#but also the one song itself is like absolutely up my alley

[regular-ordinary-human]

Dear Spotify,

Just because I heard one breakcore(?) song on an Instagram reel and wanted to listen to it does not mean that you should flood my recommended music with every single artist who is doing obscene things to the Amen break.

Love,

Me

[red-riding-wood]

Yellow Light

Pairing: Jonathan Crane x F!Reader

Summary: Jonathan is your guide as you escape Arkham Asylum.

Based off the song "Yellow Light" by Of Monsters and Men (original version here and acoustic version here). This song is really special to me and helped me brave my heart surgery in August. A lot of this fic is a projection of my own experiences, trauma, and health issues over the past several years -- but Arkham can represent absolutely anything you want it to that you or the character is trying to escape.

Song lyrics are in bold.

Warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, depictions of PTSD (hospital trauma specifically), drug addiction/use, psychosis, hallucinations, fear of death, blood.

Will also use similar themes to my upcoming series "Darkness Until Dawn" and OC Cassie Hart but this is a standalone x reader fic.

I also feel like Crane might come across a bit OOC in this fic because he's in an established relationship with the reader and he's in a comforting role, but I promise I have some very fucked-up stuff for him coming up where he's an absolute menace.

WC: 3309

Sounds of Hell threaded themselves into the night air. Howling, bleating, baying down the streets. Whispering thoughts of death into your ears. Thoughts that formed into icy talons that raked down your spine, that stirred goosebumps along the bare flesh of your arms. That froze you in place, your heart slamming against your ribs as they tethered you to the cold concrete like vines.

Frantic looks cast to your left, to your right, you turned, stumbling over your own feet as you whirled, the darkness of each alleyway sinking into your soul. Staring back at you as if to say, you cannot escape me.

I’m looking for a place to start. Everything feels so different now.

Which way was out? Which way was back there? Back to the dingy halls of Arkham, the acrid stench of spoiled cafeteria food, the howling of patients that still seemed to echo back to you from the alleys.

The maw of a great beast parted, razors of teeth glinting silver in the dark, stretching from one brick wall to another. Hurtling towards you, wisps of black smoke emerging from the darkness and curling round you like hissing tongues. The roar started as a peal of thunder, and ended as a shockwave, razor teeth shattering into glass as the beast collided against your skull. Dizzying waves sent the world spinning, brought you to your knees before the Devil himself.

She’s good as dead.

The beast’s maw burned hot as hellfire, breathing smoke into your aching lungs, ripples of molten lava racing beneath your skin. Teeth tore into your shoulder as your hand met the ground, shaking fingers settling into the grooves of the concrete like cold tiles. Death’s talons wrapped around your throat as a cry twisted from your larynx, pointed nails morphing to scalpels and tearing down your sternum, splitting open your ribs and baring your bleeding heart.

Crimson freckled the concrete, splatters of your blood landing hot and thick against the back of your hand as cold washed over each limb, the darkness creeping in from the corners of the alleys. You reached your free hand to your forehead, and nearly cried out again in pain, but you couldn’t speak; something sharp wedged itself between your fingers, something sticky attaching webs of hair against your clammy palm.

Your hand came away with a shard of glass protruding from the stretch of skin between your fingers, red dribbling down flesh too pale to be living.

Your stomach buckled, and you curled in on yourself, eyes rolling to the back of your throbbing skull and voices pouring in like a tide.

Get back here! She’s running. Running away. Where does she think she’s going? She’s not going anywhere. She can’t escape us. You can’t escape us.

Patients rattled the bars of their cages, threw themselves against their padded walls. Screeched warnings and mournful wails and haunted cries into the stale air of the hospital, into the icy chill of night.

Fingers seized into talons as they closed around your ears, attempting to block out the noise as it built into a terrifying crescendo, wails and whispers melding together as if the darkness were mocking you but the chill that swathed your impotent form reminded you of your isolation.

GET OUT! your lips parted to say but fell silent upon the words of the damned. Let me go. Let me go, let me go.

Warmth brushed your shoulder, and you blinked saline from your eyes, streaking salt down your lip, dampened hair falling over blurry vision as you looked up to the hand held to you in the darkness. The white cuff of a shirt disappearing beneath a black suit.

Just grab hold of my hand. I will lead you through this wonderland.

And his voice, soft and warm and human, cut through the noise. Hollowed a path through the tunnel of voices and breathed life into lungs that gasped for air. Sent a tremble of fear through death’s icy talons and made the demons crawl back into the earth.

I’m here, he said.

You couldn’t straighten your claw-like grip as it brushed the warmth of his hand, but his fingers entwined in yours and the glass split his palm and bled over your knuckles and he pulled, your shoulder screaming in pain and your legs wobbly beneath you, but you stood.

Your fingers balled into a fist, the touch of his hand dissolving like a pill in water, like sutures that held you to together for one moment only to leave you in pieces, scarred and bruised and broken. For a moment, you thought you’d fall again.

Faintly, a glow emerged from the blackness, silhouetting the lazy fall of a feather, so tranquil in contrast to the tendrils of ink black that writhed in your peripheral. You swiped a hand out to the feather, its softness akin to his hand, but the voices hissed at you to look up.

The jagged peaks of the skyscrapers groaned above, folding in across the dim sky and curling into black tides that came crashing around you as pressure mounted in your skull.

The darkness devoured you. 

Water up to my knees. But sharks are swimming in the sea.

The ocean came flooding in around you, dampness seeping into the cuffs of your trousers, rising as the blackness pressed in around you. Ahead, the light glinted yellow, casting a thin line of white against the waves. The feather bobbed along the surface, chased by current that now buffeted the backs of your knees.

One foot placed before the other, you waded through the water, each step weighing heavier than the last. Each time, the light ahead grew just a little brighter, though the sides of your vision darker.

Wretched creatures began to emerge from the darkness, hissing and snarling and reaching for you in tendrils of smoke and ink. Gravity began to pull you downward, the current guiding you forwards as the alleyway morphed into a tunnel, and the voices of the underworld rang louder in your skull as you descended into the bowels of the city.

She’s heading into the darkness. The rot.

A giggle, echoing against the walls of the chamber that reeked of all things barren and desolate. Her mind’s a disease.

The reach of death grew thick here, in twisted ropes and vines that swallowed the arched ceiling, that bore down on you like snakes and streaked through the sea like eels of tar, the water itself no longer seeming so heavy in comparison as they engulfed each limb. Tightening. Shuddering.

She can’t get very far. She’s killing herself.

She has to. She has to live.

The voices were starting to argue.

Some were even voices you knew; they came to you past the iron bars nestled into pockets of your memories, depressions in the walls – people you’d known in that awful place cried out to you, cursed you, their faces fuzzy but still recognisable even in the darkness. Fellow souls trapped in the place that knew not of the sun’s warmth against your skin or the whistle of freedom through the wind.

Look. Look, girl.

Your brow furrowed, and your eyes scanned the darkness. With each face they landed on, the symphony of wails seemed to spike in volume along to the frantic thud of your heart, the little weaving line of a monitor etching itself across your mind’s eye.

Not there. No, not there.

Can’t she feel it?

It’s too late. The rot has her.

Soon it will reach her soul.

Your heart came lurching to a burning throat as the waters stirred and a creature emerged from their murky depths, slivers of metal protruding from its back before it disappeared, for half a moment resembling the wicked tips of syringes that still pricked your swiftly numbing skin.

Tearing your hands from the water, you froze, paralysis seeping in to every pore.

Ink tendrils snaked across the pallor of your flesh. From your fingertips to your elbows, the rot had taken you. It tightened round your forearm, your fingers turning completely numb.

You screamed.

Shhhhh, he soothed. Just come to me, darling. I’ll make it all better.

“JONATHAN!” Your mangled cry turned into something intelligible, the name sweet like honey on your tongue despite the bitterness of bile at the back of your throat.

Just follow my yellow light. And ignore all those big warning signs.

You began to slosh through the water, seeking him out in a frenzy, your teeth gritting as the walls of your skull began to cave in, as the rot spread to your shoulders and turned the water to pitch.

And at last, you saw him. Like the feather, silhouetted by the light, but unmistakably him. He paused, looking over his shoulder, strands of his black hair wisping this way and that. His face was shadowed, the sockets of his eyes black. The frames of his glasses glinted silver in the dark, like the teeth, the scalpels.

And he disappeared round the corner that twisted, walls shifting and shuddering as if forming a maze for a path.

Death’s icy fingers pried their way beneath your skin as the cold seeped past your blood and bones and settled somewhere deep inside the dwindling warmth of your soul. Freed from the water at last, you turned the corner and raised a rot-wreathed hand to the light fractured by a criss-cross pattern that reminded you of the bars of the asylum’s gate.

And the damp air became dry and musty, and the sewers morphed into dingy halls, alabaster wallpaper peeling back to reveal the black rot. Your pace quickened as these walls closed in, groaning with curses of the damned.

Just a little farther, the soothing, slightly-lilted baritones of his voice encouraged you on, but every turn you made down the narrowing halls, he managed to evade you, disappearing just out of reach. At the end of each hallway, what must’ve been a sewer drain and not a gate yawned from the blackness, little pockets of light stretching wider with each turn.

The feather crunched beneath your toes.

Fingers wrapped around the bars of the gate, and the hinges squealed as it swung open, your feet slotting into indentations along the walls as you desperately attempted to pull yourself up.

Warmth made you shiver in your cold sweat, and whispers funnelled into thin threads and lay buried beneath the ground as his hand met yours. In the faint glimmer of the light, you witnessed the rot dissipate, chased away by his touch. Purified.

“Jonathan,” you breathed, pulled flush to his chest, the mint of his breath raking across your lashes and the familiarity of his musk inhaled deeply through flared nostrils. You buried your face in his wrinkled tie and dress shirt and sobbed, your tears still tasting like saline. You savoured this moment, trembling beneath his touch, his hand petting the back of your dampened hair. You pulled away only as he hissed in pain.

“Jonathan, I’m scared,” you whimpered, guilty that you had seemed to wound him but caring only for sanctuary in this moment in which you knew nothing but fear. “Please don’t leave me. I’m so, so scared.”

“I know you are,” he said, squeezing your shoulder. “But you have to keep going.”

“Where? Where are you taking me?” You stared into the hollows of his eyes, still pitch black past the glint of those silver frames. Why couldn’t you properly see him? Could he see you? Was he just another shadow, a trick of light on the wall?   

Somewhere deep in the dark, a howling beast hears us talk.

Sirens wailed from the alley behind, and your blood ran cold. Jonathan stepped away, his touch tearing from yours almost painfully. Like he’d left the shards of glass in your palms.

“Don’t let them take me!” You pleaded, stumbling forward through the darkness. “I can’t go back! I can’t! COME BACK!”

She’s so afraid. So pathetic. She can’t do this without him.

The light grew in intensity, tinted more gold now than yellow, bathing the walls in a soft glow as they drew impossibly close, tapering the air in your lungs, building the pressure against your temples until your shoulders sagged under the weight of fatigue and white-hot fire cleaved your skull in two.

Jonathan paused, and turned. “Close your eyes,” he told you. “It’s not so dark here when you embrace it.”

I dare you to close your eyes. And see all the colours in disguise.

“NO!” You screeched, afraid that if you so much as blinked, he’d disappear, and you’d be lost to the darkness forever. You lurched forward on your heel, wedging yourself between the shuddering walls that closed in around you, following the same – and only path – he had taken. Turning sideways, you gulped in a breath of air, fingers scraping madly against the brick walls as the tide beginning to pool again round your ankles. The sky collapsed, pinning you, forcing your only breath from your lungs and snapping your ribs around your stuttering heart.

She’s gone. She won’t make it. She can’t reach him.

The air grew stuffy, stale. Your own breath bounced off the walls and flushed your cold, tear-streaked cheeks.

“Just trust me,” Jonathan said. “Just let go.”

Running into the night. The earth is shaking and I see a light.

With the darkness claiming you and the ground beneath you quaking with wrath, the howls of the damned echoing through a familiar hall, the world swaying on its axis, you had no choice but to suffocate your fear, to shutter your eyes closed on the light that seeped through the crack in the walls, warm against your skin in the cold dread of night.

She’s giving up.

She’s fighting.

She wants to die.

She wants to live.

The yellow-gold exploded across the backs of your eyelids, streaking like fireworks along the pitch black. Your skull still throbbed in pain, and your lips parted, the sound of a window banging against old hinges as death whispered to you through the alleys, the sewers, the hallways.

Next time.

Jonathan’s touch met your clammy palm, and the world fell silent, the walls disappearing around you and the emptiness of air spilling around your limbs.

I’m here, he reminded you.

The light is blinding my eyes, as the soft walls eat us alive.

Your eyelids peeled back to reveal the checkered, rose pattern of your wallpaper, the bright fluorescents of the bathroom, the blue eyes that bore into your own past silver frames. Slivers of ice encroaching on ink black pupils, cold and calculating yet echoing a familiar warmth.

He loosened the makeshift tourniquet from your arm, pins and needles racing from your fingertips to your elbow. A syringe of your favourite poison lay on the bathroom tile, beige powder swirling in a sea of saline.

“Come back to me. Come back to me, please,” he begged, as if for this moment alone, he allowed himself to believe in the higher power you knew he cursed.

Water seeped into your clothing like the sea of pitch, spilling from the bathtub that you had left on. It carried little rivulets of crimson around a minefield of glass. He didn’t seem very concerned with turning it off right now, despite always bitching at you about saving electricity or water. His eyes were on you, and only you.

“Jonathan,” you mumbled weakly, though you thought you screamed; your eyelids fluttered and your heart pounded faster in your chest as the darkness threatened to spill across your vision again. Your nails dug past the fabric of his suit, gripping his arm tight so that he could never let you go.

“I’m here,” he breathed, and reached his other hand around your neck to cup your head, to bring you forward. You glimpsed the white ceramic of the bathroom sink, bloodied where you’d tried to steady yourself with your hand after you’d bashed your skull against the mirror – your ineffectual attempt to cast the demons out. Glass shards lay scattered against the tile. Fragments of your broken reflection.

You still remembered the haunted look you’d hoped to banish from your eyes.

“You have to get your head out of that place,” he murmured against your scalp, his fingers bloody and sticky as he brushed shards of glass from your hair, seemingly immune to the pain. “You’re not in hospital anymore. You’re here. With me. You have to come back to me.”

Your lower lip trembled. “I can’t escape them,” you admitted, voice a mere whimper. “I can’t escape it. You’re here to take me back, aren’t you? You’re gonna lock me up.”

