#but I gotta admit I kinda get why my dad thought it was a pokemon when he saw it

[topios]

They call it the Lernean bone hydra, but let's be honest the game's version is pretty darn stylized... I tried my hand at a slightly less so version. It caught itself a Chrustacean to snack on!

[kaitawrites]

Random Anime Opinions from a POC that will probably make you hate me :)

DISCLAIMER: These are only my opinions and things that I believe in. Nothing about it is canon. Once again my OPINION. Nothing is a fact.

- Eren probably doesn't know hygiene. That man is a feral killing machine. And you think he cares if people say he stank? I'm pretty sure he would kill the person just for saying that tbh. Especially if they MARRRLEEEY. So If I see one more fic of Eren having a sense of fashion, I'm going to shake my head.

- Shigaraki has a mommy kink. He's a mama's boy. (I hate and love mama boys. But there are certain ones that I hate with a burning passion) But Shigaraki is a good mama's boy. The one that is touch starved and needs cuddles even though he doesn't want to admit it.

- Deku's theme song is Gangsta's Paradise by Coolio, specifically because people see him as black/Asian because of his hair type compared to others.

- My hero fans need to stop with the Broke Uraraka jokes because most of the time it is going way too damn far. I get it's a joke but Jesus christ Momo is not gonna bash Uraraka for not having a few dollars for the club.

- Bakugo is not hot bro. You just see yourself in him and you like yourself. Bakugo is literally the type to date his damn self to prove that he's amazing in every aspect. But that man is a literal virgin. There is no way he would be a sex god you guys be praising him to be. He is the type to never lose his virginity cause he "never" losses.

- Kirishima had an emo phase in middle school. (This is lowkey canon) He had the black hair and he would wear chains. And that's why he didn't have a lot of friends because they thought he was weird. (Don't come at me for that because I love Kirishima to death. He's a sweetheart)

- I never want to put racism onto a character. But in my head, Denki acts so black. I don't know why- I don't know where it came from. But I feel as though he is the type to take after Africain American culture. From the music to the clothing styles. Probably even hair styles but that would be too far. But Denki would be the type to enjoy AA culture. I mean Idon't blame him.

- Denki is also a crackhead. And any fic you read that's him being on drugs like vape or weed. I personally thinks it's true. They are in high school, there will always be a high kid in HIGH school. It's in the name. And a High story Denki had is of a guy in a white van trying to kidnap him using candy as fucking bait. I mean Denki's dumbass would actually get halfway kidnapped until he starts rambling about Pokemon. He looks like Pikachu literally. And he was probably compared to Pikachu all his life. So Of course he likes Pokemon, he thought Pikachu was his bestie.

- Let's move on from My hero and go to Jujutsu Kaisen because please the things i have to say-

- Gojo is a whole man child with no hoes. Wait it's either he has no hoes or he has a lot of hoes. Too many hoes that he can't keep up with. There is no in between. Gojo had a my little pony phase, his favorite was rainbow dash and Princess Celestia. (Geto's favorite was Princess Luna) Gojo still watches my little pony but only Itadori knows because Itadori likes my little pony too. He thinks the concept of the show is inspiring.

- Sukuna would say the n word. Point blank period. He says it. Itadori will never be able to listen to rap songs made by black people the same.

- Itadori loves Hispanics/Latinos. I know damn well as a kid he had vine and followed Lele Pons and lusted the hell out of her until he realized she was kinda flat. And began his lust for Jennifer Lopez (in the manga it says Jennifer Lopez) and Megan thee stallion.

- Toji is also not a sex god. That man is sexy as hell but he isn't a sex god. Wait... Now that I am thinking. I feel like he knows his way around but I just think he's rusty. Too busy being a shit dad and killing curses with his glock.

- Nobara is a bad bitch and If I hear a single bad thing about her. It's either imma block you or I will slap you. It depends on if you say it in front of me or over the internet. She was smoking hot when she got affected by the curse that made black roses go all over her face and arm. People that don't like Nobara is just ugly. And you can't tell me otherwise.

- And Megumi, lord have mercy. Megumi deserves to be in Tokyo Revengers. HE PROBABLY WAS IN TOKYO REVENGERS. He's gotta be Baji's cousin or something. They both got that crazy look in their eyes.

- Megumi is also a city boy. Just like his daddy (Gojo i mean) And you can't tell me he has girls waiting on line for him. Because he doesn't own a single ugly bone in his body. Have you seen his demigod of a father? Megumi was like Jotaro in school. The silent shut the fuck up or I'll beat you to a pulp type. And those types are always the best at dropping panties. Sooner or later, Megumi is going to learn from his father and become a dilf.

[ninja-go-to-therapy]

The Ninja as Things My Friends and I Have Said

My friend keeps a quote-book and I thought y’all would enjoy this lol

Jay: say your last words to me, I’m about to be smited

Jay: I am so bright, I am star

Kai: Pickles and Dick Jay: Pickle my dick? Kai: PICKLE AND DICK! Lloyd: TICKLE MY DICK?

Kai: I want to play hot potato with a hand grenade

Lloyd: this chocolate milk mocks me

Kai: Can we all agree that when Jay walks he looks like a flamboyant gay drag-queen toddler

Lloyd, looking at a tampon: is that a cheese stick?

Kai: Where you at you little hoe?

Cole: Don’t do gay it’s not healthy 

Jay: I live life as a pirate. Because a pirate is free

Jay: The sun's only up for half the year in Alaska Cole: We have that too. It's called nighttime

Morro: Lick his nuts, they have a sorta Mexican flavor

Kai: I need to be surrounded with seven beautiful naked women in order to sleep at night

Lloyd: You know how there's like a line between bravery and stupidity? Nya: Jay is that line

Jay: Disclaimer: I am an anxious bean

Wu: It’s not your fault but it is your problem

Cole: I can't keep a straight face anymore. It's gay now.

Lloyd: That was such a late reaction it could've been my dad coming back

Zane: DISCO PENIS

Kai: I wanna stand around and look GORGEOUS

Kai: I'm outrageously good-looking Zane: No you’re not

Lloyd: I admit when I'm wrong! Kai: Oh yeah. But I'm like never wrong!

All of the ninja, always: It would be so much fun to hurt a bad person

Zane: what state do I live in? Jay: depression

Kai: cool onesie... can I get inside it?

