#but also just the comforting idea of being known by people u consider friends. yeah that's it.
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Also in addition to Riku. You've also influenced the way I think about Mitsuru. In my head she's the same height or taller than Akihiko without heels and taller than Shinji with heels. She's one of if not the strongest member of SEES barring Aigis. She's a trans woman and a trans man. She's a lesbian either way. She's the loving wife of Yukari. She's super smart. She's stupid as hell. I love her though.
AHH DUDE THIS IS LIKE THE COMPLIMENT OF ALL TIME đ
But YEAH that's my Mitsuru 𼚠she's everything she's my girlboss but she fails so hard she's smart but dumb af and she loves WOMEN!!!
#asks#latenitewaffles#koopa bro#im having a moment in a good way but like.#means so much to me idk that people enjoy my interpretation of mitsuru đ shss so important to me as we all know#but also just the comforting idea of being known by people u consider friends. yeah that's it.#not just a lil void im a lil void that people care for.#reading too much into this sorry ANYWAY#yeha mitsuru is so girlboss girldad girlFAIL to me#shes my scrunkie and im glad u enjoy how i see her... and it influenced how you see her... bro...#i need to talk aboht her more again shes slowing making her way to the front of my brain again ngl#my girl is returning from the war...back to the front of my mind...#its a good sign i think
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hellooo!! I've been reading your stuff and oml I am OBSESSED!! You are such an amazing writer my dear human!! Thx for just being here to fulfill my hobie obsession lol
I don't often request so idk what u need but here goes nothing ÂŻâ \â (â °â _â oâ )â /â ÂŻ Could you do a hobie x fem! reader where the reader is super quiet until you start to talk to her?? Like she's nice but has a bit of an rbf and is just rlly silent until someone strikes up a conversation w her type thing. Maybe a story like she and hobie were assigned a job or smth together but they didn't talk for like the first few days cuz she can't hold a conversation (and it doesn't help that the man she's tryna talk to is literally so fine) but then eventually hobie's like "what is your deal why won't u talk to me?" Idk idk it's kinda a bad idea but it's stuck in my noggin
Anywayss thanks for considering/writing this!! Much love âĄâĄâ âĄ
I love!! Thank you and Iâm glad you like my stuff (: also I js watched the little mermaid and seeing that made me so inspired to write sum like this đ
Quiet
âOkay⌠Hobie and Y/n.â Miguel called you both up first, telling you the mission.
You didnât know too much about Hobie, and you donât know why you were being paired together. You usually worked alone.
âUh, Miguel, sir.â You mumbled after he explained it.
âIf youâre gonna ask if you can work alone, the answer is no.â
You mumbled something under your breath, looking at Hobie as he set a portal.
âSo⌠Iâm Hobie.â
You didnât say anything.
âY/n, right?â
You just looked at him.
âAlright then..â he muttered, thinking you were just being rude. You both started to swing.
You werenât used to being teamed with people, and he was attractive. Like insanely attractive.
You focused on the mission, completing it easily.
But that one day of teaming up with Hobie turned into two, then three.
âHey, YâKnow do you not like me or something? Iâve known you for three days and all Iâve gotten was stares.â
âItâs not you.â You croaked.
âOh she talks.â He said.
âI just donât like talking⌠to anyone.â
âGot it. Well, glad thatâs cleared up.â
ââââââââââââââââââââ
After a week, you had started to get more comfortable and talking more. Hobie was glad, because he liked hearing your voice.
âSo, yeah, no it doesnât make sense but it does if you know what I mean.â
âNah, it definitely makes sense.â He said as you dragged the guy across the floor, webbing him up against the wall.
âGood job.â He said, nodding to the passed out man.
âIt was light work.â You shrugged.
âSo, I was wondering if you wanted to hangout with a few of some other friends I got..? Theyâre cool, and I think youâll like them.â
You sighed and thought.
âI guess..â
He smiled at that. An I guess was the best answer heâs gotten out of you.
âQuit smiling.â You said, but smiled as you did so.
âYou just smiled!â He put his arm around your shoulders, and messed with your hair.
âKnew I could do it.â He smirked to himself.
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heyy im here with a request for shuri ^__^ how do you think being roommates with her would work? id love to see slow burn, angst, maybe a lil jealousy (nsfw maybe?), and fluff <3 thank you!
oh my god i think itâd be all over the place??? theres a lot of things that could happen, so here is what i think. (also.. all of this is fluff-- with implied sexual stuff. also black reader. forever and always.) this is also illiterate headcanons, meaning itâs not written in the way i write my fics with bulletpoints, its just thoughts i have and i write them down.
literally the reason why you donât have shuri as your roommate in any of my fics is BECAUSE it would be so dramatic.
i like to think itâs a dream in theory but like pair that with all the other shit, and it would be a bit of a shit show. but in a good way. kinda.
yâall spend so much time decorating the dorm room tbh. lots of records that you and shuri picked up at the local mom & pop record shop.
i also like to think that shuri designed some stupid app for yâall to use to alert each other on dorm room things.
itâs nothing big to her, but to you it means a lot bc it shows she cares about how you two function as roommates.
basically a whole honeymoon phase when you two are first becoming roommates because yâall were already friends
but of course,,,, that kinda ends.
you two had a routine of who did what in terms of âchoresâ
usually shuri washed your clothes for you. you genuinely never asked her to do it, but she always did it because she was sweet like that.
for her, you would clean up the room.
itâs a healthy balance, and considering yâall are friends, itâs not awkward at all.
you two also eat lunch and dinner together all the time, and usually one of you pays for lunch, the other pays for dinner.
this only became a thing because you hated shuri paying for meals all the time, and so she thought itâd be a better idea for there to be equal playing.
so yeah, yâall live in peace and harmony for a while!
until sheâs starting to get comfortable around other people on campus
you canât blame her bc you literally were the one to give her advice on feeling comfortable around everyone
and since sheâs known for being a princess, itâs expected to get attention from people.
but she definitely starts enjoying this attention
donât get me wrong, sheâs humble
but now sheâs comfortable with... other girls.
you werenât worried about guys, honestly.
guys were like. always shut down by her to begin with
or they just saw her as âone of the boysâ (a cringe term, but a truthful one)
but because shuri was incredibly attractive, carried herself in a masculine way but knew how to be respectful to women because she is one
all of the girls are falling head over heels for her.
shuri is lowkey oblivious to this too.
like, one time you had dinner alone, some cheap chinese food on fry street or whatever,
you had told shuri but she didnât even respond. kinda hurt too because yâall loved getting chinese food from this spot on friday nights.
so youâre back at the dorm, probably watching pose on your bed (itâs a very angsty show.. makes sense on why you would watch it.)
eating the chinese food.
and here comes shuri coming back into your dorm with a girl.
yes, you heard me,
a mfkn girl.
now yâall arenât officially together so you couldnât say shit but at the same time itâs like, mf you always text me back whenever i tell you plans????? why didnât you do it this time???
sheâs looking at you like âoh shitâ
and youâre like
âyeah u done goofed, alright.â
and this girl she done brought to yâalls dorm is talkin bout some
âuh.. you didnât tell me your roommate would be here.. your roommate is a majorette?â
so now this girl has a bone to pick with you as a majorette??? girl huh???
âuh, yeah. i hope thatâs not a problem.. i just thought we could watch a movie or something.â shuri is freaking out like craaazy in her head
â..nah, thatâs cool. text me later, shuri.â before you know it, that girl was GONE.
the silence between you and shuri is mad awkward now
literally you gotta be the first one to speak
âmy text message wasnât good enough to reply to?â your tone? bitter as hell.
shuri is cringing now bc she KNEW you were gonna bring that up.
âi swear my phone died. i was at a party.â oh shes going to PARTIES without YOU, now???? psh thats CRAZY
because youâre known for usually going to a house party but this time you wanted to chill at the dorm.
âa party, huh? you didnât ask if i was gonna go?â
âyou usually go, so i didnât think to ask.â
âso now you just assuming?â
the way you two are responding to each other so quickly now is unreal. thatâs how you know some shit is going down.
âi donât see why it matters so much, i want to experience college life too.â
dammit, she has a point.
all you can do is stare at her.
âlook, iâm here now, we can just watch whatever-â
ânah, too late now. iâm going to bed.â petty ass reader, you. you want her to KNOW youâre heartbroken đ
shuri isnât budging anymore. she can clearly see you donât want to engage in conversation anymore.
you turn your laptop off, and donât even bother plugging it in because youâre just so mad.
you turn off that lamp on your side of the room, and you pull them covers over you mad hard and turn around so she canât see you.
mind you, sheâs watching you do all of this.
itâs about twenty minutes of silence. youâre awake during all of this.
now theres some extra weight on your bed.
can you guess what it is?
hint, itâs shuri climbing into your bed to come cuddle you.
âlook, i know i fucked up. usually i donât mess up and not respond like this. i guess iâm just desperate to fit in, especially since this culture is so much different than mine. i want to experience it.â shes whispering in your ear now.
she stops talking for a moment to see if youâll say anything, but you stay silent to keep pretending that youâre asleep. you can hear her lightly breathing, and god, does it send shivers down your spine.
âi guess i screwed over the person who showed me all of this stuff in the first place. i enjoy being roommates with you, your company is amazing and i wouldnât want it any other way.â
you hear her stop for a moment, and her breathing stops with it. now sheâs choosing her next words carefully.
âi know youâre awake. you donât have to say anything, but just know, i really appreciate you.â
smooch.
this girl fr kissed your cheek.
now you can sleep in peace.
...
do you see why being roommates with her would be absolutely dramatic, now?
#shuri#shuri udaku#shuri udaku x reader#shuri x reader#shuri x black!reader#hbcu!shuri#black reader#headcanons#headcanon#sam answers asks#sam is obsessed with shuri#princess shuri
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HI <3
I am curious to know if u have any unpopular or not so popular opinions regarding The devil judge canon or fanon? if u are interested of course! i hope u have a nice day <3
i have two that i can explain below, but it's not the end of the world to me (well no. one bothers me but also w/e). ultimately i split the way i view tdj in the sense of like, there's au stuff that is more canon-compliant and then there's alt-uni stuff that's canon-compliant, but also au stuff that i love but feel it's a bit ooo but they're my little playthings so idc, lmao.
but here are two. the first one is a hill i'm willing to die on. the second is me just like, pleaseeeeee can we consider but not a big deal, lmao.
gaon never had any intention of marrying soohyun, dating her or believed he would actually end up with her. he did not romantically love her in any sense of the word. i see this written in fic quite often, and i've explained this is previous meta posts - but the reason gaon ran back to soohyun and kissed her wasn't because he woke up and realized his feelings. he went back to what he knew; he went to her because she was comfortable, because it's all he's ever known, and the thought of parting from that was terrifying. let's even take gahan out of this - yohan challenged gaon in a way he'd never experienced. yohan let gaon exist and make mistakes and be himself for what's arguably the first time in his life. soohyun didn't like that, and gaon was given an ultimatum by her because she didn't like his choices. she whipped him back into her 'perfect boy' box she's held the key to for years, and he did it because he couldn't lose her. not because he was in love with her but because when you've known someone since you were 16 years old and they were there for you through one of the darkest times of your life and that's one of the only friends you have? yeah, what choice are you going to be making between that or an extremely agenda-driven, sometimes violent older man willing to bend the law and that you've only known for just a few months? if that also meant giving into soohyun's advances and dating/marrying her and being unhappy for the rest of his life, gaon was willing to do it. gaon's growth in the tdj is recognizing that being in that box with the professor and soohyun kept him from the reality of the world, but going about finding justice yohan's way only puts more people in danger. gaon's a hidden little gem ready to become the third option and answer for a country that desperately needed change.
ik we all think yohan is a sex pot ,and he weaponizes his beauty to get what he wants, which i think is trueeeee. but when it comes to actual sex, not just the flirting side, i have two ideas i think can coexist: yohan has slept with others vs. yohan has never been with anyone at all, and i wish the latter was explore more because it makes a whole lot of sense to me that yohan is touch-averse because of the physical abuse; he was never liked as a child/teen, and he's always had other priorities and chose to focus on schooling over dating. his self-loathing and believing he was truly a monster also factors into this.
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hiii can i request tsumu, kenma, oikawa, and kuroo where theyâre in a secret relationship and the reader feels like theyâre hiding her bc theyâre ashamed of her ? like a hurt too comfort type of thing? thank u bb đĽşđĽş
- đ
secret relationships w/ atsumu, kenma, oikawa, and kuroo
a/n: i have so many angst requests,, yall must like getting hurt đ also this wasnât as angsty as i thought it was gonna be since im going through writers block yet again and i can not handle pain rn (also not proofread, so read with caution lmao)
â m. atsumu
it honestly surprised you at first, the way someone like miya atsumu returning your feelings the moment you told him you liked him near the start of the school year
there wasnât that instant gratification though, knowing that one of inarizakiâs golden boys still felt out of your reach
despite being in a relationship with you, it wasnât like anyone knew of it besides osamu and your closest friend
of course you didnât really mind as youâve always thought couples who were obnoxious with their relationships 24/7 and constantly making out in the hallways wasnât your cup of tea either, so you get why atsumu wanted to keep it a secret
besides, with a guy so popular like him, you really just thought he was sparing you from the harassment (not that it would be bad if all the girls crushing on him new)
you get that he was just trying to protect you, and yet the more you thought of it, the more than it was simply just an assumption and you really didnât know why your relationship was kept secret
it wasnât like either of you would get backlash in any way, so what was the problem?
you werenât exactly the type to be the most insecure either
sure, you were aware of the flaws you had, but it wasnât something you were ashamed of as you learned to get used to it
yet itâs hard to fully love yourself when your boyfriend isnât even comfortable with the fact that no one knows you two are even together
you hated jumping to conclusions, but you couldnât help but to think the worst case scenarioâwas he ashamed of being with you?
you honestly thought the idea was impossible
if he was seriously ashamed of the thought of being with you in public, why would he even waste all those months dating? were all those dates and nights sneaking out to see each other for nothing?
it was like this for weeks with the way your own thoughts sabotaged you as you stood next to him during lunch
in moments like this in school, surrounded by your classmates and acquaintances, you and atsumu were only friends who sat next to each other occasionally and shared conversations that only friends would have
only friends
god, you hated the way that atsumu wouldnât even look at you the way that he would when you two are alone
was he that embarrassed to be with you?
you didnât want six months of all your hard work and effort of making time to be with him for nothing,, you had to do something about it
everyday, you, atsumu, and osamu would walk to school together with osamu typically walking ahead of you and your boyfriend
most couples would hold hands as they walked together, but atsumu had made it explicitly clear as the closer they get to school the farther they had to be from each other to avoid suspicions
thinking of it now, it sounded wrong to begin with and you had no idea why you even agreed to do such a thing
the school was close, maybe a block away and instead of slowing down your pace to create a gap between you and atsumu, you stubbornly stayed next to him to which he flickered you a weird look
he shrugged it off but the moment you two passed the gates and into campus, you slipped your hand into his
without missing a single beat atsumu immediately pulled his hand away from you with a look on his face that held all the questions running through his head at that very moment
âwhat are you doing?â he asks, almost in a harsh whisper
a frown melted upon your expression at how quickly he pulled away, almost as if he was disgusted by you. âi um, didnât know you hated the thought of people seeing us together so badly.â
you didnât know where all your strength went as it disappeared the moment you needed it the most
yet as you were about to walk away, atsumu tugs at your wrist lightly and pulls you into his embraceâhis warmth and comforting scent of chamomile from saved you from the embarrassment that was tainting your cheeks red
âno, no itâs not that,â he mutters, lips tickling your forehead. âi just wanted to keep you to myself a bit longer.â
â k. kenma
you honestly werenât surprised at the fact that kenma wanted this relationship to be kept secret
he never seemed like the type to be in a relationship let alone get the attention of being in one in the first place, yet it irked you to the core
it was fine at first; acting like you two were just friends while at school or at volleyball practice and it wasnât at all weird or out of the ordinary
maybe thatâs why you were okay with it in the first few months of your relationship with kenma as you were always near him the majority of the time
yet you constantly had to fight the urge to not be so touchy with him from wanting to hold his hand to leaning your head onto his shoulderâyou often had to stop yourself especially in front of your friends and his teammates
you were good at keep secrets, but it was absolute hell not being able to even tell kuroo considering you always hung out with him too (it was a given obviously but you digress)
kuroo is a bit curious in his closest friendâs antics so his constant teases of how you and kenma would be such a cute couple annoyed you to your core
he laughs as if you and kenma being together would be absolutely impossible and wouldnât happen in a million years, and yet here you two were, pretending to laugh at his jokes and agreeing and it would be, in fact, impossible
as mentioned before, youâre more annoyed at keeping your relationship secret rather than angry
your actions were more abrupt and cold rather than your usual warm self and kenma definitely noticed
despite his usual calm and collected expression that he has on a daily basis, it covered up his own emotions of blatant insecurity and worry that you were losing your feelings and losing them quick
the last thing kenma wanted was for everything that happened between the two of you to be wasted over his own fear of being judged for being with you
you were his first in everything and he certainly wasnât going to let you become his first heartbreak either
he worried about this for a few days, overthinking while he played video games with kuroo, lev, and yaku that they noticed how quiet he was being over the call
it was then did he impulsively asked kuroo to go on a separate voice channel with him just so he could blurt out, âiâm dating (y/n).â
and to his surprise, all his best friend said was:Â âyeah, i know. (y/n) told me.â
âwhat? why?â kenma asked with confusion evident on his visage
âshe had no one else to go to vent.â kuroo answers, his amused laugh echoing through kenmaâs headphones. âdonât worry, i wonât tell anyone.â
âthanks, but... i think (y/n)âs angry at me and i donât know what to do.â
âshe told me that she was getting tired of keeping your relationship a secret. she asked me if you felt embarrassed or even ashamed of being with her.â he explained.
confusion and a bit of worry washed over kenma as his words suddenly faltered, âi could never be ashamed of being with her,â
âthen i guess, you should tell her that.â
âwhat should i do?â
his best friend lets on a smirk (not that kenma could even see it, anyway), âiâm so glad you asked.â
you werenât exactly sure what you expecting to be honest
you knew there was something going on between kenma and kuroo as if they were planning something intricate, but you werenât bothered to even ask
perhaps you were still in that petty mindset of giving kenma the cold shoulder after having to keep your relationship on hold all the time that stopped your curiosity
sure, it was a bit childish, but you were planning on talking about it with kenma the moment he came back into the classroom after going off somewhere with kuroo
which by the way, where the hell were they? lunch was ending soon and you needed to talk to you boyfriend asap
the timing was almost perfect the way the thought of him entered your mind was at the same time as his familiar blonde hair walked back into the classroom with a melon bun and a canned drink in his hand from the vending machineâyour favorites
âi noticed you didnât eat lunch, so i bought you this.â he says, placing them down onto your desk.
âis this supposed to be your way of apologizing to me or something?â you mused at him.
there was a faint smile on kenmaâs face when you did. this was your usual self, one that constantly smiled at him rather than deadpanned and cold. âno,â he simple put it. taking in a breath of confidence before pressing his lips on the corner of yours. âbut i was hoping that would.â
with wide eyes, your eyes scanned the room to see if anyone noticed, afraid at the fact that you broke the first rule. despite being a blushing mess from a minuscule peck on your cheek, there was an inkling of confusion still evident within you, âwhy did you do that?â
âkuroo told me everything.â
âi knew that guy couldnât keep a secret,â you mutter as you tried to ignore that infamous feeling of butterflies in the pit of your stomach. âi donât think people saw, so they wonât think weâre togetherââ
âwhat if i wanted people to know weâre together?â ded asf
â o. tooru
you honestly shouldâve known oikawa was going to keep this relationship between the two of you a secret since the moment he confessed his feelings to you
what else could you have expected from aoba johsaiâs most popular boy wonder with an actual fanclub full of naive girls
perhaps youâve become naive yourself considering you dealt with months of having your relationship constantly being swept under the rug, psyching yourself out that he was doing this for your sake
and you understood that
it was the reason why you even agreed to keep your relationship on the downlow considering how annoyingly notorious oikawaâs fangirls were, they wouldnât have let you see the light of day if they were to find out
if you were in fact being honest, there was a period in time near the beginning of the relationship how cautious you were beingâbarely talking to oikawa unless it had to do with school, avoiding his gazes during class, and even swallowing your pride by just watching his fangirls flirt with him and there was nothing you could do about it
you honestly had to give yourself a pat on the bat for dealing with six months of this treatment
you figured it wouldnât be that bad, especially after schools where you and oikawa could finally have alone time to yourselves, but even those times alone with him there was a lingering feeling of tension and unease
the thought of someone from school even finding out of you two being together even affected your relationship outside of school hours
you were tired of waiting outside the school gates for hours just for him to come out of volleyball practice and apologize that he couldnât walk you home yet again
you figured that oikawa had grown far to used to seeing you waiting for him all the time that it was practically common sense that he was going to reject you again and again
you had to stop waiting for him at some point, but there was an inkling inside that for once, just for once, he would look at you with a smile so sweet that he would finally go with you
but not once has it happened
was he really that afraid of people finding out of his relationship with you that heâs willing to disregard all your hard work to even make this thing (whatever is was) to even happen?
if you were truly being honest with yourself, the only reason why this relationship is still up and active for this long is all because of you
youâre the one always asking him when heâs available during the weekends so you two could finally see each other, youâre the one always texting him first, youâre the one always being the most understanding of the situation
and yet itâs almost like oikawa isnât even batting an eye at how difficult it has been for you
you absolutely hated jumping to conclusions and thinking of the worst case scenario and yet here you were, suddenly drowning at the possibility that the only reason why oikawa wanted a secret relationship was because he was ashamed to be with you
it was a thought that kept you up at night, tainting your optimistic thoughts of hope that this relationship would actually work out to decimate into thin air
the more is simmered in your head, the worse it becameâwhat if his feelings that he confessed to you was a lie?
you hated overthinking
but if you really thought about it, even before you and oikawa dated, neither of you two were close. just two acquaintances in the same class that occasionally shared answers with each other just by the convenience of sitting nearby
you even went as far as believing that him dating you was just a joke, that this whole goddamn relationship was just some mindless prank just because he was bored
six months of wasted time. you were over it
the next day at school, you didnât even look at him, you didnât smile or even acknowledge the way he said good morning to you (as a friend does)
you figured heâs probably too dense to even notice, but he did. the usual glow you had each morning when you said good morning back to him was gone
he already missed the way your gazes would meet and how he would constantly find himself lost in your irises, but now you couldnât even look at him in the eye
the only person whoâs aware that you and oikawa were dating was iwaizumi. it was a given as who else would oikawa ramble on and on and on about how pretty you looked or how smart you are if it wasnât his best friend?
if anything, iwa was the only guy oikawa could complain about how you were ignoring him
âmaybe sheâs bored of you for once,â iwaizumi cuts straight to the point. there was really no point in beating around the bush
offense was written all over oikawaâs face, utterly surprised, âhow could she?â
âyou canât keep your relationship with her a secret forever, you know.â his best friend goes on to explain, âwith the way things are going with you two acting like youâre nothing but acquaintances, (y/n)âs bound to lose her feelings.â
âbut i donât want her to lose feelings for me! and itâs not like i can suddenly tell all my fangirls that iâm dating someone, theyâll freak!â whines oikawa.
âwhy do you care about your fangirlsâ feelings more than your own girlfriend? seems to me, it doesnât even look like you care about (y/n) at all the way sheâs constantly waiting for you after practice only to be rejected.â
itâs obvious iwaizumi wasnât here to sugarcoat
âi just donât want them to harass (y/n)...â oikawa reasons, trying to ignore the way his heart drop at iwaâs words like a gripping poison
âthen thatâs your job to tell those girls to back off.â he suggests, âthey literally treat you like a god, surely theyâll listen if you tell them to leave her alone.â
the following day, you came across oikawa waiting outside your door, dressed in his uniform with his gaze lingering about to occupying his attention
âwhat are you doing here?â you ask him as you close your front door behind you. heâs probably here to break up with you, you thought to yourself
you had to force yourself to ignore the way your heart dropped at your own self-destructive thoughts
taking a deep breath as you approached him, you readied yourself for harsh news to come your way
but it never did
instead, you were greeted by oikawaâs infamous smile that made everyone at school to fall in love with this guy (including you)
he takes your hand into his, intertwining his calloused fingers that dwarfed yours in size. you donât remember the last time you held oikawaâs hand, but it felt so familiar and warm
it was like home
you couldnât help but feeling the ends of your lips tugging into a smile as you looked up at him, âwhat if someone at school sees us?â
you were expecting some kind of excuse, but all he did was shrug. âwho cares?â
â k. tetsurou
when you and kuroo started going out, you certainly wasnât expecting it to be like this
if anything, âgoing outâ would be a stretch if you count late night dates and sneaking out at midnight just to see each other as dating
it certainly wasnât your usual definition of dating either as you yearned greatly to be able to do normal couple things with your boyfriendâlike actually going out on dates during the day, eating lunch together, hell, even just holding hands!
it almost seemed laughable how normal things done in relationships were something you never even experienced with kuroo even after a few months of being together all due to him wanting to keep the relationship a secret
and if you were truly being honest with yourself, you never really understood why he wanted to keep it on the downlow in the first place
you never really questioned it as you just that much of an understanding person, but at a certain point it just wasnât adding up
it wasnât like he had girls going after him 24/7 despite being at the top of his class, popular, and nekomaâs volleyball captain
it wasnât like oikawa who had an actual problem with hoards of girls surrounding him and tracking his ever move, so what was the big deal of letting your relationship public?
it was then did it hit you
the suddenly downpour of insecurity within your own loving boyfriend that you trust so much was getting the best of you
âwhat if heâs embarrassed to even be with me?â you contemplated in a harsh whisper to your best friend
it was in the middle of lunch and you two were sitting alone on a bench in the schoolâs courtyard chatting while eatingâwell, more like overthinking in your case while you friend just sat there and nodded
âif he actually felt that way, then he wouldâve broken up with you already.â your friend stated in between bites, âbesides, if i didnât have feelings for someone, i wouldnât put in the effort to sneak out just to see them.â
you hummed, not sure what to say as she did have a point
but could you really blame yourself for wanting an actual relationship rather than one thatâs forced to go unnoticed?
âi should talk to kuroo about it...â you sigh out.
âtalk to me about what?â an oh-so-familiar voice calls out to you and your friend
kurooâs figure approaches the two of you as he give you a curt smile with hidden meanings that you werenât able to even notice. you were too caught up in your own meddling thoughts that you also didnât notice the way kuroo frowned slightly at the way you avoided eye contact with him
ânothing,â was all you said before standing up and throwing your trash away. âlunch is almost over so we should all get to class.â was all you said before briskly walking away
kurooâs brows furrow in confusion as he looks over to your friend, âwhatâs up with (y/n)?â
âshe thinks youâre too embarrassed to be with her, thatâs why you hide your relationship.â she cuts straight to the point (homegirl just wants to eat her lunch in peace ffs)
âwhat?â your boyfriend huffs out in shock, almost offended at the fact that you out of all people would believe such a thing. âwhy does she think that?â
your friends shrugs, ânot sure. thatâs something you should be asking her, but if it were me, i would want a normal relationship as well.â
kuroo doesnât say another word before walking away. and yet his walk quickened so he could catch up to you before you could get to class, footsteps echoing through the hallway in patters as he sees your familiar figure near your classroomÂ
â(y/n)!â he calls out to you as you slide the classroomâs door open. it was sure to catch the attention of the rest of the students already in the classroom as you turn towards him, brows furrowed in the same confusion
as he neared you, there was almost no sign in him stopping, sending your heart beating in a frenzy as you parted your lips to tell him to slow down
but before a single syllable could even fall from your lips, your boyfriendâs own pair press against yours harshly. it was sweet like caramel and you swore everything moved in a slow motion when you suddenly realized where you two were
he stole your breath away when he pulled apart from you, eyes immediately scanning the room of his own classmates staring at him in awe
âsince when were you two dating?â matsukawa asked rather loudly, it seemed that others were interested in knowing as well.
panic suddenly coursed through you as you gave kuroo a look, gravely ignoring the way yoru heart was thumping against your chest and the dozens of unanswered questions running through your head
âw-weâre not actually datiââ
âweâve been together for a few months actually.â kuroo cuts you off, sending you a wink before entering the classroom
#haikyuu!!#haikyuu#haikyuu imagines#haikyuu scenarios#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu angst#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu hcs#miya atsumu#atsumu x reader#atsumu angst#atsumu headcanons#kozume kenma#kenma x reader#kenma angst#kenma headcanons#oikawa tooru#oikawa x reader#oikawa angst#oikawa headcanons#kuroo tetsurou#kuroo x reader#kuroo angst#kuroo headcanons
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Our Song (Alyssa Naeher x Reader)
Request:Â alyssa naehex reader thats set during quarantine w/ âShyâ by Alexander Stewart. I just kind of think itâs cute since sheâs an introvert and that it would be fitting
Authorâs Note: Speical Thanks To @literaryhedgehogâ
Alyssa knew she should just say it, that admitting it out loud would finally put an end to this madness. She ran a soothing hand through your hair when you sniffled loudly into her chest.Â
God, she should just tell you how she felt. But, she also didnât want to overstep. That would make being roommates really awkward. Especially since neither of you were supposed to leave the apartment right now except for essential purchases. And she didnât want to lose her best friend. That would really suck.Â
But she wasnât afraid to say what no one else would- you had a terrible taste when it came to partners. You chose people who didnât value you, and you always ended up hurt.Â
This time was no different, well, it was slightly different considering you couldnât leave your shared apartment to cope like you normally would. Alyssa didnât know if that was better or worse, considering that you had adapted your breakup routine to just be endless cuddles with her and your favorite stuffed animal. Â
She had already spent the last hour making comforting noises. You had stopped shedding tears 15 minutes ago, so Alyssa decided it was time to go for some humor. âHey, so now you and Taylor Swift have something in common!â
âHmmâ You hummed in acknowledgment, your eyes never leaving where Supergirl was playing on screen.Â
âWell, she was broken up with over text. You were broken up with over text. I think this is the perfect opportunity to listen to her re-recording of Fearless, and really channel those emotions!â
âNo, Joe broke up with her in a 27-second phone call,â You lifted your head up off of her very comfortable chest to raise your eyebrow at the woman.Â
Alyssa was a great keeper, and amazing at crosswords, but she always needed your help when it came to Taylor trivia.Â
âThen Joe showed more consideration as an 18-year-old child than your 32 year old wanna be soccer star. It doesnât change the fact that I think listening to Mr Perfectly Fine would be cathartic.âÂ
âItâs kinda funny that she wrote Forever and Always, Mr. Perfectly fine, Better than Revenge and Holy Ground all about the same guy, theyâre all so different from each other,â You mumbled, settling back down on her chest. At least she didnât say that you had as many breakups as she did. That was a rude joke. (One Alyssa wouldnât dare make. She was more cultured than the media asshats that chased your team around).Â
âWomanâs efficient,â Alyssa shrugged. âNo reason why you can't recycle the same emotion into a different song genre.âÂ
âAt least she could make millions off her pain. All I seem to be able to do is kick the ball harder,â You grumbled. Your landlord complained about you practicing in the street because of how hard you sent the ball careening into his precious brick wall. It wasnât your fault Alyssa was too slow to stop the PK.Â
âDarling, considering youâre one of the strongest kickers on the east coast, Iâd say that pain is going to a worthwhile cause. But you do kind of have the worst taste in relationships.âÂ
âHey! Savannah wasnât a bad choice, just bad timing,â You huffed indignantly.Â
âSo that would be one out ofâŚ. How many bad relationships?âÂ
âAt least one for every Taylor Swift album,âÂ
âOkay, hereâs a fun idea, choose an ex for each album,â Alyssa said brightly. Thinking about music would definitely cheer you up. âWannabe soccer star is obviously your Joe, so represents the Fearless album. Which relationship is your⌠Drew?â
âYou already know the answer to that question,â you said, already picking up your phone to add Teardrops on my Guitar to the music queue. You then quickly added Forever and Always and started scrolling through Speak Now for the next song inspiration.Â
Alyssa nodded. It was a well-known fact that you had a massive crush on one Hope Solo growing up, and you had been absolutely enamored with her the second you set foot into camp. But Alyssa also knew that Hope was very faithful to a certain veteran.Â
The veteran keeper had tried to let you down easy, and Kelley was still one of your best friends, but it had hurt in the moment.
