#but I’ve been scrolling down their hashtag and I love them so much

[betterthanbatman1]

Umm I love them???

[phfenomena]

❝ in a world of boys, he’s a gentleman. ❞ || Luke Hemmings x F!Reader

| A/N- completely self indulgent i love luke hemmings too much

| WARNINGS- slut shaming, wine, ice cream, crying, confessions of love, two idiots in love, threats of violence (joking manner)

luke hemmings x reader fluff

the apartment was dark, barely illuminated by the small lamps scattered around. she was freezing but couldn’t be bothered to turn the air off after the afternoon heat sizzled away. the word just keep echoing inside of her mind. slut. slut. slut. what made her a slut to them? the people who built her career for her, the people she thanks everyday for supporting her?

she couldn’t breathe, having tossed her phone towards the wall in a fit of sadness she didn’t even know how long she’d been laying there. it felt like days but in reality it was probably only a few hours.

all they did was get coffee. he asked her to go get coffee, like friends do. she couldn’t even see the paparazzi, now a hashtag with her name and canceled on the end of it is trending. she hadn’t been with that many guys, has she? she recounted how many men she’d been publicly seen with and she could count it on two hands. if she were a man she’d be praised for her game and her dedication.

maybe she shouldn’t have thrown her phone. she can hear it buzzing and dinging across the room, each notification drilling the word deeper into her head. she’s such a slut! can you believe she’s seeing another guy? #SHESOVERPARTY.

as her legs sloppily and gingerly moved towards her phone she didn’t find thousands of hate messages from her friends like she’d expect. they were there for her. they cared. as she scrolls through the messages, most of them going in one ear and out the other. one stuck out, it’s from luke. she hadn’t been telling what’s going on with her and how she felt. she shakily typed back to him ‘shit i’m so sorry i didn’t answer. just not feeling like going on my phone. thank you for the kind words.’ the bubbles indicating he’s typing appear almost instantly. he’s happy she’s okay, and that she’s texting him. he wants to come over and see how she’s doing. shit. he wants to come over.

she frantically throws her clothes into the closet and tries her best to not look like she’s been wallowing in her self pity for days. even though she has.

as they sit on her couch with wine glasses almost full to the brim, he’s saying how worried everyone was and he feels so horrible that this is happening to her.

“it’s not your fault, luke. i shouldn’t have gone out to coffee with him. i should’ve known better.” she says matter of factly. he turns towards her and furrows his eyebrows.

“no, in no parallel universe would this even be on you. you’re not to blame at all. the internet was so quick to tear you down and call you…that, because they always need a victim. someone to hate on and someone to blame everything on. it’ll never be your fault.” his voice softens towards the end, his free hand rubbing comforting circles over her knee.

the dam collapsed, she fell into a fit of sobs and struggled breaths. placing the wine glass down on the table and putting her head into her hands.

“it just feels so horrible! to have everyone hate you, and call you a slut, a whore, any other insult they can think of!” she’s choking on her own sobs now as he sets his wine glass next to hers and wraps his arms around her. tracing shapes onto her back.

“i’ve never been through this, i can’t imagine how you’re feeling. but i’m your best friend and i’ll do anything in my power to make you feel better. if you want i’ll go out there right now and track down those internet trolls. i can go all james bond on them.” she smiles at his joke but it barley reaches her eyes.

“can we go get ice cream? with full masks on, and every inch of our bodies covered so no one will know it us?” his smile is plastered across his face as he releases her. “i will buy you the entire menu if it’ll make you feel better.” she wipes her tears and stands up.

they’re sitting in his car, windows rolled tightly up. she’s laughing now. she’s laughing at his jokes. he made her laugh. his hands feel like they’re still on fire from when he held her. she was so close, he could feel her heartbeat. her face is lit up by the moon hanging low, almost casting a halo-like effect behind her head. how fitting.

there are traces of their endeavor on her chin, just below her bottom lip. he wipes a napkin across her face trying to rid of the splotch. she laughs and grabs the napkin from his hand

“i’m not a toddler, luke. i can wipe my own face.” she teases while she’s staring into the mirror and wiping her own face. “you’re so pretty” tumbles out of his mouth, barley above a whisper. by the time it traveled to her ears she froze, and went red. her insides felt like they were on fire, in contrast to the temperature outside of the car.

he was quick to apologize before she cut him off. “you’re pretty too. but i’m sure you hear that enough from your fangirls. does it ever creep you out how many people have your face on their bedroom wall? it freaks me out. a picture of me watching them like i’m jesus.” she diffuses the tension whilst also avoiding have a tender moment with him. self-sabotage.

“your fans are normal, though! mine literally figured out where the band was staying and sat outside the hotel for twelve hours.” he exasperated as she laughed. hard.

“they’re just devoted! they’d never call you a slut, even if you slept with the entirety of california.” her eyebrows furrow as she tries to say it seriously, but the idea of him sleeping around the state made her laugh all over again.

“well, i’m one of your fans and i’d never call you a slut. i actually run three different fan accounts for you just to show my pure unbridled devotion to you.” he holds a finger up acting as if he’s telling her a statistic.

“oh my! what a gentleman you are, luke! my reputations never been worse, so you must really like me.” in a world of boys, he’s a gentleman. they feel giddy and high off of eachother presence. as the laughter quiets down and she looks at the radio, she smiles softly seeing ‘you are in love (taylor’s version)’ playing at a low volume.

“you’re my best friend in the whole world, you know that? you’ve always been there and i hope you never leave.” he quietly confesses, his gaze fixed on the moon. desperately avoiding her eye contact.

“you’re my best friend too, luke. i really appreciate everything you did for me tonight. i feel a lot better, thank you.” her hand rests on top of his and a sweet grin settles upon her face.

his hand comes up to cup the side of her face and she leans into it, closing her eyes. “i love you.” he whispers. her eyes slowly open and before he can take it back she meshes their lips together. moving in sync as taylor swift plays softly in the background.

“i love you more, luke.”

[worldofheroes]

A New Approach

tom cruise x girlfriend!reader

summary: during filming, you want to try something that ends up making the cut and becomes the most talked about scene.

warnings: fluff, hint of angst in the beginning if you squint

wc: 680

a/n: based on this request by @rveyjules ! ❤️ hope you enjoy!! My fluffy fics are always so short, hope y’all aren’t too mad! I also couldn’t find a pic/gif I liked so here we are 🫣

Tom and McQ were always in their own world when filming. It was difficult for anyone to break through their thoughts and bring them back to reality.

You were missing your boyfriend. You knew there was work to do, but everything had been so serious for the past week of filming. You were tired of it.

You’d go home at night and Tom was occupied with thoughts of how to film something differently or where the story should go. Most nights, you slept alone in your shared king-sized bed as Tom spent all hours in his office working.

You desperately wanted his attention, and you knew just how to do that.

The upcoming scene between you and Tom was emotional and ended in a tight hug between the two characters. Maybe, just maybe, you could convince Tom and McQ to let you do something different with the scene.

“I wanna try something else for this scene,” you tell Tom and McQ after a take.

“What’s that, sweetheart?” Tom asks you, half paying attention to you.

“I just… wanna try something, okay? If you don’t like it, fine,” you say.

Tom looks at you, mind coming back to the present.

“You wanna try something?”

McQ looks over at Tom.

“If you don’t like it, fine. I just want to do one take, that’s all,” you tell them.

“Let’s do one take,” Tom says.

“Okay,” you beam at the two men.

McQ calls action, and you and Tom go through your dialogue.

When it’s time for the hug, you practically leap at Tom, causing him to stumble backwards a couple steps.

Tom instinctively wraps his arms tighter around you as he recovers from the sudden move.

“Cut!” McQ calls out, holding back laughter.

“That might’ve been a little too much, y/n,” Tom chuckles.

You finally have your boyfriend back, even if it’s just for a moment.

“Sorry,” you giggle. “Just wanted to try something new.”

Tom smiles and kisses the top of your head.

A few months later, you are curled up on the couch flipping through the tv channels as Tom works on post-production for the movie.

You hear the door to your condo open.

“Hey sweetheart,” Tom calls out.

“Baby,” you say, getting off the couch immediately to greet him.

Tom wraps you in a hug. “I’ve missed you.”

“I missed you too,” you mumble into his chest.

“Remember that take we did where you jumped at me?” Tom asks you.

You laugh. “Yeah, I do.”

“We decided to keep it in the film.”

“What?”

“We just loved that take the most, so we kept it.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I’m not,” Tom smiles, kissing you.

“I just did that for fun, nothing serious.”

“The scene needed something like that. It’s gonna go over well with the audience, I promise you.”

You study Tom’s face. “I guess you’ve been producing films longer than I have…”

“You haven’t produced even one,” Tom teases.

“Hey!” you laugh, smacking his chest.

“Just wait, I promise it’ll take well.”

Months after that conversation with Tom, the movie finally released and you were doing a press tour with the cast.

One night in your hotel room, you’re scrolling through social media as Tom finishes getting ready for bed.

As you scroll through the movie’s hashtag, you see the same clip popping up all over the place - the clip of you lunging at Tom.

Every post is saying “if this isn’t how you hug me every day, I don’t want it”.

“Tom,” you say.

“Yes?” he replies.

“People are going crazy over that hug.”

“What did I tell you?”

You smile, setting your phone down and scooting across the bed to watch Tom in the bathroom.

“I know,” you say.

Tom walks out of the bathroom to you. He kisses the top of your head, and taps your legs, wanting you to move.

You scurry into a seated position next to Tom, resting your head on his shoulder.

“I love you,” he tells you.

“I love you too,” you reply, reaching up to give him a kiss.

[blueberry-lemon]

Image Overload

(I was gonna title this post “the tyranny of the image” because it sounds cool but I still don’t 100% get what that phrase means. If only there was a way to look up what things mean…)

I’m not sure if this post is coming from a place of just temporary sadness, or feeling overwhelmed, or if this is how I “really feel”, but I’ll try to put it into words.

I feel like I’ve been overloaded with images.

Art, characters, videos, comics…all the cool stuff that people post, stuff that I’ve been following online for years.

It’s just so much, and I don’t know what to do with it anymore.

I’ve kind of referred to these feelings before.

A year ago, I wrote about my fear that original illustrations, devoid of story or joke or IP recognition, would lose value, because of the fact that it has to compete with the thousands of other images we see on the internet. Basically, the idea that people might lose interest in artwork just for artwork’s sake.

I’ve talked about my own artistic burnout.

And most recently, I’ve talked about being in a time where I might be losing my interest in posting and scrolling online as a way to spend my time.

This time, I want to be careful with what I say. Because I want to be clear that this is only a personal feeling, only a thing going on in my life, and I don’t want to insinuate that it reflects any wider trends in the world or in the wider internet (even though maybe they do correlate, who knows.)

I just feel burnt out…not only on making art but also on looking at art.

I started using Twitter and Tumblr sometime around 2010. In the years since then, as platforms like that became a bigger part of my daily life, I started following more creators. Artists, animators, 3D modelers, cartoonists, streamers, and game developers.

With that, of course, comes the things they post. And the cool things people Share from other creators, who I’m not even following. Years after that came algorithmic timelines, and you know the rest.

In the past year or so, I started feeling this strange new thing: like I’ve reached my limit on being able to enjoy these works and give them the time they deserve.

One part of it is just sensory overload. It might just be me, but I’m losing my tolerance for being able to handle never-ending social media timelines filled with cool stuff. All of the images and videos blur together and make me want to log off and go for a walk.

I’ve been trying to get better about curating my feeds, sometimes using browser extensions to block out stuff. But god forbid I log onto something like Facebook on my phone to check in on people from my high school / college and then get bombarded with an even more ridiculous algorithm firehose.

The worst part is…FB has figured out JUST CLOSE ENOUGH what kind of stuff I’m into. So it hits me with all this fanart of stuff I know, or gag comics that are hashtag relatable, and I do find myself looking at them. But after a few seconds it all starts to feel like slop (and some of it, sadly, actually is AI-generated slop.)

Another part of the feeling is a weird sort of guilt. When I see work from a creator I love…I feel that pressure to Like, Share, and Comment. I know how hard it is to be seen on the internet and I know the courage (and the never-ending hard work) it takes to try to get stuff noticed that you worked really hard on.

When I don’t Like, Share, and Comment…I feel like I’m letting that creator down. I feel guilty, like my reflex to ignore and keep scrolling past their hard work is the exact “problem” with “people these days.” If they’re a freelancer who relies on the internet for their income, I feel even guiltier.

I don’t know what to do with these weird feelings, aside from type up a whine-y blog post about it like this.

Like I said, I feel bad about it. Because so many artists I’ve followed for years (or ones I’ve recently discovered) are consistently putting up fantastic illustrations, or sharing their fun OCs, or putting out awesome comics or personal stories and I don’t feel like I can give that work the time that it 100% deserves. I DO want to Like, Share, and Comment on every single thing. I want to give it attention, take my time with it, and show the artist that I enjoyed it and admire the work they put into it.

But it’s just all too much to keep up with.

At worst, now when I see doodles and characters that used to bring me joy…I feel almost nothing. Which probably says more about me than it says about the art.

As another wave of people migrate from Twitter over to Bluesky and other platforms, I think I might have to be even more mindful about curating my feeds. It’s not worth feeling this conflicted feeling every time I log on: things that remind me of my own burnout as an artist and remind me of how hard it is to make a living online. It’d be better for me to just trim down how much I come across, so that I can take the time to appreciate each piece of artwork at its own pace.

For what it’s worth, I don’t get this overloaded feeling about text. I’m not sure what that says about me. If I see a bunch of text I don’t feel like reading, I just skim it or skip it, and I don’t feel as much guilt that I didn’t give it the time it deserves. Maybe it’s because text kind of inherently culls out uninterested people and we all kind of accept this. You’re not going to “consume” all the text unless you’re genuinely interested, while with images you can kind of consume them in passing.

There’s something about the image itself as a package that just seems like it can’t find room in my head right now. Like I’m a Tetris screen that’s one block away from topping out.

Maybe I’m just getting older, lol. Or maybe I need to accept that scrolling the internet for art like this doesn’t give me the same amount of joy that it used to, especially if I have the bias of feeling personally burnt out.

