#but also he's FAKING HIS STUPID ACCENT!!!!!

[vulpinesaint]

so glad to see my little geralt of rivia post getting notes. i am the world's most average witcher lore understander (two seasons of the netflix show and three of the books and a bunch of time spent gleaning real lore from what people use in fanfiction) but i Do consider myself more correct than most people when it comes to understanding geralt of rivia. this is because i want to put him in a centrifuge and spin him around and my judgement is therefore unclouded by things like liking him as a character

[t3r4t0m4]

Sam Spruell mutuals, you guys are sleeping on Taken 3. Yeah sure, it's a dadsploitation nothing-film where Sam gets like less than 15 minutes of screen time,, but waiting till the end and getting to see him fire off an assault rifle in nothing but a white unbuttoned shirt and briefs and nothing else is sooooo worth it, trust

[squishosaur]

me and my beautiful wife who makes the worst jokes in the world and also wants to violently & mercilessly revolt against the upper class <333

[whimsiwitchy]

Controversially Young Girlfriend (part two)

Hugh Jackman x popstar!reader 

series masterlist & main masterlist

summary: y/n is a globally beloved pop star. She is known for her talent and dedication towards her craft. Recently, she has also been known for her preference for older men. After a breakup with her former older boyfriend, she had a run in with the hottest dilf right now, Hugh Jackman. Y/n tried to warn him, but what can she say, she has an effect on hot, older men. 

warnings: age gap (23/55), cursing, y/n used, implied shorter reader, afab reader, she/her pronouns. 

warnings will change as the story progresses! all descriptions of real people in this story are FAKE. I do not know these people and this is purely fiction. Please let me know if I missed anything!! <3

authors note: I truly appreciate every single one of you who has enjoyed this story and has shown it love. I want to have a slow start to things so I hope everyone appreciates a good slow burn lol. enjoy! <3

part two: pathetic

London was absolutely beautiful. You’d always dreamed of coming here- simply exploring anywhere out of America really. It was so fun being in a foreign place hearing silly accents all day, you loved it. You wanted nothing more than to do a world tour for your debut album but your label decided to play it safe by only touring around North America. Now that you were here, you dreamed bigger and would try your hardest to gain the fan base it took to have a world tour. Traveling was honestly one of the best perks of being famous. 

famous

It was a word you were still getting used to as it almost felt shallow to refer to yourself as such. Though it was true. You were famous. Having that interaction with Hugh and Ryan yesterday made the reality sink in even more. Two men who had been in the industry for decades knew who you were, it was mind boggling to put it simply. The embarrassment seemed to keep creeping in when you would remember your interaction between the two men yesterday. The yelp of surprise and the quick, but loud, ‘holy shit’ that was thrown from your mouth involuntarily made you cringe. Hugh asking about Pedro was something you weren’t prepared for at all either. It made sense for him to ask, if he was a close friend of Pedro’s then your name being brought up didn’t seem like the oddest thing. However, never meeting Hugh before, you wished the conversation could have been different. 

Ugh stupid hot, tall, older, Australian man that could sing. He was literally everything you found attractive bundled up into one man. You had a brief obsession with The Greatest Showman, as every theater kid did, but your celebrity crush of the movie was Zac Efron. If only freshman you could see current you, she’d probably laugh. 

Hugh had been on your mind all night and hadn’t left since you woke up this morning. If you could remember, you’d be certain he was the focus of your dreams too. The following and the comment was shocking to say the least. From Ryan’s words, they were fans but why did he follow you after he had met you instead of before. Ha, as you think about it more, it probably wasn’t even him. It was more than likely someone who was hired to run his socials, just like the person on your team that posted that photo for you. You were definitely overthinking it all…This morning when you were brushing your teeth, you kept trying to remember the feeling of his big hand on the base of your spine. It was all a bit pathetic. 

“Helloooo…earth to y/n.” Ashley, your best friend, says as she snaps her fingers in front of your face. “Are you going to tell me what has you all spaced out or do I have to deal with you moping around this entire trip?” There's a hint of annoyance in her voice. 

Ashley has been your best friend since middle school. She was always your number one supporter, so in return, you take her almost everywhere with you. Of course you invited her to London and of course she planned an entire itinerary around your busy work schedule. Her company was appreciated but it was impossible to hide your emotions from her, making moments like this difficult. 

“I’m sorry. It’s nothing really, it can wait until later.” If the two of you weren’t sitting in the middle of a small cafe, you would have told her every single thought that sat in your brain, but you couldn’t. You never knew who was listening in on your conversations. That became something you had to get used to, not being able to exist in public. It usually wasn’t too bad, for example, you could sit in a cafe with your best friend but sometimes things got out of hand and you couldn’t even walk down the street.

“Okay, you better.” She gave you an understanding nod. “So, I bought us tickets to go on the London Eye at 2pm then I thought we could go grab a late lunch or dinner, whatever you-” You’re looking at her and nodding trying your best to pay attention but you can’t. You hated the way one singular interaction with Hugh had your entire day scrambled. If you ever saw him again, you’d have to tell him off for being so hot and ruining the fun London trip you had planned. 

—

The wait for the London Eye ended up taking an extra forty five minutes and Ashley was pissed. She was a very schedule oriented person, one minute off and she’s stressed the fuck out. The entire time we waited, she complained and would have had the king on the phone if you hadn't stopped her. Her mood was unchanged by the time you stepped into your private cart.

“If I tell you all of my boy drama, would it make you calm down and enjoy the ride?” You ask slyly as you look down at the water below as the wheel starts to move the bubble you’re sitting in higher. 

She gasps and her eyes go wide.

“BOY DRAMA???” She screams out, her previous negative mood disappearing and her eyes light up with excitement.

You sigh as you gather your thoughts. 

“Well..it’s not really drama. I may or may not have a teensy crush on someone.” 

“Oh my god!! Who is it? Have I met them?” 

“Uh no. I actually just met him-” She’s cutting you off before you can finish your sentence. 

“YOU SLUT!” She yells, pointing an accusing finger at you. 

“What the hell Ash? I didn’t even tell yo-” 

“It’s Hugh fucking Jackman isn’t it? Stacy said she saw the way you looked at him yesterday. Jesus y/n, you don’t even know the guy.” She’s rambling on, judgment clear in her voice. 

“Since when are you and Stacy on talking terms?” You purposely ignore everything else she said. Ashley was jealous of Stacy for awhile. When you asked her about it she claimed that Stacy was trying to steal her best friend away. It took a lot of reassurance that the relationship you had with Stacy was work before friendship- and if she had become a good friend along the way, that was something you weren’t going to tell Ashley. 

“We can be civil when it comes to concerns for you.” 

“And what concerns are there lately?” 

“Huh… Stacy let me in on your little conversation yesterday about swearing off men for a little bit but once Hugh stepped through the door, she said that she could tell that idea was out the window.” She’s trying her hardest to keep a straight face but there was a slight smirk peeking through. 

“Oh my fucking god, you guys are so dramatic. Yes he’s fine as FUCK but like you said I dont know him. I probably won’t ever see him again.” You sigh at the end. You really wanted to see him again. 

“What even happened that has you wrapped around his finger already?” You don’t speak for a moment as you think about how to say your thoughts without feeling dumb. 

“Please don’t tell me you only have a crush on him because he’s hot…You take your crushes too far for that.” There's a look of panic resting on her face. 

“He uh…well…you know how we took the pictures yesterday for BBC?” You ask and she's nodding. “I thought he looked good but I swear I wasn’t thinking anything irrational. It was when we had to take those stupid pictures and he rested his hand on my back…Ash, I swear there was a spark or something. It felt so… I don’t know…so.. right?” The cart you’re in is sitting at the top of the wheel and you’re taking advantage of the view while you wait for Ashley to respond. When she doesn’t, you turn to look at her. She’s staring blankly at you, giving you slow blinks. 

“What?” Your voice is soft, barely above a whisper. 

“Y/n, how old is he?” Her expression is unchanging. 

“Fifty five…I googled it last night..” You were feeling ashamed of your behavior. You felt like a kid with a stupid school crush. Pathetic. 

“Hm, that’s your oldest yet. What’s next, eighty or ninety five is probably more to your taste huh?” She’s making fun of you and it hurts. You know she’s never approved of your taste in men but you can’t really help it. It’s not like you block out guys your age, they just don’t satisfy you. They’re mean, boring, and losers. You wanted a real man. Someone who was established in life and could take care of you. 

“Whatever..” You let out softly. The cart was nearing the bottom once again and you were ready to be free of the room of gossip and judgment. 

