#but a remorseful CS is not my CS

[boarwinds]

In your AU, does Lucy Gray have to be a mentor to the future generations of D12 tributes? If yes, how do people react to that? Cause I could easily see the accusations of favoritism/rigging that could generate if anyone from 12 ever started doing really good. How would that all work?

There’s actually a fic that dealt w this exact issue n i loved it SOOOOOO much, made me want to pull my intestines out of my belly button n swing. It’s v toxic not much fluff if at all lmao but check it out!

I still haven’t decided if LG should be a mentor bc like you said there could be accusations of favoritism but if that ever did happen I think it’s like an open secret that CS will kill anyone who slanders LG, if not to protect her as his wife but bc LG disrespect=CS disrespect, that’s HIS wife. On the other hand, her not being a mentor could also be seen as another form of favoritism bc she doesn’t have to deal w the trauma of “guiding” kids who were once in her place and are most likely going to end up dead days after meeting them. I think it could work if the mentorship program starts w the 11th victor, w the first 10 being except bc…. Reasons. Also the whereabouts of the first 10 victors are unknown right? minus LG ofc. Yeah i think ill go w that LMAO, LG won’t be a mentor not bc of favoritism, but bc the first 10 get to be exempt. Now as to how LG feels abt that, i think it would be so traumatizing for her to get involved, but also. It would eat her up not to help. I rly think the fic i linked dealt w it so much better than i ever could so yeee here’s the link again https://archiveofourown.org/works/51952198/chapters/131373604

[nocentis]

Sown Fresh to Bloom┆ X793

╳ ┆A beautiful dawn. Its fingers splayed over the horizon in brilliant golden streaks, flexing heavenward in decorous praise. Their warmth graced his face; cupped his cheeks with the airiness of a lover's caress and tilted his chin toward infinity. A gentle so overindulgent and undeserved.

Still, he felt the spread of his own fingers in time with the sun's stretch. A vigor reignited from skin to soul. He felt victory and defeat in equal measures. Love and life at last, free to take, and yet he'd never felt less qualified to seize either.

Familiar steps approached. He need not turn to know. She was the only one who might seek him out now, as the rest were well on their way. He watched them embark just before new light, smiling fond, waving kind, yet he could only see past as they walked toward future.

“When will you be leaving?”

Meredy chuffed, somewhere between a sigh and a laugh, like she wasn't expecting his ask. “Is that your way of telling me the guild’s disbanded?”

“No,” he answered honest, “Everyone is leaving. I just assumed...“

"Right. You assumed," she chastised, never shy. “Where will I go?” She mused, stabbing forth, “I have no village to return to. Few other friends, and none more important than you. I’ve got nowhere to be but by your side. Why would I leave now?”

“You've grown. Any legitimate guild would be lucky to have you. You don’t need me anymore.”

“Maybe I never did,” she posited simply.

“Maybe so,” he returned evenly.

Her hand curled around his shoulder, light enough that he could pull away and yet present enough for comfort. “You’re my family. What’s left of it, anyway.”

“Family?” He repeated, testing it on his own tongue. It was honey-tart. Sweet dressing to an open wound.

“Like an Uncle,” she clarified with a half-shrug. She smirked, nearly teasing, “A young one, of course. But you’re all I have left in terms of kin.”

So simple. So light. So free. Her voice was airy and unburdened despite how much she'd lost. In that way, he envied her. She made peace with her transgressions, made proper sense of them, and moved to become someone radiant and inspiring. Whatever was left of her hurt was buried; deeply personal and harshly constrained. Perhaps he wanted that for himself — to become a beacon for those harboring remorse or regret and to lead them to peace.

The horizon blurred into something grey and sallow. His own voice sounded foreign when he droned, “And that means you’ll stay?”

Meredy’s light-hearted demeanor dropped. She sighed, combed a hand through her bangs, and took a seat in the grass beside him. Rather than answer his, admittedly, redundant question, she issued one of her own. “Aren’t you happy for the Seis? They’ve finally been awarded their due freedom. They can do what they truly want now.”

“Of course I’m happy for them. Beyond happy. I’m elated,” he answered in truth. "I only wish it could've happened sooner."

“But there’s something else, too,” she gathered. “There’s always something else with you.”

“You’re right." His gaze dropped to his worrisome hands, diligently rubbing themselves raw. In comparison to the blownout blur, they almost looked too real. "It has nothing to do with the Seis though, I'm afraid."

“So, what is it?" She prodded, insistent. "What plagues you?”

“I’m not sure how to describe it," he admitted. "Guilt, perhaps."

“May I?” It was more of a suggestion than a question. Her finger flared a soft pink as she pointed between his wrist and her own. “Maybe I can give it a name. That ought to help. At least a little.” At his blatant hesitation, she coaxed, “Come on. You said it yourself. I’m grown. There’s nothing you could be feeling that I haven’t felt myself.”

“Alright,” he conceded, though he remained less than thrilled.

She closed her eyes, released a stalled breath, and their wrists came alight with shared rosy charms. Her impatience was a fading whisper, quickly replaced by a mix of curiosity and concentration, and then his own hesitation echoed back to him twofold.

“You don’t have to say anything," she coached, nothing but patience in her instruction, "Just... think.”

Just think. Right, then. He could do that, couldn't he? It was one of the things he did ceaselessly, second only to breathing.

Meredy's concern was latent, flowing into him unbidden. More dominant than that was concentration—no, determination. Her focus on sorting him out indirectly fueled his own internal redirection, gently nudging him back into his own head from whence he came.

It felt entirely too open, though he probably should have expected as much. He made her worry, and vulnerability was the unfortunate consequence. He shouldn't have been so presumptuous, assuming she would leave simply because the Seis were ready to move onto bigger and better. He knew better than that. She wasn't so fickle as to spring such a lofty switch on him without first discussing it at length.

His insecurity was eating at him again. What he deserved was hardly his reality. He knew that to be true, though on occasion, he allowed that thing in his chest to paint the scene a ghastly pallor; a delusion of death owed.

But true justice wouldn't award him death. It would have him live all of their lives in succession. It would have him live their pain, their futility, their trust and betrayal and their earth-shattering moment of clarity, an endless loop of agony for naught, and then—then it would spit him out at their feet and have him beg for their mercy.

His life should be in their hands, and yet, because of the strength he coveted under the influence of the damned, because of the strength he cultivated in his selfish desire to preserve the ones he so loves, he still held a power he wasn't so sure he'd earned. A power that kept him almost untouchable.

His own magic was a cruel irony. A reminder of the standard he could never embody so long as he breathed and evermore. For all the Heavens he'd drawn from, he was himself the false-prophet, undeserving of the stars' forgiveness. Undeserving of peace. Of light. Of love.

And yet it followed him still.

“This isn't guilt. It's shame,” Meredy chimed in.

“That’s… warranted.”

“To an extent." Her hand rose to her chest, idly rubbing circles just beneath her collarbone. Her face twisted in despair, and he could feel his own sorrow amplified and echoed back to him through their link. Meredy's voice wavered when she argued, “This is exorbitant. It should be debilitating.”

"Break the link," he suggested. Tears brimmed her eyes as her nails sunk into her shoulder, yet he could feel her reluctance to let go; to leave him alone with it. "Please, Meredy."

Despite her obvious hesitation, she honored his request, rubbing her wrist where they were only just connected. There was pity in her eyes, so much of it that it was sickening. Her words came out wet, strangled, like she was still choking back the tears he wasn't willing to shed, "Is that really how you feel all the time?"

"No," he attempted to ease her concern, but it was utterly unconvincing. "There are moments of joy, and pride, and hope."

"What about peace? Calm? Silence?"

He opened his mouth only to close it again.

"Why haven't you..." she stopped herself and started over like she already knew the answer to her initial question, "Do you think it's doing you any good, holding onto this?"

"I don't know how to live without it," he confessed. "It's my burden to carry. I cannot forget. I cannot separate myself from what I've done."

Her face pinched, somewhere between anger and upset. For the first time in a long while, she seemed disappointed in him. "You're not carrying it. You're letting it consume you."

"I don't want that."

"What do you want?" She bawked, voice riding the line between irritation and incredulity. "From life, from yourself, from anything?"

"I want to help others," he answered immediately, no rumination required. "I want to find others like me, like us, and lead them to light."

"How can you do that if you can't find it yourself?"

[stnkiconverse]

Creepypasta HCs no one asked for!!

Jeff The Killer

- I see him as Wasian and you can't tell me otherwise.

- Chinese mom and American dad (American cs he had that strap on him fr)

- VIRGIN!!!

- Stinky..like..SERIOUSLY STINKY.

- You actually cannot step into his room without gagging, It's blood in the most random places, stinky shoes, clothes strewn around everywhere, and I'm sure that if you were to dig through his closet you would find a dead animal or two (I wouldn't even put my hands near his room)

- He steps in lots of puddles and walks in the rain and doesn’t wash his shoes.

- I Imagine him around 5’10-6’1.

- Didn't bother to fully learn his moms native language and would only learn cuss words.

- Lashes out at everyone and everything.

- Talks shit abt everyone in their faces and has gotten into several fights because of it.

- Only gets along with Smile Dog and can tolerate Ben and Toby. Not so much Toby because he is easily irritable and will lash out at Toby for ticking even though it’s not his fault, he learns to control himself and remind himself that Toby can’t help it.

- Has ASPD, BPD, and Psychopathy.

- ASPD: He shows deceitfulness, impulsivity, irritability, aggression, lack of remorse and a propensity for violent behavior. BPD: He has intense emotional stability (leading him to be unable to be in long-term friendships and relationships), impulsive behavior, intense emotional swings, and unstable self-image. Psychopathy: Poor judgment, egocentricity, lack of remorse, or empathy, and manipulative behavior.

- Has to be kept away from Sully because Sully will jump him.

- I don’t believe he actually cut through his whole cheek.. maybe cut pretty deep but not all the way through. And let’s leave the mans eyelids alone, I’ll say he has no eyelashes (they were burnt off) but I’ll leave his eyelids alone, everyone needs sleep and if he had no eyelids he would be dead, would’ve died before Slender even found him..

- INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA (hes bi idc)

That’s all I have for Jeff right now!!

