#but I have already mailed/traded one of the originals

[entfremdeteart]

A few mini revenges of

Algea for Delight,

Surfergirl Vampire for Vicci, and

Deer Girl for Evolana!

[strawbaby-jelly]

I got a rather exciting piece of Star Trek history in the mail that I wanted to share!

Note: I am far from a Star Trek historian. What I say here is going based off of mostly old blog posts and fan forums. Apologies in advance if I get information incorrect and feel free to correct me!

“Killing Time”

“Killing Time” by Della Van Hise is #24 of the Star Trek pocketbooks. Published in 1985 the first edition of this book was recalled after a bit of an outcry, apparently in part from Roddenberry himself, as it seemed to imply that Kirk and Spock had something more than a friendship between them. Editions after this remove and replace the “offending” passages.

Though the novel is rather infamous it is sought after by collectors and fans of the Kirk and Spock relationship (like myself.) And though it’s infamous, shunned by Roddenberry and IP holder there are accusations that the plot of the first alternate original series movie was at the least inspired by the novel.

Who is Della Van Hise?

Della Van Hise had an extensive history of writing fanfiction on an old typewriter from a young age. Along with that experience she was known amongst fans that traded their stories back and forth as a rather prolific K/S writer, often publishing fic under pseudonyms. It is apparently fans of these works that encouraged her to submit Killing Time to be officially published. Della went on to have original works published such as poems and novels like “Quantum Shaman.”

According to a Facebook from Della’s wife, Wendy, she passed in March of 2021 after repeated health issues.

At the beginning of “Killing Time” there is a series of acknowledgements. The first of which is to a Wendy.

Just How Rare is this Thing?

The true rarity of this novel is a bit hard to parse in my opinion. There are Star Trek books out there far more expensive, such as “Stitch in Time” by Andrew Robinson. Sources say around 250,000 of copies of the first edition were produced, with 100,000+ having already been shipped before the recall. Copies that were swept up into the recall were destroyed but according to some fan forums many copies did end up on store shelves and were sold. It’s unclear just how many copies of the first edition are left but there are plenty of stories of fans stumbling across the first edition on second-hand bookstore shelves, in thrift stores or even in EBay lots of Star Trek novels sold by people who apparently didn’t know what they had.

As of now this book isn’t worth $100+ and I don’t believe you should buy it for that much if you see a listing for that price. My copy I bought for $60 which $60-70 seems to be the standard accepted value going off past eBay listings. This of course isn’t inexpensive, especially for pocketbooks when you can usually find them for less than $10 in stores and even less online. Unfortunately there doesn’t seem to be a way for fans to enjoy an uncensored copy online if they can’t afford a physical copy. The most I was able to find is this.

A journal entry which compares the uncensored to censored parts of the book.

How do You Know if it’s the First Edition?

So say you’ve run into a copy of this book out in the wild or you’re looking at listings online and are unsure if it’s the recalled edition or not. There are luckily a few quick and easy ways you can figure out if it’s legit.

1. An Embossed Title

Now this way is not always a guarantee if you have a 1st edition copy. Apparently there was some copies that were printed with flat lettering but all first editions I’ve seen of this book through listings and blog posts do always seem to have the raised lettering on the title.

2. Publishing Date

The first edition was published in 1985. If you have a copy or are looking at one that has a publish date past 1985 then it’s not first edition.

3. Page 41 Uncensored

Now this is a guaranteed way to find out if you have a first edition copy. There is a sentence that is only included in the uncensored version on page 41.

“I understand that you were probably playing with dolls and wearing lipstick until you were twenty!”

If you have or have found a copy of “Killing Time” with all these things included then congratulations you’ve got the recalled first edition!

My Thoughts

I am *very* excited to own a copy of this book. It’s been a dream, I know silly, to own it for many years. I’ve avoided spoilers or even having the second edition of this book with the hopes that I would one day own it. I am a K/S fan of course but also as a lesbian I am curious to see if the book is truly as bad in its uncensored state as some claim. Homophobes have a way of blowing up the smallest moments. Some blog posts from the early to mid 2000s claim the book is disgusting and should’ve never been published for its content, others say it’s exaggerated and it’s mostly blink and you miss it moments. I can’t wait to see for myself!

I may leave a review of this novel after reading it. 🖖💖

[seraphica]

A Walkthrough of Project 2025

By Emily Galvin-Almanza, originally on Twitter.

You may have heard the term “Project 2025” floating around, and you may even have cracked open the 900+ page document yourself, only to see a lot of kind of bland, policy-wonk text. So let me crack through the policy-speak and tell you WTF is in this document.

This is, um, a long thread. But if you want a lot of info about Project 2025, all in one place, you've come to the right place.

This document is what Trump and his team will do if elected. It’s their document, their plan, their platform. So like…it’s not *me* saying what they’ll do, this is *them* saying so. documentcloud.org/documents/2408…

Shall we dig in? I’ll organize and give you page numbers. I’m going to start with criminal justice stuff (of course) and then we’ll wander through other topics like repro rights (none), discrimination (fine, unless it’s against nuclear power), environmental protection (gone), etc

Predictably, this is a document full of states-rights claims, but (true to form) there is very little left to the states when it comes to a Trump criminal legal system.

Generally, the Constitution reserves criminal law to the states, allowing localities to create criminal accountability as they see fit. But under a Trump regime, “small government” just means “no EPA or medicare and HUGE expansions of DOJ’s criminal division power.”

A primary target? The discretion and decision-making of local prosecutors.

Prosecutorial discretion is part of the foundation of our legal system—the idea that the people elect their prosecutor, and can elect (or not elect) a person whose judgment they agree with when it comes to what to focus on when it comes to criminal prosecution.

The Trump DOJ will basically override local voters and prosecutors, bringing federal charges where they deem states not punitive enough. (553)

I should note that this is a ridiculous, massively difficult thing to do—our criminal court system is spread across 3,143 counties.

So what it really means is that the Trump DOJ will troll for cases they find politically meaningful, and use the full weight of the federal government to prosecute specific individuals who stand for stuff they don’t like.

They’re not just going to take on targeted prosecutions, they’re also going to legally come after prosecutors who they feel aren’t prosecuting enough. (553) It’s like this, but EVERYWHERE politico.com/news/2024/04/1…

And somehow they’re also going to do everything they can to make sentences harsher, and increase utilization of the death penalty (553-554).

They’re going to double down on the war on drugs, prosecuting interstate drug cases much more harshly (and by “interstate drug trade” they also mean “mailing abortion pills”) (555, 562).

They will also take election integrity out of the hands of the Civil Rights Division and put it in to DOJ’s criminal division (563), which means you see a lot more cases like Crystal Mason’s, but at a federal level: nytimes.com/2024/03/28/us/…

The long and short of it is, we often think of “prosecution of political enemies” as, like, Donald Trump sending DOJ after Liz Cheney or Rachel Maddow or something. And we forget that this can also mean persecution of ordinary people like Crystal Mason.

People who are not high profile themselves, but whose conduct (or even mistake!) is in a subject matter area that makes them the political target. Under this regime, being in a state that would not choose to prosecute them may be no help.

It’s also important to remember the ramifications of highly punitive policies. A DOJ that seeks the max on every case, seeks the death penalty, increases immigration detention (below), is a federal government expanding (& lining the pockets of) the prison industrial complex.

We already live in a country where basically all social ills are funneled into our criminal court system. SCOTUS just increased that trend by allowing people who are living on the street with nowhere else to go to be prosecuted for…existing…outdoors.

But in this administration, we can see an expansion of what is criminal. You’ll see a lot of Torquemada-esque interrogatory stuff in the doc (especially at Treasury?!) but the most obvious expansion of the criminal system is into the zone of women’s health.

In other words, reproductive rights? Never heard of her. The document is pretty fixated on abortion, unsurprisingly, with plans to end all forms of abortion access (including pills) throughout the document (6, 104, 284, 450, 455 - 459, 503 - 529, 562)

There’s one point I’d like to hit on in particular: this week SCOTUS punted a case back to Idaho which was covered as a case allowing emergency abortions to save a woman's life.

But in fact, that's not what really happened here---the Court punted the issue back to the Circuit court, leaving the question of whether women need to be actively dying to receive an abortion open.

Reminder: long as there is legal uncertainty, there are doctors doing nothing while wondering what they're supposed to do as a woman lies bleeding and septic on their table. msmagazine.com/2024/06/28/emt…

The fact of the matter is, under a Trump administration, they could (and would) simply choose to stop fighting to make hospitals to offer abortion in cases where it is necessary to save a woman's life.

They could simply stop fighting for EMTALA, the statute that says hospitals that get federal dollars have to offer emergency care.

And also, in Project 2025, they want to go even farther than that, farther than banning abortion. They want to MAKE SURE DOCTORS DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO DO IT.

Specifically, this doc makes the Dept of Health and Human Services responsible for ensuring that training for doctors, nurses, and doulas doesn’t include anything about abortion (485-486).

Oh also DOJ is going to be the Abortion Police and go after anyone mailing abortion pills (562).

Side note: I don’t actually disagree with ensuring more coverage for things relating to women’s preventative healthcare but Project 2025 weirdly endorsing the rhythm method is hilarious

So they're gonna make you have all these babies. Who is going to take care of these babies? Were you thinking maybe you could get access to daycare? Oh no, mama, we want YOU to take care of the babies. What’s that? You had a job? Don’t you worry your pretty little head about it.

HHS now, under Trump, thinks the gay agenda is destroying families, but the presence of a biological father can prevent all manner of bad things up to and including teen pregnancy (presumably because dad is going to meet your date at the door with a shotgun)

But also….having an adult male father figure who is NOT your bio dad is apparently the worst and most evil thing in the world. BAN BOYFRIENDS.

The Trump administration would like to make the federal government close its eyes, put its fingers in its ears, and hum loudly when anyone says “gender." Specifically...

...they will scrub out any mention of the existence of trans/nonbinary/LGBTQIA+ Americans in federal agencies, policies, regulations, and legislation (4-5, 62, 259, 333, 475).

To quote, “the terms sexual orientation and gender identity (“SOGI”), diversity, equity, and inclusion (“DEI”), gender, gender equality, gender equity, gender awareness, gender-sensitive, abortion, reproductive health, reproductive rights”

These terms are getting cut “out of every federal rule, agency regulation, contract, grant, regulation, and piece of legislation that exists.” (p 4-5)

Damn, who's the language police now?

This document—in a quest to be really, really fundamentalist about gender identity—also completely abandons the idea of supporting gender equality as a whole. Efforts to protect women and girls internationally? Hell no.

Like, USAID should “remove all references, examples, definitions, photos, and language on USAID websites, in agency publications and policies, and in all agency contracts and grants that include the following terms"

And the terms are “gender,” “gender equality,” “gender equity,” “gender diverse individu- als,” “gender aware,” “gender sensitive” (259)

They would very much like to kick trans people—and anyone gender nonconforming!---out of the military (103-104). Remember Demi Moore in GI Jane? Yeah the second she gets that buzz cut she’s OUT.

What about race discrimination, you say? Well, we will have no idea, because the Trump administration plans to stop collecting any data about that. The EEOC will stop collecting data about race entirely (583).

BTW when I say this is a tricky document, this is what I mean...

The document justifies ditching any data collection by saying that “Crudely categorizing employees by race or ethnicity fails to recognize the diversity of the American workforce and forces individuals into categories that do not fully reflect their racial and ethnic heritage.”

Which at first glance, a person could be like, yes! Racial identity is complex! Let’s not put people in boxes!

But then you step back and realize that NO LONGER HAVING DATA ABOUT WHETHER BLACK AND BROWN PEOPLE ARE OR ARE NOT GETTING HIRED does exactly ZERO GOOD THINGS it just makes us UNABLE TO TELL IF BAD THINGS ARE HAPPENING.

The document is full of this—really normal-sounding pablum that actually means “we are choosing to have no idea whether Black and Brown people are being shut out of the workforce, why would the government want to know that?”

The government doesn’t need to know! Because they don’t think disparate impact—when a particular group is disadvantaged in the workplace—matters anyway!

They would “eliminate disparate impact as a valid theory of discrimination for race and other bases under Title VII and other laws. Disparities do not (and should not legally) imply discrimination per se.” (583).

BTW on this point they get hella hella weird about the idea of racial equity at the Treasury Dept…where they would essentially like to have an Inquisition:

Essentially, under this administration, any agency that wants to think about whether race is playing a role in the fairness of their sector can GTFO.

