#but I've always wondered what the character themselves are thinking in that moment

[vault81]

Jack Cooke's Travel Log: Springvale - 17/08/2277

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"First impressions of Springvale, it's a bit of dump. I mean it's not its fault, I'm sure a nuclear war would do that to any place, but I expected... more? more... recovery? more.. people! but it's just.. empty.. I wonder how many of these people made it to the Vault? if they were let in at all."

"There's only 3 'intact' buildings left in this entire town, well 3 buildings that don't look like a gentle breeze would knock them over. I also spotted what looks like a settlement to the south! must be this 'Megaton' Old Lady Palmer's logs mentioned! I'd guess its maybe.. an hour? an hour and a half walk? If he'd stop anywhere I'm guessing its there! I'll make my way over once I've had a look at this elementary school, If I'm lucky I can find some supplies there!"

"Well.. *huff* I.. *huff* didn't expect... *huff* there to be people in these ruins. They didn't even try and talk to me, they just charged at me! This one woman.. she... that look in her eyes.. I uh. I had to shoot her, shoot all of them.. It was self defence.. right? I... I.. didn't have any other choice right?! fuck I feel sick.. I think I'm gonna sit down for a while, then head to that settlement.. You know what? I was right, this place is a fucking dum-"

[d-targaryenshoe]

Reflected Love - Benedict Bridgerton

Word Count: 1761

Summary: When one does not see the beauty of themselves, maybe the person that loves them the most can show them, can they not?

You sat in the corner of the room, your gaze fixed upon your husband as he carefully mixed the paints on his palette.

His concentration was absolute, his movements precise and deliberate. You couldn't help but marvel at the way he could lose himself in his work, becoming utterly absorbed by the process of creation.

It was as if he were a different person when he was painting.

You recalled the first time you had seen him in this form when you were still courting.

He had been painting a portrait of you, and you had felt a strange mix of awe and vulnerability as you had watched him capture your likeness on canvas.

It was as if he had been able to see straight into your soul, revealing a depth of understanding that you hadn't known was there.

The canvas he was working on now was a landscape, a serene meadow with a winding stream and a stand of trees in the distance.

The sunlight danced across the scene, casting dappled shadows that you could almost feel on your skin.

It was a peaceful image, a study in tranquility, and you wondered if it was meant to represent something particular in his mind.

You were about to ask him when he paused, his brush hovering above the canvas. "What do you think, dearest?" His voice was soft, almost tentative.

You considered the question for a moment. The light was beginning to fade, and the room was growing dim.

You moved closer to the painting, your eyes taking in the details that you hadn't noticed from afar.

"It's beautiful, Ben," you said truthfully. "It reminds me of the day we picnicked at the lake, just outside of town."

He looked up at you, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. "You remember that?"

You nodded, your heart swelling at the memory. "Of course, It was one of my favorite days with you."

He smiled, his gaze lingering on you for a moment before he returned to his painting. "I'm glad you think so. I've been trying to capture that feeling of serenity and peace in this landscape. Do you think I've succeeded?"

You studied the painting once more, taking in the way the colors danced across the canvas, the gentle brushstrokes that created the impression of a soft breeze rippling through the grass and the leaves of the trees.

"Yes, I believe you have, love. It's beautiful." you paused, your eyes meeting his once more. "But there's something else I've been wanting to speak to you about."

Your husband's brush hovered over the canvas, waiting for you to continue. He had always been attentive to you, and quick to offer support and understanding.

You took a deep breath, gathering your courage. "It's about myself," you said softly. "Lately, I've been feeling rather self-conscious. I've been wondering if I look...different to you."

Benedict's brow furrowed in confusion. "Different? Of course not, my love. You're the most beautiful woman in the world to me." He set his brush down on the palette and turned to face you. "Why do you ask?"

"Just rather curious, yet you're my husband, I felt like I wanted to know."

Your words hung in the air between you, and Benedict took a moment to consider his response. He knew that you were likely referring to the change in your relationship since courting became a marriage.

"I do see you differently now, my love," he said gently. "But not in a way that makes you any less gorgeous or desirable to me. I see the depth of your soul, the strength of your character, the love that you bring into my life."

He moved closer to you, taking your hands in his. "You are my wife, y/n, and nothing will ever change that."

You smiled at his words, feeling the warmth of his touch. "I know that. It's just...I want to make sure you're happy. I want to be the woman you need me to be."

Benedict held out his hand towards you. "May I?"

You nodded, your heart swelling with emotion. As he took your hand in his, you felt a sense of peace and reassurance wash over you. "What are you going to do?"

"Trust me," Benedict answered, leading you over to the long mirror that was placed in the corner of the room, standing behind you.

He started to undo the ties of your dress, making the fabric fall down to the ground.

"I want you to close your eyes," he whispered, his voice low and gentle. "And just feel."

You hesitated for a moment, then obeyed. You felt the cool air caress your skin as he moved your hair aside, exposing your neck.

His touch was so light, so gentle, that it sent shivers down your spine. You breathed in deeply, letting the sensations wash over you.

You felt his fingers trace circles on your back, and you arched your spine instinctively, wanting more.

It was a strange, intoxicating feeling, being so vulnerable and yet so desired. You could hear the soft rustle of his clothes as he moved closer, and the warmth of his body against yours made your heart race.

With a soft moan, you let your head fall back against his shoulder, allowing him to guide your movements.

His touch was confident and sure, and you felt utterly safe in his embrace. He placed a tender kiss at the base of your neck, sending a shiver down your spine.

"Look at yourself," he whispered, his voice thick with desire. "Look at how captivating you are."

You obeyed, opening your eyes and gazing into the mirror.

The reflection showed you how Benedict had his strong arms wrapped tightly around you.

She could see the intensity in his eyes as he looked down at you, his expression one of pure adoration.

As he continued to hold you close, you could feel the hardness of his body against yours, and you longed for him.

His touch was so gentle and tender, yet so possessive and demanding. He lowered his head and kissed you deeply, his tongue dancing with yours.

You moaned into his mouth, arching your back as he took control, your bodies moving in perfect sync.

He guided your hands to his chest, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips.

You ran your nails lightly across his skin, teasing him, and he growled with pleasure.

Benedict pulled away from the kiss, gazing down at you with fierce adoration. "I need you," he breathed, his voice thick with desire.

You arched your back, offering yourself to him. "Have me," you whispered, feeling a delicious ache spread through your body.

He moved with a grace that belied his strength, guiding your hips to meet his rhythm.

Your bodies moved together in perfect harmony, each stroke deeper and more urgent than the last.

Your nails dug into his shoulders, leaving tiny half-moons in his skin as he drove into you, claiming you as his own.

You gasped his name, your breath coming in ragged gasps as your bodies moved together in a dance of desire.

He kissed you roughly, his tongue tangling with yours, his teeth grazing your bottom lip.

You arched your back, feeling the familiar tension building deep within you.

You could feel the pull between you both, the connection that went beyond physical desire.

It was as if you were two halves of a whole, perfectly fitted together. He thrust into you harder, faster, his eyes locked on your reflection in the mirror.

"You're so beautiful," he growled, his voice rough with desire.

You moaned in reply, arching your back to meet his thrusts. "I want you," you breathed, feeling the familiar tension building deep within you. "I need you."

Benedict growled, his movements becoming more urgent as he drove deeper inside you.

He leaned in, capturing your lips in a fierce kiss, his tongue dancing with yours.

You could feel his strength, his power, as he held you close, his hands running down your back, cupping your bottom, lifting you higher against him.

"Oh God," you moaned, your voice breaking as you moved with him, your bodies in perfect sync.

You could feel the mirror under your hands, and the contrast between the hard surface and the softness of his skin only served to heighten your senses.

Benedict's movements grew more urgent, his breath coming in ragged gasps as he looked into your eyes.

"That was..."

Your words trailed off as you clung to Benedict, your bodies still entwined. The intensity of your lovemaking had left you both breathless, your hearts racing.

You could feel the warmth of his skin against yours, the steady rhythm of his breath in your ear.

He had been so rough with you, driving into you with such urgency, but it hadn't been overwhelming. It had been exactly what you needed.

You felt a shiver run down your spine as you remembered the look in his eyes, the way he had looked at you as if you were the only person in the world.

You knew that you had given yourself to him completely, and in that moment, you couldn't imagine ever wanting anyone else.

As your breathing began to steady, you could feel the weight of his body pressing against yours, the warmth of his skin.

You could still feel the mark of his hands on your hips, the impression of his fingers against your skin.

It was as if he had left a part of himself there, branding you as his own.

"Not that, but you, you are, the center of everything I do," Benedict said.

You ran your fingers through his hair, feeling the softness of it against your fingertips. "So are you," you replied, looking deeply into his eyes.

"But if I'm right, we're still very naked in this room where every moment one of your siblings can walk in."

Benedict chuckled, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "Oh, they won't bother us," he assured you. "They know I adore the art of nude portraits." His words sent a shiver down your spine.

"I love you."

You whispered the words as you gazed up into his eyes, your heart racing. You felt so exposed and vulnerable in this moment, but at the same time, so free.

He had always made you feel this way as if you were the most important person in the world.

As if there was nothing you couldn't do or be with him by your side.

[sugoi-writes]

Lucifer Morningstar x Reader - Aftercare

Some silly, Luci aftercare... because I need to practice other characters during my hyperfocus-time HAHAH

MDNI... Y E E T 🦆🐤❤️

For the nth time that morning, your partner was able to bring you to paradise. Your eyes fell closed as your head lolled to the side, breathing ragged. You couldn't produce a coherent thought as your arm came to lay across your eyes. Your core felt almost numb from the overwhelming stimulation, and for a moment, you felt lightheaded from your efforts.

You trembled and whined as your body calmed down from your quick death, Lucifer's movement slowing down before ceasing all together. You shivered as you felt dexterous fingers and spaded tail leave you, almost tasting the grin that was sent your way.

"Honey, that was... WOW. Good job, baby," Lucifer said, breathless and awkward as he ran his other, clean hand through his sweaty hair.

"That was perfect. ABSOLUTELY perfect..."

He blinked for a moment as he heard quiet, steady breathing, your arm still obscuring your eyes. Lucifer drew impossibly close to you, lifting your arm," Honey~ Honey~? Don't tell me you just fell asleep~" He teased, voice as sweet as the petname he uttered to you. Only to you.