“Y/n… you know I only want what’s best for you. I mean look at what happened with Pedro and all the other men before him.” She’s sincere and you understand her point of view but you wished she would understand yours as well. 

“I know Ash. It’s just a stupid crush anyways.” It was more of a reminder to yourself rather than to Ashley. She was right, you did have a habit of taking your crushes too far. You always had to try to get the guy who held your attention but you were confident in who you were. Most times it worked but a break from dating was what was best for you. 

—

To apologize for being mean, Ashley was currently on the phone with some poor worker from one of Gordon Ramsay’s restaurants. She already made a reservation for tomorrow night but thought tonight would be better to cheer you up. You tried to reason with her by telling her that there were plenty of great restaurants in London we could get into tonight, but she insisted on having a very touristy dinner tonight instead of tomorrow, like it made any of a difference. 

“I know the reservation is for tomorrow but miss y/l/n needs it for tonight.” Her voice is strong and unwavering, determined to get a table tonight. She’s been throwing your name around left and right hoping that someone would know who you were. It all felt too pretentious for your liking but you couldn’t control Ashley when she was like this. 

You were sprawled across your hotel bed, scrolling through instagram. The voices inside your head were screaming to look at Hugh’s page, just a peak. Last night after you saw the comment, you practically threw your phone across the room, too afraid to look at it again. You're honestly thankful for that reaction because who knows how long you would have stayed awake thinking about it and diving into his life. You did make that quick google search to see just how old he was but that was the end of your exploration. 

Your fingers moved faster than your brain could process, typing his name into the search bar and clicking his profile the second it popped up. You didn’t have to scroll far into his account before your heart started to race. You clicked on a mirror selfie he had posted of him in his wolverine costume with sunglasses on. The pose and the caption really showed his age but for your sick brain, it made everything about him even sexier. You cautiously swiped out of that picture to prevent an accidental like. The next picture to catch your attention was one of Hugh in the trunk of a car. Your eyes almost jump out of your face with your tongue rolling onto the ground like the cartoons. The size of his arm was insane. You weren’t one to go for muscular men, but Hugh could choke you out with that arm any time he wanted to. His smile was so dreamy. You hadn’t seen Deadpool and Wolverine yet, not really having interest before, but now you might have to take a solo trip to the movies. You were cooked.

“Thank you, I’m glad we were able to come to an agreement. Yes tonight at 8pm.” Ashley is hanging up the phone and lets out a high pitched squeal. 

“How do you do that?” You’ve always been amazed at her negotiating skills and her ability to get whatever she wants. 

“Natural talent..also having a famous bestie doesn’t hurt.” She giggles and checks the time. Her laughter turns to a gasp. “We have to get ready, it’s already 6pm!” She’s gathering her things and as she’s rushing out of the door, she’s telling you that she’ll be back soon to get dolled up together. 

You had to learn how to style yourself over the past year of being in the limelight. Fashion was something you had been interested in but in Minden, if you dressed too out of the ordinary, people would stare. You shied away from it for longer than necessary and only recently learned how to express yourself freely thanks to your stylist, Kat. For dinner, you picked out a lengthy fitted black dress. It had the prettiest floral pattern that covered it with butterflies popping up here and there. What sold you on the dress though were the two frilly pieces of fabric that hung on either side of the dress. It was stunning and it looked even better on you. You decided on letting your hair sit in its natural state, not caring to put much effort into it. 

When Ashley came tumbling back into your room, wearing a red fitted dress, the two of you put some music on and got to work. You weren’t going for a super complicated makeup look, simply deciding on a small winged eyeliner, mascara, a dark blood red lip stain, and a hint of blush. Layering a few necklaces and adding some hooped earrings, your look was almost complete. All that was left were a pair of black heels that had two strings that you effortlessly swirled around your calf tying it into a cute bow at the top. 

“You look smoking hot! Let me take a picture of you.” Ashley whistles and grabs your phone to take a few shots. She was right, you looked good. You decided to post one of the pictures of your instagram story with a small caption that said ‘dinner time 😋’. 

What you loved about Ashley is that she took your fame with a grain of salt most of the time. When you wanted to take an uber or taxi somewhere, she never complained. You often got tired of taking private cars everywhere, wanting a little normality when you could get it. The uber ride over was a quiet one, both of you too focused on the view outside of your own windows, soaking in the reality of being in Europe. 

The restaurant was gorgeous. It wasn’t over the top fancy with normal everyday people littering the dining area, it was nice. Ashley and yourself were in quiet conversation as you looked over the menu. Feeling adventurous, you asked the waitress what she recommended and you ended up ordering the dish. Sipping on your espresso martini, you took a moment to feel grateful for the life you got to live. 

“Oh you have got to be kidding me.” Ashley is sighing with a slight roll of her eyes. 

“Good evening y/n.” A voice is approaching behind you before you could question Ashleys sudden annoyance. It was a voice you recognized, hearing it the day before. You turn around to see Hugh standing behind your left shoulder and you stand up to greet him properly. You’ve gotten accustomed to hugging almost everyone you meet nowadays, you lean in without thinking. 

“Oh my god! Hi Hugh.” There's a big grin on your face. It felt like a sign that you were seeing him again. 

“I don’t want to bother you ladies for too long. I recognized your dress and wanted to come say hi. I also wanted to apologize for bringing up Pedro yesterday, it was rude of me to do without even introducing myself first.” He lets out in his gruff voice, accent strong. His arm and yours are still interlocked in a weird side hug type of position. 

“It’s totally fine, you didn’t know.” You look into his eyes with utmost sincerity. “Oh uh, this is my best friend Ashley. Ashley, this is Hugh.” He breaks the side hug to reach to shake Ashley’s hand. 

“Nice to meet you.” Hugh lets out and Ashley responds with a short ‘you too.’ You give her a look that says ‘be nice’. 

“Well, I’ll get out of your hair. It was really nice seeing you again sweetheart.” He smiles down at you.

“It was nice seeing you again as well.” 

“Here let me.” He’s motioning to your chair. You take a seat and he's pushing it forward for you. 

“Thank you.” Looking back at him with a shy smile. He gives your shoulder a squeeze of acknowledgment and he’s walking away. 

“Maybe the universe does want you with a man old enough to be your grandfather. I mean what are the fucking odds of running into him at a Gordon Ramsay restaurant.” Ashley lets out in total disbelief. 

You don’t say anything, you give a sly shrug instead. The rest of the dinner is tame. The food was delicious and you felt woozy from the martinis you’d been downing. Ashley let you know half way through the dinner that Hugh was sitting not to far from us and that he ‘had a fucking staring problem’, her words exactly. It made you giddy to think he was looking over here and if you begged Ashley to trade seats with you it was no one else's business. She obviously refused and you spent the rest of your time focusing on your friend, with Hugh sitting in the corner of your mind. 

When you got back to the hotel, you immediately stripped yourself from your heels and dress. Laying in the bed in nothing but your undergarments, you opened instagram and took a look at your story one more time, wanting to see just how good you looked. It was shallow for sure but it made you feel good. You saw the hearts flooding the bottom of the screen and decided to swipe up to see who had liked it. As you scrolled nothing really caught your attention until that name caught your eye again.

“I recognized your dress and wanted to come say hi.” 

What the actual fuck.

thank you for reading <3

part three

series taglist: @chronicallybubbly @spideybv28 @pear-1206 @robertthehoover @reidsworld @bloody-bunni666 @quillycrow @kythefangirl25 @bluetimeombre

I think I got everyone tagged that asked to be! If you want to be added/removed let me know. <3

[impperfectcritiques]

Beelzebub Redesign

Ramble/rant below

I made this design while keeping in mind some of her roles and themes of her character.

That said, I'll go over the parts of her character I HATED/sucked in general.

Her hair and tail were far too confusing for what it was meant to represent, shes supposed to be a fennec fox, bee, fly, demon, and her having lava lamp hair is cool, but steals the fennec foxes iconic tail and doesnt scream insect either. This along with the mess of hair at the front of her head just ruins the overall silhouette. The spikey mess of hair is one of the only places, outside of her snout and fingers that shit sharp and its just ew.

That said the lava lamp idea is very nice and I love me some lava lamp vibes!

Fennec foxes were chosen for her species due to hell hounds, which is odd coz theyre not canines? AND coz theyre, quoting viv, "Greedy". Thematically this is stupid, coz shes the sin of GLUTTONY.

"She cant be fat, coz its fatphobic to have the sin of gluttony be fat" I disagree, over indulgence of food is a leading factor for obesity, and that shouldnt be a controversial thing to say! Over indulgence doesnt make a person horrible, gross or evil, but thats what people who argue this point seem to try state. This along with the constant fat phobia from both Vivs shows and how Mammon is allowed to be fat, supposedly because hes a man, is horrendous.