If you go into the original doc and search for “DEI” you basically enter a forest of grandpas yelling I DON’T SEE COLOR YOU CAN BE BLACK WHITE GREEN PURPLE OR POLKA DOT FOR ALL I CARE

BTW you were hoping that a Democratic Senate could be an effective check of some kind, first thing in this doc is that they want to kind of tell the Senate to F off

Specifically, the plan is to get Trump-loyalist appointees into position, scrap the Senate confirmation process for a lot of these appointees and let the rest start working even before Senate confirmation. (p136-137, 173)

All of the agency heads are clearly designated as political in this doc, not expert/neutral. So EPA (428), DOJ (560), FBI (552), HUD (508), DOL (615)...basically the doc calls for the insertion of as many loyalists as possible

And yes, the job of these loyalists is, in many cases, to dismantle the agency they head.

I don’t really know where to categorize this, so I’ll put it here: they think the Department of Homeland Security suffers from “wokeness.” I’m not making that up, they said in black-and-white serif font. I can’t make this stuff up. Page 135.

So like, to be clear, in the same breath as they’re talking about the wokeness of DHS, they would also like to reinstate the Border Patrol officers (who work under DHS mind you) who were accused of galloping up on migrant families and whipping them from horseback.

“CBP should restart & expand use of the horseback-mounted Border Patrol. As part of this announcement, the Secretary should clear the records & personnel files of those who were falsely accused by Sec. Alejandro Mayorkas of whipping migrants and issue a formal apology” (139).

FWIW what they’re referring to is some CBP agents who nearly trampled a kid and used their reins in a way that was, er, whip-like (and before you accuse ME of being overly sensitive, I have ridden exactly this way in my life BUT I WAS MOVING CATTLE NOT HUMAN BEINGS.) politico.com/news/2022/07/0…

Anyway, because DHS is too woke, they need to shrink it down until it mostly just detains and deports immigrants.

They’re gonna bust its union and remove most of its programs and privatize both the TSA and also FEMA’s flood insurance program so you can get bilked if you live in a region prone to flooding (shhhh don’t say the floods are due to climate change).

SPEAKING OF CLIMATE, we’re definitely going back to the same “if you don’t have any information about the problem, the problem cannot exist” strategy they use on race.

To that end, they would like to get rid of Offices of: Domestic Climate Policy (61) Interagency Working Group on the Social Cost of Carbon (SCC) (61) Clean Energy Demonstration (381) The Clean Energy Corps (386) Environmental Justice & External Civil Rights (442)

This means getting rid of climate efforts in foreign aid programs (257), stopping the USDA’s efforts to focus on sustainable food production (293—who will need to eat in 20 years anyway? Certainly not our children, they will have evolved to photosynthesize and graze on plastic)

Anyway they’re getting rid of energy efficiency standards for appliances (378) as well as cutting down all EPA activity related to climate change, including repealing the Inflation Reduction Act programs providing grants for environmental science activities (440)

BTW, I think it’s worth noting that there are a lot of things stated as binaries that aren’t binary. Ending energy efficiency requirements for appliances, for example, to focus on cycle time and reparability.

I also want a right to repair! I also hate it that my car’s internal computer makes it really hard to work on my own car! I just think that we, as consumers, have the right to demand BOTH and this doc incorrectly insists that we have to CHOOSE.

I don’t have to choose between repairing an appliance that massively pollutes the planet or having an energy efficient one that will lower my bills but break every two years. WE CAN DEMAND BOTH. False binaries are a sneaky, crappy constant in this document.

I’m highlighting them in particular because false binaries are also a way of dividing us. There are things I can agree with conservative friends on…literally Monday I was having a fun, productive, common-ground convo w/a conservative friend. False binaries are toxic bullshit.

Toxic ideas abound in here. You know how TX created an abortion regulation scheme that incentivized members of the public to effectively be abortion bounty hunters? Project 2025 would do the same for *science.*

Project 2025 would incentivize citizens to come after scientists under the False Claims Act for research misconduct. This is p 438. Fun times!

This is all part of diluting expertise so that the scientists who are trying to warn us about massive danger ahead can get drowned out by “citizen scientists” whose research the EPA will…equally prioritize??? 438.

Housing and Urban Development also gets their climate programs cut (508) because, much like food, who will need housing in the future? We will return to caves, as we should.

Oh, if how much oil drilling the US is doing matters to you as a voter, Project 2025 basically says maximum drilling, all the drilling, all the time (523-524).

Just a quick note in case you were thinking this was a serious policy document: note the contrast between the doc’s desire to let states drill as much as they want bc “States are better resource managers than the federal government because they must live with the results” (524)

And revoking CA’s ability to set its own air quality standards (627)…because…states…shouldn’t be allowed to self-regulate, I guess, if their regulations make things harder for the oil industry?

Oh also they’re gonna freeze all EPA activity which wasn’t Congressionally authorized on Day One (436). How often does stuff get through Congress anymore? This one echoes the recent SCOTUS decision which also strips regulatory authority.

Basically more drilling, no windmills, don’t even think about encouraging electric cars (286).

Also open season on wolves and bears (534) and let’s just mass execute America’s wild horses (529)

To break it down, if you, like me, are a mom who is concerned about the quality of water your kids are drinking at school, and wants the gov’t to be quickly responsive to new discoveries and problems (like PFAS!) that might give your kids cancer, well, you’re fucked.

If there’s a new thing that is discovered that we should regulate/know about, too bad, because of things like this: “Remove the Greenhouse Gas Reporting Program (GHGRP) for any source category that is not currently being regulated.” (425).

Climate, of course, impacts migration. The more the US contributes to climate catastrophe, the more the consequences will be felt by the developing world, particularly in regions close to the equator and low-lying regions.

What will we do about immigration? Build more prisons for immigrants (142), send unaccompanied children away (148) increase the fees to apply for asylum + generally make immigration more expensive (146) & make it so gang violence & domestic violence no longer justify asylum (148)

Cut funding for NGOs that help immigrants find safety, and instead spend that on walls and jails (149).

Eliminate prosecutorial discretion on immigration cases (150). Oh and we’re doing the head-in-sand thing again by eliminating the office that tracks immigration jailing. 165. They don’t want an “impediment to detention.”

For Americans who rely on government programs to do things like feed their children, keep a roof over their heads, or get healthcare, things will also get worse.

They really hate healthcare: “In essence, our deficit problem is a Medicare and Medicaid problem.” (283).

Even though they want people to have a lot of babies, they’re putting in new requirements on SNAP (299), reducing eligibility for Medicaid (467), cutting school lunch programs (302-303), and eliminating Head Start (482).

Oh and also fuck Sesame Street (247) (and public broadcasting generally).

Safe baby formula? Not a priority. “As for baby formula regulations generally, labeling regulations and regulations that unnecessarily delay the manufacture and sale of baby formula should be re-evaluated.” (302).

Speaking of schools, they’re going to get rid of the Dept of Education, which they say is “a convenient one-stop shop for the woke education cartel,“ (285, 319).

Instead of schools, let’s give teens more dangerous jobs. “Some young adults show an interest in inherently dangerous jobs...DOL should amend its hazard-order regulations to permit teenage workers access to work in regulated jobs with proper training and parental consent.” (595).

There’s kind of a sharp contrast here between high trust of parents in some contexts (to let their kids work dangerous jobs) and low trust of parents in others (if a father isn’t father-y enough terminate parental rights as fast as you can (481-482)).

Obviously, the Biden efforts to forgive student loans are toast (354) but also public service loan forgiveness is toast! “End time-based and occupation-based student loan forgiveness.” (361).

Having a job may be overrated anyway, and so the Trump Admin will tell the Fed to only think about price stability, eliminating full employment as an economic goal (661). Actually WTH maybe abolish the federal reserve completely (also 661).

Oh also if you were looking forward to lower drug costs, they want to end the program where the gov’t can negotiate lower prescription drug costs. 465.

As a matter of fact, no one will protect consumers against fraud and dangerous products under this admin…they are going to eliminate the CFPB completely and return consumer protection to banking regulators who are SO GOOD AT CONSUMER PROTECTION OF COURSE (/s/) 839.

Education, of course, is critical to the ability to distinguish misinformation. Under Trump, we better get ready for a lot more disinfo, because they’re going to yank federal efforts to combat misinfo/disinfo online. Facebook free for all, now with AI generated videos! (155, 550)

Speaking of misinfo, there will be no more independent Federal Election Commission.

Headed by a Trump official (with or without Senate confirmation!) the FEC will only investigate claims the Trump administration wants investigated, and remove its authority to decide what to litigate by handing that over to DOJ. (803, 865)

Oh also the new president will have to have a way to quickly deal with any ongoing, er, litigation, like, uh, criminal cases (but also ongoing litigation that conflicts with his agenda, like, say, civil rights consent decrees or environmental enforcement litigation. (28)

In the name of EXPEDIENCY, they say, the President’s lawyer (the White House Counsel) should give high-level super fast advice without wasting time on, like, researched legal memos or anything.

In other words, what Trump does will be on the advice of a counsel who doesn’t write stuff down. Not great!

Oh also the person chosen need not have fancy credentials (oh okay I'm all for that) as long as they’re LOYAL (oh wait no). Also p 28.

I’m sorry to tell you guys this, but this is like…scratching the surface. This is the beginning. This is the stuff you should know now.

If there is something you care about in this world, I think you should dip into this document and search for it, because you might find something hideous. documentcloud.org/documents/2408…

[original thread]

[baby-jaguar]

Part 1: Meeting John Price

Western AU; Mail Order Spouse Trope

WC: 3,131 CW: None

AN: My beloved! John Price! Would love to hear your thoughts and comments, as well as any questions. I hope ye enjoy <3

Please see the following for the explanation and precursors to the scene!

Introduction, Biography

--------

Truthfully, you’re glad you didn't have many friends in town, as it meant no one to share unnecessary secrets with, nor did it spread any word of what you were up to in your free time. 

However, that isn’t to say that you trusted at least some people in the small town you lived in, such as your boss.

A scapegoat for you to write your correspondence letters was that you simply had to stay late on the farm, working extra long hours because of something that was messed up, or because you knew your parents wouldn’t argue with the fact that you were getting more money.

Feeling that you were a decent enough candidate for John to consider since you are working as a farm hand already, you decided to write your first correspondence the next day. Once sent, you received a letter back from him four days later and by god, did he sound like such a gentleman. 

You were able to soon confide in him on how you wanted to leave town, start fresh, but stick with what you know since you did work on the well-known “Loyal Laswell Farm,” and help out around their farmhouse with common jobs such as sewing, cooking, and even making a dirty barn looked organized- a man’s dream spouse.

With only two weeks passing and less than a handful of letters to be traded, you already had money and an open invitation to John’s ranch. Through your correspondence, John stated that he had already known of Kate Laswell, her having been a long ago buyer from him and even she had sought out advice on taking care of her lambs long ago. 

John connected the dots and realized that you were the trusty youngling that she hired early on; He already trusted your morale if Laswell had kept you after all this time. (And if Laswell did gloat about you once in a while, that was a secret between her and John.) After finding out about the mutual connection, you confided in her. 

Kate, already knowing of your family’s vices, was pleasantly surprised by your major turn of life events and how quickly your fate had been granted to you in the form of Price. She made sure your head was screwed on straight enough that if it didn’t work out, you could mail her and she would help you figure it out from there…

Kate’s wife chimed in and said you and Price would be a great fit.

The two women gave their aid to you in the form of gifting you your favorite horse to ride off on during your long journey. You only brought a handful of items from your parent's house, slowly, and used the remaining amounts of wardrobe you kept at the farm to pack up. With two bags packed and some food, feed, a gun being courtesy of Laswell’s wife, and a celebratory pack of cigars for John (Kate’s wedding gift), you were on your way. 

It only took you a week by horseback, luckily traveling near the Oregon Trail that had already had sorted paths cleared and lived-in, you only needed to stop when you and your horse did. You were able to send John updated letters, but were not able to receive them due to constantly being on the move. This left you daydreaming about him.

John wrote that he is originally from Deadwood, South Dakota. He comes from a long line of lawmen and followed in their footsteps in his early adult life. However, as John became sheriff and notorious for his hardened but fair demeanor, he began to see the justice system slip through the cracks right in front of him. Murderers would walk away and many left unjustly prosecuted in other cases. It angered and dwelled on him so much that he retired early on. John soon found his solace in the quiet mountain town of Pitkin, Colorado. John describes himself as a proud man who is protective and respectful, an old soul who loves his whiskey - and is looking for his strawberry wine. He is a weathered man who can fix any problems of yours, all at the cost of a shoulder to lean on and someone to spend the rest of his days with.

Coming into Pitkin, it brings forth a small town nestled within luscious green mountains and a strip of shops down the main road that highlights most of the town's activity. Riding through, you were an obvious sight to be had; a new face set out on a horse with minimal bags packed on the back. You didn’t seem like a traveler, no, you seemed like someone who was on a mission to find something- someone. 

Smiling and giving small nods towards those who stare, your cheeks have a faint blush from the attention as you ride down the strip and toward the end of the town. Soon, the signs have a label of a bull, a common connotation of a ranch, causing you to garner up a bit more hope and hold your head high as you click your horse into a canter. 

