#but also I don’t wanna get into the whole „his PR team sucks’’ bit

[neutron-stars-collision]

Btw this is a safe space for people who are pissed off that Luke was omitted by the SAG nominations.

I’m disappointed but not surprised. Unfortunately.

[purplesurveys]

1252

A - Appearance.

What are you wearing? I have a gray turtleneck and brown shorts at the moment.

What are on your feet right now? I never wear anything for my feet when I’m at home.

What color are your fingernails? I say this a lot on surveys but mine are never painted. Nothing against them, I’ve just never felt the need to spend on something like my nails.

What does your hair look like right now? I have apple hair at the moment to temporarily get rid of my bangs, which I am more than sick of at this point.

B - Best Friend

Who is your best friend? Angela and Andi.

What was the last thing you two did together? The last time I saw Angela we went to the BTS pop-up store. I haven’t seen Andi since January, but when we hung out that evening we just had Korean barbecue and we also parked somewhere in UP to just talk about life in my car. My breakup had been fresh at the time and back then I just needed someone to whom I could vent.

What is (s)he doing right now? I’m sure Andi’s doing something with Leigh, maybe having a video call or something since I think they tend to have one every evening. I’m not sure what Angela’s up to but considering her replies have been a bit slow tonight, I guess she’s somewhat busy at home.

Are you talking to her/him online right now? Angela just replied to something I sent her around 15 minutes ago but the exchange wasn’t meant to be a full-blown conversation, if that’s what you mean.

C - Crush.

Who is (s)he? Eh, I don’t have a crush these days; too obsessed with work to figure out what I find attractive lmaooooo. I do have a main celebrity crush and I might just cite them instead so that I can at least fill this section out. 

What does (s)he look like? Curly hair; mismatched eyes; moles underneath his right eye, on his nose, and on his lower lip, and the widest smile I’ve seen on any person.

What was the last thing you two talked about? He’s a celebrity crush...

Does (s)he make you smile? Yes.

D - Dad

What’s your dad’s name? Edgardo.

What does he do for a living? He’s an executive chef for a luxury liner company. He hasn’t worked in a year and a half due to the pandemic and has stayed in the country this whole time, but we’ve *very* recently been informed that he can go back abroad in around two weeks! Of course it will suck letting go of him again after having him back for such a long time, but I’m just glad the family can finally be on track again, financially speaking. It had been something I’ve been worrying silently about.

What was the last thing you two did together? Had dinner last night, but we did that with the whole family too. We don’t really do things that’s just the two of us.

Do you get along better with him than your mother? Yes.

E - Ebay.

Have you ever bought anything from ebay? No. I’m not sure we have eBay here anyway.

Do you just shop around when you’re online? I don’t really shop ‘around.’ I usually have an idea of what I want to get myself, and it’s just a matter of finding the right shop from which to buy.

Do you know anybody who is addicted to it? I know a couple of co-workers who love shopping, like Gabi.

Have you ever sold anything on it? I’ve never tried selling, but I’m actually in the middle of doing something for the very first time – I’ve decided to get into trading! I got my BTS Butter album yesterday but didn’t get to pull the photocard I was vying for – the pull I got, though, was of the most popular member, which means it would be a very easy trade. I put the trade offer up the other day and I finally got a match yesterday.

F - Facebook.

When was the last time you logged on? Like five minutes ago. I constantly check it.

How many friends do you have? Just checked and it says I have 686. I wanna get rid like half of them though.

Do you hate when your facebook chat messes up? Hmm, that doesn’t really happen.

Who was the last person to leave you a wall post? Angela.

G - Google.

Do you Google everything? Yeah, I think I look up a random item or phrase at least once a day. Doesn’t hurt to learn a new thing each day. :)

What was the last thing you Googled? The K-Pop group g.o.d., since my teacher mentioned them in our Korean lessons earlier.

Would you ever trade Google in for Bing? No, I haven’t used Bing in like 12 years.

What do you Google the most? Synonyms, I think, since I’m constantly writing for work.

H - Hair.

Do you like your hair? It’s a love-hate relationship most days because I hate how thick and frizzy it can be...but I recently had mine trimmed all the way up to my neck and for some reason it’s taken on a wavy form, which I didn’t expect to come out at all. And I’ve found that it actually suits me quite a bit, so I’m enjoying my hair for now.

What color is your hair? Black.

What does it look like right now? Slightly damp since I took a shower not too long ago.

What kind of shampoo for you use? Just a normal Dove one.

I - Ibuprofen 

When was the last time you took ibuprofen? I don’t think I’ve ever taken it? I usually take paracetamol...idrk the difference either. Do you rely on it for everything (cramps, headache)? I only ever take medicine for headaches/migraines.

Are you so thankful people made it? I mean sure, I’m glad there are those who have been able to create products that can instantly relieve pain or discomfort, but I’m not obsessively grateful.

Do you have any right now? I don’t think we have any.

J - Jobs.

Do you need a job? Nah, I already have one.

Where do you work? Media/PR industry.

Where would you work? I wouldn’t change jobs/industries. This is where I wanted to end up in, and I’m really really glad and fortunate to have landed here on my first shot, right out of college, and during a pendemic.

How much money would you like to get paid? An additional P5k (~$100) would probably be more satisfying, but considering my parents aren’t the traditional Filipino parents who suck 100% of my earnings right out of me the second payday comes, I’m able to enjoy a substantial chunk of money to myself, give them a portion of my earnings, and still be able to save.

K - Kissing.

Who was the last person you kissed? That would be my ex.

Will you next kiss be a mistake? I have no idea when that would be and with whom it will be shared, so I won’t be able to give you a definite answer.

Do you kiss someone everyday? Other than my dogs, nah.

Who was your first kiss? The aforementioned ex.

L - Love.

Who do you love the most in your life? My best friends. I’m also doing a whole lot better in the self-love department these days, so that too :)

Have you ever been in love before? Yeah.

Does it make you so happy when you feel the feeling of love? Sure. It feels light and comfortable, especially when it’s shared.

Why is this word so hard to describe? Because everyone feels love differently. < There we go.

M - Mom.

What is your mom’s name? Abigail.

What is she doing right now? She was watching The Good Doctor the last time I checked on her like five minutes ago. It’s her latest obsession.

Where does she work? She works in the food and beverage department of a 5-star hotel in the city.

Do you two shop together a lot? I rarely do my shopping with either of my parents.

N - Netflix.

Do you have Netflix? Technically, I guess. My dad pays for it and we have a family account.

If not, what movies would you order? I don’t think I’ve ever ordered a movie before. Before streaming on Netflix, I just used to get illegal torrents lol.

Do you rent a lot of movies? I’ve never rented a movie. Was too young for it, I think.

Do you have the tool where it just downloads to your tv? No.

O - Ohio.

Is this the state in which you live in? I don’t even live in the US. Never been there either. < Same.

Is Ohio State your favorite football team? I don’t like football.

Did you know Ohio Is For Lovers? I’m not familiar.

Have you ever been to Ohio? See first answer in this section.

Q - Quitting.

What was the last thing you quit doing? Practicing on Duolingo. I had an extremely short period of using the app again a couple of months ago, but I lasted all of two days hahaha I had been trying to get back on learning Korean, but I enrolled in official lessons not long after that anyway so it didn’t make sense to continue the stages in the app.

Do you need to quit talking to someone right now? Nope. The people I’m talking to right now in between this survey are all welcome conversations.

Would you ever quit school? That wasn’t an option for me and I never would’ve done it anyway. 

Don’t you think quitting is stupid? No. Sometimes it can be the strongest thing you can do for yourself.

R - Reading.

What was the last book you read? Does my Korean lesson textbook count hahaha...if not, I haven’t really read anything in years.

Do you own a lot of books? I do, but they are all books from my childhood and teenage years. It’s been a while since I last updated my bookshelf.

Do you have a library card? No, haven’t had one since Grade 1.

Have you ever read a book that changed your life? Without Seeing the Dawn was pretty influential to me, but I dunno about ‘life-changing.’ I need to read more to find the book that would have that effect on me.

S - Safety.

Do you always wear your seat belt? I do these days. I didn’t really practice it when I used to drive to school, whoops. Always forgot to do it.

When riding a four-wheeler do you wear a helmet? I rarely get to do that.

Did you ever wear knee pads and a helmet when riding your bike? Nah. I can’t ride a bike either. Do you always think safety first? In COVID terms, yeah. I have a face mask and shield on as soon as I find myself outdoors.

T - Talk

Who was the last person you talked to? Reena. Who are you talking to right now? Nobody. It’s just me, this survey, and some music in the background.

Who did you last talk to before you went to bed last night? Angela and Reena, if I’m not mistaken.

Do you need to talk to anybody right now? No, I’m good.

U - US ARMY

Do you support it? I don’t know enough about it to have a bold opinion, considering I’m not even from the US and it’s been a while since their army has had any strong contact with my country.

Do you know anybody who is in the army right now? I think one of Angela’s uncles has a high position in our national army.

Don’t you ever wonder why their camo doesn’t match anything? Not really.

Would you ever go to the army? No.

V - Virgin.

Are you a virgin? Nope.

When did you lose your virginity? I was 18.

Do you wish you would’ve waited? Nah, it felt right when I did it the first time; and I maintain that stance now even though I’m no longer with that person.

Do you think you could have stayed a virgin until marriage? I could. Sex isn’t a big deal to me.

W - What.

What are you doing right now besides this survey? I’m also listening to mono. and taking bites from my doughnut every now and then.

What are you craving? Spicy tuna salad, but it can wait. Andi got me my favorite truffle baked macaroni because it’s CM Punk day today :D :D and that’s able to satisfy my savory cravings for now.

What do you need to buy? Shelves.

Why are you taking my survey? I’ve mentioned this before but I like categorized/themed surveys, so alphabetical ones are always fun for me.

X -Xanax 

Do you know anybody who is addicted to Xanax? I don’t think so.

Have you ever taken it before? No.

Do you even know what it is? No, actually.

Have you ever suffered from anxiety or depression? I’m sure I have.

Y - Yourself.

Name. Robyn.

Age. 23.

Do you smile a lot? Sure, I’d say that’s common these days.

Z - Zebra.

Are you addicted to zebra striped? Not really.

Do you own anything zebra striped? Nah. I have some stuff that come in black and white stripes, but not zebra print. Is anything on any of your websites zebra striped? No.

[cosmicmoved]

A  VERY  DESCRIPTIVE  PROFILE  OF  YOUR  MUSE.   repost with the information of your muse,  including headcanons,  etc.  if you fail to achieve some of the facts,  add some other of your own !

