#but I also have fomo and want to keep track of what other people are posting

[ase-trollplays]

I'm crazy bored and craving interaction, but none of my little bitches have ideas for an open. X_X

[p-redux]

So, more info from Hyrox Glasgow 2024! Again, thanks Team for all the DMs, I really appreciate you! ❤️

Reminder of what I posted yesterday.

And

So, today, I get this video of Sarah Holden competing at Hyrox Glasgow, and you can CLEARLY hear Sam Heughan cheering her on. Sam's voice is at the very end. At the beginning, you hear a man with a thick Glasgow accent pronouncing Sarah's name Serah. That's NOT Sam. There's also a woman's voice. And at the END of the video, you can hear Sam's unmistakable "C'mon, Sarah!" This was shared by one of the Team and I saved it to my YouTube Channel. Enjoy!👇

I also received this DM with additional info. 👇 Posted with permission.

Here's the pic where Sam is tagged. 👇

And Sarah posting she got FOMO aka Fear Of Missing Out and spontaneously competed today in the women's open race. 👇 She definitely matches Sam's energy level! I'm tired just looking at her. 😊

Anyhoooo, I also got some conflicting info regarding whether Sam competed yesterday after all. I was alerted to this Tweet. 👇

And then I received this DM from someone I've never talked to. 👇

It's all very confusing. On the one hand, it is weird that if Sam competed, he never posted anything on his own IG. On the other hand, Hyrox DID post his results as if he DID compete yesterday. 👇

If Sam decided to not compete and wanted to give his slot to someone else, why wouldn't Hyrox be able to substitute the other man's name? Everything is computerized, so I don't see why they couldn't have made the change easily. Also, isn't it fraudulent to post results with Sam Heughan's name if he wasn't the one competing?

On the flip side, if Sam didn't actually compete, then he literally went to Hyrox to watch Sarah! Those saying "No, he went to watch his friend, Valbo. who also competed." Yeah, except Valbo didn't compete until 6:00 PM yesterday, and Sam was there at 12:00 PM, when the women's competitions started. Literally RIGHT THERE where Sarah was competing. 👇

No reason for Sam to be there 6 HOURS before Valbo was competing if he only went to support Valbo. 🤷‍♀️

I ran out of room to post pics since Tumblr limits to 10 pics, but I also got a DM saying Sam got a bunch of new Instagram follows who are Sarah Holden fans. That leads me to think they went to follow him because they saw him with Sarah at Hyrox.

So, that's it for now. I'm in the process of vetting someone from the Glasgowish area who approached me with some Sam and Sarah info. If she and the info check out, then I'll post it.

PS. I'm hearing from people that my usual haters and assorted newish haters are gnashing their teeth about my #samarah posts...same as it ever was. This has happened any time I've ever posted about Sam possibly dating someone. If you look at my track record for the last 10 years, my info has been at least 90% accurate. No one in the Outlander fandom would have known about Cait and Tony, and Sam and Cody, Abbie, Mackenzie, etc if not for my INSIDER source info, and me posting it FIRST. Facts, people. So, the hate makes no never mind to me. I keep doing me. I'm here for those who want the info. If that's not you, go somewhere else. Simple as that.

Oh, one more thing...the LIE that I have a restraining order against me from Sam resurfaced in my Inbox. Let's use our brains once in our lifetime, shall we? If I had a restraining order or a cease and desist, I wouldn't still be here, now would I? Doh. 🤦‍♀️ My blog is just like any celebrity news blog. It's called freedom of speech, peeps. And in the USA people have died to protect this right. That's all, folks.

[ameliapples]

I see people on other platforms talking about cohost going down and I generally see the same few complaints being trotted out over and over as the reasons why it failed and was doomed to fail from the start. "It kept logging me out", "there was no app", "my timeline was always dead", "I got so little engagement", "I had to wait how long before I could post??". It's the stuff people have complained about with the platform forever, and while I think these complaints are generally a bit silly, they do arrive at what's probably the real reason we're all mourning the impending death of eggbug without realizing it.

A big part of what made cohost so different from other social media platforms is that it was the only platform where you had to actually want to be there. Every other platform is basically designed to hold you at gunpoint and force your attention and engagement 24/7. The gun in this situation being mostly fomo - everything is happening so rapidly, there's so much to keep track of, what if you miss something? what if it's something really big and you don't tweet about it within the first 5 minutes of it happening? what if you miss the next Main Character? there's a new one every day and they're forgotten as quickly as they arrive, but a month from now someone's gonna bring it up as a joke and you won't get it and you'll look lame and cringe! you don't want to look Lame and also Cringe, do you?

cohost never felt that way. If you were there, it was because you genuinely wanted to be. The site was designed to ensure that, even. You had to wait about a week after you made an account to ensure you weren't a spam bot before you could post at all. Once you could post, there was no algorithm. None. Nothing was fed into your feed that wasn't directly posted to a tag you follow or a person you follow. If you wanted to see something outside of that, you'd have to do the legwork browsing tags yourself. For budgetary reasons, there was never an app, so you had to either learn to set up a shortcut icon on your phone or else open it manually in a browser. It also logged you out every 30 days as a privacy and security measure. You had to want to jump through all these hoops to use cohost.

And what did you get for doing the effort? Peace. A social media environment that didn't feel like you were constantly stood in the center of Time Square with all the noise and marquees and heckling voices focused directly at you at all times. It didn't try to be a news site, or an advertising platform. No algorithm meant you only got what you actively chose to see, and nothing more. You could say in your head "lemme check cohost real quick", and you could be up-to-date on your timeline in under 5 minutes. It was a place you would willingly go to check in on friends or look at cool art or play around with html like it was 2004 again, not get sucked into for hours doom scrolling. Because there was no algorithm, no push for engagement, no numbers that publicly went up, no one was competing for attention or clout. No one I ever met on cohost was immediately antagonistic, or rude, or trying to dunk someone. People were chill, FRIENDLY even, in a way I have never seen on twitter or tumblr even back in "the good ol days". The adversarial, cliquey, petty nonsense we all expect from social media was almost entirely absent. It was peaceful, quiet. It was the only social media platform I've used to not give me anxiety, or a migraine.

So of course it fell apart. We live in a world where things require money to simply exist, and cohost was designed basically not to make any by virtue of having virtues. It refused to advertise, sell user data in any way, open a weird shop where you can put microscopic pngs next to your name, or force people's worst impulses in order to keep them on the site for as long as possible. It ran off merch purchases and cohost plus, which was meant to give you premium features but never got the chance to do much more than upping your file size limit on uploads. It was essentially a $5 a month donation. It wasn't enough, clearly.

So now it's going, but I don't really think saying it "failed" is right. If anything, it's made it clear what a failure the rest of the social media ecosystem is. Usually when a platform is dying, or looks to be dying (in the case of twitter, or tumblr post 2018), people immediately make plans to jump ship to a new one. But upon hearing that cohost was shutting down, my reaction, as well as that of a pretty large portion of the user base, was that we'd rather spend time on other things. Cohost was so different an atmosphere it seems to have had a healing property on people who used it. It wasn't perfect, moderation was spotty at times due to the limited staff, people had their blind spots and biases they sometimes struggled to work through. But it was better than what we've grown to expect. It made you realize how tiring the rest of the internet has become, and that you don't need to deal with it. You can better spend that time, doing things you enjoy with people you enjoy. Maybe even outside, if you can muster it. You might even meet some cool people out there, wearing cool patches, eulogizing a cool little website, with a funny lil bug shaped like an egg.

[oldguy56-world]

The Weight

'Take a load off Fanny'

Deep meaning to those words this time of year. If you can raise your right arm if you put on a few pounds over the past several weeks please do so. If you didn't raise your arm do it anyway and watch the underside of your arm. If it is still moving a couple of seconds later you are fooling yourself. Writing this week's blog is taking a little longer because I have fat finger syndrome. (This is a real thing. You can find details on my website www.theyboughtit.ca)

Yes I put on a few extra lb's but it appears to be only on my fingers. If you see me about town and notice I am wearing track pants a lot it is because they are just so comfortable. No other reason. If it looks like I am smuggling potatoes in the back pockets maybe I am. Please mind your own business.

There are many reasons we put on extra weight. Here are a few:

All your friends are overindulging and in this age of FOMO we all want to be part of everything.

Everyone wants you to look worse than they do so they make sure to load you up.

The goodies are there and we are weak.

You can just watch others eat but what is the fun in that.

So how do we avoid this annual dilemma? Is the agony we put ourselves through from Jan-Mar to get back to our normal weight worth those fleeting moments of personal satisfaction in December? Here are some tips for next year, as this year it is much too late. The good news is that 2024 is a leap year so there is both more time to purge those pounds and prepare for Christmas 2024. Aren't leap years fun?

Don't hang out with younger people that can eat anything and never gain an ounce. Not only will it keep your weight down but it helps keep homicidal thoughts out of your head.

Don't socialize with older heavy people because they just don't care. Avoid getting sucked into their attitudes and life style.

Never visit that relative (or friend, and we all have at least one) that is a phenomenal baker. These are dangerous people and possibly minions of Satan.

Do not go to any special Christmas buffets. This is a trap hoping you will justify eating five plates of food because of the season. Also avoid restaurants that offer 'endless' or 'bottomless' fries. If you don't think these are a problem visit any McDonald's and count the skinny people. Or try to count them if you can find one.

If you visit someone for Christmas supper and you arrive at 4:00 to find they have 32 different snacks out to 'tide you over' just shoot yourself in the foot so you can immediately go to the hospital and save the aggravation of months of working out later on.

Do not go to Bulk Barn without taking your own measured containers. If you go with their bags be prepared to face the consequences. The name Bulk Barn does not refer to how they merchandise their goods, it refers to what customers should expect happens to them if they go often enough.

I have to go now. Still 2 hours of rigorous workout left for today.

THOUGHT OF THE WEEK: We become what we do.

[chipotle]

How much of yourself do you put online?

