#but a small break to spend maybe the rest of the week working on getaway car won't hurt

[ranger-kellyn]

woke up to the most lovely comment on my fic getaway car and i'm just............On The Floor

[dudadragneel]

Hey again!

I'm sorry this sh*t cut again 🙃

This app hates me for real

Enjoy!

My dear 🧶, I'm sorry it took this long! I hope you'll enjoy it!

💜

🧶Okay so I’m thinking of y/n being on vacation with SKZ and her and Hyune using this time as a romantic getaway to spend time with each other type vibe. I wanted to switch up the dynamics with this one where he isn’t hiding that he doesn’t feel well and he keeps telling y/n and the others that he feels really nauseous and has a migraine but everyone just brushes it off. Then that night he doesn’t even eat much of his dinner and lays his head down on y/n lap because he feels dizzy but ends up throwing up everywhere and everyone realizes that it’s serious. Then they just go to bed and he takes a painkiller for the migraine and at first it works but the next day everything deteriorates and his head feels worse and he keeps vomiting. And there’s an emotional moment where he’s just crying because he’s really frustrated with everything and y/n hugs and comforts him.

A little angst 😌

SUMMER VACATION

The boys were on a little break in between promotions, a time when they wanted to do everything, from sleeping all day to going out.

This time around, they had two weeks off, no photoshoots or individual schedules for surprise content for STAYs, just freedom to do whatever they wanted.

You were on vacation from your job as well and Hyunjin wanted you to come with them to a little vacation house.

It was summer and being a little far away from the city would be good for all of you.

Since the trip wasn't that far away, this time you rented two cars to go, as it also would give you the freedom to go to the near town if needed.

The day of the trip was sunny and almost too hot, it felt like each of you had a sun of your own on top of your head.

Everyone was excited about the trip but one person, Hyunjin.

He wanted to have a small romantic getaway with you and enjoy some free time before both of you went back to work.

But his body did not want to cooperate with him. He woke up feeling strange, and lethargic, and at first, he thought that he was just tired, after all, he had just finished promotions, and he still haven't had time to properly rest.

He sat on the edge of the bed and felt a weird pressure in his head and a painful sting as well, signs he was at the beginning of a migraine. He took a moment before actually getting up, afraid that if he did so, he was gonna pass out.

When he deemed it safe, he made his way to the bathroom to take a shower and get ready for the trip. But on the way to the bathroom, his stomach began to act up as well, it flipped, making the contents slosh around and he felt a sudden wave of nausea.

When he got to the bathroom, he went directly to the sink and grabbed the edges for support.

He took a good look in the mirror and noticed that despite feeling awful he didn't look that way. He washed his face to properly wake up and spat out thick saliva. He didn't have the urge to throw up but he didn't want to swallow that either.

As he rinsed his mouth, the feeling of the cold water touching his lips gave him some sort of comfort and relief. He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths before entering the shower, as he was afraid he might get sick or faint.

The cold water did provide some comfort from the heat but at the same time, it bothered his already aching head.

Coming out of the shower, his migraine had worsened a bit so he went to ask Chan if he had anything for the pain.

- Chan-hyung, good morning...

- Oh, Hyunjin-ah, good morning! Are you done packing?

- Almost. Hyung, do you have any painkillers?

- Hm? Why? Are you okay?

- Not really...My head is killing me and I feel sick...

- Maybe you're still tired from the promotions and a bit anxious about the trip. Here, take these.

- Thanks, hyung.

He took the medicine with some cold water but the tiny bit of taste it left in his mouth made him gag. He took another deep breath in and managed to keep everything down.

Since the weather was hot, he put on some light, comfortable yet fashionable clothes and finished packing his bag, taking as much medicine as possible with him.

Just like always, you went to the dorm to help the boys finish packing and this time, make sure that each car had one cooler with drinks and food, otherwise, you were going to perish on the way to the house.

Arriving there you found out that, surprisingly, the boys were almost ready, different from the other time when you had to mom them before leaving.

- Hello, guys!

- Oh, y/n! Hello! Good morning!

- I see that we're better prepared this time.

You said smirking.

- hahaha yes!

- Where are the coolers?

- At the kitchen!

- I'll take a look and make sure we have everything we need.

- Okay! Thanks!

You headed to the kitchen and checked the two coolers, they had some fruit, snacks, and a lot of water, sports drinks, and juice. Everything to keep everyone hydrated during this trip, since the sun looked like it was laughing at you.

After that, you went to Hyunjin's bedroom and found him sitting at the edge of the bed, with earphones on.

- Hello, honey!

- Oh, hello babe!

He said, being a little dramatic as he got startled.

- Excited about the trip?

- Hm... yes and no...

- Hm? Why?

- I don't feel well...Like, my head is hurting, it feels like my migraine is working up and I feel nauseous...

- Oh honey. I'm sure it's just because you're tired. After all, you just finished promotions, this trip is kind of rushed.

- Yeah, maybe...

He was sure something wasn't right with him but he couldn't tell if it was just because he was anxious and it would go away eventually or if it was something else, but he trusted you with all his heart, so if you said it could be because he was just tired, he'd rather believe in your words.

- Come here.

You hugged him, kissed the top of his head, and took a good look at him.

The clothes he picked up along with the light pink hair made him look ethereal, you were always amazed by his fashion sense.

- Woah, you look amazing!

- You too, babe.

- Are done packing?

- Yep.

- Then let's wait for the others in the living room.

You both sat down on the couch as the rest finished packing their stuff and double-checked if everything was there.

You got the coolers and went to the car.

Since there were nine of you, one car had to transport 5 people and the other, 4.

The boys didn't want you to be uncomfortable and cramped during the road trip, so you went in the car with fewer people, with Hyunjin, Lee Know, and Felix. And in the other car were Chan, Changbin, Seungmin, Jisung, and Jeongin.

The place you were headed was 3h to 4h away from the dorms, which meant you'd be trapped inside a car, in the heat of the summer, for at least half of that time and no one was looking forward to that.

Lee Know was driving and you two had agreed you'd switch with him for the other half of the trip.

As for the first half, you and Hyunjin sat in the back while Felix was in the front with Lee Know.

The trip started with a nice vibe, the AC was on and music was playing, and everyone was singing and talking and just enjoying the view.

Hyunjin was also enjoying a little bit, despite his head practically begging him to ask the others to turn the volume down, because he saw that you were having fun.

He sang and talked as well, and even accepted a few snacks and a sports drink, even though his stomach wasn't that settled.

As minutes passed, that excitement started to disappear as the heat intensified and you felt like you were inside an oven.

Out of everyone in that car, Hyunjin felt the worst. His head was pounding, his eyes stung from the brightness outside, not even the sunglasses were working, he felt dizzy, the heat inside the car was making him feel suffocated and his nausea was coming back stronger than before.

- Minho, can you turn up? The AC?

- I think it's already maxed...

- Really? I feel like I'm melting back here...

You said, fanning your face with your hand.

Hyunjin closed his eyes, trying to protect them from the brightness outside and also trying to control his nausea. He grabbed a cold towel from inside the cooler and placed it on his nape, to see if he could refresh a bit, but none of it was working.

His nausea was increasing and he was starting to panic, he wasn't sure if he was gonna be sick but he was starting to feel like he couldn't breathe.

Without noticing, he started to hyperventilate, trying to catch his breath but along with that, his stomach kept doing flips.

He didn't know what was happening, he wasn't sure if he wanted to vomit or not, but he was sure he needed to get out of that car.

- Hyung, please pull over.

Everyone was taken aback by the sudden request.

- Is everything okay?

- Honey, are you alright?

- I don't feel good. I feel dizzy and like I'm gonna throw up.

- Okay, hold on.

Thankfully, there was a shoulder just a few meters away.

Lee Know stopped the car and Hyunjin opened the door to his side and sat at the edge of the seat.

You grabbed a bottle of water and went to his side. Before giving it to him you poured some of it on his nape, to try to relieve some of the heat.

- Here, drink some.

- Thanks.

He gladly accepted the bottle and took small sips, paying attention to the cool sensation as it went down his throat. He was thirsty and he wanted to chug down that entire bottle but he knew better that if he did that, he was gonna throw up.

- Feeling better?

You said putting a cold cloth on his nape and massaging it.

- Not really. I still feel nauseous...

- I think you're a bit carsick and the heat isn't helping.

You said as you continued to massage his nape.

- Maybe...

He kept his head up and eyes shut as he tried to take deep breaths and cool down a bit with the cold cloth on his neck. When he looked down again, it was as if there were waves drawn on it.

- Do you think you're okay to go back to the car?

Lee Know said getting close to Hyunjin and pressing his shoulder.

- No... just give me a minute...I still feel lightheaded...

- Okay. Take your time.

Lee Know stepped away to call Chan and tell them their situation.

- Hyung?

- Minho? Is everything okay?

- Not really. I mean, we had to stop for a few minutes because Hyunjin started to feel unwell.

- Is he okay? What happened?

- He said he felt dizzy and nauseous. We think he's carsick and maybe the heat is making it worse.

- Okay. There's a rest area a few kilometers ahead, we'll meet you there. No need to rush.

- Okay, hyung. Bye.

Minho got back to you to tell you what they were going to do.

- I called Chan-hyung and he said that there's a rest area ahead and we'll meet there.

- Okay.

You were still by Hyunjin's side, massaging his nape and fanning him, trying to provide some sort of comfort from the heat.

- Babe, do you think you're okay now?

- Yeah, I guess so.

- Okay, come on.

You helped him up slowly making sure he wouldn't feel dizzy. You held his arm firmly, in case something happened.

- You good?

- Yeah. Felix, can you switch seats with me?

- Of course. It'll help with the carsickness, right?

- Hopefully. Thank you.

You all got back in the car with Hyunjin now sitting in the front with Lee Know and Felix and you in the backseat.

Sitting in the front, looking at the road ahead, did help with his nausea a bit, he wanted to believe it was just carsickness but deep down he knew it was the case. His head was throbbing but he was too afraid to take any medicine now and throwing up right after. He just stayed with his sunglasses on and tried to focus on the road and also not die of heat inside that car.

In about 1h30 you reached the rest area and met with the others.

- Here we are. Let's get inside the store, it might be cooler there.

You got out, relieved to be out of that burning hot car.

Hyunjin was still feeling nauseous, not as strong as before but it was still there and he was scared to move and worsen, his headache or feel dizzy again. But at the same time, the car was too hot and that was making him feel even worse than what he already did.

He opened the door to his side and took a deep breath before getting out. He stood up slowly and leaned on the car for a few seconds before walking to the store.

- Are you still feeling dizzy?

- Just a bit...

- Let's go, I'll hold you if anything happens.

You said smiling and wrapping your arms around his waist.

Just like Lee Know said, the store was cooler and they had a nice bistro with delicious snacks.

You ordered an iced latte and a slice of cake, while Hyunjin's stomach twisted at the smell of the coffee and the sight of food, it took everything in his power to surpass a gag.

- Honey, do you want something?

- No...I'm not that hungry.

- At least get a popsicle then, to help with this god-forsaken heat.

- I'll do that.

He wasn't sure if that was a good idea or not, but he was feeling as if he was boiling so he bought a watermelon-flavored one, that much to his surprise wasn't as sweet so it settled well with his stomach.

- Is it tasty?

- Hm! It's not too sweet! Do you want some?

- Just a bite.

That was the first moment of this trip that Hyunjin enjoyed so far. For a brief minute, everything he was feeling was gone and he just enjoyed that little moment with you.

Everyone finished their meals, went to the bathroom, and then back to the cars.

Just like agreed earlier, you were driving to the summer house.

Hyunjin sat on the front, to prevent that awful nausea from coming back and Lee Know and Felix were in the backseat.

The ride was not as cheerful as the beginning because the heat was practically unbearable and not even the AC was enough and they had little fans as well, you were all close to ducking your head inside the cooler.

Hyunjin kept his eyes focused on the road as his nausea started to build up again, his stomach gurgled and sent an air bubble up his throat, he brought his hand to his mouth to surpass what ended up being a wet burp, and it almost made him gag.

- Hey, babe, are you alright?

You said putting your hands on his leg.

- Yeah, I mean, the nausea is still lingering around...

He answered grabbing your hand and squeezing it. You squeezed it back reassuring him you were there.

- Do you want us to pull over again?

- No...I don't think so...

- Babe, it's okay if we stop again if you're feeling carsick...

- No, I'm fine...I just feel awful and I wanna rest.

You were a bit taken aback by how he said that but you just brushed it off as him being uncomfortable with the heat and getting irritated.

The last half of the road trip was a lot quieter compared to the first one. The radio was on, but barely audible, Felix had fallen asleep, Lee Know was on his phone and Hyunjin kept his hands on his head, starting to throb in pain.

In about an hour, you arrived at the vacation house. It was just an hour, but to Hyunjin felt like three.

He kept his eyes closed for the rest of the trip and when he opened them again, he felt a little dizzy, taking in all the information.

You got out of the car first and went to help Felix and Lee Know to take the bags from the trunk.

Hyunjin stepped out of the car and leaned on it for a while, both hands on his knees for support, as his head spun from the movement and his stomach flipped.

- Hey, Hyunjin-ah, are you okay?

Lee Know asked as he passed by the younger boy to get more stuff out of the car.

- I felt lightheaded and nauseous...

- It's just the carsickness, you'll feel better in a while.

- Yeah...

Hyunjin took deep breaths and made sure he wasn't going to pass out before walking to the house.

Entering the house, everyone was amazed by how beautiful and cozy it was. It had a cooling system, which meant it felt heavenly inside and there was a huge pool outside, just waiting for them.

They went to their rooms just to open their bags and put on swimsuits and jump right into the pool.

You went to your and Hyunjin's bedroom and also wore your swimsuit and got to the pool area.

- Babe, you're not coming?

- Hm? Go ahead, I'll go to the bathroom first.

- Okay.

You left and met with the others at the pool, and they had already started a barbecue. Chan was grilling the meat while the others played in the pool, so you decided to help Chan for a while making some fresh drinks for everyone.

After a few minutes, Hyunjin also came down to the pool and lay down on the sun lounger.

- Hey honey, is everything okay?

- Yeah. And you, are enjoying the pool?

- Not yet, I'm helping Chan with the food. Let me help you put on sunscreen.

You sat behind him on the lounger and applied sunscreen on his back, the cool sensation from the lotion felt amazing on his skin, and your touch helped him feel a little bit better. You asked him to turn around and applied it on his face, he scrunched his nose making the cutest expression and you cupped his face in your hands and kissed him.

- Why are you so cute?

- I just am.

He said giggling and kissing you back. Seeing that you thought that he was just carsick and was now feeling better. And Hyunjin also thought the same so he decided to enjoy the time outside.

He didn't go into the pool because, apart from being afraid of getting sick, he felt drained from the trip, so he stayed on the lounger, just enjoying the cool wind.

You got into the pool and played with the boys a little, and it made Hyunjin happy to see you having fun. He was feeling bad but seeing you happy made him happy as well.

When Chan was done grilling the meat, he called the boys to eat before going into the pool again.

You sat with Hyunjin on the lounger after grabbing a plate.

- Honey, you're not gonna eat?

- I'm not that hungry...

- Just a little bite? The meat is delicious, you'll like it.

You said smiling and pointing the meat towards his mouth. Hyunjin didn't want to eat anything but he didn't want you to be sad, after asking so cutely. He started to chew and immediately regretted accepting the bite, the meat was rather chewy, which usually he wouldn't mind, but today that was setting his stomach off. Each chew was a challenge, the meat was losing its taste in his mouth but he couldn't swallow. When he finally managed, he prayed that he didn't gag or get nauseous and that prayer was heard.

After 40 minutes, everyone was back in the pook and now Lee Know was in charge of the meat, while Chan got to have fun with the kids.

Hyunjin was still in the lounge, enjoying the sunlight as he watched you play in the pool. But the smell of the barbecue was starting to get too much and each breath in made his stomach twist, nausea building up intensely.

He was able to suppress a gag and got up from his place.

- Hyung, I don't feel good. I'm feeling nauseous, I'm gonna go inside.

Hyunjin said putting a hand on his stomach.

- Okay. Try to rest a little, maybe you're still feeling unwell from the car ride.

Hyunjin went up to your bedroom to rest.

He found some Dramin pills and took them to see if they'd help with that horrible nausea and lay down on the bed.

In the beginning, he couldn't get comfortable because of how hot it was even with the ac on and straight on him. He tried to scroll through his phone to distract himself but the migraine just kept getting worse and the brightness from the phone screen was making his eyes sting.

He put his phone to the side and just shut his eyes and tried to focus on his breathing to see if he could relax a bit and also help with the nausea. Within a few minutes, he was fast asleep.

Back in the pool, the boys were asking where Hyunjin was since they were too focused on the game before and didn't notice him leaving.

- Lee Know-hyung, where is Hyunjin?

- He went back to his bedroom, and he said he was still feeling nauseous. I think he is still a bit car sick.

The boys were a little worried but they all thought it was just carsickness so they imagined that some rest should make him feel better.

You went back inside to check on him and went up to your bedroom. You found him sleeping soundly, so you tip-toed yourself into the room, closed the curtain, and left. Thankfully, he didn't even flinch.

You went back to the pool with the boys and told them he was sleeping and they were relieved to see that he was getting better from the ride.

You decided to let Hyunjin rest and enjoyed the pool for the rest of the day with the other members.

Hyunjin slept soundly for about 3 hours, he didn't move an inch from his initial position in bed.

When he woke up, he noticed the curtains had been closed and the room felt a lot more cozy that way. It was a feeling he wanted to enjoy but his body had other plans.

His stomach was still gurgling and turning and his head was pounding, he felt like there was a tsunami inside his stomach and someone hammering his head. He cursed under his breath that the medicine only made him sleep, but didn't work with the nausea, even though it was a medication for nausea, and now he was starting to panic

"If this isn't working, then what am I gonna take?"

He thought to himself as the nausea kept growing stronger. He carefully lay on his back, as his stomach revolted.

The movement, as minimum as it was, made his head throb and he felt dizzy, he covered his eyes with one arm and rested his other hand on his stomach, as he swallowed the thick saliva that filled his mouth.

His stomach kept doing flips and sloshing the little amount he ate during the day around, he felt it wanting to go up his throat so he started to swallow convulsively.

He kept on swallowing thick saliva, while his hand gripped the fabric of his shirt tightly in an attempt to control what he was feeling.

He repeated the pattern until his mouth went numb and the nausea finally subsided. He felt relief wash over his body, but his head still throbbed, not giving him a break, and he kept his eyes shut, not daring to open them and worsen his already killer migraine.

He grew exhausted from the whole process of controlling his nausea and dealing with his migraine without medication that he fell asleep again without notice. And like that, he stayed until noon.

After playing in the pool the whole day, everyone was ready for a well-deserved bath to have dinner and hit the bed.

While the others went to their rooms to take their showers, you went to your bedroom to wake Hyunjin up.

When you entered the room, he was sleeping like a baby, and you didn't want to wake him up but he needed to take a bath and eat something.

You carefully approached him and sat on the bed beside him, and gently caressed his arm, not to startle him awake.

- Honey, wake up...

You said softly.

- Hm? Babe? What time is it?

He said barely opening his eyes, voice raspy.

- About 7 PM. Are you okay?

- Not really... I took a Dramin pill earlier thinking it would help with the nausea but it just made me sleep. I still feel nauseous and my migraine is killing me...

- Oh babe, I'm sure you're just tired from the ride and the weather. Why don't you take a shower so we can head down and have dinner?

- I will...

He took your advice and went to the bathroom to take a shower, while you organized your bags.

Hyunjin was feeling awful, the nausea just wouldn't go away, and his head was throbbing to the point where he was considering keeping his eyes shut the whole time. He thought maybe a shower would make him feel at least, less hot and less icky.

He took a rather cold shower, considering how hot it was outside, but the low temperature of the water was making his head pound again. He felt as if someone was squeezing his head on both sides and that made him incredibly dizzy, his vision got blurred so he sat down, afraid of passing out.

He took deep breaths to make sure he wasn't feeling lightheaded before standing up again.

When he was up on his feet again, his stomach gurgled, as if telling him that staying sit would've been a wiser choice.

He took deep breaths once again and finished his bath before anything could happen.

When he entered the shower he was hoping it would be a refreshing one, that would help him relax but he got out still feeling miserable, and it didn't help with the heat as well. He put on some light clothes and went to the bedroom.

You entered the shower right after him and he sat on the bed, too afraid to lay down and feel even more nauseous.

You two headed downstairs for dinner, and the boys had already cooked a delicious summer meal with cold drinks.

You sat beside Hyunjin at the table and put on your plate.

He hesitantly grabbed a few things that looked like would settle down well and put on his plate.

You were chatting about the day and how exhausted you were from the road trip, planning what to do the next day, etc.

Hyunjin was rather quiet throughout, eating slowly. He took small amounts and was chewing slowly, every bite made his stomach gurgle, and swallowing the food was a challenge.

After one more bite, he felt his stomach act up a little more so he put his chopsticks down and sat back on his chair.

- Are you done, love?

- Yeah...I'm not that hungry...

- Okay, sweetie.

You said kissing him on the cheek.

You finished eating and helped the others organize the table and do the dishes while Hyunjin just sat on the couch, waiting for you.

You went to the living room with the others and sat beside him.

- Babe, can I lay on your lap? I feel dizzy...

- Really? Of course, honey. Come here.

You said tapping on your legs.

He lay down and you started to stroke his hair and his arm.

The tv was on, everyone was dozing off every once in a while, and you continued to play with Hyunjin's hair. He seemed comfortable from your point of view, but in reality, he was feeling miserable.

As he lay on your lap, his dizziness wasn't quite going away, even though he was lying down, the room was spinning as if he was standing up, not even keeping his eyes closed was helping. His whole body felt weird because he kept switching between feeling cold and hot, but he didn't have a fever.

And the turmoil in his stomach was growing stronger by the second. He could feel its content sloshing around and threatening to make its way up.

He felt something creeping up his chest and his mouth flooded with saliva, he did his best to swallow it down without moving from your lap as he was afraid that any movement would just make him vomit. He squeezed his hands as he swallowed convulsively until his mouth felt numb.

At first, it worked, but moments later he felt it again, only this time his mouth wasn't filled with saliva. He felt an air bubble coming up, it made him feel choked so he decided to burp.

But his body sent him no warning of what was coming.

As soon as he burped, vomit gushed out getting on you and on the floor, startling everyone, including himself.

- Oh my god! Babe!

You said as he quickly got up from your lap as another violent stream made its way out, and you barely had time to hold his hair.

- Get a bucket and clean cloths! Oh babe, it's okay, just let it out.

He kept his head down as you held his hair and rubbed his back.

He spat out thick saliva and barely had a moment to breathe before another wave hit the bucket that one of the boys thankfully got in time.

Everyone was shocked by the sudden situation unfolding in front of them.

You kept rubbing his back as another wave ripped through him, making him arch his back and sway forward.

- Oh babe, you're doing good.

You reassured him as the boys went to get water for Hyunjin and cloths to clean up the mess.

He stopped for a moment and only spat out saliva before going silent.

You tied his hair and massaged his nape while your other hand grabbed his.

- Hyunjin? Babe? Talk to me.

He just kept his head down, completely silent, it was as if the whole world had lost its sounds.

- Babe? Look at me. Hey, look at me.

You said as you gently lifted his face only to see tears flowing down his cheeks.

- Honey! What's wrong? Why are you crying?

He just turned the other way as he brought a hand to wipe off the tears from his eyes.

At this point, you were getting seriously worried about what was wrong with him.

- Hyunjin, please. Baby, please, look at me. What's going on?

He looked at you teary-eyed before he actually managed to speak.

- I feel frustrated! I've been telling you that I felt sick since morning and none of you cared!

Everyone's heart sunk to their stomachs.

- I told you I had a migraine and that I felt nauseous all day but you kept insisting that it was carsickness or just nerves from the trip. You didn't bother to think that it could've been something else.

None of you knew how to react to what was happening in front of you. You didn't know what to say to comfort the poor boy crying in front of you. You felt guilty for not paying enough attention, you felt guilty for brushing him off the entire day, you felt guilty.

- I'm so sorry. I'm deeply sorry, honey. I honestly thought it'd just go away. I'm so sorry.

You said almost in tears yourself.

- Hyunjin-ah, I'm sorry for not noticing and for not helping you. I'm really sorry.

Chan said kneeling in front of him, resting his hand on one of Hyunjin's knees.

Hyunjin just ducked his head again, crying harder and sobbing. You wrapped your arms around him and embraced him, trying to calm him down.

- I'm right here, love. I'm so sorry. Please, stop crying. You're gonna make yourself feel sick again.

The more he cried, the more he felt nauseous as he kept swallowing saliva. He didn't have time to escape from your embrace before his stomach sent its content rapidly up his throat.

He gagged as a thick stream of vomit gushed out of his mouth onto your lap, soiling both your clothes.

- Oh my god!

The boys exclaimed as they scattered around to grab more cloths for you and Hyunjin.

- I-I'm sorry-

Hyunjin said between sobs and hiccups before another wave ripped through him but this time he was able to get the bucket in time.

- It's okay, babe. Don't worry. Just get everything out.

The boys handed you a cloth so you could wipe off most of the mess while Hyunjin continued to throw up next to you.

You kept rubbing his back and giving him little kisses, trying to give him some comfort.

He gagged wetly one last time but only bile and thick saliva came out, indicating his stomach was empty.

Chan came back with a bottle of cold water so Hyunjin could rinse his mouth and get rid of that putrid taste in his mouth.

- Honey, how are you feeling?

- Gross...and my migraine is worse than before...I feel lightheaded.

- Okay. Why don't we go take a shower? Sounds good to you?

- Yeah...

- Can you stand?

- No, I feel like I'm gonna pass out...

Chan made his way to Hyunjin and put one of his arms across his shoulder while his other arm wrapped around the younger boy's waist.

- Hyung will take you to the bathroom, okay? We'll go slowly so you won't get dizzy, alright?

- Hmm

Hyunjin barely had his eyes open because of how much his head was pounding.

- Y/n, go take your shower. We'll take care of him.

- Thank you, guys.

Chan made his way up with Hyunjin, while you went to your bedroom to take a shower as well and the other boys proceeded to clean the living room.

Chan thanked heavens this house had bathtubs in the bathrooms or else it would be difficult for Hyunjin to shower in his condition.

- Hyunjin-ah, how are you feeling now?

- Dizzy...and tired...

- Okay. I will wash your hair for you, alright?

- Thanks, hyung...I'm sorry...

- No. We're the ones who should be apologizing for not taking your complaints seriously. I'm sorry. Get in the bathtub, the quicker we shower the quicker you'll get to rest.

- Okay...

Hyunjin sat down in the bathtub and Cham turned on the water, lukewarm, so as not to make him cold or make him feel even worse because of the heat outside.

- How's the water?

- Good...

Hyunjin said, voice raspy from the strain earlier.

Chan proceeded to wash his hair, very carefully and gave him a little massage to help with the migraine and relaxation as well.

- Hyung...

- Hm? What is it? Are you feeling sick again?

- No... Do you think y/n is mad at me?

- Why would they?

- Because I threw up on them and because of all the things I said...

- No. They are not. Y/n would never be mad at you for that. Just relax.

Hyunjin didn't know exactly what he was feeling, frustration because no one listened to him all day or anger because he didn't mean to act like that towards you and the members.

He covered his face, letting out a heavy sigh and a choked sob.

- Hey, hey. Stop that. It'll be okay, don't worry, alright? Do you trust me?

- Yes.

- Good. Now just relax.

Chan finished washing his hair and rising it and made sure the boy was okay to finish his shower alone.

- Are you feeling okay to be alone here?

- Yeah. I'm good.

- I'll be right outside, okay? If you start feeling unwell, just call me, alright? I won't close the door.

Chan went into the bedroom and stayed on the bed while Hyunjin finished showering.

A few minutes later, the sick boy came out looking flushed and tired.

- You good?

- Hhmm. My head hurts and I'm tired...

- Y/n is still showering so let me dry your hair.

Chan blow-dried Hyunjin's hair and applied one of the boy's favorite products to make it look healthy, especially given the fact that it was pink.

Hyunjin thanked his hyung for the help and went to his bedroom.

He sat down at the edge of the bed and waited for you to come out of the shower.

You were met with a tired-looking boy with fluffy cotton candy pink colored hair sitting on the bed, eyes puffy indicating that he'd been crying.

- Hey, honey. Did you manage to take a shower?

You said softly, placing the towel on the chair and sitting beside him.

- Yes...Chan hyung helped me...

- Are you feeling a little better?

- Not really...babe, I'm sorry for the way I acted earlier...

- There's no need to apologize, honey. I'm the one who should be sorry for brushing you off the whole day. I'm sorry.

You said, tucking his hair behind his ear to get a closer look at his face before kissing him and pulling him into your embrace.

He hugged you back, burying his head in your chest.

- Honey, do you think you can stomach a light smoothie? Just so you can take something for your migraine?

- Maybe... I don't know...

- I'll put very little sugar in it.

- Okay

You went downstairs to make him the smoothie and went back up.

- Here.

- Thank you.

He took small sips, very carefully so as not to upset his stomach any further.

- Hmm! It tastes good! Thank you!

- Really?

- Yeah! It's not sweet but it tastes very good.

- I'm glad you liked it! And your stomach? Is it accepting it well?

- Yeah. I don't feel nauseous.

- Great! Do you think you can stomach some medicine?

- Yep.

You gave him some painkillers to help with his migraine and he gladly took them. And thankfully his stomach accepted them as well.

You two decided to watch some tv while he took his time to drink the smoothie as slowly as possible so as not to trigger his stomach.

After about an hour, he had already drunk the entire smoothie and was starting to get sleepy.

- Babe, how are you feeling?

- My stomach doesn't feel that nauseous and my head feels better.

He said giving you a cute smile.

- Thank god. Let's sleep, shall we? Come here.

You said opening your arms as he gladly lay his head to rest on your chest, you stroking his hair while he drifted off to sleep.

You were thankful that after such a tiring day for him, he managed to fall asleep without any more incidents.

The night went on smoothly, you could hear the crickets outside and the weather was cool and a little windy, much deserved after such a scorching day.

You woke up around 7 AM, the house was quiet, indicating that the other boys were still in deep sleep. During the night Hyunjij went to his side of the bed and you kept lightly stroking his hair throughout.

You looked to the side and he was still fast asleep, didn't even flinch when you moved a little in the bed. You thought that what happened yesterday was just a malaise and that he was okay. But you soon discovered that wasn't the case.

You went back to sleep but just a few minutes later Hyunjin jumped out of bed.

As he was sleeping he started to feel something revolting in his stomach, it grew from an uneasiness to an unbearable nausea that just kept growing. He felt the hot liquid coming up his chest making him gag, he put a hand on his mouth and darted off the bed startling you.

He barely had time to reach the toilet as a strong wave of vomit ripped through his body hitting the edges of the toilet as well the bathroom floor.

You jumped from the bed and followed him to the bathroom, just in time to see the mess unfold before your eyes.

- Oh god. It's okay, it's okay.

You ran to his side and held his hair for him as he lurched forward as another strong thick wave of pale vomit gushed out of his mouth hitting the toilet water with a sickening sound.

- Oh, babe. I'm right here.

You rubbed his back in circles while your other hand kept holding his hair.

Another wave arched his back making him cough because of the strain and made him sway forward, almost losing his balance.

You guided him to kneel down and once he was safe on the ground you went to get a hair tie.

- I'm back honey, let me tie your hair. Let me flush this as well, it's a mess.

After flushing, you kneeled down next to him and kept rubbing his back as he rested his head on his arm.

- B-babe...I feel awful...

- Oh honey...I know... it'll be better once everything is out.

As if on cue his stomach gurgled making him retch and face the toilet again before another stream came out. He barely had time to breathe as another stronger wave forced its way out, coming out of his nose as well. You kept rubbing his back up and down and giving it some light taps.

- Oh my poor boy.

You said as you got some toilet paper and helped him blow his nose, so some of the content and stench came out before making him feel sick again.

He turned his head to the toilet one more time as a stream of bile came out and after that, he was left spitting out saliva and gagging unproductively.

- Honey, I don't think there's anything left for you to throw up. Let's lean back a bit.

You flushed the toilet and helped him lean his weight on your chest. You kept rubbing his stomach and drawing patterns on his hand to help him calm down.

- Babe, how are you feeling?

- Exhausted...

- Do you think you can stand up to rinse your mouth?

- No...I feel dizzy...

- Okay, I'll get a glass for you.

You brought a glass full of water to rinse his mouth and he did so and then spat out in the toilet.

A few moments later, someone knocked on the door, it was Minho.

- Hey. Are you guys okay?

- Not really. Hyunjin threw up a lot just now.

- I woke up and noticed you weren't on the bed and I heard some noises so I came here to check.

- He was fine last night before we went to sleep. He slept well but then he jolted out of bed and got really sick. He even feels a little feverish.

- Let me help you guys to the bedroom. Hyunjin-ah, can you stand?

- No, hyung...I don't have any strength...

- Okay, hyung will help you, okay?

Minho placed his arms underneath Hyunjin's and slowly helps him up to his feet. Once standing, the older kept holding him until he felt grounded, you also by his side supporting some of his weight.

- Hyunjin-ah, do you feel faint?

- Just a little bit...hold on a minute...

He said blinking his eyes, trying to focus his vision and feel the ground steady underneath his feet.

- Are you good? Let's try to walk a little, and see if you feel faint again.

Minho helped Hyunjin walk but after 4 steps he felt his stomach flip again and hot liquid coming up his throat.

- Hold on...I'm gonna throw up again...

- Okay.

Minho turned around so Hyunjin was facing the sink, since in this condition kneeling him down again to stand up later would just make him feel dizzier and dizzier.

The young boy grabbed the edges of the sink and ducked his head as he proceeded to throw up one more time. Minho and you stayed by his side, holding him to make sure he wouldn't fall and rubbing his back for comfort. Given the ordeal from a few minutes ago, there wasn't much left for him to throw up.

You helped him rinse his mouth once again and wiped it with some clean cloth.

-Think we can go to the bedroom now?

- Hm.

He just nodded, he was too tired after everything that happened since they arrived at the house. Almost too tired, he didn't have any strength left in his body to even move and he felt like he was starting to get a fever.

- Hyung...babe...my body feels heavy...

- Are you gonna pass out?

- I don't know...

He just wanted to lay down and hopefully sleep again.

- Hyung will carry you, okay? Are you okay with that?

- Yes...

Minho proceeded to carry Hyunjin to your bedroom, really carefully so as not to make him feel nauseous again.

He gently settled the young boy on the bed.

- Rest now. Y/n, I'ĺl go to the drug store in a bit to get some things for him, okay?

- Thanks, Minho.

- Thanks, hyung...

Hyunjin said as he lay down and put a light cover on top of him.

You grabbed a bucket and placed it close to him, in case anything happened again, and lay down close to him.

- how are you feeling?

- exhausted...

- and your migraine? And your stomach?

- my migraine is killing me now, it's pounding like it's being hammered from the inside... my stomach just feels weird, not nauseous...

- Do you want to take anything for the migraine?

- no...I'm afraid I'll just vomit again...

- Oh honey...come here.

You opened your arms inviting him to come closer to you. You gave him an eye mask to help with the migraine and embraced him as he rest his head on your chest.

- I'm sorry for worrying you...

- Dont. Just try to relax a little, okay? I love you, honey.

- I love you too.

He said as he buried his head even more in your chest.

As you stroke his hair and drew patterns on his hand, he focused on your breathing and your heartbeat.

They were steady and calm, and he focused all his mind on those rhythms. They made him feel grounded and safe. He started to follow those rhythms until his breathing and his heartbeat matched yours, and when you noticed, he'd fallen asleep.

You gave him a light kiss on the top of his head, before continuing to stroke his hair and he didn't move an inch. You were grateful that he had finally managed to sleep and his expression looked peaceful.