You snorted as you stirred from your impromptu slumber, blinking sleepiness away from your eyes," Wh-what...? No, no, I'm... I'm good. I'm fine. I can keep going--" You ramble, your tone unconvincing as your eyes fluttered again. The angel hovering above you laughs, patting your abdominals gently. You jolted from the stimulation, but relaxed when the touch brought comfort, not pleasure.

"Sweetheart, you can barely make eye contact, let alone keep your eyes open. I think we're done for now. But maybe once I'm back, we can get back to what we started?" You sighed as your arm was moved aside, kind fingers threading through your fussy hair. When he looked at you like this, he almost mistook you for his own kind. He took in the sight of your hair fanned out across his pillow; a sensual imitation of a halo...

Lucifer was absolutely smitten with the sight.

You felt your blood run ice cold as your mind caught up to his words, eyes throwing themselves wide open.

"Oh... oh fuck you still have work, don't you?"

Lucifer presses a kiss to your sweaty forehead, fingers stilling momentarily in your hair," You know it never truly stops, sweetheart... but, I won't be out for long. A few visits, an appointment with Asmodeus... then I'll be back for the rest of the day," Lucifer comforted, his lowered voice reverberating off of his own ribs. The tone made your legs clench together; Luci chuckled at the flattering sight. You whined as the sensual tone of his voice made your mind wonder again, biting your lip to stifle a groan.

"Easy, Tiger... I've got to get ready now. But I'll be back for you soon, okay? Why don't you roll over? We'll need to change the sheets and get you into the shower, too..."

You groan in protest, your legs kicking momentarily. You were imitating a petulant child beautifully; truly, you should have been an actor. Lucifer found your little fit adorable, sitting up on shaky thighs," C'mon, babygirl... One, two... three!" With arms that felt like gelatin, Lucifer rolled you onto your side successfully. He stood up, about to remove the blankets... until he spotted the mess you made. His face flushes suddenly, a nervous smile on his face at sight of the arousal puddle," O-Oh boy, you... yeah, you're definitely tired after all of that."

"...and dehydrated...," you added, your voice slightly hoarse from overuse. Lucifer rolls his eyes, making quick work of the sheet while he worked around you," Honey, let's face it, you always are. Squirting all over my hands just makes it worse~"

You groan, embarrassed by his words as you cover your face. Lucifer raises a brow at you and tries not to rub it in. He moves to your side of the bed to help you to your feet. The both of you groaned at the mutual effort, Lucifer rubbing at his arms while you braced your back. The both of you felt your age wash over your bodies again...

"Was that your first time, y'know... doing that?" Lucifer asked, meek and unassuming. He wouldn't be surprised either way. You nod, your cheeks still burning with embarrassment as Lucifer held your eye contact. Your chin was cradled by the same fingers that pleasured you, making your heart beat wildly.

"B-By someone else, yes... that was... NEW."

Lucifer wiggles his brows at you, making you groan in playful distain. He avoided your playful, sloppy hands as he came behind you. You didnt protest as he gently guided you towards the bathroom, a slew of kisses being pressed to your hunched shoulders.

"Well, lucky for you, that's not the first time I've done that for someone~ And it won't be the last time you do that, either~"

You nearly fall on your ass at the implications of his words, your heart nearly stopping for the nth time that morning. Lucifer is immediately apologizing and coming to your side, throwing your arm over his shoulder. When he's able to get you walking again, he continues.

"Alright, alright, I'll stop~... but I mean it. We're trying that again later~"

"You're washing the sheets if you make me do that again...," you groan, stumbling towards the shower and tub with tired legs. Lucifer smirks as he turns the hot water on, patting your back," A worthy exchange to watch you come undone. I'd do laundry for the rest of time to see you do that again~"

You nearly tackled Lucifer into the shower, the both of you laughing while you did you best to get cleaned up (and not worked up again). While Lucifer was nearly late to his outings, you soaked in the comforts of his shower, hugging yourself. You tried not to get too excited as you cleansed yourself, your mind wondering just what Lucifer would do next time to make you see the stars again...

[vagabond-umlaut]

gesundheit

you deem gojo to be the most stubborn nurse you've ever seen. you suppose you're the most stubborn patient gojo's ever seen.

but what you don't know is you both are the most caring, and the most idiotic, couple of best friends [or perhaps... something else] anyone's ever seen.

▸ student! gojo satoru x student! gn! reader; sickfic; mentions of flu & the medicines treating it [i wish i could include their composition too but no :(((]; a brief appearance of yummy chicken soup; gallons & gallons of tooth-rotting fluff; one sexual innuendo; ETERNALLY PINING 'TORU & ETERNALLY OBLIVIOUS SHORTIE ARE BACK!! :D

▸ belongs to series we're the summer to our winter rain but you can read this as a stand-alone if you wanna!

▸ the gif, divider and characters used ain't mine. please don't plagiarize, translate or repost this. enjoy reading! ❤️

obdurate, obstinate, bull-headed, pig-headed—

you reckon there's no word in the lexicon of any language, from any corner of this world, that can adequately describe the boy crouched before you.

furrowed brows barely visible from behind the unkempt white bangs, gojo shoots you a woefully concerned look, so much so that it makes you wanna smack it right off his face– and says, "your temperature is still above 100, shortie. you sure you took all the medications right on time?"

"i did," you grit out through clenched teeth and a hoarse throat before a fit of cough racks through your warm body, making you clutch onto your blankets for dear life while the airways fight to expel the irritants into the tissue you've pressed over the lower two-thirds of your face—

a painful battle which continues for a good portion of a minute or two before ending– temporarily— you toss the tissue into the overflowing trash can few feet away and return to glaring at your best friend, with a very exhausted, very frustrated sigh.

gojo's shades glint back innocently in the low light of the television as the boy dutifully places the thermometer in its box then moves to put the lids back on the tupperware he brought you dinner in.

you sigh yet again, wrapping the blankets tighter round yourself.

"sometimes, i wonder if you ever learnt to read, y'know?" you mumble in a soft voice, yet its tone mad enough to make him flinch as he rises from the carpet– having cleared the center table of the remainders of the chicken soup haibara made for you– only to cover it a tiny second later with anti-pyretics, cough syrups, nasal decongestants, inhalers-

gasp of shock worsening into a scratchy cough, you wheeze out, "did you really not read my messages, 'toru? i asked u to leave my soup at the doorstep but you warped right to the centre of my living room— i also asked you not to buy any medicine for me, i already bought them today, but- but- you literally bought the entire medicine shop for me!"

"yeah. and?" the white-haired boy retorts, short and sweet with that eye-crinkling beam of his– one he knows never not works on you, "it isn't like i don't have the means to afford it. and as for your orders via the messages..."

he trails off, shooting you a wink as he moves to plop down near your feet on the sofa and drawls, "i've always been a brat. why don't ya put me back in my place, huh?"

in his place... don't tell me this idiot's speaking of...

"is that supposed to be a bdsm thing, satoru?" you inquire, genuinely confused. concerned. "and you should raise your standards, y'know? thinking a person sick and dying from a flu to be attractive enough to apply a pick-up line on them; i hone– hey, no, why the fuck are you—"

"scoot. over."

neither gojo's stony tone nor his pinched features brook any room for you to disagree, yet you decide not to be held back by such, legs and arms struggling to free themselves from the blanket to push the way too tall figure squeezing you into the sofa as he lies down beside you.

not even a moment passes before your blankets are rudely ripped off your body, then dumped on the floor beneath. swallowing back a sigh of relief– the fan feels so good!– you muster a glower to shoot at your best friend.

earning an eyeroll and a huff, you know are fond, in reply.

"the paracetamol will be kicking in soon, and you'll start sweating like hell then," the boy explains, plucking his shades off and placing them on the table beside, "and that sweat needs to get evaporated asap for your fever to reduce asap— which won't happen if you stay swaddled in your blankets. didn't ya know that, shortie?"

your fever-stricken mind didn't until now, but you decide not to voice the fact out loud, just to not appease the smug grin on that bastard's face.

instead, you retort, "but don't you know staying in close contact with a sick person, taking no preacutions, can make you fall ill too?"

"nah!" gojo shoves your concern away with a dismissive shake of his head, "i'm not one of the strongest duo for nothing, you know? them weakass flu viruses can do nothing to me."

then adds, swiping a calloused palm over the skin of your forehead— cracking a smile, you realize, is 'cause he finds it sweating, "moreover, you're sick, shortie— you don't think i'm gonna leave you to take care of yourself, all alone with no one to help, do you?"

you don't.

of course, you don't, knowing who your dearest friend is— a very very stubborn boy, a store of immense power, but most importantly— the holder of a heart made from the purest of pure gold...

a half-hearted ugh is the only response you decide to grace his query with, not really minding when the boy ruffles your hair and pulling the thinnest of the blankets over you both, shifts so that he is now on his side with an arm tucked under his head, while you remain squished in between him and the sofa, face nearly pressing into his shirt-covered chest.

allowing a beat to pass, you peer up at him, mumbling tiredly.

"but why are you sleeping with me here, 'toru? go to one of the rooms and sleep in them. your legs will hurt a lot tomorrow, if you keep them dangling like that."

"let them," gojo smiles, wrapping a loose arm round your midsection, "it's more important for me to stay close to you to know when you're feeling sick and when you're not- or do you wanna make me sleep on the floor? i can do that for you."

"i am not saying this for me, 'toru," you grumble, inching closer to him despite your brain barking opposite instructions at you, "it's for you– i move a lot when i'm asleep. you won't get even a wink of sleep."

your best friend's lips lift knowingly. "why do you think i trapped you like this, hm?"

your zeal to dissuade him, itself fades a little. still, you persist, "i also tend to mumble in my sleep. won't you find that creepy?"

"nothing's creepy if it's in your sweet voice," he answers with a very... uncanny smile then rushes to add with a visibly exhausted sigh when you shoot him a frown, "i've got earplugs in my bag. i'll use them if it's too unbearable for me."

"tch!"

the battle of talking him out of this seemingly- definitely lost, you tsk and move to shut your eyes, finally letting your ailing body to listen to the call of sleep— before your eyes fly open again— a brand new idea whirring to life in your mind.

"but what if i start sneezing, or worse, coughing in the middle of the night? what are you go—"

"shut up," gojo shushes you, pressing your face into his shirt by a firm hold on the back of your head. you make a yelp of protest but it goes ignored by him as he continues, voice dropping to a pleasant rumble.