Lloyd: They call me Santa. I bring snow to the children.

Kai: Don't fucking giggle you little shit.

Nya: I will beat you with a meat stick

Cole: You moan more than the dumpster out back

Wu: Don't stick the plungers on your foreheads!

Garmadon: whY are you SMelLING the plungers?

Zane: How does one piss in a watermelon?

Lloyd: When I become 99 pounds I'm going to eat a pound of chicken nuggets so I can be 1% chicken nugget. It's indisputable.

Cole: It smells like SHIT. Like it smells kinda okay now, but it still smells like shit. So it's like. Perfumeshit

Jay: Your socks are untied

Lloyd: Morro can just molest himself

Jay: Can you please not get a fucking locker smaller than my self esteem

Zane: You be smellin your own shit soon Jay: I already do Zane: Get it? Cause your mom gay. Everyone: ...what?

Lloyd: My name's Lloyd and I wear shoes sometimes

Nya: Unlike Skylor, they actually like balls

Kai: Fuck fuck fucking fuck fucking fucktown

Jay. I’m about to go commit space heater in bathtub

Kai: Vaccines make you gay

Lloyd: It’s not because I’m Asian, its because I eat rice so much

Zane: Hi. I’m Zane. ... my dick fell off

Kai, to Lloyd: Your dad is my fuckbuddy. ... wait. Shit.

Lloyd: You didn’t miss. You hit me right in the fucking nipple.

Kai: Eat my dick

Nya. Bite off your own dick

Cole: Your face looks like you're trying to make your dick fall off

Lloyd: So we were sitting watching TV eating macaroni with a fruit roll-up soaking my feet in a trashcan

Jay: I’m gonna go commit visit Pompeii in time machine

Jay: How can spiders fall from the ceiling and just skrrrrt away

Kai: Because none of us can speak proper sentences

Kai: Hold on. I'm sending a meme. I can't fight.

Jay: Engulf your own dick

Jay: Please don’t have a Boston tea party in my back yard

Kai: Still it felt like I committed a minor crime in Iran with all the water in my nose

Jay: Sensei Wu, please throw scissors... I kinda wanna die

Kai: I got royally fucked

Jay: Get your meaty luscious legs

Jay: The fuck you mean take my pants off? They're always on! Cause no one wants me to take them off!

Lloyd, picking up a napkin and seeing food fall out: IT’S BIRTHING 

Zane, threateningly: Give me your kidneys 

The Overlord: Where is your technology stored?

Zane: I can balance my body on my boner and spin like a beyblade

Kai: My balls are not a muscle

Cole: So apparently I'm not the only one with asymmetrical balls. Lloyd: Wait actually? Cole: Well yesterday Kai gave us a very descriptive description of his balls

Zane, sarcastically: Gosh darn don’t you hate it when you're not allowed to bring your 5 dollar footlong subway to training

Lloyd: So he poked me in the back with a pencil and my third grade self was like, "BLASPHEMY"

Kai: You.... dickmuncher

Jay: We're playing infinity Life. It's like Life but the cars are infinity stones.

Kai: I could have divine gay sex and it would still be nohomo.

Cole, during some super serious training: Bake me into a pie daddy

Kai: a compliment sandwich, like this: I like your shoes, YOU SUCK, your eyes are pretty

Zane, to Lloyd: Don't KILL her! Too much paperwork!

Jay: Stop moving your butt. It's uncomfortable when you clench it

Cole: The STICK.. will be UP YOU! Kai: My ASS is your spot!

Jay, teaching Kai to roller skate: First, we master walking  

Kai: I know I’m beautiful and perfect and amazing and huMBLE

Lloyd: I'm here for a good time, not a long time.

Cole: I'm allergic to emotions!

Zane: Yeet is not a valid Scrabble word

Kai: I love myself 3000. And you should, too. Love yourself, that is. Unless you wanna love me as well, cause that’s cool too.

Zane: Is doing drugs illegal

Lloyd: Post-traumatic stress? More like spicy memories

Jay: Be quiet so I can see

Cole: Why is my wallaber grinding its ass on the floor?

Kai: Whatever, my ass cheeks are balanced ... just as all things should be

Garmadon: IT WOULD BE SO MUCH FUN TO MAKE SOMEBODY THINK YOU WERE GONNA HIT THEM WITH YOUR CAR!

Sensei Garmadon: First of all, nobody says they're fine when they're good

Lloyd, getting himself a donut: A chocolate frosted donut for a chocolate frosted child

Nya, about Harumi: I just loathed her at first sight. Like your dad!

Morro, about Lloyd: He reminds me of a cucumber.

Cole, after becoming human again: I’m like Jesus... I thirst

Lloyd, sipping apple juice out of a shot glass: I'm just... done, ya know

Jay: Zane was eating my popcorn and I was like "hey that's my popcorn!" And he looks me dead in the eye and goes "surprise communism!"

Lloyd: I consumed a spatula

Jay: I almost burned down my house making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich

Zane, after Jay climbs on his back: Unmount me you heathen.

Kai: Yeah it's been such a dick-licking long time

Karlof: In Metalonia we do not have sister, we have brother with pussy

Zane: I want to delete my meatsack

Little Lloyd: At about 10 I was so hungry so I went to the med tent and pretended to be fainting so I got crackers

Garmadon: Before we leave I'm gonna sing a Disney song to attract all the females. Especially Misako

Jay, about to get sunburned: I know right, sunscreen is gross, you look like a glazed donut after you put it on

Cole: I like nuts but not that much. ... both kinds... I like my own nuts.

Zane: Hi I’m Zane and I’m the only one in this group with any form of common sense

Lloyd: Oh there's just someone throwing up over there! Kai: That’s hot

Cole, having a cashew thrown at him: I don’t want to swallow your nut ... I DON’T WANT YOUR NUT

Lloyd: My uncle is  going to sacrifice my body

Kai: Okay. You ALL can eat MY ass

Lloyd: A picture will last longer than your family will

Garmadon: That last rep was like a hydroflask and this one was like a kleankanteen

Kai: I bet for a second he was like "oh my God they care about me"

Kai: Because no one would be ballsy enough, no pun intended, to whip his dick out and piss on a crowded bus

Jay: Fuck a duck Lloyd: Please just dont ..ff... a duck Jay: But the duck likes it. It goes quackquackquackQUACKAFLACK.