NAME.    Tomoaki Katsumura (otherwise known as; tomo katsumura) NICKNAME(S).   Strictly speaking, Tomo is a nickname ALIAS(ES).   N / A AGE.    25 SPECIES.    Human GENDER.   Cis male, he/him ORIENTATION.  Bisexual; only really out in public bc his pr team suck. Probably very out in private bc he’s a bit of a shagger (not a judgement). INTERESTS.  Film (both as someone who enjoys the medium and as an actor), acting, fashion, partying, doing dumb reckless shit because it’s funny....also, despite owning a sizeable Tamagotchi collection, he’s not actually that interested in the Tamagotchi franchise itself. He justs thinks they’re cute and likes owning a shit ton of them bc I guess he has too much money?? PROFESSION.   Film actor (emphasis on film; might do tv sometimes but really prefers not to), occasional model. BODY TYPE.   Skinny, a little toned but still just quite thin overall. Ectomorph. Any tone comes from being quite active anyway but he refuses to dedicate himself to proper workouts as he finds that whole realm of things boring. If a role demands he work on this, he’ll pass on it. You get Tomo as he is or you get fuck all. EYES.    Dark brown. Has been known to wear coloured lens for The Aesthetic but that’s about it. HAIR.   The colour changes a lot; he likes a bright, vibrant red but he also keeps his hair darker a lot for the sake of work. He’s not often encouraged to dye his hair alternative colours for roles. The exact style varies too, sometimes there’s an undercut and sometimes he lets it grow out, but it’s usually on the slightly longer side (but the length varies too bc he can’t stick with anything for too long) and stylistically shaggy. He tries to take very good care of his hair despite dying it a lot. SKIN.    He’s rich and famous so, to nobody’s surprise I’m sure, he has the money and connections to keep his skin in good condition. Rarely a blemish, soft and well-hydrated! Average medium skin tone. FACE.    I don’t know how to describe face shapes so I’m not going to try <3 High cheekbones, defined jawline, uhhh can you tell idk what I’m talking about,,,,, HEIGHT.  176cm / 5′9″ COMPANIONS.  His friends <33 also any director that encourages him to do his own thing bc he loves that actually ANTAGONISTS.      His own PR team LMAO....anybody who limits him unfairly, I guess? He doesn’t like being held back, especially if it’s people want him to conform to some kind of ideal. He’s also had several co-stars he hasn’t loved; he’s befriended more musicians than he has actors. COLORS.    Bright and vibrant colours. Deep reds, strong purples, bright blue and cyan. Anything with a strong kind of neon and argon vibe to it. For clothes, however, he wears a lot of blacks and whites. Colour is usually just a highlight point. FRUITS.   Probably anything with a bit of tang. Oranges but only when they’re actually nice and fresh. Strawberries are nice too but the same thing applies. For flavours (i.e; sweets and stuff), he’s partial to a lil green apple and green grape. DRINKS.  Iced coffees are a popular one. Don’t think he should have the caffeine but it’s whatever. Likes most sodas probably. Has no preference between Coke and Pepsi but sometimes drinks Pepsi on purpose to piss off his friend who has much stronger feelings about it. ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES?   Yes, absolutely. BUT!! I don’t drink so I don’t know enough about this topic to actually give a smart and accurate answer (incl. examples of drinks) that I could confidently say sums up the Tomo Experience. But Tomo does drink when he’s partying. I don’t know if he’s actually picky about drinks but he thinks stuff like beer, whisky and so on are for people with no taste. SMOKES?   I think I decided he did at some point. Maybe he’d vape /: DRUGS?  Very casually, and he only sticks to stimulants and party drugs, but he does do them. Again, mostly at parties. The real Young, Troubled and Famous experience. DRIVERS LICENSE?   Yes, and he owns a car / is a decent enough driver but mostly only out of spite bc of that whole thing where he deliberately drove his car into a tree. He didn’t like that he had a reputation for being a bad driver but, if it weren’t for that, he would have probably driven into a tree by mistake at some point.

TAGGED  BY  :    @lovedfor​ (thank youuuu!!) TAGGING  :    first of all? ME. bc i wanna do this for karam too. but also literally anybody who sees this. if you see this and you wanna do it, feel free to say i tagged you so i can read your post and be nosy (:<

[feistypaants-archived]

Between The Pipes [Chapter 21]

Rating: M Words: 1946 Pairing: Kristanna Summary: When a new owner takes over the Arendelle Ice Breakers, Kristoff isn’t sure about his future with the team. That is, until a PR nightmare throws the newest member of the media team, who also just so happens to be the daughter of the new owner, right into his arms. Kristoff and Anna can’t even stand the interviews they have to do together… how on earth are they going to fix this mess? Hockey!AU.

[Chapter Index]

Where To Read: [AO3]

Notes: This chapter is smut, mostly. There are some feelings at the end, though :^)

Also didn’t really read over this bc I’m sick of looking @ it lmao !! Sorry for any mistakes. 

Enjoy!

Anna never said she had self control. So when Kristoff asked if she wanted to take one or both cars back to his house, she pretty immediately suggested they drive together in his truck. 

She waited patiently while he showered and gathered up his gear before emerging from the locker room, hair still damp and cheeks flushed, and she waited patiently while he gathered up his things and spoke with Mattias about the next game. But her patience was wearing thin as he fumbled for his keys in his duffel as she bounced on her toes, absolutely ready to be in the truck. 

“And men say women have bags too large,” Anna snickered as she pulled a hair tie off of her wrist and spun it between her fingers for a moment. “Why would you put your keys in there?”

“You wanna drive?” He mumbled, placing his bag on top of the hood as he dug deeper, frustration clearly etching into his features. He didn’t notice Anna pull the band between her teeth before gathering her hair up into a large messy bun on top of her head. 

“No,” she hummed, tying it off, and dropping her hands back behind her, clasping them together as innocently as she could. 

“Then stop — a-ha! found them!” He pulled them out of the back triumphantly, a grin wide on his face. But he paused for a second, tilting his head slightly to the side. “You put your hair up.”

Scrunching her lips to the side, Anna averted her gaze for just a moment. “I did.”

“Looks nice.” Then he shrugged and unlocked the truck, smiling as Anna scrambled into it while he threw his equipment into the bed.

She took a quick moment to undo the top few buttons of her blouse, pinch at her lips before running her tongue over them, hoping to make her mouth look more plush, and then sat up straight as Kristoff opened his door and climbed in, narrowing his eyes at her suspiciously. “... You’re up to something, aren’t you?”

Anna pulled her bottom lip up between her teeth and smiled, rolling her eyes. “Of course not.” But then she leaned across the seats, sliding her fingers through his hair and kissed him, deep and slow, tongue teasing him as he reached out to touch her. His hands were eager, one resting on her neck as the other reached to touch at the swell of her breast, newly exposed by her lowered neckline, and Anna sighed with content as he let out a small moan when she pulled away. 

Her mouth found his throat, pressing two hot kisses against it before she dropped her hand to his thigh, fingertips brushing against his hardening cock. Anna lifted up slightly, her lips feather light against his as she whispered “Just drive.”

The height of his truck gave her confidence, knowing that it was unlikely anyone would see them. She leaned back as Kristoff started the truck, smirking at the sight of his shorts tenting in his lap. She turned herself to a more comfortable position in the truck, leaned forward, and started rubbing him through the fabric.

A happy sigh escaped her lips as she pulled the waistband over him, revealing exactly what she had been looking for. “God, I’m so lucky you have this,” she laughed, tongue darting out over her lips before she reached out to stroke him once, slowly, agonizingly slowly. “Best dick I’ve ever sucked.”

“Jesus Christ, Anna…” his voice was tense and she glanced up to see his jaw working and his knuckles white from his grip on the steering wheel. “Please.”

Well, since he said please…

Her soft tongue teased him, a small circle around the tip as she savored the taste of him. Then a bigger one, a long lick up the entire length of him, and then she lowered herself slowly, her lips circling the girth of him as she took as much of him as she could. A string of curses were whispered above her head, as his right hand dug fingers into her scalp. 

Anna wanted this to last, wanted to make sure he was practically begging for release by the time they got to his house, and wanted him to be more satisfied than ever. So she took her time, teasing, bobbing slowly, lifting her mouth off of him and giving gentle strokes with her fingers. The drive to his house wasn’t long, but the grip of his hand in her hair tightening told her he was sick of her teasing. 

“We — we’re…” his speech was broken as she sucked him, sliding up and down the length of him with ease. “A...almost there, Anna…”

Perfect.

She sped up her ministrations, hollowing her cheeks as she slid up to his head, teasing with her tongue at the slit of him, running the flat side of it back down his length as she worked her way downwards. 

“Fuck, Jesus…” 

That was a good sign, and she sound of him pulling off the road, pressing a clicker to open what sounded like gates, before stopping the car and squeezing his fingers tightly against his skull was even better. 

“We’re here... I’m—” 

He groaned when she nodded, sucking hard and faster, one hand embracing the bit of him she couldn’t reach with her lips as her other cupped his sac, playing gently with his sensitive skin. And then his fingers were drumming hard against the steering wheel, his hips thrusting slightly up into her mouth, and he tried so hard to give her the option of not taking his release on her tongue, but Anna stayed where she was, encouraging as ever.

And he came, his hot cum spilling over her tongue, Anna swallowing it with as much enthusiasm as she had during everything. She sucked him through his orgasm, cleaning off any remainder of mess left on his skin. And when she rose back up, wiping off the tiny bit of him she felt on the corner of her lips, Kristoff reached across the truck, practically pulling her into his lap as he kissed her, hard and wild, breathless as ever.

“What was that for?” He was panting, breathless and flushed as he pulled back and let his eyes dance across her face.

Anna smiled, running a palm down his now scratchy cheek. “It was… an appetizer.”

He groaned and laughed, his head dropping back against the headrest behind him. “Well… then you’ll have to be dessert.”

—

“So,” Anna hummed, leaning over the table and reaching for his hand. “You’re talented, funny, hot, kind, great with kids, fucking amazing at sex, and you can cook?” She rolled her eyes and propped her chin in her hand. “What can’t you do?”

Kristoff’s cheeks flushed but he laughed her off, letting go of her hand as he moved to clear off the table. “Ah, don’t think too highly of me, seriously.” 

She leaned back in her chair with a grin. “Why not? You’re the whole package. What a shame you’re not willing to settle down.”

The way his back tensed told her she had said the wrong thing and she stood quickly. “No, I, um.” Anna fumbled to grab the rest of the dishes and came up beside him at the sink. “I didn’t mean… I just… you really are an ideal guy, Kris.” And she would give anything for him to settle down with her... “But I… I’m not saying —“

He sighed and reached over to grab the glasses from her hands. “I know…”

Anna bit at her lip before wrapping her arms around his bicep and rubbing a gentle hand against his shirt. “Do… you want to watch something?” She grinned up at him and shrugged. “Or … not watch something.”

His laughter eased her worries, and he touched gently at her hand on his arm. “Anna… are you sure you’re still…” he paused, turned to face her, and placed his hands on her shoulders. “You’re still okay with this, right? This arrangement? Because if you’re not —“

“I am!” Her cheeks darkened as she answered far too quickly. “I am. Are you?”

“Yes.”

She threw her arms around his neck and pulled him down to her, sliding her lips over his. “Good,” she mumbled, giggling when his arms circled around her waist and lifted her up onto the counter, settling her knees on either side of his hips. 

His mouth trailed across her skin, settling for far too little time behind her ear before he found her throat, kissing and sucking at the fragile skin there. Anna could feel the mark he was leaving, knew he was being too rough on her, but didn’t care in the slightest as his hands trailed down her waist, her hips, her thighs, sneaking up under the hem of her skirt. When his fingers reached her center, brushing lightly over her damp panties, Anna sighed. 

