#but I got shamed out of those things for my sex and my weight

[not-gray-politics]

!!!!

“If a society puts half its children into short skirts and warns them not to move in ways that reveal their panties, while putting the other half into jeans and overalls and encouraging them to climb trees, play ball, and participate in other vigorous outdoor games; if later, during adolescence, the children who have been wearing trousers are urged to “eat like growing boys,” while the children in skirts are warned to watch their weight and not get fat; if the half in jeans runs around in sneakers or boots, while the half in skirts totters about on spike heels, then these two groups of people will be biologically as well as socially different. Their muscles will be different, as will their reflexes, posture, arms, legs and feet, hand-eye coordination, and so on. Similarly, people who spend eight hours a day in an office working at a typewriter or a visual display terminal will be biologically different from those who work on construction jobs. There is no way to sort the biological and social components that produce these differences. We cannot sort nature from nurture when we confront group differences in societies in which people from different races, classes, and sexes do not have equal access to resources and power, and therefore live in different environments. Sex-typed generalizations, such as that men are heavier, taller, or stronger than women, obscure the diversity among women and among men and the extensive overlaps between them… Most women and men fall within the same range of heights, weights, and strengths, three variables that depend a great deal on how we have grown up and live. We all know that first-generation Americans, on average, are taller than their immigrant parents and that men who do physical labor, on average, are stronger than male college professors. But we forget to look for the obvious reasons for differences when confronted with assertions like ‘Men are stronger than women.’ We should be asking: ‘Which men?’ and ‘What do they do?’ There may be biologically based average differences between women and men, but these are interwoven with a host of social differences from which we cannot disentangle them.”

— Ruth Hubbard, “The Political Nature of ‘Human Nature’“ (via gothhabiba)

Yes.

[joelsgoldrush]

“give me all of that ultraviolence” | 2k

logan howlett x f!reader

SUMMARY: You give Logan head for the first time.

WARNINGS/TAGS: mdni - smut 18+ implied age gap. dirty talk. kind of inexperienced reader. oral sex (m receiving). face fucking. dom!logan. a tiny bit of degradation. he guides you through the whole experience (shocking!!! i know)

AUTHOR’S NOTE: HI PALS!!! yes i'm alive and kicking. yes university is killing me. so recently i’ve been OBSESSED with this man and i needed to write something for him. english is not my first language and i may have made some mistakes (if you encounter any you can tell me, i won't mind it). comments/likes/reblogs would be highly appreciated. i've got sooooo many ideas to write and i'm finally getting my hands on them. i missed you all so fucking much. hope you enjoy this!!!

It’s common knowledge that all humans have needs. Try as you may, there’s a primitive side that you can’t spare yourself from. You, as everybody else, have urges.

“Logan,” you basically mewl his name, five letters that roll off your tongue with little effort. He doesn’t seem to acknowledge you, his kisses growing harsher on the delicate skin of your neck. Threading your fingers through his hair, you decide to try again, speaking a bit louder this time. “Logan, please.”

“What is it, honey?” he says, bitten lips still pressed to your pulse point. As you remain silent, he looks up at you, those big, brown eyes that you love so dearly almost completely dark now. “Do you want to call it a day?”

His question catches you off-guard. You cup his face, thumbs caressing his cheekbones, suddenly afraid that he might pull away from you. “No! Not at all. That’s- that’s not what I want at all, actually.”

“What do you want, then? You can tell me,” he kisses you on the lips, softly at first. What starts as nothing more than a sweet kiss turns into a needier one, his hard on poking you through your shorts. “Come on. Tell me, baby. What does my sweet girl want?”

“I want to suck you off, Logan,” you whisper as you latch your mouth onto his, and you can feel how he visibly tenses beneath you. His breath hitches in his throat when you grind your hips. “I really need it.”

From the very beginning of your relationship, you had made things crystal clear: you didn’t have much experience on this territory. For a man his age, he was totally understanding. He knew you had your own times, that for him to take you to bed would take longer. Truth be told, Logan was willing to go to the ends of the world for you. There was no use in forcing anything.

At present, the bulge amid his legs becomes even more noticeable as you get off his lap, playing with his belt. “Can I?” you ask him, amazed at how straightforward you’re being.

Logan stares at you, so far panting, lust glowing in his eyes. “Shit, you’re gonna be the death of me,” he mutters as he helps you undress him. His worn out jeans end up pooling around his ankles, and you locate yourself in between his legs. 

You’re on your knees, hands folded in front of you. Suddenly, it hits you, the shame of it all. How badly you want him, how desperate you are to feel the weight of his cock on your tongue. How many nights you’ve dreamt of this moment, unable to stop that unbearable need of touching yourself every time you thought about pleasuring him.

That’s what you truly want. For him to use you.

“What’s wrong, princess? We’ve talked about this a lot of times. You know what to do,” you can’t help but stare at his crotch as you listen to him, and then he raises your chin with his finger, your lips parting unconsciously. You blink slowly at him, eyelashes fluttering together. At last, he seems to understand what you’re trying to tell him, and he raises his eyebrows, that cocky grin of his taking place where it belongs. “You want me to guide you, don’t you? Want me to tell you what to do? Know you like it when I go a bit off the rails.”

You moan at his words, squeezing your eyes shut and nuzzling your cheek up against his palm. Slick gathers in your panties as you push your thighs together. “Please. Tell me what to do.”

“Take it out,” he instructs you, and you do as you’re told. Grabbing him by the base, you pull his cock out of his briefs. He twitches in your hand, and he’s so, so incredibly big. 

You stroke him once, testing the feeling. This you know how to do. You’ve given him hand jobs millions of times, although this one feels particularly different from the others.

He takes hold of your fist, applying a bit of pressure. “I’m sorry, baby. I think you got it all wrong. I’m the one who makes the calls here, okay?” he grunts, his brows knitted, and you only nod, salivating at the sight of his cock already leaking precum at the tip. Logan licks his lips, curling his hand around yours. “You do as I say. Now, stroke me. Nice. And. Slow,” he punctuates each of his words by moving both your hand and his in unison around his length. “That’s it, darling. You just need someone to boss you around from time to time, ain’t I right?”

One thing to know about Logan: he’s so full of himself on a daily basis, but he just gets worse in bed.

“My mouth,” you hover your lips over the head of his cock, all shiny and soft. He has let you go, both of his arms now flexed behind his head, as if he were appreciating how pathetic you must look on your knees, begging for him to allow you to taste him. “Let me.”

“Not yet,” his hips follow your tormenting pace, seeking the warmth that your skin radiates. He grits his teeth, biting his lower lip. You’ve no idea how a man so strong can become putty in your hands like this. “Greedy girl. I’m beginning to think you’ve set me up. Only a slut would get so worked up about having a cock in her mouth. What happened to my innocent girl? Gone with the wind, huh?”

“Please, Lo. I need it so bad,” you are whining, peppering his thighs with kisses. You inhale his musky scent, getting dizzy. “Give it to me. I’ll be good.”

Out of nowhere, Logan grabs a handful of your hair, forcing you to arch your back. He scrutinizes your face, studying your blissed out demeanor. “I don’t doubt that. I’m sure you’ll be good. Otherwise, we’ll keep on trying. We have all night, and you have a good memory, just need to put it to use,” as he taps your lower lip with his tip, you catch him smirking. He repeats that same motion until he has you shivering from the excitement of being stuffed. ”Show me how much you need it. Go easy on it at first, okay? Don’t want you choking beforehand.”

You’re more than happy to comply.

Your tongue darts out to lick at his head, enveloping it between your lips. The salty taste of his precum invades your tastebuds, and you moan as you trace the veins of his cock with the pad of your thumb. “Tastes so good, Lo,” your voice sounds distant, almost unrecognizable to your own ears.

“I know, bub. Such a nice fucking mouth, can’t believe you’ve never done this before. I guess you’re a natural,” shaky fingers place a strand of hair behind your ears, patting your head as if you were a dog in heat. “Do you feel like bobbing your head a little?” he asks you, and you prepare yourself, attaching your mouth to his head once again. “Good. That’s good.”

With that being said, Logan fists your hair once again and shoves your face down, his hard cock tickling your throat. Your whines and his rapid breaths are the only sounds to be heard in your bedroom. He grins as he takes in the sight of you. “Oh, sweetheart. You look so beautiful with your mouth stretched around me,” his index finger taps your cheek and he feels the outline of his own cock. “You know I can smell you, right? You’re fucking soaked, baby. Think you’ll leave a stain on the carpet? You’d clean it off with your tongue, wouldn’t you?”

You have no idea how he’s coming up with these things, but you’re far from annoyed. In fact, you’ve never been this wet. Your underwear must be ruined at this point, and you wish Logan would tell you to touch yourself.

After some minutes of bobbing your head up and down, he pulls you off his cock and you breathe through your mouth for the first time in a while. As you gasp for air, Logan kisses you, tasting himself. He massages the back of your neck, his cock throbbing between the two of you. “You tired?”

Your glossy eyes widen. Shaking your head, you go for his balls this time, sucking one of them while toying with the other. Logan buries his hands in your hair for what must be the hundredth time in the night, unable to stop himself. “F-fuck, that’s it. A pretty girl like you just gets what she needs,” he praises you, and you return to his length, taking as many inches as you can without hurting yourself. Tears shimmer in your eyes, yet you can’t bring yourself to care about that detail. You’re far too focused on Logan’s grunts and growls. “Keep that up and I’ll come. You heard me? You’re gonna make me fucking come, bub.”

His words ignite a fire inside you. You use your hands, your mouth, everything that you have to pleasure him. He’s getting closer and closer, thighs shaking when you pay special attention to his tip. Logan responds to each of your movements, and as you feel every coherent thought fly out the window, you try to take him all the way down your throat, breathing through your nose and swallowing around him. He cants his hips up, brutally fucking your mouth. Like a dog without a leash, Logan seems to get lost in the warmth that envelopes his cock, chasing his own release. “You’re such a good girl. My good girl. Nobody will fuck this mouth ever again. I’ll ruin you for any pathetic guy that tries to get in your pants. You’re fucking mine, darling. Oh, f-fuck. Fuckfuckfuckfuck-”

You’re met with his happy trail once he spills his hot load inside your mouth. He keeps you trapped there, his cock twitching and spamming through the aftershocks of his orgasm. You don’t think twice and swallow what he’s giving you. Some of his cum slips from your lips, falling directly onto the carpet. Even Logan seems surprised when he doesn’t stop coming.

He helps you stand up after a moment, kissing you as soon as he gets the chance. He licks into your mouth, squeezing the flesh of your hips. Logan lifts his eyebrows, relishing how cock-drunk you must look. “I think you nearly killed me. And that’s a lot to say coming from someone who cannot fucking die.”

You plaster a smile on your face, hugging his wide frame. “So, was I okay?”

His jaw goes slack, and he lowers his head to capture your lips in another kiss. “You were fantastic. I could easily get hard again just from thinking about it,” his fingers trace the buttons of your shirt, tugging at the fabric of it. “What if you let me focus on yourself for a while? You’ve already done enough, baby. Let me take care of you,” he rubs his hands on your thighs, reaching for your drenched panties. “Perhaps we could try something else today. That pussy’s begging to be fucked.” 

dividers by: @/cafekitsune thank you!!! :)

[livingdeadmlm]

You Bring me Closer to God pt2

Pronouns: reader is referred to as a man

Physical Sex: AMAB

How far are things going?: no smut this chapter

Warnings: bit of shame, priest reader getting teased alot, everyone wants you!!

Outline: Kieran brings two friends for a morning meal, and unknown best to you each man quickly sets their eyes on you

What inspired me to write how I did: the crappy priest romance book I got lol

Other: Yes, I am making this a harem fic. Those were my favorite fics in 2016, but they fell off after a while, and I want them back!!!

The rhythmic clinking of pots and pans echoed through the quiet streets, almost rousing the entire town from its slumber as you threw yourself into the art of cooking. The early morning light filtered through the kitchen window, casting a warm glow on the countertop piled high with fresh ingredients. You needed the biscuit dough with fervor, the soft smell of sugar and flour in the air.

At that moment, the sizzling sounds of the bacon cooking combined with the gentle shaking of the oven rack as the biscuits baked provided a welcome distraction from the resurfacing memories of your dream that threatened to invade your mind. Each sizzle from the stovetop seemed to drown out the night's memories.

Because it was so early, most of the other people in the congregation hadn't shown up and wouldn't for two hours, so a confused expression painted your face as the heavy church doors opened and shut, light voices whispering.

Adjusting your cooking apron, you exited the kitchen and saw Kieran accompanied by two men. “Good morning, gentlemen!” you said, wiping your hands on the canvas apron before reaching out to the new man on the left. He spoke softly, “Mornin’, I’m Charles Smith.” he replied, his voice low, almost gravelly, the word slow and deliberate.

His handshake was firm—too firm. As you briefly touched, his hand enveloped yours with confidence. You felt the roughness of his palm and the deep scars on both hands, with one hand seeming to have a burn mark. But it was his eyes that stopped you. His gaze was intense, deep, and unwavering as if he could see right through you. The weight of it made your breath hitch, and you found yourself caught, unable to look away.

The other man stepped forward, his presence quieter but no less striking. “Buenos días, señor.” You noted the subtle scars on his fingers, signs of a hand that had seen its share of work, but the wounds seemed to look like cuts. But it was the softness of his touch that left you breathless. His hands were so unexpectedly tender, the softest hand you’d ever felt that wasn’t attached to a woman.

“Ah! Bue… nos dias! La comida. " You took a moment to pause and try to remember your Spanish classes from school. “Estará lista pronto.” His thumb brushed lightly over your knuckles, a small, unintentional gesture that felt like a jolt to your chest.

Sure, your Spanish was very slow to get out and slightly off, but he understood what you were trying to say. A smile graced his lips. “I speak English too, Father. It's very nice of you to try, though.” Your cheeks flushed in embarrassment, realizing the misstep, but it wasn’t just the mistake that left you flustered. It was the way his smile lingered, and his hand stayed a little longer in yours, “I’m Javier Escuella.”

“Well! Charles, Javier, and Kieran! Breakfast will be ready soon. I just put it in the oven. When it's done, you can grab it and go or join me at the kitchen table!” You spun on your heels, B-lining to the kitchen, nimble fingers toying with the crucifix around your neck that felt like it weighed a ton across your shoulders. Was this another test? Making you grapple with possible homosexuality and then throwing three very handsome men your way? How could God throw such temptation right in front of you?

You flipped the bacon in the pan: the golden-brown color and the sweet smell of biscuits filled the kitchen. Fresh eggs were on the counter, ready to be cooked in the bacon grease. The three men shuffled into the kitchen, sharing no words among themselves. You heard each of them pull out a chair and sit. You looked over your shoulder and smiled at each of them settling in.

“Living in a livestock town is great for fresh meat and eggs! Too bad it smells terrible out there,” you laughed, taking the bacon off the pan and gently shaking the extra fat before adding it to the pile you had already finished and putting that plate on the table.

“You men new to Valentine? I don’t think I’ve seen y’all around before!” You’d heard of new faces popping up around town from passing conversations you caught when there were church events. You pulled on a pair of oven mitts and glanced over at the men. Kieran’s gaze flickered briefly over your figure, his eyes lingering just a bit too long before he looked away.

Charles, always the quiet one, seemed distracted by the decor on the walls. His gaze skimmed over photos of past church members and the occasional framed painting. But Javier– Javier’s eyes were fixed on you. His intense stare followed every movement you made; you couldn’t determine his feelings. His dark eyes swirled with such an intensity.

“It’s just an extended stay,” Charles spoke, his voice steady, but you caught the subtle way his eyes strayed back to you, though he quickly masked it. “Yeah, we’re just passing through,” Javier’s raspy voice followed, rich and low, sending a jolt through you as you placed the hot pan in the center of the table. “Well, while you’re here, I’ll make sure you’re well-fed,” you offered with a smile. "No need to come to mass or anything." You turned to close the oven door, but as you did, you didn’t feel the weight of three pairs of eyes on you, each gaze landing right on your ass.

