#but also means they might bring up -certain- things that 😭 i do not wanna talk about ever again lol

[snapbackslide]

ramen dinner with the girls tonight 🤩❤️‍🔥

[shiratamahatsumiyo]

Daniel Park with Daki reader

I know that this seems annoying but thank you guys very much! 200 followers...Wow... I actually didn't think I'd reach this far... Also, thanks for putting up with my BS!

Warning: Swearing, Violence

• You met Big Daniel on his second week at school. You were absent on the first week because your Leader ordered you and your brother to attack certain gangs and collect information. You weren't informed that school already started a week ago. But then again, would you even care?

• When your classmates see that you're not present in class for days, half of the student body let out a huge wave of relieved sighs, thinking that you transferred schools while the other half kept it in, thinking that your absence is too good to be true. But when announcement you return was heard, Daniel was clueless on what was happening since everyone looked like they're preparing for a red-alert thunderstorm...

Zoe: "Hey Daniel! How was your weekend?"

Daniel: "It was great."

Zoe: "Really? I'm glad! You know, my weekend was so crazy! The--"

Random Student A, running: "EVERYONE UME SHABANA IS BACK!"

Random Student B: "W-WHAT?! THAT CAN'T BE..."

Random Student A: "I JUST SAW THEM STEPPING INTO THE BEAUTY DEPARTMENT!"

• Once the announcement of your return was shared, the students whispered to one another. Even Zack's goons are quivering. Mira and Zoe looked frightened at what they heard. Jay clenched his fist and a frown made its way to his face. Zack quickly repositioned his sitting posture and is sweating bullets. Meanwhile Daniel is just confused...

Random Student B: "Eh?! They still go here?! Dude, I thought they transferred 😱!"

Random Student C: "I knew this day would come...😔"

Random Student D: "We're totally fucked, man...😰"

Daniel: "U-um... I'm sorry if I don't know, but who's Ume Shabana?"

• Some of the girls stopped rushing and approach Daniel to explain but Zoe beat them to it.

Zoe: "Well you see, Daniel! U-uh...! Ume Shabana is a student in the Beauty Department--"

!!! C R A S H !!!

Zoe: "HOLY FUCK WHAT THE HELL WAS THA?-- I-i mean, eep! What was that?"

• The more the crashing from the across the hallways grew louder, the more the students shifted uncomfortably in their seats. A few students contemplated on grabbing their bags and just leave the classroom.

Random Student B: "Guys, who cares if we miss class?! They might remember that one mistake we did to them! I wanna live 😭!"

Random Student D: "W-what if it gets worse?! What if they bring their brother 😱?!"

Random Student B: "OH MY GOD IT'S HAPPENING! EVERYONE STAY CALM! STAY FUCKING CALM RIGHT NOW! DO NOT- DO! NOT! PANIC! E-EVERYTHING'S GOING TO BE FINE! I'M... I'M SURE THE TEACHERS ARE GONNA HANDLE IT!"

Random Student C: "You calm down first 😑."

! ! ! C R A S H ! ! ! ! ! ! C R A S H ! ! !......

????: "AAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!"

Everyone: "!!!"

• The crashing sounds stopped and a girl's scream can be heard from the hallways. Everyone, including Daniel, rushed outside to see a rather beautiful but aggressive figure pulling on a girl's ear and shouting at her. A crowd of students from different departments gathered to witness the situation. They know that they couldn't bring your anger down so they can only watch as the girl struggled in pain against your grip...

Ume: "SHUT UP! DO YOU HAVE ANY WHAT YOU'VE DONE?!"

Freshman Girl: "I-i'm... I-i'm sorry-- OW!"

Ume: "IF YOU'RE SO SORRY THEN WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME A REASON NOT TO THROW YOU OUT THIS WINDOW RIGHT NOW!"

• ...What? Did he heard that right? Out the window? Daniel's breath shortened and his body froze. Countless memories of him being bullied by his superiors, if not, even other students, flooded his mind. He experienced all the horrible things they did to him... Being treated like a pig. But even HE never thought of a person THIS cruel would go that far by throwing their own classmate out of a window and dealing with it like it's nothing.

• His body moved without him thinking and pushed the crowding students to make way to you. He grabbed the wrist of your hand that was dragging the sobbing girl before you could open a nearby window. You looked up at him and scowled.

Daniel: "H-hey..."

Ume: "Hah?"

Daniel: "Let go of her... P-please."

• The words were stuck at Daniel's throat when he met your piercing glare. The glare that screamed who's superior in terms of dominance. The young man didn't mean to sound pathetic but he had to, so that you won't do the unforgivable.

Ume: "And who are you to order me around, huh?"

Daniel, flinches: "U-um... i-"

Ume: "You're either bold or pretty stupid, walking up to me like that."

• Daniel's somewhat lack of fear made the girls squealed among themselves about how daring and bold he is while the guys are placing bets on who's going to die and who's going to walk out alive. Mira hurriedly went to the faculty room so that the situation wouldn't escalate any further. Some students started pulling out cameras to record the fight.

Random Student E: "AAAHH~! DANIEL~ 😫!"

Random Student F: "Who would've thought that this guy 😳..."

Random Student G: "Is so brave and courageous? Yes, he is~ 😍"

Random Student C: "Ugh, girls 🙄..."

Random Student B: "So who are betting on?"

Random Student D: "That Daniel guy seems capable."

Random Student B: "Yeah, y'know that one time he not only dodged Zack Lee's punches, he blocked it!"

Random Student D: "Oh yeah! I still rem--"

Zack: "I bet on Ume to take down that fucker."

Random Student B: "Crap, he heard us 😨!"

Random Student D: "Stop making us part of everyone's grudge list, man. Ume's is already bad enough 😔..."

• The sounds of noisy, horny, ugly women made your ears ring... This is irritating. The nerve of this idiot to...

Ume: "DON'T TOUCH ME."

!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Daniel: "!"

• Daniel didn't see the fist coming..........

Random Student B: "W-w-what the fuck 😱?!"

Random Student D: "He... With just one punch 😨?!"

Random Student C: "Oh shit, he's as good as dead 😔."

Random Student A: "E-even the wall... 😰!"

Zack: "Told ya he's a wimp. I won this bet."

Jay: "!"

Zoe: "DANNY!...Dan... Wake up!...call......where are .... Mira!.....eachers?!"

• Daniel felt his head ring and something warm and wet dripping down from his nose. The last thing he sees is Zoe screaming at his face and Jay lifting him up. Everything became blurry before going pitch black as he fell unconscious. He then wakes up in a familiar old house.

Small Daniel: "Mhh... Wha....HUH?!"

• Daniel immediately recognized his surroundings and realized that his bigger body is without conscious and he switched to his smaller body. He tried his best to fall back asleep but after a few hours, he couldn't. He searched in his belongings in a panic for his phone and put on a relaxing ambience video. A couple of attempts after that, he finally fell asleep.

• He finally wakes up in his bigger body with a headache. He blinked his eyes and sees that he's in an infirmary. He looked to the side to see the school nurses standing and admiring his sleeping face.

School Nurse A: "A-ah! He's awake... Sorry to disturb you~ Do you want to rest more 🤭?"

School Nurse B: "How are you feeling, handsome ☺️?"

Daniel: "Uhm... I'm fine, I gue- OW!"

School Nurse A: "Oh my! It seems that Shabana delinquent knocked you out pretty hard 😯..."

School Nurse B: "You shouldn't move so much. You have a cut on your forehead and a nasty bruise on the side 😧."

Daniel: "Sorry, ma'am."

School Nurse B: "Ohh, please! Don't call me "ma'am"! Call me by my name-"

School Nurse A: "He was talking to me 😠!"

School Nurse B: "No, me 😡!"

Daniel: "I wanted to ask... do you happened to know what happened?"

School Nurse A: "Uh well... you see, we heard that you were involved in a fight with Ume Shabana. You were hit-"

School Nurse B: "With one punch 😮!"

School Nurse A: "Yes, you were struck down with one punch- but it doesn't matter, you were trying to protect that girl, right ☺️?"

Daniel: "I-i was..."

School Nurse B: "OMG, you are such a sweetheart. I'm like, so jealous of her 😩."

School Nurse A: "Stop rambling, you dumbass 🙄."