The sound of your horse's hooves thundering on the ground cannot beat the thrum of your heart; riding over the hill, you’re greeted with a breathtaking view of the Alpine mountains that dip into a valley with an absurd amount of leveled planes that make you believe the land was spread flat by an inviting entity. Your eyes come into focus on small black dots that move before you make out to be the shape of cattle grazing across the green and flowing grass.

There sits a house atop the hill that is before the dip of the valley, where a fence surrounds a large barn that is directly adjacent to the house. You bring your horse to a slow walk as you take in the view of the wooden house; it's a cabin-styled home but large in the additions that have been formed around the sides, making it one of the bigger houses in town. The barn rivals its size by double, and the open stalls along the side let you glimpse into the hay-filled homes of horses that linger near the fences. You have to do a double take when you see movement in the barn that is all too human-like, then pulling the reigns of your horse once a few feet away from the entrance to stop and watch. 

A man stands, low grunts leaving him as he stretches his back before grabbing a hay bayle and beginning to break it up. He wears a worn-out pair of jeans and a cowboy hat as his low whistling breaks the silence between the surrounding horses neighing at your new appearance. In an instant, you know immediately this is John.

To your surprise, your horse greets the others in a sharp jeer of noise, causing him to turn around in surprise his eyes dart up at you.

For a second, you’re humored at the look he gives, not expecting something so sweet as you to ride into his ranch and most likely expecting someone within the town to come to bother him. 

But in an instant, he knows exactly who you are. 

After his shock wears off, he sets down the hay and reaches up to take his cowboy hat off and place it on his chest as he walks toward you. Letting out a low whistle, his eyes roam over you with an enamored stare. “God was just showin’ off when he made you, sweetheart.” Comes the low timbre of his voice, sending a small fire of desire shimmying through your vertebrae. 

A soft smile graces your face in return, halting your horse for the time being as he comes up to you. “Good morning sir, would I be right to assume that you are John Price, the owner of this ranch?” You ask after a moment of your eyes trailing over him, taking in his face and ice-blue eyes while he approaches to help you down from your horse.

“That I am, Sweetheart. And I suppose you’re the one that I’ve been lookin’ so forward to meetin’, that right?” He asks in return, a small smirk taking his lips while he helps you lower down from the saddle. You smile at the extended hand, taking it as you swing your opposite leg out of the stirrup while feeling the touch of his other hand coming to caress your hip in a gentle fashion.

"I hope you've been as comfortable as one can be on a week-long ride," John comments softly, keeping his hand on you once you're firmly planted on the ground as his eyes scan you from head to toe. "How you feelin’?" He asks sweetly, now finding your eyes with genuine affection in his tone.

In response to his lingering touch on your hip, and feeling it travel to your waist with a brief squeeze before he lets it fall, you give him a small squeeze of the hand you're holding to. “Not too shabby; was able to get a room a few of the nights along the way. I’m thankful for the good weather I had while getting here.” You respond as you shift your saddle-sore hips for a moment and reorient your limbs to standing. 

"You're not so shabby yourself, sweet thing'." He compliments softly as he releases you, then grabs your horse’s bridle and releases the bit before attaching his own lead to it, and a small feeling of surprise crosses your mind at how easily he handles new horses. Then, gesturing for you to follow him. "Come on. Let me show you around." John leads with comfortable confidence, letting your horse sniff him while leading him to an open stall with some water and feed. 

“Thank you for letting me bring my stallion here, Laswell gifted him to me when I was sayin’ goodbye. Said you may remember him from when he was a foal?” You prompt with a tilt of curiosity at the edge of your words while you join them in the stall to unload your bags and take the saddle off.

Looking back towards him, his eyes are looking over the horse for any identifiers, hints that would make him remember. “Not quite sure I remember this one, sweetheart. He got a name?” John asks in response once finished doing a sweepdown of his mane and a quick swipe of his hair coat.

“Laswell said he’s always been named Captain.” You answer curtly, now looking to see his reaction, if any.

It takes a moment for you to narrow in on the way the left side of his mustache twitches slightly before he breaks out into an all-out smile. “Well, I’ll be damned…” John trails out as he moves back towards Captain's head.

His blue eyes shine in the light of the barn windows, meeting yours for a moment while a boyish charm takes over his face. “This slick bastard got you all the way over to me?” John speaks with a gruffness that intertwines with amusement; the way his hands move to rub over the horse's forehead and nose showcases a glimpse of a gentle side reserved for his animals.

As you scrunch your eyebrows up in confusion, John catches your expression and gives a hearty chuckle in response. “I helped birth this one the day that Kate came up here to buy some lambs. Her wife was cryin’, thinking that him and his momma were gonna die.” He answers before moving to give Captain a pat on his chest, a huff of his breath coming out in response. 

“He had both him’s front legs back during contractions. Had to help the mare by pushing his fat head on in to get him to readjust. Kate and her wife saw the whole thing.” He finishes with a hum and a distant look in his eyes only for a second, now coming back to your side and picking up a bag of yours.

“This all you got? Woulda expected a bit more from a woman movin' out west, especially to the cold mountains.” He states with a cocked eyebrow, eyeing as you bend down to hoist the remaining bag over your shoulder. You both give Captain a farewell tap before exiting the stall and heading towards Johns's house.

You wait on replying for a moment as you take a longer look at the structure, noting the wooden panels that exude a warm and weathered patina, a testament to the house's endurance against the harsh elements of the wild. The front features a symmetrical facade, with a steeply pitched gable roof that displays a combination of wooden shingles and iron accents. Windows are evenly placed on the front-facing sides of the house, and shutters open to allow glimpses into the inside.

“Didn’t have a lot to bring if I’m being honest. Just packed up what I liked and wanted, then left.” You answer with a confident nod, leaving it at that. “I did plan on finding some new or old fabrics to start making winter coats for myself.” You add on quickly, thinking over how quickly the chill must set in within the mountain valley.

You follow John onto the front porch of the house, “Ah, you do some of that fancy work or just plain work?” He inquires while gesturing for you to step inside the entrance. You’re greeted by a spacious entryway, designed to be practical and modest. The floors, made of polished wide planks, creak softly under the added weight of yourself next to John, a new soul to provide protection to in the house.

To the front of the entryway, is his living room, its centerpiece being a grand stone fireplace, providing warmth and comfort during the chilly evenings. Leather upholstered furniture invites warmth to the house, and you can see a good amount of hides used as a rug and even a throw blanket over the couch, while ornate coffee cans and some intricately shaped vases linger around the surfaces. 

The sound of your mouth opening and closing resonates in the silence of you two standing there before John shuts the door softly behind you and ultimately snaps you out of your daze. “Um, just some plain work. Never had the time or materials to work on some fancy clothes, would rather make things I know I’m gonna use.” You answer while moving to face adjacent to where he stands in front of the door.

His eyes track your own as your attention comes back to rest on him, a small smirk tugging on the edge of his mouth. With a quick laugh, he moves to place his left hand along your back, his cold fingers sliding to the place between your shoulders. “Welcome home, Sweetheart.” He smiles while speaking softly, leaning over to place a light kiss atop your head. 

When he moves back from your space, which you want to ultimately follow as you feel his warmth radiate next to you and already adore the way his voice dips impossibly lower when speaking so gently, his hand slides down to the small of your back and gives a small tap to lead you forward. “Come on, let's get you settled in.” He beckons you while walking to a door that is adjacent to the entrance.

Walking in, John’s bedroom exudes a haven, signifying his rest and relaxation at the end of the day. The warm, earthy tones of the wood and furniture create an internal warmth, in contrast to the view of the surrounding mountains of green and glimpse over the cattle that wander the land, the windows laden with lace curtains.

The bed was the average size for the master bedroom; The double bed sat its headboard against the wall to the right of the entrance, facing the windows. A large red quilt adorns the bed while the bed itself is a robust wooden frame with upright pieces of carved and sanded wood posted taller at each corner of the bed.

In the corner is another stone fireplace, where an armchair sits to serve as a place for John to unwind, read a book, or reflect on the day. A well-worn wooden dresser stands against one wall, its surface adorned with a few cherished mementos - a faded photograph of him on a horse, a weathered pocket watch that has seen countless sunsets, and a small collection of polished rocks, each one possibly a reminder of a special moment.

"It's not much." He pauses before speaking again, his tone becoming more personal. "And I'd love to have you share my bed when you're comfortable. However, if you need time to adjust, I can set myself up in the living room. I don't wish to pressure you if you're not comfortable yet."

The sweet and respectful offer doesn’t fly over you, and a small smile rises over your lips. “Thank you, John. That’s awfully considerate of everything you’re doing for me. I don’t want to burden you with sleeping on your own couch, I wouldn't mind.” You answer while slowly walking to the dresser, placing your bag down by the foot of it.

“It may take a few days to adjust and get to know you, but-” you take a second to turn around and look at his form with a small shy smile, “I don’t think I’ll keep you waiting long.” You finish as a soft blush rises to the apples of your cheeks. Your hands come to interlace together in the front of your lap as his heavy footsteps make their way towards you with a bright smile that borders a smirk.

He stops in front of you, holding eye contact as he places your other bag down. “Ain’t no way in hell I’d be letting you sleep on the couch, sweetheart. But, I do look forward to hearing your answer. When you’re ready for it.” He speaks in a gruff voice, eyebrows raised to make sure you're taking his answer to heart and understanding, his warm hands moving to enclose both of yours within his grasp.

Bringing your hands up to his lips, you watch with rapt attention at his mouth puckering and in turn, making his facial hair move in the action, then leaving a warm and gentle kiss on the back of each hand.

His eyes don’t stray from yours while doing so, his blue eyes bring an inviting wave of ice- the kind you actively seek when you’re feeling too hot or need to wake up. “Now, how about I show you the rest of the ranch, babydoll?” He asks with a soft grin, pulling you just a fraction closer by the grip of your hands.

[seat-safety-switch]

The humble potato is man’s greatest ally against the forces of nature. This calorie-packed fistful of carbohydrates has been specifically bred by our ancestors to offer an easy solution to needing to eat. You can throw these suckers out your car while hauling the mail down the highway, and they’ll grow. Right there in the drainage ditch, year after year, forever, slowly taking over the biosphere.

Or at least that’s what I was told. A couple years ago, I decided to try and grow my own potatoes. Those billionaire turbo-fash ruling our grocery stores from their orbiting space stations had raised prices on staples one too many times, and it was my turn to take the mouldy Yukon Golds at the back of my fridge and bury them in the Earth. Like my proud forebears, I too would become a subsistence farmer, hewing food out of the very earth itself.

Friends, this manic urge lasted for about five seconds. And then I went back inside to try and find the loose float bowl for a Honda Monkey’s carb (it was in my cutlery drawer.) I forgot about it all summer, and then the next fall. In the middle of the night in November, I briefly remembered my spud project, but I soon forgot again. Then, the next fall, I had to move a front k-frame from a Thunderbird out of that corner of the yard, in the vain hope that the rat-infested 302 mounted to it was still a viable enough core to net me a Craigslist trade for a primo Mopar thermostat housing. And that’s where I saw it. Poking through the Earth were the leaves and flowers of my potato plant, struggling to reach sunlight.

I didn’t want to dig it up. I was afraid. I didn’t want to see that I had somehow failed at the anyone-can-do-it, super-easy introductory gardening project. And yet – I had visitors coming. Visitors from the newspaper. Perhaps they would want a baked potato. They would think glowingly of me and the profile would not immediately open with a story about my degenerate behaviour and generally erratic coot-like ideology. The fame might make people turn up to see my hoard of shit-box cars, at which point I could sneak out and remove their differentials while they weren’t looking. With a new resolve, I dug up the potatoes using an old fender liner, and washed them using the neighbour’s hose. They were perfect.

I’d like to tell you that my dinner with the newspaperman went well. Unfortunately, I didn’t have quite enough time to cook the potatoes, and especially not to boil off all the various solvents, oils, and heavy metals that had accreted in my soil (already marked for “reclamation by some other sucker” by the original owners) over the years. Sometimes I forget that not everyone has become as inured to the contaminants as I have. Weak stomachs and all that.

On the plus side, I had a handy new hole in my yard in which to dispose of the evidence. In a couple years, I’ll be able to wear their clothes without anyone becoming too suspicious – they were about my size, and it’ll save me a few bucks at the thrift store. They say gardening takes patience, after all.

[thirst2]

It's been said, before, and I think anyone remotely familiar with open-source has experienced or heard it but I'm still always taken aback by how much technological infrastructure was built to be general-purpose and malleable by the common user and how much corporations obfuscated and erased this.

Even in the tagging system for .mp3 files – ID3, an open standard –, I'm finding all kinds of functionality they accounted for that makes a lot of sense for a music file to specify (like lyrics synch.ed to timestamps and being able to specify events in the song like the outro or intro or the refrain or an interlude).