[veveisveryuncool]

so, i was wondering about that mirror AU. first off i wanna say, i really like the designs. but i did have a few questions.

So first off, for Magolor, you say he's basically blind but it looks like he has an eye in his mouth like the original soul version. Is that not an eye or am I just going crazy?

Secondly, You mentioned how Adeline is the most normal of them. So are all the characters basically insane and if so, how would you say they rank on the sanity scale?

And finally, and I just have to ask this being a fan of both these characters, but you mentioned that Magolor has someone to help guide him, being blind. Is there by any chance that this seeing-eye jester you mentioned happens to be Marx?

ohhh hi!! tysm for asking about this! i'm really glad people took an interest in those mirror world counterparts, it means a lot :]]

ok, to start, i'm gonna talk about adeleine and sanity :D (since the two magolor questions tie in with each other and bc i like talking about her)

here is the "sanity" scale! i put this in quotes because they are all a little bit insane in their own ways <3

adeleine is the "most normal" here, not because she is mentally sane, but because she basically lives the same life she had pre-DL3 (living alone in cloudy parks, surrounded by her living discarded WIPs, having various temper tantrums). obviously, she still plays a role in the mirror-world version of 64:CS, but she let the whole "shiver star oh my god. earth is dead. humans are gone and i'm the only one left" thing completely take over her psyche. she stays up in the clouds, desperately trying to remember life on earth, and maybe– just maybe, convince herself that she's not alone.

magolor is doing surprisingly okay here?? like, sure he barely managed to scrape his way out of purgatory, and now has the remains of his wrongdoings etched into his body, but he's taking it like a champ 👍👍 he denies what happened to him was his fault (even when it totally was), and because of it, his AD experience was ramped up to 11. he feels no remorse for his betrayal, and instead no longer fights kirby simply because he gave up trying. he's also got the whole..eye and crown thing going on. so.

elfilin is next, with him basically being confined to the Pickle Jar. he's trapped in his own mind (forever wandering the isolated isles) and just kinda floats there, waiting for something to save him from an eternity of chaos. i put him above adeleine because of the situation that leads him there in the first place. since the initial splitting of elfilis/elfilin was a lot more messy, it means that they're stuck in a yin-yang scenario. instead of completely good, elfilin is mostly good, and that sliver of darkness increased his susceptibility to fecto forgo, drawing him to lab discovera. the beast pack captures him and tries to fuse him with forgo, but because of the discordance, it's taking a lot longer. the "good" part of elfilin hangs on, trapped in his dreams and slowly losing his grip, which is represented by his constant crying of the blood cell-like orbs from chaos elfilis' fight.

ribbon is. not doing so hot here. not only is she on the verge of breaking (mentally and physically), she has essentially isolated herself to complete an impossible mission. since the crystal was smashed into thousands upon thousands of pieces, she'll likely spend the rest of her life searching for each shard. she wallows in guilt and self-depreciation (even though it's not her fault!!), and is also fighting off dark matter possession at any given point. her will is strong, but how long can she last?

okay!! magolor time!!

magolor's seeing-eye jester is indeed marx! (though he will kill you if you call him that) while mirror-marx is even less of a good choice to befriend than normal marx, their friendship still upholds :]

while yeah, magolor does have a huge-ass eye in his mouth, it's not him that's doing the seeing. the visual information goes straight to the master crown, if this makes sense.

the master crown's power has dulled, now forming a symbiotic relationship with him. magolor provides the crown with a body to host, and the crown's magic allows him survive AD, basic perception (he's not gonna run into a tree anytime soon, but can't read or see faces), and a huge ego boost.

[naffeclipse]

Naff, just wow.

Immediately after I finished reading the CS chapter the tears came all at once, streaming down my face and leaving wet streaks down both of my cheeks. It is hard to make me cry like that. I’m floored, just completely stunned.

I’m soooo happy you gave us a chapter like this, giving the characters and the reader a safe space to digest and get some questions answered. It was also much needed after the action filled chapters before it and it’s a nice resting stop before the horrors waiting before us.

Naff, you write so beautifully, I’m looking back at the lines of text I saved to keep for this comment and I’m gonna cry again from just reading them! (Also sorry,, this is gonna be a long one,,,)

They ate and came back to your trailer, where all of your weapons reside. Holy water, silver knives, and bolts, the Latin incantations to exercise beings just like them.

Just, I’m crying at this. To me it holds so much emotional weight. This story is so close to my heart you don’t even know AAAAAAAA

The repeating “Eat.”, “Please. Eat.” and finally “Ask, then eat.” has me on the floor weeping and I don’t know exactly why. Just the ‘ask’ before the ‘eat’ feels so calm and like they’ve fully opened up. Ready to answer any question.

“Yes,” Moon answers softly. “We ate their hearts.”

You jerk in your shock, almost flinging the egg and sausage bit off of your utensil and to the floor.

“You ate his heart?”

Moon becomes completely still. He stares blankly at you then at your chest.

I swear they can’t keep doing this! But they must! But please phrase it differently boys! XD

The nature of the demonic cryptid before you tumbles through your brain and into your heart—a monster that protects children. An instinct to reject it as a fairy tale touches your nerves. It’s too good to be true, that’s too romantic to believe a being of teeth and claws would seek to protect vulnerable children.

Again, your writing!! And AAAAA IT IS TOO ROMANTIC TO BE TRUE BUT IT’S!!!!!

I’m so happy mothman came up again! And slkfdlfkfsahvjdf that whole bit was so needed oh man!! Perfect way to break the tension! “You killed it,” “It’s not your boyfriend.” FDKLKFSAJKADFG

I love that Y/N isn’t afraid of Eclipse, they’re afraid of Eclipse hurting others. This is why they love Y/N, their heart is filled with only compassion and an undying will to protect others. That scene by the gully, my brows still hurt from how much I was furrowing and straining them, I was at the edge of tears the whole way through. (I’m crying rn reading it again)

“Life means much to you, we understand—”

“No, you don’t! You don’t know the value of life at all,” you jab your finger at him, hitting the yellow button on his chassis, “If you did, you wouldn’t kill an innocent person!”

*WAILING*

“Heart, we have acted too long upon fear.” He holds your gaze, their voices low and rumbling with pangs of remorse and pleas. “We are still learning, but we want to show you that we are better for it.”

*LOUD SOBBING*

And the vow!! aaAAAA!!!!

Deep in the darkness of your sleep, your fist closes around their true hand, and squeezes.

They hum low, rumbling you into ease with a purr of promise.

They are yours.

I’m fucking CRYING!!!!!

The back rubs have me absolutely MELTING! that’s how touch starved I am at this point

Oh and the hug KILLED ME!!! OH MY GOD THEY NEEDED THAT. I THINK I NEEDED IT MORE THO. AAAAAAAAAAAAA Thank you for that :’>

The slow slooooow build of trust, acceptance and some fragments of happiness coming back was a wonder to read! And the still lurking distrust in the form of the salt shaker is tugging at my heartstrings so hard I think I’m gonna cry again..

Absolutely AMAZING chapter as always!!!

I told you before but please, pleeeeease don’t worry about taking your time with your writing. Waiting one month between chapters is nothing. I’d wait an eternity if necessary❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Meep, I'm gonna melt into a puddle, please!!! I'm thrilled that you enjoyed this chapter and I'm seeping into the floor knowing you like it so much! I also love that you shared your favorite paragraphs/quotes because alsdjflasdfj it's always a warm-fuzzing feeling when I hear what people were affected by!

Thankfully I won't make you wait a full month again, but I do appreciate it ♥ ♥ ♥

Ah, thank you so much, babe! ♥

[enchantedxhearts]

All this CS gifsets on my dash and rewatch of some episodes not only tempt me to add OG!Hook (a divergent version of him, of course, fy Eddie and Adam) but also got me thinking... thinking that it's not even Hook himself I hate so much, it's the way writers treated him,

like "we declare him to all of sudden be a good guy so everyone should think of him as a good guy without any redeeming steps on his part (I'm not saying he didn't do good things after S2, I'm saying he didn't actually try to redeem himself, like, you know, at least try to apologize to people like Belle and Archie for all the shitty things he'd done before he fell for Emma and joined the hero squad)",

like "we're gonna half-ass him a tragic backstory in a poor attempt to show that he is actually a good guy who became a villain because bad things happened to him" (mind you, I'm not saying anything against his backstory, just that it looked like it was very hastily and poorly thrown together),

like "we are gonna make up some new bad things he did way in the past so we can show that he is remorseful about them but we are going to totally ignore all the bad things viewers saw him do back in S2"

So I am actually seriously considering adding Hook here and giving him the proper redemption arc he (or at least Colin, who is such a fantastic actor it's a shame they wasted him a lot on a pretty one-dimensional and poorly-thought through character when it could have been a really great character, and Emma, in the universe where he is her True Love, do) deserves.

[coryosbaby]

ok i’m just gonna say you can completely ignore this i just needed somewhere to get my thoughts out. also idk if you’ve actually seen tbosas or just write for the characters rn but if you haven’t seen it then don’t read this lol. so first of all im now gonna go through and read ALL of the coryo stuff i didn’t before bc i hadn’t seen the movie and i felt weird but i’ve seen it now so yeah. but wowwww. the movie was actually so amazing idk how you felt abt it but im still in shock and it ended like half an hour ago, it was incredible. the way coryo’s character and moral judgement shifts throughout and its shown by his hair too which i think is amazing. i could go onnnn abt the easter eggs and links to the other movies but i wont, instead ill just say my jaw DROPPED when he killed high bottom at the end and with RAT POISONING??? im losing my mind rn but all my friends are asleep and i just needed somewhere to get it out 😭😭

NO BC THIS IS SO REAL . I’m ranting about this, spoilers ahead for the movie & book btw 💔

I hadn’t read the book when I watched tbosas but I saw a few snippets and saw how Coryo was thinking the whole time, but when I was watching it I was like ??? Ain’t no way they must’ve changed his character but NO bro like he’s a whole manipulator 😭 and the way the end of the movie shifts into his pov and shows his true paranoia/pov. So we’ll never rly know what Lucy Gray actually thought (though she prob did wanna get tf outta there n I don’t blame her)

and I js wanna say rn. I see a lot of Sejanus in Johanna. Like katniss too, obviously, but Johanna is definitely another form of his rage.