• The nurses insisted that Daniel should rest more and that he's excused from his absence in class. The wall clock hits 5:00 PM, Zoe and Jay came to the infirmary to check up on Daniel. Zoe was fussing over him, reassuring him that he did nothing wrong and the attempt on trying to save the freshman girl was heroic. Jay just smiled, relieved that Daniel is okay. The blonde didn't say much and left. Just then, the freshman girl entered the infirmary with the intention to thank Daniel by giving him treats from the cafeteria. Zoe got a bit territorial despite her positive remark about saving her. Daniel thanked the girl and she left the infirmary skipping happily.

• Daniel asked Zoe what to the violent delinquent and she showed him a video from her phone....

• He couldn't believe it... He didn't even see how you punched him... You were so fast... Too fast... With just one punch, he collided with the wall. The impact was so great, it formed cracks on it... The side of his head was bleeding... You shoved the girl away and complained about Daniel thinking too highly of himself... At least you didn't drop the girl out the window... The video ended with your figure leaving and students gathering around him.

• After that encounter, he made a mental note to himself that no matter how his second body would help him overcome his fears, there will always be a person much more stronger than him. He started attending class a couple of days later. Every girl praised him of his action and even some of the boys acknowledged his boldness of facing you. However, some of them were pissed at him because some people are praising your stupidity.

• He the learned that you are not a person to be messed with. You are beautiful but deadly... reminding him of the obnoxious girls back in his previous school. You are hella strong too! Seriously, how are you so strong? It doesn't make sense that you beat him with just your fist. You also despise being around people of what you deemed unattractive and bully them. Maybe that's why you preferred to go to the Beauty Department. In contrast to your demonic strength, your gracefulness caught him off guard... He really thought that delinquents like you would look brash and intimidating. But perhaps that's another technique of tricking your opponent to think that you're not a fighter.

• You sometimes like to tease a flustered Daniel and flirted with him with a few death threats here and there, but you never meet him again after your brother told you not to. Meh, it's not like you like him or anything, it's just that you're reminding every girl in this school that no matter how attractive they are, the most handsome guys always look at you.

• Speaking of your brother, his impression of your older brother, Gyutaro, was also not so great... The first thing the tall and scary man does when he sees Daniel is threatening him that if he lays a hand on you, he will not be getting it back. The boy, not only kept a distance from you, he avoided you because of that.

• Figured out that the reason why you and your brother were not expelled is because the faculty is also intimidated by you. Whenever they caught you bullying a poor student, you'd change face and act innocently that you are in a particularly bad mood.

• Timeskip to the timeline where Daniel is formed an alliance with Jay, Zack, and Vasco. He figured out that you and your brother were part of a gang called the Twelve Kizuki and were one of the higher ranking ones. You two are fighting for that corrupt politician named Micha- Muzan Kibutsuji by making connections here in South Korea and controlling the districts. You just used disguises and names so that enemy gang members won't recognize you. Muzan ordered you two to eliminate every single person that witnessed their crimes, including Daniel and co.. Your third encounter with him takes place in a ruined building.

• Daniel made the same mistake of charging at you first. You disabled him swiftly even without using half of your power. You were about to dispatch him when his friends arrived to shield Daniel away from you. When the speed and strength of their attacks grew increasingly aggressive, you tried to flee away from the scene and called for your brother. Zack and Jay, albeit bleeding and bruised, quickly caught up to and tackled you before you could run away...

Zack: "Hey! We ain't letting you run away like a coward after we beat you fair and square."

Daki: "I-i wasn't running away! And I'm not a coward!"

Zack: "Pssh! Yeah, right! Not buying it!"

Daki: "I am NOT a coward! I am strong! Far stronger than you!"

Zack: "We literally tackled you to the ground! Which means we beat you!"

Daniel: "Z-Zack- you shouldn't-"

Daki, tearing up: "No... no, it can't be...! I'm one of the Twelve Kizuki! I'm one of the strongest members! I'm supposed to be strong--"

Vasco: "IT DOESN'T MATTER!"

Daki: "!"

Jay: "😶!"

Vasco: "... It doesn't matter how strong you are... As long as you keep training and keep protecting the little guys... Then you're the strongest!!! All you did was bully those who are weaker than you... It's wrong!!!"

Zack: "Woah... Vasco, calm down a bit..."

Vasco, crying: "... I still haven't forgotten about you bullying that Pyeon guy..."

Jay: "😶..."

• The scene went from violent, to childish, to dramatic in minutes. Vasco became too passionate of his statement and began tearing up. Daniel gave him a gentle pat on the back. You suddenly let out a shriek and started punching the ground.

Daki, bawling: "....WAAAAAAHHHH!!!"

Vasco, Daniel, Jay, & Zack: "😨😧😦😮!"

Daki: "IT'S NOT FAAAAIIIRR! I AM REALLY STRONG! YOU WERE THE ONE'S THAT CHEATED!! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO LOSE!!...*sob*.... WAAAAHHH!!! I'VE BEEN DEFEATED!! THIS SUCKS!! I LOOOSSST!! WAAAAHHH!!!"

Vasco: "...H-huh?"

Zack: "Are they...?"

Jay: "😶...?"

Daniel: "... throwing a tantrum?"

Daki: "BROTHER! HELP ME!"

!!!!!!!!!!!!

• Cue Gyutaro suddenly appearing behind them. They dodged his strike but he still made a beeline to you. He checked on your injuries and comforted you until your crying stopped. Meanwhile the guys at the back are just weirded out. This guy responded to your call and rushed to you so fast that their eyes couldn't keep up! Which means that he is far more deadlier and stronger than you. He sicced them like they were prey and he was the predator. Expressing envy, hatred, malice and rooted it to his rapid assault. He tortured them and cackled at their pained cries in a morbidly sadistic manner.

• It took them their entire knowledge of skills, the entire night and the entirety of the Burn Knuckles to take just the two of you down... The ruined building that all of you were fighting in has already collapsed its second floor... The pillars are barely holding up... All of them are fatigued and injured, but are still fighting... And on the crack of dawn, they finally defeat both of you.

Daki: "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"

Gyutaro: "MY FAULT?! DON'T BLAME ME FOR YOUR MISTAKES!"

Daki: "I THOUGHT YOU HAD MY BACK!!"

Gyutaro: "YOU SHOULD'VE GOTTEN THAT BLONDE GUY A HOLE THROUGH THE FACE AND THAT'S THAT!!"

Daki: "WHY DIDN'T YOU TAKE NO CHANCES AND JUST SLAUGHTERED THEM IMMEDIATELY ON THE SPOT?!"

Gyutaro: "I WAS PROTECTING YOU, DUMBASS!"

Daki: "WELL, LOOK AT US RIGHT NOW, JACKASS! BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY YOU FAILED!!"

Gyutaro: "YOU FAILED AT GETTING RID AT THE VERY LEAST TWO OF THEM!"

Daki: "I'VE BEATEN HUNDREDS OF THESE KNUCKLEHEADS! ALL YOU DID WAS PLAYING WITH YOUR PREY!! YOU LET BOTH OF US DOWN!!!"

Gyutaro: "SHUT UP!"

Daki: "YOU SHUT UP!"

• During your arguement, Daniel and Vasco ordered everyone to safety now that the building is starting to collapse its walls and third floor. Daniel looked at your direction and looked back at Vasco. Vasco was unsure of what Daniel intended to do with you but he knows that it's wrong to leave you here to die. So he joined Daniel and carried the two of you outside before the building finally break down. You and your brother argued and argued until...

Daki: "....I wish you were never my brother..."

Gyutaro: "....."

Daki: "Look at us... We don't even look the same...I bet we aren't even related... I bet you made up that story of mom abusing me... I'm better off without you... You're ugly... your only saving grace is your strength!... Now that you've been beaten, you're useless! ....I WISH WE WERE NEVER SIBLINGS."

Gyutaro: "...After all these years of cleaning up your messes... THIS IS HOW YOU THANK ME?! I PROTECTED YOU FROM THAT HAG BEFORE SHE COULD LAY A HAND ON YOU!! I WORKED HARD SO THAT BOTH OF US CAN SURVIVE ANOTHER DAY!!! I JOINED THE TWELVE KIZUKI TO GIVE YOU A BETTER LIFE!!!!"

• Everyone looked at you in disbelief that the two of you still have the stamina to argue. You just sit there with your dislocated limbs while your brother spat insults at your face. You've never seen your brother this angry before... he sounds like he's been holding all of these emotions in for a long time. Daniel's body once again moved on its own...

