into the world because everything, somewhere, has a crack in it through which light can seep. I used that image to frame some of the good things I perceived as having happened lately, incidents or events that reminded me—in a particularly dark, distressing couple of months—that where there is darkness there can also be light…if you know where to look for it!

One writer asked me, I think seriously, if I was turning—not into a Roman god—but, in some ways even less probably, into an optimist. My regular readers know that optimism is hardly a hallmark of my worldview. Just to the contrary, I think, is the case: I have read too much—way too much—history, and particularly Jewish history, to see things other than clearly. And, at least for me, that means understanding mindless anti-Israelism not as a momentary aberration but as an integral plank of Western culture, as merely the latest iteration of the anti-Judaic sentiment that underlies too much of Western culture to be removed or even removable other than by the cultural version of a tectonic plate shift. So, no, I don’t think I’m ready to look out at the world and declare myself even a non-cockeyed optimist. And yet there have been just lately some positive, encouraging events that I omitted to discuss last week. And so, at risk of being accused of abandoning my systemic pessimism about the universe, I thought I’d risk writing about them this week. Why not? I’m on a roll!

I am thinking of two recent events principally.

The first is the conference that took place just last month in London that brought together Arab intellectuals and leaders from fifteen different Arab countries: Morocco, Sudan, Libya, Egypt, Lebanon, Iraq, and nine Persian Gulf states, all of whom were apparently of the mind that the best way to bring peace to the Middle East would be for Arab states, as well as the Palestinians, to engage with Israel, to abandon the decades-long boycott of the Jewish State, and to welcome Israel as a partner-in-dialogue. Even casual students of the Middle East will understand easily how surprising—or rather, shocking—a development this was. And yet, there they were: journalists, artists, scholars, politicians, and scholars (including scholars of the Quran) sitting together and saying clearly that the refusal to acknowledge the reality of Israel’s existence has mostly cost the Palestinians what could otherwise have been the opportunity to build their own state with the willing, even eager, support of their Israeli neighbors.

The group has a name: The Arab Council for Regional Integration. And they have a leader too in one Mustafa el-Dessouki, an Egyptian who edits an influential Arabic-language news magazine called Majalla. More recognizable will be the name of Anwar el-Sadat, not the assassinated Egyptian leader (obviously) but a namesake and nephew whose major claim to fame—at least so far—lies in his having been expelled from the Egyptian Parliament in 2017 for not being sufficiently obsequious to Egyptian President (and strongman) Abdel el-Sisi.

I’ve read several accounts of this meeting. (To sample some, click here, here, here, and here. To hear former P.M. Tony Blair’s address to the group, click here.) All seem in agreement that these people are sincere and that they represent a real sentiment among many in the Arab world—albeit one rarely expressed in public—to the effect that the real way to pave a path into the future for the Palestinians is for Israel to be made to feel secure, thus less inclined to act solely defensively, and to foster an atmosphere of mutual undertaking and endeavor that will make Israelis into real people for their Palestinian neighbors and, in some ways even more dauntingly, vice versa. This is something I’ve hoped would happen, basically, forever—the sudden appearance of a block of respected thinkers prepared to enter into sustained, respectful dialogue with Israeli leaders that is not “about” Israel’s right to exist but rather about the ideal way for Israel and its neighbors to relate to each other, to work together on projects of mutual benefit, and to create the kind of peaceful setting in the Middle East that would benefit all concerned parties.

It’s just a beginning. It’s not even that much of a beginning. But it is something…and, as far as I can see, it actually is real. I feel buoyed, almost encouraged, slightly hopeful, marginally less pessimistic—all highly unlikely developments for someone who prides himself on the sobriety and realisticism of his worldview. And yet…here we are! Something new has happened. Where we go from here, none can say. But all can hope!

So that was the first event I wanted to bring to your attention. The second has to do with a visit just last week by some senior journalists from Iraq, Egypt, Kuwait, and Saudi Arabia who came to visit Israel for a five-day visit. Organized by the Israeli Foreign Ministry, the guests all came from countries without diplomatic ties to Israel. But they came anyway, and this too represents a kind of sea-change—or at least the intimation of the possibility of that kind of sea-change—in the intransigency and obstinacy that has characterized even relatively liberal Arab writers when it came down to accepting the reality of Israel and understanding that the path to peace in the Middle East is through dialogue rather than violence. Yes, it’s true that these journalists, apparently fearing repercussions at home if it became known that they had been in Israel, retained their anonymity during the trip. But that only makes their visit more, not less, remarkable: here were people with everything to lose. And yet they came, partially (I’m sure) out of curiosity, but apparently also to take a principled stance against the mindless rejectionism that has led exactly nowhere in more than seventy years.