Like don’t even get me STARTED on Sejanus, there was sm going on in his and Coryo’s friendship or wtv tf that was. Like in the books Coryo is INSANELY jealous of Sejanus ?? But the way they were friends since they were KIDS bro 😭😭 and coryo js thought they’d send him home bc he’s capital. like I can’t. It’s literally so sad. Tbh, in the movies it seems like Coryo sees more of Sejanus in the whole rebellion in the later hunger games than Lucy. Cs Lucy was never a rebel rly? And he only rly cried & felt remorse during Sejanus’ death?? Like it’s HIM that really haunts him, on top of Lucy’s songs. But I think she enrages him while Sej makes him feel guilty

Also the way they make fun of Sejanus for calling his mother “ma” and it’s the last thing he says :(( and he realizes that Coryo betrayed him right before that .

THE WAY THAT CORYO LITERALLY TAKES OVER SEJANUS’ PLACE IN HIS FAMILY. LIKE MOVES IN W HIS FAMILY, CALLS HIS MOTHER “MA”. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK ILL NEVER GET OVER THAT

OMFG. And the way Coryo’s dad died in the woods by a rebel. And then he kills Lucy in the woods 😨😨 the way that once u think about it he def knew what he was doing the whole time, like he probably planned 90% of that out beside a little bit of stuff.

And how Dean highbottom, esp in the books, didn’t even WANT the hunger games to be a thing. Like you think ur gonna hate him bc he’s the creator of the hunger games before watching but dr Gaul is actually the worst one 😭

Also the way Coryo’s roses change ? Like he uses red ones when he’s young, but later when he’s old he uses white ones— and to me this seems like symbolism for him “cleansing” himself of Lucy gray (while also keeping roses bc they reminded him of his mother).

[csgossip]

I dont feel bad at all for her and ik a lot about her from a mutual. What are we supposed to say, 'Boo hoo the poor loser who scams children is a big wide loser in real life too :((' ? It's no surprise to anyone

Guess what most people on this planet dont have great lives and thats why many of us play lil games to feel better. What otter does to feel better is actively make her shitshow of a life everyone elses problem and feels NO remorse for it cause taking advantage of people and making up shit is the only way she can feel like shes above anyone

At least some of the problematic people on cs have the excuse of being legit children but otter is a whole ass adult gone to community college who was barely even able to graduate high school (painfully obvious every time she opens her mouth) but still old enough to know better. She could be struck by a tactical satellite and it would be 100% deserved nothing of value would be lost. No pity for someone who firmly goes "I'm going to make my shitty life other peoples problem and bring other them down to!". She's a miserable bitch thru and thru and she will never amount to more cause she doesn't want to. She'll stay unloved and rot like she deserves one day

.

[umbrellasfuture]

Character Info Sheet

name: Wilhelmina Ophelia Wesker

name meaning:

Wihelmina: will, desire and helmet, protection

Ophelia: helper

Wesker: wise

alias(es)/nicknames: Billie

ethnicity: German and Korean

one picture you like best of your chara: billie taking selfies just seems soooo ooc, and i love this for that.

three h/cs you've never told anyone:

She genuinely feels no remorse for shooting Jade. The way she sees it, Jade abandoned her when they were still teens, and the night she bit Simon was the night she became an only child.

Despite how easily she cuts off others and doesn't let her emotions show, she's desperate to feel close to someone.

When she'd first started working for Umbrella, she hadn't intended to turn Evelyn into her puppet. She only did so when she learned how Evelyn had used Joy on Diana to control her and keep her from leaving her, and decided to use it against Evelyn before she could do the same to her. That's when the corruption in Billie began.

three things your character likes doing in their free time:

Reading

Skateboarding

Watching old sci-fi and horror films

eight people your character likes / loves:

Soldier Boy - lettherebemonsters

Gunpowder - lettherebemonsters

(My) Lucy - songbirdsandsugar

Carlos - ubcs

Billie doesn't let people get close, so..... *shrugs*

two things your character regrets:

Telling her dad that she hopes he dies.

There's not a second thing.

two phobias your character has:

big dogs

letting people get close to her

tagged by: snagged off the dash

[frogtanii]

oh fuck, fuck, shit. this was not how things were supposed to go down.

what was supposed to happen, according to the magnificent imagination library of sugawara koushi (don’t judge him, he made the name when he was like 5), was that he’d get a little drunk after spa night and share his story with his newfound friends. he was hoping for a maybe a few hugs, no words of pity and, once again if he was lucky, a seat beside you while you watched some sappy lighthearted comedy to get his mind off of the whole situation.

what suga got instead, however, was an increasingly pissed you, ready to pounce on meiko the second you got. he couldn’t pretend that your reaction wasn’t incredibly endearing, especially since he’d never seen you get this angry in all the time he’s known you, but koushi couldn’t help but worry that after this... everyone would know.

so he raced after you down the hall, until you burst into meiko’s room with the rest of the group hot on your heels.

meiko looked up from rummaging through her bags, startled, while iwaizumi immediately jumped to her defense. you were not deterred, peering around him with such fire in your eyes that not even meiko was immune.

sugawara was actually rather impressed with the stoicism you held even when you stood face to face with iwaizumi’s biceps.

god, those arms.

“meiko, you fucking bitch,” you muttered, lowly and under your breath. the gasp meiko let out was absolutely scandalized as iwaizumi pressed himself closer to you.

“hey, don’t you dare talk to her that way,” iwa expressed, instantly drawing your attention. suga didn’t even pretend to hide the gasp that escaped his throat as he watched your eyes turn even more steely and cold.

he’d hate to be on the receiving end of your empty gaze.

“get the fuck out of my way,” your smaller hand found its way to the center of iwaizumi’s broad chest and pushed.

faintly, over the sound of blood rushing in his ears, koushi could hear atsumu yell something along the lines of get em angel! but his eyes were utterly stuck on you fiery form.

your own eyes remained focused on meiko who was now cowering behind iwaizumi’s back but for the first time ever she actually looked... scared?

koushi felt something alight in stomach (rage? hurt?) as he watched the woman who’d unapologetically taken something he’d never ever get back with no remorse, look fucking scared.

of course she would have the audacity to be afraid in the eyes of pain and not her horribly absent morality.

fucking hell. she was so going to get what was coming for her.

koushi let a manic grin grow on his face as he watched you shove iwaizumi harder to finally, finally, get your hands on the woman who’d destroyed his life.

when hajime tried to get back between you and meiko, bokuto, atsumu, and sakusa stepped up to keep him away. suga suddenly felt two solid presences appear at his sides, a quick glance out of the corners of his eyes informing him it was kuroo and kenma beside him.

“do you wanna leave?” kuroo leant down to whisper, his deep voice vibrating at the shell of suga’s ear. koushi absentmindedly shook his head no, brown orbs watching as you whispered something in meiko’s ear, her eyes immediately going wide in shock.

god, he wished he was right there next to you, listening to every piece of bullshit meiko spat out of her mouth and from the looks of it, it was a ton.

kuroo and kenma began to speak over suga but he was too occupied with you — you looked so powerful and in control as you stood over meiko, saying something else that he couldn’t hear but whatever it was, it must’ve upset meiko because her face twisted from afraid to fucking pissed.

he couldn’t do anything but watch in slow motion as meiko’s hand flew up and slapped you square across the face.

the room fell silent as everyone looked on in utter shock. (un)surprisingly, you weren’t startled at all — you actually looked pleased as you touched your cheek gently as though you were surprised it even hurt.

koushi’s theory was then proved correctly as your voice rang out through the silent room. “wow. that actually kind of stung.” kenma snorted next to him at your nonchalance as another wave of admiration overtook him.

suga knew he must have been looking pretty enamored by you but it was only amplified as the whole house watched your hand fly down into meiko’s face, slapping her at least twice as hard.

now, kenma straight up cackled as you and meiko fell into an all out fight where you clearly had the upper hand.

behind your little defense squad, iwaizumi attempted to fight past the wall of strong men to get to meiko, but there was no way he could get past bokuto’s arms that were big enough to rival his.

unfortunately for suga (and kenma who was having the time of his life), all the noise from the thrashing and screaming (coming mostly from meiko) had attracted quite the crowd. daichi and osamu immediately rushed to yank you off of meiko who was now lying on the ground yelling and sobbing.

she was an absolute wreck, her mascara smeared across her face, extensions pulled every which way and a bright red handprint plastered on her left cheek as a black eye seemed to be coming in on the same side.

you, on the other hand, whilst being dragged away by osamu and daichi, looked absolutely stunning.

your hair was a mess, blood was running from your nose down your to your chin, and you had a feral grin spread across your face but even still, to suga, you’d never looked more beautiful.

at first, koushi thought it was because he had a minor blood kink (don’t ask) but after more thought, he discovered that it was more than likely due to the fact that you had physically fought for him.

you’d decided, on some merits unknown to him, that he was worth getting bitchslapped for and that meant more to him than you could ever know.

“hey,” kenma’s soft voice shook him out of his thoughts as he gently led him out of the room. “they’re putting yn in her room so we’re gonna go there, ok?”

koushi thinks that kenma could’ve led him straight into a pit of lava if that’s where you were. he just desperately needed to see you, to thank you for what you’d done for him.

suga needed to prove to you that your bloody nose wasn’t in vain — that he was somehow worth fighting for.

℗ poker face

a boy worth fighting for

series masterlist

(●’◡’●)ﾉ

an - ahaha get the mulan reference?? wow m so funny ALOS this chapter sucks ass cs i’m so bad at writing fighting (&& it’s 1a m so tired) lmao pls just take this w a grain of salt ;-; don’t forget to feed me <3

taglist - if your name is in bold, i cannot tag you

@boosyboo9206 • @geektastic84 • @elianetsantana • @trashy-simp • @infinitebells • @6mattsun9 • @suhkusa • @sazunari • @kotarosbabygirl • @fucktheworlddude • @insomniacwreck • @calumsfringe • @saltylettuce • @chai-blu • @al3x1ss • @hawksyoongi • @syndellwins • @jooleuuh • @amberalisa • @kissungjae • @liberhoe • @tetsurocore • @animeoverdosee • @duhsies • @saikishairclip • @afire24 • @premiyagi • @kit-kat428 • @doctorspencereid • @daphnxy • @kyomihann • @maer-333 • @sinoflust19 • @peteunderoos • @peachiikichu • @iidanotlida • @yongboxerrr • @kac-chowsballs • @tanakaslastbraincell • @memorableminds • @risjime • @starry-magicshop • @sugavwara • @smuttyanimeslut • @kiwibirbs-library • @haijkk • @airybnb • @babierin • @iwaisa • @decaffinatedtealover • @notameera • @kawaii-angelanne • @rintarovibes • @urlocalsimp

the rest of the tags will be in the replies!!