Thankfully in a matter of minutes, it started to rain. The image of the rain, along with the sound of nature outside, rain pouring, leaves rattling, and raindrops hitting the window glass, that was all that all of you needed to take a proper rest.

The whole house was completely silent, everyone was sleeping, enjoying that moment of peace.

You were thankful for the rain and happy that the house was silent because it meant that these hardworking boys, whom you love so much, were finally resting well.

[winterwitch-trash]

"The calm after the storm."

Author's Note: Excuse the mini - break on this story. I just hit a major writer's block and I was not happy with what I had written so I kept going over it until it was perfect. So we're looking at 4 pages of pure fluff. Happy reading ladies <3

Summary: Rumlow is dead, and the threat posed by the HYDRA mob ceased. Bucky and Odette get away for a much needed holiday, where they get the surprise of their life.

Word Count: 1.815

Chapter Warnings: Absolutely nothing BUT fluff and sweet moments because we all desperately need them after our girl went through hell..

In the days that followed after Rumlow’s demise at the hand of Odette, Bucky and the rest of the Barnes Clan, kept on waging the war on HYDRA sympathizers. Word had gotten out that Brock Rumlow, the head of HYDRA was dead, so it caused quite a stir amongst the mob clans across the city. Some could say that this was a prime example of what awaited anyone who even dared thinking of crossing Barnes. Half of the smaller mobs that were operating in the city were contemplating their allegiances; most of them decided to side with the Barnes Clan while others would still side with HYDRA.

Odette decided to simply take it easy and just focus on herself. No need for her husband to worry about her going out, especially now that Rumlow’s supporters would be out for blood. She just couldn’t go through this kind of pain again. Instead, she would just work from home until this whole situation smoothed out. There was only one request from her that Bucky made sure to fulfil and that was to keep the innocent civilians out of harm’s way. Some would say that the awful predicament she had found herself in the past weeks would have awakened some kind of monster within her. But no. She just preferred to hold on to her humanity. And Bucky felt immense relief to see that she was slowly coming back to her old self. Sure, the scars still served as a reminder that he didn’t protect her, but she took it upon herself to show him that she was doing better day by day. Of course eventually she returned to her business activities, only this time she would make sure to take Clint and Nat with her. They were her friends so she was trusting them completely. Not that Bucky didn’t. He was the one to suggest them taking over her protection.  And they accepted without a second thought.

So for the weeks that followed, Bucky devoted himself managing devastating blows against allies of HYDRA, effectively making a statement that whoever dared cross the Barnes Mob would suffer grave consequences. That was enough for the smaller mobs to pledge allegiance to him… However Odette could see that this was taking a toll on her husband… And she didn’t like that. Maybe a small getaway was what they needed. Just the two of them. No interruptions. Just them, and a magical view of the Eiffel Tower or wherever she chose. Bucky was hesitant at first, not because he didn’t want to spend some quality time with his wife, but because he didn’t want to have any unwanted visitors…

“I know you want to be here and be in charge of the whole operation love, but even you need some rest…” She whispered kissing his jaw, as they laid there in front of the fireplace, just enjoying a long overdue embrace.  The brunette found himself leaning into her touch, contemplating on whether he should just take her away for the next two or three weeks. “I love you for trying to take care of me. Just give me until the end of this week, and then we can go wherever you wish. How’s that sound?” He proposed looking down at her fondly, a sweet smile briefly playing on his face.

Well, the idea wasn’t so bad, Odette thought to herself… “Of course. I have appointments with Dr. Raynor too for this week, so…” She finally agreed. As for the brunette, he kept thinking of the progress she had made over the course of the past few weeks. He knew she was doing everything she could to come back to her former self and it would be an awful lie to say that he wasn’t proud of her. Odette noticed how he was looking at her, and she wondered what could be going on inside Bucky’s mind. “Why are you looking at me like that?” She asked him timidly. Sometimes, it was  still hard for her to comprehend how he could take in her scars and not run the other way.

There was a simple answer to this question. “I love you.” He whispered tightening his arms around her.  Three simple words from him were enough to cause a small blushing crawl on her cheeks. As she stared up at him, she realized that this was what she missed the most; sharing loving touches in front of the fireplace. Why was it that in this moment she began wondering what it’d feel like to have a little girl running around?

 Such a thought warmed her heart… But she wasn’t sure if he would be willing to entertain the idea of starting a family given the kind of work he did… If his enemies were to find out that there was a little girl, they would do anything in their power to hurt her and he wouldn’t bear that thought… No. He needed his wife more than anything. Despite the horrific ordeal she suffered, she managed to turn things around, even if there were days that she was lost in her on thoughts.

“I love you too…” She muttered capturing his lips in a slow, tentative kiss to which Bucky was eager to reciprocate in the same manner; he kissed her back with no sense of urgency. But soon the need for air became apparent, forcing her to break away, snuggling against his side, while he ran his fingers through her long ginger locks, listening to her heartbeat evening out, signaling that she had fallen asleep. And he couldn’t contain his excitement for the mini getaway in a few days. She deserved it after all.

Over the next days, he made sure to spend as much time with the woman he loved, sharing lazy mornings with her, showering her with small gifts. Odette couldn’t get enough of this side of him. She also let him know that she appreciated everything he did for her. But deep down, there was an unpleasant feeling that nagged at her. HYDRA lost her leader, and there was no retaliation? Something didn’t feel right about this… But she didn’t want to ruin the good mood. After all, her husband had everything under control.  

And so, they found themselves in a cozy hotel suite in Paris, enjoying the most spectacular view of the city, and in the distance, one could make out the Eiffel Tower in the distance. Bucky was shirtless and asleep, while Odette took in the beautiful scenery, wrapped up in a thin blanket, a mug of warm chocolate resting beside her. 

The mobster soon stirred awake, yet when he reached for his wife, he was only met with an empty spot. Quick to throw a pair of black boxers, he soon noticed her figure by the large window, but she didn’t seem to sense his presence behind her; only when he wrapped his arms around her from behind, she grinned widely. “I didn’t mean to wake you up…” She trailed off before she turned to face him. This disheveled look he was sporting suited him so well… “Oh, you didn’t doll, don’t worry.” The man responded, placing his lips over her neck, causing goosebumps to erupt all over her body. “I never thought I’d get the opportunity to witness this..” She said gesturing to the scenery around them. Light sheets of snow and dimly lit streets made it seem like the place jumped out of some sort of magical fairy tale. “I promised you I would give you everything… And I meant it.” Bucky replied, cupping her face, drinking in her beauty.  Odette simply offered him a smile, unable to come up with words. The way he was treating her made her heart thrum a little faster inside her chest.

It was like they were living a second honeymoon. The rest of their getaway was spent with them locked in the bedroom, engrossed in the throes of passion, exchanging soft, explorative kisses, and when they were not pressed up against each other, they were enjoying the city, visiting museums and indulging the best food Paris had to offer. Until everything changed. Odette had exhibited symptoms of dizziness, nausea that wasn’t going away… Despite her assurances to him that it was nothing, Bucky was not taking any chances with it. So he arranged a flight back to Brooklyn, and immediately he asked for the best medical staff to be brought to the mansion. This had to be kept under wraps since he didn’t wish for the media to pick up on it. Odette was slightly put off that the mini getaway had to be cut short, but she understood. Had it been any other woman, she would have caused major drama. But not her, and that was what Bucky appreciated in her.

Seeing the couple back in the mansion alarmed everyone of course, but the doctors had explained that it was nothing to be worried about. Bucky didn’t pay attention to anything since he was quick to join his wife in their bedroom, curious to know what she had to tell him.

“You shouldn’t worry too much sweetheart.. You’ll get wrinkles if you keep freaking out like this..” Odette teased, seeing the agitation painted in her husband’s face.

To that, Bucky rolled his eyes. “You know I can’t not worry when it comes to you doll.. What did the doctor say?” He asked noticing the playful glimmer in her eyes.  She was up to something for sure, and he didn’t know how to react.

“I’m alright.. In fact I’m more than alright love..” She grinned, resting her palm over her stomach. Now, that gesture did not go unnoticed by the brunette mobster. “Um, doll?” He shot her an inquisitive glance, not daring to utter the words in fear of it being a mean joke. He did notice of how she was glowing but he never really thought much of it; he always believed that it was the result of her beauty routines that she performed from time to time.

But no… It was a different kind of glow.

“The doctor said that we are in perfect health…” She trailed off, not wanting her bubbling emotions to cloud her voice. “We..?” He enquired further, until she nodded, a stray tear flowing down her cheek. “I’m pregnant…” She affirmed, before she felt his lips pressing against hers. “You’ve made me the happiest man on this earth.. You and our little princess in there…” He whispered, trailing kisses across her features and down to her stomach, the sweetest words leaving his mouth. “I love you already little one..” He muttered before pulling his wife into his arms, feeling the happiest he’s ever been.

“We love you too daddy…” Odette grinned back, laying in his arms content. Bucky was going to be the most loving father… She was sure of it.

@world-of-aus It's so fluffy I wanna die. I want to hear your thoughts on the chapter now it's complete.

[triscribe]

I have been working my way through the Alternate Living Arrangements and having a wonderful time, but if I am allowed to ask about one thing on the WIP list, I would love to know more about the Thief!Harry AU 💗

- Katheth86 (Chocoduckie86)

Aha, you're the one who's been leaving me a bunch of comments lately! Many thanks, my new friend.

So this would be the AU where, a couple of years before canon, a pair of burglars rob Number Four Privet Drive, and in the process discover a scrawny kid locked in the cupboard beneath the stairs, whom they end up stealing as well. A few forged documents later, Harry Potter becomes Harrison Tanner, and sets off on his path to becoming a chaotic good thief and trickster.

And because the second chapter is taking so long to finish, here, have a few upcoming snippets:

---

“You stole how much?” Ron asks, gaping with astonishment.

Harry grins, more than a little smug. “Final tally came to nine and a half million pounds, from twenty paintings and a dozen old swords.”

Neville’s too stunned to formulate a response, but the same can’t be said for Hermione. “And how much of that did your family keep?”

“Only the half mil. My godfather donated the rest to worthy causes - all the exact opposite of what that bloody author’s been throwing her money towards. And before you say anything, he’s been doing this plenty long enough not to get caught, so I don’t need to worry about the police knocking on our door any time soon.”

“Hmph.”

“Do you always steal that much?”

“Not usually, no. That’s the only big job I’ve really gotten to help with; most of the time it’s small things, like lifting wallets. Liza says she’ll teach me how to swipe jewelry at posh events when I’m older, and Rolfie promised as soon as my feet can reach the pedals, I can be their getaway driver for house burglaries.”

Ron slowly shakes his head, jaw still hanging slack. “What even is your life, mate?”

“Ironically,” Harry muses, grin turning into a smaller, more wistful expression, “Something out of a fairytale.”

---

Easter Break approaches quickly. Neville writes to his gran at least three times in the week leading up to it, seeking reassurance he’s still allowed to spend it with Harry’s family, and in turn promising to be on his absolute best possible behavior.

“Oh, but that’s no fun, Nev. Don’t you want to help us pull off at least one robbery?”

“Harry!” Hermione protests, but Neville ducks his head with a small grin, which was the real goal anyway.

Hermione’s headed overseas while Ron and his brothers are all going home for the holiday, but Harry promises to host all three of his best mates any time they want during the summer. “Yeah, alright,” the redhead agrees, looking a bit cheerier at the thought. “And maybe we’ll help with another nine million pound burglary, yeah?”“Nine and a half, thank you - and why not?”

---

That first day is spent inside the flat, with more storytelling, and some introductory sleight of hand lessons for Neville, and a few different children’s movies played on the telly to settle Rolfie’s sense of nostalgia. Dale shows up in the evening for dinner, takes one look at the extra child in the room, and loudly proclaims they are not stealing another one!

Liza winks at the boys and whispers that he’ll come around soon enough.

[hobipaint]

A Story Told On Sand

summary: The setting sun gives time for Jungkook to cherish his family.

↳ pairing: jungkook x reader

↳ genres: fluff, like so much fluff, established relationship, slice of life au.

↳ word count: 1.4K

↳ disclaimers: none.

a/n: A completely self indulgent Jungkook fluff drabble written at two at night haha,, I was really going through it. Written for the @bangtanwritingbingo prompt no. 14 - watching sunsets/sunrises, and for @btscreatorscorner June workshop- writing from a member's POV! a massive thank you to @jikookiekosmos for making the banner for me😭 and a massive thank you to @vaekth and @joonscore for bearing with me because I just kept talking on and on about this in your dms lol.

Jungkook leaned back, eyes shutting close as he felt the breeze kiss over every inch of his skin. The warm sunset was only just spreading across the sky, a bright yellow turning to a scarlet - as if the sun was blushing at the idea of leaving the sky, it's lover. 

"It's nice," You sighed, hands resting over his as you looked at the sunset. 

Jungkook looked at you, smiling, and hummed in agreement. "I like this scenario, you know. A sunset, the kids are playing in the sand, and your hand in mine. My day is coming to a good end." 

You turned to face him just as he lifted your joined hands to his mouth to leave a small kiss. You smiled, with your other hand coming up to pull your hair to the side, and Jungkook remembered why he fell in love with you all over again. He looked at you, your eyes sparkling in the deep orange of the sunset, keeping his eyes locked with yours as he pulled you closer. 

Kissing you never got old. 

His lips softly settled on yours, the feeling of them feeling right. Your scent- an unlikely mix of mint, from his perfume, and chocolate, from baking with the kids earlier today- filled his surroundings - and he didn't want anything more. His hand clasped yours, thumb tracing small universes over the back of your hand - universes where it was only you, him and your family. You other hand languidly traced up his arm, curling behind the nape of his neck to pull him closer. He felt you smile, nearly giggle, and it was only seconds before the two of you pulled away and just laughed. It felt good to be here. It felt good to be with you. 

The setting sun cast beautiful spells over the waves that were splashing and playing around in the sea, washing them in shades of burnt red and gentle yellows. The glimmering swell of water that leaped over the sand had your children squealing in delight, running away from the wave. You waved them over, watching as they ran helter skelter to collect their sand toys before running the two of you. 

Jungkook spread his arms out as his daughter ran to her father, not minding the sand that stuck to her body as she leaped on him - squealing in happiness at being reunited with her partner in crime. You reached over to ruffle her hair, eyes crinkling as your son walked over and buried his face in your lap, finally exhausted with the events of the day. 

It was a vacation for you and him - time to spend with family. There were so many highs and so many lows in your daily lives that it was exhausting, even if you loved your work - and you both needed that break, even if it was only for a weekend. Now, as he watched the waves crash into each other and then end in bubbles, he felt that peace he had wanted. 

"Tomorrow, we will go back to the city. Right, dad?" Your daughter sat up and spoke to Jungkook, his hand coming up to caress the hair that flew wildly behind her, settling it behind her ear. "Yes, my bunny. We're going back tomorrow." 

"Good!" She beamed at him, and Jungkook felt his heart swell. She took his palm, and he couldn't help but be amazed at how wonderfully she had grown up - he remembered when he would walk her around with her clinging onto his pinky finger only, and now her hand fit in the palm of his hand, big enough to clutch his hand and swing it while playing games. "I wanted to show you a drawing I had made for you and mommy." 

You turned towards your daughter while petting your son's head, fingertips gently untangling the heap of curls in his hair as he slept soundly. "What drawing, baby?" 

"I made a big girl drawing. Teacher had said it was really good!" Your daughter beamed, missing incisors displayed in a beautiful smile that strangely reminded Jungkook of your own -upper lip quirking in a way that he thought only you could, till his daughter first beamed at him. The thought made him smile.

"Really? I can't wait to see it then, bub. We'll pin it on the fridge too!" You cheered for her, her eyes widening in happiness and surprise at the sudden announcement. She jumped onto both of you, nearly knocking her brother off his mother's lap as she squealed again, screaming to the waves in the distance about how she loved her family. "We will be here forever!" she said, happily clapping.

After a few more moments of excited babbling - including a certain confession she had received from a classmate ("I promised not to tell anyone, but I didn't want to hide it from you! He said he loved me!") Jungkook's shocked exclamation at his baby getting confessions, you laughing, and her defending her 'friend', she was peacefully dosing on Jungkook's lap. His hand went to softly pat her hair, humming a soft lullaby - the same one he had sung to her for years- for all the times she wouldn't sleep at night. 

Eight years, and she still paraded up to him at night to demand the lullaby, and Jungkook would simply cherish that time as he would caress her head, wishing her sweet dreams and tucking the blanket in. "It's to keep the monsters away, " he'd hear her murmur everytime, and he'd smile before returning to his wife and son in the next room, softly patting his son's cheek, kissing his wife good night, and falling asleep. 

Looking at you now - your eyes paying attention to the two year old that had curled up in your lap - he held back the sudden urge to shout in happiness like his daughter had. That's what he felt. Overwhelmed with happiness. He didn't believe that he actually got to live with this euphoria in his life. One look at the three of you made him feel so proud, so responsible, and so loved - he simply couldn't put it all into words. 

Your head came to rest on his shoulder, and Jungkook leaned his head over yours, hands finding each other. You squeezed his hand tightly, and sighed - and he understood you. This silence, this time - it all meant so much for the two of you. 

"Once we go back, we're probably not getting time like this again, are we?" You whispered, letting the words fly away with the breeze. 

"Maybe. Who knows, I'll whisk you away on a getaway next week?" He smiled, and though he couldn't see you, he knew you were smiling, too. 

"Maybe? What about our daughter's annual day, mister? Forgot so soon?" You laughed as you spoke, punching his arm playfully. "I guess my husband is turning old already." 

"Hey!" Jungkook said, trying to fake his anger even if he couldn't take the smile off his face. "I remembered it, of course I remember! I had to learn the ballet routine as well!" You laughed again, the sound familiar and known to him- his heart beating a happy beat. "I twisted round and round, over and over, and nearly ripped my pants."

"Mmmm, and I didn't see you complaining after this baby appreciated you." Jungkook watched you caress your daughter's hair, then her cheek, and settle on the sand. "You went for it all the way." 

"I would always go all the way for her. And for this pumpkin too." He pointed at his son, and you giggled. "And for you too. You're my world, you know that?" 

You raised your head to face him, Jungkook almost complaining at the loss of your body heat right near him. "And you're mine. You, and our kids. You're all my everything." 

Jungkook's eyes softened, pulling you closer for you to rest your head on him again. You leaned against his chest, and Jungkook bent down to kiss the top of your head before leaning back to bade goodbye to the sun. 

"I think sunsets look the prettiest, don't they?" You marvelled at the sky, lush shades of warm orange letting hints of blue peak through as the sky prepared for nightfall. 

I think everything looks prettier when it's with you, Jungkook wanted to say, but he lets the babble of the returning seagulls fill the space. His hands wrap around you, letting his eyes look to the sky once again, awed by everything around him now. This was all he needed. 

"I love you," he murmured, pressing another kiss to his lover as the sun set upon the evening. 

a/n: I'm not really sure if this would be drabble length or fic length, but I'd like to think of it as a drabble. Writing this was really warm and comforting for me, so I hope that it gave you a similar feeling. I'd love to hear any feedback you have either as a comment, reblog, or as an ask! Thank you so much for giving your time to my work 💞 love, hazel 🤗

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“Yeah, yeah… Love ya too, man.”

Eddie abruptly stops before he enters the changing room. Heʼd recognise that voice everywhere because itʼs Buckʼs. But the words he overheard make him uneasy. Love ya too? To whom Buck might have said it? The most likely answer is to Eddie but he’s right here and he’s definitely not talking with his best friend. It’s not Chim either because Eddie saw him already in the station. So… Who else? Albert? No, that’s just ridiculous. Albert and Buck are friends—not as good as him and Buck, obviously—but why would they talk via phone when they probably saw each other this morning in Buck’s apartament? It doesn’t make sense. So… Who is it then?

Eddie feels like someone just twisted his guts. Has Buck met someone new? No, he would’ve told him about his new relationship, he’s sure of it. His best friend has told him about reconnecting with Taylor and doing the whole “friendship without benefits” thing, for god’s sake. He would at least mention that he met someone worth dating.

It’s not very helpful or reassuring, though. Eddie knows it sounds bad but he doesn’t want Buck to find someone to date. Unless it’s him Buck would be dating. He can’t stand the idea of Buck spending his free time with someone else, kissing someone else, loving someone else.

Eddie’s very much in love with his best friend. He’s tried to get over with him by dating Ana. And it was a fucking disaster because everytime he kissed her, he wished it was Buck instead. So… It’s safe to say he got it bad. And he has to keep it under control because he doesn’t want to blow up the best friendship he’s ever had. Telling Buck he’s in love with him is not even an option.

He tries to suppress his jealousy and finally goes to the changing room. Buck’s already in his work clothes and he’s scrolling through his instagram; there’s a wide smile on his face. When he hears Eddie coming in, he looks at him and his grin gets even bigger.

“You’re almost late, Diaz.” He teases and Eddie can’t help himself but smile too.

“Almost late makes a big difference.” Eddie emphasises, quickly changing his clothes. Buck only rolls his eyes. When they’re both ready, they go upstairs and greet their coworkers. The blonde goes to the coffeemaker and he pours two cups of coffee—one for him and one for Eddie—and he hands it over to his friend. They sit on the couch as usual; their arms and thighs pressed together as if there’s any free space left.

“Uh, I’ve got news.” Buck says and waits until everyone pays attention to him. “TK’s coming to LA this weekend.”

“Wait, wait, wait. Do you mean the TK with whom you stole the fire truck and who you were flirting with?” Chim asks curiously.

Eddie nearly chokes on his coffee.

Was Buck really flirting with that kid from Austin? Sure, he noticed that dumbass and dumbasser hit it off very quickly but it wasn’t something unusual—Buck was so sweet and easygoing, it was almost impossible to not like him.

“I wasn’t flirting with him! I just invited him to LA! And besides, he has a boyfriend. Who is coming with him, by the way.” Buck explains; he’s slightly embarrassed, Eddie can tell, because his cheeks are more pink than usual. Again, why would he feel embarrassed if he wasn’t flirting with TK?

Maybe he was flirting but he just doesn’t want to admit that? Whispers a very annoying voice in Eddie’s mind. He tries to silence it.

“That’s amazing! Is that captain Strand’s son? You should come by the station with them, I want to meet them.”

Bobby’s voice pulls him away from his thoughts.

“Sure, I was actually thinking… Maybe we can have a night out together? As a team?” Buck suggests. “TK says he can’t wait to meet all of you guys.”

“Fantastic idea. I’ll ask him if youʼre bluffing.” Chim quips. Eddie has a strong urge to strangle him.

And then it hits him. Buck was talking with TK earlier, in the changing room. It was definitely TK.

The jealousy is eating him alive. Sure, Strand may have a boyfriend but is it really that big obstacle? Women were flirting with him when he was still married to Shannon; they’ve pretended not to see his wedding ring and ask him out anyway.

Oh, shit. What if he will be the witness of Buck flirting with TK? He’s not sure he can handle that. How will he react? What if he will finally blow up and say something he’s not meant to? He shouldn’t tempt fate and just stay at home instead of going out with the 118 and TK. He decides to gently decline the offer and thinks about a good excuse—he could easily use Christopher as a reason to not go with the team—and Buck would totally understand it.

When he finally opens his mouth to say something, the bell rings. Of course.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

The whole friendship thing between Buck and TK is bothering him so much, he can’t even fully focus on the job. He’s so distracted that Bobby asks him if he’s okay. He shrugs his shoulders and lies that he’s completely fine. What would he say anyway? That he’s in love with his best friend who doesn’t love him back and he’s probably into another, very cute firefighter? No, this is already pathetic as it is. No need to embarrass himself more. When they’re back at the station, he’s almost on the edge. He needs to find out more, even if it causes him more pain.

He quietly follows Buck to the kitchen and when they crash on the couch, he musters up courage to ask him about his relationship with TK.

“I didn’t know you and TK were such close friends.” He says, trying to sound playful, teasing.

Buck sighs heavily.

“Oh, come on, man, you too?” He groans and shoots Eddie kind of an annoyed look. “Yes, we’re close and it’s nice to have a friend outside of the 118. And we’re just friends. No flirting, no hook ups. Besides, I’ve mentioned he has a boyfriend who will be there with us.”

Eddie believes him; he hears honesty in his voice and it makes him a little bit calmer. He feels like he can finally breathe again and—

“I wouldn’t flirt with him anyway even if he was single because I think I might be in love with someone else.”

Eddie swears he can hear his heart shattering on a million pieces. He wasnʼt prepared to hear this, he wasnʼt expected to have a breakdown in the middle of a shift. Buckʼs in love and he didnʼt know about this. How? Who is it?

“What?” Is the only thing he manages to whisper.

“I’m in love with someone.” Buck repeats. It’s very quiet, unsure, almost fragile. Like he’s afraid of Eddie’s reaction, afraid of being open and vulnerable. Afraid of being in love.

It breaks Eddie’s heart even more because the only thing that’s worse than his broken heart, it’s Evan Buckley’s broken heart.

“Oh. Are you... Does this person know about it?” He asks gently, moving a little closer to his best friend. He feels like heʼs been hit by a truck but right now he wants to at least reassure Buck itʼs okay, make him feel better. Thatʼs what friends do anyway. He can have a full breakdown in his own house when heʼll be alone. He starts to pat his back lightly and after a while, he can feel Buck relaxes a bit.

“No...  It’s… Complicated. It’s probably best if I don’t say anything. At least nothing will be destroyed. I canʼt destroy it.” He hears Buck’s muttering. He understands him perfectly; sometimes not telling the truth is just the best option.

Eddie still feels jealousy, he envies the nameless person who Buck loves. He’s trying to shove down his feelings and only focus on his friend to cheer him up.

“You wanna come home with me after the shift? We could make pizza together and watch some movies with Chris.” He proposes. He realizes he said coming home—like it was their home. Not only his and Chris’ but Buck’s too. And it is his home; Buck belongs to the Diaz family anyway.

His invitation instantly lightens up Buck’s mood because he finally looks at him and there’s a small smile dancing on his lips.

“Deal. But only if you stay away from the kitchen, we don’t wanna call 911 to the firefighter’s house. You can wash the dishes.”

“Fine. Whatever you wish.”

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

The rest of the week passes fairly peacefully. They don’t talk again about Buck’s feelings and Eddie successfully pretends he’s not jealous. They joke and bicker as always so it’s fine, it seems like everythingʼs perfect.

It’s Friday—and it means TK and Carlos are coming. Buck has a day off and he’s picking them up from the airport and giving them a quick LA tour. Eddie’s working and so are Hen, Chim and Bobby. It’s a busy shift so they’re definitely not bored; Buck keeps them entertained between the calls—he’s blowing up Eddie’s phone with texts and photos.

Eddieʼs happy that his friend is enjoying his day off, he really is. Of all people in the world, Buckʼs the one who deserves it the most. He wishes heʼd be there with him.

» from Buck: dude, we totally need to take Chris to this museum of space, heʼll be thrilled«

Eddie opens another photo from his friend—this time itʼs Buckʼs selfie whoʼs standing in front of the museum and smiling. It melts Eddieʼs heart because Buck always thinks about Christopher, always includes him in his plans. Despite what Hen says, heʼs aware that theyʼre basically co-parenting Chris; he canʼt pinpoint the exact moment when Buck has become a second dad, it just... Happened.

» to Buck: iʼm in. so museum and sleepover at my house next saturday? i think i need to get my revenge after last time«

Buckʼs response is immediate.

»from Buck: you can keep dreaming, Diaz«

Eddie stifles a laugh when he reads the message. At least, heʼs the one Buck chooses to share even small things with. And at this moment, everything is alright.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

They finally meet at the 118ʼs favourite pub. Eddie went home after the shift to drop Chris at Abuela and change into something nicer. He tried once to say heʼs not going out with them but he quickly changed his mind when he saw the disappointment in Buckʼs eyes. Heʼs quite nervous, though. Despite what his friend said about flirting with TK, the doubt, the uncertainty is still there. He hopes he wonʼt do something stupid. Heʼs the last one to arrive and Buck spots him the second he crosses the threshold. When he reaches the booth theyʼre sitting at, Buck almost jumps out to pull him into a hug.

“Thanks for coming.” He whispers into his ear and Eddie shivers involuntarily.

Then, heʼs crushed by another hug—this time itʼs TK which is a little surprising but Eddie returns the hug. Carlos sticks to the traditional handshake.

“Nice to finally meet the famous Eddie Diaz.” He says fondly. “Weʼve heard about you quite a lot.”

Itʼs quite dark here but Eddie notices Buck blushing anyway. Itʼs cute, he thinks.

“I hope Buck hasnʼt told any embarrassing stories.” He quips.

“Your embarrassing stories are safe with me.” Buck says very seriously, placing his hand on his chest.

“Trusting Buckley with your secrets? Youʼre either brave or stupid. Or both.” Chim laughs, sipping his drink.

“Iʼm telling Maddie. She will kick you off the couch for at least a few nights.” Buck warns him. It piques Carlosʼ interest because he asks a question, looking at the other man.

“Wait, so Chimʼs with your sister? Wow, you guys are really close.”

“Oh, you have no idea.”

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

The conversations go as smoothly as the drinks they keep ordering. Eddie feels buzzed and content. Heʼs talking with Carlos about their childhood in Texas. He discovers that they have much in common; itʼs a very pleasant surprise and he feels like they will be very good friends. Bobby already called the night off, saying he needs to go back to his wife—because you canʼt say no to Athena —but Hen and Chim are still there and theyʼre singing karaoke alongside Buck and TK.

Eddie keeps an eye on these two; there was a reason why Judd called them dumbass and dumbasser. Buckʼs also slightly more drunk than him so someone really should check out what heʼs doing. And that is Eddieʼs responsibility. There is definitely no hidden meaning, no other reason to glance from time to time (fine, very often) at the scene.

Itʼs their turn to sing—itʼs Ed Sheeranʼs Give Me Love —and Eddieʼs confident it was Buckʼs choice. He notices how synchronised they are, how they keep sharing casual touches, how they laugh at each other, how they look at each other during the song—

And the jealousy almost throttles him. Because this is something Buck had only with him. Heʼs never been so touchy with Chim or Albert; sure, they have hugged many times but itʼs different with Eddie. Their closeness, lack of personal space was there from the first Eddieʼs day at 118 even when theyʼve been showing off to each other. Itʼs never felt awkward or inappropriate. It was easy, natural, kind of like breathing—something that people do without even thinking about it because itʼs just part of life. Because it was Buck.

Heʼs spiraling. He needs to go outside, somewhere where he wonʼt see Buck and TK together. It doesnʼt even help him that TKʼs boyfriend is right there next to him and he doesnʼt feel annoyed, threatened. He watches them with amusement in his eyes.

“I... I need to go to the bathroom.” Eddie says quietly and he rushes out of the booth before Carlos can say something. In the middle of the road to the bathroom, he changes his mind and goes out of the pub. He needs to take a deep breath, calm down and donʼt let jealousy take over him. Itʼs not like Buckʼs his boyfriend; heʼs allowed to be close with anyone he wants to. He knows that this possessive feelings and fear of being replaced, hurt is probably irrational but it still gets to his head very easily.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

He goes back inside after a while. He orders a beer and sits in the empty booth because apparently Carlos decided to join the rest on the stage. Eddieʼs grateful for that because he doesnʼt have to explain himself, he just can sip his beer in peace.

He doesnʼt notice TK coming to the booth, heʼs too lost in thoughts.

“What are you doing here all alone? Playing a dark, brooding hero?” He hears a very amused voice when TK sits across from him.

Eddie glares at him.

“Iʼm not brooding.” He scoffs. Heʼs definitely not brooding, heʼs just... Thinking. Trying to behave as usual. It would be rude of him to just go home without saying goodbye, right? And Buck would definitely call him to check if everythingʼs alright. Itʼs better to wait a little even if heʼs sitting alone.

“If you say so.” TK shrugs but then, he continues. “You know, thereʼs no need to look at me like you want to rip my head off.”

Eddie opens mouth to say something, to deny it because heʼs sure he didnʼt look at Strand like that but TK doesnʼt let him.

“Dude, donʼt. If looks could kill, I would be already dead when we met in Texas. Well, maybe it wasnʼt that intense back then but tonight you look like you want to strangle me. Thereʼs no reason. I like Buck but heʼs my friend. Just a friend.”

Eddie looks at him like a deer caught in the spotlight. Is he really that easy to read? He feels the blush creeping up in his cheeks; heʼs a little embarrassed because he really didnʼt expect TK to be so perceptive.

“I... How did you know?” He asks, his voice filled with uncertainty. He doesnʼt try to deny it anymore, TK wouldnʼt buy this bullshit anyway.

“Besides that I-wanna-kill-you look? ” TK laughs and then, he takes the water left on the table. “You look at him like the sun shines out of his ass. You were so focused on him that you barely noticed everyone else tonight. If I asked Hen or Chim about it, Iʼm sure they would say this is your normal behaviour. And you kept touching him like...” He trails off for a while, biting his lip. “You know... When I saw you and Buck for the first time, I was sure you two were together.”

Eddieʼs speechless; he’s mindlessly tapping his leg, looking at TK but not really seeing him. He’s silent for a few moments, but TK’s patient, he doesn’t rush him to talk.

“It’s… Complicated.” Eddie sighs heavily. He hasn’t told anyone about it but he doesn’t know if he can keep all of these emotions bottled up any longer. Maybe the fact he’s not entirely sober helps. And the fact it’s TK he’s talking to. “We’re friends. Best friends even. I… You know, he’s been there for me and he’s got my back since the day I arrived at the station. He’s the best friend I’ve ever had and I wasn’t expecting to fall in love with him. I don’t know how and when it happened but it just… Did? The thing is… I was panicking at first, I even tried to get over him by dating Ana. She’s—she was Christopher’s teacher. She was nice and sweet but I’ve kept thinking about Buck even when I was on a date with her. Even when I was kissing her, I couldn’t stop thinking about him. It’s embarrassing, I know.”

He’s thankful that TK’s not interrupting him, that he actually pays attention to him. He notices the resemblance between him and Buck. Both of them have a personality of a golden retriever and they tend to do sometimes very stupid and reckless things. But after all, they’re so easygoing and sweet, it’s very easy to love them. Eventually, he goes on with his confession. “You know, I was jealous when I saw you two because you’re awfully… Handsy. You can understand each other without even talking. I know you have Carlos and that you two are serious but… I can’t help it, it’s stronger than me. And I can’t tell him I’m in love, I can’t destroy our relationship. I can’t do it because Chris would lose him too and he’s already lost one parent. Besides, Buck’s in love with someone anyway.”

He ends his monologue and hides his face in his hands. He definitely feels better after saying it out loud but it’s still a little bit awkward.

“And here I’ve thought Judd calls you Hollywood because of the looks but now I’m sure it’s because of how dumb you are.” TK says boldly.

Eddie raises his head to gaze upon his friend. There’s a very amused grin on his face and he looks like he’s refraining himself from laughing out loud.

“You really have no clue, don’t you?” TK asks. “Sorry, I shouldn’t laugh at you but it’s so funny how oblivious and blind two people can be.”

Eddie scowls.

“Are you gonna keep mocking me or you’re gonna tell me what you mean?”

“Fine.” TK chuckles. “Have you ever considered that Buck might be in love with you? I know that he told you, not directly, but he told you about it. I guess you didn’t figure it out.”

“He didn’t—” Eddie protests without hesitation but he stops when recalls their conversation after Buck told the team about TK and Carlos coming to LA. He mentioned being in love with someone and not wanting to tell the person about his feelings but Eddie didn’t even think that he could be talking about him. “You sure… He was talking about me?”

He looks at TK with hope; he desperately wants it to be true.

“I’m sure.” The younger man reassures. “He’s in love with you as much as you are. Oh, speaking of the devil.” He mutters, seeing Buck going in their direction.

Eddie rapidly turns his head only to see his best friend settling down next to him. His face is slightly flushed, hair disheveled and there’s a wide smile on his lips.

“Dude, I know you’re into Texans but I think one of them is enough, don’t you think?” He asks TK playfully.