Gyutaro: "I AM FAR BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOUR IMMATURE ATTITUDE DRAGGING ME DOWN... I COULD HAVE HAD A BETTER FUTURE WITHOUT YOU.... I WISH YOU WERE NEVER BORN--"

• Gyutaro stopped his outpour of emotions with a sudden hand gesture of Daniel covering the ugly man's mouth.

Daniel: "... I may not know what it's like to have a sibling, but I know that what you are doing to each other is wrong... you don't mean all those things. You are siblings through and through, even if the world turns its back on you, you still got each other. Despite all the bad things you did, no one will be on your side except your family... You must stick together and protect each other."

Daki, bawling: "....WAAAAHHH!!!"

Daniel: "U-um! I'm sor--"

Daki: "SHUT UP! GO AWAY!! GET LOST!!! NONE OF THIS IS ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS!!! THIS SUUUUCKS!!! BROTHER!!!"

• The others watched awkwardly as you cried. Daniel is frantically trying to get you to calm down. Huh, who would've thought that THE Ume Shabana the most beautiful, the most graceful, the most deadliest, one of the strongest foe they faced in Jaewon High... Is actually a crybaby?

Daki: "BROTHEEEER!!! DO SOMETHING!!! WHAT IF LORD MUZAN WILL SCOLD ME?! WHAT IF HE'LL NEVER TALK TO ME AGAIN BECAUSE I'M UGLY NOW?!! I DON'T WANT THAT TO HAPPEEENN!!! BROTHEEEER!!!"

Gyutaro: "........Ume."

Daki: "WAAAAHHH!!! I'M SORRY THAT WE LOST!!!! I SHOULD'VE DONE BETTER!!! I I'M SO SORRY THAT I'VE BEEN DRAGGING YOU DOWN!!!! SO PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!!!"

Gyutaro: "UME."

Daki: "JUST PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE!!! IF YOU DO I WON'T FORGIVE YOU!!! I STILL WANT US TO BE SIBLINGS!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!! "

Gyutaro: "UME!"

Daki: "!"

Gyutaro: "....I forgive you...and I'm...sorry too."

Daki: "WAAAAHHH!!! I FORGIVE YOU!!!!"

Zack: ".... Shouldn't we be...?"

Vasco, tearing up: "This moment is manly."

Zack: "What the hell is so manly about it?"

Jay: "☺️."

• So that's how your relationship with Daniel developed. It has rocky start but it's progress! You were shocked when Daniel, Vasco, Jay, Zack and the Burn Knuckles forgave both of you and your brother and even offered you to join them. Your thoughts went to the memories of your dear Leader. Oh, how you want to be by his side, but now that you've failed, he will throw you away regardless. But you still have your brother with you and your new... Friends? Acquaintances? Whatever. You left the Twelve Kizuki and allied with Daniel. It'll probably take decades to repent for your wrongdoings but at least you have your brother with you.

• A new dawn rises for you and your brother. You've always hated the daytime for how bright it is, but this time it's different. Your demons shall burn away in the light along with your hatred and wrath. Daki is in the past, defeated and burned in Hell.

• You are now Shiraume. No matter how many times you'll be reborn, you will walk with your brother for all eternity.

Daniel: "What are you going to do after all this?"

Gyutaro: "...Stay low for a while. Even if we hand ourselves to the police, Muzan will use his connections to find where we are and kill us."

Daniel: "I guess that's the safest option."

Vasco: "Ume."

Shiraume: "Ugh, it's Shiraume. What?"

Vasco: "Your apology to Pyeon-"

Shiraume: "Right. I'll do it, sheesh."

[milkovichrules]

sorry to come into your ask box but i just rewatched mickey’s coming out scene and i just… i get choked up every time. i love ian but i also feel like he pressured mickey into coming out. of course he had to set his own boundaries but he KNEW how badly mickey was treated when it came to his sexuality, it’s almost seemed cruel to give him that ultimatum in some way. but then mickey comes out and all he could do was look at ian and ask if he was happy!!!! like i cant even explain all the emotions noel was able to put into his voice in that moment, it literally break me just thinking about it! he knew what was coming and he still only wanted ian to be happy.. thats really just something. i dont even have words for it but i wanna let out the loudest scream about it

hello sweet thing!! you're always welcome here💕

tbh the coming out scene always reminds me of noel's fucking beautiful ig post about Ian's character but especially 'the truly remarkable thing about Ian's inner courage is that it's infectious. to put it simply, he's brave and an undeniable reminder to those around him; they can be brave too.'

I used to absolutely not be at all but I am definitely an Ian defender about this to a certain extent.

like do we enjoy ultimatums? fuck no. it's a shitty way to go about it. BUT I have to think about what's probably going through Ian's head, right? keeping in mind he's in/just coming down from what we can only assume is his first ever manic episode.

mickey came to find him, literally carried him home and protected him from creeps. gave him a place to stay and didn't just plonk him on the Gallagher's doorstep, actively chose him over his marriage. went to the Gallagher's when Svetlana kicked him out and asked him to come back, agreed to do whatever he wanted to get him to stay with him. slept next to his tiny bed on the floor.

mickey kissed him, full on made out with him in public!! that's so huge!! he accepted an invitation to a little gay party with ian's new friends. he slept in the same bed with him without fear in a house full of strangers!! he doesn't even know that mickey told that guy that they were together 😭

we all know mickey is an acts of service girlie but Ian is the kind of person that needs to hear it too. and when Ian DOES ask it's 'of course we are'. like it's a given. mickey doesn't need to have the conversation, but Ian does. and as far as mickey's concerned 'it's working out so far so good' to be a couple that hides.

there's a million reasons mickey might want to still keep them a bit of a secret (though its a pretty open secret at that point). sure I think some of it is to protect his reputation, to not have any sort of weakness, and to some extent I think he feels a lot of pressure in protecting the reputation of the Milkovich name, no matter how infamous it is. maybe because of how infamous it is.

but I also think it's because what he has with Ian is theirs. and its something in both of their lives that's genuinely really beautiful.

like not to bring up 3x666 but that's obviously the moment that the bubble really burst. he had built up this little secret life with Ian behind closed doors and he was opening up! he was falling in love! and once people (Terry) found out it was just ripped open completely. ruined. I think there's some element of mickey wanting them to be back at that place before it all went to shit. which of course, they never can be.

just like when Ian starts heading for the door in the alibi. he doesn't think mickey's going to do it. Ian's going to walk out and not see Mickey for a while and then in a few weeks it'll be 'just cuz I've got a wife and kid doesn't mean we can't still bang' like it was back then.

but now mickey knows what it's like to lose him and he doesn't ever want to do it again (which 🥲 but anyway)

the fact that when Ian tells mickey he's sick of living a lie mickey's immediate response is 'I'm not lying to you' somebody fucking sedate me

and of course Ian wants mickey to come out so that they can be together but 'you're not free' absolutely kills me because he just wants mickey to be okay with being himself openly. and 'what you and I have makes me free' and ian's FAAAACE but then Terry shows up and he has to watch mickey tear himself away and go straight back in the cage and it hurts. of course it hurts.

so Ian drinks a little and lets himself stew and shoves mickey toward the edge of the cliff.

mickey's voice when Ian tells him not to bother coming back and he says 'what the fuck are you talking about?' breaks my heart every time because they're fine, aren't they? they just have to get through this bad thing and then they can go back to their little bubble.

mickey's always in survival mode, just varying degrees of severity. you can see him, literally see it on his face, weighing the options.

what's gonna happen if he does nothing? he's going to watch Ian leave. again. he's going to get blackout drunk and go home with his wife and his son and his fucking dad and wake up like that every morning for however long he can stand it. he's going to be walking on the eggshells of his own broken heart.

what's gonna happen if he says something? he's going to be physically hurt. he's going to bleed. he's going to have to bite and scratch his way out of that bar unless he's arrested or knocked out first. there's hopefully enough people around to keep Terry from straight up killing him. and what else? Ian stays. Ian stays and they get to go home together. take care of each other. sickness, health, all that shit.

so he does it. he shouts and he bangs on that table and he says it and hes fucking brave!! because he might think he's fucked for life but he has one beautiful thing that's worth fighting for!!

oh my god and him asking 'you happy now?' I fucking knooowwwwww honestly it makes me a little bit? insane? there is SO much going on there.

fucking getting everyone's attention to announce he's fucking gay and 'I just thought everyone should know that' and then looking at the only other openly gay person in the room and going 'you happy now?' jEEEEEsus like?????????

the eyebrow raise as well like 'you know exactly what's gonna happen now' and of course it does.