Their visit was not totally unprecedented. Last summer, a group of bloggers and journalists from Iraq and the Gulf States who came to Israel also last month as guests of the Israeli Foreign Ministry. In some ways, it was a normal trip: visits to Yad Vashem, the Temple Mount, the Knesset, etc. But this too was something we hadn’t ever seen: young writers, particularly bloggers, from Saudi Arabia, Iraq, and some Gulf States traveling around Israel, seeing the people not as a faceless enemy but as actual individual men and women, attempting to understand the culture of the place and its sense of self. (To get the idea, click here for a picture of a young Saudi blogger named Mohammed Saud and Yair Netanyahu, Bibi’s son, sitting side by side and apparently getting along just fine.)

None of this is going to matter in the long run if the participants are doomed to be outliers who represent no one but themselves. But I have long hoped—even prayed—for something like this, for people on the other side to realize that the great hope for a future for the Palestinian people lies in dialogue and cooperation, not in violence fueled by self-generated despair.

Yes, it isn’t much. In some ways, it’s hardly anything at all. But you know how it works with cracks and light: even the narrowest crack has the capacity to let in enough light to change everything! As Chanukah, the Festival of Lights, approaches, that seems like a positive notion to keep in mind.

[ssnakey-b]

FF8 English-French translarison, part 23: Battle of the Gardens

Welcome back, everyone! We are nearing the end of the CD2 content and beginning one of my favourite parts of the game: the Battle of the Gardens.

And immediately we’ve got some interesting stuff as the dialogue between Nida and Squall:

In English, Nida asks “The sorceress is with them, huh? So this is going to be the final battle?”. However, French Nida is more assured, stating “The witch is with them. This is going to be the ultimate battle.”

Also, as you may have noticed, we once again have an example of the French version going back and forth between using the words “sorcière” (witch/sorceress),  prêtresse” (priestess) and most confusingly, “nécromancienne” (necromancer) for Edea/Ultimecia. I know the English verison sometimes uses “witch” instead of “sorceress” as well, but the French version really likes to change what it calls them, although it does usually settle on “prêtresse”.

Anyway, back to the dialogue, English Squall replies with “I hope so,” but again the reply is quite different as he says “(yes, for whom?)” and indeed, it’s between parenthesis, implying he’s muttering it to himself, and making it very clear that he fully expects at least one of them to die.

Next, in English, Squall wonders “What should I do first? I have to give orders to everybody. It’s my responsibility.” in the French version, he’s more straightforward, thinking “I have to distribute tasks and give everyone orders.” Gotta say, I do like the way the English version emphasize Squall’s sense of duty a little more.

Geesh, we’re still on the first screen and we have yet more stuff to cover when it comes to Squall’s orders:

First, in English, Squall is pretty solemn about Seifer being there, as he says “As you may all know, Seifer is with them. I plan to settle everything, once and for all, with this battle.” French Squall is being a lot less cute about it, saying “One of us, Seifer, is fighting on the enemy’s side. Count on me to eliminate this traitor.” DAMN, French Squall ain’t fucking around!

Next, we have a bit of a strange difference in... lore, I guess? In English, Squall orders “1st and 2nd class Sabers” to go in the parking lot. In French, however, he orders the “grenadiers” to do so, which is rather odd for two reasons. First, as far as I’m aware, SeeD doesn’t use grenades (which would seem redundant hen you have magic anyway), and explosives seem to be more Galbadia’s speciality. And second, “grenadiers” as a specific unit isn’t a thing in the French army any more, and is usually associated with Napoleonic times, so that’s a bit of strange reference. Of course, I guess it could be kind of a non-literal term and refer to fire magic specialists.

Next, while giving orders to protect the quad and main entrance, English Squall splits the students between even and odd ID numbers. In French, it’s a bit more complicated, as he tells the “first year students” to get the quad, and the “candidates” to get to the entrance. I’m guessing “first year students” refers to new SeeD graduates and “candidates” to the ones nearing the end who can apply for the final exam but haven’t graduated yet.

