#but I think Steve would have been 25 or 26 when he got frozen

[daydreamerdrew]

Captain America (2005) #25

[imjustthemechanic]

The Price of a Soul

Part 1/? - Agent Russel Part 2/? - The Letter Part 3/? - Miss Lake Part 4/? - The Stewardess Part 5/? - An Assassination Part 6/? - Fallout Part 7/? - Face to Face Part 8/? - Deals, Details, and Other Devils Part 9/? - Baggage Part 10/? - Private Funding Part 11/? - Just Passing Through Part 12/? - Party of Four Part 13/? - Resolute Part 14/? - The Wreck Part 15/? - Body Snatchers Part 16/? - Out of the Frying Pan Part 17/? - A Miracle Part 18/? - A Matter of Circumstance Part 19/? - Nome Part 20/? - The Future Part 21/? - A Hero’s Welcome Part 22/? - Up to Speed Part 23/? - Expect Further Delays Part 24/? - The Welcome Wagon Part 25/? - Fugitives Part 26/? - A Reluctant Accomplice Part 27/? - Deja Vu Part 28/? - Interview with a Madwoman

Hey, check it out, I’m still alive.

-

Peggy knew she couldn’t spend all her time moaning over the romantic dilemma life had presented her with.  She let herself dwell on it for a moment, then forced her mind on to more practical matters.  By the time they returned to the farmhouse, she’d decided how she wanted to approach this interrogation.

“I think you should talk to her first,” she told Kay.  “While I’m out of sight.”

“You’re the one who knows her,” Kay protested.

“Yes, but she’s expecting me,” Peggy reminded her.  “If we start with you, it’ll catch her off guard.”  She did not want Dottie to think she was in a position to make demands.

Kay nodded slowly.  “All right, you go down by the hood.  I’ll open the back.”

The back boot opened with a creak.  Peggy could immediately smell ammonia.  At some point during the night, Dottie had needed to relieve herself and had been either unwilling or unable to hold it in.  Peggy probably ought to have felt sorry for her, but after all Dottie had put her through, it was hard.

There was a silence that was just a bit too long to be the moment in which Kay pulled the tape off Dottie’s mouth, and Peggy found it rather reassuring that the woman could still be taken by surprise.

“Dobroye utro,” said Kay.  That meant good morning.  “Olga Barynova.”

“Kto ty?” asked Dottie.  Who are you?  Her voice was level and measured, deliberately toneless.

“I’m you, but smarter,” Kay replied in English.  “You didn’t read the message.  You didn’t think you needed to, because you already know everything. Surprise!”

There was another silence, as Dottie re-assessed the situation.  Peggy wondered what was going on in her head.

“You won’t take me back,” Dottie said.  “You’ll have to kill me.”

“You didn’t read the message,” Kay repeated.  “Do you want to know what it said, or are you just going to lie there in a puddle of your own piss trying to pretend you know what you’re talking about?”

Peggy really did rather wish she could see the expression on Dottie’s face. It was probably well worth seeing.

“What did the message say?” asked Dottie.

“That I have no intention of turning you back over to them,” Kay reassured her. “I want you and I to go back together, and we’re gonna burn the place down.”

Dottie laughed.  “That’s exactly what you would say if you were here to drag me back, because it’s exactly what I would say to you if our positions were reversed.”

“You don’t trust me?” asked Kay.  “You sure do seem to trust Peggy Carter, and I’m pretty sure she wants to see you rot in jail for the rest of your life.”

“Peggy thinks she’s one of the good guys,” Dottie snorted.  “She keeps her promises even when they’re stupid.  If you’re anything like me, you don’t know what a promise is.”

Peggy decided that was her cue.  She came and stepped into Dottie’s field of view.  It had clearly been a rough night for Dottie in the trunk of the car. She’d evidently struggled quite a bit, trying to loosen the tape, and had not succeeded.  There were red marks on the visible skin of her arms and legs where it had dug into her flesh.  Her hair was in disarray.  She did look momentarily surprised when Peggy came into view, but hid it quickly.

“Peggy, Peggy, Peggy,” she said, clucking her tongue  “You of all people should know better than to partner up with one of us.  We’re bad news.”

“I decided I needed some expert advice,” Peggy replied.  “Despite what Chief Thompson thinks, I am not nearly deranged enough to think like you do.”

“I’m not deranged,” said Dottie.  “I know exactly what I’m doing.  You just can’t believe that because it doesn’t align with your goals.”

“You want revenge,” said Kay.  “You want to get back into the USSR un-noticed and destroy the people who made you. You don’t want another little girl to ever become what you are.”

“I’m not that altruistic,” Dottie replied.  “I was seven years old when they put me and my best friend in a ring together and told us that only one could leave.  I just want them to suffer.”  She smiled tranquilly.

“So do I,” Kay promised.

“I don’t believe you,” Dottie told her flatly.  “What’s in this for you, Peggy?  Or are you the altruistic one?”

Peggy decided on the truth.  “Kay has informed me that one of Captain America’s men is a prisoner in the USSR,” she said.  “I want to help rescue him.”

“Aw, you’re doing it for love,” said Dottie.  “That’s cute.  So what makes you think I have any idea where to find him?”

“Because the same place that made us is also working on him,” said Kay.  “He’s part of the Winter Soldier program.”

“And you don’t know where to find that?” Dottie asked suspiciously.

“My information is out of date,” Kay replied.

“I promise,” said Peggy.  “I will not return you to your masters.  I’m not sure what I am going to do with you, but I know to give you back to them would mean your death.”

“Oh, no,” Dottie shook her head.  “It would be way worse than that.”

“I will rescue Sergeant Barnes, and you two may do what you wish with this Red Room and the people in it,” Peggy said.  “But I promise that when I leave Russia again, I will take you with me.”

“What happens if I refuse?” asked Dottie.  “Are you going to send me back to jail to have you hanged for treason, Peggy? I know you’re not going to kill me… that’s not your style.”

“No, but it’s mine,” said Kay.  “And I doubt she’ll shed a single tear.”  She took out a pocket knife.  “I know you’re thinking of how you’re going to run away, or how you’re going to betray us both, but keep in mind.  I know all your moves.  I know all your hiding places.  There is nothing you can do, and nowhere you can go, that I cannot anticipate.  Do you understand?”

“Oh, yes,” Dottie said.  “I understand perfectly.”

“Do you agree, then?  You will help Peggy to find Sergeant Barnes, and in return I will help you to destroy the Red Room?”

“Absolutely,” said Dottie.

Peggy knew they couldn’t trust her, and realized she was counting on Kay to make sure they could keep Dottie under control.  Kay had asked Peggy to trust her, hadn’t she?  Now there was no choice.  Was there a chance this still might turn around?  That Kay might turn out to be the enemy after all?

It didn’t matter.  Peggy was already in this too deep.  Sunk Cost might have been a fallacy, but when the cost involved was one’s freedom and reputation, there wasn’t much to be done.

“It’s a deal, then,” said Kay, and started cutting the tape off Dottie.

“So,” said Dottie, entirely too casual.  “It’s Kay, is it?”

“It is,” said Kay.  “And what are you calling yourself these days, Olga?”

“Not Olga,” Dottie replied.  “Olga Barynova died years ago.  I like the name Peggy uses for me.  After all, I am quite dotty, and I tend to do things under the table.”  She looked at Peggy and smiled.

Peggy did not smile back.

“Then that’s what we’ll call you,” said Kay.  She finished cutting the tape, and began peeling it off.  “You’re hungry and dehydrated after being in that trunk all night.  Come inside and we’ll give you something to eat.”  They’d saved some of their own breakfast for her.  “And you can tell us everything you know about the Winter Soldiers.”

“Ah-ah-ah,” Dottie wagged a finger.  “I’m not stupid.  I’m not telling you anything until you’ve held up your end of the bargain. When we’re in Russia and haven’t been caught, then I’ll tell you where we’re going.”

Peggy would have protested, but Kay just shrugged.  “That sounds fair,” she said.

“And how are we supposed to know what part of Russia we’re going to?” asked Peggy.

“That I can tell you after breakfast,” Dottie said.  “Don’t worry about money, I’ve got some stashed away for the occasion.  Now where’s that food.  I’m starving.”

The two women sat and watched Dottie eat her breakfast, and Peggy’s misgivings only increased.  Talking to Dottie had reminded her rather sharply that Kay was a master manipulator… she’d manipulated Peggy when Kay had been the one in prison, and now she’d managed to play Dottie, too, something Peggy would have thought was next to impossible.  Now it was her, of all people, whom Peggy had to trust with her life, because the only alternatives were jail or Dottie.

Somewhere along the line she’d made a terrible mistake.  In fact, the longer this went on, the more Peggy was sure the whole thing had been a series of terrible mistakes, right back to…

… well, no.  Not staying in New York wasn’t a mistake, because if she’d done that, Steve would still be frozen in the arctic ice right now.  And anything she’d done after that… no, there was really no point at which she could have extracted herself from this and not gotten in trouble for it. Not unless she was willing to admit that getting Steve back at all was a mistake, and she couldn’t possibly say that. Or could she?  When Kay had told her outright that this wasn’t how history was ‘supposed’ to go, maybe it was a mistake.

It didn’t matter now, did it?  The future was already changed, and they couldn’t go back and fix it.

Dottie devoured the breakfast they’d set out for her without the slightest thought of table manners, stuffing so much in her mouth that Peggy was afraid she’d choke.  Once she’d satisfied her hunger, she asked for some twigs from the woods.  Peggy sat with her while Kay brought back an armful they’d already gathered up, intending to use them as kindling.  Dottie selected the ones she liked the shapes of, and arranged them into a map of the USSR.

“We won’t get in from the west,” she said.  “They watch that too closely.  To go from the east, we’d have to pass over Chinese airspace and that’s just as risky. From the south we’ve got the Himalayas blocking the way, and I don’t think any of us are crazy enough to try to go from the north.  Not even me.” Dottie glanced up at her companions and smiled as if this were a very funny joke.

Peggy did not smile back, but Kay chuckled a little.

“The way in,” Dottie went on, “is through Turkey.  The area is mountainous and difficult to patrol, but the locals know their way around I have some things prepared.  It’ll be a long hike, but we can take the train from Tbilisi to Stalingrad…”

“Volgograd,” said Kay under her breath.

“… and from there, I’ll tell you where we’re going next,” said Dottie.

“Mm-hm,” said Peggy.  It seemed straightforward enough, though Dottie was right – it would be a very long walk through some hostile terrain.  “You said we’ll need that money you mentioned… where have you got that squirreled away?”

“Nevada,” said Dottie.  “Joseph’s hanging on to it for me.”

The first Joseph Peggy thought of who might have anything to do with Dottie Underwood was Josef Stalin, but that could not possibly be right.  “Who is Joseph?”

“Joseph Strieber.”

It took a moment for Peggy to remember who that was, and then it seemed almost as unlikely as Stalin – perhaps more so.  “The Governor of Nevada?” she asked.  “He’s the one who wants you caught!  The mafia is breathing down his neck after you robbed the Toucan Hotel!”

“Plausible deniability,” said Dottie.  “If he’s the one shouting that I need to be in prison, the mob won’t realize that he’s the one who let me into the Toucan at their grand opening.  I was his date for the evening.”  She smiled.  “And now I can make him do anything I want.”

“So we’re going to Carson City,” said Kay.

Peggy thought she’d better make sure Governor Strieber didn’t get a look at her during this visit… she had enough problems right now without a desperate politician getting any leverage over her.  “Then we need to catch up with Steve,” she added.

“Steve?”  Dottie cocked her head and smiled.  “We’re taking Captain America with us?”

“It’s his friend we’re rescuing,” said Peggy.

“Well, if you’d told me that from the beginning, I might have agreed to help without all the threats!” said Dottie, delighted.  “He’s a dish, isn’t he?”

“So people say,” Peggy said.  People who’d never met Steve, and didn’t realize that he was so much more than that.  But she had another worry now, she realized… Dottie liked to know people’s weaknesses, and now she already knew what Peggy’s was.

[nazghoulz]

The Definitive Ranking of Richard Armitage’s Acting Roles, Rated Exclusively by How Hot I Find Him In Screengrabs

Richard Armitage. As a diehard Thorin Oakenshield fan I certainly have a complicated relationship with him, mainly because I can never decide if I find him inherently hot or not. On the one hand, I’m a hardcore Thorinfucker. On the other hand my gay ass sees a headshot of Mr. Armitage and I’m just like, “Oh, no thank you.” So in order to set myself to rights, I have gone through Mr. Armitage’s IMDB and done a definitive ranking of all his 44 screen roles on there, based completely and arbitrarily on how hot I find him in screenshots. (Thank you to all the hardcore Armitage Fuckers who keep wordpress blogs with screengrabs of his various cameos and bit parts; my respect for you cannot be put into words.) I haven’t seen like 90% of these properties, and I didn’t bother to research them, so these are mainly just gut first impressions. I hope this helps anyone else out there who as confused by him as I am. Enjoy ?

44. Father Quart in The Seville Communion/The Man From Rome (2020)   — ??/10

I don’t think this movie is out yet? Idk I haven’t been able to find any stills of him, let alone much information about the movie itself. It’s listed on his IMDB though! And apparently he’s playing a priest...which could be extremely  👁️👁️ if done correctly.

43. Unnamed Naboo Fighter Pilot in Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace (1999) — 1/10

OH SWEETIE NO!!!!! This physically pains me to say this, because I unironically love this terrible movie with my whole heart, but unlike a yung Kiera Knightley’s role (pictured front and center) as Padmé’s loyal body double Sabé, this is probably a cameo that we would all like to forget about. The only thing Richard has to offer is this unfortunate turtle-faced realness. This helmet does him no favors.

42. Man in Pub in Boon (1992) — 2/10

As far as I know this is Richard’s first acting credit on IMDB, and he for sure is working the background extra energy. Go on girl give us nothing! He does have a decent backside though, and it’s better than looking at unfortunate turtle face, so I give this one a 2.

41. Paul Andrews in Between the Sheets (2003)  — 2/10

I can’t really articulate why, but I absolutely despise every screenshot I see of Richard Armitage in this role. He is completely unhot, and not even in a way I can laugh at. He takes no advantage of his assets, he has no charisma, no magnetism, no nothing. This is Richard Armitage at his most white bread rando, in a way that makes me actively dislike him. Pbbbbttth. Bad. Throw this whole thing away.

40. Craig Parker in Casualty (2001)  — 2/10

I don’t know, it’s like the perfect storm of the gelled 2001 hair, the terrible quarter? eighth? zip sweater, and overall, er, skeezy vibes that he gives off that makes him particularly unhot in this role. Perhaps not as reprehensible as Unhot Paul, but still. I think the sheer boringness of this has to count for something. Blech.

39. Dr. Tom Steele in Doctors (2001) — 2.5/10

He honestly looks like a villain in an early season of Alias, which... well. Quentin Tarantino was cast as a bit-part villain in Alias season one, so take that as you will. But at least he’s compelling here, which is why he gets half a point over Unhot Paul.

38. Steven in Frozen (2005) — 3/10

Get some rest, tall child! You can’t keep burning the candle at both ends! Also short haircuts do nothing for you, Richard. Styled like this, they just serve to make you look sort of like a sleaze.

37. Peter Macduff in ShakespeaRe-Told (2005) — 3/10

He honestly looks like he could be a guest star in Friends in this one, where he’s a guy named Jason who Ross meets in Central Perk where they find they have a lot in common. Ross introduces Jason to Monica and they really hit it off, but it all comes crashing down because while Jason is sensitive and writes poetry, he also thinks that the Earth is flat. The rest of the episode is trying to get rid of Jason while he becomes increasingly obsessed with Monica, and Ross cannot quite let go trying to prove to Jason that the world is round. Anyway. Macduff Flat Earth Jason isn’t quite as unhot as Unhot Paul, but he’s pretty much on the same level as Tired Steven.

36. Phillip Durrant in Marple (2007) — 3/10

Something about him in this image really makes me want to punch him in the face. It’s huge Peter Parker in Spider-Man 3 energy.

35. Young Claude Monet in The Impressionists (2006) — 3.5/10

I’M LOSING MY FUCKING MIND THE FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND IS !!! CARNIVAL BARKER !!!!! STEP RIGHT UP TO SEE THE WORST GOATEE IN HISTORY !!! I was actually going to give Yung Claude a 2 but the more I look at this terrible beard the more impressed I am with the boldness of this look, so I had to bump it up to 3.5. Idk. Just look at this. It’s incredible, especially knowing what kind of beard Armitage can grow himself !!!!!!!!

34. Heinz Kruger in Captain America: The First Avenger (2011) — 3.5/10

This is definitely the best looking he’s been so far in this list, but he’s a Nazi in this one, which makes him unsexy on principle. But do I feel a little something when he gets pinned to the ground by jacked Chris Evans with the above look on his face right before he swallows his cyanide pill? Can neither confirm nor deny. They are also truly playing into his inherently sinister bone structure, so I can respect that.

33. Percy Courtney in Miss Marie Lloyd (2007) — 4/10

Even including Yung Claude and Nazi Heinz, I think Nothing Percy is probably the weakest of Richard’s period looks, mostly because he looks like, well, nothing. He certainly doesn’t pull off that top hat like he does in North and South, and the secret to that might be the lack of sideburns. In this one he just sort of reminds me of the asshole fiance in Titanic.

32. Philip Turner in The Inspector Lynley Mysteries (2005) — 4/10

He’s really giving off bargain bin Hugh Jackman as Wolverine vibes here, if Logan’s energy was more “murderer in a Hallmark channel mystery” than “superhero.” Though, given what sort of show this is, that may be the point! Idk, this isn’t the worst. At least he has a decent haircut in this one. Still, I feel absolutely nothing when I look at him. He’s simply royalty-free stock music given human form.

31. Dr. Alec Track in The Golden Hour (2005) — 4.5/10

I could see how this conceivably be sexy in this role, but to be honest, he’s still nothing to me, sorry. He gets some extra points because he obviously worked out for this role and the hard nips through a white undershirt is a commendable look. I whole-heartedly respect Doctor Alec’s thottitude.

30. Daryl in Staged (1999) — 4.5/10

Speaking of thottitude!!!!! This is one cream-faced business boy that I can certainly get into! He looks like the love interest in a pre-Hayes code homoerotic thriller from the early 1930s. I’m sure that’s just because of the lighting and general staging of this production, but hm... demure. Love it.

29. Capt. Ian Macalwain in Ultimate Force (2003) — 4.5/10

Well, he looks like a character from M*A*S*H but with no charisma, or like an extra in The Great Escape who snitches on Steve McQueen to the Nazis. Also in half the pictures I find of him from this he’s wearing this terrible beret, which I know he can pull off because of a role that ranks much higher on this list. Whoever styles this man really needs to pay attention to what sort of headgear they put on him.  

28. Epiphanes in Cleopatra (1999) — 5/10

Speaking of headgear, you know what?? He doesn’t look awful here. A solid 5, perfectly acceptable. I think the helmet does a lot to accentuate the sharpness of his face in this extremely bit part, though the eyeliner definitely also helps as well.

27. John Mulligan in Moving On (2009) — 5/10

Mr. Armitage’s characters can really have potential when a production’s stylist allows him to wear scruff (IN A WAY THAT LOOKS NATURAL, LOOKING AT YOU YUNG CLAUDE). However, as it is with John Mulligan in Moving On here, he just sort of looks like a rando? They’re not playing into the inherent angularity of his face, which for me makes it sort of confusing regarding what sort of emotion I’m supposed to feel while looking at him. As it is, I’m just like, “Yup, that sure is a regular human man, right there.”

26. Smug Man at Party in This Year’s Love (1999) — 5/10

This is the face of a man who less smug and is more DRUNK OUT OF HIS MIND !!!! Idk. He’s cute here, I’ll admit. That’s all I have to say about it.

25. John Standring in Sparkhouse (2002) — 5.5/10

I enjoy the bold choice of giving him wavy hair in this one, but I’m not sure he quite pulls it off. It doesn’t look bad, per se, just... he looks completely nonthreatening. Which I guess could be someone’s thing, but not mine. He honestly looks like a knock-off Will Graham, sans dogs and trauma.