“Don’t worry, Eddie’s all yours.” TK replies, smiling mischievously and he winks at Eddie. “I’m sure Eddie’s more into cute, blue-eyed blondes anyway.”

And then, he flees out of the booth, leaving them both alone. Buck raises one eyebrow, looking suspiciously at his best friend.

“Blue-eyed blondes, huh?” He asks very intelligently. Eddie’s sure his cheeks and neck are red by now and it’s very noticeable.

“Y-Yeah. He’s right.”

“Interesting. Neither Shannon nor Ana were blondes.” Buck points out, his voice very teasing.

“But you are.”

It makes Buck blushing furiously and Eddie thinks it’s the cutest thing he saw this evening. Suddenly, he notices how close they are, how their bodies are pressed together, how blue Buck’s eyes are and how soft his lips are.

“So… You’re into blondes now?” Buck whispers, not tearing his gaze away from him, even for a second.

“Been into for a while now.”

“It’d make everything easier if I knew about this, I’d definitely do this sooner.”

Buck makes the first move and he closes the space between them. He gently brushes his lips like he doesn’t want to overwhelm him. But Eddie doesn’t want to back off. He’s the one who deepens the kiss, he’s the one who slides his tongue into his mouth, causing him to quietly moan.

“Do you think we could sneak off and go to my house maybe?” Eddie asks when they break apart, panting heavily.

“Dude, TK and Carlos are staying at my apartment, I can’t just sneak off.” Buck laughs. “I need to at least give them the keys if I’m not supposed to go back to my place tonight.”

“Then what are you waiting for? Just give them the keys and we can go.” Eddie pouts and he sounds so needy, it makes Buck giggle.

At some point, they get up and approach their friends who’re standing by the bar and ordering new drinks.

“Look who decided to join us!” Hen chuckles and she wants to say something else but she’s cut off by the Chim’s laughing loudly.

“I’m not sure if they are joining or leaving us.” TK smirks and Carlos nudges him softly to not to meddle.

“Actually, we were thinking about leaving if you don’t mind. I can give you the keys to my apartment.” Buck offers sheepishly.

“Just give us the keys, we’ll manage. You can go with your Texan.” TK says but then he adds, pointing a finger in Eddie’s direction. “But I need to meet Christopher before I go back to Austin.”

“I think we can arrange something. Tomorrow afternoon maybe?” Eddie suggests.

“Then we’re all set. Now, stop talking and get a room already!”

When Buck finally gives TK his keys, they say their goodbyes and order an Uber to Eddie’s house.

The ride is quick but quiet. They don’t really talk but the silence between them is not uncomfortable—it’s the opposite of it. They have to talk about their feelings eventually but they know they’ll have the time to do it. They enter the house and the second Buck closes the door, he’s slammed against the nearest wall. Suddenly, they’re kissing again; Eddie pushes his hips forward and it causes Buck to spread out his legs a little bit.

Eddie’s so glad Chris is at Abuela’s house because it means they have the whole night only for themselves—and they can do whatever they want to.

“Bed.” Buck growls when Eddie bites his lip and starts to unbuckle his belt.

“Someone’s impatient.” The older man teases.

“Said the guy who dragged me out of the meeting with our friends to have sex with me.” The blonde replies wryly.

“Just shut up, Buck.”

“Make me.”

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

Eddie slowly wakes up when the sun peeks through the curtains and shines on his face. His head hurts a little—well, heʼs not in his twenties anymore and he wasnʼt counting his beers last night—and he feels the weight on his chest. He needs a second to register that itʼs Buck; he sleeps very peacefully, completely nestled to Eddie. His headʼs on the place where Eddieʼs heart is, one arm around his waist; thereʼs a gingerish stubble on his cheeks and his blonde curls are perfectly messy. Itʼs a wonderful sight—and he wants to wake up like this every morning... Maybe minus a hangover.

He doesnʼt even notice how long heʼs staring at Buck like that but he doesnʼt really care. Eventually, Buck wakes up too and he raises his head a little. He seems a little confused but the expression disappears when he notices heʼs on top of Eddie and the manʼs grinning.

“Hello, sunshine.” Eddie says and he shifts a little to be able to pull his friend closer to properly kiss him. Itʼs kinda gross because they smell like yesterdayʼs beers and they havenʼt brushed their teeth but neither of them care.

“I assume you do remember last night... No regrets?” Buck asks. His tone is cheery, playful as always but Eddie can see the uncertainty in his eyes.

“Only one. That I was a coward for so long because we could have had it all much sooner.” He answers very seriously, looking directly into Buckʼs eyes. He wants him to believe in every word he says. “I know we hadnʼt exactly talked last night... But I donʼt want this to be a one night stand. Not with you. I want... More. Everything. I mean weʼve already been a couple for quite some time. You practically live in my house, youʼre Chrisʼ second dad and youʼve been my rock since the day weʼve met. We just... Havenʼt done the sexy part of the relationship.”

“Until last night.” Buck points out.

“Yeah... Point taken. So if you want to take it slow, we can take it slow. We can date like people usually do or you can already move in and take my closet, my bed and everything because youʼve already taken my heart.”

“If you think that your offer to move in is getting you out of asking me on a date then you’re terribly wrong, Diaz.” Buck teases and winks at his friend. “You need to romance me a little.”

“God, youʼre such a dork.” Eddie says fondly. He feels so damn happy and content because he can really have everything he wanted.

“You love it.”

“I do. Now, get your ass up. We need to pick up Chris from Abuela at some point. We have dinner with TK and Carlos later.” Eddie sighs because heʼd rather stay all day in bed with Buck—and maybe tell him some of the fantasies he had in his head—but the reality calls anyway.

“Are you sure you want me to pick up Chris with you? I mean, we donʼt have to do it together, I can go to my apartment and—”

“Buck. Iʼm sure. Itʼs not like we havenʼt done this before. I want to tell him about us too. I donʼt want to lie to him because I did it when I dated Ana and it didnʼt end well. Besides, heʼll be thrilled to see us together. Hell, he wants us together. He literally told me last week that I need to buy glasses if I canʼt see that you love me too.”

Buck looks at him with amusement and he laughs heartily.

“Heʼs a smart kid. And he definitely didnʼt get it from his father.”

Eddie scoffs.

“Youʼre really lucky that I love you that much because otherwise you wouldnʼt get away with saying stuff like this.”

Buckʼs smile is almost blinding.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

They get up, eventually. They go to the shower together to “save the time and water” but it turns into another long making out session. They eat breakfast (made by Buck) and they finally go to Abuela to get Christopher.

“Edmundo, youʼre late.” They hear in the second Abuela opens the door. Sheʼs a little surprised to see not only his grandson but also his best friend.

She notices the big ass hickey on Buckʼs collarbone thatʼs exposed because heʼs wearing Eddieʼs Henley and raises her eyebrow.

“Now I understand why youʼre late.” She smirks which causes them to blush. “Anyway, itʼs nice to see you again, Evanito. I hope I get to see you more often.” She adds and then embraces both of them in a hug.

“You will, Abuela, I promise.” Eddie says honestly. He wants to add something but he hears an excited voice from the hallway.

“Dad!” Christopher shouts as he goes to the door to greet Eddie. “Bucky?” He asks when he notices the other man standing next to his dad.

“Hey, Superman!” Buck says, kneeling down to hug the kid.

“I didnʼt know youʼll be there. Are you coming home with us?”

“Yeah, buddy, Iʼm coming with you.”

Christopherʼs smile only gets bigger.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

“Chris? What would you say if Buck were living with us?” Eddie asks when theyʼre at home. Buckʼs making Abuelaʼs famous enchiladas with Christopher (none of the Diaz siblings have gotten the recipe despite asking for it a countless times; Buck asked once and Abuela happily gave it to him) and Eddieʼs only an observer. He loves watching those two interacting, spending time together. He loves how easily Buck has stepped into a co-parent role, how fast and hard he has fallen in love with Chris, how good he is with kids in general. Heʼs amazed by it almost every time he sees them together. He wouldnʼt have found someone better to be with.

“Buckyʼs moving with us? Iʼve thought it wouldnʼt happen!” Chris replies. The corners of his lips are curling into a smile but before it breaks into a full grin, he asks. “But does that mean you are dating and we wonʼt see miss Flores or someone else anymore?”

Buck looks at Eddie with a mischievous smile and mouths told you, heʼs a smart kid.

“Yeah, kiddo, no more miss Flores or any other women. Itʼs gonna be only the three of us.”

It seems to be a very satisfying answer for Christopher—he just nods and goes back to adding all ingredients to the enchilada sauce.

When everything’s almost ready, Christopher goes to his room to change his shirt because he spilled the sauce on it and they are left alone. Eddie doesnʼt waste any time and comes closer to be able to kiss Buck. He thinks it may be a problem to keep his hands off his best friend but they will figure it out too. Eventually.

“I think I can get used to this.” Buck says when they stop to take a breath.

“To what? Cooking with Chris?” Eddie teases.

Buck only huffs but then he smiles anyway because cooking with Christopher is definitely on top of his favourite things to do. “Yep, definitely. He is my favourite Diaz after all.”

“Then Iʼm in second place I guess?”

“You wish. Thereʼs also Abuela and Tia Pepa... Maybe even your sisters.” Buck grins. “You have very strong competition.”

“I think I may have some tricks up my sleeve to change your mind then.” Eddie states and heʼs ready to show them to Buck but the doorbell rings. He sighs heavily. “Guess you just have to wait to see them then.”

“Canʼt wait.”

“Hi Buck. Fancy seeing you here.” TK says with a very wide smile on his lips. “Iʼm guessing last night went well then.”

“Well... Yeah? Thanks to someone who was meddling just a little bit.”

Carlos rolls his eyes but he doesnʼt look even slightly irritated.

“Please, donʼt boost his already big ego, he was talking last night about changing his career to be a matchmaker.”

“Matchmaker?” Buck raises his brow. “Sounds interesting.”

“Carlos, we should really keep our boyfriends apart, itʼs dangerous to let them use their brain cells together. If they even have them.” They hear Eddieʼs amused voice and he appears right behind Buck. The blonde blushes at the word boyfriends. “But come on in, weʼre all ready.”

“We brought a six pack and a gift for Christopher.” Carlos adds, lifting up the beers.

“Oh, Chris will be thrilled. Heʼs already so excited to meet you two.”

“Weʼre excited to meet him too, Buck has told us so many things about Christopher, I feel like I already know him.” TK explains when they go inside.

“Bucky was talking about me?” Christopher peeks in the kitchen shyly. He sounds quite surprised.

“Yes, he did. And itʼs very nice to finally meet you. Buck couldnʼt stop talking about you. He didnʼt even talk so much about your dad I think.”

“Because my dad is very boring sometimes and heʼs all grumpy.” Christopher shrugs, looking apologetically at his dad. “Sorry dad but thatʼs the truth.”

“When did you become so sassy, huh? But I guess youʼre right. But... This is TK and this is Carlos.” Eddie introduces his friend to his son.

“And we know youʼre very interested in space so we got you a little gift.” Carlos adds, handing Chris over a package.

“Thank you.” Christopher says simply and puts it on the floor to unpack. “Whatʼs this?” He asks curiously.

“Oh, let me help you unpack it but maybe not here? We don't want to make a mess now.” Carlos proposes and Chris immediately agrees.

They go to the living room together and Buck sees with how much fondness TK looks at them.

“Carlos seems pretty good with kids.”

“He is. Heʼs fantastic. Maybe one day weʼll think about it.” TK replies thoughtfully.

“Oh, really? You two would be amazing dads.” Eddie says honestly, putting up the plates on the table. TK looks a little stunned.

“Never really thought about it too much earlier. But, anyway, howʼs my favourite couple? Because you two are a couple now, right?” TK eyes both of them carefully.

“Buckʼs moving in. Donʼt know when yet but Iʼm planning to make it as soon as we can.” Eddie announces proudly.

“Wow you really donʼt waste your time. So should we expect an invitation for the wedding next year?” TK laughs.

“... Maybe?” They both reply in sync.

“Well, weʼre doing it backwards. We started by raising Christopher together instead of just simply dating each other. So maybe we should marry each other soon. Iʼd marry him even now.” Buck states and winks at his boyfriend.

“Something tells me that the 118 would be mad at us for weeks. If they wouldnʼt kill us first for not inviting them to the wedding.” Eddie points out.

“I hate that youʼre right. They would totally kill us. But dinnerʼs ready and boys are probably starving so letʼs feed them first.”

The dinner is excellent, the conversation goes smoothly and Chris talks about his gift—an International Space Station Lego set—with so much excitement, they donʼt even dare to interrupt him. Buck and TK even offer to help him build it later. They eat a dessert and then, Eddie and Carlos settle on the couch, beers in hands and Buck and TK sit on the floor alongside Christopher and they discuss how to build the space station. Eddie canʼt tear away his gaze from Buck who looks so happy and excited to play with his—their —son and agrees to everything Christopher says.

“You two really fit together.” Carlos says quietly because he doesnʼt want to distract boys from work. “And Iʼm glad you were able to finally talk about your feelings. I must admit, I was pretty invested in your story when TK was talking about it. I really hoped you two would figure it out somehow.”

“Can you believe I was really jealous yesterday? I was sure Buck and TK were flirting and.. God, I was so mad at you for a second why you donʼt even react, why are you so cool about it. And... Yeah, I was stupid because I was sure he was into TK.” Eddie sighs because heʼs still embarrassed about it, he still canʼt believe he was so anxious that Buck might be in love with someone else.

“Oh, you probably havenʼt seen the way he looks at you. Itʼs really something. And TK was really invested in—and I quote—bringing these two lovesick idiots together. They were never flirting. Not seriously at least.”

“Yeah, I know... I... I really hope heʼll be happy with me. But Iʼve heard your relationship is getting more serious.”

“Yeah, well... We live together now so itʼs a pretty big step for both of us. We havenʼt killed each other so Iʼm taking it as a good sign. I donʼt know whatʼs next. Maybe a wedding but I need to be sure TK will say yes and wonʼt freak out about it.” Carlos sighs, knowing that TK may be still cautious about the whole wedding thing but he definitely wants to try it anyway.

“He mentioned earlier something about you two having a kid so I think heʼs taking it very seriously too.” Eddie reassures him.

They both look at his boyfriends who are completely focused on building a space station with Christopher and itʼs very heart-warming sight. “I donʼt think he would say something like that if he didnʼt mean it. Besides, heʼs a lot like Buck and I bet he loves kids as much as him. And I need to add that Christopher is not really a kid who trusts easily but he clearly has so much fun with TK. I wouldnʼt worry too much if I were you. You two really fit together too.”

“Yeah, we do. TK was annoyingly stubborn at first and he didnʼt want to admit that itʼs more than just a hookup. Now weʼre living together.” Carlos laughs, looking softly at TK who sticked out the tip of his tongue and visibly tries to concentrate. “I must say, this is a really nice trip. Glad I could meet TKʼs friends and just... Let myself relax a little bit. Something tells me ifʼs not our last visit in LA, though.”

“I bet.” Eddie hums in agreement. “You can visit LA as many times as you want to. We will probably visit you in Texas too. I have to properly introduce Buck to my family one day so we can definitely do a quick trip to Austin then.”

“Weʼll be happy to see you. Captain S—Owen—will be thrilled to see you. He was disappointed he couldnʼt go with us, he wanted to see Hen again and meet your captain.”

“Yeah, he was whining all the time since we told him weʼre going to LA.” TK adds suddenly. Heʼs still focused on building the space station but Carlos and Eddie stopped talking quietly and now he hears what theyʼre saying. “Mateo was disappointed too, he wanted to visit his cousin. Marvin? Or something like that.”

“We can organise something bigger so everyone can be there.” Buck agrees. “Eds, we should definitely tell Bobby about it. I donʼt care if itʼs here or in Austin, I can definitely organise it.”

“I have no doubts.” Eddie says fondly and then looks at their guests. “You shouldʼve seen him when he organised a Christmas party for us all with help from Athena. We were all working and our kids were so disappointed by it but Buck basically rescued everything. That was really amazing.”

“Really? You didnʼt even mention that!” TK scoffs. “But nice to know, maybe Iʼll hire you to organise my wedding with Carlos since youʼre so good at this stuff.”

“Oh, I donʼt know. Maybe Iʼd work with Carlos because heʼs so sweet and nice but you? I bet youʼll be a bridezilla.”

TK only throws at Buck a piece of Lego in response, followed by the laugh of both Eddie and Carlos.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

Itʼs almost 10pm when TK and Carlos decide to go back to Buckʼs apartment. Christopher already fell asleep but he managed to build the space station with Buck and TK and he was really proud of it, just like both of his helpers.

“Dude, your kid is really amazing. I mean, I donʼt remember the last time when I had so much fun—sorry, babe—and Iʼm really gonna miss him.” TK admits and thereʼs so much honesty in his voice, nobody even questions it.

“Heʼs gonna miss you too, if it helps.” Eddie tells him, grinning softly. “Both of you. But youʼre gonna see him soon. At least I think so.”

“I take your word for it.” TK warns him.

“Well, you can always face time with us.”

TKʼs face instantly lights up and he hugs Eddie.

“I will miss you too, Hollywood.”

Eddie only rolls his eyes.

“Hey, you two big saps, you will see each other tomorrow because weʼre gonna drive you to the airport before our shift.” Buck announces.

“Fineeee.” TK sighs dramatically. “But I think our Uberʼs here so weʼre gonna leave you alone. It was really nice to spend more time with you.”

“Likewise.”

They say their goodbyes eventually and when TK and Carlos are already in the car, Buck takes Eddieʼs hand and smiles widely.

“It was really an eventful 24 hours.” He says.

“It was. Now we only have to prepare ourselves for tomorrowʼs shift. I bet Hen and Chim will be insufferable.”

Buck groans.

“Ugh, they will be. Maybe we should be insufferable too?”

“Buckley, do you have something particular in mind?” Eddie asks, watching his boyfriend carefully. Maybe other people wouldnʼt notice it but heʼs Eddie and he knows Buck too well. He notices that mischievous look in his eyes and heʼs sure Buckʼs up to something.

“I have a few ideas, Diaz.”

“Care to share them with me?”

“Always.”

[the-witty-pen-name]

The Honeymoon Pt. 1: Friday

Lee Bodecker x F!Reader

18+ ONLY 

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: fluff, smut, unprotected sex, cursing, age gap (reader is around 28, Lee is about 45 now) 

Summary: Following the events of Deadbeat, Lee surprises the Reader with the Honeymoon they never had. 

A/N: This is unedited and if I miss anything I should include as a warning, please let me know!

Series Masterlist

“Are you sure they’ll be okay?” you ask, watching as the house disappear from view from the side mirror. Lee took your hand in his and then brought it up to press a kiss to the back of your hand. You sigh contently, letting yourself rest into the seat.

“They are in good hands,” Lee reassured you. “They’ll run around, tire out the sitter and be in bed by the time we get to the cabin.”

“But after that?”

“It’ll repeat until we get back Sunday,” Lee chuckles. “They won’t miss us,” he jokes, referencing the fact your two sons were much more preoccupied with the cartoon on the television than the two of you when you had headed out.

You smile, and you know it’s just a long weekend. You deserve the chance to relax. Ms. Hanlon was more than qualified and you knew you left the boys in good hands. It was your first time away from them though, and that tugged at you.

“This is long overdue,” you smile, shaking the worry from your mind and focusing your attention to the trip Lee surprised you with. “Two children and no honeymoon,” you tease.

“Maybe we’ll get a head start on a third,” he jokes.

“Maybe,” you grin, biting your lip.

The two of you got married quickly, and wanted nothing more than to start your life together that a honeymoon hadn’t even been brought up as a possibility. Lee had taken on a lot of extra shifts lately and only last week did he announce he was taking you on your honeymoon.

“I wanted to take you on a trip for a while, sweetheart,” Lee explained when he was showing you the pictures of the cabin after telling you. “We can afford it now, and you deserve a break.”

“Lee, you didn’t have to do this, this looks so expensive,” you trail off, but he presses a kiss to your temple.

“You deserve it, baby,” he whispered, and then pressed kisses down your neck. “Putting up with me.”

The cabin was picturesque and it took your breath away seeing it in person. The log cabin sat far back into the Virginian woods, and all the snow that encompassed everything remained untouched like a blanket over everything. The snow at home was an annoyance, gross from cars and pedestrians and it hurt your backs to shovel. Here, it was magical.

The cabin’s roof was covered with shiny untouched snow and the rails also gathered up small mounds as well. You almost hated to get out of the car because you knew your footprints were going to ruin the scene. Both of you were bundled up in layers of heavy sweaters and bulky winter coats, and must have looked silly trying to walk through the snow with your overnight bags.

Kicking your boots off on the rubber mat that was in the entryway, the both of you laughed trying to peel off all of your outer layers. Your hats and scarves were hung up on hooks next to the coat rack. Once you were both left in just your jeans and heavy sweaters, Lee insisted on dealing with the bags later, urging you to just leave them in the entryway.

The cabin was homey, and smelled like firewood and pine. The small stairs led up to a cozy bedroom and the bathroom. The first floor with a kitchen built for two and a living room stocked with blankets and a stunning brick fireplace.

“Lee,” you mumble in disbelief looking around at the living room. “It’s perfect.”

He wraps his arms around your waist from behind and rests his chin on your shoulder.

“And you hear that?” he whispers in your ear, and then presses a kiss behind your ear and then down your neck.

“No?”

“Exactly,” he replies and you can feel his grin against your skin. “No crying, no nothing, just us.”

“We should really unpack the food and put it in the kitchen,” you sigh, before his hands travel too far up your sweater. He pouts.

“I’ll do it,” he smirks, pulling you in for a kiss. “Wait for me upstairs.” You grab his and your bags of clothes and head upstairs.

The stairs led up to a spacious bedroom that was the whole top floor of the little cabin. You could hardly contain your excitement about being here that you hardly gave yourself a moment to take in the loft room. You quickly left the bags on the floor of the closet on the fair side of the room and then quickly stripped down to just your bra and panties to get out of the clothes that were wet from the snow outside.

The bed was covered in heavy blankets and pillows. Sliding under the duvet, you can’t help but grin at the feeling of the sheets against your skin. It felt so luxurious even though it was just a little cabin. You lay on your stomach and settle in to try to warm yourself up from the cold and you tug the blankets up to your chin. The cold felt like it ran right through your body and into your bones. The feeling of the warm blankets made a perfect contrast against your chilled skin.

Lee never thought he’d be able to pin point a time when he felt even more in love with you. Guilt would tug at the back of his mind, reminding him none of this was something he deserved. You and the life you made for him: the house, your two boys… how could he ever come close to giving you something that big in return.

He got the idea for the trip several months back. He sat at the desk in the back office at work, his eyes glued to the security cameras that were just fixed on empty hallways. It was one of his overnight shifts at the museum. He needed to let his eyes rest from the screens, and he decided to take a walk around.

He wasn’t ever one to pay attention or appreciate art before. He never had the luxury. But now, he liked to walk around the place when he could- gradually working his way through the whole building. He takes the same walk all the time, but every time he manages to find something different. The only sounds are the thoughts running through his head and the sound of his shoes echoing in the dark hallways. Of course, he’s thinking about you. You never complained but like him, you hate the nights you spend sleeping alone because of his work schedule.

He thinks about you, tucking the boys into bed alone. Then going through the steps of your own night routine and skin care, and how tonight he’s not there sitting up and already in bed watching you keep going from your vanity to the bathroom. You’d mumble to yourself, and get lost in the familiar rhythm of your routine while Lee is content to just look at you. You’d make fun at him for staring, but he doesn’t even care.

Wandering the hallways, he ends up at the information desk and notices, people left a bunch of catalogues and brochures scattered on the desk’s surface. He starts placing the brochures back in their proper cubbies and then gathers up the magazines to place them in the proper baskets. Without really giving it a second thought, he tucks one under his arm to flip through when he gets back to his own desk.

Flipping through the tourist catalogue, it was mostly ads for local businesses- restaurants and sights you and him had visited countless times already. He wasn’t really even paying attention to what he was reading, more so just skimming, until he saw the advertisements for the cabin towards the middle of the magazine. A two-page spread with pictures and convincing write-ups about the little getaway. Secluded and romantic, and just the perfect place for him to make up for the times lately he’s been away.

He couldn’t believe he had been able to pull off the surprise without you finding out, and the way your face lit up made all the extra shifts he had taken on made it all worth it.

“You sleeping, honey?” Lee asks, walking over to the bed as he kicks off his boots.

“No, just trying to warm up,” you answer, your face peeking out from under the covers. “You need to get out of those wet clothes, or you’re going to get sick.”

Lee nods in agreement, kicking off his socks and then pulling off his sweater. He untucks his tshirt from his pants before pulling it over his head and tossing it on to the floor with his other wet clothes.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” he chuckles, when he catches how your eyes are following his every movement. You shrug.

“You’re nice to look at,” you tease. He scoffs and continues to strip out of his pants until he’s left in just his boxers. He slides into the bed next to you, and pulls you close to him.

“Can’t believe we’re here,” he mumbles, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I’m sorry it couldn’t be sooner…”

“SHHH,” you gesture pressing a finger to his lips.

“You deserve so much more than me…”

“Shh,” you press a soft kiss to his lips. “That’s not true,” you mumble, sliding your hand down his chest.

He kisses you back tentatively, and cups your face with his hand as he turns on his side to face you. His other hand gazes your side and settles on your hip, pulling you closer as his thumb grazes the waistband of your panties.

He’d imagined the first night here to be much more frantic, rough and desperate. Now, he’s realizing that there is such a luxury of time here, and he can afford to waste hours with you just like this. He wants to take his time with you, at least for now.

He slides his hand further down your body and he grips the back of your thighs, and he practically kneads your skin there, massaging and just letting his hands feel the softness of your skin. You let out a soft moan, and he smiles. He swells with pride knowing after all this time, he still has this affect on you.

Your hands rest on his chest, and you can’t help but let your hands wander up his arms and shoulders and then up his back, and you feel him shiver at the feeling of your nails grazing his skin. He pulls away from the kiss, and ducks down to kiss and bite on your neck and collarbone. He moves his hands up to hold your back as he repositions you both so he’s hovering over you. You sit up slightly to reconnect your lips with his and he seizes the opportunity to unhook your bra and tosses it somewhere onto the floor with the rest of the discarded clothes.

“Beautiful,” he sighs, pulling you back in for a heated kiss, his thumb stroking your cheek gently, as his hand rests on your jaw. His other hand runs down your side, and you can feel how warm his hands are compared to your skin. You run your hand through his hair as his tongue slides into your mouth. You gasp when you hear the ripping of fabric.

“Lee!” You exclaim when you realize he just ripped your panties off. You watch with wide eyes as he just tosses the torn material behind him like he did nothing and he has the most satisfied smirk on his face.

“What is it, honey?” he asks, leaning down and whispering in your ear, sounding innocent. He kisses just under your earlobe gently, almost like his lips barely grazed your skin. “Tell me what you want,” he says, and you can hear the amusement in his voice as you whimper at the feeling of his hands squeezing the sensitive skin of your thighs.

“You want my fingers, baby?” he asks, inching his hands closer up and pressing little kisses down your jaw and neck as he rubs teasingly on your clit. You can’t help but moan, and your hips move in response to his touches. You whimper, desperate for more attention from him. “Or do you want my tongue, sugar?” he mumbles before kissing you again and letting his tongue explore your mouth. You are an absolute mess already. Needy and desperate, practically unable to hold still because of the way he was still teasing you. “Tell me, sugar. Let me give you everything you want.”

“Your cock,” you manage to let out breathlessly, tugging at the waist of his boxers, “Please, honey… Lee, I need you so badly.”

“I love you,” he exhales against your skin, pressing kisses down your neck and chest as he pulls off his boxers. “Fuck, sweetheart, I can’t tell you enough,” he groans, as he pumps his cock. “Fucking love you so much.”

“I love you,” you whisper back, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him closer. His hands rest on the mattress so he’s hovering above you, and you moan as he presses into you. Your hands instinctively go to his shoulders and your sure you’re leaving little crescent indents behind on his skin. He knows your body so well and as he finds his rhythm; he can’t help but just mumble praises of how well you take him, and how beautiful you look.

He lifts one of your legs and rests it over his shoulder as he continues his movements, and you cry out at just how good he feels. He’s so captivated by you, the way your eyes flutter closed and you head falling back, the way your mouth gaps open at the sensation of his thrusts. He’s addicted to watching the way you react to him, even after all this time. He loves the feeling of moving to have your legs wrapped tightly around his waist, and the way your fingers comb through his short hair. He loves the gentle and soft feelings of your palms and how that contrasts with the scratching of your nails, leaving red marks in their wake as you explore his back like you have a million times before.

“Lee…” you gasp, your chest rising and falling quickly, “I’m so close.”

He reaches down and rubs your clit as he continues his pace, and you moan at how overwhelmingly good his hand makes you feel. He can feel you, and the way your body responds to him, and he can feel how close you are. He doesn’t even think about himself, until he knows you finish. He’s chasing your high, kissing your swollen lips, rubbing circles on your clit and quickening his pace as he fucks you into the mattress. You cry out at the feeling as you cum, and at the feeling of your release, Lee’s follows.

He collapses next to you, his chest rising and falling quickly as he tries to catch his breath. He looks over to you, wide smile spreading across his face as he looks at you in your haze of just pure bliss. He leans over and kisses your temple.

“I’ll run us a bath.”

Taglist:

@scar-is-bi @jiminlife2k18 @asylummaniac01 @rosalynshields @charmed-asylum @jamesbuchananbuckybarnes1917 @alexandrathegreat3 @hersilencedscreams @malar-region @purplerain85 @vesper852 @smilewolfdolan @softshell-taco @champagnebucky @lilacmeadows @mollygetssherlockcoffee @bluebouquetcupcake29 @stucky-my-ship @moonliightbabes @sassy-kassaay @lharrietg @bbmommy0902 @hoe-for-sebstan @weenersoilderr @zombicupcake3 @hersilencedscreams @myriadofmagic @adelaide-walker @thedepressolit @samanthadegaro @stiles-stilinski-24-dylan @rebekahdawkins @letsfly-andbe-free @swiftieandthewintersoldier @iraot @witchybarb @teenagemutant  @weenersoldierr @greeneyedblondie44 @acciosiriusblack @captainofallfandoms @buckistan @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog  @femme-xx-fatale @chrisevansseagletattoo @lostgirl23sthings @myfandomcatchall @lowercasegenius @iss-vona @alexfms97  @fleetwood-mack  @vintagepigeon​ @dangerdolns @unsaltedalmonds @weenersoldierr​ @cspr-2​

[doctorstethoscope]

The Right Chapter 24 || Aaron Hotchner x Fem Reader

Happy Saturday my loves! A little fluff/angst double whammy for your afternoon :) 

contains: grouchy aaron, food mention, description of anxiety, canon-typical description of murder

wordcount: 2.4k

“I seem to remember you being the one lecturing me about the bureau’s generous sick leave policy not all that long ago,” You told Aaron as you gently shoved him back into bed three days after he’d broken his leg. 

“I also recall that in that situation, you were the one who was injured,” Aaron grumbles, and you roll your eyes. 

“Yes, and you stayed home to take care of me. Now, I’m returning the favor,” you reminded him. 

“I’m not going to get a brain bleed, I just need the leg to heal. You don’t need to stay with me all day while I sit in bed.” He argues.

“You’re right, but I think we both know that if I wasn’t here, you wouldn’t stay in bed, and seeing as how you can’t get as far as the bathroom without my help, that might present a problem.” You chastise him. “I’m not coming home to you bleeding out in the hallway because you fell over and couldn’t help yourself.”

“You make me sound like I’m eighty years old.” he scoffed. 

“Well, if you agree to wear a life alert, maybe I’ll go back to work.” You said, throwing your head against the pillows. There’s a few moments of silence, punctuated by Aaron’s deep sigh. 

“I’m glad you’re here. Sorry I’m being grumpy.” He apologized. “I just don’t want you to have to take care of me.” 

“You’re injured and in pain. You’re allowed to be grumpy,” you told him. “And I plan on taking care of you for the rest of my life, so you should start to get used to it.”

“Can I hold you for a little while? You don’t have to go near my leg,” he says, knowing you’ve been extra-gentle to avoid his injury since you’ve been home together. “You could put your head on my chest and I could just… hold you,” Aaron asks shyly, and your heart melts. 

“Of course, baby.” you say, snuggling your torso in close, leaning your head against his pec and resisting the urge to toss your legs over his. “See? Sick leave isn’t all that bad,” you tease him.

“No, I suppose not,” he smiles, rubbing an arm up and down your back.

“Jack is so excited to have you home.” You comment.

“Not that it matters, I can’t even take him to the park or ride a bike with him.” Aaron grouses. 

“Aaron, he’s over the moon just to have time to spend with you. He could sit here in bed with you watching Toy Story on a loop for the next six weeks and I’m sure he’d tell you it was the best month and a half of his life.” 

“A month and a half… I’m gonna go crazy.” Aarom remarks, more to himself than to you. 

“You’re gonna have to take up a hobby. Maybe knitting,” you snort, and Aaron smiles. 

“Yeah, or braiding or something,” he agrees offhandedly.

“Braiding?” You ask. 

“Oh, I mean, or maybe I could get back into Chess, finally get good enough to beat Spencer--” 

“No, no, back up, what made you bring up braiding?” 

“Uh… it’s just… something I’ve been thinking about in case we ever, you know, made a decision, and felt like maybe---” 

“Aaron, spit it out,” you laughed. 

“Just… if we had kids, or a daughter, I would want to be able to do her hair. Because if you’re not home, I don’t want to be the dad that doesn’t know how to do his daughter’s hair.” He confesses, the embarrassment clear in his tone. You place a kiss to his chest. 

“You are a good man, Aaron Hotchner.” 

“I’m glad you think so, anyways.”

“Alright, you’re getting grumpy and self-deprecating, which is a bad combo. You need a nap.” You instruct him teasingly. 

“You’ll be here when I wake up?” He asks, tightening his hold on you just slightly. 

“Of course, love. You go ahead and rest. I’m not going anywhere.”

You went back to work a little over a week later, when Aaron was mostly off of his pain meds, and able to get himself around the apartment without any assistance. You were still staying there when you weren’t on a case, and found yourself grateful that you’d decided to sign a month-to-month lease-- you weren’t sure what the point was of keeping up the pretense of separate places anymore. But, then again, with Aaron injured, now probably wasn’t the best time for a move. You're working through a few scenarios in your head when Spencer interrupts your train of thought. 

“How’s Hotch feeling?” He asks as you and the rest of the team board the jet to head home after a case. 

“He’s doing better,” you tell him. “The pain isn’t bothering him as much and he’s getting a little bit of his range of motion back. I’m still trying my best to keep him in bed, but I’m sure you can imagine how well that’s going,” you tell him with a smile. 

“Well, tell him I can’t wait to have him back. I hate all this paperwork,” Morgan cuts in with a playful chuckle, and you shove at his shoulder. 

“I’m trying to keep him home, Derek. Besides, we all know that Spencer is doing most of the paperwork for you,” you called him out, and Emily and JJ laughed.

“He’s just so fast,” Morgan defends himself, and now everyone is laughing. 

“We do want him back,” Emily tells you. “But not until he’s good and ready. And then, you know, maybe even a few weeks after that. Wouldn’t kill him to take a vacation.” 

“I’m not so sure about that,” JJ smirks. 

“Please, he’s already itching to get back to work. I think he’d leave me if I asked for a vacation.” You tell Emily.

“No, if you asked for a vacation he’d buy a plane ticket in an instant. And he’d bring his work phone and his computer to the beach and try to solve a murder from underneath a palm tree,” Morgan argued playfully. 

“Sometimes when we take a case somewhere warm, I stand in the parking lot for five minutes and face the sun. And if you close your eyes, it’s almost like a vacation.” You say. 

“Weren’t you literally taken hostage the last time you did that?” Spencer asks, and you roll your eyes goodnaturedly. 

“Well, there goes my tropical getaway,” you tease. 

