#but also consider that stede

[saltpepperbeard]

I know it's tough, but...chin up!

[merricatblckwood]

Me : please can we have a cool giant ofmd billboard like in Los Angeles and New York?

My city : we have a giant ofmd billboard at home

[arsenicflame]

steddyhands modern au inspired by this post:

(1828 words, themes of kink but nothing explicit, established blackhands & gentlebeard-centric. Happy Pride!)

Stede picks up leatherworking in the wake of his divorce. He's not exactly sure how it ended up being such an important hobby for him, only that he had always admired the intricate designs on his horse's best bridles, and with little else to do with his time, he decides to give it a go.

It's rocky going at first, but he's having fun working with his hands for the first time in his life, and there's a sense of satisfaction in seeing the design come to life as he works. With practice, his skills improve, and he learns how to make things that are truly one of a kind.

He starts off posting his pieces online, as a way to reach fellow enthusiasts, but quickly finds himself with a rather large audience. Stede’s style is unique, and, after many requests from his followers, Lucius encourages him to make some more basic pieces he can sell. It's not about making money for Stede, but another way to meet new people who share his interests- as Lucius keeps telling him, it's sad that his personal assistant is the main person he talks to these days. 

So Stede sets out on a new adventure, and has quite the time designing a new range of patterns for the market. He makes purses, belts, bracelets, and, most importantly, dog collars- all still with his unique designs embossed into them, of course. He rents a booth at his towns monthly craft fair, and very quickly finds himself with a new group of friends in the other regulars- Pete, his usual neighbour, who sells an array of wooden figures he carves, Roach, who runs a stand for his bakery, and Frenchie, who isn't actually a stallholder, but is almost always busking near his friend Wee John’s stand of knitted goods, bringing life to the market even in the pouring rain. There's also Buttons, another regular at the market. Nobody is exactly sure what he does there- he doesn't sell things, or seem to buy anything either, but rain or shine, he's there with the birds.

Stede’s been doing this a few months by the time June rolls around. As he's setting up his stand, he notices that the area is much busier than it’d normally be at this time of morning. Lucius, who got roped into helping run Stede’s stall somewhere down the line (despite his protests that this is not what personal assistant means… But hey, he got a boyfriend out of it, at least), reminds him that there's the parade today, too- not realising that Stede had no clue there was a parade today, and especially not that it was pride. Stede immediately jumps to fretting about the amount of stock he’s brought, and Lucius takes the cue to escape, saying he’ll go and grab them coffee (but really, he's off to flirt with Pete)

Lucius is still missing when Ed stumbles across the little leather stall. Stede’s just ran back to his car to fetch his last boxes of inventory, and by the time he returns, Ed’s already begun to narrow down his choices. Stede greets him, starting to tell him that they're not actually open yet, but before he gets more than a couple of words out, Ed’s exclaiming “You're a Kiwi!!!”

The two of them smile at the shared recognition, and Stede says he’ll make an exception, just for Ed, and asks him what exactly he was interested in. Ed tells him that he's looking for a collar “for his boy”, and points out the particular design he was looking at. It happens to be one of Stede’s favourites from this latest run of work, a fact he mentions to Ed. It leads them into a discussion about Stede’s craft, and Ed’s Izzy, and then everything in between. Ed’s listening intently to the things Stede’s telling him, completely drawn in by the process, and by Stede himself. He watches as Stede stamps Izzy's name into the collar, and Stede even lets him have a go at one of the stamps. 

Lucius reappears sometime in the middle of this- only to immediately retreat again, seeing Stede engrossed with Ed. He sets up camp at Pete's booth opposite, watching this man flirt intensely with his boss- and Stede flirt back just as hard. Does Stede even realise he’s doing it? Lucius had known Stede was gay since before Stede even admitted it to himself, but this is on a whole other level.