[rxscss]

𝕥𝕒𝕤𝕜 𝟘𝟘𝟙. - 𝕛𝕠𝕙𝕟𝕟𝕪 𝕜𝕖𝕟𝕟𝕖𝕕𝕪

he was born to be in front of the cameras. it’s all he knew, after all. so when vogue came knocking, wanting him to be their next feature in their 73 questions series, he happily obliged. a chance to talk about himself and how great he was was an opportunity he’d never turn down. they told him to act casual, to simply be himself, which was why he was stood answering the door in his best suit and a signature grin on his face. “come on in vogue, i don’t bite...unless that’s what you’re into.” he said, flashing a wink towards the camera before stepping into his home, lounging across his couch as they began to ask the questions.

On a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now?

“i would have to say a nice, solid eleven.” he said, giving the camera a wide grin. “i mean, we’re filming our 20th season of kicking it with the kennedy’s, i’m the face of male gucci for the forth consecutive year and i look like this.” he said, motioning to himself. “there’s really not much for me to not be excited about, you know?”

Describe yourself in a hashtag?

“#godsgifttomankind.” he answered simply with a proud smirk, ignoring the eye rolls from behind the camera.  

If you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be?

pursing his lips, he pulled out his phone and opened the notes app, opening his notes section that was titled ‘people i wanna bang but haven’t banged, but one day will bang’ list. “let me see...” he said, scrolling through the list with pursed lips. “angelina jolie, beyonce, mila kunis, blake lively, halle berry, rihanna, shakira and taylor swift - just so she can write a song about how good i am afterwards.” he said, causing the camera man to let out a heavy sigh. “you do know we meant a love scene in a movie and not like...actually, right?” the camera man to johnny. “yeah...a love scene...like porn.” johnny said, causing the entire camera crew to face palm and continue with the inteview.

If your life was a musical, what would the marquee say?

“johnny, the beautiful.”  he said, motioning his hands in the air as if it were waving towards the marquee. “my life would be a great musical, you know. i make girls sing all the time.”

What’s one thing people don’t know about you?

“there’s not a lot people don’t know about me, i’ve been on reality tv since i was eight.” he said with a shrug. “but i do have some things i’m planning...not like really, but like in my brain i do.” he said, pointing to his head.”

What’s your wakeup ritual?

“open my eyes, smoke a fat j, look in the mirror and thank god for giving me this face and not an ugly one.”

What’s your go to bed ritual?

“get in bed and make sure the side of it is kept warm.”

What’s your favorite time of day?

“the time of day when you guys get more creative with your questions. you know, i really liked that one where you asked about the porn stuff.” johnny said with a huff, causing the camera man to let out another groan of annoyance, asking him to just answer the question. “midnight.” he answered with a huff. “i should’ve just done mtv cribs.”

Dream country to visit?

“i’ve been to basically all of them already. except like..antartica, is that a country? i don’t wanna go there anyway, it’s cold as shit.”

What’s the biggest surprise you’ve had?

“being cut from my thirty second scene from my brother-in-law killian’s movie.” he said with a roll of his eyes. “no wonder why it didn’t win a fucking oscar, forgive, but never, ever forget.” 

Comfy shoes or dress shoes?

he couldn’t help but roll his eyes at this one. “um, pan down please.” he said, pointing to his gucci loafers. “i think the answer is obvious.”

Vintage or new?

“vintage cars and booze. new everything else.”

Who do you want to write your obituary?

“leonardo dicaprio.” he said with a nod, prompting the camera man to ask if they knew each other. “that wasn’t a part of the question, now was it?” he said with a roll of his eyes, arms folding across his chest. “my answer remains. leonardo dicaprio.”

Style icon?

“myself.”

What are three things you can’t live without?

“money, hunnies and...i don’t know what else rhymes with that to make it sound smooth, so i’ll just say my family...i guess.”

What’s one ingredient you put in everything?

he couldn’t help the low laugh that left his lips. “oh c’mon, you’re making that one far too easy to make dirty. don’t you proof read these before asking them? shit, vogue, get it together.”

What 3 people living or dead would you like to make dinner for?

“make dinner?” he said, eyes widening in shock. “i’m not cooking for anyone, get the hell out of here.”

What’s your biggest fear in life?

“tom ford discontinuing tuscan leather or losing any of the custom items gucci made me in a tragic fire.”

Window or aisle seat?

“i usually just sprawl out on one of the couches in the middle...bold of you to assume i’d ever fly commercial.”

What’s your current TV obsession?

“there’s only one show that’s great enough to keep my attention and that’s kicking it with the kennedy’s, every sunday night at 8pm only on e!” he said, flashing finger guns to the camera, knowing that that answer would make his mother proud.

Favorite app?

“probably instagram. the amount of ass.....assets.” he said, quickly correcting himself. “that people show on there, you know? it’s just...really, really inspiring.”

Secret talent?

“well if i told you it wouldn’t be a secret anymore, now would it?” he said with a wink. however the real answer was that he didn’t have one. because he didn’t have a talented bone in his body.

Most adventurous thing you’ve done in your life?

“it’s a long story...but lets just say it was very illegal and i woke up in the middle of a desert naked...but i wasn’t afraid, i was kinda aroused. good times, good times.”

How would you define yourself in three words?

“only three? sheesh, well, if i had to just pick three i’d say, perfect, awe-inspiring and  impeccable.”

Favorite piece of clothing you own?

“anything from gucci.” he said, continuing to kiss the brand’s ass. they gave him a modeling career, after all. it was the least he could do.

Must have clothing item everyone should have?

“a watch on your wrist that is equivelent to the cost of a downpayment on a house.”

Superpower you would want?

“i would say the superpower i want isn’t really for me, but more for the rest of the world, but i would say super cloning.” he said with a nod, causing a look of confusion from the camera man as he asked him to elaborate. “like there’s 8 billion people in the world, i’ll never be able to bless all of them with my presence, right? so i’d like the ability to clone myself, so everyone could get a little bit of johnny.”

What’s inspiring you in life right now?

“leonardo dicaprio. i mean the way homeboy is shameless about just kicking ‘em to the curb on their twenty fifth birthday...i give my man props for staying true to himself.”

Best piece of advice you’ve received?

“kathy kennedy once said ‘get your fucking ass up and work.’ and by once i mean every damn day of my life. and i guess that’s really all the inspiration you need, right?”

Best advice you’d give your teenage self?

“keep being sexy. and the girls who tell you that it feels the same with a condom on are lying.” he said with a nod, hearing the camera crew mumbling about how they had to cut out half this interview, but choosing to ignore it. not everyone could handle greatness.

A book that everyone should read?

“i’m sure my mom write a biography or something so...that i guess? do i look like someone who has time to fucking read?”

What would you like to be remembered for?

“being the most beautiful thing that’s ever walked this earth...obviously.”

How do you define beauty?

“i mean, no reason to define it with words when you’re literally looking right at it.”

What do you love most about your body?

pursing his lips in thought, as if he were really thinking it over for a few moments, he looked back up at the camera, pointing down at his crotch with a wink.

Best way to take a rest/decompress?

“sex.”

Favorite place to view art?

“www.pornhub.com “

If your life were a song, what would the title be?

“probably the national anthem or something that people have to sing all the fucking time, you know?” he said, the camera man looking at him with a puzzled expression ‘no johnny...we don’t know.’ he said with a huff.

If you could master one instrument, what would it be?

“what are chicks into? guitar? piano? i don’t fuckin’ know man, whatever they like insert that answer here.”

If you had a tattoo, where would it be?

“in the words of kathy kennedy, you don’t put a bumper sticker on a bentley.” he said with a shake of his head, knowing kathy would have his head if he ever even dared to get a tattoo.

What is your favorite animal?

“my favorite car is jaguar so i’m just gonna say that.”

What’s your spirit animal?

“what animals have really big dicks?” he asked the crew behind the camera, causing an eruption of laughter. ‘elephants.’ someone chimed in, causing johnny to furrow his brow. “an elephant? that’s not sexy. what’s sexy? a cheetah? a panther? a lion? sure. let’s go with one of those.”

Best gift you’ve ever received?

“we’re sitting in it.” he said, holding his arms out as he looked around his grand living room. “my twenty first birthday gift from kathy and jonathan, themselves.” he said with a grin. although he knew the lavish house that was literally a minute away from theirs was simply purchased so they could keep an eye on him.

Best gift you’ve ever give?

he pursed his lips in thought and just as he had with a previous question, after a few moments, pointed down to his crotch again.

What’s your favorite board game?

“twister...but like naked twister. there’s no point of playing it with clothes on, you know?”

What’s your favorite color?

“black.”

Least favorite color?

“chartreuse is heinous. should be illegal.”

Where do you feel most at peace?

“probably in the club, vip table, surrounded by bottle service and a bunch of chicks and my buds.”

What’s your favorite thing to do in your time off?

“sex.”

What’s your hair-care routine?

“ask my hair stylist. do you really think i have the time to do this perfect quaff myself? i don’t think so.”

Pilates or yoga?

“i like girls who do those things...the more flexible the better.”

Coffee or tea?

“coffee...spiked. but definitely coffee.”

What’s the weirdest word in the English language?

“no.”

Dark chocolate or milk chocolate?

“dark is usually more expensive right?” he asked the camera crew, who all nodded, looking absolutely exhausted. “sure, then let’s go with dark. i don’t like poverty.” he said, causing all of them to groan in annoyance yet again. “what? i’m anti-poverty! and you’re not? that’s fucked up guys...real fucked up.” he said, shaking his head at them. 

Stairs or elevator?

“elevator. you guys ever have elevator sex? it’s a real good time, let me tell you all about it.” he said with a grin. ‘let’s not.’ said the camera man, causing johnny to pout. “wow, you really suck, huh?”

Summer or winter?

“summer. the less clothes the better.”

You are stuck on an island, you can have only three things with you. What are those things?

“first of all, i’d never be stuck on an island. but if i was, it would be the most lit island. if i could have only three things it would be a big ass house so i could throw sick parties, a plane so i can leave whenever i want and fly in a bunch of babes, and endless booze.”

What are your phobias?

“not being rich, not having a fresh manicure, wrinkled clothes, creased sneakers, granite countertops, mini vans, zits and crying people...all gross.”

A skill you’re working on mastering?

“i’m pretty sure i’m a master of all the skills i’m working on. just ask the women i’ve been with.”

Best thing to happen to you this year?

“my first acting credit in killian’s movie.”

Worst thing to happen to you this year?

“being cut from my first acting credit in killian’s movie.”

Best compliment you’ve ever received?

“all compliments are equal and i love them all the same.” he said, blowing a kiss to the camera. “hey! don’t roll your eyes...that was a nice one, wasn’t it?”

Favorite smell?

“on me? tom ford tuscan leather. on women? baccarat rouge.”

Hugs or kisses?

“kisses...but not mouth ones.” he said, once again pointing to his crotch, causing one of the camera people to throw a pen at his head. “ow! how dare you assault me in my own home!”

If you made a documentary, what would it be about?

“i make a documentary everyday, it’s called kicking it with the kennedy’s, ever heard of it?”

Last piece of content you consumed that made you cry?

“ecstasy. i don’t know what the fuck it was but it was a bad trip man, there were like goblins chasing me and-” he said, being cut off when the team said they meant pieces of entertainment that made him cry. “ohhhhh, well this stripper i met the other night had this sharp ass tongue ring and it did not feel good down south. i didn’t cry, but my eyes definitely teared.” he said, causing another round of sighs and the camera man telling him to start answering a little faster. “fine, keep filtering my truths.” he said with a huff and a pout.

Going out or staying in?

“going out.”

Sweet or savory?

“sweet”

Celebrity crush?

“females. all of them.”

How you know you’re in love?

“dumb question. next.” he said, the camera man saying he had to answer. “you said answer faster, right? next question.” johnny said with a raise of his brow.

Song you can listen to on repeat?

“anything by the weeknd. but his old shit, he’s a pussy now.”

If you could switch lives with someone for a day who would it be?

“switch lives? and leave this gorgeous body? i don’t think so.”

What are you most excited about at this time in your life?

“i’m excited about finishing this interview where my rights have been stripped and i’ve been silenced of my truths.” he said with a snarky grin.

Your go to for having a good laugh?

“my sisters. it’s cute when they try to be mom’s favorite and think that they could even attempt to compare to me.”

Your affirmation for today?

“my affirmation for today...and everyday.” he said, standing up from his seat as he got close to the camera. “is stay sexy.” he said, kissing the lens as they yelled cut. “now get the fuck out of my house.”

[handsomeawkward14r14i]

WARNING : Religion / MentalHealth /Philosophy Skip all Text in ORANGE to avoid .

Been a While since I’ve posted a Blog , it feels like I’m talking to a void yet again. Guess that’s what I get for having to start my channel all over and failing to use Hashtags the “responsible way.”

Welcome to my Tumblr!

I’ve only had it for a year ….and the only thing I ever knew about it before I took the plunge was that Ask Pinkamena came from it and so did allot of early 2000’s EDs ,that it was Chaotic, and that it would be a good mental break from mindless TikTok scrolling That last one , my friend getting it and the start of the end of my High school Senior year led me to making a Lies For the Liars / JTHM/Invader Zim / Momster Energy /Emo themed Tumblr.

Moving Forward from that ; idk what will become of it , It might take a turn for the worse , it might take a turn for the better , or just whatever I end up Hyper fixating on ( which happens to be more religious things at the moment. Contrary to my SpaceHey page Start of April 2024 is probably the best I’ve ever been. Religious or not it’s nice to have something to fall back on when you can’t take on life for yourself. I don’t condone ignorance but worrying about everything and getting nothing done is very different from Trusting in someone you can’t see and seeing answers show up to your problems. So much better than letting them slowly kill you.

If I read that and didn’t have any idea about Christianity or was struggling with sin and or was stuck in the sin cycle constantly hating myself or thinking that God didn’t care enough to help . I’d be confused and I’d think you were one of those lucky people and that something was wrong with me . Or I’d think you were a miserable boring no life brainwashed loco .Or I’d disagree out of religious trama or discrimination against sexuality or gender or just a completely different set of beliefs. All respect! I feel you and I don’t blame you for your opinion I’ve had plenty of doubts over the last two and a half years and experienced slight judgment from the people who claim to “love everyone.”