"and in case you start sneezing or coughing, i'm gonna wake up and take care of you and will stay awake till you're perfectly okay and fine— is that clear to you, shortie? taking care of you is only why i'm here tonight— why else would i bother myself with a snot-nosed person?"

his remark makes your fingers want to pinch his sides hard– but you stop them— choosing to let them draw nonsensical designs over his back, instead. a barely-there shiver passes through his body, you feel it, the same moment he removes his hand from the back of your hair to keep it in between your shoulder blades, lightly pressing, loosening the knots there.

yawning a little, you nuzzle into him at the comfort his action gives, then blink a pair of bleary eyes up at him, "do you know how much i adore you?"

curiosity and delight dimple his cheeks in a smile, clear as day for you to see. he asks, "you do?"

"mmhm," you don't waste even an instant in humming your assent, the relief brought by the medicines and gojo making you slowly fall into the grasp of slumber, "i really do. you're very very very precious to me and i adore you so much, 'toru. you're the best."

"i'm very happy to know that," the boy murmurs in a tone way too soft for him, but your slowly ebbing consciouness doesn't let you dwell on it for long— a smile shaping your lips at his next words, "and i too love you very much. i lo-"

he stops abruptly, making you frown up at him, worried— only to find him wearing a bright grin on his face. something tells you he is hiding something— his eyes are too nervous for a bragging person as him...

deciding not to pay it any attention, you pucker your lips into a pout.

"heyyy," you whine, "finish your sentence, 'toru!!! you can't leave your darling best friend hanging like thattt!!!"

the tension in his facial muscles reduces a pinch at your demand. the boy's grin widens, glowing even brighter to your tired eyes than those led-like blue eyes of his in the dim lights of the room.

thumbing your cheek lightly, he gives into your urging. "okay, fine— i love my darling shortie the most in this world. so much so that there is no one in this world who can love you as much as i do," he says in a gentle whisper, then adds— face growing that same strange smile as before— "my beloved best friend... now does that make you happy?"

the abrupt change in his tone to an oddly cheery quality as he makes his query is more than enough to give you one hell of a whiplash. you quickly sidestep it– filing the many queries it brings, away to be dealt with on a healthier day.

a brief shiver sending you press yourself closer into his comforting self, you close your eyes and mumble into the fabric of his shirt, "it makes me the happiest... thank you, 'toru. i too love you the most."

a tiny beat passes before you feel a feather-light kiss landing on your hairline— and that's the last thing you notice, before your drowsiness finally claims you, lulling you to a restful sleep in the safe embrace of your dearest 'toru.

▸ IMPORTANT NOTE: whatever u do, pls don't be as dumb as 'toru or shortie here!! if u r the one suffering from a flu or if u r the one taking care of a person who has flu, pls take the required precautions, and take care of urself and the ppl around u! love u sm!

[as a med student, it literally pained me to write these two being so stupid & careless when dealing with an illness as infectious and irritating like flu... but oh well. anything is possible in fiction, right? 🙃]

▸ masterlist

[justchillandshipit]

Here I go again.

Buck asks Eddie if his son is the real reason he doesn't date. Eddie responds with, "That and, they weren't my type."

This has been a flag for everyone who reads the subtext, but let's take a moment to look at the last GIF.

Eddie says they weren't his type. Buck turns around to look at them and probably assesses what makes them, 'not' Eddie's type because the girls were all subjectively pretty. There were also a variety of types of women there.

But look closely at the GIF. Eddie said they weren't his type. While Buck is glancing back, Eddie gives Buck a quick look that really screams, "You are it. You are the type." When I noticed this from the GIF edit, I thought it might be the creator slowing it down, but nope. If I look at the episode, it is the same or nearly the same. This is early season two, and I have always thought, in the early episodes, there was no intent to pair Eddie with Buck as anything but a friend. However, this scene makes me wonder at what point Tim M or whoever was writing changed their minds about adding in a subtextual narrative.

I find it very difficult to see this scene as a heteronormative exchange. In fact, it even feels like Eddie is pushing back a little to test where Buck stands. Buck as a character who lacks self-awareness gives a mixed signal answer. (which tracks with his character at this point and matches his coming-out arc.) **edited to clarify** Buck's mixed signal response to Eddie saying they aren't my type is, "Not mine either, at least not anymore."**

A few seconds later, Buck says Eddie has a weak excuse. My lovely and wonderfully sassy Eddie says, "You live in your invisible girlfriend's house, and you're telling me about weak excuses." He essentially points at Buck's closet door, but of course, this is something that Buck couldn't see or pick up on at the time. These moments are small in the grand scheme of the show as a whole so I'm afraid it will be forgotten. It would be nice to have some sort of throwback acknowledgment that this scene hasn't been retconned.

To backtrack a little bit here, I would also like to point out something else about the early timing or the writing of these characters as potentially queer. They are outside. (True I don't understand the ins and outs of filmmaking so there may very well be a reason for this.) But the shot itself is making them walk close together. Not just close, their shoulders are literally bumping against each other, hitting and knocking at each other in a way that might appear "unintentionally" intimate--until you remember they are outside. It seems to me like there are dozens of ways to shoot this thing that don't require them to be so casually physical with each other. For the scene to be shot like this and then consider the canon conversation that took place, it feels quite intentional that the writers wanted viewers to look closely for something else.

Whenever certain people call Buddie shippers delusional, I think about this. Subtextual language aside, the scenes are shot in such a way as to plant the idea of "More." There is attraction here. There is flirting.

Someone, somewhere wanted to tell this story from the start; and I'm not mad about it. I'm 100% here for it, and I'm ready for it to go down as the most epic love story I've ever watched or read about, but I also admit that I want it to be canon, not so I can throw it in anyone's face that their ship is wrong, but so I can prove I'm not some weirdo putting two hot guys together. I'm seeing a real romance being built. I want that validation as much as I want everyone under the LGBTQ umbrella to see representation for themselves on screen.

If you want to see the scene, go to about 3:05.

[termitnik]

what are some common misconceptions about pathologic characters that ur sick of seeing in fandom spaces

anon thank you for blessing me with this wonderful ask this fine day

i'm gonna keep it pretty short for daniil because i don't want this to become a defense post about him and i think i've already said all there is to say but literally can we stop mischaracterizing him to this degree? it's very obvious that daniil does care about the town and the people around him given that he keeps trying to help in any way he can even when he has nothing to personally gain by doing so. and unless you're going for all the 'i'm an asshole' options in his dialogue he's actually polite and even endearing at certain points? especially that considering that during his own route he's pretty much thugging it out on his own, if anything helping the other two playable characters instead of the other way round, but in the haruspex and chageling route he's the one you turn to for help when stuff gets tough. here's a post that includes some of his lines that illustrate this point. also the implication that he's some clueless asshole that doesn't know what he's doing while artemy is The Good Doctor That Saves Everyone TM is a horrible misreading of the story and the framing of the plot. the bachelor's route is specifically a story about a person who finds themselves in such a hostile setting that, despite their best efforts, is unable to find their footing and ultimately fails at everything they try to accomplish. by interpreting this aspect of the game as daniil himself being incompetent you have missed out one of the most major points this game is trying to make.

as for artemy, i partly blame this on the developers themselves and how they handled his p2 characterisation but i dont like how the grittier aspects of his character are ignored in favor of a loving father persona. artemy can be a huge dick in classic, as can all three playable characters and a big part of why i like his and daniils relationship so much is because they're both these cold, reserved, introverted guys but allow themselves to enjoy an easier dynamic between them. i think that aspect of their relationship doesn't really work if you hc artemy as someone who is kind and cheerful from the get go.

in a similar vein i also don't like how perceptions of clara often boil down to silly teenage girl who makes meta jokes when her character is so much more than that. people completely ignore the unflattering aspects of her character, like how self-righteous she really is. i mean she's literally making it up as she goes and yet she feels so confident in herself and her methods that she finds it acceptable to trick the only two doctors into a rivalry (and then sell them out to each other for supplies despite fully believing that they intend to kill each other). also, most of the time she is not as silly and impish as people make her out to be- that's mostly the changeling. in the moments when she is herself, clara is pretty depressed.

i also dont like anna angel slander because, is she a child murderer? yeah. was she also abducted as a child herself and found herself in an extremely difficult position at a very early age? also yeah. iirc correctly shes 18 in the game and the ace of diamonds events happened years prior so basically she was a child herself. not that its wrong to criticize child murder because obviously but the way some people speak about her is insane.

also this is completely hc based and of lesser importance than everything else but i have difficulty getting behind anything remotely kinky when it comes to burakhosky because to me they will always be the kind of couple that read in silence next to each other before falling asleep at the late hour of 10:30 pm.

[cosmicjoke]

Okay, I've got one more bone to pick about the way people mischaracterize Levi's refusal to tell Jean that killing is right as Levi actually making some sort of moral statement and expressing his belief that killing is wrong. I really do wonder how people come up with this stuff.

Levi saying he doesn't know whether Jean choosing not to kill is right or wrong isn't the same as him saying he thinks killing is wrong. It’s Levi allowing Jean to decide that for himself, based on his own, personal beliefs and the objective reality of the situation, while acknowledging that for himself, Levi is able and willing to kill dependent on the circumstances. It's Levi NOT making a moral judgment on killing, or trying to convince anyone else of the moral rightness or wrongness of killing, and to try and frame it as such is pure projection. It's projecting ones own moral beliefs onto Levi and trying to twist his refusal to moralize this issue as some sort of proof that he's morally against it.

Again, though, for Levi it's not even a moral question. It's a question of objective reality. He doesn't try to justify killing to himself through some moral framework, nor does he condemn himself or others for killing in and of itself. Again, it's not about morality to Levi. It's just about objective reality. As in, if I don't do this, then this other thing will happen, and I have to decide which choice sits most right with me, which course I feel is correct in the moment. Either I let myself and my comrades get killed to uphold some static, black and white moral standard and worldview, or I kill the people trying to kill us and save lives in the process. Again, it's not a question of morality, it's a question of practical, objective reality. It’s about objectively acknowledging action and consequence and then weighing, based on that, which choice you feel is best. Where the morality comes in is in which of those options you believe most aligns with your own personal sense of right and wrong.

Also, this repeated claim that Levi is morally grey is wrong, because again, Levi's entire philosophy of no regrets is based on moral conviction. Do what you FEEL is right in the specific situation you're in, whether the outcome proves it to have been the right choice or not, and that way you'll have no regrets, because you'll have not compromised your moral values. I've said it before that Levi is the most morally consistent character in the series. He never compromises his moral values, something perfectly demonstrated in his choice during the RtS arc. When he does something quote on quote "bad", like killing or committing acts of violence, it's because he believes it's the best course of action in any, given scenario.