And I was just completely unaware of them because no music player on Windows ever offered them (alright; I mostly used iTunes, at the time, but the point stands).

iTunes saves any ratings you apply to songs in its own database; I never used the system in part because I've never found a need but, primarily, because I didn't want to invest a bunch of time and effort into something I'd lose the second I switched music players.

Oh; but did you know ID3 (v2) has a rating tag? One that iTunes could have used and then I'd take my ratings wherever I take my files with me?

Not only that but rating for a song are marked by an E-mail of the person rating; I expect it was largely to provide a unique identifier of some sort (and very 90s/00s to assume an E-mail is one's primary form of unique ID) but that means that songs can be rated by multiple people.

When your friends give you a copy of their favorite songs on a USB drive, those songs would've had their ratings.

Like a lot of tech. (especially early) architecture, this part fails to account for the presence of bad actors and spam but it also means you could reach out to those who rated the song, before you; their E-mail's right there.

Back when we traded AOL handles and the notion of communicating with those you knew but weren't nearby was exciting and new, we could have reached out to the friend of a friend of a friend at school who'd rated the song before handing it off until it reached us.

Even – now –, accounting for not wanting to attach your E-mail to a file that you'd, then, have to worry about getting into hands which might abuse that personal info. about you, being able for multiple people to tag a song is cool.

If I setup a Raspberry Pi at home and setup the Music Player Daemon on it for Jude and I to both put our songs on to listen to, etc., we could both tag the songs with our ratings and see what the other thought of the music we were sharing.

Like…this is some cool functionality ideas; this is some nice architecture. You just need the players to implement the functionality.

But they didn't; iTunes setup their own rating system (whether to tie people to their music player or not, I have no idea) and I never bothered to use what could be a sort of communal feature.

When I get excited about tech., these are the things that initially drew me to it – the ability to not only make my life, as a spoonie, easier but the ability to make all kinds of stuff we do everyday easier and with more people and to connect us all even more.

From the ability to making things more accessible without having to rely on others as much for it to…I dunno; the possibilities are endless.

Instead, the sheer joy so many of my generation had at creating their personal web pages by playing around with HTML and CSS became harder to construct because these businesses didn't care to make these experiences accessible because they didn't make them money.

I will never not be angry about that.

In any case, I'm at the point where anything further I might say is something I've already said before here on the subject; but I'm going to have these other tags be more accessible in my player. There's some really neat functionality in there that someone might want to utilize if presented in a more user-friendly manner (the original job of the music player implementations, to begin with…).

[thelightningthatjumpsbetween]

Twenty

RE8 | Wintersberg | Romance, Slow Burn | Action, Sci-Fi

Sequel of Winters and the Beast, a Resident Evil: Village Story

Table Of Contents

Ethan's Journal

August 31

Today started off by getting stabbed by someone who looked almost identical to Karl.  Turns out it was his identical twin.  What I don’t understand is what he said when he stabbed me.  Who tells somebody “Don’t cave” and then stabs them?? 

The good news is that I healed fast…we have time to figure out how to help the Mutamycete without sending Eva back. 

I do feel pain around where the wound was, but hopefully that will go away soon too. Eva says I might be healing fast because I know how to ‘focus’ on healing now.  

Karl has been with Donna most of the day.  It was weird how she just randomly started remembering her life, and it happened faster than mine did.  Karl has been sad all day too, but he won’t say much–Typical.  At least Rose is in a good mood!  We played outside until the storm clouds showed up.  And now I’ve been sorting through the things we got in the mail.  It’s nice to have a break from thinking about “Mold stuff”. 

Then around 5, we got more visitors.  Maricara, Alina, and Lidia!  It is so great to see them.  They haven’t stopped by since Rose’s party.  Maricara said that the Duke was in their village to trade, and told her about Donna.  She came with a basket of fabric, a big sewing kit and a bunch of supplies. I guess they’re going to try to help Donna with some project.  Maricara knew her real mom so Donna has someone to talk to about her family.  They’re the best kind of people.  I offered them all their old rooms upstairs, they’re going to stay for the weekend.  

So even though the day started out pretty bad, it’s looking up. Let’s hope it stays that way.  

Karl and I are going to the field tonight. I'm happy that he’s finally on board with confronting Miranda even if we’re not ready to fight her yet.  She can’t come into this world and I believe Godric when he says she can’t take Rose either. All I can hope is that Karl gets answers about his brother.  I’ve never seen him so agitated, unless you count after I killed “Sturm” …he was pretty mad, but that was nothing compared to this.  I’m a little nervous about seeing Mia…if she knew Miranda all those years ago, maybe Miranda did something with her identity too?  It turns my stomach to think about, but I need to know….I’m tired of not knowing things.  

Ethan rubbed his eyes and stared at the journal entry.  The intense eyes of the Heisenberg twin, moved onto paper by way of his pencil, glared up at him, and he closed the leather-bound book.  With a sigh he stared out the window at the mostly grey sky; stars were out already, and clouds moved quickly underneath them.  Thunder had rumbled most of the afternoon, but no rain yet fell.  As Ethan watched, lightning flickered across the valley that once-was Heisenberg’s Factory, below the cliffs.  

Were they crazy to go down there?  They’d discussed where specifically to venture–Heisenberg’s idea was over the obliterated ceremony site.  Not only was it over the original location of Miranda’s lab, it was where the Mutamycete had lived before Chris’s explosives.  Since its regrowth, the central nervous system of the Mold was now away from that site.  But if any of the underground cavern systems remained–Heisenberg swore that he could sense them with his powers-then the Mold itself was powerful in that area.  Eva had agreed with this.  

It wasn’t a bad idea, but Ethan was even less enthused about going back there than he had been to go to Dimitrescu’s castle.  It was, in a sense, Ethan’s death place.  Well…one of them?  He wondered if Miranda would be able to manifest there in different ways, if the Mold would help her.  It seemed to in the past, even with Eva and Rose working against her.  

The office door opened and Eva entered, looking particularly solemn.  Ethan turned his gaze from the brewing storm, and managed a faint smile for his friend.  

“Rose having fun seeing her friends?” 

“She is,” Eva said with a grin, “But I believe Maricara is the most happy.  She says Rose will say her name soon.” 

“That’s a lot of syllables even for me,” Ethan protested, stretching at the desk.  As he moved to push the seat back, Eva stayed him with a hand, and then pulled a stool away from the wall, to sit next to him.  

“I need to tell you something.”  She had papers in her hand–Ada’s research, he could see. 

“Okay.”  Ethan raised an eyebrow.  “You’re sitting down.  That means…?”

“It means it is important,” Eva said with a heavy breath.  “Not bad.  Yes?  Just…important.” 

“Is it about Karl?  Is he okay?” 

“He is fine.  I think it is about all of us,” she said, tilting her head as if she were uncertain.  “He read this first, while Donna slept and he stayed to watch over her.  He wanted me to make you aware of it as soon as possible.” 

“Why couldn’t he?”

Eva scratched her hair awkwardly.  “I do not think he is in a mood to talk much.” 

“Fair enough.”  Ethan had worked for months to get the reclusive engineer to talk in the first place, and most of what Ethan knew about Heisenberg’s past came from accidentally stepping into the other man’s thoughts and mind.  And now Heisenberg was handing off important information through Eva.  The blond massaged his temple, wishing there was more that he could do, but he finally leaned back in the leather chair.  “All right, hit me.” 

Eva’s confused stare reminded him that she’d not been in a human world for many years.  

“I mean….show me what you’ve got.” 

The blond woman thumbed through papers, moving to a paragraph with sloppily made notations beside it, slashed in red pen.  Heisenberg. 

Ethan abruptly made a noise and held up his hand.  “Wait.  This isn’t…your….mother’s writing, is it?”

“No, it is from the biologists in Ada’s organization.  She translated it for added security.”  Eva tapped the paperwork. “They seem to be simply trying to understand the Mold, rather than using it for weapons.  Although the same cannot be said for other, adjacent organizations.” 

“Right.” 

She began to read aloud, impressively translating the German to English as she went.  

“...Questions arise then as to the sentience of the Mold itself.  If considering the widely accepted model of consciousness which suggests that sentience and awareness are broadly grounded in the biology of the cell, it becomes obvious that firstly, the Mold is keenly aware of its environment.  It is very much like other fungi when mapping: its mycelium expands, detects the physical structure of its surroundings and responds to the availability of food and the presence of other organisms. The overall pattern of branching is determined by the genetic code, but the exact positions of each branch are dictated by the character of the environment. 

For this reason, the shape of each colony is never reproduced. The individual fungus is unique, much like how no two humans are exactly alike.  As this organism’s basis for operation, its “fungal brain”, has obviously imitated the human brain network, this calls defensive and survival mechanistics into question.  

Pathogenic fungal mycelia such as this mold and many others respond to their environment when they invade a host. Species which target humans have been shown to modify their growth form to become more invasive as the infection develops. These responses are genetically programmed and not learned behaviors, but the mold is able to grasp things about its environment and show that it learns.  

This leads to our report result: 

We have concluded that this Mold affects its hosts emotionally. 

Nowhere is this more obvious and evident than in witnessing behavior of its hosts after infection.  Many subjects have been mapped and their behavior studied by psychologists with all results leading back to the concept that the Mold influences its hosts’ decisions for its own survival. (like any parasite)

See attached reports from psychiatrists for more information on data gathered and how it is quantified.  

In mammal studies, including infected wildlife but most notably, infected humans, the Mold implants a strong desire for family into the host’s mind.  This manifests differently for every person affected based on the host’s pre-existing experiences and beliefs about family, but it…” 

Eva’s lip was trembling and Ethan stared past her toward a far bookshelf, his own eyes glassed over, as her first tears began to fall.  Exhaling and steeling herself she continued reading, but her voice was very much affected.  

“It is clearly part of the organism’s learned mechanism for survival.  If a candidate has, as two examples: a pre-existing yearning for family or, no close family relationships, the Mold’s influence can cause behaviors that are erratic, toxic, or even self-harming.  The host is not experiencing mental illness, rather, they are responding to the signals from the parasite to get, and keep, a family close.  This usually leads to behavior patterns that do not match the host’s personality–interviewed infected persons have stated during these ‘crises’ they felt no control over themselves or their desires.  

For notes on extreme examples of this manifestation, see examples ‘Connections E Series’ and ‘Romania - Miranda.’ 

In other subjects, who did have positive family connections, the bond between those family members was strengthened universally.   The Mold rewards positive behaviors and emotions much like a human brain, and hosts report feeling satisfied when they are with their families or loved ones–even reporting feelings of bliss or euphoria when an entire family network is infected.  

In case studies where one member of the family was given a healing serum, removing the mold from their body temporarily, the other family members became combative and tried removing the patient from the room even though no danger to the host existed.  They become overprotective, anxious, and feel negative emotions for any threat and often manifest as overprotective family members.    

It is likely that hosts who manifest this type of protectiveness would have unmatched resilience when a family member is in danger.  We have documented animals with this protectiveness: an entire pack of infected wolves mourn the deaths of its elder members, showing symptoms of depression for months, and an infected murder of crows were witnessed having funeral ceremonies and mourning together after a death of one of their own.  Both communities of mammals had intense aggression when approached by outsiders.    

For notes on extreme examples of this manifestation, see example ‘Dulvey - Ethan Winters.’” 

The papers were thrown down onto Ethan’s desk, and Eva cautiously wiped her eyes, trying to judge the other blond’s reaction.  He was massaging the bridge between his eyes, his teeth bared as the information sank in.  Ethan’s hand dropped from his eyes down to his mouth and he stroked the dark stubble there. He stared at Eva, cupping his own chin. 

“So I’m not even me, really.  I just…” He shrugged, his voice hollow.  “I’m just…..a psycho dad because of the Mold.” 

“No,” Eva argued sternly.  Likely, she had been anticipating this response.  “You are still you.  The Mold affects everyone differently.  What it has done is amplify your pre-existing feelings about family.  It has propelled you when you needed it, to save your daughter.”  Eva’s fingers brushed his knee.  “Everything you have done is because you are noble, Ethan, and brave.  This doesn’t change that.” 

He frowned at the compliment.   “But this means that all of us…every single person…is doing whatever we can to what?  Seek family?  Be a part of a family?”

She was silent, biting her lip and then lifting a hand to her own chin as he’d done.  

“I suppose so, or at least, subconsciously, in ways.” 

“So…Miranda slaughtered a bunch of innocent people by turning this into a fucked up experiment for one person’s life…Eveline had Jack doing her dirty work of trying to create infected people to expand her own network….Mia, what?  What did it make her do?” 

“I don’t know Mia very well,” Eva admitted, “But from what I understand, she tried very hard to stay in her marriage with you, hiding things from you and trying desperately to make things appear stable and make you happy.  Could you see how that would benefit her, as a host, responding to these feelings, the need to…keep her family together?  On top of the love that she had for you?”