âKristie was my Haunted,â you said, smiling slightly. Dating her felt like a whirlwind, one that took your breath until you never thought it would end. She made butterflies flutter in your stomach, and you were so desperate to say the right thing, to be the perfect partner, that you always felt like you were walking a tightrope. Floating on air, but desperate to keep your balance. âAt least she had the decency to wait until we were in the same city to end it.âÂ
âArenât the two of you friends now?â Alyssa looked down at you, watching as you scrolled through songs from your comfortable place on her chest.Â
You nodded with a small smile. âHmm, we are much better off that way anyway.âÂ
âI bet you I can guess who your We are Never Ever Getting Back Together person is,â Alyssa trilled, reaching down to take the phone.Â
You playfully snatched it away from her. âWhoâs to say I wasnât going to choose I knew you were trouble?â You raised your eyebrow at the woman, who simply smirked in response.Â
âI can tell you who that is too if you like,â Alyssa reached for her own phone and took over control of the speakers, adding both songs to the music queue.Â
âAlright, Iâll bite. Who?âÂ
âYou definitely knew Sam Kerr was trouble, and I think it took you 4 breakups with Leah to finally call it quits,âÂ
âI was going to say Leah for 1989, it took me forever to realize how fucked up our relationship was after we finally broke up,âÂ
âIâm sure the distance didnât help.â With her in London and you in Chicago things just kind of fell apart.Â
âMaybe,â you hummed, noncommittally.Â
âOkay, so for Reputation. Iâm thinking Donât Blame Me,âÂ
âYou did go a bit crazy for JaneâŚâ Alyssa said with a roll of her eyes. You had almost moved to Houston for that girl, thank god you didnât. You sunburned like nobody's business.Â
âOh come on. You just didnât like the idea of me moving. And considering how long we had been dating at that point it did make sense!â You argued.Â
âIt was 3 months Y/n,â She deadpanned.Â
âI was in a wlw relationship. Thatâs like practically three years, itâs not like I brought a u-haul to our first date.âÂ
Alyssa quirked an eyebrow up at you. âDidnât you have one of those the first time we met?âÂ
âYeah, because I wasnât moving into my college apartment without any furniture!â
âWhatever you say, babe. Who's your Folklore?â She rolled her eyes goodnaturedly.Â
âI think you skipped an album,â you said. This was weird because Lover was one of Alyssaâs favorite albums. âBut, since you asked. I think Kelley is The 1.âÂ
âAh, our favorite squirrel,â Alyssaâs lips ticked up. You and Kelley had dated in college (something that should have made her jealous), but Kelley was the one pushing her to admit her feelings now.Â
âWe were just too young and dumb,â you said, smiling. âWe had a great time together, and it would have been fun if it worked out. But at some point we just realized, we were friends, but there wasnât anything romantic there.â
âIâm sorry it didnât work out,â Alyssa said, like a liar.Â
âIâm not. Her and Emily are like made for each other,â You snorted with the shake of your head. âAnd at least she wasnât afraid of the world knowing we were together,âÂ
âWell, yeah,â Alyssa smiled. She had loved seeing the way being publicly out with Kelley had brought out the best of you. â Okay moving on! Next, we need to narrow down your No body, No Crime.âÂ
âI take offense. Alex is still alive, so that doesnât count,â You huffed.Â
âIâm kidding! Iâm kidding. I know you didnât kill any of your significant others,â Alyssa said, laughing. âThough if you listened to the song you would know thatâs my job⌠â
âAlex was my Champagne Problems,â You mumbled sadly. That relationship had been the hardest for you, as had the breakup. She was terrified of the world even suspecting she wasnât straight.Â
You had everything, except the freedom to be yourself, and In the end, you couldnât take the hiding anymore.Â
âYou did your best, love. But people come out at their own pace. And it was before Obergfell v. Hodges was decided. Being queer was still more likely to be presented as a scandal in the media then.â
âShe cheated on me with Serv. She doesnât get a pass,â You grumbled, crossing your arms.Â
âIâm pretty sure you were on a break dear,â Alyssa said, though she was inclined to agree with you. Being on a âbreakâ but not officially breaking up didnât seem like a reason to start dating other people. Still getting over some of the semantics might theoretically help you move on. âBUT maybe we should move on. Who is your Lover?â
Your eyes squinted thoughtfully, a light pink shading your cheeks. âThe only person who hasnât ever left me is you. You let me leave the Christmas lights up until May and dance around the kitchen when you cook.âÂ
Alyssa looked away, not able to meet your eyes. âI mean, the lights can change color, so they can be thematic all year. And youâre the one who chooses the music to listen to while I cook. I canât help it if theyâre all great for dancing.â
âYou can dance to anything. Iâm pretty sure you turned a Hosier song into a salsa dance last week.â You giggled.Â
âThe only person I dance with is you, Y/n,â Alyssa said, finally meeting your eyes. She could feel her body start shaking slightly, as the adrenaline kicked in. She was going to do it. She was going to tell you. âI donât want to dance if Iâm not dancing with you.âÂ
âIâd dance with you in a storm in my best dress,âÂ
âI have tried so hard to be supportive about your last several relationships. But seeing you dancing to your favorite song with anyone else⌠Iâve loved you for three years now and I couldnât bear it.âÂ
The air was suddenly charged between you, and you realized your faces were just inches apart. It was hard to breathe. You never dreamed your best friend would return your feelings (maybe thatâs why you had so many bad relationships).Â
âKiss me,â you breathed, slowly moving around so your heads were at the same level.Â
âThatâs not a Taylor swift Lyric,â Alyssa said. In her brain, there was a loading sign currently whirring in little circles, as she attempted to process what you just said. Did you mean what she thought you said?
âBaby just say yes,â You said, feeling so happy that tears were coming to your eyes. You leaned forward getting inches from her face, so close you could feel her breath hitch. âPlease kiss me.â
âYes,â was all Alyssa had time to say before she closed the distance and kissed you.Â
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The Problem with Perfection Chapter 10 spoilers!
Hey all! So, a couple people asked for this, so I figured Iâd post it. Itâs chapter 8 of the companion to TPWP, The Problem with Mondo, which corresponds with chapter 10 of TPWP. Yes, this confuses me a lot too, the fact that the chapters donât align. -.-
Anyway! Donât read this if youâve not read TPWP chapter 10, since it will definitely spoil that chapter, ha. Warning for an overabundance of foul language and some sexualized thinking, as well as an absent thought of suicide, same as in TPWP. This chapter is super long, about 20,000 words, and Iâm posting all of it because... why not, am I right? Ha.
I did cut a few sentences from this chapter because they might spoil things for later chapters of TPWP, but they donât really contain anything major.
The chapter is below the cut! Hope yâall like. :-)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mondo is angry. Blindingly angry. So angry he doesnât know why heâs angry, but honestly, what else is new? He just knows that heâs angry and the reason he is angry is that goddamn motherfucking kid and his goddamn motherfucking glasses-
 âThey! Are!! Glasses!!! Just!!! Wear them!!!â the boy grits out, thrusting his goddamn hand out towards Mondo, looking like he is about five fucking seconds from bashing his head against the goddamn wall. Mondo almost wishes he fucking would, to save him the fucking trouble! Unable to help himself, he scowls and crosses his arms, shaking his head firmly, so fucking pissed it ainât even funny.Â
 âNo! I ainât no fuckinâ nerd!â Mondo yells back, glaring like he was born to do it. Unfortunately, it seems so was Ishimaru, as the kid is glaring like his life depends on it, as fiery and beautiful passionate as ever. That goddamn motherfucking...Â
 âJust! Wear them! The doctor says you need them! You donât have to wear them all the time! Just when youâre reading! Stop! Being an idiot!â
 âMe?! I ainât no fuckinâ idiot, youâre a fuckinâ idiot! If ya think Iâm gonna wear that shit, yer outta yer goddamn mind! Now get that shit outta my face, ya fuckwad, or Iâm gonna bash yer head in!âÂ
 âLike heck you will! Youâre all bark and no bite, Owada! Now just! Wear! The! Glasses! You said you were okay with them when you bought them! I will force you to wear them, donât think I wonât!âÂ
 âOh, you motherfuckinâ-!â
 âU-uh, g-guys?â
 Mondo and Ishimaru turn, as one, to glare at the intruder on their private fucking conversation. Okay, so maybe theyâre in the middle of the hallway outside their dorm rooms, but fuck! That donât mean shit! Eavesdropping is a nasty fucking habit and if this goddamn motherfucker doesnât butt the fuck out right the fuck now-Â
 âShut up!â the pair shouts in unison, before turning to glare at each other again.Â
 Mondo doesnât know why heâs so angry. He doesnât know why heâs doing this, or why he has been doing this for the past week and a half. From hot, to cold, to hot, to cold, again and again and again, never fucking ceasing. One minute heâs fine, relaxed as shit and not at all angry, maybe even feeling kinda good, and then the next...
 And he doesnât know why. Why heâs doing this. Why heâs fucking ruining this shit, like he fucking ruins every fucking thing. He... h-he just...Â
 Things had been okay, you know? Between him and Ishimaru. At first. Sure, they werenât really friends, evidenced by how they are still referring to one another by last name, but theyâd been friendly enough. Mondo had taken care to keep his anger in check, andâ to his surpriseâ it... it hadnât actually been that hard. It seems that Ishimaru can be pretty fucking cool when theyâre not at odds.Â
 Heâs also a great fucking tutor. He somehow manages to not sound sanctimonious and pretentious when explaining shit, instead looking so fucking earnest and like he genuinely wants to just... help.Â
 Because of that, theyâd gotten along pretty well those first few days. Ishimaru had been determined to get him brought up to speed before they started the fucking novel, so heâd taken care to spend a couple hours a day hanging around Mondo, at various times. The pair usually spent an hour or so in the library after class ended, but more than that, they just... they would walk together between classes, Ishimaru rambling on and on about what theyâd just learned about in class. Mondo doesnât know why heâd allowed it, usually not caring about shit like that, but somehow... somehow, it had been nice. Hearing Ishimaru talk about the shit theyâd learned, the kid better able to impart knowledge in the ten fucking minutes they had between classes than the teachers were able to in the hour plus they had. Itâs not at all the sorta shit Mondo would have expected himself to enjoy, let alone look forward to, but shit. There they were.Â
 But then... Mondo got stupid. He overstepped his bounds and got fucking scared, fuck.Â
 Theyâd been in Ishimaruâs room. Mondo doesnât know why heâd made the offer to go to the kidâs room rather than the library, like they usually did, like was safe, but he... he had. And the kid had fucking accepted, and so there they were, sitting on the hall monitorâs fucking couch, sitting too fucking close. The kid was reading the short story Teach had assigned to the class, the pair realizing it was just... easier, while Mondo waited for the nurse to contact the eye doctor for him, since it turned out that yeah, his eyes were kinda fucked up, shit.Â
 He had felt so fucking weird inside, the first time the kid had read to him, since theyâd been in the library and heâd been nervous someone would see them and think Mondo was an idiot who needed to be fucking read to, but... shit. This time it had just been... different. Without the fear of being judged (since Ishimaru never fucking judged him, not ever, god fucking damn), he... heâd been able to listen to the kid reading without any fucking reservations. And heâd had to admit that- that he... he liked it. A lot. Like... fucking a lot.Â
 So fucking much that it had made him feel relaxed for the first time... shit. Prolly ever. Ishimaru just had a nice sounding voice, ya know? It was strangely deep, at times, when he got lost in the story, his words not too fast but not too slow. He actually emoted when he spoke, too, the sound not a dull and dry monotone like so many fucking other people heâs heard read before. It just... made him feel so fucking calm inside, like the monster inside of him had been fucking purring.Â
 And... and then...
 Mondo had let his head drop down onto Ishimaruâs shoulder, eyes closing in contentment, the kid faltering for one split second, breath hitched, before heâd smoothly continued, like it had never happened. And with his eyes closed and his head resting on a warm, comfortable shoulder, hearing that wonderful cadence from that wonderful, beautiful mouth... he hadnât been able to stop the thought. And the thought he had was...Â
 God, his voice is so fucking nice, isnât it...? Wonder what it would sound like screaming your name as you pound the fuck outta him. Heâd prolly be loud as shit, so fucking passionate, clawing you to all hell, but damn if youâd mind. Shit... wouldnât that be fucking nice...
 He had been, to put it mildly, freaked the fuck out.Â
 His eyes had shot open the second the thought had crossed his mind, heart fucking pounding as he wondered where the goddamn fuck that shit came from. Ishimaru had been startled, looking at him with his wide fucking eyes, lips opened softly in shock, voice faltering for the first time and Mondo... Mondo couldnât fucking handle it, holy fucking shit.Â
 Heâd immediately stood and stammered out some bullshit about needing to check on his hog, before fucking bailing, eyes wide and heart an absolute mess. He had, indeed, gone out to his hog and rode around for a bit, not wanting to think, but heâd been unable to help it. To stop it. And it... it made him feel...
 Heâs not gay. Okay? Heâs fucking not. Thereâd be no fucking problem if he were, but he just ainât. He likes chicks, something he knows better than anything else, something heâs known since he was a fucking kid, goddamn. Heâd even made sure to look at his porno mags that night, reassured when he felt his dick harden so fucking hard as he saw the tits and pussy that always made him so fucking hard to see.Â
 So, he wasnât gay. He fucking couldnât be gay, and itâs not possible for him to like both, so he figured that the thought had meant... meant Mondo wanted to fucking pound Ishimaruâs head in, not- n-not any other meaning of the word that it could have meant. He guessed that he didnât like being around Ishimaru as much as he had assumed and that he actually hated him, after all.Â
 As freaked out as heâd been, he took hold of that idea and fucking ran with it. He told himself that he hated the kid, of course he hated him, his voice was fucking annoying as shit, not nice, not nice at all!Â
 And so, the next day, heâd been cold to the kid. So fucking cold. And when the kid had tried to approach him after home room ended, looking open and earnest and so fucking cute-
 Mondo hadnât been able to handle it. His stomach had clenched, and his heart had fucking lurched, and he told himself it was hatred he felt, it had to be fucking hatred. And so, heâd snarled at the kid, telling him to âget the fuck away from me, freak!â before heâd run off, heart aching so fucking stupidly.Â
 He had considered skipping class, getting on his hog and fucking booking it, but he needed to give his girl a break, and he still kinda wanted to try the whole âgiving school a chanceâ thing, so heâd eventually decided to storm into class, even if heâd been five minutes late. Heâd refused to look at Ishimaru, though, thinking that seeing his stupid fucking pathetic face would fucking destroy him infuriate the shit out of him, and as soon as class ended, heâd shot out, not needing to pack anything up since heâd not fucking brought anything, shit.Â
 That had kept happening the rest of the day. Every class they had together (which was pretty much every fucking class, god fucking damn this school) Mondo would carefully keep his eyes off the kid, ignoring the feel of sad, hurt, bright red eyes as they bored into him. After the second class, the kid had tried to chase after him, tried to talk to him, but Mondo would fucking turn and head the opposite fucking direction of their next class, and he knew the kid wouldnât dare risk being late, so heâd give up pretty quick. Heâd constantly be looking in class, though, lips pulled down in a frown, eyebrows furrowed in concern. Not that Mondo was fucking looking! Shit!Â
 It wasnât until Ishimaru had cornered him outside his dorm room that night, looking so fucking hurt and upset and not a little bit annoyed that theyâd managed to resolve things.Â
 In that Ishimaru had been so fucking annoying that Mondo had immediately started yelling, causing Ishimaru to yell back, his words bleeding hurt, making Mondo feel like absolute scum. They had been loud enough to garner the attention of most of their classmates, even fucking Togami gracing them with his condescending presence, which had made Mondo even more pissed, honestly, wanting nothing more than to be anywhere fucking else.
 It was when the kid looked about ready to fucking cry that Mondo had had enough. His insides were squirming, and he felt so fucking scared, for reasons he still doesnât understand, but he... h-he hadnât wanted to make Ishimaru cry again. After spending several days interacting with Ishimaru, having a lot of fucking conversations that hadnât actually ended in the kidâs tears, he... he hadnât wanted to go back to that.Â
 And so, with all the confused fucking emotions swirling inside him, heâd yelled âfuckinâ fine, ya goddamn bastard! Iâll fuckinâ meet you and do that goddamn fuckinâ assignment tomorrow! Now leave me the fuck alone!â before storming into his room and slamming the door shut so loud it made even his ears ring.Â
 Heâd then promptly stormed into the shower, turning the water on as hot as it could go, the water fucking hurting, but heâd wanted it to. He just... heâd felt so... so...
 Confused...
 Heâd never felt this way for anyone before. So angry and scared and confused and yet also so fucking happy, so bizarrely, stupidly happy. Ishimaru fucking... he made him happy. And he didnât know how to handle that, because clearly, he still hated the kid... right? Right? What other option was there? Why did he want to hit Ishimaru (and he had to want to hit him, it was the only fucking option that made any fucking sense) if he didnât hate him?Â
 But heâd agreedâ stupidlyâ to meet with the kid for another fucking tutoring session after class the next day. And while the thought had made his insides squirm, he... fuck. He hadnât wanted to make the kid cry again. God, did he not want that. Even if he did hate himâ which he must, he mustâ he... fuck.Â
 He couldnât make him cry.Â
 He wasnât his goddamn old man.
 And so, when he got out of the shower, heâd resolved to contain his anger the next day. Heâd push it down, keep it locked up tight tight tight, and he wouldnât let it hurt Ishimaru. Heâd gotten into bed (still hated it, but he was slowly getting use to the ridiculously plush material) and fallen into a fitful sleep, dreams full of wide, hurt red eyes, a sad voice begging him to explain why he was hurting him so. Heâd woken an hour early with a start, heart pounding, and had spent the remaining time until he usually got up doing push-ups again and again and again, until he didnât remember the dream anymore.Â
 And then, when he went into class, carrying his supplies for once... heâd given the kid a small, sheepish smile, stomach roiling with all the emotions within it. Heâd then spent the rest of home room doodling absently on the notebook Ishimaru had helped him pick out from the school store, doing his best to not think of everything and psych himself out. Heâd even managed to feel almost calm as he let himself draw, something he rarely allows himself to do, but always has kinda enjoyed, even if heâs shit at it.
 Once home room ended, heâd waited for Ishimaru at the door, telling him as casually as he could that the nurse had contacted him the day before, saying sheâd scheduled an eye doctor (he still canât remember the official name Ishimaru called the dude, shit) appointment for 3:00 the next day, hesitantly asking the kid if he had wanted to come along. He could tell that the kid was taken aback, clearly not having expected such a thing, but heâd still stammered out an acceptance, looking so flustered it wasnât funny when Mondo turned to look at him with a small, soft smile. Heâd not meant to look at the kid like that, but heâd just... been unable to help it.Â
 The rest of the day had gone well, the tutoring session going nicely like it had before that stupid fucking bullshit two days prior. It had happened in the library again, which Mondo figured would be safer. Heâd almost started to hope that things would stay that way, stay as calm and easy and nice, but then-
 Mondo got angry. Again.Â
 He doesnât even know why, he never fucking does, but the kid had just... heâd been so fucking patient, helping Mondo pick out a pair of âreading glasses,â since the doc had said he had pretty bad close-up vision and would be benefited from having prescription reading glasses, not just the over-the-counter stuff you find at drug stores. Mondo had felt so fucking lost, no idea what any of the bullshit meant, but Ishimaru had... heâd been so fucking helpful, explaining the complicated terminology and shit, helping him find a pair that didnât make him look too much like a fucking nerd. And the pair he settled on was honestly kinda nice. It was a rectangular silver metal frame that had deep purple plastic on the sides, and it actually make him look kinda cool... if a bit nerdy. Heâd given the salesperson his school insurance card and was pleasantly surprised to find heâd not have to pay a penny for the frames, since the school covers shit like that.Â
 It was then, as he and Ishimaru exited the shop and the kid absently commented that the glasses made him look very smart that Mondo just... fucking lost it.Â
 And he doesnât even know why.
 It just... it made him feel weird inside. Being around the kid. Being soft with him. And he was. Soft. Soft and kind and fucking gentle. And the kid was the exact same back. The entire time theyâd been in the shop, Mondo had been thinking how nice it had felt. How domestic. The panic and fear had been slowly rising in him the entire time theyâd been in the store, and heâd done all he could to push it the fuck down, but he... he hadnât...
 Heâd left the kid standing there, looking so fucking confused, as he hopped on his hog and drove away. Heâd not cared how the kid would get back to the school, he had refused to ride with Mondo since it made him ânervousâ anyway, so it wasnât his fucking problem.
 And that pattern just... kept repeating. Mondo would get angry, say something toxic to the kid, and storm away. The kid would wait a couple of hours, maybe try and talk with him after class or something, only to eventually corner him and force him to talk to him, looking so fucking fed up, but also so fucking upset and sad and confused. Like he didnât know why Mondo was doing this to him. Like he didnât know why Mondo was being so fucking difficult. Like he... he didnât...
 Didnât know why he fucking bothered...
 And⌠honestly? Mondo didnât know why either. Why he kept trying. Why he was so stubborn, always chasing after Mondo even after Mondo fucking shoved him away, sometimes literally. Even when Mondo would get so fucking nasty, making tears build up in the kidâs eyes, frustration clear in his every movement.Â
 For almost two weeks this occurred, again and again and again, and Mondo... Mondo doesnât know why the kid doesnât just leave him already. Why he doesnât just say âthe hell with it,â realize Mondo isnât fucking worth it, and leave his ass. Like every other person on the face of this goddamn planet...Â
 Itâs only a matter of time until he does, though. Leave him. Itâs what always was going to happen, since Mondo couldnât ever hope to hold onto someone so very, very good. So very, very nice. Mondo is poison. Heâs gas. He only knows how to destroy and break and hurt.Â
 Heâs not allowed something nice.Â
 Heâs not allowed someone nice.Â
 Heâs just...
 Not worthy of it.Â
 Case in fucking point...
 âLook. Owada-kun,â Ishimaru spits, hands clenched around the stupid glasses case that he for some reason has (Mondo doesnât even know how heâd gotten a hold of them, shit), looking like he wants to crush them, shit. âI donât understand why youâre being so stubborn about this! You picked them out! You said they were fine! Why! Why have you changed your mind!â
 Mondo scowls at the words, heart racing and swirling and hurting, hurting, hurting, and he doesnât wanna be doing this, wants to stop, but he canât, he canât, he fucking canât! He doesnât know how to stop this, doesnât know how to make this go away, all he knows how to do is break and hurt and destroy, destroy, destroy-
 âI ainât changed shit! I never fuckinâ agreed ta wear fuckinâ glasses, now get the fuck outta my face!âÂ
 Itâs a lie. They both know itâs a lie, he can see the anger rising on Ishimaruâs face as he processes the abject lie. Mondo had, in fact, agreed on the glasses, had even kinda liked them, but he canât concede that, canât say he does, if he does then- then that means heâs okay with this, this weird thing he has going on with Ishimaru, and he doesnât know if he can handle that, handle the proof that Ishimaru is so fucking amazing, the proof that Mondo doesnât fucking deserve him, proof that... t-that he...Â
 Mondo canât take it. He canât fucking take it! He tries to leave, to get away, to fucking end this shit already, but then Ishimaru is grabbing hold of him, holding so fucking tight, and Mondo tries to break free, tries to get away, but the kid just doesnât fucking let go, and Mondo is so fucking freaked out, he just wants to leave, please god, let him just leave, donât let him break this fucking kid again, god, please-Â
 âYou-! You are the most infuriating, pig-headed, arrogant... jerk I have ever had the misfortune to meet! If I never saw your face again, it wouldnât be long enough!â
 âOh, Iâm so wounded, please donât call me anymore fuckinâ names like that, how the fuck am I ever gonna recover?!â Mondo snarls, sarcasm so thick heâs sure even Ishimaru will be able to pick up on it, wanting to stop but not being able to. âGrow the fuck up, ya cock suckinâ assfucker! Learn some better fuckinâ insults or donât even bother tryinâ ta play!â
 âJust because I am too sophisticated to resort to such foul language does not mean anything! You may be a lowly, classless heathen, but I, for one, refuse-â
 âOh, so now ya think yer fuckinâ better than me?! I told ya already, yâainât goddamn shit, Ishimaru! Ainât no shit at all!â
 âI am one hundred times the man you will ever hope to be! And if Iâm not... feces, then youâre not even worth anything at all! Y-youâre... youâre an amoeba, so tiny and insignificant that itâs a miracle you think youâre relevant at all!â
 âWhat the fuck did ya call me, ya son ofa bitch?!â
 Mondo sees the kid open his mouthâ likely to fire something back, barely any space between themâ holding onto Mondoâs arm so fucking tight, like his life depends on it or something, looking so fucking pissed and angry and hurt and fucking beautiful, so fucking beautiful, god fucking damnit-
 But before the kid can say anything, another voice pipes up, the same voice as earlier, making Mondoâs rage reach a paramount, oh god-
 âAw, come on! I thought you guys resolved things already, do you really have to do this?! Please!âÂ
 Mondo turns to the fucking eavesdropper, snarling at the beyond fucking average boy. Naegi turns super fucking pale at the look, but he doesnât cower away for once. Mondo doesnât care. Heâs far passed the point of caring.Â
 âI told ya ta stay the fuck outta this!âÂ
 Naegi frowns, but Mondo doesnât give him a chance to say any other stupid ass thing before heâs turning back to Ishimaru, eyes practically spitting fire as he stares so deep into Ishimaruâs that it feels almost like a physical embrace. It makes Mondoâs breath hitch for some stupid fucking reason, his stomach swirling as he looks deep into the most gorgeous fucking eyes heâs ever fucking seen-
 But he canât feel things like that, so he pushes it firmly away.Â
 He can hear their eavesdropper fucking sigh, soft and almost disappointed, and that should make Mondo even angrier, but something in Mondo is feeling so fucking weird now. G-god... he doesnât even know how to begin to describe it, other than it feels like heâs on fire, but not even in a bad way. Ishimaru is staring at him, eyes wide, anger in them, but also something else, something Mondo canât understand, no matter how much he fucking wants to.Â
 He canât let this end here. He wants to let it end, but he fucking canât. He... h-he needs to figure out how to settle this, how to make this stop, how to not be as fucking pathetic as he knows he is. He... he needs to prove that heâs not as worthless as they both know he is, as weak, as nothing, so fucking nothing. Everyone knows it, knows he doesnât belong here, knows that Ishimaru is so much better than him itâs not funny, but he- he needs to prove that he has something going for him, that he... he can do something, even if heâs worthless in every other regard, every other aspect, even if Ishimaru is better than him everywhere else he just needs to prove he can beat him at fucking something, god-
 Heâs issuing the challenge before he can stop himself.Â
 And god, is he so fucking afraid.Â
 âYou think yer so perfect, donât ya, Ishimaru? Think yer better than me? Well... well, yer not, anâ I can fuckinâ prove it. I bet I can beat you, hands down, any day of the fuckinâ week. Yâainât better than me, ya shit fuck. Yâainât nothinâ,â Mondo hisses, lying through his fucking teeth. Ishimaru is better than him. He knows it. Heâs always known it. He hates it, though. Not being good enough. Not being worthy. He... he wants to be. Good enough. For... f-for...Â
 Ishimaruâs eyes are shiny again, even despite his glare.Â
 Typical.Â
 âWhat?! Y-you guys arenât going to- to fight, are you? Guys-!â
 Mondo breaks his stare down with Ishimaru to shoot that goddamn fucking bastard a single, solitary sneer, before turning back to Ishimaru, chest heaving with all the emotions he carries within him.Â
 âNah. Ground floor, thereâs a sauna. Ya know it?âÂ
 Ishimaru blinks slowly, sluggish, before nodding slightly, looking very fucking confused. His eyebrows are furrowed, and his lips are pulled down, and he looks so fucking cute stupid, god. After a moment, though, it seems he understands what Mondo is getting at, the challenge he is suggesting, as his face lights up, eyes bright and passionate once more, an honest to god grin on his face.Â
 Holy fucking shit...Â
 âAha! A simple endurance challenge! If that is your gauntlet, then I happily accept! I will wipe the floor with you!âÂ
 Despite the anger that is still flowing through him, Mondo canât help the small smile that passes on his lips, something about the enthusiasm so fucking... not cute, not cute, not cute at all, but maybe, a little, teeny tiny bit... endearing? He pushes it away, though. Itâs not helpful, here.Â
 âYer fuckinâ on. And you,â Mondo points blindly to Naegiâ who âeepsâ at the gesture, fucking coward he isâ not able to look away from Ishimaru for a single fucking second, âwill be our witness. Got it?!âÂ
 As intently as Mondo is staring at Ishimaru, he doesnât see the other kidâs response, but he can hear how Naegi splutters, the kid clearly not as enthusiastic about the idea as Ishimaru and himself are. Bastard.Â
 âW-what?! Now?! B-but itâs so late... g-guys, are you sure this is a- a good idea-?!â
 âYes, ya fuckinâ moron, itâs a fuckinâ great idea!â Mondo snarls, at the exact same time Ishimaruâ eyes bright and feverishâ exclaims, âyes! It is an excellent idea!âÂ
 Uncomfortable at their agreement, Mondo finally tears his eyes away, ignoring the churning feeling in his chest as he storms down the hall to where the bathhouse is, mere meters away. Ishimaru stares after him for a stunned second, but quickly spurs himself into motion, using his long-ish legs to catch up quick, head held high as they march determinedly on. God... heâs so fucking...
 Shit.Â
 When they reach the bathhouse a few moments later, Mondo firmly pushes aside the rational voice inside him that is screaming at him not to do this. He knows his limits when it comes to endurance. While heâs not the best at running, he has great endurance for other things, especially pain and discomfort. (This sentence was removed due to ~~spoilers~~)Â
 But Ishimaru... fuck. Heâs so fucking passionate, so fucking determined, but who knows what his endurance is like? If heâll be able to keep up? And it shouldnât matter, shouldnât give Mondo pause, but he... he canât help the stab of concern that fills him as they enter the room, Mondo grabbing a âclosed for repairsâ sign and putting it in front of the entrance, not wanting anyone to interrupt.Â
 He hates the feeling and pushes it away as he turns to glare at Ishimaru, pointing a finger, not wanting to deal with such weakness, but he... he canât quite manage to force it fully away...Â
 Shit.Â
 âAlright, hereâs the fuckinâ terms. First ta tap out is a fuckinâ bitch ass loser who ainât worth shit. The one who lasts the longest is the official winner. We ainât allowed ta touch the other or do anythinâ ta them directly, this is strictly an endurance challenge. Oh, anâ weâre gonna do this fully clothed. What do ya say?!âÂ
 Mondo sees Ishimaruâs eyes widen when he gets to the last term, the kid fucking shaking his head sharply in denial. Fuck. Fuck. Shit. Heâd added that last clause in last minute, realizing as he detailed the rules that they were gonna be fucking half fucking naked in there, and his mind had shorted the fuck out. Heâs been in saunas fully clothed before, he knows he can handle it, but he isnât fucking sure he can handle sitting nearly nude beside Ishi-fucking-maru...
 But of course, the kid wouldnât fucking agree. Of fucking course...
 âI do not agree to that last term, but I agree to the rest!âÂ
 Glad his angry flush fully disguises the fucking embarrassed flush he can feel rising on his face, Mondo just nods tensely, sneering, as he storms over to the water cooler in the corner.Â
 âAlright, whatever, fucker. Ya got five minutes ta prepare. Then, weâre fuckinâ doinâ this shit.âÂ
 With that, Mondo grabs a paper cup and downs some water, feeling so impossibly tense. He can feel Ishimaru staring at him, mouth partially open, but he gets spurned into action when Naegi shifts awkwardly beside him, chasing the kid away to one of the lockers, where he... he fucking...
 Starts taking off his fucking clothes...
 Holy. Fucking. Shit.Â
 Mondo is staring. Mondo knows he shouldnât be staring, knows itâs wrong to be staring, but he canât fucking help it. His eyes are like magnets, drawn to the kid, watching as he takes off all of his fucking layers, folding each one so neatly and carefully as he sticks them in the small fucking locker. The kid hesitates a little when he gets to his fucking tighty-whities (of course the kid wears that shit, of fucking course), but ultimately, he doesnât take them off. Instead, he bites his lip and grabs a white towel, wrapping it firmly around his waist before putting the rest of his stuff away. Mondo firmly pushes down the stupid as shit rush of disappointment and tells himself to stop staring, to look away, but god, he fucking canât. Ishimaru, he...
 Heâs so fucking gorgeous, so fucking hot, so fucking sexy-
 Mondo feels himself heat the fuck up when Ishimaru turns abruptly and looks him straight in the eyes, looking fucking startled at something. Feeling strangely caught, Mondo looks away as quick as he can, pushing away the stupid as shit thoughts, marching over to a locker stiffly. Shit... heâs gotta fucking get laid one of these days. The tension is doing fucked up shit to his brain...Â
 He takes his time putting some of his more fragile shit away, like his crappy cellphone and his key card. He does, honestly, consider taking off his uniform, or at least taking off his duster, but he just... shit. Canât. Not with how strange he feels inside, his mindâs eye still stupidly forcing him to think of Ishimaru, his stupidly muscular back flexing with every move he made. It means nothing, fucking nothing, but he... shit. It prolly would be better to remain fully clothed, duster included, even if it does put him at a disadvantage. But ya know what, whatever. Doesnât matter. He knows his limits and knows that he can last longer in the sauna than Ishimaru, even when fully clothed. Shit...