Or maybe it’s kind of the opposite, and “first-year student” means people who just entered the cursus to join SeeD (as opposed to younger students who are getting a general education) and “candidates” are again the ones eligible for the final exam. Not that I really have any evidence backing it up either way. :P

And similarly, instead of telling students with an ID ending with 8 (which id a bit confusing considering he already gave students with even-numbered ID orders) to take care of the junior classmen, in French, they do follow through on the previous orders by having Squall tell the second year students to do so.

After the girls and Irvine tell Squall Zell is sleeping, English Squall is quite disbelieving an asks them whet they’re talking about. And in French, he’s actually extra snarky by asking “Are you kidding me right now?”.

And after Quistis says it’s their little secret, instead of wondering “... What’s he doing? We don’t have any time!”, he wonders “Are they drunk or something?”. Seriously, French Squall is so done with anyone’s bullshit.

Here’s one of the more amusing ones. In English, this guy says his status is “Indirect magic operative, level 2″. In French however, he says he’s in charge of... the film club. Now it’s clearly not meant to be a joke, I just find the contrast between the two version funny in this case.

Also, in English, Squall makes him a 1st class MG, as in Major General, presumably, which seems quite a high rank for someone whose background Squall doesn’t know (especially since I’m not even sure that’s how SeeD ranks work but whatever). In French, it seems a bit more plausible as he tells the guy “From now on, you’re the section B lieutenant”.

One thing I do like about the guy being in charge of the film club in the French version is how it shows how suddenly these kids’ lives can change in an instant in this game’s universe. It’s clear that for the most part, education in Balamb Garden is fairly standards, so one minute you could be minding your own business, hanging out with friend, engaging in normal high-school activities when suddenly bam! War gets dumped on you and you gotta adapt or die. Pretty of scary when you think about it.

There’s also a slight difference with these three guys. In English, the boys are part of the “Fire Platoon”, which make me wonder if it means they use guns (which again seems odd for Balamb Garden, but maybe it’s a thing) and the girl is a medic.

In French, however, one of the boys is explicitly a gunner (so I guess it really IS a thing), the other boy is a “nurse-fireman” (because one of these jobs just isn’t stressful enough on its own apparently) and the girl is a regular nurse.

Either way, I always loved Squall thinking quickly under pressure and making sure everyone has a role. It’s funny, there are many high-ranking (para-)military characters in video games, but it’s the only time I recall one actually acting like a leader.

The talk with Zell goes pretty much the same in both versions, I just find it funny that in English, Squall goes out of his way to encourage Zell & co by saying “Zell, I’m counting on you. Good luck, everyone.” whereas in French, he is much more laconic, merely saying “Good luck.”

Probably the smallest difference I’ll mention, but still an interesting one. In English, after the Galbadian forces invade, Squall tells the quad team to watch out. In French, he tells all “BGU Soldiers” to get ready. Both make sense, though I do like Squall giving more specific orders in English a little more. It gives the sense that he’s observing everything from the bridge and uses that to his advantage for tactical decisions.

Here’s another funny one. After Squall tells Zell to do whatever it takes to rescue Linoa, English Zell replies “Leave it to me!”. In French however, he seems less confident as what he says literally translates to “(Poor me!)” and it’s basically him going “(Oh, boy)”. This is especially funny when coupled with his confident-looking chest pat. I love the moment that imply that Zell is often not nearly as assured as he looks, but he puts on a brave face as to not demoralize his teammates.

Back in the headmaster’s office, where Kadowaki is once again proving herself to be the best NPC in gaming history by taking charge instead of Cid, there’s another amusing difference. In both versions, she tells Squall that it’s his destiny to fight Seifer, but while she’s pretty straightforward about it in French, I love that in English, she goes “It’s kind of like your destiny to face him”. Yeah, sort of or whatever. Look, just go kick his ass.

Another Irvine speech, another surprisingly big difference.

English:

Listen... Do me a favor. YOU... go help Rinoa. It may be too late, but don’t give up until you’re CERTAIN that there’s nothing more you can do!

French:

No way you can just leave her like that! Nobody abandons such a pretty girl, as long as there’s really nothing left to do...

By the way, that awkward phrasing at the end (as it should have been “UNTIL there’s really nothing left to do”) is indeed present in the actual text, so don’t blame it on me! And generally speaking I do like the English take on it better, especially as he goes “YOU help Linoa”. It’s like he’s saying “look, you gave the orders, we know what to do, but if YOU don’t rescue her, no-one can”.