Ethan sighed, but he was still too in-shock to produce tears or outrage.  Instead he gripped the sides of the large leather armchair, and planted his feet on the ground.  

“I’m not even a person at all.  Nothing I do is even me.  Are any of my feelings real?”

“They are all real!  Ethan, you are not listening.” 

“Oh, I’m listening, I even made it as aggressive dad footnote in their article.”  When he threw his head back, closing his eyes, Ethan mused aloud, “Guess this explains the Lords.  Donna needed a million terrifying dolls to keep her company.  Moreau obsessed over Miranda.  And even Lady Dimitrescu and her monster daughters.  The Mold just wants us all to be one big happy family.” 

It had begun to rain.  What was usually a comforting sound now filled his heart with sorrow.   He remembered Godric’s words.  Sorrow will find you. 

He wasn’t trying to avoid it or anything, but damn it sure seemed to seek him out, didn’t it?  Eva looked heartbroken, and he met her eyes for the first time, happy to listen to her, instead of his own cynical thoughts.  

“I could almost forgive my mother, knowing that her grief was transformed into something that would benefit the entire organism.  Almost.  But what she has done is turn this survival mechanism, which could have been something so lovely, like the love you showed in protecting your daughter, into something horrific.”  

Hearing Eva speak so sadly about her own mother caused Ethan to put aside his feelings; he didn’t have feelings, actually–he was numb, from his head down to his feet, he could feel nothing.  It was the type of news that made one go blank, disconnected immediately, just like he’d done when Eveline first told him he was made out of mold. 

Even in a moment where his own distraught grief eluded him and he turned into a barely existing shell of a person, he had compassion.  Ethan stood and pulled Eva into a hug.  She soon burst into tears, sobbing onto his chest, and he hugged her harder, planting his chin onto the shorter blond’s head. From the hallway of the second floor, he could hear more sobs, likely Donna.  

The house would have made a good haunted attraction today, what with all the wailing.   And Karl’s loud Frankenstein-boot stomping.  Ethan smiled to himself, and then Eva ended up laughing through her sobs, choking as she fought to control the laugh.

“You weren’t supposed to hear that thought,” he said quietly, smiling against her cornsilk hair.  “Eva, it’s gonna be okay.” 

She laughed more, and then sighed as she pulled away, wiping tears again.  “Thank you, Ethan.” 

“Thank you for dropping the bomb, I guess.”  He sank back into his chair as she turned to leave.  “How did Karl feel about it?” 

Eva paused at the door, keeping it closed.  

“He didn’t say much, but I think he is happy to have some answers about the others in the village–their devotion to the religion.  Perhaps he also has answers about his own resistance to the pull of family.” 

“Yeah, why would he have that resistance?  What made him different?” 

Eva frowned, and finally turned back to Ethan.  “It is not my place to say more, but Heisenberg has always been protected.  By someone out of the reach of the Mold.  A true family member, which has…perhaps…overridden the commitment that Miranda put inside him when she infected him.  I think he has always believed his father and brother were also protected, immune.  Knowing that at least his brother is not, is devastating to him.”  

His mother.  

Ethan hadn’t said it aloud, but Eva nodded anyway.  

Ethan remembered the vision of Heisenberg’s, the pitiful and yet horrific creature strung up on pulleys-that looked dead but was not afforded that luxury.  That was the source of Heisenberg’s protection, his link to true family?  It was nightmarish.  How could Heisenberg have any solace at all?  Then again, maybe he didn’t.     

He chewed on his lip, and then waved at Eva.  “Get some sleep.” 

“Be careful tonight,” she warned.  “I know you don't need to hear it...and I already told Karl....Not all answers are comforting.”  

[therecordchanger62279]

THE LAST MAGAZINE SUBSCRIPTION

I used to get mail all the time. These days, though, it’s mostly junk mail, and fliers, and credit card offers. A couple of years ago, I attempted to remedy the situation by subscribing to some print magazines. I already had a subscription to Record Collector, a music monthly based in England. And I’d already subscribed to the new print edition of Creem magazine due in Autumn 2022. I liked the idea of some fresh reading material every month, and I wanted to break up my reading a bit.

I added a subscription to a magazine called The Strand, a mystery magazine published quarterly. I also ordered a one-year subscription to Goldmine, a record collector’s magazine. I’d been a Goldmine reader from the 1980s until 2007 when I let a longstanding subscription expire after the magazine underwent some drastic changes, and the quality declined. But, as I’d been away for 16 years, I thought the time might be right to try again, and see if the magazine had regained its footing. Along with Creem, and Record Collector, I’d have four magazine subscriptions to look forward to in my mail.

The first two issues of The Strand arrived on schedule by October. But the third issue never turned up at all. After waiting another month, I contacted them, and requested either a replacement for the missing third issue, or cancellation of my subscription. Two more weeks passed, and I heard nothing, so I contacted them again. They curtly replied that they’d delayed mailing the replacement due to a snowstorm. I live in the Midwest, and there were no snowstorms this winter that lasted two weeks. In any case, when the issue still did not arrive, I asked them to cancel my subscription, and refund the balance. Instead, they sent the December issue – now eight weeks late, and I never heard from them again. I never received the last issue on my subscription, nor did I receive a check for the missing issue. I won’t be subscribing to The Strand ever again.

The situation with Goldmine was more complicated. Three months went by after I bought the sub, and I’d gotten nothing in the mail. Then an e-mail arrived telling me that the next issue had been delayed because the magazine was switching from a bi-monthly to a quarterly. I’d paid $29.99 for six issues, and I was told that I would still receive six issues, but the issues would ship over eighteen months instead of twelve. By October, I’d received the first two. The third issue due in December never arrived. I requested either a replacement copy or a refund for the balance of my subscription. I got a notice shortly after that nothing was owed me. I fired off another e-mail, and demanded they honor the agreement, or refund the balance. I heard nothing back, but a few weeks later, a replacement issue arrived. I assumed we were back on track, but the Spring issue is out, and I never received it either, and there was no refund forthcoming. As happened with The Strand, I was cheated, and probably will never see another issue, let alone a refund. It’s just as well. I don’t like being cheated, but I’d already decided not to renew because, while the magazine has a glossier, nicer design than it had in 2007, the quality of the journalism is just as poor now as it was then. They don’t use many professional journalists, but depend, instead, on amateur “fanboys” to supply them with fawning profiles of washed-up dinosaur bands trading under famous names, but usually with no (or maybe only one) original member. These band’s careers careers were over in the 70s and 80s. But to read the profiles, you’d think they are still topping the charts, and as relevant as ever. No, thanks.

I was very excited to see a new version of Creem. It had been my favorite music magazine growing up, and I was especially excited about having access to the archive of back issues. The first year’s issues arrived as scheduled, and while I liked the magazine’s content for the most part, the design wasn’t what I would call reader-friendly. When I renewed, I decided to take just an online subscription which was easier to read, and considerably cheaper. A month later I got an e-mail telling me all subs would be print-only going forward with continued access to the archive, and that I would have to pony up the difference or lose the subscription altogether, and be refunded the amount. Because I was enjoying the archive so much, I agreed – even though I really didn’t like the print edition, and would’ve preferred to continue reading it online (which I could do while still being required to pay for a print copy I didn’t want).

I read issues five, and six online, and thought the magazine was improving with each issue. But I was really beginning to spend a lot of time reading the archive’s back issues. The magazine was every bit as good as I remembered, and I was reading back issues I’d missed as well. But in January, most of the archive suddenly disappeared. I reached out to find out what was going on, and was told the archive was migrating to a new online home, and would be back very soon just as it was. A month went by, and there was no progress. There were posts, and complaints to the magazine’s Facebook group, and I sent an e-mail telling them that if the archive wasn’t going to be available, that I couldn’t justify $85 a year for a print magazine I was forced to buy just to get access to an archive that was no longer there.

Then I received an e-mail from Creem’s CEO requesting a conference call with me, and the magazine’s marketing director. I was stunned, but was told they’d been impressed with my e-mails, and the feedback they’d been getting from me all along, and wanted to have a phone chat and clear some things up, answer some questions, and let me know the direction the magazine would be taking going forward.

We chatted for more than an hour, agreed to stay in touch, and I was satisfied because my concerns and questions had been addressed to my satisfaction. The archive was still in a state of disrepair four weeks later when the new issue appeared online. I read it, and while I enjoyed some of it very much, I was repelled by a good deal of it. I wrote an e-mail offering some constructive criticism, and was disappointed to hear that the things that I’d most disliked would be a part of the magazine’s direction moving forward. In the meantime, the archive finally reappeared in radically altered, and nearly unusable form. Again, I complained, and was told they were aware of the problem, and that it would be fixed soon. It wasn’t (and still isn’t). And, oh, by the way, the print copy I’d been forced to buy had never arrived in the mail either.

The condescending remarks I’d gotten from the marketing director about my criticisms of the new direction did not sit well with me at all, and after two more weeks of no repairs to the archive, and no print edition in my mailbox, I cancelled my subscription, and received a refund.

In the meantime, I’ve been reading the Trouser Press archive online for free, and very much enjoying the new Zip It Up! Book reproducing the best of that magazine’s work in celebration of its 50th anniversary (see an earlier post on this). The journalism is far, far better than anything on the market today. And it’s made me realize that even my Record Collector subscription is no longer necessary. Record Collector is an excellent magazine, but my collecting days are over thanks to the exorbitant cost of music these days. The profiles of artists they cover are the same ones I’ve been reading for the past 50 years. But they’re far more interesting to read when the profiles were done when the artists were young, and the music brand new. And that’s what I get from Trouser Press, and what I was getting from the Creem archive. There’s no revisionist history either. The record reviews are unnecessary because I’m no longer collecting, and if I want to hear something new, I can easily hear it on YouTube, or download it from the web. So, when my sub expires in a few months, I won’t be renewing, and for the first time in 50 years, I won’t have a single magazine subscription. I won’t be getting any mail either, but since our mail delivery is inconsistent, and our mail often goes missing, it’s just as well. There’s really nothing about the 21st century I like. The more time I can spend in the 20th, the happier I’ll be.

[trolleytracksmoved]

Something I'd love to see in like, a server or a fic or SOMETHING is just...

Let's take the whole concept of a "Toon Resistance" to its natural conclusion.

Like, the Cogs walking about the streets like they own the place, putting up Wanted Posters on the Neighborhood Streets and acting like they're in charge of the Toons and that the Toons are beholden to their laws.

Cogs trying to "Tax" Shopkeepers and taking over their shops when they can't or won't pay up.

Just... Something that shows the Cogs as a hostile and occupying force that shows ZERO respect for the Toons' actual government, while also explaining why it's called the Toon Resistance and not the "Toontown Self Defense Force".

Honestly! Like, it really doesn't take a lot to see that Cogs are corrupt with what we're given already, but I would love to see servers or just any writers in general do more with it than what TTO did, because TTO was as bare bones as it could get. Speaking of resistance, there's a piece of TTO lore you reminded me of that I like but think is underutilized and is kinda unknown because it was never brought up in the original game ever; you only knew it existed if you got trading cards in the mail. What that was is in the Jellybean trading card, Toons had a different currency than the ones in-game up due to a "Goof-ed up" delivery by Goofy causing a switch. As cute as the OG lore is, could you imagine if instead of the currency change being a slip-up, the Toon's intentionally changed their it as a way of protest and telling the Cogs to lay off? I dunno if that counts as resistance per say but I do think it'd be a pretty interesting move on the Toons part in response to the Cog's invasion, especially considering the change is on-par with the Toons' wacky lifestyle and the Cog's can't stand that about them.

ANYWAY, I believe Toontown servers has the pieces needed, but when it comes to putting it all together is where it starts to fall a bit on the wayside and leaves more to be desired, but at the same time I think it's an easy thing to fix? For instance, Toons already get kidnapped by the VP right.. it wouldn't be hard to implement Wanted or Missing posters for them scattered throughout the streets like you said, and there can be a plotline about how ever since Cogs invaded Toons have been going missing. By doing so, it incites urgency and serves as a way of saying, "hey the cogs are such a big threat they're not only taking over buildings but also kidnapping random townsfolk and sometimes even important figures like our mayor this is messed up! we need to do something about it!". Additionally, while I'm still kinda,, puzzled on how OG Lawbot works in-game and why Bumpy has been on trial for 10+ years, it's still something that's do-able I think. What if the Brrrgh / Lawbot Suit taskline was about Cogs forcing their own Rules on Toons and wrongfully incarcerating them as a show of power, and we had to fight to break them out since their system and way about everything was unfair in the first place? Idk. Ik it's only a couple of examples listed but there's stuff you can expand on!

[duckprintspress]

Duck Prints Press Summer 2023 Con Wrap!

We’ve now vended at our first two cons, and we wanted to take a few minutes to blog about it!