 When the five minutes he gave them are up, he meets up with Ishimaru outside the entrance to the sauna, fully intending to slide it open and step inside, when-
 âOwada-kun, you cannot seriously be considering entering the sauna fully clothed! Itâs suicide!â Ishimaru exclaims, sounding fucking concerned as shit. His eyes are wide, and his brows are furrowed, and heâs biting his fucking lip, god fucking damn, and itâs messing with Mondoâs head so fucking much. Why... why the fuck would he care?! Huh?! Theyâre not fucking friends! Why would he care if Mondo did try and kill himself, huh?! World would fucking be better off for it, shit!Â
 Deciding to definitely not say that, Mondo just sneers at the kid, crossing his arms stubbornly.Â
 âJust âcuz yer a fuckinâ pansy ass bitch donât mean I am! Now, ya ready ta do this, or are ya a fuckinâ chicken?!â Â
 His face flushed, Ishimaru doesnât even bother to answer, instead just yanking open the door and entering the sauna with a stubborn tilt to his jaw.Â
 Staring after the kid for a split second (pushing down the disappointment that he didnât press the issue harder, proving to Mondo how fucking right he is), Mondo enters on Ishimaruâs heels, the heat not even bothering him one bit.Â
 Itâs nothing compared to the fire that constantly burns within him.Â
 Sliding the door shut behind him, leaving Naegi outside to do whatever the fuck he wants while the contest takes place, Mondo marches over to where Ishimaru is sitting, taking a seat an armâs length away. He can feel bright red eyes on him, but he determinedly pushes the feeling away, trading a few snide comments with the kid, not even feeling the heat really.Â
 About ten minutes in, Mondo will admit the heat is getting to him a little, a thin sheen of sweat making its way onto his skin, which is more uncomfortable than anything. Ishimaru looks a little woozy, so Mondo taunts that the kid should just give up now. Ishimaru just laughs, saying how he never gives up, ever. Fucking pretentious bastard.Â
 After half an hour, he can admit he is feeling kinda uncomfortable, the heat becoming somewhat unpleasant, but heâs still feeling pretty good, all things considered. Ishimaru looks flushed as all hell, though, his cheeks bright red and sweat clinging to his muscles. The kid tells himâ unpromptedâ that heâs doing fine, and Mondoâs brain feels too stupid to allow him to do much else than glare, shit...Â
 After around fifty minutes, the kid... he looks fucking awful. Mondo isnât doing too hot, the uncomfortable feeling spreading to be extremely uncomfortable, but he knows he can handle it. The kid, though... he looks like heâs starting to lose it. Ishimaru mentions absently that heâs starting to feel cold, which honestly concerns Mondo, since he knows that shit is a bad sign, but his head is too stupid to remember why, so he just says itâs prolly not good. The kid doesnât call it quits, though.Â
 Instead, he actually... talks... huh.Â
 âY-you can take off your uniform... if you w-want... I- I wonât judge...â the boy mumbles, sounding super fucking exhausted. Mondo tries to snort, but itâs a lot harder than it should be, shit.Â
 âN-nah... Iâm... Iâm... Iâm good,â Mondo finds himself muttering back, looking at the kid intensely, wondering why he isnât giving up when he so clearly feels sick. Mondo finds himself muttering about how red Ishimaruâs is, likening him to a hot spring monkey, of all things. The kid mumbles back about being born with a red face, which makes no fucking sense, but ya know what? Heâs too tired to waste energy on this shit. Heâs got a challenge to win.Â
 After what he figures is an hour and five minutes, the warning bell rings, telling them they have five minutes until curfew. Mondo figures the hall monitor will end this now, since he wouldnât dare stay out past curfew and risk breaking one of his âprecious rules,â but the kid doesnât seem to even notice the bell had rung. S-shit... that... thatâs not good, is it...?Â
 Mondo gets distracted from his stupid as shit concern when a new voice pipes up, shocking Mondo. Huh... he hadnât realized the kid was still out there. Shit.Â
 âU-uh guys? Itâs almost curfew, shouldnât you... stop? I know you both want to prove how big of badasses you are but... donât you think youâve done enough?â
 Mondo scowls at the meaning of the words, knowing that he sure as shit ainât gonna back down first. Heâs already so worthless. Heâs gotta prove that he can at least do this, of all fucking things.
 âShut up!â he barks, at the same time Ishimaru does, making him feel fucking wigged out at how theyâre both on the same page again.Â
 Naegi replies back to them, saying something about it being nighttime, and a tie... it honestly offends Mondo, but before he can reply, the kid is... talking... saying something about how in a true competition, there are no ties. That you either win or you lose, and that... thatâs the only thing that matters. It honestly kinda pisses Mondo off, even if he agrees fully, so he fires back how he will push the kid right up to the gates of hell, meaning it fully.Â
 He tells Naegi to leave then, knowing that this might drag on a lot longer than he had anticipated. Shit. He knew Ishimaru was fucking stubborn as shit, willing to do absolutely anything to reach his goals, but this... this is just madness. Utter madness. As Naegi leaves, Mondo cannot help how he stares at the hall monitor, who looks so fucking sick right now. He does his best to ignore it, to wait the kid out, but when roughly fifteen more minutes pass and the kid isnât tapping out, despite looking half dead, he... he canât help the worry that he feels. And then, when the kid closes his eyes, barely breathing, Mondo... s-shit...Â
 âHey... man... are you... are you okay...? Ya donât... donât look so good...âÂ
 Mondo listens, getting really kinda freaked, when Ishimaru lets out a soft puff of air, almost like heâs trying to laugh but canât find the energy. He lolls his head over to Mondo, the first movement heâs done in minutes, but his eyes are still closed, which looks so fucking freaky. It takes him far longer than it should to open his eyes, and when he does, they... shit. They look glazed, like the kid isnât fucking in there, like he... heâs...
 Already dead...
 F-fuck...Â
 It really does look like that, though. Eyes glazed, mouth partially open, chest so scarily still... o-oh, shit. Shit, what if he... what if he is dead...?! Y-yeah, he just moved, but he- he looks so still, it... Mondo...Â
 But then the kid is speaking, and he sounds so very out of it, but at least heâs alive, thank god...Â
 âI- Iâm... Iâm fine, I...âÂ
 Oh, shit... no, he... heâs not fine, is he...? Shit... s-shit...
 âShit... man... no, yâainât. I know my... my limits. Iâve got some time... left in me... but you... shit. Just give up, dude. Just... just give... up...âÂ
 It makes something in Mondo clench when he sees the kidâs face screw up, like he wants to cry but just has no tears left within him. And then he... heâs speaking...Â
 âNo... n-no, I canât... I- I canât... give up... I have to... have to...â
 The kid stops, then, and Mondo feels so fucking confused, his head all stupid because of the heat, making it hard to think. What? He has to... what?Â
 âHafta... what? What... is so important... ta ya?â
 The kid blinks, like he hadnât expected to be spoken to, before opening his mouth and muttering words. It... itâs like the kid doesnât even know heâs speaking, the words sounding so fucking slurred and soft. Mondo has to strain to hear them, even though the silence is oppressive between them.Â
 âI canât... give up... must... restore... honor... family... f-family name...âÂ
 Mondo furrows his eyebrows, his lips turned down in a frown, not... not understanding...
 âYer family... name? What⌠what about it?âÂ
 Ishimaru blinks, like he can barely understand what Mondo is saying, and fuck is that scary...Â
 âI must... fix his mistakes. I must... I must bring honor t-to... to our name... my grandfather...â
 Okay, that... that doesnât make any fucking sense... his grandfather? The fuck? Shit... Ishimaru needs to stop this, he... heâs not making any sense...
 âWhat? The fuck... the fuck ya talkinâ âbout, man? Shit... Ishimaru, yer âbout ta... ta fuckinâ pass out... why canât ya just... just give up, man?âÂ
 Ishimaru isnât looking at him anymore and is instead staring blankly at the steam that is billowing around them, looking like heâs not aware where the fuck he is. It makes Mondoâs stomach clench, the concern rising. He... he doesnât wanna give up, needs to prove himself, but he... Ishimaru... f-fuck...Â
 And then... Ishimaru starts talking again...
 âIt... itâs all up to me to fix it... t-to make it better... m-make it- it right-! I... I canât... give up, I... Iâm not... not allowed to... give up... giving up is- is wrong... and immoral, and- and I am not wrong! I... Iâm not- not immoral... I... Iâm better... better than my grandfather... better than myself... better... than...âÂ
 Okay. Okay. Okay, itâs official. Mondo is fucking freaked the fuck out. What... what does any of that even mean? He... Ishimaru...
 âFuck, dude, yer- yer scarinâ me... what the hell does⌠does any aâ that even⌠even mean? Yer the fuckinâ... Ultimate Moral Compass... âcourse yer not- not... immoral...âÂ
 Ishimaru is shaking now, eyes still glazed, staring at the steam as if it holds the answer to life itself. And fuck... itâs so fucking creepy...Â
 âBut I am, I am... Iâm worthless, Iâm nothing... my grandfather... heâd done so many terrible things, had hurt s-so many people... heâd ruined... ruined Japan... e-everyone hated him... hated me... I have to do better... to be better... to fix... my grandfatherâs... mistakes...â
 His grandfather? Who the fuck is his grandfather? And why... why does he even matter? Even if he was so fucking terrible, Ishimaru... he ainât... he...
 âDude... yâainât... ainât yer grandfather... yer yer own person... anâ frankly... I kinda... kinda like... s-shit. Just... stop this, man. Just admit it. Admit itâs... too much...âÂ
 The kid shakes his head, and Mondo doesnât know how heâs able to even hear him, as far fucking gone as he looks, but fuck, heâs clearly responding, ainât he...?Â
 âNnnn- n-no! I- I... I canât... canât admit... weakness... god Iâm so... so weak... pathetic... the children, theyâre right about me, theyâre all so... so right... Iâll never... amount to- to anything... Iâm worthless... pathetic... scum...âÂ
 H-holy shit... Ishimaru he... he canât fucking believe that... can he? No... n-no, he... he ainât none of that shit, Mondo is, Mondo is, but not- not Ishimaru! He... heâs fucking... he...Â
 âIshimaru... Ishimaru, stop... s-stop! Yâainât... none aâ that is... is true... yer the best... goddamn person I ever... ever met, ya... ya never gave up on me... no matter how horrible I treated ya... ya just... wouldnât leave... I tried ta make ya leave, why... why wouldnât ya leave...âÂ
 He hadnât meant to ask the question, voice so fucking soft, but he couldnât help it. Itâs been plaguing him for weeks now, wondering why... why Ishimaru bothered staying... why he didnât just leave his ass... why he didnât just... give up on him... like everyone always does...Â
 âMe... leave? Why? Where would I... go...? Iâve n-never... had a friend... if this is... is friendship... then what else can I... do? I donât... w-wanna... be...... alone.........â
 Oh... oh, shit... suddenly, so many things make so much fucking sense. Why the kid always seems so fucking nervous and awkward around people, though he tries his damndest to hide it. Why he is always alone, never seen really talking to anyone, not without a reason. Why he always... always does his best to extend olive branches to people, offering to tutor or help or do whatever is needed to... to get them to talk to him... g-god... he never would have thought the kid would have no friends, even though itâs so fucking obvious when Mondo thinks about it. Heâs just... heâs just so fucking bright and full of sunshine... Mondo canât imagine people seeing that and not... not wanting to...Â
 Itâs right then, in that moment, brain stupid from heat, halfway gone but not fully gone yet, that Mondo... Mondo makes a decision.Â
 If they survive this stupid fucking challenge... he... he will be Ishimaruâ no, Kiyotaka, his name is- is Kiyotaka... he will be Kiyotakaâs friend... and he will be a fucking good one, the friend that the kid... that he fucking deserves...
 If the kid even wants to be friends with him...Â
 âFuckinâ... shit, man. Yer not... alone... Iâm here. Ishimaru... Kiyotaka... Iâm right... right here...âÂ
 The kid shakes his head, breath still shallow, but now itâs wavering, shaking... trembling... g-god... fuck...
 âNo... no... Iâm alone, Iâm alone. Everyone... always leaves... my mother... my grandfather... even my father would leave... if he could... heâs never... never understood me. No one... understands me... I donât... even... understand...... myself..........â
 Oh. Oh. Oh. This... this poor fucking boy... he... s-shit. Shit... this... they gotta fucking stop this... they...Â
 âI... I understand ya. Yer... yer like me... ainât ya? Shit. We gotta... gotta stop this, man... what are ya... tryinâ... ta prove?âÂ
 Kiyotaka is shaking again, looking like he wants to cry but just... canât. God... god... fucking... god.
 âEverything. Everything. Every⌠everything⌠I have to prove them... wrong. I have to prove... that I can do this. If I... if I give up... i-if I let myself give up... then I fail. I fail, I fail, I fail, I fail, I fail. I c-canât... fail, I canât... g-give up... or else... what is... the point... of me...?âÂ
 Point? The point? Why... why does he have to have a point? Shit... heâs so fucking amazing, he... he doesnât have to have a point... no more than just... just being...Â
 âAinât gotta... have a point man... ya can just... be. Be... Kiyotaka. Whatâs so wrong... with that?âÂ
 The blank look on the kidâs face grows, his voice soft, weak. Trembling, like he doesnât mean to say it, like he doesnât even know what heâs saying. Mondo has never heard someone sound so... so... dead before... h-holy shit...
 âEverything. Everything. Everything. E-everything... is wrong with... me... I- Iâm too... too much. T-too passionate... too vibrant... I- I hurt... hurt my own eyes... I hate... l-looking at myself... hate... b-being myself... if I could... be someone else... I- I would... gladly...âÂ
 No. No. No, fucking... no! Ish- Kiyo... Kiyotaka canât fucking believe that... yeah, heâs so fucking passionate, so fucking bright, but that... thatâs not a bad thing... he... heâs so fucking good... so fucking... amazing... and he... Mondo wouldnât...
 âI wouldnât. Want that. Yer... fuck. Yer somethinâ... somethinâ special... I thought I... I hated that âbout you, but... man you... you shine... I donât deserve... someone as... as wonderful... as you...â
 Kiyotaka is shaking his head again, barely breathing, looking so dead, so very, very... dead...
 Oh, god...
 âI- Iâm not... wonderful. Iâm not... anything. T-the children... they hated me... t-they all... hated me. My f-father... hates me. My mother... if she could s-see me... now... s-sheâd hate me... too. Why... w-why do I bother... trying...? W-why... why donât I just... g-give up...âÂ
 N-no... no, no, god, please... no... Mondo feels pressure behind his eyes, and he doesnât think he has ever felt such pain. Because that... that sounds so goddamn familiar... he always has seen Kiyotaka as so different to him, so much better, so much brighter. But if the kid is to be believed... he... he thinks of himself like... like Mondo thinks of himself, and he... he canât... canât fucking stand that thought, oh god...Â
 âKiyo... Kiyota- Taka. Kiyo... Taka. Just... ya donât hafta... give up... but yer... yer gonna kill yerself if ya... keep this up... s-shit...â
 Mondo feels himself go cold when Kiyotaka responds, sounding half dead, looking so... so nothing...Â
 âKill... myself? No... Iâm not- not that weak... not anymore... not... n-not again... but maybe... maybe... m-maybe it would be better. If I werenât... werenât...â a pause. âAlive...â
 What?! No... no, no.... nonononononononononono-!!! He... he canât... he canât-
 âWhat?! Dude... no... god... fuckinâ... dammit! Ya canât be... serious... Kiyo... Taka, ya canât...â
 âI am. I am. I- I am. If I wasnât... so weak. If I wasnât... s-so afraid. I know... k-know how to fix it... a-all of it. How to... t-to make it better. My father... would be happier. The children... w-would be happier. And I... I... Iâd be... Iâd be...â
 A pause. Inhalation of breath. And then... softly, so fucking softly...
 âDead...âÂ
 No. No. No, fucking-! No. This... this is so fucking stupid, why is Mondo doing this, he... he has to stop this. This kid ainât gonna stop, he canât fucking stop, he wonât stop until he is fucking dead, and Mondo... Mondo canât... he fucking canât-
 He canât lose someone else... not during another fucking challenge that he fucking issued... he just... canât.
 âOkay. Thatâs it. This ainât... fuckinâ worth it. If yâainât... gonna quit... then I! I fuckinâ... I fuckinâ will. Ya... ya win... Kiyo... Taka... ya... ya win. Now, câmon, man. Letâs⌠letâs get outta here.â
 With all the strength he has left, Mondo stands and hobbles over to where Kiyotaka is sitting, looking like a puppet with its strings cut. Heâs not moving, barely breathing, and his eyes are so glazed over Mondo doesnât think he can even see right now. Mondo has never seen someone look so still before, and it scares the ever-loving shit out of him. Especially now that he... he knows that... that the kid has tried... or at least wanted...
 Fuck.Â
 Fuck.Â
 Fuck.
 But he doesnât have time to hate himself for issuing this stupid ass challenge. He doesnât have time to waste. Gathering all his strength, he bends down, and he wraps an arm around Kiyotaka, heart stopping when he feels how boneless he is, not moving at all. But then, as he starts moving towards the door, he feels the kid start to struggle. Itâs weak and doesnât sway Mondo even a second, but fuck does it relieve him. The kid is even able to walk a little, barely. It... itâs good.Â
 The second he manages to get the door open, however, the cool air almost torture on his overheated skin, he feels Kiyotaka gasp, all the fragile strength he had gone as his knees buckle, making him deadweight. But Mondo hasnât spent the majority of his life lifting weights for nothing, so he just adjusts his grip, taking on more of the kidâs weight. He doesnât lift him, doesnât have time for that, but he drags him bodily over to the bench, accidentally throwing him on it since heâs not really at a hundred percent himself. He sees the kid start to topple, then, and he immediately moves forward to steady the kid, the skin under his hands far, far too warm. Oh... shit, thatâs not... not good, oh fuck...
 âGoddamn shit. Ya look... fuck man. Why didnât ya just... dammit. Ya need water... Iâll be right back.â
 Mondo stand abruptly then, feeling clumsy and wrong. His chest feels so fucking painful, like itâs being sat on by an elephant, and he doesnât think heâs ever felt more concerned for anyone. Well... other than one person... but shit, he canât think of him, not now. Not now. Not when Kiyotaka needs him. He takes off his duster as he strides forward, tossing it carelessly on a bench, too fucking hot to deal with that shit. He needs to go quick, needs to... to get back to Kiyotaka... and he needs to drink some water himself, fuck, heâs so fucking dehydrated... fuck.Â
 However... once heâs at the water cooler, filling up one of the paper cups for himself to drink, he hears the kid muttering again, the words making no goddamn sense, but damn if it doesnât make his heart clench...
 â...they wonât, they wonât, they wonât... Iâm alone, again... all alone... everyone has left... everyone leaves me in the end... why would I expect anything different... why would I expect-â
 Shit. Shit. Shit. Mondo quickly finishes filling the cup and downs it, filling the second one as quickly as possible while the kid rambles on about being alone again. As soon as the cup is full Mondo practically teleports back to the kidâs side, an odd sense in him that he never, ever wants to be anywhere else...Â
 âShit, Kiyotaka, Iâm here. I just... had ta drink myself, shit. Now câmon. Drink this. Please, man. Fer me. I canât... ya canât fuckinâ die on me, man... f-fuck...âÂ
 He carefully places his hand on the back of Kiyotakaâs neck, lifting it gently up, so he can get the kid to drink some water. He knows that the boy is prolly dehydrated as fuck, and he seriously hopes thatâs the only thing wrong with him, because if it isnât... s-shit. He can feel Kiyotaka struggle as he moves him, his lips moving, muttering those fucking words again...Â
 âW-why am I so weak, I need to... to be stronger... to be... better...â
 God, is everything this kid says gonna make his heart break? God... heâs not equipped for this, he doesnât know how to be kind, to be gentle, but after all the shit he has done, all the pain and misery he has needlessly made this wondrous, incredible, sad fucking boy go through... he owes it to him to not only try, but to succeed.Â
 Even if it fucking kills him...Â
 âShh... hey, itâs okay. Yâainât fuckinâ weak, man, yer goddamn incredible. Now câmon. Stop fightinâ me. Let me take care aâ you. You... youâve been so strong fer so long. Let me... let me help you...âÂ
 With that, he slowly presses the cup against the kidâs lips, and he feels as he struggles, whimpering softly, scared. Shit, he... he prolly has no idea what the fuck is going on, is so fucking disoriented...Â
 He begins whispering to the kid then, not knowing what to say, but just... knowing he has to say something, something soothing. He hums softly as he decides to just... let the soft words that heâs been gathering for weeks now out of his heart, telling Kiyotaka that he is there, that he will always be there, promising that heâs not alone, that heâll never be alone again, that Mondo will take care of him, he promises... he promises...Â
 And then he... he says...
 âOpen up, Kiyotaka, shit. P-please... Iâm begginâ ya man... just... drink some water...âÂ
 The kid... Kiyotaka stops struggling then, and finally, finally opens his lips. Itâs just a little, a small amount, but itâs enough for a small trickle of water to get passed his dry and cracked lips, which is so fucking relieving. But then... then the kid startles again, a soft sound of distress getting released as he panics, taking too much water too quick. Oh, shit...Â
 So fucking scared, not knowing what to do but knowing he has to do something, Mondo lowers the hand holding the cup but doesnât put it down, moving his other hand to rub soothing circles on the kidâs back, shushing him softly.Â
 âAw, shit. Slowly, man, slowly. Thatâs it, nice anâ easy... Iâm gonna try that again, okay? Go slow this time. Idiot.â
 With that, Mondo moves his hand back to Kiyotakaâs neck and brings the cup back up to his lips, praying that he will drink this time. Heâs so fucking dehydrated and if he wonât drink, Mondo is gonna have to call an ambulance or some shit, because he needs liquid, and fast.Â
 Luckily, this time when he asks the kid to open up, he does so immediately. And then, when he tips a little of the liquid into his mouth, the kid doesnât panic and just... sips it. Slowly. Mondo can see his throat working, moving slowly, swallowing the water, and fuck... heâs never felt so relieved in his life, watching the kid drink some fucking water, god...Â
 However, then the kid is letting out a sound of desperation, seeming to realize that he is so fucking thirsty or something. He sees the kidâs hands try to come up, wavering so fucking much as they try and force the water down faster, but Mondo stops him, knowing he needs to go slow.Â
 âAw, shit man, stop! Ya gotta go slow. Yer dehydrated, ya canât drink it too fast... trust me, man. I got you. I wonât let you down. Not again. I⌠I promise.â
 And he means it. He fucking means it. He has failed this kid so many fucking times, but he wonât this time, and he never will again. Because now he... he knows that this kid fucking matters. Heâs always known that, from the minute the kid had run into him and knocked his world on its side, but- but he... heâs always been so afraid of it. Of the feeling. Of what it means.Â
 But heâs not afraid of it. Not now. Not... not anymore. He doesnât know why he feels this way, why this boy matters so fucking much to him, but it just doesnât matter now, and he refuses to let his goddamn fucking nonsense ruin this shit anymore. This kid has faced some truly horrible fucking things, things that Mondo has barely scratched the surface of but can tell have damaged the kid so fucking much. He has scars all over his chest and back, which Mondo has noticed before, of course heâs noticed them, but now heâs really starting to realize what exactly they mean, and it just... itâs fucking him up inside, and all he wants is to bundle this kid up and never let him get hurt again, keep him safe from all harm, and Mondo has always felt like that, always wanted that, but now, for once...
 Heâs not afraid of it.Â
 And he wonât back down.Â
 Not unless Kiyotaka wants him to...
 (But even then. Even then, Mondo will do everything he can to keep him safe. He wonât stalk the kid, but he will make sure that no one dares to lay a finger on him. Heâs firmly under Mondoâs protection now. Nothing will change that. Absolutely nothing.)Â
 Knowing that Kiyotaka needs to drink more, so heâs not so weak (physically. Heâs so fucking strong emotionally, so fucking strong) anymore, he presses the cup back to the boyâs lips, his heart lurching softly when the kid immediately opens up and drinks, slowly, not even needing Mondo to remind him to go slow and steady. Mondo is so fucking proud of the kid, like a fucking mother hen, but he doesnât care. This kid deserves all the softness in the world. If thereâs one thing Mondo is sure of, itâs that.Â
 It doesnât take long for the cup to run empty, but the kid needs more, so Mondo gets up to refill the cup. But then heâs fucking crying, sad and pitiful, and Mondo immediately returns, holding him close, saying to him, âaw, shit, Iâm just getting more water, alright? Iâll be right back, I promise.â
 And when Mondo is forced to leave againâ though god does he not want toâ he keeps talking. Promising that heâll be right back, that heâs not leaving, that he will never leave again... promises that he will never break, and not just because he doesnât break promises, but because he fucking means the shit out of them. More than any promise heâs ever made before.Â
 Heâs back soon after, bringing two cups with him this time, helping Kiyotaka drink, and drink, and drink. Mondo doesnât know much about severe dehydration, just knows that itâs important for the person to be given fluids, preferably sports drinks, but since he doesnât have that shit, water will have to do. If Kiyotaka doesnât get better after the third cup, Mondoâs gonna try and see if he can take him to the nurse if the lady is still there. If not... shit. Heâll prolly have to call an ambulance, since he doesnât think Kiyotaka could handle riding on his hog to the hospital, which is at least a ten-minute ride away. Heâs hoping he wonât have to do that, though. Hopes that drinking the water will be enough to help him. He also hopes that itâs just dehydration thatâs the problem... fuck.Â
 The good thing is that Kiyotaka is drinking willingly. And the more he drinks, the more lucid he appears. He still seems very out of it, but about halfway through the third cup, he starts blinking rapidly, like waking himself from a dream. His eyebrows furrow, and he starts looking around a bit. He takes in the bathhouse and even looks down at his chest, like heâs just then noticing that heâs half naked. Mondo allows him to do this, but always makes sure the kid is still drinking, wanting to make sure he gets at least three cups in, since he had to have lost a lot of water while sweating. Mondo himself isnât feeling too hot and knows he needs to drink more, too, but heâll be damned if he doesnât ensure that Kiyotaka is okay before doing anything else for himself.Â
 Mondo knows the exact second that things slot into place for the kid, since one second heâs loose and pliant in his arms, allowing him to hold his neck and give him the water, and the next heâs sitting ramrod straight, eyes wide. It startles Mondo a bit and he straightens up from the hunch heâd found himself in, so fucking relieved to see some lucidity in those bright red eyes. Fuck, but was that glazed look terrifying...Â
 âOh, shit. Are ya back? Ya really fuckinâ scared me there, dude, the fuck...? I was âbout ta take yer ass ta the nurse, consequences be damned. Shit, should I still do that...? Kiyotaka?âÂ
 The kid is just staring at him, his skin far too pale, his eyes moving back and forth over Mondoâs face as he seems to try to be figuring something out. They then widen somehow further and then-
 âAw, shit! Fuck, man, what the hell!â
 Mondo stares wide eyed at the kid as he abruptly stands, his body shaking horribly, looking like he just saw a ghost, shit... Mondo is afraid the kid is about to collapse so he stands quickly, hands hovering to ensure he doesnât fall, but the kid doesnât seem to notice him. Oh... shit... heâs not better, is he? God fucking dammit...
 âW-w-w-what... w-what... h-h-happened?! I... I didnât... oh god...âÂ
 Mondo sees Kiyotaka sway then, looking like heâs about to faint, scaring the absolute shit out of Mondo. Rushing forward, he grabs the kid by his shoulders, holding him upright. Part of him wants to pull him close, to wrap him up and never let him go, but he can tell the kid is super fucking freaked out, and he doesnât want to make him panic, shit.Â
 âWhat the fuck... aw, shit, yâainât better. Okay, thatâs it. Iâm takinâ ya ta the fuckinâ nurse. Goddamnit...âÂ
 Mondo tries to move Kiyotaka, then, carefully guiding him over to the door so they can make the stupidly long walk to the nurseâs office, mind racing a mile a minute as he tries to determine if it wouldnât just be better to call the ambulance now. On one hand, he doubts the nurse is still there, since itâs well after curfew, but on the other... calling for an ambulance means he might have to explain this shit, and he just... shit. But he needs to do right by Kiyotaka, and if that includes getting himself in trouble, heâll fucking do it. He doesnât care what happens to him, just as long as this wonderful, incredible boy is safe. Huh...
 As distracted as Mondo is, he doesnât expect any resistance to his movement, expecting Kiyotaka to be as pliant as he previously had been. As such, when the kid fucking pulls away from him, weak as it is, Mondo isnât expecting it and thus is unable to keep his grip. And he watches, heart stopping, as the kid slams into the row of lockers, collapsing immediately to the ground with a soft noise of pain.Â
 Shit!!!
 âShit! Kiyotaka, are you fuckinâ alright?! What the hell, man?! Stop beinâ an idiot and let me take ya ta the nurse, fuck!âÂ
 He doesnât mean to sound angry or anything, heâs just so fucking scared, needing the kid to cooperate so he can just get better already and not make Mondo worry heâs gonna fucking die or something... but given the way that Kiyotaka glares at him (or tries to glare, Mondo can tell heâs still a little out of it and canât quite put the usual amount of passion into it), he can tell the kid intends to be difficult, looking at him like he doesnât want Mondo to come any closer or something. Mondo immediately says, âfuck that,â though, and rushes to the kidâs side, kneeling down, his eyes bleeding with his concern. He watches the kid blink, some more lucidity rising within the red, as he opens his mouth to speak.Â
 âW-wait! I donât... dang it. I donât need to go to the- t-the nurse! Iâm just... confused. Give me... give me a moment to... collect myself!â Kiyotaka says, his chest heaving with the effort of speaking. Mondo looks at him firmly, ensuring the kid means it and that heâs not just saying random, nonsense bullshit again.Â
 Once heâs satisfied that the kid is, in fact, lucid enough to make that decision, he nods stiffly, still feeling so very, very concerned.Â
 âAlright... shit, fine. If ya say so. But ya gotta drink some more water, alright?! Slowly. I should drink more too, fuck...â
 Mondo stands, then, and walks over to the water cooler again, hands tingling unpleasantly as he leaves Kiyotakaâs side. He quickly fills up two fresh cups of water and hurries back, handing the kid one of the cups as soon as he is by his side.Â
 As soon as the kid takes it, Mondo flops down to sit beside him, so close they touch, and begins to drink his water, finding comfort in being able to feel the kid warm against his side. He is honestly thirsty as fuck, wanting to gulp it down again, but he forces himself to go slow, not wanting to be a hypocrite. He notices after a second that Kiyotaka isnât drinking and is just staring at him blankly, eyes glazing over again, which scares him more than he is willing to say, fuck.Â
 âDude. Drink. Or Iâm dragginâ ya ta the nurse, kickinâ anâ screaminâ. Donât think I wonât,â Mondo rumbles, startling the kid out of whatever fugue heâd entered into. The kid glares at him lightly, not nearly as strong as Mondo knows it could be, but at least he doesnât try and counter him. He just brings the cup to his lips and drinks the cool water slowly, his eyes darting back and forth as he thinks hard about something. They donât glaze over again, though, so Mondo lets him be and just drinks his water, every cell in his body so fucking aware of the kid sitting directly beside him. It honestly would scare him, how much he cares about this kid, if heâd not already decided to not care about that shit anymore. He cares about the kid. He doesnât know why, he just does. End of fucking story.Â
 Mondo doesnât know how long they sit there drinking their water, and he doesnât really care. He usually hates sitting still for so long, his skin crawling to get up and do something already, but strangely... he doesnât really mind it too much. Sitting here, beside Kiyotaka. It... despite the worry he still feels, thereâs also a strange calmness inside him now. Like... like something inside him that had been out of place and broken for years is just... gone, allowing him to breathe easy for the first time. Itâs so strange but also... so very, very nice...
 Eventually their cups run empty, and Mondo is about to offer to get them both some more water again when the kid speaks. His voice is low and shaky, but it sounds a lot better and more lucid than it had before, which relieves the shit out of him. But then he comprehends the words, and he...
 âO-Owada... back in... in the, uh, sauna... I didnât, um. Say anything strange. Did I?â Kiyotaka asks softly, looking very nervous. It concerns Mondo a lot that the kid apparently doesnât remember what happened in the sauna, but he supposes it makes sense. He had been super fucking outta it...Â
 He still takes his time to think about it. He usually just blurts out his words, no thought put into them at all, but this... shit. This matters. And he has to be so fucking careful if he doesnât want to hurt the kid again. And god, does he not wanna do that...Â
 Finally, he figures heâll go the safe route and figure out what, exactly, the kid does and doesnât remember. If he remembers nothing, then maybe... maybe it would be better to keep it that way, shit...Â
 Ignoring the way his heart clenches at the thought, he sets his face into a carefully neutral expression, revealing nothing as he speaks, voice a low rumble.Â
 âThat depends. What do ya remember?â
 Mondo watches, heart clenched strangely again, as Kiyotaka bites his lip gently, eyes unfocused as he thinks. Theyâre not glazed, though, so Mondo thinks heâs just concentrating, not zoning out. After a few moments, the kid glances up at him, expression open and searching. It makes Mondo want to gasp, everything in him swirling, and when the kid speaks, still looking at him, he... h-he...Â
 âIâm⌠Iâm not sure. Itâs all... fuzzy. I canât quite tell... what is real or not. I have no idea what I said during that last part, though... just fragments of old memories and thoughts.â Kiyotaka pauses, his hands shaking lightly. He looks away then, down at the ground, and Mondo feels so strangely bereaved... âBut I... I remember you... you said... things. About- a-about me. Y-you... you called me... wonderful. Special. H-heh! H-how r-ridiculous! I must... must have been- been hallucinating! Aha!âÂ
 The kid sounds nervous, frantic, like heâs afraid Mondo will hurt him, like heâs afraid Mondo will laugh at him, will tell him that he... heâs wrong, that Mondo hadnât said that, that he... he doesnât believe that...