For a moment, you really thought that he might; his palm still rested, warm and bleeding, against your cheek, but his cold blue eyes studied you not as his lover but as his patient, assessing your condition. He sighed, as if disappointed. Shame crawled its way beneath your skin like the cockroaches that had infested the asylum’s lower wards. You had always been so desperate for his approval, he rarely saw this side of you since your rehabilitation. It wasn’t until slivers of ice shattered into twin pools of blue fire that relief began to seep into you, slow and warm but whelming.

“No. No, I’m not,” he said, voice gentle, soothing. Blue eyes glanced to your head again. “Though, you are showing symptoms of a concussion…”

Your heart sped in your chest, and the icy talons of death speared your soul, the darkness hedging the borders of your vision. Innerved by your fear, you reached for the bottle of tiny white pills that lay open, haphazard next to you. But the warmth of his hand left your face, and your fingers clenched around nothing. In a blur of movement, Jonathan threw the bottle at the toilet and it clattered against the back of the seat. You jolted, gasping, wincing as the jagged teeth of the beast sliced through your clothing.

“You prescribed me those,” you told him. “They’re supposed to make me better. You said so yourself.”

“I’ll fill you a new prescription tomorrow. Taper you off. They were no good for you,” he said, and laced his fingers through the bloodied locks of your hair. Pulled your forehead to his so that your breaths became one, and the demons in your skull grew muffled, and his warmth chased away the icy touch of death.

“What am I gonna do?” you whimpered, sobbing, hands grasping feebly at whatever you could grab hold of – his sleeve, his tie, his collar. You felt as if your soul, your mind, were laying in fragments around you like the glass, and no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t piece them back together. “I just want to be free. I just want to be okay.”

“I know.” He inhaled, closing his eyes, and his grip tightened on your hair, scalp stinging slightly at the almost needy action. Like in this moment he was more afraid of losing you than you were him.

Even he thinks she’s a lost cause.

And Jonathan was never one to utter false truths; because you knew this about him, his silence unnerved you. But finally, after what could’ve been hours or minutes of your pitiful sobbing and the endless drone of the tub, the trickling of water against the tile, he said,

“I’ll be right here, darling. All you need to do is take my hand.” The warmth of his palm slotted into your own, and you wove your fingers so tight that your knuckles turned white around the blood that trickled down both your wrists from the jagged glass that barbed your flesh. A seal. A pact.

“I will see you through this,” he said. “All of it. I promise.”

MASTERLIST • REQUEST

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[lonelyroommp3]

honestly could you just straight up review every song on brat

deal

360 - functions perfectly as an album opener (and i appreciate the work it puts in to set up the far superior 365 at the end) but doesn't do much for me as a standalone song. i'm not sure if this is actually a problem with the song itself or if i just dislike the post-ironic nyc it girl culture featured in the music video so much that i now have beef with the song as a consequence

club classics - i have not heard this song while off my face in a grotty warehouse club in an east london industrial estate and as a result i don't feel i can truly give it the impartial ranking it deserves just yet. this is not a song that reaches its full potential in any other setting

sympathy is a knife - i don't find myself returning to this song often but i do objectively think it bangs hugely. i just have surprisingly little to say about it honestly

i might say something stupid - huge song, and yet so small at the same time. it is very rare that i call a sub-2 minute song perfect because i'm 5minutesongfucker420 but it comes in, says what it needs to, and rips your heart out in the process. i go back and forth comparing brat and melodrama quite often (SORRY CHARLI, I KNOW YOU HAVE A SONG ABOUT THIS COMING UP) because they're both Party Girl Concept Albums and to me this is brat's "liability" in terms of early album moment of complete braking-hard-and-hitting-the-wall vulnerability.

talk talk - SOOOO fun. absolutely love the production on this one, right up my alley, i am also a huge sucker for a big fun song about having a crush. i would also like to shout out this song for ruining any international sporting event where france and spain face off because all i can ever think is TALK TO ME IN FRENCH TALK TO ME IN SPANISH TALK TO ME IN YOUR OWN MADE UP LANGUAGE

von dutch - absolutely gigantic and a perfect opening single to set the tone of the era. those massive revving synths encapsulate the sound of what i thought clubbing would be like when i was about 13 years old. also a perfect confidence boost song - i have strutted at olympic racewalker speed down the street with this blasting in my airpods more times than i would care to admit

BONUS: the various von dutch remixes - i don't always subscribe to the "if it ain't broke don't fix it" rule of remixes (for example, to go on a complete tangent, i adore both deadmau5's original raise your weapon and the madeon extended remix because they do entirely different things equally well) but nothing in the von dutch remixes make me think yeah, this is worthy of existing alongside the original and adds something cool and interesting and different to the track that i wasn't already getting from the og. the one exception i'd make is, of course, addison rae's extremely cunty scream in the a.g. cook remix but i'm not going to keep returning to an entire remix for just one fun moment that's already been oversaturated on tiktok

everything is romantic - i will confess, for all i claim to be an open minded enjoyer of music and a fan of Insane Tracks For The Club, initially the jagged production was a bit jarring to me and i thought yeah, i probably won't be coming back to this song. and now i'm obsessed with it. however it does make the children (me) yearn for the mediterranean and as a result i will be invoicing charli for the damage to my bank account when the day inevitably comes that i listen to this song too many times after half a bottle of wine and immediately book myself an italian weekend getaway

rewind - first time i heard this i was like oh okay we're getting into the slightly more fillery second third of the album, it's a fine song but not quite on the level of all that has come before it. and now it is one of my absolute favourites. i also LOVE how direct and specific the lyrics are on this track, which is something i normally beef with when it comes to a lot of contemporary pop music but the difference is 1) charli is good at it 2) her delivery is so direct that it sort of dares you to sit still and listen without criticising it. incredibly strong song

so i - a genuinely beautiful song that i rarely listen to because it makes me feel like i am intruding on something. i think the fact that it exists out in the world on this album is a wonderful thing and the most perfect tribute to sophie & full circle moment when it comes to charli's insecurities around working with her - "when i make songs i remember things you'd suggest... would you like this one? maybe just a little bit?" - but at the same time i'm always like. i kind of feel like i shouldn't be listening to this

girl, so confusing - the original is a lovely little paradox. i enjoyed it enough on my first listen and the lorde version quite simply would not exist, let alone be as impactful as it is, without it, but now that the lorde version exists i don't want to listen to any other version. the remix is almost certainly going to be my top brat track of the year

apple - initially a skip, then i had a moment of realisation that it is in fact the best marina and the diamonds song written in years (that froot looks familiar, i suppose), and then it rapidly became overplayed as the result of, to be fair, the very good and fun tiktok dance that i still do on instinct every time i hear the song. i think instead of riding the wave of its virality by releasing it to radio as a single etc charli should lock this one in a vault for about three months so nobody can listen to it and then when it comes back we'll all be like oh yeah wait this is a really good little song

b2b - love it, was my immediate fave out of the club classics/b2b double single release, but once again i feel like i've not yet heard it at its full potential (inside a cramped and small and extremely sweaty basement club when i'm 8 shots deep planning a terribly ill advised pulling mission)

mean girls - the thing is i think it's a fun enough song as a storytelling concept if you view it as Just A Little Fun Song, also i love the production, a little bit of house-y piano is always going to hit for me. the issue is i've already told you what i think about the post-ironic it girl subculture this song is about and i think if you actively listen to this song and go wowwwww she gets me then you need to have your internet access forcibly removed for at least six months until you calm down and develop a personality outside of the red scare podcast and pretentious "overrated vs underrated" columns hosted by wannabe substack celebrities. also the thing is this song is going to be dated within the year, which is a shame bc it does, musically, go

i think about it all the time - this song should NOT hit as hard as it does considering i staunchly plan on never having children. i cannot relate to the sentiment behind it at all but charli paints such a beautiful and vivid picture with her lyrics (all perfectly intertwined with that understated, quietly pulsating production) that you can't help but have an emotional connection to it. beautiful and vulnerable and a really perfect moment of quiet towards the end of the album

365 - first of all, a perfectly placed song when it comes to encapsulating those dizzy night out mood swings of "wait. should i settle down and have children.... nvm let's go back inside and do coke". second of all, as a musical theatre girlie to my core i love ANY song that reprises an earlier theme and this not only repurposes the 360 stems excellently but actively improves on the earlier track. thirdly, i think charli's "okay, OKAYYYY" at the beginning of the song is a flawless and fun way of rounding out the album - it really feels like she's bringing you back into it, going OKAY let's do this one last time, are you FUCKING READY, etc. fourthly, it's just FUN. definitely a standout track to me

hello goodbye - LOVEEEE, i do greatly enjoy and appreciate charli's more experimental music but i can't lie. sometimes she releases a fairly straightforward poppy banger and it just hits the spot. like this

guess - YOU WANNA GUESS THE COLOUR OF MY UNDERWEAR YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT I'VE GOT GOING ON DOWN THERE IS IT PRETTY IN PINK OR ALL SEE THROUGH IS IT SHOWING OFF MY BRAND NEW LOWER BACK TATTOO. btw the billie eilish verse on the remix slays, i know this is a charli review but i love that billie has devoted her first two explicitly gay singles to being just outrageously horny with it, you go girl, i think the discourse around the song is so unbelievably daft and we need to settle down and have fun

spring breakers - i know this is a fan fave that people were begging to put on the album but i just simply do not care about it. sorry

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

|| A Swallow's Symphony in Spring ||

!! This fanfiction is rated mature!!!! Please heed the warnings and read at your own risk !!

Hello all!! Welcome to my masterpost for this years @tss-storytime !!! I'm so, so excited to share this one with you all! This idea has been in the works for a whole long while now.

Hugeee shout out to @ax3-e0ns for the absolutely BEAUTIFUL ART they've done for my fic <3 which you can find here:

Also huge thanks to @the-princey-pie for all your help with worldbuilding, character design and the fic title itself. Thank you to @sleepy-nova-tea for being an amazing cheerleader and brainstorm buddy and @greymillieattheball for your awesome beta reading <33 I couldn't have done this without you guys!!!!

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Roman, Prince of Hirundia, and now heir to the throne after the tragic death of his older twin was perfect. He stood up straight, he did as his mother commanded and he said everything that they wanted to hear. Roman was not suffering, because Princes do not suffer. At least not in the eyes of their kingdom. 

A revolution brews in the back alleys and streets while Roman remains unaware, a new Royal guard joins their force as Roman’s personal guard and despite their first impressions he warms up to Virgil quickly, and despite everything, Virgil seems to like him too - but when everything falls apart and the palace is seized by the people, what was Roman supposed to do with the fact that he was in love with a traitor?

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Warnings:

Abuse (physical and psychological), minor animal abuse, controlling/manipulative parents, past malnourishment/talk about starvation, past major character death, past parental death, nightmares. Violence/murder (non-graphic). Unsympathetic OCs, alcohol, 'off screen' execution, depression, ptsd.

This fic does end happily.

Pairings: Romantic Prinxiety, background QPR Loceit, romantic Remile and Thomas/Nico

Word Count: 57,851

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+ Chapter 1 - Come Wander Quietly +

+ Chapter 2 - And Listen to the Wind +

+ Chapter 3 - Hear the Trumbling in the Stone +

+ Chapter 4 - And Watch the Swallows as they Fly +

+ Chapter 5 - Strike Confusion from your Soul +

+ Chapter 6 - In The Night +

+ Chapter 7 - Come Here and Listen to the Sky +

+ Chapter 8 - Come Walking High +

+ Chapter 9 - Above the Rolling of the sea +

+ Chapter 10 - And will the Swallows Come Again? +

+ Chapter 11 - The Calling of a Hundred Thousand Voices +

+ Chapter 12 - While the Swallows Roam Alone +

+ Chapter 13 - Do you Hear the Angry Bells Ringing in the Night? +

+ Chapter 14 - Do you Hear the Swallows When They've Flown? +

+ Chapter 15 - There is no Sorrow like the Murmur of Their Wings +

+ Chapter 16 - There is no Choir Like Their Song +

+ Chapter 17 - Will Some Loving Ease Your Pain? +

+ Chapter 18 - The Breezes Blow the Petals from your Hand +

+ Epilogue - There is no Power like the Freedom of Their Flight

+

Chapter titles taken from 'Swallow Song' by Joan Beaz

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Tags: @full-of-roman-angst-trash @your-local-random-dino @cutebisexualmess @glacierreblogs @roseianxiety @bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti @scalesfeathersnfur @oatmeal-stans-the-trash-rat @littlerat2 ( if anyone wants to be added, let me know!)

[whollyjoly]

Hi Em!! Thank you so much for putting together such an amazing ask game 🩵 I hope you’re doing well. Would you mind answering 1, 4, 17 and 25? Take care 🩵

hello hello my dear!! its been my absolute pleasure seeing everyone spread the good vibes, so im glad people are enjoying this 🥰

im sorry its so late, but here are my answers!

1 - what is your fav part about being in the fandom?

i wrote a super sappy and long answer here, but basically all of YOU is what makes this fandom the most fun to be a part of!

4 - whats a moodboard that you just want to live inside of?

ohhhhhhhh so many?? the moodboard creators in this fandom are fucking TOP TIER and i love all of them so much!! but here's a few that come to mind:

this christmas babe and gene moodboard by @footprintsinthesxnd is so comfy and so cozy and they deserve nice christmases okay!!

speaking of christmas moodboards, @onlyyouexisthere has this incredibly aesthetic board for some of our fav boys around christmas time, and i just want to live inside every single one okay??

this speirs moodboard by the one and only @xxluckystrike is so beautiful? like i love the combo of hard and soft edges (the bandage + the smoke + the chess), since i feel like that dichotomy isnt something thats always shown with speirs, but feels so true with his character. anyways i want to walk through a museum with blood on my knuckles and smoke in my lungs after looking at this okay

and of course, this chuck grant moodboard by the incredible the amazing YOU @sweetxvanixlla was one of the first things i saw and loved in the fandom for grant?? the beach vibes, the light blues, the carefree energy, it all is so perfect. and i was like "holy SHIT this is good also now i too love grant" so i can thank you for that 🥰

bonus from @the-cinnamontography-is-amazing that i cant stop laughing at it

17 - your fav fanwork about an underrated character?

oh i was HOPING to get this because there's this one fic i love SO MUCH and i just!! want to scream about it from the rooftops!!

Come In From The Cold by rebelsquad (T, 24k) is a Smokey-centric Coffee Shop AU, and it just warms my heart in all the best ways. First of all, Smokey is an incredible narrator, and I love how the author captures his voice in this so hard!! I also just love that it centers around some of the more underrated characters (Smokey, Alley, Shifty, Tab, Skinny, and Popeye), but also has great interactions with the regulars as well! The found family vibes are just *chefs kiss*, and it is also the perfect mood for winter ✨ I cannot recommend it enough!!