The pair stand there so long that Izzy comes to look for Ed- the two of them are manning a float on the parade with their crew, and it's past time for them to get geared up. He's already worked up, frustrated to have been left to set up everything alone, when Ed had just gone to see if he could get them both coffee. So maybe he's a bit of a prick, approaching with a brash “where the fuck have you been, Edward”, to which Stede brings the same energy, giving a bitchy “Ed! Do you know this guy?” Izzy tenses, ready to snap, but then Ed cuts in, excitedly telling Stede that this is “his Izzy!” Which confuses the hell out of Stede. 

Forgetting his earlier attitude, he asks Ed if he “really named his dog after his friend”, only to be met with confusion right back from Ed at where the hell Stede got the idea he had a dog from. Stede gestures at the bag with the collar in it, to which Ed has to tell him, “oh, no, that's for him.” Ed tells Stede that they're here to run a float for their local leather society, and while Stede is certainly shocked by what Ed’s saying, he's not finding himself… uninterested. It's simply that he’s never even considered any of this before, especially not that people would use the things that he made for this, but Ed sounds so enthusiastic about it all. He tells him about how his friends would love to see Stede’s work, about how classic leather gear is always so fucking boring- but not Stede’s stuff, no, Stede’s stuff is “fresh” and “fascinating” and unlike anything Ed’s ever seen before. 

Ed's enthusiasm is incredibly infectious, so when he invites Stede to come back to see their float, he readily agrees. It’s a concept Izzy’s less than enthusiastic about. He doesn’t really want to bring this man who’s dressed like he just walked out of a HOA board meeting to their kinky little corner of the world, but he is having a lot of fun watching Stede squirm, so decides not to raise a protest. He does demand he gets his long-overdue coffee first, though (Stede pays for it- as “compensation for him distracting Ed from his job”, he says, not giving Izzy a second to process before he's tapping his card)

By the time they return to the float, Fang, Ivan & Jim are waiting for them, all already geared up. Stede is stunned silent at the sight for about 5 seconds, before he starts actually looking at the quality of Jim’s harness, and proceeds to go off about the poor quality of the craftsmanship, about how the hardware is tacky and completely the wrong choice with this leather, how his “ten year old daughter could do a better job!!!” 

There's complete silence from the group, until Izzy, of all people, bursts into laughter at Stede’s audacity (and, the fact he was staring at Jim's tits completely unabashedly, like he hadn't even noticed them in the first place). Izzy's laughter sets Ed off as he tells the group about Stede’s misunderstanding- “you didn't say he was a person!” “I mean, he's my dog”- and soon everyone's having a friendly giggle at Stede’s mistake.

It's somewhere in the middle of the retelling that Ed remembers that this whole thing happened because he was buying Izzy a gift. After a moments fumbling, he presents Izzy with the collar-  It's a rich, deep black, embossed with a rolling pattern that resembles waves. It’s made from a firm enough leather to take the tooling, and to remind Izzy that he’s owned while he’s wearing it, yet still soft enough for long term comfort. Izzy's eyes immediately lock on to it, an unreadable expression coming over his face, and Ed turns it; first so he can really see the design and Izzy’s name embossed into it, and then so he can see the small “Ed ♥” on the inside of the collar, right over his swallow tattoo. 

“I did the heart,” Ed says to him softly, intended only for Izzy’s ears. Izzy's eyes flick up to Ed’s, and he raises his chin to give Ed the room to put it on. Ed buckles the collar around his neck almost reverently, a test of the tightness turning into a caress of Izzy's neck. It's a perfect fit.

It's as though something comes over Izzy; so twitchy and abrasive earlier, now silent, staring at Ed with a look akin to worship in his eyes. He obediently tilts his head for a kiss as Ed's fingers move to his chin- It's a sight to behold, and one that has Stede intrigued. He wants to know more about this lifestyle, and these men in particular. He wants to be the one to put that expression on Izzy's face.

The moment breaks as Ed and Izzy pull apart, and Ed calls for the crew to finish the last bits of set up. Izzy shakes himself a little before running off to bark orders again, but even still, there remains a softness to him that wasn't there before. 