Anyone who wants to hear let them, anyone who doesn’t it’s perfectly understandable and I hope you love and take care of yourself. <3

so let me break it down. In Christianity you believe a man named Jesus was sent from Heaven to die for your sins ( look up some videos on it I’m not great at explaining.) , Gods only son. He was born by a woman who had never had smex with her husband and once he was older he began to teach people in his Town/City /ect. about his Father and About how to love each other . HE WAS Crucified , Dead , and buried After Jesus died he rose on the third day. April 30th today btw !!!

If you’ve been a Christian for a while and either struggled to do everything right . Or are an older Christian, are filled with the Holy Spirit but feel like you sin too much or aren’t fit for the job . Stop for a moment. Stop that thought process God doesn’t hate you for some stupid Sin you keep doing over and over yes , even if you’ve repented repeatedly . It’s not your job to fix it yourself and it’s tricky to figure out especially when you think you’ve given it to God but your still trying to figure out how your going to dig yourself out of the mess you’ve made. It’s simple, repent , pray , fix your eyes on God( focus simply focus on him , watch videos for all I care on things your curious about that relate to anything in the Bible it doesn’t matter.) and ask him what he wants you to do for the day or how he’s going to fix your problem for you. like your life depends on it. And when the devil starts talking Rebuke and Resist. If you have crystals or idols in your house get rid of them if you have placed power on them . Crystals and statues aren’t inherently bad but can be when you place belief or power on them , if you have Sleep paralysis Anoint your bedroom and or home spiritual attacks are real and they hindered my growth for longer then what i would have liked them to . They also worsened my mental health and made me believe I was the problem , that something in me was off , that i would never be able to do anything or get anything done , that I would never fulfill my potential, that I was stuck , I was too self conscious to take myself seriously, but to pessimistic to not feel self conscious when I wasn’t serious. It was too much of everything and too little of what i needed. Not to mention I craved the pain I craved the uncomfortable feelings because I’d gotten used to them and they were predictable . ( wow , how emo of me .)

Sometimes it’s hard to step away from the past

Sometimes it’s impossible to forget

Sometimes that shit seeps into your everyday life , friendships , relationships , religion. It ruins everything and forces you to be too involved or too detached. Mental health is real and when you’re already struggling like that Demonic Oppression happens a little too often especially when you are open minded , or accidentally or purposely open the door to it . Christians with the Holy Spirit , they see the light in you they’ll do whatever it takes to dim it …and it’s not like some funky little spirit that likes to mess around and see if they can make you feel sad or mad and or trick you into doing drugs . No it’s all meticulously planned …..like a subscription to a Channel…only personalized ….your a walking target , but also a walking embodiment of hope to those who no longer have it .

If you’re beautiful your either preserved, mocked or killed

God is out to protect and provide for you

Satan …well he wants to kill you that doesn’t always mean he can.

The innocent bystanders “ who may be complete jerks.” Are the ones who you need to show love to but remember you can’t love others until trying to love yourself ….until you quit hurting yourself ).

One more word of advice!

Live like you TRULY DIE ! TOMORROW!

the world will end tomorrow or by the end of the week how do you live during that time . Do you become a Nihilist ? Do you remain the same ? Do you enjoy every minute thing , take in every detail , make it a point to talk to the people around you , take a break from the phone and go watch the sunset, hear the crickets or go touch some grass for once ! it’s up to you but enjoying the small things , even the things that are mundane and boring helps tremendously. Granted if you don’t feel a sense of urgency you probably will read this and think nothing . But hypothetically if I could promise you that you would die tomorrow, what would you do . Get closer to God , Break out your favorite CDs to listen to one last time , Go on a walk and reflect , make amends . Spend every day like it’s the end !

If I can I will keep Posting Random Thoughts, Comic Strips , whatever comes to me . but don’t expect my page to loose its “abnormal atracting glisten”….( the fuk ….? I mean..)

Weird Sparkle.

Good to be back! Happy Easter you guys !

[malleux]

PART THREE PART THREE PART THREE

spell [3]. | corpse husband

part one ; part two

-> Pairing: Corpse Husband x Fem!Reader

-> Genre: Fluff

-> Warnings: Anxiety, Self Doubt, Cursing, Hate Comments

-> A/N: here’s the long awaited part three! it’s definitely longer than the last chapters, but genuinely thank you all for 300 followers in literally 4 days lol. also, i wrote this under the small assumption that corpse’s main love language is physical touch!

corpse husband taglist is closed!

You didn’t realize that it was possible to shake so much. You were practically panicking- just from standing in front of an apartment door, ready to knock and meet the man who changed your life.

You’d woken up this morning bright and early. The Facetime call was still on with Corpse and small snores could be heard from his line. You had prayed that he’d gotten at least more than an hour, but doubted it as you hung up and sent a message about when you’d be leaving.

Corpse soon messaged back saying that he was awake as you finally finished packing- you’d stopped last night when he called- so you got in your car and drove the two hours it took to get to San Diego.

So now you stood in front of his apartment, practically trembling. Why you were so anxious, you didn’t know. You’d been talking to him for how long now? And it was never awkward.

But things could easily change when you met him in real life, couldn’t they?

You shook those thoughts out of your head and mustered up enough courage to knock on Corpse’s door, already becoming out of breath from such a simple gesture.

A crash sounded from in the apartment, followed by a small ‘fuck’ that made your heart flip. Soon after, the door opened and you looked up, finally coming eye to eye with him. You couldn’t help the grin that stretched across your face, mirroring his own as he smiled at you as well.

“Hi.” You internally smacked yourself for not saying more, but that’s truly all that could come out of your mouth at the moment.

“Hey. You’re uh- you’re so much prettier in real life.” Corpse responded, looking nearly everywhere but you.

You flushed. “And you’re super attractive, but I already suspected that.”

You could tell he was taken aback by your compliment because he suddenly became even more shy, silently moving out of the doorway and gesturing for you to enter.

“I’m going to film again with everyone in a few minutes, but first I can show you my bedroom so you can make yourself comfortable.” Corpse said after he closed the door. “You can sleep in there and I’ll stay on the couch-“

“Absolutely not.” You interjected, “I’m not kicking you out of your bed.”

“But you’re the guest and I’m not about to let you sleep on my couch.”

“And you’re the owner of this apartment and I’m not going to take over your space like that. I’m sleeping on the couch.”

Corpse groaned and reached his arm out towards you. You thought he was going to just shove your shoulder away for being stubborn, but instead he wrapped his arm completely around your shoulders, pulling you into his side as a hug. You grinned and turned, giving him a full hug and resting your cheek against his chest as his chin laid on your head.

“I’m for real glad you came to visit.” He murmured into your hair, squeezing you a bit tighter before letting go. “Do you wanna stream with me tonight or just chill and watch?”

꧁꧂

“Corpse is streaming Among Us again with Sean, Felix, Rae, Sykkuno, Dave, and Leslie!”

“Where’s Y/N? I miss #CorpseY/N !!”

Twitter was truly your go-to platform when you were bored. You’d been scrolling on it for about thirty minutes now, laying on a small couch that Corpse had in his gaming room.

The man himself was sitting across the room at his desk, talking loudly as he defended himself from being accused as Imposter.

You continued to scroll, feeling a little anxious that somehow Corpse just magically knew that you were looking through your ship tag with him. These were your only worried thoughts until you went past your first… unsavory comment of the day.

“Y/N isn’t playing with them again today. Maybe she finally got the hint that they don’t want her around.”

You rolled your eyes and ignored it, but couldn’t help the rather loud sigh that escaped your lips.

“Hey, guys, I’m going to mute the mic for a second. Everything’s good, don’t worry.” Corpse said into his mic before turning around and facing you. “Is everything okay?”

Turning the phone off and laying it on your chest, you contemplated telling Corpse the truth. He’d just worry about you and you didn’t want that. But he already was worried about you- he’d muted Among Us just to check on you.

“Why are people so mean to others?”

Corpse studied you for a minute before patting his lap. “Come here.”

You quirked an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”

“You're excused. Now come here.”

You stood up and cautiously walked towards the man, who sat before you expectantly. He playfully rolled his eyes and grabbed your wrist, pulling you into his lap sideways. Your back rested against one arm of his gaming chair while your legs draped across the other.

Corpse had one arm reaching around your back, placing his fingers on the keyboard while the other rested on top of your knees, grabbing the computer mouse. You laid your head on Corpse’s shoulder, resting in the crook of his neck.

“It’s in that shipping hashtag, isn’t it? I swear- whoever says that shit about you is dead wrong. Tell me if it gets worse, I’ll put them back in their fucking place. Nobody gets to decide who I’m with or who’s worthy of me.”

You only nodded and closed your eyes, breathing in Corpse’s cologne as he unmuted his mic once more to defend his honor, much like he was ready to defend you.

꧁꧂

Your body ached.

As you had argued your first day with Corpse, you’d been sleeping on his couch for four days now. The first night was okay- his couch was rather comfortable, but it didn’t compare to a bed. Now, your back, shoulders, and neck were killing you.

Every day, 7am would roll around and you would wake up, the soreness preventing you from sleeping in longer.

Usually, you would go into Corpse’s room and talk to him as he messed around on his laptop while sitting in his bed, but today when you entered, he was finally sleeping. It was the first time you’d seen him rest since you’d arrived and you quietly left, not wanting to disturb his much-needed sleep.

You made your way to his small kitchen, pulling out the few groceries that he had in his refrigerator to make breakfast.

Corpse often ate fast foods and takeout, and apologized earlier in the week for not having much to eat. You reassured him that it was okay- that him just letting you visit was enough- and now, you were determined to make it up to him with the best breakfast in bed ever.

You were halfway through making breakfast when the soft thump of feet echoed in the doorway before a chin planted itself on your shoulder.

“Whatcha cookin?” You practically shuddered at Corpse’s morning voice before suddenly gasping and shoving him out of the kitchen.

“No! No!” You pushed him back to his room, “Stay! Go back to bed, now!”

Right as you turned to go back to the kitchen, Corpse caught your wrist and pulled you down onto the bed with him. You practically squealed as you fell, making him laugh.

“Why? What’s going on?” He turned to face you with a teasing smile.

“I was making you breakfast in bed! I was gonna surprise you when you woke up, but you ruined it.” You pouted.

“Aw, poor baby.” His hand reached up and brushed a stray hair out of your face before he traced down your jawline, reaching your chin and using his finger to tilt it up. “I think I’ve got a better surprise, though.”

You quirked an eyebrow, but before you could say anything his lips were on yours. Your heart stopped, but you almost immediately melted into his kiss, bringing your own hand up to cup his cheek while his moved to rest on your waist.

Corpse soon propped himself up on his elbow, never once leaving your lips- just deepening the kiss. He smiled and gave you a few more pecks before finally pulling away and looking at you in adoration.

“Those little hate comments? They’re wrong. If anything, I don’t deserve you. You’ve still got me under a little spell and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Corpse, you deserve the world and I’d be honored to be the one to give it to you.”

“God, you’re perfect for me.”

You couldn’t say anything else. You could only lay beneath him, admiring the man who was now yours. Corpse leaned down again to capture you in another kiss, but you suddenly jerked away before you could lose yourself again.

“Shit, the pancakes!”

┎┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┒

spell taglist: @tanchosanke @paoisabelll @save-the-sky @yukinesekki98 @stephn-prkr @honestlyimstilllivinginthe90s @lustypielita @bi-andready-tocry @coruscaret

corpse taglist: @namjoons-crabssss @lookingforaplacetosleep @teenloves @princess00wifi @pillowjj @nvm-idgaf @creativedogs @wildflowerwhore @chillininahottub-withaghost @whyisquill @holosexualunicorn7000 @ourheavenlyemotions @corbins-kinda-smart @harryhighkey @sokkaspaintings @saturn2000 @a-dot-dev @bean04 @helena-way07 @tooturntashbash @locallolli @simonsbluee @redperson58 @reddeserths @annshit @corpsie-bby @emperor-pizza @vacaprincess @adorably-sweet-hufflepuff @rolls-and-rolex @supernovavision @bestgirlkonan @hughugh20 @theolwebshooter @johnjacobjingleheimerschmidt @shinyyoonie @milybones @propertyofdindjarin @qatiee @sunshineandrainyflowers @dontlookatmeidk @kxsmicsmain @corpsesgirl @witchybarb

┖┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┚

[spiked-tea-writing]

Haha We’re Married

Wilbur Soot x Fem!Reader

Summary: After successfully hiding your relationship for years, twitter fucking comes and exposes you

Pronouns: She/Her 

Warnings: Swearing

Word Count: 1kish

A/n: TBH I’ve only listened to Wilbur’s music, I don’t watch his streams. I just really wanted to write this trope for a streamer. This was kinda self-indulgent *cough* hella self-indulgent *cough*, so sorry if it’s choppy and poorly written. Also I’m trying out headcannon forms. Unedited and unproofed

The situation at hand was very complex

The two of you had been able to keep your relationship under wraps for a very long time.

-Since you were both pretty major streamers on the platform, it was just easier to eep your relationship a secret instead of in the public eye

Y’all were young when you got married had already faced judgment from the surrounding community, and you guys didn’t want to deal with the entire fucking internet questioning your relationship

The decision was made before he joined SootHouse, mainly so that your entire personas wouldn’t be based on being a couple. 

It wasn’t that hard, considering that your internet careers had started separate from each other, but it was increasing in difficulty as your popularity grew and you guys had to interact more, especially on Dream’s sever

Then when Wilbur had started streaming in the apartment, avoiding revealing everything became damn near impossible

Of course, there was speculation, rumors, fanart, and a lot of shipping, but the two of you had never addressed it. 

Fun fact: One fanart of you two was so good it was hung up in your flat, right next to a picture from your wedding lmao. 