What people just don't get about Levi is that his moral values aren't static and don't adhere to one, single school of thought, i.e. "killing is always wrong". Levi's morality is fluid depending on the situation. That doesn't mean he has no moral conviction, it means he understands that morality itself is a complex and multi-faceted concept that isn't easily defined or pinned down.

And he doesn't try to force his way of thinking onto anyone else, as demonstrated, again, during the Uprising arc and his exchange with Jean and Armin. People seem to take that to mean that Levi is making some sort of statement as to the wrongness inherent in the act of killing. But again, it's got nothing to do with how he views killing morally, it has to do with Levi respecting the agency of others and allowing them to choose for themselves what they think is right and wrong, or what they think is best. Levi clearly doesn't view killing as "wrong no matter what" or he wouldn't do it. There would never be a circumstance, then, in which he felt killing was the best course. There would be no situation in which he chose to kill, or in which he didn't regret killing. Just because Levi doesn’t deign to tell Jean that he was wrong for not killing doesn’t mean Levi himself views killing in and of itself as wrong.

Again, it’s just him respecting Jean’s agency and acknowledging that he himself doesn’t know for certain what the right and wrong choice is. That doesn't mean there aren't circumstances in which he views killing as wrong though, either. He clearly does view killing in certain circumstances as wrong, just like he views it as right, again, depending on the circumstances, like what Zeke did to the people in Ragako village, etc… Killing innocent people who pose no threat to you is clearly wrong in Levi's eyes. See his disgust at Zeke, or at Kenny for killing members of his squad. Obviously Levi has his own moral standards. He’s just not a big enough dick to try and tell others that his personal beliefs should also be theirs. He’s not so arrogant or egotistical as to try and impose his personal beliefs and feelings on anyone else. That’s why he says he “doesn’t know” what’s right or wrong. Because he doesn’t. Nobody does. He can only go by what he personally feels and dictate his own actions by that. What everyone else does is up to them. He can form personal opinions about their actions, but he doesn’t try to tell anyone one way or another what they should do, again, because he actually respects other people and their choices.

Honestly, so many of these bad takes come down to people's inability to view anything free from the constraints of their shipping goggles. They always approach their understanding of Levi's character from the premise that their ship is canon and work backward from there. In particular, you see these takes coming from the eruri fandom, where some people in that community want to believe that Levi has compromised his moral belief that killing is wrong because he just looooves Erwin so much and is willing to sacrifice everything for his beautiful blonde hunk, lol. So they have to re-frame Levi's refusal to make a moral judgment to others on the act of killing as him actually making a moral judgement on the act of killing. That way, they can then claim that Levi sacrifices his moral values for Erwin because he just loves him so, so much, instead of approaching it from an objective viewpoint, which would then lead them to the obvious conclusion that Levi follows Erwin's orders and is willing to kill people because those actions, dependent on the circumstances, fall in line with what he personally values morally, i.e. doing what's best for humanity, i.e. saving the lives of the people he's directly responsible for.

Those are actions taken and guided by Levi's morality. It's why he's so upset when he learns that Erwin's main goal isn't to secure humanity's victory, but to discover what's in Eren's basement, because it throws into question whether Levi's been making the right moral choice all these years in following Erwin's orders. Levi chose to follow Erwin because he believed Erwin's own intentions were pure and it would allow Levi to help people in the most effective way possible.

Just to lay out further why saying Levi thinks killing is wrong is a ridiculous take, I want to reiterate that it's not about Levi choosing what he thinks or knows is "right" in the moment, it's about Levi following his heart. Following ones personal, moral beliefs won't always lead to the "right" outcome.

Levi doesn't know if ANYTHING is the "right" answer, and that's what his entire philosophy is predicated on. Not knowing whether his actions will lead to a desirable or good outcome, being able to accept that he doesn't know what the outcome will be, but not allowing that uncertainty to instill doubt or hesitation in him and his choices.

He follows what he FEELS in his heart is right, but he won't and can't give a definitive answer about whether it absolutely is or not. The way Levi is able to live with no regrets, as he says, is because, regardless of the outcome, whether good or bad, he knows he did what his heart told him to do in the moment. And yes, that includes killing in certain situations.

It has to do with practical reality. If your life is being threatened, and you know, if you don't take the practical action of killing the person threatening you first, it means your life or the lives of others will with certainty end, then you are absolutely, 100% justified in killing that person.

I've said this a million times already, but there's a very GOOD reason there's a distinction made between "murder" and "justifiable homicide" within the actual law. Like I said before, to criticize Levi for failing to be a pacifist, when his pacifism would have led to him and others being killed, is the definition of cruelty and ignorance and exposes those giving the criticism as having led breathtakingly pampered and privileged lives.

Isayama's story isn't meant to lead the reader toward condemnation of the characters for engaging in acts of violence and killing, or to make you think of them as "bad people" for doing these things. It wants to lead the reader toward understanding that it's the circumstances that force one into a position of having to kill to protect themselves and others that should be condemned.

Killing is "bad", yes, but that doesn't mean a person who kills is bad themselves, or morally wrong. Circumstances like war, like prejudice and persecution, like social ostracization and disenfranchisement are the real villains of AoT. It's why very few, if any, of the characters in AoT are framed as purely villainous. We aren't meant to think of any of them as "bad guys", per say, we're meant to think of the circumstances that led them down a specific path as bad. That's not to say there aren't bad people in AoT. There very much are. People that kill for pleasure, people that revel in violence and in hurting others. People that use their circumstances in life as an excuse to hurt others without there being a practical or understandable reason for it. Just like there are good people in AoT, too. People who, despite their circumstances in life, still extend great compassion and kindness and love to others. And yes, Levi is one of those good people.

These people also try to take Armin's statement that they're all "bad people" now as the narrative somehow trying to tell the audience the same, while never acknowledging that Armin's statement here is taken out of context, without regard to Armin's own bias against himself.

Isayama doesn't say Armin and the others are "bad people" for killing, he simply says they're troubled by having killed because there's this idea conditioned into them from the lives they've led that killing is wrong, no matter the circumstances. Whether one believes that or not though comes down to individual perception and moral belief, which in itself proves that morality isn't a static concept, but rather one that operates on a sliding scale, determined upon ones individual and personal views. Views which can be influenced, of course, by ones environment and societal norms and pressures. It isn't a definitive statement as to ones moral worth as a person, as to their morality or immorality, or a declaration on whether any of these characters are good or bad.

I could just as easily argue, and I have, that it's worse and more morally ambiguous to refuse to kill to uphold ones own sense of moral righteousness if that refusal leads to other people being killed. That kind of rigid moral standard shows a refusal to understand that morality is a complex concept with no, clear definition and could easily be seen as prioritizing ones individual sense of self-righteousness above the lives of people. It's why Armin later refuses to sit out the fight at the docks, despite Reiner's offer for him and the others to do so, because he refuses to put his own sense of moral comfort above what he feels is the right and necessary course of action. Armin's perception of their situation and of himself morally isn't 100% objective on any level. Yes, Armin feels he's a bad person for having killed, but that doesn't mean it's objectively true. Seeing killing as wrong, no matter the reason, is a dangerous and entirely unrealistic and impossible standard to live up to.

One more point. Levi is very firmly "morally good" based on general standards of moral goodness, because every action he takes extends out of a place of kindness and compassion, and as I stated before, he never compromises that morality. His compassion is his defining trait as a character and it dictates his every action.

Once more, it's what Levi's "no regrets" philosophy is predicated on. As long as you make the choice that you genuinely believe is the best course at the time and so long as it's rooted in and coming from a place of genuine compassion and kindness, (which again, Levi's actions always are), then even if the result is horrible, you still won't have any regrets because your decision was made by following what you felt in your heart was right. Not "knowing" what's right, but following what your heart tells you is right, according to your own, personal beliefs. It's about not beating yourself up for things out of your control.

Of course, this is probably what certain people in the fandom mean when they say Levi just does what he wants without concern for the consequences, but that's not what Levi is doing at all. He's simply acknowledging that he can't predict the outcome of anything, no matter how much knowledge he has, or how prepared he is, and so all he can do is make the choice he feels is the best one at the time, depending on the circumstances. Of course Levi would hope that it turns out alright, and that's what making the choice you feel is best is all about. Doing as well as you can and hoping it turns out good, but accepting that if it doesn't, it doesn't reflect on who you are as a person. The way some people frame it though, in typical fashion, is that Levi just does what he wants and doesn't care how it turns out. It's literally the most ungenerous and negative interpretation one could have of a genuinely honorable and wise philosophy.

It's also absurdly disingenuous to claim that Levi doesn't care about the consequences of his actions. He absolutely cares. He cares more than anybody. That’s why you can say, objectively, that Levi is a good person, because he genuinely wants everybody to be okay. He feels genuine compassion and empathy for others and makes every decision he does out of a pure desire to protect people and save lives, or out of a genuine desire to honor those lives or bring comfort. He just knows and accepts that no matter how hard he tries to get it right, no matter what precautions he takes or knowledge he brings to bear on any situation, no matter how sound he feels his judgment is, it could still all turn out wrong, and there's no point in dwelling on that, because all it will lead to, in the end, is a paralyzing fear which helps no one.

[angelshizuka]

Going back to my EOA/HB comparison bullshit for a moment, because I just love these two shows so much, despite being so different (yet similiar).

Just been thinking about Elena and Stolas both being royals who have surived multiple murder attemps thanks to someone or something (in case of the amulet) saving them.

This also ties back to all the times I've talked about the "damsel in distress" trope and how I LOVE characters who can't always save themselves and have these moments of "weakness". It's SO much more than interesting than "perfect" characters who just always magically know how to win every time. And it makes it all the more rewarding when they eventually do manage to win.

Like how Elena eventually got her moment of killing Shuriki in cold blood (in a child friendly way, because this is still a Disney show), because there's only so many times you can threaten someone and their family before they snap and fight you with nothing but pure rage filled adrenaline.

Which makes me wonder what the future for Stolas and his assassination plot line holds.

[spookybad]

Fengqing x Goddess of Death! Reader

Warning!!! Contains death! (it's gentle and unnamed characters, but still, be warned)

I'm pretty sure tgcf doesn't have death gods (I haven't read the books yet, but I know most of the plot) but we'll ignore this fact

I added a name for the goddess, but it's literally just a nickname

The goddess of death was very elusive, many heavenly officials considering her a myth, only few having seen her a select few times.

So, perhaps it was inevitable that somebody would deem it necessary to track the goddess down, for paperwork that was never reported.