24. Gary in Into the Storm (2014) — 5.5/10

I think the thing that really gets me is that this character’s name is Gary. Who on God’s green Earth looks at Richard Armitage and goes, “Ah yes, you do look like a Gary” ??? I don’t think I know of a single non-American Gary, especially since the name Gary only got popularized after Gary Cooper renamed himself after his hometown of Gary, Indiana!!!! It wasn’t really a name for human men before that!!!! I want to live in the alternate universe where Frank Cooper was originally from Albuquerque and named himself Albuquerque Cooper and this character is named as such. Gary. Really.

23. King Oleron in Alice Through the Looking Glass (2016) — 5.5/10

I truly hate how much his facial expressions in these stills remind me of Thorin, considering how bad he looks otherwise. Like his face his fine, I guess, especially since this is the first instance of his full beard. I’m charmed despite myself! Take me to wonderland, O King.

22. Adam Price in The Stranger (2020) — 5.5/10

For as compelling as people call this series, Richard here isn’t very much so imo. But despite my utter lack of interest, he doesn’t look bad per se. He just sort of has that stubbly white man blandness that colors a lot of his more recent roles. Like, at least his bad mid-2000′s styling had character. This is just the visual representation of a vague handwave.

21. Harry Kennedy in The Vicar of Dibley (2006)  — 6/10

Gosh... floppy hair, cute sweaters... he also seems to be smiling a lot in this one, which is nice! The only thing I have to complain about is that he looks very much like if Bradley Cooper and Hugh Jackman circa Kate and Leopold had a baby, which may not necessarily be too much of a bad thing, but I can’t unsee it.

20. Sgt. John Porter in Strike Back (2010)  — 6/10

Ah, back to poorly suited haircuts. At least he’s a little bit gritter and grimier than we’ve seen so far, and I will say Richard Armitage does look good covered in dirt, as we will see later on. Also he’s got biceps in this one, which, hell yeah.

19.  Ricky Deeming in Inspector George Gently (2007)  — 6/10

I’M HAVING THE HARDEST TIME RIGHT NOW RANKING THIS ONE BC OF THIS INCREDIBLE LITTLE WHITE SCARF-RIDING LEATHERS COMBO!!! WHICH ABSOLUTE GENIUS DECIDED THIS!!!! EVERY SCREENSHOT OF HIM IN HIS EPISODE HAS THIS!!! Part of me just wants to give Stylish Ricky a big fat 10 because I’m gay and adore the sheer audacity of this look, but I still have to be fair and rank his overall aura accordingly. I think he’s a handsome extremely gay-coded motorcycle lad in this one, but he doesn’t exactly rev my engine, so to speak.

18. Lucas North in Spooks (2008) — 6/10

The tattoos really spice this one up. Luke could have been plagued by the problems inherent in Regular Mulligan’s Moving On styling, but this guy has an edge to him. He has a good haircut and 5′ o’clock shadow, which is something I’ve figured out is integral to Armitage Hotness. I feel like if I got to know this character I could possibly find him sexy.

17. Raymond de Merville in Pilgrimage (2017) — 6.5/10

Speaking of bad haircuts, this one is his undoing. This is almost the perfect balance between full beard and short haircut, which is the only way a short haircut works on this man, but they ruined it with this one! They gave him a bad bowl fade, which completely undoes any inherent sexiness that comes with being a knight. Not even the fact that he’s covered in dirt can turn me on at this point, ugh. Guy of Gisbourne he is not!!!

16. Tom Calahan in Brain on Fire (2016) — 6.5/10

Oh hell yes, WELCUM 2 DA DILF ZONE!!! I’m not super duper thrilled with the looks I’ve seen from this movie, but he seems scruffy and comfy in a way that is slightly refreshing for ol’ Richard. This is certainly the best of his normie looks so far. I’m just sad it took them 24 years to figure out how to style him properly for sympathetic roles in a contemporary setting.

15. James in My Zoe (2019) — 6.5/10

It’s another DILF look, slightly edgier than Comfy Tom but none of that sexy tired energy that we’ll see from Ocean’s 8. I don’t know !! Jimmy here doesn’t exactly thrill me, I think I prefer Tom’s flannels to this sharp bomber jacket/white t shirt combo seen here. Oh well! I am extremely  👀 👀 👀 👀 👀 that he can just casually palm that soccer ball like that.

14. John Thornton in North & South (2004)  — 7/10

Alright. I’m sorry. I just don’t find him that hot in this role. Like yeah, he’s got the scruff and the sideburns that work to his advantage, and the setting does make this character inherently sexy, but in some screenshots he screams too much of an aforementioned Kate and Leopold (the best Meg Ryan movie, imo) era Hugh Jackman to me. And if I was particularly into that, I would just watch Kate and Leopold again. I will admit, however, that this rating could be subject to change if I actually took the time to watch this show.

13. Chop in Urban and the Shed Crew (2015) — 7/10

...I’M??? INTO IT??? He’s dirty and scruffy but also has kind eyes.... I feel like this is knock off Will Graham who has blossomed into his own. His run down, grime-covered own. He’s back edging into Bradley Cooper territory, but somehow it works for him in this one. Like, I’m 89% sure it’s the DILF vibes I’ve been getting from the other screengrabs I’ve seen of this role, and this particular flavor of DILF is way sexier than Jimmy or Comfy Tom.

12. Francis Dolarhyde in Hannibal (2015) — 7/10

His Caesar cut doesn’t bother me quite so much in this, probably because he is pretty explicitly playing a villain in a series that doesn’t have any basis in reality. A villain who is ripped, and who can effortlessly throw real Will Graham around. Armitage uses his inherent sinisterness to great effect as the Red Dragon, which is good actually! I think a lot of how hot he is in any particular role really depends on whether the styling allows him to play to his strengths...idk! I’m not usually a huge fan of clean shaven Armitage, but it works for Frank here.

11. Daniel Miller in Berlin Station (2016) — 7/10

As much as I adore this particular look (beard + fade + green army jacket), I have to compromise and give Danny a 7/10 because it seems like the first season they styled him in usual stubbly white man blandness. I’d say screengrabs from s1 are a solid 6, while this might be an 8, so the average is a 7. That’s all I have to say about this!

10. Claude Becker in Ocean’s 8 (2018) — 7.5/10

!!!!! I love him in this role, I about had a conniption in the theater because I absolutely was not expecting him!! He looks perfectly ruffled and scruffy, edgier than either Comfy Tom or Jimmy, which I’m very into. That plus his two borzois (objectively the best looking dogs on the planet) really put Old Claude over the top for me. Thank you, thank you Hollywood stylists for finally figuring out what to do with him for roles as a Normal Man.

9. Richard Hall in The Lodge (2019) — 7.5/10

I don’t know anything about this movie, but it seems pretty spooky, which I’m into. I think Richard is well suited for this sort of horror/thriller role, where his angular features can play into the overall vibe rather than some hapless stylist trying to work around them. He looks like another cozy DILF here but with a bite to him, like someone who would do anything to protect his brood. I mean, he’s teaching this child to shoot! But idk, he also has the potential for Jack Nicholson in The Shining energy, which I also could be....hm... into. Idk. Is this on Netflix??

8. Lee in Cold Feet (2003) — 7.5/10

FUN!!! FLIRTY!!!! OTTER VIBES!!!!! I LOVE THIS, he seems so goofy here, and Armitage doesn’t usually pull off goofy that well! I’ve giggled at literally every screenshot I could find from the four episodes he was in this show, he seems like a real himbo. I’m a huge fan, even if it comes at the cost of dehydration abs.

7. William Chatford in Malice Aforethought (2005) — 7.5/10

Hoo hoo HOO DO NOT JUDGE ME!!!!!!! Maybe it’s just because I’ve been watching the new season of The Alienist and the new dark and gritty HBO reboot of Perry Mason back to back, but sue me, I love the bold choice they made with giving him a pencil moustache here. He looks like a hot Howard Hughes; if cream-faced business boy Daryl from Staged is the young ingenue in the pre-Hayes Code thriller I cast him in, Bill here is the sexy antagonist. I desperately want to hear a perfect Transatlantic accent coming out out of that  mouth. This look fucks and I’m sticking to that no matter what.

6. Trevor Belmont in Castlevania (2017) — 8/10

Ah, yes, speaking of king himbos... do me a favor and look me right in the eye and tell me that you wouldn’t fuck Trevor Belmont. You can’t, can you?????? At least 80% of Richard Armitage’s inherent hotness stems from his voice, and you can’t tell me there isn’t anything sexier than thinking about letting that guy loose in a recording studio and letting him say fuck. Look, Trevor may be drawn that way, but it’s the absolute stupidity coming out of his mouth in that sweet baritone that makes me want to be raw-dogged by 100% pure Romanian beef.

5. Dr. Scott White in Sleepwalker (2017) — 8/10 

Much like I had intimated when talking about Hot Danny in Berlin Station, this is Peak contemporary normie Richard Armitage styling. I honestly think The Hobbit either awakened something in him, or casting directors finally figured out he looks way good with a full beard. His crew cut even works with his whole look, which is a miracle!!!! I think he should be contractually obligated to have a full beard in all of his future roles, but that’s just me.

4. Guy of Gisbourne in Robin Hood (2006) — 8.5/10

I honestly can’t believe I’m ranking Guy so far up here, but honestly, THIS RULES!!!!!! THIS FUCKS!!!!!!!!! Which is incredible due to Guy’s lack of beard, but I’m weirdly okay with it? Like sure, he looks like he’d probably call me a slur in front of his shitty friends, but he also looks like he could tenderly pound me into the mattress in a way that would have me questioning my commitment to the “no emotions” clause of our clandestine no-strings-attached sex agreement. Anyway. Guy of Gisbourne if you see this im free thursday night. please message me back if you’re free thursday night when i am fr

3. Angus in Macbeth (1999) — 8.5/10

HHHNGHGNHNGHGN HE’S SO HOT.....!!! HE’S SO HOT!!!!! Leather jacket!!! Scruff!! Dirt!!!! Flattering beret!!!!! He’s so hot, and the worst part about this is that this was filmed in NINETEEN NINETY NINE!!!!!!!!!!!! Which means we could have always had this, had stylists and makeup artists PLAYED TO HIS STRENGTHS!!!!! He’s so hot I’m getting legitimately angry. Without scruff and dirt this man is nothing. N o t h i n g.

2. John Proctor in The Crucible (2014) — 9/10

Look, I know I have a type. But... this guy is just so hot, Daniel Day Lewis please step aside!!!! Contemporary theater historians describe John Proctor as a “strong beast of a man,” and... hhhHHOOOGH HELL YEAH!!! HELL !!!! YEAH !!!!! Like, his dick got almost his entire Puritan village, including himself, accused of witchcraft and like, looking at this guy, I kind of get it. I would probably go to war over the raw animal beauty of this horrible dirty, greasy man. Sue me, I confess. I saw Goody Osburn with the devil.

1. Thorin II Oakenshield in The Hobbit Trilogy  — 9.5/10

Come on. You knew it was going to be this guy. Look at my icon for christ’s sake. I am completely biased, I cannot look at his pictures objectively. Anyway. Thank you so much for reading, this was a very stupid list.

[mostfacinorous]

Stoki Whumptober Day 27: Okay, who had natural disasters on their 2020 Bingo Card? [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9][10][11][12][13][14][15][16][17][18][19][20][21][22][23][24][25][26]

After giving thanks to their hosts-- and, Loki learned, Steve’s temporary employers, for he’d agreed to work in exchange for the room they’d used-- 

They were allowed to set off, though the hosts expressed their concerns for his health, and, especially the wife, expressed their pleasure in having Steve working. They tried to cajole another day’s stay out of them, and Steve looked to Loki, entirely ready to respond, but lOki, jealous and already aching for it, shook his head. 

“I’m afraid we’ve lingered longer than we should already; we’re expected, and running behind schedule.” 

None could argue with that, though Steve gave him a disappointed look, but he did not contradict his words. 

And so they parted ways with New Amsterdam and left the area, waiting until they were out of the developed parts and well into the woods to talk. 

“We could camp out here,” Steve opened with, obviously hopeful. 

“No, as I said, I am using too much of your life as it is, taking too much time from you. We go forward today.” 

Steve’s lips thinned into a near-frown. 

“I hate having to scrape you off the ground every time we do this.” He said, words tight. 

Loki stiffened. 

“I apologize for being such a burden.” He spat, feeling wounded. It felt like a judgement-- he ought to be better than this. The problem was, he agreed. This should not affect him so, and it felt like weakness, allowing the stone to wreck him so thoroughly. 

“Loki…” Steve said, his name sounding like a warning before a sigh came from Steve’s lips. “That’s not what I mean. You have to know that.”

Loki glanced away. 

“I know. I’m sorry.” 

He looked up to find Steve’s brow furrowed, his hands shoved into the pockets of his sweatpants.

“Look, I… appreciate, I guess, everything you’ve done. You’ve kept me alive, when you didn’t have to, you haven’t abandoned me, even though it would have been easier…”

“Steve, stop, please.” Loki was not above begging. “This grand statement, this admission you want to work up to… it’s born of reliance. It’s born of fear. I don’t want--” He bit the words off. 

He didn’t want to take advantage, and he didn’t want some sort of pity or gratitude attraction. 

He wanted Steve Rogers, heart and mind and all. Not a Steve who had decided he was in love simply because Loki meant safety and a way home. 

Loki shook his head and pulled out the stone.

“I intend to take us back to our present today.” He said quietly. “This has gone on long enough. We’ve played pretend long enough, don’t you think? Our lives await us, in our own time, our destinies will not stop just because we have stepped out of the time stream.” 

And he was certain Steve’s destiny would be far from his, or worse-- destined to be his end. They were so much the opposite of one another, Steve so good and he so wicked. This would not end the way he wanted it to. And even if Steve got what he wanted now… Loki was under no illusions. Steve would come to resent him the moment his head was on straight and the rest of their lives was before him. 

“What? Loki, I thought-- you said that could destroy you!” Steve protested, his hands coming up as he stepped forward, hands closing around Loki’s hand that was holding the stone. 

“Better than letting me destroy you.” Loki responded, just as earnest. 

He wrapped his other hand around Steve’s wrist, and gave him no more time to argue. 

“Hold on!” He warned, before letting the stone go-- opening himself to it as he had never done before. 

He focused his thoughts on when they’d come from, the attack on the tower, the confusion of that night, Steve’s body crashing into his as the stone was activated. He held on to Steve with all the strength he had, and felt himself screaming-- singing-- falling--

And when they landed, the ground shook, upsetting the world around them. He could hear tires screeching to a halt and people shouting, could hear sirens and loud music, the sounds of a city, interrupted and shocked by that fact. 

They were back, or very nearly. 

All around them, the electrical grid shuddered and began to fail, New York City’s famous lights shutting down one block at a time. 

“Fuck Twenty Twenty.”  He heard someone grumbling as they flicked on the lights on their cell phone.

Close enough, Loki decided. He felt the ground shaking around him and closed his eyes for a moment, before realizing he was still standing, still holding onto Steve. 

He opened his eyes and met Steve’s, taking in the shock on his face. 

Loki dropped his hands. 

“It seems I was right: it was easier to do a larger jump.” 

“Easier-- Loki, Manhattan is all but blacked out!” 

Loki flinched.

Of course-- he had put himself above all those affected by his decision. It was exactly what he’d warned Steve would happen if he gained control of the stone, after all. 

Loki held the fisted hand out, and when Steve didn’t respond in kind, he simply dropped the stone at his feet. 

“I am sorry.” He said, looking up again, and into Steve’s eyes. “I didn’t know it would happen. I didn’t mean any harm.” 

That summarized all of it, he supposed. The whole adventure, Steve’s feelings, his own, the power outage, their return. 

All at once, he’d had enough of feeling like a failure. Of feeling weak and destructive in turns, fated to do nothing but be a burden or cause harm.

He opened his mouth to say more, thought better of it, and turned on his heel, beginning to walk away. 

Steve, however, grabbed onto him. 

“Loki, what the hell?” He demanded, voice warm and close behind Loki’s ear just like it had been when they laid together. Even though they had never lain together. 

“Have I not caused enough damage, Steve?” He demanded, pulling back and out of his arms, steeling himself against the disappointment he would see in his face. 

But Steve didn’t look disappointed; he looked hurt, and confused, and… and angry. 

“What damage? This?” Steve gestured with one arm out at the darkened city beyond. “You could fix it if you wanted to. I know you could. And you should. But this isn’t-- power outages happen, this isn’t damage the way you mean… what else?” He looked lost, and Loki hated that look on him. 

“I don’t know, sending you rocketing backward through time, trapping you into a frozen wasteland, nearly getting you killed, forcing you to take care of me while I worked to fix my mistakes?” Loki spoke snidely. 

“You saved the stone from Doom, you saved me from freezing, you got us both back here, at great personal cost, you’ve protected me and risked your life over and over again, and you think-- what, that I’m going to resent you for it?” 

“I think so, yes. And your friends will see us together and decide I’ve done something to you, and they will turn against you for deigning to think fondly of me. You think I haven’t seen as much before, Steve? I have lived so many times your years, and I’ll live so many times more after you’re gone.” 

Loki did not hide the hurt in his voice, even as a storm began brewing. 

“So what, you won’t give me a chance, because other people in the past have fucked up? Because you’ve decided you know how this will end?” 

“And what point is there in my staying, hm? I can’t help Barnes with the stone, and now you’ve seen what will happen, you see the destruction that using it causes. You won’t let anyone else use it, either.” The wind was whipping around him now, and he felt his hair stinging at his cheeks the same way the tears he would not allow to fall stung his eyes.

“Stay for me.” Steve called over the wind, his voice calm and strong despite the chaos around them. “Make the choice to do the right thing. There’s hospitals out there-- people who rely on power to breathe, people who need to see to be safe. We should help, try and get everything back online--” 

Above them, a bolt of lightning hit a tall building, and from that point, several more bolts split off, arcing over the city and beginning to restore light to the darkened buildings all around it. It was unnatural, powerful, almost miraculous. The work of a god. Thor had arrived. 

Loki nodded at the feat, the lightning’s brightness still clinging to the dark of the sky, even as the ground below began to glow once more. 

“As you can see, I’m not needed. You will always have better options than I, Captain.” 

He turned away again and fled into the last remaining shreds of darkness, hoping to hide from the Odinson, the Avengers, and his own feelings, all at once. 

This time, Rogers did not chase after him. 

Loki didn’t know whether to be sad or bitter or grateful, about that.

[fandomfanfics12]

We Are A Family-Part 27

Title: We Are A Family. Pairings: Steve x tony, Peter x Wade, Nat x Clint, Sam x Bucky. Part: 27/? Warnings: swearing, fluff, angst, eventual smut, slowburn. Summary: When Nat comes into the avengers tower with baby Peter Parker, the avengers didn’t know what they were getting themselves into. But now that Peter is here,Steve and Tony both feel protective over him. It doesn’t help that Peter hates everyone other than Steve and tony. But as Steve and tony raise Peter, they start to fall for one another. Will this superfamily work out or will it all turn to hell? A/N: All i’m going to say is that we’re in the endgame now.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Part 22, Part 23, Part 24, Part 25, Part 26

When tony walked inside the house, Chinese, ice cream, movie and tissues in hand. The boys were in the kitchen.

"Hey dad." Peter smiled as Tony walked in and Tony tilted his head to the side.

"I got dinner." Tony said and Wade stood up.

"I should get going. I don't want Al to worry about me." Tony's eyes looked Wade over and suddenly it seemed so obvious that he was sick; the bags underneath his eyes, the wrong skin complexion, the frailness of his body, his patchy hair. God, how had Peter reacted to the news?

"oh, well do you want me to drive you home?" Tony offered and Wade shook his head.

"no I'll be fine. Thank you sir." Wade said and Tony frowned.

"it's really no trouble." Tony offered again but Wade shook his head.