Twitter was always breathing down your necks, especially since yall both wore wedding rings, but there was never enough evidence to put two and two together

They were thrown for one hell of a loop after both of you had been on Love or Host

The backlash got so intense to the point where you both made statements about how you both weren’t cheating since the relationships on Love or Host aren’t always real-life partnerships. 

Since you were known for your chill streams one day you were streaming a “painting and inevitably smudging my nails” stream when someone made a donation

It was for eight pounds, and the automatic voice read “when is your birthday, and what is your zodiac??”

You let out a giggle

“Um I’m in September and a Virgo I believe. Actually, funny story, my husband and I share a birthday which makes us both Virgos so I’m actually not sure what that means for our compatibility”

The stream carried on like normal and you didn’t think much of your answer

Then the motherfucking robot voice came for your weave as you were blowing on your fingers

“Are you and Wilbur dating???”

You went beet reed. 

“Haha no, we aren’t. I’m happily married.”

And yet again, the stream went on with any further hiccups. 

After the stream ended, you went to find Wilbur somewhere in the kitchen.

“Hello darling”

His arms wrapped around your waist as you let out a sigh. 

“Stream was very long but at least my nails look nice”

He laughed and started fidgeting with your hands

Your wedding band caught his eye

“I’m glad I tied you down.”

“My husband, the romantic.”

Smiles grace your faces but the sweet moment was interrupted by a phone call coming from your streaming room.

“Ahh fuck, I should get that. Could you call the Thai place for takeaway??”

“Sure thing.”

You made your way down your phone kept ringing

You glanced at the caller id which read Father-In-Law before picking up

“Hey, Phil what’s up?”

“Hey, you need to check Twitter. And get Will.”

The line went dead

You were wondering if that was a advil enduced fever dream when you called for your husband

The sound of shuffling feet against the carpet followed by your lank boiTM walking into your room snapped you into reality

“I was thinking Pad See Ew and-“

“Phil called and told me to check Twitter, and I’m hella scared.”

You could see his face drop. Twitter never meant something good/ Either someone died or someone got canceled for being a perv

“Might as well rip off the bandaid and look.”

You nodded and pulled up Twitter

The number one hashtag on trending was #SootMarriageGate

“What the actual fuck.”

“I’m scared”

With a bit of hesitation, you clicked on the hashtag, which directed you to the top of a thread

“After Y/n’s stream today, I’m thinking that her and Wilbur are actually married. Like it’s no longer a bit”

That tweet had an insane amount of replies, and before you could change your mind, you started scrolling

There were a few arguements, but most of the replies consisted of evidence the audience had found of your relationship.

There were so many clips that either had you mention something about the other person, to that time you walked behind Wilbur’s chair, face just out of the frame of the webcam. 

Unfortunately, people seemed to really be catching on

On reply had caught your eye

“We know Wilburs birthday is September 19, and if you look at Y/ns last birthday post, it was the nineteenth of September. And remember, she and her husband share a birthday. I think that that’s not a coincidence.”

You turned to Wilbur

“Maybe it’s time we just straight up tell them.” 

“You’re right. Should we tweet it?”

“Or maybe stream. Just confirm it and answer a few questions. Is that alright?”

“Of course. Should we do it tonight with the Thai food and make it chill??”

“Sounds like a plan.”

And so you guys waited for a few hours before streaming, during which you guys kept an eye on Twitter and got the food. You built a sort of nest on the floor in the streaming room to eat dinner in and give the stream some cozy vibes. 

After stalling for long enough, twitch got booted up and a stream was started. 

“Hey guys I got Wilbur here with me and we are having a chill stream and eating some Thai.”

The stream was just y’all chatting about the food for a few seconds, ignoring chat until finally Wilbur casually said,

“Oh, and what do you want for our wedding anniversary?”

He turned to look the camera directly in the lens, face deadpan. You let out a giggle before playing along

“Hmm, maybe we should just have a day out as HUSBAND AND WIFE.”

Chat blew up as you both stared at the camera, stone-faced. Wilbur stood up, still emotionless, and ended the stream.  

He turned to you with a smile

“That was easier than expected.”

“Honey the stream was 3 minutes long.”

He disregarded your comment. 

“Well now that that’s out of the way, shall we ignore Twitter for the next day??”

You rolled your eyes at your fantastic husband 

“I couldn’t have had a better idea myself.”

[despressolattes]

Soooo, I was scrolling through Bakugou angst hashtag and I found that SOMEBODY 👀 wanted some requests... So here I am :3 💖💖 I couldn't find rules sooo sorry if I break one, also if it's too much characters, just choose from them 💖 Can I get Bakugou, Hawks and Denki if they cheated? 💖 Some scenarios about them cheating and their s/o finding out and breaking up with them? And make it really sad? 💖💖 Thank you :3 💖 Make sure to drink enough water and get enough rest 💖 Have a great day 💖

CHARACTERS: Katsuki Bakugou x reader

a/n: sorry, i just started watching the show last week and have yet to get to see hawks! i also feel like i haven’t seen enough of kaminari to write about him, so for now, this will just be bakugou! once i see more of those two i’ll write one for them!

WARNINGS: cheating, angst

•─────────°❋❀°─────────•

DON’T GO DESTROYING PEOPLE’S PERSPECTIVES ON LOVE; katsuki bakugou

You had known Katsuki Bakugou for as long as you could remember. The two of you went to the same grade school, and then the same junior high. Despite not being friends with the explosive boy:—quirk and temper wise—at that age, you watched him grow from the sidelines. You watched as Izuku Midoriya went from one of his childhood friends/admirers to someone Bakugou couldn’t stand the sight of.

You watched as his inflated ego burned the dedication of beating anyone and everyone into him.

You watched.

It was when he found out that you were applying to U.A high for the Hero Program that he started to pay attention to you. Your quirk had been the opposite of his: you could manipulate water in any of its three forms.

He paid attention to how you racked up points at the Battle Trials, he paid attention to you when you ended up in Mr. Aisawa’s class together and had to go through the weird first-day of school quirk assessment tests together.

He paid attention.

And watching and paying attention slowly became asking one another to spar together, sparing together turned into talking, talking turned into walking to class together, and walking to class together turned into hanging out at each other’s house’s to do school work.

And THAT turned into the development of feelings. From Kirishima noticing that you two were always together at school and asking Bakugou about it just a tad bit too loud, piquing the interest of your fellow classmates. Mina then wanted to know everything about what was going on, and Ochako insisted that she was there for you if you ever wanted to talk.

Todoroki, who seemed like he somewhat possessed both yours and Bakugou’s quirks, just in the form of ice and fire, nonchalantly added that he saw you two together outside of school.

Oh how you and Bakugou both wanted to hit Mr. Half-n-Half for that subtle comment, said in his normal monotonous voice, acting like he had no care in the world.

“Yeah? And why the hell are you even looking at me and Y/N, huh, Icy-Hot?” Bakugou barks at him, and Todoroki merely looks away, acting uninterested in the conversation.

•─────────°❋❀°─────────•

You suppose reminiscing on your U.A days together wasn’t the best decision to be making as you packed your bags. Standing at the foot of your bed—old bed—with your luggage on top, piling clothes into it, you had to gulp back tears that threatened to spill.

You heard the door to your apartment—old apartment—open, and you instantaneously tensed. You had hoped that you could get out of the apartment before Katsuki got home, but apparently nothing could go your way.

“Hey, Y/N?” you heard Bakugou’s voice call out from either the living room or kitchen, sounding a bit grumpy, which was his default tone anyways.

You stilled, not daring to say anything.

“She left a note? Silly woman?” you heard him mumble to himself, and you realized he was now looking at the farewell letter you had left on the coffee table. 

It almost broke your heart to hear him say silly woman. Bakugou’s vocabulary almost always consisted of insults and curse words, but he tended to substitute his normal vulgar language for something more tender if it was directed at you. Now, if he was speaking to Kirishima, he’d probably get called a shitty man.

Tears fells rapidly down your face, and you held your hand to your mouth to try to muffle any sobs.

“What the—” you heard Bakugou curse, and an explosion followed. You could already imagine the crumpled up letter in ashes and scorched.

“Like hell she thinks—”

His footsteps vibrated through the apartment, and you knew he was making his way towards the bedroom. Unsure if he knew you were home or not, you quickly manipulated the tears on your face to the door, freezing the lock.

As if that would do anything, you scoffed to yourself, really hating the fact that Bakugou could easily melt the ice or just blow up the entire door.

“Y/N?!” Bakugou’s voice was frantic when he realized you were home on the other side of the door. “You silly woman, open this damn door and talk to me!”

He wiggled on it a few times, pounding on it.

You didn’t answer, and frantically closed your luggage. You glanced around, seeing nothing else you needed. The rest of them could be repurchased if you were to just leave now.

You looked at the window, at the jump it would be to get to the floor from your fourth floor apartment. It was a good thing you were a hero trained for stunts like this.

“Goddamit,” Bakugou grumbled. “If you’re near the door, stand back, I’m blasting it to shreds.”

But you weren’t by the door, before you were jumping out of your old bedroom window with your suitcase in your arms and tears flying down your face. Bakugou ran to the window, watching as you ran down the street, not even stopping to look at him.

His eyes drooped, and he watched you go, replaying the words in your note over and over again.

“Katsuki,

If you’re reading this, then I’ve made my leave from the place we once shared together and called home. I suppose you’re out right now, with that girl. You know the one I’m talking about. The same one I saw you with last month while I was grocery shopping, and I brushed it off as a fan or civilian who had borrowed a few moments of your time. Then, it seemed as if you grew more distant from me. Always on your phone, always distracted, always with a guilty look behind your ruby eyes.

Then, I saw you with her a few more times, but again, I tried to push the image of you to the back of my head because who said you can’t make new friends?

The image I couldn’t push to the back of my head was the image I had yesterday, walking into the apartment around noon to surprise you with lunch on your day off. You had expected I’d be out all day, and there you were, asleep on our bed with a woman who was not me, letting her sleep on my side and letting her cuddle up to the man who was mine. Mine since high school. Mine since the days when he was intolerable to most of our classmates, but I saw through his angry demeanor and tried to pour and push and shove as much love into his sorry personality as I could.

And all of our friends had thought I had done a good job. I guess I didn’t do as good a job as I thought.

But how dare you? I’m not saying that I deserve to be loved back all because I loved you, but I did deserve more than being half-loved. I deserved more than being loved just enough to not want to leave, but seeing someone else on the side. I deserved more than this deception and betrayal.

If my best was no longer good enough for you, you should’ve told me instead of allowing another person in our home.

Don’t go destroying other people’s perception of love just because you no longer feel any for them. I wish you had just broken up with me instead.

So, I’m the one that’s leaving, and like you, I’m offering you no chance to talk about it. Just like you gave me no chance of talking about what to do with our relationship when you began falling out of love with me.

I think I might always love you, Katsuki,

But today, I am going to do what you couldn’t, and love me more.”

[nika324]

Alice and these posts… ma’am… plz. Hour 639 of me breaking down. It’s the way my IRL friends are texting me and loving every minute of season 5 and then I have to act like a normal person when they txt me. 🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏽‍♀️ I am soooo down bad. It’s giving crazy ex who can’t move on. 🥲 I’ve been scrolling through the hashtag on Twitter, trying to get excitement from the new viewers. And I’ve been scrolling through my live tweets, trying to live through them. I found a tweet I sent out from when she pulled KG’s gun on him and I almost threw up rereading it. However, I was so pleased when she did it. ☺️😌 One of my boos found most of the season 1 filming locations. One of these weekends, I’m taking myself on a QOTS Dallas tour. 😭😂

***

Just to piggyback off of Eva’s post from last night, 90% of the fandom I’ve encountered has been really sweet and really nice. This is my first and probably only fictional fandom and this has been a such great experience. No matter how I may feel about the final season, I am soooo grateful for the show, the introduction to these amazing ass actors (specifically Alice), and the ppl I have met so far. I’ve learned so much as far as TV and fandom shit. Lemme make yall laugh. For almost the entirety of season 5, I was in our group chat lost & confused AF. The girls would be in there, talking in fandom code. “Canon” this, “head canon”, “OTP” that, such and such’s ”arc” and I’m in the group chat trying to look for context clues bc I ain’t know (still confused sometimes tbh. Y’all be patient with me 😂) what none of that shit meant. Like literally… elevator music and tumbleweeds in my head. 😭😭 So finally around episode 8, I finally asked them to tell me what all that shit meant. 💀 This series and experience also exposed me to the world of fics and shit. Never in my life would I think I’d be reading fictional work for this show and writing shit. 💀 But..real life is overwhelming sometimes and especially as of late with all this shit going on in the world, so fics are a great escape. I’m also PMSing so… bad combo. 😕 Anyways… y’all are great. 🖤🤍🥺

You stuck with me for life, @allthingsjeresa You knew that already. ☺️

[teddy06writes]

Locked Away

Requested by this anon: “Heyo! Can I please request an Awesamdude x Fem!Reader in which the reader is an inmate at Sam’s prison? Not Stockholm syndrome or anything because the reader already had a crush on Sam before being put in there. Thanks!” 

And also this one: “ please i will cry if i don’t get more awesamdude content. i’ve scrolled to the very end of his every hashtag.” 

Awesamdude x fem!reader

trigger warnings: some swearing, yelling, manipulation (dream’s the reason your in prison), character death

premise: In game AU; or the past three months you’d been under Dream’s control, only half aware of what was going on, the last thing you can remember from before was talking to Sam almost telling him your feelings, but now, as you are suddenly yanked from his control you find yourself being thrown in prison, now under his watchful eye

{oh there is no fluff here fellas} 

“blep” talking

‘belp’ talking but its the green bitches voice in your head

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You were drifting, drifting through your strange, foggy world, doing your best to forget about the way you could barley control your own body, just a puppet on strings, when yelling, not of the voice that you’d been hearing, but of someone else, cut through the  smog. 

-“It’s over!”-

-”none of this will ever be over”-

The voice, it was your own but it didn’t belong to you. 

-”Dream has Surrendered (y/n), we can’t allow you to continue on his work”-

Growing bored you begin to drift away again, barley seeing, or feeling the people dragging you away. 