but Ian absolutely no hesitation gets stuck right into the fight!! and he says 'I've wanted to do this forever' which, same babe. I too would take a chair to the back wrestlemania style to defend mickey milkovich.

all my blorbos shitty dads I would be in your walls but you're all dead so✌️

[pineappleciders]

Omori rw gang x s/o on their period comforting headcanons? (I’m only asking cause I’m on mine and it’s hell 😭)

A/N: sorry if it sucks i tried to get it done before yours finished so u wouldn't have to wait a month to relate to this. sorry if im late LMFAOO

OMORI RW GANG with an S/O on their period headcanons | includes: SUNNY, AUBREY, KEL, HERO, MARI, and BASIL

SUNNY

headcanon that SUNNY doesn't know shit about periods

he'll definitely be incredibly sympathetic, especially if you're cramping up

if you need pain relief meds or a heating pad, he'll have it in an instant

he likes to stay inside anyways so he doesn't mind if you don't feel like going places. you two often end up snuggling together on the couch watching movies with hot chocolate or tea

he really tries to make you feel better as best as he can, by drawing with you, playing your favorite music, getting whatever you want

he tries his best to comfort you with words but he really can't so he gives up and just,, shows his affection by doing things for you or cuddling

(pre-incident he'd probably ask MARI for advice or something)

he rips off pieces of sketchbook paper with a shit ton of doodles of random stuff. characters he/you like, animals, flowers, people, whatever. he might even throw in a couple words too

AUBREY

she's definitely quick to get you anything you need or want

you guys spend a lot of time in your bed just chilling

if you're in public and you're acting funny or something, she'll immediately know that you bled through your pants or need to change a pad or something

she's quick to make an excuse and pull you off to the side or to the bathroom

i mean this literally when i say she would steal money from people to buy you a craving food or medicine

surprises you with little comic books from hobbeez or other knick-knacks she knows you like

lots of hand holding and talking about whatever in your bed. she's sleeping over at yours every night no matter what and you guys always end up staying up all night just talking. she really enjoys your company but she eventually makes you go to sleep because you need rest

KEL

he kinda doesn't wanna get in your business so he doesn't mention or ask about it unless you say something first

he understands though, he'll kind of be softer just so he doesn't annoy you or anything

HERO taught him that liquids help cure sickness and he probably thinks it works for period pains or something

if you ask for a certain medicine from the cabinet he'll come back with like. vitamin gummies

he gets it the second time though

he feels pretty bad knowing you're in pain so he'll be quick to help you out with anything that you need,, (he always is quick to help you but more on your period)

lots of sleepovers

tucks u into bed every night. don't ask why

he also does your laundry. nothing else like cleaning or work or anything he just really likes doing laundry for some reason

his first instincts would probably be to leave you alone or give you space. but if you want him to stay with you he absolutely will

HERO

you need comfort?? food or medicine?? heating pad????? to be left alone????? he's on it faster than you finish the sentence

he doesn't know a lot about periods but he's definitely super respectful of it and tries his best

gives you the best medicine combos to combat cramps

cleans all ur shit and does all of your chores and cooks you breakfast in bed every day. he may as well be your fucking butler

brings you hot chocolate with marshmallows in bed and tucks you in with a big fluffly blanket

lots of watching shows together and snuggling

he the type of guy to go "just found out people have periods dhmu" on his story or somethign /j

if you ask him to buy pads or tampons or something he will buy the highest quality, 24-hour overnight max flow fucking gold plated pads you've ever seen

not to spoil you, he just imagines periods as the most hellish flesh-ripping experience someone can go through

he's not far off tbh

MARI

strange headcanon but i think she has the most horrific and painful cramps of all time when she has her period

so she is incredibly soft and sympathetic with you on yours because she understands too well

if you're rotting on the floor in pain she'll snap at anyone that comes in to get out

she's quick to hold you tight, get you pain medicine, water, food, whatever you need and she'll get it

she's anxious to leave your side. she always is, but more than usual

she cleans your room, tidies up around your house and does your chores every time you're on your period. even if you're perfectly capable of doing it yourself she feels obligated to

feeling cold? gives you all of her blankets, her pillows, turns the temperature up, brings you hot herbal tea, and cuddles you and MEWO

feeling warm? takes your overcoat off and hangs it neatly and gives you shorts, turns on all the fans and gets you nice cold water or lemonade

and not to mention the COMFORT. she's always talking to you and holding your hand squeezing it and speaking softly,, holding your head in her lap and giving you words of encouragement

BASIL

similar to KEL, he immediately thinks you want to be left alone and gives you space

but if you don't, then he's always there for you when you need him

he gives you little notes with drawings on them of flowers and whatnot, encouraging you and building you up (he loves praising you)

speaking of flowers, he probably shows up with a bouquet of flowers he grew himself that remind him of you. no special occasion, no date, he just wants to make you as happy as possible

i don't think he's big on physical touch, but he'll definitely stay the night or read you a story before bed to help you relax

he likes hand holding though. he'll probably sweat and run off anyways

he goes to the drug store at midnight to get whatever you want. be it menstrual products, craving foods, supplies literally anything you need he'll get it

hc that he knitted you a blanket and you cuddle it all the time but esp during this time of the month

[thegamingcatmom]

i enjoy your posts so much and i always want to send asks so…. your maggot mommy dry humps reader because she’s horny for her lil drama queen yes? or is it for another reason?

obviously nothing properly intimate has happened between your maggot mommy and reader yet so i want to know who you think would make the first proper move?

iirc theres not been a kiss yet? so like who do you think would kiss the other first? and who do you think would make a move to touch the other beneath their clothes first?

EEEEEEEEEEEE

THANK YOUUU BB 😭🥰

I enjoy receiving yall´s asks so much, lemme tell you. Seeing other ppl just as obsessed as I am and just fangirling makes me just-

Also, pls do send me all those asks because I´m needy af and I need yall to know it. 😩🤌

Aight so, that first question is very easy to answer because yes yes yes Momma is a horny lil shit and we love it. Ofc she´s got the hots for our certain someone and, if it was up to her (meaning: if someone wasn´t being so dramatic because of something as trivial as needing sleep, my goodness-), you bet your ass she´d be on them 24/7, without exception...except when it´s time for blood, guts and gore galore.

(Then again, I guess there´s no way for us to know what exactly Momma is up to whenever her darling Drama Queen is out of order. Hmm...)

But ofc there´s also the feral part to consider, the one that´s driven by instinct and urges and reacts to stimuli and that part of her is just as present, if not more, when it comes to hopping on and, yknow-

I´d say that´s also the main reason the clothes stay on (for now) and nothing real has happened yet because, as strange as it sounds (especially for someone like Momma), it doesn´t even occur to her that there´s another (and better) way to, yknow, hop on and get things done. She´s driven by this urge to catch and mark and conquer her ～mate～ and get that stench all over them as thoroughly as possible and she gets this tunnel vision and nothing else matters.

Which brings me to your next questions...

Momma does not know how to human, at all. That´s just a fact. And it´s not even that she wouldn´t enjoy if something were to happen - on the absolute contrary. It´s just that her feral, rotten brain genuinely doesn´t grasp the concept of it...yet.

You think horny!Deadite!Ellie is terrifying? Horny!Deadite!Ellie driven by actual sexual desire is a nightmare (and we might just gonna like it).

So, when we look at the facts now...who do you think would make the first move?

I know that doesn´t exactly answer your question but I´ve been thinking about that topic for a while now actually - how to best go about it considering, well, everything. I did have some ideas already but your ask made me rethink some things and well, let´s just say it´s probs not gonna go down the way yall expect it to, as per usual.

But it´s something I wanted to save for later because it´s defo an important moment that´s gonna set some things in motion and I wanna focus on other things first (meaning: more dry humping and utter batshittery) before that happens as I feel like once that line´s been crossed there´s just...no going back. A door has been closed, so to speak.

Thanks a lot for your ask! 🥰

[bellysoupset]

hi again!!

okay first off i LOVED Bella and Luke’s impromptu wedding AHHHH they’re so so adorable😭 also, i know i said sicily part 6 was WONDERFUL (all time fave fr) but i never commented on part 7 and OH MY GOODNESS i had to take breaks from reading bc of how hard i was blushing at vin teasing wen 🤭 she was so real for every single one of her reactions omg

on that note OMG so excited for that food poisoning fic I CANT WAIT TO READ IT <3 and i love that it’s gonna be angsty and touch on her body dysmorphia ahhhh 😭🫶🏽

ALSO i’ve been meaning to ask this because i feel like you haven’t talked about it much? (or maybe i missed it? if so im so sorry lol) but basically, i know you said that wendy’s parents were NOT happy with her coming out, but that they eventually sort of “allowed” her to transition bc her mental health got bad. i clearly love angst (all your angsty fics are TOP TIER🤭), so i really wanna know more about her mental health struggles. is that something you’d dive into in an ask, or would you maybe incorporate it and/or hint at it in fics? i would genuinely LOOOOOVE to learn more about this!!!