Lloyd: Digiorno? More like I'm fucking hungry

Lloyd: My socks are so wet tis but a small price to pay for salvation

Kai: No means no muchacho

Dareth after failing at spinjitzu: Now I'm just dizzy and my ass hurts

Zane: I said, Cole, don’t orgasm in public, it’s rude, and Cole started moaning as loud as humanly possible

Lloyd: Say cheese! Kai: Whiskey!

Jay: Who the fucking dammit

Jay: Spongebob square-nuts

Jay: Actual- ACTUALLY it WOULDN’T make me more of a smartass because my SMART has yet to be caught up with my ASS

Lloyd: I hate it when my foot becomes the itch

Kai: STDs are like pokemon, you gotta catch em all

Kai: Here y’all are like "I like them 'cause of how they hold themselves and whatnot" and I’m just like “GIRL PRETTY"

Cole: I hate it whenever my foot becomes the gay.

Kai: I’m shit at being a person, not a shit person.

Zane: Buses turn me on

Jay: No pissing in our VSCO hangout!

Lloyd: Are y’all on high?

Kai: Its gotta warm up to start lavaing, now it’s just lamping.

Kai, crying: When I was crawling through the sewer my hair got stuck in my knee pit and ripped out a chunk

Lloyd, deepthroating a plastic recorder: I’m blonde so naturally, I'm good at this

Kai: I’m depressed. I’m stressed. But at least I’m well-dressed.

Lloyd: Nom nom milk carton

Cole, playing Life: Give me children

Jay, on a Thursday: If Friday was a Tuesday, it would be today

Kai: We're eating lotion and calling it spicy butter ... it’s spiritually spicy

Kai: I don’t fucking know! I'm not a cheese wheel!

Zane: Beepbeep bitch what's that? My lie detector smells a lie

Lloyd: I aced two tests today! The PSAT and the rice purity test!

Pixal: I don't really get the phrase "dry as bones" because your bones are in fact, wet

Cole: Kai, Kai, we can draw you as one of those anime girls. With humungous eyes. Actually no, it doesn't matter what the size of your eyes are. But your boobs are HUGE.

Lloyd: Jay wants to become the Alpha hoe

Cole: STOP TOUCHING MY HEAD AND SAYING IT FEELS GOOD

Jay: Deli sandwich equals cold hamburger

Lloyd: How was your day? Cole: Good. I have pie dough in my water bottle

Jay: If we do that we can reach our minimum requirement which is our goal

Kai: You can taste the freedom in that nacho cheese

Lloyd: I lust for the crust

Garmadon: You dirty-minded fools!

Anyone, to Skylor: You sucked the fire

Lloyd: OHMYGOD WE GET TO COLOR WITH CRAYONS!

Nya: Not to be lesbian or anything... but DAMN

Jay: No means no in Spanish

Kai: Bro saxophone is literally the sexiest instrument alive

Wu: The only wrong answers are the ones I don’t agree with

Kai: Look, why do you need to be a bottom to suck someone else's cock?

Cole: Jay, you suck Jay: More so than you do? Kai: Wait... wait you mean like you suck at the game or you’re better at sucking than he is?

Kai: WE CAN WANT YOU SEXUALLY TOO

Cole: That's not kinky, that's just abusive

Lloyd: CAN WE STOP USING THE TERM “BLONDE BITCH”

Cole: That’s not how you do it! Straddle me HO!

Kai: I didn’t mean to kick you in the coochie! Jay, I’m the distance: Be genital with her!

Cole: Yeah, also Jay tackled me and then grabbed me in between his legs and Kai jumped on top and Jay smacked his ass and I tried to record so Kai tried to smack my phone out of my hand and missed and his finger went right in my eye so I rolled over screaming and they got up and threw pebbles at me

Cole: It sounds naked! Music!

Kai, to anyone after they say Wu seems chill: He looks like a big soft squishy man but he is not

Zane: On average, in order to feel happy, you need to be touched, (pokes Jay) 8 times a day Kai raises two fingers on each hand: I’m about to make you ALL happy" *every person at the table in unison scoots away*

Zane: You looked like lord farquad but in a cute way!

Jay, after getting a pizza shoved at him. The pepperoni sanitized my facehole

Kai: I am the WITNESS! VICTIM! And I will play ... the e x e c u t i o n e r .

[lemonclemontadmin]

Lemon Siblings Oneshot: Tickle Fight 2

Another one ^^ In which Bonnie wins this time and beats her bro. Requested by  @prismtowerprincess. (I still take requests~)

Another fight lost to her brother added yet another tally mark to Bonnie’s ‘Extra Serious Chart’ on the door. 

The seven-year-old’s cheeks were puffed as she begrudgingly marked yet another set of five to the dozens she already had. All of these tallies represent the times Clemont beat her in past fights and they were written in blue ink. Bonnie’s on the other hand was still zero, and it made the girl sigh in frustration.

Just how does he do it? Bonnie often tried laying her own fingers on him so many times now but somehow, Clemont always got her in the end. Why are big brothers so mysterious? She’ll never know.

“Desperate times call for desperate measures Dedenne! I think it’s time we go for plan B!” Bonnie said one day to the orange mouse Pokemon. Dedenne tilted his head in curiosity. “De ne?” His caretaker nodded vigorously. “Yes you heard that right! Plan B! And it’s best to do it right now while Clemont’s at the gym!” She then formed a cheeky smile. “And I know exactly how we’re gonna do it…”

Bonnie had to wait until her father’s lunch break before she can unleash her plan.

Meyer wiped some sweat off his forehead while he listened to his daughter. The man looked quite amused and his brow raised. “That’s an unusual question you’ve got there sweetie. Why do you ask?”

Bonnie averted her gaze and her cheeks puffed up before she began to speak. “It’s because Clemmy’s always beating me in our matches Daddy! I tried so hard to win but it’s impossible! I wanna know if there’s something I can do to beat him just for once!” She looked pleadingly at her father. “Do you know any good ways Daddy?”

The man put a hand to his chin in thought as he hummed. “Well it’s been a fairly long time since I last did something like that to your brother so I’m not so sure if my technique would work on him now…” He cast Bonnie a curious look. “Say, you’ve been watching him during those times now haven’t you? Tell me - How does he start all that?” The little girl tilted her head in thinking.