With Morgan as acting unit chief, paperwork deadlines are considerably more flexible, which is to say nonexistent. Strauss would probably have a field day when she went to review the case file, but that wasn’t your problem. And, quite frankly, as you rushed to your car to get home to your boys, you couldn’t care less. 

When you swing the door open, you interrupt a very spirited game of Connect Four between Jack and Aaron. You notice that Aaron has at least three opportunities to make a winning move, all of which he ignores in favor of allowing Jack to push his chips in at random. 

“You’re home!” Jack exclaims when he sees you, scrambling across the living room and wordlessly commanding to be held by you. 

You hoist him up onto your hip, not without difficulty. He was getting big, and it made you a little sad. It strikes you that you won’t be able to do this forever, wrap him up in your arms and make him feel small and safe and secure. You squeeze him tighter. “Were you good for your daddy while I was gone?” 

“Uh-huh.” He nods, pulling back to look at you and running the collar of your shirt in between his thumb and forefinger absentmindedly. 

“And was Daddy good? He stayed off of his booboo leg?” You asked the only Hotchner who would give you a truthful answer. 

“Daddy was good.” Jack confirms, and you narrow your eyes skeptically. 

“Did he bribe you to say that? Ice cream for breakfast, or a new comic book?” You ask. 

“No. We watched Toy Story and I learned checkers. I had cereal for breakfast, not ice cream.” He tells you, and you relent. 

“Sounds like you had a lot of fun, bug.” You say, putting him down and crossing the living room to sit next to Aaron on the couch, who leaned over to press a kiss to the top of your head and placed a hand in your lap. 

“I did. But I missed you.” Jack tells you, climbing onto the couch next to you. 

“He’s not the only one,” Aaron whispers, pressing another kiss to your hair. 

“I missed you both, very very much,” you tell them, snuggling closer into Aaron and placing a hand in Jack’s hair. 

“We had pasta for dinner. I saved you a plate,” Aaron tells you. 

“Thank you, baby.” You tell him. “But, I’m pretty sure it’s past somebody’s bedtime…” You mention, and Jack pouts immediately. 

“I told him he could stay up until you got home, but he promised he wasn’t going to fight when it was time for bed, right buddy?” Aaron reminds his son. 

“Come on, sweet boy. I’ll tuck you in,” You tell him, pecking Aaron’s lips briefly before scooping Jack up off of the sofa and bringing him to his bed, tucking him in with extra stories and kisses to make up for the nights you missed while you were gone. 

When you come back into the kitchen, Aaron has heated up the leftover pasta and is waiting for you at the counter. 

“You didn’t have to get up, I would have done that,” you tell Aaron, knowing full well that he’d never actually listen.

“How was the case?” He asks as you settle in and start to eat. 

“It wasn’t too bad. We got the guy to surrender without hurting any of the hostages. A few of them were in pretty rough shape, but they should all recover.” you tell him in between bites. 

“And the team? Everyone’s doing okay?” 

“We’re all good, babe. JJ���s getting really good at the geographic profile, but I think it annoys her to stay at the station when we’re all out.” 

“She’s pregnant. It’s not worth the risk,” Aaron reminds you. 

“I know, honey, but it’s still annoying. It’s kind of like when you break your leg and you’re not allowed to go to work but you still have to hear all about it from your girlfriend,” you point out, and he smirks at you. 

“Morgan’s doing okay? The field agents aren’t giving him any trouble?” 

“Morgan can handle himself just fine against any cocky field agent. You don’t need to worry about us, sweetheart. We’re okay. You trained us up good,” you smiled at him, and he blushed, rolling his eyes at you. “We want you back, but we want you back healthy,” you tell him.

“Well, the doctor cleared me to start PT in two weeks. So hopefully I’ll be back sooner rather than later,” Aaron tells you. 

“That's great news! So the cast is coming off soon?” You ask. 

“Yeah, he wants to see me again to take it off and give me the final go-ahead for PT.”

“And you’re gonna take it easy at PT, because you know you can’t rush recovery, right?” You remind him. 

“Yes, mom,” he teases you with a smile. 

“It’s my turn to fret over you. Karma’s a bitch,” you smile at him as you get up to take his plate to the dishwasher. As you do so, his phone rings. 

“Hotchner,” he says into the receiver. “Woah, woah. Slow down, please. Are you okay?” Aaron says, and you turn around immediately, concerned. “Garcia, hold on. I’m going to put you on speaker. Yeah, she’s home. She’s here with me.” Aaron says, his eyes flicking over to you as he pulls the phone away from his ear and adjusts the volume. 

“Okay, so, I have been keeping an eye on Josh’s arrest record, awaiting his arraignment and his court dates so that we could throw a big ‘Josh is in prison for life party,’” she tells you, spitting out information a mile a minute. “There hadn’t been any movement for a few days, and I couldn’t figure out why, but I decided to check one more time before I went to bed tonight, and Josh’s dealer posted bail for him four days ago.”

“What?” You say. You heard her, heard every word she said in perfect clarity. But there had to be a mistake, right?

“Garcia, what do you have on the dealer? What has Josh been doing for the past four days?” Aaron asks, and you hear him, but you also… don’t. Everything sounds like you have cotton stuck inside your ears, or like you’re underwater. This couldn’t really be happening, could it?

“That’s a trigger,” you mumble quietly, and you think that Aaron doesn’t hear you, he’s so focused on his conversation with Garcia that you try hopelessly to follow. He turns to you, after a moment, tucking his phone back into his pocket. 

“What did you say, doll?”  He asks you. 

“That’s a trigger. You know, how we say that serial killers have triggers that make them start killing people. This is probably a trigger to start killing,” you say, staring at a spot of dirt on the tile. Jack must have tracked it on his cleats, and Aaron couldn’t mop with his injury. You should really clean that. You needed to get the dirt off the floor. Mop, mop, where did Aaron keep the mop? You pulled it out of the closet and were headed for the stain when you felt Aaron’s hands come to rest on your shoulders, blocking your path. 

“Hon, what are you doing?’ He asks, trying to make eye contact with you, which you avoided. 

“The floor needs to be mopped.” You answer, emotionless. 

“Why don’t you come sit down, the floor can wait,” he says, trying to guide you towards the sofa. 

“Aaron, your knee! Go sit. Go, go. I just need to get the floor clean. Please just go sit and I can fix it. It’s okay. I got it.” You got more and more worked up as you continued to stare at the dirt, watching the stain grow as your vision blurred, as if the dirt were mocking you. 

“Hey, hey hey. Where’d you go, angel? Come back here with me, love. You’re gonna be okay. I’m not gonna let anything happen to you.” He says, wrapping his arms around you. 

You’d never wished more that you believed him. 

tagging:  @romanogersendgame @wanniiieeee      @zheezs14      @greeneyedblondie44 @angelic-kisses13  @baumarvel @ssamorganhotchner  @ijustwannaread2k19    @rexit-mo @shmaptainhotchnersmain @qtip-blog @averyhotchner  @the-modernmary @itsmytimetoodream @choppa-style @hotforhotchner11 @infinite-tides @isthatme-thatsme @g-l-pierce @bakugouswh0r3 @ssahotchie @sleepyreaderreads

[amysteriousmessenger]

have you ever done rfa headcanons with a stressed out mc? because of like deadlines and stuff? cause that's the state I'm in rn and I need comfort ;-;

this is my second time writing this because my laptop deleted it ;-; I hope this is okay and I added V and Saeran because I’m a saeran simp <3 

RFA + Saeran and V with a Stressed Out Reader Headcanons

Yoosung Kim with a stressed out Reader Headcanons

Yoosung’s in the exact same camp as you, screaming. He spent the entire semester in front of his PC playing LOLOL and getting bullied by Seven, so now his deadline has creeped up on him. Yoosung absolutely understands the stress of a deadline coming at you fast and not being sure as to whether you can complete it in time.

The best thing that Yoosung can do for you is to do his own work. The two of you spend a straight 48 hours in the library, only taking breaks to go home and sleep and get food. You book out a private room and just mutually get your heads down. 

 Yoosung’s actually really smart, he just doesn’t apply himself. If you’re stuck on anything, he’ll try to help you even if he doesn’t know anything about your course. He’ll also run around the library finding you specific textbooks you need if he needs a walk or if he’s on his way back from getting you both a coffee. 

The life of a student is a hard one, but the two of you just keep reminding each other than you just gotta get through this one deadline and then you can sleep and play to your hearts content once again!

Zen/Hyun Ryu with a stressed out Reader Headcanons

It’s times like this that Zen thinks maybe he should have applied himself more in school, or at least got his qualifications, because he feels a little deflated at the fact that he can’t really help you with your work when you need it. He just looks at your laptop and textbooks and draws a blank. He hates seeing you so stressed, and he hates that he’s useless to help even more.

He figured that, if he can’t help you work, the next best thing would be to help you relax afterwards. He tries to keep out of your way, the best he can, but he gets a little sad and feels neglected, so he’s a bit like a puppy when he can sense you’re close to finishing up for the day.

 Zen thinks a nice, hot bubble bath would help you relax best. He’ll run you one when you close your laptop, leading you to the bathroom where he’s already sprinkled some rose petals and sweetly scented body oils into the steamy water. 

He’ll help you in, and then sit on the side of the bath and give your shoulders a rub, commenting on how they must ache after sitting at your desk for so long. It’s no secret that Zen has ~Magic Fingers~ and he massages away the tension in your neck as you melt into the soothing water. 

He’ll hum and sing little songs to you as he does this, finally happy that he can help you in his own special way. Ignore his comments about stress ageing you quicker, he’s just saying it as a pre-emptive measure rather than implying you have stress lines.

Jaehee Kang with a stressed out Reader Headcanons

Jaehee exists in a permanent state of stress, so she entirely understands what it’s like to have to meet deadline after deadline after deadline. If you tell her that you want to sit with her so you can share her concentration and get work done, she’ll put on a fresh pot of coffee. She’s also ready with the eye drops and painkillers for when your eyes get strained, but she’d really rather you not get to the point of needing them. 

Jaehee reminds you that you need to look after yourself, make sure you’re taking breaks and eating enough. She doesn’t want you to follow in her steps of pulling an all-nighter, so she doesn’t disturb you so you can get as much of your work done as possible. If you want her to, she’ll also gently reprimand you when you’re getting distracted or off task. She doesn’t like telling you what you can and can’t do, but she knows it’s going to help you in the long run. 

She’ll aim to get all of her work done at the same time as you, so the two of you can at least have some time to unwind together afterwards. She’ll put your favourite musical (of Zen’s) into the DVD player and you cuddle up with one another in recovery. She’ll also try to pull you in for an early night of sleep since you’ve been staring at a screen all day and doesn’t want you to get a headache. 

Jumin Han with a stressed out Reader Headcanons

Jumin never really gets stressed out over anything. In fact, the only things you’ve ever seen him get stressed about are you and Elizabeth the Third. He doesn’t really have the need or see the point in getting stressed over things, especially deadlines. Jumin will absolutely go off on a speech about correct time management and planning before you have to interrupt him and tell him that that’s not the problem. 

Having a Mensa-level IQ, Jumin’s probably already decently knowledge on your area of study, or offers to pay for you to have a tutor. Jumin’s honestly not the best person to be around when you’re stressed by deadlines because he really can’t relate to the panic, he’s too good at being a businessman that he gets everything done on time or, most usually, early. 

You do have to remind Jumin that not everyone can function and organise themselves as well as he can. 

However, it displeases him to see you stressed so he’ll at least try to help with that since you won’t let him help you academically. He’ll share a bottle of wine with you in the evening after you’ve finished for the day to help take your mind off of your deadline for a bit and will plan a small weekend getaway for the week after your assignment due date to reward you for getting your work done in time and to help you relax. He’ll also book you a spa day in one of C&R’s own establishments so he can guarantee you’re getting the best treatment. 

Saeyoung Choi with a stressed out Reader Headcanons

This man lives with more existential fear than anyone. He knows what it’s like to be Stressed TM. Seven’s an absolute genius with an IQ that could rival Jumin’s if he cared enough, so he’s never had to worry about academic worries, even when he was in University. 

If you ask him to, and maybe even if you didn’t, he’d be willing to hack your college or University’s database in order to either get the essay questions in advance so you know what to revise, or just straight up get the answers. He knows what frightening deadlines are like and he doesn’t want to see you suffer.

If you say that you don’t want him to hack your university because that’s, y’know, illegal, he’ll earnestly take a look at your paper and try to help. Seven has such a weird widespread collection of information in his head that he can just straight up tell you the essay or directly get the research essay that best fits your argument online. You said he can’t hack your university database, you didn’t say he can’t hack other databases for information. 

If you passed out asleep at your desk, you’d absolutely wake up to find your work finished and submitted. Seven will deny doing it, claiming that the alien mothership must have taken your laptop and completed your work, but he has a shit-eating grin plasters on his face and he’s oh-so-innocently fluttering his eyelashes. 

Saeran Choi with a stressed out Reader Headcanons

Saeran never really went to school, so he doesn’t have much experience with academic work but he picks it up very quickly when it comes to helping you!

He brings you hot chocolate and snacks and gives you a kiss on the side of the head every now and then to spur you on. He’ll also try to help you with reading through documents and essays for important information and anything that might be relevant to your course. From his time at Magenta, he’s very good at skimming through large quantities of work and compiling it into shorter documents so he’s absolutely a great person to have helping you. He has a similar IQ to Seven and is a genius in his own right, but he has to apply himself more to knowing about different topics because he’s never really had the opportunity to, but he’s always very interested to know about what you’re studying!

He’s very good at not disturbing you if you need peace and quiet, so he’ll busy himself with cleaning, cooking or going out in the garden so he can leave you without a distraction whilst occasionally dropping in to see how you’re doing and make sure you’re not getting too stressed out.

When you’re done for the day, Saeran will arrange the time to give you a little comfort evening with movies and a snack to make you feel better and help you unwind. 

Ray would absolutely just do your work for you, if you’d let him. He just wants to please you and see you happy, not swallowed up in stress in the same way that he has to be. He’d go without sleeping or eating if it meant helping you. Of course, you’re not going to let him do that, since you want him to rest properly, but he still wants to help. Ray would send you documents and essays when he’s supposed to be working and then exit the tab whenever anyone walks passed his room so he didn’t get caught. He just wants to ease your burden!

V/Jihyun Kim with a stressed out Reader Headcanons

He’s also incredibly smart, but probably wouldn’t have any major knowledge on what is it that you study but he’d help the best way he can. He’s the kinda person that would encourage you to read through the questions several times before you start answering and to not write anything down until you’re fully sure that you understand the source material and what is being asked of you.

He doesn’t like seeing you stressed and he’s helpful by nature so he’d ask if you needed help, and if you say no, he’ll give you space to get on with your work without interruption. V will make you food and bring your lunch with a coffee when it’s time to eat.

Like Jumin, he’d offer to share a bottle of wine to help you unwind when you’re getting too stressed in the evening, and if you can afford to take a break, he’d encourage you to do something creative like painting with him in his studio in order to take your mind off the analytical stuff. It doesn’t have to be good, it just had to help you relax and vent your frustrations!

V gets stiff shoulders when he’s been in the same position for long periods of time painting or waiting to capture a particular image, so he understands the usefulness of a good back rub and he’ll offer you one to loosen up the pressure in the back of your neck when you’re sitting at your desk. He’ll massage his thumbs into your shoulders and plant a little kiss on your lips when you lean your head back to look at him.

[starsstruck]

reclining venus

a friends-to-lovers in where photographer!mc is incited on a getaway in italy along with harry. golden sunsets, finished bottles of wine, and late night sketching.

pairing: harry x reader words:18.5k rated: M

an: after years i am back with something new ! hope everyone enjoys and tell let me know what you think ! would mean the world to me 💖💖 enjoy ! xoxo 💖 askbox  💖

                                                              ***

“I’m king of the world!”

Lazily looking up, the sun leaving your eyelids heavy. The sight of Harry standing near the edge of the small wooden boat, you smiled softly as you watched the way the breeze made his half-buttoned blue shirt blow behind him, and pushed some of his curls into his face. You couldn’t help the smile that pulled at the corner of your lips.

Your mind drifted, thinking that in that moment he bore resemblance to Hugh Grant’s character in Bridget Jones Diary, standing up on a boat, on the verge of falling over. 

As if reading your mind, you watched his head turn as he met your gaze, wide grin across his face as he quoted the movie that was just on your mind. Letting out a breathy laugh, you matched his smile as you could just get a peek of his eyes behind his dark sunglasses.

“Gonna tip us over,” your voice was soft, as you sunk back to your albeit uncomfortable position, back and bum on the hardwood.

The small getaway to the north of Italy was one that you weren’t expecting, but had gladly agreed to. You had never been to visit the lakes and mountains in the north of the country, and had immediately fallen in love with Orta San Giulio.

You had been working with Harry for nearly two years now. First meeting him when you were working for the studio that shot the cover for his first solo album. You still remember very clearly rushing into work that day, immediately busying yourself once you had gotten in, having seen the plans for the set up.

Not noticing him in that large studio space at first, you had been in the middle of moving a softbox across the room when you had stumbled into him. You remember your mouth hanging open as an arm reached out to steady you, asking you if you needed a hand. He wasn’t even supposed to be on set yet, things were still being put in place but he had come earlier was chatting with people around the set. You hadn’t talked to him again until the very end of the day, when you, your boss and Harry had filtered through the many images of the day. You had been surprised by how easy the two of you had gotten along. The two of you had chatted away, he had even asked to see pictures from your portfolio.

You had seen him a couple times after that day, even grabbing lunch with him when the two of you were both too hungry to keep working. But what had really surprised you was when you got a call, and was asked to join him on tour. You had shown him some of the minor concert photography you had done, never really considering doing it full time.

Yet you still agreed.

After tour, there were periods where you would go some months without seeing each other, but you would always be called up and asked to help with a shoot. And now you found yourself, asked to come to Italy for what was described to you as “a vacation, maybe we’ll do a shoot. Maybe not. Just some time off!”

Again, you had agreed, loving the time you spent with Harry and everyone, and yourself needing a little break. Taking advantage of the situation, you had actually given yourself an even longer vacation after the week was up. You were truly taking advantage of this time to relax.

You were so happy you had agreed to come, lake Orta seeming to come out of a dream. The small town of Orta San Giulio was right on the coast of the lake, mountains surrounding the body of water. Right in the middle of the narrow end of the lake and across from the town, rested a little island with beautiful buildings. A week to explore the space around, you guys had already gone walking through the mountains are were itching to see more.

Today was a bit more of a lazy day.

No one was that energetic to do anything big, the group splitting up. Both Harry and you had been looking into getting out to the water, finding a little rowboat rental company out on the dock. Neither of you were too keen on doing the majority of the rowing, deciding to stop and let the soft waves slowly drift you guys along the water.

It was so nice to float along the water, soft rocking leaving you calm. You rarely got a day to simply enjoy yourself, always having something going on that need to be worked on. You knew that soon you would need to return to the real world, leaving the small bubble you seemed to have created here in Italy. You knew Harry felt it as well. What with his constant busy schedule, you had definitely noticed a change in your friend.

His eyes didn’t hold the same bags they sometimes would, his shoulders not tensed. Even now, the way he stood tall, breathing in the fresh air around him, sun hitting his back. You wished you had your camera with you, even just your phone to take a picture of him, but had decided against bringing anything with you.

Just as you were basking in your relaxation, you were pulled back to reality. As predicted, Harry had managed to stumble from where he was standing. Instantly pulled from where your eyelids rested heavy, skin warm in the sun, you were suddenly met with a stark coldness.

Confusion clouding your mind for a split second as you suddenly found yourself submerged underwater, instinctively making your way up to the surface. 

“Ass,” you muttered as you coughed the bit of water finding itself trapped in your mouth. You saw Harry treading next to you, sunglasses having fallen off his face, eyes gleaming as he met your stare.

“My bad,” were the only words leaving his lips, as he chuckled to himself softly, hand moving up to push some hair out from his face. 

You coughed again, as you watched Harry turn away from you, and swim up to where your boat was now flipped over. Grabbing hold of it, he turned back to face you, concern now lacing his features.

“Alright?”

Nodding, you swam over to join him, hand resting on the flipped boat. “Yeah, yeah.” Muttering, although you bit at the smile starting to form. “Just be glad we decided not to take anything with us. It’d be lost by now.” 

“Think I lost my shades,” Harry nodded, hand moving to where they used to lay perched on his nose.

“That’s what you get.” You couldn’t even feign annoyance towards him, laugh tumbling out after the words left your mouth. “Give me a hand here,” you changed the subject, as you tried to push back the boat upright. 

Succeeding, you were now faced with the challenge of how exactly to get back in. “I’ll help y’a out,” Harry said next to you, once again reading your mind. You nodded, as you placed your hand on the edge of the boat, hoping that you had enough strength to pull yourself up. One hand still holding onto the wooden boat for support, Harry stuck out his other hand under the water, motioning for you to use it as a step to help you up. 

Shakily, you tried to hoist yourself up, feeling Harry pushing you up from under your foot. Managing to get one leg halfway over, you knew you must look completely ridiculous at the moment as you tried to not so gracefully get out of the water. Body suddenly jolting, as you felt a firm hand on your bum, giving you the last push you needed before successfully getting back into the boat. 

“I’ve got half a mind to leave you here, if you can’t keep your hands off my ass.” Teasing, as you looked down to where Harry still floated in the water next to you.

“Just trying to help y’a out, love.” He shot back, small shrug on his shoulders. You watched as his tongue darted out of his mouth, licking his lips. You felt your cheeks warm, hoping there was enough sun in his eyes for him not to notice.

It was always like this with Harry. As you guys started working together more often, your relationship had always been friendly. Although, there was always a little flirtatious aspect to your relationship. You usually brushed it off, knowing Harry was like this with a lot of people, that you shouldn’t read too much the cheeky comments that were directed your way. 

But then there were the nights where Harry would keep his hand on your leg as you sat next to him, the nights where he pulled at you to sit closer. For all the times you would spend the night with him, of course always having a reason for why it was the most convenient, but maybe neither of you wanted to say that you wanted to spend the night in each other’s arms. 

The two of you were both the type of people who enjoyed embracing the people you cared about, small touches as signs of affection. So, it was only natural that when you shared a bed, Harry’s arm always ended up wrapped around you. Especially the nights where the pair of you had had a couple of drinks, Harry always being cockier and a bit grabbier. 

The night of Harry’s last show of his first solo tour, a warm summer night in Los Angeles. It was a happy night, Harry giving another amazing performance. You had always found yourself mesmerized with the way he was on stage. After the show had ended, you were backstage and already flipping through the images on your camera. 

There was a small party happening backstage, just a small thanks Harry was giving to everyone who had helped him with the album and the tour. Bottles of champagnes were passed around the room, as Harry was thanking members of his team personally. 

You had already had about two glasses of champagne before you finally got to talk to Harry yourself. He immediately wrapped his arms around you, pulling you in for an engulfing hug. 

“You were amazing,” you told him, voice quiet as your lips were near his ear. “Really amazing, tonight, this whole tour.” 

He pulled away from the hug, arms remaining around you. He was beaming, still on his high of performing and of all the love in the room for him. “Thank you, love.” He told you honestly. “And thank you for coming along, these shows can last forever because of your photography.” 

“Thank you,” you giggled at his words. “But I play no role in making the shows so incredible -” 

He cut you off before you could brush off his compliment. “Don’t say that, don’t even think it,” he was shaking his head at you. “You play a huge role. Can’t be where I am without you.” 

You knew his words were not completely true, but you didn’t try to fight him on it. “C’mon love,” Harry turned, arm still around your shoulders, “Let’s go celebrate.”

A group of you had headed out to some club in the city, more drinks passing between the bunch of you. Everyone was chatting away, excited, drunk, happy. Harry was seated next to you, arm around the back of your chair, hand once and a while grabbing at the skin of your arm.

You’d had no idea what time it was when you guys had decided to call it a night, head spinning and exhaust of the day finally catching up. You had stepped out before anyone, followed by Harry. He was once again pulling you in for a big hug, thanking you for the thousandth time that night. You giggled in his arms, as he pressed a kiss on the apple of your cheek.

But he didn’t move away. 

You felt his lips push more kisses onto your cheek, moving down to the corner of your jaw. They were light, spongey kisses, but they still made the breath stop in your throat. He paused beneath your earlobe; arms still tight around you.

You felt him press an open mouth kissed on the skin under your ear, hot breath against you sending shivers down your spine. Lips hovering, teeth dragging over your skin, hips jutting against yours. Just as quickly as it had started, it ended. He had untangled himself from you in a flash, as the rest of your group joined you outside.

You tried to control the flush growing on your neck, thinking it best to brush it off as the two of you were intoxicated and just affectionate people. But still you couldn’t shake the feeling of his lips on your skin.

You felt the boat rock once again as Harry put his weight to one side, trying to lift himself up. He held out a hand towards you, as he found himself in the same position you had been. “Help me out, will ya?” He exhaled, looking up to meet your eyes.

Wordlessly reaching out, own hand wrapping around his wrist as you tugged him towards you. Falling into the curve of the boat next to you, Harry let out a sigh as he caught his breath. Now out of the water and aware of the clothes that clung to his body uncomfortably, Harry leaned his head against the edge of the boat, head turning to face you. 

Mirroring his motions, you closed your eyes and let out a content hum. “Kind of nice actually, the feeling of the fresh water.” You murmured, sun heating up your skin once again as the two of you sat in silence.

Harry watched you, watched your eyelids flutter and close as you faced the sun, watched as you extended your limbs to feel the warmth all over your body. He followed the drops of water that were coming from your shorts as they ran down your drying skin, his fingers itching to reach out and wipe them off. Eyes trailing up your torso, he glanced at where the wet fabric of your tank top clung so beautifully to your skin. The swell of your breasts so evident, as the wet fabric left nothing to the imagination. 

Fuck, Harry couldn’t help but immediately notice how evident it was that you were not wearing a bra. He told himself to look away, that he shouldn’t be looking at you like that, that it would make you uncomfortable if you could see the way his eyes were glued to your body.

“Should be heading back,” Harry muttered, willing the image of your breasts to leave his mind before blood rushed down to his cock. Looking away and pulling himself up from where he rested, the movement and his words having you open your eyes. 

“Yeah,” You nodded, eyelids already feeling heavy again, as you fell back into your state of relaxation. “I’m getting hungry.”

                                                              ***

After dinner and a bottle of wine, the group of you were settled on the small balcony, basking in the warm night. You were in the midst of talking about the work you did outside of photography, after had prompted you about the years you had spent in art school. 

Where photography was your favourite medium to work with, along with video, you were still quite fond of drawing and painting as well. Having to experiment with different modes of creation when you were in school, you took a big liking to drawing and painting. However, you found yourself not able to express what you wanted the way you could with photography, appreciating the mediums for the way you could create an image with your hands. 

Still, you enjoyed sitting down and drawing with your friends, or a little still-life in front of you for fun. You kept your serious work, and your most honest work in your photography. 

You finished off the last of the wine in your glass, deciding to go grab some more. You excused yourself as you stood and head to grab the bottle that was still inside. 

The presence of someone else in the room startled you, as you poured yourself another glass. “Didn’t know you did much drawing.” Harry’s voice was low as he passed his glass to you, wordlessly asking for more wine. 

“Never asked,” you grinned at him, handing him back his glass as you took a sip of your own drink. Cheeks already warm from the wine, you felt them get even warmer as Harry’s gaze lingered on you. “Nothing big,” you continued after Harry remained silent. “Just drawing for fun.” 

“Draw people?” His words were slightly slurred together, as he spoke quietly. He leaned on the counter next to you, close enough for you to feel the warmth coming from him. You silently wondered how much he had to drink, as he intensely held your gaze. 

“Yeah,” voice sounding small, you cleared your throat before continuing. “Friends, nice views or photos that I take. Sometimes I like to draw people I see when I sit at a cafe.”

“You think you could draw me?” 

Slightly taken aback by his words, the thought had never crossed your mind. “Yeah? Didn’t know you would want that.”

“Already taking so many pictures of me, why not some drawings as well?” He shrugged his shoulders, finally looking away from you as he glanced down at the glass in his hands, taking another sip, licking the wine off his lips. 

You bit your lips together as his words, fighting a smile. “Can't get enough of yourself, can you?” 

A smirk tugged at his lips. “That’s right, love.” 

“We can tonight if you want?” Harry continued, watching your face for any sign to tell him that he was pushing his luck. “Draw, watch a movie or something, just the two of us,” he looked down to his hands again as he trailed off.

“I miss you.” The words came so softly from his lips, you almost missed them. They sent a rush through your body, as he met your gaze once again.

“Harry,” you couldn’t help the small laugh that pushed past your lips. “We spent all day together.” 

“I know,” he drawled out his words. “But we’ll be leaving soon, and I won’t get to see you every day anymore. Want t’spend time with you.”

Biting your lip again at his words, as you fought the blush that was warming your neck. “So tonight, yeah?” 

“Tonight.” You nodded, eyes soft, arm playfully bumping his before heading back to the balcony, Harry following not far behind.

You rejoined the group, listening to the conversation you had walked in on. Your eyes wandered over to Harry, finding him already watching you. Passing him a small smile, as you drank your wine and moved your gaze to the view around you. You couldn’t tell if Harry was acting different tonight, or maybe it was just the exhaustion from a relaxing day, mixed with a little too much wine. 

Soon, everyone was heading back inside, finishing cleaning up and heading off to bed. Drowsy from a from a day in the sun, the wine not helping with heavy eyelids. After saying your goodnights, you headed to your room in the shared apartment. 

Quickly changing, you put on your pyjama shorts and an oversized teeshirt, skin still warm as the night didn’t get very cold. Grabbing some pencils from your bag, and a large pad of paper that you did most of your sketching on, you headed down the hall and gave Harry’s door three quiet knocks. 

His door swung open, eyes meeting yours. You took in his appearance, noticing he had also changed, wearing a pair of black shorts and nothing else. You walked past him and into his room, a small “hi” leaving your mouth as you willed your eyes not to linger on his bare chest next to you.

You stood in his dimly lit room, unsure of where to situate yourself. His room, like yours, was small, a bed in the middle of the room and a small desk a chair to the side of the room. Harry had his things sprawled out over the desk, and the floor for that matter, luggage poking out of the closet to your right. You moved to sit on the chair, before Harry called you over to where he had sat on the bed.

“Here’s fine.”

“You sure? Don’t want to get eraser shavings all over the sheets.” You smiled as he waved your comment off, patting the spot across from him. Making your way over to join him, you sat crossed legged across from him, sketchpad on your lap. You watched as he fiddled with his phone, as the first notes of a Mazzy Star song started playing.

Placing his phone next to him, he faced you. “How d’you want me?” 

“Up to you, whatever is comfortable.” Opening up your sketchpad to a new page, grabbing the pencil resting next to you. “I’m gonna start with some fast and simple sketches, feel free to change poses whenever you want.” 

Harry extended his legs across the mattress, feet just hanging over the edge as he rested his head in his hand. Laying on his side, he watched your eyes move along his figure in front of you. 

“Haven’t done a drawing session like this in a while,” you murmured, as you began drawing rough shapes onto your page, eyes flicking up to Harry every once and a while. 

“Not many offering to pose for you?” Harry’s voice was low, eyes watching your hands as they skilfully moved the pencil on the page. 

“No, nothing like that,” letting out a breathy laugh, the thought of doing something like this not even occurring to you since you were a student. “Just never really considered it. Years ago, some friends and I would have nights where we would draw each other, and then I had to do some for class, but nothing since then.” 

Harry hummed, curious about your days spent studying art. “Had to sit around some naked guy, while everyone drew him? Like in the movies?”

You laughed, knowing exactly the stereotypical movie scenes he was talking about. “Yeah, actually, I did have to do that.” 

You saw Harry’s eyebrows shoot up, teasing at first but surprised he had been right. “Really? Fully nude?” 

Nodding, you flipped over the pages in your sketchbook as you continued your quick sketches. “Usually had a couple days of life drawing like this, different models, always nude. Supposed to see how the body moves and all that.” 

“Sounds hot,” you glanced up at Harry at his words, holding back a laugh. 

“Not a lot of people getting hot and bothered in class drawing an old man, Harry.” 

“Old man,” Harry exclaimed, dimples popping on his cheeks. “Very hot. Did you like school?”

Nodding, you matched his smile. “Yeah,” you stopped drawing, thinking about his question. “Yeah, I mean as much as it was tough, I still couldn’t imagine myself doing anything else.” 

You watched Harry nod at your words, bottom lip between his teeth. “What about you? Ever think about what you would have continued to study?” 

His eyes met yours, slow nod as he thought it over. “I mean, yeah, of course I’ve thought about it but,” he paused again. “Who knows what I would be doing. Like you said, where I am now, I couldn’t imagine myself doing something else.” 

You smiled at his words, telling him you were going to start actually drawing him instead of just outlines and to try not to move too much. Harry continued to talk about aspirations he had when he was younger, what could have been if he had never become a musician. He chatted away, moving constantly but you never said anything, happy to listen to him. 

One thing you loved about drawing people, especially people you knew, was that it always made you notice new things about them. You had spent enough time staring at him, and at his face, all those hours you’d spent editing pictures of him. But as you had him bare chested in front of you, you took your time to take in all the ways his muscles moved under his skin, off all the tattoos that covered his chest and arms.

You found it endearing really, the way he wanted to have art all over his body. 

“Wan’ to move, that’s okay?” His voice broke you from your thoughts, looking up from the paper in front of you. 

“‘Course,” voice low, as you admired the drawing you had started. Flipping the pad over to a new page, you waited until Harry stopped shuffling on the bed in front of you. 

You were a bit taken aback when you looked up at Harry. He sat comfortably, back leaning against the backboard of the bed, legs pointed towards you. He faced you so directly, eyes concentrated on you. He had been facing you before, but it had been much more casual, as he rested his head in his head. 

There was something just a bit more, intimidating, about the way he sat in front of you. 

As you started another drawing, a comfortable silence fell between the two of you. You were putting extra attention into this drawing, it being a little easier as Harry wasn’t moving around as much as before.

About half an hour passed before Harry started mumbling about his back feeling sore, and you decided it was a good place to end, knowing that you could go on and on nitpicking over a sketch.

“Can I see?” 

You don’t know why Harry’s question made you pause. Of course he would want to see the drawings you had done of him. Yet, you found yourself hesitating to show him. It just seemed like such an intimate moment, and the idea of sharing the drawings, even sharing them the person that you had been drawing, seemed like too much. 

“I,” you paused, unsure of what to do or say. “Want finish some details on them. Show them to you soon, I promise.” The lie left your lips easily, mind easing as Harry nodded along. 

“Perfectionist, yeah?” He smirked, nodding in understanding. “‘Course, love. We can do this again and you’ll show them to me later, yeah?” 

“Yeah,” you nodded, biting back a smile. You don’t know why, the idea of Harry wanting to have you draw him again made you so happy.

“Want t’watch a movie, stay the night here?” His voice was quiet, smirk wiped from his face as he spoke tentatively. 

This time, you couldn’t help the smile that broke out. “Bridget Jones?” Ever since earlier that day as Harry recreated Hugh Grant’s actions on the boat from the movie, you had an itching to watch the whole film. 

He nodded along, very pleased that you had agreed. Harry quickly headed to the washroom as you moved up the bed and slid in under the thin sheets, the night too hot to need anything warmer. Harry quickly joined, grabbing his laptop and finding the movie to put on for the two of you. Pressing play, he shifted closer to you, one arm swinging around your back and pulling you in to him.

“That’s you,” you muttered, pointing to the screen when Hugh Grant fell from his boat into the water, right down to the blue shirt.

Harry shifted next to you, gazing down at you with eyebrows shot up. “Wha’? I’m a much better guy than he is.”

You beamed up at him, eyes slightly squinting to see him clearly in the dim room. “That’s true,” pausing, glancing between Harry and the character on screen. “Better looking than him too.”

Harry’s grin widened at your words. “Glad to hear it love.”