[jenotapes]

the coincidence | lee jeno

from the moment their eyes met as they departed, his woe heart immediately finds you in front of his eyes.

pairing | lee jeno x fem!reader genre | high school!au, angst, fate!au

warnings | profanity, a cliffhanger LOL, mentions of vomit cs people cant handle alcohol

word count | 1.8k

notes | happy birthday to lee jeno <3 enjoy this really old draft from last year (sorry if my writing is a little ass here LMFAO) that i fixed a little, i was also too lazy to make a banner LMFAO

From the moment his hands fell from your touch, he looked at you with remorse. “I’m sorry it had to be this way Y/N.” his beautiful, bleary eyes caught your ambivalent state, and he couldn’t bear to look at you after. “It’s fine.” Your words seemed lilted, it had never felt so awkward between the two of you. Both their fiddled hands unable to find a comfortable position, his weary eyes looking everywhere but at the girl standing in front of him. 

“I guess this is goodbye then.” A smile had never seemed so painful to look at. Jeno maybe expected a small hug to bid farewell, but you walked away the moment he finally looked back at you.

He wanted to reach for your hand but decided not to. He wanted to seem like the bigger one in this situation, ‘I’m better without you’ he felt. Although he regretted it the moment his hands fell, and your figure was already lost from his sight. He wasn’t ready to let you go.

-

Jeno leaned his back against the metal lockers, resting his hands deep in his pockets. “What do you say?” Minji probed, clasping her hands together as she waited for his response, giddying around with the obvious intention of asking the boy out. “I’m not interested, sorry.” He runs his hand through his hair, declining her offer, because simply— he just isn’t interested. “I could always just-!” 

“Enough’s enough.” Jaemin calls from behind, hanging an arm around Jeno’s shoulder. “But-” before she could finish the two were already gone from her sight, walking away before she could start her endless blabbering on how she’s such a potential girlfriend(and that he should totally go out to her party). “She’s so clingy, doesn't she understand personal space? She keeps pestering you to go out to the party.” Jaemin sighs, rubbing his neck. “I won’t go anyway.” “Is this because of Y/N?” “What?” “I mean totally speaking, even if I wasn’t here to say no— you wouldn’t go anyways. She dislikes parties, doesn’t she? So you’ve gotten used to never going anymore.” He cocks a brow as to why. Jeno Lee: the partygoer jock who was now, a party phobe. Jeno scoffs in response, “She hates parties.”

“Right.” Jeno’s gaze lowered in memory of you. He recalled the one time before he finally stopped being a reveler; how you would pester him not to bring you along, but you’d end up going for the sake of him; driving him home while he’s dead drunk, and assisting him nearby albeit how much you hated the awful reek of sweat and alcohol, unnecessary yelling and the moshed pit of people partying as if their life depended on it. Not to mention the teetotallers who love to vomit. Those were the times, it’s been two years now.

“Not over her?” Jaemin assumes, the boy’s eyes widening in response. He wasn’t over you at all in fact, the day he implied you were no longer of any importance to him, his heart pierced deeper than it should have. He wasn’t always good with his words, and his body language never seemed so strong either. Seeing you walk away so easily with a pained smile left him confused. Then he never saw you again.

He had been staring blankly for a while, Jaemin getting him out of his trance with the snap of a finger. “Yeah, you definitely aren’t.” He chuckles, Jeno shaking his head as this rather stoic expression painted his face. The school bell starts tolling throughout the school, and Jaemin is about to bid him an early goodbye with the slight fear of not having his homework done. “I got psychics, see you after.” He smiles, the two doing a little handshake before they parted ways. 

As faint chatters of students slowly faded, and the many crowds slowly went into their respective classes, Jeno realized he was alone.

Deadly silent, it was as if the time had stopped and he wasn’t able to hear a thing. He slowly closes the door of his locker, his ears picking up the sound of small footsteps coming nearby. 

The minute he shut it, his eyes couldn’t help but focus on a figure; the back of the person that struck such awful deja vu. It was all too familiar for him to forget, and for some reason, he felt the feeling of pure agony from the moment you appeared. Not even one feature is seen yet chills are running down his spine like the speed of light. Quiet breaths left his lips, staring as you started picking up your books from the somewhat cold ground. He knows who you are, but it's just that he wouldn't want to know at first glance.

No one wasn’t able to give him that odd pour of regret as much as you did.

“Y/N..?”

Jeno blinks, a little anxious. Maybe he shouldn’t have called your name-- gulping in fear that you would never look back, again. 

Miracles always tend to happen in moments like these. The time did stop as the two had met ways yet again, It was as if it was only the two in their red world. With the final put, they had looked back.

Jeno’s eyes locked with yours. He didn’t dare look away, nor did he want to care about classes or whatnot. You yourself wanted to do the same, reject the idea of looking away and savor the moment, but you couldn’t help it. What was he doing here? As a matter of fact, what were the two of you doing there? You gulp, instants between the both of you falling in like a waterfall, unable to process who you just saw. Taking all of your books, you stood up-- ready to run away. Just as you always did.

The latter’s eyes widened to your sudden reaction, instinctively running to grab your hand as he ran before you could leave. He couldn’t bear to let you go once again.

“Wait.” He abruptly says, hands gripped tight to your wrists. “Please don’t leave just yet.” He breathed, certain he had just seen the love of his life again. After two years, in fact, it felt too surreal for him, all the months he’d been longing to see you again.

He realizes the other side of the building seemed fairly different from his, walls bright white with blue lockers. That cream plank flooring, they were from somewhere different. He was sure of it, he wasn’t blind. It was clear. Fate brought them back together, didn’t it?

You take a deep breath, slowly looking back to meet his doe eyes once again.

Your eyes immediately teared up. 

“Jeno..?” With eyebrows raised, they fell into each other’s touch once again. After two years of longing, they were finally able to see each other face to face. Jeno seemed ecstatic, his name-- coming out of your mouth. Your sweet, gentle tone he loved so much with his entire heart. His expression curved, nodding his head in excitement with a smile so wholehearted. “Yes, yes-! That’s me, that’s ..me.” His voice seemed to croak, both in happy tears and disbelief. You couldn’t help but smile at his response with a soft chuckle. “We meet again?” You chirped, acting as if you hadn’t just disappeared from each other’s sight two years ago. 

The boy nods again, unable to put out a proper response. His eyes glisten as he bites the bottom of his lip, hissing at the slight pain of his rough action. “I really wanna kiss you right now. Is..is that weird I..” Samoyed boy rambled as if it was his first time ever dating his whole life. “After you told me off? No thanks..” You scoffed, the latter’s expression glowering at your response. You look down the same way his head lowered, gently bringing both of your hands to cup his cold cheeks.

“I’m just kidding, silly,” You chuckled, both your thumbs slightly brushing his fringe as he melted into your touch, resting his cheeks ever so comfortably. His eyes looked up to yours once again. Whenever both of your eyes met, they’d felt as if they had fallen in love at first glance. Time finally stopped for the two, following the small silence came to a kiss.

Jeno’s lips leaned in with yours, a magical touch he hadn’t felt in forever. Two years seemed like demise, and the both of you leaned into each other’s touch during this short moment. It was everything the two  could gather, to just see each other one last time. The movement of his lips softened, Jeno’s hands stroking the gentle strands of your hair. Visions blurred and lips stuck together like a magnet and in a slight moment, they finally parted their lips. What felt like forever was what they needed to lean into each other. It was all the time they needed.

“I missed you, and your lips.” He chuckles, gently caressing their cheek as he looks at you with hearty eyes. “I miss every part of you.” You smile, wrapping their arms around his bare neck. The two of you shared laughter, Jeno nuzzling his nose on the crook of your neck. “Fuck, I missed you so bad.” He chokes up, tears forming in his eyes from having been able to see his lifeline again.

“It’s as if everything bad we’ve been through was forgotten right?” 

Your gentle tone. God how much he loved every inch of you. The girl who smells like lavender and loves the winter season albeit never even having experienced it much. Jeno nods, lowering his hands to their waist to hold. “It’s crazy. You don’t know how much you complete me.”

“From the way your eyes glisten, your scent to your vanilla lips, your gentle tone, your loving personality. I miss you, I just..” He slowly closed his eyes.

“I never meant to say you were never important to me, I was just in a tough situation, and I.. I wasn’t able to properly tell you what I wanted to say. I never expected you to walk away like that, as if you were ..expecting it? Did I ever treat you wrong? I’m sorry if I have baby, I just.. wanted to get everything over with and engulf you in my arms, straight away. I just..” His eyes are shut, his touch felt like feathers.

“My mom wanted me to cut contact with you.” He breathes out, his hands trembling. “I didn’t want to. I felt so angry I just let it all out that Friday..” “From the looks of it, it seemed you knew, didn’t you? I’m sure you did.” He chuckles, smiling.

“From the bottom of my heart, I love you with every inch of my being. I never meant for it to happen, I was selfish to let you go just like that. You mean so much to me.. D-don’t you know?” His voice seemed hoarse, bits of tears falling down his cheeks. 

It was silent.

“Y/N..?”

As a matter of fact, the moment Jeno opened his eyes-- you were no longer in sight. A small white feather slowly falling to the ground as his eyes widened. 

And so, the bell rang.

do not translate or copy © jenotapes 2022.