“Well the last time he beat me, he first tricked me into thinking he wouldn’t join our match and then when I tried to do something he…” Her eyes slowly widened in realization. “Of course! I know what he’s doing now! He uses pretend to get me distracted so he can attack without me noticing! Why did I not think of it sooner?”

Her face then fell at another realization. It was the fighting itself that remained and Bonnie is very well aware she’d have a disadvantage with Clemont. “Now there’s only one problem. How do I get him to surrender to me?”

Meyer looked at his daughter with a shrug. “It really depends Bonnie. For me, I’d say you go for his weaker spots that are guaranteed to send him bawling.” He paused for a sudden thought came to mind. “When it’s the two of you, where does he usually reach?” He received the answer from Bonnie, and then he chuckled. “In that case, I suggest you try that on him too. As far as I know those are delicate areas - If it were me I’d be laughing like there’s no tomorrow!”

Bonnie grinned. “You’re right daddy! Thanks for the advice I’m gonna try it on Clemont tonight!” She wrapped her arms around Meyer’s waist and the man patted his daughter’s head with an amused smile. Whatever his little girl had in store for her brother, Meyer could tell she’ll achieve it easily; It’s a little sister thing after all, and they always get their way somehow.

She chose the perfect time to initiate her attack; Right after dinner when Clemont’s just getting to bed after a washing-up.

The teenager was naturally exhausted after a whole day of his usual duties and he was ready to hit the sack. However, something, or someone, lying on his bed before him caused the teen to stop. Clemont blinked few times before frowning slightly. “Bonnie what are you doing here? You should be in your room..” He paused to yawn with a stretch - He really is tired. 

But Bonnie didn’t budge.

“I’m not in bed because you owe me a rematch Big Brother!” Bonnie said jubilantly, and Clemont’s tiredness vanished to surprise. “I wasn’t gonna let our last round stop me! So I trained myself for the whole day just for this!” When Clemont opened his mouth to protest, Bonnie pressed close to him pleadingly. “Pleeease? It won’t last long! It shouldn’t be since you’re the champ. I’m sure you can make this fast,” She winked mischievously as she nudged her brother with her elbow.

Clemont’s lower eye twitched for a second, and he sighed in relent. A little match with his sister wouldn’t hurt; Beating Bonnie would be so easy for him he can make her surrender in seconds if he has to. He chuckled confidently and his glasses flashed with white - He didn’t see Bonnie reaching behind her for something as he spoke while cracking his knuckles. “Okay you got me Bonnie. But for your information, I beat you last time and it’s just yesterday. There’s no way you can beat the champ-!”

PLOP!

Clemont’s glasses flew off his face landing safetly on the bedside desk and his head jerked to the side from the impact of a Teddiursa bear hitting his face. It caught him by surprise and he landed on his arm. A loud battle cry pierced the air and he felt the smaller body of Bonnie jump on him; Her fingers went straight for Clemont’s sides causing all earlier confidence to evaporate into horror. Why there? Anywhere but there! Somehow Bonnie had found his sensitive spot and it was something he was very unprepared for.

The teen gasped and broke into intense fits of laughter! “B-Bonnie get your hands out of there!! S-Stop! I c-can’t breathe!” He tried to fight his own thrashing in trying to get Bonnie off of him. His efforts only made the girl giggle and continue digging her fingers into her brother’s sides.

“No way Clemont! Not until I win and you surrender! I can do this all night if I have to!” She grinned deviously and went on, relishing in the intense laughter coming from her brother, finally in her favour. She didn’t see Meyer watching her and Clemont from the door.

The father tried his best not to chortle. But his son’s laughter was contagious and the sight of him being downed by his baby sister alone is already hilarious as it is. Finally the fight went on a bit too long now and Meyer decided to step in before Bonnie could take all the breath out of Clemont’s lungs; Even then it was difficult to keep a straight face for the kids. “Bonnie I think it’s time to give your brother a break. Otherwise he’ll really break before he could get one,” He chuckled at his own joke.

Bonnie looked up at him briefly. “No daddy! Not until he surrenders! That’s the number one rule!” She continued to tickle her brother like there’s no tomorrow. Poor Clemont was already gasping and turning hoarse from all the laughing he began to cough at last. He feebly tried to dislodge Bonnie from himself as he choked out. “F-Fine! I surrender! I surrender! You can stop now!”

There was that miraculous stop of tickling and Bonnie leaned close to his face, eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Sorry, I can’t hear you. What was that?” She asked innocently. Clemont gasped and his head landed against the bed in sheer exhaust. “I surrender! You win! Just.. For Arceus’ sake, stop I’m begging you!” He whimpered out.

This caused Bonnie to instantly release him and her eyes sparkled with glee. For the first time in all her years of tickle fights, she finally won! Fair and square! “I won! I finally won! Woohoo!” She got off the bed in doing a little victory dance of her own, with a really tired Clemont and an amused Meyer watching her with smiles. An ‘ahem’ from the father made Bonnie freeze to look at him, and Meyer pointed a glance to the worn out Clemont; Bonnie felt sympathy wash over her and she climbed onto the bed.

The child climbed onto Clemont gently this time and hugged him by the neck, nuzzling him happily. “Thank you for letting me win Clemmy. It sure is fun doing this with you again,” She pulled away and Clemont, having finally caught his breath, lifted his head to gaze at his sister in total surprise and amazement. “Huh, I gotta admit it sure is. But I don’t get it - How did you know how to do that?”

Bonnie hummed innocently and shrugged. “Well you kinda taught me how to do that pillow thing. But as for the rest, daddy taught me that!”

Clemont’s jaw dropped and he slowly turned to look at his father at the door; Meyer had his thumbs twiddling as he whistled innocently, and Clemont whined. “Aw dad I should’ve known!” Meyer chuckled in amusement. “Sorry son, but your sister was desperate. Plus she really deserves a chance to win once in a while now doesn’t she?”

The teenager ran his hand across his head in a weak chuckle. “Of course she does. And I must say, I’m really impressed Bonnie. You did pretty good!” He closed his eyes and with a last exhale, he let himself fall back down against the bed in an exhausted heap. “Now if you don’t mind, I need a break. I still have a whole day tomorrow and it’s getting past your bedtime.”