It’s as much of an age-old question as anything of the internet age is, but I think about it every few years. Slapping up a web page full of personal thoughts in 1999 didn’t carry the same weight that it does in 2024; employers, even ones literally in the internet space, didn’t necessarily do a web search on your name to see what came up. Now, though, I don’t know. Now everyone does that kind of search. And, as someone who’s been conducting an unsuccessful, albeit woefully low-key, job hunt in 2024, it’s hard not to ask if what I have online at this point is working against me with more skittish employers. Even before I wrote about conservatives being snowflakes, it wasn’t exactly hard to suss out my left-wing politics, and I’ve been vocally skeptical of generative AI. In a moment where tech companies madly chase AI in either a sincere belief it’s going to change everything or mere FOMO that it might, vocal AI skepticism might be a career-limiting move—and in a moment where alt-right techbros cow companies into walking back DEI efforts, merely noting my pronouns at all, let alone noting them as “he/they”, might also be one. (“What kind of woke beta cuck uses pronouns?” Anyone who speaks English, you stupid motherfucker.) (Also, cursing in my blog might be a career-limiting move.) And yet, I don’t know. Do I want to frantically dash around the internet, tearing down anything that might give a prospective employer the heebie-jeebies about me? Is that even possible? While I’ve never reached “internet famous” status, I’ve posted lots of stuff in lots of places. When I was more actively doing tech blogging at Coyote Tracks, it got linked to by other blogs often enough that I used to joke that while you’re probably not reading me, somebody you’re reading probably is. There is an alternate universe in which I figured out how to monetize that. And, well, while I don’t advertise being a furry, I’ve been writing furry fiction for decades and have been guest of honor at more than one furry con. One does not have to possess mad internet sleuthing skills to put two and two together. Frankly, I’m always amazed when I find people I grew up with, especially members of the Original Internet Nerd cohort, have next to no footprint online. The one whose LinkedIn includes “Futurist at the Center for 21st Century Teaching Excellence” you’d kind of expect to have, I don’t know, a low-effort Substack, if not a YouTube channel, right? If you can tell someone your job title is “futurist” and keep a straight face, I’m pretty sure they’re legally required to give you a TED Talk. But apart from that LinkedIn, there’s basically nothing out there about them, and that’s true for the majority of other folks I knew in that place at that time. Does that help with job hunts? Maybe. On the other hand, maybe it hurts. It’s my understanding the former futurist’s LinkedIn is long out of date, and they struggled to find work for years before moving into non-tech fields. I can’t say that actually being, you know, present on the internet might have helped if they’d wanted to stay in tech, but I wonder. I made the shift to tech writing largely because of my loudmouth tech blog, when Joey Zwicker at RethinkDB came across it and thought, “we should talk to them about our new tech writing position.” Of course, I don’t know that they did want to stay in tech. If they didn’t, I couldn’t blame them. In any case, I don’t think erasing my digital footprint is either possible or worth it. Anyone who reads what I write and decides they can’t work with someone like me is probably right. (originally published at Coyote Tracks)

[evanvanness]

My contrarian ETF take

Everyone is excited about ETFs in cryptoland. People think BTC and then ETH ETFs will be approved.

Eth has run up about 33%

Our favorite memecoin has run up about 66%

I've given this take multiple places, so let me put it down on paper so you can make fun of me when I'm wrong. The odds say that I'm likely wrong.

Yet, I firmly declare myself more bearish than the consensus on ETFs. In all aspects.

I'm less convinced than everyone that a spot BTC ETF will be approved.

First, what did the appellate court actually say?

The SEC "failed to adequately explain" and had no "coherent explanation"

What is the law? Per the opinion:

All the SEC has to show is that their decision was not "arbitrary, capricious" and that they "explained the decision."

The Bloomberg reporters say the ETP is happening. They cite all the staff work that is being done, and the fact that the applications are being amended, and the fact that they're all being set for decision on the same day. These are all good fact patterns for an approval.

To be clear, the appellate court's decision is scathingly against the SEC. It's a black mark for Gensler. They set the bar as high as they possibly could. But the bar is not that high, because they can't "substitute [their] policy judgements" by law.

So if you were Gary Gensler and you wanted to reject the ETPs, you'd probably have to do lots of staff work to show that the rejection is not arbitrary and to explain why. In order to reject the ETFs, all you need is your vote, the other 2 Dem commissioners (the 2 Republican commissioners have long dissented) and a detailed explanation of how spot and futures ETFs are different.

The court is relatively handtied if Gensler goes this route.

---

Now to be clear, the way things often work in media is that the reporters are talking directly to people like Gensler or staff, whether off the record or at parties or at the bar at Old Ebbitt's (long a White House/Treasury*** staffer haunt)

So it's definitely possible that approval is a lock, especially since Gensler has long been clear that he favors Bitcoin.

People are acting like it's a lock. I agree chances are probably over 50%, but I don't think it's a lock.

2. It's already priced in.

Everyone is super convinced that the approval is coming. Price has run up a lot. Anecdotally, I know of plenty of people buying over the last couple months "to get in before the ETF" and momentum trading pre-approval.

3. Flows likely to disappoint

We already have futures ETFs for both BTC and ETH. The ETH futures ETFs went live about 3 months ago, and the flows were extremely underwhelming.

Who fundamentally needs a spot ETF to buy?

Sure there are reasons (tracking risk) why spot ETFs are better than futures ETF. Spot should track closer to the underlying. There's no contango or backwardation.

But almost everyone who wants BTC exposure at this point has it. "The institutions" have been around for cycles. Perhaps there are some retirement accounts from middle class Americans who will buy. But are those people rushing to buy?

The argument is basically that financial advisors can pitch it. Which may be true, but financial advisors' principal concern is keeping your business, not maximizing returns. Advocating for a hypervolatile asset is something that tends to get them in trouble, even if the return profile is positive, because most people do not want to see a big loss in any part of their portfolio.

It also seems possible to me that spot ETFs provide meaningful flows over the long-run but not in the short-run.

4. Loss of narrative

I've lost count of how many times over the last decade people have told me that they were buying "because the ETF is around the corner." Whenever I unfortunately end up at general crypto events, I always hear the memecoiners trying to FOMO new retail money into BTC using the ETF approval ("you're frontrunning the intstitutions!").

Look it's anecdotal, but ETFs have been heavily promoted for a long time, especially in the Bitcoin community. Most of these folks didn't sell when the ETF got rejected...because they knew it would come eventually.

My contention is this spot ETF is more valuable to BTC as "it's coming soon" than having actually come.

tldr: While probably likely, I am less convinced that ETF approval is guaranteed. Any decision is likely bearish for the market short-term.

***To be clear, the SEC is on the other side of town next to Union Station but the SEC is under Treasury, relatively speaking.

UPDATE 12/21: Took less than 24 hours to shoot holes in my bearishness that Gensler will continue blocking. The SEC had a conference call today where they apparently told people that the ETFs were going to get approved if they did them the way the SEC wants.

[david-akintunde]

10 Tips To Boost Your Email Open Rates

Here is a simple talisman for success if you’re an email marketer — higher email open rates mean more conversions. Sounds obvious? Even then, many organizations don’t end up writing emails that subscribers want to open. A study by MailChimp found that email open rates are just at 21.33% across all industries.

In a quick glance, this figure looks ok. But is it really? Suppose you have an email list comprising a whopping 15,000 subscribers. With a 21.33% conversion rate, only a mere 3199 leads are ever going to see your emails, and fewer will take any action.

Remember, there comes a point, when it doesn’t matter how extensive your email list is, but how many prospects within that list open your emails. If within the same list of 15,000 subscribers, your open rates go up to 50%, you end up with 7500 leads engaging with your pitch.

So, how do you get here? By following these 10 hacks that are sure to improve your email open rates:

1. Don’t Forget to Segment your Email List

Without email list segmentation, you cannot personalize your emails. While you can categorize your email list under parameters most relevant to you, try these three segments for starters.

Segment based on:

Demography

Challenges and pain points

Like and dislikes

2. Get your Subject Line Right

Your subject line alone is what encourages prospects to open your email. It also helps form your brand’s first impression. So, craft it well! How?

Personalize it for your target audience. Write more than one subject sentence for, say, different age groups, even if the product you’re pitching is the same.

Hold back on using too many punctuations like exclamation marks. You’d be surprised how commonly marketers use more than one exclamation point in subject lines for emphasis. Choose to emphasize with your words instead.

Keep it concise and avoid vagueness.

Draft it in the form of a question, if you can.

Use powerful words and phrases. These stir emotion and arouse curiosity. For example, the image below uses a power word like “sanity-saving.”

Source: Smart Blogger

3. Get your Email Timing Right

Remember, leads will read your emails at different times in different parts of the world. Some will read them late at night, while others will do so in the morning. Leverage whichever email automation tool you use to track the time most of your prospects read your emails.

Once you have an optimal time, send emails accordingly to boost open as well as click-through rates. Also, as a general rule of thumb, avoid sending marketing emails over weekends. Several studies have now revealed that weekends are the most inopportune time to send promotional communication.

4. Get your Email Frequency Right

Nobody, and that even includes you wants their inbox to be bombarded with too many promotional emails from one brand. Not only does this single-handedly bring down your open rates, but the prospect can blacklist you or mark you as spam.

Simply put, strike the right balance with your audience. Generally, sending emails twice or thrice and no more makes for a healthy frequency that doesn’t annoy prospects.

5. Re-engage with the Dormant Prospects

All email lists have prospects who haven’t opened promotional emails from certain brands in months. Your list is likely no different. Weed them out! And scout for new prospects.

But, before identifying and deleting them from your email list, make sure to draft and deploy a re-engagement campaign. Maybe, this campaign contains time-limited offers or personalized deals to re-engage passive leads.

6. Send Emails using an Official Email ID

No matter how small your business is at this point, don’t use your Gmail or Hotmail ids to send out marketing communication. Such a practice will likely land you in the prospect’s junk pile. Use a domain email address that carries your brand name to stay out of spam filters and boost your open rates.