25 - what colors do your mutuals most remind you of?

i dont even know why this turned out like this? but i went full vibes ✨

@sweetxvanixlla - midnight blue feels so right for you, my dear. starry nights and deep blue velvet cushions, something steady and calm but sparkles in just the right light. a cup of herbal tea on a tuesday night, and the thrum of a quiet city hums beneath your tongue. theres something so quiet and still about the night, that moment when people are talking and you dont have to participate, you just sit and let their words flow over you, enjoy their presence and energy and that feeling is midnight blue.

@xxluckystrike - girl, you are golden. warmth and positivity and laughter that itself is a kind of music, just as much as the songs you love and share and make art for. its the type of gold you feel on a late summer day, echoing up from the passenger seat of a convertible as you drive with your friend across a rolling field of wheat, of corn, of wildflowers. there's soda in the cupholders, and the carbonation matches the bubbles springing from the bottom of your lungs. sunny, summery, golden.

@malarkgirlypop - pink. the snap of a piece of bubble gum, the sugar rush from a strawberry lollipop, the pop of a bright shade of lipstick, quirked up into a smirk. your presence is loud and beautiful like the sound of a boombox atop a vespa, zipping through a busy beachside pier and delighting everyone who hears. pink is the feeling of just being yourself, unashamedly and wildly, and reveling in the wake of your energy.

@panzershrike-pretz - green, but that vibrant green of the sun hitting a park just right, and there's almost a glow, or a halo, across the field. it's the kind of green reserved for grass stains, made after the first spring day that's warm enough to go and spend time outside. it's the color of collapsing in a cackling heap after goofing around with your friends, and they're laughing because you're laughing because they're laughing. what are you laughing about? it doesnt matter, maybe its nothing, maybe its the cow chewing away on the green grass in the distance. no matter, because it is joy.

@footprintsinthesxnd - idk why but lavender is the immediate thing that comes to mind? something calm and soothing and steady, a breath of fresh air, walking through a field with the sun on your neck and the smell of the purple flowers filling the air. a gentle breeze ripples across your fingertips. it's quiet, but not silent, and the lavender doesnt break in the wind - it bends, and the flower seems to brighten in response. your energy is the deep breath that is taken after that moment - content and at ease.

@blood-mocha-latte - so this might not make sense outside my head but...that color a candle flame gives when reflected off a marble statue. something in the liminal space between warmth and cool, between hard and soft, between cold creams and whites and bright oranges and yellows. the ethereal quality of walking through a gallery alone, silent save for the feeling welling up from each piece of art you pass. the tiles echo this soft color, the flickering candle makes the shadows across the paintings dance, and one can't help but want to explore further, to linger with the treasures you've created.

@ronsparky - sky blue, but not the crayola sky blue. the sky blue of an early morning on the top of a mountain, mist obscuring pieces of the horizon and you could convince yourself you are the only human on the planet. a sky blue that rivals on being crisp and soft, that suggests unlimited possibility if you just reached your hand out a little farther. one can't help but feel that every small, new thing from this view is a joy - and its a feeling so wondrous and contagious that you cant help but spread it to those you interact with. the sky shifts, ever so slightly, but the color follows you down the mountain.

@georgieluz - red, but not quite. a bird flitters into view from where you sit on a bench in a forested park. its winter, and the trees feel bare and lonely. surprisingly, the bird isnt a pigeon - it's a vermillion flycatcher. the bird stands out triumphantly against the monochrome sky as if a beacon, or a challenge to some higher power that says i am here. its bold, its singular, and one cant help but admire the sheer presence of this small vermillion creature. but when it opens its beak and sings, the trees dont look so lonely any more.

@next-autopsy - you know that color when a fire burns down, and the embers are glowing with a deep mahogany? the edges of smoke dont obscure the color or heat from the coals, it only seems to make them more ephemeral. its a mesmerizing color, its the feeling where you want so desperately to stretch out your fingers and know what that heartbeat of fire feels like, and although the burn doesnt completely dissuade you, you still pull your hand back. the dancing mahogany glows a little brighter, then dimmer, as if in time with your breathing.

@onlyyouexisthere - the words "pale green" dont quite do justice to the vibes your presence gives off. the softest pale green? cashmere, the color of mint leaves reflecting morning dew? maybe that's the closest, the feeling of looking out over a snow-brushed hill, hands warmed by a mug of silver needle tea, wrapped in a cozy cashmere sweater. something comforting but crisp, familiar but fresh, nostalgic but new. something pale green.

@land-sh - one time, i was on an airplane flying across the arctic. it was the middle of the night, and i looked out the window and slowly, over the course of two hours, watched the sun rise. the sky started as a pitch black, stars breaking up the endless void, and slowly, one color at a time it lightened into a blindingly bright day. but there was a moment, about 37 minutes in, and im pretty sure everyone on the plane was asleep. outside, all i could see was this deep, vast purple. it felt like there could be anything and everything beyond that color, and i was the only in the universe who would ever see it. idk why, but thats the color and vibe that comes to mind when i think of you.

@coco-bean-1218 - see, i thought about chocolate brown for you before i even realized that its just your username. but maybe its more than chocolate, maybe something closer to chestnut. you're that feeling when you walk through an orchard, it's november, and although the sun is shining its the kind of sun that seems to make everything more crisp than warm. as you walk through, there's a small crunch under your shoe - a chestnut. there's a deeply satisfying smell in the air, something woody and comforting, and you just want to get lost in the rows upon rows of chestnut brown dotting the branches and littering ground.

@samwinchesterslostshoe - okay so bear with me on this one - slate gray. the slate gray of a city on a rainy day, clouds and sky and sidewalk almost blending together into one entity. you duck into a coffee shop you never would have noticed if not for the weather. at first, you think the walls are just reflecting the color from the outside, and you feel a lonely pang. but then, you notice it - art, stickers, little notes of love written in sharpie and tucked in the space between tables. they stand out among the walls, and the absence of color makes their presence even brighter. and the coffee? so good. it's the best you've ever had, and you realize the coffee shop is just like the walls - you find beauty you never would have noticed without the slate gray of the sky.

....so i have no idea if any of this makes sense outside of my head, but here we are. if i missed you i am so sorry!!!

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

okay okay i am sorry this is so long-winded. i am in fact, a long-winded bitch.

but thank you so much for asking this, and for just being such a wonderful part of our community! i hope your day goes super well!! 💕💕

[maricervantes]

[ priscilla quintana, cis woman, she/her ] — whoa! MARIANA CERVANTES just stole my cab! not cool, but maybe they needed it more. they have lived in the city for FOUR YEARS, working as a/an STRIPPER AT EMERALDS/ACTRESS. that can’t be easy, especially at only 32 YEARS OLD. some people say they can be a little bit TEMPERMENTAL and RESERVED, but i know them to be KINDHEARTED and AMBITIOUS. whatever. i guess i’ll catch the next cab. hope they like the ride back to MANHATTAN! — 

drugs mention tw

Mariana Cervantes grew up an only child in a house with a very old fashioned, overprotective father and overly worried mother. Her father never wanted her to have any guy friends, refused to let her hang out with friends much outside of school, and absolutely forbid her to go to parties. Her mother was more lenient and would often drop Mari off at her friends’ houses, parties, and sometimes even her boyfriend’s houses but she just didn’t allow her daughter to be out late at night because that worried her too much. Overall, though, life in the Cervantes household wasn’t bad and she loved her family more than life itself. She also grew up very interested and attached to her culture, something that’s never changed even as she got older. And at a young age she learned how to speak and write in Spanish.

As a child she loved game nights with the family because that usually meant they would sit around the tv and watch whatever sport was playing that night. She was especially a fan of the boxing, basketball, and soccer nights. And she was huge into acting, especially live theatre. The moment she saw the movie Chicago, Mariana began this dream in her head to star in the show one day. Her rebellious phase didn’t kick in until her high school year, like most kids at that age, and it was during this time that she began sneaking out late at night. She would often sneak out to parties, sometimes going to car meet ups (mostly always resulted in illegal racing), or to whatever club she could sneak into (she loves to dance), but always coming back home just before sunrise.

Rather than head to university, Mariana roamed the open roads with her friends for a while. She occasionally popped in at home to let her parents she was still alive, perhaps get a few bucks, but for the most part Mariana lived life on the road. She would perform 80's cover songs to get her share of money in for their little gang, each of them did something to contribute. By the time she stumbled in NYC, Mariana was tired of living life on the road. With what little money she had saved up the girl put a down payment on a small little apartment in Manhattan. It felt like this was the start of something good for her, like she might actually be able to make it as an actress. But that dream proved harder and harder for her to obtain. She came across the HELP WANTED sign for Emeralds as she was walking to an audition. Rather than go to the audition, she stepped inside, and the rest became history.

HEADCANNONS:

very sportsy, artsy, and active. she loves most sports, except golf. she’s just never really had anyone explain golf to her so it kinda slipped through the cracks for her.

animal lover. if you left it up to her the woman would adopt every stray dog and cat she saw in the streets!

she is the kind of person who loves to cook for people. chances are, if you’re her friend, related to her, or close to her in any way, she has probably cooked for you. she also sometimes volunteers and makes food for those who are low on their luck. it’s really just in her nature to be giving.

huge horror movie fanatic as well. all them old horror movies like friday the 13th, nightmare on elm street, halloween, rosemary’s baby, etc are right up her alley. she would rather have a spooky movie night than a romcom night, but she also does enjoy a nice romcom with her gal pals.

she is also a huge stoner. she'll partake in other drugs too, especially if it is requested by a client at work, but she mainly sticks to smoking. and wine.

she dreams of becoming an actress. one day.

PLOTS/CONNECTIONS:

COMING SOON

[lovesung127]

Golden Age album review

Baggy Jeans-okay first of all the mv is absolutely wild. im like gagged. my jaw was dropped the whole time. probably screamed more times than i'd like to admit. THEY ALL LOOK SO HOT OMGOMGGMOGOGMSAJSDHAIDAJVI. the little insta photo with ten in 7thsense AHHHH. couldn't stop giggling at the bridge part with doyoung. the song itself is so catchy. LOVE LOVE LOVE jaehyun and doyoung's vocals in this song they ate it up. also when mark goes "yea boy" it ignites something in me. the bridge is so good and mark taeyong and ten ateeee. ALSO THE CHOREO IS SOO GOOD I LOVE ITT ESP THE END CHORUS

Call D- okay the intro is cute i love the like game boi sound. ALSO TAEYONGS VOCALS WHAT AHOVDKDKO okayy the chorus is so cute and upbeat i love. reminds me of some krnb song but i can't remember which one. kinda love the outro

PADO- okayy introoo. love taeyong's opening verse and johnny's too! eat it up hendery! XIAOJUNS VOCALS?!?! love haechans part! jaehyun's voice fits this so well. and i love mark's raps! OMFGG THE CHORUS AHASHSJHDSIHVUKV I LOVE IT AHAHHHHSDHHDHFHDVHV bridge is eating. love the whistling too

Interlude: Oasis- omfg is the chenle in the intro bc omg his voice is so heavenly. I LOVE JAEHYUNS WHISPER RAP THING! AND OMFG YUTAA! AND WINWIN AND JAEMINS RAP OKAYY! THIS IS SUCH A NICE COMBO OF RAPPERS OMGOMGOMGM THE CHORUS IS SO CATCHYY AND CVNTY

The BAT- wait i love the intro sounds so dream like. omg jungwooo HSHDSKSDKFDJ omg whoever is syaing "my bat" or something like that in the whisper voice OMFG? JENO AND JISUNG FAST RAPPING GAGGED ME TO MY CORE. WHOEVER THAT WAS ATE. OMFGG THE BRIDGEE AHJOFSJOF THE HIGH NOTES. this is so good. and yuta's vocals ate as he always those. im like dancing in my seat omfg. that was so good

Alley Oop- YUH OKAY! omg yangyang ateeeeee! and jaemin. YEEEE JISUNG OKAYYYYY! YAS JENO! WAIT WHOS DEEP VOICE SINGING IS THAT BC OMGGGG! i love this song its so like football stadium coded. yuta is slaying the vocals. okay slay winwin and hendery! IS THAT JISUNG SINGING?? major ass shaker. THE BRIDGE IS SO HEAVENLY OMG I LOVE IS THAT JISUNG SINGING AHAHAHAHHAHAHH I LOVE IT. i love the whole songs build up. okay adlibbbsss

That's Not Fair- YUHHH TAEYONGGGG! okay jeno and johnny. STOP I LOVE THE SINGING PART OKAY LIKE MARK LEADING AHSDFJFJKJ. like very musical marching! loved tens vocals. YESSSS YANGYANG IS SINGING! i love marks second rap. OMG THE WHISPER RAPPING PART. the melody sounds so familiar but i can't figure it out. i love the low voices

Kangaroo- the intro is cute like show choir vibes IS THAT TAEIL OPENING BC SLAY! STOP I LOVE WHEN YANGYANG AND JISUNG SING. this is such a cute and summer song! love chenles vocals and kun and renjun serveeed! this song is very beach vibes like im imagining sitting on a beach chair and waves are going in and out

Not Your Fault- oooo love the piano intro. YASSS RENJUN. Taeil's voice sound so nice omgggg. doyoung's voice fits this genre so well. ahhh the adlibs sound so good!!! jungwoo's voice sounds so sweet and heavenly and xiaojun's voice sounds so heavenly. the vocal unit atteeee

Golden Age- the switch up from doyoung's vocals to marks rap took me out. i was baffled. but yangyang's rap!!! WINWIN HAS LINES! I LOVE XIAOJUNS VOICE AHHHH!!! the bridge slayed. the mv was also so cool. this song is so coming of age movie ending coded. they all ate!

okay this whole album slayyed! like the members they did for each song all fit each other so well its wild. also their voices all sound so good together AHHH. my favorites are probs baggy jeans, pado, the bat, alley oop, and interlude:oasis is really good too! GO STREAM BAGGY JEANS AND THIS ALBUMMM!

[sheyffer]

Today marks the first anniversary of my Detentionaire fic Let the Future Tell the Truth, following Finnwich's life from the very beginnings of MWF to a hypothetical season five - at a final (almost) 130k words, it explores the backstories of everyone caught up in this conspiracy and discusses a lot of questions the show never got to answer, so if that sounds like something up your alley, definitely check it out!

To celebrate, I thought I'd share some songs that have accompanied me while writing the fic, songs that really fit the characters or certain points in the story (and always hit me in the feels because of it). Spoilers ahead!

Ghosts in the Water (Arrows to Athens)

There's no room for martyrs There's not any time for us to doubt But the grey makes it harder Burning to see but we won't close our eyes now 'Cause this is a fight to break the silence These are the lies we've made To try to hold ourselves up now The pull of the tide is always quiet But this is a fight to take one more breath before we drown

To start this off, have one of many songs that are just wonderful MWF vibes in general :')

Ship in Port (Radical Face)

You said the ship in port is the safer one But it's not the reason it was made So forgive me if I wander off And forgive me more if I just stay

Going somewhat chronologically, here's song one of two that always hit me in the feels for Maxwell and Lo, for their beautiful confrontation in chapter four.