“I’d like to hear more about this town,” Javier said, his voice steady as he leaned forward, his eyes still fixed on you. "We don’t know much about it yet—other than the… livestock." He chuckled softly, and you couldn’t help but smile. People didn’t often visit the church outside of using the confessional booth on Sunday mornings or Wednesdays. “Well, there’s not much to it, really,” you said, facing him. "It’s small but rowdy. Just a week or so ago, there was this huge bar fight. I heard it over here.” Your voice held a worried tone as you recalled the yelling. You cracked two eggs into the skillet, and the oil popped slightly.

“Drinking is a strong vice; it makes people lose sense. But being down the road from it is not the worst. I like to think it's peaceful in the church.” You flipped the eggs, adding two more to the pan. Grabbing a plate, sprinkling salt and pepper, you placed the two cooked eggs on it. You put the first plate in front of Kieran. “Thank you for the food, Father (name)!” Kieran quickly dug in as Charles's plate was placed before him. Javier's plate promptly followed. Charles took a biscuit and made a small sandwich with egg and bacon. “Oh! That's very smart, Charles. You are a wise man!” You made your small sandwich, a grin across your face.

“You cook like this often?” Charles asked, taking a bite from his sandwich. You stiffened slightly, worried if everything had tasted bad or was overcooked. “Every day, I do breakfast and dinner; I hope you’re asking to come by more often and not because it's foul?” you laughed, trying to make light of it, but your smile faltered slightly. Your stomach is already twisted in ways you couldn’t explain, but to add the layer that your food was bad? Your stomach felt tight. “No, Father (Name), it's perfectly fine, very good food."

Javier leaned back in his chair, his eyes never leaving yours. “You’d make a good wife. Why aren’t you married?” he said, toned low and teasing. His voice was undeniably warm, and it made your skin flush. Javier shifted in his seat, his knee brushing against yours just slightly. The contact was subtle, but it sent a warmth flooding through you, making your breath hitch momentarily. You forced yourself to focus on the biscuit sandwich in your hand.

“Other than the fact that I am a man?” you said, trying to maintain your composure, though your voice trembled slightly. “I was young when I vowed chastity. I never was much into relationships. My relationship with God and friends has always taken up that space… at least, I like to think so.” You laughed weakly, hoping the words lighten enough to mask your uncertainty.

“You can’t miss what you’ve never had,” you said, trying to deflect, hoping to ease the weight of the question that had made your chest tighten. Each man’s mind seemed to race, caught somewhere between curiosity and something more, something deeper that you couldn’t quite name. “Never?” Charles chimed in, his voice a touch incredulous. He leaned forward slightly, his elbows resting on the table as he studied you. “Like never at all? Never a fling or a kiss?" You swallowed, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks as you finished the last bite of your biscuit sandwich, using the moment to avoid the pressure of their eyes on you. You wiped your mouth with a napkin, trying to act casual, but you could feel your pulse quicken, the room shrinking around you.

“Nope, Mister Smith,” you said with a playful edge, trying to lighten the mood, though you could hear your voice tremor. “I didn’t have a rebellious phase or anything.” Kieran, quietly observing the exchange, finally spoke up, his voice gentle: “You’re quite a good-looking man. Have girls never fallen over themselves for you?” Laughing, you shook your head. “Nope, my brothers always got those confessions in our neighborhood. I focused on playing and getting better at games to beat them.” Each man chuckled, finishing up his meal.

“You’re a strong man, Father (Name). If I had your looks, I’d be a friend of every lady.” Kieran had a big grin across his face, eating some leftover bacon. Charles stood and took everyone's plate, placing each in the sink before washing them. “Oh, Mister Smith! You don’t have to! Please, you are a guest.” You stood holding out your hand, and he softly brushed away. “You took the time to make food for those in need; the least we can do is wash the dishes, especially because we’ll return for dinner."

You felt a pair of hands pull you backward from your hips, “Well, don’t make us all look bad, Charles; we will help too, Father. You go sit down and rest.” Your skin continued to burn as Javier's hands lingered, “Well, if you men insist, I will find chores elsewhere; please let me know when you plan to head out! Dinner is at 7; bring any other friends you may have!”

You shuffled out of the kitchen, giving Kieran a smile as your mind went into a panic. You would take this time to wash your sheet and maybe have a dip in the nearby river, as the cool water would help you calm down a bit before they come back later.

[cannibal-witchh]

Broken Tea Cup

Written by cannibal_witchh

Contains: Alcohol, smoking, language, mental disorders, self harm, sex

Notes: Sorry, I have been infamously MIA as usual. I've been having a bad depression spell then I got hooked on playing SH2R and fell in love with this take of James. Because I've been down in the dumps I wanted to write on the perspective of being the one to love someone who is feeling sadness. Someone who battles with depression and guilt yet the reader will comfort and still see beauty in. It's always been a want of mine to expierence that kind of comfort when I have my depression spells. This does happen after Mary's death so just a heads up. Also, I haven't wrote in so damn long that it might show in my writing I'm pretty scattered brain. Thanks for checking out my story!

James. That name, that awful name. A name that drew from her chapped pale lips during her final moments. That name, which was accompanied with a desperate plea. A weak collapsing beg that was extinguished under goose down. James. That name drifted in the corridors of his dissociation, and reeled him back to reality.

"W-what?", James stuttered realizing he had another dissociative episode. Your eyes drew down to his hands, another cigarette was laced between his pointer and middle finger. His eyes followed your's, and shame spread across his face. " Y/N, I'm sorry...", his eyes darted to the ground, and he crouched down to extinguish the cigarette. " I'm having a really bad spell, Y/N. I'm so sorry...", his eyes grew glossy, you could see pink pooling under the skin of his nose, and his voice grew nasally. "James, please.", your hands reached out to cup his face. " You aren't a bad person. You are human. You may not have had the right to make the decision you did...but,", you were interrupted with a sniffle from James. His eyes shut tight, as tears began to run down his cheeks, and his hands met your's. You felt him tremble, his hands were shaking, tarnished with the scent of tobacco and callouses. " But, baby...thats your weight to bear. And everyday you punish yourself for it because you are sorry. This eats at you so much that you forget to live each day while you can. You aren't a bad person James. Give yourself some kindness.", you comforted him, bringing your forehead to press against his. His hair was matted together from anxiety sweat, and his eyes continued to remain closed. He refused to look at you. He was afraid he'd look back up to see her. See her in her frail and brittle state. How could he move on? While she was dead. Murdered. Move in with a healthy, warm, and lively woman. While his late wife was buried in the ground with her lasts memories being her worst. Move in with a woman, who possibly could bare children, dance, drink, make love, and who could give him comfort. Something she was unable to give him. He felt so wrong. How could he? All those memories were still there, yet he lives a new life as if none of it ever happened.

" I didn't show her kindness..."

" Love, please, you need to understand. There were so many emotions, and so much pain. I know you will never let this go but understand...she's no longer hurting. ", you couldn't pull anymore words together. Nothing would persuade him to move forward. He didn't feel a glimmer of comfort from those words. She's no longer suffering. That reverberated in his mind.

He let out a cough from all the weeping. His face reddened with grief and torment. " Let's go inside. It's about to rain.", you lightly held his hands and guided him into the house. His hands were clammy, skin stuck to your's. It didn't bother you, however, you didn't plan to release his hands from your's. " Sit.", you commanded as he sat on the edge of the bed still holding your hands tightly.

" I will never be her. I accept that. I don't punish you for still feeling the way you do for her. Things were complicated and difficult. You two had a life together. But James...I adore you. I want to be there for you until you are tired of me. Don't burden yourself with all these emotions. Let me take on some.", you felt his hands twitch, he seemed as though panic had spread all over his body. He finally looked up at you, sad glistened red rimmed eyes, and dried tears. " Ok.", was all he mustered in his response. His awkwardness still lingered even in his state of mind. He was never gifted with words. You knew this though. His actions showed his appreciation for you, not his words.

" I don't deserve another chance...another shot at having someone in my life like you.", he began fidgeting with your fingers. His eyes laying into your's. You could see all his brokenness. Every chip and crack inside him. All the hurt and ache bleeding through. He was a deeply broken man, and yet, you couldn't deny your adoration for him. " I wish I could promise you a wonderful life. But you...you've given me what I haven't given you. Unconditional love.", he felt so much guilt suffocating him, his heart racing with the weight of regret. Clawing at his ribs ready to burst, all the build up of hurt clinging under the shell of James. "James. I know you care for me. You've done alot for me. Please stop comparing how you and I love differently. I promise you, your presence and love is something I'm so thankful for. I only ask that you can eventually provide yourself that level of kindness.", you knew from behind his blue eyes that would never happen. His eyes clearly read there was no chance even a quarter of him could give himself love like what he scrapped along to give you.

His face looked defeated, he was staring at the ground, uncertain where his eyes should even rest. His hands still continuing to figet with your fingers. His leg bouncing up in down, slightly rattling the mattress " Y/N...can I please...touch you?", he awkwardly asked, his eyes tracing from the ground to your body to your eyes. He had always been touch starved. He would fall apart with hugs, kisses, and he'd lose himself intertwined under the sheets with you. You were lost at his question, he must've wanted to stop the conversation. It was traveling in a small circle. Be kind to yourself. Mary is no longer suffering. I can't forgive myself. I can't let go. You deserve better. All empty words and suggestions given at an already exhausted battle.

"Are you sure, we should?", you asked with surprise across your face. You didn't want to feel temptation drawing at your heart, but you couldn't deny...grief did bring people to want sex. The emotions with every thrust, every gasp, and every motion...it felt so genuine. Like the intimate acts the two of you indulged in was healing. Like he understood, he is allowed to feel pleasure. To be loved and held under such vulnerability. That even under such grim spells, he was still desired and loved in your eyes.

"I would like to...but only if you...", he continued his awkward mumbling. His eyes trailing away, trying to be discipline. and not draw his eyes to your night gown. The way it hung off your shoulders, scooping down to reveal so much chest, thin enough to show peaks forming when the temperature was low, short enough that it barely reached past your upper thigh, and barely giving modesty to your lace panties.

"Touch me.", you gave an approving look that sent him breaking from his refrains of exploring you. Your doe eyes gazing at him, exhausted from the tiring battle of begging James to allow kindness to himself. Maybe your body meeting with his would allow him this.

He let out a quiet mhm, and reached for your face with both large slender hands. He cupped both sides and led you towards his face. You saw his blonde eyelashes cover his sad blue eyes, before you closed your own eyes. A gentle kiss was exchanged. You heard him let out a low gasp. He brought one of his hands to the small of your back, bringing you into his lap. You could feel heat pressing against his jeans. A quick glance down, and you spotted small wet stain appeared beside his zipper. He was so easily excited, it didn't take long for him to leak desire.

He continued to kiss you, gently he nipped at your lower lip, and invited his tongue in your mouth. One of his hands reached to squeeze your thigh, his thumb rubbed circles along your soft skin. " God. I want you, Y/N.", apology could be heard in his voice, but also sincerity too. He did want you. He did find beauty in you. " Then show me.", you commanded as you guide your hands under his shirt to touch his bare chest. His heart raced, practically ready to burst from how fast it was pumping. He broke the kisses, his eyes half lidded gazing back at you. He brought both arms to hug you tightly, his nose pressed against the top your shoulder. His stubble tickled your skin. " Please lay down."

You obliged and fell slowly onto your back. James pulled his shirt over his shoulders, his body was lovely. It was realistic. Not some chiseled ab model. He had body hair littered from his chest to his lower abdomin. By no means had much toned mass, he had a bit of a lower stomach from drinking but he wasn't overweight. Just human. The heart breaking part of every time you witnessed James undress was what you saw on his arms. Deep scars. He used to self harm. He never liked visiting that topic but he would never deny that was a bad method of coping in his earlier years of grief.

You tried not to focus on that small detail of him. He was alive, that was a reminder of it. He unfastened his belt and let his jeans drop down to his ankles. He stepped out of them to crawl between your legs. You caught a glimpse of a very fevered erection. Reddened and dripping with lust. Or was it love? Maybe both. He hooked his fingers into your panties sliding them off you. " Please take off your top. I want to see all of you while I taste you.", his mouth was so close to it. His head so deep between your thighs, it was almost an art. You obeyed, your top flew across the room, until a gentle clash of fabric met the wooden floor. " Good girl."

He brought his lips to kiss your inner ones. His tongue traced the edge of your slit. Lightly it followed up and down until he started to softly tug on your labia with his teeth. He nudged your hips to lift a little more so he could savor your deeper. You followed, legs widened apart and your back arching up. Saliva ran down his chin, glistening his stubble in the dim light. He started to delicately suck on your labia and intermittently tease your entrance. Alternating between sucking and quickly lapping at your hole.

You couldn't resist a release of moans, your stomach rising and falling from your breaths increasing. You saw James occasionally glance to meet your eyes. It was like witnessing a starving creature consuming you without limitations. He moved his mouth to suck on your pussy, then tracing his tongue down to wriggle his tongue inside you. You felt your hips buckle, and your hands reached to grasp his soft blonde hair. You tugged it gently to get out a small groan from him. You felt his breath brush against your sensitive body. His tongue continued to press into you, his nose lightly rested on a patch of your pubic hair. James loved your natural side, if you missed shaving he couldn't possibly care. It was an opportunity to smell more of your natural musk. He felt more compelled to taste your pussy knowing he could smell your soft hair. Something about that interaction made him wild.

"Your a good boy, James.", you praised him. You saw him lift his face a bit with starry eyes. James had always been the more submissive one. The praise had always been a kink for him. " More, please.", he politely begged. His tongue dragged to your clit, circling it, and bringing himself to suckle it. " Sweet boy, you know how to please me so well. You are such a good boy.", it was hard to think clearly, with him roaming his tongue along your aroused body. " Am I really a good boy, momma?", he pushed himself up, until he hovered over you. His shoulders tensing from lifting up, his body towering over yours as he brought a hand to guide his dick into you. He brushed it along your slit, kissing your clit before he slid the head in. He was teasing you. "Yes, sweet boy, now go on, touch me as deep as you can.", you impatiently moaned, the rest of him slipped in. Both of you let out a loud gasp, your eyes both met. He brought his hands to lace with yours. " God, you're so beautiful.", his eyes watery with emotion.

"I could never stop fantasizing about you.", he was thursting relatively slow, just savoring you wrapped around him. It was a flustered feeling of craving him to go faster.

" Every day, I just think....uh...fuck..I think of how you're handcrafted for me. Your body sculpted to perfection."

" Aw, my sweet James.", your eyes grew emotional with his. Were you two making love? Was this no longer fucking?

"You're captivating. Every moan.", he thrusted deep.

" Every cry.", the thrust grew deep and you exchanged a yelp in return.

" Every time you shout my name.", he crashed his lips into your's forcing his tongue in. A guttural sound of satisfaction parting from his lips.

" Fuck. I can't take it.", you saw him tense, his eyes tightly shut. Hands gripping your's, nails practically digging into your skin. " Say your all mine."

" James. I'm all your's."

" Say you will have my children."

" I want to carry your babies."

A loud moan slipped from him, his thrusts were faster, the mattress creaked with each motion. You could feel his cock growing very hot as it stretched you apart.

" Can I...can I get you pregnant...now?", there was the awkward James. A few seconds of a dominant side came out and now it was back to the sweet shy man you knew.

You shot your eyes at his. He seemed as though he regretted the request, as if it was a slip of the tongue.

" You would be amazing dad, baby.", you gave a gentle smile. His eyes squinting as a smile formed across his face.

His thrusts were intense for several minutes before he grew sloppy. He brought his hands to slip under you body to bring you against his chest. He hugged you tightly as his pace became slower and drawn out. " I love you."

" I love you too, darling. It's ok, get me pregnant."

A desperate gasp slipped again, until it was followed with a hitch. His body tensed as you felt hot ropes deposit in you.

"Oh my god...I'm so sorry.", he panicked. His self worth reflecting back in his eyes. " James. James. James. Calm down. I want this. ", you grinned, pink dusted along your cheek and chest.

" You really want this?"

" I mean...its kinda a bit late. You already finished in me..."