7. Ensure a High Deliverability Rate

Unfortunately, over 20% of marketing emails don’t land up in your prospects’ inboxes. These emails bounce because of:

Temporary server issues on both ends

Sending emails to abandoned or obsolete email ids

Prospects who accidentally blacklist you

Upping your deliverability rate will automatically boost open rates. You can do this by:

Sending reminder emails requesting your subscribers to whitelist you.

Confirm if a prospect has willingly subscribed to your list by asking them to click on a link sent to their inbox.

8. Avoid using Certain Words in Email Subject Line and Body

Stay away from phrases and words that make your email seem less authentic. For instance, “Urgent,” “free stuff for you,” “you have won,” and several others. Think of these phrases similar to swear words in email marketing.

9. Send the Same Email Once More

Sometimes your prospects want to open your email, but they simply forget or get distracted. And, once they do, they won’t revisit your email. To avoid this situation, resend the same email to subscribers who didn’t open your first email.

Don’t worry about being too intrusive here. You’d be happy to know that this is not an uncommon practice used by marketers to boost their open rates.

10. Don’t only Send Promotional Content

Sure, the ultimate goal for your brand is to sell its wares, but this doesn’t mean all your emails must carry a sales pitch. Share informational or educational content to make your email campaigns more engaging. Help them gain light on their challenges through blogs, case studies, etc. When you send a mixed bag of email content, you are more likely to increase your open rates.

Conclusion

With these 10 tips, you can undoubtedly experience higher open rates, eventually translating into more conversions. As for subscribers who, even after all the attempts, don’t open your emails, it’s best to let them go! After all, not all subscribers turn into qualified leads, and that’s ok.

Three Tips For Writing Marketing Email Subject Lines People Actually Want To Open

Sales, marketing and branding expert. CEO of GoPromotional, distributor of promotional products with a focus on online business development.

When was the last time you sent an email? Did you know that, according to Statista, roughly 306 billion emails were estimated to have been sent and received every single day in 2020? There are only about 7.7 billion people on Earth. Let that sink in. Now, ask yourself this: How many of the emails you receive every day do you actually read? More specifically, how many of the promotional emails you receive do you open at all?

With all the benefits of the information age, it’s important to remember that we’re utterly swamped with information to an extent we’ve never experienced before. So if you want to get through to people — if you’re an e-marketer whose goal is to reach as many targets as possible via mass emails — you’ll have to put in some thought and get creative. This is a game of subject lines, and your job is to master it by crafting engaging, inviting, tempting and even daring email subject lines that will grab attention — even if it’s just long enough for a click.

The fear of missing out is your ally.

FOMO is real, and it’s powerful. For the uninitiated, “FOMO” stands for “fear of missing out,” and while it may be a behavioral trend brought about by our rapidly developing internet infrastructure, it is a valuable marketing tool. No matter what you’re missing — a new blow dryer, a different kind of juice or a wedding — the point is that you’re missing something. Maybe you just don’t know about it yet.

FOMO will be of great use to you as you draft up effective subject lines. Don’t just stop with basic additions such as “act fast,” “for a limited time” or “while supplies last.” Go all the way and use numbers. What makes you want to move faster: “while supplies last” or “three hours left?” The fewer details, the better. This is all about getting your target to open the email. Don’t worry about telling them what ends in three hours. Let them find out for themselves.

Less is sometimes more.

We’re all busy. Nobody has time to read your spiel. Yes, that even includes your 10-word subject line. How many of the hundred emails you received today had 10 words in their subject lines? It adds up, and, at some point, it just looks like alphabet soup. Crafting an email subject line is all about visuals. In my experience, a short, quippy subject line can catch the eye of someone looking at their email inbox because it helps break up the sea of text.

Consider shortening a subject line such as “New jeans from Lucky Brand, Calvin Klein, Collection by Michael Strahan and more” to something more like, “Lucky. Calvin. Strahan.” You can call it a laconic method if you want, but when you treat every word like it’s a scarce commodity, they instantly appear more important.

Laugh it up.

I think we can all agree that email is no longer the stuffy, daunting, formal affair it may have once been. Email is something we do without even thinking. It’s on our phones. It’s how we confirm toothpaste orders. It’s like socks: totally ubiquitous. And consider this: More and more, your target audience is made up of people who weren’t even born before email was invented. These consumers grew up in the beginnings of a post-advertising era, when I believe traditional advertising began to lose its grip. They know a promotional email when they see one.

The solution? Laugh it up. Be a little self-aware. I’ve found that millennials and Generation Z pick up on self-awareness, and they appreciate it. Make fun of yourself a little; it can’t hurt. Switch out your stock enthusiasm for deadpan humor. Be honest. Instead of, “This week’s top picks just for you,” for example, you could try, “We want your money.” The content matters, but what matters more is getting your target interested.

Remember, the meat and potatoes are in the body of your email, but the subject is your alluring dessert. You can have dessert before dinner — as long as you eat.

Forbes Business Council is the foremost growth and networking organization for business owners and leaders. Do I qualify?

Your Email Marketing Is Destined To Fail Without These 3 Essentials

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

Think email marketing is all spam? Think again! In a world where marketing pitches come at us from all angles and on every device, email marketing has held steady as the favored channel for consumers. When used well, this platform can help you attract, convert, close and delight your buyers. Don’t underestimate it — your company’s email strategy can make or break you.

When it comes to building a successful email-marketing strategy, there are three specific elements that will help you achieve your business goals or move you further away from them, depending on how well you use them.

Let’s take a closer look at each of them.

1. Frequency

Nobody wants to get ten emails a day from a subscription. It doesn’t matter if the content is brilliant, useful or undeniably accurate. Your leads will get annoyed if you send them too much information. Even though they might read it (with some luck), at some point, they’ll feel bothered and eventually click the unsubscribe button.

Avoid losing contacts by not only asking their desired frequency to get your emails, but also by relying on your metrics. Don’t pay too much attention to your open rate alone — look closely at your click-through rate too. This will indicate how interested your leads are and how often they take action to prove it.

While every industry and situation is different, a good place to start with email-marketing cadence is about once per week. This establishes a relationship with your subscribers that can turn into a habit-forming routine. Being too timid about frequency can lead to a sporadic cadence that will end up irritating recipients. If you wait too long between emails, even opt-in subscribers may report you for spam — simply because you’ve let them forget all about you!

2. Relevance

While subscribers may certainly become frustrated by the frequency of your emails, they are more likely to become annoyed if your content is not relevant to their interests and needs.

Relevance is a tricky concept because it depends on many factors like the consumer’s knowledge level, his or her stage in the buyer’s journey and good timing. You must know your audience in order to understand what type of content they want.

Specifically, you need to know what they want from you, which is often dictated by where they are in the buyer’s journey. Are they ready to buy? Are they trying to get valuable information? Are they looking to solve a problem? Are you able to solve that problem?

In every industry, there are two types of buyers: “now” buyers, who are progressing down the purchase funnel, and future buyers, who have no interest in or need for your product currently, but may down the road. For future buyers, the relevance of your content is what’s most important to them; it’s what builds the brand trust that will bring them back to you when they are ready to buy.

Finally, timing is everything. Relevance is about getting the right content to the right person at the right time.

3. Action

We receive emails basically everywhere — at home, work and while on the go. When receiving an email, we may take a look at it immediately, but sometimes it requires further action like submitting a form, watching a video or visiting a website. Try to reduce or streamline required actions in order to make it easy for contacts to follow through at any time of day.

First and foremost, make your offers simple. Your buyers don’t like to be given too many choices; when they are, they often won’t buy anything at all. Even in the physical world, this is the case. In the famous “jam study” by Columbia Business School Professor Sheena Iyengar, for example, she set out two tasting booths for a brand of jam. One table offered six flavors to choose from; the other offered 24.

While the tasting booth with 24 flavors attracted more people, the booth with six flavors sold much more jam — 30% of those who stopped at the booth bought a jar, compared to just 3% of those who stopped at the table with 24 varieties. These visitors were too confused and overwhelmed to make a purchase decision.

The difference between stopping at a booth and buying from a booth is similar to the difference between opening an email and clicking through to an offer. Your email campaigns must be able to achieve both to be successful. The more personalized and concise you can be in your offers, the simpler the choice will be for your email subscribers.

BONUS To enjoy the best email marketing software, click here

[voidsentprinces]

I am seeing some weird defensiveness in the community lately so, I thought I’d write a little something up on my thoughts regarding it. Because though I love Final Fantasy XIV, my experience getting into it seems to begun to echo through the influx of WoW Refugees coming. So before I go forward let me say, I enjoy FFXIV. I think Shadowbringers is the best MMORPG story, I’ve ever been through. That being said, Heavensward was over hyped for me and Stormblood might be slightly worse than ARR for dividing its focusing among two separate revolutions. One which takes up a sizeable chunk of the game and doesn’t impact it until precisely the penultimate quest before the end of the main Stormblood MSQ. That being said, I have like 50 Million Alts and am planning an OC AU Comic to be posted eventually. With that out of the way let me say my peace:

I am glad, there is a surge of new players in FFXIV but like...ARR is still a hurdle. The story time meanders, it rarely finds focus and it feels very monster of the week up until the very end and not every player is going to wait or want to wait for that whole “It gets better later” spiel. If a game doesn’t grab a player within its first few hours, its its own fault. Another wave of new MMOs doing something different is on its way. Between New World and Ashes of Creation, the MMO Market is about to be bombarded with potential once more. After Endwalker, ARR is gonna have to be polished and shifted even more to compensate because the stagnation of the last twenty odd years ain’t cutting it no more. MMORPGs gonna have to sink or swim. No matter how much I like this game, I am not going to be writing home about how surprising the twist behind the ambush before Ifrit was. Or that same story beat is used in quick succession for Laurentius and again for Tiduslayer also being an imposter or for Thancred being possessed by Lahabrea or how it turns out the Inquisitor is also an imposter spy.