Frozen Pines (Lord Huron)

I am ready to follow you even though I don't know where I will wait in the night until you decide to take me there 'Cause I know I don't wanna stay here forever, it's time to be moving on I don't wanna be the only one living when all of my friends are gone

And song two of two! This one's for when Maxwell sets out to find Lo again.

Secret of Life (Lord Huron)

What you crossed was a line at the edge of the void And you can't crawl back without making a choice But then something escaped when you opened the gate You cheated death and sealed your fate

Speaking of Lord Huron, have one of the absolute best songs for MWFP overall :')

Promiseland (Mika)

One person's lie is just another man's truth We kept on running from the devil, but the devil was you Every time I see the light, I'm falling deeper in debt If I've never seen the good, how can it come to an end?

I've linked this one in the fic itself before, but yeah, it really is just one of the most perfect Kan songs out there.

Birth of Serpents (The Mountain Goats)

Crawl through the tunnel and follow, follow the light northwest See that young man who dwells inside his body like an uninvited guest See the tunnel twist, clutch your birthright in your fist Let the camera do its dirty work down there in the dark Sink low, rise high Bring back some blurry pictures to remember all your darker moments by

Title-wise and with some of the lyrics, this one obviously makes for another wonderful song for Kan, but at the same time, I really do like it for Luke. Both of them also have a bit of a connection to cameras, so it really works well with the lyrics.

False Prophecy (Abney Park)

I reached from darkness, I saw the day And now I'm awake And in my darkness I found a way To transcend my fate I took a step toward the light of day

One of my all time favorite Ištaran songs.

On the Faultline (Sonata Arctica)

Here I stand and look at my life Barren, cold, and incomplete Mirror smiles at me with a teary disdain Pointing out the faults in me Memories of holidays with you Will rain on me from time to time We have the road within ourselves To countless paradises When there is a tunnel there's a light The thought is causing tremors On the faultline between you and I

And another, this time about his relationship with Emesh (and also one of my favorite songs of all time in general).

Gossip (Måneskin)

Sip the gossip, drink 'til you choke Sip the gossip, burn down your throat You're not iconic, you are just like them all Don't act like you don't know

This one could just be Coral Grove's theme song tbh - and fun fact, I do have an abandoned PMV storyboard with it lying around :') It's also very reminiscent of the way Wendell calls out Maxwell in parts of the fic.

Privately Owned Spiral Galaxy (Crywank)

This song is super hard to quote lines from, but just know that it's perfect for Art after his diagnosis and him starting out with his cloning scheme :3

Loki (The Mechanisms)

Flashes like camera bulbs fire in my brain Is this truly me, am I going insane? In faint bloody flashes I watch people die And if that was me, then who am I? Oohhh, you can't erase me Oohhh, you can't unmake me

And this is Art realizing how messed up his clones are becoming... poor guy :')

The Loneliest (Måneskin)

'Cause I don't even care about the time I've got left here The only thing I know now is that I wanna spend it With you, with you, nobody else here Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

Alright, last Art song for now. Speaking of his complicated legacy... you already know this one, it's what heavily influenced a certain Maxwell/Art scene - good stuff.

When I Say Go (caseJackal)

I drown you out when I say so Tear down the walls when I say go I’ll holler lies, to save the show They’ll fall in line when I say go Can’t drown me out when I say so Tear down the walls when I say go All hollow lies, like every show You fall in line when I say go Run for your lives I’m already in control

Switching from Art to Fateous, here's one for the very end of the fic, and for him and his eventual plan. Fateous used to be one of my least favorite characters, but honestly, writing about him during the fic has made me appreciate him quite a bit (though he's still far from a morally decent person ofc).

One Last Song (Lord of the Lost)

If I could sing one last song before the world ends If I could sing one last song to say goodbye If I could sing one last song to all my children If I could sing one last song before we die If I could sing one last song to my parents If I could sing one last song with all my friends If I could sing one last song to everyone I've hurt And beg their forgiveness before this life ends I'd give everything I have, say all the things I left unsaid If I could sing one last song, I'll make it a good one

Starting off the heartbreaking Maxwell songs, have this absolute gem (especially the acoustic version I linked). Messes me up every time :')

Still Feel It (caseJackal)

So is it right to be so sure we've Already seen the worst? Should we try to act so worthy Of this thing we never got to work? Are we cursed, do we deserve it? Not just those of us who never learned? It's not the end of the world If we're still here to feel it hurt

Heartbreaking Maxwell song #2. If I had to pick one song to be the theme song for the entire fic, this would be it - everything about it just fits perfectly, from the lyrics to the music itself that sounds like him playing it on his organ at Coral Grove. Although there is one more song that really captures the essence of the story, and that's the one I'll end on:

Stellarcide (caseJackal)

(No matter) if our planets align (No matter) if we die or survive this (No matter) when our stars collide You still light me up like stellarcide When you and I mix

There's hardly a better song to describe the beautifully complex relationship Maxwell and Ištaran have :') It's definitely one of my favorite things I got to explore over the course of the fic.

Bonus: Some fun songs from other tv shows

Tez Says (Victor & Valentino)

Now heed my words, listen to my diction The truth is often stranger than fiction You can't trust them and they don't trust you But believe in me 'cause I believe in you More than a smoking mirror I make the real feel realer I speak and it manifests 'Cause I'm simply the best

One thing Tez has over Finnwich is his very own official song... love this guy, as short as his appearance in the fic was.

Nothing Left to Lose (Tangled: The Series)

Yes, it's true, my path is dark, but I see where it ends My rivals will fall as my power ascends Despise me, that's fine I'm taking what's mine even so Not like you You lost your nerve, you lost the game But you and I, we're not the same I'm not lost, this fate was mine to choose So I chose to lose my doubts and lose my chains Lose each weakness that remains Now that I have nothing left to lose

This scene was a massive influence for the Kan/Maxwell conversation in the later parts of the fic, although I had known that one would happen long before this song came out. Makes it all the more exciting!

And finally, here's a song for @pewcat2 in particular, I know how much you like the character this is (tangentially) about :3

To everyone who's read all of this, thanks for all your support with the fic! I hope you enjoyed this little journey into some of the stuff that inspired it, although this really is just a bit of a best of. I have plenty more songs I associate with the fic and Detentionaire overall, but this post is long enough already :') Either way, see you at the next fic!

[chiakinanami82]

Nerdy Prudes Must Die songs ranking

I was inspired by the recent ranking videos on YouTube, plus I’ve been listening to the music ever since the pro shot released, so yeah. As usual, these are just my opinions, so if you disagree, well, just be civil. Now, let’s go!

15. Dirty Dudes Must Die- This one is simply a spin of Nerdy Prudes Must Die, and Angela’s voice sounds off. It’s a fun way to end the musical though. 14. The Best of You- It sounds way too much like a stereotypical pop song. I know that’s the point since it’s playing at their homecoming dance, but still.

13. Go Go NightHawks!- The beginning is good, but the cheer really got on my nerves.

12. Nerdy Prudes Must Die- I love this song, and Will absolutely kills it as Max. However, the chorus of “Nerdy Prudes Must Die” didn’t quite click for me.

11. Dirty Girl- This song was a pain to get through when I originally watched the show. I literally had to stop for a day, and even then it was difficult. However, I’ve gotten used to it, and I love Grace so much as a character. 10. Bully the Bully- It’s cute, the choreography is fun, but it’s not as good as the twisted version.

9. Cool As I Think I Am (Reprise)- This is a reprise. It’s a good reprise, but still.

8. Hatchet Town- The callbacks are awesome, it’s well-performed, but I don’t see myself playing it on its own like I do with Feast or Famine.

7. Just For Once- Usually, this song is generally placed lower on most people’s rankings, but I’m a massive Falsettos and Sondheim fan, so this song is right up my alley.

6. If I Loved You- The harmonies are so good, and I love Pete and Steph.

5. Cool As I Think I Am- Again, Pete is a wonderful character, and I love the lyrics.

4. Bury the Bully- Yeah, betcha you didn’t expect this little song to be this high up. It’s catchy, fun, and dark, which I think works better than the original.

3. Literal Monster- God, this one is so good. I love the nerds, and this is a wonderful establishment of Max and his reign of terror. 2. The Summoning- The Lords in Black are fun, terrifying creatures that add a ton. Also, I love the callbacks to other stuff, like Pokey asking Steph what she wants and Tinky mentioning how he’ll have the whole set of Spankoffskis in his toy box. Also, the song itself is both childish and chaotic, adding to the insanity of the Lords.

High School Is Killing Me- I hated high school, so I can definitely relate to this song. Plus, I love the choreography, the lyrics, and the music. It’s the perfect opening song.

This is definitely the best Hatchetfield musical. It balances comedy, horror, and drama perfectly.

[madame-fouquet]

2022 Anime Retrospective

With the year having come and gone, and a whirlwind of, frankly incredible, anime with it, it's time to do what has become a tradition for me and present my annual end of the year anime round-up! Each year it feels like I talk about just how hard it was to narrow the field as if it is something unique to that year's batch of anime, but perhaps it's time to admit that every year has a ton of great stuff that make it difficult to pick just a few to represent the best of them.

That said there were still a couple factors that made this year uniquely difficult, mainly the threat of a sweep by one particular series. However I am nothing if not fair, so I imposed a rule that I wouldn't let any series occupy more than two spots. I WILL however be doing a special mini-shout-out at the end of each category to that one particular series. That out of the way I do want to also open with a quick shout-out to some entries that didn't quite make the cut. My Dress Up Darling was a positively incredible series with an equally incredible main couple who were impossible to not root for, Marin herself being an especially lovable goober who had me constantly “Squeee”-ing along with her. Chainsaw Man was also a GREAT late-year entry that I feel is gonna really get a chance to shine in later seasons/coeurs so I'm gonna let it wait til then for me to really gush. Eve from Birdie Wing, Marin from Dress Up Darling, Chainsaw Man's Power, and Do It Yourself's own Jobko-chan are all wonderful and delightful ladies, but couldn't quite measure up to the character who did come away with this year's accolade. I do still absolutely love all of them though. And One Piece Film Red's Backlight encapsulates both an absolute banger of a song as well as a potent and emotional moment in the movie, but there were reasons it couldn't be on the list for either of those categories. That will not, however, stop me from listening to it on repeat.

Best of the Year: Call of the Night

“Take me away midnight, Bloodshot red eyes, A lullaby for grown-ups.”* The unprecedented power of the temptation offered by a street lit, not by the sun, but by the harsh burning glow of neon signs and muted business windows. The freedom you find wrapping itself around you just as the gloomy shadows of murky alleys close in on either side. The endless possibilities of the deep, dark, and beautiful night.

Crazy how something like an anime can encapsulate such profound and abstract concepts, how it can make me long for those quiet and intimate walks to a 7-11 at midnight, the way it felt like the whole town was just for me and a single other person. But conveying those feelings of nostalgia for distant memories of the romantic and unknown is clearly EXACTLY what Call of the Night was setting out to do, and the fact that it was able to so perfectly do just that is exactly why it is my best show of the year.

Call of the Night is more than just a vehicle for exquisitely communicated vibes though. It's also the story of Ko-kun and Nazuna finding each other, and trying to find meaning in their lives through that connection. Of Ko trying to come to terms with who he is, and what connecting with other people actually means. Of Nazuna trying to shake off the deep malaise that has haunted the long nights of her unnaturally long life. It is a story of people finding themselves through each other and through the freedom offered only by the mystery of the night.

Along with the harsh feelings of entropy and malaise Call of the Night also understands how to perfectly communicate things like fear, intimacy, joy, and raw sex appeal. Every other series that makes an attempt at being erotic ends up feeling sophomoric and lazy next to the subtle, classy, and perfectly potent showings from Call of the Night.

I would love to keep going on about Call of the Night, and I will! But not here. This series threatened to sweep nearly every category this year and, though I denied it that privilege, I will give the show its due and note, as an honorable mention, each thing it would have contributed to those categories. If that isn't the ultimate endorsement of a single series, I don't know what is. “Flooded with don't-do's, Smeared with shouldn't know's. Under the screen of darkness coming to get us, You're always so capricious, The Call of the Night.”* *Yofukashi no Uta by Creepy Nuts

Runner-Up: Made in Abyss Golden City of the Scorching Sun

***This is one of the first times I feel like I need to tag one of my entries with a SPOILER warning. So if you haven't watched the latest MiA season and have plans to, maybe consider skipping over this entry. Just know that I highly recommend it!*** With all the romanticism out of the way it's time to get heavy. Made in Abyss can be a very divisive series, and for good reasons, but it qualifies as a “problematic fave” for me. I'm not here to get into the weeds about the series though, what I am here to do it talk about what a fantastic follow-up this second season is to the initial outing as well as the movie.

For me, Made in Abyss was always about three things: The unrelenting power of the human spirit, the awe-inspiring beauty of the bizarre and dangerous, and the strength to retain one's identity and principles in the face of overwhelming horror that dares you to lose your way. Golden City of the Scorching Sun follows up on all of these themes perfectly, willing to pursue just how far the human spirit can be pushed while still refusing to break.

The new characters are also extremely good fits for the continuation of those thematic explorations, with new-comer Faputa having an arc that ties wonderfully into Reg's own continued growth while still also focusing on the question posed by her own existence: Even if you are in the right to seek revenge and enact abhorrent acts in its name, is it still morally just to do so? (if you were to ask me the answer is: yes.)

The new villain of Wazukyan also does a fantastic job of following up on past antagonists by continuing to show how easy it is for raw confidence and unstoppable ambition, like that exhibited by spunky protagonist Riko, to spiral into self-serving cruelty and arrogance. The road to hell is paved with good intentions, and the Abyss is allegory enough for the awful afterlife that I think the original exhibition leader's intentions qualify as a guiding beacon into the dark. And while a lot of parallels can be draw between Wazukyan and series supervillain bad-dad Bondrewd, I think Wazukyan's approach and mindset are different enough from the “Father of the Year” that he stands well on his own. Overall this entry was exactly what it needed to be, different enough to stand apart from it predecessors, but still fully acting on that mission statement that we started the exhibition on. And it has me just that much more excited to continue down into the Abyss and see what beautiful horrors are waiting for our heroes when they finally reach the bottom.