Shes so fake and the writing tries to make it seem like shes not?? like she's toxic positivity and that isnt bad, like???

The lore with the hell hounds and bee annoys the shit out of me. Like HOW THE HELL are hell hounds the bottom of the heirachy?? Theyre the guard dogs, they are the enforcers of hells boarders, they are simply the most powerful creature, aside from the kings, they keep everyone in check, like?????

My rewrite and redesign:

Shes a horse, as stated in the image, to fit the circus theme, and to reference some play on words and quotes. Y'know, some actually smart themes. Also horses have a lot of flies around em soooo...

Shes A FAT PARTY QUEEN AND THATS WONDERFUL.

MLP inspos coz Blitz loves horses and Celestias and Lunas hair were inspos for her in the first place.

Leg fluff is a reference to bees and how they hold pollen, along with Clydesdales to further the horse theme. The texturing and colour is to hint towards her being a mass of flies. Also leg warmers for a 80s vibe.

Actual antennae, insectoid feet, larger wings. She is a shape shifting mass of flies.

Kept the colours coz orange is the colour for gluttony, and blue is a nice accent colour. Added some more dark colours too to balance out the bright and light colours.

More references to party culture, with the beads and binky!

She does pig out (like eating contexts and gets messy! wish i could over indulge like that but i'd totally vomit + i find it wasteful, but power to her!) < This is to be opposed to Vivs ver where shes hypocritically disgusted by mammon doing the same.

I think out of the sins, shes the most agreeable, along with sloth, who is the least demonic. But dont touch her food, YOU WILL DIE. But you can ask for food, she caters so well! No one in her ring goes hungry!

Cerberus would actually exist and be in charge of boarder control and the hell hounds. He gets mad at her for over feeding his denizens.

She wouldnt have that stupid human trafficking bullshit that makes no sense for her character.

Replace the hell hound who is thousands of years younger then her and literally her slave with Cerberus who is her equal and such blah blah.

Any thoughts? Feel free to share.

[jazzyoranges]

Save a horse, ride a cowboy

Tara Carpenter x fem!reader (r is also implied to be more masculine-leaning)

Summary: Tara rides you 🤷‍♀️ no Ghostface au

Words: 3.5k

A/n: the card game they play is called “do or drink” so if you don’t understand the rules here, search it up and it’ll probably make more sense

Warnings: G!P reader, explicit sex, unprotected sex (you pull out dw), blowjob, face fucking, Tara lowkey has a size kink, R has a praise kink lol, service top!R, power bottom!T (i think? idk positions that well)

MINORS DNI!!

Tara didn’t really feel like being at this party. Unfortunately for her, she was a victim of peer pressure by Mindy. The twin said something about “getting laid” and how Tara needed to “get some”, but in all honesty, she wasn’t actually listening

The party she was at was cowboy/southern-themed, and Tara opted to wear some plaid and a white crop top. Chad went fully cowboy, through. Tara said he looked like a dork, but his eyes were set on looking like someone from Red Dead Redemption. The brunette didn’t know how he did it, but Chad didn’t even look half bad. Tara swears he has a superpower at looking stupid and not stupid at the same time

Mindy on the other hand, did the least. The twin adorned a black shirt and a brown leather jacket with southern-ish accessories

Chad didn’t bother knocking or ringing the bell over the loud music, and he let himself, Mindy, and Tara into the house. There was a familiar smell in the house. Weed and alcohol absolutely flamed her nostrils, and she scrunched up her nose. When Tara’s eyes landed on you, she swore you were a goddess straight from Texas heaven

“Mindy.”

“I see her, Tara”

“Mindy.”

“No straight woman wears a wife beater. You’re in the clear”

In Tara’s favor, Chad yelled your name and waved you over

“Mindy, Tara, this is Y/N! She coached me back in Woodsboro. She’s also from Texas, so i invited her to show up all the fake cowboys like me” The football player slung an arm around your shoulder, and you held out your hand for the two girls to shake

“Nice to meet you two” Your accent was practically nonexistent, but certain words have you away. When your hand meets Tara’s, yours engulfs hers and she swears she can feel her heart beating in her throat

“Chad speaks well of y’all”

“Really? I’m surprised” Mindy laughs, but Tara is too busy sweating over you to engage in conversation

“I’m gonna introduce Y/N to the rest of our friend group, i’ll see you two around!”

“Have a good night, you two” You tip your hat with a wink, and follow after Chad

“So, wanna explain?” Mindy sends a knowing glance at Tara, a small smirk on her face

“Absolutely not.” The shorter girl makes her way into the kitchen, pouring herself a solo cup of whatever alcohol she can find. Tara chooses to ignore the burning sensation down her throat

“Nope, you’re going to talk right now. I didn’t even know you were into women like her”

“Neither did i, that’s the problem” Tara groans, covering her face with her hands

“What’s the plan?”

“There is no plan, Mindy. I don’t even know how to get close to her…” Eros or Aphrodite must’ve been listening real close because not a second later, she sees you being dragged around by Chad, rounding up a few people to play a drinking card game

“Tara! Mindy! Play drinking games with us? Ethan, Quinn, Y/N, Amber, Wes, Anika, Liv, a few other people and i are playing”

Mindy nods, and they follow you two to the living room, where all the aforementioned people were sitting. Some on the couch and some on the floor. You took your spot on the floor with Chad on your left, and Quinn on your right on the couch.

Chad clears his throat, and all eyes are on him. “Alright! Rules are simple. Everyone has to draw a white card, and do what it says. If you get a white card that says ‘Draw’, you have to get a black card and either do what it says, or drink however much it tells you. Make sense?”

The group nods, and small discussions are made between people. Tara is seated between Mindy, who’s talking to Anika, and Ethan, who’s talking to Chad

“Since i’m the one that wanted to play, i will graciously go first” Chad pulls his white card, and his face lights up. “War! Challenge another player to an arm wrestle. The loser must drink”

The twin gets up, and he points straight at your forehead. “Y/N! This cowboy challenges you in a duel of our arms!”

“How could i say no. I agree to your challenge, my good sir” You shake hands, and make your way to the coffee table in the middle of the room. Tara is on your right, and you give her a perfect view of your bicep

“You look nervous, Chad. Are you afraid?”

“You can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Therefore, the student always wins” he smiles at you, and your competitive side starts to bubble up

“When i win, i’ll make sure to spoon feed you your own words” readjusting your grip on Chad’s hand, Ethan makes his way over to be the referee

“Three…”

Tara notices your concentrated face, and how you bite your lip in anticipation

“Two…”

You adjust your grip once again, and Tara wonders what else your hands can do

“One!” Ethan lets go of yours and Chad’s attached hands, and they both stay in place. Tara can tell you two were pretty evenly matched

“C’mon, Y/N! Gag him!” Mindy cheers for you

“Don’t listen to her, babe. You got this!” Liv cheers for Chad

“Show him up, Y/N! You’ve got it” Tara cheers with a smile on her face, and you momentarily stop pushing before you catch yourself

“What’s the matter, Y/N? Losing already?”

“We’ll see” When you hear Tara say your name again, a new urge to win rushes through your body. In one swift motion, Chad’s hand meets the table, and those who were supporting you cheer

“What did you say about the student always winning?” You say with a wide grin on your face, and you kiss your arm in a show of ego

“That was a fluke! I want a rematch!” The twin says playfully

“Like you wouldn’t just lose again”

“Whatever, it’s your turn to draw”

You pick up a card, and you laugh to yourself. “Vote! On the count of three, everyone points to the person they think has had sex in the most interesting spot. The player with the most votes must confess their sex spot and take a drink”

“Alright! Three, two, one!” You count down, and mostly everyone is mostly pointing at Quinn

“Geez, what do you guys think of me?” She takes a sip of her drink. “And my most interesting spot was under the bleachers during his football practice”

This goes on until it’s Tara’s turn. Amber got an “All brunettes must drink” card, Anika got to be Simon in Simon Says (which Tara had to drink for losing first), and Mindy drew a card that made all of the single people drink. Luckily for Tara, you drank when Mindy pulled her card

“Your turn, Tara! What’ll you get?” Chad quickly made himself the keeper of cards, sitting in the middle as you sat on the couch in his place. Tara leans over, and she takes a card from Chad. Revealing her card, she see’s it says to draw

“Our very first ‘Draw’ card! I wonder what it’ll be” Chad grins, and Tara pulls a black card from the deck

“Spin a bottle. Whoever it lands on, sit on their lap for the next 2 rounds or both must drink four times”

Oohs are exchanged throughout the group, and Tara rolls her eyes in embarrassment. Less than a second later, Chad hands Tara an empty beer bottle. The twin takes his spot somewhere in the circle, and the brunette spins the bottle

“I’ll pray it lands on her” Mindy playfully nudges her shoulder, and Tara blushes. Neither of you knew it, but both you and the brunette hoped the bottle ended up pointing at you. It went around once, twice, three times

Slowly passing by the person to your right, the bottle points straight at you and you swear time stops for a second. Tara meets your eyes, and you swear she’s blushing when Mindy shoves her towards you

Tara awkwardly sits on your lap, moving to find a comfortable spot

You place a reassuring hand on her hip. “You know you don’t have to do this, right? If you’re uncomfortable, nobody is gonna judge you” Tara can feel your hand leave her side, and the smaller girl has to physically stop herself from letting out a whine of frustration

“I’m not uncomfortable. I just… need to adjust.” The brunette not-so-accidentally grinds her hips against yours, and she swears she hears you let out a tiny groan

It’s Wes’ turn next, but Tara can’t focus as she gropes around the couch for your hands. The alcohol in her system takes over when she leans back into you, and makes you wrap your arms around her torso. You happily oblige

“You having a good night, so far?”