[it9chi]

Hiii I don’t know if your taking request and if your not it’s fine you can totally ignore this lol :P but if you are can you do the trend of the pretty best friends with maybe Akaashi, Bokuto, and kuroo 🙈 by the way I loved the way you write the characters

how they blind react to the audio “i ain’t never seen two pretty best friends, always one of them gotta be ugly” from tiktok + find the first part here

kuroo:

man doing this to kuroo would be so funny

cs we know he lowkey prideful

so this would “”potentially”” hurt his ego

at least when it comes to you

cs this bitch hates losing to you no matter what

like he’s not like this to kenma usually

and u tell him its bc kenma is his favorite bestie

then he’s all like: noo ahaha who said i like kenma more than u? ahah who sed that cut the cameras

then proceeds to baby and pamper kenma right in front u

smh kuroo we were friends first 

ANYWAY SO

just like oikawa, he likes inviting himself to your tiktoks, selfies, etc u know the drill

so roping him in your tiktok would be easy breezy

you set up ur camera and pretend you were getting ready to dance to that fishing pole reel it in tiktok

(also prior to this u told him abt wanting to do that tiktok w him)

and just like you predicted it, kuroo is now magically next to you smirking and shit at the camera

pulling a debby ryan yes king pop off

then the audio plays: “i aint never seen two pretty best friends. always one of them gotta be ugly”

KUROO NEVER LOOKED SO OFFENDED IN HIS LIFE

kuroo goes :O like you did something so scandalous in front of him

even if the camera didnt hear his voice, its still kinda obvious that he said “chibi chan~”

now its ur turn to gasp

mf smirks at your reaction and picks you up like a sack of potatoes and throws you over his shoulder

all of that caught in camera

and right when he was gonna throw you on the bed the camera stops recording

y’all blow up overnight ;)))

the comments: “they gotta be more than friends!!”

“sis i’ll be his best friend if u don’t want to be his bestie anymore”

kodzuken: so y’all a thing now or-

bonus: what actually happened is kuroo tickled u and showed no mercy nor remorse </33

bokuto:

ahh yes bokuto

bokuto beam besties !!!!!

ft. a very very tired akaashi

you pull this shit to mess with the team

perks being the other fukurodani manager

(this is why konoha lowkey hates u but its okay queen u lowkey hate him too (as a joke)) 

ANYWAYS

so managers have to settle things right before practice starts right

after helping yukie and kaori, y’all had extra time

this is when u call bokuto in 

“bokuto lets film a tiktok real quick!” you call out to ur bestie who was with akaashi and konoha

bokuto immediately dips on them and runs to you

“what are we dancing to today?”

we know this bitch can dance lets not lie to ourselves rn

u tell him u want to do that hit the quan remix trend on tiktok and he agrees

mf even knows the step already so uh anywayz

this is the part where brokuto gets bamboozled

you click record and bokuto starts rubbing his hands together like hes about to throw that ass back and start dancing religiously

til the audio plays

“i aint never seen two pretty best friends always one of them gotta be ugly”

so that played throughout the gym

konoha and akaashi stop talking and turned their attention to you and bokuto

the realization settles in and bokuto frowns

and everyone in the gym thinks his emo mode is about to work up and they’re all about to run to him 

before bokuto lets out a big cackle

“you’re so funny sometimes, y/n” bokuto wipes a tear from his eyes from laughing so much  

bokuto suddenly goes quiet til mf starts chasing you around the gym

“BOKUTO IM SORRY” you screeched as you ran for your life

“nOPE! IF I CATCH YOU IT MEANS YOURE THE UGLY BEST FRIEND” he retorts, catching up on you

in the end the video caught u guys running around the gym

konoha took this as a chance to repost your video with the caption “what a dumbass” 

akaashi:

akaashi and this tiktok huh.....

do u know who u’re doing this to ??????

like akaashi???

akaashi keiji ?????????????????????????????????

this audio and akaashi just dont get along at all... like ... UGLY??? 

all in all im p sure this thing would backfire 

and im not even joking luv xoxo

ANYWAY SO

you do this at home bc ... u dont want to embarauz urself doing this at school cs what if someone saw u calling THE akaashi ugly 

so yeah u have this thing w akaashi where y’all just chill at ur respective homes for no reason at all

#bestietingz

and since akaashi is a genuinely nice guy and is a rlly rlly close friend of urs, he wont say no to ur vague requests <3

“keiji let’s do a tiktok together” you shake his arm as the mf reads a fucking book

“hmm okay” he hums, putting the book down

not forgetting to bookmark the page ! bookmark king ! knows his shit ok im getting sidetracked

you set ur phone down and angle it right

akaashi just does the bread face :] respecting ur viewers!

even if ur viewers r just the fukorodani team at best... maybe even some nekoma students bUT THATS NOT THE POINT HERE

ur trying so hard not to laugh and its so painfully obvious ur hiding something like akaashi is alr dreading cs he doesnt know what ur planning

so u press record and the audio rolls in

“i aint never seen two pretty best friends, always one of them gotta be ugly”

it turns to an awkward silence after that

cs akaashi didnt rlly know how to react

like he knows this shit is corny and just..... he cant even describe it oh god

and ur like looking at him for a reaction

hes just there like: :] ......

LIKE YOU TWO R ALREADY MAKING EYE CONTACT

AND UR LIKE COVERING UR MOUTH TRYING NOT TO LAUGH UR LIKE

“DO U GET IT??”

and akaashi is like: “yes i do :]” 

AND UR LIKE: THEN WHATS UP WITH THIS REACTION

then he’s all like: “nothing. i know you’re not ugly and u shouldn’t let that meme define who you are because you are beautiful”

like a mf poet making ur heart melt 

u put a closed caption thingie mabober before u post it cs u wanted to let ppl know who or how tf ur bestie acts and damn right hes right !!! ur not ugly neither is he !!!

the comments when u posted it are all asking for his contact information and the just like

“SIS I WANT HIM”

“WHATS HIS @??”

even bokuto commented like: THATS MY AKAASHI RIGHT THERE !!!!

and kuroo responds with: u cant win over him bro

and then bokuto replies again with: DUDE

[gxtrbazxt]

Head-Canon Post #001 - aka, headcanons from my post that’s blowing up on my main rp account and more -----

- Actually prefers J-Rock and Chill/Funky Electronic stuff over Rock/Punk Rock/etc, doesn’t mean he HATES rock and stuff, but it’s interesting to see him enjoy outside of the norm stuff. - Montz is the name his father called him while he was in his early days of learning the Bass Guitar. He’s still called this by older bandmates before he got brought in for Freddy’s Glamrock Band - Freddy and Chica’s real names are Fred and Kay, and were the closest to the old animatronic versions from the olden days of Fazbear Entertainment, that still exist to this day - Currently Roxanne and Montgomery are the only two not under nondiscloure agreements, and over the past 3 years in my canon, have been trying to hunt down answers of the company in secret. - Fred and Kay know the truth and aren’t able to say anything about it. - The Animatronics in the Robot Verse also exist in the Anthro verse, as replacements for the real deals, the old animatronics, the murders, Glitchtrap, etc.. all still exist in the Anthro verse. --- Robot Verse Exclusive H/Cs ---

- Montgomery did destroy Glamrock Bonnie, though unlike all current theories, Monty is deeply remorseful and regretful over his actions, he wasn’t in control of himself when it happened - Montgomery has a tick in his AI Programming Fazbear Entertainment put into him on purpose that makes him extremely angry / destructive, this tick is completely uncontrollable for the longest time. - After Bonnie’s destruction, they wiped most of Montgomery’s memories about Bonnie and their destruction. Truth is, Montgomery and Bonnie were having a friendly game of Golf when the Tick happened, Montgomery’s voice and actions were different, and the last thing Bonnie heard before being pushed into the pool was-- “ I CAN’T CONTROL WHAT IM DOING--IM SORRY.” - AI Parts and Services made it so behind the anger tick is all the guilt and trauma behind it, making Montgomery emotionally shut down, it’s a failsafe that gets rid of the tick just in case Monty finds out about it and tries to overcome it, which, he does eventually.

- Montgomery is the first of the 3 to get manipulated to track down Gregory, he’s incredibly weak-minded and has his anger against him. - Glitchtrap/Springtrap / Mega Pizza Plex burning down - is the canon ending on this blog, Montgomery escapes and tries to hurt Freddy and Gregory, and then the brainwash/control falls and he just, stops, looks around, and sees the Pizza Plex aflame. - Montgomery goes back inside and drags out Chica and Roxanne before firefighters arrive to the scene, and they all hide in the forest nearby until they leave. - All 3 have memories of being controlled, and Montgomery is taking it the worst, because all the memories of him destroying Bonnie are back.

- “Why didn’t you destroy me when you had the chance, little dude?” - Deeply regrets so much and goes silent for the longest time until the Pizza Plex is rebuilt, all four of them refuse to have their memories wiped.

[ouatsnark]

CS - Hate Debunked - Keep Reaching!

Because I just like debunking stupid things I see while scrolling through Once posts. Here's some more I've run across.

“Emma denied she was with Hook but never denied loving Neal”

Yeah she did deny she was in love with Neal. When she was on the beanstalk with Killian she denied ever being in love. You can say “well, she wasn’t about to open up to a stranger” and you’d be correct but you can’t say she “never denied it”. Cause she did. She tried to forget about Neal and the pain he obviously caused her. She was denying to herself that she ever loved him.

She also denied it to Neal’s face when she gave him his necklace back. Saying she wore it to remind herself never to trust again.

She also stood Neal up. She may not have been afraid to admit she loved Neal but she was afraid of letting him in again and was even hoping he was dead. If Emma’s love for Neal had never died then she’d have never wanted that nor ever needed that closure so he could never hurt her again. Did Emma love Neal? Yeah. He was the first man she fell in love with and is the father of her child. But that doesn’t mean he was anything more than a former lover or that she was still in love with him. That was pretty obvious when she stood him up and it was Killian’s attention she encouraged at the town line, not Neal’s.