Runner-Up-Up: Kaguya-sama Love is War -Ultra Romantic-

Any season that has Kaguya-sama means that every other show is competing for a best of slot with Kaguya-sama. Any year that has Kaguya-sama is a year where every other show is competing for a best of slot with Kaguya-sama. This show is like the new gold standard for both rom-coms and absurdist high school comedies, and the third season shows that it absolutely refuses to slow down when it comes to “pause the show and take a minute to finish laughing” comedy, as well as absolute gut-punching emotional peaks.

I lauded the second season for achieving the previously thought to be impossible task of making me actually care about and feel bad for Ishigami, a feat which this season follows up on by continuing to feature him as a... surprisingly good guy? Yeah it's wild. It also made me form an emotional connection with Ino, despite her rather off-putting personality. Honestly Kaguya-sama really is just “the show that makes you see the good in a bunch of stupid kids.” (Gosh they're all so dumb.)

What also helped this season, I think, was giving some more screen-time and substantial growth to the long-suffering ultimate wingman who is Hayasaka. Hayasaka has spent so much time in Kaguya's shadow, having to expend so much time and energy managing her mistress's emotions that, both personally and narratively, she's had ZERO time to experience growth and handle her own problems. But now it's her turn to shine in the spotlight and express all that pent up frustration in the most normal and natural way anyone could- with a rap-battle. She deserves everything they finally give her honestly, especially considering this season also saw her being forced to confront one of the most brutal ordeals any character in the series could ever suffer... being locked in a small room while Shirogane sings. Heaven have mercy.

The absurdity of it all and the stupidity of the characters is 100% why we're here. Well, that and the fluffy fuwa-fuwa doki-doki emotions we experience from watching Kaguya and Shirogane FINALLY make some of the most substantial progress in their relationship yet. The finale of the season is a “needs to be seen to be understood” sort of thing, and has me absolutely chomping at the bit for that cinematic follow-up.

Runner-Up-Up: Birdie Wing -Golf Girls' Story-

“Golf requires goofy pants and a fat ass.” -Happy Gilmore 1996

While many of the outfits in this series are quite goofy, and a number of the asses are definitely fat, I like to think that Birdie Wing has shown that golf needs just a little bit more than that. According to Birdie Wing, golf also requires Mafia connections, amnesia, a shady underground golf teacher, the hypnotizing powers of pussy-stank, a wlw bent, and Gundam references aplenty.

Seriously though, Birdie Wing has no right making me enjoy watching, and being engaged as heavily with the sport of golf as it did. I'm not a sports show girl, it takes a rare and special series to make me tune in for the scores and drama and, well... Birdie Wing is definitely both rare and SPECIAL. Anime is the only medium that could give us mob-backed underground life-or-death golfing and get me to type that sentence with a straight face.

If Birdie Wing was JUST empty spectacle it would still probably be a pretty good time. But it somehow manages to squeeze very real character work and emotional drama in between the physics-bending drives and mob violence. The incredibly sweet and genuine budding relationship and emotions between leads Eve and Aoi is the actual driving force behind the series, even if it's easy to occasionally lose track of it behind all the VR and mechanically randomized underground golf courses.

I find myself just kinda going in circles trying to talk about this show, unable to describe it any other way than wonderfully absurd and beautiful. Birdie Wing kicks in the door to the sports-anime-bar to a perfectly timed record scratch as the other series full of spunky, hopeful, and wide-eyed high schoolers stare in disbelief at the explosive assassination of a political leader the series features as a slight aside. It takes one look around the room and dares anyone to ask what ridiculous heights it's going to get up to next. And I am so ready to see what those heights are.

Runner-Up-Up: Sasaki and Miyano

Standing in stark contrast to that last entry is something rooted more deeply in reality and subtlety. Sasaki and Miyano is such a powerfully sugar sweet romance that I feel like even the most bitter among us can find themselves drawn into the budding feelings between the leads. Along with being an exceptional example of the classic fluffy romantic comedy, Sasaki and Miyano also proves you can have your pining, and actual advancement of the relationship too.

It's one thing to have characters in a series who are genre-savvy, aware of the tropes of the story they exist in and able to note when they're happening, but it's another thing I think to have a lead who is savvy of the genre he's in (in this case Boys Love) and also in complete denial of it happening. Miyano loves to love Boys Love, but dang is the boy is in such deep denial about what that means for his own romance. I think one of the strengths of our uke-adjacent lead is that, while he spends part of the series in denial about his sexual preferences, it never comes off as paradoxically homophobic or anything. Instead we just get a young guy who had never thought to consider that liking other dudes was an option for HIM specifically, and I feel like that is a pretty relatable feeling.

I'll admit that I was worried going into this series that it was going to be yet another single coeur MLM/WLW series that spent the entire time on setting up the central relationship without ever reaching the payoff, (a trend I've been seeing a bit more often than I'd like lately.) I was then incredibly pleasantly surprised when the series ends with an actual substantial step in the advancement of the central relationship. It sounds minor, but when it comes to romance, I'm not just here for pining and longing looks- I wanna see some actual payoff dammit!

Sasaki and Miyano was never the most lavish production, but it certainly did know how to spend it's budget smartly. Things never looked awkward, or off model, and even if they weren't an incredibly extravagant effect, the colored shapes that would float by during the particularly soft moments never failed to make me melt and feel the gentleness and emotions of the moments. And I think that's the best way I could describe this show's strengths. It always made me feel the softness, the tenderness, and the love infused into it, and that sounds like the most you could ask of a romantic series.

Honorable Mention: I'm Kodama Kawashiri

I love short form series. I still consider Working Buddies to be one of my favorite anime of the past decade. The format, it seems, is ironically often allotted more freedom than its full length brethren. The amount of creativity that has to be utilized to tell a story, move a character forward, or make a point in three to five minutes can be startling. But that this series just uses that time to be painfully relatable is possibly even more impressive.

For a series that is sixty-six percent opening by volume it is astounding how much they got me to care about the titular character of Kawashiri. Maybe it's because I too am constantly procrastinating on any given project I'm currently working on, or wish I could just eat fried foods and drink beer for every meal, or have also made attempts to game the sleep system that have all ended in abject failure. I'm not sure, but I do know I would die for this pitiful little kappa woman.

And maybe that's the magic of Kodama Kawashiri. She doesn't need to strive for something profound, or accomplish amazing feats, or dig into the deep levels of the human condition and examine what it truly means to be a person for us to love her and enjoy our time with her. She just needs to remind us that, it's okay to occasionally have a mini-mart dinner or linger in the bath knowing full well there are things we need to be actually accomplishing. That deadline can totally wait, and there's no way this will come back to bite us in any way. We're all human, we're all flawed. We should all take time to slow down and let ourselves be just a little slothful sometimes. You should be kinder to yourself. I should be kinder to myself. I'm Kodama Kawashiri. And You are too.

Best Character of the Year: Riko (Made in Abyss Golden City of the Scorching Sun)

***This is one of the first times I feel like I need to tag one of my entries with a SPOILER warning. So if you haven't watched the latest MiA season and have plans to, maybe consider skipping over this entry. Just know that I highly recommend it!***

It feels a little odd giving this award to a character who made her premiere in animated form several years ago but, while Riko in the first season and movie was fantastic, I find that this season was the one where her character really materialized and compelled me. As good as she was in that first coeur, she did unfortunately spend most of its incredible final act sidelined and unconscious, so it was difficult to fully appreciate her impact. Similarly the movie felt like more of Nanachi and Prushka's story than Riko's, again making her feel like a supporting character in the story she is technically the protagonist of.

One thing that really stood out to me as Riko progressed through this latest season was how easy it would be to take her optimism and positivity for granted. Riko has seen, done, and been involved with horrors both natural and man-made beyond comprehension, but she has been left in a situation where she isn't allowed time to deal with and internalize any of it. She is being forced, constantly, to push it down and forge ahead, because to lose to her traumas and emotions now means death. So to see her allowing herself to blanket that trauma in her genuine love and fascination for the Abyss can really come across as one of the most heroic things she's done, at least for herself. She knows that she will have to confront these things some day, but she also understands that now is just unfortunately not that time.

Riko's empathy, despite the depths of human cruelty she's had to face, is perhaps the most important thing she contributes to the tenacious trio that is her, Reg, and Nanachi, and it is on full display in this season. The way she frees Vueko without a thought, the way she can answer Wazukyan's final question with her characteristic sense of wonder, the fact that she was able to forgive Maa and by extension get ME to forgive Maa. She is constantly showing that, despite the growing and impossibly heavy burden on it, she still has a heart, and that might be the one thing keeping her from becoming like so many of the other people she has encountered on her journey, and the thing that defines and separates her from the other White Whistles.

Honorable Mention: As I mentioned before, Call of the Night ran the risk of sweeping this whole year. So my CotN character shout-out goes to Seri Kikiyou: The far too relatable ennui-afflicted vampire gyaru.

Best Moment of the Year: Rose's Arm (Birdie Wing -Golf Girls' Story-)

Were there more emotionally affecting and deeper reaching moments in anime this year? Oh, absolutely. Are there any real ramifications or far reaching consequences from this event? Not really. But when I tell you that not a single other moment this year got the kind of genuine audible reaction that  came out of me when Rose's futuristic robot arm prosthetic exploded out from beneath her glove, I am being absolutely serious.

Birdie Wing had me thinking I was fully prepared for it, that I knew exactly what level it was operating on and that, while it may be able to impress me with the depths of excess and ridiculousness that it could reach, I didn't think it would have the ability to fully surprise me. And then, despite my acceptance of the mechanical modular underground golf course they were playing on, I was NOT actually ready for the reveal that Rose had a gosh-danged ROBOT ARM. And the way this information is presented to us, with it exploding off her body after making a drive? I just couldn't. I screamed. I cried. I died laughing. I said “No” repeatedly, I asked “Why?” just as often, and I had to pause and catch my breath. No one else is out here doing it like Birdie Wing, I still have trouble believing this moment actually happened on screen like that in a series about GOLF!

The fact that such a short moment could produce so many emotions and at such intensity means that I couldn't give this award to anything else. Please, if you haven't, watch Birdie Wing. This show is the completely fake real anime that anime deserves and I love its absurdity with all my heart.

Honorable Mention: I almost gave this award to Call of Night's first episode when Nazuna and Ko take flight at the end. The insert song kicking in, the ethereal lighted sky that is almost synonymous with the series, the lingering beginnings of a budding romance, absolutely incredible visual storytelling.

Best Theme Song of the Year: Chitty Chitty Bang Bang by Queendom (Ya Boy Kongming)

I was unsure about Ya Boy Kongming when the spring season first started up. Just reading the synopsis I didn't know if the series could actually execute such a unique concept. Before I could make a decision though, my partner rushed over to me with a video he'd found on social media and together we watched the OP for the series with all of its incredible imagery and energy as this monstrous ear worm of a song belted out alongside it. After watching that, there was no more need for waffling. I knew we were going to watch the show.

That alone should speak to the strength of the OP. The point of an opening number is to get you in the mood and headspace for the piece of media you're about to enjoy, but in this case it was the single most convincing advertisement that could have possibly been made for the series. The raw “getting hyped in the club” vibes of the song, the positively excellent energy of watching the cast dancing along or engaging in hilarious music video style shows of excess, it makes it impossible to not have a good time while it's playing. And I think Eiko herself would approve considering that all she wants to do is spread happiness to the world through music.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gNn9NxZH2Vo Honorable Mention: All three Creepy Nuts tracks from Call of the Night have not left my mind (or playlist) since the show ended. I'd be hard-pressed to pick only one of the three as a favorite, but considering their own Yofukashi no Uta was the inspiration for the series itself, it feels fair to give it to that one especially. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zArhnXbh3Yc https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OndK9RknCYU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6WjVGEVbNc

Best Movie of the Year: One Piece Film Red

So here's a fun story: A buddy of mine hit me up asking if I'd be interested in going to see One Piece Film Red in theaters with him. He'd gotten a pair of tickets but his friend he was going to go with had to drop at the last minute. I told him I'd be happy to go, but I asked, since I'd only ever read maybe a couple dozen chapters of One Piece and picked up some other bits of info through cultural osmosis, if he'd be okay with me occasionally leaning over and asking who someone was or if I was supposed to know something from the series or not. He then confessed that he knew even LESS than that about One Piece and had primarily gotten the tickets because the buddy who had dropped was a huge fan.

I think that is able to speak more to the strength of the movie than anything else. If you at least know the basics of how the world of One Piece works and who the Strawhat Pirates are, you are going to be able to enjoy this movie I can assure you, because I absolutely did. And I didn't just enjoy it, I fell in love with it. More-so than anything else, this film has gotten me the closest to finally going back and tackling the insurmountable task that is “catching up on One Piece.”

I'm a fan of musicals, and especially love when an anime is a musical (Go watch Starmyu) but after Uta's bombastic performance of “New Genesis” I had just assumed it was a clever diegetic opening number. But when she started singing again during the lighthearted battle with the various pirates during “I'm Invincible” my attention was once more piqued. And when she unleashed the absolute banger that is “Backlight” during that heartbreaking confrontation, I knew this was something very special.

And perhaps, fittingly, Uta is that special something that made the movie so great. The combined performances of Kaori Nazuka (speaking) and Ado (singing) help bring to life a character who is so much more compelling and deep than I was prepared to give her credit for going in. This movie is just as much, if not more, her story than that of the Strawhat Pirates whose series it occupies. From what little One Piece I had engaged with I was already quite taken with Shanks, but his daughter has proven to be a character who I hold even more near and dear to my heart.

If you're a One Piece faithful, you've probably already seen this movie. If you're a One Piece casual who has been waffling on it, do yourself a favor and see it now. And if you're a One Piece Newbie or just someone who has heard a lot but never taken the leap, this is your ship coming in, and it's time you climbed aboard.

Worst of the Year: The Yakuza's Guide to Babysitting

***Disclaimer: I only vote a series “worst of the year” that I have watched all or the majority of. I will not vote for something that I tried for one or two episodes and dropped due to not liking it, so this often ends up as more of a “least favorite” or “most disappointing” category. I also will NOT vote for something with an infamous reputation. I know by word of mouth of some truly ABYSMAL shows, but I didn't watch them, so it's not fair for me to give them that flack (No matter how well deserved).***

With the now usual disclaimer out of the way let's dig into the crimes committed by this series and the manner in which it has disgraced the family name. Don't misunderstand my thematic hyperbole, Yakuza Babysitter is by no means an abhorrent show, but it is a series that seems to have somehow misunderstood its own core concept and the potential contained within.

Lots of people, myself included, love the comical juxtaposition of something like members of  organized crime syndicates and mundane heartwarming activities, just look at the explosive popularity of the Yakuza game series. However when you do something like this you need to nail down what the very specific tone or tones you're going to be working with are and present them fully and succinctly from the beginning. Which is not something YGtB ever really did? The beginning of the first episode implies that we're going to be primarily in for the cross-section of Toru's violent, unhinged personality and the sweet and innocent activity of caring for a young child. But we rarely ever see Toru enact that much violence, and when we do it's always for the sake of others, or in the name of righting wrongs. We never really actually SEE much that reinforces what we're constantly told, that Toru is an madman on the edge, only barely contained by the family head's strength of will.