 Which is bullshit. Because he did say that. And heâd meant it. Means it. Fully and completely.Â
 Mondo consciously forces his shoulders to lose the tension that had entered them unbidden at Kiyotakaâs frantic words, sighing softly, a wry smile rising on his lips as he looks at the kid. The kid looks so fucking scared, so desperate, like he doesnât believe that Mondo had said that shit, but that he wants to believe it.Â
 And, shit... even if he hadnât said it, he sure as shit would say it now. Because Kiyotaka truly is wonderful and special, ainât he...?Â
 Heh...Â
 âNah. That, uh. That happened. You really donât remember what you said?â he asks as casually as he can, his head tilted in question, hoping heâs hiding the way his heart is racing well enough, but honestly not really caring if heâs not. He... he doesnât want to keep shit from this kid. Not... not anymore... he watches as Kiyotaka shakes his head weakly, moving his eyes to stare at his hands again. It makes Mondoâs smile widen, eyes soft as silk. Heh. So... so fucking cute...
 âHeh. Makes sense. Ya werenât exactly all there, ya know. Kept mumblinâ bits aâ nonsense. Could barely make sense aâ ya myself, tell the truth. Somethinâ... somethinâ âbout yer grandfather. âBout needinâ ta right his wrongs. Anâ then there was somethinâ âbout other kids? Anâ hatred? Ya mentioned how yer da donât understand ya, how he hates ya, or somethinâ. Anâ âbout how... how ya... ya hate yerself. Which I think is fuckinâ bullshit, ya shouldnât fuckinâ hate yerself, yer incredible, but whatever. There was a lot aâ other stuff too. âBout not givinâ up, âbout havinâ ta prove people wrong. Some other shit, too, but I donât really âmember it all, sorry. But... shit man. Is that... is that real? Did ya... did ya really mean allaâ that?âÂ
 Mondo doesnât really mean to ask the question, knowing the kid needs to be allowed to rest and relax, not be asked stupid fucking questions, but he canât help it. Heâs not lying when he says he doesnât quite remember everything. Itâs all starting to blur in his head, and while heâs fairly certain he remembers the most of it, some details are starting to slip away, and he just... did the kid really say all that shit, or had he imagined it, too? Shit...
 But then... then, after a moment, Kiyotaka, he... h-he...
 âAw, shit,â he mutters under his breath, which seems to just make the kid cry harder. It breaks Mondoâs heart so much, hating seeing his tears. God... this kid just always fucking cries around him, doesnât he...? Shit... shit! H-he didnât want to make the kid cry! G-god, he... he wants so badly to hold the kid, to keep him safe from the sorrow within him, but would the kid even want that? After everything heâs done, all heâs taken from him, would he actually want to be held in his arms? Itâs his fault heâs crying, his fault heâs in this situation, and he doesnât know if Kiyotaka would want to be anywhere near him, let alone in his arms! But he... he wants so, so badly to... t-to...
 âPlease, man, donât cry, shit, Iâm sorry! I... aw, fuck it. Come here.âÂ
 Mind made up, Mondo darts forward andâ carefully as he possibly canâ wraps an arm around the kid, pulling him gently to his chest, firm and tight. He can feel the kid struggle against him, and it kills him inside to feel it, especially when the kid starts frantically apologizing, like he thinks Mondo is going to hurt him or something. He thinks it might be best to let him go, to apologize and never touch him again, but he... h-he thinks the problem isnât that Mondo is hugging him, but that the kid thinks Mondo is upset. So maybe... if he can reassure the kid that itâs okay, that he wants this, maybe... m-maybe heâll stop struggling so hard... and maybe... m-maybe...
 âShhh. Shh, câmon. Itâs okay, Kiyotaka. Iâm here. Yâainât alone. I got you. Ainât got nothinâ ta âpologize fer, ya got it? Yer okay. Weâre both okay.âÂ
 He keeps his arms steady on Kiyotaka, praying to any god that will listen that heâs doing the right thing, that heâs not hurting the kid more, that this is okay, and then... after a minute... after a minute...
 The kid stops. Stops struggling, stops apologizing. His chest is heaving, and his eyes are still leaking tears, but he doesnât seem distressed at Mondo holding him anymore. At least... Mondo hopes he isnât. And then... t-then...
 Kiyotaka buries his head in his chest, firm and present, hiding his face. His arms come up too, fists curling into Mondoâs tank top, clutching it like his life depends on it. And then he... he just...
 Lets go.
 The kid is crying so fucking hard, chest heaving, sobs loud and noisy, and fuck, does it hurt. Mondo feels so fucking helpless as he holds the kid, doing all he can to rub soothing circles on his back, whisper soft words in his ear, doing all he can to remember the shit Daiya would say when he was little and he still allowed himself to cry, not yet realizing it was wrong of him to do such a thing. He feels like itâs not enough, never enough, but he doesnât know what else to do. Heâs never seen the kid cry so hard before. Before he- he would always stifle it, keep it in.Â
 Mondo hadnât realized it at the time, but seeing the kid truly let go now, he can see just how hard he would fight to keep his tears and true sorrow contained, and he feels so much for the boy that he canât even begin to describe it. Itâs like... a sad kind of pride. Like heâs proud the kid was able to keep going despite the sorrow and despair he clearly feels, but also so, so fucking sad that the kid had to do it. That he had to keep this all in, unable to have anyone to share his burden with, to shoulder the pain and anguish he so clearly feels inside. Mondo... M-Mondo knows what that is like, what itâs like to have to always keep everything in, never let it out, and he... he hates that Kiyotaka knows it, too. The pain. The loneliness.Â
 Maybe they really arenât so different... are they?Â
 Fuck... and who knows? Maybe thatâs why heâs always cared so much about this kid. He... he just reminds him of him so goddamn much. Of... of the kid he used to be, before he built up walls so high around that child that heâd never see the light of day again. Of the scared little boy that he was, wondering why his parents hated him, why he was never good enough, why he didnât fucking matter. Heâd always been so scared and sad back then, so small and weak. Kinda like Kiyotaka is now, even with how fucking strong he knows this kid to usually be.Â
 But...
 But he had Daiya, didnât he? Even when the whole world was against him, (This sentence was removed due to ~~spoilers~~) he... he always had Daiya. Daiya, who loved him. Daiya, who cared for him. Daiya who raised him, Daiya who taught him, Daiya who sacrificed fucking everything for him. (This sentence was removed due to ~~spoilers~~). It didnât matter that he was scared, or that he was weak. Daiya loved him regardless, and he always, always kept him safe.Â
 Kiyotaka... Kiyotaka never had that... did he? He canât say for sure, but the kid has never mentioned a sibling, either older or younger, which makes him think heâs an only, no sibs, bro or sis. Which means that he... he didnât have anyone always on his side. Someone who would protect him no matter what. Or someone that he could protect, no matter what. His da is clearly not that great, if Kiyotakaâs words about him hating him were to go by, and his ma is gone, who knows for how long, or what his relationship was to her when she was around. He... he didnât have someone to protect him... to keep him safe, from all harm... to... t-to love him...
 Eventually the kid stops crying so hard, the desperate sobs petering out into soft, quiet ones, his breath hitching only slightly every few seconds. And then, a little while later he... he stops sobbing entirely. The tears have run dry, his body has stopped shaking, but he... he doesnât move away. He just stays there, in Mondoâs arms.Â
 Like he belongs there...Â
 âYa feelinâ better?â
 The words are said softly. Gently. He doesnât wanna spook the kid, knowing how fragile he prolly feels right about now. Mondo gets it. He hasnât let himself cry fully in years, not even... h-heh. Well. Point is, while heâs not truly cried in years, he remembers how fragile it leaves you feeling afterward. How shaky.Â
 And when he sees Kiyotakaâs eyes dart up, looking scared and afraid, Mondo doesnât tense up. Doesnât try and hide the openness on his face. He lets the kid see it. The softness. The care. The... the affection, because god, does he feel affection. He lets the kid see it, and he feels the kid settle against him, the fear vanishing, though the lingering sorrow remains. God... how Mondo wishes he could take that away...
 âYes. I... yes. M-Mondo... t-thank you. I... Iâm sorry...â
 Mondo canât help the way he reaches out at that, hand gently grasping a warm, wet cheek. He realizes absently that thatâs the first time the kid has said his name, and god is it making his insides squirm. And he can see the kid look at him with wide, watery eyes, lips open on a soft gasp, looking almost... dazed... shit...
 âDonât. Thank me. Apologize. Ainât nothinâ, got it? I... I didnât mind. At all. So, donât... donât apologize. Itâs alright. Youâre... youâre alright.âÂ
 And he means it. God... does he mean it. It... it had felt nice. So very, very nice. Holding Kiyotaka. Comforting him as he cried, somehow not fucking it up as badly as heâd been fearing. Heâs always been so fucking shit at comforting people, feeling like he has to be tough all the time, unable to comfort since tough people arenât soft and sympathetic. But here, with Kiyotaka... h-heâd been able to be soft. Kind. Gentle. All the things heâs secretly yearned to be for so fucking long, but never was able to, since he doesnât lead a life that is suited for such things. He always has to be so tough, so strong, but... but with Kiyotaka... with this wondrous, amazing, incredible, beautiful boy...
 He can be soft.Â
 And he will never be able to thank Kiyotaka enough for giving him that ability.Â
 And when Kiyotaka smiles at him, wide, bright, unrestrained...? Mondo canât help how he smiles back, wider than heâs ever felt it go before, heart beating so softly and yet meaningfully, feeling so very much for this precious boy. He... heâll never be able to repay him for this... will he? For what he has given him this day... even if they are never this close again, even if Kiyotaka doesnât want anything to do with him after this, heâll never forget what this felt like. What it feels like to be soft. And gentle. And... and kind.Â
 But... shit. Shit.Â
 Now that they have this... now that heâs tasted this... what happens now? He... he doesnât wanna...Â
 âShit, man. The fuck we do now? I... I donât wanna go back ta how it was. I... shit. I was a goddamn monster ta ya these last few weeks... since we met, shit⌠I... goddamn it,â Mondo mutters, feeling his smile fade as pain fills him, remembering all the shit he has done to this poor, amazing kid. The shit heâs said. The way heâs acted. Kiyotaka gave him so much today, but he hadnât earned any of it, had he...? He can see the kid shaking his head, looking frantic, like he doesnât agree, and Mondo canât help how he glares. Lightly, but it still makes the kid flinch back, proving how much heâs hurt him, and how much he can still, potentially, hurt him. God... he doesnât wanna ever hurt him... not again⌠âNo, donât deny it. I was a fuckinâ moron. I just... I ainât ever... I donât get you, Kiyotaka. What I feel... when you- you look at me...âÂ
 And itâs true. He still doesnât quite get it. What he feels. Why he feels it. It... he thinks he might kinda get it, might kinda realize what this feeling is, why he wants to protect this kid so badly, but it... it doesnât quite feel like it fits. And he just... he just doesnât know... but... if not this then... what else? H-heh...Â
 Sighing softly, feeling so confused but strangely not angry about it, Mondo allows a wry smile to rise on his lips as he presses closer to the kid, as close as heâs always secretly longed to be, since that first day when he held him but not ever close enough. One of his hands is curled loosely around Kiyotakaâs waist, while his other is still gently cupping his cheek and has been for a little while now. He notices dimly how they are almost bare, Kiyotaka wearing only his underwear while Mondo is in his thin tank top and loose black pants, and he can feel the kidâs heat as it presses against him, oddly intoxicating. Mondoâs hair is down from its pomp, having been knocked loose sometime in the sauna, and itâs been years since someone outside his gang saw him without it up, it makes him feel so naked to have it down, but he... he doesnât really care. Not when itâs only Kiyotaka who sees it.Â
 He... he wants Kiyotaka to see all of him... every last part.Â
 Because he... he views the kid like... like a...Â
 âItâs like yer my brother or somethinâ. Like... my nerdy, dorky little brother. Someone I gotta take care of. Protect. Keep safe, from all harm. I never... shit. I had my brother, but he... heâs gone now. I canât... I couldnât protect him, fuck. Anâ I⌠f-fuck. I canât protect you, either, can I...? No, I⌠I canât... I canât... a-and why the fuck would you want a fuck-up like me, anyway? You... god, you could do so much better... why would you want someone like me as your brother, s-shit...âÂ
 The thought stabs Mondo through the heart, the realization that as much as he may want to have this with Kiyotaka, to have a brotherhood with him, they... they likely never will. Because Mondo has messed up too much. Because Mondo ruined their chance before it ever even had the opportunity to live. Because Mondo is so fucking broken and damaged that no one in their right mind would ever want him as a brother. Daiya was forced to have him, and he was so fucking amazing that he chose to love him anyway, but Kiyotaka... he doesnât have to be stuck with him. He doesnât owe Mondo anything, anything at all. In fact, Mondo is the one who owes Kiyotaka. So much. So very, very much. Kiyotaka wouldnât want him. He just... he wouldnât.Â
 And as he feels the kid freeze against him, breath stuttering and harsh, he... he knows heâs right, isnât he? S-shit... he shouldnât have said that, shouldnât have thought himself good enough to deserve such a gift. Kiyotaka, wanting him like that... wanting him at all... while he may have been soft and pliant in his arms a moment ago, seeming like he was at ease, that doesnât mean it was because of Mondo or anything that Mondo did. Heâd been through an emotional time and heâd needed comfort, and Mondo had just been the nearest warm body. Doesnât mean he trusts Mondo or that he wants anything from him at all. Heâd have to be the worldâs biggest fool to think Kiyotaka could ever want him, want him at all.Â
 And Mondo... he may be a fool, but he ainât that big of a fool.Â
 Heart aching painfully in his chest, Mondo canât help how he pulls away, not wanting to force Kiyotaka to be near him when he doesnât deserve it, doesnât deserve it at all.
 âShit, I was right, goddamn it, aw shit! J-just forget I said anything, I- fuck!âÂ
 Mondo hands come up to clutch at his hair, then, the grip tight and painful but he doesnât care. He wants it to hurt. To ache. Itâs what he deserves for fucking this whole thing up, for being so woefully unworthy of being close to such a bright and beautiful boy. Maybe, had he been betterâ a better person, a good personâ he could have been worthy of it. Had he never let his insecurities get in the way, had he just accepted what he felt as true the minute he felt it, not pushed it away in fear, maybe... maybe then, he could have had this. Kiyotaka, as his friend. Kiyotaka, as his brother.Â
 But no. No, no. He had pushed it away. Had been afraid of it, so very afraid. Had let his fear turn to anger, like he was so wont to do, and ruined everything before it even began.Â
 He deserves all the misery he feels for how stupid heâd been...Â
 Mondo gets jolted out of his thoughts when he feels a soft, tentative hand touch him, his eyes wide and manic as he looks at Kiyotaka, who looks so fucking afraid, god. H-he scares the kid so goddamn much, like he scares everyone, because heâs a monster, a senseless beast that only ever hurts people. Breaks people. Heâs not allowed nice things, not allowed good things. Not allowed to be gentle, or soft, or kind. He... heâs just not...Â
 To his utter shock, he can see Kiyotaka smile at him. Itâs soft, and hesitant, and... and beautiful... but it canât be real. It... the kid is trying to be kind, trying to hide his fear to make Mondo feel better, because heâs so goddamn nice, so fucking good, shit-Â
 âN-no! Donât worry! I was just- not expecting that! But I- I feel- the same. I feel- the same! I would be honored, Mondo Owada, to be considered your brother! Iâve never had a brother, never even had a friend, but I couldnât imagine a better one than you! Y-you... youâre incredible...âÂ
 He... he... does he really mean that...? Does he truly... truly wanna be Mondoâs... Mondoâs brother? The kid is so bad at lying, and it hadnât sounded like he was lying, but... but it... shit. It canât be true, it canât... after all the shit Mondo has done, how could the kid ever see him positively, even a little? Mondo isnât a good brother, heâd always been so shit to Daiya, taking and taking and taking and never giving. Heâd taken everything from Daiya, never satisfied with what Daiya gave freely, so he stole the most important thing in the end.Â
 H-heâd just steal everything from Kiyotaka too.Â
 Itâs what he does...Â
 âYa canât mean that, Kiyotaka... Iâm a goddamn mess... and you... you are... shit. Youâre goddamn perfect and Iâm hot dog shit, ya canât... y-you canât...â
 And itâs true. Mondo has more to say, more to confess, but his throat is so thick, and he doesnât know how to say it. To confess all his crimes to Kiyotaka, to let him know how unworthy he is. He- he hears Kiyotaka take a deep breath, and he doesnât wanna hear what the kid has to say, doesnât wanna hear him agree, but then heâs speaking, and his words... t-they...Â
 âMondo... I- Iâm not perfect. I... Iâm not. B-but thatâs okay! I do my best, but so do you! I can see how hard you try and sometimes thatâs all that matters! Youâre not... dog feces! You... youâre so much more, Mondo...âÂ
 No... n-no, the kid, he... he doesnât understand, he just- he doesnât understand! Mondo, he has to... has to tell him. N-not all of it, heâs not strong enough to confess it all, heâs always been so goddamn weak, but he- he has to... a little. Enough so the kid knows. So he stops feeling pity for him and realizes that he...Â
 Heâs just not worth it...Â
 âNo. N-no, I ainât shit, goddamnit, I...â Mondo has to stop, feeling so fucking conflicted. On one hand he wants to confess, on the other hand he wants to be selfish, and he just... h-he just...Â
 But he canât. Be selfish. Not... not about this.Â
 Not with Kiyotaka.Â
 With a soft sigh, he feels the tension inside him melt away, his body relaxing with the decision heâs made. All of his emotionsâ both good and badâ fade away until all he feels inside is... is...
 Cold resignation...
 âI hate myself. Always fuckinâ have. Heh. There, I... I fuckinâ said it. I love the gang, donât get me wrong. I love beinâ with âem, beinâ a part aâ somethinâ bigger than myself. I love leadinâ âem, ridinâ my hog, wind in my hair... I fuckinâ love it. Even beinâ here, unable ta lead directly, I still like callinâ the shots from behind the scenes while my second in command implements it anâ shit. Means somethinâ, âleast. But... I dunno. Sometimes Iâll be in the middle ofa fight and Iâll just... wanna stop. Quit. Do somethinâ... do somethinâ else fer a change. But I⌠heh. I canât. I promised my bro... Daiya, I... I promised him Iâd keep the gang together. He built it from scratch anâ I... I canât leave that. I made a promise, a manâs promise, ta keep us together. So, I... I gotta keep doinâ that. Canât stop. Ever. Not âtil the gang is dead anâ shit, all the members movinâ on ta do better shit with their lives. Anâ me⌠heh. Not much use fer me after that, is there?â
 Mondo pauses, and then looks down at his hands, a small, sad smile on his face.Â
 âBut you? Yer gonna go places, man. Shootinâ fer the moon. Prime fuckinâ Minister, shit, man. Never met anyone with such high goals, really. Never met anyone who wanted ta do that sorta shit, change things from the inside. Heard ya in class, talkinâ âbout yer plans anâ shit. Wantinâ ta make the world a better place, havinâ such hope for this garbage planet. Ya... yaâve got drive. Determination. Anâ I know yer gonna do it, ya know. Succeed. More than any aâ the other chucklefucks we go ta school with, âleast. Yer just so... determined. Got such passion. I... I admire that âbout ya, always did.â
 Mondo pauses again, and he⌠he laughs. Itâs sad, and pathetic, and it... he... h-heh...
 âBut that⌠heh. That ainât me, Kiyo. Ainât me. I ainât got plans, ainât got any fuckinâ clue aâ what Iâm gonna do after school ends. They got me takinâ fuckinâ leadership classes anâ shit, but the fuck am I gonna do with that bullshit? I can lead a gang, yeah, but that⌠heh. Thatâs âbout it, Christ. Anâ ya⌠yer gonna see that one day. And yer gonna leave me. And Iâll be happy fer ya, âcourse I will, but... sh-shit. God... goddamnit...âÂ
 Mondo doesnât know where heâs going with this. He doesnât know what heâs saying or why heâs saying it. His head is so jumbled, so scrambled, and part of him wants to tell Kiyotaka everything. About his parents. About his brother. About what he did, what he stole. He wants to confess so, so badly, to see the hatred and anger and rage on that kidâs face when he realizes how big a piece of shit Mondo really is, horrified that heâd ever felt pity for such a pitiless creature.Â
 But...
 He canât. Canât do that. He... he canât burden Kiyotaka with his bullshit. And knowing the kid... heâd still try. To feel pity. To feel sorrow. He- heâs such a good person, so bright and shining. Heâs the kind of person who would see a merciless and dangerous monster like him and think thereâs something worthwhile in it. It wouldnât be until his neck is snapped under Mondoâs uncaring hand that heâd realize he was wrong. And maybe... maybe not even then. Heâd die, thinking Mondo was better than he was, even if it were Mondo who killed him.Â
 God...
 So, he canât tell the truth. Canât burden the kid like that. But he... he canât let him get close. Even if he... he really wants to...Â
 âIâll just hold ya back. Ya donât want someone like me, Kiyo. Ya donât want someone like me at all. So... I âppreciate yer words. But it may be best ta leave this here. Ta... ta forget âbout this all and just... move on. Iâll leave ya alone and ya wonât hafta-â
 âNo!â Mondo hears echo through the room, cutting off his words so thoroughly. It startles the fuck out of him, and he canât help how he stares, wide-eyed, up at Kiyotaka. Itâs weird, looking up to see the kid, but heâs sitting upright, almost standing but not quite, knees firmly planted on the floor. But seeing as how Mondo is crumbled pathetically on the floor, sitting back on his thighs, he has to look up to see Kiyotaka. And he looks... looks so...
 Scared...
 But...
 Not... not of- of... of Mondo...?Â
 âMondo, please! I just... look. I- I try to be perfect, but I... Iâm not! And I know you arenât either! But... but maybe thatâs okay! Maybe... m-maybe... maybe we can learn to be not perfect... together? I, ah. I donât know! A-all I know is... I want to be f-friends with you, Mondo Owada. I donât care about your flaws; I donât care that youâre in a gang! I just... I want... w-we can be brothers. If you want... we can be brothers. I want... I would want nothing more than to be your brother! Your kyoudai!âÂ
 Brothers. Brothers. Kiyotaka wants them to be... brothers...
 Itâs too good to be true. Too fucking good to be true. Mondo doesnât get nice things like this. He doesnât get soft, kind, gentle things. He gets shit. He gets cruelty. He gets anger and hatred and rage. He gets angry fists and cruel words, and a suspicious look on his back at all fucking times. After all the shit he has done, the people he has hurt, the lives he has ruined, he... he doesnât deserve... he just doesnât...Â
 But as he sits there, staring up at Kiyotaka with wide eyes and an open mouth, he... he remembers something. Something the kid had said, in the sauna. How he... he never had a friend before. How everyone always hated him. And it could have just been insecurity talking, the kid thinking people hated him when they really didnât but judging by the scars, he... he would doubt that.Â
 Heâs never had a friend. Heâs never had a brother. Someone to keep him safe. To protect him from all harm. Someone to hold onto, someone to tell him it is alright. That he is alright. He... he hasnât had that.Â
 And Mondo is the worst choice for a brother. He knows it, okay? Heâs so fucking awful itâs not funny. But... but he... the kid doesnât seem to get that. And Mondo is too weak to explain why he shouldnât want it. And, as such, he... Kiyotaka wants to be friends. Brothers. With him.Â
 Mondo is a mess. He messes everything up, ruining everything he touches. He... he doesnât want to ruin Kiyotaka too. He doesnât want to hurt him. He... he never...
 But maybe...
 Maybe...
 Itâs stupid. God, so fucking stupid. But maybe... if he tries hard, so fucking hard... if he is careful, keeps his anger in check, does all he can, he... maybe he...
 He can be Kiyotakaâs brother...
 And keep him safe...
 It makes him smile. Itâs small at first, tentative. Like a stiff wind will blow it away. But as Kiyotaka keeps looking at him steadily, earnestly, he... he feels the smiles strengthen. Feels as it grows wider and wider, until it fills his whole face, his eyes squinting with how wide it is. Heâs never felt like this before, so scared and terrified, but also... also...Â
 Hopeful.
 âYa... ya really mean that, Kiyo?âÂ
 Kiyo. Mondo doesnât really know why heâs calling the kid that, nicknames arenât super common in their culture, but somehow, he... he kinda likes it. He doesnât know if the kid does, he should ask, but before he has the chance to, the kid is nodding. Enthusiastic and bright, a shaky grin on his face. He still seems a little out of it, but god, is he trying... fuck that kid is so amazing...
 âYes! Of course! I always mean everything I say! I would not lie to you, Mondo, I promise you that! We shall be the best kyoudai! Youâll see! Aha! This is fantastic!â
 Oh, god... this kid is so fucking cute! God... h-he really shouldnât be thinking that, should push it away like he always pushes stupid ass thoughts like that away, but he... heâs allowed to see his brother as cute... right? Or, well... his little brother. Though... fuck. Is Kiyotaka younger than him? He seems like it, as naive and endlessly optimistic as he is, but fuck, he doesnât actually know. Mondo is usually one of the youngest in his class, since his birthday is at the end of the year, but heâs always felt decades older than the chucklefucks he goes to school with. Maybe itâs âcuz he was forced to grow up so fucking fast in order to survive, shit.Â
 But you know what? Whatever. It doesnât matter if Mondo is older or not. Heâs the older brother regardless. That shit is felt, not necessarily determined by birth order. Daiya was his older brother in more ways than just because he was physically older, after all. Â
 At the end of the day, it doesnât matter. What does matter is that... that Kiyotaka wants this. Wants... wants Mondo. And Mondo doesnât deserve it, had never deserved it, but fuck, is he a selfish bastard. But he wonât take this shit for granted. Now that they are brothers, Mondo will go all fucking out. No fucking reservations. They are brothers, now, and Mondo is the big brother. The ani. Itâs his duty and obligation to keep Kiyotaka safe from all harm, including (and especially) from Mondo himself. And he wonât. Hurt him. Not now, not ever. If he ever does, he will stab himself in the gut, commit fucking seppuku, he swears he will. Heâd rather die than hurt this precious, amazing, incredible boy ever, ever again.Â
 And so, Mondo grins, and he laughs, and he lets his arms reach forward and wrap around the kid, like heâs been wanting to do since he ripped himself away the last time. Part of him is afraid the kid wonât want it, or heâll realize how stupid this whole thing is, but Kiyotaka doesnât even tense at all as he goes willingly into Mondoâs arms, melting like warm putty against him. Like he... he belongs there...
 S-shit...Â
 âOkay. O-okay. Kiyotaka, I... Iâll do my best. I canât promise ya anythinâ, know Iâm a goddamn fuck-up who ruins everything, but... but for you? Iâll try. That... thatâs all I can offer... hehâŚâÂ
 Itâs not enough, not nearly enough, but he feels Kiyotaka wrap his arms around him, holding on so very, very tight, and it... it feels...
 Like coming home...Â
 âThat is all I could ever ask of you, my kyoudai! Y-youâre not a- a screw up! And- and your best is more than enough!â
 Shit. Shit. No one... no one has ever told him that before. That the best he offers is more than enough. Itâs never been enough, heâs never been enough. Heâs a screw up. The unwanted kid. The person who is good for violence and anger and rage, and thatâs about it.Â
 But here, being held by this remarkable fucking kid... hearing him say that itâs enough... that heâs enoughâŚ
 Maybe heâs inclined to believe him.Â
 Wow... just...
 Wow...
 After a minute Mondo pulls back, knowing they need to talk about stuff, knowing he has to make promises, and it makes his heart sing when he feels the kid resist, arms refusing to let go at first. It makes him laugh softly, especially because he fully understands. But he doesnât intend to go far. Just... he needs to look the kid in the eyes. He... he needs to see those beautiful as sin eyes...
 Pressing his forehead to Kiyotakaâs, soft and gentle and intimate, he canât help how he smiles, eyes shining with the light he feels inside. And Kiyotaka... he...
 He looks at Mondo like he fucking matters...Â
 âIâll be good. Fer ya... Iâll be good. Promise, Kiyo. And ya can hold me ta that, got it? This is a promise between men. That means I gotta keep it.âÂ
 The kid looks stunned, eyes glazed but not in a bad way, breath hitched, and it... it makes Mondo feel...
 âLikewise! I- I will do everything I can to be the best brother I can be! I promise! We shall be the best kyoudai in the world! Thatâs a Kiyotaka Ishimaru guarantee!âÂ
 The enthusiastic words make Mondo laugh again, and he pulls away to wrap an arm around the kidâs shoulders, ruffling his hair gently like Daiya would always do to him. He notices that the hair is a bit longer than it once had been, and fuck, does he like it. The sweat from the sauna had made all the gel run out and his hair is now soft as it dries, curling lightly around the kidâs ears and it just...
 Itâs so beautiful...Â
 But ruffling the kidâs hair makes it fall in his eyes, which makes the kid let out an annoyed sound, adorable again, and Mondo canât help the way he laughs. God, this kid makes him so goddamn happy... heâs never felt this happy before... never...
 âYer the absolute, goddamn best, kyoudai. Kiyo. Hey, uh... is it okay if I call ya that? Kiyotakaâs just a bit of a mouthful, âsall. Ya got any other nicknames I could use?âÂ
 He looks at the kid at that, Kiyotakaâs (or should he say Kiyo? Does the kid like it? Shit...) mouth pulled down in a thoughtful frown. A moment passes, and then-Â
 âA-ah! Kiyo is fine! If youâd like! B-but... well... m-my mother. She called me... Taka. Y-you could use that, as well! If youâd like...âÂ
 Taka, huh? Taka. Taka. Yeah... yeah, he- he likes it. He likes it a lot! It suits the kid, and while Mondo still does kinda like Kiyo, he might like Taka a bit better. And if the kid wants him to call him that, then shit... who is he to deny him...?
 Smiling, soft and gentle in a way heâs never been able to be before, he nods.Â
 âTaka... heh, I like it! Alright, Taka. Mondo ainât exactly got any good nicknames fer it, but ya can call me that, if yaâd like.â
 Mondo watches as Taka blushes lightly, lips still partially open as he breathes in and out slowly. His eyes are kinda glazed still, but he seems present enough. Just... like heâs thinking of something. Mondo wants to reach out, wants to pull the kid into a hug again, wants to always, always be touching him, but he keeps his distance. Just... just for now. But later...Â
 The kid shoots up again, interrupting Mondoâs thoughts, looking so enthusiastic again, eyes bright and smile happy. Holy shit...
 âOh! I can always call you kyoudai!! That way the whole world will know our manly bond!âÂ
 It makes Mondo laugh again, harder, and he canât help how he reaches out to ruffle his hair again, needing to touch him at least a little. Kyoudai, huh? ... yeah. Yeah, he likes that, too. Daiya was always ani to him, the proper name for the big brother, and Daiya usually called him shit like âkidâ or whatever, so itâs not like Taka calling him that will bring up any bad memories or shit. Itâs just... something for them. Their own, little thing, for them and no one else.Â
 Him and Taka. Taka and him. Two... two kyoudai...
 Incredible...Â
 âAlright, Taka. If yaâd like. Now, itâs fuckinâ late. I ainât even gotta look at a clock ta know that. Come on, kyoudai. Letâs get ya ta bed.âÂ
 Mondo stands, then, realizing how fucking late it is. The kid always gets up stupidly early, he remembers Taka saying that once a little while ago, so he knows they should be heading to bed soon. He feels strangely reluctant to do that, never wanting to part from this beautiful boy, but- but heâs the big brother. He has to keep his little brother safe and healthy, and that includes ensuring he gets a good nightâs sleep. Even if it means they have to part ways...
 As Mondo stretches, he sees Taka stand as well, his body flushing bright red as he looks down at himself and seems to notice his state of undress. Like heâd forgotten or something. Mondo hadnât. Not... not for a single second. Shit...Â
 He feels his eyes dart down to the kidâs chest, unbidden, and he feels the small smile die on his lips as he sees the long, jagged looking scar that goes from Takaâs collarbone to the bottom of his sternum, right over his heart. How... how the fuck did he get a scar like that...? It doesnât look like one that would come from surgery or something, since itâs too jagged, and it also doesnât look accidental. But... but how the fuck...Â
 âHowâd ya get that? The... the scar?â Mondo finds himself asking softly before he can stop himself, his hand rising absently to trace the length of it. Fuck, but it feels as jagged as it looks... angry and painful. H-he hopes it doesnât hurt anymore...Â
 âA-ah... that...â Taka mutters, his body flushing. It jolts Mondo out of the fucking fugue he entered, and he removes his hand quickly, feeling embarrassed. S-shit... he shouldnât have asked that, it ainât his fucking business. Yeah, theyâre kyoudai, but that... that donât mean heâs earned the right to hear the kidâs dark history. He still has to earn that shit. He knows that.