Placing your head back against his chest, you hummed as Harry’s fingers fiddling with the sleeve of your shirt, his grip around you tightening.

                                                              ***

Bare thighs hitting the hard material of the chair, you felt your dress ride up as you sat down around the table. Turning your head over your shoulder, you watched as Harry approached the table you guys had situated yourselves at, drinks in hand. 

“Gin and tonic for you,” Harry sat down next to you, knee bumping yours as he slid your drink over to you. Sipping his own drink, he watched as you picked up the lime from the rim, squeezing it so the juices from the fresh fruit dripped into your cup. Bring the wedge up to your lips, biting through the juices that remained in the fruit, before putting what was left of the wedge into your glass. 

Harry kept his eyes on your lips as you laughed at something Sarah said, as you tongue licked up the rest of the sour taste from your lips. Smiling to himself as he watched you repeat the same drink ritual for the hundredth time, as you seemed pleased with yourself after finally taking a sip.

“Can I try?” Your voice broke Harry out of his daze, as you pointed at the drink that he held. Passing his drink over to you, he chuckled to himself as you always asked to try what he was drinking. “You won’t like it.” 

Placing the glass to your lips, you quickly pulled it away after getting a small taste. Lips curving in distaste, your expression proving him right. “Mine’s better.” You nodded, passing his glass back to him, leaving a mark of your lipstick on the rim. 

You took another long sip of your drink, pleased with the way the cold liquid cooled you down, fingers wet from the condensation on the glass. Today the sun had been even hotter, leaving your skin warm and sticky after it set. 

The group of you fell into conversation, discussing various aspects of your day and of your time in Italy. Everyone seemed to have had a good time relaxing on this mini-vacation, no one wanting to leave the bubble you had created. 

“Have you figured out where you’re heading afterwards?” The question was directed at you, as you still had some time off after the shoot you had finished. The rest of them had to head to London, but you decided to take advantage of this much needed break.

“France,” you said, finishing off your drink. “Up to the mountains. Around the Alps. And then maybe the south for a couple days.”

You were looking forward to do some exploring on your own. Your work allowed you to travel, which was something you were beyond grateful for, but you rarely got the time to slow down and full explore the places you were in. You had been itching to come back to Italy and France, pleased that you finally could. 

As conversation settled on places traveled to and where was wanted to visit next, you excused yourself to the washroom and to go grab another drink, not feeling the effect of your first drink yet. Fixing your lipstick and blotting the dewy skin on your face, you headed from the washroom to the bar, ready for another drink.

Using your albeit rough Italian skills, you got yourself another gin and tonic. You felt a bit silly, getting a drink that you could order anywhere in the world, in a country that had such great wine. But you told yourself that it was better to buy a bottle, rather than an expensive glass at a bar. 

Waiting for your drink, and lost in your thoughts of which alcohol was the best bang for your buck, you failed to notice Harry come stand next to you at the bar. Hand sliding to the small of your back, lips hovering over your ear. 

“Getting another drink?” His voice was low, but you could still clearly hear him over the loud space around you. “Choose one for me?”

Before you could say anything to Harry, your drink appeared in front of you. Leaning in to talk to the bartender again, ordering Harry the same drink that you had been drinking all night. 

“You’re going t’have dreamy frenchmen hanging all over you in France.” He said as the two of you waited for his drink.

Breathy laugh coming from your mouth at his comment, you shook your head. “No way. I’m taking time for myself,” looking down at your drink, lime coating your fingers. “Just relaxing.”

“You gonna be okay by yourself?” Harry thanked the bartender, handing them some folded euros, eyes roaming back to yours.

“‘m a big girl, Harry.” You beamed, sipping your drink after adding your lime. 

Humourless chuckle escaping his mouth, he nodded. “I know, I know. Just worry about you is all.” 

You watched as Harry grabbed his lime wedge between his fingers, lifting it up to hold it in front of your mouth, silently telling you to take it between your teeth.

Obeying, you watched his smirk deepen as you grabbed the lime with your teeth. Thumb brushing against your lip as he pulled his hand away. He brought the same thumb to his own mouth, licking off any remaining juices from the sour fruit. Biting into the lime, you pulled the wedge out of your mouth, placing the slice into your own drink. You held his gaze, face feeling unbelievably hot. 

“Are you worried?” You teased, going back to what you guys were talking about before your little lime induced staring contest. “Or jealous.”

Harry shook his head, breaking your gaze. His hand came back down to the small of your back, leading you away from the bar and back to where your table sat outside.

“Can’t it be a bit of both?” His tone was teasing, but as you rejoined your group and watched as Harry scooted his chair closer to yours, you wondered if there was truth to his words. 

The night went on and the drinks flowed between your group, enjoying one of your last nights in Italy. As you sat back in your chair, watching the emptying streets around you, the sound of music and laughter being the only ones to fill your ears.

You also couldn’t help but feel hyperaware of every movement Harry made next to you. Every time his leg bumped yours under the table, every glance or smirk in your direction, every small nudge of his shoulder. 

You were at a point in the night, and maybe your intoxication, where Harry’s leg fully rested against yours, his arm spread over the back of your chair. You tried not to overthink the act, knowing that it didn’t mean anything, that you shouldn’t think it meant anything. Harry often swung his arm around the back of a chair, regardless of who was sitting there. Still, you couldn’t help the heat wash over your body at the thought of Harry longing to be closer to you.

After yawns started to fall from your lips, unable to participate in conversation anymore, you were about to suggest heading back. Harry, using his remarkable talent to read your mind, offered to walk with you as the others all wanted to stay for another drink. 

“You’re exhausted love, c’mon.” Harry stood from where he was sitting, waiting for you to do the same. You both said your goodbyes and goodnights to everyone, discussing your plans for breakfast the next morning, before walking back to the apartment building you were staying at. 

Although well into the night, the thin fabric of your dress and the humid air was enough to keep you warm. 

"Didn’t have to leave early with me.” You said, unsure if Harry had wanted to stay. “Told you Harry, I can handle myself.”

An ill-timed stumble on the cobblestones beneath your feet did not help you prove your point. Harry laughed at you, linking arms with you to keep you from stumbling further. 

“Bit drunk, aren’t you?” He grinned at you, dimples deep on his cheeks. “No,” you giggled into his arm, the word a lie but you knew him well enough to know that he was slightly intoxicated as well. 

“Right love,” he scoffed, “Guess you don’t need me to hold onto then?” 

You watched as he detached himself from you, talking long strides as he moved away from you.

“Harry,” you drawled out, already missing his skin against yours. You watched your steps this time, not wanting to trip on the uneven stones of the road. 

Harry stopped in his steps, watching you get closer to him. He laughed that loud laugh you loved to hear so much, holding out a hand for you to grab. 

“Look pretty tonight,” Harry suddenly found his voice quiet, as he watched you approach him and placed your palm on his. He hadn’t been able to go without being close to you in some kind of way tonight, like your body was a magnet pulling him in. 

He watched you, your features glowing softly in the dim light of the street. Hoping he wasn’t imagining what looked like a blush on your cheeks, he couldn’t stop himself as his free hand reached out under your chin. 

You didn’t say anything to his compliment, no words being formed in your mouth as Harry brushed his thumb gently over your bottom lip, over the remains of your lipstick. “Lovely colour on you.”

Harry’s hand titled your head up slightly, other hand that was laced with yours tugging you closer.

“Thank you,” were the only two words you could muster at that moment, barely a whisper. “You always look pretty too, Harry.” You immediately wanted to cringe as you heard the words coming out of your mouth.  

“Is that so, love.” Breath fanning over your face, that smirk reappeared on his face. “Always?” 

You nodded slightly, not trusting your voice, and watched as his eyes dropped down to your lips, thumb nudging them again. 

They lingered there for a moment, a moment far too long. The two of you were nearly flush against each other, one of your hands still laced together.

“Let’s head back, yeah?”  Harry whispered as took a step back, letting go of your hand and re-linking your arms. 

You didn’t say anything as you leaned into his arm, already overthinking the moment you had just shared. Part of you was beating yourself up for not being the one to make the first move. But the other part of you was terrified of what would happen, and needed him to be the one to make the first move. 

If you had been tired before, you were exhausted by the time you made it back to the villa. Heading immediately to the washroom when you walked through the door, wanting nothing more than to wash off your make up and brush your teeth. 

Leaving the washroom, you saw Harry waiting outside the door. “You want to,” he paused, as you stopped next to him. “Stay with me tonight? Don’t want t’sleep alone.”

You sucked your lips between your teeth, trying to bite back a smile as you faced him, nodding tentatively. Finding yourself unable to fight the smile on your face, you watched as his expression mirrored yours. “Gonna grab some water first.”

After forcing yourself to drink an entire glass, and refilling one to leave by the bed, you skipped past your room and made your way to Harry’s. 

Placing your water on the bedside table, you glanced around his room. Grabbing a shirt from the chair where Harry had left some thrown across the back, you quickly pulled off your dress and bra to change into the shirt before Harry came back from the washroom. 

Folding your clothes together and placing them next to your water, you slid under the sheets, happy to finally lay down. 

Harry held his breath as he left the washroom and stopped dead in his tracks when he saw you through the open door, peeling your dress from your skin. He tried to make the least noise as possible, knowing he should look away. He was still a bit drunk, and still playing the moment he had almost kissed you over and over in his head. 

Your back was turned to him, and he could feel as blood rushed to his cock, as he saw you standing in only your blue underwear. Turning in his heels, he walked back into the washroom. Mentally talking himself down, he gripped the counter and shut his eyes praying he didn’t grow harder. 

You were already drifting into sleep in Harry’s bed, eyes fluttering open as you felt him finally join you in bed. You felt the mattress dip as he shifted closer to you, watching him as you lay on your side.

“Have a good day?” Harry whispered to you, body shuffling to his side so he could lay directly across from you. “Yeah,” you nodded, voice at a whisper as well. “Really good day. Really good time on this trip, too.”

Harry grinned at your words, pleased to hear you were enjoying yourself. “Me too,” he whispered, hand sliding over to wrap around your waist. “C’mere.”

He pulled you closer, rolling to his back and brought his other arm around you, waiting for you to lift your head for it to rest under you. Accepting the warmth of his skin against yours, even in the heat of the room. Once settled, mumbled a small goodnight to him. You couldn’t help smiling at the way you fit next to him, the way he itched to lay closer to you.

You glanced up at Harry as he muttered your name, not having a chance to react as his head dipped down, lips pressing a chaste kiss right at the corner of your mouth. Your eyes widened, barely registering the small “night love” that he mumbled, before dropping his head back down to the pillow.

You held your breath as you tried to slow your beating heart, certain that he would be able to feel it. He must have wanted to kiss your cheek, you thought to yourself, calming yourself. He’s drunk, he’s tired.

                                                              ***

Yours and Harry’s shoes shuffled on the stone steps that led up to your floor in the apartment you were staying in. Bags in hands that were hitting your legs as you walked up the steps, you were looking forward to something refreshing to drink along with a nice meal.

Everyone had split up today, having different ideas of what they wanted to do. Ever since your little rowboat adventure, both you and Harry had been itching to get to Isola San Giulio, the island that sat in the lake, not too far of from the mainland.

It had been another tranquil day, taking your sweet time to wander around the small island, cameras, both digital and film, at your hip. You often stopped Harry, telling him to stand in a certain spot as you took a few steps back to snap a shot of him, and taking extra special ones with your film camera.

Harry always pretended to be bothered by it, but you knew he wasn’t. He liked being your muse.

He would always grab at the camera, telling you that he wanted to get pictures of you as well, but was rarely able to pull the camera from your arm. Still though, he sometimes managed to get a few shots of you, showing you right after and telling you “pretty good, aren’t I? Got a knack for this, I think.”

Favourite thing were the deteriorating frescos that lined the walls of the basilica that sat in the middle, you want to take your time and admire every image. The day was just as warm, sun filtering through the island and leaving bits of golden yellow across the warm bricks.

After eventually coming back to the mainland, the two of you headed to a nearby market to pick up some vegetables, fresh pasta, and some wine. You let Harry do a lot of the talking with the local merchants, impressed with his growing Italian skills.

Placing the groceries in the kitchen, you stopped Harry once again as you reached for your camera. “Lights really nice right now,” you murmured, adjusting the shutter on your camera before pointing the lens at Harry. Soft yellow light as the sun would set in a couple hours, it shone around Harry as his back faced the peach coloured stone of the balcony.

He looked like a dream today. White teeshirt, that was simple but still fitted, tucked into some loose deep brown trousers. Dark blue silk scarf that was tied around his neck, you had once or twice untied it during the day, to tie around your own neck. “Look classy with an ascot,” you had said, as you admired your appearance with Harry’s scarf.

Harry had also admired you, liking the way it matched the rest of your outfit. You had been nearly exclusively wearing sundresses during your trip, today being no exception. Hem hitting the middle of your shins, the soft cream colour fabric jutted out from where it was tighter around your abdomen, small red and orange embroidered flowers trailing down the sides.

“Wine?” Harry’s voice pulled you back into reality, watching as he held up one of the bottles you had bought today. “Of course.” You beamed at him, placing your camera on the counter as you grabbed the vegetables from your cloth bag.

Starting to chop the courgettes, you hummed a quiet thank you to Harry as he passed you a wine glass. Glass hinting yours in a wordless cheers, you both sipped at the wine as you continued to make dinner.

Just over half an hour later, the two of you sat across from each other at the table on the balcony, enjoying your dinner and wine. Both very pleased with the result of your dish, chattering away as you finished up eating just as the sun started to set.

Harry sprang up, running inside before coming back out with your camera in hand.

“You’re glowing love,” he grinned, sitting back down before pointing the camera lens in your direction. The sun creating an orange glow all around, you hoped it hid your blush from his words. “Shift forward a bit.” He said to you, wanting until you listened.

He snapped a few pictures of you, grinning down at the camera as he checked them before passing it to you. “See? Beautiful. Need to let me take pictures of you more often.”

“Looks good Harry,” you smiled softly at his compliment.

The both of you stayed outside until the sun was fully set, passing the camera between each other and finishing the rest of the wine. It wasn’t until the bottle was finished that the two of you decided to head inside.

After clearing out you plates and dishes, Harry tugged at your arm as he urged you to draw him again. Easily agreeing, you couldn’t help but giggle at his eagerness.

He sat himself down on the bed again, as you easily joined him with sketch book and pencils in hand. His eyes gleamed in the soft light of the lamp next to him, cheeks tinted red from the wine and wide grin on his face.

Repeating your actions from the night before, you started with small fast sketches of Harry as he lay with his legs sprawled towards you. He kept chattering away, again not doing his best at sitting still but it didn’t bother you at all.

Conversation slowing down between the pair of you, Harry rested his head against the wall behind him, eyes shutting softly. You might have thought that he was sleeping, if it wasn’t for the small comments he made once and a while, continuously asking if his pose was okay.

He shifted around a couple more times, settling on a pose with his back slouched against the pillows behind him, as you told him to try not to move for a bit longer.   You found yourself working faster today, maybe it was the wine that made your movements a bit sloppier, or maybe it was the familiarity that you had established with his body.

Conversation coming to a stop as you sat in a comfortable silence, you concentrating on the drawing in front of you and Harry enjoying watching you draw. It wasn’t until a few songs had passed in the silence, before Harry spoke up again.

“You said you used to draw people naked?” Harry broke the silence, as you focused on the detail of his shoulder. You hummed, eyes flicking to his, unsure of where he was going with this. 

“Think it would be better if I was naked?” He said, after a few seconds of silence. You felt heat rush to your face at his words, stopping your pencil on the page. 

“I think you’ve had too much to drink.” You said forcing a small laugh, willing yourself to look up at him. 

“I'm serious, love. Said so yourself, you can really see how the body moves.” His voice was devoid from any humour, but as you met his eyes you say that familiar gleam in them. 

He suddenly got up from the bed, shuffling over to where the desk was in the corner of the room. Your widening eyes followed him across the room, suddenly aware of how hot your cheeks were burning. 

“Harry,” you started to say, as if a small warning. Yet as you heard your voice, it was barely above a whisper. “Only if you want to, love.” 

Harry’s eyes searched yours, as he began to panic in your silence. Shit, what if he had pushed you too far? He didn’t want to scare you off, quite the opposite in fact. He watched as you slipped your lip between your teeth, seemingly thinking it over.

You knew that you should say no, that this was not something that you guys should do. The both of you had seen each other naked before, in quick glances of moments where you needed to change, or where you opened a door without knocking first.

But this was something very different. You already got a bit flustered around him, and you couldn’t help but overthink every time he was extra touchy with you. You knew that he was just that kind of person, and that he acted that way with a lot of people. But every time his leg rested against yours when he sat next to you, or his arm swung around your shoulders to hold you close, you felt like he wanted to be closer to you.

You knew that you should say no to him. That this wasn’t a good idea, that you were both a little tipsy on all that wine that was finished off, and that this could might not be a great idea. You never even really did this with your friends, you guys always posed clothed for each other.

Yet, you still found yourself giving him a nod, as you turned to face him. 

Relief washed over Harry, as he heard the word “Yeah,” leave your lips in a hushed tone. “Yes,” you repeated a little louder, as you flipped to a fresh page to draw on. 

Looking away from Harry, you again couldn’t help the blush that was creeping up your neck. What the hell were we doing.

You felt your mouth go dry when you looked back up at him. Shirt pulled off his shirt, and his trousers had been pushed down his legs, along with his briefs and pushed them to the side. Your eyes scanned his long legs, to his abdomen. You willed yourself not to stare too long at his newly exposed cock, but you couldn’t help but notice how long and thick he was; mind wandering as you imagined just how heavy he would feel in your hand, or mouth. 

Harry couldn’t help the small smirk that played at his lips as he watched your eyes scan him. Not wanting to make you any more uncomfortable, he quickly sat down on the chair facing you. “Sit however I want?” His voice broke the silence that had set in the room.

You nodded, trying to shake any dirty thought from your head as you shifted on the bed a bit, making yourself comfortable. “I’ll just do one I think, one pose for longer if that’s okay?” You finally managed to meet his gaze.

“’ Course.” He nodded, as he settled on a pose he was okay with staying in for a while, leaning back in the chair and crossing his bare legs. He didn’t mind sitting put in the slightest, loved watching you as you worked, as your eyes scanned his skin. 

You silently began your work, soft music from Harry’s phone being the only sound in the room. There was faint noise coming from the city outside, but you felt like the two of you were in your own world up here. The two of you sat in silence, only once and a while making small conversation, or humming along to whatever song was playing.

You don’t know how long you sat and drew him, could’ve been half an hour, could’ve been two hours. You don’t think your cheeks ever stopped flushing, being so close and so intimate with Harry like this.

When you finally decided that you were done, you folded your sketchpad placing it next to you and let your shoulders drop with a sigh. “’ M done.” You told Harry, watching his eyes perk up at the sound of your voice. 

His movements were slow, stiff from sitting in the same pose for so long. “Can I see? Haven’t shown me any drawings yet.” He moved up from the chair, and you couldn’t help your eyes drop down to his crotch again.

“I’ll put my pants back on I promise.”

You grinned up at him, feeling more at ease again after the initial awkwardness of when he had dropped trow in front of you.

“Yeah,” you grinned, oddly more at ease to show Harry your drawings now. You flipped through the book as he pulled his pants back on. You felt the mattress sink next to you as Harry sat down, leg against yours. You handed him the book, watching as he took in the sketches.  

You observed his reactions as his eyes skimmed over each line, turning the pages. He stopped when he reached the more detailed sketches from earlier this night, from before he got naked. He spent the longest time looking at them, not flipping to the last one yet.

“These are beautiful,” his voice held a slight rasp, as he looked up at you. 

“Narcissist.” You muttered, teasing him. “I’m serious,” he breathed out your name, along woth a humourless laugh. “They’re crazy detailed for the amount of time, but,” he trailed off, staring at them more intently. “I don’t know, you really just got me y’know?” He said, gazing back down to the drawing. “You just,” He trailed off again, not sure how to express what he was saying. “You captured me so well.”

Another blushed crept up your cheeks at his compliment. “Thank you, Harry. Really,” you smiled softly at him.

“’ Course love,” he smiled back. “You know I’m your biggest fan.” You trailed your eyes over his face, watching the way he smiled fondly at you, the way his dimple popped out, the way his eyes crinkled in his good humour. 

Finally, as your gaze met his once more, you watched his eyelashes flutter, pupils wide and dark. Before you could even think of biding your goodnights, Harry’s voice cut through your thoughts. “Stay again tonight?”

You had to bite back the smile building on your lips. 

You had already made up your mind at his question, of course wanting to spend another night in his arms. It was the look in his eyes, one you couldn’t quite place. His pupils dilated, as he looked up at you through lashes. “Please?”

 “Of course,” you breathed out, almost wanting to reach forward and push his hair out of his face, but thought against it. “Want to change first, I’ll be back in a sec.” 

Quietly walking to your room, you changed into your pyjama shorts and a loose tank top. Stopping by the washroom before heading back to Harry’s room, you gazed at yourself in the mirror. Your cheeks were still flush from the number of drinks that you had. Or maybe it was from being so close to Harry’s naked body for so long. Wiping your face down with cool water, you wiled the blush away before heading back to Harry.

He watched you walk back into his room, closing the door behind you. You smiled softly at him as he looked up to you. His eyes watched, his cock twitching in his shorts as your nipples noticeably press against the fabric of your shirt. Control yourself, he thought to himself. Harry knew he was already pushing his luck with you, especially keeping you here in his bed with him. 

You noticed he had the sketchpad still resting on his lap, sitting yourself next to him and obeying as he motioned for you to shuffle in closer to you; only happy when your side was fully pressed against his.

“Drew something for you.” Harry’s voice rumbled in your ear. 

You turned towards him, watching as he reached for the sketchpad that you had left. He flipped through it, finding the page he wanted to show you, tapping on the little mess of scribbles he wanted to show you. It was a small stick figure, with a few odd added features that you figured were meant to resemble you, with your name scribbled overtop. 

“What’s that?” You breathed out, small giggle in your voice. You pointed to a small mess of lines next to your name. “What?” Harry laughed from next to you. “Its a heart!” 

“Harry that does not look like heart.” Giggling as you glanced at him, watching his lips turn down to a pout. “Could be one,” he muttered, hint of a smile in his voice.

Harry flipped over the book on his lap, nude drawing of Harry in front of you. “This is seriously incredible,” he murmured, voice serious again. “Was it weird for you?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean,” he paused, glancing from the drawing to you. “Was it weird, drawing me naked and all?”

You bit your lips together between your teeth, not knowing where he was going with this, and not knowing what to say.

“Because I didn’t think it was. ‘M comfortable with you, y’know?” He mumbled, eyes not leaving yours. You had to glance down, feeling heat rush to your face.

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” you whispered, eyes stuck on the drawing that you had just done of him.

“Las’ thing I wan’ to do is make you uncomfortable, love.”

“Harry, I’m not...” The words died in your throat. 

As you turned your head to face the man next to you, your breathing felt like it had come to a stop. His face that was already turned towards you, was inches away from yours, noses nearly brushing.

You swallowed thickly, eyes flicking between his. His gaze was intense, eyes dark, a fact that you don’t think could be blamed on the wine anymore. You looked down to the sketchpad on both of your laps, as his hand smoothed over the paper until the tip of his fingers met yours. 

“Harry...” You could barely hear your own voice as you spoke his name, heartbeat drumming in your ears. 

“‘s just me, love,” his voice rasped in your ear, body shifting closer to yours as you watched his fingertips dance over your skin down on the paper in front of you. You could feel his nose brush over the top of your ear, lips only brushing on the skin over your jaw. 

Not moving, you refused to look up at him. Maybe you wanted to prolong his begging or maybe you were too afraid to make the first move, it was probably a bit of both.

He muttered your name on top of your skin, breath hot on your neck. He wasn’t so much pressing kisses on your skin, as he was brushing his lips on you. “It’s just me.”

“Please, love.” 

His voice was thick, tortured even. 

Bottom lip lodging itself between your teeth, you looked up at him. His eyes were rapidly searching your face, breath mixing with your own.

Within the blink of an eye, his lips met yours. 

Mouth so light against yours, he whispered your name. Tentatively giving you a kiss, a soft kiss, his other hand sliding behind your head. Fingertips lightly scratching into your scalp, letting out a small sigh as all he wanted was more of you. 

A sigh left Harrys lips as he whispered your name over your mouth again, leaving small, hints of kisses against your own lips. A whine built in his throat, calling you to be closer to him. Lifting a hand up to his cheek, you scratched your fingertips against his skin as your lips rested barely a millimetre apart, breath mixing together.

Warmth rushed through your body as his lips finally fully slid over yours, hot and eager as he puckered his lips against your own in small kisses.

Mind void from any other thought or worry you had before, filled with nothing but Harry as he filled your senses. A small gasp made its way from the back of your throat as Harry’s tongue heatedly pushed past your lips mouth gladly opening for him. Harry grazed into your mouth, arm around you pulling you closer to him.

Kiss growing in fervour since the hesitant brushes of lips it had started as, Harry could hear nothing but his heartbeat loud in his ears, along with the series of soft exhales and gasps that were leaving your mouth. The same mouth that Harry longed to feel against his, the same mouth that was currently pressed eagerly against his.

“Christ,” Harry grunted, voice low as you tugged on his hair. “Thinking about this…” he muttered against your mouth, lips briefly leaving yours to kiss the corner of your mouth, moving down to your jaw and then neck. His mouth open, breath hot, making your spine tingle with every wet kiss on your skin. “Wanting this.”  A sigh left your mouth as his teeth lightly nipped at the skin under your earlobe.

“Harry,” his name was a whine, pulling his attention away from your neck, as his eyes searched yours. Pupils wide, eyes dark and filled with desire, longing for you. His breath leaving his lips in small pants, chest rising against yours.

“Love, I –” He cut himself off, brow furrowing as he watched you intently, waiting for you to speak up again. You felt his hand on yours, still resting on the paper on both your laps, his fingertips grazing over your hand and moving up to hold your forearm.

“Harry,” you repeated, already feeling cold without his lips on yours, even as he sat almost completely pressed against you.

He watched as you freed your arm from his grasp, grabbing the pad of paper that had since been filled with drawings of Harry. He watched as you tossed it on the floor next to you. A long breath of air was pushed from his lips, his eyes remaining locked with yours.

He drew out your name, voice low, voice needy, as he followed your every movements. Shifting your body next to his, you lifted a leg over his lap, sitting yourself on his thighs as you straddled him. Free hand joining the other around his neck, you watched as a smirk tugged at his lips, eyebrows raising at you slightly. His expression had relaxed from a few seconds ago, when you had pulled away from him and he thought you were on the verge of running away. Instead he found himself even closer to you, chests pressed against each other, one hand gripping the nape of your neck and the other lacing around your waist as he kept you close.

“Want you too, Harry.”

A beat passed between the two of you, before your mouths molded together once again. Lips immediately hot against one another, Harry licking deep into your mouth as you returned his fervour. You felt his chest rumble with a moan against you, as your fingers tugged at his curls, loving the way it made him react against you.

His grip was tight on your waist, other hand moving away from your neck, gripping you wherever he could. You whimpered into his mouth as both hands found themselves over the curve of your ass, fingertips digging into your skin as it prompted you to shift your hips closer to his, heat rushing to your core as you rubbed over him.

“God love,” Harry groaned, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth, before pulling away from you to catch his breath. “You are…” his lips immediately found your skin again, grazing the skin under your jaw. “God I’ve dreamt about this.”

His voice was a whisper, a deep, raspy whisper that somehow made you radiate with even more heat against him.

His mouth moved over your collarbone, meeting the strap of your tank top, gripping it with his teeth as he moved it to the side and over your shoulder. One of his hands tugged at the hem of your shirt, pulling it down just enough to expose the top of your breasts. Lips following the curve of your chest, sucking and nipping the skin that had been newly exposed to him.

You moved one of your hands away from the back of his head, open palm smoothing his exposed chest. The room was hot, the air between the two of you searing hot, but somehow Harry found himself shivering as your nails gently trailed down his chest.

Hips inadvertently rolling over Harry’s as his large hand still gripped your ass, you could feel the heat radiating off him, could feel him grow harder underneath the thin layers of fabric that separated the two of you. Hand guiding your hips to repeat the action, Harry groaned against your skin, lips finding yours once again.

Hand trailing up under your shirt, calloused fingers stopping by your ribs. The whine into his mouth as he pressed hot, sloppy kisses onto your lips, was the only urge he needed to grab your breast in his hand, tugging at your nipple between his index and thumb. Back arching at his action, pressing your chest against his hand as you craved more of his touch.

“Can feel you,” you panted, voice nearly incoherent as you trailed your mouth away from his. Tongue gliding over the skin of his neck, you caught the skin under his jaw between your teeth. “Can feel you everywhere.”

Pulling away from his neck, you tugged at his hair, watched as his eyelids fluttered open. The sight of you before him was enough for him to let out a low moan. Your lips red and puffed, eyes glazed over, tank top falling off of your shoulders.

Harry’s appearance matched yours, hair tousled, his eyes gazing at you zealously. “Can I,” he rasped, fingertips trailing over your waist. “Can I touch you.” His words were almost more of a demand rather than a question but he still didn’t move, waiting for your answer.

You quickly nodded, not trusting your voice to be coherent. He leaned in again, mouth over the shell of your ear. “Gotta tell me love.”

Clearing your throat, your voice sounding hazy as you muttered into the air. “Want you,” Harry pulled his mouth away, gaze meeting yours again.

“Thought about yours fingers on me, want them.”

His mouth hanging open for a second, before scurrying a hand around the band of your pyjama shorts. Fingers trailing under the waistband, you breathed out his name as he fingers moved slowly, barely brushing over your skin.

“Harry,” you groaned, rutting your hips forward, feeling yourself absolutely throbbing for him.

You watched his face, watched a grin line his lips as he watched you writhe on top of him. He loved watching you like this, knowing he would never be able to get over seeing you on top of him, pleading for you. “Please.”

“Tell me what you want, love,” he rasped. “Tell me what you’ve thought about; thought about me doing to you.”

Another whine was heard from your mouth, knowing he was loving having you so powerless to him, even as you sat on top of him.

You swallowed thickly, licking your lips before agreeing to what he wanted. “I – I’ve thought about your fingers, on my clit.”

You gasped as soon as you spoke, feeling his index finger press through your folds until it met your clit. He rubbed light, slow circles on it, before stopping to urge you on. “Then what?”

“I thought – I want you to feel how wet I am.” Your lips moved towards his skin again, sucking softly as you made yourself down his neck and flattened both hands over his chest.

“Jesus fuck,” Harry groaned your name, finger pushing itself through your wetness. His palm flattened against you, moving slick finger back to your clit. “So wet, dripping for me, hm?”

Your answer was a moan, rejoicing as he applied pressure on your clit once again. “For you…” You mumbled circling your hips on Harry’s hand as he rubbed slow, hard circles on your clit.

“All f’me,” Harry muttered to himself, quietly, repeatedly, as if he couldn’t believe it.

And truthfully, he couldn’t believe. So many times, he pulled his eyes away from you, not wanting you to notice him staring at you. So many times, he thought about you as he held his cock in his hand, your name lacing his moans. So many times, he held you close any chance he got.

Now here he sat with you situated yourself on top of him, lips hungrily nipping at his skin; his hands down your shorts as you impatiently moaned for him.

His movements on your clit speeding up, your kisses getting sloppier as whimpers fell freely from you mouth. Suddenly stopping, his voice above you pulling your attention away from his chest and back to his face.

“What next, love?”

“In me,” the words left your mouth in a rush. “Want your fingers inside of me.”

He followed your words, middle finger sliding down your folds, slowly pushing into you. Watching you react to him, he smirked as your eyes fluttered closed, sucking your lips in between your teeth.

“Like that?” His finger pumped slowly inside of you, curling roughly in a way that made you collapse your chest against his.

“Yes,” you breathed out, feeling him find a pace, as his thumb moved up to press small circles on your clit. You pressed yourself against him, circling your hips on his finger as you craved more of him. You could feel him hard under you, the thought of him hot and heavy making you clench around his finger. “More,” the word was strangled, as you panted on top of him.

Harry soon slipped in another finger, stretching you wider. You loved the way he felt inside of you, moan slipping past your lips at the thought of how his cock would fill you. The image of him bare in front of you earlier on that night flashed through your mind, imagining how he would look now, full and hard for you.

You felt the building of an orgasm in the pit of your stomach, heat rushing through your body. Harry’s pace on your clit increased, feeling you clench around his fingers.

“’ m close.” You moaned, although Harry already knew. He watched as you clung to him, nails digging into his bare chest. Your breath was heavy, small whines building in the back of your throat, and you tried to bite back your moans, mostly unsuccessful in doing so.

He pushed his fingers deep inside of you, curling them and hitting that spot that made you gasp his name. “Harry I –” you warned, unable to hold back your climax.

“Go ahead,” his lips neared your ear, urging you on. “Want you to come for me.”

You pulled your head from his chest at his words, meet his gaze. Harry reveled in the way your eyes were glazed over in desire, cheeks red as he moved to push you over the edge.

Your lips slotting against his, you left lazy kisses on his mouth before feeling your jaw go slack. Orgasm coursing through you, you stilled your hips, feeling yourself clench around his fingers. Nails digging into his chest, lip biting down onto his bottom one, you tried to stifle the moan that had been building, released from your throat as Harry made you cum.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he watched as your tried to regain your breath, grip loosening on him as you detached yourself from him. Harry pulled his hand from your shorts, watching his fingers coated with your arousal. Your eyes followed his hand as he moved his fingers into his mouth, moan rumbling from his chest as he tasted you.

“You’re incredible,” he muttered, wet fingers gripping at your thigh. He leaned in, kissing you slowly, deeply. You hummed against his mouth, as if returning his comment. You trailed your hands down over his shorts as you kissed him, palm sliding over his covered cock.

You trailed your hands down over his shorts as you kissed him, palm sliding his covered cock. You felt him jerk against you, lips pulling away from yours for a second.

“I – don’t worry about me love,” Harry murmured, hand rising to cup your face. “I mean, we don’t have to keep going.”

You smiled up at him, moving in to press a small kiss to his lips. His concern over you comfort moved you, but you did want to keep going.

“Want to though,” you said as you pulled away from his mouth. Smile on your lips, words slow as you spoke them. “Want to have you inside of me.”

Harry’s mouth hung open for a second, your name rumbling in the back of his throat. His ears were ringing, all his focus set on you in front of him.

“I…” hands brushing along the skin on his waist, needing to remind himself that this was really happening, that you were really sitting here with him, asking him to fuck you.

“If you want,” you quickly added.

“You,” he pressed chaste kisses along your cheek, until his lips met you ear. “You want me to fuck you?” His words were slow, drawing out every word, leaving goosebumps down your neck.

“Yeah,” you sighed into the air, wanting so badly to feel him closer to you.

“Harry I – I want you to fuck me. Please.”

His fingers dug into the hips at your words. “Such a dirty mouth,” he gulped, inhaling sharply.  

He kissed you, desperate and hard against you. “Take this off,” pulling at the hem of the thin tank top barely covering your chest, wanting to feel you completely against him.

Obeying, you broke apart from him for a beat to tug the shirt over your head, throwing it to the side. His eyes immediately dropping down to your newly exposed chest, hands sliding up your ribs to grab at the swell of your breasts.

Head dipping down, lips leaving kisses down your skin, sucking softly. You hummed appreciatively when his lips circled around your nipple, tugging it between his teeth. His hand grabbed at your other breast, massaging and tugging at the skin.

Your own hands scrapped over the band of his shorts, fingers dipping past the waistband of his briefs, flattening your palm over his bulge, hand wrapping around him. You remembered the way he looked naked in front of you, thinking that he would feel thick and heavy in your hand. And you were right.

He felt even bigger in your palm, hips bucking into your hand. Moving your hand down his shaft, thumb rubbing over his tip collecting the bit of precum that had gathered. He mumbled your name, pulling his head away from your chest as your other hand tugged at his hair.