To his relief, Bonnie is happy to oblige. She hugged Clemont one more time. “Goodnight Big Brother. Thanks again for tonight! I had so much fun!” With that, she left to join Meyer by the door and the father smiled at his son. “Sleep well son. Hope Bonnie made it easier for you to sleep now,” He joked and then he left to take Bonnie to her room.

Clemont only smiled after his father and sister before stretching with a yawn. His sides still ached like crazy, but that should go away. The teen soon fell asleep with no trouble at all.

[mahougirlfriend-archive]

pokemon journey au thoughts (tm): 

- sakuya and yuuya are the “rivals” of the story 

- sakuyas starter is a popplio given to him by yuuya... his journey starts with him running away from home entirely, more interested in becoming a (better) trainer (than yuuya) than remaining the family heir... yuuyas gift of a starter is what ultimately convinced him to leave, though he would never admit it and even treats his pokemon more as underlings rather than partners on his team for the first part of journey 

- yuuya very much does not consider himself sakuyas rival, but is more than willing to play along if it helps motivate sakuya to get himself away from the le bel father 

- ryouta is a nurse in training! her mother is a pkmn nurse, and they own their own center, but more often than not ryouta finds herself both running the center and taking care of her sickly mother,, 

-(sighs) her mother passes away before ryouta enters the story, and we first meet her when sakuya pushes his popplio too hard in training and has to rush them to the nearest pkmn center,, he finds himself bursting through the doors of a center that appears to be shut down, if not for the girl crying behind counter 

- ryouta, never one to turn down a pokemon in need, opens the center for him... she really chews him out for pushing his pokemon too hard, and he like,, knows that he shouldnt be doing that and he knows how much his popplio cares for him and cares for them so much too but he has so much bad shit ingrained in his head that he STILL tries to argue, albeit very weakly, that his pokemon are his own to do what he wants with them (ryouta could barely hear him,, hes in a waiting room shair with his knees drawn to his chest and he cant look at her) 

- ryouta honestly doesnt know how to respond other than by telling him she doesnt feel comfortable giving his popplio back to him if he feels that way 

- sakuya kinda has a panic attack abt that and like genuinely opens up to this stranger about why he feels the need to push himself n his team so hard (pressure from his shitty dad) which ryouta doesnt like. agree w or think is a good excuse but she defs relates becus shes done plenty of things under the guise of ‘gotta do what i need to for my parents sake’ (very different situations but like,, still) 

-  i just realized how long this post is im writing the outline for a fic now asjhsjk so uh long story short ryouta shares a little bit of her situation as well n ultimately decides to go with sakuya on his journey! bro they are teens,, they are disagreeing on things but still relate on deep level,, bro they are growing closer as friends now,, now theyre realizing how much they care for the other,,, bro,,,,, 

- oh also instead of “gary was here, ash is a loser” its “YUUYA WAS HERE! sakuya is doing a great job!” 

thats all im putting here but uh ask me about the part of the au where nageki is a yamask jhdaasfjkdfas 

[kaizerinj]

When ya realize your headcanon went.....waaaaaaay off the beaten path, but it was done so subtly it takes years before you realize how awry it really went.

or

where I went wrong with Falkner&his dad’s relationship, but like 10+ years later I’m not bringing myself to fixing it. Cuz fuckkit. Seriously, fuck that.

In the beginning, there was GSC!Falkner. He had like five lines. The only mention of his father being immediately after you defeat him.

...Darn! My Dad's cherished bird Pokémon...

It was an effort to give characterization to an otherwise 2D Important Obstacle, which...uh....still doesn’t sit well with me. Guy’s a damn gym leader. Be one on your own merits. But I liked him. He was cute. Attractive. And me just starting my “baby yaoi fan!phase”? Magic in the form of honorshipping. 

But oh

oh

the anime happened. And this is where I lost sight of canon.

Ash had participated in the Indigo League. He had just beaten the Orange League. He was stepping into a brand new region full of new pokemon and new challenges. He needed suitable opponents that seemed strong.

So here comes this guy who saves his Pikachu, who bonds with him over Pidgeot, then proceeds to be the guy he’s gotta beat for a badge.

Well, whoops.

This Falkner’s a good guy, who, sure, admits it’s awkward to suddenly have to battle when you weren’t excepting to need to, since Pidgeot!lover, but his game face is stern, serious shit. He’s not going to go easy on you just because you’re friends.

....I fell in love with this version so hard you guys you don’t even know

But this was during the years where episodes were not just easily available on the internet. You had to wait for.....

shudder

repeats on TV.

So. Parts of this episode actually escaped me while I was happily mushing Falkner and Morty’s faces together, and his friendliness kind of fell off my brain as I focused on one fact and one perception: he was a self-made Trainer, and his stern, no-nonsense battle style = anger.

There was one thing the game did try to make clear, too. If Falkner’s using his father’s pokemon...........................................where the hell is his dad?

Which came up as I started writing this fic called Status: Before Elitism, because I really wanted to delve into Falkner, Morty, and Whitney (and Karen, Clair, and Will)’s ascent into the positions they hold in GSC. Kids have parents, right?

So not going the “he’s dead ” route, Daddy became the guy who’s never there. ....#neitherwasmymom ANYWAY. In my mind, the dad was some wandering adventurer type who wasn’t at all content to stay in one place, leaving his son to be groomed by his mom, into the no-nonsense persona Falkner, in my mind’s eye, had grown to be. Mom was strick, traditional, and a hard lady. Not unloving, but she grew colder as the years went on, because the guy she loved was never. Fucking. Home. She had a temple and monks to manage.

Oh, right, religion.

...how’d that happen.

So here we are! Current headcanon: anime-warped Falkner (has a temper) with half a game!Falkner detail (dad is where?) apart of a traditional Japanese sect thing (anime setting).

Side note: Adventures fucking makes up Falkner’s dad during the GSC years! Named Hayate. Dubbed Roy (????!?!?!) by some Serebii rando who can’t be assed to just use the J!names (Coronis [!!!?!?!?!?]). Dubbed Wayne by Chuang Yi (why). Dubbed Wren by me. ....I hate Adventures but man

mAN

Hayate is DIL(not really)F.

Ooowph.

So with this, the man who abandoned his kid and sometimes returns has a face, and that’s what his dad became. And how can you fucking admire a guy like that.