"Oh....yeah...I guess that's...ermm..yeah. sorry."

" James...be quiet ok."

" Did you...cum?"

You let out a soft giggle and shook your head.

" Shit...I'm so selfish...I- I"

" We can go for another round in a bit, baby. Let's go grab some food."

" Oh...you want to go again?"

You nodded and rolled your eyes.

" Is this what you call pillow talk or after care?"

" Please don't say pillow talk."

Oh...yikes.

[eyelessfaces]

𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐓𝐎𝐁𝐄𝐑: 𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘 𝐒𝐈𝐗

𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐓𝐎𝐁𝐄𝐑 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

llewyn davis x reader

𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐤: face sitting

warnings: piv sex, obvious face sitting, oral (f receiving)

word count: 1.4k

updates blog: @eyelessupdates

(a/n; there's a part inspired by this post, hi @my-secret-shame <3)

Today was one of those days. Not especially a tiring one, but a long one, one that seemed to drag out forever, that felt like was never gonna end. 

You had understood this the second Llewyn joined you at your table at the Gaslight. 

He didn’t tell you much; didn’t need to. He had an expressive face, but you liked the idea that you had somehow come to know it all by just looking at his eyes.

He had quietly settled beside you, capturing your lips in a kiss before lighting himself a cigarette and watching the act in front of him until the time would come for him to play. 

The day only seemed to get painfully longer as he got on stage, having to witness Pappi taking advantage of the situation to hit on you despite knowing damn well that Llewyn was your boyfriend; he would punch him in the face if Pappi wasn’t the one to let him play at the Gaslight, if he wasn’t contributing to the rare occasions for him to make some money.

The moment you got home is the moment you truly realized how done he was, how exhausting carrying the weight of his day over his shoulders had been.

You watched as he hastily and messily kicked off his shoes, throwing his coat over the nearest surface, and you followed closely as he quickly beelined to the bedroom to then sprawl onto your bed, tapping his lap to invite you to straddle him. 

So you did, knees as either side of him, his hands gently rubbing up and down your thighs as he told you about his never ending day.

It was endearing, the way he was looking up at you and smiling lovingly, as if it was the only thing he still had the strength for. You ran your hand through his hair as you listened to him talk, your fingers grasping his chin to kiss him once he was done.

Both of his hands grabbed the back of your neck to bring you closer and deepen the kiss, shifting to roam down your body once his tongue slipped inside your mouth. 

His fingers toyed and fiddled with the waistband of your trousers, and it didn’t take long for you to decide to remedy that, stripping out of your clothes as he mirrored your actions, sighing as you eventually lowered yourself down onto his cock while he lit a cigarette.

There is something so deeply arousing about this, about him nonchalantly smoking his cigarette while you are riding him.

It is a slow pace, almost lazy; a focused frown has grown over Llewyn’s face, cigarette tucked between his lips, one hand settled at your hips, guiding you up and down, his other hand trapping the stick between his fingers, momentarily pulling it away from his mouth to mindlessly blow the smoke to the side, eventually putting it out once it is done consuming. 

You lean to kiss him now that his mouth is accessible, his tongue mingling with yours, the familiar taste of nicotine in his warm breath.

His hand sets at your cheek while you kiss, shifting to tangle in your hair, setting over your waist when you pull away once it becomes necessary.

“Stop riding me” his voice is sudden, a bit rough, and you oblige. You stop, immediately interrupt the rolling of your hips, afraid something is wrong, but his thumb is gently rubbing circles over your skin so you’re even more confused. 

“I wanna try something” he declares as he shifts to adjust his position, tucking the pillow comfortably under his head. 

Your curiosity is piqued, you’re always eager to try new things with him. You raise an eyebrow and your mouth starts to gape to ask for what he has in mind, but he speaks before you get the chance to.

“Ride my face” he suggests as his hands settle back to your hips, and he feels you clench around him as he pronounces the words.

Oh.

You had experience in riding him, but not that way.

Llewyn had also eaten you out plenty of times before, but always in ways where he could control what he was doing, and where there were no actual risks for you to harm him.

“Are you sure? I don’t wanna hurt you” you mutter just loud enough for him to hear, your hand coming to wrap around his forearm.

“Dove, if I suffocate in your pussy I’ll be the happiest man on earth.” he jokes, a playful, reassuring smile over his face as he squeezes your sides, a laugh slipping from your mouth. “You’re not gonna hurt me angel” 

You nod, the simultaneous feelings of apprehension and excitement pooling in your belly.

You lift a leg up to lift yourself up from his cock, a small whine leaving your mouth at the loss, shifting to then crawl and place yourself so you could straddle his chest.

“You’re sure about this?” you ask, looking down at him.

“A hundred percent. C'mon, get that pretty thing over my face"

You get yourself onto your knees, either of them caging his face, and he licks his lips as he takes in the sight above him, staring at the slick starting to drip down onto the insides of your thighs.

“If something’s wrong, slap my thigh real hard” you suggest. 

He scoffs, gripping onto your hips. “Sure thing, c’mon baby.”

You bite down onto your bottom lip, cautiously lowering yourself down onto his face, holding tight onto the headboard of the bed, careful not to put your whole weight down on him.

You can’t help the moan that slips from your lips; the first contact of his tongue over your folds feels heavenly, and a small gasp quickly follows when he pulls down onto your hips to bring you closer to his face, almost smothering himself in you.

“Shit, Llewyn” you keen, your head dropping as you bite down onto your lip.

His hand quickly comes to fist his cock, missing the feeling of your tight cunt around it though really, the taste of it and your sounds alone could work him to an orgasm.

Words can barely escape from your mouth, you're only able to deliver parts of them when he’s mouthing at your cunt like a starved man, licking into you like it was the last time he was ever going to.

“O-ooh yeah– just like that” you whine as the abrasive feeling of his beard against your sensitive skin brings an extra sensation, starting to really roll your hips onto his face, truly fucking yourself on his tongue, way less cautious about your movements now that pleasure has taken over your other senses.

“Baby, I’m close,” you breathe out after some time, – quicker than usual, frankly – struggling to get the words out between moans, the task so challenging when his nose starts rubbing against your clit.

He hums into you in response, the hand at your hip squeezing harder onto your flesh, the hand at his cock pumping it more firmly to make sure you would both cum at the same time.

Your eyes squeeze tight, nails almost digging in the wooden headboard when the feeling grows inside of you and makes your mouth fall agape, a long, broken, noise-complaint-worthy moan escaping as you cum over his tongue.

Llewyn’s low, deep grunt resonates against your sensitive pussy as he fists his cock and pulses into his own hand, the vibrations of the moans and grunts leaving his mouth prolonging your climax as you come together.

You climb off of him once it’s over for the both of you, placing yourself beside him, still standing onto your numb, shaking knees, your forehead resting against the brim of the headboard while you try to catch your breath and regulate the beating of your heart. 

“Good?” he asks, and you can hear the slight rasp in his voice after being deprived of air for some time.

“Are you kidding me” you chuckle, breathless. “That mouth of yours has other talents than just singing.” you turn and really sit on the bed, giving your quivering legs a rest.

You look down at him as he chuckles, his mouth and bearded chin glistening with your juices, the sight making your stomach turn in the best way possible.

Then it hits you, the delayed worry, the possibility that it might have not been enjoyable for him, or maybe even uncomfortable.

“Was it alright for you? Did I hurt you?”

“Did you feel me slap your thigh real hard?”

—

inside llewyn davis taglist: @apollo-enthusiast @scarabgrant @lockleysgrl @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @missmarmaladeth @alexxavicry @mystinky-butt @anightshift @campingwiththecharmings @dameronshandholder @spider-starry @spxctorsslxt

+ @flightlessangelwings

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

I have a prompt request, Lucifer realizes that Adam always wore a mask and robes that covered his entire body because he was self conscious over his looks. At first Lucifer thinks that this was caused by shame after eating the Forbidden Fruit only to find out that Adam was self conscious about his looks before that because Lilith was constantly calling him ugly. So Lucifer decides to make it his mission to help Adam feel better about himself by talking about how handsome he thinks he is. Just some Adam angst with Lucifer being the best boyfriend.

Adam did his best to avoid mirrors when he fell to Hell. He still wore his robes that covered him from head to toe but he felt naked without his mask to cover his face. As hard as he tried to keep up this air of being the hottest thing that Hell had the pleasure of viewing, on the inside he felt anything but that.

It had to be true right? Lilith told him all the time in the garden how ugly he was and that she didn't want her future children to turn out ugly like him.

Chicks in heaven wanted him, but he kept his mask on and they never seemed bothered by it, some preferred it. That only confirmed to him what he already knew.

So now as a sinner and no mask to hide his face, all Adam can do is put up a metaphorical mask. Fake it til you make type deal.

He's been faking it for a long time.....

It wasn't until after they started dating did Lucifer take notice of Adams behavior around his appearance. He never wore anything from fitting, even if Adam didn't wear his robes he'd wear clothes that were loose and hid his shape and covered nearly all of his skin.

At first he thought it was because of the apple, finding out what it means to be naked around people can have that effect.

But no, it wasn't until he noticed how Adam avoided mirrors, would only take pictures of himself if he could heavily filter them or even during sex he wouldn't face Lucifer. And when he did his eyes were closed, like he was keeping something out or the lights would be off and they would be in total darkness.

Adam had let it slip one day what Lilith had said to him all those years ago in the garden.

One night, when in bed just reading he notices that Adam had been particularly quiet that whole day. Adam was laying with his back to Lucifer. "You okay, Hun?"

Adam didn't move or reply. He wasn't asleep, he was just staring at the wall. The blanket was pulled up to his nose.

Lucifer came up behind him and held him, carding his fingers through silky smooth wing feathers. Adam shivered from the feeling. "What's cooking good looking?" He smiled when that got a snort out of Adam and a half smile. "Seriously, what's wrong?"

Adam still didn't answer. He just tucked himself in tighter.

"Adam, look at me." Slowly he got Adam to turn over to face him, but he wasn't looking at Lucifer. "Let's see those pretty eyes." Slowly, Adam lifted his eyes to look at Lucifer, they were glassy. "There you are. Now, let's move this." Lucifer nudged the blanket down until Adam's face was free of it. "There's my handsome man." He kissed Adams face.

Adam started laughing when Lucifer kissed his face all over. "Luci!" He moaned softly when his King captured his lips in a soft yet firm kiss.

"I love every inch of you. You are the most gorgeous person I have ever had the pleasure to be with." Lucifer got on top of Adam and cupped his face. "You don't have to hide from me. I want to see your beautiful golden eyes, your heart stopping smile, and your smoking hot body." Yeah Adam gained weight over the years but that was from his own depression and eating his feelings from what Lilith said. Lucifer loved his softer body, more to love!

Adam cast his eyes down, frowning. "No it's not."

Lucifer raised a brow at him. "You question your King's judgement?"

"Yeah, I think my King needs some fucking glasses."

Lucifer smikred, "My vision is just fine. Cause I see a perfect ten." He winked and laughed when Adam rolled his eyes.

"Will you stop?" Adam was smiling now, he squeaked when Lucifer started up again on kissing his face and lips again.

"Never my love. I'll never stop loving you for who you are. And who are you is perfect to me.~"

[1004tyun-archive]

❥ i love you. i want us both to eat well

✶ pairing: idol!taehyun x non idol! chubby reader

✶ summary: taehyun's coming to stay with you for the week and you feel it's time for a big change. but you don't realize it's an unneeded change until it's too late

✶ genres: angst, hurt/comfort with lots of smut at the end (as a treat!)

✶ warnings: reader has a bad relationship with food, intrusive thoughts, bulimia, negative self talk, brief mention of vomiting, mentions of weight, eating disorders, negative body image, praise kink, squirting, edging, face sitting, unprotected sex

✶ word count: 4.7k words

✶ a/n: i've noticed a general lack of chubby reader fics so i thought i'd do my part and write a hurt/comfort fic involving tyun ^_^ this was very comforting for me to write personally, but if any of the aforementioned warnings are triggering to you in any way, i don't recommend reading. i don't want any of you to get hurt or apply the very harmful things the reader does in this fic to your lives.

this fic is NOT endorsing disordered eating. i do not endorse nor support thinspo, body shaming, eating disorders, or hating your body, no matter your size. as a plus size person myself, i think it's important to love your body as it is and i hope this fic provides solace and comfort to those who have a bad relationship with food or their bodies. you're beautiful the way you are and i hope you're able to love your body the way taehyun loves your body in this fic <3

love you lots 🫶🏾 if you need anyone to talk to about this subject matter, my inbox and messages are always open x

It's a slow work day; slow, boring, and tedious.

And you're starving.

You forgot to bring your lunch with you so your measly meal of a granola bar and black coffee was nothing to write home about. You can't wait to get home and eat some real food while facetiming your lovely boyfriend.

On the way to your apartment complex, you see a gift shop with a TV playing compilations of idol dance challenges from Tiktok from the display window. You decided to stop and watch for a bit once you recognized one of the Taehyun's fellow group members. Sure enough, the next video that plays is one with Taehyun in it.

Oh, he looks so good. He's doing some kind of girl group dance with a couple of the group's members. The girls are dressed so cutely with perfectly manicured hair and nails and makeup. There's a voice in the back of your head that's saying things you don't want to hear, so you ignore it.

But with every step closer to your apartment, the voice grows louder and louder.

They look so much better with him than you ever could.

They're prettier and skinnier than you. You don't think you actually deserve him, do you?

He's probably cheating on you with one of those girls. Who could blame him? He's too good for you, you both know that.

There's a bad taste in your mouth by the time you get to your front door. Despite your brain doing everything it can to ruin your day, you decide to rummage through the fridge for some food anyway.

You're pretty good at keeping the fridge stocked when Taehyun isn't around, but as soon as you start assessing your options, your appetite starts to wane. You think back to those gorgeous female idols you saw on television, with their glamorous bodies.

Slender waists, rounded hips, lithe arms and legs, dainty hands, and long, silky hair.

You don’t look like that, you know you don’t.

But maybe you could if you tried a little harder.

Your phone ringing snaps you out of your spiraling thoughts. Seeing Taehyun on your phone screen immediately eases your pain.

"I saw you on TV today," you say.

"Oh yeah? Was I cool?"

"You were the coolest," you say with a smile.

"Did you eat?" he asks and your throat goes dry.

"Yeah, I went out to get something before I got home. Did you?"

"Mhm, I just got done eating dinner."

Taehyun looks a little antsy, like he wants to say something so you call him out on it.

"Everything okay?" you ask.

"Yeah, it's- Okay, I wanted to surprise you, but I can't keep it in. I finally have a break in my schedule so I'll be home all week starting next Sunday,"

"What? Baby, that's great news! I can't wait to finally see you. It's been too long! I mean, I know it's only been a week since we saw each other, but still!"

By the time you hang up, your heart is soaring. You get to stay with your boyfriend for a whole week! What sounds basic to some sounds like paradise to others, truly. The life of dating an idol is a very different world, to say the least.

You looked down at your stomach and frowned as you squeezed its flesh. You've put on some stress weight, no doubt about it. What would Taehyun think? Yes, you were chubby when he first met you and you're chubby now, but there's no doubt he would notice the weight you've put on recently.

He's going to be home in less than a week. What if he realizes he deserves better and he's been settling for you this whole time? Taehyun is a celebrity, he could have anyone he wants. So why you, of all people? You both know he could never go public with his relationship with you for privacy reasons, but maybe it wasn't just that.

Maybe he was ashamed to be seen with you.

As you go to bed later that night with an empty stomach, you recognize that something has to change.

So when the next morning comes, you decide to start with eating less and walking to work instead of taking public transit. You learned to appreciate the four mile walk there and back every day to appreciate the morning dew and the passing scenery as you listened to your favorite songs.

But it wasn’t enough. You weren’t losing weight quickly enough and the ideal version of yourself who lived in your head wasn’t matching your reflection in the mirror.

So you start going running every day after work. You run a couple of laps on the track at the community center near your workplace. You feel energized after working out so much, but damn, you're hungry. No matter how much your stomach growls, you wave off the voice telling you to eat and drink some cold water to satiate your hunger instead.