Sometime later, you’d been drifting, and then were suddenly plummeting back down into your body, a strangled sound escaping your throat as you regained control of your own body. 

“What the fuck?” A loud voice asked. 

You jerked your head up, turning to see that it was Sapnap who had been restraining you as you shuffled along, weakly asking, “Wha-? Sapnap- what’re you? Wh- what?” 

You looked around frantically at the smooth Blackstone walls, and down the hallway to where Bad and Sam are moving through unlocking a series of locks, “Where? Wha- Where I am I? Wh- wh- wh- what’s going on?” 

“Yeah nice try,” Sapnap scoffed, “I’m not letting you go because of fake amnesia.” 

“No- it- I-” Panic was rising in your chest as Sam and Bad finished with the locks and pulled open a door to what looked like a cell. 

“You think we shackle her like we did with him?” Sapnap asked, all but dragging you forward. 

Bad was clearly about to nod when Sam stopped him, obviously conflicted as he searched your eyes, “No. She won’t need them.” 

“What is happening right now?” You asked desperately. 

Ignoring you Sapnap nodded, pulling your forward and pushing you into the cell, the barred door closing behind you, “Well, you don’t need me anymore, I’m gonna go talk to Dream.” 

“Be careful.” Bad advised and Sam began to relock the door. 

You slowly, shakily, pulled yourself to your feet, look through the bars at Sam and Bad, “What is going on?”

Bad frowned, almost glaring at you, “(y/n) this is what happens to people who do bad things. Siding with Dream is just about the worst thing you could have done.” 

“Side wit- side with Dream?” You blinked, rubbing at your temples as panicked tears began to prick at the corners of your eyes, “I- I didn’t- I wouldn’t-” 

Bad simply turned away as Sam finished the locks, taking in a shaky breath, “We trusted you, you know?” 

“I- Sam- I didn’t- Sam I don’t know whats going on? Where am I? I didn’t- I didn’t side with Dream- I would never side with Dream.” You said desperately. 

“This is The Prison (y/n), entirely unescapable, made for people li- like you,” His voice wavered, and quickly he turned, “There's no getting out.” 

You cried yourself to sleep that night, small sobs echoing through the empty halls of the prison; in his office Sam felt each new sob in his chest; in his cell, with each new sob Dream’s smile only grew larger.

~~

Sam sighed, blocking out Dream’s monologue as he slid the tray of food through the opened slot in the door. 

Dream’s cell had no bars, just a full steel door, and a tiny window in the ceiling, yet the man seemed to enjoy it, far to much. 

“You know how funny it was to see (y/n) getting dragged in here?” Dream laughter shrilly. 

“You were in here, there was no way you could’ve seen anything.” Sam replied sharply. 

“Oh but I hear everything,” Dream laughed again, “Stupid bitch didn’t even know what was going on, god I didn’t think it’d be that easy to get in her dumbass head.” 

“Don’t call her that,” Sam hissed, slamming the slot shut and locking it, “I don’t want another word out of you until you’re giving me that fucking tray back.” 

Ten minutes later the hallway your cell was in was deadly silent other than Sam’s footsteps, “Food time.” 

He slid the tray into the slot of your door, and look picked your head up from leaning back on the wall to look at him, “You do realize something’s wrong here, right?” 

“I mean, you siding with Dream was certainly wrong.” Sam muttered. 

You sounded utterly broken and defeated as you moved to lay back on your cot, turning to face the wall, “I didn’t realize manipulation was a form of agreement.” 

Sam sighed, “Are you gonna eat this or not? I’m not suppose to leave till you do.” 

“Then I guess your going to have to sit here.” 

The first 15 minutes passed in silence, Sam resigning to sit on the floor outside your cell as the minutes ticked on, eventually asking, “You were saying you didn’t remember anything, what exactly do you remember?” 

“You.” The word was simple enough, “We were talking- you said you thought you could do something. Tried to walk me home but I said I’d be fine. Dream was waiting at my house.” 

Sam hummed, a slight anxiety rising in his chest, “What did I think I could do?” 

You sighed, studying the Blackstone wall, “You said ‘I think I might be able to love you’ but with whatever I did there's no way it’s true anymore.” 

Sam stayed quiet, thinking back on that night nearly two months ago, plans for the building of that very prison were being finalized, he’d felt so on top of the world he’d admitted the feelings weighing him down, but then you had become strange, distant. 

“Why did you do it?” He asked eventually. 

“Do what?” 

“Y- you were helping Dream, with fighting New L’manburg, exiling Tommy, blowing up L’manburg again, you- you helped him round up the things that hold power.” 

You frozen, distant foggy memories flaring up in your mind, a thousand answers presenting themselves, ultimately deciding on, “Do you know what it feels like, to not be in control of your mind? To be stuck in the passengers seat as a madman takes to the road?”

He was silent as you continued, “To have your consciousness so nearly severed from your body that you can barley see or feel what’s going on? I didn’t have a chance to ask what was going on. He was just there, in my brain. Do you know what that’s like? I’d say you shouldn’t. Just take that food back and leave. Let me go back to dreaming of a future I missed out on.” 

~~

“How did it happen?” 

Another quiet question, another quiet silence interrupted. 

“It’s- foggy,” You admitted, more to the ceiling than to Sam, “But I think- I think it was like a switch got flipped. Could still be flipped. Then he’d be in control again.” 

A week had passed since you’d been locked away, and still Sam would sit, until you finished your food, or, more like, until you finally pushed the food away, still refusing to eat despite the pangs of hunger. 

“I- I didn’t kill anyone, did I?” You hazarded. 

“I don’t know,” He admitted, “Even if you did, that wasn’t you. Nothing you did then was you.” 

“Stop doing that.” You muttered, rolling over to face the wall yet again. 

“Doing what?” 

“Saying things you would’ve said before,” You said bitterly, “You can’t treat me like a monster one second and then like a lover the next. I may be a monster thanks to him but I do not think I deserve that.” 

“You’re not-” 

“A monster?” You cut him off, “That why I can still fucking hear him sometimes? Taunting me? Threatening to take over again?” 

Sam froze, looking back through the bars to your turned back, “You can here him?” 

Your hands began to shake, thinking about the barren whispers that filled your head at night, forcing yourself to sit up and turn back to him, plucking a small piece of bread from the tray, “Sometimes.” 

“How? His cell is on the other side of this place.” 

“He’s in my head, still hasn’t fully left, that is,” You sighed, biting off a small chunk of the bread before tossing it back on the tray and pushing it toward the door, “Thank you.” 

Reluctantly Sam took the tray, standing up and starting to trudge back down the hallway, “I won’t let him hurt you.” 

Soon, he journeyed back down to the level where Dream was being held. 

“I had a feel you’d be down here.” Sam could hear the smirk in Dream’s voice. 

“What did you do to her?” 

Dream chuckled, “I guess that depends on what you mean. Technically I didn’t do anything, that was all her.” 

“What did you do?” He repeated. 

“Nothing of consequence. For me at least. Honestly it was really quite easy to get in her head, didn’t even fight it,” Dream shifted, letting out a harsh laugh, “Part of me thinks it was like she was already that bad. Just as evil as me.” 

Sam crossed his arms, “No one could be as evil as you, least of all her.” 

“Of course you’d think so,” Dream laughed, “Course you’d think better of a monster.” 

~~

‘you think he’s ever going to forgive you?’ 

‘you’re a monster (y/n) nothing can change that.’ 

‘no matter how much you beg, no matter how much you try to get them to understand it was me, they will never let you out.’ 

His voice haunted you, keeping you up far into the night, words etching themselves into the walls of your mind. 

‘he will never forget what you did.’ 

‘you ruined people, you worked for me, and that makes you evil.’ 

‘Your a monster. And even if you weren’t one before, I’ll make sure you become one.’

“You don’t control me.” You muttered up into the darkness. 

‘oh (y/n) your so naïve.’ 

“Shut up.” You muttered more forcefully. 

‘you think I can’t control you from here? you are a fucking fool.’ 

Almost immediately a feeling of panic surged through you as something changed, the switch in your head being flipped once again, the last thing you could truly hear as he took over was two harsh words. 

‘you’re mine.’ 

~~

It was early in the morning when Sam had woken up to a panicked sounding Bad over the coms, “I don’t know what's happening!! It- it sounds like- like someone's trying to kill her!” 

Almost immediately Sam was up and sprinting down the corridor.

It took him all too long to reach your level, where Bad was frantically trying to undo the locks on your cell. 

“Get out of the way!” He yelled, pulling out the master key card as he heard the obvious sounds of someone being choked. 

It took yet a moment longer to get the cell door open, to find you one hand clamped around your own throat, the other desperately trying to pry it off. 

“Bad go get healing pots!” Sam yelled, immediately rushing forward to help you as Bad went running. 

It took him a moment to wrench your hand away from your neck, just long enough for you to cough twice, looking up at him in fear, “Sam, run.” 

His brow furrowed, looking down at you confused as your face seemed to shift, and then suddenly you were throwing him across the room.

Sam watched, dazed as you bolted out of the cell and down the hall, master key card in hand.

By the time he had dragged himself to his feet, and his vision had cleared itself of the spots that had drifted through there were several alarms going off, and distantly, he could hear people running.

“Bad! Ant! Give me an update, what’s happening?!” He yelled into the coms, already starting to run to where he suspected the noise was coming from.

“The key cards! She got the key cards! They’re headed for south sector!” Ant yelled back.

“I want someone back in the control room,” Sam ordered, “Turn the mining fatigue up, set the lava traps and get guards on the outer perimeter. We can’t let Dream escape.”

Sam continued to run, listening to chatter over the coms as to where you were headed, quickly gaining.

~~

“Freeze!” Sapnaps loud voice echoed through the corridor.

Dream turned from where you were toiling to break the wall to see Sapnap, Antfrost, BBH, and Sam all aprouching, crossbows drawn.

“Surrender now and we won’t take your last life.”

Dream merely laughed, looking his former friends in the eye, “You can’t stop me.”

“It’s four on two, seems like pretty good odds in our favor.” Sam hazarded, stepping forward and breaking the line.

Dream seemed to size him up, before glancing to you, “Kill them.”

The words were simple, and clear.

You stood, dropping your pickaxe and donning the armor nabbed while on the run.

“(Y/n), don’t-” Sam said cautiously, lowering his crossbow. 

Dream sneered at him, drawing the other sword taken from the armory as Sapnap drew his own, “(y/n), fight him, I can take care of the rest.” 

You nodded obediently holding up your sword before launching yourself towards Sam. 

Sam raised his shield, blocking your first thrust, and then the second, quickly trying to back away from you as Dream attacked his comrades, “(y/n) don’t do this!” 

His words fell upon deaf ears as you attacked again, this time grazing Sam’s arm with your blade. 

He yelped in pain, instinctively starting to swing back, though not heavily enough to hurt you. 

The sounds of fighting echoed through the corridor as you and Dream clashed with the guard, the men Dream attacked falling quickly until it was just you and Sam battling it out. 

You slashed again at his arm, this time penetrating deep into the exposed skin on his inner arm, using his pause and yell of pain as time to kick him back knocking the sword out of his hand and pinning him to the ground with your boot. 

Your sword poised at his throat you looked to Dream, waiting for confirmation. 

When the man nodded Sam desperately reached out to you, “(y/n), (y/n) please- don’t- plea-” 

~~

You’d been drifting again, thinking of the night before Dream had taken you. 

It had been late, you had stayed to long gazing at the sky, and Sam had found you sitting by the prime path. 

He’d sat down next to you, and for a while you talked about everything and nothing all at once, until you’d laughed, and in some sort of sleep drunk state, leaned in and tried to kiss him. 

Much to your surprise he had kissed back, giving you a murmured confession, the same one you heard now, yelled and frantic.

-”(y/n) please! I- I think- I love you- Don’t do this! Don’t-”-

The strings were cut, and you plummeted back into your own body in time to see a blade cutting into his neck. 

“S-Sam?” Your eyes traveled up the blade, to the hand clasped around the grip- your hand. 

“Sam!” You were desperate now, tossing the sword away with a clatter as fresh tears sprang in your eyes. 

Distantly you could hear Dream laughing as you leaned over Sam’s body, “Sam no! Sam- Sam- I told you to run- I told you to run! Why? Why didn’t you? Sam! Please! No!” 

The only thing you got in return was Dream’s wild laugh, and the blade being thrust into your back. 

[fruitcoops]

Omg can you write about coops going live on instagram and answering TONS of fans questions? And just being domestic and cute together in general

I can, yes! This is partially the 450 celebration--to the lovely person who suggested writing a sequel to one of my favorites, please know that I love and appreciate you! Coop credit goes to @lumosinlove

Check out Part 1 here

“Is it working? I think it’s working.” An explosion of hearts covered the screen and Remus’ eyebrows rose. “Yep, definitely working. Hello, Instagram! I’m Remus Lupin, winger for the Lions.”

“And I’m Sirius Black, center and team captain.” Sirius waved at the phone. “We had a great time answering your questions last month and we figured we’d come back to do it again, since there were so many people we couldn’t get around to in those few minutes.”

“I can already see a bunch coming in. Should we start?” Remus asked, turning to him with a small smile.

“You go first.”

“Alright, first question….” He squinted at the screen. “How long have we been together? We’ve been dating for just over a year now, but we’ve known each other for three-ish.”

Sirius snorted when he read the next question. “What do we do in our free time? It’s cute that you think we have free time. Um, we read a lot. Sometimes I’ll play video games with the guys.”

“If we have a free weekend, we’ll go hiking or take a short road trip. Practice takes up four or five hours a day, so we’re very low-key, which I think surprises people.” Remus scrolled down a bit. “What are our favorite foods?”

“Don’t say it.” Sirius said immediately. “Don’t you dare.”

“Fine, fine.” Just as Sirius began to answer, he coughed, “pineapple pizza.”

“No!” Sirius smacked Remus on the arm with a pillow as he laughed. “Menace. My favorite food is pasta, because it’s versatile and I’m not a heathen. All of you who are agreeing with him, stop it right now. I’m very disappointed in your tastebuds. Next question…do either of us cook? We do, yeah.”

Remus gave him a look. “Do you, though?”