Tara decides to be bold. “It’s definitely better in your lap”

Despite your semi-hard cock uncomfortably rubbing against your jeans, you try your best to learn more about Tara. Asking how her day was, what she’s majoring in, if she has any family; all while the brunette causes more friction by slowly rubbing her ass on your crotch. You have to suppress many moans as she not-so-casually grinds on you

Tara learns that you used to work on a family farm in Texas, but moved to California for college. You told her about the animals, the pumpkin patches, and looking up at the stars with your siblings

Not even noticing it’s your turn again, Chad has to remind you to draw a card. You instantly miss Tara’s heat when she crawls off your lap so you can draw a card. The game goes on for the next hour or so, and you can barely remember what you had to do after all the drinks you’ve had

You end up having to quit the game halfway through when you refuse to send a nude photo of yourself to a random number or take a drink. Tara’s card no longer applies very early on, but she actively decides to sit in your lap for the rest of the game

Amber kicks out the rest of the party-goers around 1 am, and you’ve been tasked to drive Tara and Mindy home. Somehow you’re the least drunk. Since Chad was their ride and he’s off somewhere making out with Liv, you so graciously offered to drive them home.

The ride to Mindy’s house was quiet, but it was a comfortable quiet. You tapped on the steering wheel to the soft music, Mindy was half asleep, and Tara was discreetly trying to look at you from the passenger seat. You dropped Mindy off at her place, and now you were on your way to Tara’s house. The moonlight was hitting your eyes in the right way, causing them to sparkle the tiniest bit Tara had a little staring problem

“Do i have something on my face?”

“Do you want to stay over at my place?” The brunette blurts out, instantly regretting her words. “I mean- uh, if you want…”

“Sure, i’d like to stay over. I’m pretty sure i have some extra clothes in here, anyway. Any scary dogs i should beware of?”

“Does my sister count?”

“Only if she bites” This earns a laugh from Tara, and you mentally pat yourself on the back

“Definitely beware of her. She’s staying at her boyfriends place tonight, so you’re good”

“Noted” You pull into the Carpenters driveway, and both of you get out. Grabbing an extra hoodie, shirt, and shorts, you follow Tara into her house

“Bathroom is on the left. Do you want to watch a movie?”

“Sure, you can pick”

“You’re gonna wish you never said that. Let’s watch The Babadook”

“Seriously? Dude, i used to jump like six feet in the air when the floor boards creaked in the barn”

“You’ll live” Rolling your eyes at her words, you made your way to her bathroom to change. You made sure to freshen up, even though you two were just watching a movie. The smell of buttered popcorn filled your lungs and you could faintly hear the popping kernels

When you leave her bathroom, Tara’s already changed into something more comfortable

“Do we have to watch something scary? Can’t we watch a sitcom or something?”

“Listen, you let me decide but we don’t have to if you don’t wanna” Tara finds her seat on the couch, your shoulders touching when she sits down the bowl of popcorn between you two

“But i will think you’re a pussy”

“The Babadook it is” You click play on the remote, and Tara lays her head on your shoulder. She barely pays attention to the movie, considering she’s seen it far too many times. Instead, the brunette opts to watch you and all of your reactions. You’ve raised the blanket up under your nose and leaned into Tara about 20 times, and the movie is just about halfway through

Every now and again you’d flinch in anticipation, and Tara would rub your thigh in support. You don’t know if your heart is beating due to the movie, or due to Tara practically being on top of you for the second time this night

When the movie ends and the credits roll, you can only stare at the black screen and Tara lets out a laugh

“So, what do you think?”

“I don’t think i’ll be able to sleep tonight, Tara”

“You’ll be okay” The brunette pats your cheek

“Can we watch something lighter? Like My Little Pony?”

“Of course you were a horse girl”

“Actually i was an Equestria Girls girl, thank you” You huff

“Tomato, potato, they were all ponies” Tara rolls her eyes, and smiles “I think i have another horror movie you’ll like. Well, it’s technically a trilogy”

“Absolutely not! I’d like to be able to close my eyes tonight and not hallucinate a monster leaning over me”

“There’s a scene where two girls kiss”

“…Fine.”

An hour in, the two main girls are making out in their bras, and you’re staring quite intensely at the scene. Something in the room shifts, and all of a sudden you start to feel hotter. Tara goes from rubbing your thigh to slowly dragging her hand to your crotch, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind. Your breath hitches when she starts to rub your clothed cock

“A-Are we about to do the thing?” You say unsure, but the brunette is already pulling you off the couch and leading you to her room

Before you know what’s happening, Tara is guiding you into her bedroom and pushing you up against a wall. Her kisses are hungry and fast, wanting to taste every part of you. When she starts to fiddle with your shorts, you let out a small laugh at how she huffs in frustration

“Take it off, already.”

“Someone’s needy” You tease

“I’ve been eye fucking you all night. I’m not waiting any longer. I had to drag you here myself”

“I didn’t know if i was reading your signals wrong…” You mumble, and Tara hates how adorable you look. God why were you cute and hot at the same time

“I was grinding on you the entirety of those two rounds at the party”

“You said you were adjusting! I thought my lap was uncomfortable!”

“I hate how the oblivious ones are always the hottest.” Tara finally manages to pull down your shorts through shaky hands, and she feels her mouth water when she sees the small tent in your underwear

“Spider-man boxers?” the shorter girl quirks an eyebrow at you

“I didn’t think i’d have sex tonight” You suck in a breath when Tara starts to rub your cock through your boxers

“Really? You didn’t think you’d get laid tonight looking like this” Tara motions to your entire body with her non-busy hand. “Maybe i should show you how pretty you are. Do you want that, baby?” The brunette squeezes your cock; and you nod, not trusting your voice to do anything but moan

As she gets on her knees, Tara pulls down your boxers just enough to reveal your hardened dick

“Jesus, you’re big…” The brunette says to herself, but you can feel your ego boost at her words. Tara starts to lick the veins on your shaft, and you can feel her massaging your balls. Your cock is drooling pre-cum when Tara kisses your tip, and you let out a breathy moan

“Please, Tara…”

“Tell me what you want, baby”

“Please let me fuck your mouth”

“Let me adjust to your size first. I’ll let you know when you can start, does that sound good?”

“A-Anything you want”

“You’re cute.” Tara kisses your tip again before taking it into her mouth, eliciting a moan from your throat. She swirls her tongue in a way that drives your crazy. Her hands make their way around your thighs, and Tara squeezes your ass as she takes half your cock into her mouth. The brunette squeezes your balls and you hear her gag as her nose meets your lower abdomen. The sight of Tara deepthroating your cock almost makes you cum

“Fuck.” You breathe out. You try backing away to give Tara a little room to breathe but she just ends up making you thrust into her mouth, making her gag. You pull her face away from your cock not wanting her to choke, and the shorter girl wipes a little drool off her chin

“Why’d you do that?” Tara asks, a little annoyed

“I didn’t want you to run out of breath. Your eyes were watering”

“It’s nice how much you care about me. I can assure you i can handle your cock, baby. It helps you taste good”

“If it ever gets too much or becomes uncomfortable, squeeze my hand” You tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, and Tara’s heart flutters at how soft you’re being despite the situation

“I promise i’ll let you know if it starts to become too much, baby” The brunette kisses your tip once again and dives right back into sucking your dick. When you look down and she gives you a small nod, your hands tangle in her hair. You start off with small thrusts, slowly going faster as Tara gets used to your size

“F-Fuck you’re amazing” Your balls slap against her chin, and Tara almost cums at how dirty it feels having you fuck her throat like a fleshlight

“Shit, i’m gonna cum, Tara…” You moan, and the brunette gives you a pleading look. You can only assume it means ‘Please cum down my throat’, so that’s exactly what you do. You release your load in her mouth with a groan, and Tara happily swallows all of it down. When she pulls away from your cock, you use your thumb to wipe away the leftover cum on her chin. Tara takes your thumb in her mouth, and licks away the rest of your semen

She gets off her knees, and gets up to pull you into another searing kiss. You can taste yourself on her tongue, and you moan into her mouth at the flavor

“Jesus, you’re still hard?”