The next thing you know, it's D-Day. Taehyun is coming home tonight and you can't wait. You don't work weekends, but you keep up with your routine regardless. You walk to your workplace and then run your several laps around the track until you've sufficiently tired yourself out.

By the time you get home, you're able to shower, clean the apartment, and relax for a few hours.

You're watching a program about weight loss on your laptop when you get a call from Taehyun and immediately pick up.

“Me and the guys were thinking about getting dinner tonight. Wanna come?”

You're glad he can't see the discomfort on your face.

“No thanks, I’m swamped with work tonight.”

“Are you sure? We’re going to your favorite chicken place.”

“I’m sure, love. Thanks.”

“Okay, let me know if you want anything.”

It hurt a part of your soul to decline going to your favorite restaurant. You swear the savory, sweet and spicy crunch of that hot honey fried chicken had healing properties. But you have bigger things to worry about. You need to stay focused.

You fall asleep on the couch and startle awake when you hear the front door of your apartment clicking open.

“I’m home,” Taehyun calls from the entryway. His voice is followed by the sound of rustling plastic bags. You slide your laptop off your lap and give your boyfriend a quick kiss on the lips.

“Welcome home,” you say, then take a look at the plastic bags Taehyun is carrying in each hand. “What’s all this?”

“Some extras from dinner. I brought some stuff back for you, too.”

Your stomach twists. “Oh, honey you didn’t need to do that.”

“I never believe you when you don’t ask for anything,” he says with a laugh. “Anything you don’t finish you can take to work tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” you smile but you feel like you’re dying inside. Why does he have to be so considerate? As nice as the gesture is, you’re not eating a single bit. You swear to yourself that you won’t.

As delicious as that food looks and smells, successfully resisting temptation feels better than that food could ever taste.

You brush off the gurgling of your stomach as you go through your nighttime ablutions.

It’s 4:00 AM when your cravings become too strong to ignore. The growling of your stomach grows louder, unbearably so.

You turn your head to check on Taehyun, he’s still fast sleep. Maybe this was the perfect time to do what you wanted to do.

You sneak off to the kitchen, grab the cold paper boxes of food and arrange them on your small dining table. Smelling and looking at the food isn’t the same as eating it, you tell yourself. There’s nothing wrong with smelling or observing the food, as long as you don’t eat it.

This should be easy…

Shouldn't it?

You black out hours later and the first thing you’re faced with is a multitude of empty takeout boxes. Two boxes of fried chicken, a box of garlic fries, steamed rice, and two apple mango hand pies. Foods that are usually your favorites yet all you could do was panic.

You start hyperventilating and your vision blurs as you stumble to the bathroom and kneel in front of the toilet, shoving your index finger down your throat and trying your hardest to remove any of the food you ate. After reaching deep enough, you gag around your finger and vomit, bile stinging your throat and tears filling your eyes. You empty your stomach and vomit until nothing but stomach acid comes up, the metallic taste coating your mouth.

"Y/N?" Taehyun asks from behind the door. "Are you okay?"

A string of drool hangs from your bottom lip and you've never felt more repulsed by yourself until now.

"I'm fine, just a little sick."

"I'm coming in—"

"—No! No, I'm okay. Don't worry about me."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm fine, honey, really. I'll see you later tonight, okay?"

"Okay, see you tonight." You can hear the doubt in his voice. It pains you to lie to him like this, but you know this would upset him. You gather enough strength to drag yourself up from the bathroom floor and start getting ready for work.

That was a close call. There's no way you can let that happen again. The binging, the vomiting, having Taehyun worry about you, any of it. If you were planning on continuing this, you had to be discrete about it, even if it meant lying to your boyfriend's face.

So you decide to stop eating altogether.

And at first, you feel fine.

You're able to get through the work day by chewing gum or drinking cold water to keep yourself awake. When Taehyun comes home with food or cooks for the both of you, you lie and say you already ate at work or you're not hungry.

And you know Taehyun senses that something is wrong, but you can't tell him. You could never tell him.

This wasn't going the way you expected it to.

You wanted to enjoy coming home from work and have Taehyun play your househusband for the week, but by the time you get home every night, you're so exhausted. You fall asleep on the couch, sometimes even mid conversation, and you wake up hours later with a pounding headache and a blanket thrown over you, courtesy of your sweet boyfriend.

And by the end of the week, you hardly have the energy to even stand up in the shower.

"Have a good day at work today," Taehyun says and gives you a kiss on the forehead at the door. That on its own gives you enough energy to make it through today.

You cross the crowded street, feeling normal, albeit a bit tired.

And then, out of nowhere, you feel like someone pulled the plug on you.

The next thing you see is the blurry ceiling of a hospital room, nothing but beige and speckles. You gasp like you’ve just come up for air and look around. You're connected to an IV and a heart rate monitor and, out of the corner of your eyes, you see...

"Y/N!"

Taehyun rushes to your side, taking your hand in his. Your heart is pounding when you see him. He looks so worried. He must've been so afraid for you.

"Y/N, why? Why didn't you tell me something was wrong? Why'd you do this to yourself?" he asks, standing tears in his eyes. Your heart sinks. There's no way he doesn't know how you got here.

This wasn’t supposed to happen.

He wasn't supposed to find out.

You were supposed to silently starve yourself until you became beautiful. Not worry him like this.

You failed. Your throat goes dry, rendering you unable to speak.

You just sit there silently and sob.

You’re discharged the following afternoon. Taehyun doesn’t speak to you the entire ride home and you feel like utter shit for it.

As you step into your shared apartment and kick off your shoes in the entryway, you decide to finally break the silence.

“Taehyun, I’m so sorry. You weren’t supposed to find out about this—“

“—Why? Why wouldn’t you want me to find out? They told me you passed out in the middle of the street! You could’ve gotten hurt! What if something serious happened to you and I never found out?”

You stand there in silence, tears filling your eyes. He’s never sounded this upset with you in the nearly two years you’ve been together. You could feel your heart shattering.

“Why’d you stop eating?”

The gravity in Taehyun’s voice makes your stomach drop. You need to sit down for this one.

You walk to the couch in the living room and Taehyun follows, sitting next to you.

“I starved myself because I wanted to be beautiful,” you say.

“You are beautiful.”

“But that’s not all. I wanted to be good enough, good enough for you.”

Taehyun looks at you, brows knit in concern. He takes your hand in his.

“What made you think that? Did someone say something to you?”

“No, no one said anything. It was all me. I kept seeing all those beautiful, successful female celebrities on TV and I-I wondered if you even felt good being seen with me, so I thought that… maybe if I stopped eating, I would be better for you.”

You feel so ashamed by even admitting this and, when you’re able to finally look at Taehyun, he looks devastated, like you admitted the greatest of sins to him.

“I never want you to say that again,” he says, sounding deeply hurt. “There’s no way you could be any more better for me. You’re perfect, Y/N. I can’t imagine being with anyone else except you. I've never been ashamed to be seen with you. You know that, don't you?"

Taehyun cups your cheek with his hand and it takes everything for you to not burst into tears.

“Don’t you?” he repeats softly and that drives you over the edge. “You know there’s nothing you could do to make me ashamed of you, right?”

You cry and he wipes your tears away with the pads of his thumbs.

“Not even now?” you ask between sniffles.

“No, honey, not even now,” he leans in and kisses your cheeks. “I don’t want to lose a single ounce of you.”

He kisses your face all over and when he kisses you on the lips, you smile into it. This is the happiest you've been all week and the most relief you've felt in a while. You feel so embarrassed for the tears that continue to slide down your cheeks, but Taehyun just wipes them away and kisses you.

It's when he kisses your ear that you feel a sudden shift in the mood. He nibbles your earlobe and his lips drag down to kiss down your jaw. Your breath hitches and you hold back a moan.

"Don't hold back," he whispers into your ear. "Let me know how good I make you feel."

You sigh as you feel his lips move to your neck and he bites and licks the flesh, leaving a few hickies in his wake. You hold onto him tighter, the fabric of his shirt balled up in your fist.

Taehyun's hands move to your hips and before you know it, you're sitting on his lap, straddling him. You're a little hesitant, not putting all of your weight on him.

Taehyun grabs your hand and places it on the center of his chest. His heart is pounding against your palm and it causes your own heartbeat to quicken.

“Feel that? Only you can do that,” he says. He takes your hand and drags his down his body, down his toned chest, past his chiseled abs, all the way down to his cock, already halfway hard in his sweatpants.

“This is all you, too,” he whispers and your breath catches in your throat when you feel his cock twitch under your fingers.

“Oh my god…” you say, shuddered and breathless.

Taehyun grips your hips hard and pulls you down so your full weight is on him and you grind on his clothed bulge. He's never been this rough with you before, and it's giving you butterflies. You roll your hips and you revel in his hands roaming your thighs, your ass, and your waist.

You return to each other's lips like a magnet to metal. You drag your tongue across Taehyun's bottom lip and he parts his lips so you can slot your tongue into his mouth.

You pull away panting, your lips shimmering with spit. You squirm, wanting to say exactly how you feel but the words are stuck in your throat as you look upon your boyfriend, his hair tousled, lips glossy, and eyes dark.

"What is it, honey? Use your words," he says, looking deep into your eyes.

"I-I need you so badly, I can’t take it."

"Then let's tend to that need right now," he says with a smirk. You head to the bedroom and you're surprised when Taehyun pushes you onto the bed and hovers over you, drinking in every inch of your body.

"God, you're so beautiful," Taehyun says. "No one else gets to see this except me."

He peels off his clothes, down to his boxers and he slowly undresses you, peppering kisses all over your body. He presses a thumb to your now dampened panties and watches with sparkling eyes as he rolls your panties off of you.

"Wait, my turn," you grab at the waistband of his boxers and the corner of his lips turn up into a smirk.

"Be my guest," he says confidently. Your hands tremble a little bit as look down at his clothed cock. You notice a damp spot and that only serves to make you wetter. You slowly pull the boxers down past his thighs and his hardened cock springs free. He kicks his boxers off and immediately comes back down to the bed to kiss you, his cock resting against your soft stomach.

He slides his thick cock against your aching pussy and you shudder when you feel a vein rub against your clit.

“You’re so wet,” he whispers sweetly. “Can’t wait to be inside of you, honey... But before that, I need you to promise me something."

"Hm?"

"Promise me that you'll eat when you're hungry and take care of yourself."

You blink, confused at the sudden 180.

"What?" you ask. Suddenly, you're jolted by Taehyun slapping his cock against your clit with a wet thwack. Your back arches off the bed and your eyes widen.

“Promise me or I won’t fuck you.”

You gulp and you can feel yourself blushing all the way to the tips of your ears.

“I-I promise,” you say before Taehyun slaps his cock against your clit repeatedly, causing you to squirm and moan.

“Promise what?”

“I-I promise I’ll eat.”

“And?”

“I promise I’ll take care of myself,” you whimper. "I promise I'll treat myself better."

Taehyun gives you a cute, boyish smile.

"Good," he leans down to rest his forehead against yours and kiss you. You feel the head of his cock poke and rub against your entrance and you whine. He pushes into you and you gasp, grabbing onto his arms to steady yourself as he slowly enters you, inch by inch. You clench around him tightly and he sighs.

"You feel amazing," he groans. "You okay?"

"Mhm, feels so **good," you moan and Taehyun leans down to kiss you again. He buries himself deeper into you until he bottoms out and you wrap your legs around his torso, shuddering at the sensation of him buried so deep inside of you. He pulls out all the way then sinks all the way back in to fuck you at a fast, even pace. Your eyes roll back in pleasure, relishing just how full he makes you feel.

"Mmm, I-I'm close, 'm so close," you mewl, clenching hard around Taehyun's cock.

“Cum for me,” he breathily demands as he reaches down to play with your clit, pleasure shooting through your body like lightning.

Your orgasm rips through you like nothing you'd ever felt before. Taehyun is relentless, continuing to fuck you as you ride the waves of your orgasm.

"That's it, that's it," he coos. "So good, baby." He swipes his thumb against your clit quickly as he thrusts into you, urging you to cum again. You feel a different kind of pressure building in your lower stomach, one that you can't stop from releasing until it's already happened. The sheets underneath you are soaked and your entire body heats up as you realized what you've done.

"Wow," Taehyun says, astonished. "I've never seen you do that before. Fuck, you're so wet."

He mercilessly pistons in and out of you, sweet moans spilling from his mouth as he cums inside of you. He buries his face in your shoulder and you can feel his lips curl into a smile.

“Hear that?” he asks.

Through the haze of your post-orgasm, you can hear the sound of wet skin slapping against skin as Taehyun lazily ruts into you, rolling his hips against yours.

“So messy… you made such a big mess all over my cock,” he babbles, breathless and impressed. You’re shocked to feel his cock twitch inside of you when he says that.

Taehyun slowly pulls out of you and you whine, already missing the presence of his cock inside of you. He rolls over next to you so that you’re laying shoulder to shoulder on the bed.

You both take a moment to catch your breath, your breathing still ragged from just moments ago.

“Come here,” he says. “I want you to do that on my face next.”

“Taehyun!” you gasp. You don’t remember him being so filthy like this before. He’s had his flirty and handsy moments in the past, but those were nothing compared to this side of him.

He motions for you to come straddle him and you’re immediately seized with nervousness.

“Don’t be shy, love,” he says. “Or do I need to get you over here myself?”

“Okay, okay,” you prop yourself up on your elbows and slowly inch yourself closer toward Taehyun until you’re straddling his waist.

“Good girl, now put your thighs on either side of my chest.”

This is the first time he’s ever called you a good girl and honestly? You want him to say it a million more times. A tingle goes down your spine as you follow his instructions, maybe he should boss you around like this more often.

You feel more exposed than ever as you just barely hover over his face. You’ve never done anything in this position before, your heart is racing out of excitement and worry.

“Are you sure you’re okay with doing this?”

“Mhm,” Taehyun says. “I’ve been dreaming of doing this for a while now, actually.”

“But what if I hurt you? I don’t wanna put too much weight on you and—“

“—Y/N, you’re thinking too hard about this.”

“I know,” you say. You squeak when you feel Taehyun press a kiss to your pussy.

“Trust me,” he says softly and your heart melts. He reaches a hand up to play with your pussy, fingers gliding around your folds. “I wish you could see this. Everything about you is so pretty, Y/N.”

You could say the same thing about him. There’s something about seeing Taehyun lie there on his back, dark brown hair sticking to his forehead and his big, brown eyes made darker by his dilated pupils that made him look angelic.

“Lower yourself down on my face, good girl.”

Again with the good girl. Does he know he can make you do anything just by calling you that?

You take a deep breath and lower yourself down onto his face and your breathing becomes ragged the moment you feel the flat of his tongue against your pussy.

His hands come up to grip your thighs and hips. You bite your bottom lip to contain your moans as Taehyun goes to work on your pussy, tongue sliding in and around your folds and the ridge of his nose bumping against your clit. It feels so good, better than you ever could have imagined.

You feel his tongue slide into your pussy and your hands fly to the headboard, gripping tightly as you gasp and moan.

“Fuck, Taehyun…!” you exclaim. He moans against your pussy and the vibrations push you closer to the edge. As he makes out with your pussy from this position, it’s so impossible to hold back. You carefully grind yourself against his tongue and before you know it, you’re seeing stars as your back arches and you cum hard, thighs trembling and hips rocking back and forth at a steady rhythm as you ride out your orgasm.

“S-Sorry!” you stammer as you lift your hips to allow Taehyun to come up for air, but you’re shocked when he pulls your hips back down and gives your core a few long licks and swirls his tongue around your clit. Your thighs clench and you whimper from the overstimulation. When he finally taps your thighs to indicate that he’s done, you pull off of him, straddling his waist.

“You taste so fucking good, my love,” he mumbles, chest heaving as he looks at you with half lidded eyes and the bottom half of his face wet and shimmering from your juices. He looks so fucked out, like he was the one who was just eaten out like a man starved. “You put every fruit on this planet to shame.”

"Stop, you're making me blush," you say with a shy chuckle.