And it really goes to show that in spite of the image he wants to give of himself, Irvine is surprisingly thoughtful. He knows Squall won’t be able to forgive himself if he doesn’t try to rescue Linoa, even if someone else rescued her, he’d feel like shit for not going for her.

There’s also a bit of an odd quirk in the English version a bit later, as Quistis says “we’ll clear a path. Once Squall arrives, we’ll move in.” which is a bit weird considering she’s talking to Squall. Even if you want to say she’s speaking to the group as a whole, it’s still a bit strange, especially as she’s still looking right at him. In French, she does address him directly saying “We’ll clear the path. Don’t worry about us.”

And so we get to Squall’s speech and while it’s very moving, I want you all to picture Linoa dangling off the side of Balamb Garden the whole time. Anyway, the first half of it is actually very similar in both versions. But then things get quite different:

English:

SeeD was formed to fight the sorceress; at least, that’s what I heard. And Garden was created to train SeeDs. So this battle is Garden’s destiny and also our destiny. It’s a grueling battle, and I’m sure you guys are all exhausted. But I don’t want to have any regrets. I don’t want anyone to look back and regret this day. So just this once, I want you guys to give everything you’ve got! For yourselves and for me!

French:

The battle we fight has many things at stake: everyone’s life, of course, but also the future of BGU and our democracy! This is why I ask each of you for one more push, non just for yourselves, but for everyone else. I count on you! I ask you to do your maximum, for you and for others.

And finally, I don’t know about you, but this is the moment I’ve been looking for. After Squall goes all tsundere on Linoa and claims him saving her was purely professional because they have a contract and it was everybody else’s idea and ti was a coincidence anyway and it’s not like I keep saving you because I like you or anything, so don’t get the wrong idea, baka, we get some small differences at first.

For example, while throwing Zell under the bus, instead of “Zell gave it to me, see? I’ve been holding on to it”, she says “Zell gave it to me. That was nice of him, wasn’t it?”. Rest assure that Squall swears to kill him either way. Also, I really like the animation of Squall’s shoulders tensing up and him rolling his neck while he thinks that. I don’t remember seeingt hat specific animation anywhere else either, so I lvoe that they gave him one for that of all things.

Also also, in both versions, he specifies that it’s his favourite ring, implying he owns many more. Behold Pimp Squall, blowing his cadet allowance on bling. Oh and while in English, he adds “You’d better give it back,” he doesn’t say that in French, which is yet another small detail that makes him come across a bit nicer in the French version.

People also noted that on top of lions in the FF8 universe not resembling our Earth lions, Linoa sounds out the the word like she’s never heard of it before, implying they’re fairly obscure mythical creatures. Well, that doesn’t happen in French and thinking about it, that’s a bit of a shame as that is an interesting subtle bit of lore.

But the question is: does this L I O N of his have a name? Sure does:

Yep, Griever is known as Cronos in French, tying it back to the time theme. Oddly, it’s lacking an H to really fit, so it might be a reference to the king of Titans as well.

So in both versions, Linoa says that it’s such an accident that people might think they’re together once she gets a copy of Squall’s ring. But what’ interesting is the specific terms used:

In English, she says “That’d be crazy, huh!? I mean, everyone might, y’know, get the wrong idea about us.”

In French, she says “The problem is that everyone will think we’re together!”

What makes this seemingly small difference have such significance is how it leads to Squall’s reply a bit later as in English, he tells Rinoa “You sound like you want everyone to get the wrong idea.” teasing her a bit while kind of calling her out.

In French however, it take son a whole other meaning as he says “I don’t know if it’s really a problem...”

And this to me really sounds like Squall openly admitting that he does have romantic feelings for Linoa. After all, why else would a guy like him be okay with people spreading rumours about him being with a girl? If nothing else, he’s certainly admitting that he’s comfortable being paired up with her by people and that he’s got some things to work out once the battle is over.

Oh and Linoa’s reaction in each version also speaks volume about what Squall just said. In English, she just vehemently denies being up to anything, going “No-no-no-no-no!”. In French, she seems much more flustered, going “Huh? What... What do you mean?”

We’ve got one last difference to end on. And once again, it’s quite a meaningful one. It happens as Squall ends yet another rousing speech. In English, it goes like this:

Squall: “We’ve come this far. I guess there no need for me to say anything.”

Rinoa: “We’re still listening. Squall, we want to know how you feel.”