How.

HOW.

So naturally, we have unconsciously reached the point that Falkner cannot, at all, ever be happy with his dad entirely.

Plus note: headcanon’d Corey from Mewtwo Strikes back as Falkner’s younger brother, so Dad has abandoned TWO kids. TWO. What a dick.

Just to note: I held onto, and still have, the canon that Falkner’s original haircolor was green. I held onto it so hard I strangled it and had to justify the discrepancy between the blue and green with the shade changing colors over the course of his life. But the green hair was important.

Because then, the DP anime happened, and Dad’s headcanon became so. Much. Worse.

Dad was, at this point, just a vagabond and a deadbeat. But then, he was an adulterer. In Sinnoh. And suddenly, there was just no reason for Falkner to like him in my head, because Falkner now had two emerald green-haired half siblings across the damn world.

Oops?

I did always kinda maintain my position this was anime!verse though I do tend to bleed anime and game at points, so with no mention of his father in it, I could be comfortable that there was no true canon divergence from the games.

....

"You do? Just as I thought! You know something? I'm sure we'll enjoy talking about my dad! Here is my number! Give me a call Saturday morning if you want to hear about my dad!"

fUCK

I mean this means he’s still alive at least, right??

#neverencountered

"I'll show you the real power of the magnificent bird Pokémon! Dad! I hope you're watching me battle from above!"

GOD DAMMIT.

(It was, at the time, minorly debated if this meant Dad was dead or if....yanno.....flying..... Thanks for that ambiguity.)

(I want to point out that, since FRLG came out, Adventures was quietly toted as being ‘correct’ when it came to eventual canon, given it took the hints of Silver being Giovanni’s son and ran with it like it was true [it was, but this was pre-HGSS], as well as pitting Janine v Falkner during the Johto GLs v Kanto GLs, putting them into connection well before HGSS did. [Then Kusaka’s precognition came crashing down with the Striaton trio = Shadow Triad theory being debunked, when he was setting it up to be a believable reveal. HA..........sobs])

But I wasn’t really bothered, ultimately. Again, I primarily based myself in the anime!verse, but it’s only recently I’ve come to mull a little bit over how Falkner kind of got away from me overall as he self-developed over the course of his existence. And it really does come down to his relationship with his dad, because you can’t really say you’re being canon-compliant, despite not taking place in a universe where it’s unknown what their relationship is. I like being canon-compliant. I like making canon do my bidding.

But I can just not get behind Falkner having a good relationship with his dad, if he’s alive. Nor can I get behind Falkner’s abilities as a Trainer using someone else’s team, unless it’s in his dad’s memory, because the anime showed me something differenct. But the games also don’t layer anything into this, just leaves it bare boned and rather plain, so there’s this nice, gasping hole in Falkner’s game!character that cannot be stitched closed.

......I am legit miffed the father was never easter egg’d into the series. I want his side, if only to have more insight into my fave. Sure, that would just make my headcanon complete garbage in the eyes of overall canon. But I’m so curious.

Bonus fact: VIZ dubbed him Walker and this fit so perfectly into my headcanon, and overall works as a surname.

Because who else’s surname in the anime is Walker?

Someone else with affinity for the Flying type.

[crow-caller]

all the oc question because what even is sense of scale. (or, in case you do happen to possess a sense of scale: 2, 11, 20, 21)

you gotta live life fast and hard

a l l

you can use my /ocs page for background LORE

1. who's your favorite oc?

it’s michael. WE ALL KNOW THIS

it’s michael.

he’s terrible but my friend and I love him

2. who was your first oc?

I suppose Asterix? Counts? I’ve revamped her into ASTER but she was technically an OC back in the day, even if I did nothing with her but... imagine

here she is:

she is... well, she was a total mary sue type. oh my. had red hair with blue tips (or vise versa?) naturally, her mom tried to kill her but a kyogre saved her life and she grew up with team magma as an admin (her dad was leader) but her mom was an admin of team aqua. and she was raised by the legendary pokemon who could turn into human forms, and Ho-Oh was a god of the universe and took her under his wing...

and then she became a god thanks to genetic experiments and got her own planet and traveled the galaxy saving alien species from planets that were about to be destroyed. also preforming experiments on human children. she had tons of kids and they were all girls.

she also could turn into a purple wolf with black wings and feathers in the fur...

3. how many ocs do you have?

I did a count and I think like exactly 50 technically. most are termi, AR has 4, GA is like 8, MSQ is like 8

4. have you kept all of your ocs since the beginning?

Funny!! I almost always forget... about this but there was a character who was CUT from terminal!! both my head lore and like the book. Two charas were cut from book, actually: Roy (a conspiracy freak/revolutionary Mannie runs into and used to be friends with) and Tom (Christina’s younger brother, who lived with her on Earth). Tom was someone I just realized wasn’t needed, never showed up, never did anything, and didn’t like. Roy was a minor part easy to cut.

but most of my OCs... like I said, MSQ is a revamped ‘tales of asterix’, so most of those old OCs have been reborn. A few didn’t get a chance to show up in MSQ but if there was a sequel, they would (Yggdrasil, Mary, Chaos)

I’m gonna mention it next Q but I had a fandom OC once too.

5. are any of your ocs based off of a show/book you like? if so, who?

I don’t really do fandom OCs!! I never write fanfiction or anything.

the MSQ charas mentioned above: like I said, MSQ used to be a crazy mary sue crossover adventure I lived in my head, so while the new charas are quite diff from their canon ones (enough that I can change the names and promise nothing is being stolen), Yggdrasil is from Tales of Symphonia and Chaos is from sonic the hedgehog. They were both OCs of mine in that they really had limited connection to canon LOL.

I also used to have an invader zim oc?? Her name was Kalat and she was weird I guess? I don’t remember much, I do have some DOCs about it. she was an idiot who wanted friend- HEY WAIT A SECOND

6. what is the species of the majority of your ocs?

Because of Termi, the majority is certainly demon! I like angels waaaay more than I like demons, but termi takes place in hell, and most of the cast is demons. I have minority humans, actually. MSQ has some gods/aliens, but it would go Demons Angels Humans.

7. are any of your ocs an original species? if so, what's the species and who?

Not really. Only one would be Ikina from MSQ, but they are still based on... they call themself an ‘incubus’ because they are a sex-fluid shapeshifting creature which is energized through sex (and steals energy through their partner).