I find it amusing that these Swanfire fans have to use Emma’s confusion about where she stands with Hook after a pretty hot make-out session as proof she “denied being with him”. She didn’t know what they were in 4x01 because she’d only just let her walls down and then she became worried about Regina going all evil queen if she saw them together. Her walls had gone back up by that point because as she says she was “afraid of losing him too”. Which brings me to the following claim:

“Emma loved Neal & wasn’t afraid to say it but could only tell Hook she loved him when they were in danger”

It’s like they missed the part where Neal was the reason Emma built her walls and the reason she couldn’t open herself up was due to Neal’s abandonment and betrayal. Neal caused that. Regina too. She was just opening herself up to Graham when Regina murdered him. To Emma, every time she opened her heart to someone she lost them. Not just romantically either. It happened to her in the foster care system. Emma was afraid to love and lose that love. It took her a while to overcome that.

She couldn’t admit out loud that she loved Killian because she was afraid of losing him. And that is very significant difference. However, once she was over that she did openly admit to everyone that she loved Killian. Killian was the one she couldn’t stand to lose and literally went to hell and back for.

And before anyone says “but she tells ghostNeal she’d have done the same for him!” Honestly? I don’t believe it. She wanted his help because she immediately goes from that to “please tell me how to save him” and then in true Neal fashion ghostNeal denies her her happiness. Also, Emma may have cried over Neal but it was Killian Jones she couldn’t live without. Emma hoped Neal was dead. Emma fought for Killian. Emma cried once over Neal but she didn’t mourn him. But Emma mourned Killian.

“Hook didn't believe Emma until he saw the ink from the pages on Liam's hand. Neal would have believed Emma the instant she said it without any proof.”

I spit my wine out when I read that.

Neal accused Emma of being jealous of his fiancé and mocked her super powers. He also questioned her abilities when she suggested that she pick up the watches. So please, the idea that Neal would “believe her without proof” is absurd.

From my point of view - and this is my opinion - How often did Killian Jones follow Emma’s lead? Many times. He followed her lead up the beanstalk, in Neverland, during the Ice Witch Hunt, during the hunt for Zelena and trusted her plans to get them all home when in the Underworld. I don’t look at this as Killian not believing Emma but Killian not believing in himself & the fact that he regarded his brother as a hero. Anyone would have a hard time believing the worse in their hero. It takes more than someone elses opinion to knock our heroes off the pedestals we put them on no matter who that someone is. He thought he knew his brother and Emma had just met the guy. Also, Killian was dealing with a lot of guilt and remorse at the time.

Killian also apologized to Emma. Neal didn’t until he decided he wanted her back after his fiancé was dead and it was convenient for him.

“Hook said “one of these days I’m going to stop following this woman” before following her into the time portal. Regina wouldn’t have hesitated”

I LOLed at this one. First off, Hook wasn’t hesitating. He was making a sarcastic remark before letting go and following Emma to uncertain ends. And secondly, Regina stood by when Emma disappeared into the hat. Snow jumped in without hesitation. Regina wouldn’t even, initially, face her sister so that they could get to Emma after Emma took on the darkness. Killian did though. He met the issue head on. Regina would hardly ever follow Emma’s lead. In fact, I can’t think of one time Regina did … Regina always thought her plans and ideas were better than Emma’s.

And before anyone says “But what about the Wish Realm! It was Regina that went not Killian!” Well, yeah, Killian couldn’t. He wasn’t in control of the genie. Regina was. She says as much to the EQ before she makes the wish. Which by the way … why didn’t Regina just wish Emma back? Was there a reason she didn’t? Other than to make the two most ridiculous Regina Fan Service Episodes to ever exist?

“Emma kissed Hook while Henry’s life was in danger and that makes her a bad mother”

Soooo what does it make Regina when she was banging a dying woman’s husband and ignoring calls from the people looking after the son she illegally adopted and abused for 10+ years? I’ll wait.

I don’t think Emma kissing Hook in that moment made her a bad mother or a bad person. Snowing kissed a lot during that time… are they bad grandparents? Funny how I’ve never heard anyone make that insinuation!

Emma wasn’t ignoring the gravity of the situation they faced. It was a single moment. Now if she’d decided to make out with him instead of following a lead they’d just gotten then I’d listen to you… but as Killian says “you have to enjoy the quiet moments” and that was a quiet moment. And she wasn’t getting any urgent calls either… soooo… shut up and enjoy the chemistry.

It’s fine not to like CaptainSwan but can we at least stop trying to rewrite the show? Thanks.

Anything you’d like me to debunk? Send me a message or let me know in the comments!

[firelxdykatara]

I was the anon who sent the ask about cs, and you actually addressed some of the major arguments i've seen - being with hook turned emma from a strong, independent woman into just a love interest, hook pursued emma with no reciprocated feelings, and that he never really redeemed himself. I've also seen arguments that cs is abusive, which i've seen to some extent in anti-kataang posts. i try not to dive too deep into the anti tag for my own sanity but these are some of the main things i've seen

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ok, sorry, i was just caught up in the euphoria of reminiscing about my captain swan feelings that for a moment there i lived in a world where the Anti CS Brigade didn’t exist. but no, yeah, i know exactly what you’re talking about and honestly i think i just......blocked 90% of it from my mind because so many of those arguments were so vitriolic and widespread but also baseless, like...

gods, ok, here we go. anon you have activated my dormant ouat wordvomit processors and idk if i’ll be able to shut up any time soon but i have A Lot Of Thoughts Here, and also a lot of really bad memories cause ye gods, the ouat shipping wars of the days of yore were vicious.

ANYWAY, like, the vast majority of these arguments came from the ‘swan queen nation’, which is where you can trace a lot of super toxic wlw ship stans back to--just for a little context, but clexa and supercorp both had their roots in swan queen, among other ships, but those are the Big Three i always go back to because what they have in common is ‘the main character of the series is explicitly abused/treated horribly by another woman and for some reason the shippers go nuts over this pairing and will insist the show is queerbaiting them if this specific pairing is not made canon’. and swan queen stans, in particular, had it out for captain swan, because they were incredibly insistent about regina and emma being in love, and naturally the existence of emma’s romantic arc with killian threatened that.

as a result, they quite literally made shit up.

it’s funny (not ‘funny ha ha’ but like funny depressing), because a lot of what they accused CS of is actually shit that happened explicitly on screen with regina and emma. they claimed that emma was no longer strong or independent because she fell in love with killian, while ignoring the fact that she’d become a literal doormat for regina’s many abuses (there are so many things regina did to emma even after her alleged redemption which, if she weren’t being so coddled by the narrative, emma would never have let her get away with--like blaming her for saving the life of a woman regina had murdered in the past, or like telling emma to her face that she wanted to tear killian’s throat out because he managed to come back from the underworld while the man regina loved stayed dead) because, for some reason, they interpreted emma being happy and no longer closed off to the people she loved, choosing to let down the walls she’d built up over a lifetime of trauma as her being ‘reduced to a love interest’ which just did not happen.

like, factually, straight up, emma was every bit as badass while dating killian as she was back in season 1. the only difference is, in season 1 emma didn’t trust anyone, she was closed off, she had a million walls built high around her by trauma, and she wasn’t willing to let anyone in because she believed that if she did then she’d only be traumatized again when they inevitably left. by season 4, when she started officially dating killian, many of those walls had come down, she was happier and healthier, she was falling in love and she was letting herself be in love, she had her parents, her son, the whole town full of people she loved. she was fucking happy, but she wasn’t happy with the right love interest, so swan queen shippers insisted they wanted ‘season 1 emma back’. because they would rather emma be miserable so they could interpret her antagonism with regina as closeted gay pining, than have her dare to be happy with a man and a family that didn’t include regina.

as to the other claims, while hook did make his feelings for emma clear once he realized he felt them, the ball was in her court almost completely. he made comments, told her how he felt, said things like ‘when i win your heart, and i will win it, it will be because you want me’ where the clear emphasis was on emma’s feelings--he believed she had some feeling for him, but he wanted anything between them to be because it was what she wanted. emma initiated every explicitly romantic interaction. killian made a flirty comment, which he was wont to do, and which she could easily have brushed off--instead, she grabbed him by the coat and yanked him into a kiss which lasted far longer than it needed to if all she wanted to do was make a point. (sorry, that scene is just burned into the brain of every CS shipper, i know it literally by heart lmfao) he made it clear that if she wanted him he would be there, but i she didn’t he wasn’t going to push her. he followed her through an entire damn portal into the past because he wanted to help her, because he’d go anywhere for her--to the end of the world, or time--but emma was the one who invited him to dinner with her family. emma was the one who noticed he hadn’t come in yet, and went to see him. emma was the one who kissed him, initiating their relationship.

like @storynightlight said in the replies to the last ask you sent, a majority of the important milestones in killian and emma’s relationship were initiated by emma. she was the one constantly progressing their relationship, it went entirely at her pace in large part because one damaged soul recognizes another, and killian had been through enough trauma in his long (long, long) life to understand that emma needed to work things through on her own terms. he wanted to be part of her life, but it had to be when she was willing to let him in. and he was perfectly content to wait for her to be ready.

as far as the ‘abuse’ claims go, that was honestly just straight up fabrication on the part of swan queen shippers mostly, which is intensely ironic considering the state of emma and regina’s ‘friendship’ for literally the entire damn series. most of them referenced things that happened while emma and killian were enemies (they called their sword fight ‘abuse’, which like.... i’m sorry but two people on opposite sides of a violent conflict having a fight is not abuse, and incidentally that’s an argument that zutara gets hit with too, to this day, clearly words don’t actually mean things anymore), and ignored the fact that killian’s behavior changed as his redemption arc progressed. he didn’t become a good upstanding citizen overnight, but he did feel remorse for his prior bad actions and the harm he caused, he went to great lengths to make up for that harm when and where he could, and he tried to be as good a man as he possibly could in later seasons, even when circumstances (like, oh, gold having possession of his heart and using it to control him, which anti CSers also blamed him for, go figure) made that nearly impossible.

meanwhile, as late as season 6, regina was still blaming emma for everything that went wrong in her life. regina happily browbeat emma about everything she ‘stole’ from her for basically the entire series. regina, in the context of their friendship after her alleged redemption, was constantly verbally and emotionally abusive to emma--and yet that behavior was completely overlooked, or deemed ‘pining’ or some other obvious evidence of romantic feelings, by swan queen shippers who would prefer to claim emma was being abused by her caring and loyal boyfriend who constantly believed in her even when she had trouble believing in herself. (incidentally, it truly is incredibly rich of regina stans (and rumple stans, a lot of them say this too) to claim that killian never redeemed himself, when regina is the one with a vault full of hearts she never returned to their proper owners, and regina is the one who murdered someone emma cared about and never confessed to it, let alone apologized for it; graham died in emma’s arms while regina crushed his heart, and it was never once brought up again. regina got away with it scott free, and it is just one on a list of crimes she literally never expressed even the slightest bit of remorse for, let alone tried to atone for. yet killian is the one who ‘never redeemed himself’ mmhmmm ok sure jan.)