Squall: “I’ll tell you later... After we all get out of this. Let’s go.”

In French, it goes like this (note that Squall uses the pronoun “tu”, showing he’s addressing Linoa specifically):

Squall: My little memories don’t interest you, huh?

Linoa: Of course they do! Tell me what you really think.

Squall: I’ll tell you that, if we’re still alive after this trial. Let’s go!

I find it very interesting that Squall make sit more personal here, by talking to Linoa directly. It’s a good way for him to tall the rest of the orphanage gang that they can’t put the rest of humanity in jeopardy because of their childhood memories.

But really, I like this part in both versions. And in both, you once again have Squall basically admit that he wants to get closer to Linoa. So even if you don’t take it as a love confession, then it certainly shows that he wants to figure out how exactly he feels about her, that he definitely wants their relationship to be more than professional, and that he intends to work out how far he wants it to go. And on top of that, it’s also a good motivator for her to give it all she’s got. “Don’t you die on me, I’ve got stuff to tall you about.”

Hhhaaa, I really enjoyed that one! And I hope you did too. Next time, it’s the second and final battle against Edea, the end of the CD2 content and the beginning of a new battle. In the meantime, feel free to ask questions, either by replying to this post or through my “ask” thing, or to just make comments or add your two cents. I always love to see people’s reactions and their own interpretations of various elements. And it would be really nice if you could give this post a reblog to help spread awareness. I know some people think their own blog is too small for it to matter but I assure you, every reblog helps.

See you around for part 24!

[sparda3g]

Food Wars! Shokugeki no Soma Chapter 271 Review

Well, this isn’t what I expected. One would wonder what’s next once the Central are dealt with. Entering the Second Year is an ideal, but what could be the next dilemma. After the introduction of the Midnight Chefs, it still wasn’t clear what the primary focus is. It was the reveal of the mastermind behind the random appearances of these underground chefs that began to interest me. This chapter delivered possibly the full reveal of the mastermind, yet it was done in a bizarre polarizing way.

It’s a shame that we didn’t get to see how Takumi stop the suspect because it look like it was a hell of a chase scene. His clothes are wet and covered with underwater materials like starfish. It would have been fun but a missed opportunity. Joking aside, he’s on panel because he does know Saiba as well, so it’s understandable to get his reaction towards the news. Besides, it’s this chapter’s version of “Previously…”

As it pointed out before, the mini-arc is over as it begins to transit to next and prominent arc. All Elite Ten members that were sent on a mission return to Tootsuki Academy for an urgent meeting. The news comes off something surreal to believe since this is Joichiro we’re talking about. That is if he decides to go the old “father is a villain” trend. Erina’s reaction is reasonable since he is her role model or inspiration. At least the relationship didn’t go Sasuke and Sakura route. Then again, is Joichiro even the villain?

I laughed at how Soma is non-chantingly with the news because he believes his father is innocent. On one hand, that’s nice of him to not falter into believing the dark turn. On the other hand, he did say that maybe it is his fault by accidentally blurted out the Shokugeki concept while drunk. Well, the trust is there, but not exactly there. It would have been hysterical if that is the root of all evil.

At least Takumi did point out the possibility of someone using Saiba as an alibi. Someone has to be smart enough to think that way. But when it comes to media, it tends to mean that the chance to be the case is low. In other words, that may not be it. Before making a phone call, there’s one problem that needs to address: who is Saiba Joichiro? I’m kind of surprised of the consistency since not only he’s not well known but the Elite Ten veterans don’t know as well.

It makes sense for Isshiki to explain since he’s the only veteran excluding Erina that knows his backstory. It’s one way to remind the fans of who he is as well as selling his amazing performance. However, there’s another reason for it, but we’ll get to that soon. Funny how Nene believes the heritage of Soma’s secret strength comes from him. I know Battle Shounen applies greatly, let alone the chosen one concept, but it doesn’t apply to him that much.

It’s also funny that Soma has called his father many times before, but he never picked up like ever. Soma has no hope for any response, but out of all time, Joichiro finally picks up the phone to Soma’s surprise. Now that’s what I call plot convenience (Haha!). Moving on. Joichiro has the nerve to act like this is his first ever phone call. Oddly enough, Soma becomes nervous or lost in train of thoughts that his dialogues become gibberish. When you take his story out of context, it does sound randomly hilarious. He was even close to call him a villain. Won’t that be bizarre? Well, this is where it does get bizarre.