Ed turns back to Stede with an apologetic smile, already obvious that he has to get going. Before he can speak, however, Stede jumps in -“My business numbers on the card in the box… I'll be around all day”- Ed’s smile turns more genuine at that, promising to stop by if he gets a moment, and that he’ll send his friend's Stede’s way- “if he wants that kind of business.” Stede says that he does, actually- that he's seen a whole new world already today, and, while he was a little taken aback at first, he can feel the passion Ed and his friends have for this life. If there's one thing that's ever mattered to Stede, it's other people's enthusiasm. Maybe he doesn't completely understand yet, but he would like to try.

One year later, Stede’s back at the market on pride weekend again, far better stocked for the crowds this time around. Lucius is finally free to spend the day flirting with Fang & Pete to his heart's content, now that Stede’s roped his own boyfriends into helping him run the stall- and into modelling the merchandise. Ed loves that part, while Izzy needs a lot more convincing, but the puppy eyes Stede & Ed weaponise against him make a very good argument.

[deskgirl]

Thinking about modern AU Izzy Hands who’s kind of a known dick online. One day he starts going around curtly apologizing to people he’s argued with, sometimes going back to months’ old forum debates and video comments. It finally comes out that he got a dom who’s making him do this as part of their dynamic (Izzy having to “break bad habits” and “learn good behavior” and there’s bit of humiliation involved for sure) because they show up in a couple comment threads to publicly call him a good boy or correct him if things heat up again.

Please insert your fave ship or rare pair. Especially rare pairs.

[rosamayarts]

there is something very special about Stede's devotion to ed. He made a mistake and left him waiting last season, but he won't make that mistake again. Stede has seen Blackbeard, the ruthless killer, and still loves him. Finds him impressive, even. He has seen Ed at what Ed himself would consider to be his lowest; crying in the bathtub, traumatised, and admitting to not being a good person. Even admitting to having plotted to kill Stede. And Stede chose that moment to tell him that they are friends, that he cares about him. Stede has seen Ed at his worst, on both sides of the pendulum. He has seen Ed at his most terrifying and his most vulnerable, and continues to love him sgvshvfsejfbw their story is peak romance istg

[raulsparza]

there's something about Izzy telling Lucius that his leg is gone because a shark bit him but then turning around and talking to Stede about how Ed shot him because he confessed his love

[ladyluscinia]

I don't disagree that fandom ran further with the concept of fuckeries, but I would say that 1x04 is an important spiritual successor to the concept that felt like it was going to be significant. The first demonstration we got of how good Ed and Stede could be together was the lighthouse escape, which I would definitely count as a fuckery. It's a clever, creative victory that doesn't require violence, and it seemed to sate Ed's s1 stated appetite for drama/excitement/fun without triggering him.

Continuing from here... I mean I personally agree with you, but that's also mainly what I was talking about with fandom giving the idea more importance and interest than canon did.

I think a lot of people - myself included - drew that connection from 1x04's proto-fuckery to getting a name for it (and its potential role as a raid alternative) in 1x06 to Stede becoming a true student in 1x10. More detailed examples went for looping in 1x02 and/or 1x05 to show Stede leaning toward trickery over force.

The point isn't that the fandom (basically all of us, not a few outliers) was wrong to run with this - I think it was brilliant, actually, and a big part of why I even cared about writing meta about the pirate society of a romcom - but that the canon of S2 didn't pick the idea back up at all in a way that indicates it was never going anywhere. The pattern we spotted in S1 was apparently not the interesting comedic alternate to action/adventure swashbuckling, but something (significantly more boring tbh) that served to buoy our underdog Stede along without dying until he was far enough in his pirate journey to swing a sword successfully.

Is the lighthouse escape the first demonstration in a larger pattern of how Ed and Stede will work together in the future? Where their mutual tendencies toward creative solutions and dissatisfaction with abusive and violent pirate culture can find a new, more fun way of life?