And who would be the one assigned such if not Xie Lian himself?

And who would be the tag-along's if not Hua Cheng, Mu Qing and Feng Xin?

In their disguises, of course.

So that's how they ended up making their way to a village that apparently housed a pair of senior-aged soulmates who had reincarnated together to share their love.

On the way they end up meeting a traveler woman, with silver hair and carrying a white cloth bundle in her arms.

"Ah, are you fellow travelers, perhaps?" she'd started with a curious tilt of her head.

"Yes," Xie Lian smiled, "we heard the town just up ahead has wonderful views, so we wanted to visit."

A peculiar, knowing glint entered the woman's eye, "Sure there are!" she leaned in closer, as though telling a secret, "They say, whatever you're looking for can be found in Yang village."

"And you're looking for something." Hua Cheng pointed out amicably.

The woman laughed, "Of course! As are you!"

The rest of their walk to the village was relatively quiet, even Feng Xin and Mu Qing not bickering much.

Instead, the two might be seen whispering among themselves, casting an occasional glance at the traveler woman accompanying them.

Upon reaching the Yang village the silver haired woman turned to them, smiled and bowed, "You'll find what you're looking for." and with that strange glint in her eye, she walked off.

Once alone, the quartet were left in a bout of silence.

"Where might we find the couple, gege?" Hua Cheng turned to Xie Lian with the same smile he always had for his gege.

"Ling Wen gave me their names, so let's just ask around, see if anyone knows."

And that's how they found their way to a regular village home with a yard and some trees.

In the yard of the senior couple, they found a woman with glittery silver hair, draped in a pristine white cloak, with an elegant black scythe held in her hands, sitting on a tree stump, looking into the home of the soulmate couple.

Upon their approach, the silver haired woman smiled, "Ah, it appears you have found what you were looking for, fellow travelers!"

Mu Qing's eyes narrowed, "Are you really the goddess of death?"

The goddess before them smiled in a sly, perhaps infuriating, way, "Perhaps, if you could guess my name~."

"Why do we need to guess your name?" Feng Xin's brows furrowed.

"Because," the goddess's smile seemed a permanent fixture, "you hadn't asked before."

"Most of heaven doesn't know your name." Mu Qing pointed out.

This time Hua Cheng butted in, "Of course they would not."

Mu Qing bristled at this "You-!"

"I think part of it is Yue," Xie Lian interrupted, "Because of your hair."

"The moon." The goddess confirmed, "I'll accept that and ask for no more then."

Yue stood up and walked toward the open door to the home, where they could see the soulmate couple having a mid-day nap, with their door to the yard open to let in the warm summer breeze.

The goddess of death approached the couple and kneeled beside them.

"It's time now, my dears." She said and reached out a gentle hand to brush the wispy hairs out of their faces.

Soon after, the couple's chests stopped moving.

The goddess stepped away from the home, ribbons of silver hair fluttering in the wind, making her look every bit the ethereal being she is.

There was only one thought allowed in that moment.

"Wow."

................

I've had fengqing x Goddess of Death on my mind for quite a while now, I had to write this

The "wow" was Feng Xin, btw

Also, Hua Cheng has met the goddess of death before, so he knew

[struggling-jpg]

2.7 Quest Thoughts

Spoilers Under Cut, it's a long one and is kinda incoherent and definitely doesn't cover everything I would've talked about in proper detail v-v

I felt heavily moved by the themes of this quest. Both Sunday and Tingyun (Fugue) are characters met with a huge shift in their worldview due to near-death experiences (especially on Tingyun's part with death), so I just wanted to word-vomit about it.

Tingyun first since her section in the quest was shorter, but the fact that they brought up the whole thing where she technically never met the Astral Express and how having Phantylia copy her so closely felt tickled the part of my brain that loves when media explores these topics and scenarios. The confusion and heartbreak that comes with having most of your existence taken and used, people experiencing "you" without it actually being you but being so close to you that you can't even find much comfort in the fact that it wasn't you (say that sentence twice ToT). Also how the trauma comes in the form of "Destruction" creating scars in her that won't ever leave, and while she's troubled by it, and will continue to be troubled by it, she chooses to take a step forward and take action, which is really cool for her in long term storytelling! I just hope we get more time with her grappling with these changes while she makes these strides, because of course, as established, those scars won't heal (at least not so easily). I have more thoughts but I don't think I can put them into coherent words at the moment.

Now, onto Sunday, he's always been an interesting figure in this game, especially his place among the player base and fandom. Genuinely, I think he's one of the most easily misread/misunderstood characters in HSR through a matter of media literacy, which is a mix of many things, and a slight failure of Penacony's long-winded writing, but that's a discussion many people have already brought up (plus a very fair criticism). Despite that, I think Sunday's intentions were pretty straightforward in the end, but for the sake of memes or something else, I've noticed that quite a bit of players twist him into something more malicious than he actually was (which tbh, he wasn't malicious at all).

(Part of me wonders if, in terms of players that also play Genshin, stemmed from the comparisons with Wanderer/Scaramouche, which that in itself is a can of worms I might make another post on.)

He's a lot of things. Very empathetic to the plights of those who can't fight for themselves, very meticulous and orderly (to the point disorder makes him feel uneasy), very sacrificial (self-sacrificial specifically, which I think players have confused with him having a "god complex" when it's more of a "savior complex"). Considering his background, he identified and related with the "weak" even if he wasn't fully aware of that before. All these traits that were shaped by his upbringing come to light in this quest.

Learning that Wonweek was a fragment of Sunday was really interesting, and what made things better was how their interactions near the end were handled. It could've been easy to do the merge and have Sunday "change" in ways that would have felt cheap or a speedrun of sorts to "redemption." But the thing about this quest is that this is just the starting point, so having Sunday express dislike for Wonweek, and while admiring certain traits, decide to maintain himself as he is now was great, in my opinion. It gives Sunday things to work towards at his own pace but also doesn't invalidate the intentions he came in with, which is the point Hoyo seems to be taking his journey with. Sunday's perspective wasn't entirely invalid like some players have made it seem to come across, it's just that his approach ended up being extreme/wrong. I appreciate that HSR didn't do a "we're absolutely right, you're completely wrong" approach with Sunday. I think it makes this new chapter in his journey feel more like a first step instead of a one-and-done "redemption quest."

Now we get to directly see Sunday trailblaze, learn, be challenged, grow, and have a potentially satisfying arc that spans over a longer time, which fits HSR's long-term storytelling. I, for one, welcome Sunday onto the Express.

I don't think I've been able to express my thoughts that well, but I wanted to do this while my emotions and memories were still fresh.

On another note, I found myself tearing up at the interactions between Tingyun and Yukong + Sunday and Robin. When you're aware of the contexts and backgrounds of these characters, it just makes the moments hurt more. There's so many things I could say from each conversation but I'm sorely lacking in the elegance to express them all. Different forms of support and parting, it's so bittersweet. (Yukong, my girl, I know you are suffering frfr)

Robin talking about Sunday and saying that he's stronger than most people but as a result, people expect him to get up faster when that isn't the case just got me, especially since he was actually agonizing over things in real time. The siblings make me sad, and I love their love for each other. The whole, we don't have to fly out together because we'll meet up in the sky stuff has me being a mess out in these parts. Maybe in a later post, I'll be able to talk about these parts with better articulation.

But for now, cheers to taking that first step forward!

[duchezss]

I've taken a bit to try and assemble my thoughts of jwct, and frankly I still don't know how to feel. Not in a "oh that was bad" kinda way, but in a "that was life changing how can I move on" kinda way. So I'm gonna do what I do best and just ramble on here, you know me. Spoilers of course.

Overall thoughts:

Holy cow the animation!! Not to say jwcc was ugly, but you can instantly see the budget differences. The lighting was gorgeous and the sequences were great. It was just so clear how much love was poured into every scene, the thought behind every move was so clear.

The story was so engaging and good. I thought I was gonna get tired of the "picking everyone up" trope, but it worked so well. I think the difference is this show knew how to take it's time. Ben and Darius had a few episodes to themselves, then Sammy and Kenji were given time to express their grievances. Hell we didn't even get to Yaz till ep 6 and I loved that. The dinosaurs were great too, and the overall plot was just amazing. I loved how it all slowly enfolded and how it was clear they had only scratched the surface with what they found out.

The voice acting was great as always, but it did kinda make me emotional at first to hear how much Paul had grown up. Getting used to Kenji and Brooklynn's new VA's was kinda odd, especially for Kenji, but by the end I was mostly cool with them.

The characters (and trust I'm gonna talk about all of them individually in a sec) were just superb. Their overall maturity and growth was outstanding, especially seeing how their trauma really effected them all differently. All of their arcs before and throughout the season were simply breathtaking. I think this season might be the best in terms of balance, it handled it's action, humor, and emotional moments so well.

This kinda relates back to the animation, I can't explain it, but they all just felt so much more human this season. Everyone's body language was so fluid and lifelike. They would talk over each other and mumble, they would hunch and roll their eyes and all of this sounds normal, but it really stood out. I think it's safe to say the animators really popped off this season, the direction was so clear this is truly a masterpiece. Also I felt like all of them were so touchy and I loved that so much. Like yes hug, hold hands, grab shoulders, pat on the back, I LOVE.

Characters:

Darius, my god Darius. Of course I've always loved him, he's an amazing mc and he is just so lovable. That being said I generally couldn't get over how much I loved him this season. He blew me away in ways I couldn't have imagined. His grief is so understandable and the way he shifted his ideology on dinosaurs because of Brooklynn was just heartbreaking. The way his character was handled was amazing, and it was wonderful to see that the writers do know how to let the others shine while still showcasing that he is the mc. I was also so in love with how sassy and witty he was, like when did he become so funny? His vulnerable moments were just as good and I loved how they showed his anger and frustration as well. His arc about learning to accept his grief and his regret was so poignant and beautiful. It's clear he needs a shoulder to cry on and yet he still puts everyone first, god I didn't think I could love him this much. He was easily the best character this season, I feel like they FINALLY showcased how amazing he is, just 10/10 no notes they ate.