Like ARR has one twist beat and it is always that someone is a spy or isn’t who they say they are and it never refreshens it. By the end of Post-ARR its the same story beat they used for Ungust and that’s like Hours of Content that amounts to, “Yeah so, here’s another person who isn’t who they say they are.” Final Fantasy XIV is a fantastic game and all, but the incoming population shouldn’t be expected to stick around especially if we as community keep hyping up, “Oh it gets better in Heavensward” or “Oh Shadowbringers is where its at”. You set the expectations too high and they’re going to expect the second coming of Christ and as we saw with Cyberpunk 2077 or No Mans Sky or hell who remembers Spore? You put too much stock in something it is never, ever going to deliver on that promise.

I came to FFXIV during WoW Legion which is turning out to be the last good thing that MMO has done. And the grind, the overused story beats, and the world did not warm itself to me. It wasn’t until BFA that I actually broke into FFXIV and the only reason I broke through ARR is because I had already done the same thing with Dark Souls. A game about banging your head against a wall until it submits itself in defeat out of pity. Pretty sure general population didn’t get into Dark Souls either.

Point is, I am starting see a lot of defensiveness when a WoW Refugee comes over and isn’t instantly enamored with FFXIV and goes to try something else. If someone is turned off by something and goes to do something else they aren’t worst for it and they didn’t personally break into your house and steal your pets. They’re giving valid criticisms as to why it just didn’t connect with them. No one should have to get use to a look or a story. The story and look should be there to draw them in. Serve as a way to hook them and if it doesn’t there is little you can do about it.

And actually now that I think of it, I feel the need to quote a game critic talking about Dark Souls that I feel holds true for FFXIV experience and how the community seems to have to hint at it getting better at certain story beats later on:

“Now, I never reviewed Dark Souls because other titles were out and my playtime was limited, and every time I sat down to it, it was like walking into a dark shed full of rakes, immediately treading on one and getting blatted in the face. Other people with more time on their hands started telling me it was the greatest thing since tummy-rubs, so I'd go back in the shed thinking, "Well, maybe there was just the one rake," before BLAT in the face again!

So I left it for a while, but this week with plenty of free time in my schedule, I thought to myself, "Last chance! I'll just keep tanking the rakes and maybe I'll somehow become really psychotically into being rake-faced just in time to be prepared for the sequel." And I'll be blatted in the face with a rake if that isn't kind of what happened. I've been raking myself all week right up to bedtime, I'm at risk of going blind!

You see, I resisted Dark Souls partly because people kept telling me, "It's good once you're used to it" and I've always held that the same thing can be said about being boiled alive, so I'd ask them to explain why it's good and they'd reply, "Ooh, we can't tell you. You'll just have to find out for yourself." And then I'd say, "Shut up or fuck off, ideally both, in either order!" But then after watching a decent Lets Play of the game, gone over the wiki a few times and a six week preparation with a team of advisors and physical trainers, I was able to break through the wall. And I suppose that's the first failing of Dark Souls; that you need the fucking Cliff's Notes to get into it.”

Final Fantasy XIV A Realm Reborn treads the same road and is unfortunately the entry point in the series and not everyone is built to do the grind all over again after coming from another MMO. Heavensward is an okay story, the aether currents if you’re not an altoholic like me are irritating to track down especially if, like me, you pick up flying to finish exploring a zone. Stormblood leaves much to be desired from the way it sort of forces Lyse down your throat to the way Hien just sort of goes about thing a little too pragmatically to be called a hero and doesn’t enamor any more confidence during Yotsuyu’s amnesia arc. Shadowbringers is the moment the story becomes about you. Which is kind of strange in the context that an MMO should make you feel like you are the central character and WoW’s greatest failing is in that the world changes about you and you have little say in how things actually unfold. It is a difficult balance to find but one Shadowbringers has done beautifully.

But again, to have to drag yourself through a two expansions to get to the actual goods while having the ever present need of FOMO to be with your friends. ARR certainly isn’t doing the influx any favors.

I am happy our community is welcoming and that there is a sizeable group of people sticking with it til the good stuff. To expect everyone to immediately become entranced by this new world we’re being thrown into is a little silly.

I am sure no one I follow or who can see this is causing an uproar but hey it never hurts to just get it out my system. Oh hey and there’s only 3 months until Endwalker. Here’s hoping for another solid expansion folks. Be excellent to one another even those who only stick around for five minutes and then leave the game for something else.

[c6h94]

10 songs with lyrics that don’t actually mean what you think they do

10 songs with lyrics that don’t actually mean what you think they do

These songs aren’t about a breakup, a love connection or a cute date in the literal sense. In fact, many of your favorite rock, scene and mainstream artists share a love for metaphors in their tracks, whether they’re talking about personal struggles or systemic issues.

These songs below cover everything from addiction to even scooter accidents during a competition. See if you know the backstories behind these tracks and realize what the artist really intended to say.

Read more: Here are 10 of the most unexpected collabs to come from 2020 Machine Gun Kelly – “5:3666” (feat. phem)

In his 2019 track “5:3666,” Machine Gun Kelly teamed up with phem to write the ultimate sad song about missing “her.” In this case, every reference to a lady is actually about cocaine. MGK is open about his struggles with addiction and doesn’t shy away from sharing how he sometimes thinks about it but ultimately knows his family, friends and fans need him more.

Green Day – “American Idiot”

We all know that Green Day have chanted “No Trump! No KKK! No Fascist USA!” in the past. So, it’s a little silly to see Trump supporters use this song to describe their opponents across the political aisle. Does someone want to tell them? It’s getting a little embarrassing, and Billie Joe Armstrong wants nothing to do with the former president.

All Time Low – “Dancing With A Wolf”

This song isn’t purely about a toxic romantic relationship. In “Dancing With A Wolf,” All Time Low are also sharing their negative feelings about partnerships in and out of the music industry. It’s a “big middle finger to anyone that’s fucked us over in the past,” Alex Gaskarth said in an interview. “There’s parts about our relationships. We’ve always tried to keep it positive and we’ve seen it pay off.”

Melanie Martinez – “Dollhouse”

Melanie Martinez used her album Cry Baby to illustrate the story of her character of the same name. This track not only discusses Cry Baby’s chaotic home life with an alcoholic mother, but Martinez shared how the deeper meaning behind “Dollhouse” is that “everyone has their problems, and you’re never going to truly see them… Everyone has shit they go through.”

YUNGBLUD – “parents”

Contrary to what you think, YUNGBLUD isn’t telling you to go flip off your parents. Instead, he wants you to tell anyone who has ever made you feel small to “fuck off.” In a Genius interview, he established that you know yourself best, and being authentic is more important than abiding by society’s standards. He just chose “parents” to represent things that make you feel lesser than and societal expectations as a whole.

The 1975 – “I Couldn’t Be More In Love”

If you’re merely a casual listener of the 1975, their ’80s-influenced ballad “I Couldn’t Be More In Love” may strike you as the perfect song for the first dance at a wedding. Unfortunately, the story veers on the tragic side. It’s actually about “what happens when people stop caring” and “trusting your instinct as an artist,” frontman Matty Healy explained in an interview. All in all, this is Healy letting his fanbase know that he’s afraid of losing them and doesn’t want to hurt them.

Oliver Tree – “Hurt”

You may think Oliver Tree was hurt in a relationship, but you would be sorely mistaken. In fact, this singer shared in a Genius interview that he was hurt in a scooter competition when he was 18. His pain stemmed from hitting a pebble on the course and losing his balance. He not only got a few injuries, including two broken wrists, but his pride was a little damaged, too.

Fall Out Boy – “Thnks Fr Th Mmrs”

If you thought that this famous Fall Out Boy hit was about a breakup, think again because Pete Wentz redefined it for us. While he may have left fans with more questions than answers, he shared how “Thnks Fr Th Mmrs” encompasses many meanings. The chorus, he described, is about “FOMO.” Feel free to analyze this one as much as you’d like.

Tyler, The Creator – “NEW MAGIC WAND”

In Foster The People fashion, Tyler, The Creator wrote a metaphorical track about gun violence and toxic relationships called “NEW MAGIC WAND.” His iconically metal performance of the song at the Grammys wasn’t intended for Harry Potter fans. Many music bloggers and writers theorized that he was referring to Photoshop and other objects in the song’s title. However, he disclosed on Twitter that the wand is a gun.

Ashnikko – “Daisy”

This may be the sexy TikTok song you know, love and maybe featured in one of your own videos. However, Ashnikko had much darker intentions. In a Genius interview, she described how she creates a character who feeds into the writing of her songs. In this case, “Daisy” isn’t describing the cute flower entirely. The song chronicles the whole story behind a character of the same name who seduces men and enacts a little revenge. “Daisy is this bad bitch who wears exclusively latex, blue diamonds and these glass platforms with an aquarium in the heel,” she says. “She’s sick, and she throat punches rapists and horrible, horrible people.”

[boallkillernofiller]

Blonde Otter’s Album is All Killer, No Filler

How a band known for live shows and reunion-like afterparties refocuses on the music

By Fiona Shea

One February evening I found myself in a virtual room with the five members of the New York-based rock band, Blonde Otter. They were all very punctual, waiting for me in a calm silence when I joined. I awkwardly waved at the camera and said “Helloooo” as one does when she joins a virtual room with people who she admires, but doesn’t know very well.

(From left to right: Stephen Malichek, Matt Falcone, Michael Guariglia, Rob Falcone, Dan Wines)

I know Matt (drums) and Rob Falcone (bass, vocals) from mutual friends and Rival parties at Fordham, which is how we decided that I’d write a little something about their album release. To Michael Guariglia (lead vocals), Stephen Malichek (rhythm guitar), and Dan Wines (lead guitar), I was another Fordham fan, having been in the crowd at dozens of concerts, and maybe bumping shoulders with them at afterparties.

Following my graduation in 2019, I always felt really cool telling my Connecticut friends — who also lived in the city —  that I was going to a concert that weekend. Every time I’d explain that I actually kind of knew some of the band members and could always sing along to the songs they’d cover. All of the Fordham and non-Fordham people I’d describe, it was a really legit scene to them. And to me. It all felt very NYC and very cultured. I felt lucky to have this band in my social sphere.