Kristoff only smirked as he got down on his knees. He kissed his way up her thighs, now bruising intentionally as she swung her legs over his shoulders, using his body as leverage to push her bottom off the countertop when he moved to pull her panties down. “Should we… go to the bedroom?”

He shook his head, nipping the skin right beside her core. “I prefer to eat in the kitchen.” 

Then he dove in, feasting on her as if he had been starving. 

Anna saw stars for the first time in her life.

—

They sat together on his couch, Anna curled up against his side as he ran his thumb gently up and down her shoulder. After bringing her to her climax twice with his mouth, all she had wanted to do was relax and rest for a little while. Kristoff had smiled and said of course, wiping at the remnants of her on his chin, before kissing her softly and carrying her to the other room.

An hour was spent watching whatever he happened to flip to, as they both wound down from their busy day. But it was getting late, and Anna really didn’t feel like driving home, and she let herself dare to wonder if…

“It’s getting late,” she hummed, turning her head on his shoulder to look up at his face. “So…”

He smiled, nodding. “You want me to drive you home or back to the rink to get your car?”

Oh.

She tried to ignore the ache in her chest. He had never stayed at her apartment, and she shouldn’t have been surprised at this response, but she still lost her breath for just a moment. Anna had almost thought that he was inviting her to his home for a reason. But she had to remind herself that… it really wasn’t real, then.

She had said she was still all right with this arrangement. And she was…

Mostly.

“Oh. I guess…” she sat up, letting go of him, and moved to stand. “I guess I need my car. So…”

“Yeah,” he stood as well, heading to the doorway to grab his shoes. “No problem.”

“I just need to pee, first.” He nodded and went to the kitchen to start on some dishes as she headed back to the bathroom. She wasn’t going to cry about this. She definitely wasn’t. 

And when she braced her hands on the bathroom sink and stared at herself in the mirror, willing the tiny shine of tears in her eyes to go away, she almost made it happen.

She knew what she signed up for, and she knew that she could handle it. 

But one moment of weakness was okay, right?

[jbbuckybarnes]

PR Stunt

Desc: Fake Dating AU. Celebrity AU. After pity posts for Sebastian skyrocketing, you two being seen together as friends a lot and with a big movie coming up, his management decides to pair you two for a PR stunt. You both agree, pranking the public seems fun and getting rid of pity tweets seems convenient. Pairing: Sebastian x Reader Warning: It’s not that good and one of my last real people fiction pieces I have left. Not beta read.

M A S T E R L I S T

+Pop Magazine - Articles: +Hot actors that are still on the market!+

*@lancebastian: Someone give this man a family!* *@stanfanfam: I feel so bad for him, he still isn’t with a woman or trying to build a family.* *@aliburger: Poor boy looks so alone. I’m volunteering!* _______ +Pop Magazine - Candids: +Sebastian Stan seen with his friend Y/N Y/LN in Manhattan, New York+

*@seabassbaby: I know they’re just friends but they’d make a cute couple.* *@lancebastian: Get her, Stan!* *@vanillaiceice: She’s cute af.* ________ “People are pitying you so much, it’s insane. What is so wrong with being single at your age?” you looked up from your phone at Sebastian sitting on the other side of the couch. “They’re just projecting their desires onto this.” he shrugged without looking up from his phone. “How does that not annoy you to some degree? I read it and get irritated by it.” you chuckled. “Sometimes I do, but at the end of the day it’s so unimportant.” now he looked up. “Yeah, but doesn’t that suck energy out of you to some level?” you two never talked about this specifically. “A bit.” another shrug with a small pout. “Well, let’s stop talking about that then. When’s press coming up?” you tried to change the topic. He looked at you for a second with a confused face before answering, “I think in two weeks.” “No, brunch meetings for weeks again.” you pouted like a child and got a smile back from him. “Poor baby.” he played into it and laughed. “You know they keep me sane.” you answered chuckling. “I know. I promise we’ll eat like three pizzas in one day when I’m back again, chaotic mess.” you looked at him offended. “I’m just telling the truth.” he held his arms up and grinned. “Ar-” you were interrupted by someone calling him and went back to checking your socials. You had a decent following and were friends with a few photographers, which gave you the opportunity to try yourself as a model and influencer. One of you photography friends is also how you two met and as soon as you two found your love for New York brunch meetings the friendship was sealed. “With Y/N?” you looked up at the mention of your name and saw him raise a brow. “Okay, yeah. Good, tomorrow at 11am. See ya.” he ended the call and finally saw your confused face. “Guess we have a meeting at 11am tomorrow and they also want you there.” his hand went through his hair and he exhaled a bit exhausted. “Why that?” you weren’t with his management or something. “She didn’t tell me. Maybe they want to sign you?” he was just as clueless as you and sat back down on the couch and you sat up. “That would be...sudden?” you said even more confused. “I feel like there’s something more to that.” his eyes narrowed. You shrugged taking your phone again, “We’ll find out I guess.”

___________ “We know you both don’t like paparazzi but this could benefit all of us and would be over after a few weeks.” the woman ended her little idea. “Wait, you want us to do a PR stunt, did I understand that right?” you said it out loud. A serious nod came back and a sigh from you. “Can’t believe I’m saying this but I think that would be hilarious outside of the paparazzi stuff.” he snorted beside you. “Excuse me, what?” you turned towards him and got a shrug back. “So...would you be on board?” the lady asked again. You let your head sink onto your arms on the table with an, “I guess.” You both left the office after you got handed a contract to go through to sign with the management and the comment, “I hate being friends with you.” “Did you mean being in a relationship?” he joked and got a stern look back. “Don’t take it too far, Stan!” you warned him. “Won’t. Promise.” he said with that boyish smile that guaranteed for nothing. “Idiot.” you muttered while walking out of the building onto the busy street. A hand was reaching for yours and you looked up confused. “What? Need to lay down the foundation for what’s about to go down.” he clearly loved the idea to mess around with you and the public for a while. “Dork.” a smile finally found its way onto your face and you shook your head. You didn’t mind holding hands with your other friends, so this wasn’t the problem. You weren’t so sure about the rest of what was about to happen in the upcoming weeks. “You love it.” he said nudging you lightly.

“Only if I get some good pictures for my Instagram and Twitter.” you chuckled. “I’m sure there’s gonna be some of your beloved photoshootings.” he grinned. “You’re gonna be an Instagram boyfriend, don’t you forget about that part of it.” you grinned back. “Oh god.” he had the realization hit him. “Yeah, didn’t think through that I might get back at you, huh?” you laughed.

“Lunch date?” he looked down at you after you both were finished with laughing and had walked for a block. “As long as I don’t need to play honeymoon phase love, yeah.” you bit your lip to stop the laugh that was making its way through your body. “Don’t worry, I think the eating each other alive part is one or two weeks in.” he wheezed and held the door to one of your favorite places open. “It’s gonna be hella obvious that it’s a stunt.” you pointed out. “That’s why I agreed. Why not have some fun and confuse people for a bit.” there was that boyish smile again. “Like that whole Shawn Mendes & Camila Cabello thing.” you shuddered. That was obviously a stunt but there was that part where everyone kinda thought it might be true and they just wanted to get the extra publicity. “I have no idea what you’re talking about but I guess my answer would be yes.” he said before turning to the waitress that just arrived at your table. ___________ +Pop Magazine - Candids: Sebastian Stan seen having a lunch date and holding hands with Y/N Y/L/N*+ *@bellastann: I feel like our dreams start to manifest stanfam!* *@lancebastian: Not entirely sold, holding hands ain’t that special. They are friends for months now.* *@evanstackiee: Yeees! (Y/L/N)stan is real!!!* ____________ Your contract was signed, your game plan was well organized. There were appointments and activities planned out, what to do at which one and the paparazzi would be there for some of them. You kinda cringed when you looked at the little calendar in front of you but you also were about to have some fun with tricking the general public. “Just an insanely big acting exercise, right?” you looked beside you to see him read through the stuff too. “Uuh, yeah.” he said concentrated on reading. You were both extremely open with each other and rarely had any miscommunication. So kissing in public without starting friendship problems wouldn’t be so hard, but you still had a weird feeling about it. Not fear, just a feeling.

__________ The first thing you did was pretty mellow. Attending a small local event together. You did things like this before but this time you’d have to cuddle up a bit here and there and make a few Instagram Stories. “You comfortable?” he smiled down at you holding your body close to his arm. “You’re 6 foot and fit, I think there is no way in hell anyone would think this isn’t comfortable.” you gave a sweet grin up at him. “For a model you’re pretty good at this.” he joked and you poked him into his waist. “Hey!” he laughed. “You act like I wasn’t a drama kid in school. I might be good-looking but I’m also a nerd. You should know that best...space nerd.” you chuckled. “Stop calling me out like that or I’ll make you talk to that dude you find annoying over there.” he pointed at a man that had bombarded you with his boring business ideas months ago. “Don’t you dare, Stan!” you looked offended. “You wanna sit down with some wine then, madame?” he said in a posh accent. “Of course, it is incredibly instagramable.” you answered in the same way. A boomerang of your drinks with each other tagged in it and two glasses of wine later you officially had glued yourself to him. He had a very comforting vibe about him and you clearly helped with his anxious moments. A kiss was planted onto your temple and a black and white filter put on top of it. Followed by a funny selfie and a picture of your empty wine glasses. Shortly after you already left the party under the flickering lights of a handful of paparazzi. Holding hands and very close together. __________ +Pop Magazine - Gossip: Are Sebastian Stan and his ‘best friend’ dating?+ *@stanfanfam: Cause of death: That temple kiss.* *@vanillaiceice: Damn, is it the late 2000s? Seb leaving a party with a girl? Damn!* *@evanstackiee: For me it’s confirmed.* *@seabassbaby: It looks kinda staged but if it’s not I’m super happy for him!* __________ The second little thing on the list was a photoshooting together. Since you both had modelled for magazines before and with other models you were kinda in your element. It was for a mid-sized fashion magazine that published every month and you two were having fun all over the rented AirBnB. Some expensive yoga pants with a knitted oversized sweater and boots was the first thing you needed to wear for a scene depicting to come home. Falling into each other's arms multiple times definitely made you laugh because of the dumb faces he made. The next outfit was a sleeping outfit. Silk shorts and an airy white cropped shirt. Your socks were pink and had donuts on it. “Can I have them?” you gave them puppy eyes and the team laughed. Modelling while laying was hard. You needed to look realistic but also show of what you were wearing. Combined with a giant baby blowing air into your ear ended in him being pinched by you. He was clearly not prepared to see you in the third outfit. Lacey underwear and an open button-down mens shirt. You could literally see his brain work and giggled “C’mon, get it together.” He was wearing briefs and a white shirt, needing to embrace you from behind while you pretended to make scrambled eggs. “My eggs are definitely scrambled after this.” he whispered and you couldn’t hold back the genuine laugh, ending up in some good pictures. The last two outfits were a bit more editorial but still wearable and the pictures were taken outside. “Well, that wasn’t bad.” you said to him as you two walked out after changing back into your clothing. “For YOU.” he answered. “Poor baby, needed to see his friend in underwear.” you made fun of him. “Yo, it’s a different thing if I see an Instagram picture or the live version.” he defended himself. “Clearly...don’t you dare fall for me, dork.” you joked and he huffed. The walk back was silent but he looked down at you from time to time. You just couldn’t see his reaction every time he did. __________ +Pop Magazine - News: Sebastian Stan & Y/N Y/L/N modelling together. Check out these pictures!+ *@lancebastian: Damn, so this is really a thing, huh? Holy, that’s cute.* *@evanstackiee: Can they adopt me?* *@bellastann: That kitchen picture sent me into cardiac arrest!* _________ By now you were trained at sending each other stolen glances. No matter if you just needed to go to your management or when you had brunch together. But for the last three days he was in LA for the press junket of his new movie. There was this weird feeling again. It felt so close to fear but it wasn't fear. You couldn’t quite pinpoint it. *God, I’m way too used to being around you now.* *You miss not freezing to death in any given moment, admit it!* *No, real talk, I miss you.* *Realtalk: I miss you too...but admit it’s the freezing!* *D O R K !* You had taken a flight to LA the day after because an award show was next on your list. You were ten times more nervous for the dress sitting right than the man on your side. You also weren’t used to hair and makeup. You were an Instagram model, this was a luxury at experimental shoots. “You’d think I can smile on command and not look like shit...but I can’t.” you said to him before stepping onto the red carpet an hour later. “You’re looking good, stop worrying.” he said in his usual calming tone before gently pulling you forward. 10 minutes later the torture to your eyes was done and there were interviews. “What do you have to say about the rumors about your relationship status?” you were asked. “That people should care more about their life than mine...oh, and that he’s the best human being on the planet. Doesn’t matter in which way we are connected.” Sitting down at an award show with your hand being held was not were you thought you’d end up when you agreed to this but why not make memories? Your head naturally landed on his shoulder after a while. You really had missed him being in close proximity for those 4 days. His thumb softly wandered over the back of your hand. “What would you do if I’d win something?” he asked in a low voice. “Jump you?” your head went up again to see his eyes wandering over your face. “In a happy kinda way, I assume.” he had a lopsided smile on his face. “You’re thinking about that photoshoot again, huh? Literally a teenager.” you joked but saw his eyes wander to your lips for a bit too long before he concentrated on the host again. For the rest of the evening your mind went in circles about him playing that or being genuinely interested in you in that way.