 âAw, shit! Taka, ignore me. Yâainât gotta talk âbout that shit. Uh, shi-shoot, I mean... stuff? Sorry⌠heh, know ya hate swearinâ anâ sh- stuff. HehâŚâÂ
 Taka blinks at Mondoâs rambling words, which makes him feel strangely nervous. He doesnât let it take over him, though. Doesnât let himself get angry. But strangely... the anger he usually feels when embarrassed or nervous just... never showed up in the first place. Huh...Â
 He watches, then, heart clenching, as Taka smiles at him, soft and gentle as ever. F-fuck...
 âI... I donât mind! Itâs not exactly a pleasant story, but I trust you, kyoudai! And... I donât mind you cursing! Much! It... itâs what makes you, you! Just as long as you donât do it in class or in the halls!â
 He... doesnât mind him... cursing...???? After all those warnings, all of those detention slips, he truly expects Mondo to believe he doesnât mind it when Mondo fucking curses?Â
 But... huh. He canât detect a lie in the kidâs words. He looks as earnest as ever, and it just... god. Mondo canât begin to describe how he feels right now, just that it feels... soft.Â
 Taka... Taka makes him feel soft. And fuck, is it not bad... not bad at all...Â
 Unsure of what to say, what to do, Mondo just laughs again, since thatâs the only thing that even slightly manages to express the softness that he feels inside, and he smiles at the kid gently while nodding. He should feel stupid, ridiculous, but he just... doesnât.Â
 God...Â
 He watches then as Taka walks over to the locker heâd used earlier, seeming to want to no longer be partially nude. Mondo doesnât mind it, has never minded being around naked dudes, but he guesses not everyone can be like that. As the kid dresses, he starts to talk. And the story he tells...Â
 âIt was one of my middle school bullies. I, er... wasnât well liked, as a child! They never liked how I would get them in trouble, not to mention... ah. M-my, well. My grandfather,â Taka mutters, voice turning nervous as he talks about his grandfather, glancing at him anxiously.Â
 Mondo still isnât entirely sure what the kidâs deal with his grandfather is, but he can tell it bothers the kid, shit, so he does his best to not look at all judgmental, even though the fact the kid was fucking bullied makes his blood fucking boil... shit. Heâd expected it, honestly, but it still fucking angers the fuck out of him, ChristâŚ
 Luckily, it seems his anger at that isnât too obvious, since the kid continues then, voice less shaky and upset, even though the shit he says...Â
 âOne day, one of them was... particularly angry. Iâd gotten him suspended, you see, for a week. It was his own fault, he was the one who had scratched profanities into the headmasterâs car, Iâd just been the one to report it! Still, he was... angry. So, after school, he had his friends hold me down while he cut this into my chest. A reminder, he said, to mind my own business. I think he was going to do more but was interrupted by something. It was most unpleasant!âÂ
 Holy. Fucking. Shit.
 Holy shit, holy shit!
 What the goddamn shit?!
 Some goddamn motherfucker... carved that shit into Takaâs chest...?! And how the fuck can Taka sound so casual about it?! Mondo has never felt so much rage directed towards someone heâs never met, but holy fucking shit, that goddamn bastard had better hope Mondo never meets him, or else he is fucking dead. The thought that anyone could ever hurt this wonderful boy in such a way is just so... insane to Mondo. How people can see him and not want to keep him safe from all harm is just... he doesnât get it. Even when he told himself he hated the kid, he couldnât bear the thought of actually hurting him. Not really.Â
 And Taka he... he looks so fucking sad, right now. But also, just... resigned. Like he expects that treatment and, while it sucks, itâs just... life. Which is so much fucking bullshit, holy fucking shit-
 Mondo unintentionally lets out a strangled noise, his anger and rage choking him inside. He sees the kid look up at him and sees panic rise in his face when he sees the anger Mondo so clearly feels. Oh, shit... shit, heâs not mad at Taka, heâs not at all, but he canât make the anger go away, because... because...Â
 âThey fuckinâ what?! What the goddamn shit?! Please tell me ya got those fuckers expelled!âÂ
 He had to have... right? Taka is so gung-ho about rules and shit, he- he must have told on those fuckers and got all of them expelled... r-right?Â
 Wrong...
 âA-ah! N-not exactly! I... I never reported them! I rarely ever did, to tell the truth... it wouldnât have mattered, see! The teachers didnât like me much either; they only ever believed me if I had proof, and even then, only half the time! And they never much cared when I got hurt... b-but it was okay! I persisted and never let them break me down! My struggles made me stronger! Aha!âÂ
 W... what? He... he... oh, oh god... n-no...Â
 âY-you... what?â Mondo whispers, his eyebrows furrowed, his hands shaking. He has never felt so horrified before, a terrifying realization overcoming him. Because he... he was right, wasnât he? This kid... h-he was abused. Horribly so.Â
 By literally fucking everyone, holy fucking shit-!
 âI mean... thatâs just... how it was? I handled it, though! I never gave up! They... they did not break me!âÂ
 Oh. Oh. Oh, this... this poor fucking kid... his poor fucking kyoudai, having to go through that nightmare, actually believing that it was just... normal. Just... how it was. But he... he canât actually... actually believe he deserved it... r-right...?
 âGoddamnit... thatâs why ya keep tellinâ me ta... ta punish ya, ainât it? Taka, please tell me ya donât actuâly think ya deserved that shit?âÂ
 He canât. He canât. Please, god, he... he canât...
 Mondo watches, heart breaking so thoroughly inside his chest, as Taka looks down at his uniform jacket, the only piece of his get up heâs not yet wearing. Heâs frowning gently, like he actually has to fucking think about it, oh god, no...
 âI- I... I suppose so... I mean-! I... I donât know. They all hated me... s-so... they must have had a good reason... r-right? To... to hate me. I... I must have deserved it... right?âÂ
 No. No. No. Mondo... he canât fucking handle this shit. So many things make so much sense now, and he has never hated himself more. For not seeing it sooner. For not allowing himself to care about this boy all along. For maybe even reenforcing this goddamn bullshit, making the kid think he is right, when he sure as shit ainât. He...
 He canât help how he moves. Swift and quick. He- he just needs to be near the kid, needs to hold him, reassure him that no, he didnât. Didnât at all. He needs to do what he should have done weeks ago, in the laundry room, and reassure that kid that no. He doesnât deserve to be hurt. Not... not ever...Â
 He stops, though, when he sees Taka look up at him, terror in his eyes, like he... he thinks Mondo is going to fucking hurt him. He wants to go forward, wants to hold the kid so fucking bad, but he doesnât have that fucking right, so he stays where he is, all the sorrow he feels surely reflected in his eyes. And as the kid looks at him, he... he relaxes. He still looks upset, but he doesnât look scared. That... thatâs something...
 Right?Â
 âNo. Fuckinâ no. Yâainât deserved any aâ that shit, goddamn, man⌠and I promise ya, Taka, Iâm gonna make sure ya see that one day, even if it takes the rest aâ my goddamn life. And thatâs a manâs promise.âÂ
 And he means it, fuck does he mean it. He had never meant anything more. He will spend the rest of his goddamn life ensuring that this wonderful kid knows how special and amazing he is, and that he never, ever deserves to be hurt. Itâs his lifeâs fucking goal now, the one thing that fucking matters. He will take care of Taka for the rest of his goddamn life, even after the kid finally wises up and leaves his ass. He will watch from the shadows, keeping a careful eye on him, there to keep him safe from all harm. This kid will never know pain again if itâs the last fucking thing Mondo does. He swears.Â
 As the kid looks at him, he sees the softest and most beautiful smile heâs ever seen lighting up the boyâs face. His eyes sparkle with it, and heâs looking at Mondo like heâs important again. Like he... like he matters. And Mondo...
 He wonât ruin this shit. He just... he wonât.Â
 This matters too goddamn much for him to let it slip away.Â
 âT-thank you... thank you, kyoudai. I... thank you.âÂ
 Mondo smiles gently at the kid, moving forward to tentatively wrap an arm around his shoulder, squeezing gently, needing to touch him but not wanting to overwhelm him, god.Â
 âAinât gotta thank me, bro. Now, we really should head ta bed. Got school tomorrow anâ I donât want my bro ta be tired! Come on, kyoudai. Letâs get goinâ.âÂ
 Taka nods quick and puts his jacket on, buttoning it with practiced fingers. The kid turns back to the locker, frowning gently at whatever he sees inside. Mondo watches as the kid reaches out and grabs it, his breath hitching when he sees the kid is holding the glasses case that started this whole fucking mess. He... he honestly had forgotten about that shit, to tell the truth, with all the drama that just occurred. But as he looks at the kid, who is looking so softly at the glasses case, like theyâre precious to him, he... he knows he owes the kid for the shit he put him through earlier, for no fucking reason. He canât quite find it in him to regret what happened, not when it ended up like this, but he... he has to make it up to the kid. All of it.Â
 So, quick as a wink, Mondo darts his hand out and carefully takes the case from Taka, ignoring the startled sound the kid makes. He can feel the kid watching him with wide eyes, but he doesnât let it stop him as he opens the case andâ without a single momentâs pauseâ puts the glasses on his face, blinking at the foreign feel. It... it hasnât changed his vision much, since this shit is only supposed to help with close up shit, but it... huh. He guesses it ainât so bad...Â
 âHuh... I guess they ainât that bad... tell me, kyoudai. How do they look?â
 He hadnât really meant to ask the question, but he just... couldnât help but remember the shit heâd done the last time heâd worn the glasses and Taka had told him what he thought. He... maybe he wants to show that itâs different, now. That he wonât get angry, not this time. To prove that he will never hurt Taka, never again. Not... not ever again.Â
 He watches as the kid flushes bright red, mouth open slightly again, and- and god, is it an attractive look on him... s-shit... and then the kid is smiling shakily, giving a shaky thumbs up, and thatâs even... even worse... or better, heh...Â
 âYou look amazing, kyoudai! They suit you well!âÂ
 A-amazing, huh? Shit... no oneâs ever said he looks amazing before... heâs had a couple of people call him hot, or even sexy once or twice, but never... never amazing...
 He adores it... adores... Taka...Â
 It makes him smile again. Soft. Happy. So goddamn happy... he will never be able to repay Taka for the happiness he gives him... not even if he dedicates the rest of his life to trying. Which he will. He... he will...
 But itâs late. So fucking late. They... they need to get to bed...
 Even if Mondo never wants to part from this amazing kid...
 âAh, cool. I guess. Now, câmon! Bed! Ainât gonna be the reason ya canât focus in class tomorrow, ya nerd!â
 With that, Mondo turns to grab his duster off the bench heâd tossed it on earlier, shrugging it on carefully, before finally exiting the bathhouse, Taka on his heels.Â
 Shit...
#The Problem with Mondo preview#Mondo Owada#Mondo's POV#Kiyotaka Ishimaru#Danganronpa#Danganronpa fanfiction#My fanfic#Ha hope y'all liked it#:-)
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good morning mutuals and everyone else on tumblr who is cool and made my year! this is gonna be my mutuals appreciation post 2020 because if anything good happened this year then it's getting to know all of you guys so there's that. i love you all so so sooo much and always love to see y'all and your gif sets / memes / crack posts /rants / edits and so on and so forth on my dash. you made this year beautiful and i just wanna thank u for that!đđ (also im sorry if the picture above activates anyone's fight response i just thought that it would fit if i went back to where it all started)
@engelkeijsers mare my love i don't even have words to describe how much i love you and am happy to have you in my life. i consider you one of my closest friends by now and that's why i always message you whenever exciting shit happens in my life (or whenever shit goes down that ofc dependsđ¤Ş). our phone calls were so fucking funny and i loved talking to you sooo much i can't wait to meet you in real life one day!!đ please feel hugged you're such a beautiful human.
@dreamaur ann my beloved mutual i love you from the bottom of my heart and just wanna thank you for being the cute bitch that u are who always remembers our mutuals anniversary like....đĽşđĽş i just love that we always watch and read and stan the same things like what kind of soulmutuals behavior is this?. can't wait for s&b to air so we can always freak out about kaz and inej and everyone else together. i'm kissing your cheek and wish you the absolute best for 2021 because u deserve the bestđ˝
@sotorubio silja i love you and your blog so much you just have such a galaxy brain and you're so eloquent and your blog is one of the few that i check on regularly because i don't wanna miss a single post you make. here's a fun fact before i properly got to know you i thought that you were sooo intimating i don't even know why and then we started talking at some point and i was like "hold on a second they are SO lovely and warm actually and not intimating at all hdhdh" as you might have figured out by now i always love talking to you about skames or rant about 13rw and everything else. i just love u!!!đ§Ą
@helmtaryn aurore you are probably the first person who ever started talking to me on here and so it all began and we always talked abt skam france before s6 started and during and you're just such a wonderful person!! thank you for always being there for me and helping me with my french homework i truly cannot thank you enough for that because you're constantly saving my ass jdhd. you're just so fun to talk to and such a talented gif maker like... for real your gif sets always knock me out and you're always so original in what you gifđĽşâŁ
@geminibf i know i've told you that before but your blog is my comfort blog on here literally just seeing your posts on my dash always makes my day and you're one of the most beautiful ppl i've ever known like how do you even manage to do thatđĽşđ plus you're sooo talented at this point im convinced that there's absolutely nothing that you cannot do so yeah i have no idea where this sentence is going but i guess what im trying to tell u is that i love u and im so happy to be ur friend
@alterlovex niiiiiâŁâŁâŁ you're not even like a tumblr mutual you're like my tumblr sister (figure out what the hell this is supposed to mean jdjd) and you were one of the first people who hyped my stupid posts up and it always made me go đĽşđ. i started following you despite the fact that u had a wtfock icon (honorary) and i absolutely never regretted it. you're so beautiful and warm and so is your blog and i will try to talk more to u again in 2021. im virtually sending you so many flowersđˇđťđ¸đ
@jorgecrespo you're just the coolest bitch alive. i followed you for your skam rankings and stayed for your whole entire personality. every post you make truly just slaps, you never miss, and i relate to you so much jdjd. the way you answer anon messages will forever be my favorite thing about your blog and just the way you talk in general like without even seeing your url i always know when it's you who wrote a post. i love youââđ
@jusdekiwi you and aurore are the reason why french people deserve rights, you are such a lovely and genuine person and i absolutely love you and your chill vibes on your blog. also thank you for helping me out with my french homework thingy once like. thank you so so much for being so lovely and taking your time julia!đť
@suburbanenigma carmen i love you and all of your posts and just the vibes on your blog!!! also omfg your riverdale side blog always makes me laugh soo much i truly cannot wait for s5 to air so we can make fun of it together because i will live blog the shit out of it too!! you're just one of the coolest bitches ever i don't know how else to say it. i love you and cant wait to talk to you more next year. you're such a blessing for this hellsiteđŚâ¨
@sundaymorninghangover julian you are one of my oldest friends on here and i've loved you ever since i found your blog and figured out that u were a part of the having taste club (skames fandom) too!! you're so chill!!! i love your brain!! i love your posts!!! and most importantly i love you. please keep on blessing my dash with your cool posts because they are definitely appreciated and loved in this house. also i miss your frog icon (please don't hit me in case it wasn't a frog) it just spoke volumes about your vibes but i love ur new one too!! still associate the purple heart with you so here it is đđ
@lesbeanfatou clara you simply are an angel. you used to have a nora grace icon and i went: that's it, she's the one, she has taste im gonna follow!! and look it was one of the best decisions ever. you're my favorite chaotic n cool mosquito hater and i just love you so much and you made my year beautiful!! thank you for always listening to me when i came into your inbox to have a break down (positive or negative) over the we feel in love in october girl and thank you for teaching me how make edits!!!đđ
@aoixe you're one of my favorite skamfr hate blogs and certain men hate blogs (if u know u know) i always love talking and ranting with you and am so glad that we're sometimes just dming!! you're vibes are so cool a d you seem like such a chill person i love you and wish you all the best for 2021!!âŁâŁ
@fatoudixon ana i love you and your blog so so much and especially your druck reaction videos on youtube!! you seem like such a genuine and beautiful person and even though we're not talking much please just know that im always happy to see you on my dash. happy new year to you!!đđ
@cash-queens sam𼺠you're so sweet and kind this hell site truly doesn't even deserve you but we all love that you're here anyway!! i would protect you with my life and i hope that we will get to talk more in 2021 because you're such a lovely person and for now im just gonna wish u a happy new yearâ¨
@avaceleste sophiaaađ you've been here ever since the very beginning of skamfr season 6 and i always love talking to you and long live our eliola jokes, you were probably the person i started this cult with so here is our eliola emoji starterpack one more time in 2020 đđ§đŹ
@hashtag-ohboy-nicetry i have no idea whose side blog this was but the url alone made my entire yearđ¤đ¤
@ random love anon⤠i love you and hope that 2021 will be a good year for you because you absolutely deserve it!!! wishing u nothing but the best i always love to see you around!đđ
all the other amazing blogs i love and am always happy to see on my dash (doesn't matter if we're mutuals or not)
@floraflorenzi / @bi-kieu-my / @gumptin / @thegirlnooneknows5 / @littleweirdoss / @sohereisthisasshole / @noramachwtz / @nori-in-pink / @ayellowcurtain / @mailinrichter / @ijzermanora / @fudgetunblr / @lesbianfatous / @norgestan / @cfgc / @avaspereira / @theflowerisblue / @smblmn / @jon-astronaut / @amiraamore / @parelmoer / @stqrz đâŁđđŚđđ¸
i wish all of you a very happy new year and thank you for all of your gifs, posts, translations, fanfics & edits you all truly make this place beautifulâđ
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Requested by: @fakeanimefanntnt
Pairing: Midoriya x reader
Warningsâ ď¸: None
Word Count: 3149
S/o That Comes From a Quirkless Country
You stepped off the plane in Masutafu, Japan. A beautiful town known for the famous UA High School.
You looked around the airport, nothing seemed really out of the ordinary from what you were you used to.
No one seemed to being breathing fire or levatating in mid air, even the people looked exactly like they did back home.
âWell I guess they still do have laws restricting their quirks, huh?â You muttered to yourself. You continued to walk towards the exit of the airport.
You were pretty tense, looking at all the people around you knowing that almost every single one of them possessed some kind of supernatural power and could use it in a moments time.
You had only heard of quirks in passing. When you were young, you almost didnât believe they were real.
Though as you grew up, it started to be discussed more and more in your life.
About how 80% of people had these abilities and how you were completely shut out from them all.
You see, the island you grew up on was one made of people who did not want to explore the extraordinary, who didnât want to explore the world of quirks.
They all had different reasons for coming to the island. For some, quirks were against their religion, some just didnât like the idea of quirks, others were born quirkless and came for escape from the constant torment that people would give them.
As for you, well you didnât really have a choice to be there. You were born under parents who didnât except what they called âfreaks of natureâ. They hated the idea of a quirkfull society and so they lived among people who felt the same as them.
Although, you didnât have a quirk yourself, you were definitely interested in them. You just didnât know whether you liked the idea of quirks or not.
It wasnât that they were bad, but they could definitely be used for not so good things and if you went into a society where you were completely defenseless from those sort of things, you could loose your life within a second.
Nonetheless, you still wanted to see them, they just fascinated you from the first time you heard of them.
So you took the steps to be able to foreign exchange in a town known for strong quirks. It wasnât much, but at least you could finally see what all the fuss was about.
Your parents were not happy with this, but you convinced them after years of begging and so now here you were, walking to the house you would be staying for the next few years.
As you walked down the street, occasionally looking down at your phone for directions, you noticed all the different buildings and places as well as the people you passed by.
Once again, you were met with nothing but what seemed normal.
âFor a place filled with super powers, youâd think there would be something a little more interesting.â You sighed to yourself, continuing on your journey to your place.
Though after about a half hour of walking, you sorta ran into a slight inconvenience.
âWhere the hell am I?â
Yup, you were completely lost. You looked at your surroundings to of course see unfamiliar buildings.
âDamn it, what purpose does a map app have if it only makes you confused!â You said under your breath as you started fidgeting with you screen, adjusting the map of your current area to see where you were.
âU-um... excuse me maâam, do you need some help?â A stranger asked, standing in front of you.
âAh! Yes, actually!â You looked up at the person to see a young man about your age.
He had green hair that was black at the roots, his eyes the same shade as his hair, and heâs had freckles which complimented his round shaped face.
His outfit was pretty plain. A white t-shirt that had the words ALL M on them. You guessed that was a reference to what you knew as the top hero in this place called All Might. He was also wearing cargo shorts, a pair of red shoes, and a yellow school bag strapped to his shoulders.
He was kinda... pretty... in a way. Though, you werenât going to admit that to yourself.
âUh...â you hesitated, realizing that you were staring at him. âI-Iâm kinda new here and Iâm just looking for my new place, but I got loss.â You chuckled at your own stupidity.
He told you itâs totally fine and that it could get a bit confusing navigating before asking you for the address.
You were a bit skeptical giving a random dude on the street your address, but you didnât get a bad feeling from him and he overall seemed like a kind person, so you decided that it would be better to trust him then try to find the place yourself.
You gave him the address and he smiled. âI recognize that street name. Itâs a about a twenty minute walk that way.â He pointed to your left. âDo you want me to walk you there or do you just want to go by yourself, I could give you more specific instructions?â He asked.
You considered the options. âWell if itâs not an issue, do you mind walking me their, Iâm not very good with directions.â You smiled awkwardly.
He nodded his head enthusiastically and started walking while motioning you to come with him.
You immediately started to trail him, an awkward silence following you guys.
âSo... whatâs your name?â You attempted to start a conversation.
âIzuku Midoriya, how about you?â
âIâm (Y/n) (L/n), nice to meet you Midoriya.â You smiled at him.
âSame here.â He replied. âSo where are from? You said you were new here right?â
You considered whether you should tell him or not, you had done quite a bit of research on the outside of your island and so you knew a lot about people from these countries, but you werenât sure how they felt about the people where you are from. For all you knww they could hate you.
âUm... well.â You hesitated. âDo you know about those countries where people live without quirks and such...?â You asked, hopefully seeing how he would react.
He looked at you with shocked eyes. âWait are you from one of them?!â He shouted.
âWell... yeah, I am. Specifically Hakosaka Island.â You looked away from him in fear of his response.
âSeriously!!! Thatâs so cool!â You turned to him with a shocked expression, a blush coated your cheeks.
Though to your surprise, he started rummaging through his bag and brought out a notebook and pen.
âDo you have a quirk yourself? Is the technology different there? Why did you decide to live there? Have you ever seen someone use a quirk? Why did you leave? Do you have certain rules of leaving the island? Do you get to see quirks on tv or in books? What are the people like there?â
One after another, questions started leaving the boys mouth and despite you not saying a word, he had already started writing something down in his notebook.
Although it was a bit sudden and overwhelming, it wasnât bad by any means. You were just glad he didnât hate you or anything.
You giggled a bit. âUh... how about we stop by my place so I could drop off my stuff. Then we could maybe go to a teashop or something and I could answer your questions.â
He noticed what he started doing and immediately blushed. âOh my- Iâm so sorry, I have a habit of doing this.â He fiddled with his pen. âThough, if you donât mind, could we please do that. Iâve never met someone from a quirkless society.â He smiled at you.
You nodded to him as you guys continued walking while making other small talk.
Once you had gotten to your place, you insisted on Midoriya coming in, but he refused and said that heâll just wait for you outside.
So you made your way into the house, it was your first time there and the place was pretty nice from what you can see, but you made sure not to check it out just yet since you didnât want to keep the boy waiting.
So you sat down all the bags that you were carrying and made your way back outside.
âYou ready?â You asked him as you approached him. He gave a quick âyesâ before you guys started to make your way down the sidewalk.
âDo you know any cafes around here?â You asked.
âSure! Thereâs one a couple blocks away.â He told you and you gave him an âokayâ before walking along side him as he led the way.
You had only met the guy about thirty minutes ago, but for some reason you felt oddly comfortable around him, like he was an old friend
He just seemed so caring and kind, like you could easily trust him with your life. It was just a warmth that you have never felt from another person and you could tell he was incredibly special.
You snapped out of your thoughts as the two of you turned a corner that led you to the cafe.
Once you guys got in the cozy looking cafe, you both sat down at an empty table before going to order. You got your favorite drink and Midoriya just got a tea. You guys then went to sit down again.
âAnyway, what did you want to ask me?â You asked and the boy immediately started asking you multiple questions about your island and you yourself, all while simultaneously writing the information down. By the time you guys were done, it had already been an hour and a half.
âI think thatâs all I have. Thank you so much, you really didnât need to do this for me.â He bowed his head slightly.
âItâs no problem, though do you think I could ask you a few questions as well?â
âOf course.â He replied.
You grinned at the beaming male. âI guess Iâll start with, do you have a quirk?â
He nodded. âYup! Itâs pretty much a super power quirk, I can enhance my puches, kicks, or jumps.â
âWow! Thatâs so cool!â You beamed.
He chuckled. âYeah, I would show you, but I canât unless thereâs an emergency of course.â He told you, you already knew this information, but there was something a bit off with it.
âWait, what do you mean in an emergency? I thought you canât use quirk in public at all. I mean, unless youâre a hero.â Maybe you were just over thinking it, but you needed to know this information if you were going to be living here.
Midoriya looked a little shocked about how much you knew on quirks. âOh! Yeah, youâre right, but Iâm actually a hero in training and I have my provisional license, so as long as there is an emergency, I can use my quirk freely in public.â He revealed, rubbing the back of his neck in an awkward manner.
Your jaw dropped for a second. âHero in training.â Doesnât that mean that he goes to a hero school. Wait, but if were in Masutafu and he goes to a hero school, does that mean that heâs a student a UA High. Like the greatest hero school of all time.
You shook your head lightly, for all you know he could be going to a different school and just was visiting here.
Even so, it was pretty coincidental that you met a hero in training on your first hour here. Whatâs the chances of that really?
âW-woah seriously, thatâs so cool! What school do you train at?â You asked him.
His face turned red by the pure admiration and curiosity in your voice. âI-I go to UA.â He replied.
âThatâs incredible!!! You must be super strong then!â You smiled so wide in an innocent manner.
âAha, t-thank you.â He was pretty much a tomato at this point with all the praise he was receiving from you.
âItâs pretty cool, though do to recent villain attacks, we actually have to live on campus.â He paused for a second, thinking about something.
âW-which reminds me that itâs almost time for curfew to end. I think I have to go. I-I mean, I still have time to drop you off at your place if you need me to.â He offered.
âOh okay. If you donât mind, that would be great!â You smiled.
After that, you both got up and made your way out the cafe and down the street.
You asked Midoriya a couple more questions about his school and such and he answered them happily.
Though, as you guys were approaching you house, disaster struck.
From a store that you guys just walked by, an explosion erupted from the inside. You saw people running from the burning building while screaming in fear.
You on the other hand, just stood there, completely frozen. You didnât even notice Midoriya running into the store to help evacuate people.
You werenât sure how to react to this, you werenât even sure what was happening. All you could do was stare.
After a few moments, someone walked out of the store, the person was a middle aged man and floating right above his hand was a small ball of flames.
You knew this was a quirk, but actually seeing it with your own eyes was a whole other expirence and not a good one to say the least.
It was terrifying, thinking that a quirk can cause so much distruction and bring the fear out in so many people.
You noticed just how defenseless you were against these powers, how you could loose your life so easily in this world.
What were you doing here? You didnât belong here.
The man turned to you and started making his way to where you were, a sinister grin on his face as his palm ignighted even more aggressive flames.
He started taunting you in some sort of way, but you couldnât hear the taunts, all you could hear was your pounding heart beat and some sort of ringing in your ears.
Everything went so slow. You breaths were ragged and sweat formed on your face. You couldnât move or say anything.
You were beyond horrorfied and as the man approached you step by step.
All you could think was how you wished you stayed home. How you wished that you never went out of your safe and secure island. How could people live like this?
â(L/n)!!!â You heard a shout from your side before seeing green sparks all around you as everything else blurred
In a seconds notice you were in Midoriyaâs arms out of the villainâs sight.
âAre you okay? The Pros will be here soon so letâs get you out of here.â You heard the boy speak down at you, but you couldnât process a words he was saying.
You just stared at him with wide eyes as a green sparks from earlier shrouded the two of you. Was this his quirk? Was that why you were moving to fast?
So many thoughts circled through your head, it was so overwhelming and you were sure what to do.
What did you get yourself into?
As soon as Midoriya saw the expression on your face, one of total fear and shock, he understood the situation.
This was your first time ever seeing a quirk and it wasnât very pleasant experience either. No wonder you were horrified.
âItâs okay, youâre going to be okay (L/n).â He tried to reassure you as he started running with his quirk all the way to your home.
As soon as he made it, he set you down on the front yard of the house. You wobbled and would have fallen if Midoriya didnât catch you.
âWoah there!â He steadied you and waited until you were in a stable condition.
âAre you okay?â He asked, looking into your eyes with concern.
âI-I donât know.â You confessed.
âEverythingâs okay, weâre away from the danger, can I see your keys so I could let you in?â He asked.
It took you a second to register what he said, but as soon as you did, you fumbled in your pocket for your keys. You handed them to him and he led you inside.
As soon as you got in, he sat you down on a unpacked box and went to go a glass of water for you.
You, on the other hand was finally getting out of your momentary shock and as soon Midoriya returned with water, you took it from him and gulped the entire cup down.
âIâm sorry.â You told the boy, ashamed of your actions.
He shook his head while crouching down beside you. âDonât be, it must have been terrifying to see a quirk for the first time. Especially being used against youâ You nodded to his phrase.
âBut the Pro Heroes will handle it, he wasnât a very strong villain anyways.â
âI-I just never thought I would be so weak against them. M-maybe I should go back home. I donât think I can live here.â You stuttered realize just how scary this world is.
âI understand where youâre coming from. If you want to go back to your island, thatâs all up to you and I have no right to say otherwise, but...â he hesitated before grasping your hands and looking into your eyes.
âQuirks are not just used for distruction, their is a whole other beautiful side to quirks and I think you would love it if you just explored it!â He beamed, sqeezing your hands slightly.
âSo how about you stick around, you could meet my friends in school, and my teachers. We could go to all the quirk museums together and we could train together to get you stronger. Like I said, if you want to go home you can, but you could also stay here and Iâll make sure to be with you the entire time so you wonât have to worry! What do you say?â Midoriyaâs eyes sparkled as he anticipated your reply.
You stared at him, all of a sudden your heart beat increased and you felt a flutter travel through you stomach as you stared into the boyâs emerald like eyes.
What was this feeling?
âI guess it wouldnât be that bad.â Your words were shaky, but you smiled at him lightly.
He smiled as well and nodded. âThen Itâs settled. How about I give you my number and we could hang out on my next off day.â He said letting, go of your hands and getting up from his crouched position.
âYeah. Sounds like a plan.â You replied.
#Hila Writes#bnha#mha#izuku midoriya#midoriya izuku#boku no hero academia#deku#my hero academia#midoriya#izuku#midoriya x reader#izuku x reader#deku x reader#izuku midoriya x reader#midoriya izuku x reader#request#mutuals#x reader#bnha x reader#mha x reader
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Reaction: [ S t r a y K i d s ] finding out their s/o is a [ S u p e r n a t u r a l C r e a t u r e ]
"...hi it's the anon from yesterday! so I'm not sure what way you do your reactions but something i haven't seen yet but would like to is a reaction to finding out that either their s/o or friend, whichever you'd prefer, is a supernatural creature (like werewolf, fae, witch, shape shifter, mermaid, demon, angel, anything really) for stray kids!
let me know if I didn't give you info that you need for a reaction or... if there are any problems with my request, I'm kind of shooting blindly since you don't have rules or anything right? so yea, i hope this is fine tho..."
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[ C h a n ] finds out youâre an [ A n g e l ]
His initial reaction: Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [ C o n c e r n e d ]
^ heâs logical, fair and patientâheâs known for having a logical minds and a fair judgment. He strives for fairness and justice constantly. This makes him a  wonderful mediator. Heâll analyze every situation with his little legal eagle brain and logical mind; with the help of that he can organize all things well and eliminate the irrelevant. So when you finally admit to being an angel, show him your wings, heâll most like keep quiet.Â
^ also, heâs a great listenerâheâll most definitely listen to your side of the story before making any irrational decisions about your relationship. This goes back to his logical, fair and patient way of thinking; heâll most likely just sit there quietly and let you do the talking, the explaining. ^ he soaks up all the ideas and information around him like a big brainy sponge. He hates conflicts and confrontations and always watches his words while communicating, talking in a way as to not offend you. When he finally does say something, his words will be well thought out, calculated.
^ he always knows a lot more than he lets on, most likely he already knew you were abnormalâa bit differentâfrom the very start of your relationship. And he was just waiting for you to get comfortable enough to admit it to him, to officially let him in on the secret.