I (press owner Claire Houck/unforth) attended Fandom Fest in Schenectady, NY, and Albacon in Clifton Park, NY, and vended on behalf of the Press. Authors Nova Mason, Shea Sullivan, Catherine E. Green, and Tris Lawrence helped me out with manning the booth, handling transactions, participating in our first DPP panel, and more, so huge THANKS to them. (Also to Prof. Robert Heverly from Albany Law School, for contributing his expertise on copyright law to our Fandom Fest panel). I wrote about our Fandom Fest panel here, and about our events at Albacon here and here.

To be honest, we really had no idea how things would go, and I’m not exaggerating when I say that we far exceeded our expectations. Going into this, I’ll own I was very afraid – would people be interested in our Press? Would we make money? Or would we be that sad, lonely table that everyone walks quickly by? But things couldn’t have gone better – they went so well we’re already looking at more events to attend in the future.

From a fiscal standpoint, we made almost double what I anticipated and completely made up the expense of buying the supplies and equipment necessary for us to vend at these events and going forward. From a panel perspective, our events were nicely attended. From a “growing the business” standpoint, we added many names to our mailing lists and gained social media platforms. And, from a networking standpoint, we had a fantastic time and met a lot of awesome people – and that’s primarily what this post is about!

You already know about us; we’re here to shout-out some other folks we’re now very happy to know!

Top Row, Left Picture: The amazing Syrren (@syrren) and I bonded instantly over our shared love of the men of Mo Xiang Tong Xiu books and Stardew Valley romance options. I miiiight have ended up with some merch (though the Genshin Impact ones are gifts for a friend).

Top Row, Middle Picture: jiadoesart had many lovely things, and I picked out some stickers for my Ghibli-loving kids.

Top Row, Right Picture: The Consol Collection, sadly, has no website that I can find, but they had a lot of things such as this adorable Totoro sticker I got for my kids. And when the owner of Eclectic Arts approached me in an absolutely fabulous Hawaiian shirt featuring Pride-flag-colored twenty-sided dice, I instantly agreed to a sticker trade.

Bottom Row, Left Picture: According to the Fandom Fest organizers, it was 100% a coincidence that we ended up next to Duck and Cover, but we couldn’t have had a cooler or more appropriate neighbor. A con attendee felt it was so on-brand for Duck Prints Press that they actually bought us this one-of-a-kind hand-painted James Bond duckie! We also talked with Duck and Cover about maybe offering some of their custom ducks as campaign add-ons in the future, so be on the lookout…

Bottom Row, Right Picture: The owner of The Cogitation Zone, Lisa, is a long-time friend of Tris Lawrence, who commissioned us this custom Duck Prints Press business card holder that’ll be accompanying us to all our future cons! Lisa also had made a large number of adorable creatures, and I miiiight have traded a copy of one of our anthologies for an axolotl. Because. Axolotl.

Some Other Neat Folks We Met:

Pastel Prince Shop: lots of gorgeous queer art and merch; I’m hoping to get one of their asexual pride bracelets in the future (it got sold before I could grab it, sadly).

Bear and Bird Boutique: a local business that was vending at Fandom Fest, too, they have a lot of amazing bits and baubles, both fandom-related and original. We’ve bought everything from the Hilda graphic novel to a dragon puzzle at their store.

Picnocline: the only reason I didn’t buy things from Picnocline’s shop is that there were so many cute things that I literally couldn’t pick.

It’s Getting Dicey: dice, one of my true weaknesses! They have metal pride-flag dice sets, and lots of queer dice trays. I wish I could get them all…

Two-Penny Nerdlesque: a local burlesque troupe; they were very enthusiastic about And Seek (Not) to Alter Me and our queerifying of Much Ado About Nothing, and delighted told me about their own very queer versions of Shakespeare and other plays – I’m definitely going to have to check them out in the future.

(There are others too, but I didn’t grab everyone’s information, and I think this is plenty for one post. 😀 )

If any of you all are seeing this post, it was an absolute delight to meet you, and please don’t be a stranger!

Going forward, we’re looking forward to participating in more events and making more connections with other creators, especially other queer creators! Just today, we’ve applied to vend at A Big Gay Market, taking place in Washington Park in Albany on October 29th, 2023. We’ve also got a tentative schedule for 2024, and we’ll post more about where you’ll be able to find us as the dates grow closer and we find out if the juried shows have accepted our applications. We’re going to do our best to continue the success we’ve enjoyed at our first two conventions by pursuing vending as a way to meet potential readers and customers, grow relationships with other queer creators, and get the Duck Prints Press names out there for the benefit of all the authors, artists, and others we work with!

Got a con in New York State or Massachusetts that you love and think we should try to attend in 2024? Let us know in the comments or by dropping us an e-mail at info at duckprintspress dot com!

[loopy777]

So something i wanted to ask your opinion on.

In regards to rings of power, if i had been told to write the story, and i had been told i could only use what was in the apendixes, here's how i would have done it.

Season 1. - Exploration.

We are introduced to the Numenorians from the opposite point of view. Their landings at Middle Earth as they begin exploring the world.

Speciffically i would have used the Haradrim for this to lay the groundworks for the way these two people would become so bitter foes.

Start off with the Numenoreans beginning as traders and explorers, make friendly firdt contact, impress the locals with tech and stupidly good and impressive maps, not to mention their insane height.

The numemorean captain makes friends with the local chief, with one of his sons deciding to ask to get to join the crew on their voyage back as an envoy to establish trade relations(in reality the lad just wants to explore more of this new, interesting people, with him having been shown before this as a curious fellow) between their people.

The numenoreans of the time is far less xenophobic than they will eventually become, so he says yes, and what follows is basically a classic tolkien adventure, with the crew visiting the coasts of Middle earth, to trade with the already established trading posts before heading back home.

Have a balance between the whimsical and the serious, but as they travel further north, they also hear news of this(in the numenoreans view) upstart barbarian king called sauron.

Dont actually do anything with him in season 1. Just make sure to establish he's a prescence, and the numenoreans arent taking him all that seriously, but the people he rules(the people of mordor and later gondor) takes him very seriously, and treats him like a big, big deal.

Instead the focus is on both character and world building. We get to explore both the Haradrim perspective of the world, a proud people with their own traditions who's entire worldview is challenged by the Numenoreans.

The main cast is explored, and unlike rings of power are completely original, so no shoehorning in of historical figures who shouldnt be there, with the first season ending on our haradrim traveler having an audience with the king at the time being the very first time we meet some historical bigshot.

And the reveal and exploration of Numenor should be something absolutely breathtaking.

Have our haradrim travler constantly be amazed at the outside world, while the numenoreans take it in stride, with him baffled by how they can see such amazing wonders(to give one example i would have used the dwarfs who presumably lived in the yellow mountains remnant in northern africa, to explore dwarf culture from a different perspective than the moria and successor one, by having it be built into a mountain, but be a port city with a spectacular, titanic harbor), and all they say is "its good, but it's not numenor".

Have numor be built up as this land unlike anything else... And then at the end of the season, actually deliver on it.

As the ship pass the mists, and our crew begins to see something, which at first looks like this towering mountain spire as tall as Minas tirith's white one will one day be... And instead as the mists pass, we, and the haradrim realise that it's just a lighthouse/watchtower in the sea.

The port is beyond it.

Basically what im thinking is, the mythical valhalla(NOT the marvel version) in marble. Numenors cities are these magaopolis unlike anything else ever seen in lord of the rings. The greatest empire of man, who builds their megacities on the scale of modern cities, only these are actually beautiful marvels of stone, rather than the ugly ass mess of steel and various other things we are cursed with.

Meanwhile the people dress in armor clearly from an earlier period of history(i would have prefered if the entire universe was stuck at mail armor, but this is a prequel to the movies so thats a no go unfortunately, so i would go with hoplite armor with helmets liek the gondor from the movies) but other than that, you see nothing to suggest these are in any way a people poorer than later gondorians, quite on the contrary.

Im imagening something like how marco polo was astonished that even chinese peasents wore silk, only maybe on a much grander scale, maybe have gold and silver be so plentiful that pretty much everyone have jewelry and fine clothing you'd expect belonged to royalty.

And finally there is the king. Have him built up as this larger than life character who everyone treats with a level of deference that astonishes our haradrim visitor, and suggests to us he's this absolute monarch figure... Which he absolutely is, but he's also a very friendly guy, who is delighted to meet a new visitor from an hiertho unknown people, and takes him with him to chow him the greatest treasure of Numor. Their great great tree, from which the gondor descendant was a faltered successor to.

The climax(or rather the ending) of season 1. Has the king deciding on where he will send his next expedition, and he basically have 2 options. 1. Back north into the lands of Middle earth, or 2. Further down, to round the cape of proto africa and continue to explore the world eastwards.

Now we, the watcher knows that Numenor really needs to do something about Sauron, but the king dismisses him and his "paltry" realm, instead deciding there is maybe better opportunity to be found eastwards, so we set up season 2. With the promise of future adventures with the cast that the audience has now hopefully come to love, but also a cut away one of the cities the crew visited on the way, where the city welcomes in absolute fear their lord, the upstart by the name of sauron.

And we get our glimpse into him just by taking a look at his baggage train, with orc battallions wearing his symbol on their coats, Human soldiers by the tens of thousands, and a host of obviously recently captured slaves that must surely number somewhere near a hundred thousands, all in slaves.

Which sauron casually explains to the prince with "the eastern campaign went well." So we don't have to go into detail about it, while also shoeing that sauron is a really, really bad guy.

Anyway, what do you think so far? Does this sound like a way better take on the period, while still respecting Tolkien's world? Anything you feel needs to be changed?

If you liked it, i can continue with my drafts for season 2. If not, i shant bore you further.

I think there's some solid potential here, but of course in a fanfic exercise like this, there's no pressure from studio heads to deliver Mystery Boxes and plotty narratives in the modern storytelling style; you can truly go with a Tolkien-esque style of storytelling that's more episodic and low-stakes (at least on a micro-level). (And as I said in my previous response about the appeal of 'The Mandalorian,' that might be what people enjoy more.) In the real world, Sauron would be forced to have a more direct presence, although you might be able to get away with a miniboss who can be killed at the season. And I'm not sure how accommodating the budget could be for a world-tour where every place has to look different.

(This might be a good time to admit I haven't watched 'Rings of Power' and don't feel the need to, so I don't know how much it really looks like the most expensive television ever made. My impression is that there several parallel storylines, each with their own cast, that largely take place in static locations or generic wilderness/woods.)

But I really like the idea of making our POV character a young Haradrim who gets to explore the world for the first time and introduce us to the critical Middle-Earth Backstory elements. That alone is a pretty good hook for people in the know, with how those nations eventually come under the domination of Sauron, so we have this tragic future looming over any optimism, but perhaps some hope for individual characters. And the promise of finally doing something with the Blue Wizards could be a nice hook, as well. Likewise, seeing different Dwarf culture would be fun.

The freedom for a set of OCs who are exploring the world is very functional, and allows room to play up whatever characters appeal to the audience the most. The story of Numenor always seemed something very GoT-esque, where powerful lords of houses vie to control the fate of their culture, so putting us in the shoes of some working stiffs is a nicely counter-intuitive touch. I do worry that some of our traveling party risk getting left behind as the story progresses and the stakes get higher, but careful writing can handle that expansion (basically the opposite of what Legend of Korra did).

I also like what you capture about Numenor, and I hope the Art Direction can live up to it. I think it needs a little acidic flavoring, though, in the form of our Haradrim Hero's reaction. He can be awed and appreciative and yadda yadda, but I'd like to see something in there that also highlights the Pride on display in this pinnacle of architecture, foreshadowing how the culture itself will eventually fall apart, in addition to the King's arrogance about Sauron.

I also enjoy the idea of Sauron's introduction and revisiting one of the locations from the earlier in the season, a nice little use of existing emotional investment. I'm into his introduction being to his procession as a form of characterization, the ugliness of his doings comparing to what will the beauty of his physical form, although I can't help but wonder about the specific framing of his first on-screen appearance. Filthy slaves carrying his throne while he wears glowing white robes? Perhaps too heavy-handed, but something with that dynamic. Ideally, we could see a glimpse of what was said about his early days on Middle-Earth, wanting to rebuild what he had helped to destroy, but of course his corruption is very much set in at this point.

So, all in all, it sounds better in that I'd be interested in watching, unlike RoP. The mystery boxing very much worked against that one, as it sold itself entirely More Tolkien Stuff and did nothing to try to hook my interest as a story. Your idea sounds like a solid framework with room to grow.

Just watch out once you turn it over to the Writers Room and the Art Department. This thing is going to live or day based on how much we enjoy spending time with the main cast in fun fantasy places.