"I'll see you tomorrow Pete." Wade said and Peter nodded. Then Wade was out the door and gone.

"Peter?" Tony asked and Peter looked down at the floor.

"I don't want you to freak out, okay?" Tony nodded and sat down on the kitchen stool beside Peter, putting the food down on the island.

"Talk to me, what's up?" Tony took his hand and Peter met his eyes. He didn't look devastated, he was probably in shock.

"Wade and I had our chat, and you were right. it wasn't bad." Concern flooded through Tony. But then, maybe Wade had softened the blow? Made it seem like it wasn't as bad as it actually was?

"And?" Tony asked, not wanting to make this situation worse by saying something that he wasn't meant to.

"This is the part where I ask you not to freak out, okay? I've known for a while now about this and I know you'll be supportive but it's still hard to say." Tony nodded and forced a relaxed smile onto his face.

"I'm not gonna freak out, alright? I know things haven't been easy the last couple years. We've gone through a lot, we're all we've got and that's okay. Because you're my kid and I love you, whatever it is, I'm still going to love you. okay?" Peter nodded and began to bounce his knee.

"Wade and I, we're kind of together now." this was the absolute last thing Tony had expected.

"What?" Peter's head shot up and his eyes widened. Tony's voice had come out angry, and Peter looked panicked.

"I've known that I was gay for a while now, and you promised you wouldn't freak out!" Peter exclaimed but Tony shook his head.

"It's not, I just, what?" he couldn't believe this. May had told Tony that there was nothing that could be done. Wade had months, months. And here he was, preparing Peter's life to turn into a total shitshow.

"Wade and I are together, I thought you of all people would be supportive about this." Tony squeezed his eyes shut. three hours ago he'd been hoping for this. he'd expected this, but now that this was happening?

"no." The word slipped out and Peter flinched. Was he supposed to tell Peter, was he supposed to keep this secret?

"No?" Peter asked and Tony gritted his teeth. He stood up and began to pace, Peter anxiously watched him. He wanted to protect Peter, he didn't want to lie to Peter about this. but he didn't want to break Peter's heart either. He couldn't forbid Peter from seeing Wade, not if he only had a few months left. To say Tony was between a rock and a hard place would have been the biggest fucking understatement of the century.

"Steve would know what to do about this." Tony whispered and again Peter flinched. But Tony knew he was right. Steve would know what to do about this. He'd be able to tell Peter, or he'd talk to Wade. He'd have a solution.

"Dad?" Peter asked softly, his eyes shone with tears.

"Pete I am happy for you, really. I've been rooting for you and Wade to get together for years. Steve and I used to joke about it all the time, it's just..." Tony trailed off.

"just what?" Time. Tony needed time to think about this, time to figure out his next move. His plan.

"I'm gonna put a pause on the movie. Can you go do some homework for a bit? I promise we can talk about this, I just need to figure something out." Tony pleaded and Peter sighed.

"you're keeping a secret, aren't you?" Tony nodded.

"I'm gonna fix this problem and then I promise I'll tell you everything. Just trust me, alright?" Peter hesitated and then nodded.

"Alright."

-

Three hours passed and Tony hadn't called for Peter. Peter couldn't sit still. Couldn't focus on his homework. Not when all he could think about was how poorly his dad had taken the situation. Steve would know what to do about this. God, every time his dads mentioned each other, it sent shockwaves through Peter's body. Back to a time when things had been normal. Before the fights and the broken furniture, before the divorce. Peter's mind flashed back to the wedding, how frantic his pops had been, how desperately he'd asked for Tony.

"what are you two hiding?" Peter whispered to himself and then the house phone rang. Peter ran out of his room but watched as his dad answered.

"Stark residence." Tony said and Peter stumbled. That was new. His whole life it had been "Stark-Rogers residence­". Peter watched his dad's face and knew that whoever had called, they didn't have good news.

"Dad?" Peter asked as Tony hung up the phone. He seemed frozen and his eyes lifted to meet Peter's.

"Put on some shoes and grab your coat." Tony said and his voice shook a little. Peter did as told and his dad checked that everything was locked and all the lights were off.

"Dad?" Peter asked again as he put on his seatbelt. Tony began driving, his hands shook ever so slightly. The nervous energy was enough to make Peter feel nauseous.

"That was the hospital." Shit.

"And?" Peter's mind was racing with lists of names of people in the avengers. But from his dad's reaction, he knew it was someone important. Someone close to them.

"And, uh, well..." his dad was stalling, and they both knew it. this was really bad then.

"It's okay, I'm not a kid anymore. I can handle it." Peter said and Tony tightened his grip on the steering wheel.

"It's Wade." Peter's brows rose and the whole world slowed down.

"I don't understand." Peter said and Tony nodded his head, his knuckles were now white on the steering wheel.

"I know kid, but we'll get this sorted. Alright?"

"what happened?" Peter asked and Tony turned a corner.

"Well that's harder to explain." The nervous energy increased and for a moment Peter thought he might actually be sick.

"Spit it out." Peter ground out and Tony's eyes darted to Peter.

"Pete?"

"I'm fine. Tell me what's going on." Peter said and Tony sighed, eyes returned back to the road. The hospital was in sight now.

"Wade's been diagnosed with cancer. It's in his liver, prostate, lungs and brain. The doctors think he only has a few months left. That's what he was supposed to tell you tonight." It felt like Peter's head exploded. No fucking way. This couldn't be happening. Not to Peter, not to Wade.

"No." he whispered and Tony's hand reached over and squeezed Peter's knee.

"I'm so sorry kid." He whispered and Peter bit his fist to stop a sob from escaping.

-

Tony's heart broke for Peter. And even though things had been absolutely devastating with Steve-he wished he was here to support Peter. Steve would know what to say to make this better. Tony found himself thinking as he pulled into a parking spot. The two of them sat in the car for a while, Peter desperately tried to calm down.

"How long have you known?" his voice was small, weak.

"I only found out tonight. I called May to see what she knew and she met me at the Chinese place. I'm so sorry Peter." Peter nodded his head and took a deep breath.

"So that's why he was staying with May? So she could take care of him?" Tony nodded his head.

"Al wanted to, but with her sight issues she couldn't manage it. He's wanted to tell you, but he didn't know how." Peter nodded and unbuckled his seat belt.

"so is he..." Peter couldn't finish his sentence.

"He's alive. He collapsed on the walk over here. He's been staying here for a couple weeks now." Peter nodded his head and then got out the car. Tony got out, locked the car, and followed Peter inside of the hospital. May was waiting for them.

"Hey." She pulled Peter into a tight hug.

"I told him." Tony said and May nodded.

"He's okay. Just tired, he's asking for you." she told Peter who nodded.

"He's okay?" his voice wobbled and May nodded.

"Yeah, he's just tired. But he really wants to talk to you. this nurse will take you to him." She motioned to a lady hovering nearby. Peter nodded and left without looking back.

"How'd he take it?" May asked and Tony shook his head.

"Not well, actually, pretty well. As well as you could take this situation." Tony said and she nodded.

"Are you okay?" she asked and Tony took a deep breath.

"No. it's times like these that I'm reminded why I didn't want to do this alone."

"Steve would know what to say." May said and Tony nodded.

"He was good with Peter in the tough times, wasn't he?" Tony nodded and crossed his arms.

"Yeah. But you're good with him too." May said and Tony nodded.

"I know, I just, Steve had a way with Peter. In the beginning, Peter picked us. There was never a doubt in his mind that he belonged with us." At that May smiled fondly.

"I remember when he was just a baby, Ben and I had taken him back. I remember the look on Steve's face when he held Peter in his arms, and I felt so guilty for separating the two of them." She shook her head.

"I remember that day." Tony smiled as he thought back to when he'd been in his workshop. Steve had angled his body so that Tony hadn't been able to see Peter. The excitement at the three of them, getting to be together, even if only for a few hours. Despite Tony's newfound happiness, he longed for the ability to go back to that time, to be able to be that happy again. To be with Steve again.

But that would never be Tony's reality, Steve had moved on. Had created this new reality for them all. He'd told Tony that it had been a mistake to choose this life, he'd picked Bucky and that was that.

-

Peter felt like he was about to projectile vomit. Not just from his own tirade of nerves and emotions, but also from all the emotions of everyone in the hospital. The nurse led him to Wade's room. Which was practically bare apart from the record player and the Wham! album.

"Peter?" Wade was in bed, in a hospital gown and Peter's heart broke a little more.

"Hey Wade." He sat down on the edge of the bed and Wade smiled. The nurse checked his vitals and then left.

"Who told you?" he asked, staring up at the ceiling.

"Dad, May told him." Peter hated how his voice shook with each word.

"I wanted to tell you. there were so many times where I wanted to. So many times where I almost did, but you were the last normal thing in my life. And your life hasn't been great lately and I didn't want to add to that."

"You should have told me."

"When? Between your dads getting a divorce and the nightmare wedding, there wasn't exactly a good opportunity." Peter scowled and shook his head.

"You should have told me anyway. We could have figured something out." Wade shook his head.

"that's why I didn't tell you! every part of my life, it was all about cancer. My time with May, all we talked about was cancer. Whenever Al was there, it was all about cancer. There was doctors and nurses constantly fussing over me, all our teachers would pull me aside and tell me not to worry because I'm dying. It was constantly shoved in my face and then there was you. and all you wanted to talk about was my shit taste in music. And I know it was shitty of me to not tell you what was going on, but I just wanted a little bit of normalcy." Peter nodded, tears in his eyes.

"I'm not mad at you. I just wish you'd told me."

"Would you have kissed me if I had told you?" Wade asked and Peter inhaled sharply.

"Was that real? Or were you just trying to distract me from this?" Peter asked, unable to look at Wade.

"Fuck, of course it was real. I didn't lie to you, not when it concerned us." Wade took Peter's hand and Peter felt relief wash through him.

"Good." He curled up next to Wade, resting his head on Wade's chest. Wade wrapped an arm around Peter and they breathed one another in.

"Everything's different now, isn't it?" yes. Peter thought.

"No." Peter said.

"Liar."

"We're the same. You and I, we'll always stay the same." Peter whispered, he'd figure something out. His dad would find a way to fix this. and then they'd be together. Because Peter couldn't imagine his life without Wade. Whatever future he pictured for himself, Wade was there in it.

-

Long after lights out, long after Peter was gone, a man in a suit stepped inside Wade's room.

"Wade Wilson?" the man asked and Wade sat up in his bed.

"Who the fuck are you?" he asked, readying to press the nurse button.

"I'm a man who can help. My boss took a look at your file, and he can cure you of this." Wade rose his brows.

"Bullshit."

"I wouldn't lie to you about this Mr Wilson. We have an opportunity for you to get cured of your illness, but you have to come with me right now." Wade thought of Peter, his mind reeling.

"okay."

[duhragonball]

Dragon Ball GT Retrospective (2/7)

[Note: This was originally written on January 11, 2013.]

Still watching Dragon Ball GT and writing about it to ease the pain.  

I'm up to Episode 25 or 26 now.  I lose count pretty easily.  The part where Baby is about to fight Goten.  So I'm basically covering the Machine Mutant leg of the series.   After Goku's team defeats Lord Luud, they learn that Dr. Myuu was behind the entire Luud cult.  This is kind of contrived.   It's not that it's a plot hole exactly, but I think they played this card a little too frequently.   The result is a whole series of secret masterminds that feels like those nesting dolls.   See, in Episode 8, the Para Brothers steal a Dragon Ball from Goku, Trunks and Pan.   In Episode 9, we learn that they're a mercenary team hunting Dragon Balls in the service of Cardinal Mutchy Mutchy, the leader of the Luud Cult.  The Cardinal is, obviously, a servant of Lord Luud, which turns out to be a weapon under the control of the true leader of the Luud Cult, Master Daltaki.   When things go sour, Daltaki turns to his overlord, Dr. Myuu, in Episode 13.   So in the space of six episodes, we go through four secret boss reveals.  Five, if you count the part where Cardinal Mutchy Mutchy's whip reveals that it was the intelligence controlling the Cardinal's humanoid form.   And Dr. Myuu has his own secret boss pulling the strings, but I don't want to get ahead of myself.   Now, by contrast, a similar concept was used in Dragon Ball Z.    Radditz is the first villain of the series, and when he dies, he reveals that his even stronger boss, Vegeta, is on his way to kick everyone's ass.   When Vegeta is defeated, the next story arc concerns his boss, Frieza, who's essentially the top of the food chain.  And that's it.   Three levels of bad guys, revealed over the span of about forty episodes.   It works better, because you have time to process how awesome each guy is before they spring the next one on you.   When GT does it, there's no clear pattern to the villains.   Most of them are thinkers and manipulators, so it doesn't really matter who takes orders from whom.   They'd have been better off skipping straight to Myuu, since he's the only one with an agenda.  It's almost like the writers couldn't decide which one to use, or they deliberately crammed in too many characters in order to sell more toys.   Anyway, the deal with Dr. Myuu is that he's some kind of cyborg/synthezoid/robototomaton/mechan-o-dude who wants to replace natural life forms with his own robot designs, which he calls "Machine Mutants".   I'm not clear on what makes a "Machine Mutant" different from a robot or a cyborg, but he seems to take pride in the name.   The only Machine Mutant who's not on board is Giru, the annoying sidekick character who joins the GT crew early into the series.   For my money, Giru is the biggest slap in the face of the whole Dragon Ball GT brand.  All fans wanted to see Super Saiyan 3 Goku have an hour-long screaming match with Vegeta, or with a floating piece of candy, or a ninja tiger ghost, or whatever. What we got was H.E.R.B.I.E.   Giru is like Steve Urkel combined with Poochie plus Cousin Oliver plus all the House Elves in Harry Potter times the Robot from Lost in Space Divided by Suck.  His actual name is TK2006, but the GT Crew decide to call him "Giru" because that's the annoying non-word he says over and over and over without ever stopping.   TRUNKS: Well, what should we call this guy? GIRU: giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru GOKU: Hmmm... I don't know.   PAN: If only there were some distinguishing characteristic we could use for a nickname.   GIRU: giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru-giru TRUNKS: Well, he's awfully round.   Let's call him "Roundy".   It's stupid, like if they had done an episode about how they decided what to name Scooby-Doo.  If they hadn't called him "Giru", they could have used his two other favorite words, "Danger!" and "Pan".   Giru's super power is that he can sense danger but refuses to explain what it is or how to avoid it.   The only reason he gets to tag along is that he ate the Dragon Radar and assimilated it into his body, so if they dropped his worthless ass into the sun, they'd be unable to find the Black Star Dragon Balls in time to stop the earth from exploding.   Despite this, I still think it would have been smart to make a quick trip back to Earth to pick up the spare radar.    The one that doesn't say "giru" a billion times.   In fact, by Episode 15, Trunks proposes dropping Pan off on Earth to protect her from the upcoming conflict with Dr. Myuu.  He doesn't say "and let's get the spare Dragon Radar while we're there, so we can throw Giru into the sun", but I think it's strongly implied.  It's like going to the bathroom.   Trunks and Goku don't need to discuss using the toilet while they're on Earth.   It's just mutually understood that this will take place while they're there.   Anyway, the whole "Get Rid of the Two Most Annoying Characters" idea is just a device to have them bond in a Very Special Episode.  Pan is determined to prove her worth and maturity, so she wanders off on a desert planet to locate the next Dragon Ball by herself.   Without a Dragon Radar.     Or provisions.   Against all common sense, Giru not only find her worthless ass, but he saves her from a giant Ant-Lion monster too.   After that, they become best buddies.   Best, insanely irritating, buddies.   The next several episodes take place on the Planet M2, which the Machine Mutants conquered as their new homeworld.  Giru recognizes the planet when the GT Crew flies by, and he convinces them to stop and check it out for old times' sake.   Goku, Trunks, and Pan are quickly captured by the Machine Mutants, and Dr. Myuu plans to use their super-powered bodies to refine his Machine Mutant designs.  Giru is hailed as a hero, and everyone just assumes that he has been working undercover for Dr. Myuu this whole time.  The flesh creatures resist, until General Rilldo shows up to re-capture everybody.   General Rilldo is one of those classic examples of "GT-logic", the inconsistent rulebook the writers used to plot the show.   As a character, he's pretty straightforward: He's the leader of Dr. Myuu's forces, and he basically runs the Planet M2 while Myuu conducts his research.  He's also their strongest fighter, so he's basically the man to beat in this storyline.   When he first confronts Goku, he's furious that Goku easily destroyed the Sigma Force, a crappy team of toy robot-looking doofs.   As usual with DBGT, Goku's strategy against the Sigma Force was to fight them in base form and pretend to have a difficult time before finally blowing them away with a single attack.  When General Rilldo shows up, it's treated like a big deal, and for a moment it seems like the real fight is about to begin.   Goku even remarks that Rilldo is  stronger than Majin Buu, the strongest villain in the franchise to date.   I think what the writers were going for was to suggest that Rilldo posed a similar challenge to that of Buu.  Both were able to regenerate their bodies indefinitely, both were relentless and unyielding, both could alter their shape at will, and both had the power to transmute living beings into inanimate objects.   Buu could turn you into candy, while Rilldo could turn you into a metal slab that looks like Han Solo frozen in carbonite.  In either case, strength was less of an issue than stamina.   It's not about taking them down, it's about keeping them down.   But still, let's assume Rilldo's somewhere in Majin Buu's weight class.   That's pretty hard core.   Goku could only match him by going Super Saiyan 3, and he could only last for a few minutes before his body powered down from the strain.   So against Rilldo, his strategy is... fight him in base form.   Of course, Rilldo likes to hot dog it too, so they actually have an even match, but it doesn't really live up to the hype that this guy is stronger than the strongest monster ever created. By the time they finally get down to business, Goku transforms... to Super Saiyan 2.   Of course, to his credit, Rilldo wins the fight, but only by zapping Goku with his carbonite ray while he's distracted.   Still, you could make the argument that he's indeed stronger than Majin Buu... but we'll come back to that.   So Goku, Trunks, and Pan are all transformed into metal, and Dr. Myuu is gonna dissect them... except!   Giru does a last minute face turn and sets them all free!  Turns out he and Trunks had planned the whole thing out in advance.   While Giru pretended to betray the others, he secretly freed Trunks and let him sabotage Myuu's lab.   Goku and Pan had no idea, which is probably just as well, since neither of them are very good about following directions.  I still don't understand how Trunks and Giru came up with their plan.   TRUNKS: So you're saying you were actually created by Dr. Myuu, but your memory was damaged until we came within range of M2?   Well, maybe we can use that to our advantage... GIRU: giru-giru-giru Danger!  Machine Mutants very strong! giru-giru-giru TRUNKS: Yeah, I know, but what if you pretended to still be on their side?  That way I could... GIRU: giru-giru-giru Danger!  Danger!  Danger!  giru-giru-giru TRUNKS: Dammit, I know it's dangerous, let me finish.   GIRU: giru-giru-giru Danger!  Danger!  Danger!  giru-giru-giru TRUNKS: SHUT UP! You'd think that once the heroes take back the advantage, Dr. Myuu would summon General Rilldo and resume the battle, but this doesn't work.   I mean, he tries, but for some reason his goons are really slow about this, and Rilldo himself apparently has no idea that anything is wrong.   I guess this isn't much of a plot hole, but it just seems like a society of supremacist machine creatures would have better security and communications systems.  Rilldo claimed he could interface and control all the metal on the surface of his planet, so you'd think he could sense anything that goes on at all times.  For that matter, why didn't Myuu have Rilldo there with him while he worked on such dangerous specimens?   Trunks reveals that he knows about Dr. Myuu's greatest secret, a powerful Machine Mutant called Baby.  Again, this exposes the flaws in the Machine Mutant civilization.   They're all completely obedient to Dr. Myuu, and yet they spread rumors like any human organization would.   Somehow even a slob like Giru got wind of the Baby project, so once he told Trunks about it all he had to do was sabotage its life support.   Trunks explains that if Baby had been allowed to reach maturity, it would have been the most powerful menace ever.   Somehow, it wakes up anyway and attacks the good guys, but they defeat it quickly, and that seems to be that.   But, as Myuu flees in a spacecraft, it turns out that Baby merely faked his death and sneaked on board.  Baby kills Dr. Myuu and reveals that he created Myuu, and not the other way around.  He plans to deal with the GT Crew personally now, which begs the question of why he bothered with such a byzantine network of robots, cultists, and mercenaries.   Meanwhile, the GT gang raises ship to leave the planet... except that General Rilldo is still lurking on the surface, and he uses his powers to grab the ship and anchor it to M2 as they take off.   This is a pretty serious issue, since he is even stronger than Majin Buu, and he did fight a Super Saiyan 2 to a standstill.... Except this GT, and GT-Logic dictates that a bad guy is only strong until it's time to finish him off.   Goku, Pan and Trunks step outside the ship to fire a Triple Kamehameha (in base form, all of them), and that's it.   One hit and he's dead, even though he was depicted as an unstoppable liquid metal creature up to this point.   I looked it up on the Dragon Ball Wiki and it claims that Rilldo was vulnerable at that moment because he wasn't in his transformed state, and the combined attack damaged him too quickly for him to repair his body.   I guess I can accept that, but it sure seems like an anticlimactic end for a guy who was supposed to be stronger than Majin Buu.   If all it took was a single attack to kill him, why did Goku toy with him for so long?   Sure, he enjoys fighting, but his friends were in trouble (as far as he knew), and Rilldo even managed to capture him at one point.   It's one thing to play with your food, but this is just sloppy.   As Rilldo drops dead, Baby comes spilling out of his mouth, revealing that this last attack was actually Baby's idea.  He screams with rage as the GT ship flies off, but I could buy into the idea that he only pulled this stunt to eliminate Rilldo.  I don't see why he'd want to, since Rilldo would have made a handy servant, but Baby killed Dr. Myuu without much reason either.  In any case, Baby then sets a trap using one of the Dragon Balls as bait.  Unfortunately for him, the good guys see right through it, and he's forced to retreat again.   I'm not sure how Baby found a Dragon Ball or how he even knew what it was.  What I do know is that Baby eventually reveals he has a vendetta against the Saiyan race, so my guess is that he discovered the Dragon Balls while doing his homework on them.   Even so, he'd still have no clue about the Black Star Dragon Balls, nor would he expect that the Saiyans would come looking for them.  He sent his various operatives to collect the rest of the Black Star Balls, but even he wouldn't have known where to look.   Hopefully later episodes will make this clear, but its GT, so I doubt it. NEXT: Ass yankers

[ofstarsandvibranium]

Ringing

Fandom: Marvel (CEO AU)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Your boss, Bucky Barnes, is holding a New Year’s Eve party. You’ve both been dancing around each other for years and you think tonight is when you both decide to end the game.