“That’s a funny thing to hear coming from the man who said he’d die for one of my grilled cheeses yesterday,” Sirius countered.

“Fair point. Yes, we both cook, but I generally do it more often because I enjoy it.”

Sirius looked back at the camera with sad eyes. “He kicked me out of the kitchen last week.”

“You kept stealing bites of soup!” Remus laughed. “It wasn’t even done, you could have gotten salmonella!”

“You can’t get salmonella from soup,” Sirius scoffed. The comment section went wild. “…apparently you can. Huh.”

“Next question, before we get too off-track. Who is the more dramatic one?” Remus folded his hands and rested his chin on top. “I’m giving you three guesses and the first two don’t count.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “You’re plenty dramatic.”

“Uh-huh, sure.”

“Moving on! Oooo, this one is for me specifically.” He shifted closer, wrapping an arm around Remus’ waist as he read. “Sirius: does Regulus—you spelled that wrong by the way, there’s only one ‘g’—does Regulus still live with you? If yes, how does that work?”

“I’m telling him someone spelled his name wrong,” Remus said as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. “He’ll get a kick out of it.”

“He’ll be so pissed,” Sirius agreed. “Nope, Reg moved out a few months ago and now lives with Pascal Dumais, but it was really neat to have him around. He’s still got a room here and it was nice spending so much time with him after we didn’t talk for a while. He’s awful about vacuuming, though.”

“Aw, people think that’s cute.” Remus smiled as he read the responses. “Ohoho, people are getting nosy. What do we argue about the most?”

“I’m not sure, actually. Maybe chores?”

“I was going to say practice time. We’ve gotten into a couple tiffs about watching tape or running drills after we get home.”

“That’s true.” Sirius frowned at the screen. “For those of you who apparently think that’s all one-sided: it’s really not.”

“He came downstairs to get me at ten or eleven at night the other day. We’re both hockey nerds, so it happens from time to time.”

“Are we going to keep doing tiktoks? Oh, for sure, they’re a ton of fun.”

“Absolutely. Where else am I going to get the inspiration to glue things shut just to irritate him?”

Sirius shook his head with a smile. “Diablotin.”

“Nothing like being called a gremlin by your fiancé,” Remus laughed, tapping the screen. “Okay…who’s the best in bed?”

“I’d say we both sleep really well,” Sirius said. “You talk sometimes, which is really funny.���

Remus glanced over. “Do I really?”

“Yep. I think you were grocery shopping the other night. You kept saying orange juice very adamantly.”

“Interesting. I agree, though, we both value sleep.”

“There are too many questions!” Sirius scooted forward and sifted through them. “To jay-mac 2001, we both love kids and might have some in a few years. No, mermaid queen, we don’t really have friends outside of hockey because we don’t have lives outside of hockey—” Remus leaned his forehead on Sirius’ shoulder as he laughed. “—but I’m sure that will change someday. Oh, here’s a fun one: what are our love languages?”

“Our what?”

“Love languages. Like the Buzzfeed quiz Pots made us take last week.” The screen lit up and Sirius looked offended. “Of course we know what Buzzfeed is! We’re 25, you fuckers!”

“I think mine was quality time.”

Sirius pulled Remus’ arm further around his shoulders and leaned into his side with a smile. “It’s physical affection,” he singsonged, making him laugh. “Your turn.”

“Have you finally found your song?” Remus read aloud. “I think so! We did an interview a while back and there was a question about our ‘couple song’, which we didn’t have at the time.”

“That didn’t answer the question, sweetheart.”

“Oh! Shit, sorry. It’s La Vie En Rose by Edith Piaf.”

Sirius read the next question and snorted. “This is convenient. Who swears more?”

Remus looked away. “It’s, uh, a tie.”

“That’s such a lie.”

He sighed. “It’s probably me.”

“You taught a literal baby to swear.” Sirius turned back to the camera with a wicked grin. “Harry’s first word was ‘Loops’, but his second was ‘shit’ and there’s an eighty percent chance he learned it from Re.”

“Changing the subject!” Remus cleared his throat, then smiled. “Aw, I like this one. What’s the compliment you get most often from your partner?”

“Does it have to be verbal?”

“Sirius.”

Sirius’ eyes went wide. “Not like that! Oh, fuck, I did not mean that! You always touch my hair, so I figured that was a compliment. Merde.”

Remus shook his head. “We need a supervisor again. Anyways, you talk about my freckles all the time and it’s adorable.”

“You’re adorable.”

“Sap.”

“Yeah.” Sirius kissed his cheek. “What’s the best date I’ve ever been on? We went ice skating at the local rink a few weeks ago and it was so much fun. I had never done that before.”

Remus’ eyebrows rose. “I thought for sure you would say the aquarium.”

“The aqu—oh, right! With the jellyfish arch!”

“Yeah!”

“Now it’s a tie, I can’t decide.”

“That’s fair. From spaceman93: who tops? We actually don’t have a bunk bed, though that would be cool as hell! Do you think Ikea sells them?”

“We should check.”

The screen exploded into activity again and Remus did a double-take. “Yes, we do buy our furniture from Ikea, there’s no need to sound so shocked. This person—I can’t read your username, sorry—wants to know which of us is more cuddly.”

“Definitely me,” Sirius said.

“For sure. I like cuddling people, but only a select few. I mean, I’m assuming you guys saw the Cap cuddles slideshow at our last game.” He laughed when Sirius turned pink. “Why are you embarrassed? It was cute!”

“There’s a hashtag now!” Sirius complained. “I have a reputation.” Remus rolled his eyes fondly as Sirius looked for the next question. “Ha! Do we ever get jealous?”

“Yes, but not for the reasons people might think.”

Sirius laughed quietly. “We went out to a bar for Kasey’s birthday a month or so ago—”

“Oh, please no.”

“—and a young lady was hitting on me, not taking the hint—”

“Jesus.”

“—so Re comes out of nowhere and kisses me full on the mouth in front of everyone.” He snickered and Remus hid his face in his hands. “It was kinda hot, not gonna lie. Really funny looking back, though. Your turn, sweetheart.”

“Who is clumsier? Ooh, we’re both disasters off the ice. I tripped over the carpet about twenty minutes ago.”

“I’ve run into every doorframe in this house at least twice.” Sirius grimaced. “If I could just tape my skates to my feet and always be on ice, that would be much safer.”

Remus cocked his head to the side. “I dunno, it would be hard to sleep in them.”

“I do that all that time.”

“That’s true, you take a nap in the hall at least once a week in full gear.”

“Reverse Edward Scissorhands.” They had to take a moment to stop laughing before Sirius turned back to the phone. “Mon dieu. Alright, what do we have next…when did you know I was ‘the one’? When did you know, mon amour?”

“Breaking out the nicknames, very snazzy,” Remus teased as he rested his chin on his hand. “I think it was just an accumulation of things, and then one day I went ‘oh shit’ and just knew. Sometime around New Year’s, maybe?”

“You only made it two months?” Sirius teased, nudging him lightly.

“Shush, you.” Remus nudged him back. “I knew I wanted to propose when I came home from hanging out with Leo and you were napping with the dog. You had done the dishes and left Avatar on so we could watch it together, and I opened the door and knew that I wanted that moment forever.”

Sirius smile was unbearably soft, and he kissed Remus on the cheek as hearts filled the comments section. “I’ve never seen so many keysmashes in my life,” he laughed when he looked back to it. “Hey, someone addressed one to you specifically.”

“Really?” He leaned forward eagerly. “To Remus, do you feel like part of the team yet? I do, a hundred percent! It helped that I was close with a lot of the guys from being the PT, so those friendships carried over really well. Being a player on the roster has only made that better and it’s the best job in the world.”

“Who has the better smile? We’re going to say each other, so I think we’ll leave that one to the comments—fuck, that was a bad idea, it’s moving too fast for me to read!” Sirius tapped the screen desperately, then gave up and waited for the scrolling to slow down. “Ask each other one question you’ve always wanted to know the answer to.”

“Do you actually want to get your ears pierced?” Remus asked. “You talked about it a while ago but I wasn’t sure if you were kidding.”

Sirius thought for a minute, biting his lip. “Y’know, I might. It was one of those things where it started as a joke and then I kept thinking about it. I’m not sure, hockey’s not the best sport to have things that can catch and tear.” They both winced at the idea. “My turn. What is it about pineapple pizza that you actually enjoy?”

“It annoys you.” Remus laughed as Sirius rolled his eyes. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding! I honestly don’t know why I like it so much. There’s something about the sweetness that goes so well with the regular pizza taste. Okay, last question for me: how many freckles do I have? Not many right now.”

“So many in the summer,” Sirius said dreamily. “That’s the best part of summertime and the only reason I like Florida. They might have bouncy ice, but it’s worth it to see the freckles pop.”

“Whew, Florida’s getting mad in the comments!” Remus grinned. “Get some real ice, then come talk to us.”

“Final question, then we really have to go. What does your partner look best in?” Sirius drummed his fingers on his knees. “His jersey. Or my jersey. He does own a pair of skinny jeans, though, and that was the closest thing to a religious experience I’ve ever had.”

“They’re comfortable.” Remus shrugged, but he looked rather self-satisfied. “That’s all we have time for, folks, but thanks for joining us!”

“Go Lions!”

[halleehalfgallon]

✨another long post, TL;DR at the end ✨

a few days ago I took a “scroll” down memory

lane and revisited some old posts from my early instagram days. there were a lot of 1:1 pictures of people and places I loved at the time, moments and meals that were special, plants and sunsets and general reminders of good times gone by. there were also some things that broke my heart a little.

my journals from that time are full of rich observations about the pain and joy I experienced. they’re so full of yearning - for acceptance, for fellowship, for the chance to express myself fully and safely and for that to be met with open arms. but every bit of that was hidden within the pages, and the heart I wanted to share was guarded in over-the-top self-mockery; every caption, every selfie, every hashtag devoted to communicating the fact that I KNOW I’m a joke, and if you laugh you’re just laughing with me because I am all too aware what an embarrassment I am. I started taking this protective measure years and years ago to survive my own intensity, my too-muchness, and after a while it became second nature.

it is overwhelmingly clear to me in retrospect how long I wanted out of that mess and how trapped I felt in it back then. at a certain point I was so afraid of presenting any other version of myself than the one people had become used to that I couldn’t imagine showing them what was true.

I think I didn’t realize that people expect what they are used to being given, but that that doesn’t mean you can’t change what you give.

the imaginary shoes I have been trimming my feet to fit into are made of thoughts about myself that have blistered my heels my entire life long. the weepy cousin, the annoying friend, the harsh and unfiltered drama queen, the Britta of the group, the one who keeps things light and funny so she doesn’t have to connect and ends up bogging them down thick as molasses because a heart-to-heart is so overdue that it’s painful.

I am finding that as I slowly pick the old shoes off my feet I feel like an imposter, but I am learning not to give too much power to that way of thinking. new shoes have been calling me for years and I’ve been pretending like I don’t hear it.

[as I write this I realize that this is exactly the message of Encanto, so I guess watching it 6,000 times is really paying off!]

as for the TL;DR, I actually decided there isn’t one. I am growing weary of whittling the contents of my mind to fit inside of nutshells. it’s okay with me, though, if you don’t feel like reading them. 💛🌿

[chalkrevelations]

Word of Honor Ep 6, and let’s talk a little about what’s canon, and what’s not, and about the particular slip-slidiness of the line between them on this show.

But first, due diligence: If you are NEW or JUST VISITING, this is a re-watch, so you’re going to find SPOILERS not just for this ep, but for the entire show. Scroll away and come back later if you haven’t seen all 36.5 eps and want to watch unspoiled. Also, heads-up, this got super long, because I had to talk about that stuff up there and then still talk about the ep. Hashtag long post (remorseful).

So, “canon,” as applied to fannish source material (in Western fandom, at least) traditionally has been considered the official stuff – the episode, the book, the comic, the movie – based on the religious definition of  “canon,” the collection of texts accepted as genuine and official within a religion. The word “fanon” – widely accepted fannish ideas – plays on this, as does the fandom concept of “word of God,” or things the Creators have said about the text but outside of it. Is it in the show as it aired or the book as it was printed? Canon. Is it not in the show as it aired or the book as it was printed? Not canon. (Apocrypha? Maybe. Anyway.) Generally, I think we’d say that things like material in the first draft of a script that doesn’t make it through revisions and onto the screen isn’t canon, even if you can get your hands on a copy of the first draft. The final product that airs is what’s canon. BUT this gets super slippery in something like WoH, in a way that’s exemplified in this episode. This ep is one of the places where people who can lip-read Chinese have spotted some significant dialogue changes between what the actors say on-screen and what lines have been dubbed in. (Everybody’s dubbed in cdramas, it’s just the thing that happens. You have your on-screen actors, and you have your voice actors. The ONLY person in The Untamed who did his own voice dubbing, for instance, was Ji Li, who played Nie Huaisang. All the other characters had voice actors dubbed in. In fact, the voice actor for Jiang Cheng in The Untamed is the voice actor for Wen Kexing in WoH.) One of the descriptions of WoH that I’ve heard is that this show was filmed as a bl and dubbed as a bromance. The thing is, nobody tried very hard to hide the shift. There are plenty of places that you can clearly see the actor’s mouths don’t match the dubbing, and they’re not artfully shot or edited to hide this. They’re fully on-screen, mouthing words that don’t match, right out in the open, almost like they want to you to pick up on it. Almost like it’s canon, because it’s right there on-screen, aired in the episode. In my first-watch reactions to Eps 36 and 37, I talked a lot about how the dubbing puts a layer of de-queered no-homo over what the on-screen actors are saying in these places, but if you can see what they’re actually saying and understand it, does that make it canon? What does it mean, both textually and meta-textually, if you can’t believe what you’re hearing – what you’re being told – because it contradicts what you’re seeing? How does that affect what we’re told about Our Protagonists and its “truth,” particularly in the final scenes? How much is the show deliberately working against censorship in this way? How much is it teaching us to look deeper than what we’re hearing on the surface?