“I have the stamina of a stallion” You shrug, feigning a big ego

“Oh, yeah? How about i ride you and we’ll see if you can handle it”

“You have such a beautiful way with words”

“I’d be mad about the teasing of you weren’t cute. Hurry up and get naked, already”

“Yes ma’am” Barely a second passes before Tara’s lips are on yours. In a flurry of heat, both of your clothes end up strewn about her bedroom. Tara pushes you onto her bed. She straddles your lap and kisses you with a new wave of confidence and fervor. When the brunette urges you to lay back, you have to actively keep your jaw closed at the sight of Tara. Unfortunately for you, she notices your staring

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer”

“Can i really?”

“Mm… maybe next time”

Your face lights up. “Next time?”

“After you take me on a date first. We can talk about the specifics later” Tara softly kisses the bridge of your nose, making you close your eyes and blush

“Right now, i want you in me.�� The brunette on top of you lines up your tip with her pussy, slowly sinking down your shaft

“Fuck,” Tara takes the rest of your cock in her, and you massage her hips when you can feel her squeezing around you “You feel so good, baby”

Noticing how you moan at her praise, Tara takes note of this. She starts to move up and down, and the feeling of her around you earns a whimper from your throat. Moans are exchanged as Tara starts to ride you faster, constantly increasing her pace

“I’m close, Tar” You breathe out, letting her nickname slip through your lips

“Fuck i am too, baby. You’re so big” Her words are reinforced as she starts to tighten around your cock, and you have to use all your strength to pull out. You ejaculate your cum all over your stomach, and so does Tara. When you both come down from your high, the brunette notices how you’re still somehow hard

“Round two?”

—

A/n pt.2: cookie if you can guess the second movie they watch

[phant0mth1ef]

chapter 3: stupid, stupid game.

“so how sure are we about your boyfriend not wanting a boyfriend?” the sudden voice made you jump, you’d forgotten how often monoma liked to show up uninvited, especially when it was late at night and you were already weary of intruders.

“what? i don’t have a boyfriend.” you poured the blueberries into the mixture beforing combining them with the batter.

“i know that. i meant bakugou.” monoma made his way to your fridge, opening it and picking out a snack you’d frequently bought just because of how often he was over at your place.

“oh. well what makes you say that?” you were quiet, too quiet for monoma’s liking. he frowned.

“well, he’s always rambling about stupid deku this, stupid deku that.” he spoke while eating his food, a pet peeve he knew you had.

“hey, are you okay?” monoma asked once he finished, you’d been silent and your main focus was watching your muffins rise in the oven.

“m’fine.” you mumbled, eyes not once leaving where your pan sat on the second rack.

“is this about that shindo thing? you’re not over him?”

“s’not about shindo. s’about the fact that he was able to go pro after everything he did to me. just not fair.” you sighed, rubbing your eyes.

“well, i can assure you that he’s a second rate hero at best. nothing special. and i would know, i’m the most special in terms of heroes. also think of it this way, if you do end up getting bakugou, you could totally make shindo feel like shit.” monoma head to where your dishes were sitting in the sink, turning on the water and grabbing the sponge. after all, he was the one who ate most of your treats, he should be the one to clean up.

“i guess you’re right.” you sat on the counter next to the sink, monoma’s blonde hair sticking out in contrast to your dark themed kitchen.

-

bakugou didn’t know what urged him to watch your stream. he didn’t really know how he got to your page, seeing that your profile picture was a manga panel of gojo, perfect for your username.

he didn’t know how he ended up staring at his phone at night, nor how he ended up actually laughing at your commentary.

at first, he’d only watched your stream because kirishima had put him onto it, saying how you were genuinely a pretty funny person aside from all the thirst comments that you’d make about pro hero dynamight.

of course, he couldn’t let your ego get inflated so he was under a screen name.

you didn’t know that. so you’d continued to speak freely about the pro hero, even while you were in the lobby waiting to respawn.

“as i was saying, lowkey dynamight would make a great father. but i-.” your voice was cutoff as you were killed by someone under the username phant0mth1ef on fortnite, your bestfriend’s laugh echoing through your headset as you stopped, your viewers watching as your mouth dropped open. bakugou watching as your mouth dropped open.

you ended the call with monoma, and closed the fortnite app as your face stayed the same, your mouse racing across the screen as you put your headset down, getting up from your chair to go grab a snack.

“why do people play fortnite. it’s a stupid, stupid game it does not work.” a fake german accent in your voice as your door open and shut. your viewers continuing to talk in your chat.

and for the first time since watching your streams, bakugou let out a genuine laugh.

tags! : @sukunasbottomlefteyeball @pixiesluver @kanvis

[themeraldee]

AY the southern stylist ask was delicious ik that was a while ago but I'm scrolling through lol. But like what if he came in one day, really rough day, madlyn was on him, the media too. Just pissy baby energy. And then she sees him and immediately can tell something is wrong, especially when he doesn't chat or smile like he usually does and before she can think she's cupping his cheek and just going "Sugar, you seem down. What's wrong baby?" Of course in like that southern way where baby can be used platonically but she sees the effect it has on him and goes 'oh mommy issues, that makes sense. Welp gotta lock in now'

[follow up to this - sort of]

Stupid Stan and his stupid fucking lectures. Homelander slams the door to the dressing room open. It leaves a dent in the wall but he doesn’t care as he slams it back shut.

Fucking Stormfront. Where does Stan get off thinking he gets to decide who goes in the Seven for god sakes?! Undermined again, being made to feel like a petulant child—again!

He’s so frustrated there might as well be steam coming out of his ears. And now he has to prance around at a premiere for fucking Tek Night Lives and pretend like his life doesn’t feel like it’s unraveling. 

Homelander sits himself in the makeup chair staring at a reflection of himself. He can’t even contort his face to a neutral state. He watches as his jaw tightens, his Adam's apple moving with a gulp and his tongue pushing his lip out when he runs it across the top of his teeth in frustration. He can’t stop fidgeting and flexing his muscles. He’s doing anything he can to take away the urge to scream and tear anyone nearby piece by piece.

He’s so distracted, stewing in his own persistent thoughts that he gets caught off guard by the two gentle hands that land on his shoulders, jumping a little in surprise.

For a moment he forgot about this. About you. About the only good thing he seems to have left these days. Something positive to come back to.

"Honey, you look all kinds of stressed. What's eatin' at ya? You alright baby?" The honeyed drawl of your sweet southern accent almost does the job at untangling the coil of frustration and anger in his gut.

“It’s nothing.” He raises his hand sweeping it through the air, brushing it off with a tight fake smile. He doesn’t want to appear so frazzled in front of you but he’s so on edge, filled with this angry energy that there’s no way for him to keep calm.

“Now, don’t you go tellin’ me it’s nothin’. I can see it all over your face.” You brush your fingers through his hair as if to expose his face even more, not allowing him to hide behind any loose strands.

“Come here.” You walk around the chair, your hand sliding down from his shoulder all the way down his arm so you can slip your hand into his gloved one, pulling him out of the seat.

Vought always spends too much money on things that don’t matter. That’s why this dressing room is fully decked out. To your advantage now, it also includes a nice couch that you lead him to.

Sitting down on the edge you urge him to follow you. Homelander feels even more lost now but for a different reason. Yet he’s not one to refuse close contact. Grateful that he still holds some respect among Vought employees as the increased time he’s demanded for his hair and makeup prep is coming in handy now more than ever. At first it was a thinly veiled attempt at seeing more of you, at hearing more from you. Now it comes with extra perks he didn’t even think would be an option. 

“Come on now, don’t be shy, sugar. Rest your head here, you need to relax.” You tap your lap, giving him the green light to continue. 

He slowly lays down on your lap, his head facing away from you.

“There ya go. Nice and relaxed.” Your hands automatically slide into his hair, your nails gently scratching his scalp, as if scratching the tension right out of him.