A/N: it’s technically not the weekend yet so I can still write! no one scold me! also, yes this is really early for a new year’s fic but i can do what i want!

trigger warning: anxiety attack mentioned

Mr. Barnes had rented out an entire venue for the company New Year’s Eve party. Employees with their families and friends filled the huge room chattering, laughing, eating, and dancing. 

You, Mr. Barnes’ event manager, were proud of the outcome. Decorations of black and gold were scattered along the walls, ceiling, and tables. Everyone was dressed in their best, ready to ring in the new year looking like a ten, you included. You went for a gold dress matched with gold strappy heels. You felt confident and beautiful and you hoped a certain someone would notice. 

And he did.

Bucky Barnes’s breath was stolen when he walked into the venue an hour before the party was about to start. You were standing in the middle of the empty dance floor, holding a clipboard in hand, and making sure everything was finished. 

Because your attention was elsewhere, Bucky took the chance to look at you. The gold really made your skin glow. The makeup on your face just highlighted your beautiful features even more. Your brows were furrowed and you were mumbling under your breath as you went down your list. Bucky saw you as a goddess and he was smitten.

But you didn’t believe in relationships in the workforce. He remembers overhearing that when you were in the break room with his friend and business partner, Steve.

“-it’s unprofessional, Mr. Rogers. I don’t want my reputation to be tainted if I dated someone I worked with. If people found out, they wouldn’t value my work anymore. They’ll end up thinking everything I get done is because I’m involved with a coworker.”

Bucky watched as Steve shrugged, “All I’m saying is you two would be great together. You already work so well with each other.”

You shook your head, “It can’t and won’t happen, Mr. Rogers. No  matter how much you push it.”

It pained Bucky knowing that you’d never be willing to be with him. So he had to push away his feelings. That’s how he came to having his girlfriend, Dot. She was gorgeous and sassy and intelligent. She was every man’s dream...but she wasn’t you. But he had to get over you. That’s why he invited Dot as his date to the party. He thought it would make things easier. But it didn’t. Not at all.

_______________________________________

You were too busy planning for Mr. Barnes’ party that you didn’t even think about getting a date. But now that you’re at the party, you’re grateful you didn’t bring one. You were being pulled left and right about the food, the music, the tables, everything. Despite the pride you felt about the turn out, you were incredibly stressed and exhausted. 

It became all too much. You felt like you were on the brink of an anxiety attack. So you pulled your earpiece out and set it down onto a table along with your clipboard. You pushed past groups of people dancing and eating, to finally make your way to the balcony. No one was outside because it was too cold and snowing a bit. But you didn’t mind it. 

You leaned against the metal railing, its coldness striking through you and causing you to shiver. You looked down to see the twinkling lights and bustling cars of New York City. There was still a muffled pounding from the music inside, but you paid no mind. 

You gazed off into the distance, thinking of things to calm you down: a warm beach, a fluffy blanket, walking in the park, a nice cup of hot choc-

A cup of hot chocolate appears in your vision. You look up to see Mr. Barnes holding it out to you with a small smile on his face, “You looked cold,” he said. 

“Thanks,” you mumbled as you took the cup. You watched as he shrugged off his suit jacket and you immediately began to oppose, “No, Mr. Barnes, it’s really oka-”

“You’re cold, Y/N. Don’t want you to turn into a popsicle.”

“What about you?”

He shrugged, “The cold never bothered me anyway,” he sang the unforgettable song from Frozen.

You snorted and sipped some of your drink. The warm liquid immediately begins to fight off the cold.

Mr. Barnes looks at you with concern, “Are you alright?”

“Things got overwhelming in there. I had to step away before it triggered my anxiety.”

He nodded, “I understand. I’m like that too. I don’t show it, but-,” he points back to the party, “-these things always give me anxiety. Too many people. Too much noise.”

“Then why do them?”

“‘Cause it’s what people expect from me. I’m a rich CEO of a start-up company. Big parties are sort of part of the deal. Nonetheless, you always impress me with them. Everything is so organized and well-thought out. You do so well, Y/N.”

You give him a shy smile, “Thank you, Mr. Barnes.”

He sighs, “I really wish you’d stop calling me that. We’ve worked together for five years, Y/N. Can’t you just call me by my name?”

“Barnes is your name,” you quip.

He chuckles and hangs his head down, “You’re right, but that’s not the name I want you to call me. Call me-”

“Bucky!”  You and Mr. Barnes turn around to see Dot standing by the doorway looking exasperated, “I’ve been looking everywhere for you! Your sister’s asking for you. Your nieces are falling asleep so they wanted to say goodbye.”

“Alright, Dot,” he turns back to you, “I’ll be back.” he then follows Dot back into the venue to bid his family goodbye.

You don’t know how long you’ve been standing outside. Your hot chocolate has cooled down significantly and your nose is starting to feel a bit cold. You really should go inside, but you don’t want to.

“Hey, Y/N?” you look back to see your coworker, Clint.

“Yeah?”

“It’s a couple of minutes until midnight. Don’t you wanna come inside for the countdown?”

You shook your head, “It’s alright, Clint. I’m good out here.”

“Are you sure?” you can see he’s apprehensive about leaving you hear all by yourself.

“Yeah, I’ll be okay. Thanks, Clint.”

He nods, “Alright. Happy New Year,” he lifts his cup to you.

You lift yours up as well, “Happy New Year.”

You go back to staring out into the city, you could hear echoes of the excited chatter inside.

“Hey,” you glance back to see Mr. Barnes approaching you.

You look at him confused, “Why aren’t you inside?”

He snickers, “I should be asking you that.”

“I didn’t want to be reminded that I’m starting the new year alone. Your turn.”

“I didn’t like the thought of you starting the new year alone,” he says softly and his answer just floors you. 

“Mr. Barnes-”

“Bucky, please. Call me Bucky.”

“I can’t. It’s-”

“Screw professionalism, Y/N. We’ve been doing this dance for years now and I can’t stand it.” he takes your hand, frozen to the touch. He blows warm air onto it before setting it onto his chest where his heart is, “My heart has been yours since the very first day we met and it’s been hurting ever since. I know you don’t want to have a relationship in the workplace, but, please, give us a chance.”

“You have a girlfriend,” you breath out, not sure what else to say.

“Dot is...nice, but she’s not you. I like her, I do, but I love you.”

30! 

29!

28!

27!

The countdown echoes in your ears from inside.

26!

25!

Mr. Bar-Bucky, leans closer to you. He cups your face with one hand while keeping your hand on his heart with the other, “Please, Y/N.”

“I-”

“Buck!” you both look to the door to see Steve standing there, his eyes glancing from you to Bucky. He clears his throat, “Dot’s looking for you. She’s getting irritated so you better go.”

Bucky drops his hands and they roll into fists, “Tell her I’ll be-”

“I think I’m gonna go now,” you mumble as you set your cup down and slide Bucky’s jacket off you. You set it in his hands, “Good night, Mr. Barnes.”

Bucky tries to reason with you, “Wait, Y/N! Please don’t go!” you rush away from him and slide past Steve through the doorway, “Y/N!” Bucky calls after you as he throws his jacket into Steve’s hands.

15! 

14!

13!

As Bucky follows you through the crowd, Dot suddenly appears in his way, “There you are! Where have you been? Nevermind, we have to have our New Year’s kiss!” 

Bucky’s eyes try to follow you as best as they could, but with the crowd, it’s starting to become difficult, “Hold on, Dot, I just-”

“Bucky, what’s going on?” she asks confused, her attention hopping from the big screen to her boyfriend.

7!

6!

5!

“Y/N!” he cries out when he spots you. You turn around and his eyes widened to see you crying.

4!

3!

Dot grabs a hold of Bucky’s shirt.

2!

She pulls him towards her.

1!

And plants a kiss on his lips.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Dot’s lips might be on Bucky’s but his eyes are on you as you look at him one last time before heading towards the elevators. He immediately pushes Dot away from him, “I’m sorry. I need to do something.” he begins to fight his way through the celebrating crowd, just some feet behind you. 

His heart starts pounding in his ears as you step into the elevator, “Y/N! WAIT!” 

You look down and let out a sob as the doors close right in front of Bucky’s face.

[secretradiobrooklyn]

HALLOWEEN RADIO | 10.31.20

Secret Radio | Halloween special 10.31.20 | Hear it here.

Artwork by Paige, Liner notes by Evan except * means Paige

1. Sam the Sham - “Little Red Riding Hood” *

I had to make the case to Evan that this was a Halloween song, but I justify with the fact that 1.) this song uses the phrase “spooky ol’ woods” and 2.) many years ago, Sleepy Kitty played a festival on Cherokee Street that wasn’t a Halloween show but it happened to be the Saturday before Halloween. Recognizing our responsibility, we scrambled to throw together costumes and realized that if we just got a wolf mask and paws we already  had everything in our wardrobes to throw together the Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs LP cover drawing of Red and the wolf. Evan says he doesn’t like Halloween but it’s only because once he commits, he commits completely. One of my favorite moments of the night was spotting Evan that night, several hours after our set in the afternoon, having a completely serious and sincere conversation with a friend – wolf nose and paws still intact. This was pre iPhone days, but I tracked down an image and I’m gonna put it on our fake radio insta. Thus, Little Red Riding Hood is in fact a Halloween song. 

2. Roky Erickson - “I Walked with a Zombie”

Every year, reliably, Paige’s dad Ned tells us we should cover “I Walked with a Zombie,” and each year we somehow don’t do it. So this live version of the song is for him, just in case this is the closest we ever get. 

Halloween tag

3. Steve Martin - Little Shop of Horrors soundtrack - “Dentist!”

Sure, an alarmingly large and hungry, sharp-toothed plant is scary. But is it as terrifying as a dentist who delights in the pain he inflicts? “I thrill when I drill a bicuspid” — shiver!

4. Hocus Pocus soundtrack - “Sarah’s Theme”

Our definition of a good Halloween movie is way less horrifying than it is lightly spooky, so “Hocus Pocus” is just about ideal for our purposes. This is the sound of Paige’s delighted Halloween youth… though we also just watched it again. Holds up! 

5. The Beatles - “Mr. Moonlight”

Paige pointed out that this is essentially a religious song to the moon — a song of praise, devotion, and submission to a greater power. 

6. Quasi - “Ghost vs. Vampire”

I know that Quasi has had a long and illustrious career, but my fandom is frozen at this pinnacle of mystical bummerness. I learned so much about being creatively sad from Sam Coomes.

7. Rocky Horror Picture Show - “Sweet Transvestite” 

8. The Velvet Underground - “The Gift”

Didn’t realize this was a Halloween song until tonight. If Hitchcock is proper Halloween, which I vote a definite yes, then “The Gift” is ultra Halloween.

9. Bauhaus - “Bela Lugosi’s Dead” 

I feel like I have to say psychic hello to my friend Joseph Grady, who first introduced me not just to the coolness of Peter Murphy but to the allure of vampires generally. I wore my nails and my coats long. We talked about what the vampires were up to that night. We had some truly perfect nights together.

10. The Bitter Tears - “Murdered at the Bar”

An invaluable prize from being in a certain scene in a certain set of years in Chicago with the School of the Art Institute crowd — grad and undergrad. We all loved this song, and 15 or so years later, “we all” turns out to be a very specific and much-loved crew of people I miss and love. Except for Chris Shea, who I love and get to hang out with here in the city. This song is for him especially. 

11. Phantom of the Opera - Korean cast - “Point of No Return”

We had this epiphany accidentally. As I recall, we watched the movie version of “Phantom,” and I was distinctly not impressed, but then Paige put on the French-Canadian version and we were both fascinated by how different it was. That led us into Phantom Internationalé, wherein we just looked up versions from all over the world. It is amazing: each version is both militantly like and distinctly unique from the others. The Korean Phantom emerges as the most singular from among the versions we heard, and “Point of No Return” an emotional height.

Meet Me in St. Louis - “Tootie the Horrible”

One of the greatest Halloween scenes in the history of cinema in our book. 

12. Donovan - “Season of the Witch”

13. “The Dweller of the Cave” * I Found this tape at my parents’ house this summer while we were delayed in Illinois between March and whenever the van got fixed and we drove back. Rediscovering this tape may be why you’re listening to this whole fake radio spooktacular tonight. Hi to Stewart and Jill. 

14. Science Fiction Double Feature *

15. Dr. Who Theme Song*

16. Red Dwarf Theme Song* 

The previous 3 songs were woven into a medley for Sleepy Kitty’s KMNR Freaker’s Ball. It’s one of life’s great pleasures for a band to play Freaker’s Ball, we literally wound around a wooded road to find some Elk’s Lodge or something full of college kids DECKED THE HECK OUT in EPIC COSTUMES ready to freakin’ get down. Never have I been closer to being the band in the prom scene of a 90s movie than at a Freaker’s Ball. We met some rad folks through the KMNR scene, and if I’ve ever told you about my custom vocal pedals, Colin of CroyTone Audio was one of those rad folks we met one of those magical nights. Also, raise your hand if your love Red Dwarf!

17. Ghostbusters 

Paige: “I had this reflector, this flat reflector that was some scrap of something that Ned got from Honeywell. I would play Ghostbusters, and I was like: ‘This is a ghost trap.’ It was SO REAL to me. It was this flat reflector, like a bike reflector, and I would like, like, set traps. And I’d be like, ‘Don’t move my ghost trap!’ I would set the ghost trap, and it was like fishing for ghosts. But that was me playing. I would, like, wait. …I don’t know if it worked or not.”

“I’m not sure if this is me imagining this or not, but I’m pretty sure there was a day where I was like, ‘I feel like this trap’s not working.’ But I also feel like I was like, ‘But how would I know? They could be all inside. This is either full — or empty.’”

Vertigo soundtrack

18. The Fall - “Frightened”

“I don’t wanna dance, I wanna go home” — Fri-dund! 

19. Goblin - “Zombi” Title Theme

20. Karen Elson - “The Ghost Who Walks”

I think we got this record at Third Man Records when we were playing in Nashville. Sean’s new residence! 

Paige: “Karen Elson is tall, beautiful, an interesting musician, AND she has red hair. That’s crazy. What are the chances that you would have all of those things? Talk about a blue moon!”

21. Eartha Kitt - “I Want to Be Evil”

“The only etchings I’ve seen have been behind glass.” 

22. Jeffrey Lewis & Los Bolts - “The Pigeon”

“Old skies you flapped through are no more.”

We would like to give a heartfelt hello to Yona Schimmel, mostly out of reach for now. We mourn every missed knish.

23. Scott Walker - “The Seventh Seal”

Paige didn’t know this was a movie, she thought this was just a cool song about a guy playing chess with death.

24. Groovie Ghoulies - “(She’s My) Vampire Girl”

I love that he puts two Bazooka Joe jokes right in the middle of the song.

25. Black Sabbath - “Paranoid”

Sometimes you need priests to summon spirits. 

26. Fantasia - “A Night on Bald Mountain”

This is a song that seriously disturbed Paige when she was young. She thought that they did this whole demon thing every single Saturday. For me, it made such an impression that, when each of my young friends and I improvised who we were — “I’m Darth Vader!” “I’m a Cylon Raider!” my take was “I’m Night on Bald Mountain”! And I would open my arms wide and pretend that I was an entire sharp mountaintop transforming into a giant demon with wings, and I would always be the biggest and baddest and scariest creature of all, no matter what they thought. Bald Mountain beats Batman every time.

29. “Jump in the Fire”

Or as I say whenever the occasion warrants: “Jump in the show-AHH!” 

28. Rogers & Hammerstein “Pore Jud Is Daid”

29. Barry Adamson - “Something Wicked This Way Comes”

I cannot recall what brought this album to my ears… I suspect it was something I got in my inbox when I worked at The Rocket. This whole album is full of heavy musical grooves and heavy mental movement. It’s a rare pleasure in 

30. Screamin’ Jay Hawkins, “I Put a Spell on You”

This is straight-up one of my favorite recordings of anyone ever. And when I eventually saw it enacted in “Stranger than Paradise,” I was blown away by how fundamentally Eastern European it sounds. Every sound he makes with his voice creates new characters. 

31. The Shining, “Midnight, the Stars & You”

Happy halloween my friends, I wish we were all at an otherwordly dance together.

[junker-town]

Every Marvel Cinematic Universe villain, ranked from forgettable to iconic

Photo by Dia Dipasupil/Getty Images for ReedPOP

From Malekith to Loki, we covered them all.

All week, we’re having a little fun and diving into the world of the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU). The MCU exists thanks to endless battles between our heroes and the villains that torment them. Some of the villains — hello, Vulture — are fantastic. They’re well-rounded, they have depth, and there seems to be a method to their madness.

Then there are the other villains. Their backgrounds aren’t particularly explained, you’re not entirely sure what they’re doing — looking intently at you, Malekith — and motivations seem weak at best.

As part of our Marvel Week, we took the 26 primary villains from the 23 MCU films and ranked them from 1-to-26. Warning: THERE ARE SPOILERS BELOW, so act accordingly. Let’s get to it.

26. Ivan Vanko (Iron Man 2)

Be honest. The only thing you really remember about Ivan Vanko is when he said “I want my bird.”

25. Aldrich Killian/Maya Hansen (Iron Man 3)

This movie had far too many plots, and therefore far too many villains. There’s one point in the movie where it’s revealed that the Vice President is in on Killian’s plans, and then it’s not mentioned again. Surprise! Maya Hansen is actually bad. Surprise! The Mandarin is an actor! Surprise! The VP is in on it! I need this movie and its collection of villains to do a little less.