You moved down his lap a bit, shifting away from him enough to pull his shorts and briefs down his thighs, shifting for him to kick them off and to the floor next to you.

Your mouth gaped open, watching as his cock laid thick and hard against his abdomen. He smirked at you, watching as you were unable to pull your eyes away from him.

Staring unashamedly as your hands reached forward to wrap around him once again.

“Earlier,” Harry groaned, hips bucking into your hand. “Took everything I had to not get hard, when you were drawing me.”

You hummed at his words, pleased to hear you weren’t the only one thinking of lunging on the other, when he sat naked for you as you drew him. He watched as you lifted yourself on your knees, fingers pushing on your shorts as you tugged them over your hips, hooking each leg out of them as they joined the clothes on the floor.

“Fuck I…” Harry groaned, eyes scanning your bare body. “I don’t have a condom.” He met your eyes, sudden panic filling him. “ ‘m clean I swear, I would never…”

You nodded, cutting off his rambling. “Me too,” right now wanting nothing more than to feel him inside of you. “Clean, I mean. ‘M on the pill too.” Words barely a whisper as they left your lips, voice hoarse. “Harry please, want you in me.”

You shuffled closer to him on his lap, raising your hips so your folds slid over his cock. He pressed a long heavy kiss to your lips, muttering against your mouth.

“Christ love, you’re gonna be the death of me.”

A hand placed over yours, he gripped the base of his cock, as his other hand held your hips against him. Moving your hands to his shoulders to hold yourself, as you slowly sank down around his length.

The two of you let out shaky breaths, your cheek resting against his shoulder as you felt him fill you. You paused, not used to his size. “You okay?” He muttered onto your temple, waiting for you to move against him.

Lifting your head, you nodded weakly, slowly circling your hips over him. One of his hands moved to grip your ass, as the other held tightly to your waist. He was pressed tightly against you, skin hitting yours as your chest quickly rose and fell.

“So full,” you choked out, watery eyes meeting his. Harry felt his cock twitch inside of you, seeing you completely falling apart on top of him.

“S’okay, love.” He murmured softly, head dipping down to press a kiss to your shoulder. “Take your time.”

You lifted your hips on his, moving on him in slow, hot movements. Your head burying back into the crook of his neck. You could feel him everywhere, skin completely flush against yours. He was so deep inside of you, hitting deliciously in all the right places.

You set a slow pace, feeling him rub everywhere inside of you. Harry’s hips pushed into yours as he moved with you, trying to stop himself from roughly thrusting into you.

Harry loved the sound of the pants, laced with small whines as they left your throat. He wanted to hear nothing but that, along with the way you called his name as you felt him everywhere inside of you.

“Such a pretty cunt,” he grunted into your ear, lips kissing and teeth tugging at your skin. “Taking me in so good.”

Hips rocking over his, you tried to speed up your pace, wanting to feel him tight against you. “Harry,” your throat rasped, voice strangled as you spoke his name, fingers tugging at his shoulders.

“Harry,” you said louder, tugging tightly at his hair. “More,” was the only word you were capable of forming, hoping he could understand your strangled words. “Want more.”

Gripping your thighs tightly, Harry gave no warning before rolling you over. You suddenly found him flush on top of you, hair dangling in your face as he pulled you in for a kiss. Large palm hooking itself under your knee, pulling your leg up as he urged you to hook up legs tightly around his waist.

He groaned at the contact, feeling himself even deeper inside of you. “Good?” He asked, checking with you before moving.

Muffled moan being heard from you as you quickly nodded, wanting him so desperately to move.

Moving his hips on yours, his hips snapped back against yours in short rough thrusts into you. You clenched around him at the new contact, eliciting your name to fall from Harry’s mouth in a short strangled cry.

“Don’ fucking do that,” he said, voice clipped and pausing for a second, before continuing his deep thrusts into you. “Wanna las’ for you.”

He continued his momentum over you, as you arched yourself to be closer to him, fingers digging into the skin on his back. Only sounds to be heard were of skin against skin, and with breathless heaves mixed with the moaning of names, and the panting of curses and calling to gods.

His hands were everywhere on you, palming over your breasts, your thighs, your hips. His fingers dug into the skin of your ass, pushing you up to meet his skin, your back arching as you whimpered at his pressure.

Harry bowed his head, looking down where his hips connected to yours. He found it so incredibly hot, as he watched himself sink in and out of you. His name was falling freely from your mouth, calls getting louder, spurring him on. He wanted nothing other than to watch you unravel for him again.

“Fuck Ha –” you whined. “Harry more, more.” Small tears forming in the corner of your eyes once again, getting caught in your eyelashes as you squeezed your eyes shut.

You felt your second orgasm building in you, unable to hold back. You moaned especially loudly as you felt a hand snake in between of your bodies, long finger dragging onto your clit, pressing, rubbing at it deeply.

“Tha’ s it love,” he mumbled, watching you grow more frantic under him. Head ducking down again, this time to connect his lips to the skin your chest, biting as he urged you on. “You desperate?” He continued. “Want me to fuck you hard? Want to cum around me?”

You were overwhelmed with sensation, having him fill you so tightly, his finger rubbing on your incredibly sensitive clit, his hair tickling your jaw and his mouth licking and biting at your skin.

So completely overwhelmed with the bubbling climax in the pit of your stomach, your gripped onto Harry so tightly you were sure to draw blood under your nails.

“Go on love,” Harry urged softly, the grin evident in his words. Your eyes were squeezed shut, teeth digging into your lips as you tried to stifle the moans of his name.

The combination of Harry hitting the same spot repeatedly inside of you, your senses filled him. The hot heat from his skin, his voice in your ears, his cologne. It was all too much for you, as you felt him push you towards your climax.

“Harry,” falling apart under him, you writhed as you held him close to you, walls clenching around his cock. He fucked you through your orgasm, pace slowing down as his felt himself start to twitch inside of you. Your thighs squeezed him tight, ankles hooking behind him as you thrust your hips up into his. Arms were wrapped tightly around him, nails dragging into his skin. You felt dizzy, eyes squeezed shut as you couldn’t help yourself from crying out.

Slowly, starting to calm down from your climax, Harry watched as you opened watery eyes, gazing up at him with nothing but lust. Sense of satisfaction filling his head as he moved to kiss the corners of your eyes, wiping away the small tears that spilled over.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he groaned your name, knowing he wasn’t going to be able to last for much longer. “You’re unbelievable.”

He kissed his way down your face, his lips buried in the crook of your neck as you quietly urged him on, voice hoarse as you wanted him to finish inside of you.

“Cum f’me,” you rasped, eyes lazily gazing down at him, moving a hand up to brush through his hair.

Pressure unbearable for Harry, he halted on top of you, only movement being of his hips grinding tightly on yours as he fell off the brink. You could feel him pulse, hot bursts as he came inside of you. His teeth dug into your shoulder, your name hot on his lips as he let out heavy pants. He praised you endlessly, words nonsensical as they spilled out of his mouth. He was a mess.

Eventually lifting his head, eyes hazy as he grinned down at you and pulled you in for a sloppy kiss. Staying like that for a moment, neither of you moving as you lay tight against each other. Shaky arms pushing himself up, he pulled himself out of you, and rolled over to his side.

“Le’ me get you cleaned up.” He mumbled, eyes trailing over you as he watched the mess he created at the corner of your thighs.

“Don’t worry,” you whispered, rising on the bed. You turned to the edge of the bed, legs wobblily as you situated yourself on your feet.

“Coming right back, yeah?” Suddenly worried that you might already regret what the two of you just did.

“‘Course,” you giggled, before shuffling out of the room and into the washroom. After peeing and cleaning yourself up the best you could, you caught a glance of your reflection in the mirror.

You had sex written all over your features. Lips dark and swollen, eyes hazy and hair a mess. Marks on your breasts from where Harry had sucked, already turning purple.

About to leave the washroom, you paused in your steps. You could hear the rest of the group, you could hear the key slid into the lock. As quietly as you could, you ran from the washroom to Harry’s room, quickly closing the door behind you.

Turning around, you saw Harry lounging back on the bed, pair of briefs now covering his hips. He had tossed the sheet on the floor, replacing it with a new one you assumed he had grabbed from your own bed.

You scurried over to grab your discarded clothes on the floor, looking up as Harry made a sound of protest. “Want you to wear my clothes,” he said, pointing up to where he had set some of his own clothes for you to wear.

You grinned at him, bringing your finger to your mouth in a shushing motion, trying to tell him the others had come home, thinking it was probably best that they thought you were asleep instead of naked together.

Pulling the boxers and shirt on, you quickly shut off the lights in the room and slid on the bed next to him. “They’re home,” you whispered, accepting his arm that pulled you closer to him.

He didn’t say anything to that, pressing a small kiss to the top of your head. “You okay?” He said instead, trying to read what you were thinking about what just happened.

“Yeah,” you mumbled against him, small nod of your head as you couldn’t help your grin at his concern for you. “Tired.”

“That was,” Harry’s chest resonated under your head as he spoke. “That was unbelievable, yeah?”

You could feel him watching you, unmoving. You lifted your head, eyes meeting his. “Yeah, it was.” Your voice was shaky with a laugh, still in a daze.

You felt him sigh against you, body relaxing with yours as you settled your head back against his chest. “Good,” he muttered, so quietly you nearly missed it, before you drifted off to sleep.

                                                              ***

Harry woke up before you.

His arms were still wrapped around you, bodies flush together, sunlight filling the room.

His left arm felt a bit numb, as it rested underneath your head, but he didn’t mind. The two of you had fallen asleep almost immediately the night before, as soon as you rested your head on his chest you had dozed off, Harry following quickly as he watched your chest rhythmically rise and fall.

He hadn’t had time to properly reflect on the time you guys had together the night before, the time you guys spent with hot lips and wandering hands. Harry had thought about sex with you before, more than he’d like to admit. But the one thing he never really got around to thinking about, was what would happen afterwards.

Not wanting to move around too much to wake you up, he lifted his head up to glance around the room. Clothes were scattered around the floor, along with the sketchbook that was thrown aside when you had moved to sit on his lap.

Head hitting the pillow once again, he tugged you closer to him as he replayed the events on the night before over and over again in his head. For as long as Harry thought about it, dreamt about it, nothing compared to the reality. The way you had gasped, whimpered and whined for him, the way you had clung to him so tightly. The way you had fit so perfectly with him. Harry couldn’t believe it.

Just as Harry thought about what to say to you when you woke up, you stirred in his arms. He froze, trying to slow his heartbeat down and maybe pretend he had just woken up as well.

He didn’t know why he was so stressed all of the sudden, but he couldn’t help but think that maybe you would slide out of his arms and pretend like nothing ever happened. He watched as you rolled onto your back, Harry’s arm sliding across your stomach as you moved.

Your eyes were still shut, and for a second Harry thought you were still asleep.

“Can feel you watching me,” your voice suddenly broke him out of his daze.

Not being able to help the grin breaking out on his face, he didn’t try to hide the fact that you had caught him. He hummed, now that you were awake finding the chance to move his arm from under you. “M’ arms numb.”

You felt his arm wiggle out from under your head, shaking it out when it was free. He rolled over onto his side, still facing you and making sure to keep his other arm wrapped over your waist.

“Sleep well?” Harry watched as you rolled over onto your side, facing him.

“Yeah,” he spoke lowly, voice still raspy from sleep. “Real well.” He watched the gleam in your eyes as you returned his smile, nodding.

“I’m bummed you’re leaving tonight,” he muttered, fingertips gliding under the loose shirt that hung around you, thumb rubbing circles on the skin of you hip.

“You’re leaving too,” your eyebrows shot up, voice soft but tone loud.

“Yeah,” Harry’s voice drawled the word out, bottom lip between his teeth as he bit back a smile. “But we’re headin’ different ways. Not goin’ to see you for a bit.”

“Won’t be that long.” You grinned up at him, although sharing the sentiment. “I should shower,” you mumbled, shooting Harry a grin before turning over in the bed to then roll off, standing to your feet. Harry watched as the sun filtering through the window hit you, he couldn’t help but admire the way it made you glow.

You shuffled on your feet, legs the tiniest bit unstable, as you reached for your scattered clothes on the floor. “Should get some pastries for breakfast, yeah?” Harry’s voice pulled your attention back to him.

“Definitely,” you beamed at him, pausing before opening his door as you listened for anyone else being out.

“Y’look good in my shirt, love.” Harry spoke once more from behind you. Smile widening, you sent him what you hope was a subtle wink, before slipping out of his room and heading to the washroom.

Harry sank back down into the mattress as the door closed behind you, hands running over his face. Fucking hell, he thought to himself. The smell of your perfume still overwhelmed his senses, surrounding him and the sheets around him.

“Christ,” you muttered to yourself, glancing at your appearance in the mirror. Red and purple marks along your breasts from where Harry had bit and sucked, you were glad they were just low enough to be concealed by clothing.

Stepping into the shower, your mind played the events from the night before over and over again. Remembering the ways his hands hand trailed all over your body, gripping and pulling at you. Biting your lip as you recalled everything, he had muttered to you, how much he told you he wanted you, and how much you had returned the sentiment.

After all these years of knowing each other, all the subtle glances at each other, all the lingering grabs and wandering hands, this had felt right.

You quite frankly don’t know why it had taken so long. You kicked yourself a bit for not making a move sooner, but you knew that you couldn’t find it in yourself to be the one to initiate anything. You also knew that Harry probably took so long to make a move because you gave unclear signs, but that was neither here nor there.

Deciding to push any worries out of your mind for now, thinking that it would be best to deal with it when the time comes. Instead, you got ready for the day after your shower.

Pulling on a floral sundress, you kept Harry’s shirt in your room, knowing that you could get away with taking it from him before you guys parted ways.

Harry was true to his word, and had headed out to grab some delicacies for breakfast. Everyone out and ready to eat, you joined them at the table that sat in the sun on the balcony.

As you sat around the small table, you and Harry sharing looks, knees bumping. Harry reveled at how normal everything felt. There was no awkwardness, nothing felt weird or uncomfortable. You weren’t avoiding him, or acting strange around him.

Although it being a good thing that neither of you were uncomfortable, Harry realized that there had been basically no mention of the night spent together. Although the very rational thought that it had been mere hours since the two of you had slept together, only being awake for a couple of those hours.

Everything about that was extremely rational, but Harry still wanted to say something, anything to just bring it to air. He didn’t want you guys to bury the night into nothing, into something that you would once and a while remember but never say thing about.

“You got a hickey on your tit.”

That’ll do it.

Figuring the opportunity would present itself as you headed to the kitchen to grab some more peaches, Harry had followed. He wordlessly watched as you bent over to grab the little produce bag across the counter, his eyes dropping down to low cut of your dress where he noticed the little marks he left on your skin the night before.

Shooting up at his quiet words, you felt a blush creep up your cheeks as you looked down, both hopping to hide the blush and to fix the neckline of your dress, so that the top of your breasts were covered.

“Looks good on you,” he mumbled quickly after, after you didn’t say anything.

“Stop that.” You muttered, knowing your cheeks were glowing red as you thought back to a mere twelve hours ago when Harry had his mouth sucking on the skin on your breast. Harry couldn’t help the smirk that dawned on his lips, watching you flush as he reminded you of the feeling on his lips on your skin.

“Seemed to like it.”

Harry watched as you grabbed a bowl for the fruit, holding it against you before stepping past him. “Why do you think I wore such a low cut dress today?”

                                                              ***

Two bottles of prosecco had been shared in the early afternoon, a last little celebration of sorts before the realization that everyone had to pack. It had been such a nice afternoon, almost a perfect ending to the time you guys had spent here in Italy.

Almost.

Harry was dying to get you alone.

Pacing around his room for a second as he was itching to storm down your door. Why hadn’t he kissed you.

During a morning of quiet glances, teasing smiles and light touches, Harry had been so focused on trying to talk to you, or show that everything would be okay, that he never found the opportunity to kiss you. He was supposed to be packing up his things, or at least starting to pack up, but he couldn’t stop thinking

The next time Harry would see you would be in a rushed goodbye, before you head over to the train station. After that, who knows when the next time you will see each other. Realistically, it wouldn’t be that long. But the way it stood right now, both yours and Harry’s schedule were so erratic there was really no telling.

The sketchpad on the floor caught his eye. You hadn’t retrieved it from last night, and it still sat on the floor where you had tossed it. Quickly grabbing it, he walked down the hall to knock at your door.

As the door opened, Harry suddenly felt breathless.

“Hey,” he exhaled. “You forgot this.”

Walking into your room as you stepped aside, quietly shutting the door behind him. He didn’t know why it felt so intimate, standing together in a closed room, but as soon as the door clicked closed, he felt his cheeks warm.

He glanced around your room, seeing that you hadn’t gotten that far in your packing either.

“I uh,” Harry stumbled over his words as you remained fairly quiet, grabbing the sketchpad from his hands. “I hate packing.” He grinned, happy to see your shoulders shake with a laugh as you agreed, sliding onto your bed.

“Me too,” you scoffed, not even wanting to be faced with everything you had to shove back into your bag. “Plus, prosecco’s making me sleepy.”

Harry tentatively sat next to you, watching as you flipped through the pages of your sketches. “You should keep the drawings of you.” You mumbled, starting to tear the pages out. “If you want.”

“You gotta keep this last one,” Harry’s voice was a quiet, as he watched you flip to the last drawing you had done of him, probably no less than twenty-four hours ago when he sat naked in front of you.

You didn’t miss the smug smirk that grew on his lips, as he glanced between you and the drawing that sat in front of you.

“And what do you suppose I do with it?”

“I’ll leave that up to you love.”

His eyes lingered as neither of you spoke for a moment too long. You jumped up suddenly, moving back towards the door as you knew you could easily be swayed to have Harry stay in your room.

“I should pack,” your voice coming out quieter than intended. Harry slowly rose from the bed, watching your turn to reach for the doorknob to usher him out of your room.

“Oh …!”

His hand came to grip your elbow, catching you by surprise as he pulled you closer until your body faced his.

Your eyes catching the gleam in Harry’s eyes as he puled you closer to him. “What are you…?” You watched as he shushed you, hand sliding down your arm until it gently held your own. You slightly fell back to lean against the wall behind you, hand remaining intertwined with Harry’s but just slightly moving back from him.

“Still wearing m’ shirt.” Was all he mumbled to you, as you glanced down to the shirt covering your body. It was the shirt Harry had put out for you last night as you crawled back into bed with him, shirt you had pulled on today as you went to pack up your clothes.

“Oh,” was all you could say, meeting his gaze again, expression unreadable. “I – I’ll get it back to your before I go.”

Eyes holding his, you watched with some relief as a grin dawned on his lips. “Love,” he drawled out, hands reaching back out to you, grabbing hold of your arms, fingertips trailing down your skin until his hands clasped with yours.

“As much as I’d like you to take your shirt off for me right now,” his smirk deepened, dimple on his cheek, tugging you to him. “Keep it.”

“Harry,” his name was a whisper from your lips, trying to bite back your growing smile.

“Just wanted,” he mumbled, instinctively licking his lips. One of his hands let go of yours, sliding around to the small of your back.

Your breath hitched as he moved in closer to you, mouth suddenly on yours. You leaned in against him, hand reaching up to his jaw. He kissed you slowly, tongue smoothing against yours as he gripped into the fabric of his shirt that hung off your back. Your body was completely embracing his, responding and returning his every movement.

His kisses were slow and hot, drawing you in for more the longer you went on. They were different from yesterday, not as urgent but just as fervent. He left you completely breathless as he pulled away for a moment, face staying inches away form yours.

“Just wanted a taste,” he rasped, hand squeezing your hip. “Kicking myself for not kissing you all day.”

“Needed an excuse to come on over, just to kiss me?” You giggled, still slightly breathless.

“Well,” he grinned, hands resting just under your shirt as his thumbs rubbed small circles onto the skin of your hips. “Didn’t want to just barge into your room, not very gentlemanly.”

“I uh,” he paused, not giving you a chance to say anything. “I’m really gonna miss you.” Your expression softened at his words, cheeks warming up. “Going to miss you too Harry.”

“Meant what I said las’ night, too.” He hummed, as every dirty thing he muttered to you flashed through your mind. “Wanted you – wanting you,” he quickly corrected himself. “I – I think about you all the time, love.”

Cheeks warming even more, you thought over his words. “You don’t have to say anything,” he added. “I just,” he pulled his lips between his teeth for a moment. “Jus’ needed to say something.”

“Harry… don’t worry about it,” you whispered, voice soft as his words made you smile. “I, uh, I meant what I said last night too.” You spoke quietly, almost unsure of yourself.

A smirk returned to Harry’s lips. “What exactly? Said a lot last night, love.” Memories of you begging, and whining for him rang through his ears. He watched you take your bottom lip between your teeth, hesitating before speaking.

“About – everything.” You breathed out, not trusting yourself to say too much. A beat of silence passed between the two of you.

“I should really pack. I leave in nearly an hour.” You mumbled, knowing that if you didn’t say anything he might end up in the bed with you.

“Wait!” Harry said, voice louder as he stopped you from leaving. “Humour me love,” he paused, beaming at you. “What exactly from what you said last night?”

“Need a good ego stroke that’s it?” You grinned, shaking your head at him.

“C’mon love,” he grinned down at you as you shuffled closer to him, chest pressing against his as you glanced up at him. “Bore my soul to you, least you can do no?”

You perched your head up, lips nearing his ear. “Well,” you paused, lips brushing over the skin of his jaw. “Meant what I said about thinking about you,” pausing, you moved closer to his ear, voice dropping. “Filling me, making me cum.”

Harry visibly gulped; eyes intense on you. “You are,” he paused, leaning forward as his mouth chased yours. “Incredible.” The word was muffled as his mouth found yours. His grip on you tightened, one hand sliding on your skin, under your shirt, until it met the small of your back again.

Harry kissed you heavily once again, mouth hot, silently calling you closer to him. “Jus’ one more, yeah?” He mumbled; voice low as he only pulled away for a second.

Just as he said, pushed himself close against you and left one long, deep, kiss to your mouth.

He brought a hand up to your cheek, holding your face still, holding your gaze. “So incredible, y’know that?”

“Think you mentioned that.” You grinned, already missing his mouth on yours.

“Got to tell you again,” he mumbled, pressing a chaste kiss to your mouth. “Consider this a going away present.”

Harry gave your hand one more squeeze, before reaching for the doorknob. You couldn’t stop the smile still tugging at the corner of your lips, the feeling of Harry’s mouth still on yours.

You were glad to know that the both of you were seemingly on the same page, both attracted to the other. Part of you knew that nothing was really clear with you guys, that both of you had said that ‘nothing would change’, but that was something to worry about later.

For now, you reveled in the way his lips moved with yours, the way his hands tugged you closer to him.

Rushing through your packing, as you felt yourself stuck in a daze. Part from a sudden hit of exhaustion, part from the effect Harry had left. You told yourself that you would sleep on the train, the ride being longer than it needed as it passed through Switzerland and made multiple stops before you reached your destination.

Finalizing everything that needed to get packed up, you headed over to the kitchen to grab some food for the ride. You had bought some extra pastries and fruits for yourself yesterday, knowing you would want to eat during your ride.

You were surprised to see Harry already in the kitchen, shuffling around as he placed fruit into a little bag. “Hey,” he smiled up at you, beginning of a setting sun glowing orange from behind him.

“What are you doing?”

He grinned, passing you the bag he was holding. “Some food for your trip.”

Sucking your lips between your teeth, you try to hide your smile. He had already prepared you a little bag of treats, one that you were going to grab for yourself. “Thank you,”

After trying your best to quickly pack, you spend the little time you had left to draw a little something for Harry. You were a bit nervous, thinking that maybe you shouldn’t slip the folded drawing into Harry’s things. But now, you were certain you needed to.

“One sec,” you mumbled, stepping away from him and quietly making your way back to your room. Grabbing the folded paper where you had left it, you went to head over to Harry’s room to place it with his things, but found Harry waiting for you in the hallway.

“Open this later,” you whispered, sliding it in his palm.

“You better be ready to go!”

Voice pulling you away from Harry, as the rest of your group crowded around you, swarming you with hugs and goodbyes.

Harry had pulled you in extra tight with his goodbye, as you sank into his arms. He muttered a quiet “goodbye love” into your hair, not wanting to let you go. Still, he knew he had to pull away, fingertips trailing down you arms as he didn’t want to fully let you go.

He did have to let go though, and you did have to leave.

After you left, Harry made up some excuse about wanting to finish packing now, before shutting his room door behind him. Fidgeting with the paper still in his hands, quickly unfolding it.

Fuck.

His mouth gaped open as his eyes focused on the drawing you had done for him. Eyes skimming over every line and detail on the page, all coming together to shape your figure.

Your very naked figure.

It was your entire body, slightly bent as if you were sitting back against the head board of a bed. One leg folded up as the other one extended out, knees just slightly parted. It was all done just in pencil, just like the sketches you had done of Harry. Your face in the image wasn’t too detailed, but unmistakably you. The sketch was all a bit rough, lines skewing out everywhere, but Harry didn’t care.

He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the drawing, feeling his cock twitch in his pants. He almost felt bad, like he shouldn’t be getting hot and bothered from such a delicately sketched drawing. Although nude, there was something so elegant about it. This wasn’t something quick to get off on, it was something for him to really remember you by.

Still, as he took in every curve and bend in your body, remembering the way his hands felt on you, the way your body felt with his, he felt his mouth go dry. He picked up his phone, wanting to text you even though you had just left.

“Beautiful drawing as usual.”

You glanced down at your phone, rereading Harry’s text for the fifth time. You chewed at your lip, unable to keep the smile from your lips. Having just arrived at the station and already having purchased your ticket before hand, you made your way to wait for your train that had yet to arrive.

“Just something to help keep you occupied.”

Just as your phone buzzed in your hands, your cheeks warmed as you read is words.

“Trust me love, won’t be able to get you out of my mind.”

[jaskiersvalley]

Hello!! 💕 Just wanted to let you know that I love your "Jaskier has always smelled of blood" au. It means a lot to me 💛 I feel like it brings some kind of awereness to the issue and I'm really gratefull for it. Thank you 💕

Nonnie, thank you so much for your kind words. That AU is one that I spent a lot of time mulling over and debating whether to write it or not. But given the fact that it means a lot to you, it was most definitely worth it. There is actually another topic that has been on my mind a fair amount that is as heavy as that AU, which is what happens when a suicide attempt doesn't succeed. Hopefully you won't mind if I write that as a little thank you for your lovely ask.

CW: Suicide attempt (overdose of Witcher potions)

Love wasn't meant to be part of a Witcher's life. That was what Eskel had always been taught and he accepted it as his lot in life. When he was younger, he had raged against it, tried to defy the truth. He attended parties, wooed and seduced wherever he went. Love never stuck but at least his lust was sated. Then Deidre happened and Eskel had a new reality to get used to, one where he was seen as monstrous, hideous and repulsive. Those were just Lambert's teasing words, trying to exaggerate and poke fun at the situation. Not that it helped. Suddenly, Eskel could only attend masquerade balls where his face was hidden from view for fear of upsetting humans. It was either that or finding hungry and desperate succubi who valued his Witcher enhanced attribute more than his visage. It didn't stop Lambert from cracking jokes.

"You don't have a succubi problem, you just have a succuebae. Get it? Before anyone else!"

It was easy for Lambert to say, brothels still took his coin if he wanted it. Though, by the sounds of stories, he didn't need to frequent such places, not when he had a Cat Witcher travelling with him and eager to share all aspects of the Path, not just the pay for contracts. Still, Eskel couldn't begrudge Lambert, he'd always had a shit lot in life. If he could buck the rule about love, good for him, he deserved that slice of happiness.

Then Geralt had to go and find himself a bard who was devoted to him. Eskel could smell the pining on Geralt over winters and then love when Jaskier finally spent the winter with them. That was fine too. Much like Lambert, Geralt also deserved someone to love and share his life with. Even multiple someones when Yennefer arrived and had no need of a room of her own.

It was fine. Eskel could be happy for them. He wasn't jealous, didn't feel like he'd been cheated out of anything. Those were thoughts he turned away from every night when he pulled his covers tight around him and pretended he didn't wish it was the warm embrace of a lover, probably much like the other two had.

Things got worse when Eskel started getting left out of things. There were games that the happy couples played in the evenings, something about how well they knew each other. It was raucous and fun by the sounds of it. Eskel stayed in the kitchen, cleaning because it wasn't a game he could play. The double dates looked fun, going out on rides. Once Yennefer even opened up a portal for them to spend a night away for some romantic getaway. The bard about Eskel bringing Lil Bleater had stung more than he cared to admit. Slowly, Eskel was forgotten. Vesemir had his books, was content with those and the letters he seemed to send. If Eskel was lucky, he'd end up like him. But Eskel didn't want to become Vesemir in his old age. Not even Vesemir really, not when Eskel didn't even have friends to exchange letters with.

The bleakness of it ate away at Eskel for years. Each time he returned to Kaer Morhen without a travelling companion, without someone to write to, he felt like a failure. To the point that he tried drinking, tried fisstech, anything to forget, even if just for a little while. Nothing worked though, every time reality caught up with him. There was only one solution he could see, one where there was no tomorrow to wake up to. It wasn't a rash decision, Eskel didn't immediately act on those thoughts. But his mind was made up and with that came a sense of relief. He had a few things to get in order, to figure out but there was now an end in sight, a way out and on his own terms.

One last winter he made the trek to Kaer Morhen. He had a tidy pack of coins, some truly excellent Gwent cards and a large stash of potions he had brewed up. All in all, he looked like he had a good year on the Path. Nobody needed to know that all his external riches were a façade for the poverty of his heart.

His plan was a simple one. It wasn't like a Witcher left a will or anything like that, his measly belongings got scavenged when he didn't return from a contract. That wasn't what Eskel wanted, he was going to make sure all his belongings were going to go to the person he wanted them to end up with. Which was why he started with Gwent. He played Geralt and, slowly but surely, lost all his best cards. Eskel prided himself in how he could play so well that they others believed he was having a bad run. Couple it with drinking some of Lambert's brew, it was an uproarious night full of laughter, friendly slaps to his back and loudly declared sympathy for his poor, alcohol addled brain.

Once the good Gwent cards were gone, Eskel switched out, claiming he needed someone lesser to play because Geralt was just too good. As predicted, Lambert took great offence at being called a worse player and shoved Geralt out the way. Eskel bet money, a nice pair of gloves and, in an almost unheard of turn, Scorpion.

"I needed to leave you with things to barter with for the rest of winter," he told Lambert with a smile. "Because I'll be winning it all back in the coming weeks, with interest on top."

The laughter that went up at that was nice. Eskel was satisfied all the worthwhile things in his possession had found good homes. Vesemir had already taken the spices and seeds he had returned with, along with the small mountain of foods that would keep them well fed over winter. What Eskel didn't expect was the hugs and pats to his back as they got ready to get to bed.

"It was nice to see you smiling and laughing again," Jaskier commented.

"This was like the old days," Lambert agreed, rubbing his knuckles over the top of Eskel's head viciously.

Aiden clasped his shoulder and gave it a squeeze with a smile. "Good to have you back."

It wasn't like Eskel had ever left, he had been there all those years, it was the others who didn't want him. It didn't matter now though. They'd had one final night together, it all went well. Eskel waved goodbye to them all, heart heavy but also light. He couldn't have asked for a better final evening.

Back at his room, he sat down on his bed and looked around. There wasn't much left. The furs and throws were all down in the communal areas, he'd migrated those down over the last couple of weeks. His armour wouldn't fit anyone and it wasn't suitable for reworking for the others. It would be the perfect thing to wear to his funeral pyre so he pulled it on one last time, taking a deep breath as the familiar scent of worn leather enveloped him. All the potions he'd brought back with him were lined up on his bedside table. He knew what he was doing. The others would understand, maybe even take it as the gift he meant it to be. He wouldn't be the odd one out anymore, the loner who brought the group down by hanging onto their coattails. They could have their double dates, their romantic getaways without having to worry about him or feeling guilty for leaving him behind.

The first potion was Cat, he downed it, feeling the world shift into larger clarity in the darkness of his room. It didn't sit heavy in his stomach, three potions were fine to take, four was when the toxicity began to affect him. Though Eskel was a large man, he could probably deal with about six potions before he became ill. It was why he had fifteen little bottles lined up, one worse than the other in terms of toxicity. Next, a Maribor Forest slid down his throat, followed by a Lapwing. They were all conflicting potions, making his body shake. Brock tasted foul but it was still better than Rook which made Eskel's heart pound. Taking a break, Eskel settled back on his bed, head spinning. He could feel his whole body shaking with unspent energy the potions teased out of him. It felt horrible, his stomach roiled. Without his attention on some creature and the fight for his life, Eskel couldn't help but focus on the way his joints seemed to itch, his muscles tingling.

Five potions weren't going to be enough. Reaching for another bottle, Eskel knocked back two Thunderbolts in a row. He gagged but pushed on, head swimming. Virga at least tasted a little better. It was wiped out by the Nekker Warrior Decoction. The world was fuzzy, Eskel whimpered a little as his muscles seized and cramped and his stomach ached. He'd rarely taken enough potions to even flirt with the edges of toxicity, to deliberately do it was agony. This wasn't how he'd expected it to go, he thought he'd take them, lie back and go to sleep. Pain was not part of the deal but he would shoulder it, this was his choice. A couple of the empty bottles clattered to the ground as he reached for the next one. Most of the Black Blood went down his chin as he spluttered. Leaning against the headboard, he closed his eyes, willing the wooziness to go.

Maybe to took more potions, maybe they were dreams, he didn't know. What Eskel did know was that he woke up in his bed, the sun shining bright in the sky. Head pounding and stomach churning, he could smell stale vomit in the air. Rolling onto his side, he threw up over the edge of his bed. Breathing shaky, Eskel coughed miserably and spat to clear the bitter taste from his mouth. Judging by the state of his floor, it wasn't the first time he had thrown up but it was definitely the only one he could remember. Flopping back onto the bed, Eskel covered his face with his palms and choked back on a howl of frustration. He couldn't even kill himself properly.

The problem was, Eskel had no plans for what to do if he failed. He'd been so certain that he would go to sleep and never wake up again. At a loss, he fell back onto habits and routine. He was already dressed in his armour which was acceptable clothing to go downstairs for breakfast. Nothing heavy, he couldn't face the idea of eating anything. But a drink of water would do him good. Stumbling into the kitchen, he grunted a greeting at the others who seemed to be having lunch. Of course they didn't notice he hadn't gotten up for breakfast. Either that or they just didn't care.

"You're dressed ready for war," Lambert joked but the smile on his face froze when Eskel looked at him. "Woah. You look like shit."

Geralt was out of his seat and grabbing Eskel by the chin, giving him a close inspection and a less than subtle sniff. Whatever he detected had him tensing up and glancing to Lambert who looked alarmed too.

"Let's get a bit of food in you," Geralt rumbled and guided Eskel to the table where Aiden's face turned stricken. Even Jaskier and Yennefer looked solemn, their usual rivalry nowhere to be seen. In fact, everyone seemed intent of giving Eskel the attention he didn't crave.

From the doorway, Lambert called, "Geralt" and stepped back. But the clink of bottles in his hand and the hushed, hurried conversation gave away the fact Eskel's dirty secret had been found out.

"I'll go clean the room but he's not going back there. Not alone," Lambert growled. The others around the table didn't even bother pretending they weren't listening in.

Vesemir's footsteps approached and Eskel wished fervently that the potions had done the job. Especially as he listened to the conversation.

"What's going on here?"

"It's Eskel he-" the clink of bottles followed again, Lambert no doubt showing Vesemir the evidence of Eskel's shame.

"I see." Vesemir rumbled softly and walked into the kitchen. He sat down next to Eskel, not saying a word. However, he squeezed his shoulder and swapped out the tankard of water for a warm tea, adding a dash of honey to it. "Geralt, get a Golden Oriole from the cupboard."