Several people have talked about what’s actually being said by the on-screen actors in places where this happens, and I’m going to direct you to AvenueX on Youtube if you want a complete overview, because she’s reliable and has a good compilation that’s easy to find. She has a couple of videos called “Lip Reading for Sugar,” and the March 9, 2021, installment includes the Ep 6 incidences, the most significant of which are: At 3:05 in the ep, when WKX throws himself on Zhou Zishu’s back during the zombie Drug Men attack, calls him “mom,” asks ZZS to carry him, and tells “mom” that “your shoulder blades are the most beautiful.” Only no, Gong Jun didn’t say this, if you watch his mouth compared to the sound of the words. Instead of “niang” (mom), he says “Zhou Zishu.” Twice. “Zhou Zishu, carry me.” “Zhou Zishu, your shoulder blades are the most beautiful.” This is not only important because it emphasizes he’s gay for Zhou Zishu’s shoulder blades, but also because he’s fucking baked on Drunk Like A Dream incense when it happens, and later, ZZS will reveal that Drunk Like a Dream makes you see what you most desire, and he’ll confront WKX about how he “kept calling” someone’s name while he was under the influence of it. This makes no sense with the dubbing we get, because with “mom” dubbed over ZZS’s name here, WKX only calls Zhou Zishu’s real name once while he’s under the influence, at the end of ep 5. That is not kept calling. ANYWAY, once WKX clears his head and flies them away from the Drug Men, back to the a lakeside, there’s another disjunct at 5:05, when the dubbing has WKX tell ZZS not to play hero, that he doesn’t lose face if WKX helps him, and ZZS responds with something about your grandmother’s bear, which AvenueX tells me is a real Chinese idiom, although not for what. What Gong Jun and Zhang Zhehan appear to actually have said, though, is that WKX tells ZZS that this was just like a hero saving a beauty, with the implication that ZZS is the beauty, the damsel in distress, and ZZS respons that no, it’s like the beauty saving the hero, without a lick of concern that he’s the beauty, the damsel, in this scenario, just that he did all the work killing Drug Men and now this asshole is going to act like he’s the one who did the saving. At 31:24, dubbing has WKX telling ZZS that he’ll give ZZS whatever he wants if ZZS can get him some of the Drunk Like a Dream, but AvenueX tells me that he actually offers his body in exchange, in a way that implies marriage. And at 32:22, when ZZS asks WKX what he saw under the influence of the Drunk Like a Dream, the dubbing gives us some random story about baby WKX throwing a rat on his mother’s bed, while Gong Jun’s mouth seems to be saying something something about being in the bridal chamber with his beloved … so circling back to our first instance at 3:05, WKX using Zhou ZIshu’s name is now super-interesting, eh?

Another slip-slidey point of canon here is that there are two versions of this episode. The original version didn’t have the rabbit-washing scene. That was an extra that was inserted later into a Special Version ep when Youku reached 2 million subscribers. But the Special Version is now available on Youku’s channel (it’s the one I watched for this re-watch), AND it’s the regular version that’s on Netflix. So at 25:28, we now get this adorable little scene where ZZS and WKX are cleaning two rabbits in the lake before cooking them, and WKX splashes ZZS who pretends to be irritated before splashing WKX back and running away up the riverbank, chased by WKX. It’s flirty and playful and ALSO a foreshadowing of the flashback we’re going to see in a later ep, when they play together for an afternoon as children. Wasn’t canon before. Now it is.

Anyway, even with the (bad) dubbing that we get, this is a fantastic WenZhou ep. We open with them still being menaced by the zombies Drug Men, with a lot of swordwork by ZZS before he starts flagging because of his Nails Issue, whereupon WKX instantly sobers up, goes Evil Ghost Valley Master on Imposter Hanged Ghost who’s controlling the Drug Men, kills him with his Fan of Death, then scoops up ZZS and flies him off to a lake, where he attempts to tenderly check ZZS’s pulse and take care of his wounds before ZZS slaps away his hand like an offended maiden. WKX has to give him the qi smackdown in order to hold him still to :coff: pull down his robes and suck out the poison from the Drug Men scratches on the back of his shoulder. :hands: I remember the first time around, watching this with my mouth hanging open, demanding to know the heterosexual explanation for this. (Also, if you’re rummaging on Youtube, the Five Straight Guys Watching Word of Honor for this ep is not to be missed. They’re a little questionable in their reaction to the poison sucking, but before that, they’re a bunch of squeamish babies over using the dagger to further slice open the wounds to get to the poison, and it’s HILARIOUS. They can’t even look at the screen once the dagger comes out, hiding behind their hands. I love them, more and more as the eps go on, but they are WEAK compared to even the newbiest hurt/comfort fangirl.) There’s some more back and forth between WKX and ZZS about revealing their true selves to each other, no you, no YOU. WKX makes it clear that he knows there’s something really wrong with ZZS, and then they fight, set to romantic music, and ZZS ends up falling in the lake. I do the victory arms (  \o/  ) to myself where I’m sitting on the couch and startle one of the cats, because FINALLY we’re going to get rid of that execrable fake facial hair. ZZS fucks with WKX by staying underwater long enough that WKX panics and also dives in, we get some really cheap and awful underwater effects, and ZZS reveals his face! They end up back on the edge of the lake, drying their perfectly dry outer robes, while they sit around the fire together in their perfectly dry inner robes, but I am not going to complain because y’all. I CANNOT with how smug and pleased ZZS is for just a moment about WKX mooning over how pretty he is. Then he remembers to be an ill-tempered gremlin and pokes at WKX with a flaming stick, but I had to rewind four times just to catch that little moment of satisfaction about being admired again – it’s subtle and gorgeous and Zhang Zhehan is going to kill me with his face one of these days. ZZS demands dinner on this date, and fake-coughs pitifully to get WKX to go hunt something down, while he stays and does his delightful little thinky face as he pokes at the Soul Winding Box they got from Imposter Hanged Ghost. Then we get a shot of WKX looking at ZZS before he heads off to catch some rabbits that confirms he now knows he’s really Zhou Zishu, rather than Zhou Xu.

So, we’ll get back to the Ghost and the Box in a minute, but I do want to mention that this whole ep is layered through with mini-references and thematic stuff. Imposter Hanged Ghost rings his little bell to control his Drug Men, and remember that, we’ll see that again. WKX asks if ZZS came from the Healer’s Valley when ZZS offers him an antidote to the Drug Man poison; we learn later that WKX, himself, is the one who came from the Healer’s Valley. When ZZS gets the Soul Winding Box open and finds a piece of the Glazed Armor inside (Danyang’s, taken off of Ao Laizi by Ghost Valley before he was hung at the gate of Sanbai Manor), he gives it to WKX, tells him to throw it away if he doesn’t want it. WKX says he couldn’t possibly, and that he’ll wear it because it’s his first gift from A-Xu. Compare this to the way Xie’er will wear Awful Yifu’s Glazed Armor around his neck. We also see some of the thematic and referential stuff come up in conversations that form a repeated pattern in this ep of ZZS stressing what a bad and dangerous person he is: He scoffs at the idea he’s from Healer’s Valley, and asks if he looks like someone who practices medicine; WKX responds that he looked like a professional killer (true) who was cruel in the abandoned temple (presumably while escaping Mirror Lake) and frightening to a kind-hearted man like WKX who can’t even kill a chicken (particularly amusing given the prep for New Year’s dinner in a later ep, when WKX is the only one who CAN). At the lakeside and again after ZZS hightails it away from Sanbai Manor when they spot Han Ying there (HAN YING, my beloved), WKX asks if ZZS is a fugitive, what he’s hiding from, and says that he’ll protect him – by reason, because would he kill anyone unreasonably (omg, where to even begin? How many guys have you choked out at this point)? When they’re arguing about ZZS revealing his “true” face, ZZS warns that most people who’ve seen his real appearance are dead (probably true). WKX says he’s not afraid of death (not his own, at least, we’ll see that the thing he’s afraid of is ZZS’s death). ZZS warns WKX that he’s not only sharp-tongued, he’s ruthless (true). He tells WKX that he’s murdered many people (true) and set them on fire (not unlikely, frankly) and committed many crimes (true, in a way, although they were state-sanctioned, making them legal, if morally reprehensible). This is the ZZS who put the Nails in himself, who talks to himself about what a truly awful shixiong he is, who tells Prince Jin that he’s only good as a weapon. I like how we see this at the same time that we’re starting to see the side of him that’ll preen when someone thinks he’s pretty - this is a process, and it’s subtle, not as high-drama as WKX’s, but it’s there, nonetheless.

We also formally meet Xie Wang in this ep, artfully posed and playing his pipa among the bodies – old and new – of Zhao Coffin Home. He and Changing Ghost have a bit of a slapfight over whose fault it is that Imposter Hanged Ghost, who was actually Long-Tongued Ghost, got killed and got his (Danyang’s) Glazed Armor took by WKX, when Changing Ghost stole it from Ao Laizi, put it in the Soul Winding Box and gave it to Long-Tongued Ghost specifically to deliver it to Xie Wang. Xie Wang is super cool through all of this, and I think we get a sense of how deadly he is by the way Changing Ghost backs down. So, here’s what’s falling together: Some iteration of Ghost Valley is working with Xie Wang and the Scorpion Sect, giving the Scorpions access to the Soul Winding Threads, which we saw used at the Mirror Lake massacre and in the woods outside of Sanbai Manor to kill Yu Tianjie in the last ep. Via Xie Wang, Ghost Vally has access to use of the Drug Men, which we’ve seen at the Zhao Coffin Home (so far), although we haven’t yet been told (I think) how Xie Wang got access to the potions to create Drug Men (we also know ZZS read about Drug Men in a book somewhere, and got enough info to engineer an antidote to them). Xie Wang and the Scorpions have access to Drunk Like a Dream incense, which had to come from Prince Jin’s court, having been engineered by ZZS based on a much stronger formulation. Han Ying, from Tian Chuang in Prince Jin’s court, has been seen at Sanbai Manor, Zhao Jing’s place.

Meanwhile Chengling is doing poorly, with no appetite and getting bellowed at some more by Shen Shen, who would be the worst if only I didn’t know everything I know, which makes me cringe when Zhao Jing refers to Chengling as “my son, now.” NO. RUN, Goldbean. For some more thematic and referential stuff in this ep, WKX calls Chengling a “lonely chick with no one to rely on” and tsks over the fact that he’s “surrounded by hounds smarter than foxes” now that he’s under the care of the Five Lakes Alliance. This is clearly to manipulate ZZS into thinking Chengling is better off with ZZS, but it also sounds like an awfully apt description of Zhen Yan in Ghost Valley. I’m just sayin’.

[katsuflossy]

Misguided Spark

Pairing: Kaminari Denki x black reader

TW: Suggestive themes, some obscenities, Becky

A/n: Why do I always get inspired by Tiktoks 😭😭 but anyways I’ve been giving Mr Bakugo wayy too much attention and neglecting our shocky boy Denki. So please enjoy!!! 💕

P.S. credit to my bb @iiminibattlehero for giving me a title when my brain was pooped😣

You’ve been with Denki for two years. After joining Uravity’s agency, you’ve met the bolt of lightning that struck through your beautiful black heart (this was after many failed pickup lines and one failed date that resulted in your favorite shirt getting seared off.) Denki did nothing to conceal you, in fact, he showed you off despite your protests; the few couples photos on his Instagram told the story of your love life—not secret but it’s none of your business. 

So why do his fans pair him up with every other hero?!

You would’ve understood if he was shipped with his friends and other heroes in the Big Leagues; your reputation being Uraraka’s sidekick had granted you some fame but you hadn’t reached the big pond yet. 

However, his mass of fans and reporters paired him with everyone under the sun—heroes and sidekicks alike—except you. Just last week Mina nearly choked out a reporter because he trailed her during her patrol, asking what she and Chargebolt did last night. Who knew a simple drink with close friends would spread like wildfire over the news. Oh, not to mention you were there too, holding Kaminari’s hand and laying your head on his shoulder. Your brown face and body had been cut out from every magazine seen the next day. The picture of Mina and Kaminari at an older drink night resurfaced on your timeline, showing Mina slapping his back as he choke-laughed on some beer. 

You didn’t tell Denki your insecurities about the whole world romanticizing him with other very pale—except for Mina’s case—heroes. You can picture his exact laugh, his hand falling on your cheek while affirming you had nothing to worry about. You’re his lovely lady forever and always. 

However, tonight was a different kind of irritation.

The bedroom finally fell quiet, your steamy session released the sexual tension during today’s joint practice. Kaminari’s eyes followed your heavenly molded ass all around the gym, and your own followed his nicely sculpted back when it was angled in your peripheral view. The deed was done now. Your finger made pointless drawings on his naked chest as you laid against his stomach, looking thoughtlessly up at him and his blonde glory. Two nude bodies curled against each other in comfortable silence.

At least that was the case until your phone pinged due to a notification. Your phone glowed the Twitter symbol, the only app you used to keep up with the hero scene and news. One glance at the title and you wished you had put your phone on Do Not Disturb.

Chargebolt's with a civilian fiancee?! Read more about the Electric hero dating top American chef, Becky Gudhear, and their secret relationship.

Your lips formed a scowl at the picture. The blond female chef was entering a car as Denki held her umbrella above her head, the rain clattering against the umbrella as he smiled at the lady. Only for you to remember the next two minutes after the photo was taken; Denki snatched you up, running through the rain as both screamed in delight. 

You shot up from his muscular chest, the middle of your brows creased and your brown thumb scrolled through the hashtags. Denki looked at you before going on his own phone.

Deku’s ratty shoes @noticemesemmpai: “I didn’t know Denki liked white girls *this goes completely with my fantasy*”

Ground zero’s harem girl @otakuforevaava: “Not him cheating on Mina.”

Ground zero’s harem girl #2 @lemmebiteacrumbofdatass: “@otakuforevaava Nah, he’s with Jiro. Did y’all not see when she gave him that hug?”