Union Pool

One Blonde Otter night that remains crystal clear when I reminisce on my favorite nights out in NYC pre-Covid is a Bowery Ballroom → Beauty Bar → IHOP odyssey. The concert itself was a blast; it was my first time going to Beauty Bar which I thereafter began frequenting; and it was also my first time inside of the city’s only IHOP. This sparked a future routine of stumbling into 24-hour diners in the early mornings for mozzarella sticks and delirious conversations.

A typical Blonde Otter night went like this: Tickets purchased, the group chat going off, the pregame set, the after-party location dropped. If you were in the Blonde Otter realm and you were missing a highly-anticipated concert, it was like, “Where else would you be?” These FOMO-worthy, eventized concerts were no accident. The Blonde Otter guys meticulously crafted their brand of their band with curated, fun-filled nights. They set the vibe of the entire experience  — blending groups of people to create an inclusive and welcoming atmosphere, selecting songs that would get the entire crowd on their feet and in their feels, picking just the right bar for the after-party, and keeping the high energy rolling into the early morning.

The concerts kept getting better and better as time passed, too. “The last 5 shows were the best we’d ever done,” Dan explained. But when Covid came into the picture in March of 2020, Blonde Otter was forced to rebrand and realign their energy. 

Mike said that instead of just waiting for it all to be over, the band “kept the momentum going from our shows and put that into creating music. Our music.”

Rob and Michael began writing the album starting in August of 2019, and wrapped up the process almost exactly one year later in August of 2020. Rob, who was calling into our “meeting” from a dimly lit Amtrak train, eloquently spoke about the duo’s songwriting evolution. 

“Previously we were writing more casually, about partying and going out with friends. With personal tragedy and then wider tragedies like Covid, there was a natural progression to go deeper. It’s highly personal, detailed, and nuanced. It’s become more relatable.” Michael coined the album as, “a personal take on the universal” exploring themes of “loss, love, identity, and coming-of-age.”

Rob Falcone on bass guitar.

Matt felt like this time was an opportunity to rebrand. Blonde Otter no longer had to “stick to the costume” of live performing for a moment, and could refocus on the music. The band could be more complex with their vision, and evolve into the rock band they had always wanted to be. For Michael, that’s what “Indie” music is — “transcending and bending Rock genre norms and classifications.” According to Stephen, remote collaboration was one of the reasons why the band was able to successfully experiment with new music. He explained that they had ample time to perfect the album because they were able to listen to what they had recorded for months before actually mixing it.

Matt Falcone on drums.

I received different versions of the album since we first convened on Zoom back in February. One week it was a texted link, the next it was an email, the following a file share, with some songs in final form and other songs nearly complete. Then one magical morning, I received the private Soundcloud playlist with all eleven songs mixed and mastered. To my non-musically inclined ears, every version had been ready to be released. But for the five Blonde Otter guys, they were examining their work, breaking it apart again, then perfecting it. Michael said, “It’s a tight album, the tracks are pretty brief and not repetitive. We play the hook once twice, then play it again. It’s all killer, no filler.” To this fan’s ears, it is definitely all killer.

At one point in the interview Matt opened up to the group and shared an intimate confession which is that sometimes he feels like he’s “tweeting to a brick wall” from the Blonde Otter account. They (especially Matt) want and need more followers, and the fans want and need more BO content, so it’s a win-win for everyone. Fair warning, all five BO members have access to the social accounts, so sometimes posts will slip through the cracks before all members can vet them. 

Stephen chimed in saying, “Someone will tweet something and I’ll see it and be like, who the fuck posted this.” 

Most of the time, though, these guys are putting a lot of time and effort into crafty posts like this one to engage their fans and loosen up the timeline. To stay up-to-date with all things BO, follow the band on Twitter and Instagram.

Just like the reunion-like performances and the all-nighter after-parties we love to fantasize about one day participating in again, this album drop on April 23rd is something you don’t want to miss. More than anything, you don’t want to be that person in the crowd at the first Blonde Otter concert, post-Covid, not knowing the words to their songs. I know I’ll be feeling like a rockstar whenever the time comes when I get to tell my Connecticut friends that I’m going to a Blonde Otter concert. And this time, the band actually knows who I am. It adds a whole nother level of cool.

[creatingflamecontent101]

Launch Your OnlyFans Account with a Bang

With most things in life, starting on the right track will make things easier down the line. Whilst mistakes and wrong directions can be valuable life lessons, wouldn’t it be great if you could launch your OnlyFans account with a bang and ride on that train of success? Here are some ways to do that.

Prepare, prepare

Yes, you do hear stories of people starting an OnlyFans on a whim and doing really well. However, for most, the secret to success is planning. Use our calculator to get an estimate on how much you could earn on OnlyFans and then think about how much time and resources you are willing to put into this. As an influencer, you are probably used to thinking of yourself as a business. Whilst spontaneous content can be wonderful, it’s probably a good idea to plan out most of your content in advance, at least to begin with. Try different types of content and different posting patterns and keep records of what works well, until you find your OnlyFans routine.

IN OTHER WORDS

YES, THERE ARE CREATORS WHO START WITH NO PLANNING WHATS SO EVER, BUT NOT ALWAYS! THE SECRET TO SUCCESS IS HAVING A PLAN SET IN STONE, MAYBE AN OUTLINE OR A TO-DO LIST TO CHECK OFF DAILY/WEEKLY. HAVE YOU EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT THE AMOUNT OF MONEY YOU CAN MAKE IF YOU DID IT RIGHT? THEY HAVE A CALCULATOR YOU CAN USE TO CALCULATE HOW MUCH TIME, EFFORT AND RESOURCES YOU’RE WILLING AND ABLE TO PRODUCE AND PUT FOURTH AND ESTIMATE THE AMOUNT YOU’RE ABLE TO MAKE/ROUGHLY.( i have never used it but apparently it exists.) TO SUM UP THIS PARAGRAPH, YES IT IS POSSIBLE TO ACHEIVE SUCCESS WITH OUT A PLAN BUT TO BEGIN WITH ITS A GREAT IDEA, PLAN DIFFERENT THEMES OUT FOR EACH WEEK PERHAPS, PLAN DIFFERENT CONTENT FOR DIFFERENT DAYS OF THE WEEK AND SEE HOW YOUR FANS REACT! IF YOU PLAN IT OUT IN ADVANCE YOU HAVE TIME FOR TRIAL AND ERROR, IF THE FANS DONT LIKE IT YOU KNOW FOR NEXT TIME NOT TO USE THAT TYPE OF CONTENT! TRY DIFFERENT POSTING PATTERNS, THEY HAVE A SCHEDULE POST OPTION ON THE POST THAT CAN BE YOUR BFF WHILE PLANNING !

Know your audience

We often see between 1% and 5% of a creator’s followers on their free socials sign-up to OnlyFans. The people you’re catering to are likely to be your most dedicated fans, who want to interact with you and your content on a deeper level. Consider how you can sell your OnlyFans to these people.

One entrepreneurial mid-level creator did a poll on her Instagram asking her followers whether she should get an OnlyFans account. As well as planting the idea into the heads of everyone who watches her Instagram followers, many people responded to the story letting her know how much they would love to pay for exclusive content on OnlyFans. When this creator launched her account she messaged these people and they became her core subscribers and highest tippers.

BASICALLY

A CREATOR POSTED A POLL ON HER INSTAGRAM AND ASKED HER FOLLOWERS WHAT THEY THOUGHT ABOUT HER CREATING AN ONLYFANS, THE ONES WHO LIKED IT AND SAID YES SHE SHOULD, SHE ASKED IF THEY WOULD BUY HER EXPLICIT CONTENT AND WHEN AGREED, AND SHE LAUNCHED THOSE INDIVIDUALS BECAME HER BEST AND MAIN SUBSCRIBERS AND HIGHEST TIPPERS.

Promote

The easiest way is through to promote your OnlyFans is online. We recommend you place your OnlyFans profile link in the “About” fields of your social media profiles, share posts via Twitter or advertise your OnlyFans page anywhere you have followers. You can also get creative about promoting your OnlyFans offline – if you’re a performer you could hold a launch party to spread the word in the physical world. Many of our creators also find success launching OnlyFans with an introductory rate and then raising their price when they get more comfortable with the system.

IN REAL WORLD TERMS

PROMOTE, PROMOTE, PROMOTE! PASTING YOUR ONLYFANS IN YOUR ABOUT SECTION OF EACH OF YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA PROFILES AND SHARING YOUR LINK VIA PICTURE CAPTIONS(INSTA) POST IT IN YOUR STATUS ON FACEBOOK, STORY TOO . TWEET YOUR LINK AND ASK FOR RETWEETS! IF YOU ARE A PERFORMER OR CELEBRITY YOU COULD HOLD A LAUNCH PARTY TO GET WORD OUT IN THE PHYSICAL WORLD! MOST CREATORS FIND SUCCESS WITH STARTING WITH A PROMOTIONAL RATE AND THEN AFTER SAY 90 DAYS OR SO AFTER BECOMING FAMILIAR WITH THE SYSTEM AND HOW IT WORKS, RAISE THE PRICE SLOWLY!

Start with great content

A great way to launch your OnlyFans account with a bang is to use some exceptional content for its debut. If there’s a wonderful idea you’ve been sitting on for a while, now is the time. Let all your followers on your free platform know that this amazing piece of content is on your OnlyFans to create a sense of FOMO and encourage them to sign up.

IN OTHER WORDS:

A GREAT WAY TO LAUNCH YOUR PAGE IS TO POST SOME EXCEPTIONAL CONTENT FOR THE DEBUT (FOR THE BEGINNING/START OF YOUR PAGE!) GOT AN IDEA YOU’VE BEEN THINKING OF FOR A WHILE? WELL NOWS THE TIME SWEETHEART AND THERES NO BETTER TIME TO PUT IT INTO THE WORKS! TELL THE WORLD ON YOUR FREE SOCIAL MEDIA PROFILES BY MAYBE CENSORING SOME CONTENT (ill post an example below) AND MAKING PEOPLE CURIOUS! LET THE PEOPLE KNOW WHERE TO SEE THE REAL PRODUCT ON YOUR FREE PROFILES AND ENCOURAGE THEM TO SIGN UP !