Homelander lets himself melt into you, accidentally humming out loud in pure bliss. How can something so simple do him so much good? 

“Feels good, don’t it baby?” The way your fingers manage to melt the tension out of every inch of his body makes Homelander think that you might have a superpower of your own.

“Sure does.” He says in a lazy tone, a dead giveaway to his blissed out state.

He ends up turning around to face you and the ceiling. After a few minutes of pure indulgence he catches your hand before it does another round of running through his hair and stroking down his cheek and instead he brings it to his lips, kissing the back of it soundly, closing his eyes to enjoy the gesture as much as he can. 

He sits back up and you lean in to place a sweet kiss on his cheek. One that gets him all flustered, his once tense exterior now replaced with that cute boyish smile and a carefreeness spread across his face. “That’s better.” You comment on his smile.

"Now, how 'bout we get you back in that chair so I can work some of my magic on your hair after I’ve gone and messed it up some, huh? What do ya say, sweetheart?”

“Yeah, let’s.”

[sheepinthebigcity]

Propaganda under the cut

Tobey: "I am once again nominating the child evil super genius. Also I think his fake accent is hilarious god he’s so stupid."

"IM VOTING FOR TOBEY Y'ALL 🔥🔥"

Cedric (Dealer's Choice): "CEDRIC CEDRIC CEDRIC CEDRIC"

"CEDRIC PICK CEDRIC PLEASE PICK CEDRIC"

[yestrday]

here to request yandere blue lock crumbs.. anything would do, whether its headcanons, scenarios etc... i just wanna see you write for any of those feral boys hehe

hm. i'm thinking of yandere! poly! isagi, kurona, & hiori with their darling... grgrglrllrgrlrl

i feel like, kurona would absolutely be passive in this relationship. he's very people-pleaser and less leader, and he's content in doing so. he doesn't quite mind the power imbalance between him and hiori and isagi, and actually thinks it's pretty preferable. it puts him on more equal grounds with you.

isagi is generally nice when you or hiori aren't pushing his buttons... or when he isn't excited. he's never gotten in a fight that hasn't been resolved quickly with kurona, but it's an entirely different situation with hiori. they both find the thrill of riling each other up arousing, while you and kurona (unless you want to join in a fight that you can't handle) just watch on the sidelines.

hiori is also pretty nice, but fakely so. you know he's hiding his sadistic tendencies behind that pleasant country accent of his. more often than not, he's pinching your cheeks, biting your skin, and poking you with a fork. he mostly wins his fights with isagi, but he and kurona have a pretty cozy relationship. you just can't get mad with kurona.

they're both veryyyy different lovers. kurona's quite normal, if it weren't for the fact that he's a bit too devoted. he does whatever you want whenever, so long as you don't try to get away from them. if you ask him, he'll let you out of the house for a walk so long as he goes with you. isagi and hiori have told him multiple times not to, but kurona just can't resist giving you what you want.

isagi could be normal, but he's got that manipulative streak in him. he'll play nice to lull you into a false sense of security before he bullies for being stupid. it's a bit exciting to see you cry and depend on him. of course, isagi's still kinda sane, so he has his domestic moments. he dotes on you a lot when he's in his right mind, needy for your attention and pouty when you don't give it.

hiori's just a sadist all the way through. it would be more bearable if he was just a sadist, but he likes to play nice too. unlike isagi where you don't know when he'll have a personality switch, hiori just outright tortures you while he wears that pretty smile. he'll seat you in his lap as he plays a horror game, kurona and isagi chilling on his sides, while your already shaken nerves are put under even more pressure as you get a first ticket seat to bloody jumpscares. hiori is just psychological warfare in one body.

[vulpinesaint]

listen i am geralt of rivia hater number one but one thing i actually CANNOT stand is when the fandom mischaracterizes him. took one look at this man who speaks very straight-forwardly and matter-of-fact and is a little recalcitrant with his words sometimes and went "haha he communicates in grunts! man who only says 'hm'!" and then won't even write him to speak in full fucking sentences. hello???? hello???????? yes the netflix show was a bad influence on everybody because they were trying too hard to depict geralt as a stoic manly badass but we CANNOT let that distract us from the REAL thing to make fun of geralt for. which are his Constant Unprovoked Monologues

[j3110-cup]

Matthew Patel general headcanons! ^_^

(some of these are ideas from other peoples headcanons as well! I'm not claiming any of these as completely original,, I just think they're AWESOME and i wanna write them down. I'm very sorry if my headcanons seem like they're stealing from anyone, that is not my intention and if wanted I can remove anything that seems too simliar to an idea that anyones already posted.) - Matt has a hobby of painting his nails sometimes, the only colors he's been seen with are black, gray, and red. But black is the most common color he chooses, its easy and he likes black in general. - though Matthew ALSO has a hobby of chewing his nails (mostly just for stimulation purposes, he likes doing things with his hands a lot when hes bored.) so this ends up in clipped nail polish a lot of the time. - smell wise, I think he has an odd smoky scent, not like cigarette smoke or anything but just smoke in general, like burning wood. With a light hint of vanilla. - I feel like hes skilled with his fire powers yet also notttt...? like he KNOWS how to control them in a battle and hes good at it. -But also he accidently sets them off sometimes without realizing, mostly when hes feeling intense emotions or nerves. - OKAY. HEAR ME OUT ON THIS ONE. I feel like in the late 2000s, Matthew would REALLY enjoy making Youtube sketches online, you gotta understand. HE WOULD LOVE BEING A CONTENT CREATOR!! I think he would have a lot of fun with having a small 'fanbase' and being able to post his ideas online. - continuing onto that, I also think he'd have a blog. Its a half and half of him talking about his favorite productions/movies and also him complaining about random stuff. He probably would think roleplaying is fun but this might be me projecting at this point. - I think he has a hard time balancing his confidence and insecurity, like its a very MIXED bag of how he feels about himself. Sadly hes pretty easy to shut down when hes confident as well I think, since his confidence is mainly just 'fake it till you make it' except he isnt fully there yet. - Matthew likes playing around with his style sometimes, especially if someone around him gives him clothes or asks him to put something on. I think he wouldnt be too into bright colors, but he'd play around with some things on himself. Like different kinds of makeup, jewelry, etc. - I feel like he has dyslexia. I dont have anything else to add I just stole this one from my friend, but its canon in my mind. - I think he has a mix of an Indian and American accent. (this headcanon exists in my mind mainly due to the fact that in Satya's audition for Matthew in the movie he used a mix of an Indian and American accent as well and i thought it was a very nice touch.) - speaking of America, I feel like Matthew grew up in the South-West of USA, I dont have a reason for this I think its just projection again. - he's actually very close with his demon hipster chicks (I also might actually post about the demon girls soon as I also have my own hcs on them) Since I like to think he summoned them in highschool and they've kinda just stuck around since. - I think hes a decent singer, though singing is something he enjoys just both as a pastime and as a career goal, so he'd practice often. - I feel like the same thing can be said with acting in general, he enjoys practicing a lot on his acting skills, he'd probably think improv is really fun. - probably a people pleaser due to how he just acts sometimes, I dont know I just feel it in my bones. okay I'm done :P also I feel like I might need to add; my idea of Matthew in my head is mainly a mix of all four medias of him, so this isnt supposed to be about any Matthew in particular. sorry for any grammar mistakes I dont have any excuse I'm just stupid!!

[steddieas-shegoes]

sometimes it's too real

for the @steddieholidaydrabbles warm up round 3 (prompt: Halloween) rated: T wc: 577 cw: some blood mentions (fake and real) tags: mention of Upside Down related trauma, hurt/comfort

🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃

Eddie thought it was a funny joke, and it was.

Like, to all of the others, it was hilarious.

But to Steve, it was a reminder of how close they came to losing Eddie, how close they were to his heart actually stopping, his skin going pale.

He knew it was ridiculous, so he choked out a laugh and found a way to keep busy.

Snacks were mostly prepped, drinks already on ice, decorations hung with the help of Eddie and Robin.

But he could always find something to clean, and tonight's victim was the kitchen sink. Anything to avoid seeing the fake blood dripping from Eddie's mouth and neck.

He should have known it would only work for a few minutes, Eddie being basically attached to his hip ever since they made the whole boyfriend thing official.

Eddie's arms wrapped around his waist, his hands settled on Steve's stomach.

"I vant to suck your blooooood," Eddie said in a silly accent, nipping at Steve's neck.

Any other time, Steve would giggle and let him do it, let it lead to a kiss on the lips or more.