24. Zemo (Captain America: Civil War)

Zemo’s motivations are clear — he is driven by his rage and sadness over losing his family in Sokovia — but he’s little more than an accelerant to get the real conflict of the movie going between Tony Stark and Steve Rogers.

23. Emil Blonsky/Abominable (The Incredible Hulk)

The only really nice thing that you can say about The Incredible Hulk is that the fight scene between Abominable and Hulk is pretty cool. Tim Roth is high key the best part of this movie.

22. Kaecilius (Doctor Strange)

Dormammu didn’t have enough screen time for him to be ranked here, but we do get Mads Mikkelsen’s Kaecilius. The fight scenes are awesome, but I spent a lot of time wondering if he was going to start weeping blood.

21. Malekith (Thor: The Dark World)

Malekith? More like Male-kiss-my-ass, amirite? Sorry, trying to delete.

20. Johann Schmidt/Red Skull (Captain America: The First Avenger)

Red Skull is the most cartoon-like villain of the movies, but there’s still something about the first time he rips that Hugo Weaving face off. Also, being a Nazi gets you an automatic top-20 spot. This dude was evil.

19. Ava/Ghost (Ant-Man and the Wasp)

You could make the argument that “The Feds” are actually the villain in Ant-Man and The Wasp, but for our purposes we’re just going to go with Ghost. Ghost is visually a stunning villain as she phases in-and-out while simultaneously kicking serious ass. She’s not higher up on this list because she’s actually ... not a bad person and is instead trying to find a way to end her crippling pain.

18. Yon Rogg (Captain Marvel)

Wow, they really cast the MCU well. Jude Law is the perfect smarmy guy that you think is on your side til you realize that actually he’s a psycho and is trying to kill an entire group of people. Captain Marvel is more about the origin story for Carol Danvers and less about the villains, so not much to write home about with Yon Rogg.

17. Justin Hammer (Iron Man 2)

What a jerk. This guy just stinks. It doesn’t make him much more of a compelling villain, but he’s the perfect insecure guy that isn’t as smart or creative as his competitors. He brings on Ivan Vanko, gets him his bird, and basically lets a murderous mad man easily take over his whole fleet of replica Iron Man robots. His ambition coupled with the “I will literally do whatever to get that government contract” vibes moves him up this list a little.

16. Ultron (Avengers: Age of Ultron)

I might be alone in this, but I found Ultron far too boring to be a super compelling villain. He goes from zero to murderous in a matter of seemingly seconds, and he is really only saved by James Spader delivering a stellar performance with voice work. The movie actually gets better upon rewatch (especially after watching Infinity War and Endgame), but Ultron just doesn’t do it for me villain-wise. His motives felt rushed and under-explained, and there are far too many monologues.

15. Lieutenant General Thaddeus “Thunderbolt” Ross (The Incredible Hulk)

Don’t be fooled. Lieutenant General “Thunderbolt” Ross is 100% the villain in The Incredible Hulk. On the annoying-but-not-that-bad end of the spectrum, he’s an overbearing dad trying to interfere with his adult daughter’s dating life. On the other end, he directs soldiers to open fire TWICE in areas infested with civilians. First, they have an open-field battle ON THE CAMPUS OF A COLLEGE. In the third act, when trying to track down Abomination (a creature he helped create, mind you), Ross has a helicopter — with his daughter on board — shoot at what appears to be an apartment building in Harlem. This man would not only NOT be the Secretary of State later (he makes a reappearance in Captain America: Civil War among other films), he would be in prison for war crimes.

And this dude tries to arrest the Captain America side for not signing the Sokovia Accords. This guy sucks.

14. Mandarin (Iron Man 3)

They really could have done so much more with The Mandarin, especially considering they got Sir Ben Kingsley to play the role. Kingsley is really the only thing that saves this performance, going from a cruel, murderous terrorist to gassy, beer swilling fool in a moment.

13. Supreme Intelligence (Captain Marvel)

ANNETTE BENING IN A BOMBER JACKET!!! Bening plays both Dr. Wendy Lawson and the artificial intelligence being that rules the Kree, but it’s her turn as the latter that gives us some pretty intense evil. Let Annette Bening play more sinister characters, imo.

12. Ronan (Guardians of the Galaxy)

Maybe it’s because I remember Lee Pace as Ned from the quaint 2007 TV drama Pushing Daisies, but I loved this performance of Ronan. He’s shadowy enough that you still get that air of mystery about him, but he’s also just straight-up a mad man.

11. Darren Cross/Yellow Jacket (Ant-Man)

This guy literally goes into the bathroom at work, melts Frank into a small glob of former human, then WIPES HIM UP WITH A TISSUE AND FLUSHES IT DOWN THE TOILET. The biggest of yikes.

10. Obadiah Stane (Iron Man)

Obadiah Stane wanted to run Stark Industries so badly he helped orchestrate a kidnapping of Tony. Some good came from that — namely the creation of Iron Man and all the tech that went with it — but Stane also did some super dastardly stuff. The betrayal of a guy that looked up to you after his father’s death is one thing, but all the war profiteering is just too much.

Oh, and him yelling at and firing William Riva (AKA Ralphie from A Christmas Story) for not being able replicate Stark’s arc reactor leads to Riva joining forces with Quentin Beck in Spider-Man: Far From Home. It’s like a coaching tree of villains.

9. HYDRA/Alexander Pierce/Dr. Zola/Rumlow (Captain America: The Winter Soldier)

Those backslashes are doing a lot of heavy lifting here, and honestly this collection (HYDRA) could have been a little bit higher as they have a lot of tentacles (pun intended) in a lot of places. Robert Redford as Alexander Pierce is one of the best castings, and the “elevator scene” is perfection that somehow gets even better in Endgame.

8. Winter Soldier/Bucky Barnes (Captain America: The Winter Soldier)

IT WASN’T BUCKY’S FAULT. Cap’s best friend in the whole wide world, Bucky Barnes, was somehow rescued after plummeting from a moving train, frozen, un-frozen, and brainwashed to become a brutal assassin. While Bucky is a hero, Winter Soldier is a war machine (no, not THAT War Machine) that even murdered Tony Stark’s parents. Big yikes.

7. Ego (Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2)

The mystery around Peter Quill’s father spanned both Guardians of the Galaxy movies before we got Kurt Russell dramatically riding around on the top of a spaceship as Ego in Vol. 2. It doesn’t take long to realize something is super fishy, and that that something is Ego spreading his seed — literally — on multiple planets in the hopes of creating a part-god child to help him take over the universe. Quill turns out to be that offspring, but he is able to break Ego’s spell when Ego TELLS PETER HE GAVE HIS MOM CANCER. That’s messed up, man.

T5. Quentin Beck/Mysterio (Spider-Man: Far From Home)

T5. Adrian Toomes/Vulture (Spider-Man: Homecoming)

I don’t know what it is, but the solo Spider-Man stories have gotten two of the best single-movie villains so far. Michael Keaton’s Toomes is perfection as the arms dealing, jet-pack wearing Vulture, but the added depth of him being the father of Peter Parker’s crush is fantastic. They manage to establish him as a guy with a somewhat relatable story (he’s just trying to make things work!), and the car scene between Keaton and Tom Holland is one of the best moments of the whole movie (and top-10 in the MCU).

Beck is low-key horrible. Anyone who tricks poor, sweet, grieving Peter Parker is on my shit list automatically, but Jake Gyllenhaal plays it so well. All Peter wants to do is tell MJ he has a crush on her, and he gets duped into fighting battles and handing over Tony Stark’s glasses. If that wasn’t enough, Beck literally shoves him in front of an oncoming train and leads to Spider-Man’s identity being leaked.

He does give us J.K. Simmons’s J. Jonah Jameson back, though. That’s a point in his favor.

4. Killmonger (Black Panther)

It was really difficult to rank these top eight or so villains. All of them have intense back stories or more character development than we got in the early movies of the series. Michael B. Jordan’s portrayal of Eric Killmonger in Black Panther was fantastic, and delivered some of the most meme-able moments of a villain (IS THIS YOUR KING?!).

While the rage and hurt felt by Killmonger over his father’s death is understandable, his actions as the movie’s antagonist are brutal.

This scene is so powerful:

3. Hela (Thor: Ragnarok)

The long-lost sister of Thor has some serious family issues. She’s absolutely ruthless, crushes Mjolnir (and therefore Thor’s spirits for a bit), and has an admittedly very cool wolf pet. Cate Blanchett knocks it out of the park with her portrayal. Hela is horrible and evil and also kind of badass, which shoots her up these rankings.

2. Loki (Thor/The Avengers)

Ah, the anti-hero. Loki is a pretty terrible dude most of the time, but he has his moments of actually doing the right thing. He’s petty, jealous, and the most untrustworthy person in the MCU. In Thor, he tries to kill his brother several times. In The Avengers, there’s the whole opening a portal in the sky to let the Chitauri in to kill a bunch of people and destroy half of New York thing. Oh, and don’t forget about when he faked his death, pretended to be Odin, and was content to hang out on Sakkar with the Grandmaster without helping Thor escape the gladiator-esque games.

1. Thanos (Avengers: Infinity War/Endgame)

We get glimpses of Thanos’s lilac tinge in a handful of the MCU movies, but he’s clearly the pièce de résistance of the culmination of Phase Three with Infinity War and Endgame. Josh Brolin plays the genocidal maniac perfectly, even leaving some viewers after Infinity War saying, “you know, Thanos might have a point about how we’re destroying the planet.” He’s willing to kill billions of people on countless planets to get a little peace and quiet, and is the reason we lose a lot of characters we really care about.

Thanos gets the benefit of a multi-movie arc to explain the full extent of his cruelty, ambition, and willingness to do anything (including kill his own daughter) to achieve his goals.

[bookwormcheerleader]

i was tagged by @trevorfindsthestrals (LOOK i finally got internet access on my laptop again!! Sorry it took so long) 1. Coffee or tea? tea, i had my first cup of coffee on like thursday last week 2. Black and white or color? black or soft, but not pastel, colours 3. Drawings or paintings? idk, whatever is more moving in that moment i guess 4. Dresses or skirts? dresses because i never know how to match with a skirt 5. Books or movies? how DARE you make me choose, i think books, but i wanna make movies (potentially havent really explored that yet) so it seems like the wrong answer 6. Pepsi or Coke? i dont drink fizzy drinks 7. Chinese or Italian? definitely italian on an everyday basis but i LOVE chinese too 8. Early bird or night owl? its almost midnight and i havent started my reading for tomorrow, that counts as an answer right? 9. Chocolate or vanilla? chocolate, unless its a milkshake 10. Introvert or extrovert? introvert, i don’t really like people 11. Hugs or kisses? ive never been kissed so hugs 12. Hunting or fishing? aesthetics of hunting but uh with fishing you can not put a hook on the line and just kinda sit there and chill without looking like the animal lover that your family judges you for being 13. Winter or summer? yes. idk im probably more of a summer person, but i also really like the implications of winter in that everything has to die in order to be reborn, plus i can’t really breathe in the heat, but i also have poor circulation in my extremities so the cold sucks ass 14. Spring or fall? spring, i like the crisp air of fall dont get me wrong, but the rebirth and the petrichor after a spring rain with a crisp breeze that doesnt chill you is just so relaxing 15. Rural or urban? i grew up in the woods so rural but i need to at least be kinda close to a hospital to avoid panicking  16. PC or Mac? pc 17. Tan or pale? is this preference, cuz i dont have one of those, but i am so white that i was the same color as my cheer uniform in high school 18. Cake or pie? cake, i dont like pie crust 19. Ice cream or yogurt? frozen yogurt tbh, it jsut tastes fresher and less heavy 20. Ketchup or mustard? my brother likes to mock me for how much i loved ketchup when i was like 7 as if it was yesterday 21. Sweet pickles or dill pickles? i dont like pickles 22. Comedy or mystery? can we do a hybrid where its like theyre fighting crime but have no ability to act serious, cuz im basically writing a comic book like that with @spectralflutterbeast 23. Boots or sandals? i live in a colder wetter climate so usually boots, but i love sandals 24. Silver or gold? i like white gold typically because its often a mix, it has the matching ability of silver with the warmth in color of gold 25. Pop or Rock? i grew up on steve miller and journey from my mom and simon & garfunkel from my dad 26. Dancing or singing? all i can think of is my shitty karoke the other night, so uh dancing, at least i don’t suck more at that when im drunk 27. Checkers or chess? checkers is easier and i could probably actually win, but chess is more likely to hold my attention 28. Board games or video games? we used to do family board game nights (im currently holding the winnign streak for clue because any games played without everyone dont count) (my extended family is also obsessed with card games, its how we bond, we talk shit and play cards) 29. Wine or beer? wine if i have to have one of these, i dont like fizzy stuff ever so no beer but wine dries out my mouth 30. Freckles or dimples? i have freckles, and i love it when people have dimples 31. Honey mustard or BBQ sauce? i guess bbq 32. Body weight exercises or lifting weights? idk what body weight exercises includes but i have always liked lifting weights, its something im fairly good at 33. Baseball or basketball? BASEBALL IS THE BEST I LOVE IT, i miss playing it so much but its been too long for me to feel comfortable joining an intramural team 34. Crossword puzzles or sudokus? sudoku...i think 35. Facial hair or clean shaven? preference right, um stubble.... im not big on full beards (probs cuz my dad has always had one, seriously pics from when he was 20 we are the exact same but he has a beard, he says he hasnt shaved his upper lip since he was 16) clean shaven is nice too tho 36. Crushed ice or cubed ice? i prefer no ice, but if i have to i like that ice you get in hospital cafeterias 37. Skiing or snowboarding? never been 38. Smile or game face? smirking, its the happy medium 39. Bracelet or necklace? i feel naked without any piece of my jewelry (watch on right wrist, a bracelet on my left, a necklace for me to fidget with, both sets of earrings) 40. Fruit or vegetables? fruit 41. Sausage or bacon? bacon 42. Scrambled or fried? scrambled unless its on toast 43. Dark chocolate or white chocolate? dark chocolate 44. Tattoos or piercings? i have two sets of piercings and i just got my first tattoo last month 45. Antique or brand new? antique unless its something i would feel like i couldnt be comfortable using, i always wind up with a very eclectic mix 46. Dress up or dress down? dress down, never really have a reason to dress up 47. Cowboys or aliens? cowboys, space gives me anxiiety 48. Cats or dogs? dogs 49. Pancakes or waffles? depends on who is making the pancakes 50. Bond or Bourne? uhhhh what 51. Sci-Fi or fantasy? fantasy 52. Numbers or letters? letters 53. Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings? lotr tbh 54. Fair or theme park? fair, i grew up in puyallup (look it up, i can even sing the old theme song) 55. Money or fame? money, i want to buy my parents and aunt nice things 56. Washing dishes or doing laundry? laundry (no icky wet food pieces!) {this is what @trevorfindsthestrals had i just could not have said it any better myself} 57. Snakes or sharks? ummm snakes? cuz theyre smaller and i can run from them if theyre dangerous 58. Orange juice or apple juice? orange 59. Sunrise or sunset? sunsets seem more satisfactory to me 60. Slacker or over-achiever?.....i dont’ know how to answer this question 61. Pen or pencil? pencil, unless im worried about it smudging, then i bought some erasable pens for that 62. Peanut butter or jelly? peanut butter is more filling but i make jam every year so theres that 63. Grammys or Oscars? oscars 64. Detailed or abstract? why cant we do both, like a painting that is overall abstract but the closer you get the more you see the things that make it what it is, ya know, like life 65. Multiple choice questions or essay questions? idk multiple choice questions are harder to get wrong for not having enough info about a particular topic, but im good at and enjoy bsing things 66. Adventurous or cautious? i wish i was more adventurous but insecurities 67. Saver or spender? yes 68. Glasses or contacts? i dont wear either 69. Laptop or desktop? laptop 70. Classic or modern? what medium 71. Personal chef or personal fitness trainer? i would like a personal trainer until i get back in the habit of it and then i would jsut need a gym buddy 72. Internet or cell phone? cell since you cna get internet on your phone 73. Call or text? social anxiety so texting  74. Curly hair or straight? mine is beach wavy 75. Shower in the morning or shower in the evening? ive been showering in the morning because i like what it does to my hair 76. Spicy or mild? spicy please 77. Marvel or DC? wonder woman was my first favorite character, like about the time that bugs life came out because i obviously had two and the other was Flick  78. Paying a mortgage or paying rent? rent, i like assurance but i dont like permanence 79. Sky dive or bungee jump? never been but uh im not that trusting so i probably am jsut gonna go with a no 80. Oreos or Chips Ahoy? chewy chips ahoy 81. Jello or pudding? jello 82. Truth or dare? im a chicken so truth 83. Roller coaster or Ferris wheel? roller coaster, ferris wheels are all of the fear with none of the fun 84. Leather or denim? I NEED BOTH I CANT CHOOSE 85. Stripes or solids? stripes and fat people lol no, solids for me 86. Bagels or muffins? bagels probably 87. Whole wheat or white? whole wheat 88. Beads or pearls? pearls, my mother was a jeweler for 13 years, i cant not 89. Hardwood or carpet? hard wood in a hall, tile or linoleum in the kitchen and bathroom and then carpet everywhere else 90. Bright colors or neutral tones? uhhhh for what, cuz it really depends  91. Be older than you are or younger than you are? i want to be like 34, not rn obviously, im enjoying being 20 and stupid, but i feel like 34 is a good age, of course thats abotu how old my bros were when i idolized them so that might be reflective of that 92. Raisins or nuts? raisins, partially because every time my dad sees nuts he says nuts for the nutty and it has become a conditioned response for me now 93. Picnic or nice restaurant? picnic 94. Black leather or brown leather? brown 95. Long hair or short hair? mines somewhere in the middle 96. “Ready, aim, fire” or “Ready, fire, aim”? wtf does the second even mean 97. Fiction or non-fiction? fiction 98. Smoking or non-smoking? i have asthma 99. Think before you talk or talk before you think? i wish i could think before i talk more than i actually do 100. Asking questions or answering questions? i like to listen to people imma tag: @kiavachiisanoob @warriorsatthedisco @colecast1 and anyone lookinng for an excuse to do one of these

[imjustthemechanic]

The Price of a Soul

Part 1/? - Agent Russel Part 2/? - The Letter Part 3/? - Miss Lake Part 4/? - The Stewardess Part 5/? - An Assassination Part 6/? - Fallout Part 7/? - Face to Face Part 8/? - Deals, Details, and Other Devils Part 9/? - Baggage Part 10/? - Private Funding Part 11/? - Just Passing Through Part 12/? - Party of Four Part 13/? - Resolute Part 14/? - The Wreck Part 15/? - Body Snatchers Part 16/? - Out of the Frying Pan Part 17/? - A Miracle Part 18/? - A Matter of Circumstance Part 19/? - Nome Part 20/? - The Future Part 21/? - A Hero’s Welcome Part 22/? - Up to Speed Part 23/? - Expect Further Delays Part 24/? - The Welcome Wagon Part 25/? - Fugitives Part 26/? - A Reluctant Accomplice Part 27/? - Deja Vu Part 28/? - Interview with a Madwoman Part 29/? - Violence

Holy shit, another chapter!  This is the one where Dottie kills a buncha mobsters.

-

They did not fly to Nevada.  Kay had already been recognized on a plane once, and with all three of them together and all three of them fugitives, there was a greater chance that at least one of them would be spotted.  They got Dottie some clothes that were not a prison uniform, stole another car, and started driving.

“You know, I just realized,” said Peggy, who was at the wheel for the first part of the journey.  “We never did find the bomb on Howard’s plane.  Was there one?”

“Of course not,” said Kay.  “Why would I bother building a bomb when the threat of one would do the trick?”

“Because you’re a coward,” said Dottie.

“I’m efficient,” Kay told her.

“What if she’d called your bluff?” Dottie asked.