[showerbong]

To:

The Cut c /o Lifestyle and True Crime Editorial Teams Vox Media New York, NY

12/31/202X

To whom it may concern, I, Isabelle F. Mcdowell, in sound (in fact, remarkably sound) mind and body, on the above written day, am currently in a state of pursual by agents of the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation, Federal Trade Administration, Central Intelligence Agency, National Security Agency, Homeland Security Department, Food and Drug Administration, and the Department of Agriculture, among (no doubt) others. While I am resolute in my claim of innocence of any wrongdoing in the matters at hand, which I will soon unpack for you in detail, I fear the worst as flagrant attempts upon my life as an American citizen have already been made. Simply put--a significant advancement in my work (while undeniably beneficial for all man(and woman)kind) has brought the wrath of the avaricious, debased, hubristic, bureaucracy writ-large down upon my youthful head.

In the event of my untimely demise, I have instructed my landlady Agatha Smithers to mail this letter in the hopes that I may be ultimately exonerated and revered for my scientific contributions. I have instructed Agatha to diligently await a message from me (in the form of an index card slipped under the door of her ground-floor apartment) every day at 3:30 pm -- if you are reading this, I can only assume that my daily proof-of-life cards have ceased sliding under Agatha's door, and that she has dutifully mailed this letter and begun her process of mourning my death. I hope that my attempts to abscond to one of the sea regions (caribbean, adriatic, or potentially even the baltic) will have been successful, but i fear the odds are not in my favor.

The following is a transcript of my experiences throughout the early weeks of December of this year. This document was originally intended to serve as a newsletter update to my Substack subscribers (@ IzzyMD), but I have been blocked from my account and am thus attempting to re-home the piece. I have left this document in its original formatting to preserve its authenticity.

My cursory explanation of recent events in this letter belies the breadth and depth of the artifact below. I hope that can hold any suspended disbelief until you have finished reading this document in full-- thank you for your attention, and I wish you vitality of body and adolescence of spirit for a long, long, time to come.

Sincerely, Isabelle F. Mcdowell Freelance Dietitian, Lifestyle Blogger, and Independent Researcher Enemy of the U.S. Government, FBI's Most Wanted

#

recently, i have found an unparalleled formula on my journey of reverse aging-- a solution of grapefruit juice, white wine vinegar, beet puree, baking powder, pulp from 2 blood oranges, tapioca flour, and head & shoulders dandruff shampoo, applied on my kneecaps on a strict schedule of 7 times per day. don't ask me how it works-- i don't know, nor, frankly, do i care to. it came to me in a dream of sorts, last week during one of my routine adderall binges. in between, i think, the time i took my second extended release of the evening and before i snorted a little pile of instant off of a butter knife on my couch.

it wasn't a 'voice' which relayed the reverse aging recipe to me-- no, no auditory hallucinations or anything. I was tweaking, naturally, but this state of inebriation was not unhabitual for me, and consequently was not likely cause for hallucination. i had turned on the TV but not bothered to pick something to watch before the stimulants hit, so it was stuck on the samsung tv channel looping old episodes of Medium. i was vaguely aware of patricia arquette's soft, whispery sort of meandering lines of dialogue-- particularly when she's having premonitions and communing with sprits, ghosts, specters, etc.-- droning on in the background. I was sitting there on my phone, obsessively blurring all of the wrinkles out of my forehead in a long slew of equivocally soft-core pornographic photos i had just taken, when i was felt some inexplicable compulsion within me to get up, mix those specific ingredients in a cloudy tupperware container, and apply it, wrapping a roll of saran wrap a couple times around my knees.

of course, i don't expect anyone to believe me without proof. but i'm sharing the entire, intimate details of this discovery so as to make it not only available but accessible to all who who seek to reignite that feeling, that aliveness of youth. plus, most have these ingredients laying around in the pantry; even if one does not have a bottle of head & shoulders on hand, perhaps because one has the luxury of not suffering debilitating dandruff like i do (an unnamed friend recently (and graciously) dusted some 'parmesan cheese' out of my bangs as we were leaving the italian restaurant), head and shoulders is pretty cheap. all said and done, this masque can be whipped up at home for approximately $16 and likely comes out to around $2.75 per application, depending on how bulky your kneecaps are. but i digress.

while i was unsure if the salve would show immediate results, i kept fastidious documentation of my spiritual, hormonal, cardiovascular, digestive, emotional, interpersonal, social (broadly defined), musculoskeletal, pheromonal, etc. status-- all with the betterment of humanity in mind. below is an excerpt from my field notes, detailing my experience as it happened. While some quantitative information is included here, the below excerpts are mostly qualitative in nature-- entries were completed daily, and were my attempts to track progress, highlight particular observations, distill key findings, contextualize these insights in narrative form. Complete numeric documentation of quantitative data (including measurements taken and metrics developed during this time) is appended in Chart A.

I have avoided any omissions or editorializations in these entries in the hopes that thorough journalistic best-practices will guide you to your own conclusions; despite this, i must say that i believe the evidence speaks for itself.

anyway, here are my accounts of what happened to me in the past week:

#

FIELD NOTES- I. Mcdowell

Tuesday, 12/4 (12 hours post-application)

8:34 AM- Morning forehead wrinkles measured .7 millimeters depth on average (baseline: .9mm, 4 axial wrinkles recorded), capillary refill time of undereye bags were oculus dexter: 00:00.6 (baseline: 00:00.7) and oculus sinister: 00:00.9 (baseline: 00.01). Left eye still giving me trouble, but I feel rather fresh today

9:23 AM- Gay barista at Starbucks, who is always at the register when I come in, does not sigh heavily as he plugs my order into the computer today, thanks me, and also asks if i would like my receipt. this is unusual for him (baseline: two sighs, no actual words). On my way out, I hold the door open for an elderly woman, who miraculously smiles at me. (baseline: an old woman in a walker a couple weeks back yelled 'go kill yourself you stupid bitch' at me as i walked by on Commonwealth Ave).

[lovedtogo]

This absolutely gorgeous navy suede Saint Laurent Toy Lou Lou sold before it hit the grid. I think this has to be the prettiest one I’ve seen so I couldn’t resist sharing a photo even though it’s already gone. The website is always the most up to date place to find out current stock. Our January sale is now on! But we have new stock arriving at the end of this week, so keep an eye on the sneak peeks. Or sign up to our Mail list to be in the know for all new collection drops. 𝘄𝘄𝘄.𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗱𝘁𝗼𝗴𝗼.𝗰𝗼𝗺 @𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗱𝘁𝗼𝗴𝗼 (𝗶𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮 / 𝗙𝗮𝗰𝗲𝗯𝗼𝗼𝗸) Loved To Go Ltd (inc. trade names Loved to Go and Loved To Go Kids) is not affiliated, associated, or officially connected with the brands of the preowned items mentioned and sold in this website. Trademarks and copyrights are reserved to the original brands. All photos are our own. Please do not use without prior permission and please tag @lovedtogo if sharing via stories. Thank you. #lovedtogosold #lovedtogosaintlaurent #saintlaurenttoyloulou #toylouloubag #toylouloy #ysltoyloulou #saintlaurentpreloved #saintlaurentaddicted #saintlaurentaddict (at Brentwood, Essex) https://www.instagram.com/p/CnNLfB9re1E/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[androxys]

I posted 782 times in 2022

That's 782 more posts than 2021!

159 posts created (20%)

623 posts reblogged (80%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sohotthateveryonedied

@bitimdrake

@amazinggrayson

@thebatfamhasruinedmylife

I tagged 779 of my posts in 2022

#reblog - 575 posts

#dc comics - 466 posts

#chit chat - 199 posts

#tim drake - 151 posts

#batman - 106 posts

#moving blogs - 106 posts

#dick grayson - 96 posts

#star wars - 73 posts

#stephanie brown - 44 posts

#ao3 - 39 posts

Longest Tag: 92 characters

#or that it’s some psychological symbol that it appears in tim’s narrative but not in bruce’s

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I am being SO normal about the Sandman trailer and release date :)))

71 notes - Posted June 6, 2022

#4

I think if I could somehow mail a single TPB to every Batman fan on the planet for them to really read it would be the Death in the Family/Lonely Place of Dying trade paperback collection.

Like, I’m not saying that these stories are The Best Batman Stories Ever Told, or even that they’re particularly good. (I personally think LPoD is a great story, but that’s neither here nor there.) I do think, however, that these two stories are foundational to SO much of the modern Batman mythos as we know it (or interpret it, as it may be) and people are at a disservice by not understanding

a) That Bruce loved Jason and that Jason’s death was an unquestionable, morally indefensible tragedy

b) That Bruce went Totally Bonkers immediately afterwards, to the point of Superman having to get involved

b.2) That Batman and Superman are more than just co-workers, and that they’re actually friends

b.3) That Superman and Batman still have to exist within larger systems (though this point and everyone’s personal take on the whole U.N. situation varies, because sometimes comics sure make bad choices)

c) That Bruce was devastated by Jason’s death, and went into a death spiral of his own

d) That his friends--namely Alfred--did in fact see this happening and were summarily rejected by Gruff Bruce

d.2) I wish that, in this fantasy world, I could also mail The Caped Crusader Vol. 1 so that people could contextualize what Bruce was like immediately before and immediately after Jason’s death, and how people like Gordon reacted to this obvious and immediate change.

e) That people could see the actual origin of Tim Drake. Like, really, what he actually did rather than all the misconstruction and fanon telephone that is natural, but not entirely correct. This would then hopefully have the consequence of informing everyone’s understanding of Tim’s place as Robin--yes he’s a little crazy. A little intense. A little over-eager and afraid at the same time. But very importantly a character defined by connective tissue.

f) That Dick and Alfred have very interesting roles in those two stories. I mentioned Alfred already in DotF, but in LPoD those two are also cruising on the crazy train (both the normal vigilante one and the dead-Jason express) and picking up speed.

f.2) There’s a lot of Dick character work that happens here in short order--his circus roots, his relationship with the Titans, and then the beginning of his relationship with Tim as brothers. But it also establishes the way that Dick cannot become Robin again, that he can’t regress--Nightwing is who he’s supposed to be. Not being Nightwing, the identity he created for himself, is a disservice. This will color his time at Batman, and dovetails neatly into his held truth that he cannot save Bruce from Bruce.

f.3) Alfred is an interesting case study here in how quickly he jumps onboard with Tim, considering how opposed he is to Bruce’s self destruction in the endless war on crime... unless he views Tim and the dangers of Robin as an appropriate stopgap to hold Bruce from absolute destruction. That sure is a lot of burden to be put on one teen, however, so there’s another interesting wrinkle.

g) That this trauma never goes away. Even once Jason comes back in Under the Red Hood, the pain of losing him is still something that all of the aforementioned people still deal with because the death of a child is something you never fully get over. And it’s not like Batman didn’t try to do anything--he was fully ready to kill Joker. He was ready in the U.N. building and then left him for dead on a crashing helicopter. That’s part of what makes Jason’s return in UTRH so tragic, but the potency of that tragedy (you didn’t avenge me, Bruce) is amplified.

Anyway, this got to be much longer and much closer to a rant than I anticipated, but this thought has been rattling around in my head since I saw one too many things that made me think “this person has not actually read A Death in the Family,” so this is my soapbox.

104 notes - Posted August 23, 2022

#3

Forget being normal about your partner, I want whatever River “if I have to harm you I will suffer more than every other living being in the universe so instead I will destroy reality” Song has going on

149 notes - Posted September 11, 2022

#2

I don’t have many headcanons, but I do think that Alfred smoked when he was in the military. He quit when he went to work for the Waynes for a variety of reasons, namely the danger of second hand smoke to a small child and the hypocrisy of smoking while being employed by a doctor. Years later, he swore he was having his final cigarette outside the police station while an eight year old Bruce gave the detective his statement. He broke that promise when he chainsmoked an entire pack waiting for Bruce to fly Jason’s body back from Ethiopia.

378 notes - Posted August 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

So I just got the notification about Spotify now having audiobooks, and not to have a knee jerk reaction and shoot from the hip, but don’t give Spotify your money. Download Libby and use it if you have a library card. If you don’t have a library card, as a librarian I feel inclined to tell you to go to your local library and get one! They are almost always the low price of free. Libby is also the low price of free. Don’t keep throwing money in the Spotify pit.

If you’re a person aged 13-21, I also just want to plug the Brooklyn Library’s Books Unbanned project where you can get a free eCard, because it’s such a cool program. Anyway. I’ve typed all this in like five minutes and am going to get a snack. Don’t keep giving Spotify your money when you can support your local institutions who will get you this stuff for free

812 notes - Posted September 20, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[wastelesscrafts]

Just wanted to say thank you for working so hard on this blog and making it as accessible as possible. I've felt really guilty about about the talk of clothing consumption, especially since I'm not confident in my sewing skills to make my own clothes for the most part, so seeing solutions to promote longevity and reuse for things you already at all different skill levels really inspired me! Thank you for not being judgmental and instead super helpful with this blog

Fashion, guilt, anger, and love

Thank you for your kind message! It's important to me that this blog is accessible regardless of skill level, so I'm glad to hear you feel that way.