"Don't get shy now, you were just riding my face a few second ago." You both laugh and Taehyun sits up and rests his hands on your soft waist. He gives you the softest smile and looking up at you with those beautiful brown eyes and that's when it hits you.

You love this man, much more than words could ever describe.

You wrap your arms around his neck and bury your face in the crook of his neck.

"I love you," Taehyun whispers into your skin and holds you tighter. You melt into his embrace, never wanting to leave from his arms or this moment. You wish you could live in his arms.

It's not until both you and Taehyun's stomachs start growling that the moment is ruined. You pull away from the embrace and look at each other with wide eyes and erupt into laughter.

"Guess we should get something to eat, huh?" Taehyun asks.

"Yeah, I guess so," you say, still giggling.

"Why don't I go run us a bath and you order our meal for tonight?"

"Sounds good to me."

You part with a kiss and, even though he's just in the next room over, you're so overcome with love for him. You get teary eyed as you browse your go-to delivery app.

In that moment, you're so thankful for his love, thankful you have each other.

[xkaidaxxxx]

A person worth loving

Body shaming, foul actions and language, suicidal thoughts, rape, fluffy, Happy Ending( don’t worry)

AGED UP!

Sorry for any errors 3am writing sorry

TRIGGER WARNING

Gojo Satoru is your teacher since you started jujutsu high school. Since it was a small school it was easy to teach everyone based off their year with different curriculums.

Being in a small school meant some people know your secrets before you do. Inumaki is your boyfriend. How did that happen….one day you fell into his trap. He managed to get you into skipping school. You had fun the entire day with him..until midnight hit. He walked you back to your dorm somewhat forced himself in. You guys talked about random things, you knew Inumaki was a rebel but not like this. He handed you a joint. “ Come on pretty girl. You’ll feel amazing.” He said. You were so Innocent. New into the dating world. You let yourself let go. Those type of days went on for weeks. He was constantly flirting,gifting you things, being a good guy, when in reality it was part of his plan. His plan on making a VIRGIN chubby girl fall in love and taking her innocence. He knew you’d be so easy to fool. Maki is your best friend. She warned you constantly. “I’m telling you because I care. You’re not only my best friend…you’re like my sister.” You rolled your eyes,” Inumaki is an amazing person Maki. He’s sweet and kind. He’d never do anything to hurt me. We’re going on a date. I’m so excited!” You said giggling. Inumaki walked into your room scanning your body. He was grossed out. In his eyes you were nothing but fat walking around. “ You look wonderful but you need to lose weight. Your stomach rolls when you sit down. Come on let’s go.”

As time passed by you stopped talking to Maki…“ Inumaki stop..h-hey no stop it.” You said struggling to get out of his grip. “ Oh come on we’ve been dating for almost 6 months. It’s about time we have sex.” He said smirking. He forced your shorts and panties off. “ I bet your pussy is so tight.” Tears slipped. “ S-stop Inu! I’m not ready…ho-“ you couldn’t finish. You felt him deep inside. He didn’t prep you. He slammed in not caring about you at all. You felt sharp pain as he thrusted in and out. You kicked a lot but eventually felt defeated and stopped. “ fu-fuck baby so good.” He groaned. You felt a sting on your face. He slapped you harshly. “ You’re taking me so well…good girl. Not making me struggle anymore. Oh come on give me a smile.” He spoke continued to roam your body. Time passed. “ Well Happy anniversary.” He winked changing and left. You laid there. Blood covering your thighs. Face red from the slap. His handprint on your neck. You cried all night remembering all the times Maki warned you.The follow days were horrible. Gojo noticed your change in clothing style. You wore jeans instead of shorts,kept your hair down, wearing thin long sleeves shirts.“ You completely changed your style y/n. Love the dark colors.” He said moving close to you. You smiled. Genuine smile. “There’s that cute smile. We can have lunch together. My treat.” He said smiling. Gojo had a feeling that your relationship with Inumaki was hell. A shit show. He noticed how you moved. Getting up you’d wince. The way you walked sometimes you’d stumble. Inumaki was waiting for you at the door with his evil eyes. You got scared. “N-no thanks sir. I always have lunch with Inumaki.” You replied grabbing your bento box. “ You should tell him you want to eat alone or with old friends next time.” Gojo said with a serious face and tone. You laughed it off and left with Inu.

“Stop eating so much. That’s why you’re fat. Clothes look bad on you. Skip meals.” He judged as you ate. “You’re right.” You replied closing your bento box. “Good. Ignore your hunger.” You stayed silent as he ate. “Are you bleeding? Ugh you stained the floor. Are you on your period?” He asked. You cut your thighs and wrists. “No. I fell yesterday and landed wrong.” You replied cleaning the stain you left behind on the ground. “Don’t talk to me that way. This is your only warning.” He replied in a stern voice. “It won’t happen again.” You held your tears back following him back to class. “ Everyone settle down. 1st years math exam then 30minutes of training. 2nd years training time. Outside now. Don’t go crazy. 3rd years it’s exam time. All subjects.” He spoke handing out the exams to the 1st and 3rd years. You finished your science questions first then reading and math then English. As you circled a question you felt your pants soaking the blood. Your eyes widened. “Y/n is everything okay?” Gojo asked standing beside you. You flinched. “Y-yeah chilly for me today.” You replied. He took his jacket off placing it around your shoulders. You couldn’t help but blush. It made you happy. “Thank you sir.” You quickly put it on. You were chubby so you did struggle a bit to zip it up. He noted to buy a size or two up that way you could wear his clothes. One day at least. You’re 18. Legal but one day you’d wear his clothes.

You were the last to finish your exam. Everyone left the room. “You’re still here? Is everything alright?” Gojo asked watching you. You had to play this carefully. “ I um...I’m stained.” You confessed. He realized what you meant. “You got your period.” He asked. Normal guys would get grossed out. He didn’t. He’s totally cool about it. “Yes.” “Now stand. I’ll clean the chair. Wrap my jacket around your waist. It’ll cover the stain. I’ll walk you to your dorm.” He said. You stood up and he did exactly what he said. Cleaned it with alcohol and alcohol wipes. You felt sad you had to lie. Once you both reached your dorm you thanked him. “Alright shower and stay warm. If the cramps kick in hard I can go buy you Midol.” You smiled. Gojo is a man you wish you had. Not an abusive guy. “Thanks sir.” You both exchanged numbers. He left. You saw Inumaki “It’s about time I teach you a lesson.” You whimpered. Big Mistake bringing Gojo to your dorm and exchanging numbers.

One weekend you told Inu you’d visit your parents. You lied. “Hey beautiful.” Gojo said. “Hi handsome .” “Today I’m spoiling you. Get whatever you want. I mean whatever.” He said walking into the first store. He followed you as you looked around. A pair of navy blue platforms caught your attention. You saw the price 230 dollars. You quickly lost interest. Gojo called a worker over. “Ma’am may you get these shoes in a size 7.5” he smiled. The lady nodded and left. “They’re expensive.” “anything for you darling” he said. “Here you go sir.” The lady said handing the shoes over. “Thank you madam.” You smiled as you tried the shoes on. At the check out he paid 957 dollars. He held the bags. Walking to another store you saw a bag you’ve been wanting. “Grab it baby with the matching wallet too.” You thought-he did say anything..- once it was charged you were in heaven. Best 3,700 dollars he’s spent to see you happy. Hours passed“Mhm baby here’s your new phone and laptop. You needed an upgrade.” Your jaw dropped. This one was over the top. Almost 1,999 for the laptop and the phone each.Girls noticed the amount of bags you had. They whispered that you’re having sex with him to buy you things. “Don’t listen. You’re my girl.” He said kissing you. You returned it. “Now is there anything you want or need?” “Feminine products and g-groceries.” You replied embarrassed. Hours passed. You set your things down. He helped placing the clothes away. You finished the process of transferring info to your new phone and laptop. “Hey Maki said yo” Inu held his anger back. “We’ll call later Kay.” You said to Gojo and he left worried. Beating time.

You noticed Gojo did little things that made your day. He did flirt a lot but you loved it. It was hard to date him well you were with Inu and he’s your teacher. You noticed more happiness when being with him throughout the day. Although you knew Inu was watching. Knowing you’d learn a lesson everyday. It was worth it. Gojo was everything and more to you. He always makes you smile. Always giving you his heart.

It was now 8 months together with Inu…he made you take him every week. Whether you liked it or not. “ You piece of shit! Go to hell!” You yelled crying as he hit you. Inu was fully clothed however was very eager to take it all off. He wanted to teach you a lesson first. You were beyond lucky he never dared to use his technique on you. Your teacher was on a night stroll. He heard your yelling from your dorm. “I knew it. That asshole.” He whispered. Gojo didn’t hesitate to run over and break down your door. You were naked, bent over your desk. Hand prints, bruises and bites everywhere. His heart stopped for a moment. Rage took over his mind. You got away from Inumaki coving yourself with a blanket. You witnessed Gojo beating him. Blood on his hands. You let him beat Inumaki. He deserved it. They bumped into things in the room. Your desk, the night bedside table, the body mirror. It got way out of hand. You were scared. “911. Y-yes that’s it.Move y/n. I’ve got this.” You spoke grabbing your phone. A few minutes passed. Cops and ambulances surround the area. Gojo gave the final punch knocking Inumaki out. He walked over to you staying at a distance. “M-may I hold you?” He asked. You rushed into his arms holding the blanket around yourself. “ Y-you’re safe now.” Gojo held you carefully. “ Arms above your head. Now!” One of the 4 cops yelled. Reading the room wrong. One loaded his gun. “N-No stop. He saved me. Don’t sh-shoot. S-stop. Stop it. No No don’t hit me. Don’t hurt me. Stop.” You spoke.They triggered your fears. “ Put the guns down. She’s scared. Do you have any idea what shes been through?” Gojo said holding you close. Not wanting to let you go. Paramedics walked in helping Gojo lay you on the bed. “You’re going to be okay sweetie. What’s your name?” The lady asked. Your mind was fuzzy. “ My name..y/n l/n. Gojo.” You looked around as they secured the bed on the ambulance. “Where is he?” You asked. “ Calm down. You need to relax.” You hit the paramedic who was only trying to check your vitals. “S-stop stay away!Gojo! Help me! Make them go away! Gojo!!” You yelled scared. You’re triggered. It’s an okay response. Gojo ran over getting on the ambulance. He didn’t get to finish his statement to the cops. “I’m here. You’re good. Relax. Let them do their job. They’re making sure you’re okay.” He held your hand. Instantly you relaxed.

Hours later Gojo finished his police report and stayed with you at the hospital. “ s-so..what are you looking for?” Gojo asked the doctor and nurses.“ Since you’re not a parent nor guardian we are not allowed to release information about the patient. “ We have to ask you to leave the room.” Shoko spoke. The cops, male nurses and Gojo left the room. Shoko quickly took her phone out messaging Gojo about what’s going to happen. “ Sweetheart. We have to examine you okay…see if you’re healthy down there.” You looked at the nurses, “I need him here.” Shoko brought him inside. “Y/n?” He reached through the curtain. Finding your hand. Your fingers intertwined. You both relaxed. You winced. You knew they’d have to check for STDs or any vaginal issues. Once that finished. They lifted the gown further up. Applying gel on your lower stomach. “Y-you’re kidding right? There’s no way!” You yelled. “Y/n? Shh it’s alright. I can’t pass the curtain. Privacy you know.” He spoke. As they moved the stick around. Nothing was found. You were so relieved.

Medical proof of sexual abuse was given. Inumaki was locked up behind bars for many years to come.

A year passed. 19yrs old. You graduated and now you’re a full fledged sorcerer!

“You look so sexy.” Gojo said hugging you from behind. You smiled. “Thank you for buying me the dress. I love it.” You replied. You were finally so confident. All it took was love. “ it compliments your curves. Love handles. Rolls. Your thighs. You’re so sexy.” You couldn’t help but giggle noticing his problem. He groaned. “3rd time today.” “Oh really?” You asked. “Yeah. You rubbed up against me when waking up, then you walked around with only panties and my shirt on. Then this dress.” He complains about it but always fixes his hard in front of you. Shamelessly. You enjoyed watching him. The way he throws his head back moaning. His dick twitching. The way he teases himself by stroking himself fast then slow. You even touched yourself too. Showing each other how you masturbate. You both didn’t want to go farther than that. You both promised to take it slow. “Don’t go. I need to see you.” He spoke stroking himself fast. He’s sensitive. You blushed sitting down. “please cum for me Satoru.” You said in a soft voice and that’s all it took. Cum spurted onto his hand. “I love you in many ways y/n” he said. You grabbed his hand and licked it clean. “Y-You don’t have to..we’ve only started dating 5 months ago and started our sexual relations last month. Don’t force yourself.” He said putting his boxers and jeans back on. “I wanted to try it. It tastes good actually” you confessed, cheeks blushed. Gojo held you close. “I’m in love with you.” Both said in unison. Laugher bounced off the walls. Love in the air. As you cuddled on the couch you both said fuck going out. In each other’s arms is all you wanted to do. Cuddle up and sleep,

[palimpsessed]

Haven’t really written anything new and I’m still dipping my toes back in here, but I have more dead darlings from Strictly Professional, so why not share? It’s truly a shame I couldn’t make a place for some of these lines, and I doubt they’ll be of use in the future. Anyway, it’s fun to let these live on their own, and I will likely do this for other fics in the future.

After finishing the first draft, I thought things were going to be pretty smooth sailing on the edit. And then I got to Baz’s first POV of Day 2 and realized it was a mess. There was almost no transition from Baz panicking to Baz flirting. I worked on that scene for three days to get it where it needed to be, and some lines I loved simply had to go.

I also realized that I needed to structure chapters 1 and 2 as mirrors, with their POVs in opposite order. This led to a couple of scenes having to be rewritten from the other perspective, and that meant some internal narration had to be removed.

Did you need that context? Probably not, but I find process interesting, so I’m sharing a little peek into mine for those who like it.

1. Pulled from Day 2 (Baz POV)

“I'd do it all again. I would right now, too, if you asked me. I'd have you right here on this table, if that's what you wanted, bugger the consequences. Or other things."

I have to throw a hand over my mouth to avoid the howl of surprise that tries to burst out of it.

He simply smiles innocently and takes a sip of his own water. "Offer's…on the table," he murmurs, failing to suppress his smile.

2. Pulled from Day 1 (Baz POV)

That should frighten me. I don't like feeling as though I don't have control over my own body. But I can't stay in my head long enough to muster the proper shame, self-loathing, and regret that would ordinarily be plaguing me like the Furies by now.

3. Pulled from Day 3 (POV change)

I missed this, having this—these quiet morning intimacies, whispers and secrets shared over pillows, the presence and weight of another body in bed with mine—even more than I missed having sex.

4. Pulled from Day 3 (POV change)

He draws his hand back and crawls across the expanse of bed to place a kiss on the corner of my mouth, where his thumb had been stroking earlier. He's still smiling; Salisbury must be the world's leading expert on kissing while smiling.

5. Pulled from Day 2 (Simon POV)

"I don’t mean to presume. I know that this is just, you know, this. What happens at the work conference, stays at the work conference, right?"

I know my attempt at humour was pathetic at best, but someone had to try to lighten the mood.

It doesn't work. If anything, it makes Baz look a bit stricken. It was probably a bad idea to bring up the conference right now. (It was definitely a bad idea.) The very last thing Baz needs is to be reminded of all the ways our little tryst is a walking, talking ethics violation.

"Well, I would never presume, either," he says. "I'm fairly certain it would be a fireable offence if I did."

6. Pulled from Day 2 (Simon POV)

"Don't change the subject," he says.

"What subject were we on?" I ask.

"Your impeccable pectorals."

"Oh! So that's why you like my chest."

"It's a leading contender. And I meant what I said. You do look powerful. Strong. Sturdy."

He adds quietly, "some of us could use sturdy."