“She didn’t.  And even if she had, I wasn’t actually going to blow up the plane.  I needed it.  And the people on board it.  I would have thought of something.  You don’t have to kill every single person who inconveniences you,” she added, sounding exasperated.  It made Peggy wonder if that were something many of the Russian girls tended to do.

“Spoilsport,” said Dottie.

The journey had to be done in stages.  Peggy and Kay could take turns driving, but neither trusted Dottie to take the wheel, and they had to take turns sitting up and watching her during the night so she couldn’t run off.  Dottie seemed to enjoy the attention.  As far as Peggy could tell, she slept quite peacefully during the nights, and during the daytime she let her scarf flutter in the breeze with a smile on her face, and delightedly pointed out roadside attractions that Peggy and Kay refused to stop for.

While they drove, they listened to the radio.  The news talked about things like Burma joining the United Nations, and how the latter organization had established a special body dedicated to public health.  But of course, what Peggy was really listening for was Steve.  His tour of New England continued with cheering crowds all the way.  The announcers described him visiting soldiers whose lives he’d saved, and the widows of those he couldn’t.

There was even, at one point, an interview with him.  Peggy perked up at the announcement and Kay immediately turned the radio up.

Captain Rogers, the interviewer said.  Now that you’re back, what are your plans for the future?

I’m not sure, Steve’s voice replied, and Peggy’s insides twisted. He’d had plans… he’d been going to get married and buy a farm.  She was the one who’d told him he couldn’t do that.  I’m still in the army for the time being.  My discharge was issued on the assumption I was dead, and since I’m not, my service isn’t finished.

“Damn Masters,” Peggy murmured.

Kay thought for a moment.  “What if he got his tie caught in a piece of machinery and it strangled him?”

“Hush,” Peggy told her.

Have you heard the rumors that other countries have begun research on human enhancement? asked the interviewer.

I have, said Steve.  It was my understanding that everyone signed a treaty that they wouldn’t do human experimentation like that.

They did, the interviewer said, but there have been suggestions that America’s enemies think they need to find a way to counter you.

I’m not a weapon, and we’re not at war, said Steve.  When you’re not at war, you don’t need super-soldiers.

So you would be opposed to any such work in the United States?  Or only abroad?

I think, said Steve, that anybody who wants to volunteer for such a program needs to think very hard about what they want to get out of it. Even the people who worked on the serum didn’t know what its long-term effects on my body would be.  I think they’d have been shocked to learn I survived three years frozen in ice.

Peggy certainly had been, and Howard… but now she found her own thought. He’d crashed the Valkyrie fully intending to die.  He’d said he’d realized at the last moment that he didn’t want that after all, but that was before he’d found his plans in tatters.  Had he changed his mind again since?  Was he contemplating suicide, only to realize he didn’t know if there were anything that would kill him?

No, that couldn’t be.  Steve wouldn’t, not when his previous attempt was so fresh in his mind.  Not when he knew that the friend he’d intended to die for was alive and in need of help.

Even so, the idea stuck in Peggy’s mind, and made her feel a little ill. She couldn’t stop picturing him contemplating it.  She imagined him playing with a knife, examining a bottle of rat poison, spinning the chamber in a revolver, and wondering if any of them could do him irreparable damage.  A treacherous lump rose in her throat at the thought.

She wondered, too, if Steve were thinking about her while all this went on.  What with all the autographs and photo opportunities and such things, he probably had very little time to.  If he did, though, what was he thinking about?  He’d told Russel to trust her, so he clearly didn’t believe in the charges against her.  What did he think she was up to?  What had Masters told him?

For that matter, what was Daniel thinking about while he sat in jail?  He doubtless thought Peggy was working on clearing both their names.  Technically she was.  Freeing Dottie would doubles have delayed the trial at the very least.  But she was also thinking about Steve’s desire to free his friend.  He’d been so broken the day after Sergeant Barnes fell into the ravine… at the time, all Peggy had been able to offer was advice.  Now that she could give him an opportunity to fix that awful thing, she couldn’t just let it lie.

Neither Steve nor Daniel had heard from her since her arrest.  Did one or both think she’d simply run off with the other?

Well, to close this on a less serious note, the reporter said.  Captain, I’m sure what the women of America are dying to know is: are you looking for love?

There was a brief pause.  I’m not sure, said Steve.  I had a girl during the war, but three years is a long time.

You heard it here first, ladies, the reporter said.  Captain America may soon be back on the market!  Thank you so much for your time, Cap.  Pleasure having you on the show.

You’re welcome, was all Steve said.

Kay changed the station, and then quickly turned the volume back down again as the Floyd Hunt Quartet’s Fool that I Am came out just a little too loud.

“Aw, don’t love make fools of us all,” Dottie teased.

Peggy didn’t answer.  She had no intention of encouraging her.

- 

Upon arriving in Carson City, they had some lunch and freshened up, and then parked across the street from Governor Strieber’s mansion.  It was a very modest place compared to some of the buildings Howard Stark lived, but still represented hundreds of possible hiding places for a large amount of money.  Especially for a man who knew that no less a mobster than John ‘Moxie’ Blumberg would come down on him if it were found.

“How are we going to find it?” Peggy asked.

“Joseph will show me where it is,” Dottie replied calmly.  “He knows I’m coming back for it eventually.”

“Will he be surprised it’s so soon?”  A smart man would have set it aside to make sure it was there for her, but Peggy’s experience was that most politicians were not very smart where money was concerned.  If he thought it might be a while before Dottie came back, he may well have spent it… especially when Dottie and her ilk were so easy to underestimate.

“Joseph is easy to surprise,” said Dottie.  “It’s one of his more charming traits.”

It was very late, almost one in the morning, when Strieber’s shiny silver Packard pulled into the driveway, and Strieber got out.  He was a very tall man but also quite overweight, with a drinker’s belly that hung over the top of his trousers.  He was dressed up as if he’d been out for a night on the town, no doubt gambling in the new casino he pretended to disapprove of.  A woman climbed out after him and took his arm. She was a brunette, dressed in a pink and black evening gown with an enormous fur stole around her shoulders. The two of them headed inside.

“Forgot me already, Joseph?” Dottie clucked her tongue.  “You’ll break my heart.”

Once the door was closed, Dottie climbed out of the car and headed towards the house.  Peggy and Kay climbed out and went after her.

Dottie took them around the back and knocked on the kitchen door.  A woman in a maid’s uniform answered it, and looked startled.

“Miss Abagnale?” she asked.

Dottie punched her in the face.

They tied up the maid with an electrical cord, and found the short flight of stairs that led up into the living area.  Light was coming around the door at the top.  Peggy opened it a crack and looked out into a sitting area… lamps were lit, but she couldn’t see anybody.

The door suddenly jerked open, and Peggy found the barrel of a revolver in her face.

It took a moment for her eyes to re-focus from the dark ring of potential death to the man wielding it.  He was a skinny guy with dark hair, wearing a gray suit and hat and a green tie.

“Come on out, sweetheart,” he told Peggy.  His two front teeth were missing.

Peggy thought fast… no idea who this man was, but she couldn’t let him reveal that they were here.  She dropped to her knees to grab him around the legs and knock him over.  At the same time, both Dottie and Kay leaped on him from behind her.  He squawked in surprise, but it was too late for him to fight back.  Moments later they had him flat on the floor.  Dottie’s foot was in the middle of his chest, and the gun was in her hand, pointed at his head.

“Carbone?” somebody asked.  “What’s going on?”

Peggy swore under her breath – she should have known Dottie would lead them into trouble!  “Let’s go, quick,” she said.

It was too late for that, though.  Another man appeared in the doorway to the siting room.  Dottie shot him, and the second one who turned out to be behind him.  She kicked Carbone in the chin, and strode down the hall like a queen.

Peggy and Kay had no choice but to follow her.

In the sitting room, Strieber and his girlfriend were on a sofa, clinging to each other in terror.  Four more mobsters were standing around them, and Moxie Blumberg himself was halfway through lighting a cigar out of a box he’d taken from the cabinet.  All of them were clearly shocked by what had just occurred, and more so to see Dottie walk in with Carbone’s gun in her hand.

The one nearest Dottie raised his own weapon.  She kicked it out of his hand and shot him.  There was absolutely nothing for it now.  One of the others pulled out a knife and went for Peggy – she grabbed a crystal decanter of alcohol off a table and smashed it over his head.  Kay kicked another one’s legs out from under him and slammed his face into the floor, then snatched the revolver off his belt and shot a third mobster in the knee. He dropped, and Dottie shot him in the head to finish him off.  The last one lost his nerve and turned to run – Dottie shot him, too, and then she was out of bullets.  She threw the gun aside and snatched up the knife the other man had dropped.  By this time, Blumberg was pulling out his own gun, but Dottie threw the knife and it embedded itself in his gut.  He fell.

That left the three women, and Strieber and his mistress.

“Mary-Ann?” asked Strieber in a tremulous voice.

Dottie smiled.  “Where’s my money, Joseph?”

Strieber ran to the bookshelf, stepped over Blumberg’s fallen body, and pulled out a few volumes.  Behind them was a wall safe.  He dialed the combination in with shaking hands, needing several tries to get it right. With each failure, Dottie came closer and closer behind him, and Peggy could see the sweat beading on the back of his neck.  Finally he got it open, and stepped aside.

“T-t-there it is!” he said.  “Take it!”

Dottie pulled out several packets of bills and tossed them to Peggy and Kay. Then she shut the safe and turned to smile at Strieber.

“Thank you, Joseph,” she said.  “I knew I could count on you.”

In a swift motion, she’d gotten a toe under Blumberg’s fallen pistol.  She kicked it into the air, caught it, and shot Strieber in the neck.  His girlfriend screamed.  Dottie turned around, and killed her, too.

“Don’t!” Kay shouted, but it was already too late.

[marcusssanderson]

50 Letting Go Quotes For Finally Moving On

Looking for inspirational letting go quotes to help you make the tough walk forward?

One of the most difficult tasks any individual can master is the ability to let go of the past, and move forward towards their future.

There is a saying that depression is living in the past, anxiety is worrying about the future, and true contentment is living in the present. I know this to be true for my patients and in my work.

However, if an individual can learn to master the skills of letting go of past hurts and grievances they are holding on to, and to stop worrying about every possible case scenario in the future that can go wrong – then they can truly feel a sense of peace, and have a more successful and meaningful present, in all areas of their lives.

Below are some quotes on the ideas of letting go and moving on, that I hope will plant kernels of inspiration and grounding for your life. With this new found peace and lightness, great things can be accomplished, and your life can be more fully enjoyed.

Letting Go Quotes about Relationship

1.) “The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” ― Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

2.) “Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.” ― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

3.) “Sometimes it takes a heartbreak to shake us awake & help us see we are worth so much more than we’re settling for.” ― Mandy Hale, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass

4.) “Every woman that finally figured out her worth, has picked up her suitcases of pride and boarded a flight to freedom, which landed in the valley of change.” ― Shannon L. Alder

5.) “If letting go, if letting people and things work themselves out in the way that they needed to without your help was the most important thing, then it was also the hardest.” ― Deb Caletti, The Six Rules of Maybe

6.) “When someone you love says goodbye you can stare long and hard at the door they closed and forget to see all the doors God has open in front of you.” ― Shannon L. Alder

8.) “When we think we have been hurt by someone in the past, we build up defenses to protect ourselves from being hurt in the future. So the fearful past causes a fearful future and the past and future become one. We cannot love when we feel fear…. When we release the fearful past and forgive everyone, we will experience total love and oneness with all.” ― Gerald G. Jampolsky

9.) “If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you’re allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.” ― Shannon L. Alder

10.) “If you want to forget something or someone, never hate it, or never hate him/her. Everything and everyone that you hate is engraved upon your heart; if you want to let go of something, if you want to forget, you cannot hate.” ― C. JoyBell C.

11.) “There is no such thing as a “broken family.” Family is family, and is not determined by marriage certificates, divorce papers, and adoption documents. Families are made in the heart. The only time family becomes null is when those ties in the heart are cut. If you cut those ties, those people are not your family. If you make those ties, those people are your family. And if you hate those ties, those people will still be your family because whatever you hate will always be with you.” ― C. JoyBell C.

12.) “If you didn’t love him, this never would have happened. But you did. And accepting that love and everything that followed it is part of letting it go.” ― Sarah Dessen, Dreamland

13.) “I realize there’s something incredibly honest about trees in winter, how they’re experts at letting things go.” ― Jeffrey McDaniel

14.) “Let go of certainty. The opposite isn’t uncertainty. It’s openness, curiosity and a willingness to embrace paradox, rather than choose up sides. The ultimate challenge is to accept ourselves exactly as we are, but never stop trying to learn and grow.” ― Tony Schwartz

15.) “Being different is a revolving door in your life where secure people enter and insecure exit.” ― Shannon L. Alder

17.) “The greatest step towards a life of simplicity is to learn to let go.” ― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

18.) “Love is never supposed to hurt. Love is supposed to heal, to be your haven from misery, to make living fucking worthwhile.” ― Mia Asher, Arsen: A Broken Love Story

19.) “The most difficult aspect of moving on is accepting that the other person already did.” ― FaraazKazi

Inspirational Letting Go quotes about Life

20.) “The beautiful journey of today can only begin when we learn to let go of yesterday.” ― Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

21.) “We can’t be afraid of change. You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. Holding onto something that is good for you now, may be the very reason why you don’t have something better.” ― C. JoyBell C.

22.) “There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.” ― Terry Pratchett

23.) “Some birds are not meant to be caged, that’s all. Their feathers are too bright, their songs too sweet and wild. So you let them go, or when you open the cage to feed them they somehow fly out past you. And the part of you that knows it was wrong to imprison them in the first place rejoices, but still, the place where you live is that much more drab and empty for their departure.” ― Stephen King, Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption: A Story from Different Seasons

24.) “Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.” ― Ann Landers

25.) “Even on my weakest days I get a little bit stronger” ― Sara Evans

26.) “Most things are forgotten over time. Even the war itself, the life-and-death struggle people went through is now like something from the distant past. We’re so caught up in our everyday lives that events of the past are no longer in orbit around our minds. There are just too many things we have to think about everyday, too many new things we have to learn. But still, no matter how much time passes, no matter what takes place in the interim, there are some things we can never assign to oblivion, memories we can never rub away. They remain with us forever, like a touchstone.” ― Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

28.) “I’m guilty of giving people more chances than they deserve but when I’m done, I’m done.” ― Turcois Ominek

29.) “I demolish my bridges behind me…then there is no choice but to move forward” ― Fridtjof Nansen

30.) “I just wanted to tell you that I understand if you go. It’s okay if you have to leave us. It’s okay if you want to stop fighting.” ― Gayle Forman, If I Stay

31.) “Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.” ― Deborah Reber, Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul

32.) “A star falls from the sky and into your hands. Then it seeps through your veins and swims inside your blood and becomes every part of you. And then you have to put it back into the sky. And it’s the most painful thing you’ll ever have to do and that you’ve ever done. But what’s yours is yours. Whether it’s up in the sky or here in your hands. And one day, it’ll fall from the sky and hit you in the head real hard and that time, you won’t have to put it back in the sky again.” ― C. JoyBell C.

34.) “One of the best times for figuring out who you are and what you really want out of life? Right after a break-up.” ― Mandy Hale, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass

35.) “If people refuse to look at you in a new light and they can only see you for what you were, only see you for the mistakes you’ve made, if they don’t realize that you are not your mistakes, then they have to go.” ― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

Letting Go Quotes about Forgiveness

36.) “Inner peace can be reached only when we practice forgiveness. Forgiveness is letting go of the past, and is therefore the means for correcting our misperceptions.” ― Gerald G. Jampolsky, Love Is Letting Go of Fear

37.) “Letting go. Everyone talks about it like it’s the easiest thing. Unfurl your fingers one by one until your hand is open. But my hand has been clenched into a fist for three years now; it’s frozen shut.” ― Gayle Forman, Where She Went

38.) “The truth was, he now belonged only to my past, and it was time I begin to accept it, as much as it hurt to do so.” ― Tammara Webber, Easy

39.) “And I told him, I said: “One day you’re going to miss the subway because it’s not going to come. One of these days, it’s going to break down and it’s not going to come around and everyone else will just wait for the next one or will take the bus, or walk, or run to the next station: they will go on with their lives. And you’re not going to be able to go on with your life! You’ll be standing there, in the subway station, staring at the tube. Why? Because you think that everything has to happen perfectly and on time and when you think it’s going to happen! Well guess what! That’s not how things happen! And you’ll be the only one who’s not going to be able to go on with life, just because your subway broke down. So you know what, you’ve got to let go, you’ve got to know that things don’t happen the way you think they’re going to happen, but that’s okay, because there’s always the bus, there’s always the next station…you can always take a cab.” ― C. JoyBell C.

40.) “There ain’t no way you can hold onto something that wants to go, you understand? You can only love what you got while you got it.” ― Kate DiCamillo, Because of Winn-Dixie

42.) “Last night I lost the world, and gained the universe.” ― C. JoyBell C.

43.) “The day I understood everything, was the day I stopped trying to figure everything out. The day I knew peace was the day I let everything go.” ― C. JoyBell C.

44.) “Your time is way too valuable to be wasting on people that can’t accept who you are.” ― TurcoisOminek

45.) “No matter how much suffering you went through, you never wanted to let go of those memories.” ― Haruki Murakami

46.) “When you leave, weary of me, without a word I shall gently let you go.” ― Kim Sowol

47.) “Nothing ever happens like you imagine it will… but then again, if you don’t imagine, nothing ever happens at all. Imagining isn’t perfect. You can’t get all the way inside someone else… But imagining being someone else, or the world being something else, is the only way in. It is the machine that kills the fascists” ― John Green, Paper Towns

48.) “Today expect something good to happen to you no matter what occurred yesterday. Realize the past no longer holds you captive. It can only continue to hurt you if you hold on to it. Let the past go. A simply abundant world awaits. (January 11)” ― Sarah Ban Breathnach, Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy

50.) “Sometimes the hardest part isn’t letting go but rather learning to start over.” ― Nicole Sobon, Program 13

Which letting go quotes stood out to you most and why?

Letting go and moving on of love, anger, expectations or burdens is never an easy thing to do. But it’s something we all need to learn if we want to discover better things in life. Hopefully, these wise words have given you strength and inspiration to do what you believe is right.

The post 50 Letting Go Quotes For Finally Moving On appeared first on Everyday Power Blog.

[people-of-uber]

Sat 2/25 to Sun 2/26, 2017

First Oscar-nominated person to ride in my car.

11:24pm. Found myself south of the Loop off of 288, in the middle of nowhere, then all of a sudden there’s a castle on the right. It’s called The Citadel, and it’s a banquet/reception hall that looks like a castle on the outside. The couple I picked up were dressed in Hawaiian shirts with cargo shorts, sandals with socks, with fake cameras around their necks – while everyone else was dressed in white dinner jackets or white Cuban shirts. This was a fundraiser for the couple’s kid’s school, with the theme of Havana Nights; they went as tacky American tourists in Cuba. Both of them are in the oil industry and so we talked about what I used to do at my most recent job there, with some overlap in what I taught and what he does (related to the interface screens for the control systems on drill ships). He asked for my card; you never know what might come of something like that.

11:50. Three high school kids, two girls and a guy. The girls in the back seat yammered away about Snaptexting and Facechatting and all of the high school drama of who likes who and who hates who, and pretty soon I couldn’t even follow. Dropped the girls off at midnight at one house, then the guy got dropped off at a different part of town. I was curious as to how they knew each other from different areas, and he said that one of the girls is the daughter of friends of his parents, and they’ve been friends since birth. None of them appear to have been drinking (surprisingly to me).

1:35am. A young guy (early 20s) from a bar, had been drinking, on his way home. He lives in the Montrose area and owns his own home, which he bought when he turned 20 with the inheritance he got when his parents died when he was 18. He owns his own business too, something to do with insurance. He went to college and got a degree in mechanical engineering, which was what his father (also an engineer) wanted him to do, but after he graduated he fell into an opportunity with some of his father’s friends and he’s doing well with his choices now. He was sympathetic to my story of being a laid-off NASA worker and is confident there are big things ahead for me.