__________ +Pop Magazine - Gossip: Mysterious answer to relationship question about (Y/L/N)stan+ *@vanillaiceice: They are boning, come ON!* *@evanstackiee: Look at how happy she is while she says it.* *@seabassbaby: Gosh, just say it!* __________ Today was the day you weren’t really prepared for. He had an off day from press and you were still in LA. Your plan was going to the beach and getting photographed. Well, it wasn’t your plan. It was the plan made for you. “I hate swimming in the ocean!” you mumbled. “Hey, it’s gonna be fine. You have two excuses to grab onto me, right?” he chuckled while watching you undress and revealing your red bikini. You both laid in the sun for a while, talking about his press junket and the social media reactions to this. “Wanna get wet?” you opened your eyes to a child in a man’s body wiggling his eyebrows. You punched his chest with a laugh and let him pull you up with him. Hand in hand you made your way into the ocean rather slowly, “And you didn’t want to admit that you freeze to death without me.” he chuckled. He got impatient and just grabbed your waist and jumped backwards into deeper water. After a squeak from your side and your nails clawing into his back a little bit too harshly, you got used to it. “Look. It’s fine.” he put some hair strands out of your face with his free hand. “I still hate the ocean.” you pouted, trying to overplay how fast your heart was suddenly beating. Oh hell no, you were not just slowly falling for your best friend...please? “I get that.” he put his hand onto your lower back and you put your legs around his hips. “You’re my floatie.” you giggled putting your head into the crook of his neck. “And you are...I can only assume a freezing rock.” you both chuckled.

Your head went up again to see a big grin on his face, “Fuck you.” “You love it.” he said like usual but this time you slowly nodded with a serious face and his eyes widened enough for you to notice. “Wait, I didn’t…” you exhaled deeply with attentive eyes on you. “I feel like we should just stop this. I don’t want to see this friendship break apart just because my body thinks close proximity is a good reason to send hormones out.” you got out of your system. “That’s an odd way of saying that you’re having a crush on me.” he smiled and put his other arm around you. “Yeah, well, I don’t wanna ruin this.” your eyes went down, you rarely made yourself this vulnerable. “You already did by, to say it in your nerdy words, making my body think it’s a good idea to send out hormones because we are in close proximity.” he answered with a nervous chuckle, hand going through his hair.

Your eyes met his again, “I stopped acting the moment it started, Y/N.” “Well, um, it took me till about approximately 5 minutes ago to realize that this odd feeling I have isn’t some suppressed fear.” you made fun of yourself to make the situation less awkward. “Wanna give them what they want?” his head nudged towards the beach with a smirk. “Do you mean give you what you want?” you joked and he remembered where he heard that before. “I hate being friends with you,” he bit his lip, “I’d much rather call you my girlfriend.” The reference made you melt, he remembered that dumb little conversation from two weeks ago. Your hands went from his shoulders to his head and his free hand pulled your head closer before your lips met. You didn’t care about the camera clicks in the background, you only cared about finally making out with the man that made you love brunch dates so much. It felt like an hour before you broke apart a little. Steel blue eyes were staring right into your soul and the most calming voice in the world said “I love you.” “I hope you don’t say that while thinking of me in underwear.” you joked. “Nah, don’t need to. You’re grabbing onto me in a bikini.” he said with his hands wandering down your body and a giant smirk on his face. “I love you too, dork.” ___________ +Pop Magazine - News: (Y/L/N)stan confirmed! Couple seen kissing at the beach.+ *@vanillaiceice: I’ll fistfight anyone that hates on her!* *@evanstackiee: Look at those SMILES.* *@seabassbaby: Maybe I’m crying.* *@lancebastian: She makes him happyyy.* *@bellastann: I think this gave me diabetes.* *@stanfanfam: Make babies! lol* *@Y/N: Gosh, @imsebastianstan we have heart eyes galore in these. Might need to go and get that checked out.* *@imsebastianstan: @Y/N, yeah, heard of that new disease called love. It’s attacking every part of your body and mind!* *@seabassbaby: For real...ADOPT ME!* _____________

M A S T E R L I S T

[tellywoodtrash]

Sanjivani - Weeks 2 + 3

This is now my lunchtime show (replacing random topical news comedy like Late Night with Seth Meyers, Last Week Tonight, Patriot Act, etc.) It’s a nice show to consume that way; I’m not super-involved in it, but it decently holds my interest for a solid 20 minutes as I shove something in my gaping maw.

Overall Plot

Marginal improvement in plot as the show and characters settle in. We learn more about the backgrounds of Ishani and Sid, and their relationship becomes much better. The Shashank/Anjali/Juhi/Vardhan dynamics are also nicely built up, and frankly the more interesting overarching plotline of the show.

The Medical Stuff

They seem to be going for a Grey’s Anatomy type of vibe, I think, focusing on one or two cases over the week. Nothing as interesting as in Grey’s, here it’s more routine kinda cases, but there does seem to be more focus on medicine than there ever was in DMG, which I’m kinda thankful for. While yes, I’m interested in the interpersonal dynamics, I also wanna see these people do their jobs (rather than just canoodling/having angsty fights in stairways and on-call rooms.) With other shows, I really really hate when a day goes on and on for weeks, but in this show, it’s realistic. Residents do often have to do 24 - 36 hour shifts, and each week being about one shift, it’s well-encapsulated; I like how the show flows from one day/shift/case to another.

The Acting

The seniors (Mohnish, Gurdeep, Sayantani) remain the best part, as expected, turning in consistent performances. Surbhi’s performance has toned down considerably, and that’s a big relief. The show would have been unwatchable if she hadn’t. Namit is still weak in some regards (like crying; god that one scene in Week 2 was really bad) but is getting better. He’s best in scenes where he has to be soft and considerate (comforting Anjali/Ishani/Sanya/Neeti etc.) or taking charge of things, coz he plays both these aspects confidently. I also like the chemistry when paired with Surbhi, because he plays off her really well. Only upwards from here, I should hope. The others are.... eh. They’re background characters, so they do what is expected of them.

The Characters

Sid: Sid’s the character that’s grown on me the most compared to the first week. They’ve thankfully toned down his fuckboy-ness waaaaaay down (not sure why they decided to introduce him that way, when it doesn’t even seem to be true of his character aside from in the pilot.) We find out a little more about his social background/family, and it explains why/how he is the way he is. I appreciate his camaraderie with Ishani; he’s obviously fond of her, and attracted to her as well (but in a casual way), but knows she has a lot to learn about how this place works and tries to be a good supporting team member to her, but not to the point where he lets her run amok. He tries to justify his ways to her, but is also willing to let her try her own things in the off case it does pay off; but always has a Plan B in his back pocket, because he knows things don’t work out as expected around here. I like his quiet confidence and integrity, but that he’s also willing to not mince words and/or throw hands if and when absolutely required. Not very realistic of a doctor, but eh, this is Tellywood. Chalta hai.

Ishani: Thankfully, Ishani has mellowed down quite a bit and isn’t as intolerable as she was in the first week. She’s quickly learning that things at Sanjivani are not as they appear and that her initial judgement of Sid was way too hasty/harsh, and has formed a delicate alliance with him. Not to say that she isn’t a stickler for rules anymore, or approves of his on-the-fly, jugaadu/sometimes outright wily ways to skirt around the rules, but she’s trying her best to maintain a balance; in how she tries to help the people who need it, in the most forthright manner. But she’s definitely more comfortable being flexible with “the rules” than she realizes. Her germophobia prevents her from getting comfortable with Sid’s physical proximity whenever he tries to comfort her/express thanks, but I think she appreciates the sentiment.

Shashank: God, I’m so grateful he’s still here. He’s kind of out of sorts due to the surgery, but he’s still very aware and involved in what’s going on in Sanjivani. His gentle battle with Anjali persists, with the latest episode making him give some leeway to her, quite unwillingly though.

Juhi: Beyond Shashank’s surgery, she didn’t really make much of an impression on me in these 2 weeks. She takes the COS job in a spur-of-the-moment decision, purely in an emergency situation, than really actually wanting it. She does a good enough job, stern and smart with the rioting mob/Vardhan, and compassionate and understanding with Ishani, but I do anticipate lots of trouble coming her way in the position. Especially with Rahul lurking mysteriously in the shadows, in cahoots with Vardhan.

Anjali: NOT ENOUGH ANJALI AS I WANT!!!!!! All we do see Anjali doing is either be hysterical during surgery, or sulking over not getting the COS post. For godssake, she’s an HOD, a competent doctor in her own right, can we see her at work too? I want to see her be the kickass boss bitch I know she is; maybe taking a few of these many million juniors under her wing and mentoring them? (She seems to have a good relationship with Sid, it would be nice to see that extend to some others too?) There was one good scene between Shashank and her where they peacefully discuss their issues at the end of this week, but I really need Anjali to DO more than just be standing around feeling bad for herself/manipulated by Vardhan/sniping at Juhi/being passive-aggressive at Shashank. I like that she was upfront enough with Juhi about not liking her, but I don’t like how they’re centering her whole character around just that. You’ve already done this character dirty in one iteration (DMG), please do not waste this chance to showcase the complex personality she is!