I predicted that Saiba isn’t Joichiro, rather a blood relative of his. Since Takumi called out the possibility of someone robbing the name, that chance seems slim by this point. So I have to guess that he could be Joichiro’s brother. To my surprise, the reveal is here. The one called Saiba is Joichiro’s other son. Did the editor-in-chief of Weekly Shounen Jump request all series to have the lost son subplot? Haikyuu!! when?

Seriously, I didn’t expect this kind of plot twist. It’s strange to comprehend the thought of Joichiro having a son from elsewhere. Now, I can’t jump to the conclusion just yet and here’s why. First of all, Soma’s reaction is more comical than anything; leaving the reveal an open interpretation. The tone is presented in a comedy fashion for the most part, which means we shouldn’t take it that serious.

Lastly, it just so happen that Joichiro is on a battle against Saiba, who he addressed him as “Saiba-san.” This would mean that Saiba isn’t Joichiro’s son, but perhaps his apprentice, which seems the most likely choice. Recall that Joichiro went on an exploration after he lost his sight of his love for cooking. It’s likely that he tried to find his motivation and maybe he found a child to train. Think like Rocky 5, where the story revolves a retired boxer training an upcoming megastar and he sees him like a son. Also, it’s a way to pass the torch to feel winning again.

We don’t know Joichiro’s backstory entirely, especially the exploration and of course, finding the love of his life. I don’t know the fallout between him and Saiba, but it’s either because Saiba has gone dark or he was abandoned by his “father,” which probably influenced him to join the dark side. As for the name, again, perhaps Joichiro did train him hard and probably would have adopted him to inherit the name. That or he did, but that would mean abandonment is the likely choice. I don’t mind this, so long it’s handled carefully. I can’t say the same for the next part though.

Joichiro and Saiba have their battle, though it was done off-panel. Why? Because it was done for a shock value. After it was done, it goes over the reactions of many spectators; by this point, I had a bad feeling about this. Clearly, they are stunned and slowly build the anticipation of the plot twist. After Isshiki reminded the fans how powerful Joichiro is, it could mean one thing: something unbelievable is about to happen. It did.

Joichiro lost in a sweep 5-0.

I understand the shock value behind the moment. It is definitely shocking, I’ll say that much. However, it’s really strange to use Joichiro as a hype buff. You can argue that it’s an unexpected twist like, “You thought he’s the final boss, but it is him, Saiba!” It happened all the sudden. I get the intention behind the chapter to be nothing but shocking moments with Soma having a brother; blood, another family, adopted, whatever. But I would have been fine if he didn’t beat Joichiro this soon.

If he wasn’t portrayed to be so godlike, this loss would have been fine; at least, more acceptable than here. It would have been fine as well if Saiba defeats someone else that is strong, but not as godly. Someone like Shinomiya would have been fine to use, even though I like the guy. That would have surprised me in a reasonable manner. I guess Editor-in-chief of Weekly Shounen Jump also want bosses to have only one battle after hype boost. Then again, we seen a lot before their defeat, but still.

The only way that can help this is Joichiro didn’t go all out, which would lessen the damage but not cure it. It could be like how another series once did an off-panel battle that left fans wondering how the outcome was determined. Basically, the off-panel battle can be used for a hidden agenda. The only backup to it is their relationship. I can see maybe Joichiro has a soft spot and didn’t want to go all out, especially since Saiba is on the dark side. If they were strangers, then this doesn’t apply here. It’s a possibility, so don’t bet on it.

The chapter ends with the declaration of the man to be called Saiba Asahi. We get a glimpse of his face, who looks sinister as this series can get. He looks like someone from Prince of Tennis or what if Saeki draws a cool-looking Haikyuu!! character. It must be the hair. His next destination is to meet his “brother,” so this arc is about to escalate quickly. I wonder if he knows Shokugeki through Joichiro or did he attend the academy before. I guess we’ll know soon enough.

This was a strange chapter to behold. I can understand the reactions and overreactions toward the development, but I’m not going to go rampage until this arc is done. That said the first impression is a shaky one that tested the fans’ patience. While there’s some parts that I like, there’s some that I am iffy with. Seriously, is “lost brother” a trend? Is that how Jujutsu Kaisen is getting popular? Anyway, the visual is pretty good as usual. What Earth-shattering (probably literally) development is coming next? There goes the chance for “Kono Uragirimono!!" Sad…