I was kinda shocked by how goofy Ben was, but man I'd be lying if I said I didn't love it. Still can't get over how tall he is, and while I hated his design at first, it's really grown on me now. I really don't get how a lot of people are saying he felt like a shell of himself, cause frankly this season just cemented him as one of my favorite characters ever. He was kind, caring, understanding, humorous, he cracked jokes and messed around, but also got emotional and real. Him being a conspiracy theorist and living out of a van just makes sense, and the way he's the opposite of his germaphobe self now is hilarious. It was also interesting to see him as the meditator since he was the only one that got along with everyone else. He tried to help Darius with Kenji, he tried to give advice to Yaz about Sammy. It was just so lovely to see him so content and yet still himself? His scenes with Bumpy were so sweet and sad I can't stand them. Also I'm kinda obsessed with the fact that he's so big yet sucks at fighting and defending himself...king. I loved his mini arc about almost regressing on his fear, and how he grew from that. Ben ily light of my life, still the goat I fear.

Sammy's whole story just felt so heartbreaking. When they found her on the farm all alone it hurt me so bad. The way her family was her whole world and now they aren't on speaking terms? I hope the writers explain a bit cause I just can't fathom why? And Yaz moved away and she was really all alone. The way she approached her grief and her whole life in denial, and how she refused to accept anything was so heartbreaking. It hurt even worse because despite all of that pain she was still her. She was headstrong, kind, and passionate, for people and for dinosaurs. I did love how they still showcased her flaws and weaknesses. She had a hard time treating Yaz differently, but she also just wanted someone to actually be there for her. It's so clear she's tired and wants to be the one taken care of for once. Sammy stories feels heart wrenching in perhaps a more subtle way than the others. I really loved the direction the writers took her in this season. They showcased so much good and left us wanted more and ugh someone just give her another hug please.

If there's one thing the writers can be consistent on is making me despise Kenji. He was annoying me at first because of how he was approaching things, but he really grew on me by the end. He was this season’s punching bag and it was so heartbreaking. Brooklynn died and he blamed Darius and it's like he couldn’t escape his anger. It's interesting to see how him and Darius secluded themselves in different ways, and the way he still calls their mom? Oh I'm gonna cry. Yes Kenji is mad and he has every right to be, but it's clear his anger is misplaced. The whole scene with his father was so sad for so many reasons. Yes Kenji didn't like his father, but he literally watched him die. His breakdown was so painful to watch. I like how we can see Kenji kinda mature again over the season. It's as if he's relearning that not everything is in his control, and he shouldn't dwell on that. Sometimes his VA sounded too uninterested or nonchalant, which is a shame because the thing about Kenji is he pretends not to care but it's really the opposite. I am intrigued to see where this show will take his journey.

We took a while to get to Yaz, but I'd say it was worth the wait. I liked how this series didn't shy away from talking about her ptsd, and it took it even a step further by exploring peoples ways of coping. It's also interesting to see how fear has driven Yaz and how that has effected her relationships with all of them, but particularly Sammy. She's trying so hard to do better, but healing isn't linear and building a glass house around yourself can only do so much. I really hope they'll let us see how all of this is effecting her next season, because for someone is deathly afraid of dinosaurs this season put her through the ringer. That being said, I think there's no denying the bravery she showed. No matter how terrified she was she was always there for her friends. When Sammy needed her she knew how to calm her down, when her friends needed her help she let her instincts drive her. She even learned to let herself enjoy the moment, adding humor to trying to make the best of things. I feel for Yaz and I want to see her find comfort in her friends again, because she also just needs a hug.

Character: five stage of grief

While writing this I stopped and realized that in a way all of them really represented the five stages of grief regarding Brooklynn and just their life in general. So I wanted to take an interlude to talk about that for a moment.

Denial: Sammy - It's clear that Sammy has been trying to deny anything and everything, if only to pretend all of her problems are nonexistent. She doesn't want to believe that her family won't talk to her, and that Yaz won't either, and that her friend is just gone. Denying makes it all of it easier and so she makes herself busy so she won't even have a second to think about it all because then maybe she'd have to accept it.

Anger: Kenji - He's blaming everyone, especially Darius for Brooklynn's death. He blames the Allosaurus and he blames his father and through it all his anger never dwindles. Eventually it's all too much and he lets his anger become sadness, but it's clear his frustration and aggravation are not exactly gone. He can forgive but still feel mad at his situation and I think that's ok.

Bargaining: Yaz - Her's almost borderlines on denial like Sammy, but I think it's a little different. Because unlike Sammy she thinks everything is ok. She's convinced herself that this dino free island is fool proof and if she hides away like this nothing bad could ever happen. Obviously she comes to find out this isn't true and she has to accept the fact that her reassuring herself can only do so much. She has to face her fears, and boy does she.

Depression: Darius - From the get go we knew Darius wasn't doing too good. He's locked himself away in his bunker, cut off everyone, and had just become obsessed with catching the Allosaurus. Loosing Brooklynn was hard on all of them, but it's clear he took it the worst. It also didn't help that Kenji blamed him so much, so he fell into this hole. It's not the typical signs of depression, but his behavior is so different than before. Old Darius would have never cut everyone off and reduced dinosaurs to simple killers.

Acceptance: Ben - He's perhaps the only one that can speak so plainly about Brooklynns death. He constantly reassures Darius that it wasn't his fault and he's the one that rallies all of them together. His acceptance of her death is what allows him to put the pieces together that someone is after them. Of course he still mourns her, but the difference is he wants to get her justice and make sure all of them are safe as well.

Relationships:

To get the elephant out of the room THANK GOD brookenji broke up. I know they have a lot of shooters but I have and will never support or understand them. They just didn't work and had like zero chemistry. I really hope they stay broken up please writers I can't take it anymore. That being said I was pleasantly surprised Kenji's whole character wasn't just about Brooklynn. Yes she was a big factor, but without her there it's like he could be his own character again. That was always my biggest gripe with s4-s5 brookenji. I couple should not be reduced to their partners, they need to be their own person too.

Yasammy you will always be famous. The two of them were absolutely wonderful this season. Their fight was so warranted and valid and I loved that both of them were right in some ways. It's never black and white and it's up to communication to resolve those issues. The two of them are just so in love, they are actual soulmates like I can't. No notes, I think their relationship is proof that you can balance a couple and the individual. Sammy has her problems, Yaz has her problems, and together they can be a mess, but that's what so wonderful about it. The scene with them after they got out of the van was generally so beautiful I LOVE THEM.

Darius "I was in love with Brooklynn" Bowman....I USED TO PRAY FOR TIME LIKE THESE?? When I tell you I screamed I mean it so bad, I almost fell out of my chair. I know a lot of people aren't a fan, and they think it reduces their friendship, but I disagree. I think Darius still would've been heartbroken, but this just adds a layer. I also love it cause it's just so messy, and I think that makes it feel more real. What do you do if you love your brothers ex? I have been a dinostar defender for years, and I think there's no deny how much they mean to each other. I know he said Brooklynn didn't replicate his feelings but until we see the scene I'm gonna deny that. I think she rejected him because she didn't want him to get hurt in her investigation, that or she doesn't want to hurt Kenji. Let me just say writers you have a chance to get this all back on track PLEASEEEEE do not mess it up I can't take the heartbreak again.

Ben and Darius' friendship was kinda the best thing ever and I wasn't expecting it at all? I know they've had a rocky relationship before but this was so playful and I loved it so much. The way they goofed around and got into trouble, the show couldn't handle them together all season I guess. I also love how tender it was. Ben was so patient with Darius and it was clear he only wanted the best for him. Darius was just as patient with Ben and he helped him through his little paranoia relapse. They were such a good time and a blast to watch like the amount of times the two of them had me busting out laughing was insane.

Sammy and Ben duo oh how I've missed you. Another one I really didn't expect but they were so lovely. I loved how much they messed around yet they also dropped everything to commit a few crimes. Ep five was full of them and I loved it so much. Also the way Sammy constantly defended Ben was so special to me, that girl knew how to throw a punch lmao. Nothing too crazy, but so welcome and sweet. Also the way Ben was terrorizing Sammy on the phone with Yaz, peak cinema.

MIGHT AS WELL KILL ME NOW KENJI AND DARIUS. WHY are they always fighting Kenji don't make me mad. I loved their relationship so much. The way Kenji was so angry at Darius and yet Darius held him so close while he had a breakdown? Might just kms. They friendship is so rocky and real and I love that. I also love how Kenji wasn't angry when Darius said he had feelings for Brooklynn. He just listened and the maturity they both have is insane. I'm terrified of Brooklynn coming back and causing a love triangle, but honestly I'd be fine if they all just stayed friends if that means these two end up alright. When the brothers brother >>>

Ben and Yaz bestfriendism back everyone cheered. The way they still call each other by their last names actually kinda tears me to pieces. I love how Ben offers advice to Yaz even if it's in his own silly way. They're both so gentle and yet so playful with each other I love. I love that Yaz just let's Ben go on his side quests like yeah he's got it. They didn't get that many scenes but I still love them so dearly anyways.

The return of the king, Sammy and Darius. I know they didn't get that much but they were always one of my fav limited screen time duos. The way they constantly comfort each other just pulls on the heartstrings. Like when they just hugged in the back of the van? And when Sammy raced to hug him again in the warehouse? Ohh I love them. And despite it all Darius trying his best to defend Sammy? Save me older sister-younger brother duo save me.

Kenji got very limited time with Sammy and Yaz and I can't wait to see more cause those just iconic duos, I also would love to see more of Darius and Yaz since they also didn't meet till the very end. I really hope S2 (I'm pretending like it's already confirmed) let's us see more of this, especially Kenji and Yaz please I've missed them so much.

Ohhhhh Ben and Kenji. Benji nation we're kinda so back, living off crumbs is better than living off nothing. Ok but in all seriousness their relationship is so sweet. Ben trying to make Kenji see reason in the beginning, then letting Kenji hold Bumpy's egg cause it was clear that's what he needed at the moment. Then Kenji helping Ben when he got hurt. It's clear they speak in actions, not words. I need more of them like actually I've missed my pookies so bad.

Lastly I wanna talk about Yaz, Sammy, and Ben with Brooklynn. Their flashbacks broke my heart, and it also showcased how different their love and grief for her was. THE FACT THAT WE FINALLY GOT B DUO AND IT'S AFTER SHE'S GONE...my heart shattered. I love how funny and chill they were, we were so robbed of this in jwcc I swear. It's also kinda sad because the implication that Ben introduced Brooklynn to dark jurassic which subsequently lead her down the path that got her "killed"...I'm done. Also the fact that they were so casual implies that Brooklynn would constantly visit him at college which is just so sweet? I can't stand them bye. Sammy casually having Brooklynns old jacket tells me Brooklynn used to come over a lot, perhaps more when they were younger. Also Sammy seemed shocked to go in that room so I might be reading into this too much, but I see it as maybe that was Brooklynns guest room at one point? I am also a firm believer that Sammy dyed her hair pink for Brooklynn. Like Ben, everything just felt so casual and therefore more heart aching. Sammy wants to pretend like she could open that door and Brooklynn would just be there, researching and chilling. I think Yaz's flashback with Brooklynn is the saddest. All these years later and Yaz still confides and trusts Brooklynn to help her through her struggles. It's hard to believe they used to fight so much. Brooklynn is so understanding and kind, and I also find it interesting that it appears that Brooklynn was the one that really kept up with all of them. She wanted to be there for them, and it makes her supposed death that much sadder.