1:46am. A couple apparently hasn’t been dating long, she mentioned how they haven’t really asked each other the hard questions yet about each other. She thinks she’s too quiet and shy before she’s been drinking, and comes out of her shell after a couple drinks, but she doesn’t like the fact that she has to be drinking for that side of her to come out. He asked her if he talks too much, she replied “you talk a lot”, which both he and I agreed that “a lot” is not as bad as “too much”. She posed a question for him to think about: name three fictional characters who make up various facets of your personality. She named Pam Beesley from “The Office” as introverted with a bit of a hidden edge; Hermione Granger from “Harry Potter” as the know-it-all who is secretly (or not so secretly) a bad-ass; and “because I have a legit Cinderella costume at home, I have to name a Disney Princess” so she chose Elsa from “Frozen” because she’s been called an ice queen.

1:59am. A couple who was not drunk, because they hadn’t been at the bar on Washington that long. They were at the Symphony earlier in the evening, then went home and changed to come out to the bar for a nightcap and to unwind. They agreed that they were getting too old for the bar scene, but while she thinks the bar scene on Washington is hopping (there really are a lot of people going home at 2am), he thinks it’s long past its prime.

2:23am. Picked up my last passengers of the night on Main Street downtown, right at the corner where a band of 4 musicians were playing Mardi Gras style music, because that’s what you do downtown after the bars are closed when you’re on the street eating pizza. He has lived in Houston a while, recently moved into the Heights. She’s just been here a few years, from LA. He used to work in Denver where he was the VIP manager of one of the downtown clubs, and they would regularly get customers that people would come looking for (like the cops), so they’d tell the cops they haven’t seen the guy and then tell the guy that the cops are looking for him so that he could leave. This one regular they had was a Russian guy with the nickname “Moose”, he played for the Colorado Avalanche hockey team but retired when he blew out his knee. Turns out that one night the cops came looking for Moose at the club, but not only did Moose flee the club, he fled the country because he was going to be busted for heading up Denver’s largest ecstasy drug ring. Moose is now living in Peru somewhere. [Note: I tried looking up this story on Google but was unsuccessful in finding anything, if you know more, please speak up in the comments.] After I dropped him off, she was going to get out with him and then just call another car to take her to her place, but I told her I’d wait a few minutes because that would be easier than her calling another car (though my ulterior motive was to continue this trip which was a 2.3x surge fare).

2:07pm. Woman flying back to Houston after a weekend in Dallas with a college friend, which wasn’t as interesting as this upcoming weekend would be, as her company is going to Las Vegas for “meetings” (that is, you have a business meeting in the morning and then you’re free to play for the rest of the day). She’s been there a lot and stays at higher-end properties like Wynn and Bellagio, and doesn’t like to gamble but likes to go shopping. We compared notes on which hotels we like, favorite places to go to the clubs (she likes the one at Aria), and places to go shopping (she likes the Forum Shops at Caesar’s). She’s seen all of the Cirque shows in Vegas except for the Michael Jackson one (even Elvis and Criss Angel), and the Beatles Love is her favorite, which she’s seen several times (I’ve seen it twice). She hasn’t yet seen La Reve at Wynn, which I liked better than the similar water-themed show “O” at Bellagio, or Absinthe at Caesar’s, which I liked better than the similar show Zumanity at NYNY. She’s never been to LA, so she got a cheap round-trip flight out there leaving before lunch and coming back at 10pm, she wants to go shopping and to the beach. I suggested Venice Beach and the Santa Monica Pier and the nearby Third Street Promenade pedestrian area.

3:43pm. Got lucky and found a rider who was going to Hobby Airport, which is on my way home. She’s flying back to LA. I asked her what she did out there, and she said she was a film editor. I asked why she’s in Houston when the Oscars are on tonight, she said she messed up and forgot the date, so her husband is recording it for her and she’ll get home about halfway through it. Some of her friends are up for awards tonight. For the duration of the trip, I was fascinated to be able to ask her questions about what her job entails, how she does her job (10-12 hour days watching the dailies and cutting footage together, then relaying info to the director on set about any shots that still need to be picked up or redone for things like bad angles or out of focus), how she got into the business (she made and edited her own stuff, then got an internship putting together a documentary, and while in film school – crossing paths with “Breaking Bad” producer Vince Gilligan – finding that she was the only one with editing experience in her class, and just moved into the industry that way), what her next project is (“Battle of the Sexes” coming this fall, with Emma Roberts as Billie Jean King and Steve Carrell as Bobby Riggs; she talked about how some scenes have facial replacements on body doubles and how they created that footage, and that they’ll Forrest Gump-style add their actress to replace a real person in archival footage with Howard Cosell), and examples of good and bad editing in recent movies (I mentioned I’ve heard that an editor is noticed only if they don’t do a good job, even though the director approves the edits; she countered with the fact that sometimes directors have certain stylistic choices they make in the editing room, and as the editor, it’s the director’s film, not hers). She doesn’t have a favorite movie that she’s worked on, as all of them are like her children. [Note: after I got home, I looked her up, and she’s Pamela Martin, who was Oscar-nominated for “The Fighter” in 2010, directed by David O. Russell. I didn’t ask if she had ever been nominated, and she didn’t offer it.]

Get a free (up to $20) ride if you’re a first-time Uber rider, or use this promo code if you want to drive: https://get.uber.com/invite/michaelg1733

[amazinggraciegurl]

1. selfie-I’ll post one later! :)

2. what would you name your future kids?--For girls my favorites are Rosie, Lucy, Alice, Chloe, Cadence, Penelope, Olivia, Hazel, Opal, and Willow. For boys my favorites are Edward, Phillip, Oliver, Forrest, August, Emmerson, and Noah. :)

3. do you miss anyone? Yes. My great grandparents (they’re still alive, but just live far away), some friends I haven’t seen in a while, and my old elementary/middle school teacher.

4. what are you looking forward to? I’m looking forward to a mini weekend vacation I’m going on with my family next week. :)

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile? My mom, for sure. :)

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?  OMG, YES. I’ve never dated anybody, but I had a “break-up” with one of my best friends last year, and I still think about her pretty much every day. 

7. what was your life like last year?  I was in 8th grade. I was best friends with a girl named Ava. I was very passionate about violin (I still am, but am focused on some other things now). 

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?  Yes! Lots of times.

9. who did you last see in person?  My mom. She just told me she was going to the store like three seconds ago. :)

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?  I like to think I am, but I’m really not. My mom says you can always tell by my face what I’m feeling. :)

11. are you listening to music right now?  Nope. :)

12. what is something you want right now?  I want to be able to write something good right now, but I just am having trouble getting started. 

13. how do you feel right now?  Pretty neutral. Not especially happy or depressed. Just kinda relaxed (well, as relaxed as I can get). :)

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?  Does my dad count? If so, I think sometime yesterday. If my dad doesn’t count, I literally have no idea. 

15. personality description--I’m intelligent, ambitious, creative, passionate, thoughtful, open-minded, anxious, obsessive, and introverted. I try really hard to do well in school and usually get good grades. I play violin and love music. I love to read and write, but lately have been having trouble finding time to do them. I love my family and spending time with them is very important to me. I love hanging out with friends, but I can only socialize for so long before I need to go home. I’m definitely a bit of a homebody (my mom has to force me to leave the house and do something sometimes). I have OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) and low-grade depression. I am, at the moment, trying to figure out whether I’m lesbian or bisexual (whatever the case, I know I’m attracted to girls, but am having a hard time figuring out if I’m at all interested in boys). I get SUPER obsessed with characters from books and movies and get SO passionate about my OTP’s, it can literally be scary. I accept people for who they are, and if you ever want to ask me anything or just talk, I’m open to it. :)

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?  YES. Lots of times.

17. opinion on insecurities.  I think insecurities are just a part of life. Everybody has them, just in different aspects of their lives. There are people who are SUPER smart, but think they’re ugly, and then there’s people who seem SO confident and outgoing and love their bodies, but secretly think they’re stupid. There are many variations of insecurities, and literally everybody has to deal with them, no matter how big or small they are.

18. do you miss how things were a year ago?  A little bit, but not really. I miss my old teacher and orchestra conductor, but overall, I think my life is better this year. I have more friends, I like school better, and I’m more in tune with who I am and what I need.  

19. have you ever been to New York?  NO. :(

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?  Answering what my favorite song is has always been hard for me, so I usually just say who my favorite artist or band is. At the moment, it’s probably Green Day, Linkin Park, or Evanescence. 

21. age and birthday?  I’m 15 years old, and my birthday is October 30, 2001. 

22. description of crush---Oh...here’s a fun one! :D  It’s a girl. She goes to my high school. She has long brown hair, green eyes, and nicely tanned skin. :)

23. fear(s)--  Failure (in school, in my relationships with my family and friends, and just in life in general), death (especially of somebody I love), elevators (I know...LOL), separation from my family (going to sleepaway camp is a nightmare for me...), and lots of other silly things I can’t even think of right now.

24. height--5′7″ 

25. role model--MY MOM, my big sister, Anna Kendrick, Brittany Snow, Bernie Sanders, Barack Obama, Michelle Obama, Annabeth Chase from Percy Jackson/Heroes of Olympus, the list goes on and on...:)

26. idol(s)--I know there is a difference between “role model” and “idol”, but I’m having a hard time differentiating them in the context of my life. 

27. things i hate--Bullying, prejudice, rude people (people who interrupt when you speak, especially), inequality, books and movies that take FOREVER to come out, books, movies, and shows that END (okay, I know they all do eventually but it HURTS, it really does). 

28. i’ll love you if…You respect me and others, you treat me and others with kindness, you have compassion for others and the world around you, you are polite, and you help others in need (and me when I need help).

29. favourite film(s)--Pitch Perfect 1&2 (and 3 SOON...), Stepbrothers, What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, Fried Green Tomatoes, Good Will Hunting, Titanic, Matilda, Frozen, Beauty & The Beast, Mulan, Brave, Lilo & Stitch, The Lion King, Up, Ramona & Beezus, Elf, okay...I should probably stop. :)

30. favourite tv show(s)--The Office, Parks & Recreation, The Middle, Portlandia, Seinfeld, Malcolm In The Middle, H2O: Just Add Water (literally my childhood), My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, Suite Life of Zack & Cody and Suite Life on Deck, Good Luck Charlie, SpongeBob Squarepants, Adventure Time, okay...again, I must stop. :)

31. 3 random facts--About me or in general? I’m assuming about me. 1. I have brown hair.  2. I have brown eyes.  3. I have braces. 

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?  Mainly girls, but I have had best friends who are boys. :)

33. something you want to learn--I want to learn how to play the piano and the guitar, and how to sing better (which I doubt will happen...). I also want to learn how to act better. :)

34. most embarrassing moment--One time in third grade I went to the bathroom and, not knowing that I had toilet paper trailing out of my pants behind me, I went back to class. Literally nobody told me until I noticed a few minutes later. Also, one time this year (in ninth grade), I farted in class during a test and some people looked at me weird. I’m not sure which is more embarrassing, so I just put both. :)

35. favourite subject--Since starting high school, I’ve learned to love SO many subjects better than I did before. My favorite subject used to be English, but my English teacher (more like professor, my mom says, since he is SO FREAKING INTENSE), kind of ruined it for me. Now I’d say my favorite subjects are math, German, history, and music.:)

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill? 1. I want to be a professional violinist. 2. I want to publish a book. 3. I want to explore as much of the world as I can and help as many people around the world as I can. 

37. favourite actor/actress--Some of my favorite actors are Leonardo DiCaprio, Will Ferrell, Zac Efron, and Johnny Depp (don’t hate me, I know he abused his wife and that is HORRIBLE, but he is just so freaking talented. He’s one of my favorite actors, but definitely not one of my favorite people. Let’s just put it that way). :)  Some of my favorite actresses are Anna Kendrick, Brittany Snow, Amy Poehler, Tina Fey, Aubrey Plaza, and Kate Winslet.

38. favourite comedian(s)--Ellen DeGeneres, Amy Poehler and Tina Fey (literally one of the best duos ever), Will Ferrell, and Steve Carrel. :)

39. favourite sport(s)--Basketball, swimming, gymnastics, and dance. I’m terrible at sports, but these are the ones I’ve tried and at least slightly enjoyed. :)

40. favourite memory--I don’t know if I can name just one favorite memory. Some of my favorite memories are road trips with my family, visiting my great grandparents at their farm in Wisconsin, visiting my best friend who lives REALLY far away in Illinois (I live in California, just to give you guys perceptive about how FAR it really is), celebrating Christmas Eve and Day with my family, camping with my family and friends, reading with my little sister, early-morning coffee runs with my big sister, fun car trips with my mom, late-night chats with my grand,a, and really just any moment spent with my family and/or friends. :)

41. relationship status--Single, but really wanting to get out there (but realistically way too shy). 

42. favourite book(s)--Percy Jackson and Heroes of Olympus Series, Harry Potter Series, Ender’s Game, Practical Magic, A Year of Wonders, A Year Without Autumn, Miss Peregrine’s Home For Peculiar Children, The Secret Life of Bees, To Kill A Mockingbird, and the list goes on. :)

43. favourite song ever--”Don’t You Forget About Me” by Simple Minds

44. age you get mistaken for--I think I look about my age, but I am pretty tall, so maybe I’d get mistaken for 16 or 17 at the oldest. 

45. how you found out about your idol--I’ll just say my biggest idol is Anna Kendrick, and I found out about her through Pitch Perfect. :)

46. what my last text message says--My last text message is from my big sister, and it says “Sorry, I just got off work.” 

47. turn ons--Kindness, compassion, politeness, helpfulness, acceptance of others. :)

48. turn offs--Rudeness, unkindness, thoughtlessness, coldness, and prejudice.  

49. where i want to be right now--Wisconsin, Illinois, San Diego, or maybe just my big sister’s house would be good. 

50. favourite picture of your idol--Im a little bit confused about this one. Should I post a picture of Anna Kendrick or describe one? I’m just going to skip it...

51. starsign--My basic sun sign is Scorpio. For those of you who are more into astrology and know the terminology, I’m a Scorpio Sun, Aries Moon, Gemini Ascendant, and Libra Venus. :)

52. something i’m talented at--I’m good at playing the violin. :)

53. 5 things that make me happy--Music, family, good books, movies, and shows (though that’s technically three, I’m counting it as one), nature, and good food. :)

54. something thats worrying me at the moment--My grades, my anxiety and depression, my future (which I’m probably too young to be worrying about), my crush (who I am literally obsessed with), and just my general identity. 

55. tumblr friends--I don’t really have any Tumblr friends yet. :)

56. favourite food(s)--Pizza, chicken, mashed potatoes, watermelon, broccoli, curry, yogurt, oranges, the list goes on and on. :) 

57. favourite animal(s)--Lions, tigers, dolphins, panda bears, sloths, and dogs. :)

58. description of my best friend--I have a few best friends. One of my best friends is named Margaret. She is 14 years old and in 8th grade. We met and have been really close since kindergarten. She likes reading, acting, and playing Sims (which we love to play together). She loves cats. Her star sign is a Taurus. :)  Another one of my best friends is named Roan. She is 14 years old and in 9th grade. We met at a violin recital a couple years ago, but didn’t get close until we started at the same high school last fall. We have lots of the same classes together. She likes reading, writing, playing violin, and playing video games. Her star sign is a Leo. Another one of my best friends is named Ione. She is 15 years and in 10th grade. Our moms (my mom Molly and her mom Heather) are best friends and have been really close since they were kids, but they slowly lost contact when my mom moved as a teenager. When I was 8 years old, they reconnected through Facebook. On our trip to Wisconsin, we stopped by their house, and I got to meet Ione. We instantly clicked and have been best friends ever since. We spend a few days to a week (depending on our schedules) at their house every summer, and stay in contact through texts and letters during the school year. She loves reading, writing, playing violin and piano, basketball, and volleyball. Her star sign is a Libra. :)

59. why i joined tumblr--I joined Tumblr because I think it’s a cool place to express yourself, see posts related to your interests, and connect with people who have similar interests. I also think the concept and setup of Tumblr is a lot more creative and original than any other social media site. Also, since none of my family members or (sometimes very conservative) extended family members are on Tumblr, I can be free to share my very liberal views without getting pounded. I can also be free to share my lesbian/bisexual identity, as well as my passionate support of the LGTBQ community, without getting disowned by any homophobic extended family members. :)

60. ask me anything you want--I’m not sure what it means by this, but yes, I’m open to people asking me anything they want on here. Obviously nothing TOO personal, but I’m pretty open about most things, so don’t worry. :) 

[imjustthemechanic]

The French Mistake

Part 1/? - A Visitor Part 2/? - The Kulturhistorisk Museum Heist Part 3/? - Cutscene Part 4/? - The Marvel Cinematic Universe Part 5/? - Breathless Part 6/? - Escape at Last Part 7/? - Fox in Socks Part 8/? - Things Go Wrong Part 9/? - Downey and Out Part 10/? - Road Trip Part 11/? - Temptation Part 12/? - An Awful Reunion Part 13/? - Unreality Intrudes Part 14/? - A Call for Help Part 15/? - Loki’s Guests Part 16/? - Stan Lee Cameo Part 17/? - Reassessment Part 18/? - Midnight Invasion Part 19/? - Elevator Fight Part 20/? - Courage Part 21/? - Unwelcome Back Part 22/? - Darkest Hour Part 23/? - They Are Here Part 24/? - The Jet Propulsion Laboratory Part 25/? - Word of God Part 26/? - Avengers Assembled Part 27/? - The Houston Underground Part 28/? - Houston has a Problem Part 29/? - Onward and Upward Part 30/? - The Chi’Tauri Queen Part 31/? - Through the Wormhole Part 32/? - Prisoners Part 33/? - Arm’s Length Part 34/? - A Moment’s Respite Part 35/? - Ravagers to the Rescue Part 36/? - What Happened to Hiddleston Part 37/? - Haven Part 38/? - Steve Has a Terrible Idea Part 39/? - Can’t Be Choosers Part 40/? - Stan Lee Cameo Redux

The gang meets a familiar face, and gets some hints that something bigger is coming.

A couple hundred more yards around the inner ring brought them to another attic door, which Musa identified as the one that led to the Blue Giant.  When they dropped the ladder to climb down, Steve found they were being watched not by guards this time, but by half a dozen women of various sizes and colours but all in their underwear, who were passing around what looked like a vape.  They watched the intruders enter, but none commented or came closer.

There were more women, or at least, female creatures, wandering around on the lower levels as they made their way down. Steve decided to believe that the upstairs of the Blue Giant was some kind of female-only hotel, or a women’s shelter or something.  Definitely not a brothel, no matter how many of the inhabitants waved and winked at the party as they went by.

By the time they got to the third floor, they could hear thumping music.  Musa opened a door that led onto a balcony over the dance floor, and the music was suddenly loud enough to rattle Steve’s teeth as he stepped through to survey what was there. It didn’t look all that unlike a pub on Earth, he thought… there were people talking, drinking, dancing, and conducting shady-looking business deals, under the light of a set of drifting holographic orbs that did indeed look much like planets such as Neptune or Uranus. It was kind of nice, he thought, to know that human nature apparently covered all roughly human-shaped sentient creatures… it gave them all some common ground.  At the same time, when he considered some of the things human nature included, it was also terrifying.

“Let me see,” said Musa, scanning the crowd for familiar faces or approximations thereof.  Steve looked too, not expecting to recognize anybody… but then suddenly, he did.  In one corner, surrounded by women and petting some kind of animal, was a very familiar face indeed.  Steve had noticed it in the brig on the Chi’Tauri mothership, but he remembered it from before that, too.  It was the guy who looked like Stan Lee.

“There,” he pointed.  “We know that guy.”

“You do?”  Musa frowned.  “That’s funny.  I don’t.”