And that's where the series mostly drops the ball. We're constantly being told things, but never shown the evidence of their truth. There's this mysterious and threatening individual who pops up at the end of several episodes to attempt to spread a foreboding cloud over the future, but the rest of the series never commits to this concept (at least not up til the eighth or ninth episode when I finally gave up.) Though frankly I wouldn't blame anyone for dropping during the absolutely awful time of a head-scratcher that was the fourth episode. Here's a writing tip: Just because you've cleared the three episode test, if you haven't fully nailed down your core vibes and concepts, or even introduced all the members of your primary cast, it might not be a good idea to air an episode that you admit UP FRONT is completely non-canon and is just wasting the viewers time.

[sapphonoticeme]

for kpop ask game: 1 2 and 6

this turned out to be a long and pretty personal answer so keep reading at your own risk

1. How did you first get into K-Pop?

this is actually interesting!! :D because the first time i got interested in kpop was back in 2016 (i remember because bts's 'blood sweat and tears' just came out). i just kept hearing about it and one day decided to check it out, which in my case meant watching like four bts's MVs (because they were the only band i had any idea about) and deciding that kpop is really fun and i want to get into it. but i ultimately failed to - i just couldn't understand how any of this worked and i had no idea how to discover new bands to fall in love with other than type 'kpop girl groups' into google (which i did and watched red velvet's 'rookie' as a result; i really didn't enjoy that MV and that significantly lowered my spirits (which might've not been the case if i knew that kpop groups often change their concept and sound from comeback to comeback; but i didn't even know what a comeback was)). i did somehow find a group i liked (and i even vividly remember one of their MVs but i can't remember their name to save my life so i might never rediscover them) but sadly the fact that i didn't understand how the hell this whole kpop thing worked really got to me back then and i ended up losing interest because it was just too difficult to enjoy (and me not understanding english at the time didn't help).

this time around howeverrrrr i'm much less of a control freak and more patient and much better at research, so i feel pretty comfortable!! what sparked the interest this time was me befriending a girl who turned out to be a blink and at some point i just asked her for some kpop recommendations out of curiosity. and the thing is, i never Actually lost interest, it just kinda went dormant - i tended to instantly like people more if i learned they liked kpop, i liked seeing kpop stans pfps on social media, i was excited for bts to become POPULAR popular in the west, and i even went in the reply sections of very popular tweets to watch random fancams on purpose just because i really enjoyed this type of content (mainly because i love choreography). but the point of no-return was when one of my new friend's recommendations turned out to be i-dle's 'hann' and i fell in love. with the sound, then with the visuals (when i watched the MV after just listening to it), then with the lyrics (when i watched again with the subtitles). they just had everything. and from then on i had no choice but to become a full kpop stan

2. Who is your ultimate bias, and why do you love them?

probably soyeon? i think if i had one chance in my life to do a fansign with an idol, i would choose her. she just has such a way of creating music and concepts and stories that seem very personal but also strongly resonate with me and i am so grateful for them. i really needed her in my life

it also just seems to me that she really tries to be a good person and has this as a priority. she's a notoriously strict producer but she always tries her best to not actually hurt anyone. which doesn't sound that impressive but i really think her approach to this says a lot about her because she's very passionate and precise about her job and it's very easy to choose to sacrifice others' comfort when you're given the power to do so

i just think she's a genius and a good human being and she brings me so much joy

6. What's your favorite K-Pop music video, and why?

i have many music videos i have feelings for but this has to be i-dle's 'oh my god'. it's just so hard to do better than this one

i absolutely read the song itself as being about queer love because that what makes the most sense for me (and you have to do quite a bit of mental gymnastics to Not read it like that in my opinion) and while the MV is less explicit in that way, it's still Quite Gay

and the horror-ish, religion-esque aesthetics of it are so up my alley. and it's just so beautiful in general

and This minnie

and This soojin

i just love everything about it

[braintapes]

21, 30, 7 hehe

21. Art styles nothing like your own but you like anyways

Art styles that rely heavily on linework, or a solid ink kinda style, are SUPER cool. My usual style is 'glob of colors exploded haphazardly onto the canvas' so anything involving a lot of tiny detail ESPECIALLY with the lines makes me go heart eyes. I also really enjoy cartoony, exaggerated styles. I love love love super stylized facial expressions, they're SO fun.

Some examples of artists/artwork I really like and am inspired from:

Niccillustrates has a beautiful style that features solid, largely unshaded colors and gorgeous linework/inking, which is most obvious in their Undertale fan art. Seems like they've taken down a lot of their older stuff which is a shame, this piece is one of my absolute all time favorite inspirations of mine. The little lines in everything, especially the flowers...AGH!!! Here's a more recent work! The contrast is gorgeous and I adore the shapes in this so much.

Retroautomaton's art has this overall pleasantness and smoothness to it that makes me feel like I'm drinking a milkshake, but like in visual form. Here's a few pieces I especially like. The fluidity and sense of movement in the lines/figures along with the bright, poppy colors is just!!! so lovely!!!!

ArtsyDudeJude's pieces are so EXPRESSIVE!!! The way he really pushes facial expressions in particular is super inspiring - all his original character design stuff in general is tbh. I look at linework like his and go. man I couldn't do that but it looks SO GOOD. Here's some of my favorites!

Last one I swear but I wanna mention my pal Dana, RedEyesRetroDragon on here! The way she stylizes characters is SO fun and dynamic I love it a lot. I don't know barely a thing about ygo BUT I care these guys bc of Dana's art. PLUS her inking!!!! Holy woah! LOOK AT THIS PIECE!!! AND THIS ONE!!

30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated?

Hmm this is hard! Usually when I get reception on my art it's really kind and lovely and when I don't, I generally chalk it up to people just not being online/not seeing it at that time so I don't worry too much about it.

I suppose...since I draw a lot of fanart, it's easier for my original stuff to sort of slip by the wayside. So I'll use this one as an opportunity to gush a bit about this piece I did a little while ago!

People have left some really kind and sweet comments on it so I can't say it's underrated but it is my favorite original piece I've ever done. I felt clever about the caption because you can see it a few different ways - maybe 'taking form' refers to the canvas, reaching out and taking over the person. Or maybe the person is reaching IN, merging with the painting. Maybe the painting isn't taking form as in stealing, but taking form as in manifesting itself a human body. The possibilities are endless! Also I like the silly goofy expression here <3

OH AND WHILE I'M HERE. This piece is also not underrated but this was pretty cool too.

7. A medium of art you don't work in but appreciate

SO MANY!!!!! But the first one that comes to mind is photography! Photography is so cool and fascinating and while I don't think I could ever get /super/ into it, I have a huge amount of respect and admiration for the craft! A good photograph is SOOO satisfying to look at, like it's literally the art of composition and lighting!! How cool is that??

ALSO music!!! Gah I want to make my own music so badly!!! But there's SO MANY building blocks I'm finding it kind of difficult to learn. That said I have such an appreciation for people who make songs and sounds and things!! OH AND SOUND EFFECTS. EDITING. THAT'S AN ART TOO AND I LOVE IT.

Production work in general!!! To me it's art and it's beautiful and I want to be a part of it. If I could have any job in the world no questions asked, I would want to work in stage lighting. Concerts, theatre, idc, that kinda work is right up my alley. There's just something I adore about like, all the little details that go into making a production work that most people don't think about or notice because it's designed not to be noticed, but people still worked on it!!! People still put their time and effort and craftsmanship into it! <3 <3 <3

this is about to turn into a whole essay about all the different art mediums i love efjkdshajhg Sorry this is so long but i really can gush for hours about this stuff. Thank you so SO much for sending these!!!

[wishheroes]

Weekly K-pop Round-Up (20240515-20240522) pt.1

hello everyone! today i will be reviewing kpop (etc) releases from week 3 of may which is may 15th until may 22nd. it's my first review post so i hope you can enjoy it! now let's get into the reviews.

Baby Step - We;Na

this song was so much fun! i went in with zero expectations since i have never listened to we;na before, but i really enjoyed the instrumental on this. its a fun upbeat song perfect for the summer. there's nothing extraordinary about it per se, but it's still great.

Algorhythm - ITZY

with itzy korean releases, it's usually a hit or miss with me. but their japanese releases have never disappointed me! again, this was a great japanese song from them. i think it might be one of my favourite releases from them in general. i enjoy the melody a lot, it's nice to the ear and easy to listen to while still being enjoyable and fun. i loved the little change up part near the end, it was the cherry on top!

Accendio - IVE

honestly no words. this is an amazing song. truth, i prefer heya over accendio by a lot. heya was just perfect. but this song is amazing as well. i especially loved the music video as well as the dreamy vibe the song has. the whole concept of both the song and the music video is super cool to me.

Sirius Part 2 - The Wind

correct me if im wrong, but this is a continuation of sirius, right? you can definitely hear sirius in this song and i absolutely love it! sirius was my favourite the wind song so i absolutely loved sirius part 2 as well. the wind in general have such amazing songs, they're so refreshing and they never fail to make me smile. i am so happy they're bringing back this sound in kpop! i really hope they make it big in the future.

200 - MARK

mark lee the legend you are.. im a huge rock fan so this is right up my alley. i can't tell if i prefer this or golden hour, but the song is GOOD. as in, REALLY GOOD. honestly i can't describe this song in words, it's an amazing song and it's definitely a release you shouldn't miss out on.

Orange Juice - Ryu Sujeong (ft. YEIN)

seems like this release doesn't have a music video or anything of those sorts so spotify link it is! when the song started i didn't expect to like it. i thought it would be another one of those really bland songs. while i wasn't completely wrong, this song has those 2014-2017 vibes that i miss a lot. i could totally imagine myself listening to this in the summer. it feels really nostalgic and the chorus is just really great. i think this song deserves your attention and at least a few streams!

BLACK OUT - 257

it's actually my first time giving this group a listen and also my first time finding out about their existence. it seems this is their debut? the song itself is just, well, okay. there's nothing special about it. you have your typical trending pinkpantheress type of beat as the instrumental and that's kind of it. i like their vocals, but i'm not completely sure if i like their vocals paired together. either way, i don't hate this song, but i don't see myself listening to this on a daily basis. congratulations on your debut!

crazy stupid love - Sorn, Hongseok, WILD

i don't think i'll ever enjoy any sorn song at this point. this is a no for me. sure, it's cute! but it's quite boring to me. i honestly can't even write a good review of this song because it's just boring to me. there's nothing else i can say. probably won't listen to this song ever again.

My Everything - Park JeUp

the moment the instrumental started playing i was sold. then he started singing and i was even more sold. his voice is lovely! i love myself a good ballad, and this one was very good. the song is very pretty. i will definitely add this to my ballad playlist.

PAIN - Hyunwoo

when the song started playing i had to double check if this came out in 2024. the 2nd gen vibes i get from this are crazy! i'm actually not sure what i think of this song. i love the sound, i love the 2nd/early 3rd gen vibe, but something is missing. i'm also not sure if i like his voice or not. either way, this is a solid song! it's a bit on the lower quality side but i still enjoyed it.

Ride The Vibe - NEXZ

WOW!! i'm actually so pleasantly surprised!!! i had zero expectations for this especially since, again, jyp releases are very hit or miss for me. or maybe not necessarily releases but jyp groups and their music. but this song is really great. i also expected a completely different sound from what we got. i like it so much that i suddenly want to stan this group which i had zero interest in just 5 minutes ago. i love the instrumental and their vocals so much. the song reminds me of these songs that i used to listen to on youtube back in like 2017? from a channel called galaxy. they always had anime thumbnails on them and i swear half of those songs sounded exactly like this!! i absolutely love this song and i will definitely be adding this into my playlists and looking into this group.

Cheese - SUHO, WENDY

one thing about me is i love cheese. so it only makes sense for me to enjoy this song. cheese out of the way, can we talk about how insanely good suho looks in this music video? such a serve. moving on to the actual song now, at first listen i was a bit lost as to if i like it or not. second listen, i like it. a lot. i especially like that guitar part near the end of the song i think it made the song complete. i vibe with this A LOT. the melody is nice, fun, and catchy. the vocals are of course top tier as expected from suho and wendy. i have nothing negative to say about this release. i think the concept, music video, and song are all fantastic. i do think sm's obsession with ai should stop though.

Tasty - B.I

it definitely sounds b.i! i like the beat and i do like the vibes but to me the song is just a bit too empty. however i do know that many rap songs are made with a simple beat so i will not criticise the instrumental too much. i do enjoy his rapping in this. personally though, i don't think this song is for me. i'm usually into rap songs that are more upbeat with a more interesting instrumental.

part two of the post here

[thebandcampdiaries]

blehsyu is back with a brand new studio work: "Medusa."

October 2022 - blehsyu is an artist focused on creating one-of-a-kind music that blurs the lines between different influences. Their sound covers an incredibly broad range. Anything goes from the hazy soundscapes of shoegaze down to the impact of post-punk."Medusa" is characterized by a psychedelic-tinged feel. It is a very ethereal sound, demonstrating that the artist can focus on the arrangement quality overall without compromising sound design and texture. In other words, blehsyu has produced a very enveloping sound filled with pathos and attention to detail. The listening experience is very rewarding, thanks to the great quality of this production. blehsyu offers the perfect combination of haze, melody, arrangement quality, and songwriting chops with "Medusa." The project is a great example of their artistic potential, as it s a very creative musical moment with a dark and lush flavor in which the sonic fabric is the background to the ethereal and sensual melody. "Medusa" was a mythical figure with snakes for hair and a gaze that would literally petrify anybody who would look at her directly. Perseus had to devise a clever strategy of attacking her through mirrors to shield themselves and win. Much like the mystique that drives the legend, this song has a very otherworldly twist, in line with the mysterious and ancestral nature of the tale. The track has a huge cinematic scope to it, and it feels incredibly sprawling and easy to relate to. This song is yet another fantastic addition to the sound and work of this talented artist, who is always ready to explore new musical ideas and tones in a fantastic way. With each song, it seems that blehsyu is able to explore a huge variety of influences, making their sound so distinctive when compared to the work of many other artists in this particular genre. It is not always easy to be innovative and passionate at the same time, but this artist definitely makes it look easy due to the amount of talent and focus they put into everything that they do here! The flow of this release is very natural, and the vibe is absolutely on point, making for a huge dynamic range to add weight to the sound. blehsyu set out to swiftly defy all expectations and perform glistening alternative music that combines many micro-branches of the broader shoegaze tree, including dream pop and coldwave. "Medusa" ultimately finds blehsyu closing in on a formula that's innovative yet timeless while employing a more refined, crystalline sonic palette. In addition, this release is also quite distinctive because of the sheer quality of the production. The mix is balanced and very detail-oriented, making for a lively, edgy, and stark sonic approach. In other words, there are many subtle nuances in this release, which add to the track's richness when summed up together. The frequency spectrum of the mix is also very balanced, with a tight yet deep low end working wonders along with a smooth top end, which adds a sense of clarity to the music.It is not always easy to stand out in a musical genre that often requires very specific sounds and compositional dogmas. Still, "Medusa" shows that blehsyu managed to rise up to the challenge beautifully. The sound has a unique duality as it is mellow and infectious but also upfront as it washes over the listener while projecting itself forward. With such a gorgeous and dreamy atmosphere that permeates the entire work, it's the kind of piece of music you can just get lost in. This will most definitely be up your alley if you enjoy the sound of artists such as My Bloody Valentine, Dead Rituals, Beach Fossil, Slowdive, Pretty Sick, and more.Find out more about blehsyu and check out "Medusa." This new release is currently available on some of the very best digital streaming services out there.

https://lnk.to/blehsyu

https://youtube.com/channel/UCVwAslmtlO3sKqWixIiZ2xQ

https://instagram.com/blehsyu?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

https://open.spotify.com/artist/0IgDANBWT6PIBv21ZfBTU6?si=5JBh3CVPRVOjmKJOA2y4Vg

[dato-potato]

The Batman Essay You Deserve, But Not The Batman Essay You Need Right Now.