8. if you can, draw (oc name)!

heres an old doodle I found.... it is OBSCENE (iofiel holding hands with maalik)

9. write a few sentences as (oc name)!

People always seem to forget that I’m the center of the goddamn universe.

That’s just a good line. This is a tough prompt IDK what any of my OCs would say. I need context.

“hi my name is iofiel angel of beauty and I love friends I just want to collect as many friends as I can have, and hug them, because friendship is magaical and fun”

10. are any of your ocs part of a story? if so, what is it about and who's in it?

TERMINAL TRILOGY is about mentally ill people being dicks to each other

MSQ/THE ASCENSION is about a very nonplussed kid being made into a god against her will

GA/GOOD ANGEL is about an angel who just wonders, why can’t we all just get along?

AR/ANGEL RADIO is about one girl who is very, very alone, except for the weirdo aliens

11. do you have any twin ocs?

Just one! Michael and his sister Lucky.

I don’t think I’ve drawn Lucky in a long time, not digitally at least. she has importance but is still very minor.

Chrstina is part of a set of triplets (two brothers, they are identitcal)

I don’t have many sibling/family relationships in general!

12. are any of your ocs siblings?

Michael has a big family: Gabriel, Raphael, URiel, and Lucky

Christina is from a set of triplets, also has an older brother and two younger sisters

Kell probably had an older brother

Umbel has a set of sisters as main characters, there’s siblings in Radicle too

13. what is the gender of the majority of your ocs?

It’s legit 100% an even 50/50. well, like 49/51, slightly more dudes, and there is one NB chara. I always feel like I favor men but it turns out it’s quite even

14. make up a new oc right now based on (concept/show/color/etc.)!

EFF OFF

I actually really need to make a new OC soon for a new project coming up... but btoh my potential choices I’ve been having a hard time being creative lately.

I think she’s going to be very average type, and it’s set in the real world too, which I’ve never written before? so it’s hard. good thing I like to steal from myself?

she’s very book smart but hasn’t done a lot. Got into an ivy league-ish school but isn’t like, amazing, just smart enough to have made it. Kinda rich, some connections, so she kinda thinks that’s why she made it. Wants to be weirder, do stranger things, but is very paranoid, anxiety.

but that’s so generic!!! so boring. I need to figure a way to make her more interesting. the story is about secret societies and demons N stuff. maybe I should make her more of a wild card and base her on the side of me that loves cults

that’s it. her secret obsession. her special interest: cults. she just loves conspiracy theories cryptids and CULTS. and ends up getting involved in real ones.

15. would you ever give up any of your ocs?

WHO IS ASKING

16. who is your oldest oc (age-wise)?

some of the MSQ ones are like immortal gods, so it’s probably.... Eii in that case.

Archangel Michael from GA would be about as old as the universe...

In Termi, one of the angels is likely to be about 230.

17. have you ever roleplayed as your ocs?

back in the day, I did have profiles! I don’t think I ever used them, but slightly before I began writing termi I wrote up roleplay profiles for Christina and Percy from Terminal.

Here it totes is (note it is all not that canon for termi now):

Name: Percy Gender: MaleAge: Very old, though his physical age is around 19.Species: Angel (Seraph)Appearance: Percy is tall and lanky. He has slightly curly blonde hair and unnaturally blue eyes. He typically will dress either in a terrible sweater-vest and shabby coat, and favors very plain clothing styles. He also hates tight or uncomfortable clothes. He needs glasses to read, but would never admit it. He is a seraph, the highest sphere of angel below the Arch-angels, meaning he has way too many wings. Seriously, who thought six wings was a good amount? He is capable of hiding them, and typically flies with just one set. They are also light minty green.Personality: Percy can be really arrogant sometimes. He looks down one anyone he considers less then him, but often more in a piteous way. He does his best to be good and responsible, and especially feels the need to set a good example for the other angels. He is very unfamiliar with most human culture, as he only just recently came down to Earth for personal reasons...History: He has always served the Arch-angels, and he is content to do so. He doesn't have much of a history beyond that, as that is all his life has every known.

Name: Cris (Christina) Gender: FemaleAge: 17Species: Demon (lesser)Appearance: Cris used to have long, fluffy blonde hair. Now her hair shorter, and bright red. Her natural form includes curly black horns, somewhat red skin and a small arched tail, but she is able to change to a human form for disguise. Sometimes if she's surprised she will revert to demon again, but is quick to fix it. She likes hoodies, shorts and stockings, often in a very cliche black and red. She also likes to tie her hair up.Personality: She's pretty chill most of the time, but is easy to work up. She gets very excited by her favorite shows and books. Cris has a bit of a self-esteem issue, and occasionally feels really depressed about it. She's also sort of a wimp. And she loves cats.History: Cris was a human who sold her soul, but she doesn't really remember much of her life as a human. She knew she was blonde, and she knew she made a wish for attention. Everything else is missing. She doesn't really care much, and sort of likes being a demon. Because she's such a weak demon, she isn't very good at combat, and her job is basically an office job. It bores her, and she wants to get out (into sales, preferably). I also have an old profile of a pokemon OC who was part of team magma, and named Mack. I love magma.

18. how many of your ocs were adopted from someone else?

NONE

I MEAN I STOLE ARTEMIS FROM MY BROTHER

19. who is your least favorite oc?

Uh?? MIDORI from AR I just plainly have never liked. And Senya from MSQ. I just really don’t like them, and not because they are total jerks.

Midori is a bit annoying, she was mildly a response to some tumblr stuff at the time, and is a weirdo, overly soft wiccan who just wants to put flower crowns everywhere... I am exaggerating but I don’t know, she never clicked with me

Senya didn’t exist in the MSQ lore, he just showed up one day and hijcked the plot.

mido

senya is on the right

20. which oc do you think has changed the most since you made them?

Michael I bet? He really wasn’t much of anything in draft one of termi, he didn’t show up at all, and later showed up but only spoke in questions, and was very annoying. over the course of radicle I figured out who he was a lot better.