Be Bamboo

Like most entrepreneurial endeavours, success on OnlyFans requires you to be like bamboo; strong and flexible. This might seem in contrast to point one, but it’s not. It’s good to have a plan, but realistically there are unexpected factors that will come into play when you actually start your OnlyFans, and you need to be able to roll with the punches. For example, some creators have problems choosing an appropriate subscription price. If you’re not getting as many subscribers as you expected, you might want to consider lowering your price. If you’ve had a lot of people sign up and you can’t keep up with your inbox, maybe consider raising it. Ultimately, pay attention to what’s working and what’s not, be willing to adapt and enjoy the ride.

TO SUM IT UP:

YOU NEED TO BE A STRONG INDIVIDUAL (MENTALLY) AND FLEXIBLE (TIME WISE AND HAVE AN OPENMIND) THIS MAY SEEM IN CONTRAST WITH THE FIRST PARAGRAPH BUT IT ISN’T. ITS GOOD TO HAVE A PLAN BUT THERE ARE UNEXPECTED FACTORS THAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN YOU START THE SITE AND YOU NEED TO BE ABLE TO “ROLL WITH THE PUNCHES” EXAMPLE BEING THE PRICE; SOME CREATORS STRUGGLE WITH WHAT PRICE TO START WITH, IF YOU AREN’T GETTING AS MANY SUBSCRIBERS AS YOU EXPECTED TRY LOWERING IT (not too much because if people think it is too cheap they will be reluctant to buy it) NOW IF THE OPOSITE OCCURS AND YOURE UNABLE TO KEEP UP WITH REPLIES IN YOUR INBOX AND ETC, TRY HIGHERING IT A LITTLE. PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO THE THINGS YOU DO THAT ARE WORKING WELL AND CLOSER ATTENTION THO WHATS NOT WORKING! BE OPENMINDED AND ADAPT OR GO WITH THE FLOW AND ENJOY THE RIDE BABYGIRL!

PLEASE IF YOU’D LIKE TO SEE THIS AND MANY OTHER BLOGS FEEEL FREE TO CHECK THE LINK OUT BELOW AND THEY’LL LEAD YOU RIGHT TOOO THEM!

[teacuphuman09]

Inceptiversary 2019 MasterPost

It will soon be July and you know what that means! IT’S INCEPTIVERSARY TIME!!!!!!

In case you don’t know (and that’s fine, we love new blood in this fandom), Inceptiversary is the yearly celebration of the release of the film that keeps us darlings dreaming bigger: Inception. It takes place over five weeks (July 1st to August 5th) and includes fandom focused events, challenges, and content. It’s when we Inceptionites come together to strengthen the community, show appreciation, and welcome in a new generation of dreamers!

ALL SHIPS ARE WELCOME in the Inceptiversary festivities and we encourage you to explore a ship you haven’t before. You never know what you might find!

“But wait, teacup,” you say. “How am I to keep track of all these awesome events? How will I know what’s happening and what’s to come?”

I’m glad you asked, dear dreamer, because we have the super-organized and equally awesome @freighttraininmybrain over at the Inception Social Calendar and the miraculous trio of @flosculatory, @deinvatiwrites, and @dbshawnblog on the @Inceptiversaryblog keeping us from succumbing to Inception FOMO! So hold onto your grip on reality because the unbelievable details of this year’s Inceptiversary are laid out below!

1) Theme Weeks: 

Inceptiversary is structured over five glorious weeks, each of which caters to a theme in fandom. Fans are encouraged to post and reblog all manner of content related to each week’s theme. Memes, fics, fanvids, artwork, conspiracy theories; all will find a home! And you may just discover something you didn’t know you needed in your life.

This year’s Theme Weeks are:

Week 1, July 1 - 7 No Stone Unturned - Inception Gen Week 

This is a special Theme Week this year as we’ve paired it with a prompt challenge of the same name that will be run by @bayta-darell! The Inception fandom has a ton of love to go around, but what about the non-romantic kind of love? This week, we're focusing on all of the great platonic and familial relationships with a series of daily prompts. These are just meant as a starting point to get you inspired and by all means, disregard these as much as you want! All Inception content that isn't based on romantic or sexual relationships is welcome, and fanwork recommendations are certainly encouraged as well. Have fun, and happy Inceptiversary!

Day 1: Backstory

Day 2: Team Dynamics

Day 3: Character Study

Day 4: Rare/Underappreciated Characters (Philippa, James, Miles, Nash... anyone outside of our main dream team)

Day 5: Non-Canon Interactions

Day 6: World-Building

Day 7: Post-Canon

Week 2, July 8 - 14 It’s The End Of The World As We Know It: 

Zombies! Meteors! The Rapture! Girl Scouts! It’s the apocalypse and we want to know all about the survivors!

Week 3, July 15 - 21 Curtain Fic: 

Domestication at its best! Bring out all your happily ever afters and spend a week in bliss as your favourite ships ride off on magical rainbow unicorns and make all their dreams come true!

Week 4, July 22 -28 In Between The Lines: 

We all have them. Those headcanons about what went on behind the scenes of Inception. What happened to Tadashi? Is Ariadne hiding gills under all those scarves? Just what did the team do with all that time left over in the dream? And for Nolan’s sake, did the damn top fall over or not?

Week 5, July 29 - August 5 Crack/Fluff: 

It’s been a long month so kick back and relax with a large dose of everyone’s favourite guilty pleasure: Crackfic! We all need those fics that are purely for entertaining silly and happy ideas. They’re a soft place to land and a great opportunity to get wacky ideas out of your head! Indulge and enjoy the ride!

2. Watch Parties (@corinnetags, @noitsnacktime, @freighttraininmybrain ):    

Watch parties are an excellent way to meet other people in fandom and tend to create a ton of inspiration for future wips! All movies are connected to the cast of Inception in one way or another and will be held on either Slack or Discord or both depending on host availability/preference.  The schedule for all viewings can be found on the Inceptiversary Social Calendar.

3. Watch Party Bingo: (@withinmeloveresides1, @zuulee63)

On July 1st, 16th, and 31st, Inception Bingo during the Official (not really) Inception Watch Parties! You can check out the viewing times on the Inception Social Calendar. More info to come!

4. Inception 30 Day Challenge (@flosculatory): 

The 30 Day Challenge is such an interesting and entertaining look into the minds of your fellow Inceptionites! Learn how others feel about your favourite Inception moments and enjoy a look back at why we’re all still here, nine years after its release.

5. Trope/Kink Bingo (@teacuphuman09, @dreamhubbies):

One of the most popular aspects of Inceptiversary is the Trope/Kink Bingo, and goodness, does it ever deliver! Scoot on over to @inceptiversarybingo  for info on how to get your hands on your very own bingo card, then indulge your (not so) secret desire to write all the tropes and/or kinks your little fandom heart desires!

6) AELDWS: (@teacuphuman09):

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a stake in this year’s Arthur/Eames Last Drabble Writer Standing event. AELDWS was missed last year, but in 2019 it’s returning to its roots and eliminating one writer every week until a champion is crowned! (I’m coming for you, @deinvatiwrites)

7)  Inceptionkitties: (@a-forger-and-a-point-man) 

The Caption Contest is back! Send in your purrfect puss pics, captioned with a quote from Inception and you could win all the fame and fortune of the Inception cat fandom! Get to it, meow!

8)  Inception Quiz (@thingsbeginningwitha, @betterpausenow, @freighttraininmybrain):

Known by some (me) as one of the most difficult quizzes of all time, the Inception Quiz tests your knowledge, dedication, and attention to detail of all things Inception. Think you can handle it? (You can!) More details to come!

9) Inception Positivity: (@flosculatory)

Do you have a fandom crush? Someone you admire or look up to? Someone you feel needs to know just how important and appreciated they are? Then jump over to @inceptionpositivity to fill out a submission form and send your love across the fandom!

10) Fic Recs: (@teacuphuman09)

Looking for a specific fic or wanting to read along with the Theme Weeks? @inceptionficrx (@teacuphuman09) has what the doctor ordered! We’ll have weekly reading recs as well as special recs for Wednesday Hump Day and Bunk Fic Fridays (@avacynner); little pick-me-ups and some pants-tingling to see you through the weekend!

11) Inception/007 Battle Royale: (@a-forger-and-a-point-man)

The who, what, where, and when has yet to be announced, but get ready for yet another fight to the (canon)death! More details to come!

12) Inception Big Bang: (@dreaminghigher)

Back after a few years off, the Inception Big Bang is a fantastic event that combines titillating fic ideas with gorgeous artwork! Head on over to @inceptionbigbang for more info, and hurry because sign-ups are almost closed!

13)  Fandom Auction for @nolaespoir: (@corinnetags)

Fandom lost an incredible talent and friend, Nolaespoir, and this year’s auction is in her name, with proceeds going to charities dedicated to suicide prevention and mental health. Check out the auction site and bid on some amazing items up for grabs!

14) Here’s a list of other Inceptiversary blogs and tags you should follow to keep up to date on the festivities:

First and foremost there is the Inception Blogs Masterlist, curated by the incomparable @a-forger-and-a-point-man

Are you a member of the InceptionSlack yet? It’s a great online platform that allows us to communicate directly and get to know each other! We have chat rooms for just about everything from career support to writing & art, and everyone is welcome! We have the best custom emojis, let me tell you! This is also where the Watch Parties will be hosted, so if you’d like an invitation, send @teacuphuman09 or @deinvatiwrites an ask!

Looking for something a little more Inception-centric than Slack? Want to be part of everything Inception related? The Inception Discord is the place to be! So head on over and check their platform out and enjoy some sweet, sweet discord!