Random things of note:

I have always been a Benjamin denier AND NOW THEY'RE JUST DROPPING THAT OUT OF NO WHERE?? I can't have anything fr. Whatever, I'm still on my Sammy is short for Samantha box sue me.

Bumpy being a mother is so silly goofy but I'm hear for it, just glad she's ok cause if they actually tried to kill her I would've had to intervene.

I really loved the way they let everyone show emotions this season. Like yes of course they showed emotions before, but this felt so much rawer and realer if that makes any sense. Literally all of them cried once throughout the season and I loved that. But not just that, they let them be frustrated, and angry, and happy, and everything in between. KEEP IT UP.

All of the dinosaurs looked amazing, but man the Allosaurus stole the show. Also I loved the white eye, it made us want to view the dinosaur as evil in a way, and I think that was good for putting us in Darius' shoes.

The flashback sequence with Darius and the Allosaurus was so wicked. The team knew how to kill a dramatic moment oh my lord. This is kinda related to the animation too but so many shots were so cinematic. LIKE LIGHTING AND BLOCKING IS BACK PEOPLE. Brooklynn's apartment was gorgeous, Sammy's ranch during the sunset was beautiful. The scene of the explosion behind the T. Rex was iconic. We're so back

I'm so in love with how this show handled grief and not only that, but grief in a group setting. I think this might one of the only pieces of media I've ever seen that really shows how messy found family can be, and that's ok. It's not supposed to perfect, it's only as good as they make it.

Kenji saying dad in Japanese after having that conversation with his father about not being able to speak it, and the implication that he might've learned that word to try and talk with his father? Someone kill me like actually.

Darius wearing yellow agai- [GUNSHOT]

I could go into the color theory with all of their outfits but I won't cause I'm trying to not go that insane (it's not going well)

Ben's fanny back going across his torso, Yaz's iconic bangs.

The fact that Sammy found the map implies that A. Brooklynn came over right before she died and after Darius' confession, and B. That despite everything she still wanted and needed to talk to him about something.

Microbangs lady was actually scary as hell. I really liked her though, she was menacing and interesting. And she clearly valued her relationship with the raptors, I hope we see more of her.

I'm kinda sus of Mateo but I think that's just the trauma of every adult always betraying them. Hope he was chill and we won't see him again pls.

Sammy being such a great fighter is so random but I love it so much?? Like yes let her kick ass in cowboy boots that's my girl.

Where is Darius' necklace? When did he stop wearing it? It is important to the plot or did the animators just find it unnecessary?

Closing thoughts:

Overall WHAT A SHOW!! I had kinda fallen out of love with this show because s4 and s5 were kinda eh. I've never stopped loving the characters though, so this show was like a dream come true. Finally an amazing story to support these amazing characters again.

The character relationships felt at an all time high and I'm so grateful. These characters literally feel like my family too it's kinda bad how much I'm attached. I just love how much they love each other.

The only thing that kinda confused me was the ending. Why did they have to get on the boat right then and there? Why did no one stop the boat before it left? I'm not sure but I'm very excited to find out.

And lastly surprise surprise Brooklynn is alive. Of course I'm happy to know, but I kinda don't like the circumstances. I thought she was gonna be kidnapped or something so there would be a valid reason why she wasn't reaching out. But she's free and is just choosing to hide from the crew, with a good reason I assume. I think this will make her reunion with them more bitter than sweet, but I did just say I love messy so I'm excited anyway.

Y'all my fault I know I have a habit of rambling and making essays but this is just too much fr. Whatever I LOVE TALKING ABOUT WHAT I LOVE LMAO.

[wardensantoineandevka]

I've been wondering this since the premiere last week with starting to get a sense for the kinds of characters here, but after seeing the actual Ship's launch, I continue to have the question: does the Ship.... have a captain? It has a boatswain, which is great and important, but a boatswain isn't a captain.

like, please don't tell me these people are going to, very idealistically and nobly but naively, try to run this crew and this operation��and all its potential dangers and fatal threats—as a completely flat organization. please don't tell me they're going to do the very common and well-intentioned but often ill-advised for this situation "we'll simply defer to whoever's expertise is most relevant." I've seen many a group irl do this, as a person who loves stories about expeditions and voyages I've seen this trope / arc many times. I am holding your hands, all of you, please, I worry about your operating procedure in times of dire urgency and duress. you need an executive officer. you need a captain. you think you don't, but you will. there will come a moment when you will.

frankly, given the broad types we're getting in these episodes and the way the crew moves and the way that many of them seem to orient around him, it may naturally fall to Merlin. it may even do so when the moment is desperate and dangerous. there is possibility others will look to him for direction before he considers it himself. unfortunate for him, if so. (I say "unfortunate" because to find that this falls to you and to be asked to rise to task is always difficult.) if it does come to him, hopefully he finds that he is of level head and steady hand enough to do it well and of stalwart heart enough to bear what the role demands.

but, given what they're setting off to do, they're going to need a captain. if they don't have one, there will come a time that someone will be asked to step up to it. and, taking stock of where things are setting themselves up, I do wonder if Merlin will have to find it in himself to do it.

[anneapocalypse]

I have now found one place Urianger's family is mentioned, Encyclopedia Eorzea vol. 3, and only because the fandom wiki references it:

When he was young, Urianger's parents were deeply engrossed in their research into the occult, leaving Urianger often unattended. His neighbor, Bloewyda Uwilsyngwyn, couldn't bear the sight of the young child being alone, and so offered to raise him in his parents' stead. Urianger's parents thanked Boewyda profusely before leaving for parts unknown, and so it was that Urianger was welcomed into the family of Bloewyda, her husband Wilfsunn, and their daughter Moenbryda.

(Quote is from the wiki, not the book, and it might be a paraphrase, but that's what I've got at the moment.)

And Jesus Christ, this is just... heartbreaking to me. You would think that a pair of scholars would be thrilled to raise a kid like Urianger and share their knowledge with him and encourage him in his own education. The fact that vol. 1 references Moenbryda as helping him enter the Studium always needled me because like? Knowing who Urianger is today and extrapolating backwards, I would have needed exactly zero explanation for why and how he entered the Studium and became an archon. If there's any character who doesn't require an explanation for that, it's Urianger! "Scholar" is his entire character concept. You could tell us he was born an archon and we'd probably half believe it. So Moenbryda being mentioned in that way always seemed Significant, for that reason and for the unspoken question, Where were his parents in this? Did they not care about their kid's education? Like I was on the verge of concluding that his parents were gleaners or laborers or otherwise not scholars themselves, and that's why they were so absent from his life.

But nope. They were apparently just so wrapped up in their own research that they functionally abandoned him with the neighbors. "...before leaving for parts unknown." The fuck. I wonder if he even knows where they are, or if they're completely estranged at this point. I wonder if he's ever angry at them, or if he's just so deeply internalized the idea that there was always something legitimately more important than him and his happiness... which he has maybe carried into his adult worldview in a big way. I can't imagine this not having massive implications for why his self-image is... the way it is. Certainly he had love and care in his childhood thanks to Moenbryda's family, but still... you don't forget something like that.

[hobnob2020]

The Veilguard review

Big spoilers ahead for the people that haven't finished the game yet.

So after plugging 70+ hours I've finally completed Veilguard.

This will just be a general overview of how I felt about the game, I'll likely do a separate one for Solas/Mythal and Lavellan and one for a Lucanis romance.

First off I want to say that any negative criticism I had for the game I am reminded of how difficult this game was to get off the ground running in the first place; it experienced multiple layoffs, it pulled the team to focus on Anthem when it failed, the team was reduced, OG writers left and multiple people lost their jobs once their work was complete and lets not forget those that worked on this during a pandemic so I think it's important to keep coming back to this so that we can just appreciate what we had as an end product.

Now the end product itself, did I enjoy it? absolutely.

I've laughed, I've been giddy, I've been angry at times and in those final moments was reduced to tears that reconciliations were reached and it was the end of a very long 10 year wait.

I want to start from the beginning where we welcomed our Rooks because holy moly is the character creator detailed. I mean seriously every single Rook I've seen is a catwalk model 😂

Every faction felt different and the brief history to your character was really well done; I went with a female mage elf I the Crows and I loved being a Crow from the get go; the decision that she made that essentially forced her to leave the Crows because she'd basically f*cked up a mission was really interesting because there's still that tension once she returned with Viago (who I adored BTW, his disappointing fatherly persona against Teia's comfort and protectiveness was just perfect) and it set the course for every Rook wanting to prove themselves.

Briefly touching on the Inquisitors creation I was so happy that this was an early decision and hearing her say "it's good to see you again" was like a stab to the heart and felt like I was being welcomed back home after such a long journey.

Once into the gameplay it's hard to ignore how beautiful the graphics look, Minrathous' design was so unexpected and how the locals were treated makes me wonder how Dorian ever survived 😂

There were certain scenes that just blew me away and made me realise just how far games have come to allow us them; the moment you open the doors at Weisshaupt and see Ghilan'nains massive looming face in the clouds was just breath taking, in fact the two gods in general were very well done and there wasn't enough of them in my opinion.

The animation as a whole was very good and again compared to Origins this game is on a different level of good (hate to compare it to other games but Balders gate is probably the closest contender).

There's a particular scene with Lucanis as a romance where he walks over to you after you basically say you like what you see and that Spite doesn't define him, the way his face moves, the little smile, the way his eyes drop to your lips when you touch him floored me and I think having motion capture for this game definitely paid off.

The mechanics of the game were fantastic and as I've yet to play anything other than my mage I am excited to play other classes and possibly Warrior for the first time across 4 games, although Spellblade ruined a mage for me as I love being able to be upfront in a battle and found it perfect for my Crow mage.

I went with purple Rook for this playthrough as I wanted a charming Crow who had far too much energy and was awkward in the best way possible and loved every minute of it; Bioware has always been very clever at establishing the different personalities and how they affect the world around them. Going into a scene and having your Rook react by themselves depending on their personality makes the character feel real and that we aren't just following the same thread of dialogue.