ANYWAYS again YOU’RE AWESOME & IM OBSESSED WITH YOUR OCs‼️

- 🦦

Hi 🦦!!

What a wall of love, my heart is bursting out of my chest 😭 And Sicily 6 being your all time fave of all 102 fics of mine, this is HIGH PRAISE!!

Wendy whenever Vin brings up tummyaches is like Error 404, I feel her in my bones. If a hot guy did that to me I think I might just have a stroke and die.

I haven't actually covered any of Wendy's mental health issues in my fics! I had planned on doing one in NY with Vin & Wendy, but I keep putting it off bc I know I'll have to tap on some sensitive topics that require research on my part and I'm lazy.

Here's some things I think on Wendy's case. She's always been a chubby girl, but before her transition this bothered her a lot. It added to the already installed feelings of something being off with her and even when she managed to put things together, but was not allowed to transition physically this made her life hell. It was a toss up between gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia.

She got a pretty bad eating disorder back then (which btw, never made her thin, only fucked up her health) and she s*lf-h4armed, up until her parents found out about this, alongside some pretty concerning journals with su1cide ideation and they "caved".

Simply put her parents are jerks, but they're not evil and in hindsight they do know it was the right thing to do, they're just... Well, jerks who refused to own up the fact they were wrong and certain things are still very wrong.

I think it's important to highlight Wendy and Leo are very different in this aspect, even if both of them have had suic1dal thoughts and struggled with their queer identities. Wendy is not chronically depressed, she hit a rough patch and she has since healed up. She's in a great place right now and, yes, she's got insecurities and fears, but she's not medicated and doesn't need to be.

Leo's depression is chronical and he's medicated and will always be so. Without his meds he will struggle with su1cidal thoughts and erratic behavior regardless of how happy he is with his life at the moment.

Wendy's trigger make her cry, at most they make her sad for a week. Leo's triggers cause severe panic attacks.

[sungbeam]

Hello!

Firstly I wan’t to apologize for the spam once again 😭 but I wanted to show you how much your writing means to me and to all of deobiblr since I see that you’ve been struggling with reblogs :(

I just want you to know that it’s not your fault, nor is it your writing. While I was going through the LIU ML I did notice that there was quite a huge difference in reblogs and interactions but please don’t think that it’s because of your writing! Tbh it can be a multiple of factors such as people only reading fics for certain members (even though they’re missing out on amazing stories but wtv-), ghost readers, people forgetting to reblog the second part (cough cough), shyness ig??, not realizing it was a part of a series, they’re no longer active to complete reading the series, they want to wait fir the series to end before reading it all in one go, or because they simply don’t know that reblogs weigh more than likes on tumblr :(

So…. Yeah! I just wanted to reassure you that all your fics hold such a dear place in my heart and I never want you to forget how much joy you, your fics, and your writing bring to people! Including me haha

I’m also wishing that my reblogs helped at least a little with getting more exposure to the LIU series and provide you with a little comfort that people are still reading and appreciating! Sorry, I feel like I keep repeating myself haha ^^;

Oh! And I’ve also read all your replies and thank you! Ily too 😭🫶 I wish my reactions were a little fresher but I kept up with the series since the beginning basically and I haven’t re-read them (YET!) so my reactions might be a little dull or repetitive/doesn’t bring anything new to the table but thank you for taking your time to read through all of them!

I’m a bit of a blog lurker sometimes so tbh I just read whatever was posted/asked LMAOOOO so I can’t remember exactly where I get some info from but I do know that it was said at one point 😭

Ok sorry that I keep trailing on but thank you once again for taking your time to read this and all my other reblogs and I only wish you the absolute best! Good vibes, lots of love, showers with kisses and roses for you forever! 😚

(P.s. you can decide if you want to answer this publicly or like… subtweet me or smth idk 😭 I was just a lil too shy to be all up in your dms HAHA ok bye fr now muah)

omg user floatingpluto ur so precious 🫂 PLS don't apologize for the reblog spam, i literally had the absolute time of my life both reading thru ur tags AND replying to them (´Д⊂ヽ sometimes idek what to say in response to reblogs bc i feel like i get repetitive even tho i just wanna express my appreciation :')) but it was really fun replying to urs !!!

ahhhh the trouble w reblogs 😔🤧 i fear it's a struggle for everyone nowadays, and i feel a little silly being such a child abt them when ik i prob get a little more interaction than some others :') but thank u for being so kind and considerate abt it!! no matter what, ur reblogs did help me in more ways than one and i appreciate that so, so much. also w the less interactions bit, i def understand that things r going on in people's lives other than fanfic, which is what i keep trying to remind myself of when i do have those really low days of interaction </3 ig my insecurity is just glaringly obvious nowadays 🤡😭

ALSO no worries abt whether or not u bring something "new" to the table in ur replies TT i personally thought they were quite fun and unique!! take ur time w the rereads, and don't feel like u have to just cuz u told me u were gonna !! 😋

much love and hugs!!! 💖💖

[gothsuguru]

ARI OH MY GOD??? I’M LITERALLY SCREAMMMMING THIS THE MOST SWEETEST THING I HAVE EVER READ IN THE WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD??? AHHHH I LOVE YOU

i’m abt to write a THESIS on how much i love you rn……… FIRST OF ALL let me just SCREAM abt how much this means to me like omfg the fact that you took out the time in your day to read this in the first place but then WRITE all of those kind words too??? I’M SO THANKFUL OMFG your brain works at such a higher capacity than mine in the morning i’m cryifnfnfnfn brain squiggly (you) meets brain smooth (me) <3 LET ME RESPOND TO EVERYTHING BC I AM LOSING MY MINDDDDDD & I’M SO SORRY IF THIS GETS LONG BUT I CAN’T HELP IT SUGURU (AND YOU) MAKE ME INSANE IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE <333 gonna be in MY kenny dissection era now hehehehehe <3 also first time using the indent feature………. obsessed w her

u and me are holding hands when it comes to the geto / serpent symbolism <3333 he’s soooo serpent coded. it’s insane. and the way u use that imagery here makes me fucking insane like genuinely the way the guilt CREEPS through his throat, WRITHES further down until its fangs sink into his flesh…. the ache is just so palpable. it’s suffocating him.

- OH YOU ABSOLUTELY GET IT. suguru is soooo serpent coded i think four (4) animals depict him so well and they are a serpent, fox, wolf, & a black panther <3 AHHHHH i’m glad you saw that the words i used were in tandem w how a serpent moves (shoutout synonym searching on google) & YES… PALPABLE ACHE THAT SUFFOCATES HIM.

i think suguru falls into that spiral of self-loathing so easily. i think he might even kind of enjoy it? in a self-pitying kind of way…. like there’s a kind of satisfaction in the pain, in carrying it alone, etc etc.

- YOU ABSOLUTELY FUCKING GET IT!!!!! as i was writing it i was like… suguru in this specific story is just the type to cyclically make bad decisions even if it destroys him SIMPLY bc of the instant gratification he can get by being in reader’s presence… it’s a bunch of small happy deaths to him. & YESSSSSSS he’s sooooo self-pitying and tbh that’s how i see canon suguru too… esp when shoko called him childish like she gagged him a bit there… YES YES YES *EMPHASIS* on satisfaction in carrying the pain… he hates being pitied by others but he’ll pity himself since he won’t let others do it for him

yeah. he enjoys the pain a little. the risk of it all. and this line is just such a banger in general ”a pyromaniac to his very core”….. im obsessed

- DID YOU KNOW I ALMOST WROTE THAT??? i was toying with the word “masochism” but i don’t think he’s a masochist so that’s why i went w pyromaniac! i think if he had to be one he’d be a sadist bc he knows his actions might inflict pain but certain times he really can’t bring himself to care

im sniffling i LOVE this depiction of him so much because it’s not like . it’s not one of those things where he’s scummy or where he’s just attracted to reader, it’s so much more than that… he wants to take care of u!!! keep u safe!!! warm ur hands :(( ALSO SUGU HAVING WARM HANDS SO TRUE BTW that man is a whole furnace i just know it…… but yeahhh i’m just!! i feel so soft because HE’S so soft but it’s just a tenderness that can’t really go anywhere and that makes it so hard to swallow.