Your eyes darted from one ship to another, none ever mentioning you, before throwing your phone on the mattress. You swung your legs over the edge of the bed, removing yourself from its comfort to pace around the room in frustration. Denki cocked a brow at your strange behavior; you weren’t usually this upset and if you were, you’d simply just watch baby videos until you perked up. The screen glowed through the mattress despite being faced down, holding the secret of your furrowed eyebrows and sharp glare. He took up the phone, showing all the news outlets, fan mentions, and titles creating a relationship not with his black girlfriend but with some random lady that he helped out of the kindness of his heart. 

“Damn, they’re really going bonkers over this one act of kindness. Is Chivalry that dead?”

“As dead as their brains are.” You grumbled out, flopping back on to the edge of the bed.

“It’ll die out in a week. Give or take.” 

“Or not at all. They always come back when they spot you 6 feet from this lady, then resurface this same picture or even better crop me out and photoshop her in it!” Your outburst was met with silence and a wide-eyed, very concerned lighting wielder. 

“...but it’s cool tho.” 

“(Y/n)? Why didn’t you tell me this’d been hurting you?” Your gaze averted to your fingers, twiddling as your embarrassment heated your cheeks.

“I didn’t want to because I thought you’d think I was silly for thinking like that. Plus, I was the one that told you that being with a superhero like you will make me look like a whore trying to climb the ranks.”

“Silly? Baby, I nearly threw your teddy bear across the room because it was looking at your ass too much. If anything I’m the silly one.”

“You didn’t nearly throw Parker across the room, you did throw him across the room.” Two pairs of eyes went to the slumped bear at the opposite corner of the room. It’s patched tongue ratty due to the force it was a victim to.

“... And I’d do it again.” Your attempt to sigh only released the giggle in your throat as Denki continued.

“And baby? Fuck what these tabloids are saying. You’re a skillful fighter and Ochaco’s number one sidekick! If that isn’t a fine, brave, amazing woman then I don’t know what is.” Your body tingled in warmth, unable to hide the physical effects of his compliments as wrapped your arms around his neck, kissing him straight on his lips.

“Thank you Denki, I really needed to hear that.” 

“Oh, I’m not done yet.” He moved out of your embrace, kneeling to set his phone up on the bedside table. The lamp was used as support, showing the front camera the entirety of the room. 

“Denki? What are you doing?”

“Don’t worry doll, just sit there and look pretty.” He continued to tap against the screen before a familiar symbol popped up.

Tiktok, one of Denki’s favorite apps, met your eyes as it began to start up. Denki was one of the only pro heroes on Tiktok, which garnered him 5.5 million followers, and at least a million views each video he made. He swiped and scrolled until his eyes lighted up.

“Go put on my shirt. I don’t want them seeing any parts of you only for my pleasure.” You raised an eyebrow at the request but still complied. 

“Now come here, sexy.” Your footsteps hesitantly approached his side of the bed, unknowing about what scheme he made up in his brain. You stopped right where the camera couldn’t see you but you were too far for his liking, so he grabbed the plush of your thigh, pulling you close enough to bury his nose into your flesh. 

“That’s more like it. You ready?” 

“Denki I swear to God you better answer me. What are we doing—”

He tapped the screen, unaffected by your threat, and began to record. The beat was all too familiar before your eyes widened and your face erupted in heat. Sex Talk?!

“Aye uh...ahhh.” He wasted no time getting into character, sticking his tongue out as he winked at the camera. Your melanin-rich thigh stared back at you through the phone, making it known that the leg Denki held indeed belonged to a black person. His hand, under the shirt, kept firm on the back of your thigh to ensure that you stayed within the frame as he continued his Tiktok.

“Aye, bad bitch tastes like cherry kiwi, real big titties these double DDs.” He sings out the song, pointing to your very exposed thigh. Your face hot, the thought of this going online burned your face with not only embarrassment but also excitement. You buried your face in your hands as Denki skimmed your leg with his nose.

“Mwah…” He pressed his lips against your flesh, the epicenter sending tingling waves through your body as he looked straight up at you. His eyes twinkled with mischief as the sound ended. He grabbed the phone before you could reach it, hitting ‘post’ before you could snatch it out of his hand.

“Denki! Your PR manager is so going to kill me.” You scrolled through his phone frantically; it was already pinging with likes and comments from the video posted just 10 seconds ago.

He plucked the phone from your hands and placed it down on the table.

“Never mind that baby girl. The song said a bad bitch tastes like cherry kiwi and I suddenly forgot how that taste. Maybe I should sample you again…” Without ceasing he pressed his lips against yours, ready to start the night off again. 

(H/n)’s footstool @blackshipper: @theeofficialy/n this you? *Chargebolt’s new TikTok*

Chargebolt and (h/n) sittin in a tree @comegetyalljuice: I fucking knew it! (h/n)’s living our Chargebolt fantasy.

Stream Sex Talk by Megan @kpophoebutnotondalow: If your man ain’t kissing up your thigh like Chargebolt did with (h/n), is he even your man?

Mirko’s left rabbit foot @westanMirko: Guys, that’s not @theeofficialy/n, that’s Mirko duh…

You rolled your eyes at the tweet before scrolling through the rest of them. Denki’s chest raised and lowered as he looked through his own phone. Suddenly, you received an email notification. Your eyes widened as you read its body.

“Denki! Some talk show wants us to come in and talk about our relationship. They finally recognize that I’m your partner!” He craned his neck to face you, offering a smirk at your excitement.

“Good, that’ll show Parker who you’re real man is!” The teddy bear stayed in the corner it was thrown, now laying on its side, looking solemnly at the bed. 

“You’re annoying.”

“You still love me though.” A smile spanned your face as you inched closer to Denki’s. Your lips met his in a soft embrace before withdrawing. 

“Yeah, I do.”

[dearingbooks]

The Difference one Woman can make.

Late Friday night in June, we had stopped for a burger on the way to the cinema, we used to do family movie nights at the cinema when a new film came out that the majority of us wanted to watch, this time I was the one who was reluctant to go, sadly we do this significantly less now.  So, stubborn 2015 me, rolling her eyes and dragging her feet up the cinema steps to find our seats to watch the new Jurassic World movie. Pathetic! I thought, why pay money to watch a movie about a dinosaur theme park! My parents had completely lost it! Huffing and puffing I took my seat on the aisle and sipped my blue raspberry slushie and looked up at the big screen. Ugh! I wanted it to be over, quickly. I sat down and shut my mouth, despite not wanting to watch it, I wasn’t going to spoil it for the others; but I didn’t get why they would want to watch it, I watched the trailer before going, was not impressed, it looked dumb!

However, as much as my pre-Jurassic self would not like, I found who I was during that movie, I discovered a whole new admiration for actors and movies. I found that I related to the main female protagonist, Claire Dearing. She did not need a man, or children, she was so focused on her career and let no one boss her around. She was top dog, and I completely fell for this fictional character. I evolved through that movie with her character, I felt content with being a strong female who put career over family. I wanted to embody this fictional woman; I wanted to be her.

On the journey home I typed ‘Claire Dearing actress’ into google and saw this stunning redhead- Bryce Dallas Howard. I immediately recognised her from movies I had watched prior, and I was completely astounded at her range of characters she can portray and portray them well. After scrolling through her Wiki page and reading news articles about her, I learned that she is the daughter of Ron Howard, one of my parents’ favourite people in film.

“Dad, that woman in the movie is Ron Howard's daughter”, I needed to inform my family that my now favourite woman in film is the daughter of my parents’ favourite people in film. My parents were shocked that I enjoyed the movie despite my loud vocalisation of not wanting to watch it.

Googling ‘Bryce Dallas Howard’ became my new after school routine, learning that she applied to acting school as Bryce Dallas to avoid people knowing she is the daughter of an already famous actor and director, and she had met her true love at nineteen and is still happily married to him. Yet what most stuck out to the self-conscious, body hating 2015 me, was that Bryce wasn’t a skinny twig of a woman that you see in most movies, she had classy curves and promoted body positivity despite some backlash the media gave her. I made a connection with this woman I had never met because I too received negative comments about my figure, yet Bryce took that on the shoulder and learned to love herself. I wanted to feel that self-love about myself that she acquired.

After watching Jurassic World, I explored many more fandoms, and from there I became obsessed with movie franchises and TV shows, actors and directors. I could not give you a full list of all of the fandoms I am in, there are too many to count, and they have all played a role in helping me evolve to who I am today. All because I latched onto one character from one movie I did not even want to watch, one film got me hooked on this life: it’s like a drug. I cannot stop. I also went back and forth with my hairstyle due to this woman; in the movie Bryce has a stunning ginger graduated bob with a fringe, however I never had the guts to go ginger until now; shame the hairdressers are all shut.

Now, almost six years later Bryce Dallas Howard has had great success in directing two episodes of The Mandalorian. Over the Christmas break I watched the show with my dad, sat on the sofa, fire lit, the chocolate Labrador curled up between us, peach vodka and diet lemonade in my hand, hot cup of tea in my dad’s. We binge watched both seasons in a week (it’s amazing) and he was shocked to see ‘Directed by Bryce Dallas Howard’ at the end of one, let alone two episodes. “Shit, she’s come far in the past few years” he said putting another episode on.

Bryce allowed me to find my best friend, Iz, through Instagram; Bryce has brought so many people together it is so surreal. And when I found out that Iz was going to Southampton University in 2019, a 20-minute drive from my house, I was finally able to meet her, because of one woman we both adore. I was friends with Iz for three years before I was able to meet her, I asked my school friend to come along with me so she could film the moment Iz, and I met! We got pancakes and watched the second Maleficent movie at the cinema, it was one of the best days of my life. I was so thankful that I met a truly hilarious and loving girl through this one actress! Because of Bryce Dallas Howard, I have made so many other friends from all over the globe as they too idolise Bryce and together we have created the ‘BDH online family’. A small group of us do regular zoom calls to catch up and chat about the recent photos and updates that Bryce has posted on Instagram, talk about Covid-19 and the types of restrictions and lockdown rules each of our countries has. During one of our calls, we had the craziest idea- Invite Bryce to one of our zoom calls. Bryce said yes! And after a few months of organisation, we had the date. The date was-

My.

Birthday.

The day came around and I was so nervous, it was 11pm exactly. The Wi-Fi had cut out fifteen minutes before the call. I was in tears. Mascara down my face, puffy eyes, I joined the call with a few minutes to spare before Bryce joined it. My mum hung around off camera for the first 5 minutes to double check the Wi-Fi was stable, luckily it stabilised. The other girls had never been so glad to see me, everyone was panicked for me; I could not miss it for the world (despite telling my parents, in floods of tears, that I cannot join and that it’s the end of that).

“Kat! You’re here!” “Happy birthday!” “Are you okay? The Wi-Fi sorted?”

They all chimed, happy to see my little face in the bottom right corner of their computer screens. Luckily Iz was there, otherwise it would have been extremely awkward with only one of us since we are known as a duo in the online family, we have to do everything together, we come in a pair and there can’t just be one of us.

“Shit girls, that was stressful”

I hadn’t realised I was holding my breath until I exhaled the large breath when my    Wi-Fi settled, and I was on the call, I fixed my makeup and was ready to meet Bryce.

The few minutes we had before Bryce joined were intense, two of the girls left to get a drink and we weren’t sure if they would be back in time, luckily they did return.

“No way!” One of them, Anna who was hosting the call, gasped “Bryce is in the waiting room!”

We all freak for no more than 10 seconds, we compose ourselves then our faces are reshuffled, and we see this stunning glowing face that we all admire smiling at us. Omg, it's her.

“Hi girls!”

I have never smiled for so long in my entire life, my cheeks hurt afterwards. Don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining at all, it just hurt as I thought I would only be smiling for half an hour, since that is how long we were told Bryce had. However, we were speaking to Bryce for nearly an hour and a half, she just kept talking and asked us questions! She was so lovely to talk to, so relaxed; it was if I was talking to a friend that I had known for years!

“Before we go I want to all sing Kat a happy birthday!”

My idol wanted to sing me a happy birthday! The other girls were really ecstatic for me, I still can’t believe to this day that The Bryce Dallas Howard wanted to sing to me!

It was both the best and the worst happy birthday song that has be sung to me. It was the best because, well my idol was singing to me! And proposed the singing! It was the worst in terms of the actual song as they were all out of sync and lagging, it was bloody hilarious!

At 10:27pm the next evening, watching a rerun of Game of Thrones on Sky, I got a notification ‘Brycedhoward just posted’, I clicked the notification then see our smiling faces on her page, she posted a screenshot of our call on her social media! The call was supposed to be a secret so other fans weren’t upset. There’s a few snotty comments on the post, but they’re just jealous and to be frank, I don’t care! My smiley face is on her page forever! All ten of us have printed the screenshot of Bryce’s post off and put it in a frame, one day all ten of us hope to congregate somewhere, most likely in America, and sign the backs of all of our photos. I’m still in utter awe and shock-  How many celebrities have you seen that would do a free zoom call with some fans? Not a lot, and that amount is even slimmer when they talk for an extra hour than scheduled. Bryce truly is one of a kind and the best idol anyone could ever hope to have.

Compared to a zoom call with Bryce herself, the few times she has liked my comments on her posts feel like nothing in comparison! I remember being so excited, running downstairs to my parents.

“Mum! Dad! Bryce liked my comment! She knows I exist!”

“Was it actually her? Remember when you got a Facebook request from Robert Downey Jr and it turned out it was a fake account?”

I rolled my eyes at her, it was Bryce, it was her verified account. The comment was a book recommendation I had for her, she posted on her hashtag BDHbookshelf and I thought I’d take a chance and comment a book recommendation I had for her, and the chance paid off.

I cannot wait to see what the future holds with Bryce, she has been such an inspiration to me for the past few years, and she promotes such wonderful causes and body positivity! I hope to one day meet her and thank her in person for changing my life for the better, and I think I’ve come up with the perfect opportunity to meet her- Iz and I have decided to travel up to London for the Jurassic World Dominion premiere in 2022 (if Covid lets us!), we’d get a hotel and actually meet Bryce in person, as well as meeting other members of the online family!

Words cannot fully contain the admiration that I possess for Bryce, her soul is utterly and truly exquisite, she has been such a visionary while I’ve been transitioning from a girl who had no idea who she was with no dreams or aspirations, to a woman who has now found so many new friends and now knows who she wants to be.