Wondering about who’s who or the history of our fandom over the past nine years? @flosculatory and @gessorosso have put together two wonderful resources! The Friending Meme is a place to put your deets if you’re wanting to connect with others in the fandom and the Fandom Page (which now houses the Friending Meme!) is an ongoing collection of events and moments in fandom history. If you’d like to contribute something to the Fandom Page, please contact @gessorosso.

You should obviously be following #inception,  #inceptiversary, and your ship tags (tumblr.com/tagged/[search term]), but may we also suggest:

#christopher nolan

#emma thomas

#wally pfister

#hans zimmer

#tom hardy

#ken watanabe

#marion cotillard

#leonardo dicaprio

#dileep rao

#ellen page

#joseph gordon-levitt

#cillian murphy

#michael caine

#lukas haas

#tom berenger

#pete postlethwaite (RIP)

14) Where can I find the Inception Button I keep hearing so much about?

RIGHT HERE!

That’s it, that’s all (it’s not, there’s always more). So get ready because we’re just days away from Inceptiversary 2019!

[smellycinnamonthundahfudge]

Safehouse

is this my entry to the first day of spideychelle month? yes it is. does it even vaguely follow the prompt for said day? probably not. am i doing this cus i’ve got a desperate case of the fomos? HELL YEAH, you know i do

i had this idea and thought that a couple of months after ffh was good enough to count as the future hahaha hope yall enjoy folks

Weirdly enough, the easiest problem to tackle in the hot steaming pile of garbage that Mysterio dumped on Peter and co.’s lives, was apparently the drone strikes allegations.

It was easy enough because stark tech was involved in the allegation and Ms. Potts was eager enough to clear her company’s name on any and all involvement in peter’s alleged crime, thus clearing his name in the process.

No, the hardest part was the adjustment period; the world now knew who Spider-man was and Beck had now effectively put a target on each and every one of Peter’s loved ones. MJ and Ned had hired bodyguards following them wherever they went (fortunately enough, no criminals had thought of to kidnap them or something, but better safe than sorry, peter thought).

Meanwhile, Peter and May were now living in a remote well hidden secret location safehouse. Peter and MJ were supposed to be dating now but maintaining a relationship isn’t really that easy when half the city’s criminal underlife wanna kill you. Suffice it to say, the entire affair sucked.

The point of the whole secret identity thing was so that peter could still have a normal life but now… it seemed like the possibility of getting back that life was completely destroyed. And he can’t even bring the man responsible to justice. Yeah, the whole thing just sucked.

There had to be a way out of this, and there probably would be, he’s already thought of a couple possibilities that were subsequently shot down (track down every single possible threat and have them arrested or threaten that they would be, create another fake spider-man so people wouldn’t think it was peter, give up being spider-man). But as long as that miracle epiphany hadn’t come to fruition yet, until there was a full proof plan that would guarantee everyone’s safety and help peter keep the spider-man name, this crap pile of a safety strategy was all they had for the moment.

And so yeah, for what seemed to be the longest time being, it was safehouse safehouse safehouse aanndd yup, you guessed it, more safehouse.

But, there was still one glimmer of hope left, despite it all. It was the monthly visit from Ned and MJ. Peter lived for those visits; he’d prepare everything they could possibly need beforehand and would pace their living room until one of them arrived at which point he’d give them all the biggest bear hug.

They all gave each other updates on what happened, so it was mostly just Ned and MJ talking about what was happening on the outside world, but Peter didn’t mind, he was just so happy they were there. And so they talked, caught each other up on how the other was doing, until eventually they were sick of talking and just decided to watch movies instead, this time they decided to binge the og star wars trilogy.

Lando and Chewy had just flown off in the Millennium Falcon when Peter “slyly” (MJ noticed it, Peter wasn’t fooling anyone) gave Ned a look.

“Oh wow, will you look at the time, I’ve gotta head home. My parents need help with this… thing, it’s really important,” says Ned who already left from his spot on the couch and was now packing up his stuff.

“Really? What thing, Ned?” asked MJ, with an amused smirk on her face.

Peter gave Ned another look which also didn’t pass by MJ. She knew why they were doing this, might as well just mess with them about it.

After a brief awkward silence where Peter was silently pleading to Ned to just think of something. Ned wouldn’t be able to explain why the next word he said was the first that popped in his head.

“BED! Uhhh they… need my help to flip a bed. It’s no big deal actually but, you know parents, do what they say and all that. Welp I’m out of here. Bye, Peter. Bye, MJ. Have fun!” and with a slam of the door, Ned hurried out of the apartment and left Peter and MJ alone in the living room.

“Bye Ned! Stay safe!” Peter remarked to the door, as Ned had jolted out of the place before Peter could say bye back.

“Must be some bed, huh,” Peter told MJ as he looked back at her.

MJ couldn’t help but laugh at the excuse.

“Peter, you know I know why you guys are doing this so why bother even making up excuses about it?” says MJ as she lies her head on the couch, but with a smile on her face, equal parts amused and exasperated at Ned and Peter’s whole routine.

“I have NO IDEA what you’re talking about, MJ, you heard Ned. He said he had to help his parents flip a mattress. That’s really important; those things are heavy, for you guys at least.”

“Mmhhmm yeah right, just like they needed his help watering plants, cleaning the roof, oh and what was it last time, walking their dog?”

“Ned’s a good son, MJ, I don’t see anything wrong with that,” said Peter with a shrug.

“Peter, Ned’s allergic to dogs, his family doesn’t have one.”

It takes Peter a beat to come up with “Maybe they were dogsitting??”

MJ just laughs out of exasperation.

“Fine, I’m done, just so you know, you guys aren’t fooling anyone and you guys are just doing this for your own benefit. Let’s just watch Return of the Jedi already,” says MJ as she snuggles up next to Peter.

“Once again, MJ, I have no idea what you’re talking about” says Peter with an amused smirk on his face while MJ just rolls her eyes at him.

“Ned’s just being a good friend- urgh I mean son. Good son heh,” as Peter awkwardly doesn’t look at MJ and just stares at the TV screen.

MJ just looks at Peter incredulously but fondly.

“Yeah, I can’t say I disagree with you on that,” says MJ with a fond smile on her face as she leans her head on Peter’s shoulder.

Peter finally looks back at MJ and just smiles. Yeah, he’s glad to have a guy in the chair, wingman, and best friend like Ned. And Peter and MJ finally just watch the movie in a comfortable silence, appreciating each other’s company without having to dial down their level of affection for one another.

But soon enough, the last film of the trilogy ends just as the blue sky outside was now turning a blazing red. The sun was setting, which meant it was going to be dark soon, which meant MJ was going to leave.

Peter always dreaded this part.

As the credits roll, Peter looks at the clock, and then looks back to MJ.

“I guess you have to go now too, huh?” asked Peter with an obvious sad demeanor, as he runs his fingers thru hers.

“Yeah” MJ looks down at their intertwined hands “I guess I have to.”

MJ reluctantly breaks away from their intertwined hands and starts to pack her stuff up and head to the door while Peter’s a few feet away just watching her do this, walking her to the door; all of this done in an uncomfortable sad silence.

Peter and MJ are now both at the door, both just waiting for the other to say something and pull the plug on their rare chance of meeting in person.

“I-” “I-” Peter and MJ both begin to say and both of them just giving an awkward chuckle at their synchronicity.

“You go first,” says Peter with a smile, waiting for what MJ was going to say.

“Heh just- just wanted to say…” MJ begins to say, before she just dives in and hugs Peter as tight as she could.

“I’m gonna miss you, Peter” says MJ burrowing her head onto Peter’s shoulder.

Peter hugs MJ back and burrows his head onto her shoulder, MJ’s hair is right onto his face but he actually likes it, smelling that faint aroma of lavender from her pretty curls.

“That’s actually what I was gonna say too heh” says Peter in a sad chuckle.

“I’m really gonna miss you, MJ” and at that Peter tightens his hug, in a sad attempt to almost stop her from leaving. But MJ loosens her hug and so Peter does too; MJ wipes her eyes in a preemptive strike to prevent any tears from falling as she does and just sadly chuckles too.

“Bye, Peter.”

She was just about to turn and walk away when MJ hesitates in doing/saying something and before she knows it, she just leans in and gives Peter a soft chaste kiss on the lips, her sadness pouring out of her goodbye kiss.

Her hand that she used to hold Peter’s face as she kissed him was the same one she used as she held Peter’s hand for the last time as she said “Goodbye, Peter” with both of their eyes closed and their foreheads still leaning onto each other.

She reluctantly breaks her hand free from Peter and quickly walks away without looking back, leaving Peter alone by the door, his fingers ghosting his lips, as he closed the door. He leans against the door once he’s inside, his forehead in a frustrated knot, eyes closed, sighing as he tries to summon the courage to pretend he’s fine.

He’s found himself leaning at the door for a couple of minutes now when May suddenly speaks, having erupted from her office, interrupting Peter’s self-pity spiral.

“Pete, you okay?” asks May, even though she already knows the answer.

Peter sighs and stands up properly, no longer leaning on the door as a crutch.

“I’m fine, May” says Peter with a sad smile.

“It’s just” Peter looks back at the door. “MJ left again.”

May looks at her nephew sadly and slowly approaches him.

“Oh Peter, I know you miss her a lot,” says May as she hugs Peter.

“Heh” Peter just sadly chuckles and agrees. “Yeah, yeah I really do,” says Peter as he hugs back his aunt, taking the comforting gesture as it is.

Peter braces himself for May trying to cheer him up again, a message of hope about how this will all end sooner than you think, and that it’s for the best, etc. Peter obviously knew May’s heart was in the right place but right now he just felt sad and pissed over always having his time with MJ cut short. So he sighed, as he tried to muster his appreciation for his aunt’s, while kind, unfortunately for naught, gesture.

“But we both know it’s for the best,” says May with a sad smile as she breaks away from the hug and looks Peter in the eyes and keeps her hands on his shoulders.

“We just need to do this for a little longer until-”

“Peter, wait!” screams an out of breath sweat drenched MJ busting out of the apartment door.

“MJ?” exclaimed Peter happily as he tore himself away from May’s hold and turned around to face MJ.