Aster is a good example of someone who changed a lot too, but I don’t count that as much. Mannie went from an angry ranting fool to a sad angry ranting fool I guess

21. who is your newest oc? optional- doodle them to show!

minor character in evergreen (terminal novella)

22. have you ever cosplayed your own ocs? if so, who?

no, but when I put on a button down and feel very tired, I think that counts as a closet cosplay of mannie

23. which oc do you think has affected you the most as you've grown with them?

michael................ my boy. he’s just kinda picked up a lot of my problems (EXAGGERATED) and evolved to carry and represent and deal with them. as mentioned, he didn’t really matter until he did

24. have you gotten cosplayers of your ocs? if so, of whom?

who the hell can answer this with a ‘yes’

25. do you have any ocs that you haven't drawn/written as/talked about in a long time? if so, who?

HMMMM??!??

I don’t talk about my AR ocs very often, or my MSQ ones.

you know what was crazy in AR? Gav’s original name was Paschar. I don’t remember where I got that from, but I changed it like 75% through with the book. Frigging paschar.

Eii and Ikina (left, right) are MSQ charas. Eii is based on Mew, Ikina is from Ho-Oh. They are... quite different from the original pokemon basis, I am legally obliged to note, but just wanted to say.

Eii’s role in the story was a total surprise, and a weird one. Writing blind lends itself to some odd plottwists.

[legendarypokemonstudies]

💭, any memory of Rui's

Ruianna was a little nervous, she'd admit, as she walked behind the Growlithe, who was wagging up a storm as he led her and the others to his own family.

The teen had wanted to make sure it was okay with his parents before she caught him, after all, she'd hate to take him from his family. Caden and Sigilla had tagged along with their Pokemon, as "moral support"

The puppy Pokemon happily wagged his tail, bounding towards the Arcanine in the clearing.

"Mom mom mom!! Guess what guess what!! Come on come on!"

The Arcanine smiled, looking down at the pup, who's head was a tad too big for his body, not that it seemed to be a problem.

"What is it Arko? What's got you so excited?"

Arko grinned, and if he wagged his tail any faster it seemed like he might take off and fly. "I helped this really nice person, and she said she'd love to be my trainer, but first she wanted to make sure it was okay with you and Dad!"

The Arcanine seemed a little taken aback, "Well that's certainly kind of her to want to let us know, where is she? Sadie, go get your father okay?"

The other Growlithe nodded, running off in a certain direction as Rui and her friends stepped out into the clearing.

"Hi, I'm Rui, this is my friend and Rival Caden, and my big Sister Sigilla. They wanted to come along too, and the Pokemon insisted on joining them in that, so here we all are."

She was a little perplexed, she wondered what kind of Pokemon Arko's father was, especially since his mom didn't have any unusual striping like he and the Growlithe who must've been his sister did.

Her question wouldn't go unanswered for very long, as a tall bipedal black and white badger-like Pokemon stepped out of the bushes. "Oh, so that's what this is about?"

The Arcanine turned to the very punk looking Pokemon, something that reminded her of the Pokemon her mom talked about there being back in her home region.

But Galar was very closed off, why would a Galarian Pokemon be in Sinnoh?

"Arthur, the pink-haired girl wanted to make sure it was okay with us if she caught Arko."

The badger-like Pokemon raised an eyebrow, walking over to the three teens to sis them out.

Rui was nervous, but stood her ground, while Tatha growled from her spot on the teen's shoulder.

Obsidian, who's horn was shorter was calm, absent-mindedly clawing shapes into the dirt.

"So, you wanna catch one of my pups?"

"Yes sir, I understand if you're against it, though I've gotta ask, are you from a place called Galar?"

The eyebrow rose higher.

"So what if I am? What's it to you punk?"

"I thought so, you sound kinda like my mom does, and she's talked about some of the Pokemon there. I was just curious."

Arko was still running around excitedly, unable to contain his happiness.

"Yer mum's Galarian? Sweet fanny adams it's a tiny world we live must live in, Arko don't bite yer ahrm off yer actin like yer full o' beans!"

"Sorry dad I'm just so excited!"

"Yeah I can see that. Now kid, tell me, Arko means a lot to us, he's part of the family, so why should I just let some stranger take one o' ma kids?"

The dark-type's eyes gazed at her wearily and he waited for an answer.

"Well, I care about him. He's different, so full of love, he deserves a chance to get stronger, to see the world. I know that there are people who would take advantage of it, and I know why you're worried."

She looked up at him, determined in a way.

"But I can assure you, I'm not one of them. I can try to bring him to visit you, or, if you wanted to make it easier to keep in contact, you could stay on my parents property. You could still be wild Pokemon, but I visit around the holidays, and whenever I'm in the area. It's where I send my Pokemon that aren't on my current team, and it would give you a better idea of the kind of people me and my family are."

She took a breath.

"It would keep trouble from cropping up, what with you being a Galarian Pokemon when the borders are closed, and my parents would provide a safe place for you and your kids. My father's a breeder, he breeds special Pokemon, who look different, like Obsidian. He's also part of an organization that protects against illicit breeding by enforcing regulations, and even taking down breeding rings. I understand if you're suspicious, you have every right to be, considering how you probably got here, but I'm not going to just take Arko away from you. It'd be wrong."

The Obstagoon looked thoughtful for a moment.

"I need to talk about it with Ember for a bit."

"Do you mind if we have lunch here then?"

"Not at all, go ahead."

The group had lunch, with the usual shenanigans of shooing Caden away from the fire and messing around, a Luxio roughhousing with a few of the other Pokemon, while Arko went over to join in, and was welcomed into the games they were playing while Rui and Sigilla fixed lunch, there were some clearly variant Pokemon there, with a Rotom buzzing about a Baltoy missing an eye and with sloppy markings, and a very odd Driffloon.

Later, the two approached the group, poker faced as Rui nervously awaited their answer, bracing herself for the worst.

"Well? Have you come to a decision?"

"Yes, after a bit or thinking on it, we can't be sure we can trust you to take care of Arko, he's got a bit of a... Disability? You could say."

Rui lowered her head, but nodded, trying to keep her eyes from tearing up.

"Oh come on now, that being said, where do yer parents live? We gotta know how you were raised up if we're gonna let you train our kid."

Rui's head shot up, surprised and incredulous.

"Wot, you thought we didn't notice the differences you 'ad? Come on now Lassie, we aren't edgits, don't give us that look!"

Rui cheered, and Arko yipped, tackling her down as she laughed, Caden and Sigilla grinning at the good news.