^ heâs very understanding. Heâs very thoughtful and interprets things that most people miss out on. This will be beneficial to you when you begin to try and explain to him why you kept this a huge secret for such a long time. Heâll see that it, your unwillingness to tell anybody your origin story, has nothing to do with him not being worthy of knowing. He wonât take it personally.
^ heâll tell you like it is, straight up, because heâs an honest and upfront person. Heâll wait until youâve finished explaining and when you question him on his thoughts and feelings in the moment, he wonât sugar coat itâwhich can be both good and bad.
^ but, also, he can smell bullshit from a mile away. If you omit any significant details, or lie in any way, he will catch on almost instantly. And he wonât be happy.
^ heâs loyal to the bone and fiercely protective of you; finding out youâre an angel wonât change that. If anything, heâll feel even more protective of both you and your secret. ^ heâll forgive but never forget. Even though he wonât show it on the surface, heâll be extremely hurt that it took you so long to tell him. Logically he knows it has nothing to do with him, but emotionally it will feel like you just donât trust him enough. Heâll forgive you for keeping such a monumental secret, but heâll never forget that feeling. But once he listens to your story, does his own research, his concern for you will outweigh those hurt feelings.
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âSo I did some research,â he trailed off, you jerked at the echo of his voice in the otherwise silent room.
âResearch? On what?â you gaze over at him, not quite meeting his eyes.
âYou. Well, angelâs in general, but mostly you.â his voice is much lower, the silence drags on for a moment too long. Itâs suddenly stifling.Â
âAnd?â you breath out, still caught off guard.
âWhat does Ăloa mean?â he questions, taking a step around the bed to face you, get a better look. You narrowed your gaze, heart suddenly in your throat. How did he find that name? Did he know? Was he just testing you? You take a deep breath, eyes dropping down to the carpet beneath his bare feet. You decide to just answer him, literally. âItâs the name of an angel.â He tilts his head, contemplatively. And there is something dangerous in his eyes, something you canât quite place. âIâve never heard of him.â âYou wouldnât have.â you pull the blanket closer to you, resisting the sudden urge to spread your wings, stretch them wide and flee. âWas he a fallen angel?â his eyes are darker now, assessing, he definitely knows. You know he knows. So why wasnât he saying? âShe was, yes.â you hesitate, not wanting to give too much of your past away, but unable to stop yourself. âLucifer tricked her into falling from heaven.â âTricked her how?â he was still standing above you, he wouldnât approach you, hasnât since the night he caught you in full form. You meet his gaze. âShe fell in love with him.â His eyes narrowed, his face pulled into a grimace. How disgusting must it feel to find out your girlfriend is not only a fallen angel, but also a fallen angel who was once in love with Lucifer. You shrink, your wings drawing in closer to your body. âDid he love her?â Like an addict loves his addiction, you think, bitterly.. âThe only way he knew how.â He must have been able to see the pain in your eyes because, for a moment, pure concern crossed his features. He shook his head, schooling his expression once again. âHow could he trick her?â âHe never told her his name.â you whisper, your voice breaking. And suddenly he wasnât across the room, standing above you at a distanceâhe was right in front of you, knee on the bed, arms around your shoulders. âShhh, itâs okay, we donât have to talk about it now.â He reached forward to cup your cheek, the touch surprising you. "Please understand that no matter what you are or what has happened in your past, I am yours. I am devoted to you above all else, including my own life."
You exhaled after holding your breath for what felt like forever, tears spilling over in excess. "That's pretty heavy, Chan." His expression was impassioned, and the backs of his fingers brushed the side of your neck, thumbs wiping away the wetness on your cheeks. "It is a burden I am glad to carry.â â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨
[ C h a n g b i n ] finds out youâre a [ W e r e w o l f ]
His initial reaction:                            [ C u r i o u s ] ^ heâs kind and protective. He feels responsible and is always willing to help you out when youâre in need. He will go to great lengths to make sure that you feel loved and youâre happy. He will always stand up for the underdog, (no werewolf pun intended.) This is beneficial to you because his compassionate heart will win out over his logical mindset.Â
 ^ heâs extremely loyal. If thereâs one trait imbedded in him, it is his loyalty. He physically wonât be able to turn his back on youâwerewolf or not.
^ heâs also very honest. He tends to be extremely direct and straightforward with you. He gives honest feedback to you when you ask for it. He would never speak a white lie just to avoid conflict, or be deemed reasonable, so you wouldnât have to worry about him bottling up his true thoughts, opinions and emotions on the subject.Â
 ^ that being said, his honesty often comes off as excessive bluntness. Therefore, at first, you might catch some heat in that department.Â
^ he, at times, can be very inflexible. When he has committed to something, in this case a way of thinking, heâll fight tooth and nail to stick to that way of thinking. Regardless of how much proof he has in front of him, it will be difficult to convince him otherwiseâespecially when he grew up believing that werewolves were myth, not real.
^ once he has a significant amount of proof, though, heâll be insanely curious on the matter and his crazy sense of humor will resurface.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
âWait, are you an alpha? An omega? Do you turn when you feel threatened?â his wide eyes, his random questioningâit all catches you off guard.
âIâm considered a dominant amongst my pack. And, yes, I guess I would if I felt threatened.â you nod slowly, holding his gaze. Youâre the werewolf here, the freak of nature, but this boyâthis humanâis the weird one.Â
âWhatâs a dominant? Are they more important than a submissive?â he crawls closer to you, his jeans catching on the carpet beneath you.
âNot necessarily. A submissive wolf is not incapable of protecting themselves: they can fight, they can kill as readily as any other. They are a treasure in a pack, just as important. A source of purpose and of balance.â you catch yourself quoting your great grandmother, the very first female dominant in your pack, a rare, smart, capable wolf.
âThen why does the dominant wolf exist? If a submissive wolf is just as capable, just as important, why make the distinction?â he interjects, your baffled at his level of curiosity.
âBecause even through submissives are just as capable and important, theyâre very different. Itâs a dominants job to protect those beneath them.â you pause momentarily, watch a multitude of expressions cross his face. âProtecting a submissive is far more rewarding because a submissive will never wait until you are wounded or your back is turned to see if you are truly dominant to them. Submissive wolves can be trusted. And they unite the pack with the goal of keeping them safe and cared for.â
There is a long moment where you just stare at each other, his eyes glazed over, a childlike expression on his face. âSo youâre a werewolf trapped in a human body?â
You stifle a laugh, unable to control your facial expression. "Well, yeah, that's kind of the definition."
"No, really. Youâre trapped?â his eyes widen slightly, he leans forward, anticipating your answer.
"Oh? Are you trying to ask me the last time I shifted?" you voice, confusion written all over your face.
âYes.â he nods enthusiastically. You briefly debate telling him about the traffic incident, but ultimately decide against lying.
âOn your birthday.â you admit, sheepishly. âThere was a lot of traffic and I was running late.â you trail off, suddenly awkward. But then he laughs, big and loud, throwing his head back.
âThatâs so cool! I want to be a werewolf. How do I get a werewolf to attack me?" he smiles wide. And you roll your eyes, shake your head in pseudo disappointment. âStand in the middle of a forest under a full moon with a raw steak tied to your face, holding a sign that says, 'Eat me; I'm stupid'?â
â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨
[ H y u n j i n ] finds out youâre a [ M e r m a i d ]
His initial reaction: Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [ P r a c t i c e d ]
^ heâs very empathetic with a lively imagination and a friendly disposition. He has a boundless capacity for empathy even with those who he barely sees eye to eye with. This is great for you because, even if he is initially angry that you kept such a secret from him, heâll still empathize with your situation, your story.
^ heâs more emotional than your average guy. He is intune and prone to the infectious emotion of those around him. If he see tears, he will likely cry. If he can sense hurt in your voice, it will sadden him also.Â
^ he will love you unconditionally no matter what or who you are. ^ heâs selfless and generous. No matter how big the secret, how hurt he is from your omission, he will always be there when you need someone. Because he is so practiced in the idea that he canât live without you, he will always show up when you need him.
^ that being said, because of his idealistic nature, you can often find him walking alone. He can be overly trusting and it often leaves him feeling betrayed, hurt and vulnerable. He might view your lack of openness, truthfulness, as a betrayal within your relationship. And that might make conversation with him, for a while, very stilted. Heâll seem impassive at first, but he will eventually warm back up to you.
^ heâs not one to give up easily. He puts in the work to get what he wants in life and he wonât let it slide away without a fight. He wonât let you go over something like this, not after heâs just got you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There, with bare feet and drenched hair, you were crouched like a child. Upon hearing him approach, you looked up, peered into his dark, hesitant eyes. You wore only an enormous menâs sweater, his sweaterâwith no extravagant pattern or color, the sweater was a dull beige. Your knees were pulled up inside of it, thin pale ankles peeking out from underneath. The wool sweater alone was dry, as the rest of your head, hands, and feet were as wet as if youâd just been pulled from drowning. Tiny rivers flowed off your hair and pooled on the wool sweater, leaving it dark in splotches. Water droplets glistened on your skin, not running off, as though they couldnât quite bear to leave you. His eyes held yours in a way his hands did not. His empathetic gaze schooled, his expression practiced, controlled.
âSo...a mermaid?â you twist your head the other direction, his voice breaking your concentration momentarily. At this he took a sudden step forward, as if compelled. He had caught a glimpse of pink gills under your chin, his busy eyes dancing along your neck with a new found curiosity. You became overwhelmingly self conscious, tucking your chin, keeping your neck hidden from his view. It had always taken your gills longer to disappear than your tail.Â
âMy mother told me stories of mermaids. She said they sometimes sing to humans to lure them underwater.â his voice trailed off, momentarily. âBut you have a horrible voice.â your gaze snaps up, catching the mischievous look in his eye, his grin.
His teasing catches you off guard, you fumble with your words, âYeah, well...I've been practicing. Want to hear?â you glare at him, halfheartedly.
He lets out a soft laugh, âI'm always happy when I'm surrounded by water, I think I'm a Mermaid too...or at least, I was a mermaid in a past life.â he crouches down, heâs much closer to you now.
âAre you in pain?â you choke out, the idea of him hurting, in any way, unbearable to you. You donât know why you asked that, heâs obviously just jokingâkeeping a steady conversation with you, trying to keep you calm.
âPain? Why would I be inââ he trails off, eyes snapping in your direction. âWait, are you in pain?â the absolute, genuine concern in his voice has you pulling up short. Your breathing shallow.
âMermaids hurt when weâre in human form.â you admit, quietly, eyes glued to the rocks on the horizon.
âBut...but you never look like youâre in pain, youâre always smiling, always so...gracefulââ he cuts himself off abruptly, eyes narrowed. Itâs as if heâs angry at himself for not catching on to your discomfort much sooner. âWhat does it feel like?â
âWhen your tail divides and shrinks until it becomes legs, itâs very painful. It feels as if a sharp sword is slashing through you. Everyone who sees a mermaid on legs will say that they are the most graceful human being theyâve ever laid eyes onââ you remember, vividly, all the times you were complemented for your gliding movement; not even a seasoned dancer is able to tread as lightly as you. âBut every step you take feels as if you are treading upon knife blades so sharp that blood must flow.â
There is silence, the ocean waves brushing against the sand, caressing the shoreâitâs the only noise you hear for a moment.Â
âThen shall I take you home and put you in the bathtub?â his unsystematic question is enough to pull you out of your thoughts completely, his brand of humor easily calming you in your panicked state. Youâre suddenly very thankful.
âHow do you always know just what to say?" you ask, a smile on your lips. His laugh rumbles through you as he puts his arm around your damp shoulders. "Practice, I guess."
You pull back and give him a quizzical look.
"I spent three years imagining what I would say to you if you were mine," he says, tugging you closer. âI should hope I know what to say now that I've finally got you.â â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨
[ J i s u n g ] finds out youâre a [ D e m o n ]
His initial reaction: Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [ B e w i l d e r e d ]
^ heâs very intelligent and heâs always ready to expand his knowledge reserves. He usually has a systematic approach to life, he always ensures that he doesnât miss any loophole behind. So when he finds out about you being a demon, heâs both bewildered and inquisitive.
^ heâs usually very calm and collected on the surface. But underneath he has a great intensity that demands he bring order to his world. He struggles with the need to rearrange his frantic interior beneath the calm exterior until everything is perfect. This might make him seem more freaked out, frightened, than he actually is.
^ he is highly patient with you and always tries to find the good in everything around him. So in reality, even though he initially seems frazzled at your confession, he will actually give you enough time to fix up your actâexplain yourselfâwhen need be.
^ he can, at times, be very judgmental. He tends to appraise and judge people based on one particular viewpoint in that personâs lifeâespecially if he doesnât know that person well enough. That being said, your relationship is solid enough to outlast his initial judgment.
^ he can also be very fussy, as sometimes he gets lost in the details. His strong likes and dislikes make him quite finicky at first. And heâll definitely feel some type of way that you kept him in the dark for so long. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ All the demons of Hell formerly reigned as gods in previous cultures. No it's not fair, but one man's god is another man's devil. As each subsequent civilization became a dominant power, among its first acts was to depose and demonize whoever the previous culture had worshipped. The Jews attacked Belial, the god of the Babylonians. The Christians banished Pan and Loki, the respective deities of the ancient Greeks and Celts. The Anglican British banned belief in the Australian aboriginal spirits known as the Mimi. Satan is depicted with cloven hooves because Pan had them, and he carries a pitchfork based on the trident carried by Neptune. As each deity was deposed, it was relegated to Hell. For gods so long accustomed to receiving tribute and loving attention, of course this status shift put them into a foul mood.
And when Hell, itself, was in a foul mood, demonsâspecifically the ones planted here on earthâgot the brunt of it. So to say you were in a bad mood would be an understatement. In hindsight, it might not have been the best decision on your part to agree to speak with Jisung about your origins in that moment.
âItâs not fair.â his voice wavers, the emotional confrontation taking a toll on him.
âWhat, that Iâm a demon or that you managed to date me?â you bit out, tersely. âDonât.â his voice was abruptly dark.Â
âNo, youâre right, itâs not fairâbut what makes earth feel like Hell is your expectation that it should feel like Heaven. Earth is earth. Dead is dead. Good is rarely good and bad is always bad. Youâll find out for yourself soon enough. It wonât help the situation for you to get all upset.â you snap back at him, voice just as dark.
ââWhatâs that supposed to mean? Are you threatening me now?â his eyes narrow.
âHow miserably hypocritical,â you respond with a growl. âYou think itâs such a burden for you to be tricked into dating the devils servant? What about the burden of me being me?â your voice is much lower now, your practically spitting venom in his direction. âNo sooner am I offered a chance to flee Hell than I yearn to stay.â
âI didnât want this.â his dark eyes, his bewildered gaze reflecting a huge amount of regret.
âFew families hold their relations as closely as do prisons. Few marriages sustain the high level of passion that exists between criminals and those who seek to bring them to justice. Itâs no wonder the Zodiac Killer flirted so relentlessly with the police. Or that Jack the Ripper courted and baited detectives with hisâor herâcoy letters. We all wish to be pursued. We all long to be desired. Thatâs what I did, I pursued you, I desired you. Anything beyond that is your fault.â you turn, ready to flee out the door, the overwhelming urge to hurt something, someone, frightening you.
âMy fault!? Is it my fault that I want you? That I want that feeling of standing with you against all odds and succeeding? That I want it so bad, Iâd risk destroying everything Iâve worked for?â he spits at your back, crossing the room in a long stride to block your path to the door. âIs that my fault? I should walk away. But all I want to do is follow you, out that door, down the street, all the way back to hell.â his fists are clenched, his face red, youâve never seen him so frustratedâwith you or himself. âWhat the hell am I doing, falling in love with a demon?â His sudden confession almost knocks you from your feet. Anger and confusion painting his face.
âYou love me?â you whisper in a fit of shock.
âYes.â he whispers right back, voice matching yours, as if his own confession shocked him as well.
âEnough to follow me all the way to hell?â youâre baffled.
âWell, according to Google, 98.3 percent of lawyers end up in Hell. That's in contrast to the 23 percent of farmers who are eternally damned. Some 45 percent of retail business owners are Hellbound, and 85 percent of computer software writers.â he hums to himself, pausing in thought. âPerhaps a trace number of musicians ascend to Heaven, but statistically speaking, 100 percent of them are cast into the fiery pit. As are essentially 100 percent of journalists and redheads.â he finishes with a satisfied nod. âReadheads?â you cock your eyebrow, completely thrown by the turn of conversation.
âWhat? I told you! I googled it.â he smiles, oddly proud of himself.
â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨
[ F e l i x ] finds out youâre a [ V a m p i r e ]
His initial reaction: Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [ P l a y f u l ]
^ like Jisung, heâs appears very calm and collected on the surface; he will struggle with his external facade and his internal need demanding order. This might make him seem very impassive in the moment, as he tends to shut down when confronted with mixed and conflicting emotions.
^ he has an analytical mind that can see things in black and white. He is capable of finding solutions to tough problems, always. He has a keen attention to detail, and likes to absorb everything before making a decision. So he will probably, like Chan, be very quiet and expressionless during your confession.
^ he has a very clever mind. And he will go through all possible elements of thinking before making any decisionâso you wonât have to worry about fear, disgust or uncertainty driving him to make an impulsive decision about your relationship.
^ heâs very honest with you, he will always tell you exactly how he feel about youâto your face. He doesnât like to sugar coat his words. For him, honesty is the best policy, even if the truth hurts. So when he does settle his mind, his inner conflict, enough to respond to you articulatelyâyou might experience some unintentional savagery, but it most definitely will not last for long.
^ heâs pretty old school, a bit conservative and old fashioned. Heâs not really into modern changes and prefers things in their old traditional ways. This is beneficial to you, in the given situation, because you are much much older than you seem. Your aura brings that old fashioned feel, and he will still appreciate thatâeven after realizing why.
^ once he wraps his head around the concept, around the idea of you being a vampire and living off of blood, heâll be extremely playful. Heâll love to tease you, and honestly, heâs the type to be into a little blood play.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
âYeah, I get it, you're a vampire," he said. "Creepy. And okay, a little hot, I admit."Â
"You don't mean that." you gape in his direction. "Come on. I still like you, you know, even if you... crave plasma." You blink once, twice, and itâs as if youâve never seen him before. âYou what?"
"Like. You." Felix enunciated slowly, as if you might not know the words. "Idiot. I always have. What, you didn't know? Weâre literally dating." he sounded cool and grown-up about it, but you saw the hectic color in his cheeks, under the moonlight.
"How clueless are you? Does it come with the fangs?" he sniffs, eyes darting around him, never really settling on you.
"I guess I...I just thought.... I donât know. I just didn't think...You're kind of intimidating, you know." you finally admit. "I'm intimidating? Me? Youâre the vampire here!â he spluttered out. "You're the one who's intimidating. I mean, come on. All that power, and you look... Well, you know how you look."Â
"How do I look?" you were fascinated now, you moved a little closer to him on the couch. He laughed nervously. "Oh come on. You're a total model-babe."Â
"You're kidding." you deadpan, completely caught off guard.
"You don't think you are?" he shot back at you, side eyeing your expression. You shook you head."Then you're kind of an idiot. Smart, but an idiot." he crossed his arms, momentarily lost in though. âSo? What exactly do you think about me, except that Iâm intimidating?â he questioned after a moment of silence.
âI think youâreâŚyouâreâŚah, interesting?â your the one tripping over your words now. If you were capable of blushing, youâd be beet red. âI think youâre kind of beautiful...for a human. And really, really strange.â You look away, keeping your eyes on the opposite wall.
âBeautiful? But Iâm a boy.â he whines.
âBoys can be beautiful too, itâs not subjective to one gender. Besides, beauty is a state of beingâitâs insideânot just physical attractiveness.â you reprimand him for his narrow mindedness.
He smiled and looked down, the color in his face deepened. âThanks for that,â he murmured, âI thought you only considered me to be bratty.â
âWell, to be fair, you are bratty.â you smile, peeking at him out of the corner of your eye.
âHey!â he gasps, affronted.
âWhat? You can be bratty and beautiful,â you shot back, repeating yourself once more. âI think itâs interesting.â There was a beat of silence, âSo, your not scared of me? You donât hate me?â you whispered into the dark room. Before he could even open his mouth to reply, you continue, âI have been stabbed, shot, burned, bitten, beaten unconscious too many times to count, and even staked. None of those would hold a candle to the pain Iâd feel if you hated me, if you were scared.â
His dark eyes find you in the light of the moon, his hand reaching out to intertwine with your. He opens his mouth, closes it and opens it once moreâas if trying to articulate his feelings properly, as if trying to find the words. âThat's pretty hot," his deep voice carries in the otherwise quiet room.
"What? Me being staked?" you admonished, unprepared for the turn of conversation.
"Well, no. Of course not. I meant the idea of getting rough with you is hot. I'm a big fan of full-contact sports." he wiggled his eyebrows in your direction, his voice playful, and you couldnât help but laugh. Throwing your head back, you squeezed his hand, âI'm sure you are.â â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨
[ J e o n g i n ] finds out youâre a [ N y m p h ]
His initial reaction: Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [ D e l i g h t e d ]
^ heâs incredibly open-minded and tends to think and do things differently than others. He thinks for himself and likes to keep an open mind about all things. Heâs not the type to judge a book by its cover. So you wonât need to worry about any judgment being thrown your way.
^ heâs a true free spirit, meaning any attempts to keep him from being who he really is will make him turn away. This is great, because he has learned to treat others as he wishes to be treated; he wonât ask you to suppress who you are, or change in any way, for the fear that you might do the same to him.
^ heâll most likely need some space and freedom to work through his thoughts on your unusual upbringing. However, he will be very vocal about exactly why he needs space, as to avoid any miscommunication. He would never up and leave you for being open and honest with him and he wouldnât want you to think otherwise.
^ like Jisung, he is also quite the intellectual. He can amaze anyone with his original ideas; this is great because, right off the bat, he will be so overwhelmed with curiosity, overflowing with questions, he wonât have the time to be upset with you.
^ sure, heâs a bit of an intellectual rebel and he will loudly defend his opinions, but heâs also willing and open to learning. Ultimately, telling him youâre a forest nymph will be like telling him you had grapefruit for breakfast. He has a great power to form and understand abstract concepts and conform and adapt to new information like heâs known it his whole lifeâlike itâs no big deal.
^ heâll be delighted with your honesty, insanely curious and extremely playful.
^ heâs also very stubborn at times. It is often hard to change his mind about something once it is set for. But youâre close enough to actually succeed in this area, an area which others have failed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ You wake up suddenâa chill crawling down your spineâin a puddle of cool sunlight. Your hands asleep beside you, your hair draped on the lawn like a mantle of cloth. Frost grows on the window glass, forming whirlpool patterns of lovely translucent geometry, and you stare up, momentarily forgetting where you are. Sitting up slowly, you lean forward and breath on the glass, giving the frost more ammunition. Now the winter nymphs can build castles and cities and whole ice continents with your breathâs vapor. In a few blinks you can almost see them moving in, ready to do their seasonal damage to your lovely forest, to your home. Thatâs when you hear it, a shift in the cool grass. And suddenly heâs right there, crouched down beside you. He rocks forward, and hisses in an attempt to scare you out of your thoughts. But you knew he was there the entire time, you could sense his presence. He could never truly sneak up on you in the forest, not with the many trees and plants and animalsâthe many eyes and ears.
You turn to him, with a bored expression, âReally? Thatâs all you got?â
You stretch your wings, hear their crackle, as a show of complete content.
âNot fair! How did you know? I was really quiet this time!â he pouts, whining about how unfair it is. âAlso, why are you out here? Itâs kind of cold.â he finally sits down, pulling his knees up to his chest.
You shrug your shoulders, resisting the urge to smile. Thereâs a pause, a beat of silence, where you both gaze up at the outer side of the house; the windows covered in frost catching your attention, yet again. And then you feel his gaze on you.
âItâs nice.â he whispers and you turn your head to face him, confused.
âThat you exist.â he smiles at you and you feel your heart drop.
âI think humans donât want merely to see beauty...we want something else which can hardly be put into wordsââ he cuts himself off, momentarily, watching your face carefully. âWe want to be united with the beauty we see, to pass into it, to receive it into ourselves, to become part of it. I think thatâs why we have peopled air and earth and water with gods and goddesses, and nymphs and elves.â he trails off again, and youâre left speechless. His dark eyes catching on the curves and lines of your face. And then the moment is broken, he looks away, back up at the frost bitten windowsill. But your heart still thumps in your throat. âAnd this is nice," he begins with a sigh. "Like...one of those paintings where a nymph or Athena is drawing the gods and goddesses." your eyes follow his gaze back up to the windowsill, you see that heâs referring to the intricate designs hidden within the frost. Winter nymphs have a tendency to hide such patterns, such art, in their work.
You hum in agreement. âAnd here I was thinking you were an utterly uneducated human," you said teasingly.
"I am a student," he responded with hauteur. "I am classically educated.â
"Plus, nymphs are pretty," he adds, in after thought.
You laugh. "I could stare at them all day," he continued. His tone was carefully neutral, but his eyes never left yours. And you found you couldnât look back, and not blush. He reached over, delicately pulling you into his sideâit was only then that you realized how closely he held you, and how the gentle incline of the hill brought you almost eye to eye with him.
One side of his mouth twitched. "Your cheeks are like cherries." he chortled, delighted.
You tucked your chin into the wool of his coat. "It's cold," you said, defensively. He shook his head. "I am not complaining. I think they're rather charming. They make you look like a winter nymph.â
âI find that really offensive.â you grumble in response, the forest nymph and fairy blood in you disliking the comparison all together. He laughs, warmly, and pulls you even closer. â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨
[ S e u n g m i n ] finds out youâre a [ W i t c h ]
His initial reaction: Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [ R e l u c t a n t ]
^ heâs highly reliable, itâs in his blood to keep up with commitments. People often completely rely on him to complete complicated tasks with efficiency and perfection as he is naturally very rational. Itâs that rational side of his mind that will force him to listen to your explanation to the end.
^ he would never, consciously, let you down; he consistently gives his best to meet your expectations. Heâs the first to answer your call and the last to leave a situation when youâre in need. This will be beneficial to you as he will be compelled to stop, listen and hear you out.
^ like Felix, he is extremely analytical. He will think everything throughâweighing the options, good and badâbefore making a decision about your relationship.
^ at first heâll be quite reluctant, hesitant and unwilling to budge in his prejudice. Itâs something he canât help, growing up believing witches are evil, dark, dangerous and manipulative. But deep down he knows you, and this will be all he needs to encourage understanding and acceptance.
^ heâs a problem solver. He likes to tackle problems of close ones and the people around him. At first it might seem like heâs trying to control the situation, but you will soon realize that he is only analyzing your situation to find ways of helping you improve your life.
^ he can be critical at times, overly demanding. Itâs because he already has a clear picture in his mind about how things should be done. But heâs also open to change, and once he comes to terms with your witchy ways, he will become the most supportive boyfriend you could ask for.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ âSo tell me about it,â he interjected, pulling you away from your inner dialogue.Â
âWhat?â you look up from your study table, eyes meeting his across the room.
âAre you a good witch or a bad witch? Do you practice Black Magic? Have you ever put me under a spell?â his face is blank, expressionless, but his voice gives away his anger and confusion.
âThere is no such thing as White Magic or Black Magic.â you turn you head away from him, unable to accept him being so cold and cruel to you. âIf you are participating in magic, you are interfering with the natural order of how life would have developed without your hand in it. You are manipulating reality to suit your own personal needs. Regardless of whether you perceive it as "positive" or "white light", you are manipulating life. And just like life, itâs not black and white, all good or all bad.â you trail off, your stomach in knots. Itâs best to be truthful, you know this, but it hurts you to think that something like this could damage you relationship. Or worse, end it. You feel the telltale signs of tears forming in your eyes, the heat almost unbearable.
âAnd no, Iâve neverâI would never use it on you.â there is a brief silence and despite him approaching you, stepping much closer, you resolutely keep your eyes lowered.Â
âCan you tell me about them?â his voice was much softer now, much too close. You look up into his eyes and realize heâs referring to the plants on your bed side table. You take a deep breath to steady yourself, slowly stand up from the chair and turn towards your bed.
âThese are tropical palms. They bring strong solar energy into your home that break up stale energy, and keep your home safe from nasty spiritual entities.â you trail off, carefully watching his expression. âThis right here is African violet, and itâs associated with love and magic. But I use it because itâs vibrant purple flowers pull lunar energy into your home. Lunar energy is most important to those in my coven.â you whisper, the vivid memory of your grandmother and aunt surrounding themselves, filling their homes, with African violets almost brings tears to your eyes. âAloe is associated with the water element because the gel inside the leaves. Theyâre cooling and healing.â you continue on, pulling yourself out of your reminiscing.Â
Finally you turn to the last plant, your moms personal favorite. âThe clusters of star shaped flowers that grow on the long tendrils of the hoya, also called a wax plant, produce truly intoxicating nectar whose aroma fills the whole house. It also bestows blessings on anyone who smells it.â You wait for him to say something, still avoiding his unnerving stare, unsure you want to even see his reaction.
âThis stuff? These plants? They really mean a lot to you, donât they?â his voice is barely there, a whisper, but his words still have the same affect. You blink, once, twice, and the tears you were so set on holding back, fall.
Suddenly heâs there, pulling you closer to him, guiding your head into the space between his neck and shoulder. His warm embrace is enough to comfort you by itself but he still whispers to you, âItâs okay, itâll be okay. Iâm not mad. I wonât leave you. Itâs okay.â And, for once, you truly believe it.
â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨
[ M i n h o ] finds out youâre a [ S h a p e s h i f t e r ]
His initial reaction: Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â [ E n t h r a l l e d ]
^ heâs focused and competitive. When he wants something he just goes for it. Also, when he sets his sight on something (you) he allows very few things to get in his way and does anything to achieve his goal (to be with you.) This focus, this competitive nature, will keep him present and attentive during your confession.Â
^ heâs also extremely brave and daring. He isnât afraid of challenges in life, so what appears to be a crazy risk to more conservative people is just a normal day for the brave-hearted Minho. Because of this, he wonât be afraid. When you tell him, show him, what you really areâheâll be more enthralled than fearful or confused.
^ one of the great things about Minho is his loyalty to you. He values trust and honesty making him a fiercely loyal boyfriend, and he expects you to be the same way. That being said, he most likely will be upset that you felt the need to keep such a secret. But he will quickly get over it, dismiss those feelings, once he realizes just how honest youâre being with him in the present. ^ he respects you and treats you with amazing loyalty, generosity and kindness. Him finding out youâre a shapeshifter definitely will not change that.
^ however, it most likely will take him a hot second to be content within your relationship dynamic again, as a part of him perceived your lack of truthfulness as disloyalty. There's a pretty good chance that your actions will cause some big-time resentment to him, at least for a while.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ âItâs okay, I mean if you want to, if you need toââ he trails off, his eyes sympathetic. âIâm okay with it.âÂ
You look at him ready to cry again. Not out of pain. Not out of need. But because his words rub that part of your soul that suffers, that wants to be explored like a virgin land that has remained intact for centuries and craves to be occupied, appreciated and transformed. So you let yourself go.
You groan as your limbs lessen into shorter proportions and your neck stretches. Auburn-coloured fur emerged upon your fevered skin, and the sounds of your bones cracking, shifting in an echo around the cold mountain side. Your snout elongates and your teeth sharpen.
You were panting and, with one last shudder, your body slides from human to fox in a crack. Minho stood there, face drawn up in a twisted expression full of empathetic pain, watching the frost dissipate on your hot tongue, sending tiny rivulets of steam into the air. In this form, the world was sharp and clear, he was sharp and clear. You never realized how many different colors of shadow there were, how the angles of his face cast such an array of shade. It made you savor the dark beauty of the cold evening even more.
Minutes passed byâhim staring at you, and you staring at himâboth of you almost caught in a trance. When a little blue butterfly fluttered up to you, and landed on your snout. You blinked at it and it fluttered to your ear; it was winter, cold and lifeless on the mountain side, why were there suddenly butterflies? A big yellow butterfly gently floats over and lands on your paw, and as if reading your mind, Minho cocks his head to the right, âWell, thatâs different.âÂ
Soon a whole swarm of them float up and down around you, like a swirl of multicolored petals. It happened once before, in your backyard, when you shifted on a late afternoon.
Your magic must be strong enough, in that moment, to attract themâdespite the weather and location. Butterflies were small and light, and very magic sensitive. For some reason you made them feel safe and they gravitated to you like iron shavings to a magnet. Minho let out a quiet giggle as a bigger butterfly landed on your forehead and you shook it off, affronted. Resisting the urge to fight the assault, you took a step back. They ruined your ferocious badass image, but youâd have to be a complete beast to swat butterflies.
Now if a baby deer frolicked out from between the mountains and tried to cuddle up, you would yip. You wouldnât bite it, but you would most definitely yip, maybe even growl. You had your limits. Minho slowly approached you and reached out, his fingers hesitant. You tilted your head down, letting him touch your ears. His hand trembled slightly as he caressed the fluffy protrusion. You knew they were warmer than he thought theyâd be, a living extension of the human inside. He petted your pelt next, charmed by the coarse fur and the feel of your muscles bunching and moving underneath. Finishing off with your tale, he ran his fingers through it, slowly, thoroughly.