Vardhan: A kinda compelling asshole. He has a son that he keeps talking to on the phone, whom seems to dote on and wants to make the best impression on. But harkatein kaafi kameeni. But I also feel marginally sympathetic to him, because he’s trying his best to keep Sanjivani afloat financially. Drs. Shashank and Juhi’s bleeding-heart ways are admirable and all, but the ground realities of running an organization are quite different; and Vardhan is answerable to multiple people above him about it. So yeah I do hate him when he’s doing pettyass evil shit like booting a poor person off a donor list, but in some cases - esp. PR/admin/financial issues, I can see where he’s coming from. I just wish they’d stop making him so caricatureish in his villainy at times and kept him a slick evil, like most corporate types are.

Rishabh: Asshole Jr., but not at all compelling or complex like Vardhan. Just an outright classist asshole, looking to suck up to Vardhan and other richie-rich fuckers and get Sid in trouble. He’s the most annoying part of the show, honestly, constantly lurking around with his phone and filming Sid. Jeez, get a damn life, loser.

Rahil: So sweet and unproblematic, why don’t we see him more (instead of the irritating Rishabh)????? GIVE US MORE RAHIL!!!!!!!

Asha & Aman: They might as well have made them twins, coz they’re so alike (even have matchy-matchy names!) I despise when they unthinkingly run their mouths and blurt out whatever the hell they’re thinking, even to waaaay senior doctors like Juhi and Shashank. Their no-filter admonishments are quite welcome in the case of Ishani though, where they drill some sense into her head. Ultimately, they do have their hearts in the right place and are sincere doctors (if not the most knowledgeable), and I enjoy them in limited amounts; like in the scene where they’re watching Sid and Ishani brawling over the liver.

Asha: Tu idhar mitti ka dher bana khada hai, inki fight rok na??? Aman [watching Sid and Ishani literally bucking at each other while holding an icebox with a liver inside it]: Abbe pagal ho gayi hai ke, baukhlaaye hue saand se ho rakhe hain. Dulatti nahi khaani maine inki!

Neil: Like Rahil, he seems to be sweet and unproblematic, but I get the feeling that he suffers from some kinda health issue? He fainted at the first case out in the field (the bomb blast), Aman mentions he fainted again seeing a corpse that could donate a liver, and he seemed very out of breath when he came to inform Sid/Ishani about another liver donor. I find it hard to believe that a first year resident could be this squeamish about things you get used to by the end of med school, so I really think there’s something else going on here. Is he going to be the Dr. Omi equivalent (the tragically ill character) of this season? I would like to see more of him (than the other jr. residents), because the actor is very measured and likable.

Rahul: We haven’t SEEN him yet, but we have heard him and what we’ve heard......... Does not bode well. I haven’t seen Sanjivani 1, so I don’t know the character as such, but wasn’t he the lead? They’re bringing him back but as an antagonist? Seems quite out-of-character, but I am veryyyyyyyy intrigued about this development, and especially how Juhi fits into all of this.

Overall Rating: 3.5/5

[jecngs]

                it’s  ya  girl  𝒅𝒓𝒊  (nineteen,  she/her,  pst  but  i’m  in  the  philippines  for  two  weeks  so  that’s gmt+8 !),  a  soft  edgy  born  with  a  name  that  means  "dark  one  of  the  lord"  on  friday  the  13th  !  if  you’re  meeting  me  for  the  first  time,  some  fun  facts  are  that  i  have  the  incredibly  dangerous  combo  of  high  ambition  and  poor  time  management  and  i’d  Risk  It  All  for  a.c.e,  ateez,  and  loona  !  so,  anyway,  here’s  my  poor,  poor  girl,  miss  amelia  !  why  i  did  her  so  dirty  is  a  Good  Question  i  do  not  have  the  answer  to,  but  let's  plot  !

* ╱  𝑸𝑼𝑰𝑪𝑲 𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑻𝑺

𝗕𝗜𝗥𝗧𝗛  𝗡𝗔𝗠𝗘:  amelia  christine  jeong   𝗡𝗜𝗖𝗞𝗡𝗔𝗠𝗘:  lia,  li,  call  her  amy  and  she’ll  beat  u  up   𝗔𝗚𝗘:  twenty   𝗗𝗢𝗕:  november  29,  1998   𝗭𝗢𝗗𝗜𝗔𝗖:  sagittarius  sun,  aries  moon   𝗢𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡:  bisexual   𝗢𝗖𝗖𝗨𝗣𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡:  actress

* ╱  𝑩𝑨𝑪𝑲𝑮𝑹𝑶𝑼𝑵𝑫

         ♡   daughter  of  edith  byun  and  christopher  jeong,  two  major  players  in  broadway  (and  later  on  the  film  industry),  she  was  practically  famous  in  the  industry  before  she  was  even  born.  it  was  without  a  doubt  that  she  was  anticipated  to  be  nothing  short  of  talented  and  successful  once  she  popped  out  of  the  womb!  imagine  legendary  dance  couple  keone  and  mari  madrid’s  child  but  if  they  both  had  a  reputation  akin  to  idina  menzel  or  lea  salonga.  that’s  basically  lia.

        ♡   with  this,  her  parents  unfortunately  succumbed  to  public  pressure  and  wanted  to  ensure  that  their  daughter  would  meet  these  expectations.  to  fall  short  would  be  the  greatest  misfortune  on  her  reputation,  and  they  simply  would  not  have  that.  was  it  the  healthiest  mindset  to  have  raising  their  first  and  only  child?  lmao  no,  but  it’s  the  mindset  that  came  with  the  fame  they  had.  eyes  would  be  on  her  the  moment  she  came  into  the  world,  so  she  had  to  be  everything  the  public  wanted  her  to  be.

        ♡   a  few  months  before  lia  was  scheduled  to  be  born,  her  father  was  cast  in  the  us  tour  of  miss  saigon  (pretend  there  was  one  in  1998),  and  it  overlapped  with  the  due  date!  he  was  supposed  to  be  performing  at  the  pantages  for  a  few  weeks  in  that  general  timeframe  of  when  her  mom  could  be  going  into  labor,  so  they  took  a  risk  and  just…  moved  to  los  angeles  because  he  wasn’t  going  to  miss  the  birth  of  his  child!  so  ever  since  she  was  born  she  resided  in  the  hollywood  area!

        ♡    she  was  homeschooled  for  a  majority  of  her  childhood,  but  ur  a  Big  Fool  if  u  thought  it  was  by  her  parents!  they  were  incredibly  busy  with  their  own  careers  so  she  had  a  nanny  and  a  homeschool  teacher!  and  to  be  Quite  Honest  her  nanny  was  more  of  a  mother  to  her  than  miss  edith  could  ever  be!  to  lia,  her  parents  were  more  like  a  dream,  a  fantasy,  some  sort  of  ethereal  beings  —  untouchable.  [cue  parental  longing]

        ♡   despite  how  much  the  media  loved  to  talk  about  amelia  and  her  parents,  she  didn't  actually  get  to  see  them  all  that  often!  they  loved  her,  there's  no  doubt  about  it,  but  they  didn't  exactly  know  to  express  it...  despite  being  acclaimed  performers  SGKSDJGHDS  so!  basically  in  lia's  mind,  succeeding  meant  getting  love  from  her  parents  because  they  always  seemed  to  pay  the  most  attention  to  her  when  she  was  doing  something  impressive  —  they  loved  to  show  her  off  to  their  colleagues  like  some  sort  of  dog  who  can  do  tricks.  lia  ate  up  this  "love",  though,  because  there's  nothing  that  beats  the  glimmer  in  their  eyes  when  they  watch  her  perform.

        ♡    lia  took  private  lessons  for  everything  ranging  from  acting,  voice,  and  dance!  fun  fact:  she’s  classically  trained  in  several  dance  styles,  such  as  contemporary,  jazz,  ballet,  tap,  and  hip  hop!  she  was  basically  set  to  follow  her  parents’  footsteps  with  all  of  this  training.  she  played  several  child/teen  roles  in  musicals  thanks  to  her  family,  and  it  was  an  almost  effortless  kickstart  to  her  career.

        ♡    when  she  was  high  school  aged,  lia  was  admitted  into  la  county  school  of  the  arts,  but  she  wasn’t  there  for  long.  despite  growing  up  being  taught  how  to  handle  lingering  paparazzi  and  answer  questions  interviewers  sent  her  way,  she  was  never  quite  taught  how  to  handle  the  Hell  that  is  high  school.  she  wasn’t  accepted  well  into  the  social  climate  and  was  frequently  bullied  and  judged.  they  didn’t  believe  that  she  worked  to  be  there,  she  was  only  there  because  of  her  parents.  they  didn’t  actually  know  anything  about  her,  but  they  made  these  assumptions  that  eventually  led  to  her  pulling  out  of  school.  she  had  been  excited  to  finally  see  what  it’d  be  like  to  make  friends  of  her  own  —  friends  that  weren’t  just  fed  to  her  because  of  who  her  parents  were.  she  didn’t  know  that  same  fact  would  make  it  all  the  more  difficult.

* ╱  𝑪𝑨𝑹𝑬𝑬𝑹

        ♡    she's  a  theatre  kid  through  and  through,  and  that's  all  i  have  to  say  about  that!  lia  grew  up  adoring  the  theatre,  not  only  watching  the  shows  her  parents  were  casted  in  but  almost  every  single  one  she  could  become  an  audience  to!  it  was  to  no  surprise  when  the  public  found  her  in  minor  and  supporting  roles  as  a  child,  and  it  was  pretty  much  expected  for  her  to  become  one  of  the  next  big  names  in  broadway  —  she  was  anticipated  to  make  the  Big  Move  to  new  york  once  she  got  her  footing  in  the  industry!

        ♡    as  time  progressed,  she  continued  to  pursue  theatre,  slowly  taking  on  more  mature  roles.  every  now  and  then  she  would  be  given  television/film  offers,  but  it  was  more  of  a  side ��gig  at  the  time.  theatre  was  truly  what  she  was  passionate  about.  even  though  it  was  a  profession  forced  on  her,  it  was  no  lie  that  she  actually  enjoyed  it.

        ♡    she  began  to  develop  her  own  fame  outside  of  her  parents  around  the  time  she  was  seventeen/eighteen,  with  a  supporting  role  in  an  independent  film  that  garnered  pretty  notable  success.  around  this  time,  her  parents  invested  in  a  publicist/agent  just  for  her,  a  relative  of  edith  who  was  also  involved  in  the  industry.  it's  true  when  they  say  it's  bad  to  mix  personal  affairs  with  business  because  things  began  to  take  a  bit  of  a  turn  for  miss  lia!

        ♡    her  pr  team  was  really  big  on  transforming  her  the  Big  Name  everyone  expected  her  to  be,  all  the  while  creating  an  identity  completely  separate  from  her  family  where  she  can  thrive.  and  that’s  exactly  what  they  did.  they  created  an  identity.