But he couldn't erase the image of Eddie coughing up blood as he tried to hold onto Steve as he was carried out of the Upside Down. He couldn't erase the way Dustin was sobbing next to him, how Robin was trying to hold it together so that Dustin didn't sense her panic.

He knew if he turned to see Eddie now, he wouldn't see his costume, he'd see him dying.

"You okay, sweetheart? Need any help?" Eddie asked, slowly pulling away when he sensed that Steve wasn't in the mood to be silly with him.

"Fine. You can go back out there."

"I will if you tell me what's bothering you," Steve could hear the crossed arms in his tone.

"Nothing, Eds. Just want everything to be perfect for the kids."

That was true, and he knew Eddie believed that, but he also knew it wasn't everything and Eddie would absolutely know that, too.

"Is it something I did?" Eddie asked.

Steve turned to him, finally looking at him and resisting the urge to flinch.

He must not have succeeded because Eddie was pulling away quickly.

"It's just. It's the blood. I know it's fake and I know it's stupid and this is supposed to be fun and a joke, but just seeing you with blood is a lot," Steve explained, hating himself more by the second for ruining Eddie's fun.

"Stevie, why didn't you say something before? I can wash it off," Eddie turned towards the sink to do just that when Steve reached his hand out to stop him.

"No, I-"

"Stevie, I am not letting you suffer your way through trauma if I can do something to help."

Steve didn't have any response to that, so Eddie continued to run the water until it was warm, and started splashing some onto his face and scrubbing the evidence of fake blood away.

"The kids..."

"I'll just tell them some got in my mouth when I took a drink and it tasted gross and didn't wanna risk it happening again. They won't care, they're on sugar highs already."

Steve still felt stupid for letting this bother him, but when Eddie wrapped his arms around him and leaned in to kiss him softly, reassuringly, he knew it was fine.

Maybe next Halloween it would be a little easier.

[flipphone01st]

PLEASE write the mafia 141 idea you posted🥺I'm in love with the idea so much already!!!

Mafia 141/Bartender reader- Part one

Johnny🧼

Mostly Johnny/reader in this fic, because ive decided to split this up into different parts that will focus on different characters Like part 2 could focus of Gaz/reader.

Warning: not proof read, bad joke, swearing, alcohol and smoking, Johnny is a lil shit, and pushy, poorly written accents, (if I forgot anything that could have a warning let me know )

this is literally my first time actually writing a full fic so it's probably mediocre, FEEDBACK AND CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS GREATLY APPRECIATED. Other then that I hope you enjoy :)

Stupid uncle, stupid debt, stupid bar. You hated this, but you suppose its your own fault. If only you had just closed the door when your uncle showed up at your door begging for help because he had gained massive debt to one of the most infamous crime bosses in the city... Johnathan Price...if only you had just said no and didn't drive your ass down to Price's club and demand to speak with him, didn't try and bargain for your uncle...maybe then you wouldn't be forced to work for the bastard...

Two hours...thats how much longer you'd have to spend standing behind this bar. You swear to god, if other drunk yells at you you'll shove a jigger down their throat, and your 'coworkers', if you could even call them that, weren't making your life easier. If anything they were hellbent on making it worse. "Yer lookin' a bit peely wally." Johnny chuckles while cleaning a margarita glass, it was just him today, said Kyle was off doing something for Price, you didn't want to ask what.

You glance up at him, eyes narrowing in confusion and slight annoyance "..huh?"

"Means you look like shite." He clarifies.

You sigh and stand up, nudging an empty box away with your foot "thanks... asshole." You grumble. He chuckles and raises his hands in mock surrender, "Awe come on, I'm just funnin' with ya. You look fine, a wee bit red in the face, but that's it." He grins, you didn't hate him, he could actually be quite hilarious sometimes... sometimes...You roll your eyes. He laughs and takes out a cigarette, lighting it up. "Ya want one?" He offers.

"no...I thought price didn't like us smoking around the drinks.."

"Aye, he doesn't." He shrugs, taking a drag of his cigarette. "but what ol Pricey doesn't know won't kill em."

"mm.." your nose scrunches in disgust at the smell. you take a small step away, not wanting the smoke to settle on your clothes. He blows smoke out the side of his mouth, away from you "yer no fun ya know that?" You scoff, "pft..I can be fun.", while crossing your arms, and leaning back against the bar with your lips shaped into a slightly grumpy pout. "Oh?" He chuckles again, leaning back against the bar himself "can ya? Let's see, tell me a joke."

you think long and hard "uuuuuuuuuuuh..ok I got one. What do you call a fake noodle?" Johnny squints his eyes "...what?"

"....an impasta..."

"..."

"..." You're both silent, completely silent.... just staring at each other...

"..." Johnny sighs "that joke was dogshite."

Your shoulders slump forward in defeat "I know." He chuckles, "Well at least yer aware." before taking another drag of his cigarette. before looking at you with the most smug grin you've ever seen "but that also just proved my point...yer no fun, pipsqueak."

"Pipsqueak?" You raise an eyebrow as your eyes narrow

"Yeah, you heard me. Yer a wee'un." He teased, god you wanted to whip that stupid grin off his equally stupid face. "you're not even that much taller than me."

"I'm seven inches taller than you." He points out.

"...nuh uh.."

"Fuck ya mean, nuh uh?" His eyebrows furrowed as he tries not to laugh, on the other hand, your brows furrow in annoyance. "I mean, nuh uh."

Johnny chuckles, and places his hand on top of your head. He then leans down, the tip of his nose almost brushing yours "dena it alllll ya want..." His eyes were locked with yours, the faint smell of cigarette smoke almost making you recoil in disgust. he leans even closer, you try and lean back but you're stopped by the bar. "...yer still a pipsqueak!" then ruffles your hair aggressively.

You slap his hand away, glaring at him while fixing your hair. "Jerk! Don't do that again." you grumble, and to make matters even worse, you feel your cheeks heat up a bit. "Awe, someone's all hot and flustered now." He smirks, giving you a small jab with his elbow "c'mon now, I was just joking around, relax."

You groan softly and roll your eyes, pushing him away and walking to the other side of the bar, trying to find anything that you could use to ignore him. Johnny grins, quickly putting out his cigarette and following after you "see! that's exactly what I'm talking about. Such a grump...don't tell me yer so boring that ya don't even like a bit of harmless flirting?"

"go away, Johnny." You don't look up from the drink you were pouring for a costumer "Aww, c'mon. I'm just tryna lift yer spirits." He wraps his arm around your shoulder "you like me don't ya?" He grins, not expecting a positive answer.

Your eyes widen and you move out from under his arm "no." Was your immediate response, your voice stern. Johnny grins wider and moves to stand right in front of you, leaning right up and practically invading your personal space. "Don't lie to me now. I bet ya daydream about me, don't ya? About all of us? Me and the lads, hm?"

Your face goes red "what?" He grins, almost deviously "you think I haven't noticed the way ya seem to float off into lala land while staring at me or Kyle work? When Simon's gotta rough up some jackass? Or even when price is literally just in the room with ya? Don't try to dena it, pipsqueak...just can't keep us all out of yer fantasies eh?" His hands slide their way onto your hips, he didn't seem to care about the bar patrons laughing and ooing, some even getting annoyed that the two bartenders were flirting with each other instead of enabling their alcohol addiction.

Your brain felt like it was short circuiting, it had become uncomfortably warm. If you were a truther..you'd admit that despite hating these four men...they were kinda hot. But you're a god damn liar and you'll be one till the day you die! "i-i!..no..no way!.. you're crazy! There's no way in hell id ever like any of you like...that.."

"Mm...sure... I'm definitely crazy." He leans even closer, his voice a whisper as he presses his body into you, the two of you basically chest to chest "...crazy about you." He leans down to try and steal a kiss, you're eyes widen comically large but thankfully before you could even react the gruff voice of Simon makes Johnny freeze just before his lips could graze yours "That's enough, you two 'er supposed to be workin, not swapping spit." He glares at Johnny, you didn't notice it but there was a slight hint of jealousy in his dark eyes... you didn't notice, but Johnny sure as hell did.

Johnny quickly backs up from you, and then looks at Simon with a smug grin on his face "Jeez... Yer no fun either, Si. We were just messin' around." Simon stares him down, not breaking eye contact with Johnny for a good two minutes, until finally letting out a deep sigh "just keep it outside of work..." then glances at you, "Price said you're free to go for today.."

You nod "uh..thank you." You awkwardly stutter, still trying to process what just happened and understand how it made you feel... were you embarrassed? Very. Were you necessarily uncomfortable?... strangely enough...no, you weren't uncomfortable. Simon nods then walks off into his little office behind the bar, Johnny watches him go, then his gaze wanders back over to you "Sooo, ya gonna head off then?"