Sitting back, he winked down at you. "You probably get this a lot, butâŚI like your backside.â he laughed at your annoyed yip. âWhat? Itâs so fluffy.â You stretch back into human form, the change much easier in reverse, and look up at him from the ground. âAlways gotta be the smartass, donât you?â you roll your eyes, with a smile.
â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨â¨
To the beautiful anon who requested a supernatural s/o reaction [Stray Kids,] I hope you like it!!! đ
đ
It was superrrr fun to do, so thank you for the request, loveee! đĽ°
#the layout seems a bit off to me đ¤#I guess this is my ipads way of rebelling#hahaha đ#stray kids#stray kids reaction#reactions#moodboards#supernatural#lee minho#lee felix#bang chan#seo changbin#hwang hyunjin#han jisung#kim seungmin#yang jeongin#Iâm soooo nervous rn lmfao đ
#I have no set way of doing these#and this ones a bit different than the others đđ#I hope itâs sufficient lol đ
#â¤ď¸â¤ď¸â¤ď¸
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Not a Hero
Wade Wilson x Stark!Reader
Requested by @ritiizzxxx
Heyy.. ik u did my request Last time n was amazing so I thought can u do another one please... Where Stark!reader will Wade Willson as she was just curious about his power and Tony doesn't like it. But she ended up recruiting him as an Avenger.
Warnings:Swearing (more than usual), violence (more violent than usual), dark & inappropriate humor, sexual innuendos, death, mentions of cheating, cheesy nicknames, maybe ooc characters?, breaking the forth wall.
A/N: Iâm really happy that you liked the last one, and i really hope you like this one too. GIFs are not mine.
âDoes anybody want to explain why Wade Wilson is in the waiting room?â, your dad demands as he walked into your office.Â
Ever since Pepper had handed the position to you, your dad had made a habit of visiting you when he could. It was nice that you were able to see him a lot, but sometimes (like right now) you wish that he could have other stuff going on.Â
Your dad had never been a fan of yourâs and Wadeâs friendship. You dad often argued that Wade was dangerous and being a known friend of him was probably more dangerous. Although he was right, you still liked being friends with Wade.
âHe has an appointment,â you say.Â
âFor what?â In all honesty, you didnât know what the appointment was about either, but if he made an appointment then it had to be for some purpose, right?
âI donât know, Dad,â you tell him as you stand up from your desk. âHis appointment is going to start soon, so Iâm gonna call him in now.â
âOkay.â Your dad hugs you goodbye before making his way towards the glass door. âIâll see you at home.â You donât miss the strange look he gives Wade, who is currently sitting comfortably in the waiting room, dressed in his Deadpool outfit, and hogging most of the magazines.
âThen, she told me that if I didnât get out, sheâd turn me into a fucking knife rack,â Wade tells you twenty minutes into his appointment. You knew that if this were anyone else, youâd have kicked them out by now, but you couldnât with him.
âIâm sorry,â you say genuinely. âThat mustâve been hard for you.â
âThree years thrown out the fucking window and for what?â Wade tells you, pausing for dramatic effect. âThat dude who plays James Gordon on TV.â
âI meant her threatening to stab you, but Vanessa cheating on you mustâve also been hard.â Youâve never been cheated on, so you canât imagine how hurt Wade must be feeling now.Â
âOh. Itâs okay. I canât die,â he casually says to you.
âPardon?â
âAfter Francis experimented on me, I became pretty much immune to everything, including death.â
âWow. Thatâs amazing,â you say. âWhat other powers do you have?â
You just realized how weird it was that youâve known Wade for a few years now and not once had you bothered to ask what his superpower was.
âBreaking the forth wall.â
âWha- Never mind.â You didnât really know what he meant by that, although you werenât going to question it. Youâd already gotten used to him talking to people who werenât there, so this was probably something that had to do with that.âMaybe- have you ever thought of joining the Avengers?â
âNo, not really,â he shrugged.
âYou could,â you say. âWe could-â
The truth was, you mostly wanted Wade to join the Avengers because he was your best friend. You knew he was an expert at fighting, so that was a plus, but you really enjoyed talking and spending time with him. If you didnât know any better, youâd think you were in lo-
âSorry, buttercup, but Iâm no hero,âhe says, sitting up. âAnyway, do you want to get lunch?â
âSure,â you say. You didnât want to drop the subject, but you had to admit that you were starving.Â
âYou asked him to join the Avengers?â You dad asks incredulously.Â
After lunch, you and Wade went your separate ways. You dad was waiting for you back at the compound, and was very displeased at you for taking it upon yourself for asking Wade to join your little band of heroes.
âYeah. He told me that he can heal really fast and he was even able to take down the guy who experimented on him,â you explain to him.âBesides, heâs my best friend.â
âY/N, he calls himself Deadpool,â you dad argues. âI donât want you hanging out with someone like him.â
âWell, Iâm an adult, so-â you say, but your dad interrupts you.
âI know. Iâm not telling you what to do,â he explains. You were a grown adult, capable of making your own decisions (most of the time), and you knew that he knew that.âIâm just offering some fatherly advice.â
âI understand, but I still think heâd make a great addition to the team.â
âLetâs just agree to disagree.â You dad stands up from his seat, probably ready to go to bed, before he asks, âBesides, if the X-Men canât recruit him, what make you think heâll join us? How long have you been friends with him anyway?â
âI think Iâve know him for around two years.â You met him before that Francis guy had experimented on him. You were sure that if he hadnât already been in a relationship with Vanessa at the time, then maybe- nope. You were getting way ahead of yourself.
âOkay, what do you see?â You dad asks through your ear-piece. You were currently infiltrating an old warehouse that was being used by someone who is suspected of having close ties with Hydra.Â
âI see a bunch of boxes and an old computer,â you say. The place was a mess. Papers and trash was littered everywhere, the boxes were badly sealed, and the computer looked like the one Mathew Broderick had in WarGames.
âOkay. Can you turn on the computer?â You dad asks. You certainly could, if you could get through the mess without tripping and landing on your face.
âYeah, let me just-â Suddenly you felt something collide with the side of your head. Youâre vision started to become blurry and the last thing you heard before passing out was the sound of your dad calling your name.
âWhat the hell?â You ask as soon as you open your eyes. You were in some kind of room and you couldnât move your hands. They were tied up buy some rusty, yet strong, chains.
âMs. Starkâ, Some guy said. You donât recognize him, but he knows who you are. âWe were beginning to think that Aries had hit you a little too hard. Itâs nice to see you finally awake.â
You roll your eyes at him. Youâve heard the same speech one too many times in your life to feel threatened by whoever this Aries guy is.
âCan you just cut to the chase already?â you ask.Â
âWe want information on the Avengers.â You refrain from laughing. The whole kidnapping and torturing for information thing seemed pretty cliche, even for Hydra.
âYouâre gonna have to try a lot harder than kidnapping me to tell you anything... which I wonât.â
The man becomes serious before turning to another man, who you assumed was Aries. He was pretty huge. He was bulky, tall, and seemed to have a permanent scowl on his face.
âAries,â he says. Aries immediately yanks your hair back painfully. You donât let your pain show as the man continues to ask questions about the Avengers.
After a few days, you barely felt pain anymore. Theyâd cut you, punch you, kick you, and even pour freezing cold water on you.Â
âOkay,â you finally said, âThis is starting to get a bit redundant.â
The man, whose name you learned was Heath, looked at you angrily. Not only had he failed to get any sort of information from you, but you continuously teased him the entire time he and Aries tortured you.
âThen I guess we have no use for you,â he stands up, getting ready to end you, before you both hear a knock on the door.Â
âWho the fuck-â Heath, with his gun ready, opens the door but he is met with Ariesâs head flying at him.
âLanguage.âWade says as he shoots Heath a few times. Finally, he looks at you.âHey, hot stuff, you okay?â
âYeah,â you say. Youâre glad that he showed up when he did. Well, preferable, he couldâve shown up earlier, but this works too. âCan you get me out of these chains,â you saw motioning to the rusted chains that were constricting your hands.
âAs much as I wanna see you tied up, seeing you bruised and bloody is not my idea of a good time,â he says. You roll your eyes as he works on getting you free.
âThanks.â
âNo problem, sweet cheeks,â he says.
Back at the compound, you dad was pretty much having a fit. Apparently, all of the Avengers had been out looking for you. Somehow, although nobody knows how, Wade had been the one to find out where you were.
âLook, I know that you said that being a hero wasnât your thing, but maybe you could reconsider,â you say. âAfter all, my dad is probably never going to send me on a solo mission again, so I kinda need a partner.â
âIâll consider it.â You know deep down what you won.Â
Wade looked at you in a way that heâd never looked at you before. Youâre mind immediately went back to all the stuff he told you about Vanessa. Hadnât they just recently broke up?Â
âI think this is the part of the fan-fiction where weâre supposed to kiss,â he says.Â
âWhat?â Did he really just say âfan-fictionâ?
He kissed you, and neither of you noticed your dad approaching.
âIâm gonna need another drink.â
A/N: I know this is a bit late, but I honestly wasnât sure how I wanted to write this. I still hope you like it, though.
#deadpool#deadpool x stark!reader#deadpool x reader#deadpool x avenger!reader#tony stark x daughter!reader#tony stark x daughter reader#wade wilson#wade wilson x stark!reader#wade wilson x avenger!reader#wade wilson x reader
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Dream In Color (Part Three): Surprise!
Summary: It's been almost an entire week without any activity from Y/N. Though Daniel and Y/N keep in touch when they can, it's not enough to permanently raise her spirits.. Luckily, her mother and brother have the perfect solution.
Word Count: 1136
Warnings: s a d n e s s
Pairing: none yet, future Jonah Marais x Y/N
A/N: Ooh, she long, sis! I thought about splitting this one up into two parts, but decided not to. Hopefully you don't mind it being longer than the others.
In case there's any confusion in the timeline: this series spans the time from the release of 8 Letters in 2018, all the way to the recent January 15th release of The Good Times and The Bad Ones. Happy reading!
-Auri đ
âââ
Wednesday, September 5, 2018
On Wednesday morning, Y/N wasn't feeling any better. She and Daniel kept in touch throughout the week, texting and calling when time allowed, but she missed him more and more. As time went on, she couldn't listen to the album without wanting to cry.
She was on the phone with her mom that morning, trying to explain what was wrong but even she didn't fully understand.
"I don't know what's wrong with me, Mom. I just don't feel like doing anything anymore. Yesterday, I didn't even go into the dark room." Y/N picked at the fuzzy blanket across her lap as she waited for her mother's voice to fill the silence.
"Sweetheart, I think I know what this is about," Keri replied calmly. "The last year has been a whirlwind for both you and your brother. I know being apart hasn't been easy on either of you."
Y/N sighed and thought back over the last time she'd seen Daniel. It was two autumns prior; the time had come and gone so quickly with him flying out to Los Angeles at the request of Jack Avery, his future bandmate. If she'd known then that it would be the last time she saw her favorite person, she'd have captured more memories.
"Iâ" she faltered. She swallowed, forced herself to hold back the tears. "I'm so proud of him, Mom."
She could hear her mother's gentle smile through the phone. "I know you are, honey. And he does, too. Y/N/N, it's okay to miss him. Two years is a long time to go without seeing someone, especially your twin brother. It's okay to feel lonely and uncertain."
"But I don't want to feel this way, Mom! I don't want to feel lonely. I don't want to miss him. I don't want to feel like I'm losing my best friend!"
"Oh, sweetheart⌠Listen to me, just because you feel this way doesn't mean you aren't proud of him. Anyone with eyes can see that you are your brother's biggest fan. You aren't losing him, Y/N, your paths just aren't as connected as they used to be. And that's okay."
"It just hurts, Mama. It hurts so much."
"I know it does, sweetheart," Keri paused a moment. "Hey, Daniel's calling me back. Get some rest, I'll call you again in a little bit. I love you so much, my sweet girl. It'll be okay, I promise."
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Sunday, September 9, 2018
Four days after her conversation with her mother, Y/N was slowly regaining her sense of self back. She'd kept her mother's encouragement close, reminding herself often that though they were forging their own paths, she and Daniel would still have each other's backs. She missed him more than she knew how to say, but the cloud of loneliness was beginning to lift.
She'd just gotten out of the shower when her phone went off with a text from her brother.
Buggy đ: Hey, if you're not busy, call me
She paused in the middle of her bedroom, towel wrapped around her body, and hair dripping wet. She typed a quick reply and headed for her closet.
I just got out of the shower. What's up?
Buggy đ: Just call me when u can, okay?
Why are u being so cryptic? I hate that đ
Buggy đ: Do you, though? Do you really?
Y/N could almost hear the snort of laughter as if he were right in front of her. She forgot about getting dressed and sat down on the end of her bed. Any chance she got to talk to Daniel made her day ten times better. She decided getting dressed could wait, but she wouldn't give him what he wanted just yet.
Oh, my god. Daniel, just tell me what u want!
Buggy đ: What, a guy can't call his favorite twin sister just because?
First of all, I'm ur ONLY twin sister. There's two of us, that's literally the meaning of twins. TWO
And no, u can't. Because it's never JUST calling with u
Buggy đ: Ouch, Y/N/N. You wound me
It was Y/N's turn to laugh at her brother's reaction. She waited a few minutes before texting back.
Oh, do I? Do I wound u, Dani?
Buggy đ: Will you quit being such a brat and call me already?
No, because u won't tell me what u want
And I'm getting dressed, so
Buggy đ: Well, if you would CALL ME
Why can't u call me, hmm? đ¤
Buggy đ: Because I need you to call me
She thought on his response for a moment. The thing about the Seavey twins was that they were terrible at hiding things from each other. However, Daniel was doing a great job of not only keeping his secret airtight, but also annoying the shit out of his sister. Y/N considered calling, then decided against it. She wanted to see if she could either get him to spill or annoy him into calling her instead.
But why? And why now?
Buggy đ: I just do. Are you gonna call me or not?
And she had him! She could tell he was losing his patience and it excited her.
Nope. U call me or no deal
Buggy đ: Oh, my god. Fine. You're so annoying
Yes, but u loooooove me â¤ď¸
Buggy đ: Yeah, whatever đ
The twins talked for five hours.
Daniel's surprise for Y/N was a trip to see him and the boys in two weeks time. She was ecstatic! It had been their mother's idea, a gift to her babies to help ease the stress and bring them both some much needed comfort.
Nothing could wipe the smile from her face, knowing she would see her favorite person soon. She decided to check her social media. Going the whole week without updating was unusual for Y/N and she knew people would notice her absence.
After posting on Instagram about being able to see Daniel soon, she checked her Twitter. Sure enough, fans of hers and the band's certainly had taken note of her inactivity. One fan in particular had even sent her a message.
She giggled at the screen name: @danielseaveyswifey. At least he was getting some recognition.
Y/N talked with the fan for a little while, feeling even better that someone who knew who she was simply because of her brother, had taken the time out of their day to check up on her. She knew Daniel would appreciate it just as much as she did.
Before going to bed that night, she made sure her schedule remained clear from September 23rd until she knew when she would be back from LA. Life for Y/N Seavey was looking up!
âââ
Surprise social media post â HERE & HERE
#why dont we imagines#why dont we social media imagines#corbyn besson imagines#daniel seavey imagines#jonah marais imagines#zach herron imagines#jack avery imagines#dream in color
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vanilla sunday .
no one asked, i just heckinâ felt like it mâdude. under readmore for length. iâll try to keep my answers relatively to-the-point, too, since thisâll be a longer post but feel free to inquire on things or ... whatever u-u/ aye. i go sleep now.
is your muse a romantic? do they dream of love and marriage?
short answer: no.
as a teenager, dol didnât have much interest in pursuing a romantic relationship with any of his peers around yuflam--or at all, really. by the time he got to academy things were either too busy or starting to get too tense for him to consider the idea. and shortly after that he went over a decade thinking heâd never even see sunlight again.
at this point, he just... --itâs just another thing he might want but doesnât recognize it as something he wants. because heâs earnestly so bad at listening to his own desires and is more than willing to cast them aside if it means aiding someone he cares about achieve their own.
is your muse a deviant? are they overly flirtatious or forward?
no. thereâs no real expansion on this, just no. <xD he tends to be much more bashful and sheepish, partially because of aforementioned inability to recognize he might want a relationship with someone. and even if he DOES realize this, heâs... extremely self aware. weâll leave it at that.
is your muse good at kissing? are they experienced?
NOPE. and no. heâs never kissed anyone.
does your muse initiate a lot of physical contact?
nooooo no no no. he has an anxiety disorder (haphephobia) revolving around physical contact and even something as âsmallâ as shaking hands or a shoulder bump can make him very nervous, uncomfortable and alert. the reaction is almost doubled if it comes with the sensation or energy of being grabbed.
itâs going to take a lot of time, patience, and trust for him to be comfortable initiating physical contact with you.
is your muse comfortable with public displays of affection?
no, for both the above reason as well as the paranoia that comes with being a fugitive/legally dead. the less attention thatâs drawn to him, the better. at most, heâd hold your hand... but refer to the previous question for that.
does your muse steal clothing from their partner?
less âstealâ and more borrow. due to having limited resources after escaping the labs and very few belongings he can truly call his own, dol wouldnât/doesnât just take or use things that belong to friends, family or potential partners (part of this spurs from his OWN resource guarding). heâd be more likely to approach you while you were brushing your teeth and be like âhey, sâit cool if i wear your hoodie todayâ and then respond based on that answer.
and heâs going to ask you every time. he doesnât assume.
is your muse the big spoon or the little spoon?
varies! but most likely, when theyâre facing each other, he little-spoons because pressing his face into the curve of the neck just above the collar is not only secure and comforting somehow, but he can hear your heartbeat.
when one of them is facing away, he tends to big spoon. --and obviously this is all assuming heâs at that level of comfort when it comes to physical touch + the partner.
is your muse comfortable with, or proud of their body? are they insecure?
complicated?
heâs very comfortable and proud of his body when it comes to his physical build, strength, fitness, etc. his strength and speed is something he values and keeping himself healthy and capable is very important to him. he knows heâs done a good job (those arms donât lie) and he takes pride in that.
~however~, being a chimera... --heâs optimistic, yes. heâs just happy to be alive, of course. itâs not so bad. ...but he is fully, deeply, and painfully aware of how someone might react to witnessing some of his âquirksâ when it comes to his splice or the idea of being with someone who isnât entirely human. and the fact that he often became a target of light jabbing and jokes with the nesties, because dog behavior is much more well-known and commonly familiar than croc or snake or bull behavior, has only added to this awareness.
then, of course, thereâs the added detail that heâs not even a perfected chimera. heâs just a successful one. a C- on some government biology test; barely passing.
so yeah. thereâs some surface level pride, but... a lot of shame underneath.
is your muse attracted to any features in particular?
physical? no.
he has a soft spot and respect for people who refuse to give into their pain, though. where he experienced trauma and fear and let it make him hardened in a lot of ways, there are other people who have only become brighter, warmer, and do whatever they can to keep someone else from experiencing what they have.
to say he admires that trait in a person is an understatement.
have their crushes been mostly male, mostly female, or evenly split?
heâs only really had two, and theyâve both been gals, so i guess that makes it mostly female. iâve mentioned before that he might have been uselessly in love with martel in the time before the raid (whether she felt the same is unknown) and he in default verse is lowkey sweet on rose.
have their partners been mostly male, mostly female, or evenly split?
he hasnât had a partner.
is your muse easily flustered? do they blush, swear, etc.?
yes, yes, yes. him being flustered is usually a combo-result of: (1) not being used to that kind of attention from someone he actually likes, (2) having no idea how to respond, (3) internalized shame over what he is, and (4) heâs a fucking idiot.
where is your muse most sensitive?
his head, mostly, especially on his hair line and around the ears.
and i can 10000% promise to you that if he ever lets you comb your fingers in his hair or rub around his temples and you make some kind of dog-related-comment, youâre actually going to cause a shit-ton of psychic damage iâm gonna need you to roll like 10d6 for me.
please, please please please donât ever refer to him as--or make jokes connecting him to--a dog in moments that are supposed to be vulnerable and/or intimate, i canât... express this enough, it will hurt him.
is your muse more submissive or dominant in a relationship?
idk, i guess submissive but again: idk
would your muse ever tempt their partner, e.g. flirting, wearing tight/sexy clothing?
nah. not really his thing.
if he does âtemptâ them itâs going to be sincerely accidental. like... yeah you walked in on me doing pull-ups i guess. would you hand me my water bottle? iâm parched.
does your muse initiate heated/sexual contact, or do they wait for their partner?
i feel like this question deserves itâs own post because i have a LOT of thoughts regarding rosecetto, specifically, on this topic.
outside of that ship, however, the answer is likely no. heâs not the initiator primarily for touch-anxiety reasons and also chimera-related-shame reasons, even if the partner has assured him thereâs nothing wrong with him in the past.
does your muse leave hickies? do they ask for them?
eeehhhhh???? ... i guess accidentally sometimes?? and no.
does your muse like to be pinned down, or to pin their partner?
thatâs a big NO. if you pin him down, even if heâs reached a point of security with you that he allows you to touch him, youâre going to flare up any of that anxiety that had previously subsided. heâs been physically restrained and held down far too long and all for bad/painful reasons, and he canât associate it with anything other than âtheyâre going to hurt me and i need to get away, no matter what i have to doâ.
as for pinning his partner, itâs likely also a no because heâd just... be too aware of his own trauma to even try doing it and heâd probably be uncomfortable being asked to do it.
has your muse reached first/second/third base? home run?
honey, heâs done nothing, he hasnât even swung--
would your muse be interested in engaging with multiple partners?
no. he doesnât see anything wrong with it when it comes to other people but this is definitely not for him or something he could be comfortable with.
would your muse ever send a sexual text message? would they send pictures?
n/a, but even in modern verses the answer would be no
does your muse read smut, own magazines, or watch p-rn?
nah
is your muse the type to discuss their sex life or sexual prowess with others?
abso. fucking lutely. not. no no no.
at absolute. MOST? he might open up to sakura (yinseal) about it. maybe greed (avadite). and itâd only be if he felt like he was doing something wrong or felt overwhelmed and self-conscious. but otherwise this is his and his partnerâs business.
is your muse a top, a bottom, or a switch? do they have a lean?
defaults to bottom but will top if asked or in some circumstances.
crystal has confirmed that rose (forsakenflora) tops, so jfdlfjklsjkldhsd
how interested is your muse in sex and sexual activity?
heâs not.
itâs not a priority of his, and he definitely doesnât want to hear about yours.
do they have sex frequently, occasionally, or rarely?
not at all right now jf kljdklhshf lhfklsdg
#â : prompted headcanons .#////nsfw /// / /#////suggestive // // ///#[ and with that i bid you goodnight ]
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hello!!! iâm chey and before i introduce you all to my boy yijae, i would first like to let it be known that the only form of animal crossing i have ever played is pocket camp </3 but i watch the hell out of island tours on yt so i was so excited to see this rp in the tags! you can find yijaeâs profile here and his plots here and.... a mess under the cut but iâll call it an intro
first of all:Â no, his name is not actually yijae. itâs a play on his name because another romanization of the surname lee is yi, so itâs his surname + the second syllable of his given name. might refer to him as this in threads, might not, but itâs his main nickname that his friends prob use with him! he likes it a lot.
the youngest of three. was really young when he lost his parents, doesnât have any solid memories of them so he kind of views his siblings as half-siblings, half-parents.
endured a lot of people telling him that he was lucky to have siblings to look after him and needed to behave well, show appreciation, not give them a hard time. most people who said that meant well, but it bothered him a lot bc thatâs like telling a kid they canât get upset Ever because theyâre lucky someone is raising them.
anyway it resulted in him being an ass-kisser as a kid, didnât want to give anyone (esp his siblings) a reason to view him as a nuisance / pest
developed really, really good people skills bc he was constantly looking for ways to make himself useful / valuable in some way, felt like he had to prove his worth. genuinely very social, likes people a lot so itâs whatever, really. he probably wouldâve ended up developing good people skills regardless
he does have a rly bad temper tho...... beware
also has anxiety and a lot of his symptoms are the lesser understood ones (w/ the main one being irritability/anger), so mix that with his naturally short temper and he do b causing scenes and hurting feelings sometimes
literally always seen carrying some kind of bottle w/ water in it because once he starts getting overwhelmed, he starts getting Hot and itâs just.... handy to have water at his disposal whenever he needs it yk
most of the time, heâs pretty well-put together and very very smiley!!! considered the face of able siblingsâ clothing shop bc he greets each and every customer with a smile. always available to answer questions, give recommendations, relay messages to his siblings or just chat! not really all that skilled when it comes to sewing or any other skills directly related to clothes (which is partially why customer service is his main duty) but if uâre in a rush, heâll try really hard
pretty much the only thing that can make him lose his cool w/ customers is if you come in and start talkin shit about any of the items
values the store a lot, but also kind of feels like he carries more than his fair share of the weight. definitely not true LMAO but that belief makes him get annoyed w/ his siblings sometimes
if you ever come into the store at the wrong moment and find him throwing a fit / fighting with his sibling, no you didnât <3
keeps a sketchbook full of clothing ideas. ofc heâll never make any of âem because heâs not quite that crafty, but he shares them with his siblings / with other store employees to see if theyâre up to the challenge. collects lots of different fashion magazines to keep up with trends or just to look at bc he thinks fashionâs neat
if heâs not @ the store, heâs probably riding his bike around either one of the islands. enjoys bike rides a ton, likes to feel the wind in his hair and nonchalantly see whatâs going on outside of the shop (aka heâs nosy)
fun, but also kind of flaky??? like heâs the guy who will Definitely go to that party with you on short notice but will also call out of plans you made with him 6 months ago
sometimes he goes mia for a couple days, always has some really dumb explanation like âi was hunting for crabs and i lost track of timeâ or âi was attending a 4-day clown seminarâ or âi was camping with my boy, bigfootâ but really heâs just been laying in his bed and trying to re-energize. it b that way sometimes
speaking of crabs... he likes them a lot! thinks theyâre groovy lilâ things. ticket into his heart? crab-hunting with him!!!! he doesnât disturb them too much, he just likes to dig them out of the sand and look at them for a minute, then let them go. he thinks theyâre super funny-looking so sometimes he just... laughs his ass off as they scuttle away. some people who have witnessed this have nicknamed him The Crab Bully, but he doesnât have any bad intentions. itâs just entertaining for him
wears glasses most of the time bc his sight is terrible. could wear contacts, yeah, but he has chronically dry eyes and artificial tears only go So Far! aka itâs more comfy to wear glasses even if they make his face look even rounder than it already is
has a slight lisp. very very slight. mainly when he has to pronounce s/th or l/r... skz stans you know what iâm talking about
fucks with his hair a lot. kind of a comfort thing, kind of a fashion thing. itâs dark blue atm, but it changes pretty frequently. he does it himself, too, so you already know his hair is fried to HELLLLLL
really social, but also might ghost you for three weeks and then resume the convo as if he never left. knows he looks like the pleading emoji (god knows heâs been told enough times) so he uses his cuteness to his advantage when he knows heâs been actin like a dirtbag. also might send funny animal vids to ease his way back into ur life
when i say heâs really social, i mean heâs really social. will talk to anyone and everyone. make eye contact with him for half a second On Accident and oh, no, here he goes. very interested in other people, wants to know everything youâre willing to share. depending on the person, this can either be really comforting or really overwhelming. u think u want him to shut up but then he shuts up and itâs like damn..... why isnât yijae talking. thatâs weird
idk... i feel like iâm leaving out some really important info but this is all iâve got for now. feel free to ask me if thereâs anything else you wanna know about him!
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Cupidâs Blind Eye | Of Eternity and Euphoria (3)
Pairing: Park Jimin x Reader
Summary: A demigod looking for love meets the god of love himself.Â
Warnings: N/A. This might be the fluffiest one so far. wait I lied itâs not fluffy at all. Itâs really angsty. Iâm sorry.Â
Word Count: 5.4k wordsÂ
A/N: I have a lot of ideas for this series. So much so, Iâm ignoring my other series. Like Hamartia and The Pact which I was s u p p o s e d to start by now. Smh this is what happens when I have too many ideas. Iâm planning a spin off series for a Male!reader for this...I also wanted to tie this more into the overarching plot, but itâs okay, Iâll get you more park jimin okay. Consider me your supplier.
AS:ASJFLKWJQ:W it deleted my first draft >:(Â
Other:
Series Masterlist
Normal Masterlist
Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind; and therefore is winged cupid painted blind - William Shakespeare
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Your knees hurt already. It had been all of 15 minutes, but the gravel under your legs wasnât exactly comfortable. You had spent the last hour praying for the god of love to show himself and you fell to your knees desperately in the last 15.Â
âOh, god of love.â You drawled sarcastically, ready to leave the dilapidated altar. âAnswer my prayers.â You practically rolled your eyes, sick of this nonsense.Â
You stood slowly, realizing he probably wasnât going to show himself any time soon. You swiped the gravel off your knees, not noticing the presence behind you.Â
âYou should know not to be so disrespectful to your gods, darling.â A sly voice called. You froze. No way. When you turned to look, a man leaned against the pillars of the altar. He radiated lust and love, an inhuman aura. There was no doubt this was the god of love, lust, and passion.Â
And unlike him, you radiated a sort of pure aura; compared to him, of course. It drove him mad.Â
âOh.â You were at a loss for words. His build was literally of the gods and his face, oh his face. You couldnât find a single flaw in his face. From his adorable nose to his plump lips. You found yourself staring at his features for way longer than necessary. He smirked. This was a typical response to his appearance.Â
âWhy do you seek me out?â He stepped forward, peering into your eyes.Â
âI want to know my soulmate.â You clenched your fists. Everyone you knew already found theirs. Your friend, Jennie, had explained that the god of love had helped her, but you didnât believe her. You thought she was pulling your leg. The god quirked his head to the side.Â
âWhy do you need to know that?âÂ
âBecause Iâm sick of being alone.â You admitted, mouth feeling awfully dry as you nervously shifted from foot to foot.Â
His gaze softened, heart thumping.Â
âYou wonât be alone forever.âÂ
âIt feels like it sometimes.â
âYouâre a demigod.â It suddenly clicked. Your blatant disrespect of the gods, the odd aura surrounding you. Almost godly, but not quite. Not many demigods had a good connection to the gods. They were often cast aside, looked over, thought of as wannabes when many just wanted to live their lives. His altar wasnât any different than the other crumbled ones around, the only indicator was the Greek letters above, but only a demigod would be able to read that.Â
âAnd youâre a god. Iâve come to learn that it doesnât matter who you are, we all die in the end.â You frowned, thinking of your godly parent, one that had faded a long time ago, sentenced to eternal darkness for the atrocity of giving birth to you. However, being a demigod came with its perks. As long as you stayed healthy, you had longer lifespans while staying youthful. You had stopped aging around 25, but now you were around 60. You would likely begin aging around 100 and then die around 200. You had lived a long life so far without finding love. At first you thought it was possible, but as the years went on, no one gave you that spark, that burning sensation, that claimed them as your soulmate.Â
âListen.â You sighed, âI just want to know if they exist. Iâve spent years searching and I thought fate was supposed to bring us together. Are they to be born in another timeline? Shall we never meet?âÂ
The god of love frowned at your lack of faith in him as a god. He stepped forward, close enough for you to make out his face in detail. He radiated love, lust, and passion. His eyes were intense, but you didnât find yourself scared. In fact, it was almost comforting. He was the definition of love.Â
âDo you have so little faith in me? Fate has brought you here.â He gently reached out and touched your shoulder. He just needed to check. It was silly to think that the god of love, could not seem to find his lover. There. That spark, that burn. It spread like a wildfire, consuming your everything. It felt like your atoms had rearranged, yearning to be completed by him.Â
You couldnât do anything except stare at him. There was no way you were fated to one of the gods whom you so dearly despised. The gods had abandoned you as a child. Was this some cruel punishment? He softened his expression, taking in your frustrated form. Scared, worried, and anxious were reactions he expected from his soulmate, but anger was not one.Â
âI donât have to be with you, you know?â You said bitterly. âI can choose to stay away. Not all soulmates stay together.âÂ
Your words clearly had an effect on him because he nodded and stepped away. His eyebrows knitted together in confusion and hurt flashed across his face.Â
âI wonât force you to join me, but please reach out if you change your mind. You know where to find me.â He gestured to the altar. He, out of everyone, knew that you could put two perfect people next to each other in a room, but you couldnât force them to love each other. Love was a tricky thing and Jimin knew it best. âJust ask for Jimin.âÂ
Then he was gone, the wind seemingly taking him away. You rushed forward, looking for that sneaky god, but you couldnât locate him. You had to admit you felt bad about reacting that way. He didnât expect this either. With a sigh, you called out to the stones. âIâm Y/N. Lovely to meet you, Jimin.âÂ
And of course he heard you. His eyes trailed your back as you ran back into your small town. It was one of the last towns who truly believed in the gods, thatâs why so many had altars up. A smile made his way onto his face. Now it was just wait and see.Â
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âOh come on. You are way too boring, Jimin.â The fiance (Iâm sorry I donât have accents on this computer >:( ) of Yoongi rolled her eyes.Â
â___, You must understand, love just doesnât work like that, You have to let it happen.âÂ
âI bet she wants you to chase after her.â ___ continued. âHere, invite her to the wedding. She can be your plus one!âÂ
âYouâre too kind. I fear she may be afraid of the underworld.â
âDidnât you say sheâs a demigod?â Yoongiâs fiance quirked her head to the side. She was a human before a goddess. She had no bias against demigods and Jimin felt she was the best to approach about his encounter.Â
âYes.âÂ
âThen I doubt sheâll even bat an eye at the underworld.â She viewed her nails, thanking the workers and standing from the salon. âYou came all the way to the human world just so you could whine about your love life to the goddess of the underworld. Seems right.âÂ
Jimin scoffed, crossing his arms defensively. He was at a loss for words, however, and he bit his lip. âI came to you because she seems more human than god and I wanted to know your experience.âÂ
âWell, Yoongi basically kidnapped me, but not really. I just knew I wanted to go with him. Then he and I hit it off from there. I fought with Taehyung, stirred up some shit, and now Iâm going to be the downfall of Olympus.âÂ
The other gods didnât like her joking about the downfall of Olympus, but Jimin could always laugh.Â
âAt least my nails will look good while it happens, yeah?âÂ
The love god laughed along with her and the two walked over to the park. The park, known as Plyosum Park, was a great hotspot of godly energy. It was the quickest and easiest way to get to Olympus.Â
âNow, I must be going.â She smiled, âBut, have you ever thought, Jimin, that sheâs no more human than she is god? Maybe she just wants to be treated as the person she is; a demigod. Thatâs why I donât think I can help you much. I wish you luck, however.â She sent a small wave to him before ghostly hands reached up and dragged her under.