I’M SO SORRY ANON, you probably had no idea the can of Worms you were opening with these asks, but CLEARLY i still have a lot of damn feelings about this fucking show lmfao. THANK YOU THOUGH!!! i haven’t talked about captain swan or even really reminisced much in a while, and i miss them a lot, so it was nice to dive back into my Feelings and remember so much of what i loved about them! i may do a rewatch soon >.> it’s ok if i just skip 4b except the finale and then turn it off immediately after emma and killian’s reunion at the end and pretend the entire show ended there, right????

i hope you’re having a good night! thanks again for the asks <33

[let-it-raines]

I’ve been in such a Neverland/3a kinda mood with fic reading lately, so I figured I’d send my fave CS fic writer a prompt! Or not really a prompt... I’m giving you free reign of everything, I just want to read something from you set in that time period ❤️

@dorisquinn you flatter me so because I am the worst at writing canon and/or canon divergence, but I figured why not? I 100% went down the road of neverland smut because, well, I’ve never done that before, and I feel like that’s a right of passage here. lol. If you want something different, shoot me a message and I’ll try to figure something else out! 💕 

thanks to @shireness-says for making me sprint so that I actually wrote for once

found on ao3 | here | 

-/-

She’s quiet tonight, but really, he would never expect otherwise, especially after everything that’s managed to transpire today.

Rarely is Emma Swan a woman of many words, but now? Now when they are in the most dreaded place in all of the realms, at least to him, and she is constantly working to try to save her boy? Now she is more silent and pensive than ever, but the fire behind her emerald eyes burns just as brightly as always.

As someone often on the receiving end of her rage, he knows that look and that flame better than most.

He knows that look because he feels it too.

Or, well, he felt it, long ago, and on occasion, sparks flicker back to life, the fire igniting and burning so brightly that he thinks the inferno will begin again with no chance of being extinguished.

Yet, as he sits with his back against a hardened tree and watches Emma ignore her parents fervently talking, he knows that what he feels is not the same.

He knows that he does not have a child, no matter how much he felt like Bae was his, and while his loss stings far more than Killian is willing to admit to himself, it is not the same. It is not Emma missing Henry, constantly worried over his well-being as she keeps their little group from killing each other, and while he is not particularly fond of any of their partners in this adventure, at least he is not counting on a woman he despises and parents who blatantly do not understand him to save the one person in the world who matters most to him.

Oh, and a dastardly pirate who not a soul trusts even though his intentions are good. He swears of it, but it has been a long damn time since someone believed in him like that.

The Charmings do not seem to find him capable of living up to their namesake, but he can’t blame them. His first impression was not one he would call particularly good.

Lies, deceit, violence and the works, but he was in a different mindset then. He didn’t know these people, didn’t have any inkling as to who they were, and he had an end goal in mind that he would have done anything to accomplish.

Still would, most likely, but there’s decidedly something different now. When he wakes up, his first thought is not of vengeance. Those thoughts creep in often, but they are not everything.

He’s been given a reminder that he might be capable of more than the evil he’s been for longer than he’d care to admit.

Killian has done horrible things, has ruined lives, and he won’t pretend he has not. If Snow White can forgive the woman who ruined her life in more ways than one can count despite the Queen showing little remorse, maybe Killian can be worthy of the same kind of forgiveness.

Though, he cares little for the forgiveness of Snow or trying to get on her good side.

But he is here and helping to save Emma’s lad, and he knows this devilish island better than anyone else here.

Well, the Crocodile is wandering around here somewhere and tends to know more than he should, but Killian prefers to think of him as little as possible lest he get caught up thinking of his own vengeance and not the goal here.

Henry.

Bae’s son, which Killian still can’t quite believe.

Emma’s son.

That’s why he’s here. That is all, even if David keeps telling Killian that he is only here to seduce Emma. Killian chuckles to himself. That might be nice, but that is not his goal.

If he is to win her heart, it will not be out of any trickery or misdeeds.

If he is to win her heart, it will not be dishonestly. That hasn’t been important to him in centuries, but there she goes again, reminding him of things he has forgotten.

There’s a rustle of leaves, and Killian stops sketching words into the dirt with his hook and prepares himself for battle with one of the Lost Boys before realizing that it’s simply Emma standing from her spot.

And walking toward him.

Well, maybe he’ll be preparing for a battle of another kind then.

She settles down next to him, the tree’s width large enough for them both to have a place to rest their backs, and he can feel the heat of her skin flicker across his as her hand accidentally brushes against his own. She doesn’t say anything, doesn’t explain her presence, and he silently reaches for his flask and hands it over to her. She takes it and then downs a healthy amount of rum. His preferred kind is strong, likes to burn down his throat despite his tolerance, and there’s a part of him that is always impressed by how easily Emma can handle it.

As those words flicker through his mind, he’s immediately brought back to earlier today, to his taunting and teasing. All he wanted to do was get a rise out of her. It’s simply so bloody fun to see her nose scrunch and her eyes roll, and while he’s wanted to kiss Emma for weeks now, to feel how soft her pretty pink lips are, he was not expecting her to take him up on his offer.

Then again, Emma is always surprising him.

The way she grabbed his coat and pulled him to her sent heat to his groin almost immediately, and there was a hunger in her kiss that he felt in his own. It’s been decades since he felt a fire like that deep in his belly, and Killian was reminded of just how much he likes when a woman takes charge of her own desires.

(Another reminder, another reminder, another reminder.)

He simply did not expect for his desires to turn into a want that he’s dared not hope for again.

It was a reminder that he didn’t want, that good things could happen to him, but he knows who he is to this woman and these people. He’s an outsider, and if David’s words earlier weren’t clear enough, he is not welcome amongst them.

And yet, here is this fierce woman who has been like a siren to him, calling him back when he wants to stray, sitting so close to him that her thigh keeps brushing against his own.

The jungle is quiet tonight outside of their camp. He hears no birds or other creatures, only the crackle of the fire and the words being shared between Charming and Snow White. They’ve been huddled close together ever since Snow was informed of her husband’s condition, and while it is obnoxious to have to view, Killian so wishes he’d had time like that with Liam. It’s not a happy future for the two of them, especially having to be separated from their daughter and grandson should they chose to stay here to be together, but it is a future.

There is a possibility of one, and that’s more than most people get.

It’s more than he got.  

The Queen is hidden behind a tree across camp, avoiding everyone, and truly, it should be the other way around. He’s no saint, but that woman ruined this family. He understands that a young Snow shared a secret that had horrible consequences, and while Regina was certainly a victim there, she is not one now. At least when it comes to this family. Her son is in trouble, but no one in this camp is at fault for that.

He needs to get off this damn island. It’s giving him too much time to think about people he should not be giving a second thought to.

“How does this rum never run out?” Emma suddenly asks.

She hands him the flask back, and he takes his own sip. “It’s enchanted.” “How’d you manage that?”

“I’ve gotten around.” Emma snickers, and he arches his brow. “Something funny, Swan?”

“Nope. Nothing at all.”

Killian hums and tucks the flask back into his pocket. “I’m aware of what the phrase ‘getting around’ means, love. I was in your world long enough to pick up on a few things.”

“Of course you would pick up on innuendos.”

He winks, and there’s that eye roll he so fancies. “I do my best to make sure I’m well versed in things that I need to be well versed in. Makes life easier.”

“Innuendos make your life easier?”

“When it comes to beautiful women such as you, aye.”

“Do you always flirt to get what you want?” “Why, darling, are you admitting that I’m flirting with you? Are you going to return my affections?”

She kicks at the dirt and turns away from him.

Push and pull.

Push harder. Pull further away.

That’s Emma.

“No matter,” Killian continues, waving his hand in the air in front of them. “Did you come to sit with me for any particular reason? Perhaps to get away from your parents?”

She groans next to him. “I can’t listen to it anymore. I mean, I can’t imagine how they feel, but I – you know what, never mind.”

“Pan got your tongue?”

His lips curl up at the same time that hers pull down into a frown. She is obviously not amused by him tonight.

“My apologies, milady,” he sighs before standing from his spot. The leaves rustle underneath him, but no one from the other side of the camp notices his movement. They’re all too wrapped up in their own lives.

Emma cranes her neck up to look at him, and he’s never seen someone so swan-like. She lives up to her name, but with Emma, he thinks it must be the other way around.

“Are you going somewhere?”

He tilts his head to the side. “I, too, would like to have some time away from the doting lovers and the moaning queen, so I thought I’d take a walk. I know this area well enough to know that we’re near the beach. Would you like to join me?”

Her eyes narrow and dart over to her parents and then back to him. “Is that safe?”

Killian pats his sword with his hook. “I’ve got weapons, as do you. I think we’ll be fine. C’mon, love. I know you need to have your mind taken off of things. This island will drive you insane if you don’t find something that calms you.”

Emma’s shoulders sag before she stands and steps up to him. “What was that for you?”

He swaggers closer, the magnetic field around her always pulling him those few inches forward, and then dips his head so she has a direct view of his wink. “A man likes to keep his secrets, love, but if you play your cards right, I might let you in on it.”

“Can’t you ever be straightforward about anything?”

“I find that I’m straightforward about many things. You simply never pay attention because it’s not what you want to hear.”

Killian doesn’t bother to wait for her reaction. Instead, he turns on his feels, grabs a lit lantern, and starts heading down the path they made earlier to make his way to the beach. He can hear the ocean waves already. It’s a sound that usually calms him, one that he’s nearly always searching for, but here, the echo is different. It’s loud and brash even when the waves are gentle, and he aches for the sound of the waves in the Enchanted Forest or even those of the ones in Storybrooke.

Anything other than this.

Anything.