Thanks for your tags today! Going to go read your posts now. @ileadacharmedlife @j-nipper-95 @larkral @nightimedreamersworld @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @hushed-chorus @blackberrysummerblog Will add some tags for @facewithoutheart @raenestee @artsyunderstudy @cutestkilla @mostlymaudlin @stillmadaboutpetra @sillyunicorn @tea-brigade @aristocratic-otter @thewholelemon @onepintobean @fatalfangirl @martsonmars @ivelovedhimthroughworse @jbrrring @shrekgogurt @moodandmist @letraspal @wetheformidables

[flowersintheimpala69]

CW // In depth discussion of eating disorders

Thinking about Sam and dean’s disorded eating (I know I JUST posted about this but I wanna talk about it in more depth)(also half of this is headcanon but some is canon)

Sam attempting to eat “clean” so he can stay good and pure because he feels like he’s been tainted being Lucifer’s vessel AND the demon blood in him. He just wants to always prove he’s good inside but also he does restricts/eats “clean” as a way of control. He lacks sm control cuz of the lucifer thing and being a hunter (because yea. He could stop but not really), and when he was younger he never was able to control the food he ate, AND the lack of body autonomy he has in general (being taken advantage of and sexually assaulted, being possessed, not being allowed to make his own choices about his life like with gadreel—I totally misspelled that but u get the point—possession and not being allowed to choose to use his powers/demon blood) so controlling his eating is his way of saying “fuck you, I choose what i eat and I’m gonna eat good to make up for all my bad.” I also believe he has some warped perception of his body, like that one line where he calls himself chubby when he was 12 and then you see him as a kid and it’s like “??? Bro ur so skinny what are you saying”. The constant exercise and obsession with health is also a way of control. While in the present I headcanon him as orthorexic, when he was younger I think he was a bit of a binger (partly cuz of food insecurity and as a coping mechanism) but around the age of ~13 he changed to more restriction.

Dean’s eating is more about binging because of food insecurity. John would leave dean alone with Sam sm and dean would have to give up food for Sam. I headcanon the only time he really got to EAT was when John came back from a hunt and he’d take them out to eat at a diner and he could order as much food as possible and he’s finally not HUNGRY so he associates food with positive memories.

Despite this, dean never really gained weight cuz he exercises sm with hunting. Neither does Sam cuz he’s so restrictive BUT post canon (where dean dosnt die cuz FUCK THAT) they start seeing therapists (finally) and they both gain weight cuz Sam is eating more and dean is not hunting anymore (not unhealthily gaining weight cuz Sam was basically starving himself before and dean is binging less) and they’re both a little insecure about it (especially Dean who’s so use to being a heartthrob but now he’s a bit soft in the middle) but sam thinks it’s SO attractive and he still thinks Dean is hella hot and he loves being able to grab more of Dean when they have sex. When Sam gains weight and is super stressed cuz he gained like 15 pounds and also lose some muscle mass and Dean just looks at him like “u were literally starving before you’re just at a normal weight now and I was so worried you would drop dead cuz you were lowkey malnourished and eating 500 calories a day and you’re still hot so”

And sometimes they have hard days. Sometimes dean relapses and binges to the point he’s sick and he just feels shame shame shame. Sometimes dean gets stressed and he buys 10 packs of peanut butter cause what if they run out of food and he needs to hoard it or else he’ll starve or Sammy wil starve and-.

Sometimes Sam can’t even think about eating buttered toast because it’s just calories calories calories and he has a panic attack because the food Dean made him used canola oil instead of avocado oil. Sometimes Sam refuses to have his shirt off when they have sex or in general cuz he’s just so ashamed of what’s underneath.

But the good days out weight the bad and on those bad days they’re there for eachother and they love eachother.

then they kiss and grow old together anyways that’s it.

(Sorry this is not coherent at ALL but I have big thoughts about them and had to throw it into the void)

[afterdarkprincess]

The Devil’s in the Details (But You got a Friend in Me)- Part 2

Samijey Fic- AU From the Royal Rumble

So just a heads up- I’ve changed a few things in this fic from when Part 1 was posted. Nothing major, but if you notice anything’s different that’s why :) Those updates and edits will show up on the full version of this fic when it goes up on AO3.

Thank you SO much to @elementaldoughnut12 for letting me use her chubby Sami prompt, I hope I’m doing it justice 🥰

And thank you to @feelschicken for always being my sounding board when I need it and letting me drag you into new fandoms!

Some warnings for this fic because it is Explicit and reminder as always that my blog is 18+

This part contains: Conversations about weight gain (zero shame involved) a small Panic Attack, Oral Sex, Body Worshipping, and Coming Untouched (mostly)

Part One Here

—-

That nights' Smackdown passes in a blur, a fight between him and Jimmy and the Alpha Academy that they easily win, taking Gable down with the 1D for the pin.

Roman hasn’t given them any explicit direction since they’re still riding on the momentum of Sami’s injury, which really doesn’t sit well with Jey.

After Smackdown, the rest of the weekend is booked up with House shows, and endless hours in the car with Jimmy and Solo driving between cities.

Despite being crammed into a car with the two people he’s supposed to be closest to, Jey feels more alone than ever.

He has another week and a half before a 3 day break when he can return to Sami. It can’t come soon enough.

---

This pattern continued for a few months, Jey going to the house in Florida whenever he has a break to see Sami. The visits are never as long as he wants them to be, and the time in between when he’s working and traveling seems like torture.

Jey ostensibly has a separate home, an apartment he keeps for mail and tax stuff. But the house where Sami stays rapidly replaces it as “home” to him.

Sami has put on some weight in the meantime, what with being so well fed from Chef Uce-ardee and not being able to do much in the gym other than bulk up his arms, but it makes Jey happy to see Sami so clearly well cared for. His pale skin glows with health, who cares if there’s more of him?

Sami moans about his shirts not fitting, so Jey makes sure on his last few trips to bring lots of merch oversized. He tries his best not to think about why it makes him so pleased to see Sami swimming in a 2XL shirt with his face on it.

Jey has a tight schedule with Wrestlemania coming up, their feud with the Brawling Brutes now heating up to a fever pitch. Jey’s gonna make those bastards pay for what they did to Sami, and he’s gonna do it on the biggest stage of them all.

But that means a solid 6 week stretch through March and April where he can’t make a trip home to Sami, between press and fan appearances and shows.

Jey’s miserable. They text and call each other of course, but it just isn’t the same. Jimmy gives him a hard time whenever he steps out of their hotel room to call Sami, with a teasing “Say hi to your girl for me, Uce!” to which he just rolls his eyes and grumbles for him to shut up.

It’s hard to argue with that logic though, when just hearing Sami’s voice over the phone is the only bright spot of his days.

Somewhere along the way Jey’s feelings for Sami have became more than just a brotherly bond that comes from fighting together. Sami understands him in ways that no one else does, makes him smile and laugh when he’s had a shitty day.

He’s the last person he wants to talk to before going to sleep, and in the dark of shared hotel rooms, Jey’s mind wanders to think about what it might be like to really share a home with Sami, to share a bed and a life together. To always have the other man in his corner.

The only thing that gives Jey pause is the ever looming presence of Roman.

There’s a reason he only calls Sami from the safety of hotel rooms and the cover of night. Roman’s used Jey’s devotion to his brother against him before, made it crystal clear that if Jey doesn’t follow orders, Jimmy would pay the price.

What would Roman do to Sami if he knows how Jey feels? If Jey puts a toe out of line or talks back, would it be Sami’s neck this time?

In his mind’s eye he can see Roman with his hands around Sami’s throat, choking the life out of him as he struggles and reaches for Jey, frozen and powerless to do anything.

Would it be worth it? To love Sami but never be able to keep him safe from his own family?

“You don’t have to do this alone anymore, you know,” Sami voice on the phone cuts through the doom and gloom of his thoughts. “Whatever’s on your mind, we can work through it together.”

Jey laughs ruefully, how does Sami always know?

“Jus’ really miss you, Sami. Things been real intense lately, dunno, worried over nothin’.” Jey rubs his face with his hands, trying to keep himself together.

“It’s not nothing if it’s botherin’ you like this, Jey. Is it Roman? Is he giving you a hard time?”

It really wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, being ordered to take out opponents during Roman’s fights, taking it like a good guard dog.

“The usual, jus’ tired of fightin’ his fights, you know? Got my own fight to deal with. Gotta kick Holland’s ass for even thinkin’ bout touchin’ you.” He tries for a light tone to brighten the mood, but he really didn’t meant to sound so possessive.

Sami is quiet for a moment, and Jey thinks maybe he’s fucked everything up.

“Wish I could be there to help, you don’t always have to fight my fights too. And I gotta teach that asshole a lesson for coming at you like that.” Sami laughs, but Jey can hear the frustration in his voice.

How can Jey tell him that it’s never a hardship to fight Sami’s fights? That he would volunteer to go to war with him before being commanded to do anything by Roman ever again?

Jey’s silent for too long, because Sami’s voice comes over the line again.

“Miss you too, Jey- Just a few more weeks, yeah?”

Jey blinks away the tears that threaten to fall, trying to push down the ache in his chest.

“You just miss my cookin’, I knew it.”

“I got plenty of your food in my freezer!! I’m gonna be up a few weight classes when I come back as it is.”

“Ain’t nothing wrong with that, Uce,” Jey can imagine Sami in the house, sitting up on the couch, big t-shirt barely covering his boxers and thighs, the picture of comfort and home. “M’coming home as soon as I can,” He can hear the naked longing in his own voice.

“I’ll be waiting here,” Sami might have meant that as a joke, but Jey hears the same longing in Sami’s voice and it makes the distance hurt all the more. “You should get some sleep, it’s late.”

“Yeah, you right…”

Jey trails off, but he really doesn’t want to end the conversation.

“Go to bed, Jey!!” Sami laughs, “And tell your brothers I said Hi.”

“Those clowns ain’t gettin’ nothin’ from me,” Jey grumbles. “Night, Sami.”

“Night, Jey.” Sami’s voice is soft, and there’s the sound of his breathing before finally the line goes dead.

It would be smarter for Jey to put some distance between them, to give this up to keep Sami safe and not give Roman another bargaining chip. It’s what he would have done a year ago, two years ago.

But Sami is right, he’s not alone in this anymore. And Sami isn’t a damsel to be saved. They can fight for this together.

He’s got weeks to decide how to do this, but the next time he sees Sami, he’s going to make sure Sami knows he’s in his corner too.

---

The week before Wrestlemania arrives before he knows it, and while Jey is thankful that his time without Sami is going quickly, he’ll really only feel better once the event is over and done with.

He calls Sami almost every night, and gets text messages throughout the day of little things happening back in Florida; the birds that hang out on the feeder out the window in the kitchen, little snippets of what’s happening on whatever show Sami’s decided to watch.

This time it’s a picture of Sami in the bathroom mirror, flexing his definitely bulked up arms, the stripes of stretch marks on his full soft belly visible and tantalizing.

Jey nearly chokes on his lunch.

He’s scheduled for a one on one match against Ridge Holland on Raw, and it’s an opportunity to make a big statement and set the tone for their tag match.

It’s also a chance for him to get some well earned payback for injuring Sami. The big show will be for Sofi, but if he can get some shots in he will.

Jimmy comes out with him of course, but Solo is nowhere to be found backstage, and of course Ridge brought that mangy dog partner of his so chances of interference are high.

Jey steels himself in the corner of the ring while Ridge eggs on the crowd that’s booing him.

Technically the Brawling Brutes are supposed to be good guys to the crowd, but Sami had endeared himself to more than just the bloodline over the last year, and the WWE universe was about as forgiving for Sami’s injury as Jey was.

As the ref comes in to start the match, Ridge took a few hulking steps toward him, and spit down at Jey’s feet.

“Make sure ya tell yer little boyfriend I said hullo, been a lot easier around here without ’im. Shoulda taken ’im out sooner.” The taller man sneers.

It’s clearly meant to rile him up and get him off his game, and he tries his best not to let the rage that boils in his blood overcome him, but he sees red as he goes for a super kick that immediately gets caught in Ridge’s giant hands, tugging him off his balance and starting the match in his opponent’s favor.

It’s an uphill battle from there, with Butch taking his opportunity to mess with his fingers, which always hurts like a bitch, but he’s knocked away pretty quickly by Jimmy and no lasting damage is done.

Jey finally gets the upper hand with a splash, but he takes the time to drag the man to the corner of the ring to get one Helluva kick in before making the pin.

The crowd goes wild, and the arena is filled with his entrance music, and the cover buys him a few moments to lean close to spit next to his face.

“Keep Sami’s name out yo’ damn mouth.” He grabs the back of Ridge’s shirt, raising his face up a few inches before slamming him back into the ring. “And if you ever so much as THINK ‘bout touchin’ him again, yo’ gon’ have a lot more than a busted knee!”

Jey stomps his foot down onto Holland’s knee, relishing in the howl it emits from the other man. It definitely crosses a line to do that unscripted, but Jey can’t find it in himself to care.

He stalks out of the ring, victorious, rejoining with Jimmy before they exit together.

It doesn’t take long for him to get cleared by medical and get back to the locker room to his phone, where he finds a slew of text messages from Sami.

I’ve got Raw turned on, kick his ass, Uce! 7:19pm

I don’t know what he said to you, but it’s not worth losing the match over- you can do this! 7:40pm

WOOOO-Way to go, Jey!! Hope you don’t get chewed out for that stomp though! 7:57pm

Just headed to bed but still awake- call me when you get to the hotel? Wanna tell you good job over the phone! 8:15pm

It’s almost midnight on the east coast, but knowing Sami he’s still awake waiting for him to call.

He shoots him a quick message, letting him know it’ll be about a half hour if he doesn’t want to wait up.

No worries- I can wait up for you :) 8:56pm

Jey doesn’t know what he’s done to deserve Sami, isn’t sure that he deserves him at all given his past and the things he’s done. He’s never known this kind of unconditional support before, and he’ll do whatever it takes to keep it.

“What you smilin’ at, Uce?” Jimmy shoves a hand at Jey’s shoulder playfully, knocking him from his train of thought and alerting him to both of his brothers’ presence.

“Jus’ thinkin’ bout how that dick Holland sounded when I put my boot in his knee,” It’s a white lie, but it’s better than showing all his cards. He’d like to trust in his brothers not to run off and tell Roman his every move, but some days he’s not so sure.

Solo nods, arms cross and face unreadable, and Jimmy laughs as he gathers up his bag.

“Serves that douchebag right for takin’ out our dawg! Glad you got a shot in ‘fore Saturday anyway, Uce. Make takin’ them down that much easier.”

Jey shrugs his own bag over his shoulder, “Can’t wait to put ‘em down for good, tired of seein’ their ugly mugs.”

“No Joke! Especially Butch,” Jimmy shakes his head, as if trying to dispel the image from his head. “I think that dude bites, for real.”

They all pack up into their rental to head back to the hotel, and despite the chatter that streams out of Jimmy’s mouth and the occasional grunt from Solo, all he can think about is hearing Sami’s voice as soon as possible.

__

Jey wakes up early for Day One of Wrestlemania, determined to face the day head on.

He gets through a few hours at the gym before making himself a protein shake for breakfast and checking his phone. He generally tries to avoid social media before a big match other than the stuff he’s required to post, but there’s a few messages from Sami, just a good morning and encouragement for the show tonight.

Even with the time difference, it’s a bit early for a text from Sami, who’s been using his recovery time to get into the sleeping habits of a teenager on summer vacation, often not waking until 10 or 11, but Jey doesn’t pay it much mind.

The rest of the morning is taken up with interviews over the phone before he’s taken off for a photo shoot and press op with Jimmy before finally heading to the stadium.

They’d done some dry runs in Sofi yesterday, but the sheer size of the place is still overwhelming. It’s still hard for Jey to believe sometimes that he went from wrestling with his family in their living room to all this.

There’s a pang in his chest that tells him that Sami should be here too, that he would have had his own Wrestlemania moments under these lights if it hadn’t been for his knee.

But at least Sami was away from Roman and his schemes and the pressure to perform.

The Tribal Chief had been particularly demanding in the last few weeks as he made appearances on Raw and Smackdown, making Jey wonder if it wasn’t better when his cousin only deigned to show up for Live Events.

This feud with Cody Rhodes was sure to be ended after this weekend and hopefully they could all move on from the damn Royal Rumble, and Jey could enjoy some breathing room from his family.