When you first meet Solas they didn't lie that it would feel like an end game mission, the dialogue was fantastic, his voice actor is just incredible and he has a talent to be confident, insecure, determined and doubtful of his own words all in one and it was very easy to fall In love with Solas during inquisition.

I really enjoyed how the first decision you make as Rook ends with the gods escaping, either Harding or Neve being injured which puts doubts in your friendship and leadership from the beginning, that Solas who we'd believed to be the big bad was essentially trapped and looked like a kitten compared to these evil beings who want world domination, it really makes the player question how are we going to fix this massive mistake that we've created, because it takes the gods no time to get to work whilst we scramble to find a team and cleanse multiple parts of Thedas at the same time aswell as setting up base in the fade where we dig deep into the history of Solas and the ancient gods past.

The companions of this game I felt were individuals in their own ways with their own back stories and present problems but I felt as a whole weren't as good as say the previous game; there was no double crossing mages or people with their own greed and agendas, no hidden pasts like Blackwall which personally fell abit flat for me.

In fact I'd say the only one who had an interesting story was Lucanis after his imprisonment and demonic possession and the struggles that came with it.

I don't think I'll romance anyone else other than Emmrich as the others just don't interest me.

It just felt like you were constantly flitting to the Lighthouse and back to grind out companion tasks in order to gain approval and faction points, there was no option to just have a conversation like previous games instead it was very much on their terms and where you were in the game which was something i really missed.

Still, their personalities were very different and characters like Lucanis, Taash and especially Emmrich stole my heart very quickly.

The banter was top notch quality as per 👌 some of my favourites were from Taash and Lucanis, just being a Crow in the middle of their conversations about capes was hilarious at times.

The voice acting as a whole was very good, I felt with some characters particularly Neve it felt abit flat in moments but Bioware have a knack for finding talented voices; having someone as bubbly and excited as Bellara to the deadpan and slightly blunt at times Taash made for a very diverse team.

Returning characters was always a welcome and there were some surprising cameos such as Isabella in the Lords of Fortune faction.

I know alot of people were disappointed that this game felt limited in bringing over past choices but it needed to make sense; Sera isn't going to return and be found in the deep roads etc, it needed to serve a purpose to The Veilguards story and I'm happy with the ones we did get.

When it came to the three decisions from inquisition yes I was disappointed at first; why are we ignoring who drank from the well, why aren't we talking about Hawke, who's ruling Fereldon, who's Divine?.

I think we need to remember that after 4 games the decisions from little to big are so vast that there's simply no way to fit it all in and satisfy everyone and baring in mind this game is for new players too.

Having this game set outside of Ferelden means those decisions won't carry weight in Veilguard, who is divine won't affect us, where Hawke is doesn't affect us because we know they'll either be in the fade or fighting against the evil.

And yes a codex could of helped address any of this but again, it's a smaller team now at bioware and the focus is on Rook this time around, it's their turn and tbh reading codex' is time consuming when you've got gods to fight 😂

The only decision I really wanted brought over was who drank from the Well because as a Solasmancer he was so pissed at me but I think I know why it was glossed over.

I think having Solas being able to control your Inquisitor would have the issue of consent and violation and as a romance that doesn't feel right, especially given how Mythal basically manipulated Solas and used him as a slave it just goes into uncomfortable territory.

We could also argue that Solas absorbed Mythals essence so all that's left is her memories and the tiny fragment you find in the crossroads so essentially Mythal ceases to exist thus there's no pledge anymore for the inquisitor and that she only needed her help to fight Corypheus, who knows but I'm glad Solas wasn't able to do that to the Inquisitor.

The endgame was amazing, finally killing Ghilan'nain was so satisfying and Lucanis was an absolute bad ass doing it, seeing Solas become the dreadwolf and hearing his pained cries was heartbreaking even if he couldn't stop betraying my Rook 😂.

Forcing you as a player to lose a character despite high factions and hero status was brutal, and I unfortunately lost both Davrin and Assan. As much as I loved them both, it made sense to his character to die in that way, and Harding has so much more to do for the dwarves and titans.

I'll talk about Solas/Mythal and Lavellan on another post but I was very happy with how it ended, seeing the art concept of him making himself tranquil just shows how differently it could of gone, and I honestly expected them to die in each other's arms.

If I think of anything else I'll add it onto this post but yeah, 10 years man and it's over, well not over completely as I'm creating an Emmrich romance as we speak but I can't believe years of speculation and doubt is now in our hands forever.

Yes this game could of been better in parts and blew my expectations away in others but I loved it and I think the negative criticism over characters like Taash, the three previous decisions, crazy solasmancers which bring the team down is so unjust and people need to reflect on themselves as humans.

All I would say to those that critic this game as heavy as they have is to take their time and play it again, you'll find things you missed the first time around, really read the codex', just sit back and understand what the characters are saying, read between the lines and just take it back to beginning of this post, this game very nearly didn't happen and alot of talented people that have given you this game have lost their jobs so please just be grateful for what we do have and pray that this isn't the end of dragon age.

Edit:

The whole Varric thing was probably my least favourite thing about the game, not because he died but it just didn't make sense that Rook didn't know until the very end.

I had my suspicions because he was always tired and going back to bed and something about it didn't feel right.

For other companions to say "oh we thought you knew" was just silly, I could understand Solas using his powers to create an illusion but why not on all the companions because surely Rook at some point was like "Oh i'll take some food to Varric" or "have you been to visit him", without that Rook just sounds crazy 😂

[baffledandbewildered]

one interesting thing about lifesteal that i dont see talked about enough is the nature of the admin-entities (aka lifestealadmin, lifestealowner, lifesteallord). because like. yeah. they're the alt accounts of the owners. but when you think of it as like - within the roleplay - what are they? are they just - different outfits for the players they represent? are they gods? are they the server itself, given physical form? i could even make an argument that they're some form of manifestation of the viewers - there's so many different ways you could interpret them and its wonderful. yes, they're the arbiters of the rules, at their simplest, but - there's so much potential.

and then you've got their relationship with the players themselves. because, while you can separate them from the players - they're not perfectly inhuman. lifestealadmin was tricked by spoke - lifestealadmin and parrot are the same person, sure, but he masquerades as something different, something other. but he was still tricked. he was still human enough for that.

and then season 5. ohhh how i loved the admins in season 5 - i mean the choice of spoke and ashswag was hilarious in itself, notable world-enders - and then the fact this forced spoke and ash into less destructive roles within the season itself for fear of admin abuse.... but this was the first time i've really been made aware of the distinction between the admin-figure and the player they represent. the admin accounts were "characters" - the elections announcement video made this pretty clear, i think.

but spoke and ashswag did lean into this divide themselves. the 'characters' were still distinctly spoke and ash - i'll always remember this moment in the minutetech impeachment stream.

lifestealowner and lifestealadmin weren't impartial. they both. pretended to be pretty well, i think, but they've both got their moments of trying to incite chaos. which is what spoke and ashswag do, right? and that's what i like about the admin accounts here - if you view them as gods, or manifestations, maybe possession of a sort - they have been changed by their respective players. all powerful, but very painfully human and biased.

and then that was proved very very clearly a few days before the end of the season, when wemmbu killed lifesteallord. i think the impact of that moment was kinda lost amongst the mess of the rest of that stream (mapicc ban, wemmbu ban, lag switch nuke incident....) but hello?? that was insanely cool and i'm so sad it wasn't explored further - wemmbu killed a god. actually awesome.

but yeah. the server ended, and we've got a new season, new admins - i wonder if mapicc and minute have alt accounts that they'll use for admin purposes. i really hope so. i wonder if they'd be willing to commit to the roleplay of prior seasons (doubtful but a girl can dream).

i just love the theming here. gods and mortals, who has power - the placement of power, the meaning of power, it's pretty central to lifesteal and it's so interesting that something like this which, afaik is pretty normal in the smp niche, has so much imaginative potential.

[sciderman]

i feel like.. Every character in your universe, Peter, Wade, Cable, Johnny, MJ, Gwen, fuck even Harry. All of them are “Right People, Wrong Time”. No matter what everyone they meet is the right person at the right time, because all of them are evolving characters who get better and get worse. They are all the right people for their respective partner, but none of them are in the right place. They fall in love with eachother, but the person they fall in love with doesn't even know who they are. They fall for the version of someone who that person despises most about themselves. I don't know if you do it on purpose, but there's a nice analogy you portray using love and time.

oh, bless you anon. if there are two themes in ask-spiderpool, it's love and time. heck, this little number is first on the ask-spiderpool playlist.

peter and wade are kind of always hilariously Not on the Same Page, ever, actually - when it comes to the freaky timescale of love. it's a running gag, really, that peter just has the poorest timing imaginable. he's always, always running late. always last to get the memo.

he decides it's time to fall in love with wade the precise Moment wade is making the active choice to fall OUT of love with him

wade's mad about that

peter decides to spring all this talk of love just as wade's finally finding his own sense of self-worth without all those extra complications messing up his head and peter sticks a wrench in it

i think all of wade and peter's relationship issues really do come down to peter having poor timing. for springing things onto wade long before or after he's ready for them. if he was earlier, it would've been less heartache. if he'd waited longer, maybe it would've been built on sturdier ground.

peter does the right thing at the wrong time. all the time. and he's trying - he's actively trying so hard right now to manage his timing. to not push wade too fast. to be patient.

but also not be too slow.

peter just - can't find the middle ground. and it's driving him crazy. he knows he needs the time to be right. but he doesn't know when the time will be right. the time is never right.

it's kind of the joke now, that peter and wade are kind of bouncing back and forth in time because neither of them are ready. they will be, eventually.

but for now...

it's true - kind of all of their relationships are victim to this - it's funny, i think i've been victim to it a bunch of times in my life, too. where a person might've been the one - might've been everything, but you... you just didn't act in time. you didn't recognise it at the time. things just... didn't work out. schedules didn't align. one small little misstep in the universe. i always wonder about what kind of people could've become important in my life, if i'd done a few things differently. if i'd said the right thing, at the right time.

ultimately, i think everything happens for a reason. and when something's the right time, it is the right time. there's no hypothetical "right time" that you missed the alarm for. if it were the right time, it would've happened. but life's a game about trying your darndest to know when to act, and when to hang-fire. and, well - what happens happens. you win, you lose. but whatever's meant to happen - well, it'll happen.