- OKAY I’M LITERALLY GONNA CRY YOU ABSOLUTELY JUST FUCKING *GET IT*!!!!!!! i am SO thankful you said that you love this depiction bc he’s NOT scummy/just physically attracted and i REALLY wanted to make that distinction!!!!! it’s not just him thinking abt homewrecking for the fun of it 😭 he’s like. genuinely in love. genuinely infatuated. he’s so paternal in nature like he really DOES wanna care for reader that’s all he wants… </3 AND YESSSSSS HUMAN FURNACE!SUGURU MY BELOVED <: i made him that way bc i myself am an ice cube and i need him to warm me up 24/7 <333 omg wow “a tenderness that can’t really go anywhere and that makes it so hard to swallow.”………… holy shit that’s BEAUTIFULLY said and SO right

the flame flickering …. the risk of it all…. and the way the emphasis travels from on to and to off when u repeat on and off three times is SOOO fucking satisfying i dont know why but i lost my mind ok. and how it’s a living metaphor for his burning desire, flickering on and off… yeahhh im in love w ur writing im ready to dissect this it’s MY kenny era now <333

- it was SOOOOOO satisfying to write like idk why 😭 i love my threes (3s) what can i say <3 YESSSS IT’S A LIVING METAPHOR FOR HIS DESIRE!!!!! again the coldness of the metal too resembles the coldness of the readers hands so all he wants to do is offer warmth so he pretends he’s holding your hand <3 he’s so sick in the head i’m in love w him

his dichotomy. it’s my favorite thing about him. the contrast. he’s a deceiver. he’s a sentimentalist. he’s still smoking even when you don’t want him to. with the lighter you gave him for teakwood candles. it’s so twisted it’s so fond this man makes me ILL.

- I LOVE HIS DICHOTOMY!!!!!! twisted & fond is the best way to describe him in this fic whew

AND THE MOTH TO A FLAMEEEE my fave metaphor ever ever ever <333 his body demanding that it be close to you…. it really is like a burning desire god that’s so. suguru loves sooo devoutly and when that love can’t really manifest itself properly i think it makes him a little insane lol

- ONE OF MY FAV METAPHORS TOO!!!!! again ties into his pyromania <3 oh i LOVE “suguru loves so devoutly… when that love can’t manifest itself properly i think it makes him a little insane” OH ABSOLUTELY. i don’t think suguru can love like a Normal Person i think he literally THROWS himself full force into it… a 100% or nothing type of guy………. kinda need him idk

i love it so much because it isn’t even really a sexual thing, he’s genuinely in Love with you and that makes it sooo heartbreaking. the kiss to ur hair that u cant feel… hhhhh

- YES YES YES!!!!!!!! i wanted to make sure of that too like it’s not even sexual or that he just wants a piece of reader like that - he’s really just THAT enamored & in love. omg that faint kiss to the hair where they can’t feel it… gagged my own self too i won’t lie to you…….. i wanted to toy w slight creepiness & overt fondness i’m glad you enjoyed it hehehehehe :3

“he deserves that much as least” THE WAY U BROUGHT THIS LINE BACK BUT THIS TIME IT ISN’T SELF-LOATHING, IT’S SELF-AFFIRMING…. godddd i can just FEEL that push and pull in his brain it’s so fucking tasty i thrive off his pain im sorry 😔😔😔

- OMFGHDHDJDHD I DIDN’T EVEN THINK OF THE SELF-AFFIRMING NATURE…….. nods head fervently……. yes that’s exactly what i meant <3 see this is why peer review is so important bc you’re so smart and made me see things abt my own writing 😭😭😭 omfg same i love suguru “doomed by the narrative” geto w all my heart

IT MAKES IT EVEN MORE PAINFUL because he’s sooo affectionate so very trusting????????? he loves u both so much!!!!

- YESSSSSS!!!!!! that’s why suguru feels such insane guilt like… toru is just so pumpkin baby angelboy coded… he’s SO trusting and affectionate and doesn’t think the worst of suguru at ALL. which is why it’s so delicious that in damn near every universe that suguru is the betrayer… whew gege really made me so insane over this man

HIS WARM HANDS ON UR COLD ONES ”who would it bring solace?” is it for himself or is it for u……. he makes me feel ill.

- HE FINALLY GOT TO HOLD READER’S HAND!!!!! NO MORE IMAGINING COLD METAL LIGHTERS ARE YOUR HANDS!!!!! HE GOT TO WARM UP READER’S COLD HANDS WITH HIS WARM ONES… TO OFFER UP COMFORT… for whom? who knows not me <3

DO U WANT ME TO SPIRAL??????? ”just the summer heat :)” THERE WAS NO NEED FOR THIS DO U KNOW THE PTSD I JUST GOT 😭😭😭 suguru geto & his tendency to carry his burdens alone until he’s crushed under their weight noooooo :(((((

- PLEASENDNDNDNND i had to add it omfg 😭 i loved adding those lil tidbits from the manga in here like from the actual dialogue to satoru bursts onto the scene to just the summer heat… PLEASE i felt INSANE writing it like damn bitch 💔……. suguru nooooo don’t carry your burdens alone don’t you know your friends will carry the weight of them for you aha you’re so sexy 💔💔💔

“he figures he can allow himself this” he’s so… he hates himself for it but he can’t stop himself from wanting it. wanting you. he accepts the ache and the shame maybe even revels in it a bit??? idk i just. i think maybe he loves u so much that it overshadows the hatred he has for himself.. maybe ur presence soothes it and he just can’t get enough. it’s like a drug.

- OH YESSSSSS he absolutely DOES revel in it <3 he can’t stop himself from wanting it & you and is willing to live w that shame bc it’s coupled w his own desire… YESSSSS!!!!! i love that you likened it to a drug bc it again ties back to his self-destructive nature! his love for you does overshadow his hatred for himself but again he falls into such a sick cycle </3 reader soothes him but also unintentionally breaks him over and over again. but suguru will NEVER blame you. like EVER

AND THE FINAL LINE KAIRO I LITERALLY BLACKED OUT ”he figures he should allow it to devour him” IM IN LOVE IM TATTOOING THIS SOMEWHERE GENUINELY like the way the serpent imagery returns here . he’s being devoured by the serpent crawling up his throat. and he’s fine with it. just like u i am Weak for any mentions of devour / maw / etc so this just . Ended my whole life

- I’M GLAD YOU CAUGHT THAT HEHEHEHEHEHE serpent finally devours him whole & devours him raw <3

I WANTED TO ADD “maw” here too but i’m saving that word for use in a future fic that i’m making where suguru’s untamable spiral into self-inflicted grief causes him to want to desecrate reader’s grave to “bring them back” </333 so insane i have sooooo many ideas of making suguru suffer like sorry king your character is just so good i had to put him through the ringer for his wrongdoings <333 omg also another fellow siken lover… suguru is sooon siken-poem coded it’s crazy

ALSO AGAIN THANK YOU SOOOOOOOOO MUCH FOR ALL YOUR KINDS WORDS & TAKING THE TIME TO READ THIS :’) you really helped me SOOOOO much in terms of just putting this fic out there like your tags & hyping me up really made me feel so good :’) THANK YOU AGAIN I LOVE & APPRECIATE YOU SO MUCH ARI MWAH MWAH MWAH MWAH MWAH 🩷🥰🩷🥰🩷

Request: Getou feels bad for secretly liking Gojo’s gf and making excuses to touch her.

the enormity of my desire disgusts me.

a/n: hi! tysm for requesting :’) this is my first ever request/first time writing so please bear w me & i hope you enjoy! constructive criticism is totally welcome! <3 w.c: 2.3k

- f!reader, one-sided love, obsession, cursing, touching (not unwanted but the intention is unbeknownst to reader as geto makes it a point to always want physical contact w them), mentions of self-destructive behaviors, guilt, & delusions.

guilt creeps up suguru’s throat like a slithering serpent.

it crawls around the base of his tongue, writhing farther down, embedding its fangs into the flesh of his throat. a raw, mangled, bloody mess left in its wake.

remorse, witnessing the disarray that guilt’s plight leaves, frantically tries to discern where a home can be made. perhaps it can dance along his ribcage. pirouetting across his bones until it reaches a bloody cavern where it can dwell within a hole burrowed deep inside suguru’s heart.