It would be another two weeks before he could go home to see Sami, but after enduring the last four, two weeks seems like nothing.

He just has to get through the match tonight, get rid of the Brawling Brutes and deal with everything else after.

---

The bell rings, signaling the end of the match.

Jey stares up at the lights above, the chorus of boos from the crowd is deafening. He rolls out of the ring to join his brother, grasping his hand like they were children again hiding from a thunderstorm.

They’d lost.

Sheamus had interfered, delivering a painful brogue kick to Jimmy’s chest and taking him out of the equation 30 minutes into the match, when Jey was exhausted and well past ready for a tag after a brutal bout with Butch. Holland made the tag when his back was turned and plowed into him like a truck.

Jey could barely tell which way was up, but he could hear the other man spitting words into his ear.

“Ya couldn’t protect ‘im then, and ya can’t now. Stay down, ya piece o’ shit.”

In his delirium, Holland’s thick accent turned to Roman’s smooth tones and his heart is frozen in fear, watching as his cousin gave the order for Solo to hit Sami with the spike. The scene twisted to his new recurring nightmare, Roman choking Sami as he cries and reaches for Jey, who is stuck, immobile, a failure again.

He felt the cover, felt his leg in the air and the count, but he was frozen and numb until he rolled out and felt the contact of Jimmy’s hand.

They failed.

He failed.

The walk backstage is long and painful, his lungs protesting with each step. There will be hell to pay for losing the tag titles, and his mind is already racing with thoughts of how this conversation with Roman will go.

Jey gets cleared pretty quickly, his ribs were a bit bruised but otherwise fine. Jimmy’s taken back to get his shoulder checked out, so Jey returned to their locker room alone.

But when he arrives, the Tribal Chief and the Wiseman are nowhere to be found.

Solo is unwrapping the tape on his hand slowly, he’d taken Sheamus out, but it was too little too late.

Solo nods at him, “Sami’s here,”

Wait, what?

He stares at his younger brother blankly, “What you say, Uce?”

“Sami’s here,” Solo nods again, and Jey twists to look behind him.

Like a mirage in the desert, Sami stands there, knee in a thick brace still but without the scooter contraption that helped him around the house. His face is drawn with worry and he stares at the hand Jey has braced against his ribs.

“Jey-“ He starts, taking a step forward, but Jey closes the distance, holding Sami’s shoulders like a lifeline and using every ounce of restraint not to wrap his arms around him.

“You’re here,” Jey hears the words tumble out of his mouth.

Sami laughs softly, “Yeah, Uce. I’m here.”

So many emotions are tearing through him, the relief and feeling of home at seeing Sami again, the exhaustion and frustrations from the match, combined with the leftover terror at Holland’s words, that Sami wasn’t safe and never could be as long as he’s by his side.

Sami gently removes his hands from his shoulders, gingerly stepping around him and pushing Jey to sit on the couch.

“Solo, can you take Jey’s papers to management for me? And tell Jimmy we’ll meet up back at the hotel?”

The enforcer gives Sami a raised eyebrow but nods, leaving the room and shutting the door behind him without another word.

They’re alone, no prying eyes. No brothers, no Roman, no Paul Heyman.

Sami turns back to him, approaching slowly and sitting down on the couch next to him, so similar to the nights back in Florida, watching trash TV until late at night.

“I’d really hoped to surprise you, think I still did, but I thought it’d be in better spirits,” Sami gently puts his hand on Jey’s where it rests in his lap. “Still glad I’m here though.”

Jey can’t think through the fog in his head, caught up in the swirl of emotions and the leftover adrenaline from the match, and his eyes fall from Sami’s worried brow to the plush of his lips.

Before he knows what he’s even doing his lips are pressed to Sami’s, hands cupping Sami’s cheeks in an effort to keep him close.

It lasts just for a few moments before Jey’s brain comes back online and he realized what he’d done.

Panicked, he pulls away, casting his head down, staring holes into the floor and wishing they would swallow him.

“Fuck, Sorry, uce- SHIT, M’sorry,” Jey feels like he’d been dosed in freezing water, the urge to vomit rising in his mouth.

Another fuckup, another way he’s failed tonight. He’s hit with the need to get away, get some air and distance from whatever he just did.

He starts to stand, but is stopped by a firm hand at his elbow.

“Jey, don’t be sorry,” There’s the touch of warm fingers at his chin, so soft and gentle as they guide his head up to meet Sami’s eyes once more.

Sami opens his mouth to speak again, but closes it instead and leans in slowly to connect their lips again, running his fingers along Jey’s jaw before tangling in his hair.

It’s slow, unhurried, and so heartbreakingly sweet. It’s everything Jey’s secretly wished for on the lonely nights on the road, dreaming of when he could return home to Sami.

When they finally part, Sami rests his forehead against his own, sighing out a long breath.

“I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” He giggles, like a child caught with their hand in a candy jar.

“Why didn’t you?” Jey asks, absent-mindedly smoothing Sami’s hair with his fingers.

Sami gently shakes his head back and forth, and Jey relishes in the feeling, the intoxicating closeness.

“Was scared, I think. Didn’t know how you’d react really,”

That Jey could understand, honestly. He doesn’t know how to respond, other than that he really just wants to kiss Sami again, so he pulled their lips together desperately, groaning at the feeling when Sami deepens the motion.

“Seems like I was worried over nothing,” Sami laughs pressing a quick peck to the tip of Jey’s nose.

Jey buckles under the weight of his emotions, burying his face into Sami’s shoulder and wrapping him in a desperate embrace.

“Sorry-M’sorry, Sami,” Jey mumbles the words into the other man’s skin, tears falling and wetting the hoodie Sami has on.

Sami’s hands gently rub circles on his back, “You have nothing to be sorry for, it’s alright.”

“Couldn’t protect you, can’t do anythin’ right,” Jey’s chest heaves with a sob, shoulders shaking as Sami just holds him.

Jey couldn’t remember the last time anyone consoled him like this, aside from his twin, and even then Jimmy usually told him just to get his shit together.

After a few minutes, Jey could finally breathe and gently released Sami from the koala hold he’d had him in, Sami’s hands coming to wipe the remaining tears from his cheeks.

“Feeling better?” Sami asks gently, with no judgement.

Jey nods, feeling the exhaustion of the day settle into his bones.

“Jey, listen-“ Sami starts, keeping his warm hands on the side of Jey’s face so he can’t look away or hide. “You have nothing to apologize for, okay? I appreciate that you want to protect me, but remember when I told you we’re in this together? You don’t have to bear all that on your shoulders. I can protect myself and help you too.”

“But Roman-“

“I’m not blind, Jey. I saw what Roman did to Jimmy before, and I know how that eats at you. But you don’t have to be scared, okay? I’m not gonna let him use me against you or vice versa.”

Sami’s thumb strokes against his cheek, and he wants to believe so badly. “Still, we gotta be careful. Maybe we jus’ keep us between us for a while?”

There’s a frown on Sami’s face, “I gotta be honest here, Jey, I don’t wanna keep you a secret forever. I wanna treat you right.” He sighs, heavily. “But I understand this probably isn’t the best time.”

Jey blinks, trying to keep himself in check.

“Can’t have you payin’ for my mistakes tonight, Sami. I can’t-“ He feels panic rising in his throat again.

He’s cut off by the sensation of Sami’s lips at his forehead, right between his brows.

“Let’s not think about that now, huh?” Sami’s voice is low and soothing. “We have a lot of lost time to make up for.”

Jey feels a rush of heat to his stomach at the implication, and it fuels him to press their lips together, grasping at Sami’s neck to pull him closer, closer. Jey opens his mouth in a sigh, inviting the other man in further and relishing in the feeling of Sami’s tongue tasting along his bottom lip before diving in further to explore his mouth.

Jey angles his head a little, rubbing their noses together and pulls back just a bit, taking Sami’s lip in between his teeth and biting it playfully.

The noise the ginger makes in response goes straight to Jey’s pants, where his dick is quickly getting invested in the situation.

Jey runs his hands down to Sami’s chest, to the zipper of the hoodie he’s wearing, taking the zip in one hand and unzipping it while pushing the material off Sami’s shoulders and down his arms.

Underneath the hoodie, Sami is wearing a ribbed white tank top, one he’s had for a while based on how tight it is over the softness that’s settled on his chest and belly.

Sami’s never been a 6 pack abs kind of guy, but something about how the weight gain has settled on his frame drives Jey absolutely wild. The swell of his round little tits, kept perky by strong pectoral muscles underneath, and how they just kiss the fullness of his belly.

Jey gets up from the couch and kneels down in front of Sami, boxing him in with his arms as he swoops in to kiss the other man again.

“Missed you so much, Sami, you don’ even know,” He mumbles in between kisses. “Thought ‘bout you all the time, every night.” Jey moves to Sami’s neck, pressing little kisses to each faint freckle he finds.

Sami arches his back and neck, letting out a long sigh. “Couldn’t wait two more weeks, I bought the ticket as soon as the docs said I could.”

“M’glad,” Jey’s lips lingered at Sami’s collarbone, nipping the soft skin as he ran his hands along the bottom hem of Sami’s shirt. “Gonna take this off,”

Sami’s hands come down to his to stop him, “Jey-“

“Wanna see you, baby,” Jey moves up to Sami’s face, brushing his lips over each of Sami’s cheeks, then just ghosting over his lips.

Sami’s hands relaxed, and Jey guided both their hands in pulling the shirt off.

Jey’s mouth watered at the sight laid out before him, Sami’s round little nipples kissing the soft squish of his stomach, with a dusting of light soft hair covering all of it.

He zeroed in one nipple, taking it in his mouth and swirling his tongue around the tip, moaning around it as Sami threads his fingers into the hair on his neck. His dick is aching in his shorts, but this is about Sami now and making him feel good.

He drags his nose and licks a stripe across the mounds of Sami’s tits to pay attention to the other nipple as he smooths his hands around the sweet love handles that are a perfect size for each handful.

Sami looked so well loved and cared for and it was intoxicating knowing he’d taken of Sami this good for the last few months.

Jey’s hands travel back down to the edge of the joggers Sami wore, tugging on the elastic.

Sami’s hand stilled in Jey’s hair. “Baby, you don’t have to,”

“Wanna make you feel good,,”

Jey looks up at Sami through his thick eyelashes, rubbing his thumbs into the soft give of belly. Sami’s face is nearly red with blush and there are tears shining in his eyes as he nods, fingers tightening their grip on Jey’s hair. He tugs Jey up for another melting kiss.

Sami lifts his hips up, pushing the joggers down with one hand, taking his boxers in one motion halfway down his thighs and freeing his very hard dick.

Jey sinks back on the balls of his feet to come to eye level with Sami’s waist, touching the ginger’s hips and nudging them forward a touch, mindful of the knee injury. He dips down to press an open wide kiss to the head of Sami’s cock, eating up the loud groan that escapes his mouth.

“Gonna have to stay a lil’ quieter than that, Sami,” Jey laughed before peppering kisses down the length of his shaft, and licking back up with the full breadth of his tongue in one smooth glide.

The chances of anyone overhearing were minimal, but it was enough to send a thrill down Jey’s spine.

He takes his time, dragging his tongue around the head of Sami’s cock and learning all the places that elicit those sweet gasps and whines from the other man.

Sami’s fast breaths turn to pleas for more, and Jey obliges, taking the full length of his cock into his mouth. It’s length is just enough to stretch into his throat and the full weight of it on Jey’s tongue is intoxicating.

He swallows around Sami’s cock and takes a few slow breaths through his nose, moaning to send vibrations through the ginger’s body.

Sami’s grip on his hair is tight, just this side of painful, and it makes Jey’s dick ache. He feels precum leaking out and creating a wet spot in his underwear, and he’s hit with the thought that he might just cum from pleasuring Sami alone.

Jey sucks in and hollows his cheeks, reaching back to put his hand on Sami’s in his hair, pressing their hands and his head down further on Sami’s length, hoping that the other man gets the picture. Which he does, based on the groan he lets out and the tug on his curls that drags him back up to wrap his lips around the full pink head of Sami’s cock.

He lets Sami control his movements, setting a slow deliberate rhythm with Jey’s mouth and tongue, as Jey lets his hands wander again, dragging up over the curve of Sami’s belly and rubbing his thumbs in circles over those sweet puffy nipples.

Sami’s body hair is softer than Jey ever would have imagined, like he could curl up and take a nap right on the man’s chest and never move again.

“So fuckin’ good, Jey- feels so good,” Sami’s words spur Jey’s movements, lightly pinching on his nipples before rubbing his thumbs along the meat of his tits, watching up from below as they jiggle.

Sami’s hips are shaking, and Jey thinks maybe the other man’s knee is aching from sitting in one place for so long, but when there’s movement it’s Sami’s good leg that moves forward to the tent in his shorts, gently putting pressure against the head of his dick.

Jey’s vision whites for a moment at the sudden contact.

“Take what you need, baby, M’not gonna last long,” Sami says, and it’s all the permission Jey needs to rut his hips forward, groaning at the friction of his cock against Sami’s shin.

It’s dirty and desperate, but Jey can’t find it within himself to care.

He’s bobbing faster on Sami’s dick now, bringing his hands back down to steady Sami’s still shaking hips. It’s a heady power trip, feeling how much pleasure he’s bringing to this man that he loves so much.

That’s what this is, what his feelings have become. He loves Sami with everything he has, and there’s no going back after this.

“Jey,” Sami’s nearly whimpering, “Jey, baby- stop m’gonna-“ His fingers tug to pull Jey off of his dick, but Jey’s never been one to see something halfway through.

He takes a breath through his nose instead, pushing forward to bury his nose in Sami’s soft pubic hair, taking the full length of him into his mouth and throat.

Sami cries and its the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard, feels the twitch of his dick on his tongue and in his throat as Sami cums.

He bucks his own hips twice more and his cock spurts all over the inside of his shorts, and he’s moaning again, wringing the last drops of pleasure out of Sami before his hands push him off.

“Too much,” Sami’s breath is heavy but he’s smiling, “You’re too much babe.”

Jey licks his lips, savoring the last of the taste of Sami’s skin as he pulls the joggers back up over the man’s hips.

Sami looks down at Jey’s very much no longer tented shorts, eyes wide.

“Did you-?”

He laughs, “Like a damn high schooler, yeah.”

“Lucky for you, I got some extra pants in my bag,”

Jey stands, his knees protesting, especially doing all that after a fight. Probably not the smartest thing he’s ever done, but he can’t find it in himself to regret it.

Sami stands too, bringing him in for another kiss. He can’t believe he gets to do this now, can really have this.

Reality creeps in though as their lips part, Sami reaching back to the couch for his discarded hoodie.

“We’re gonna have to head back to the hotel soon, they’re gonna wonder where we are.”

Jey drops his head to rest on Sami’s shoulder, groaning defeatedly.

“Please tell me you got a separate room from those fools?” He asks, but he knows the answer. There’s no way he could sneak away from his brothers for a whole night. Especially not tonight.

Sami shakes his head and laughs. “Sorry, babe. Had to plan with Paul to even get in here.”

“And when do you leave?” The question hurts to ask.

“Tomorrow afternoon. I’ve got a follow up appointment I need to get to Monday morning, or you know I’d stay.”

“I know,” Their bubble of happiness is about to burst way sooner than he anticipated. “Just wish I could hold you tonight, s’all.”

He feels a warm kiss press to the top of his head, “I know- at least we can get some breakfast in the morning, huh? Some waffles? And it’s two weeks until you get a whole week off.”

The two weeks might as well be two months for all that it helps Jey right now. He pulls his head back up, stopping to give Sami one quick press of lips, that turns to two, then three. Just brushing their lips together.

“We gonna spend every single day in bed, you know that?”

Sami laughs, “I think we can make that happen.” He turns to rummage in his bag, tossing Jey a pair of shorts.

Jey grumbles, “Time to face the music I guess.”

The anxiety of losing the fight, what Roman’s reaction will be to them losing the belts, creeps back in. He can feel his shoulders tensing up already.

“Hey now, none of that.”