Eskel could only watch as it was added to his tea, heart sinking. Nobody said anything. Not even when Lambert returned, looking a little green in the face. He sat down, squirming in the silence.

"Are we not going to say anything about it?" He asked in the end. "We can't just pretend it never happened."

"We won't," Vesemir replied, voice warm but also full of warning. "But there's a time and place for everything. Right now, our priority is the physical. The Golden Oriole will help. Then Eskel will go and have a lie down in front of the fire to sleep and let his body heal."

It was so much easier to follow Vesemir's instructions than have to think for himself. Eskel hadn't thought he'd see the sun again, hadn't thought he'd have to worry about things like daily chores and ways to spend the long hours of a day. At some point he must have finished his tea because the mug was empty but Eskel didn't remember it. He was ushered towards the pile of furs and throws from his room and he sank into them, exhausted already. He was only half awake as he heard the conversation around him while a throw was carefully draped over him.

"How could he do this?" Geralt hissed, sounding angry for the first time. "Why would he do this to us?"

"I'm sure we'll find out." The reply from Vesemir was soft and calm. "But what we need to focus on is helping him realise it was a good thing he didn't succeed."

"What if he tries again?"

"We have to hope he doesn't. He won't be alone for the next few weeks, we'll take turns keeping him company. And hope that we can do enough to make him want to stay." Vesemir was oddly calm and resigned. "I've seen others do this before. We can only hope to counter the darkness that has befallen his mind."

Lambert joined the quiet conversation. "But he seemed so happy last night. In fact, he's been the most at peace in years. I thought he was getting better."

Even half asleep, Eskel could understand the words, appreciate the thoughts behind them. But he didn't know if the plan would work. He doubted the others would understand or would be able to do anything to help him. After all, they still had their partners, lovers and each other. All Eskel knew for certain was that if he tried again, he'd do something with an assured outcome. He just hoped the others would understand.

[cyclogenesis]

i have to tell you that the second i saw cal and ash on that mountain getaway a couple weeks ago, i thought about how desperately i would love a sequel to your turks & caicos fic set during that trip. (this is not a request, i promise, i just wanted to tell you bc that is one of my fav fics of all time)

Aw anon!! 🥺 Gosh I hadn't even thought about that when I was in my feelings about the mountain getaway pictures, which is wild because I am just remembering now that I started a fic after the honeymoon comment initially happened (like, very soon after, because @elliebirdthings was at that show and told me about it and we were freaking out haha), before we knew that they went to Turks & Caicos, and I had them taking that trip to a cabin in Maine.

Just for kicks, because this message made me smile and I love you for that, here's the beginning of that fic. It's unfinished obviously (not even any kissing!), but there's some nice stuff in there I think. This fic was going to be titled A whole fucking lifetime of this after the American Pleasure Club album which was a title I should have kept, goddammit. Also randomly in here I have them driving to the cabin while listening to My Bloody Valentine, who Ashton later called out as one of his main influences for Superbloom.

1600 words of unfinished Cashton under the cut! 😘

The day after the last meeting about the promo schedule the dressing room conversation turns, as it does, to plans for the break. It’s a month out, but they’ve to a man developed a fetish for planning their free time carefully as soon as the schedule’s set. Planning things makes Ashton feel like a grown-up. He likes renting cars. Sometimes he scrolls through AirBnB for hours just to see what’s out there.

“I’m going straight back, we got Dodgers tickets,” Michael says.

“I remember when you used to say ‘we’ and it meant you and me,” Calum says. He wiggles a little from where he’s snuggled against Michael on the couch like he wants to get away, but of course Michael doesn’t let him. Ashton thinks he probably wasn’t really trying.

“Aw, you’ll always be my first love,” Michael tells him, squeezing Calum to him more tightly. “You wanna make out just for old times sake?”

“I do not,” says Calum, but he lets Michael give him a big kiss on the forehead, his face squinching up happily.

“I just wanna get away for a bit, no work or social media or anything,” says Ashton, ignoring their tomfoolery. “A little cabin by a lake somewhere.”

“Oh yeah?” Luke says. “Where are you and Cal going this time?”

“Maine,” Calum says, at the same time as Ashton says, “Why would you assume we’re going somewhere together?”

A small silence falls over the room.

With dignity, Ashton says, “Calum and I are going to Maine.”

“Just get out in front of it this time,” Michael advises. “Let everyone know it’s another honeymoon. Take control of the narrative.”

“How many times can you go on a honeymoon before you have to acknowledge that you’re married?” Luke asks nobody in particular.

“It’s a bro trip,” Ashton says firmly. “For bros.”

“It’s very bromantic,” Luke says. “It’s okay, I’m not hurt I wasn’t invited. I love going back to LA and jerking off alone.”

“It’s nice that we’ve all got plans,” Calum says. He’s settled peacefully back against Michael, Michael absently petting his hair.

“It’s not a honeymoon,” Ashton insists.

*

Whatever, Ashton called it what he called it, okay? Might as well control the narrative.

Over drinks at the bar after their last show Calum asks, “Where would you want to go on your honeymoon, anyway? Somewhere new?”

Ashton pokes at the ice in his cocktail with his straw. Aren’t they supposed to not be using straws anymore because of the ocean or whatever? Ashton loves the ocean, it’s very important to him. Also this cocktail sucks. “Can I try your drink?” he asks. “I don’t love mine.” Calum has something with ginger in it, and bubbles. Calum slides his obligingly over, and Ashton passes his own over to be fair.

“I like yours better,” Calum says after a sip. “You wanna trade?”

Sometimes Ashton does believe in soulmates. “Yes, thank you.” He takes a long drink. “It would be nice to spend more time in Italy. Not one of the tourist-y parts though, somewhere quiet. Up north, maybe, one of the smaller towns.” He tries to picture what it would be like: olive groves, blue skies, stone churches. An old villa with lemon trees and a view of the hills. He’s so used to traveling with the band or just with Calum that it’s hard to picture anyone else there with him. They’re all as prone as anyone to get swept up with girls to the exclusion of most everything else, but Ashton can’t really imagine a future without seeing Calum all the time, without talking to him every day. Maybe he and Calum could just get married around the same time and they could all go on a honeymoon together.

“Yeah, that’d be pretty nice,” Calum says, looking wistful. Ashton wants to take a picture of him, capture the way a curl rests against his temple, how the blue neon lights behind the bar hit the glitter he let Ashton smear on his cheekbones before the show. They made a no social media pledge for this trip but Ashton’s bringing his camera anyway. He has to keep in practice, doesn’t he? Anyway, it’s important to capture these memories.

“Maybe we should just go,” Ashton tells him. “Why not? Who knows how long it could take for me to fool someone into living with this forever?” He sucks down the last of his drink, feeling sorry for himself now. What if he falls in love and she moves in and Calum stops coming over in the morning to walk to their favorite coffee shop together, and stops picking Ashton up so they can go hike Runyon, and stops bringing Duke over like he owns the damn place and doesn’t care about the dog hair that Ashton has to hoover off his couch pillows? That would be terrible. Worst of all, what if it was Ashton that suddenly wanted those things to stop?

“I’ll live with you forever,” Calum says, too busy flagging down the bartender to intuit Ashton’s emotional crisis. He gestures to Ashton’s empty drink. “Another one of those, right?” His own is still half full. Maybe he didn’t really like Ashton’s better after all.

“Yeah, thanks man,” Ashton sighs.

Calum bumps his knee against Ashton’s, the barstool squeaking beneath him. “Ash, you’re gonna find somebody if that’s what you want. Anyone would be the luckiest person alive to be with you. Maybe we could do Italy after the tour wraps, we’ll finish in Spain so it won’t be far.”

The thought cheers Ashton a bit; that’s a decent amount of time to get on AirBnB and see what he can find that’s available. It’ll be nice to have something to look forward to, Italian sunshine and limoncello and the quiet.

“Mike and Luke will definitely give us shit though about planning another honeymoon while we’re still on this one,” Calum says.

“Let ‘em,” says Ashton.

*

It’s not a long flight but it’s a bit of a drive from there to get to the cabin. But Calum said he wanted something remote and quiet, so it’s worth the wait, the drive in the dark. There’s moonlight, anyway, and Calum took the wheel, getting them the rest of the way there in their little silver Prius rental. He puts on My Bloody Valentine and sings along, low and comforting to listen to after so many days straight of playing, of promo. Halfway through the trip Ashton thinks he sees a shooting star, maybe thought he dreamed it until he felt Calum’s soft nudge of knuckles against his arm, heard his quiet, “You see that, bro?”

The way gets bumpy, thick with trees, dark and hard to navigate once they turn off the main road. At the end of it all there’s the cabin, looming in the dark, lights left on for them and the key exactly where it’s supposed to be. It’s past one a.m. but they still give the place a wander, stopping at the largest bedroom facing the lake. Through the floor-to-ceiling windows Ashton sees trees, darkness, the black glitter of water under starlight. Calum asks, “You want this one?”

Ashton looks further and just sees more darkness. “It’s kind of unnerving at night,” he says. “Anyone could be out there.” The other bedroom has smaller windows, but the point stands. “Do you wanna just watch TV or something in here and then decide?”

“If we get axe murdered here I hope our ghosts come back and leave a one star review,” Calum says, but he’s already shrugging his duffel off his shoulders and kicking off his shoes.

The host left them a bottle of pinot grigio so Ashton pours up a few glasses while Calum strips down to his boxers and gets in bed. The boxers have cartoon pugs all over them. “I can’t believe that’s the lingerie you’re wearing for our honeymoon,” Ashton says, handing him a glass. “I also can’t believe those boxers even exist.”

Calum raises it to him in a salute and takes a sip. “These boxers are fantastic, but I guess if you want me to take them off…” he trails off, eyebrow raised, thumb hooked in the waistband pushing them down past his hipbone, then further until Ashton can see the crease of his thigh.

“No, no,” Ashton says hurriedly, “I’m just saying, what’s wrong with a nice pair of footie pajamas? Keeps you warm. Keeps you modest.” Nevertheless he shucks his own clothes except for his own (very grown-up, perfectly normal, in a flattering shade of dark green) boxers and joins Calum in bed. Calum’s already stopped paying attention to him, too busy trying to figure out how to work the remote. He finally gets the screen to flash on, and Ashton stays quiet, sipping his wine while Calum flips channels, finally landing on something in black and white. Cary Grant comes on screen but Ashton still isn’t sure what movie it is; Calum seems interested enough, setting the remote down between them, so he doesn’t complain. The wine goes down easy and Ashton does too after not too long.

He rolls onto his side and sees that Calum’s eyes are already closed. It doesn’t look like he’s asleep yet; it always takes him a bit, leaving him in a dozy stage for about ten minutes during which he might respond crankily to any communication or with adorable mumbling affection. Ashton turns the sound down and says, as quietly as he can, “TV off?” Calum’s eyes don’t open, but he nods a little. “Okay. You want me to go sleep in the other room?”

Calum moves then, a sleepy shift of his body, fumbling a hand up and blindly patting the sheet until he makes contact with Ashton’s hand on the remote and squeezes it, links their fingers together like he can’t quite figure out how to make it work. It feels nice. “’S’okay,” he murmurs. “Stay here.”

Ashton didn’t feel like getting up anyway.

[holylulusworld]

Getaway car

Summary: A story like Bonny & Clyde that’s what you wanted with him. Sadly, life gets in between you and your Clyde…

Pairing: Criminal!Dean x Criminal!Reader; Mobster!Dean x Reader

Warnings: angst, language, abandonment, crimes, robbery, unrequited love?, a hint of fluff

A/N: And again, Taylor Swift inspired one of my stories. This time it was ‘Getaway car’. Lyrics are taken from her song.

The first time you laid eyes on him was at the diner you were working your shift. He stalked toward the counter, ordering pie and went home with you instead.

It was crazy, dirty, and rough but he left you wanting more. Weeks later he came back, wanting more and more until you followed him…

He was the best of times, the worst of crimes

I struck a match 

And blew your mind, but I didn't mean it

And you didn't see it

The ties were black, the lies were white

And shades of grey in candlelight

I wanted to leave him

I needed a reason

Three years later you lean against the wall at the bar, your smile long gone, just like the excitement and adrenaline after another successful raid. 

The last bank should have been the last. Retirement, a future, that is what Dean promised to you but lately, you got the feeling you will end up like all his other partners before.

Dropped at a motel, fifty bucks on the nightstand and brokenhearted as he found a new ‘Bonnie’.

You believed him when he said you are the one. You desperately wanted this life with him, but things change – so does Dean.

Right now, he leans closer to the bartender, that million-dollar smile which once melted your heart on his plump lips. The only difference, this time he gives it to that girl - his next partner as you assume.

It pains to admit you were just that, a young girl he could corrupt and use as a distraction during his raids until you lost your usefulness; until he found a younger and sexier girl to use.

You do not know where or when you lost it, but you know it’s over when he gives the girl a wink, snickering at something she said.

One last time you glance at Dean, ignoring the ache in your chest before you turn your back on him to leave the motel bar. 

X marks the spot

Where we fell apart

He poisoned the well, I was lyin' to myself

I knew it from the first Old Fashioned, we were cursed

We never had a shotgun shot in the dark

In a haste you count the money, leaving half of the bait, two-hundred thousand bucks, for Dean on the motel bed. The keys to his car, you take them with you to get to the next hideout.

One last deep breath and you place the note for Dean onto the pillow, placing the necklace he gave you on top of it.

“Goodbye, my Clyde…” You leave the room, not looking back, hurrying toward the getaway car Dean stole a state ago. He won’t miss the rusty car, already having another in eyesight to escape if need. 

Dean’s hand trembles when he enters the motel room only to find you gone. He waited the whole evening for you to show up, the engagement ring he stole at the bank burning a hole into his pocket.

“Goodbye, my Clyde,” Dean sniffs reading the note. “How could you believe I want to replace you, sweetheart?”

Dear Dean, my beloved Clyde,

I believed you when you said this is the last time. Sadly, I had to watch you hit on the next girl to be your Bonnie. I know, I was just the next best girl you found for your heists, but I will always remember our time.

To me, you are the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I am sorry that I was not enough for you to not stray.

I left half of the bait, Dean, and took the car. You will not miss the rusty wreck, I know you will find a new one in a blink, just like a new partner.

I will try to fulfill my dream with my half of the money. Please, if you ever felt anything for me, do not go after me to get the money back. I earned it as much as you did.

I will always love you.

Your Bonnie…

Tears cloud Dean eyes re-reading the letter until he falls onto the bed, sighing deeply.

You were drivin' 

The getaway car

We were flyin'

 But we'd never get far

 Don't pretend it's such a mystery

 Think about the place where you first met me

 We're ridin' 

 In a getaway car

 There were sirens in the beat of your heart

 Should've known I'd be the first to leave

 Think about the place where you first met me

“So…where is your special girl, Dean?” Looking at the money onto his table Sam swallows thickly. “Dean?”

“She left, believing she’s just a random partner. I didn’t use her as bait, Sammy. She was the one, the one that got away,” Dean opens the little black box to show his brother the diamond ring.

“The money, it’s enough to get back into the business and to pay for the house,” Dean nods, not meeting his brother’s eyes. “You did all this to get dad’s business back. We should try to use what you got. I brought my half too, twenty million.”

“Got thirty, Sam. Just give me a day or two. I need a bit of time,” watching his brother leave the room, a frown on his face Sam nods, understanding the heart-wrenching pain to lose the woman you love. 

“We talk tomorrow or the day after tomorrow. Take your time, Dean.” Sam gives his brother as cracked smile watching Dean stuff the ring back into his pocket.

“She left, took the getaway car, and never looked back. What if I never find her, Sammy? What if she’s gone for good?”

In a getaway car, oh-oh

No, they never get far, oh-oh-ahh

No, nothing good starts 

In a getaway car

5 years later … somewhere in the middle of nowhere, Rocheport, Missouri

“Y/N, I’ve seen my old dog walk faster than you serve our customers. I have to rethink your position in this diner,” your boss nags once again. 

It is not as if you didn’t work 12 hours in a row to make more money or that the diner is crowded, and you are the only waitress.

“I’ll try to work faster,” you reply, biting your tongue to not lose yet another job.

This small-town is a nightmare but your car broke not 10 miles out of town, so you had no other choice but to stay here, make some money until you find another town and another shitty job.

Five years ago, you had a plan, the money and motivation to have a better life. Two months in running your shop, a bakery, someone bought the building opposite your tiny shop, destroying your dream in the blink of an eye. It did not take more than a month to lose all your customers to the impressive café.

Without money left you grabbed your stuff and fleed out of town, no dreams in your pocket this time. You drove from town to town. Worked to make a few bucks to hit the road to nowhere again.

Looking back at that night, the night you left Dean you regret that you never talked to him. Maybe, just maybe he would’ve changed his mind and kept his promise.

It was the great escape

The prison break

The light of freedom on my face

But you weren't thinkin'

And I was just drinkin'

While he was runnin' after us

I was screamin', "Go, go, go!"

But with three of us, honey, it's a side show

And a circus ain't a love story

And now we're both sorry

(We're both sorry)

“What can I bring you, Sir?” A tall man wearing an expensive suit looks up at you, a soft smile on his lips. He doesn’t quite fit in. Men like him prefer an expensive restaurant, not a shady diner.

“Coffee, black. Please,” you nod, writing his order down whilst the man glances at your nametag. “Y/N, nice name.”

“Oh-well, my mom gave it to me,” the man smiles again, taking the menu you offered to him. “If you want anything else, tell me so when I bring the coffee, Sir.”

“Sam, just call me Sam.” You mirror his smile, believing he is new in town and tries to be polite. Usually, your customers bark their order at you only to not give a tip or to spill their coffee onto your apron.

“Anything else, Sir?” Sam shakes his head, paying the coffee and take-away pie, handing you a huge tip. “Thank you.”

“Must be hard to work at this place,” you nod, giving him a cracked smile. “Why does a girl like you work at this place?”

“Had a dream years ago, but it didn’t work out. You know, I had a nice little bakery but someone else opened a better, bigger, and more colorful place. I lost,” he nods, offering an apologetic smile before he gets up.

“Sometimes things are meant to end and sometimes,” he dips his head to look at you with soft eyes, “things turn out for the better.”

X marks the spot

Where we fell apart

He poisoned the well

Every man for himself

I knew it from the first Old Fashioned, we were cursed

It hit you like a shotgun shot to the heart

Your shift is almost over when the bell above the door rings again. Your boss wants to bark at the person entering the diner after closing time but oddly, he turns pale.

“Something wrong, boss?” He shakes his head, choking out the word gun. You don’t want to but you force your body to turn around only for your to look into the barrel of a shotgun.

Two large men entered the diner, wearing black clothes and masks they crowd the diner. “You, come over here!” The smaller of the men barks at you, jerking the shotgun toward the place next to him. “Hurry or I’ll give your boss a brand-new hole.”

“Do it bitch,” your boss barks and you hurry toward the man’s side, sniffling. “At least you are not useless this time. We got around five hundred in the register plus her tips in the jar under the counter.”

“Classy to tell us about her tips,” the man next to you spats. “Come here, Y/N. I need to make sure you do not try anything stupid.”

You nod, walking toward the man who immediately wraps one arm around your waist, pressing his lips to your ear.

“Did you miss me, sweetheart?” His deep voice, the way he husks the pet name into your ear and his cologne let your knees buckle. “I’ve missed you, Y/N. I’ll bring my Bonnie home now.”

“Got it,” Sam smirks, showing Dean the money and your tip jar. “Let’s go and buy drugs,” Dean snickers at Sam’s words, holding you flush against his firm chest.

“Okay, you son of a bitch will stay where you are and not call the cops. We will take your sweet waitress to make sure you do not try anything,” Dean leads you out of the diner whilst Sam aims his shotgun at your boss. 

“Do not move or she dies…”

“How? I…” Lips quivering you watch the man you met at the diner carry your few belongings out of the motel room you inherit. “How did you find me? Will you kill me now? I…I don’t have the money…”

“Sweetheart,” Dean pecks your forehead, running his hands up and down your back to calm you. “I needed 5 years to find you, Y/N. I never wanted to replace you, my Bonnie.”

“You flirted with that girl,” you sniffle, hiding your face in his shoulder. “I thought you want to get rid of me like with the other girls before me.”

“There were no other girls before you, Y/N. I lied, okay. In the beginning, I needed a partner as my brother left me. I wanted to keep our relationship strictly professional.” You giggle, looking up at Dean.

“After you had me bare that first night? Very professional, Mr. Clyde.” Dean hums, pressing his forehead against yours. “I’ve missed you, Dean. There was not a single day I didn’t think about our time together.”

“Missed you too, sweetheart. We should hit the road before the cops arrest us for stealing lousy five-hundred bucks.” Sam snickers, pointing toward your now empty tip jar.

“I left the money with the poor boy at the reception. I think he never got a larger tip before.”

“Whoa…you invested the money better than I,” your eyes round, following Dean toward the family mansion he bought five years ago.

“I got our house from the bank and my father’s business back with the money. Sammy paid his half and we are back in business.” Dean leads you inside, holding your hand the whole time. “Now I got everything I ever wanted.”

You bite your lip, glancing at the tiny black box Dean holds in his hand. “I wanted to give you this five years ago.”

“Dean…” You gasp, looking at the little handcuffs. “Did you want to arrest me?” He smirks, getting the silver keychain out of the box.

“If you prove you will not run away again,” he whispers, glancing at your lips, “I’ll give you the ring I stole for you…”

You were drivin' 

The getaway car

We were flyin'

But we'd never get far

Don't pretend it's such a mystery

Think about the place where you first met me

We're ridin' 

In a getaway car

There were sirens 

In the beat of your heart

Should've known I'd be the first to leave

Think about the place where you first met me

In a getaway car, oh-oh

No, they never get far, oh-oh-ahh

No, nothing good starts 

In a getaway car

“I don’t think I’ll need a getaway car again, Clyde,” you press your lips to Dean’s, wrapping your arms around his neck. “I am your Bonnie if you still want me…”

“Next time you need a getaway car, take me with you.” Dean deepens the kiss, not letting up until you gasp for air. “But I think, we are safe for now…”

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@lovefromthewinchesters​

@coffeebooksandfandom​

--------------------------------------

Dean/Jensen Forever Tags   

@spnfamily-j2

@supernatural-bellawinchester​

@negans-lucille-tblr​

@deans-baby-momma​

@thefaithfulwriter​

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@multisuperfandom​

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@psychicforest​

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 @waywardrose13​

@team-free-will-you-idjiot​

@myopiamystical​

@rintheemolion​

@isthatabutterfly

@bluecornflowers

@rosalynshields

A/N: If your name is crossed out Tumblr won’t let me tag you.

[reyescarlos]

look after you || a buddie fic

❄️ @911giftexchange fic for @bombera      hey, tori! i'm wishing you the happiest of holidays! this year has truly been one for the books so i hope this fic will help to end 2020 on a good note for you! it kinda ran away from me but i hope you’ll enjoy! ❄️

word count: 4.7k || read on ao3

You've begun to feel like home, yeah What's mine is yours to leave or take What's mine is yours to make your own

Infamously December is known to be a hectic month but now, with just a little over two weeks until Christmas, Eddie is feeling the pressure. His work schedule leaves little to no time for him to prepare for the holiday season, time slipping through his fingers with such ease that it had come as a surprise to see just how close he and the rest of the world were getting to the big day.

His concern was bad enough but this last week his mind has been additionally preoccupied with worrying over his son who is the latest person to come down with the bug that’s running rampant. If he isn’t at work, he’s right by Chris’ side, doting over him and doing his best to insure his comfort.

Throughout it all he has had Buck, his best friend and confidant, a man he can share virtually any thought with. All, really, but one. Eddie groans internally. His unspoken feelings for Buck are the last thing he needs to dwell on now. But the thought is far easier to think than put into practice with Buck sharing this space with him. Even on his day off Buck opts to spend time at the Diaz house, an additional set of hands that Eddie is beyond grateful for at such a time. Buck has long since been a staple in his home and now, more than ever, he’s grateful for his companionship and help to keep him from going under. Buck seems to understand him in ways very few can, sensing his needs and thoughts without a single word uttered.

He can feel Buck’s eyes on him as he pops two slices of bread into the toaster but he focuses on his task, doing his best to keep his head on straight though his mind is a riot of thoughts.

Eddie massages the back of his neck to relieve some tension, stretching it a bit as he draws in a breath.

“Alright, what’s going with you?” Buck asks.

Eddie turns back to face him and shrugs. “It’s nothing. I’m just trying to figure out a game plan. I still have to finish holiday shopping but you’ve seen our schedule for the next two weeks. We’re practically going to be living at the station.”

“But we have today off and it’s only noon. That’s plenty of time for you to head out there while I stay here with little man. See? Simple solution.”

“It’s your day off. I couldn’t do that.”

“I can watch him, it’s not a problem,” Buck insists.

Eddie hesitates. It’s a great offer, one that would quickly remedy his dilemma. “I don’t know, Buck. It’s a big ask. It’s short notice and he’s sick.”

“It’s not a big ask. It’s not even an ask at all; I’m volunteering. And besides,” Buck says, puffing up his chest. “Buckleys don’t catch colds.”

Eddie’s mouth twists to one side in thought. Today really is the one true window of time he’ll have and it’ll certainly be easier to stealthily buy Chris’ presents without his observant son being able to see what he’s purchasing. Resigned, Eddie nods slowly, knowing this is the best offer he could possibly have.

“Alright, yeah, okay. I’ll try and hurry back but still, I know it’ll be a few hours until I’ll be back home.”

Buck rolls his eyes. “Would you relax? Take all the time you need, seriously. Chris and I always have a blast together. We’ll be just fine. I promise.”

“No, I know he’s good with you. I just…”

“Suck at accepting help, yes, I know,” Buck teases, patting him on the shoulder with one hand and gesturing towards the front of the house with the other.

“Go. I’m officially kicking you out. Don’t forget to get me something nice, yeah?”

~*~*~

Eddie returns home with a trunk full of presents after a very successful trip to the mall. He’s managed to get for everyone on his list and the relief he feels in having this task officially scratched off his to-do list is a major weight off his shoulders. He carries a few bags in with him to the house. From the moment he steps inside he can hear the raucous laughter of Christopher and Buck coming from the living room, his son breaking into a small coughing fit afterwards.

Eddie stashes his purchases into the closet, hiding the bags under his jacket in a feeble attempt to bury it for the time being. Buck and Chris carry on chatting and Eddie is certain that neither of them realizes he’s gotten back, so wrapped up they are in their conversation.

“Maybe we could go to New York like Kevin next year for Christmas? Me, you, and Dad.”

Eddie feels his body tense and he stays in place, curious as to what Buck’s response will be.

Eddie could easily picture it, the three of them taking on the city. The images that flood his mind teem with warmth and joy and sincerely, Eddie would love nothing more than to wrap himself in that. But a trip that elaborate wouldn’t be a casual thing between friends, at least not for him. It’s one thing to have Buck over at his place or for them to go on outings around LA with Chris on weekends. A Christmas getaway would carry far more weight. It’s something that families do. Something twinges a bit in Eddie’s chest at the thought. Somewhere along the way, without Eddie even fully realizing it had solidified itself, that’s precisely what Buck has become to him, and apparently Chris too.

“Now there’s an idea. I would love to go with you guys. Sure you wouldn’t mind me tagging along?”

Chris is quick to respond, casting away any trace of doubt. “Nope, the trip wouldn’t be the same without you.”

Eddie can hear Buck sigh. It’s clear just how touched his best friend is by Chris’ sentiment and Eddie would have to agree with his son. Any trip, any facet of life really, is so much better when Buck is thrown into the mix. He’s so interwoven into the fabric of their life, it’d be hard to picture any moment, big or small, without him there experiencing it with them.

“See, this is why you’re my favorite Diaz. Don’t tell your dad I said that though. It may break his old man heart,” Buck laughs, Chris joining in.

This melody is Eddie’s favorite sound, the lightheartedness of his two favorite guys sharing a private joke. It’s the little things like this that light him up, that fill him with a warmth so vibrant and strong that it takes every ounce of strength in him not to sit Buck down one day and have a serious conversation. But Eddie has never been good with words and in a case like this, for a topic this important, he knows a talk like that would be best handled with care. Whenever, or rather if ever, that day comes, Eddie hopes he’ll be prepared to handle it. Instead he’ll stick to this, to cloaking his feelings for the sake of keeping the scales balanced.

“With laughs that big I’m guessing someone is feeling better?” he says aloud, essentially announcing his presence.

He steps into the living room and sees the space has been transformed. A giant fort is set up in the center of the room and at the mouth of it is Buck and Chris stretched out side by side on pillows from the couch and Chris’ bed. It looks like the coziest of setups and Eddie isn’t at all surprised to see that Buck got creative in trying to make Chris as comfortable as possible.

Chris slaps on an innocent smile but Buck apparently has a harder time schooling his features.

“Eddie, you’re back. I didn’t even hear you come in,” he says, picking up the remote.

The end credits for Home Alone 2 flit by on screen. Buck hits pause as Chris reaches for the DVD of A Charlie Brown Christmas.

“Can we watch this one next?” he asks Buck who’s already nodding.

“Oh, definitely. This is one of my all-time favorites. How about I get you another bowl of soup and then we can fire this one up. Sound good?”

Chris gives him a two thumbs up and flops back against the pillows, plucking a tissue out of the box and wiping at his nose. Eddie frowns seeing his son so sick but the best he can do is continue supplying him with medicine and fluids to help him through it.

Buck carefully climbs out of the fort and walks over to Eddie, the two of them going into the kitchen.

“How’d your shopping go?” Buck asks as he opens the fridge and takes out a container.

“Really well. I managed to get stuff for everyone on my list, including a certain pest I know,” he jokes the second Buck opens his mouth, no doubt to check about the status of his own gift.

“Well, I’m glad you have your priorities in order then, thank you.”

A comfortable silence falls between them as Buck moves around the kitchen and Eddie is struck, not for the first time since befriending Buck, at how comfortable his friend is inside of his home. That’s all Eddie could have ever wanted. Buck moves with such assurance taking a bowl down from the cupboard, pulling a spoon out of a drawer, knowing exactly where everything is without hesitation or having to ask. It warms his heart to see this, to know that Buck must feel comfortable here, that this could somehow be home.

“Thanks again for watching Chris for me. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it,” he says as Buck pops the now filled bowl into the microwave.

“Don’t mention it. I love hanging out with him and if I can help you in any way, I will. Always.”

Buck holds his gaze and for a moment, Eddie thinks he’ll say more. There’s something in his expression that looks as if he’s trying to communicate something wordlessly but far too soon, the moment passes and shortly after the microwave beeping breaks the silence between them. Buck smiles softly before turning away but Eddie keeps his eyes trained on his back, getting lost in his thoughts.

Maybe this is all in his head or perhaps an unhealthy amount of wishful thinking is at play but lately something has felt different between them, as if there’s something going unspoken.

Buck gets a tray and puts the bowl on top of it, carefully picking it up from the countertop.

“I can bring it to him,” Eddie says, gesturing to take the tray. “You can get out of here, if you want. You should enjoy what’s left of your day off.”

Buck rolls his eyes as he side steps and laughs. “That’s exactly what I’m doing now. Didn’t you hear? It’s Charlie Brown time. No way in hell am I missing him or that tree.”

Eddie smiles softly and shakes his head. He opens his mouth to say something but falls short on words. Buck seems to understand regardless as he smiles back and nods.

“I know,” he says simply. Eddie wants so desperately to ask what exactly it is that Buck knows, what he feels but he lets the matter go for now.

This right here is more than enough, he reasons. To have Buck look at him and comprehend even a fraction of his gratitude.

~*~*~

Eddie knows he worries too much but watching Buck throughout their busy morning and early afternoon with back to back calls, he can’t help but to feel a little troubled over Buck’s slower pace and quieter nature. Usually he could be counted on to be the most energized and talkative during calls but today he’s so much more subdued and it feels like a real cause for concern.

“You okay?” Eddie asks, searching Buck’s face as they wash their hands in the bathroom to prep for lunch.

“Yeah, I just need some food in me and I’ll be good to go.”

Buck smiles reassuringly but Eddie isn’t convinced. Nonetheless he follows Buck up to the loft where the rest of the crew is already gathered around the table. Eddie takes a seat beside Hen who sits across from Chimney, the two already engaged in conversation.

This leaves Eddie the coveted spot of sitting opposite Buck.

Buck settles in at the table beside Chimney, placing a hand against his throat as he clears it before he reaches to the center of the table to start fixing his plate. Eddie watches him curiously as he’s done all day, noting the way Buck seems to be moving a bit slower than usual, the man’s eyes trained in focus on the simple task of putting food on his plate.

Eddie wonders if he’s reading too much into Buck’s body language but given how well he knows his friend, he feels safe in his assumption that Buck is off today because he’s sick and putting forth his best efforts to disguise this fact. Out in the field it was easy to attribute Buck’s pace to the amount of work the team had to put into their calls but now, with everyone finally able to unwind and catch their breath, Buck still looks put out.

“Buck, you’re really hot,” Chimney says as Buck’s arm grazes his. Eddie purses his lips, his suspicion confirmed easily.

Buck flashes a smile and a wink. “Tell me something I don’t know. But I don’t think Maddie would take it well to know you’re hitting on her brother.”

Chim smacks his hand against his forehead and shakes his head.

“You’re no match for your sister, I can tell you that right now, but that’s not what I meant. Seriously, don’t you feel warm?”

Buck shakes his head. “No. It’s actually kind of cold in here, isn’t it?”

Hen pushes back from the table across from him, putting a hand over her mouth and nose.

“Nope, you’ve got to go. Cap, this bug is making the rounds quick. I swear half of Denny’s class is out with it.”

Bobby rises from his seat and walks over to Buck, placing a hand on his forehead. Buck looks like a grumpy child as his bottom lip pokes out slightly.

“Jeez, Buck. You’re like a furnace. I’m afraid I have to send you home.”

“But, Cap!” Buck tries to protest but Bobby shakes his head and holds up a hand to stop any more objections.

“That’s an order. And here are some more for you: drink lots of fluids, get in bed, and stay there. Be sure to get a ton of rest until this fever breaks. I know you want to stay on and help but you’re going to sideline the whole team if we don’t do this. Sorry, Buck.”

Buck sighs defeatedly and pushes back in his seat, rising to his feet. The crew murmurs their get well soon wishes to Buck as he heads toward the stairs and Eddie’s heart sinks to the pit of his stomach knowing how and why Buck is sick in the first place. He rises from his seat, quickly wiping at his mouth with a napkin before following him to the locker room.

Eddie stays quiet at the door as Buck gets his locker open and takes out his bag.

“So much for Buckleys don’t get sick, huh?” Buck says with a sigh, sitting down on the bench.

Eddie steps further into the room and sits beside him, putting a hand on his shoulder and giving it a light squeeze. He’s surprised when Buck’s hand comes to rest over his. Buck’s hand is warm and Eddie relishes in his touch but too soon, the feeling is gone; Buck quickly lets go and clears his throat, shifting his attention to his bag. Eddie’s hand falls limply into his lap.

“This one’s on me. I’ll stop by after work and check on you, okay?” he ventures.

“You don’t have to. I’ll be alright.”

“Maybe so but I’d feel a hell of a lot better seeing that for myself. I can drop you home now, if you want. I’m sure Bobby would let me run off for a bit.”

Buck smiles softly and shakes his head. “You’re a good friend, Eddie, but I can manage the trip home. I promise I’ll follow Dr. Nash’s orders to the letter. I’ll be back on my feet in no time, just you wait and see.”

~*~*~

It’s been two days and Buck’s fever has been making its presence known; it’s Chris’ symptoms all over again but Eddie is ready for it, already having placed a call to his grandmother for even more of her miracle soup. Eddie’s been anxious at work, keeping his phone within reach at all times just waiting to get replies from Buck when he checks in. Some messages are more coherent than others but overall it seems as if Buck is hanging in there as much as can be expected.

Eddie’s certain that what his friend needs now is his grandmother’s home-cooking to really send Buck’s ailment packing. It’s to her house he heads straight to after his shift, his thoughts resting heavily on Buck’s recovery.