“Trust me, we do,” said Steve, and started down the steps to the main level.  Natasha went with him, and Steve was confident that she’d come to the same conclusion he had – this was what Stan Lee on Earth had meant when he’d told them they would see him again.  He’d been surprised when they phoned him from JPL, so he hadn’t been thinking of that when he’d spoken to them in the hotel.  Instead, he had somehow known that they would end up here and run into what must be his alternate self.  How he’d known it was not important… maybe it was because he was the guy writing the story, but Steve wasn’t going to think about that too hard.

The man was sitting at a corner table.  A robotic woman, like a much newer and cleaner version of Miss Alpha-Eleven-Three, was pouring him a drink. Another being, this one resembling a cross between a woman and a blue gorilla, was massaging his shoulders.  A third, chalk-white with glittering blue scales and spines protruding from her cheeks and forehead, was sitting next to him hanging on every word he was saying.  In his lap a furry creature that looked kind of like a very small leopard and kind of like a six-legged armadillo was curled up, enjoying being petted.  As Steve and Natasha approached, the man who looked like Stan Lee lowered his head so he could peer over his tinted visor at them.

“Do I owe you people money?” he guessed.

“No.  We need your help,” said Steve.

“I don’t do help,” the man replied.  He accepted a glass of something fizzy and electric pink from the robot woman.  “Thank you, darling.”

“You helped us before, in another universe,” Steve reminded him.

The man downed his drink and shook his head. “Couldn’t have been me,” he said. “I don’t interfere, I just watch.  Right, ladies?”  He smiled at his companions.

“We like it when you watch,” the blue gorilla purred.

Steve was a little surprised – for some reason he’d assumed that this man would remember meeting them before… as if Stan Lee were a creature that existed across all realities at the same time.  Evidently he was not, and that left Steve a little unsure how to proceed.  He glanced up at the balcony where the others were watching.  Musa was clinging to Evans from behind, and whispered something in his ear that made his eyes go huge.

Then Steve looked at Natasha, which she interpreted as a cue to take charge.  “You owe us a favour for saving your life,” she said.

“Captain Schist said we did you enough favours in return for that,” the man said.

Nat grabbed him by one of a set of bandoliers he was wearing across his shoulders.  Steve grabbed him by the other.  The women and the armadillo-kitty got out of the way as they dragged him to his feet.

“I’m about to save your life again,” Steve said.

“From what?” the man asked, startled.

“From her,” said Steve, nodding towards Natasha. “Hear that?  You’re not allowed to kill him.”

“Aw,” said Nat.  “And here I was looking forward to it!”

They escorted him gently, but firmly enough to show that they meant it, back towards the stairs.  The others came down to meet them, and Hemsworth and Hiddleston took hold of the man by the arms, to keep him from bolting.  He certainly looked frightened enough to try it.

The three women and the cat thing, however, had followed them.  “Hey, you can’t just drag him away!” protested the white and silver one.  “He’s the best tipper in the place!”  She reached out and grabbed Hiddleston’s right wrist.

Frost immediately formed on the cuff of his sleeve.  Her flesh was icy cold. He looked at it, then shut his eyes and concentrated.  His hand turned ice-blue, and the silver woman gasped and pulled her hand back as if his touch had burned it.  For a moment his eyes flashed red, then he shook his head hard and returned to normal.

The silver woman tapped her hand against the railing, and it made a thunk noise.  She was cold, but Loki’s Jotun-derived body was colder, and had frozen her stiff.

“That’s not what the bar’s name means,” she said, shrinking back.  The others retreated with her.

Loki fixed Hiddleston with a glare.  “Never do that in public again,” he hissed.

“Give me my own body back and I won’t,” said Hiddleston, giving his own hand a shake.  “That was weird.”

“Where do we go now?” Steve asked Musa.  “Back up, or back out to the street?  Where’s the harbour?” he asked.  He knew it was somewhere in the outer ring, but didn’t know where in relation to where they were now.

“All around the outside,” she replied.  “We’ve passed where your ship is and we’ll have to double back.  It’ll be easier to do it from the outer ring, although if Aarflot’s noticed you’re gone he’ll have people looking for you.”

“Then let’s go by the street,” said Steve.

They started around the edge of the dance floor.  There was a man with six arms, arranged radially around his torso, dancing with four women and two other men at the same time.  It was quite something, and Nat had to give Steve’s arm a tug to keep him from stopping to stare.

They were almost at the front entrance when another creature stepped into their way.  This one was seven feet tall and almost as wide, with a bronze carapace covered in stiff hairs and several sets of mandibles that clicked ominously as it loomed over them.  The whole party stopped short, looking up at it unsure what to do, especially as this threatening beast was wearing a tropical-print shirt.

“Did you pay the cover charge?” it asked.

Musa ducked under Steve’s arm to stand between them and the creature, but then she smiled and reached up to pat it on the face. “Nukk!” she said.  “Don’t worry, they’re with me!”

The beast’s posture immediately softened.  “Musa!” it said.  “All right, then, sorry folks.  Have a nice day!”  It moved aside, and they were able to descend the steps to the street.

“Who are you?” Evans asked Musa.

“Nobody in particular,” she replied cheerfully, “but Nukk and I go way back.”

Steve half-expected to be mobbed again as soon as they reached the street, but in this part of the station people were keeping their heads down, not wanting to be seen or to see others.  They hung in corners and under eaves, and more than once a pair – or more – of glowing eyes blinked at them before vanishing into the shadows.  This was the seediest part of a very seedy town.

“Where are you taking me?” asked the man who looked like Stan Lee.

“Back to our ship,” said Steve.  He and Natasha were in the lead now, with him between them and Musa just behind, clinging to Evan’s arm.  Hopefully having the aliens in front would help the group, now ten strong, blend into this weird place.

“To the Leviathan?” the man squeaked.  “Why? Are you gonna use me as a hostage to make Schist leave it alone, because I can tell you now that’s not gonna work.”

“No,” said Steve.  “We want you to send a message to the Chi’Tauri telling them where we are, and saying you want to sell your prisoners back to them.”

“Are you insane?” the man asked.  “They’ll come here and blast the whole station out of the sky!”

“And you’ll have to fight them,” Steve agreed, “so while they’re distracted doing that, we can get back on board their ship.” As Natasha had said, it was a terrible idea, but it was the best they could do with the resources they had.

“You know that won’t help you!  There’ll only be one or two queens per ship, but there are thousands more spread across the galaxy,” the man said.  “You won’t even make a dent in their dominions.  Are you going to let us all die for that?”

For a moment he did seem to have a point… then Steve reminded himself that the people on this planet and orbiting station were hardly innocent bystanders.  “You’re a bunch of pirates and slavers,” he pointed out.

“Not all of us!” said the man.  “Even if we were, who are you to be judge, jury, and executioner for the lot of us?”

Musa held up a hand.  “I would like to say that this is the first I’ve heard of this plan.  Did you know about this, Christine?” she asked Evans.

“Yeah,” he said awkwardly.  “It’s sort of…”

“It’s the only idea we’ve got right now,” said Natasha.  “We need to get our friends back to their own reality, and the only way we know of to do that is with the tesseract.”

The man who looked like Stan Lee stopped dead, leading Steve and Nat to stumble on either side of them and Evans and Musa behind them to have to move aside so as not to run into him.  “The… the tesseract?” he asked.  “The Chi’Tauri have an infinity stone?”

“Yeah,” said Steve.  “That’s kind of our fault.”  He looked at Loki, wondering if he should say that it was specifically his fault.  Loki, in turn, looked at Thor, still blaming him for breaking the rune stone.

Their captive licked his lips.  “Okay, look,” he said.  “I’m not supposed to intervene, really.  I’m supposed to observe while destiny takes its course.”

Thor pushed between Steve and Musa to stare at him. “You?” he said.  “You are… of course you are!”  And he laughed.  “You are one of the Watchers!”

“Yeah,” the man said, as if admitting something shameful.  “Nobody’s supposed to know, but I’ve been watching you.  Each and every one of you.”

“Then our destinies must be great indeed,” Thor said. “The Watchers take an interest in those who have some role to play on the grandest scales of the cosmos.”

This pronouncement was terrifying on multiple levels, but the worst of all was that when Steve looked at his companions, he saw that the actors were nodding.  Evans and Hemsworth, Johansson and Hiddleston, all looked as if they thought this made perfect sense.  They knew the future, sort of, he reminded himself.  Downey had talked about spoilers.  They were about to get a big one, weren’t they?

“I’ll be your messenger, then,” said the Watcher, and cracked a bit of a smile.  “You’re forcing me to do it, after all – wouldn’t want Black Widow to break my neck! The inevitable will happen one way or another, but maybe we can put it off a little longer.”

[imjustthemechanic]

The French Mistake

Part 1/? - A Visitor Part 2/? - The Kulturhistorisk Museum Heist Part 3/? - Cutscene Part 4/? - The Marvel Cinematic Universe Part 5/? - Breathless Part 6/? - Escape at Last Part 7/? - Fox in Socks Part 8/? - Things Go Wrong Part 9/? - Downey and Out Part 10/? - Road Trip Part 11/? - Temptation Part 12/? - An Awful Reunion Part 13/? - Unreality Intrudes Part 14/? - A Call for Help Part 15/? - Loki’s Guests Part 16/? - Stan Lee Cameo Part 17/? - Reassessment Part 18/? - Midnight Invasion Part 19/? - Elevator Fight Part 20/? - Courage Part 21/? - Unwelcome Back Part 22/? - Darkest Hour Part 23/? - They Are Here Part 24/? - The Jet Propulsion Laboratory Part 25/? - Word of God Part 26/? - Avengers Assembled Part 27/? - The Houston Underground Part 28/? - Houston has a Problem Part 29/? - Onward and Upward

Our heroes destroy stuff.  That always happens.

The three women from NASA got back into the elevator and the doors closed on them with a rather distressing finality.  It made Steve wish he could go with them – not because he was feeling in any way cowardly, but because he wanted to be sure they made it out okay.  He couldn’t do that, not because of any injury or any limitation of a body without super-soldier serum, but merely because he could not be in two places at once. There were some things even at the best of times that he had to leave to others.

The rest of them needed to find the building Ellen Ochoa had called Old Mission Control.  There was a visitors’ directory map in front of the remains of the spacecraft model pedestal, so Thor and Loki stood guard while Steve and Natasha cleaned the bits off it and examined the battered surface.

“Okay, we’re here,” said Steve, finding the red dot.

“And it says Old Mission Control is in this building here.”  Nat put her own finger on the map, a couple of inches from his.  “So we just need to cross this green space.”  She glanced towards the main doors.  There were trees outside, but the top of another building was visible beyond them.  It was only maybe two hundred yards.

Of course it wouldn’t be that easy.  The sound of heavy footsteps alerted them to the fact that the other two Chi’Tauri soldiers were approaching.  The group instinctively clustered together, with Nat and the Asgardians moving in front of the injured Steve as they all edged towards the door, hoping to get there before the aliens cut them off, but knowing they probably wouldn’t.

“It’ll be up to you, brother,” Thor said quietly. “You’re the best-armed.”

“I know,” said Loki, hefting the plasma rifle. It was clearly very heavy – the Chi’Tauri had waved it around like nothing, but Loki needed both arms.  “We’ll have to take them off-guard.”

“We could do Get Help,” Thor suggested.

Loki rolled his eyes and shook his head.  “You wouldn’t have the strength!  Not in this body.”

“I bet I could, at that,” Thor said.

“We are not doing Get Help,” Loki said firmly. “There is no need.”

“What’s Get Help?” asked Natasha.

“It’s an old ploy…” Thor began.

“If you don’t stop talking I will shoot you,” said Loki.

One of the soldiers came running around the corner from another side hallway, and the first thing it saw was not the little group of humans moving towards the doors, but the smashed spacecraft model and its fallen comrade.  Loki hefted his stolen plasma rifle and fired, but the weight of the weapon and his lack of familiarity with it meant that he missed.  Instead of hitting the Chi’Tauri, the bolt blew apart the rest of the model spacecraft and most of the carpeted pedestal it had been mounted on, and the element of surprise was lost.  He lined up a second shot right away, but the soldier did something with its own weapon, and there was a flash of glittering pink in the air around it. When Loki fired again, the shot was harmlessly absorbed by this force field.

Steve had no idea what the word Loki barked out in response might mean, but it probably wasn’t something Queen Frigga would have approved of.

“Figure out how to turn that on,” said Thor.

“What do you think I am trying to do?” Loki demanded, studying the weapon in his hands.

Steve scooped up the dish from the remains of the model spacecraft again.  It wasn’t much of a shield, and was cracked and brittle on one side where it had been exposed to the liquid nitrogen, but it was psychologically helpful as they continued to move towards the door.

“They’re going to fire again,” Thor said, peeking around the edge.  “Have you got it yet?”

“I am working on it,” Loki told him.

“We’re trying to save the world here!  Can you two stop bickering?” Natasha demanded.

“No!” the two gods said, in perfect unison.

The alien took a shot at them.  The bolt of plasma went right through the dish, burning a hole in it, and narrowly missed the back of Steve’s head.  The edges of the plastic cooled quickly, but remained black and melted.  He rubbed his scalp to make sure his hair was not on fire, then peeked through the hole and saw two Chi’Tauri now heading towards them.

“Here it is!” said Loki, and the same pink shimmer appeared around them.  “Do you see,” he asked Thor, “how much easier it is to do things when you’re not thundering in my ear?”

It hadn’t been a moment too soon.  Another shot quickly followed the first, but was absorbed by the force field.  Steve dropped the dish, and they began moving with more confidence.

“Return fire!” Thor ordered.

“It won’t let me while the force field is on,” said Loki.  “It would absorb our own shots.”

The front of the building was a set of big glass windows and doors.  A stray shot from one of the Chi’Tauri helpfully shattered these for them, taking out a couple of pillars that Steve thought were probably structural, but they made it outside, staying close to Loki.  Steve’s limp was slowing them all down, but they couldn’t leave him or turn back now.  He wondered where the third remaining Chi’Tauri was.  Hopefully not chasing down escaping NASA employees.

“I see the vehicles!” said Natasha.  “Over there, by the fountain!”

Steve looked.  There they were, two of the alien air scooters floating gently in the air side-by-side, just as they’d been in the parking lot outside the convention centre in Canada.  Only a few more yards now.  They were almost home free.

A widow shattered above them, and the Chi’Tauri commander leaped out.  It landed on its feet in front of them and aimed its staff weapon at the group. Loki held up the plasma rifle as if to use it as a shield.  The Commander fired, and the pink field around them flickered and fizzed like an old television set as it absorbed the blast.  Loki yelped in sudden pain, and threw the rifle onto the grass.  It lay there sparking and smoking.  The staff weapon was far more powerful, and the force field from the rifle couldn’t take the blow.  They were now undefended.

“Scatter!” Steve ordered.  “Leave me, just get there!”

Thor and Natasha darted off in different directions. Thor simply made a wide circle back around to where the vehicles were, while Natasha took a more complicated, weaving route in order to be harder to hit.  Steve, who could not run, had no choice but to stay where he was, leaning on that damned crutch.  Easy prey – but if the Commander killed him, maybe the others could get away.

What would happen if he died, he wondered.  This actor, Chris Evans, would be stuck with his body.  Would he want to come back to this universe and resume his acting career, or would he be willing to stay in the other one and take over the role of Captain America in a more real sense?  Neither seemed like a good idea.

Then he realized that Loki hadn’t run. Instead, the god of mischief and lies stepped in between Steve and the Chi’Tauri commander, calmly facing his enemy. The commander cocked its head and lowered the staff a little.  It must have orders to take Loki alive.

“Really?” Loki said, in a voice suggesting disgust but not surprise.  “You call yourself a warrior, when you’re standing here ready to kill an unarmed, injured man?”

Steve remembered that Loki himself had shot the frozen Chi’Tauri a moment ago.  Then again, Loki had never pretended to be an honourable creature.

“You’re not here for these insects,” Loki said.  “You’re here for me.  Going after them is a waste of time.  Your time, and your master’s.”

Was Loki sacrificing himself to save Steve?  That was ridiculous – and yet as Steve watched, astonished, Loki held up his arms on either side of himself.  The right one was burned, the sleeve of his jacket still smoking from when the rifle had overloaded.

“I am unarmed,” he said, “and I am tired of watching these useless mortals make fools of themselves.  I assume you have my alternate captive.  If you will allow me to take my body back before I face Thanos, I will come with you willingly.”

The Chi’Tauri commander stepped closer, looming even taller over them.  “Two bodies,” it said.  “Thanos can kill you twice!”

Loki stood there a moment longer, straight-backed and defiant, then suddenly threw himself on top of Steve.  From behind, one of the Chi’Tauri flying vehicles ploughed into the commander, literally sweeping it off its feet and throwing it through the broken front windows of the building behind.  That was apparently just a tiny bit more than the structure could take, because the façade sagged, then peeled away like wallpaper to land with an immense crash of glass, concrete, and dust on the pavement in front.  The other two Chi’Tauri, who’d been on their way out, were buried in the mess.

Thor brought the vehicle back around and reached to drag Steve up onto it.  “That was almost Get Help!” he pointed out to Loki.

“I approve,” Loki replied.

Natasha had the other vehicle.  Loki climbed on behind her.  Thor pulled back on the controls to gain altitude, and Steve put his arms around Thor’s middle as they climbed.  Looking down, he could see the three Chi’Tauri picking themselves up out of the collapse, and he quickly looked away as they raised their weapons.

“Far right!” Loki said.  He and Natasha were flying next to Steve and Thor, and Loki reached up past Nat to punch a button on the control panel.  The pink shimmer appeared around them.  Thor did the same.  Plasma bolts bounced off the force fields.

Below them the ground spiralled away until the aliens were lost among the trees, and Steve held on tightly to Thor, feeling terribly exposed.  He’d jumped out of planes with no parachute, but this was different… he was basically balancing on a flying surfboard, with nothing at all to keep him in place.  If he lost his hold, he’d go splat.

Hayley – and Peggy – had made fun of Steve’s propensity for doing very dangerous things, but Steve head learned what was and was not dangerous for him.  He knew when he was likely to survive something, such as jumping out of the Triskelion elevator, and he knew when he was not, such as crashing the Valkyrie.  There was a time for self-sacrificing wanker-hood, and now wasn’t it.  Not when they had so much more to do today.  And if there was no time for that, there was definitely no time to slip and fall.

The Leviathan passed overhead, and for a moment they were in its shadow.  Steve thought he’d remembered how big these things had been, but now that he was up close its size astonished him all over again.  How did this thing stay in the air when it had nothing but those fins, beating gently like the legs of an aquatic insect?  He remembered Loki saying something about an anti-gravity field… Stark would probably be able to figure it out, but for some reason Stark had refused to work on any of the captured Chi’Tauri technology.

He wondered if the reason why not had anything to do with how the Leviathan looked horribly like a living thing.  The teeth in front gave it the appearance of having a blind head, and its undulating body structure looked like a sine.  The Chi’Tauri had built mechanical components into their own bodies to strengthen them.  Had they also knitted biological features into their machines?  Or was this some kind of animal, perhaps a thing that had once swum in an alien ocean before the Chi’Tauri fished it out to turn it into a war machine?

“Oh!” said Natasha.

“What?” asked Steve, but a moment later he found out, as the craft he and Thor were riding gave a sudden jolt and then slowed and steadied, as if being guided through the air by a giant, rock-solid invisible hand.  Thor tried to move the steering control, and could not do it.

“Don’t panic,” said Loki.  “The main computer is guiding us in to dock.”  His voice was calm, but Steve saw him rearrange his hold on his fire extinguisher.  Natasha had the one she’d taken from one of the women, and Thor had a third, slung across his back.  Steve was still carrying one, too, but he would hopefully leave the fighting to the others while he stole the wormhole machine.

Their vehicles separated and moved into line with opposite sides of the Leviathan, matching its speed and sinuous motion exactly as they drew closer and closer.  Steve instinctively brought his arms in, even though there was plenty of space, as they backed into the docking port on the side of the bigger craft. Darkness closed in around them with the walls, and connectors shot out to hook into both sides of the vehicle.  The Leviathan was still moving around them, while in the middle of it they seemed to be sitting perfectly still.