All right, it has been long enough that I have prevented myself from speaking about it. Here are my thoughts (that absolutely no one asked for) on The Batman (2022). Spoilers ahead, you have been warned. Also it’s a lot. I have a lot of thoughts about the movie and I just wanted to get them out.

(fair warning, I am by far not a professional movie critic, these are just my own thoughts after having seen the movie multiple times)

Before I get into it, I would like to ask who the fuck the people of this movie had to sell their souls to because every single person worked so hard and put their absolute all into this movie and that is so clear in every frame, every line, every music bar, every set, everything. 

First and foremost, the music, I will never shut up about the music. Ever. It is absolutely incredible and evokes so many emotions in a way that not a lot of music does. By far, my absolute favourite soundtrack ever, and it works so beautifully with the movie in general. I found the use of Ave Maria throughout the movie quite interesting as well (I believe there were a total of four instances in which they played Ave Maria: the the opening scene in which the Mayor is murdered, the Mayor’s funeral, the Wayne family’s campaign video with Thomas Wayne in the orphanage, and when the Riddler sings it to Batman. The reason I find the use of the song interesting is in what the song is about. The title, ‘Ave Maria’, translates to ‘Hail Mary’, in reference to the Virgin Mary. In the second verse of the song, it says, “pray for us sinners, / Now and at the hour of our death”. Each time the song is used, death surrounds it: the Mayor’s murder and his funeral, Thomas Wayne who is famously dead, and then right before the Riddler’s plan is executed and the sea wall is blown up, flooding the city and killing anyone unfortunate enough to not escape the flooding. It’s minor, but I thought that was really cool). The music told the story, along with everything else in the movie, which I have not seen in a lot of movies, not the way The Batman does it.

The music in the beginning of the movie is eerie, not unlike that which you might hear in a horror movie, yet still not quite fitting the straight-up horror genre. It’s noir, like the visuals throughout the movie as well, and overall, very distinctly not superhero. There is no boisterous instruments that give the audience a sense of greatness or goodness. It’s dark and heavy, the theme itself is very strong and I wish I knew enough to be able to explain it in a way that did it justice. It’s powerful, in the way that you feel it in your chest (if that makes any type of sense, I just don’t know how to explain it).

The music in the end, however, is very much ‘superhero’ music, where it’s bright and hopeful. It expresses exactly what the development in Batman has been, from being vengeance to being a protector, a hero.

So, what is the development? I just said it was that Batman goes from being a symbol of fear and vengeance to being a protector, a beacon of hope to the citizens of Gotham, but let’s look a bit closer. The movie begins with Batman being a cryptid, he’s fear, he’s darkness, he’s vengeance. He’s not quite human. The criminals do fear him, they look in dark alleys, corners of the city shrouded in darkness and they wonder, “Is he there? Is he hiding, waiting to strike?” That’s who Batman is because that’s who Bruce believes Gotham needs. Being Batman (and Bruce Wayne, let’s be real) he clearly doesn’t interact with regular citizens, only really dealing with thugs and criminals and the police, so he doesn’t have a whole lot of opportunity to see that Gotham doesn’t need vengeance. That changes when Selina appears and he’s able to interact with someone outside of cases and fights (it also helps that he develops an interest in her and is eager to be around her and learn). He sees Selina go through what he did, how she goes after Kinzie for killing Annika, hell-bent on murdering him for what he did. I think that’s where things really start to change. Seeing what that thinking does to someone, someone who didn’t think that way before, and knowing what it will do to her. Yes, he already has his no-kill rule at that point for that reason, because he does understand that killing won’t get anyone anywhere, but I think seeing Selina go through that is what has him start thinking that vengeance isn’t what Gotham needs. Of course, this isn’t to say Selina is the only reason for his change.

Seeing what the Riddler did, knowing why he did it, and how he obsessed over Batman and how he saw them having some sort of delusional partnership is (obviously) a large part of the reason for the change. The Riddler also draws Batman’s attention to, not just the regular citizens, but the ones suffering due to unfair circumstances, the ones that society simply forgets about, when before he had only been focused on the ones committing crimes, thinking that focusing on them is what would lead to him making an impact. But he’s shown that the ones that get pushed aside by society deserve that same focus, if not more, if he wants to make that change for his city. And at the end of the movie, that’s what he does. In the monologue at the end, he talks about how crime is still happening, but we don’t see him in the streets taking them down. No, he’s doing what he can to give the citizens hope, to show them that even if it seems like their city is literally the worst, that there is someone trying to do good, someone there who will protect and aid them and keep them safe. It’s a huge development for Batman, and it will only lead to further developments from him as he continues to interact with the citizens and learns from them, because he will, because he wants to. That’s all he’s ever wanted is for his city to be safe, and seeing that he is making a difference, even only a little, is all he wants. Bruce loves his city, that’s obvious in every Batman movie, if he didn’t then he wouldn’t stay. I cannot wait to see how this Batman continues to develop and grow, how he will support and protect his city.

Something in the movie that I absolutely love is how they handle references. It’s something that I feel a lot of movies fail at, and that’s being able to put a reference in well. In a movie like The Batman that has over 80 years of content, there’s a lot of possible references. In my opinion, references should not take away from someone’s enjoyment of the movie. Anytime I went to see the movie, I went with someone who doesn’t really care for Batman and only knows the basics. But every time, they loved it. Because The Batman isn’t just a movie for the fans. That’s not to say it’s not a movie for the fans, because there are plenty of references and things that make the movie just that much better, but the references don’t have a huge impact on the plot, they’re not things that you have to understand to get the movie, just small things that make watching it as someone who does get it, so great. There are the obvious references like locations and characters that aren’t well known to those who don’t know the comics, but there are others that are just so cool. There’s Batman’s symbol on his chest, which definitely doesn’t look like a typical bat symbol we usually see. In one of the comics where Bruce is making the breastplate for the Batman suit, explaining that he’s making it from the gun that killed his parents because “The metal that broke my heart as a child? That same metal will protect my heart as a man” (Detective Comics #1000). There’s also the reference when the Riddler says that Batman is who he truly is, just like how the Riddler’s mask allowed Nashton to be who he truly is, which is seen in the comics a couple of times, like with Wonder Woman and Superman when they all hold the lasso of truth and introduce themselves and Batman introduces himself as such, because that is who he is. Bruce Wayne is the mask. 

Speaking of Bruce Wayne/Batman, that is another thing that I very much appreciate about The Batman. It is a Batman movie. Bruce Wayne does not make nearly as many appearances as Batman does which makes sense, it’s a movie about Batman, not Bruce Wayne (and they are two very different characters, I will die on this hill). Not to mention the Bruce Wayne that we see in The Batman is just... incredible. He’s so far from the playboy Bruce Wayne that majority of movies depict him as, instead, he’s an awkward recluse who doesn’t know how to handle any type of interaction, particularly human and sunlight. He also seems to be very much not neurotypical, which I absolute love. The way he interacts with people, the ‘do not look at me or I will die‘, the way he reacts when Falcone tells him about his relationship with Bruce’s father just does not seem neurotypical to me, as someone who is also not neurotypical. There is simply no neurotypical explanation for Batman or Bruce Wayne’s character, really. There is also no reveal; no one who didn’t know Batman’s identity at the beginning of the movie knew at the end. It’s not a super huge thing about the movie, but it is something I appreciated. Having a reveal would have almost been a distraction, much like any flashbacks to Bruce’s parents’ deaths or Bruce’s younger years would have been. The movie simply assumes you know, which sure, might be a bit presumptuous but not without reason. They have what is necessary, everything in the movie is there for a reason. It’s purposeful and, again, it shows just how much the people who created it care for the story they’re telling and the characters in it. Robert Pattinson does a phenomenal job in his role (not something I was surprised by, as soon as it was announced that he was taking on the role of Batman, I was ecstatic because he just has the perfect energy to be Batman/Bruce Wayne). He took a character that has had a number of interpretations and brought a whole new Batman to the screen, one that I can safely say is my favourite for a variety of reasons. Everything about Pattinson’s performance is amazing.

Another aspect of Batman that is so often forgotten in any movies is the fact that he is the world’s greatest detective, and yet, so little of his movies actually depict him doing any type of detective work. In The Batman, we get to see him investigate and gather clues, we see him being a detective, which is so amazing to have on screen (also that one scene when he first goes to the scene of the Mayor’s murder and he’s looking around and he sees that blood left behind by the carpet tucker thing and the crime scene photographer just immediately comes in behind him and takes the photo was great and I love it). The puzzles and clues and being there to see Batman and Gordon detective their way through was everything I could have wanted (also I love their friendship, between Gordon and Batman, I feel like Gordon is like one more case away from making Batman and him matching friendship bracelets). It also gave me a similar vibe of the Arkham games in the way that the movie progresses, which was really cool too.

As I said before, there is more than 80 years of Batman stories which inevitably means there are countless characters that you could include in the movies and there has been many that have shown up on screen. Sometimes, too many. In other Batman movies, they often want to have as many characters as possible show up which is understandable, but at the same time, hard to keep track of, especially if you don’t know the comics. If you have never been introduced to these characters and you then have to somehow keep track of however many are decided are important without having any prior knowledge of them is a lot and makes the enjoyment of the movie near impossible because you’re so focused on keeping track of the characters or wondering, “Wait, who are they?” Making movies of (especially) superhero movies, ones that have decades and decades of history is also used as a more accessible way to get into and know the stories behind the heroes. In The Batman movie, yes, there is a large number of characters from the comics that show up, but what the movie does differently from others is that they’re not all important. There’s Batman, Selina Kyle, Gordon, and the Riddler who are (kind of) the main characters, or at least the more important ones (in my opinion, and in the way that there are other important characters, yes, but I specifically mean to this movie, to the plot). There’s not a whole lot of side characters who you need to keep track of, the movie doesn’t try to introduce a bunch of characters that you’re expected to remember everything about. I’d like to make it clear that I don’t think the other characters aren’t important to the story, they definitely very much are, but the movie doesn’t expect you to keep track of a whole lot about them, making it easier to enjoy rather than trying to wrack your brain for some small piece of information that happened an hour earlier in the movie. They don’t try to introduce too many characters (they very easily could have had something about Gordon’s family for example, but they didn’t. I would have loved to have some sort of reference to Barbara, however, I do also know that the people I went to see the movie with wouldn’t have gotten it and it clearly wasn’t necessary to the plot to mention her, so I can appreciate not overloading the audience with characters) which also means that the characters they do focus on can have more development and become more fleshed out.

Seeing Selina Kyle as Selina Kyle and not Catwoman (yet) was also neat. Seeing her in the stage just before she really comes into and develops her persona is almost refreshing. Having her development alongside Batman’s but not having her development be because she has feelings for him and in a way that made sense to her character was perfect. There’s certainly not as much focus on Catwoman or Gordon’s development (which makes sense, this is The Batman movie), but them not staying static and truly being portrayed as their own people, not just characters beside Batman, while not taking away from Batman’s story shows just how much care and thought was put into this movie. I talked a bit about Selina’s development earlier, how her development also furthered Batman’s. She is not a flat character and Zoë Kravitz portrays her so beautifully (and she herself is absolutely stunning), she has emotions, but not in the typical ‘emotional woman’ way. She also gets shit done, when she feels like Batman isn’t doing enough, she is not afraid to do her own thing to achieve her goal. I really hope she is included in any future movies because she did work so well with Pattinson’s Batman.

Moving away from the characters for a minute, let’s focus on the humour in the film. From the vibes of the movie, you certainly wouldn’t expect there to be a lot of jokes, however, that’s far from the case. There are plenty of jokes, a lot of which are only really seen if you don’t take things too seriously. There’s obvious ones like thumb drive, or Penguin’s line, “No hablo Español, fellas?!” (honestly one of my favourite lines). My personal favourite is the scene in which Batman must escape the GCPD building. The way he just sprinting through the halls reminds me of a high school/middle school movie where all the bullies are chasing the one nerd. I don’t know why, it just did. Of course, this leads to the absolute iconic flying squirrel, and then the parachute accident. Having Batman open his parachutes to slow and land safely, and then immediately getting absolutely destroyed because the parachute caught on the bridge he didn’t calculate being where it was, comedy gold. Even if I was the only one laughing in the theatre. Batman completely bailing is top tier humour and I will not be debating. Most people see Batman as someone who is able to do anything perfectly, and having him fail so spectacularly (and then hobble off into the darkness, grunting in pain the whole way) was a scene I will never forget. The way the Riddler did lives and had like 500 followers and the way he was just super casual, “Thanks for the comments you guys,” was just so normal it was hilarious. The movie had enough jokes to offset the seriousness of the rest of the movie, but not so many that it takes away from that seriousness.

The film itself is just shy of three hours, while the average movie run time is about an hour and a half to two hours, so it’s definitely longer than most. It certainly doesn’t feel that way, though. The pacing in the movie is basically perfect, something that is so difficult to achieve while still keeping the audience’s attention, especially for that long. Again, I ask who the people who worked on The Batman had to sell their souls to in order to gain this level of perfection. Everything flowed together so seamlessly, there were no jarring cuts or awkward scenes, like I said earlier, everything in this movie is necessary. Everything belongs, everything makes sense, nothing is meaningless or filler which, for a three hour movie, is how it should be. If there was filler scenes, it would make the run time more obvious and less enjoyable.