        ♡    she  had  a  love/hate  relationship  with  being  associated  with  her  parents.  on  one  hand,  it  was  a  burden  having  to  constantly  live  with  the  expectation  of  being  just  as  successful  as  them,  but  on  the  other,  it  fueled  her  fantasies  of  being  the  dream  family  she  had  always  wanted  them  to  be.

        ♡    they  stressed  the  importance  of  whom  she  associated  with,  they  slowly  transitioned  her  out  of  theatre  and  immersed  her  completely  into  the  film  industry,  lining  her  up  for  roles  that  would  eventually  become  quite  memorable.  they  took  who  lia  was  and  restructured  her  as  they  saw  fit,  and  lia  went  along  with  all  of  this  because  they  constantly  reassured  her  that  this  was  what  was  best  for  her  career.  she  didn't  want  to  go  against  family,  for  to  ruin  any  connections  with  her  parents  would  be  a  step  closer  to  losing  them  completely,  so  she  played  along  in  this  role  made  just  for  her.

        ♡    her  brain  eventually  became  fine  tuned  to  see  relationships  as  “how  can  this  benefit  me?”  rather  than  actual  companionship  which  Sucks  bc  she  totally  wants  friendship  —  she’s  always  craved  it  —  but  in  the  back  of  her  mind  there’s  always  this  lil  checkbox  where  she  has  to  get  something  from  this  which  is  Not  Healthy  but  she  doesn’t  know  what  to  do  about  it  because  she’s  in  too  deep  to  change  anything

        ♡    she’s  become  so  detached  from  her  individuality  and  become  the  rising  starlet  her  team  shaped  her  into.  she  hasn’t  been  in  a  musical  production  in  a  long  time,  so  it’s  as  if  they  ripped  a  major  part  of  her  identity  away  from  her.  but  i  guess  that  was  the  plan  all  along.  i  don’t  wanna  say  that  her  mom's  cousin  has  some  lingering  resentment  toward  her  due  something  along  the  lines  of  always  living  in  her  shadow…  but  her  mom's  cousin  has  some  lingering  resentment  toward  her  mom.  it’s  just  cleverly  disguised  because  lia  is  technically  thriving  when  you  look  at  it  from  the  outside.  inside,  she  yearns  for  her  past.

        ♡    in  the  past  few  years,  she’s  been  conditioned  to  want  the  world.  she  thinks  she  is  owed  it,  but  this  sentiment  is  also  fueled  by  her  longing.  she  has  this  hunger  for  success  that’s  highkey  kinda  unhealthy!  she  isn’t  even  capable  of  discussing  these  things  with  her  parents  because  they’re  all  busy  all  the  time!  her  team  would  tell  her  to  say  yes  to  projects,  pr  stuff  including  false  articles  later  debunked  just  for  the  publicity,  whatever  works!  she’s  been  forced  into  this  addiction  for  attention  but  it’s  pretty  much  a  result  of  her  channeling  the  negative  energy  toward  her  career…  to  help  her  career?  but  in  a  way  that’s  detrimental  to  her  own  health.  her  sleep  schedule?  fucked  up!  she’s  ruining  herself  from  the  inside  out  and  she  doesn’t  want  to  admit  it!

        ♡    her  sentiment  toward  her  public  identity  is  akin  to  lottie  person  of  the  snotgirl  comic!  who  she  is  interpreted  as  on  social  media  isn’t  the  whole  truth.  she  posts  as  if  she’s  under  careful  watch  because,  well,  she  is.  anything  her  team  didn't  like  simply  didn't  cut  it  and  was  deleted  almost  immediately  followed  by  a  sharp  scolding.  "image  is  everything"  is  one  of  the  many  sentences  ingrained  into  her  mind.  an  effortless  kind  of  everyday,  that's  what  she  was  supposed  to  be.  idk  how  to  explain  it  well  but  u  know  those  instagrams  where  it  looks  super  casual  but  is  probably  super  planned?  yes?  idk  in  my  head  she  has  an  instagram  feed  like  hyulari  or  pameluft  where  it  looks  rly  normal  but  it's  rly  pretty

        ♡    i'm  trying  to,  like,  put  it  into  words  what  her  persona  is  perceived  as,  but  it's  something  along  the  lines  of  a  person  you  think  you  know  but  you  really  don't.  you  see  her  posts,  you  see  who  she's  with,  where  she's  having  coffee,  but  who  is  lia,  really?

        ♡    clearly,  this  entire  situation  can  get  extremely  overwhelming!  the  melatonin  she  takes  to  help  control  her  sleeping  habits  also  gifts  her  with  the  side  effect  of  irritability,  so  there  have  been  times  when  she  “slipped  up”  and  Snapped!  her  fans  are  quick  to  defend  her,  however,  claiming  she’s  tired  and  needs  rest,  or  place  blame  on  the  individuals  who  dare  disrespect  her  privacy  and  personal  space. 

        ♡    scandals  are  also  something  she  isn’t  immune  to.  she  frequents  club  and  party  settings  often,  and  rumors  often  circulate  about  her  activities,  but  it's  easy  to  shift  blame  on  bad  influences.  her  image  isn't  exactly  squeaky  clean,  but  hey,  as  her  team  likes  to  say,  "total  prudes  don't  get  attention"

        ♡    people  who  work  with  lia  either  love  her  or  hate  her,  there's  really  no  in  between.  she's  friendly  or  stuck-up.  some  believe  she's  ungrateful,  maybe  they're  onto  something.  she  doesn't  cause  trouble  on  sets,  but  people  love  to  make  assumptions  about  this  girl  whose  identity  they  can't  seem  to  crack.  but  they'll  be  damned  if  they  don't  see  her  come  in  every  morning  with  a  smile  on  her  face.

        ♡    if  it  wasn't  clear,  she  despises  the  identity  she’s  forced  into!  it  feels  like  a  role  she  has  to  play  almost  24/7,  and  she’d  easily  give  it  all  up  if  it  didn’t  mean  losing  everything  good  that  came  from  it.  she  missed  the  girl  she  used  to  be,  the  girl  anyone  could  easily  approach  to  talk  about  their  day.  she  doesn’t  know  amelia  anymore.  she  hasn’t  been  amelia  for  a  long  time,  only  lia.

        ♡    she  learned  recently  that  the  contract  with  her  team  is  set  for  a  renewal  soon,  which  prompted  a  crisis  within  lia.  to  terminate  the  contract  would  mean  freedom,  but  at  what  cost?  spicy,  stay  tuned.

* ╱  𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑺𝑶𝑵𝑨𝑳𝑰𝑻𝒀

        ♡    lia  and  her  relationship  with  her  own  identity  has  definitely  affected  her  personality  and  how  she  portrays  herself  even  when  she  is  at  her  most  comfortable

        ♡    my  base  inspiration  that  Started  It  All  for  lia  came  from  me  watching  a  stephanie  soo  vlog  KSDLHGDSG  so  yea  she's  like  this  likable,  kinda  loud  and  blunt  personality  but  that  comes  more  as  a  surprise  to  people  who  get  to  know  her  because  she's  been  molded  into  having  a  more  suppressed  type  of  character  —  friendly,  but  never  too  much

        ♡    for  the  sake  of  her  sanity,  i'm  gonna  say  that  she  still  holds  on  to  her  personality  in  fear  of  becoming  too  absorbed  by  her  public,  consumable  image,  but  there  are  times  when  she  confuses  the  two.  she  can  slip  up  and  say  something  a  bit  too  blunt  in  an  interview  or  find  herself  holding  back  with  her  close  friends.  she's  essentially  become  a  blend  of  her  true  nature  and  her  public  image  where  it's  almost  the  same  thing

        ♡    incredibly,  incredibly  insecure!  lia  does  not  have  a  hold  on  her  own  identity,  so  even  the  smallest  things  will  make  her  question  everything!  she  constantly  wonders  if  there’s  a  party  happening  that  she’s  not  invited  to,  if  people  like  her,  if  people  are  gossiping  about  her.  so  many  aspects  of  her  current  identity  have  been  conditioned  to  be  close  enough  to  genuine  that  she  actually  doesn’t  know  what’s  real  anymore.

        ♡    she  can  be  a  little  bit  manipulative  if  it  comes  down  to  her  career.  she  doesn’t  really  mean  it  but  she  can’t  help  it  at  this  point!

        ♡    if  she’s  friends  with  someone,  even  if  it’s  for  some  symbiosis-type  relationship,  she  will  play  into  that  role,  she  will  act  as  if  it’s  real.  even  if  she  doesn’t  believe  it,  she  wants  to  believe  it  because  she  also  is  unsure  if  she’s  capable  of  real  feelings??!  she  thinks  she’s  devoid  of  emotion  but  she  just  …  doesn’t  think  about  it.  like,  she  doesn’t  want  to  admit  to  herself  that  she  cares  about  people  bc  she  knows  the  Ugly  side  of  her  brain  will  hyper-analyze  the  relationship  and  find  ways  to  sabotage  it  for  herself  to  the  point  where  she  can’t  enjoy  it  anymore  —  so  i  guess  it's  safest  for  her  to  think  that  this  really  isn't  her!  coping  mechanisms  let's  roll  out!

        ♡   she’s  definitely  had  her  fair  share  of  significant  others  in  the  past,  but  they’ve  been  mixed  into  a  bag  of  a  bunch  of  pr  relationships  (she's  had  so  many)  so  she  doesn’t  know  if  she’s  capable  of  actually  loving  someone.  it!  all!  seems!  fake!  but  she  definitely  craves  affection  and  will  try  to  find  it  wherever  she  can.

        ♡    tldr  she's  actually  a  nice  gal,  outgoing,  caring,  but  she  can't  help  but  think  that  she's  a  robot  because  she  thinks  too  much  about  how  people  see  her

* ╱  𝑭𝑼𝑵 𝑭𝑨𝑪𝑻𝑺

       ♡    super  prone  to  asian  glow

       ♡    loves  anything  peach!  peach  soju  with  yakult  is  her  favorite  alcoholic  beverage,  peach  is  her  favorite  color,  but  she  doesn't  like  actual  peaches???  make  it  make  sense

       ♡    credited  as  lia  jeong  in  everything.  feels  weird  if  someone  addresses  her  as  amelia  if  they're  not  reading  an  official  document  or  really  close  to  her.

       ♡    feels  a  strange  connection  to  "the  i  love  you  song"  from  the  25th  annual  putnam  county  spelling  bee

       ♡    her  favorite  film  genre  to  work  on  is  definitely  romance  because  it's  fun  to  pretend  to  be  loved!  coming  of  age  is  a  close  second.

[goldendream-s]

don’t be a fool (pt. 3)

Summary; Shawn and Y/N finally find time to try to make amends, but will the chances work out in their favor?

PART ONE || PART TWO

MASTERLIST || REQUEST

Once you felt the last of your tears disappear, you attempt to regroup yourself. It was very tempting to stay on the ground to bawl your eyes out because it was much easier to do nothing than to confront a problem.  All you wanted to do at the moment was lock yourself in the apartment and never go out, but you knew that you had some relationships and friendships to stitch up before you could relax.

It’s been itching you from the minute you saw Shawn in person again. You could either fight for you and Shawn to be together again, or you could choose to go apologize for kicking Cameron out and makeup with him instead. Neither would be easy, especially speaking how both boys were very close to you. It’d now be a matter of who you decide to stay with. That is, if both of them don’t already hate you.