maybe all of this despair can be washed away… a desire to cleanse his palate & purge his feelings away persists, yet he doesn’t allow himself the reprieve.

instead, he decides to swallow his shame down like a bitter whiskey, relishing in the thorn-like pin prickles. the harsh amber reflecting in his fatigued, glassy eyes.

the ache serves as a reminder.

suguru figures that the sharp gnawing pain that spikes his heart & torments his throat is the very least he deserves.

his therapist did say he had a tendency to wallow in his self-destructive thoughts. delude himself & cyclically make bad choices which turned into bad habits. but what’s another bad decision to him? a pyromaniac to his very core - suguru would be lying to himself if he said he didn’t enjoy playing with fire.

allowing himself a moment of respite, he fishes out a cigarette he stole out of shoko’s purse from the left pocket of his leather jacket. a silver heart-shaped vivienne westwood lighter in the right. he takes it out, rolling it softly in his warm palm, lackadaisically playing with the switch. imagining the cold metal were your cold hands instead, his own seeking to offer up warmth for your comfort. he gazes softly at the flame - flickering on and off. on and off. on and off. a burning fire reflected in his eyes. a burning desire razing his heart.

the whole world in the palm of his hands - the heart you presented to him.

(a gift from you to him - you begged him to quit smoking, it was bad for his health and you wanted him to be there in the future as best man at yours & satoru’s wedding. with a tight-lipped smile & crinkled eyes, he said he would.

always the deceiver.

you lit up, gaze softening while telling him to specifically use this lighter to light up the teakwood candle you bought him for his birthday. his smile turned fond, eyes crinkled softly with genuine mirth & adoration, he said he would. and he did.

always the sentimentalist.)

bringing the cigarette to his lips, he exhales a puff of smoke, allowing his low-lidded gaze to flit across the room. the warm lights illuminating the grungy bar, a favorite of nanami’s & shoko’s. he reminisces on the days where both of you would talk for hours - from deep conversations about space, morality, & your futures & pasts - to asking each other about what food you’d eat for eternity (cold zaru soba noodles for him, any form of potato for you), savory or sweet (both of you chose savory - suguru relishes in the fact that he has a connection with you on this), & if you two would still be best friends if the other one was a worm (both of you answered yes - you’d build a terrarium where wormguru could play & suguru would keep you in his pocket not caring if he’d be dubbed the weirdly hot worm-man.) from the serious to the silly, suguru felt his chest bloom with tender warmth. from the bottom of his heart, he knows that in this world and any others, he could truly be himself with you.

a soft sigh escapes him, a small smile gracing his face thinking about his memories with you. calling the bartender over for another drink after he downs his whiskey, he drawls out, “give me somethin’ sweet.”

he turns back around to the crowd of strangers, unintentionally smiling. he finds a few pretty boys & girls gawking at him, hyping themselves and each other up to go talk to him. he sees a few more pretty boys & girls looking away from his intense gaze, too shy to go up to him, praying instead that he’ll go to them. the grin that previously took residence on his face falters - he finds himself upset that they’d think his smile was reserved for any one of them. none of them pique his interest per usual, & he hopes that the bags underneath his eyes, his myriad of piercings & tattoos, chipped black nail polish, and overall resting bitch face will stop anyone from coming near him.

(he knows it won’t. people often went after suguru and not satoru. he was always more caring, more in tune with his emotions with an air of magnetic mystique, unlike his brash, loud, & arrogant counterpart.)

suguru intakes a sharp breath, surprising himself with the haughty & bitter thought against his best friend, quickly washing it down with a sweet daiquiri hoping to honey the words in both his throat & mind, while simultaneously praying that it would soothe his heart.

slightly more alert, his gaze wanders around the room again. tired eyes widening slightly, lighting up greatly when he sees you.

there you were in all of your glory.

sitting leisurely, a leg swung upon the other, arm resting over the back of the tattered red vinyl couch - the very same one you both had countless conversations on. how were you so effortlessly cool? you could do anything and suguru would revel in it - drawn to you like a moth to a flame.

and like a moth, he found himself gliding across the bar towards you, his feet moving faster than his brain. his body demanding that it be near you, that it be graced with your presence. with a flick of his ring-clad fingers, his cigarette is crushed underneath his black boots, a piece of strawberry gum popped in his mouth, with vanilla lip balm reapplied to his lips to make sure that you knew they were soft to the touch.

heart beating ridiculously fast, he takes a deep breath before he stands in front of you, your perfume enveloping his senses making him slightly delirious from how delectable you smell. he prays that the blush dusting his cheeks fools you into thinking that he just drank too much, & that it’s not because of you peering up at him through your lashes with your pretty eyes that are now affectionately directed towards his own.

“yo! suguru! long time no see!” you wave as you get up to greet him, a massive grin overtaking your face, eyes almost crinkled shut because you’re so excited to see one of of your best friends.

without warning, suguru envelops you into a tight hug. his left hand placed against your lower back while his right hand cradles your head against his chest, your cheek pressing against his beating heart. suguru places his chin on the top of your head, craning his face slightly to get a whiff of your shampoo, ghosting a faint kiss on your hair that he knows you don’t feel, relishing in this moment with you. for a few seconds he can pretend… he deserves that much at least, he figures.

he could stay holding you in his arms forever, your body pressed up against his, protecting you from everything & everyone bad in this world, shielding you from predatory eyes around the bar. fucking wolves, the lot of them - suguru contemptuously thinks. it’s a good thing you’re here in his arms, suguru muses, confident in his ability to keep you safe.

as quickly as that thought dashes through his brain, you pull away. not wanting to alarm you with his panic that you’d leave him, a tight grip stays around your waist, forcing you to sit back down. he positions himself right next to you, his thighs touching your own, his right arm draped across your shoulder.

something that you can consider friendly. something that he can consider more than that. affectionate, no matter which way you take it.

“it’s been a while.” a fond smile beams across his face, bright amber eyes desperately glazing over your face. you’re so close to him and he’s so attentive to you, he imagines that the boy across the bar must think you both look like a couple. the pleasure suguru derives from that thought is second to none. you do look like you’d be his. he’s certain that he looks like he’d be yours, if his devoted nature is anything to go by.

he takes a a few strands of your hair, twirling them slightly around his fingers. “what are you doing here anyways? i wish i saw you before, we could’ve hung out!” suguru teasingly pouts, lips slightly jutted out, his eyes twinkling with playful mirth.

“tell me about it,” you playfully whine. “thankfully i just got here so we have plenty of time to hang out! don’t worry, i’ll make up for it so you can forgive me.”

“you never have to apologize for anything.” seriousness takes over his tone. suguru doesn’t want you to ever feel bad, even as a joke. not wanting to make you uncomfortable with his tense energy, he eases up his features and winks, “don’t worry your pretty lil head about it - i’ll let you off the hook this time.”

you bark out a laugh which makes him elated, glad that he was able to make you smile. “sugu, you’re way too sweet! and ooh - you asked what i was doing here! toru wanted to chill out here for a bit, said if he didn’t get to drink a virgin piña colada right this second he’d faint.” you gaze around the bar, muttering under your breath “he should be on his way here soon…”

right… satoru.

suguru feels his mouth get dry by the second, a venomous pang of guilt daggers his heart. his eye twitches along with his fingers, wondering if he should take his arm off of you.

if satoru saw this would he just consider it friendly touching? would he think that suguru was trying to make the moves on you? would he scream in his face about how can his best friend stab him in the back this way? the bitter taste of betrayal coats suguru’s tongue like a curse, and before he can do anything about it, a big SMACK! on his shoulder wakes him out of his trance.

“SUGUUUUUUUU! I MISSED YOUUUUUUU!” satoru bursts out onto the scene loudly, holding both your & suguru’s shoulders from behind the couch, bringing you two towards each other in a massive hug. with satoru’s face in the middle, smooshing both of your & suguru’s cheeks against his, suguru can’t help but feel a gnawing sense of shame.

satoru, affectionate as ever, kisses you both on the cheek. snowy hair ruffling with his actions, aquamarine eyes twinkling as bright as starlight, white eyelashes fluttering against the pink blush hued upon his soft cheeks. from here, suguru can see the light dusting of freckles on satoru’s nose, & the lightest sheen of gloss on his pink lips. no doubt from kissing you before he got here.

a twisted part of suguru is thankful for the kiss on the cheek, your glossy residue imprinted on his skin. an indirect kiss, he muses.