Emma’s boots crunch behind him, and he lifts an overgrown branch until she steps underneath it and begins walking at his side. A part of him doubted that she would actually follow, but deep down, he knew the odds were more in his favor than disfavor. She’s silent as they walk, but occasionally her hand will brush against his arm, and he feels the heat of her touch spread over him.

There are no truly nefarious plans in his mind as to what they are to do on the beach once they get there, and he wouldn’t be opposed to simply watching the moonlight glint off the water. However, he knows what he was implying when he suggested them leaving the campsite, and he knows that Emma does, too.

A one-time thing, she’d said. Emma may possess a superpower for telling when others are lying, but she’s not the only one who is good at reading people.

The beach comes into view past a few vines and bushes, and Killian slashes through them with his sword before putting it back in its holster and stepping over the newly slain foliage. Emma steps behind him, following exactly in his footsteps, and then all of the sudden the sound of footsteps stop when they step onto the sand.

That was the one good thing about these beaches. It’s soft sand instead of hard pebbles.

There’s a scratch of nails down his back, a faint feeling through the thick material of his leather, and Killian twists his head to see Emma standing so close that he can see all of the freckles on her face, counting them one by one until he knows them as he knows the constellations in the sky.

He’s rather more interested in them than the constellations here.

“You were saying something about getting my mind off things?”

Killian nods and reaches his hand up to tuck her loose hair behind her ear, and his fingers ghost across her cheek, feeling the soft, velvet skin. He’s seen many a beautiful woman in his few hundred years, but there’s something different about this one that he believes might not be physical after all.

Though, she certainly is beautiful in that way.

“Aye, love, I believe I was.”

And then he dips his head and slants his mouth over hers. The initial shock is much the same as it was earlier today, but this time, it’s his turn to take charge. He gets to thread his hand into her hair first and pull her into him before she can grab onto the lapels of his coat, and he gets to control the pace. It’s fast and heady, her tongue already swiping across his bottom lip, and while he wouldn’t mind slowing it down to savor the feeling of her, that’s not what either of them need.

That’s especially not what Emma needs.

It’s been awhile since he’s done this, his taste for bar wenches fading away a long time ago, but the movements haven’t been lost on him. The push and pull, the teasing and tasting, it’s all second nature, but right now, it feels new.

Everything about this is refreshing, but he has to push those thoughts down. He’s had too many sentimental ones about Emma today, too many realizations and questions since their dalliance, and this isn’t a time to think of him yet again not getting something he craves because he isn’t good enough. This is the time to let his body take over and to forget.

That’s why they came here after all.

Emma’s hands tug on his lapels before moving to the inside of his jacket. She runs them over his chest and over the chains hanging from his neck before they settle on his shoulders. He can feel her nails much more clearly with only the thin layer of his shirt keeping her from his skin, and his eyes shut even more tightly at the feel of it all as his tongue tangles with Emma’s in slide so perfectly in sync that he doesn’t believe it’s real.

This is real, this is real, this is real.

“You tell no one of this,” Emma grunts against his lips as she works to remove his coat from his shoulders.

“Aye, I understand.” His hook tugs against her backside, and he releases his hand from her locks to help her take off his coat. It’s heavier than he would like, but it’s what he’s needed to keep warm in ports and on the deck of the Jolly over the years. Now, it will be a nice barrier between the two of them in the sand. “It will be a private dalliance between us.”

“Do you always have to talk like that?” “Like what?”

“Like you’re from a Jane Austen novel?”

“What’s that?”

That gets a smile from Emma, and maybe he’ll be destined to only make her smile when she’s teasing or feeling superior over him not knowing something about her world. For now, he’ll take it.

“She’s a writer. She writes romance.”

“Oh? You read those? I didn’t take you for the type.”

“Shut up,” she groans, pushing him down until he gets the idea and settles down on the ground. Emma sinks down onto her knees and settles on his hips before she dips her head and rejoins her lips to his. “Just be quiet, okay?”

“As you wish.”

Her mouth stills at the words, the same ones he used earlier, but then she’s continuing the kiss, and Killian can feel her over every inch of her. His skin is prickling and beginning to become sweat-soaked once more, but now that he’s without his coat, he can feel the cool breeze of the ocean wafting up onto his skin. He doesn’t know how long they lay in the sand with their mouths moving together with no destination in mind until he feels Emma’s hands near his trousers. She’s pulling apart the laces, and as her mouth breaks away for her to get more access to it, he takes the opportunity to pull at her blouse with his hook. She gasps at the touch, but she doesn’t push him away. Her skin is sun-kissed and glistening with sweat, and her chest is heaving, heart obviously beating as quickly as his is. He swears that he can feel it, but he knows that’s not true.

She’s glowing underneath the moonlight and the flickering of the lantern, and this may be the first time he’s been truly fond of the moon here in a lifetime.

There he goes thinking those thoughts again, and he swore to himself that he would not do that.

Ever tried, ever failed.

Finally, he gets her blouse down enough that he can see the roundness of her breast, and Killian groans at the sight. He’s spent more nights than he’s willing to admit dreaming about something like this, but the reality is much better.

Bloody hell.

Her hand brushes over him through his leathers, and he hisses. But the pain is good, a pleasant burn, and Killian lifts himself to lick away sweat that is gather on Emma’s collarbone. Her skin is salty on his tongue, and he savors it.

“Why the hell are your pants so frustrating?”

“I believe it takes a more patient hand.”

“I don’t have any time for patience,” she huffs, and he notices that her hands are shaking and that she really is struggling to get his leathers down. Killian takes the opportunity to lift his hips to help her, and she finally gets them tugged down, smiling as his cock juts out.

Well, maybe that’s another way he can get an elusive smile out of her.

“Aha,” she laughs, almost giddily.

“I don’t believe that’s a reaction I’ve ever had before.”

She shrugs and starts working with her own bottoms. She handles them much better than she handled his, the zipper easily tugging down and the material peeled off of her so that he can see the toned legs she possesses, all of her muscles defined.

Beautiful.

His mind simply can’t get past that.

“Yeah, well, I’m always one for new things.”

Emma kicks her trousers off until they’re resting on the sand, and she settles back on top of his hips, her softness brushing over his hardness. She’s more ready than he thought she would be, but he’s certainly not going to complain, not when he so desperately needs to be inside of her. Maybe if he’s allowed to do this again, which he doubts, he’ll be able to take the time he usually would with someone like her.

Someone who is more than a conquest.

Someone who should be treasured.

“Really, now?” he questions. “In that case – ”

She slaps his chest, and he grabs onto her hand, holding it to his chest as he chuckles.

“Didn’t I tell you to be quiet?”

“Aye, and while I do so love a woman who takes charge, you have to let a man have a little fun.”

Her groan is frustrated as she tilts his head back, making her neck swan-like again, and all he can think is how much he wants to bite the delicate skin. But that thought is quickly dissipated when Emma takes him in hand, stroking him a few times, before guiding him into her.

Bloody fuck.

It’s better than he could ever imagine to feel her warmth stretching around him and to hear the groan straining in the back of her throat. She’s a vision like this, still half-dressed but entirely indecent, and he almost tells her so before her hands clutch at his shoulders and grab onto the chains around his neck. They’re the only cool thing about this moment, the Neverland heat and heat of their activities consuming him, and it’s a nice touch to feel the mementos he’s collected over the years.

He wishes that he had a way to collect this moment.

“Fuck,” she hisses as she begins a gentle rocking, adjusting a testing out this new position they’re now in. “Fuck.”

“At a loss for words there, Swan?” “Don’t be cocky.”

He juts his hips up at her words, and she moans, and digs her nails into his skin so hard he may bleed.

“Apologies, love,” he says, not meaning it.

In fact, he can’t keep the smile off his face. He’s sure she despises it, but Killian doesn’t care to stop himself when he hasn’t felt this good in ages.

But they’re doing this to forget, he reminds himself, not to remember.

They quickly find a rhythm that works for the both of them. Emma takes control, like he knew she would, and continually changes up how deep he enters her over and over again. It’s like she can’t figure out if she wants shallow or deep, fast or slow, and eventually he tires of it and wraps his arms around her to flip them over, careful not to hurt her with his hook. She gasps at the movement and opens her mouth to say something, but then he’s pushing into her as his mouth deliciously slants over hers.

Emma hooks her foot against his backside, pushing him further inside of her, and he can feel his heart between his ears as he finds the pace that he wants. Her nails keep scratching into his back, and Killian groans before trailing his mouth away from Emma’s to find her ear. He begins whispering to her, working around her rule of him not being loud, and when she complains, he tells her that he’s very much being quiet. Besides, he thinks that words he whispers to her keep her from protesting anymore.

He’s getting close, his high nearing the edge, and he props himself up on his left arm so he can reach between them and rub his thumb over where they’re joined. Emma lets out a long moan that he hasn’t heard before, and then he feels her fluttering, feels her falling around him.

Fuck.

The feeling nearly causes him to fall right there, but he has enough mind to pull out and take himself in hand to finish himself off since he doesn’t believe Emma has any of the potions that prevent pregnancy with her.

This was never really in either of their plans.

Going off of plan is quite possibly the best thing that’s ever happened to him on this damned island.

He’s almost there, teetering on the edge with shaky limbs, and as soon as he feels Emma’s soft hands on him, he’s gone.

Afterward, they don’t spend time lingering on the sand. Before they can catch their breaths, Emma is standing and straightening herself up, tugging her clothes down and back on, and he does the same. Though, he’s much slower than her, partially due to his hand but mostly due to the fact that he doesn’t seem to be fighting the internal war Emma is.

He knows that he just slept with a woman he fancies from time to time, while she just slept with a man she most likely still finds despicable despite them getting along rather well lately.

Nothing like a crisis to bond people.

“Thanks for that,” she finally mutters as she twists her locks back to remove them from her face. She’s flushed, the heat still lingering, and he can see the slightest bit of redness on her chest from where his beard rubbed against her. “It was…”

“Bloody satisfying.”

“Yeah,” she huffs, her lips turning up even as she looks away from him. “But also, a one-time thing. I mean that this time. Today has been complicated.”

“Aye, Swan,” Killian sighs, “whatever you say.”

He’ll respect her wishes with no hesitation, but like he thought earlier, Emma isn’t the only one who knows when someone is telling a lie.