As Jey tugs the new shorts on, Sami is there when he gets to full height, dropping another kiss on his forehead. “I told you before, we’re in this together. No shouldering this on your own this time.”

Jey swallows, nodding his head. “Okay, Sami.”

They leave together, taking a rental back to the hotel, Jey wishing each minute were longer as he enjoys the feeling of Sami’s fingers in his own.

Two weeks. Two weeks and he can take his time with Sami. Love him the way that he deserves.

At least he’ll be away from whatever wrath Roman is about to throw at them.

----

Thinking 1 more part to deal with the fallout of Wrestlemania and let Jey worship his man the way he wants to :)

Thank you to everyone reading- it means the world to me 🤍

Happy Smackdown Night!

[gurugirl]

Hi this is the same anon that about bounty ago asked about being 23 and a virgin and going travelling.

My friend has just got engaged and the friend that I was planning to go travelling with a started saying things that make me think she doesn’t want go travelling next year and has also got a boyfriend and two of my other friends have now got boyfriends.

I feel so weird about it bc I don’t want anyone bc I want to go away and travel but at the same time I’m so scared I’ll never meet anyone. How do I even talk to boys?

Should I just lose my virginity to get it over with? I don’t know how I’ll go travelling- does anyone have tips? I just feel so weird about it all. I hate my skin and my hair and my weight so much, I think that’s a real reason I’m so awkward bc I feel so insecure about my weight.

Idk your advice really helped me for a but but I’ve started overthink again

Hi, hon! First of all, I hope that your friend who wanted to travel with you doesn't flake out for some guy. I feel like sometimes when people (especially girls for various reasons) get into relationships it changes their plans to some extent which is a shame. Staying back for a guy when she could have seen new places and things and met new people is something she will absolutely regret when she gets older. Those are the kinds of experiences you cannot replace. I'm gonna keep positive for you that she'll still want to go.

I'm also wondering if you'd still want to go if you didn't have a travel companion? Depending on where you go and how well you've planned it could still be possible for you. So consider what can be done so you can go regardless if your friend joins or not - okay? I promise you that you'll get a lot more satisfaction doing something like traveling and experiencing new places than you would if you just stayed home and hoped to meet someone. What if you meet someone on your travels? What if you don't? Either way, you'll not regret traveling - but you might regret staying back.

Now to your worries about being a virgin... I think you're focusing on that part too much. You're still young and you're supposed to be awkward and all that! There are probably other people your age that you'd never know were feeling insecure and awkward but have it just like you. We gotta stop rushing these timelines and try and relax a little. Your virginity and ability to travel are not connected. You can be a virgin and travel. You do not have to "get it over with". Have sex with someone you trust and like (when the time comes) but don't put too much stock in it or him.

As for your insecurity about your appearance - that's also something most of us deal with. I've seen the most attractive people feel insecure and less than which is wild but everyone deals with it. Sometimes you gotta fake your confidence, tell yourself you look good, smile at yourself in the mirror, and do your best not to give a fuck about what some stranger might think about you (they probably don't think anything bad anyway, most of this stuff is just in our heads). But try and turn your thoughts around by tricking yourself a little. Eventually, you'll start to believe it too. It'll change your attitude about things. When we're too insecure about ourselves we wind up being a bit selfish bc we're so focused on ourselves, what we look like, what others think of us... It's wonderful to focus on yourself but when it's through the lens of insecurity you're looking at the wrong things and it's all superficial. The more confident you are (even if you're just pretending) the more others will be drawn to you and find that you're someone they want to know bc you'll seem so much warmer suddenly.

It starts little - just you telling yourself you look good and that you're not going to worry about what someone else thinks about your body that day. Remind yourself throughout the day. Do it again the next day. After some time, your posture will get better, your smile will be more natural, and your confidence will start to seep out naturally and people will notice how nice you are and how engaging you've become.

You're never not gonna deal with insecurity so you might as well learn how to feel better about yourself despite it all.

I hope you can still travel no matter if your friend can go with you or not. Do a little research on the areas you are planning on visiting and figure out if it's safe to be a single woman going there and if not, alter the plans if you can. The only thing I can guarantee in all this is that traveling will be life-changing for you and will be worth it absolutely.

Good luck sweetie!

xoxo

[kierancampire]

I just wanna preemptively say, I feel like my messages seem a lil manipulative and shitty, but they weren't intended that way and I was going through a lot at the time

It's been 4 years now since Nathan left. 4 years of being trapped with demons and going through a repeated suffering. It was just shit after shit, my family kicked me out May 2018, Kirsty put me through hell and kicked me out March 2019, I got with Nathan in late 2019, he left me in February 2020, Covid happened, found out nan had cancer early 2020, Anthony late 2020, nan died February 2021, I moved here late 2021 and started a process of hell. Then throughout all of this a lot of shit was going on with neighbours, systems, policies, people, catfishing, stalking, fights, financial issues, so much more

I think a part of a reason I have gained weight, let my teeth rot and decay, and have otherwise neglected myself is because I want to seem undesirable, it's also easier to blame it all on those excuses of why I can't get with anyone. It's been 4 years since he left, yet I have felt no desire to date again, I haven't wanted to let anyone in or close to me again, I still can't touch my own body, and I avoid and dread so many things still, I still haven't been able to touch The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and Valentine's, especially Build-A-Bear Valentine's stuff just hurts to see still

For quite a while now I've really just stopped talking to people again, I had one friend I always spoke to even if I spoke to no one else, yet even him I have not been speaking to, and thinking on it, I blamed it all on housing stress when I moved here, but really it started with Nathan. I don't want to let him rule or dictate my life forever, but I don't exactly have a good track record of ex's, and I just don't want another Nathan, I mean, no one could do what Nathan did considering he took what I can never get back, but someone else could do similar and that's what I'm scared of

Something I haven't ever really spoken about, but during our relationship Nathan started choking me during sexual activity, either with his hand or he'd tie things around my throat. He never asked if I liked it, I didn't, he just did it one day and never stopped. I think that's why I remember that one time more vividly than the rest, because he started with him slamming me against the door by my throat, and then when he chucked me onto the bed and jumped on top of me so I couldn't escape, it was like he was suffocating my whole body instead of just my throat

My first sexual assault was by Dave, and initially it hurt and upset me, but it wasn't overtly traumatising or felt like it took a lot from me, it was just a shitty thing that sucked. But since Nathan and his repeated SA, and this big consent issue with full penetration, Dave's has always suddenly felt much worse. Another thing I have spoken little of, if at all, when Nathan suddenly sprung this break up on me, knowing how violated he made me feel, he asked if we could have sex one final time before he left, then asked again when I said no the first time. Even after leaving me and hurting me so extensively, he wanted to use my body one final time for his own pleasure

It's been 4 years to the day, yet it doesn't feel like it, it all feels so much more recent than 4 years. I do hope one day I don't keep suffering under this all, reliving it, feeling their parts in my hands, the anger, the shame, the disgust, the betrayal. But at the moment, it's all just still what I feel. I have seen he's got with someone new and all I want to do is scream at that person to run and tell them to leave him, but I know that even if I contacted this new boyfriend, he wouldn't listen. I just hope Nathan doesn't do to him what he did to me. He's clearly moved on, I have no idea if he even thinks of me still, if he gets off on the memories of violating me, or if he just forgot me and has moved on to his next target. But it's been 4 years since he left and I can still not let go or move on from what he did, and I think at least a part of me never will, he took a part of me that's frozen in time. I've been struggling with a depression phase again recently, and I think it's just cause around this time I was violated one final time, in a way that I can't even say was rape cause technically I consented to it, then he left, and it's still hard for me. Then in roughly 3 weeks it will be 3 years since nan died, my first real major death

[hotsexydorks]

🌀 Hypno Plot Ideas 🌀

Generic | Incest | Cheating/Cuck | Hypno  

“Mister Harrison?” The man looked up at him acknowledging his voice but nothing else. “Good the hypnosis worked.. now strip for me.”

“Who knew that catching boys on this internet BnB thing would be so easy. Shame he’s only staying for a few days.”

There he was, the once cocky alpha breeding stud now a cum hungry muscle pussy. Begging for men to find him and fuck his pussy whenever they liked.

Remember, always wear sun cream - cum

“Keep listening to my voice, relax, fall deeper and deeper into your sleep.”

When Master said to always have a cock in my mouth but there’s no one here.

“Come on boy, time for breakfast!”

Every night just like the genie said, your roommate would walk in. Unknowingly get on his knees and suck your cock. You could get used to this, or maybe more.

Once, he was the top dog of campus, the hot cock straight guy that showed off and bragged about how much pussy he pulled. Now here he is, pumping away at his loose hole with a thick dildo, live streaming and showing the world how much of a cock slut he is.

“Look at him, the dumb slut can’t even stay still for cum, he’s that much of a fucking useless dump around cock now.”

“Coach, I have an alteration suggestion to the team's uniform. What do you think?”

It had been a few months since the major’s son went missing. He was a good kid and everyone knew him, and got on with everyone. The whole town searched for days but no one found anything. He just vanished. Now, no one could recognise him as he turned up across different forums. Mindless hanging in a sling, about to be the centre of attention for a 24 hour live stream of sex and depravity.

“Hello Sir, I’m here to talk to you about the recent notice I received about my job termination. I would like to present an item to help you change your mind on that decision.”

“Time to present for your weekly performance inspection. We can’t have the team being damaged cause a player isn’t pulling their weight.”

“What did I say? One wish and your worries that guy at work would all disappear. Now, why don’t you send him a nice picture, show him how much of a good boy you want to be for him. Make sure you show him how smooth and tight your hole is too.”

“That’s it, reach back and spread those cheeks. You want to see the head priest you’ve got to go through all of us first, better go two at a time if you want to see him before this week is over.”

“Here, Gentlemen, we have subject #6. As you can see he is a smooth jock, hard and very tight. All hypnoed out and waiting for you to use him. With an added bonus, the highest bidder can have him addicted to their cock.”

“That’s it boy, keep jerking off, keep cumming, keep growing. The more you cum the bigger you’ll get. Can you feel how big you’ve already gotten?”

“So how does your first time taking dick feel, straight boy?”

“Come on slut , keep training that hole and that body. This is combining your two workouts, you should be thanking me slave.”

“That’s it, just relax to the sounds of my voice. You want to make your body perfect for your master.”

“Good afternoon gentlemen. Welcome to detention.”

“Good Morning Mr.Smith. I’m sure you’re wondering where you are, all you need to know is that this is the first day of your new life. You are no longer a blue collar worker, you are now a brand new sex slave.. Or you will be once we train you up.”

“Why is it crying?” “Well we thought that letting our product keep some of their sanity would be a new feature for those Masters who like a trained body but a struggling mind.” “We’ll take it.”

“Dude, how many of those unnamed sex drugs did you take!? You know there’s one going around that gives people cum for brains... Oh well, guess there’s no point in a hungry slut going to waste.”

“Maybe three drops of this fag maker drug was too much... or maybe it was just the right amount.”

A few of the ‘special’ beers, that’s all it took for the straight boys to be not so straight.

“Fu-- fuck yeah! Fuck me dude!” The best part about hypnotising any volunteer you wanted into a massive slut was you could do it over and over again.

“Mr.Jones...I know that tutoring classes are now all online but class still calls for you to wear... clothing..” “Sir I am wearing clothes, see. Get a good look so you don’t try call me out again.” 

[chokemetopme]

(last update: 10/02/2023)

used to be @/topmechokeme, got nuked for unknown reasons

hi!! if you've found your way here, please make sure you are at least 18 years old and leave otherwise. minors and people sexually interacting with minors aren't welcome here. blogs without age in their bio or pinned posts will be blocked. if you're a man, make sure to behave - i don't sexually interact with men.

i am an enby lesbian and this is my kinky blog!! i am strictly submissive. everything here is fantasy or, in some occasions, a description of consensual sexual acts. all my posts are about adult human beings only. consent always comes first and so does safety, never engage in sexual acts without clear enthusiastic consent from everyone involved.

all 'cocks' and 'dicks' mentioned belong to women or nonbinary people and can be either a body part or a sex toy depending on the context. all of my fantasies are about women and nonbinary people.

things i'm currently into:

degradation: being called all sorts of mean names (especially those degrading my intelligence and those slut shaming), being talked down to, being laughed at

praise

dumbification

cnc (consensual non-consent) (always tagged as #tw cnc): being forced, being taken advantage of, somno, being whored out, being kidnapped, r*peplay

objectification: being casually objectified, groped, being treated like a toy or a sex doll

being filmed or livestreamed

gloryhole and its variations

pet play: mostly as a puppy, open to being a deergirl; leashes, fluffy ears, tail plugs, cages, eating cum out of a bowl

shock collars

giving oral

breath play: especially during giving oral

edging & orgasm denial

anal: especially if it's uncomfortable

group sex: with multiple dommes or multiple subs, gangbangs

monsterfucking: tentacles and weird cocks are very welcome

things to absolutely be avoided here:

misogyny, transphobia, homophobia and 'corrective rape'; mentions of animals, minors or men in sexual situations; any kind of body shaming and being called ugly, injuries, snuff, piss, scat, vomit, blood, chastity belts, ruined orgasms

i won't block you for calling me a 'princess' or a 'bimbo' but i do not vibe with these words

please do not add any of my turn-offs to reblogs of my posts

i love love love getting asks and playing publicly here!! please send:

degrading messages

praise

your fantasies involving me<3

messages denying me an orgasm/messages allowing me to have one

AFTERCARE after the play is over - just tell me to get some water or just something nice; it can be the smallest thing but it really helps!!

you can also just say something nice💚

it's not mandatory but i do appreciate when you make your gender known<3

DNI if:

you're a minor

you're racist, homophobic, transphobic, ableist, misogynistic or fatphobic

you're a male cishet dom

you have a misogyny, corrective rape, misgendering or weight-related kink

#textpost - my textposts

#asks - the asks

#ask me harder - ask games

[papirouge]

We also gotta consider the courts can be heavily biased in favor of abusive men and rapists as well, and neglectful and sexist police officers can often revictimize survivors through victim blaming and neglect (my friend had her case dismissed because the boy was related to the cop) and we both know of several rapists who got off with a slap on the wrist (Brock turner). Obviously the long term solution should be fixing the justice system so this doesn't happen but (pt 1/2)

Ok but by your own logic, by encouraging women to retaliate and kill their abuser, it's putting women in a position of vulnerability by shoving them into the grip of the "sexist" justice system. I don't have the solution to fix the justice system, but pushing women to do things that would make them having to defend themselves against it is not reasonable. If anything, women should do everything they can to NEVER have to face the justice system altogether.

That being said, the justice system is flawed but it doesn't mean it protects only male predator. Yes scrotes are annoying to pretend caring about sex abuse only when males are victims, but there are several cases of women abusers who got away with what they did. So feminists asking like women the only victims of the screwed justice system is dishonest. The justice system has a problem with handling sexual abuse seriously, regardless of the gender.

That's why it is so important to go to the root of the problem. Educating women to nope out of toxic relationships, defend female spaces providing the help to those who escaped, help their making wiser dating choices, etc... That's why I'll never understand radfem hating on Female Dating Strategy when this platform is just providing one type of solution available for women (those who still want to date and not live a life of celibacy ). Regardless what terminally online separatists say, both separatism AND FDS can coexist to provide different solutions to different type of women who all seek to navigate through life and get the best out a system unfavorable to them.

And I don't understand why you're feeling like outweighing the pain of families of someone victim of abuse, to the one of the person who committed the abuse. The justice system is supposed to pull out sentences on the INDIVIDUAL level. (unless they are proved guilty of being actively complicit in the crime/having the capacity of preventing the crime from happening) Criminals families don't owe anything to anyone, and they shouldn't have to bear an additional weight beside the shame of having a criminal as their member.

It's funny you're talking about victim blaming about abused women....but have no issue victim blaming criminals families (implying they are deserving of more pain than the abused person family....) 🤔 Criminals DO compartmentalize and might come off as totally normal person to family members, coworkers, friends.... This myth of abusers being straight in the face menace to society is very harmful & counterproductive imo