Alfred Pennyworth. When I heard that Andy Serkis was going to be playing Alfred, I was ecstatic. I thought we would be getting even just a little bit of that badass, kickass Pennyworth we see in the comics (Alfred with a shotgun, Alfred beating the crap out of Superman, just Alfred in general, really). The movie does not have that Alfred, but I am in no way disappointed with what we got. This Alfred may not display his physical abilities (yet, I have hope that we will see more of him in future films), but what we do get is a look at Bruce and Alfred’s relationship. One of the first things Alfred says to Bruce is that he’s a reckless idiot (basically, those weren’t his exact words) and that he needs a shower. It’s very clear that Alfred is not having any of Bruce’s emo bull and that he cares so much. When Bruce looks this man in the eyes and tells him that he’s not his father, the heartbroken look on Alfred’s face as he responds with, “I’m well aware.” It’s later in the film that Alfred tells Bruce that he’s sorry that Bruce only had Alfred, that he couldn’t be more for him growing up. The amount of absolute, unconditional love this man has for his child (Bruce is Alfred’s son, I will fight anyone on that) is so clear. He is not Bruce’s butler, he never refers so him as ‘Master Bruce’ or any other title that would suggest that he is employed by Bruce. He is, whether Bruce acknowledges it or not, Bruce’s father. Bruce does seem to come to that realization himself in the movie, when he confides in Alfred that he had thought he had mastered fear, but that he was afraid. He was afraid to lose someone important to him, again. Honestly, every scene with Alfred in it had me so happy, just the way he looks at Bruce has me weak. When Alfred wakes up in the hospital and sees Bruce (before the stupid idiot son ruins the moment by accusing Alfred of being a liar) and the way he smiles at him, because he’s there as soon as he open his eyes, even if Bruce proceeds to ruin the moment with all the grace of a raging bull in a china shop. Andy Serkis did amazing in his role, even if he wasn’t present in as much of the movie as I had hoped. 

The Riddler was such an amazing character, really complimenting the dark, noir tone of the movie. He was just the right brand of crazy to fit Reeves’ Gotham. The scene where he’s saying “Bruce Wayne,” over and over, and then immediately talks about how he was the only one the Riddler and Batman hadn’t gotten was intense, I don’t think I was breathing through the scene anytime I saw it. Just the way the Riddler is portrayed is magnificent, he’s not this goofy “heehee hoohoo, riddle me this,” villain, and one that hasn’t been overused (the Joker). Paul Dano’s performance as the Riddler is wonderful, he shows that the Riddler is just as much of a villain as any others we’ve seen on screen, he is just as dangerous, just as capable to cause destruction and devastation. The use of modern aspects like the little lives he had were great (and hilarious) but Paul Dano’s overall performance was incredible as he really demonstrates the Riddler’s character. How Gotham and his situation growing up were his motivations behind doing what he did, being inspired by Batman, and that it was his trust for someone he clearly looked up to being completely destroyed after he found out about the renewal plan (even if it wasn’t what Thomas Wayne had intended for the renewal project, Nashton was still devastated by the fact that he believed Thomas Wayne lied to him and the other kids), everything really came together thanks to Dano.

There were also a lot of small things I really liked about the film, like how Batman actually uses his cape (not as an intimidation tactic to make him looks scary, but when he uses it in his fight against Selina where he whips it above her head in an attempt to confuse her). I was also pleasantly surprised how not totally gross the men were in the movie, even while there were quite a few scenes that took place in clubs. In particular, when Selina goes into 44 Below and talks to Colson, even though she is flirty to get information out of him, there’s no sexual talking or touching which I definitely appreciate. I love the fact that the reason Batman didn’t figure out the last piece of the puzzle was because he grew up privileged (also I love Martinez so much, I really hope we see more of him because he’s just everything). The car chase scene. The way the camera is upside down, watching as Batman makes his way over to the Penguin, fire blazing in the background with the theme music blasting had me near tears, I was so overwhelmed by everything. The steps, holy moly, the steps. I never thought that footsteps could be hot until The Batman. Or maybe it’s better to say that the footsteps in The Batman just make me feel some type of way, no other footsteps. The gender envy I felt whenever the Batman does his stupid little slow walk with the theme blaring is stronger than anything I have ever experienced before. The last few minutes where Batman leads the people through the flood and when he stays with the person getting airlifted out of the city were beautiful and I think about them before I go to sleep.

Now, it does seem like everything was perfect, but that is false. I do have some (admittedly small) complaints. One is the fridge door, why did they leave it open in that one scene, I am so mad about it, I can’t stop thinking about it, I have nightmares about that scene. The costume designs were incredible and I do love them, but I will say, Batman’s suit doesn’t add to the cryptid energy like I was hoping for. The criminals who haven’t fought with Batman may still see him as non-human (because that’s what Bruce was going for, he wants them to think he’s untouchable) but his suit being so heavily armoured takes away from that, which is unfortunate but I do understand the appeal. Having said that, he definitely looks really cool and I really hope we see him develop the Batman more in future films.

The actors all did a phenomenal job, each and every one of them. In fact, every single person who had anything to do with this movie did amazing, and I would like to give them all a gentle kiss on the forehead for their hard work. I am not knowledgeable in set design or movie making at all, really, but everything was gorgeous and I cannot wait for more. I will definitely be going to see the movie many more times.

The Batman in the movie is absolutely most certainly just the right amount of stupid, smart, caring, and emotionally constipated to adopt a child and allow them to fight crime with him and would aid in developing the Batman’s character further and I cannot wait.

If you made it this far, thank you for taking the time to hear my thoughts <3

[gxrlcinema]

hey, thanks so much for reblogging and using some prompts from my soulmate post :) it really means a lot! the headcanons you’ve written with Bucky have been so sweet :,) if you could do one with ‘g’ i will love you forever <333

Hi! I've absolutely loved writing the headcanons based on this post, Thanks so much for making it! I'm assuming you wanted this headcanon with Bucky, so that's what this is.

guardian (it is said that the person who saves you from a near-death experience is your soulmate—drowning, car crash, etc.)

trigger warning: blood (non-graphic), angst

It's the stuff of folklore, really; something your grandmother used to tell you about when you were young enough to sit on her lap. Soulmates were the ones who came when you needed them most; who saved you from the brink of death. There were always stories about two souls who had found each other when one party rescued the other from a burning building, or a car accident.

"Someday, somebody's gonna save your life," she'd say. "And that somebody's your soulmate."

Your mother would scold her for it, telling her not to fill your heads with fairytales. There would be no prince to save you. Soulmates, according to your mother, weren't real. But you believed in your grandmother, in an old-world magic that wove itself into the fabric of your life. You grew into a full blown dreamer, with a heart full of love and restless spirit. Of course, you weren't keen on getting yourself into a life or death situation, but if you did, you'd hoped that your savior would be there.

When you moved to Bucharest, you did it with a pocket full of cash and a head full of fairytales. You wanted to see the world, to explore.

You ended up in a tiny apartment in a shoddy neighborhood. It didn't bother you that much; you knew Sorin who worked at the bakery around the corner and Alina who lived in the apartment across the hall. It felt like your own little town, and if you hummed the opening song from Beauty and the Beast as you walked around, that was your business.

At night, it didn't feel as wonderful as it did in the daylight. You often worked the late shift, walking home on dark streets with your senses on high alert and your keys clenched between your knuckles. It was on one of these nights that you heard a noise coming from the alley next to your apartment. Whimpering.

You knew it was dangerous, had heard all the stories about people getting lured to their demise by fake injuries, but you couldn't just ignore whoever was in the alley.

You poked your head around the corner.

Slumped against the wall was a man, one who seemed to be rather large. In the faint streetlight you could just make out his silhouette, hunched over himself and clutching at his side. There was also the faint glint of blood on his fingers,

"Sir," you called out, still a little hesitant. "Are you alright?"

He turned towards you, brows knitting as his eyes grew wide and terrified.

It was something in his expression, the way he looked skittish, like a wild animal. Slowly, you walked into the alley, kneeling in front of him. You didn't reach out to touch him, although the closer you got the more concerned you grew about his wounds. There were cuts along his jaw, crusted blood under his nose, and the wound he was pressing his gloved hand to was so massive that you could see either end of it where he wasn't covering it up.

"Oh gosh," you said, taking it all in. "We need to get you to a doctor."

He flinched at the word, wild eyes (that you now could see were an ice blue) trained on you. His muscles tensed, like he was ready to fight.

"Okay," you put your open palms up. "No doctor."

He relaxed his muscles a fraction, and then winced at the pain even the slight movement had caused.

You looked at the stranger. You didn't know him at all, but you couldn't let him die here.

"My apartment's just upstairs. I could bring you there, and at least try to stitch you up."

He looked at you then, his eyes piercing. You squirmed a little bit at the weight of his stare but allowed him to study you. It went on for what felt like hours. Then, he nodded, and tried to struggle onto his feet.

It took all your strength to help the stranger limp out of the alley and up two flights of stairs to your apartment. He didn't say a word the whole time, just nodded or shook his head when you asked him something, the occasional grunt leaving his lips. His eyes stayed wild, alert, but at least his body seemed to relax after you'd patched him up. Afterwards he tried to get up to leave, but you refused.

"I don't think those stitches are good enough that they won't tear. Just sleep on my couch," you'd told him. And then, sensing somehow that he wouldn't listen, you added a "please".

He slept on your couch that night. In the morning, you asked if he had a place to go.

"No," he'd whispered. It was the first time you'd heard his voice.

"Then I guess you're my new roommate."

He made an odd roommate, but not a bad one. You never saw him without full sleeves and gloves. He cleaned almost compulsively; you'd go out for groceries or to work and you'd find your entire place spotless, your laundry neatly folded in a basket on your bed. He still didn't talk much, and when he did, it came out in one word answers to direct questions, like it'd been hammered into him that he could only speak when spoken to.

He never gave you his name (he got this angry, broken look on his face when you'd asked) so you took to calling him "Alleycat", "Al" for short. He wrinkled his nose at the nickname, but he never stopped you from using it.

It became clear that he wasn't just secretive, but genuinely didn't remember large chunks of his own life. He'd stare out the window for hours on end and when you finally went over to check on him, he'd simply mutter "I think I'm American" or, "I don't think I used to keep my hair this long".

You liked having Al around; it made your apartment less lonely, and it made you feel warm inside every time you got him to smile a little or say a full sentence. Sometimes you'd make dinner together, and, lacking for conversation, you'd tell him stories. Embarrassing memories from middle school, the plots of books you'd read long ago, or the mythology your grandmother had spun when sat on her lap. Al seemed to enjoy it, or maybe he was just relieved he didn't have to answer any questions.

Over time, Al became more comfortable. He let you see his bare left arm (and, yeah, it was a bit of a shock that the thing was entirely made of metal) and told you what bits of his life he could remember. You established little traditions; holding his hand when he started screaming at night, reading a book on the couch while he sat at the table and wrote in a notebook. He started sleeping in the bed with you at night. He called you "sweetheart" when he was in a good mood. Alina across the hall called him your "boyfriend" and Sorin at the bakery threw extra cookies in your order for "that man you keep around".

It wasn't always perfect: he still screamed in his sleep, still lost time just staring at one place for too long. He was anxious a lot, blue eyes darting around, hands always tensed and ready for a fight at his side. But he made you smile. He made you feel less alone. Days turned to weeks and months and he remained a constant, something you knew you could count on. Al, with his elusive but brilliant smiles and his terrible forgotten past, wove himself into fabric of your life. He became part of your home.

It was a Tuesday evening when you got home from work to see him sat on the couch, his hands clasped in his lap, a stormy expression on his face. His backpack sat on the floor next to him.

You drop your purse next to the door. It hits the wood floor with a dull thud. There is silence in the room.

"I remember," he says, voice low and solid.

You'd waited to hear those words for a year, and they should've tasted sweet. They taste, instead, like a goodbye.

"And now you're leaving?"

You feel cold. You feel like the whole world has shifted on it's axis.

His face shifts. For a second, he looks so scared, but he covers it with a heavy sigh.

"I, uh- It's not a good idea for me to stay here anymore. Not safe. I've... done some bad things for some bad people, and they're not too happy that I'm not doing those things for them anymore."

"I knew that you were dangerous," you say, unable to look at him without shattering completely. "I mean, I've always known that. I found you bleeding out in an alley. You refused to go to the hospital. If it's a gang, or the mafia, or, or-"

He almost laughs, in a way that doesn't reach his eyes.

"I'm a whole lot more dangerous than that, sweetheart."

You look at him then, take in the shame and guilt of the man who'd become your home. Just this morning he'd made you coffee and smiled at your stupid jokes. Just this morning you'd thought maybe he'd let you kiss him.

"Al, I-"

"Bucky," he cuts you off. His face is contorted into a humorless smile.

"My name is James, but everyone used to call me Bucky."

"Bucky," you smile despite yourself. He finally has his name, his real name. Oh G-d, he has a name and he's leaving you.

"Please don't go," you say. There's a hot tear dripping down the tip of your nose.

"Y/n, I-" He pauses, looks at you, then switches tactics. "I've done a lot of bad things. Killed a lot of people. Innocent people."

"I don't care," you tell him.

(You do care, but dealing with the fact that your almost boyfriend is a serial killer is a problem that can be dealt with after you convince him not to leave you).

He gives you that awful not-smile again. "Yes, you do."

"Please don't go," you say again.

He draws in a shaky breath, and you finally notice that he's been crying too.

"Remember that story that your grandma told you, about the soulmates? How soulmates save each other?" he asks.

You can't make your voice work, so you nod.

"That night in the alley, you saved me. I would've died if you hadn't stitched me up."

You can't help the sob that comes out of you, especially when he grabs his backpack and stands up. He walks over to you, kneels in front of the armchair and looks up into your eyes.

"I've known for a while that you were it for me. Hell, I probably knew it that first night."

He takes your shaking hands into his own, and squeezes them. His face is blurry through your tears, and you think that this will be your last memory of him. Obscured and distant.

"It's my turn to save you, sweetheart," he says. And then, more desperately: "You've gotta let me save you."

You're crying too hard to do anything but look at him, let him take in the hurt and pain and concern you know is written all over your face.

Bucky gives you a tight lipped, watery smile. He looks at you for a while, memorizing you.

("I've got a crap memory," he'd said once, after you complained about him staring. "I gotta make sure I don't forget your face.")

Your eyes are closed, but feel his lips press against your cheek. You listen to his footsteps as the walk to the door, hear the creak of the door as it opens, the tremor in his breath he lingers for a moment. Then the door clicks shut.

When you open your eyes, you are alone. You're at your apartment, but you're no longer home.