You push away thoughts of your actions of the future and focus specifically on what happened just now and the weeks leading up to it. You just confessed your feelings for Cameron, but was it wrong that your heart beat faster and felt more alive than ever when Shawn stepped through your doors? Was it wrong that his note in the bouquet of roses made you feel like the two of you never broke up? Was it wrong that it hurt more when Shawn left you, than when you kicked Cameron out? Was in terribly wrong that even though it felt like Shawn pushed you off a cliff, you were still trying to hang on because you didn’t quite want to give up on Shawn yet? 

It soon became very evident that you still had feelings for Shawn, but where did that put the emotions that you just spilled out to your roommate, Cameron, at? You were starting to question if you ever did actually like Cameron, and the guilt started to get to you. He did so much for you, but you played him. He told you as soon as news came out about Shawn with a new girl, and he always had open arms to your tears.

And you, all you did was throw him in the dirt. You used him as a rebound. You kicked him out, when all he wanted to do was help and shelter you from all of the hurt that you were feeling. It didn’t even hurt a bit when Cameron left, and you now knew why. You made a mental note to apologize to him later, but you only had your mind set on one thing for the time being.

Shawn.

As for Shawn, you didn’t really have a plan on how you were going to work things out with him, but it’d be worth a shot. There was obviously some very bad timing between the two of you, but most of it could be explained if you found him soon enough.

Where could he possibly be? You start brainstorming all of the places he could’ve possibly gone within a two hour period, and your mind took you to the park just a few blocks down from your apartment complex. To any passerby, the park would just seem like a dingy play area that no one even goes to anymore, but to you and Shawn, it’d be a spot to hang out and bond with each other. 

While dating, the two of you would go to the park during the midnight hours and would just talk about life, future plans for the relationship, and even about getting a pet together – everything and anything. It’d be something you and Shawn often did to unwind and to simply enjoy each other’s presence. Reminiscing in these past memories made your knees week and lips quiver, but you continued to force your feet to take you to the park.

You shove your hands in your pocket and take in your surroundings: busy street lights, fast cars, and signs of the many businesses lining the streets. The urban scene almost made the park seem out of place in all of the midst, but it added character to your small community.

As you arrived to the park and scanned the perimeter in hopes of finding the silhouette of the six foot boy. Your shoulders sagged further down as you found no sign of him. Even after circling the edge of the park and kicking around the wood chips while doing so, the playground remained lifeless.

Nevertheless, you decided to take advantage of being at the park and took the ladder connected to the platform leading to the slides. On your way up, you almost screamed and fell off of the ladder as you found a very familiar body laying down, with his eyes closed. He had both of his hands latched onto each other, resting on his stomach, while his right foot was crossed over the left.

You scolded at yourself for not looking here in the first place. This was where you and Shawn often cuddled while at the park. Not only did the spot give the perfect view of everything surrounding the park, but it also let in the refreshing night breeze.

Contemplating your next move, you stared at the Canadian boy for a few seconds before coming to the conclusion that you were probably being very creepy. You collected the courage to say something. 

“Hey,” You instantly regretted saying that, realizing how stupid you just sounded.

Shawn didn’t make any movement for a second before opening one eye at you and closing them again. He even went as far as scooting away from you. The whole action was silently done in less than ten seconds as he continued to obviously ignore you.

You became slight annoyed, but you pressed on. “It’s funny how you’re the one ignoring me, when I should be the one that’s mad.”

Those words got Shawn to open both of his eyes in a matter of seconds. He pushed himself upright and deadpanned to you. He opened his mouth, his eyes full of pure anger. “It’s funny you say that,” he mimics you, “Last time I checked, you were the one sucking off another guy’s face, when I thought we agreed to wait for each other.”

Fuming at this point, you quickly retorted. “You were the one that messed up everything first!” Shawn flinched at your harsh demeanor, but you continued. “Would you like to explain that girl you were with? You and her were practically all of the magazines and twitter for weeks.”

It felt like you were stabbing your own heart again when you brought up the gorgeous girl that was holding hands with Shawn on every magazine stand. She was everything you wanted to be, making you somewhat less comfortable in your own skin.

Something must’ve flickered in Shawn’s mind, because he suddenly seemed a lot less angry and intimidating as his manner softened. You waited for a response, but you got none. Using your hands to push yourself up, getting ready to leave, but you were abruptly pulled back down.

“I-I can explain,” Shawn murmured. 

“Well, I’m waiting,” You harshly spat. You had no idea where this new-found confidence was coming from, but you loved it. Spending this last few weeks being strong for yourself certainly gave you the edge in this conversation.

Taking a deep breath, Shawn began to tell you his side of the story. “It was my publicity team’s idea. I promise you I had no part or say in this. They thought it’d be a good idea to create a PR stunt to pr-promote the album and tour. I didn’t even know the girl until they brought her in and told me we’d have to act like we were dating. I-I was honestly so scared about the fake relationship thing because I didn’t want to hurt my fans, but most of all, I didn’t wanna make it seem like I broke our promise and left you in the dust. You were on my mind 24/7, if I’m being honest. I didn’t know what to do though, that’s why I didn’t text you. I thought if I pushed myself away from you, it’d make it easier for you to get over me,” Shawn rambled.

“I wasn’t even able to tell my family that the whole relationship was a fake stunt, let alone you or my friends. I small part of me was telling me that maybe you still l-loved me, and that I could just explain everything to you and that we’d be able to mend everything back together after my tour,” He continued.

Your emotions were all over the place. So much for being strong. The walls that you thought had been built up in your time away from Shawn was slowly but surely cracking with every word that came out of his mouth. From the look of his eyes, Shawn seemed to be feeling the same. You weren’t sure if you wanted to hug Shawn and tell him that everything would be okay, or to slap him for thinking that he could do this to you and act like everything would be okay as soon as he came back. Fake or not, seeing Shawn and another girl together hurt you more than words could ever explain.

Shawn continued with his explanation as you sat in silence. “I know that we weren’t officially together while I was on tour, but I wouldn’t back stab you nor cheat on you, ever. You were in my mind every time I was with the PR stunt girl. Hell, I don’t even remember her name! I was obviously stupid to think that you wouldn’t move on after everything, but I get it. I told you this the day I left, and I’ll tell you again. I don’t deserve you, and you could find someone better. I was obviously right, and I understand if you don’t want to be with me. Cameron will treat you so much be-”

You were tired of all of the words coming out of Shawn face, so you kissed him, which quickly hushed him. He surprisingly returned the gesture instantly, and your fingers soon laced in his soft brown wavy curls. They say that when you’re kissing someone who you truly like, you can feel sparks, but this was a totally new feeling. It was like nostalgia, joy, and desperation all in one. You’ve been waiting for this moment so long, that your brain simply pushed away everything bad that has happened between you and Shawn in the last year. All you focused on was the boy in front of you who you haven’t seen in a whole year.

You finally had Shawn back in your arms, and even if it wouldn’t be easy, you wanted to forgive him. You wanted to talk through everything with him, and you wanted to find a way to make things work. There were obviously numerous misunderstandings between both of you, but you wanted to forget about them just as much as Shawn did.

Shawn grazed his hands across your waist, until they found a comfortable spot. Tears came down your cheeks, but this time, it wasn’t out of hurt. It’d been so long since you’ve felt sparks and love like this, and if it were up to you, you’d never want the passionate kiss to end. It finally hit you how much you truly missed Shawn, and you were glad he was back home for the time being.

Running out of air, you hesitantly pulled away and immediately hugged Shawn. “I missed you so much. I’m so sorry. I love you,” your words were muffled against Shawn’s broad chest.

“You don’t need to be sorry, Y/N. It was all my fault. I should’ve told you about the PR stunt anyways. Maybe we wouldn’t even be in this predicament if I told you earlier. Please forgive me, baby. I honestly don’t know what I’d do without you. I love you, so, so, so, much.” Shawn pecked you lips between every ‘so’.

“I forgive you Shawn,” you say while pulling him loser if that was even possible. It’d been so long since you’ve felt so say in someone’s arms. Of course, you and Cameron shared moments like these, but never on such deep and intimate levels as this. In these very moments, you knew that all you ever wanted was Shawn. He could be separated from you for years, but no amount of distance and other guys could ever bring you to stop loving Shawn.

You don’t know how long you and Shawn stayed like this – tangled into each other, breathing in each other’s presence. You couldn’t fathom it, but something about this boy drove you insane and love crazy. He could ask you to do something so out of this world, but you’d do it anyways. As long as you could still call him yours at the end of the day.

“I missed you at the show,” Shawn broke the silence, referring to the concert he had in your hometown. The same very concert that you refunded your tickets for. You slightly blushed, but luckily the darkness hid your embarrassment.

Chuckling, you cleverly respond, “Why would I need to do that when you sing all the time in our apartment? Like a concert, but free,” You giggle.

Shawn returns the laugh, making you feel the vibrations from lying on his chest. “I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Shawn. Don’t ever let go,” You plead.

“Could never imagine it, babe.” Shawn replies.

The two of you spent the rest of the night like that at the park – catching up with each other and exchanging “I love you’s” while staring out into the city lights. You lived for these type of moments, and you were glad to say that you were finally at home again. Finally with Shawn again. 

You might’ve looked like a fool for trying, but sometimes, the effort is worth the person you’re fighting for.

Hello!! The series is unfortunately over, but I hope you guys enjoyed the ending and the Don’t Be a Fool series as a whole! I know this post was on the shorter side, but I didn’t want to drag anything.

Let me know how I did, and feel free to message me or request prompts (if they are open) here!

p.s. make sure to like and/or reblog this post if you liked this, it’d really mean a lot to me :))

[like-sands-of-time]

so this is something I sorta come to terms with in every fandom im in with a closeted ship but it's literally always relevant, and always kinda weird to think about as a stan but it's still so so important to mention...

as shippers it doesn't matter how much we love them, how loyal we are to them as individuals and as a couple, our #1 needs to be their happiness not ours. what I mean by that so this doesn't sound wayyy out of context is if they don't wanna ever come out, if they just don't want/feel they can't/etc. to come out now but maybe they might change their mind, if they feel pressured either by themselves, by those around them, or even by hollywood in general to make choices regarding pr relationships that they look absolutely miserable in then all we can do is support them. sure you can leave the fandom any time you want, there's no contract or obligation or anything but if you can see past the fact that they're not living out their lives the way you want them and the way they feel they need to(and let's just think about it, how content do you think your idols actually are that they even think they have to do something like that because they're worried what their fans might think, what directors, costars etc. might think, how their career might not make it very far because Hollywood is so fake progressive about things) im sure you can see that that choice doesn't make them any happier ultimately. maybe it was an obligation one made for a project. or maybe their teams both were like hey we should do a mutually beneficial pr relationship.. IDK and we won't ever 100% know cos we're not in the meeting rooms w them.