"yeah.." you answer, somewhat shyly. Johnny nods, a quick look of disappointment on his face before he masks it with a smile "alright, then...have a good night, pipsqueak." He shrugs playfully, and begins walking off to serve a poor bastard that had been trying to order a drink for the past five minutes. ".. you too, Johnny.." you mutter while walking out from behind the bar to towards the break room to get your stuff and finally leave....what a weird ass day...

END OF PART ONE. Please let me know what you thought

[fedorah-the-explorah]

going off of the sheer amount of fanfiction i've read saying the contrary, I think this may be considered an unpopular opinion, but I firmly believe that player is like scary good at lying. I don't think he particularly likes lying, but he can, you know? like on the rare occasion that he has to, carmen will listen to him lie straight through his teeth like it's nothing and get really really concerned. because like. hello? where did you learn to do that? sir?

I don't know, watching s2e7 is so funny to me because this is the first time he's interacted with someone outside the team for a caper, and he immediately gets into the deception, fake accent and all. no hesitation. carmen switches the plan on him, and he's the one who has to relay that to gray while still maintaining the lie. and he does it! full confidence! and when graham pushes back, player pulls out the "haha yeah the crowds going crazy :)" and gets him to go along.

and hey! this plan was fucking ludicrous and stupid. I have such a love-hate relationship with this episode. it is everything to me. it's fucking idiotic. it's beautiful. it's a god damn joke. when the plan DOES eventually fall apart, that is not on player because buddy did his best with the silliest plan known to mankind. okay? he was ON it in this episode, I love it.

it's also the screening he did during the second act of the pilot. "strange people kept answering your phone!" and you kept calling?? did you have these silly goofy little lies already made? or were you just coming up with them on the fly?

or what about in season 4 when zack and ivy come to his school posing as exterminators? they can't agree on a lie and arrive at making up a new kind of insect, and player is so quick to back it up. the embodiment of "yes, and?" kid can roll with the punches, it's great.

like, there's a reason he and carmen are best friends. she was raised to be a thief and was pretty much born for their line of work, but player is kind of perfectly made for it as well. that's a guy who can continue a bit. his confidence with this stuff is both impressive and reckless, and it has GOT to keep carmen up at night. I love him.

[asimpwithfreetime]

Mr. Steal your girl (Tsu’tey x fem!reader / Jake Sully x Neytiri)

Summary: Tsu’tey tries to make Jake mad by dating his mate (He doesn’t know that you are not Jake’s human mate but his sister)

This fic is way looooonger than I expected.

Kind of a fluffy one-shot

Warnings: none I could think of.

Let’s pretend that Tsu’tey didn’t die, okay?

Also, I wrote this at 6 am in the morning and I have to wake up at seven, this might be the longest sleep deprived rant I’ve done.

English is not my first language

[ Reader’s POV ]

Jake has been acting strange since he became an avatar user, he barely sleeps o eats. He is always with Dr. Grace talking about Na’vis and their culture. I’ve also heard him talk about a woman, Neytiri I think.

Sometimes I wish I could go have adventures with him, running around Pandora freely. Not being small enough to be eaten by almost EVERYTHING.

Once the war with the sky people, no longer our workmates, started, I chose to fight on the side of the Na’vis, even though, none of them knew me.

I got injured during the battle. My brother, in his avatar form, picked me up, biding goodbye to his mate and bringing me back to our base to let Norm patch me up. I almost didn’t notice the freezing cold gaze that fell upon me.

[ Tsu’tey’s POV ]

So the demon with a fake body already had a mate with the sky people. She looks extremely weak. And he just PICKED HER UP in such a loving and caring way!? In front of Neytiri, as if nothing was wrong.

I walked towards Neytiri, but she didn’t seem upset. Okay, I’ll need to figure this out.

[ Few days after ]

[ Y/n’ POV ]

I was almost cured enough to go outside again. Even if I needed an oxygen mask to breath outside, it felt so freeing to see Pandora.

I didn’t want to wait any longer, so when Jake and Norm were distracted, I went out, into the forest. At first, I felt lost, but soon I found my way around it. Nature was beautiful here and we had stopped its destruction.

Stepping though the forest, I found a small lake and I walked up to it to see my reflexion. Standing closely to it I could see myself, but when I looked closely I could see the tree branches. In one of them there was a Na’vi, his bow was prepared to shoot me and he didn’t seem very happy.

[ Tsu’tey’s POV ]

I thought all humans were forced to leave the other day, except for some of Jakesully’s friends. I didn’t see any human women between them. I MUST kill her.

I followed her around the forest, I tried to be as silent as possible. She looked weak. Suddenly I remembered myself thinking the exact same thing. THIS IS JAKESULLY’S MATE. He didn’t show her to us because he wanted her all for himself while still having Neytiri. That bastard!

If I killed her, Jakesully would have to tell the truth right? Or maybe he would get so mad he would go back to his stupid dying planet.

I prepared my bow, pointing the arrow directly at her. She was so relaxed here, she wouldn’t expect this. But, she was looking into a lake, I couldn’t see it properly but I knew something was up when she tensed up. She turned around looking directly at me. For a split of a second I felt bad. I looked at her, her face soft and beautiful. Wait! Did I just though this human piece of meat was beautiful?

I tensed my bow a little bit more to scare her. She pulled her hands up in the air and said “Don’t kill me please!”. I thought about it. She was so weak she didn’t seem like a problem. But she was still Jakesully’s mate.

My mind raced, maybe Jake was being unfaithful to both of them and she wasn’t the one to fault. I brought my bow down and jumped from the tree. She was so small compared to me. From up close I could she her poor body shaking while she looked at me with a pleading look en her eyes.

When we were close enough I said, trying to sound strong even though my accent was not very good. “I am not going to kill you, sky demon”. She looked at me, still doubting it. I was about to tell her to go off to her base and never come back here, but an idea crossed my mind. What if I steal Jakesully’s mate?

Mine died, then her parents promised me Neytiri, I did like her, even though she wasn’t my real mate. Then Jakesully had to come and ruin it, once again sky people broke my chances of being happy. I almost died in the fight and lost all my privileges I would get for being the clan’s chief. I was degraded just for a sky demon in a Na’vi flesh disguise.

I waited for three and a half years, Jakesully did it in one week. I looked at her when my idea seemed perfect. If a human stole my Na’vi mate, a Na’vi will steal his human mate. Perfect.

Just as I was thinking that, a woodsprite fell onto her head. Was Eywa saying that I should do it? Was Ewya giving me back what’s fair?

I smiled mischievously. The woman looked terrified.

[ Y/n’s POV ]

He was smiling at me just right after he was aiming at me with a bow and arrow. “Are you okay?”

He seemed to snap out if his trance. He pulled his bow and arrow to his side, not shooting it. “Who are you? Why are you here? You weren’t with the scientists that would stay here” his words were accusing, but his accent was adorable, I couldn’t help but giggle to myself.

“I am Y/n. Y/n Sully” his face darkened at the saying of my surname.

[ Tsu’tey’s POV ]

I knew she was his mate. Humans give each other their supernames? Subnames? Sournames? Whatever!

I knew she had to be with him.

[ 3rd Person POV ]

For the next couple of days, Tsu’tey began the Na’vi courting with Y/n. Sometimes she blushed at his advances, something that made him really proud. But other times she was oblivious to them.

Once he was close enough he kissed her, copying how Jake kissed Neytiri. Just with a smaller figure. He had taken off her mask for a second, kissing her roughly. She was red as a tomato.

Tsu’tey should admit that he began doing that to annoy Jakesully and to steal his mate as a revenge. But now he did want to steal her.

[ A month later or so ]

Tsu’tey felt nervous, he didn’t know how the mating would go as they would need help of the Tsa’hìk. He went to look for Jake. “Jake I am going to mate your human mate” he said, in English.

“Tsu’tey, brother, I think you might have messed up the sentence” Jake thought that the Na’vi had said something wrong because of the language.

He repeated the same words, now in Na’vi and Jake was as dumbfounded as before.

“Y/n, I am talking about Y/n” Tsu’tey explained. Jake started laughing. “What’s so funny? I courted her better than you could every imagine” Tsu’tey felt that laugh as a taunt to his pride.

“Y/n isn’t my mate” Jake hollered between laughs. “But she has your sourname!” Tsu’tey said.

“She is my sister!” Jake began laughing again. Tsu’tey felt his face loosing color. He looked dumbfounded. He still loved Y/n but now he felt like a fool.