Or is it a, yes, clever and creative escape they come up with together, but one that only has those specific traits because they are in an impossible situation where they can't fight their way out - narratively because the ship is stranded and crewed by useless pirates, and meta-narratively because they need Stede to contribute as an equal instead of just getting rescued (that was for last episode) and he can't do that in a fight yet?

We thought that the lighthouse plan was supposed to connect to 1x06 and 1x10, but I think it might have only been meant to serve as a fix to Ed's fog and full moon plan (i.e. making an impossible escape).

They just looked similar because all the various wins and conflicts of S1 were shaped around Stede's character journey, but the part of that journey where he can't jump into the fray and kill the mooks too as a real pirate ended with 1x10. Which is why they don't come up with a brilliant way to slip out of the Republic without a fight in 2x08. Stede doesn't need the genre crutch anymore. He is a swashbuckling hero now, and he and Ed can kill people side by side.

You know, once the trauma-based reasons they might not do so are healed by "something something... love maybe?"

[amphibious-thing]

Highly recommend every OFMD fan read Pretty Gentleman by Peter McNeil before they open their mouth about the connection (or lack of connection as they inaccurately claim) between fashion and effeminacy in the 18th century

[sidewalk-scrawls]

This isn't a statement about the scene as a whole, just specifically the moment of Stede appearing as a merman! (I'm also intentionally leaving out an "other" option so that people are required to choose one – Please just pick whichever feels most accurate to you, even if you think it's a mixture!)

[neverbelessthan]

I just read someone’s hot take on ‘the mermaid scene’ being ‘peak cringe’ and I just-

Sweet, sweet human. That’s Ed’s psyche you’re taking about. My dude is having his life flash before his eyes in the most beautiful little heartbreaking s1 montage, and if that’s how he wants to picture Stede coming to redeem his lonely fucking soul - as a glittery goddamn tits-out merman, then that’s HIS GODDAMN BUSINESS.

[locksnek]

Token OFMD post

I was fortunate to miss the big trauma. I knew nothing about OFMD fandom until after S02 was over, even though S01 was my comfort show for most of 2023. But it's weird af seeing content from a show you love but also hate on your dash. Like, usually it's good and sweet to see, but sometimes you get a post that just results in a massive blocklist.

[sketchy-scribs-n-doods]

having soooo many thoughts about a potential steddyhands 1001 nights ofmd au where stede is a merman...

[marsixm]

big spoiler cw for the finale- i understand why a lot of people didnt feel like it made sense for how ed was acting during izzy’s death scene, like it didn’t feel earned or whatever bc they’d been at odds w each other since last season, but for me, and understand i’m not saying my personal experience making it make sense for me is trying to give undue writing cred or whatever, but i had a very difficult relationship with my very transphobic/bigoted mother. she made my life a nightmare a lot of the time. but i had to care for her in death. i had to watch her die for months. it was a waking nightmare, and it had a profound effect on me. it was complicated. it made my relationship to my memory of her very complicated. (and even if it hadnt been a months long ordeal i was caught in the middle of i’d probably still feel similarly) and that’s how ed dealing with izzy’s death feels to me. just like him having to kill his father, it was the right thing to do, but it still left him with difficult emotions. when ed says “you’re the only family i’ve got left” to izzy, after all the bullshit they put each other through, i get it.

[chocolatepot]

I just. I am so tired of the anti/proship thing. When can we all recognize that these categories are stupid and that half of the people who label themselves proship don't actually think you should be able to ship whatever you like and half the people who are antis (at a MINIMUM) have ships that violate their own principles.

[laceratedlamiaceae]

geneuinely a hate crime to give Stede better taste than Ed. Stede would not appreciate ABBA because he hates women too much and thinks Money, Money, Money is a personal attack on him.

I maintain that Stede has better taste than Ed (although I might be biased because I love to talk shit about Ed), however "Stede would not appreciate ABBA because he hates women too much" is the funniest thing I've ever received in my inbox

[hiimcanadia]

Okay I've given Ed his fair share of stuffed animals, it's Stede's turn. He gets Harper Kiwi by Jellycat because I think I'm funny