 Jimin sighed. She had a point. Heâll just treat you like any person. He let his wings grow out as he prepared to travel back to Olympus. They were a feathery white with golden flakes scattered in between. Many called him cupid for this, but he preferred the name Eros.Â
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You opened the letter with caution. It had appeared on your desk when you arrived home and it definitely hadnât been there before. The handwriting looked familiar, though you couldnât place your finger on it.Â
Dear Y/N,Â
     I am writing to you today because the god and goddess of the underworld are getting married. They have requested I bring along someone and of course my first thoughts were of you. It would be lovely if you are able to join me, but itâs quite alright if you donât feel comfortable. Please consider my offer, but I will not hold it against you if you choose not to come.Â
                                           Best,
                                          Jimin
You had to chuckled at his formal phrasing, but you couldnât blame him. He wanted to give you space and you respected him for being so cautious to your boundaries. It wasnât expected of the god. After all, he was a god. He could have just kidnapped you on the spot. Maybe he just understands love doesnât work like that. That made more sense. You carefully wrote back.Â
My dearest Jimin,Â
        I would be honored to attend such a momentous occasion. Sadly, I seem to be at a lack of formal wear suitable for this kind of event, what do you suggest?
                                           Best,
                                           Y/N
Of course you had to shoot back with your own formal tone. You hoped he understood the sarcasm in it as you hiked to the only place you knew he visited. His altar was old, crumbling, very un-beautiful for the most beautiful god you knew. Then you remembered that you would be meeting many beautiful gods and goddesses in a short time.Â
You placed the far messier letter down at his altar and hurried back to the village. Jimin was waiting, hoping to catch you, but you were gone before he could even speak. He bent down and slowly picked up the letter. He hastily tore it open, smiling fondly at your words. It was a shame he didnât get to see you properly before you rushed off.Â
It was in your nature, as a demigod, to be skiddish around most things; though you seemed to have more of a fight in you than other demigods. The issue was that demigods didnât fit in anywhere. The gods despised them and regarded them as abominations, hybrids, wannabes. The humans werenât much better, fearing anything they considered other. Demigods would rarely be able to rest without being hunted by one group or another.Â
Jimin looked to the middle distance, thinking about what outfit would best suit you. He wanted you to fit in with the other gods and goddesses. While he was a great believer in âlove is loveâ other gods may try to bring you down simply because you were a demigod. It made him feel ill to think of what terrible things could come your way because of your motherâs mistake, not that you were a mistake. He mentally scolded himself. He was constantly on the fritz of checking himself and making sure he said the right things.Â
He shook his head, returning to his place in the clouds.Â
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When there was a knock at your door, you jumped in surprise. It was not often that the village people visited you. You lived a lonely existence, but you decided this was fine.Â
âFor: Y/N.â You read carefully, surveying the package on your doorstep. You glanced around, eyes flicking to the house next door and traveling down the empty road. Hurriedly, you grabbed the package and hauled it inside your house, slamming the door shut.Â
The box was more of a rectangle. It was long and flat and there was no return address. You had a feeling you knew who had delivered it. You walked to the kitchen and grabbed a pair of scissors. Then you approached the package, unsure of how to open it. If this was what you thought it was, you didnât want to damage it. You gnawed at your lip, brows furrowed in concentration as you painstakingly cut through the thin strips of tape. This is ridiculous, just rip it open. You couldnât bring yourself to do that, however. You didnât want to rip the contents. So you continued your work before the box flaps finally undid themselves.Â
Your breath caught in your throat as you looked at the dress. It was a light pink, an innocent color. You rushed to your room to try it on. Of course it fit perfectly. It had a tight bodice, hugging the upper half of your body in a flattering way. Then the rest of the material flowed from the bodice. Layers of tulle and silk fluttered to the ground. In the box also came a delicate silver crown, headband, thing. The silver was twisted into delicate branches that curved every which way, forming a sort of bramble. It looked so elegant and graceful. The accessories that came with the dress included silver earrings and bracelets. The most important was a necklace. It was an graceful, thin, silver chain, but at the bottom it was weighed down by a light pink gemstone. It seemed to glow, like a beating heart. You didnât expect anything less from the god of love. You were stunning.Â
You couldnât wait to wear it to the wedding in a few days. Jimin would surely be impressed. You found yourself blushing girlishly at the thought of impressing him. You wanted him to want you. To see his eyes light up when you entered a room. To kiss him. You gently placed your fingers on your lips, thinking of his plush ones on yours. You knew he would oblige you if you asked, but you had only met the once and the soulmate bond was inexplicably strong already. You were worried it would consume you if you let it. Would you still be standing if it did?Â
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Days go by and now you stand at his altar. Itâs desolate, looking lonelier than ever before. You shift nervously, having done your makeup to reflect the lightness you were sure he wanted to portray. You knew he was trying to get the other gods to like you and you were still wary of meeting them. However, you promised yourself that you would try, even if the other immortals didnât. You didnât want to pace, having already painstakingly made sure your dress wasnât muddied on the way up. Where is he?Â
You were beginning to worry. Little did you know, Jimin was freaking out. He was pacing and getting far too worked up for a god.Â
âHyung! What if-what if she gets scared and doesnât want to see me again?â He whined to the sky god. He strutted up and down the hallway that led to his altar. He knew you were there, he could feel it, he just couldnât bring himself to step through.Â
âJiminie, sheâs a demigod, sheâll be okay.â Jin squeezed his younger friendâs shoulder. Jimin had trusted Jin enough to tell him about you. He thought of telling Namjoon, longing for the elderâs advice more than anything, but there was something sneaky about that god that held him off.Â
âWhat if she doesnât like me?â
âWhy would she show up if she wasnât interested?â
Jimin ran a hand through his hair and Jin could tell he was about to complain more so he stepped in.Â
âHey, youâll be okay.â He said softly, pushing the god of love towards the door. Who knew that such a suave man was so...scared of love? âIf youâre worried about jumping off the deep end and drowning,â Jin had heard that falling for your soulmate often felt that way. âThen itâll be okay. Youâll learn how to breathe underwater.âÂ
The elder god then took the, now quiet, god by the shoulders and steered him down the hallway. The god of love took one heavy step after another. âGo, youâll be late otherwise and that wonât do any good to lighten the other godsâ positions on her.â Jin said, almost scolding. The younger god just kept his mouth shut, nodding way too easily to his friend.Â
âWait, Hyung-â
âGo.âÂ
Then he was shoved through the doorway.Â
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He stumbled straight into you, hands reflexively reaching out to stable you. You gasped in surprise, heat rising to your cheeks.Â
âJimin! I thought you werenât coming.â You said in a huff. The god stood there sheepishly, scratching his head.Â
âRight, Iâm so sorry, I was...â Honesty is the best in any relationship. â...I was nervous.âÂ
You tilted your head to the side. Usually it was the other way around with all the assholes youâd dated in the past. They were always entitled, never asking you about anything.Â
âOh, I see.â You said awkwardly. âWell, itâs getting late.â You drifted off. Then you noticed him staring at you. Your cheeks flushed pink again at his gaze. It was intense, searching, as it took in your outfit. You heard him let out a soft breath.Â
âYou look...ravishing.â He breathed, finally putting into words how he felt. But nothing could describe how you looked. You looked like a goddess. Perfection, beauty, grace, intelligence, all in one. He swallowed, trying to keep himself in check. He held out his hand, âWell?â
You hesitated, looking at his soft hands. Hands that had never worked a day in their lives. You cautiously place your hands in his and he pulled you close.Â
âLetâs go.â He murmured. How he managed to make two words sound so enticing was lost on you.Â
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âPleasure to meet you, Ms...?â The goddess in front of you purred, holding out her hand. She somehow made it seem condescending. You and Jimin had been glued to the hip since you arrived, but he had briefly left to get drinks, leaving you to fend for yourself. Every god and goddess in the room was intrigued by you. You just kept thinking back to how extravagant the ceremony had been, but you had been more taken with how gracious the bride was. She was so bright compared to the god of the underworld, but somehow they got along.Â
âY/N.â You smiled, your lips pressed together. You looked, and in someways were, like a goddess, but everyone knew there was something different. Your impostor syndrome was driving you mad.Â
âRight.â The feline-like goddess strolled away. You turned, trying to ignore the headache you had, only to bump into another god. He looked startled, jumping back quickly. He had an airy quality of innocence and bright light around him. He was handsome, devilishly so.Â
âOh! Iâm so sorry.â You exclaimed genuinely, looking at the god with confusion. He had this air of familiarity about him that you couldnât quite place.Â
âNo, no, it was my fault. I wasnât watching where I was going.â He said shyly. Then an arm wrapped around your waist, a drink being handed to you softly. The man before you got visibly more pale at the sight of the god holding you. He didnât seem scared, just sad, maybe even heartbroken. âOh, I see.â He nodded quietly, mood doing a whole 180.
Jimin grimaced as he watched the other man retreat. He felt his heart strings tug, but pushed the pained feeling away. You could sense the tension so you carefully unwrapped yourself, taking his hands.Â
âLetâs dance.â You said softly. You werenât sure what just happened, but it didnât feel like your place to pry. As you place your hands on his shoulders and he planted his firmly on your waist, he let out a sigh.Â
âI know youâre curious, you canât hide things from me.â He glanced around as you both blended into the crowd of other couples slow dancing. âThat was Agape.âÂ
You nodded slowly. Thatâs why you felt so familiar. Anyone who was close to Eros understood Agape well.Â
âIs that was he goes by?â You knew Agape to be the innocent love, the first love, and Eros to be a more sexual love, one filled with desire. You also knew that Jimin didnât go by Eros, he went by Jimin. People often got him mixed up with Agape, claiming him as cupid, but Agape usually handled first love scenarios.Â
âNo.â He said quietly, as if losing his will to speak. âHe... he goes by-â He suddenly cut himself off. âActually, he doesnât like it when people refer to him by his real name. Just know that I like you now. You donât need to worry about him.â
You frowned, eyebrows knitting together. âI never thought he would take you away from me? I was just interested.âÂ
âAh, yeah, thereâs been...tension.â He didnât give you any more explanation so you sought to change the topic.Â
âTell me about the other gods.âÂ
He seemed glad to change subjects. Instead, he told you about Seokjin, the friendly sky god who knew of your predicament. Then he went on about his Taehyungie, Kookie, and then his hyungs. You smiled warmly at all his fond remarks, discussing them as if they were his blood relatives. It humanized them, though you werenât sure if that was intentional on his part. You had just warmed up to the idea of meeting these gods when someone screamed.Â
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It wasnât a happy scream. It was a blood curdling, ear piercing, shriek. A goddess ran from the entryway, clearly alarmed. You jumped and Jiminâs hold on you tightened.Â
You could see Taehyung pull his lover closer and Yoongi pushed his wife behind him. Other gods were taking defensive stances, eyeing the goddess warily. She was obviously a low level god, her aura faint and you were sure she was to die out soon. Seokjin carefully approached her like a wounded animal. Being the oldest, he had this responsibility; to meet all threats to his circle with full force.Â
âAh, Ms. Lee, what troubles you today?âÂ
The entire room stilled, watching Ms. Lee carefully. Seokjin spoke calmly, but there was a fierceness to his voice, a demanding power.Â
âWeâre under attack up above. Theyâll be here any minute!â She was inconsolable. You gripped Jiminâs arm and he held you impossibly closer. And attack? By who? The enemies of the gods were long gone and any god who tried to cause trouble was sure to be eliminated quickly. All the gods seemed troubled except a certain war god.
âGreat! Then weâll go to war!â He shouted, anger in his voice. Being the war god, you were sure it was his natural voice. Jimin started radiating a more dominating aura. You realized then that he had hidden most of it as to not freak you out. Now he glowed a luminescent light pink. You knew he was quite literally a lover, not a fighter.Â
âNow, now, how do we know this isnât just a set up?â Yoongi narrowed his eyes, clearly not wishing to discuss war on his wedding night.Â
âWell either way weâd still be under attack.â The girl beside Taehyung breathed. She had a point, you couldnât deny that. Jungkookâs eyes met briefly with Taehyungâs lover and you could almost see the spark of tension despite being a little ways away. Taehyung put himself between the two subtly. You had a feeling there was a story there.Â
âJimin?â Your voice was a whisper as to not break the very thin surface tension of the room. He squeezed your hand in response to tell you he was listening. âAre we in danger?â Your heart beat rapidly. You knew you were the most human here. You were strong, but you wouldnât last a second against a god. Okay, scratch that, you might last two seconds, being a demigod, but you were still severely disadvantaged. You didnât want to a) be a burden and b) be killed.Â
âIâll keep you safe, love.â He murmured quietly, leaning down and pressing a kiss on the top of your head. You felt your body heat up, wishing those lips to be on yours. You just nodded along, not trusting yourself to say anything else. Then there was a bang outside and the sound of the guards running. You turned to him. eyes wide.Â
Taehyung was already pushing his lover and Yoongiâs wife together, having another god usher them somewhere safe. You paused, wanting to join them. You even saw Yoongiâs wife turn and look at you expectantly. All the gods and goddesses who valued their lives were running. There was another bang and it was chaos. Those who had been frozen in place were now running and those who wished to fight were materializing their weapons. Jimin looked between you and the door, clearly debating. You gently pushed him towards his friends, knowing he wouldnât want to leave his brothers.Â
Then you pressed a quick kiss on his cheek. He flushed red.Â
âMaybe youâll get a kiss on the lips if you come back unscathed.â You joked, winking playfully as if he wasnât about to go out and face...whatever was behind that entryway door. He didnât respond, just nodding firmly. You rushed to join the other two women who were considered V.I.P.s because of their status and relationships to the inner circle. As you were ushered out of the room, you heard the door burst open and you prayed Jimin was safe.Â
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You shivered, the dress not doing any good to keep you warm. The women beside you had hardly spoken a word to you except one, who was the bride herself. She had introduced herself to you and then gone quiet. Obviously, she was worried for her new husband. The other woman was shaking like a leaf. You were surprised the relationship between her and Taehyung worked, but you knew love worked in mysterious ways. The bride offered you a small smile, pulling off her pristine white cardigan and handing it to you. You thanked her lowly before resuming your staring contest with the wall.Â
It was a nice room, a library somewhere even more underground than the underworld. The goddess of the Earth was obviously more wary of you than the one of the underworld. Though, from what Jimin had briefed you on, she had once been a human too. You were all worried sick for your loved ones, of course. No one could think of much else. The constant shouting was driving you over the edge. You just wanted some peace and quiet.Â
Having always been introverted, you didnât enjoy crowds for long periods of time. Keeping to yourself and staying out of the way was the best. As much as you disliked the gods, you and the women in the room were sharing a bond. A bond of fear. You were quite the opposite from Jimin in that way. He was a very social person, always going out of his way to talk to people, his words always smooth and graceful. You, on the other hand, were just...there. You stumbled over your words, rambled, and had trouble concealing your emotions as well as him.Â
There was a knock on the door. You all looked at each other, eyes wide and waiting for the password to be spoken. There was none. Itâs not them. You mouthed. The door flew open before you had time to react. You counted your seconds. Two seconds against a god. You had two seconds.Â
You were just confused, however, when you were met with a familiar face.Â
âMom?âÂ
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The long forgotten goddess didnât even flinch at the anger in your expression, nor the tears that betrayed your pain. It was all too much. She had changed so much. Once the goddess of wisdom, the original goddess long before Namjoon, she held herself with grace. But her frame all bones, no fat, her face was gaunt, and she looked liked she had just walked out of a halloween store. Your breath caught in your throat as she grasped your arm, hard enough to cause a whimper of pain. The other women were forced to follow along as well.Â
She escorted you out to the ballroom. You felt yourself go pale, stomach dropping to the floor as you surveyed the room. Blood, everywhere. You couldnât tell whose was whose. Gods are gods, but they bleed. And when they die, they must wait to be reborn once more. You felt your heart clench, seeing the inner circle on their knees. They looked defeated. Seokjin was comforting a sobbing girl, only to have her ripped away and whisked somewhere else. This made the elder god snarl, but he stopped almost immediately after looking at their captors. And who wouldnât?Â
They were ghastly creatures, looking like demons out of a novel of pain and horror. Some of them had melted skin, others had hollow faces and haunting stares. All brandished with various âKâs on their bodies. You noticed your mother had one on the side of her neck. The gods were arguing with someone, but you couldnât make out everything, the argument in full on Greek. Then there was a loud cough. Your mother threw forth the other two girls first. You watched Taehyung and Yoongiâs eyes go wide, before going back, completely feral, to arguing. Then your mother pulled you in close.Â
âY/N.â She said coldly, despite her seemingly motherly embrace. âYou have disappointed me greatly, I pray Kronos spares you.â Her lips were a thin line as she threw you to the ground too. You tripped over the debris and landed on your hands and knees. You looked up, meeting the eyes of Jimin.Â
You saw a quiet fury. You knew Jimin was diplomatic, he wouldnât yell, but you could feel his anger from across the room. He mouthed âI love youâ. And you frowned a little. This was not where you wanted to be confessed to. You wanted him to say to you, alone, and secluded. You selfishly wanted that. Now the enemy had stolen your first I Love Yous as well.Â
âPut her with the others.â You understood that part. The masked leader gestured to an underling who unceremoniously dragged you over to the other women. You huddled together as they shoved you into a cage with the crying girl from earlier. Yoongiâs wife wasnât crying, but she did seem to be in a state of shock. Taehyungâs lover was crying, trying to conceal her sniffles. You gently shrugged off the cardigan from earlier, handing it to her. She took it quickly, hiding her face. You even heard the smallest thank you. Underlings surrounded you like specimen, watching you like you were zoo animals.Â
âYoongi!â The bride called out, panicked. You felt it too. There was something bad coming. Then the cage moved and you felt nauseated from the sudden movement. You panicked fully for the first time. Where were they taking you?
âJimin!â You screeched, hand stretching out. His eyes widened farther.Â
âY/N!â He called back, fighting the restraints and lunging towards the cage.Â
Taehyungâs girlfriend sobbed loudly and Taehyung looked over, concern evident as he struggled to reach out, mental focus just on getting to his lover.Â
âI love you!â You cried. âPlease look for us, donât give up on us.â Came out your broken plea.Â
âIâll search the ends of the universe just to see your face, Y/N.â You heard him say. The underlings restrained him and you sat back, feeling defeated already. The others knew you werenât a goddess and they immediately babied you, knowing your body to be far more fragile from theirs. Taeâs girlfriend shot you small smiles of encouragement and you did so in return. Yoongiâs wife rubbed your back and the third mystery woman remained silent as you were driven to gods know where.Â
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Last minute A/N: OKAY OKAY I admit it, I didnât give this...a great happy ending. BUT BUT BUT I promise you a happy ending in the future-
#bts#tatawrites#of eternity and euphoria#bts x reader#jimin#park jimin#jimin x reader#fluff#god!BTS#God!Jimin#Demigod!reader#love#proof reading is dead to me#I'll just fix it later if I have the guts to reread my work
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CONSEQUENCES | CHAPTER TWELVE | LEGACIES/THE ORIGINALS
BOOK THREE IN THE SIDE CHARACTER/LILAH SERIES
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âââ シ ・ďžâ: *.â˝ .* :âďž. âââ
4TH OF J U L Y S A L V A T O R E S C H O O L
Landon was outside, trying to set up an outdoor movie session with Rafael. With his best friend in wolf form and no idea how to bring him back to normal, he just wanted to be able to make him as comfortable as possible. And that meant trying to make him a wolf den.
"So, I should probably tell you I moved rooms last month. Ours was getting painted, and I figured I'd move back in once you were, you know, you again," Landon said. "But if for any reason you become you while I'm out, like looking for ways to help you become you, I just didn't want you to go back and see that I wasn't in our room anymore and think that I bailed on you because I would never do that obviously. I also brought the photos of that mystery girl I told you about into the new room with me so the painters don't... yanno, mess them up."
Rafael approached, growling. Landon wondered what Rafael would say about the girl in the photos. He noticed that in the ones they had with her, he had a certain look on his face that Landon hadn't seen in a while. Not since Cassie. He wondered if there was perhaps something that had gone on between them, and if there was, he was sad that his best friend may never remember.
âââ シ ・ďžâ: *.â˝ .* :âďž. âââ
"No matter what path I go down, it seems like a dead end. I mean, there were at least two other people with Landon the night Malivore was destroyed," Alaric said as he walked around town square with his daughter, standing behind people holding things to decorate for the holiday. "They left fibers, footprints, hair. I just don't know who they were."
"Maybe one of them is Lilah," Josie suggested. "She had to go somewhere, and if none of us remember her, the only logical explanation is into Malivore. And that's just the point of Malivore, if someone went into the pit, they'd be erased from our memories."
"Yeah, well, that's what's haunting me," Alaric replied. "Who've we forgotten? There was two others there. It can't just be this Lilah girl."
"It couldn't have been anybody we've known. There'd be keepsakes, photos, an empty bed somewhere. We only have Lilah's, so if someone else went into that pit with her, it's not someone we knew," Josie shrugged.
"Well, whoever they were, they were important to somebody."
âââ シ ・ďžâ: *.â˝ .* :âďž. âââ
N E W
O R L E A N S
"Why is she running around and decorating the Abbatoir?" Rebekah muttered, watching as Lorelle went around the Mikaelson compound with Fourth of July decorations. "She doesn't even know that America is like, she's been dead for over a thousand years."
"Maybe she's feeling a bit patriotic," shrugged Marcel, grabbing her hands and bringing them closer to him as they sat on the couch. "Rebekah, I know you've been missing your brothers lately, and I understand you're upset with Lilah for not telling us about her identity sooner, but she's your family, babe. You guys already spent a thousand years without your niece, and now you want to spend more?"
"What does my frustration with my brother's daughter have to do with her mother running amongst decorating?"
"I think it's cute," Kol stated, making his presence in the room known as he walked over to the couch, placing his hands on the back of it. "It's Lorie's first holiday with her daughter. Maybe let her enjoy it."
"Perhaps we figure out how the mummy came back from the dead, and then we can deal with her being a mommy to Lilah."
âââ シ ・ďžâ: *.â˝ .* :âďž. âââ
"I just can't get over the fact that he's your dad," Josh said, leaning against their kitchen counter munching away on a bag of chips while Lilah cleaned the table. "This is a bigger surprise than the look on your face when you found out I was gay."
"Let it go, Josh!" Lilah yelled with laughter, sending a playful glare his way.
He shrugged, "I'm just saying. You went from Lilah Desmarais, mysterious, small, and badass to Lilah Mikaelson, deadly, unkillable, and in love within the matter of weeks."
"I am not in love!" Lilah denied, placing her hands on her hips.
Josh rolled his eyes.
"Normally, you and I spend practically every waking moment together, either here or at Rousseau's. Since you've met Roman, we've hired him to work with us, and when you're not with me, you're spending time with Mommy dearest or Mr. Mystery Blond," Josh said, pulling out facts to hit his best friend with. "Lilah, we hired him because you two wanted to spend more time together. You can't tell me that's not you being in love."
"It's been a month and a half! I only want to be around him so much because his presence helps me unlock the weird deja vu feeling I get, like there's things I need to remember,"
"Time doesn't tell what love is and isn't, and the fact that he's the key to you're weird funk might just prove my point even further," shrugged Josh.
Lilah threw the rag she was using to clean up the table at him, accidentally knocking his bag of chips out of his hand. He stood there with his jaw wide open, looking at her like she had killed someone. She shrugged, walking out of the room.
âââ シ ・ďžâ: *.â˝ .* :âďž. âââ
Lilah got to the Mikaelson compound, seeing red white and blue streamers and decorations everywhere.
"Lilah, be a dear and help me with this."
She was surprised when she saw Rebekah putting up decorations, but what really threw her was that Rebekah was speaking to her. Since her revelation about who her dad was, the relationship she had with the blonde was strained. She had been one of her best friends prior, and perhaps that's why it hurt so much. Rebekah hated when secrets were kept from her, especially since when she was rolling with just Klaus and Elijah, she would be kept out of the loop a lot.
Lilah walked over, helping her aunt put up some balloons.
"What is all of this?" Lilah asked.
"Your mother wanted to put on a little party," Rebekah explained, looking at her niece for the first time in forever. "And I'm not the type to turn one down. Especially not when it's in the honor of my family."
Lilah turned her head to the side, confused. It did touch her heart that Rebekah was finally acknowledging her, though.
"She wants everything to be extravagant. She gets to experience her firsts with her daughter, who's grown into a fine young lady," Rebekah said, before sassily adding, "Who obtained her auntie's horrible taste in men."
"I heard that," Marcel said from the balcony, where he was hanging up some more balloons.
"Good!" Rebekah called back. She turned back to her niece, "Thinking of poor taste in men, go invite that hot vampire of yours."
"You mean the one you practically threw in a dungeon?"
"We don't have a dungeon," Rebekah replied. "Though... not turning down the suggestion to make one."
"That was not a suggestion!"
âââ シ ・ďžâ: *.â˝ .* :âďž. âââ
    New Orleans during any kind of holiday seemed like a dream. The excitement, the music, the people, and the liquor. Lilah stood on the roof, faint music playing in the background. She had a drink in her head, onlooking the city her father helped build with the help of her uncle, aunt, and Marcelâwho no matter what title Lilah gave him, it sounded weird considering he was married to her aunt.
The sun was well set, which only meant that the fireworks would be starting soon. Lilah reflected on her life, how she should've felt like she was on top of the world. But the brunette could've shake the feeling that this was all fake, that she was living a lie. She was unsure why or how, but she had the strangest feeling that this wasn't the life she was meant to live.
Someone stepped onto the balcony, and she glanced over her shoulder to see Roman. He smiled at her, walking over and wrapping an arm around her waist. The two of them hadn't talked about what they were, whether they wanted to be exclusive or anything like that. Lilah kept brushing it off to Josh that they were just having fun. She knew that when fall came around, he'd go back to work, leaving New Orleans and herself behind.
But it was nice. It was nice to feel good to be wrapped in someone else's arms. She couldn't remember the last time she let herself feel something so all consuming. She denied it though, denied that her knees buckled every time the curly haired boy looked in her direction.
She denied that her dead heart fluttered when he kissed her.
She denied that it almost made her want to cry when she thought about how his departure was inevitable.
She denied that it felt wrong almost, to love someone who played even the most minor of roles in the death of Hayley Marshall.
She denied that he made her feel almost the same way Stefan once did.
She was a lot like Elijah in that way. He was big on how true love was hard to find, something he himself believed to have only found three times in his life. For his daughter, however, she could only think of one instance where she had been in love, and with her new predicament, she felt that this might just turn into the second time.
She really was a little miniature version of Elijah, whether or not he raised her.
She heard the small hum of something being shot through the sky, both of them turning their heads to the sky. People started to pour out of the compound or go onto the balcony alongside them, the sound of the party coming outside. Lilah and Roman moved to the corner together, watching as the sky lit up in beautiful colors.
She couldn't help but hold onto his hands that were on her waist or lean back into him with a giggle. She moved her arm so that one of them was around his shoulder, and he placed a kiss on her cheek.
"Happy Fourth of July," he said to her.
"It's been a pretty epic summer," she said back, smiling ear to ear.
Seeing his wide smile and dazed eyes, she knew that denying it would only get her so far.
âââ シ ・ďžâ: *.â˝ .* :âďž. âââ
A U G U S T
S A L V A T O R ES C H O O L
"Songwriting, stop," Lizzie said dramatically. "I can't take it anymore. Somewhere in Belgium, Penelope Park's black heart just exploded."
Josie gave her twin a look.
"You and Gizmo the Gremlin?" continued Lizzie, not letting up on her disgust about her sister and Landon.
"Actually, Gizmo's a Mogwai," responded Josie.
"Oh, God. He's got you speaking nerd!"
"Relax, we're just friends."
"You are not friends! You're a montage," pointed out Lizzie.
"It's been... fun," explained the brunette. "It's been like, actual fun."
"You know what's actual-actual fun? Mom and I taking the speed train to Rome for the weekend. So get your ass across the pond! Stop worrying about Dad, and stop worrying about whoever Lilah used to beâ"
"Love you," Josie said, and Lizzie gasped and Josie practically press the end button of their witchy video-call.
âââ シ ・ďžâ: *.â˝ .* :âďž. âââ
Josie and Landon looked all over the woods and the building out there, but they couldn't find Rafael anywhere. Josie and Landon continued to get closer, slowly falling for one another. Despite Rafael going missing, Landon and Josie talked about what things made them happy-ish.
Outside of the school, Dorian William's almost runs over a girl. She plays off how she knew Dorian, and acts like she's going to be on her way. She goes back into the school, knowing the gate code, feeling happy to finally be the place she called home, a place she had been longing for for who-knows-how-long.
She just wasn't expecting to come back looking for her best friends and her boyfriend, to see that they both moved on without her. That the people she loved would just fill in the gap she left when they can no longer remember her.
âââ シ ・ďžâ: *.â˝ .* :âďž. âââ
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
TAGLIST
@akshi8278
it's come to my attention that you guys don't like lorelle... LMAOO. elijah was never the type to have good taste in women (the exception of hayley) i mean... celeste??? katherine??? LOL
also, i've talked about this before since others have commented about it before, but writing a book about lilah in the vampire diaries?? i've been thinking about it a lot lately, and perhaps i love the idea because i can't let go of lilah. i mean, she's my baby. she's the first character/first book where people totally fell in love with my writing, where people have stuck with me. so, on the topic of lilah desmarais/mikaelson having a series in the vampire diaries? yes, i want to write it.
it would be a bit of an 'au' i guess. nothing about that book/series will have anything to do with lilah's storyline here, since this timeline never has lilah go be in mystic falls until the salvatore school. the only thing that would be the same is who her family is, her backstory, her friendship with katherine.
i'm thinking of writing this series as a "spin-off" but that then prompts the question: what about with the mikaelson's leave mystic falls and goes to new orleans? lilah will get to choose between staying in mystic falls or going with her family. i am excited to start this spin off. it'll still technically be "book 4" of the SIDE CHARACTER CHRONICLES, but i may write this book and book 4 at the same time.
the names i want for book one is currently:
IN THESE CIRCUMSTANCES
DISCUSSION BOARD!!
¡ did anyone actually read the book plot i just ranted about?
¡ time skipped through july and august, and now hope is out! it does take them a while to remember hope, but... what happens when roman goes back to work?
¡ i absolutely loved writing the lilah and roman fireworks scene
¡ everyone's opinions on lorelle?
¡ opinions on rebekah and lilah's relationship
#the originals#the originals rp#the originals fanfiction#the originals imagine#elijah mikaelson#Elijah Mikaelson fanfiction#elijah mikealson imagine#klaus mikaelson#niklaus mikaelson#klaus mikaelson fanfiction#klaus mikaelson imagine#freya mikaelson#rebekah mikaelson#kol mikaelson imagine#Kol mikaelson#hayley marshall#marcel gerard#hope mikaelson#davina claire#roman sienna#landon kirby#The Vampire Diaires#the vampire diaries#the vampire diaries fanfiction#the vampire diaries imagine#doppleganger#Legacies#legacies imagines#legacies cw#cw legacies
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