“sorry it took so long, i had to park so far away. hope you didn’t miss me too much, angel.” satoru pecks you on the cheek again, cheekily stealing an upside down kiss on the lips from you while he’s at it.

“no worries baby, i had sugu to keep me company.” you smile wide, eyes softening as satoru smoothes down your hair.

suguru forgot.

satoru trusts him with his entire life. with you.

the loud, brash, arrogant, self-centered boy suguru knew as a teen had grown up. cleaning up his act the moment he met you. enamored with your beauty, kindness, & personable nature - satoru fell deeply in love. he was still loud - but only to proclaim his love on the rooftops for you. he was brash at times but never with you. his arrogance was also truly never unfounded, he was just that confident in his own self and in the relationship he could have with you. suguru still thinks satoru can be self-centered at times, but never about you. satoru puts you forward in every single aspect of his life - devoted. loyal. faithful. unbelievably constant with his love & adoration for you. your perfect other half. your true soulmate.

you’re his one and only. and he’s yours.

“satoru! it’s been a while.” suguru prays the loud music can cover up the slight crack in his voice. he can feel his throat constricting like a python, he coughs to clear it, wanting to rid himself of the strangling feeling. he does what he does best in that moment - putting on a facade. a tight-lipped smile along with crinkled eyes graces his features, hoping that both you & satoru mistake it for pure happiness.

“you good, man?” satoru tilts his head like a puppy, looking at him questioningly. you do the same, concern clouding your beautiful eyes. he’s terrified that you both could see right through him.

“yeah.” suguru whispers quietly.

the ache that torments his throat & spikes his heart serves as a reminder.

he puts his warm hand over your cold ones in a comforting gesture. for who would it bring solace? he doesn’t know. at this point in time, he can’t bring himself to care. “just the summer heat.”

he brushes his thigh against yours once again, fiddling with your fingers softly. he figures he can allow himself this.

glancing into your eyes, his reflection stares back him.

he accepts that living with this ache of shame & this disgusting sense of desire is the very least someone like him deserves.

he figures he should allow it to devour him.

[ki-flor]

I've seen so many queer st fans think that byler needs to be unrequited to be realistic and will needs to "learn how to love himself" but I feel like part of this line of thinking comes from projecting their life experiences onto will.. which I completely understand! I do it all the time! However, the thing is is that... Will and mike aren't real people. They have constant motivations and plot beats that drive each and every one of their actions, the things they do are used to drive a certain plot or their respective character arcs forward; if the duffer bros decided that either of their deaths would make narrative sense or they felt their characters had no where to go they could just kill them off ffs. Just because people aren't used to their past crushes also happening to be queer and feel it's impossible for it to happen doesn't mean it is, especially when it comes to writing a show about fighting monsters from a parallel dimension. ST has a problem w putting all their characters into romantic pairings, yes, but why does byler being canon mean all the other straight pairings(other than m*leven) have to be together as well?? IMO, the only ships that I see being endgame are jopper, lumax, rovickie and byler. As much as I like jancy I feel like it would just make sense; they love each other for sure, but I think their paths are gonna separate, for the time being anyway(I could def see them getting back together after college or whatever tho). And I think Steve should stay single too cuz, and this is how I feel about Jonathan as well, he really shines as a character outside of a romantic context. And El, I just don't see her ending up w anyone romantically? I just wanna see her friendships and familial relationships(esp Joyce, will, Jonathan, and the rest of the party) shine. But yeah, will and Mike's arcs are intertwined(like c'mon, will is mike's light and mike is Will's heart and u expect me to not root for them...?). Also there's *realistically* not enough to make Will's love for mike unrequited and have it be nearly as fleshed out as some people might like 😭 s5 is only gonna be 8 episodes (they're long but still, only 8 episodes), and how would mike find out about will's feelings(even tho again, realistically, WHEN would will even voluntarily tell him??), reject him, and have will "get over it" AND have the audience believe it. There's just no way, I'm sorry. Even w a corny ass timeskip 20 years later and will has a bf(who in a nightmare scenario looks like mike) people would just not buy that he got over feelings that intense that quickly and the GA would probably feel somewhat(?) happy for him maybe and/or pity at best and just make fun of him at worst.. also omfg sorry this was so long but this take annoys the hell out of meeee

I just think it's funny because people do bring up their personal experiences like "I got over my childhood crush" like good for you but I don't want to see that with Will and Mike. Realistic or not. If he's loved Mike for so long of course he's not going to get another boyfriend that doesn't make sense. Even if he did realistically that poor soul will always be in the shadow of Mike. Either way thanks for sharing your thoughts.

[seduceme-lovestruck-thearcana]

My playthrough today if Danganronpa 2:

OHHH WAITT. IS IT LIKE A VIRTUAL WORLD OR SOMETHING??? A computer started and then we see Nagito and now a DOOR AND NOW WE SEE THE WHOLE GROUP-

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OH MY GOSH I SEE THIS GUY!! IN THE WHITE SUIT AND HES BIG!!! That voice sounds familiar and I swear if you’re not Byakuya then I’m disappointed-

HIS ‘What?’ SOUNDS THE SAME BRUH. EVEN HIS LITTLE “hmph,” ARE THE SAME DJWJSB. Dang everything he says is the same lord. This really is Byakuya. Bruh what happened to you and why are you huge. Nothing wrong with being huge but like w o a h this is sudden-

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DNABJWW. THIS GUY SAID HE TRIED TO LEAVE TO TAKE A SHIT DNANS. That’s how he knew he couldn’t leave y’all I-

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BRUH THEY GOT A FEMALE MONOKUMA DJWKSB.

OH wait nvm she’s a rabbit-

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Okay so we’ve arrived at the island and Usami is talking about hope so I’m assuming she’s like…the reverse of Monokuma? Like Ik he’s gonna show up at some point, but I’m assuming she’s gonna stay around too! I’m kinda excited-

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BRUH NAGITO ALREADY BRINGING UP HOW USAMI BROUGHT US HERE SO WE COULD KILL EACH OTHER SNANS. Look at him being all smart💙.

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Nagito did his introduction and they just slide that little “Ultimate Lucky Student,” in like I forgot Makoto-

But Makoto got “The Ultimate Hope,” so I mean that’s so sweeter🥺. But I kinda bet Hajime might get the same thing so idk-

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The E~Handbook’s are back and YESSSS. I’m not one for murder but if I get to test my logic then by all means please. I actually set the logic up to mean soooo….we’ll see how I do😳. Also Nagito seems really sweet. Please don’t become bad😭.

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Opened the E~Handbook and yessss I see those question marks and Ik it means truth bullets >:)))). BUT ALSO I GET AN E-PET??? HUH? This is interesting-

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bro the way he runs😂. This layout is very cool!! I was wondering where I remembered this from but I actually have seen this like YEARS ago! I watched my friend play this game once. I’d watch her a few times but I didn’t really pay attention but YEAH!! I’ve seen this before!!! Not the deaths or the characters but the way he runs and the layout of the area anyways.

But I’m ready to meet the characters, learn about them, and find out who’s dead first-

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AAAAH WE GOT THE INTRODUCTION AND IT REALLY IS BYAKUYAAAAA-

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I wonder if he still talks to everyone. Like Kyoko, Hina, Hiro, and Makoto. I’m curious👀. But also?? How old??? Is he now??? They can’t still be freshman. Like how long is this coming from the first one??? My brain is confused and kinda excited. And I believe they’re freshman? Because I’m certain one of the girls mentioned it in the beginning? I’m not sure-

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MIKANNN!!! Babe are you okay??? She’s just like “is it alright if I remember your name?” LIKE BABE OF COURSE!!! What happened to her🥺. I just wanna hug her…please don’t become bad-

And then she’s like “it’s been so long since I’ve made friends. not that I’m saying you make friends with me!” And then she starts crying like baby I’m so sorry :(. And then Nagito just saying (twice), “Bullying a girl, not cool Hajime,” or something and like dude you’re right next to me. I didn’t say anything-

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BRUH IM WITH THE GUY WHO HAS THOSE HAMSTERS DJWBSBW. He’s the ultimate breeder and he’s asking who I made a pact with and Nagito’s just like, “…I think he’s asking if you had a pet,” LIKE WHAT-

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Anyways that’s all for tonight. I’m tired and need to be ready for my classes tomorrow and everything SOOO GOODNIGHT💙💙💙. Probably will still scroll tumblr tho-