“Abuela?” Eddie calls out as he locks back the front door of her home.

“In here!”

Eddie follows her voice to the kitchen where he finds his grandmother ladling her soup into Tupperware, the remnants of vegetables and spices on the counter.

He greets her with a kiss on each cheek, taking a set back so she can continue filling the container she’s halfway done with.

“Thanks for doing this...again,” he muses. “One day I swear I’ll learn how to make this stuff.”

She gives him a doubtful look but smiles. “I don’t mind making it for you and your boys.”

Eddie eyes her for a moment, taking note of the implication of her wording. Unsure of how or even if he should call attention to it, Eddie switches gears a bit.

“I’m sure Buck is going to appreciate it. This soup was practically magic for Chris. Buck is chomping at the bit to get back to the station. This is just the thing to get him there again soon.”

His grandmother sets the ladle down and secures the lid on the container, double checking that it’s properly sealed.

“And I’m sure you’re eager for him to get back, too.”

Eddie is brought up short by this, his brows furrowing in thought. Isabel Diaz is as formidable a woman as ever and is always far too good at reading things that weren’t spoken with Eddie. In a case like this, it only makes him feel on edge rather than comforted.

“What are you getting at?”

Isabel shrugs her shoulders but despite how nonchalant the gesture is, Eddie knows there must be more to her thoughts than she’s letting on just then.

“Nothing. Nothing at all. Buck is your best friend, no? I would think it’d make sense that you’d want your partner back.”

Eddie can feel heat rising in his face and quickly turns to the pantry, opening the door to it and taking a tote bag off one of the shelves, taking advantage of the brief moment of reprieve to pull himself together.

Eddie returns to her side and begins packing away the various containers. His grandmother is nothing if not efficient and thorough. These batches will be enough to get Buck through the week.

Eddie stays quiet while he works but just as he’s putting away the last container, she places a hand on his arm, stilling him.

He turns his head slightly to look at her, not quite meeting her eye. She takes it as the invitation it is to say whatever is on her mind.

“He’s lucky to have a friend like you,” she says softly, as if in thought.

“I’m the lucky one here, believe me. Buck’s always a huge help. At work, around the house, with Chris. This is the least I could do.”

It’s only then that Eddie looks at his grandmother fully and the knowing smile on her face is so comforting that Eddie feels the tension in his body melt away.

“People like that are hard to find in life. Be sure to hold on the good ones for however long you can.”

~*~*~

Visits to Buck’s after work have become the norm all week and with each trip, Eddie feels more assured that Buck will be better in no time. Today’s check in brings on a sense of déjà vu. In Buck’s living room now is a replica of the fort he and Chris constructed at Eddie’s place a week and a half prior.

“What’s your obsession with forts anyway?” he asks as he climbs inside, surrounded by plush pillows and blankets.

“Maddie used to make them for me all the time when I was little,” Buck says. “Building one with Chris has me kinda nostalgic, I guess.”

Eddie smiles to himself at the mental image of Buck as a kid. It isn’t too hard to picture what he must have looked like back then as he looks at him now, a blanket draped over his head and shoulders sitting cross-legged in front of the laptop, a movie already playing.

“What are you watching?” Eddie asks, settling in.

“Love Actually.”

Eddie laughs and shakes his head. “I didn’t take you for a romcom lover but I guess that somehow makes sense now that I think about it.”

“What’s not to love about them? The build up, the will-they-won’t-they but you know they totally will, the big sweeping declaration at the end? That’s what everyone roots for. Who doesn’t like seeing people in love live happily ever after? It’s the dream,” Buck concludes.

Eddie doesn’t argue the point. How could he possibly when that’s all he’s been hoping to have himself?

“That’s really your dream?” he asks tentatively.

Buck shrugs. “I definitely wouldn’t say no if it were to happen. But in order for all of that, someone would actually have to fall head over heels for me,” he laughs wryly.

“You make it sound like such an impossibility. Like you’re somehow difficult to love.”

Buck’s head tilts to the side a bit. “You don’t think that I am?”

It’s such a loaded question, a dangerous one really but still, the words fall effortlessly from Eddie’s lips as he replies.

“I would think that falling for you is one of the easiest things a person could do.”

Eddie realizes this conversation is veering off course and Buck probably isn’t thinking very clearly given the state of things. For all Eddie knows, Buck is hopped up on cold medicine and doesn’t realize he’s asking leading questions. Eddie falls silent then, laying back and staring up the blanket overhead as the movie continues to play on screen. The seconds stretch tauntingly and Eddie knows he’s said too much, gone too far over the line they’ve been treating as a tightrope.

He hears the tap of the keyboard and the movie pauses. Eddie keeps his eyes trained above him, hoping they can avoid delving deeper into this. But he’s kicked open the gate, ushered in this line of conversation he’s been terrified to have.

“Eddie, I—,” Buck starts but Eddie isn’t so sure he wants, or is even ready, to hear what Buck has to say in response.

“You should get some sleep.”

“But I want to talk to you. I missed you today. I always miss you when you’re away.”

Eddie freezes, unsure of if this an open statement Buck would be making if he wasn’t sick or possibly feeling awkward given Eddie’s last comment but he’d be lying to himself if he said it isn’t something that makes his chest warm right in the center.

“I’m here now and I’m not going anywhere all night,” he assures.

“All night? What about Chris?”

“He’s probably on his way to a sugar coma at my grandmother’s right about now. She’s baking tonight and Chris, of course, volunteered to help. I know he’s just in for the leftover frosting and taste testing.”

This seems to be a good enough distraction. Buck laughs softly and grows quiet, pressing the laptop again and Eddie is certain he’s never been more grateful to hear a bunch of British people in conversation with each other. He opts to just listen to rather than watch the movie; his focus is completely shot.

After a few minutes, Buck sighs and burrows in against Eddie’s side. Instinctively Eddie wraps an arm around his friend. Before he can undo it or reprimand himself for getting too familiar with Buck, the man buries his face against the side of Eddie’s neck.

He’s all too aware of each breath Buck takes, his skin tickling with every exhale. There’s nothing casual or platonic about this and Eddie’s heart aches so painfully in his chest that it takes every ounce of willpower he has to keep breathing. But still, before he can allow himself to truly accept what Buck getting this close to him means, he needs to hear it from the man himself.

“Buck?”

“You didn’t give me a chance to say anything before so I figured I’d show you where my head and heart are instead.”

Eddie sits up slowly, Buck moving with him. Eddie takes in his expression and sees a real clarity in Buck’s eyes that leaves no room for uncertainty that he’s serious. Eddie has spent so long feeling terrified of being presented with this moment but he takes comfort in realizing this isn’t one-sided like he’s feared.

“Is this the part with the big sweeping declaration?” he jokes lamely to work out his nerves.

“I sure hope so. That tends to always be the best part.”

“You’re a lot better at this than me,” he says, rubbing his palm against the front of his jeans.

“To be fair, I watch a lot of romantic comedies in my downtime.”

Eddie can’t help but to laugh at this, grateful for the levity Buck brings to this moment. He cups the man’s cheek and strokes his face lightly with his thumb as he stares into his eyes.

“I’ve never been too good with this sort of stuff but you make me want to figure out a way how to be. Maybe in time I’ll be able to get the words out but, if nothing else, just know that I feel a lot for you, Buck. With you, I feel everything.”

Eddie leans forward and kisses Buck’s forehead, his eyes drifting closed as he lingers for a moment. Buck sighs contentedly, one hand settling on Eddie’s knee. Eddie pulls away then, resting his forehead against Buck’s, his fingers carding gently through his hair at the back of his head. Buck bumps his nose softly to Eddie’s who smiles at the move.

“Crap, sorry,” Buck says, pulling away. “What if you get sick next?”

“I survived Chris’ fever. I think I’ll be fine with yours too. If not, then I’ll just have to commission Abuela to make more soup,” he laughs. “Speaking of which, I should get some for you. Or tea or—”

“No,” Buck interjects, holding on to his wrist gently, keeping him in place. “Please, just...stay here for a little while longer with me?”

Eddie looks at him, takes in that soft pleading look and nods. “Whatever you want.”

Buck smiles at this and lays down on his side. Eddie doesn’t hesitate in spooning him, his arm securing snugly across Buck’s hip. His face burrows in the crook of the man’s neck, chin propped against his shoulder.

“Now will you get some sleep?” he asks quietly.

Buck laughs, light and carefree. “I don’t see how I can be expected to now after all of this,” he replies just as quietly, playing with Eddie’s fingers.

“This feels like Christmas morning as a kid. All that excitement, wondering what’s in store. No,” he continues, shaking his head. “ I couldn’t possibly sleep now. I don’t want to miss a second of what comes next.”

[rosy-wooyoung]

[12:31]

🎄 Day 11 of the Christmas project🎄

pairing : san x fem!reader a/n: ngl i’m quite happy with this one. maybe bc it’s kinda personal? idk

You had just arrived at the cottage you inherited from your grandparents when they passed away, and, after driving for so long, you were happy to finally cut the engine. Months had passed since you last visited this small house filled with beautiful memories, and you had this strange feeling of happiness mixed with nostalgia overrunning in your body. The cottage was a small wooden house at the edge of the forest next to a lake, now frozen, the ground and the naked and lonely looking branches of the trees surrounding it covered in snow. You parked your car in the driveway and slightly shook your best friend's shoulder to wake him from his slumber. After a few minutes of constantly shaking him, San finally stirred up, softly rubbing his eyes as he looked around him.

"Are we already here?" he mumbled and you bitterly chuckled, unbuckling your seat belt and opened the door. "What do you mean already? You've been sleeping since we stopped at the gas station. It's been two hours dude," You poked his ribs before stepping out. San shook his head and got out of the car as well a few seconds later, letting out a sigh before helping you clear the trunk filled with things to get comfortable enough for the long weekend you had planned to stay together. 

The end of the year was coming, so that meant a lot of things to do at work: closing cases, checking details before sending files to your boss, preparing some others for the new year, it was everything but calm when you entered your workspace each morning. Fortunately, you had worked quite hard during the week, so today before lunch, San and you took your leave of work and hurried to your car, getting ready for a few hours of driving to get to this beautiful place where you had just arrived.

"Gosh, I've missed this place so badly," you said as you looked around you, eyes roaming as you observed the trees and your surroundings. You started getting a bit emotional as you recalled the hazy yet wonderful memories you had collected while growing up until it was time for them to leave.  

You remembered spending some of your Summer holidays here with your siblings when your parents grew "tired" of the three of you. They always claimed to need a break from being parents for at least a week, and so did you from them. When you were at your grandparents' house, more fun was allowed than when you were at home. It was an exciting feeling, and you were always looking forward to coming and visiting them at every opportunity you had. You never truly minded because you loved your grandparents and spending time with them. But for your younger siblings, it was a whole other story: they were constantly yelling about missing mom and dad, while you were just loving being there, catching up with your granddad

You had your little secrets with him, things that you hid from your family and your siblings. For example, you and your grandfather would secretly take two easels, always feeling that rush of adrenaline before escaping from the yells of your siblings to find a good spot to start painting for a major part of the day, hidden in the mountains hovering above the cottage. Each time, you came back from your getaway with a brand new piece of art, and a memory to cherish for the years to come. You entered the cottage, and a wave of nostalgia crashed onto you, a sense of comfort wrapping its arms around your shoulders. In the dark, you could still distinguish some of the pieces of art your granddad did when you were together. You opened the shutters and drew out the curtains your grandmother had sewed by herself, making the natural sunlight warm up the place. You then went behind the house and opened the electricity and water conducts while San took care of putting all the things your truck you carry inside the small house.

"It's a gorgeous little place that you hid from me," he teased, and you gently smiled, elbowing him in the ribs as you kept on putting everything in the right place. "It's my sweet escape," you replied as your best friend rested for a few seconds in the middle of the entrance, hands on his hips as he took in the decoration of the place.

When you had some rough times in your life - which happened more often as your grandparents fell sick one after the other -, you came to this little house in secret to unwind and spend some time alone, crying or just chilling. It was a bit like your secret garden, the spot that you had indeed kept hidden from everyone. Even your parents didn't know that you frequently visited here and spend some time in nature. That's why it wasn't as dusty and dirty as one can imagine an abandoned house to look like. Yes, it was a bit straggly, but to your defence, you haven't come to this place in weeks.

As the day went by, it was finally the afternoon, and it had started snowing as soon as you finished setting in the cottage house. You were quite tired from driving for a few hours, only being used to run a few errands for maximum 20 minutes, so you just wanted to chill and maybe take a nap on the burgundy, corduroy couch. San, on the other hand, since had slept a major part of the journey there, was just a human dynamo. Looking around, all smiley and excited as he watched the snow falling from the sky.

"Do you wanna do something outside? We could make a snowman, have a snowball fight or go for a walk?" he suggested as he let himself fall next to you on the couch, tickling your side with his left hand as the other remained against his chest. You stifled a giggle and squirmed, trying to escape from his touch. He stopped for a while, his eyes lingering on you as you were getting your breath back. "And what about going sledging? I just saw that there's a hill on the other side of the lake, we can go there," your best friend offered, but you shook your head with a pout. "San, I'm too tired for all of this," you whispered, and his eyes widened, taken aback that you declined his offer, again, "and where did you even find a sledge?" you added, not even knowing that your grandparents owned one. "There was two in the small storage unit, but don't try to change the subject. Why don't you want to go sledging?" he said while sitting up, laying a hand on your knee, shaking it a bit. "It's the best thing you could do when we have a type of weather like this!" he exclaimed while pointing outside, making you sigh and as you looked out the window. Yes, it was still snowing, and it looked quite consistent enough to sledge on it, but you could see some patches of blue sky appearing here and there, telling you that the good weather wasn't as far as you thought it was.

"Come on, Y/N, just for me," he said as he watched you stifling a yawn, happy that he managed to catch sight of a small nod in your actions. "Really? Let's go then!" he enthusiastically got up, not even waiting for you to run into the bedroom to get dressed. "The things I'd do for him," you whispered to yourself as you tiredly got up from the couch, making your way up the small stairs as well. Once you had slipped on your fleece-lined pants and warm coats, you made your way out the door, San trotting to the small storage unit behind the house to get the sledges. Those were made out of old wood, a thin rope attached to the tip of it. They looked quite old and dusty, but they would do the trick.

"So Y/N, since you're the expert of the region," San teased as he looked over, only to have you staring back at him with a fake bored look, "how can we reach this side of the lake?" he said as he pointed the side opposite the cottage, and you smiled. That is where you used to go painting with your grandfather. "Come on, follow me," you said as you confidently started walking, the memories colliding in your brain as you trusted your guts to get to this side of the lake. In the course of your walk, with San by your side, you told him some of your memories while pointing at different things.

"You see that tree over there?" you gestured to the naked weeping willow a bit further into the stroll, San nodding as his eyes followed your finger, "when it was getting either too hot or too noisy because of my siblings during Summer, I'd take a book and spend the entire afternoon reading underneath that tree," you explained with a soft smile on your face, remembering the great souvenirs as the leaves crunched under your moon boots as you stopped. "And my grandma had a whistle, and she would blow four times when dinner was ready, and I needed to come back," you told your friend, who had a sincere smile on his face. "This is adorable, it sounds like a Studio Ghibli plot," he said while taking your hand, making you walk slightly faster to pass the tree. San knew you well. He knew that if you spent too much time in front of this willow, you'd start getting emotional and probably cry, and that was the last thing he wanted to see.

You silently thanked him with a faint smile as you understood his sudden change of behaviour and you cleared your throat, keeping on telling him happier souvenirs as you finally arrived where San wanted to go. "I can't imagine how beautiful it must look here in Summer," he mumbled as he stared at the cottage on the other side of the lake. "It's even more incredible in fall," you said with a smile, "I came here mid-October and you're just surrounded by yellow and orange trees, you can really feel the fall vibes," you giggled with your friend, letting go of his hand, feeling suddenly nervous. You hadn't even noticed that San had kept your hand in his the entire time, and you were even hotter when you realised that he didn't even look bothered or shy of it.

You took a few pictures of each other going down the sledge, laughing and pushing each other around as the other took an unflattering photo of the other. The powder snow eased your falls every time you pushed the other too hard, sometimes shrieking as you could feel some snow slipping under your clothes and reach your skin. At some point, you were too tired to get up, so you stayed well muffled in your clothes, looking at the sky clearing above your heads. San was also in the snow, ignoring the freezing sensation of water against his neck and the goosebumps travelling his entire body. Instead of staring at the sky as you did, he seized the fact that you were too busy getting lost in your thoughts to stare at you. He loved seeing his best friend at peace like you currently were, it looked like all of your worries had vanished as soon as you pulled up by the house, the stressed Y/N getting replaced by the one that San imagined was the Y/N of your childhood.

The young man shifted in the snow, close enough for his hand to grab yours. As you felt pressure on your glove, you turned your head to the side, looking at him. He was already looking at you with a fond smile decorating his lips, and you raised your eyebrows, silently asking him why he was staring at you like that.

"I wish for this moment to never end," he spoke softly, the density of the snow under you two muffling his words, only for you to hear. "Me neither," you uttered, and San squeezed your hand as an answer, shooting you a wink before looking at the sky like you did just moments ago. He felt your gaze on him, and he started rolling towards you, miscalculating the number of rolls he had to do to come near you, resulting him almost crushing you as he was about to land on his back. You clutched your abdomen, anticipating his weight landing on you, but he swiftly moved around to land on his stomach, his mouth arriving millimetres away from yours.

None of you recoiled, getting lost in the other's eyes. Your breath had quickened up, something going noticed by San. He gulped but kept staring at you, your breaths forming one trail of steam above your heads, unhurriedly vanishing in the atmosphere. San pulled his thoughts and doubts to the side for an instant, his mouth colliding with yours in the gentlest way possible. Despite the dryness of his lips, the kiss released millions of butterflies in your stomach, sending warmth straight to your face. With your mittens slightly covered in snow, you cupped his face, and he groaned into the kiss, the cold against his face attempting to bring him back to reality.

But it wasn't enough to make you two stop kissing each other. You had both been secretly waiting for this for too long, and you didn't want to end the kiss right now. Making the most of it was the key point of the situation, and you let your lips linger on San's as if it was the last time before pulling away. The man gave you mere seconds to catch your breath before pulling you in another kiss, your hearts beating furiously against each other as your tongues danced together, head spinning and getting mushy due to all the emotions you were experiencing.

[lookingforhobi]

♡ Wallflower  ♡

Pairing: Hoseok x Reader

au/genre/warning: Fluff; dancer Hoseok; Sunshine

Word Count: 3,776

You’re the type of person who prefers silence, feels awkward in a tiny hint of spotlight, enjoys time for yourself, being in your own bubble and keeping small circle of trusted friends,

He is loud, enjoys the attention, friends with almost everyone!

Then your world turned upside down when you find yourself sharing the light with the one you’ve warned yourself to stay away from.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You always hated when he jokes around and makes the whole class squirm when he starts singing, rapping or dancing. You hate that he makes you smile with the way he laugh- slapping whoever is beside him or basically throwing himself everywhere. Hate that he sometimes disturbs you with annoying jokes, and most of all..  you hate how he can stop you from breathing and functioning with just a glance or more so when he says your name.

Okay, he is good-looking. And yes, talented. And yes, despite his boisterous laughter and loud personality, he is also a smart-ass. He aces exams, professors love him, and he’s really quite serious with his studies. He’s almost-perfect. Almost...because he annoys you and you know that means trouble.

So you choose to stay away from him, never acquainted yourself to him or dare get his attention. You prefer glancing from afar and being just a wallflower. You’re accustomed to being in your own bubble, minding your own business and staying away from the popular ones. Besides, you already got a plate full of responsibilities- keeping up with school, volunteering, and your job to at least help you balance your life. You’re surviving and thriving with the way you modelled your life.

But fate laughed and played on you when the yearly talent-show of the whole Uni started. You love dancing, always been your getaway from all the stress of life but never dared to join dance clubs and the like. The only time you can showcase your dancing skills is when you are forced to, like school requirements or activities. And this time, life put the greatest test on you.

“Okay, settled then! Hoseok and Y/N will lead the class for this year’s event.” Said Namjoon, the class President, as you enter the classroom from your job. You were almost out of breath from running just to get in class on time.

“Sorry, what?” you almost shouted. “The class decided, you’ll work with Hoseok while the other officers will prepare for other stuff needed. We have seen your performance during the dance show last week for our PE class and we have decided you have the talent. It’s time to finally share it, yeah? We need you to get past this semester, Y/N. Consider this as a charity for the whole class. Please?” You looked at him... His innocent smile and dimples popping out. You need to act cool and just go on with it. “I guess I don’t have a choice? If Hoseok’s okay with it then sure." It feels new to you stepping up, but maybe it is about time to make a change. Besides, you needed a break from studying and working. But then, you reminded yourself to step away from the limelight as soon as this is all over. This is just a one time thing but you’re literally anxious. You decided to shake it away. He’s out of your league anyway so it will all be good. You’re good putting up a wall.

Rehearsals are scheduled everyday after school hours, sometimes even on weekends. So this means you have to endure a month of preparation with Hoseok. It was okay at first, it’s purely dancing and putting your ideas together as a team. Hoseok leads us most of the time as he is one heck of a perfectionist when it comes to his craft. Never miss a count or else…

“Annoying!” you unconsciously blurted under your breath. “Sorry, what was that, Y/N?” he asked with his eyebrows raising. “N-Nothing. Just go on with the rehearsal. You’re good.” you said not even looking at him. You are literally shaking because him raising his eyebrows means you’re in great trouble. “Hey, this is OUR responsibility. I need you here. Please focus, Y/N!” He points at your phone, signalling to put it down. He is one perfectionist, and clearly a strict mentor! Most of the squad shivers when it’s time for business. But never forgets to be the Sunshine that he is during rest periods. He have different personas, which draws your attention to him even more. But you chose to stay in the shadow, as it is where you are comfortable…away from sunshine. You sighed and put down your phone. “Okay, from the top.” You almost shouted with annoyance.

“Okay, that’s a wrap. Tomorrow’s our free-time since you all did well today. Be careful of the rain! And inform me or Y/N if you reached your houses safely. Night, team. You all are amazing!” Hoseok says with full of enthusiasm despite dancing for hours!

“urgh! Fuck it!” you cursed while trying to contact another Uber rider. You’ve been trying to book a cab since the last break but to no avail.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” Hoseok asked as he packs his stuff. All the squad are gone and now you’re here with alone with your worse nightmare.

“Uber have been cancelling on me, that’s why I am so annoyed the whole time. Sorry for it, I will try not to affect my performance next time." you said with a sigh.

“Okay, just this time. Your mood shows in your dance. Come on, I’ll drive you home. I don’t want you getting sick,". Hoseok said casually.

“No, no. It’s fine. I’m good" you insisted. “Y/N, it’s night time. It’s raining. You’re my partner and my responsibility.” He looked at you and you literally gasp for air. You need to practice putting a shield up around this guy. He’s melting every inch of you with just one look. You hated it!

You managed to nod despite trying to control your breathing as he moved closer. “We need to run to my car though. I parked it there" Hoseok lead the way out of the dance studio. The rain was pouring hard, and your clothes literally hugged the shape of your body as you run towards his car. “Jump in!” he shouted as he opens the door for you. “Just our luck! We might stay here for a while. I can’t see a thing!” Hoseok exclaimed. Zero visibility means a high chance of road accidents, and you don’t want that.

“Do you have extra clothes? You can change. I promise, I’ll try not to look.” He said with a smirk.

“Urgh. I used all my extra clothes. Thanks to your nonstop dancing and glaring Mr. Jung Hoseok.” you glared with annoyance in your voice.

He laughed and pointed at the back seat “I have clean shirt and towel here.”

He leaned towards the back seat and accidentally touched your shoulder. You tremble with his touch. It sends a lot of emotions and damn butterflies everywhere. Again, you hated it!

“Are you sure? Don’t dare to look or ISTG it’ll be your last day, Hoseok" you warned. He laugh and winked, annoying you a little more. You try to cover yourself with the towel but failed. “Let me" He said almost whispering. You can feel your heart beat so fast, and your body begging for air.

He holds both ends of towel and closed his eyes “I’m not gonna look. You got to trust me. So go ahead.” He said.

He looks so perfect upclose. His lips slightly pursed. His dimples showing. His perfect lashes. His nose you just wanna pinch. He looks so calm and ethereal. “Done?” he asked, bringing you back to your consciousness.

“N-not yet.” you immediately removed your wet clothes and put on his clothes. You scolded your self as you try to keep your breathing under control. “Okay, done. Thank you.” you said as you catch your breath.

“Wow, my shirt goods on you" Hoseok compliments, looking at you from head to toe. “I’ll give it back if that’s what you’re thinking” you said shyly. “No keep it, I like it better on you" he smiled. And for the first time, you found yourself smiling back, taking in the complement from him.

“I think we’re good to go. Do you wanna grab dinner first?” he asked. You shake your head. As much as you want to spend time outside your house, your body is just too tired and cold.

When you reached your house, the rain is already stopping. “Do you wanna go inside? It’s the least thing I could do for your....kindness" you asked, genuinely thanking him. “Sure. You have dinner? I’m starving!” he said without hesitation. “I’ll cook. But you’re not gonna tell anyone!” you replied, as you roll your eyes. You’re not the type of girl who would put on great effort for food, as long as it is edible it’s okay for you. Besides, you’re used to feeding just yourself. But this time, you out-done yourself.

“Hmmm. This is delicious! I didn’t know you’re this good.” He said. “Oh Hoseok, there are more things I am good at" you blurted without thinking. He smirk, and his gaze turned dark. “L-like... like....” you try to look for things but he laughed aloud. “Let me explore that side of you, Y/N. You really caught my attention since the beginning, you know" he said without breaking eye-contact. “What? How? I never wanted to be in the spotlight. I prefer being a wallflower. So how can you say that?" you said almost whispering. Urgh this Hoseok effect is taking it’s toll on you.

“You shine everywhere you go, Y/N. It’s hard not to notice you" he whispered.

He moved closer and you find yourself leaning towards him, too.

“woaaaah Hoseok! Why are you here?” Blurted your annoying little brother Jungkook. Hoseok bit his lips and slowly smirk at you while turning to Jungkook. “Hey there. I dropped Y/N here.”

Jungkook looked at you with his wide, annoying smirk. “We just finished rehearsals. So... you wanna eat? I cooked dinner" you try to act chill but your voice is failing you.

“You what??? You never cooked for me! What's...” Jungkook was about to say more but you glared at him. You don’t want Hoseok to have a hint, or whatever. He immediately grabbed a plate and start eating while talking to Hoseok about gym and music. But you know deep inside your annoying brother, he will never let this to rest.

You walked Hoseok out of the house after dinner. The rain finally stopped and it was getting late.

“Thank you for driving me home" you said shyly. “Thank you for the wonderful dinner" he said.

You stood there for a couple of minutes, not wanting this to end. Until he gently pulled you towards him...

“Come here" he whispered. You stood frozen and he enveloped you into a tight hug. You felt secured, safe, comfortable inside his arms. “H-Hoseok..” you whispered shakily. “s-sorry Y/N. It’s...sorry. I have to go then" he retreats. You smiled and bit your lips still trying to gain composure. “I’ll call you...when I get home. “ he said and left.

 He called after few minutes for a quick goodnight. You never talked about the hug or whatever happened that night. You leave it at that, you’re fine. It’s confusing for you but you prefer not to say a word. Better to stay as a wallpaper than share the spotlight and gain attention. You’ve been a wallflower since then, and it’s best for you to stay like that…. Hopefully until graduation.

-------

“Y/N! What time did you finish rehearsal last Friday?” asked Lia, my bff. “Not late. Why?” you answered while subtly looking around the classroom. “Heard you went home late?” teased Ryujin. You stared at them wide-eyed and they laughed. “No, Hoseok drove me home. Uber’s been a pain in the ass so I have no choice.” They both have this silly wide smile. You never told anyone what happened but clearly, your brother can’t get a hold of his tongue when it comes to Ryujin.

“Y/N", someone whispered from behind. “Y/N! Babe!” Hoseok said loudly that the class stopped. “What the--?” you glared back at him. “What? You’re not answering so I had to say it louder.” He said jokingly. “You’re annoying. Stay away from me Jung Hoseok!” you shouted back. You put your earphones on to ignore him and the class mocking you both. He seems to enjoy this teasing, you don’t. You hate him for that. You hated the teasing and the fact that he’s very vocal. Seems like it is just a joke, everything’s a joke. He will never get serious. “This is why I prefer to stay away from you. You’re trouble” you said to yourself.

*text message*

9:01 am: Hey, it was just a joke.

9:01 am: Please...

9:02 am: Look, I did something for you...

9:03 am: Y/N!!!!

9:03 am: I'll shout again.

 You looked to his direction and he showed you a flower that he drew *insert Hobi's drawing *

You rolled your eyes and texted him back.

*text*

You: I’m a wallflower. I’m invisible. I prefer to stay that way. So please, whatever you’re planning to do, Hoseok, leave me out of it.

Hoseok: you’re not a wallflower. I see you. You shine.

You: stop it, Hoseok. Right now. Please.

 You put your phone inside your bag and tried to ignore Hoseok for the rest of the day. He keeps on bugging you still, but you never let your guard down. Besides, you can hear him from afar because of his loud voice and boisterous laughter which is so easy for you to spot and stay away from. His energy transcends beyond the school walls, and he’s making your shield tremble.

 During rehearsal, you can’t ignore him anymore. It’s going to be tough but you tried to keep it professional. But just as he said, your emotions can sometimes be shown in your performance. Even the whole squad knows you’re ignoring him.

“Okay. Great job. Tomorrow, same time. Same venue. And I expect everyone to give their best.” Hoseok ended the rehearsal as usual with a bossy, straight-forward attitude but with a sunshine smile.

“I’ll drive you home,” he whispered to your ears, sending signals in your body. You gasp when he moved closer and freeze when he gently touched your head. You were determined to turn him down earlier that day, but with simple touch you totally forgot that plan. You’ve been resisting, but he still won’t let go. He gave you food and water during the rehearsal break, he even gave you extra towel while you were mentoring one of the dancer. He keeps on reminding you to drink, asks for your opinion, and smiles once in a while in your direction. Whatever this is, you’re not sure. But you like the feeling of attention, it’s all new to you. You hated it, that’s for sure. But everything change when you let Hoseok pull you towards the light. Everyone notices you now, you’re getting compliments and people starts to notice the things you do and the things you excel at. It is new, and exciting, and overwhelming at the same time. Thanks to Hoseok who first noticed you, before you even notice yourself.

 You stayed that way during the whole preparation time. He drives you home after rehearsals, and sometimes he picks you up during weekends. He’d park his car and have lunch in one of his favourite spot few minutes away from the city. You never talked about labels, you just enjoy talking on the phone with him till you both fall asleep, you just want to enjoy a bit of attention he gives you during school hours. He respects your wish not to disturb you or do anything cheesy during class. You both settled with silence of each other’s company. You get used to him following you around the campus- annoyingly but still being subtle. His friends stopped teasing you both when they start noticing that things between you are getting serious. It’s not just about the dance, partnerships or the fun of it now. You don’t know, but he’s changing you.

 During class, he would sit far away from you. But during break time, he made sure to remind you to eat and drink. Sometimes he asks if he can sit down with your friends and couldn’t get his eyes off of you. It was uncomfortable at first, but then you found yourself looking to his direction when he’s not sited beside you. You even let him join your laboratory group and would help you manage to get through your fears of needles. You started to trust him and let him enter your bubble. Soon, you both were inseparable. Sharing sandwiches and even drinks.

“So tell me, what’s with you and Hoseok?” asks Lia. You shrugged your shoulder because that’s the truth. You do not know! You never talked about labels, who you are in his life, what’s the deal with all his sweetness and why are you letting him take the lead. “I just want to warn you, that thing-whatever you both have, is not good. You’re in for a heartbreak.” Ryujin voiced out her concern. “You need to ask him. People are starting to notice, you know. Even other class are asking and girl, get out. It’s big drama for those girls.” You sighed in response. They are right, girls have been very unsupportive with you.

 On the day of the event, you prepared yourself to ask the big question. You’re not the confrontation kind of person but you need to settle this once and for all. Besides, you promised yourself at the beginning that this is just a temporary thing. After this task, you’ll go back to your own bubble, away from light.

 “Wanna know my secret?” Hoseok asked before you go up the stage. “What?” you asked shakily. “I hate the spotlight, too" he said seriously. And for once you can sense his uneasiness. You unconsciously held his hand and smiled “You got this. Just think we’re still inside that dance studio. It’s just us.” you smiled. He pulled you into a tight hug and sighed, “What am I gonna do without you, babe?” he whispered and kissed your forehead which left you frozen for a moment.

“Can you celebrate after we get that trophy?” one of the squad teased and you immediately stepped back from each other. With shaky breaths and unstable heart beat, you went up the stage and dance your emotions away.

It was one tough performance. All groups are so great. But in the end, your squad won. It was one of the happiest moments but then reality sink in. It’s over. No more rehearsal flings and late night drives, what you have with Hoseok must come to an end, too. “Hey, you okay? We won but you seem off after the performance. Did I do something wrong?” he asked on your way to your house. You didn’t know how to answer so you just looked out the window and it seems like he can sense it too.

When you reached the house, Jungkook was nowhere. So no reason for him to stay longer. “Can I come inside? I think we need to talk" he said seriously. You just nodded without a single word, afraid of what’s coming. As you stepped closer inside, you can feel the impending end of what was the heart-stopping fling you’ve ever had.

“What's wrong, Y/N?” Hoseok asked wearily. “Hoseok, what are we?” you asked directly without looking at him. “We? Us?” he asked back, dumbfounded. You tightly closed your eyes trying not to cry in front of him. “We are perfectly happy with each other. We compliment each other. Aren’t we?” he asked, as he slowly lift your chin up. “Y-yes. But... are we...?” you shook my head and sighed. “I don’t know, Baby. All I know is I can’t stop thinking about you. I can’t focus if I can’t see you. I need you. I like you, Y/N. Isn’t it obvious?” he whispered. You can hear his sincerity,  you can feel it. “Okay.” you answered. “Don’t you feel the same way?” Hoseok asked. “I....I do. But I don’t want to assume things. I-" you didn’t finish talking. Hoseok put one finger over your lips to stop you. “oh Baby...” he whispered and touched his forehead into your.

He leaned closer and your heart starts pounding real hard. Your belly tightening, and your whole system shuts down. You closed my eyes and felt his lips kiss your shoulder and then he kissed your forehead. “Y/N. I---I want to kiss you real bad,” he whispered, asking for permission. You smiled and bit your lips.  It started with a simple peck. All of your worries and what-nots slowly fading away. This, you like this. You like the feeling of security and warmth he gives you. You love the fact that he sees you even if you can’t even see yourself. That you shine for him and so does he. You let go, finally. You let him take the lead. And you know, whatever happens next, he will never let you go. You can feel his tongue gliding over your lips asking for permission. His hands roam at your back, slowly caressing every inch. It was sweet, and hot.. and the kiss deepens. He pulled you closer... You anchored your hands on the back of his neck and begin fondling his hair. His hands glide to your waist, slightly pinching your sides. You gasp and let out a small moan. “Hmm. I like that sound" he whispered, and pinched you again gently. “H-Hoseok...” you moaned his name under your breath.

“Y/N, you’re making me want to do things!” he laughed with husky voice. You looked at him and bit your lips. He smirk, “don’t look at me like that. I don’t want to force you to do things that you don’t want to do, Y/N". He tried to get away but...

“What if I want to?” you bravely answered. You have enough teasing. Yes, you hated it. You want him. You want him and all his annoying traits!

“Oh baby" he whispered and went on kissing you. This time, deeper, harsher... Like thirsty individuals tasting wine for the first time. You drunk all the feeling and stopped fighting. You let go.

“Do you wanna go upstairs?” you smirked. “Oh anywhere with you, Baby" Hoseok answered.