ANYWAY I got sidetracked a bit. the point of this whole thing is yeah you can get frustrated with them, I'm sure they're very frustrated with the choices they make too at times, but that doesn't change their values or who they are, that doesn't mean they're a liar and everything they might have said about political, religious, personal, etc. views is a lie bc this one part of Hollywood that absolutely sucks.

just.. realize that you're not always gonna be 100% happy with the person you stan or the ship you like because they're real ppl who have to make decisions that have more reasons behind them than we could possibly begin to speculate given we don't actually know everything. our whole blogs are dedicated to summarizing what we see and what we think it means based on other ships, based on them, and based on how much we respect them honestly cos some of you guys assume the absolute worst of your idols when any sort of headline or anything appears.

just, remember that they make mistakes just like you, except their entire lives are blown up so people like you who make proportional mistakes can analyze literally everything and make assumptions about them based on those choices, those .001 second flashes to get picture perfect moments.

also I saw this in someone else's post so im not trying to steal but it was really accurate imo.. specifically regarding this fandom, charmie: Timmy's motivation to do this stuff isn't for the attention or fame, that much seems crystal clear to me. he embraces the awkwardness and sort of self deprication that's very real for our generation. he embraces the fact that he is who he is, I don't think he's ever thought he was that cool popular guy, nor do I think he wants to be. he seems far too introspective and wise for his age to get too close to that kind of thing.

Timmy's motivation is more to not be the minor/side role his whole career. he loves what he does, he doesn't care what genre the movie is, what work he has to put into himself physically or mentally bc he likes the challenge.(he's said all of that). he just wants to be the lead role imo. he wants to be a main actor not stuck on the sidelines or forgotten about and there's nothing wrong with that. ESPECIALLY because he truly does have the talent, the dedication and hard work, the love of what he does to bring all his characters to life even if they are the farthest thing from his irl personality. he seems to make friends with everyone he works with, seems genuinely happy to be where he is even if he's really nervous.

unfortunately for that goal you have to be seen a certain way and Timmy is not some buff, masculine, manly dude bro guy. I'm pretty sure from the beginning of cmbyn promo there has been name calling about his sexuality based on his body type/looks and it's absolutely not cool but yet nothing really new.. that type of "based on what you look like you must be like x" is what drives so much of that industry to work out and diet til their unhealthy, to change their personalities to seem more likeable, etc.

I really hope with the roles he's done so far it's enough to show that you don't have to be that guy to be lead material but i genuinely don't know... I don't think it's something he even wants to do long term, he seems v happy to have a close honest relationship with fans no matter where in the world he goes and he doesn't seem to be losing his love for his job and anywhere it takes him so if The King and Dune go well let's hope he's allowed more freedom to be who he truly is bts.

I really dont think he's some manipulative guy and I never have been one to change lots of ppls opinions but honestly I'm not a hardcore stan. I saw the movie (cmbyn) and gushed a bit for a little bit in the beginning of 2018 but ive literally only just come back bc I saw he was doing some more cool stuff.

I've been in fandoms where the two ppl in the ship haven't even been seen together in years, everytime fans comment about the things they say or how close they might be there's an article about how they hate each other. ive seen ppl I stan struggle to get respect in such a tough/unfeeling industry with their hard work and fear being honest and sabotaging their hard work. it's a real thing and almost any now-out actor/musician/etc. that I've seen talk about it talks about just how traumatic it truly is. even if you aren't internally homophobic, even if you were cool with yourself and your life before, anxiety, self doubt and the fear of judgement and career sabotage seriously messes w artists. i don't know that everyone out there is as strong-willed as we think we are.

THATS ALL I HAVE TO SAY FOR NOW sorry for rambling and pls bring on the comments about how dumb and ignorant I am it's really great seeing how ppl handle differences in opinion. (:

[tyleroakley-obsessed]

Ed. Note: Contributor Wesley is here to tell us all about a new project coming from a group of MCA alumni – and they need our support to get this project done! Their Kickstarter is only until July 4th at 9 a.m. so time is running out. Donate here and get all kinds of fun things – including their 170-page color anthology, enamel pins, t-shirts, and more.  A group of Memphis College of Art alumni are coming together to produce Paper Cuts—a comic anthology of over 170 color pages created by 16 artists living across the country. Spearheaded by Art Director Elliot Boyette and Editor Shane McDermott, both MCA alumni, the project was brought to Kickstarter to raise money for the printing and shipping of physical copies that’ll hopefully find a nice new home on your bookshelf.  The comics included range from post-apocalyptic fast food chain restaurants, to cavemen on a wooly mammoth hunt and apes telling jokes, to gunslinging witches, and other stuff I can’t wait to read.  I sat down with Elliot, Shane, and Paper Cuts contributors Olivia Logan and Mathis Ryan at the cafe in Crosstown Arts to talk about bringing Paper Cuts from conception to completion. Elliot Boyette is a graphic designer for the City of Memphis and Paper Cuts’ Art Director Shane McDermott is a former Memphis College of Art professor and Editor of Paper Cuts. Wesley: You were all independent working artists before deciding to collaborate. What are some of the benefits of doing an anthology versus instead of trying to release stuff individually? Elliot: I think that’s a divided approach, when you go individual. It’s hard to get attention for a new artist just starting out, and a lot of us were just coming out of college and still are. We were inspired by Kazu Kibushi’s Flight anthology, and a lot of those people are big name artists now who got their start with an anthology. So as a way to start our comics careers, we thought we’d come together and make a book with everybody in it. Mathis: It’s good to either start a new project with a one-off or just do a palate-cleanser. It’s a good excuse to just create, and a lot of people kind of needed it. I know I did. Olivia: In the unstructured life that came after the structure of school, it kind of gave us a purpose that wasn’t a vague goal that was unlikely to happen.   Wesley: When did the idea of creating a comics anthology come about? Elliot: The project’s been kinda going on since 2014 or 2015 I think. We started having these meetings at Memphis Pizza Cafe where we brought in all these people that were interested in being a part of it. It was very fun and loose, no name idea, no nothing, let’s just get together, make comics, and see what happens. From there, we were breaking up into groups, making stories, come back every once in a while, have another pizza meeting, and then talk about what was going on.  Olivia: The name was probably the one thing we deliberated on for the longest amount of time. For the full three years. Mathis: You would think that a big group of creative people would be able to name one thing easily. Wesley: Is there an overarching theme in the anthology between stories, or is it a collection of non-connected stories?  Shane: In the beginning, we intentionally decided against having a theme. A lot of the anthologies we were looking at did have themes, but I figured since this is our first foray into this, let’s just see what we can do, put it all together, and let it be its own thing.  Elliot: I guess the theme is it being a mixtape of everything we’ve wanted to write comics about.  Some Paper Cuts panels from illustrator Robert Burns’ comic Wesley: I feel like comics in particular are more accessible to new career artists because you don’t necessarily have to be a master illustrator to make a good comic, since the narrative is just as important as the art. Does that make sense?  Olivia: Definitely. For example, Questionable Content is a webcomic I’ve been following for about ten years at this point, and when the guy started out, he sucked. You’ve watched him grow as the years have gone by, but everyone came for the writing and jokes, basically.  Elliot: Which is funny, because there are a lot of comics that are just gross to look at or neutral to look at, but the writing’s so good. There aren’t many comics that I know of that look really good, but you just hate reading them.  Wesley: Are there any dedicated writers on your team? Olivia: It was all very free, choosing how we wanted to put this thing together. There were people who decided to team up on one story, but there were several of us who did it all. Elliot: I think there are three writer-artist teams. There’s Angel Bonesteel with Rory, Chris Haley with Lan Pitts, who’s actually done some work for Boom Studios. And Robert Burns has a writer buddy, Tyler. Wesley: You brought the project to Kickstarter, which as of now has raised a little over $3,700 of its $12,800 goal. How else are you getting the word out about Paper Cuts? Shane: We’re looking at other things now, like ads we’re going to take out and press releases we’re going to send. Bleeding Cool emailed me last night asking me to write something in the first person for their site basically talking about the project and linking to other work. So I cranked out this article in three hours that went up a couple hours actually. Elliot and I talked about not milking the whole “MCA is closing” thing, but as I was writing, I was feeling really connected to the school and to our friends, so I definitely turned that up a bit.  Wesley: Speaking of which, how does Memphis College of Art closing up affect this process? Shane: We started talking about Paper Cuts late 2015, just under a year before the school announced it was gonna close. At the time, our connection was MCA, but we weren’t broadcasting that it was this MCA thing because we were open to bringing in other people from the community as well. But once the school announced that it was closing, there was this collective feeling of, “Oh, well we kinda want this to be a tribute to the school and the programs.” It’s definitely heartbreaking. Editor Shane McDermott is also contributing a story to the anthology—here’s a page from him. Wesley: But artists nationwide are contributing to this, right? Or is it just MCA alumni? Shane: There are 16 of us total, 3 of us aren’t MCA alums.  Olivia: And there are people living all over contributing to this even though we’re centered in Memphis.  Wesley: Is there another plan if the Kickstarter doesn’t reach its goal? Have you worked with any other agencies or organizations in Tennessee to get Paper Cuts out there? Shane: We’re not out to make money on this. If it made any extra money we talked about distributing it amongst the artists, but ultimately we just want Paper Cuts to exist as a physical book. We want it to be on bookshelves. There are other things we could do, like Amazon’s CreateSpace print-on-demand thing. Maybe get a grant to get it printed and then sell it in local shops or something. Part of the reason the Kickstarter goal is so high is, not only are we printing it, we have to get it shipped here from China, and then shipped to all of our backers.  Mathis: Sponsors and grants are cool and everything, but the real goal we want is books in hands. So instead of people being independent contributors and just covering the cost, we want people to actually have it. We’re making something we want to give to people. Money is cool, but even if we just end up giving it to 90 people, it’s like, I hope those 90 people like it.  Shane: I’m not opposed to just making .pdfs and giving it to everyone if the Kickstarter doesn’t make it. Then if people want printed copies, we could try again. Wesley: Anything else you’d like to add? Shane: I wanna throw some kudos to our contributors. I may have gotten the ball rolling in the beginning, but these guys were talking about doing this a long, long time ago, way before I said, hey, let’s finally do it. Especially after the MCA announcement, I’ve dropped the ball on this and it shifted to the backburner for me, but Elliot has kept it on track. He’s really the heart and soul behind the Kickstarter campaign. Olivia got her comic done really, really early on. It’s a 100 percent collaborative effort, we’re peers, and we’re all equal in this endeavor. Here are some very important links to check out if you’d like to support Paper Cuts: Paper Cuts Kickstarter campaign: http://kck.st/2ERLOV7 Project website: papercutscomics.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/PaperCutsComics Instagram: @papercutscomicanthology or www.instagram.com/papercutscomicanthology/ And, check out Shane’s post on Bleeding Cool here: https://www.bleedingcool.com/2019/06/15/comics-art-school-alumni-anthology/ About The Author Wesley Morgan Paraham is a Memphis native and University of Memphis graduate who spends most of his free time in his Midtown apartment playing video games with his partner. He’s currently DCA‘s PR+Social Media Coordinator.   Are you a home owner in Memphis, with a broken garage door? Call ASAP garage door today at 901-461-0385 or checkout https://ift.tt/1B5z3Pc

http://ilovememphisblog.com/2019/07/support-memphis-artists-for-the-papercuts-comic-anthology-project/