I was originally planning on keeping this reply short, but I then realised there were a few more things I wanted to say about the topics you touched on, so I apologise for the wall of text.

Guilt:

You mentioned feeling guilty.

You can't choose what emotions you feel or what thoughts pop into your mind when those emotions crop up. That's a fact. What you can do is choose how to act on them.

A lot of us feel overwhelmed when hearing about the effects of the clothing industry on both our planet and the workers who make our clothes. Guilt is a common feeling to go along with this. After all, we wear those clothes! Doesn't that make us the cause of all this suffering? We have to take action!

Sounds familiar, right?

The thing is: guilt can be a tricky starting point for action. It's easy to get burned out if your motivation is feeling guilty over the system you live in. I would suggest focusing on two other emotions that this overwhelm often evokes, instead: anger and love.

Anger:

It's not your fault you're stuck in a broken system. You couldn't have done better in the past if you didn't know what was going on. You didn't personally invent this system, either. You're probably stuck in a situation right now where you know the impact of the goods you consume, but you can't just quit (and there's plenty of valid reasons why that might be so).

Doesn't that piss you off?

We often portray anger as a negative emotion: it can have dire consequences when it's aimed at the wrong people. But as any fellow Discworld fan will know, anger can also be a power for good.

Don't get angry at yourself for the stuff you bought in the past. Don't chastise that one friend who threw away a shirt because they didn't know how to sew on a button. Get angry at the industry!

Does fast fashion deserve to decide what clothes you get to wear, or what sizes are socially acceptable for your body to be? Is it okay for them to normalise selling shoddy clothes that were made in unethical circumstances and only last a few washes? I don't think so.

Let that anger motivate you to regain agency over your wardrobe. The industry doesn't get to decide what you wear, you do! Ignore the trends they try to push. Learn how to make, mend, and customise your own clothes. Buy second-hand, trade clothes with friends, start give-away groups and repair cafés,...

They also don't get to set norms like "single-use fashion is fine" or "abusing textile workers is a normal way to make clothes". Tweet at unethical companies, mail them, write articles about them, spread the word about their practices, support initiatives like the Pay Up movement, contact local policy makers,...

Use your anger in constructive ways to work against the injustices that made you feel angry in the first place. Punch up, never down.

Love:

You know what emotion lies at the source of all that anger and guilt? Not to sound like a stereotype, but it's love. You love your fellow humans, your planet, and the clothes you wear.

This system we live in is not normal. Humans are social creatures, even if we don't always feel like it. Our brains thrive on kindness, on making others happy, and on taking care of each other. We can't stand the knowledge that someone else is suffering: the drive to help others is literally a survival mechanism for our species.

The type of society many of us live in is pushing us in the opposite direction, so we have to push back and be kind to others and to ourselves. Being aware of this is an important part of fighting climate change, too.

I highly recommend the book "Humankind" by Rutger Bregman if you'd like to dive deeper into this topic (or his lectures on YouTube).

All in moderation:

Did this reply make you want to take action? Good!

Does this mean I want you to give it your all? No! Remember what I said about kindness? That goes for you, too.

Guilt can sometimes push us beyond our limits which will burn us out eventually. Be kind to yourself, stick to your boundaries, and take baby steps. Figure out what you can and can't do, be realistic, and make habits stick before you start a new one.

Would it be cool to become zero waste overnight? Sure, but it's not very realistic. But you know what else is a great first step? Helping that one hypothetical friend to fix the button that fell of their shirt so they don't have to go out and buy a new one.

To quote one of my favourite fashion podcasts: strive for progress, not perfection.

[snifflesthemouse]

Hello, to all you beautiful people! I sincerely hope this post finds you all happy, healthy, and blessed! I’ve got a little bit of time while riding in the car, so I decided to write this post.

I’ve mentioned before that I have my own theories, more so opinions, regarding the Duchess of Sussex and her father, Thomas Markle, Sr. (TM). While many empathize with TM, I’ve found myself questioning whether I’m in that category.

On the one hand, I do empathize with TM. When I look at TM, I see a parent who’s broken and misunderstood. A parent, whose only crime was loving their child too much. A parent, who’s not only getting up in age but also in a state of declining health. A person filled with regrets of what could’ve been, living with the constant fear the end will come sooner than any type of reconciliation will. I see my mother.

On the other hand, when I look at TM, I see someone completely different. I see a jack of all trades who knows how to make something special out of nothing special at all. I see a parent who taught their child all of their tricks, both directly and indirectly. A parent who gave all they could to their child, hoping to give them a life better than the life they were given. A parent who knew, that by investing in their child, they would later reap a bountiful yield from said investments. A person who knows how to charm and manipulate people into qui bono transactions, regardless of family or friendship. Someone who knows how to survive despite circumstances, even if that means burning the people that helped you up. I see my mother.

And while seeing my deceased mother’s characteristics in TM absolutely influences my stance regarding MM and TM, it is not the main reasons behind my suspicion of their relationship. No, those reasons come directly from the horses' mouths.

The truth is, I believe that MM and TM are not only cut from the same cloth, but they are also covertly operating in tandem with one another. Some areas of my belief need reconciled, and my thoughts on this are only opinions. But, when I consider what I know from what they’ve both said, and I consider that all with my own life experiences, it makes more sense that they’re working together. And that is why I struggle to truly empathize with TM. Let me explain.

First off, it’s important for you to keep in mind, that right around the same time MM was fostering her relationship with Prince Harry, MM had already employed PR tactics to “clean up her image". Remember that; remember there were professional image consultants being paid to manage MM's press coverage leading up to her wedding.

Also remember that, up until the Daily Mail busted TM out for staging the paparazzi shots, MM's official stance regarding TM as a father was overwhelmingly positive. Her Tig blog reinforces that MM not only loved her father, but she also credited him for many of her catchphrase concepts.

The Tig was MM's first real shot at establishing herself as a brand. The Tig was her baby, her brainchild backup plan for when her Suits career ended. In that space, she took every opportunity appropriate to praise her father. After all, he was the man behind “create your own box" and “bring your own table". He was the force behind “a face without freckles is like a night without stars.” Remember?

It speaks volumes that MM sang the praises of her wise and wonderful, yet tastefully progressive, father on The Tig. It says that Meghan originally planned for her father to be part of her “Meghan Markle of The Tig" brand and image. When you also consider that nobody from the PR teams did anything to cultivate or protect that image of a doting dad, it suggests MM decided her father needed a minimal role in her new era as “Meghan, The Duchess”.

Then came the paparazzi photos and the Daily Mail article busting old pops out. Whether MM had a hand in turning on the Photog to Samantha and TM, or whether TM got tired of not getting the right image in the press and acted independently, I am unsure. But, the letters between them make me think that this is all a ruse.

We all know that the People Magazine article was really a push from MM to TM to release the letter she so meticulously prepared. I mean come on now. We’ve all seen the released court documents by now. The emails between Jason Knauf and MM reveal just how meticulous MM was with writing a letter that otherwise should’ve been a personal correspondence never seen by public eyes. The level of energy and planning put into that letter tells me that it was always meant to be public. But why?

Many say it’s MM's way of justifying her ghosting behavior. MM says (in her emails to Knauf) that the letter was her way of making it look like she tried to stop her father’s “attacks on the Royal Family”. She said she couldn’t stand to see the pain her father was causing “H". That letter was her way of taking the pressure from “his family” off of her beloved. For me, though, I see a strategic move in a long con.

Let me break it down, step by step, to explain why I see a long con.

First, MM praises TM on The Tig. She sets him up as a vital contributor to who she is as a woman. Then, the DM dropped the news of the paparazzi setup involving TM. We hear conflicting info regarding communications between TM and MM and PH. But that’s not as important. What matters is TM was “cut off" from his daughter after his heart attack right before the wedding.

Now, if I’m MM, and I know that I’m not really feeling the BRF life, I’m going to be doing anything I can to cement my status and wealth. Especially the wealth. And we know that’s what she did, too. Because she already had open conversations with Oprah and Elton John’s husband about deals for content.

If I were her, I’d know what big ticket items would make the most money. I’d know what would be needed to build up hype or public interest surrounding those big ticket items, too. The first post-megxit interview. The first official introduction of the children. The major milestones linked to the BRF that could be milked to remind the world why they’re in our faces. But… one specific event would really be a cash cow.

Reunions and reconciliation interviews always captivate the masses. Especially in the US. What better way than to create an entire nexus of cash grabbing potential by fueling a rift between the besotted princess who didn’t belong and the very man who gave her that charm, her own father?

So, when MM was sitting in her Royal residence plotting her “Exit Stage Left", it would’ve been common sense to see the potential in a feud with “Daddy". Nobody in the 21st century uses written letters to argue long distance. The letters were the vehicle to make the feud real, and it became the vehicle to keeping the feud relevant.

I wholeheartedly believe the People Magazine article was a signal to TM from MM. I believe that article signaled TM because it was the first time the letter was ever made public. I believe she knew she could sue for privacy before she ever wrote the words. And I believe the intention was to create this rift narrative that could be used to cash in on the press while keeping relevant in the press.

Every time her father comes out to speak out and beg forgiveness, it keeps her in the press, too. The lawsuit wasn’t expected to go this way, but either way, it keeps them in the press. Every interview from TM reminds us all of MM and her ties to the BRF. It builds this animosity and creates this ongoing saga of drama that the media thrives from. While all this pressure and friction builds, so does their relevance and fame. Eventually, the time will come when the picking is ripe, and that plot line of Markle V Markle will climax.

That climax will play out in the press. I can’t even imagine the quotes for compensation for when that time comes. The Royal Reconciliation interviews could bank millions upon millions. Billions if they reveal the children at the Royal Reconciliation. Could you imagine the Prime Time Ratings the night the Royal Reconciliation airs?

I can hear the voice over now…

“For the last several years, the world has been taken on a rollercoaster ride of emotions. From broken hearts and betrayal to health scares and death threats, the world has watched the drama between Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex and her estranged father, Thomas Markle, Sr. play out in the media. No hope of reconciliation has ever been seen.

Until tonight...

Tune into the CBS Special this Sunday night, when Gayle King sits down with Meghan, The Duchess of Sussex and her father for the FIRST TIME since his daughter married a British Prince and second son of Diana. PRINCESS OF WALES.

But wait… you won’t believe it!

For the first time ever, the world will meet both Archie and Lili… at THE SAME TIME as Thomas Markle, SR. You don’t want to miss this historic moment!”

Then a few weeks later, Netflix will announce a show called “Royally Grandpa" where TM and MM star in a reality show or mini series showing their “journey as a family after reuniting”. I’d almost bet on it.

When TM replied to MM, he said in his letter that they should just suck it up and pose for a photo to quash the rift rumors. He told her that even if they have to fake it, they should come and do a press release together. He was giving her an out. Instead of taking the route literally everyone advised her to take, she chose her own path.

Now why would literally everyone but MM think that the best, most efficient way to quash the Markle Wedding drama was a reunion? The Knauf emails show that PC and the BRF were pressuring MM and PH to go see TM and put to rest the drama. But she chose to write that infamous letter. And even dear “Daddy" wrote back saying a get-together would be the best way to end the drama in the press.

But, no. Even when her own father told her exactly what he wanted to end the press coverage and interviews, she didn’t. Why? If she really wanted it all to stop as she claimed, why not do exactly what is needed to stop it? Why write a letter instead?

Because, ladies and gents, this was all a ruse to keep her relevant and eventually make her wealthy when it comes time. She knew what her father wanted, and the BRF told her what they wanted from her, too. Even with all that information, she still got it wrong and chose a letter.

A letter that could spin a lawsuit. A lawsuit that could reinforce the rift. A rift that could fuel the press and keep her in the news. News coverage that would keep her ex-royal life relevant, even remind people of her privilege and titles. Relevance and interest that could bank a multi million dollar deal for that special Royal Reconciliation.

So that’s what I think. Mainly because of their own words, but also because I see TM like I saw my mother. Manipulative people, you know, the people really good at conning, learn that behavior from someone when they’re children. Some are born naturals, but most of the time… the trait is a learned behavior. MM is who she is because of the parents she saw growing up. I know this personally.

Cons recognize cons. Just because one stops doing the bad things they used to do doesn’t mean they forget how bad things can be done by others. Like addiction, the behaviors don’t leave you when you are in recovery. Part of recovery is changing bad behaviors or learning how to use immortal traits for good causes. If you can use your skills to raise money for kids with cancer, do so safely. But even then that is risky behavior. Regardless, recognizing it when others pull the very cons you used to pull never stops.

I know who I am. I am not ashamed of my shortcomings. Secrets make us sick. Shame makes us sicker. Either way, I struggle with accepting TM and MM are really estranged. Doesn’t add up to me.