“You’re- you’re back,” Peter said in a happy couldn’t believe it reaffirmation that MJ was indeed here. Until he realized he didn’t know why she was back at which point concern flooded his mind.

“Wait, why are you back?” asked Peter, more confused than anything but his fear starting to bubble up, as he began to walk towards MJ and close the door behind her, while checking if there was anyone in the hallway.

As MJ hurriedly walked down the stairs of Peter’s building, she found herself questioning her actions. Each time after they met, she’s found it harder and harder to say goodbye and by now she was just so sick of leaving when all she wanted to do was stay, which was when she decided that enough was enough.

Buying Peter and her a little more time for just one night wouldn’t kill them. They’ll have the rest of the year (or god knows how long) to stick to their stupid arrangement, so for now, she was going to spend the night with her boyfriend and nothing on earth was going to stop her from doing otherwise.

MJ, having ran up how many flights of stairs that she had just gotten down from, couldn’t explain herself to Peter just yet as she was busy trying to catch her breath and maintain her upright position as she held onto her knees for support.

May looks at her nephew with fondness as he caresses the back of the girl of his dreams as she tries to catch her breath. May knew what to do next as she remarked that she was going to get MJ some water from the kitchen and proceeded to leave the two teens alone. Peter leads MJ to the couch as her breathing returns back to normal.

“Are you okay, MJ? Is anything wrong, did something happen?” asks Peter, still worried MJ might have been in danger or something but MJ merely waves him off and lies her head on the couch.

Peter simply sits next to her, unconvinced, waiting for verbal confirmation which causes MJ to give a small incredulous chuckle.

“I’m fine, Peter,” says MJ looking at Peter fondly, always appreciating his constant concern for her wellbeing.

“Are you sure? You’re not here cause you saw someone suspicious or anything?”

Suddenly, MJ looks at Peter with guilt and sympathy, sad that one of Peter’s first thoughts over her coming back was that because she was in danger.

So MJ caresses the side of Peter’s face in an attempt to comfort him or ease any of his worries, looks him straight in his eyes, and says “I’m safe, Peter” in the most unwavering voice she could muster.

Peter lets go of the breath he didn’t know he was holding and finally lets himself smile over his girlfriend coming back to him.

May finally returns with the water she promised and hands it to MJ.

“Thanks, May,” says MJ as she grabs the glass May offers her. “Sorry for dropping in suddenly by the way.”

“Oh it’s fine, honey. Your parents know you’re here?” says May

MJ merely nods as she gulps down the water, and after finishing her drink, just says a quick little “Yup.”

“Okay, good, I’ll just go and… make dinner then. What do you guys want?” May asks the two teens.

Peter and MJ just brush May off, saying whatever’s fine and just like that, the Parker matriarch left and went to the kitchen, leaving Peter and MJ alone once again. But just before she enters the room, she shoots Peter a cute little wink and thumbs up, just happy to see her nephew happy again, and Peter just lets out a small amused chuckle. May has always been supportive and though it was really awkward at times, this time he can’t help but feel the same happiness her aunt has for him as well.

“Soooo, MJ, what are ya doing here?” asks Peter with a smile on his face, trying so hard to play it cool, but failing amazingly at it, because he’s being honest, he didn’t even care. MJ was actually here and it didn’t even matter why she was. He was just so happy to get to spend more time with her than he expected.

“Uuuuhhh”

MJ knows why she came here and she knows for a fact that Peter probably does as well. But it doesn’t mean she was ready to admit she did something romantic spontaneous and unexpected just because she wanted to spend more time with him. And so despite very well knowing she’s being a complete hypocrite for doing this, she says this next.

“My parents were suddenly out of town on a business trip.”

Peter’s jaw drops the slightest and then one of the most shit eating grins he’s ever had starts to form on his face.

“Really?” asks Peter in an almost sarcastic tone.

MJ rolls her eyes. She probably shouldn’t be surprised to be regretting her decision this immediately.

“Yeah, loser, my mother got to go to this audition she thought she lost. They told me I could stay over at a friend’s house just for tonight if I wanted. It’s no big deal, just get over it already,” says MJ in her completely dead pan tone with just a hint of frustration and shyness.

Peter is so happy right now. He knows it’s ridiculous to be this happy just because his girlfriend is now doing the same thing he and Ned were doing, but he just can’t help keep the smile on his face in check. MJ surprised Peter in the most unexpected and wonderful ways he couldn’t imagine and just for a second, Peter thinks this safehouse thing might not have been so bad after all.

~end~

yaaayyy ok so i know it didn’t really follow the future spideychelle au mechanics, but i’d argue that this didn’t really deal with the problems caused by ffh. it’s like they’re putting all those problems on pause and they’re in this little safehouse bubble hehe

this will have 2 follow ups which imma post for week 2. one will be a prequel to this, and the other a straight up follow up hehe. this fic was really just supposed to be backstory/set up and it just got away from me haha

i’m gonna continue to try to be as much of a part of spideychelle month as best i can cus i really really wanna participate in it. i’m so excited just to actually be a part of something like this for the first time ever.  i hoped yalls liked this, cus i really did even despite all the mistakes/inconsistencies n all haha. thank ya alls if you actually read this whole thing and hooray for spideychelle hahaha yaay

oh and ps quick shoutout to @tare8chan, she was my beta on this and without her, i never would have changed the ending of this. her advice totally made it better imo so thank you so much for the notes and compliments and support and stuff huhuhu

looking forward to more spideychelle fics yalls. this gonna be real fun :’) <3

[purplesurveys]

763

Why did you last feel like crying? My thesis was making me anxious and the songs off of Petals for Armor are still very fresh and are resonating with me very strongly for now, so those things happening at the same time nearly made me cry over breakfast.

How long ago and why did you last feel infuriated? Infuriated is a strong word. I suppose I last felt it when I heard the news of the police shooting a former soldier with PTSD for going out without his face mask on to get groceries. You don’t fucking KILL anyone for not having a mask, you educate them and you fucking give them one.

Do emotions control you or do you control your emotions? Uhhh it really depends. Most of the time I always want to address stuff maturely and make sure my emotions are in check before I respond to anything; but there are also times I’ll give myself a treat and allow myself to be petty, letting my emotions control me.

Do you keep your friends secrets/private information to yourself? Some secrets will make it to Gabie, but I mainly tell her only because she’s so forgetful and will forget most details in the next hour. I don’t tell her much more personal secrets, like if someone came out to me.

What negative quality do your friends bring up the most? We don’t really have talks where we talk about our negative qualities; my friends and I do have similar talks, but instead what we do is we’ll raise events in the past where one of us may have annoyed another and be like, “I actually didn’t like when you did/said this or that before.” I’m lucky to have good friends who can be honest and mature about this kind of stuff.

What quality do you think you have that others don't think you do? You’d have to ask them first. I don’t always keep track of how people think of me.

Do you often "jump" to conclusions? Only when I’m expecting a worst-case scenario to happen. I like to always expect the worst so that the actual outcome doesn’t disappoint me as much.

Do you find being alone with strangers scary, interesting or indifferent? It ranges from wary to completely uncomfortable. I never find the prospect of being surrounded by strangers ‘interesting.’

Do you think you know a lot about the world? Definitely not. I’m incredibly young and I know very little outside of my home and school, so I’m currently holding a weird excitement for graduating and getting a job and finally getting to know the rest of the world bit by bit.

What about the world do you wish you never found out? I don’t think like that. I embrace reality lol give me all the bad, worse, and worst news.

Do you know first aid? We had a) health classes throughout high school that taught us first aid and b) a couple of first aid seminars for NSTP in college. Our final exam in freshman year was for each of us to demonstrate CPR to a mannequin. But for some reason, I still haven’t gotten basic first aid down to a T. I think because I’ve never had to use my learnings in an emergency situation, I always end up forgetting them over time.

Does the sight of blood make you feel sick? Oh my god fuck yes, especially my own. Gabie’s nose also bleeds all the time and I always have to excuse myself because I can’t handle the blood, but it also makes me feel like shit that I can’t even help my own girlfriend lmao. I find it so weird because I’ll have no problem watching pro wrestling which has so much more legit blood in it.

Does your first name have an L in it? It does not, but my second and middle names do.

Middle name have a C in it? No. My last name does. You’re always one name off hahaha.

Last name have a R in it? No, but my first does. Catch up bruh.

Do your initials spell a legitimate word? If so, what? No.

The word above, does it have any connection to you at all?

Do you prefer classic rock or nope alternative? I have no idea what nope alternative is but that’s a hilarious typo if it’s one. I do listen to alternative music, but nothing classic rock.

Do you like Kings of Leon? Just their songs that went on to become popular. 

How about The Script? Ah no, was never a fan. I don’t get the appeal of their songs, but they’re so wildly popular here I can’t even begin to tell you just how much. They’ve been to Manila 4 or 5 times, which is already essentially equivalent to a million times when it comes to international acts coming to the Philippines. A lot of artists come here, but very very few come back.

Does crying make you feel better? It doesn’t make me feel better, but it does serve as a nice release.

Do you know a girl called Becca? Yup, one of Rita’s older sisters.

How about a guy called Gregory? Not that name exactly but the Spanish/Italian version, Gregorio. We called him Greg. He was a super brief member of our org but he ghosted us not long after he passed the application. 

Does someones background effect whether you'll be friends with them or not? Background effect made me imagine different auras that people would come with if that we’re possible, like stars or hearts hahahaha. ANYWAY it would definitely depend on what aspect of ‘background’ we’re talking about. Someone’s ethnic or racial background wouldn’t bother me at all, but if they just came out of prison for raping someone I wouldn’t want to be around them, especially if their behavior is still a bit off.

How about their religious background? I preferably wouldn’t want to hang out with anyone who’s a devout, by-the-book Christian because our beliefs would wildly clash and they’ll just ruin any conversation. I wouldn’t even be able to talk about my girlfriend, for instance.

If someone admitted cheating in a past relationship of theirs, would you trust them? No.

Do you drink tea and/or coffee every day? I used to drink coffee everyday this quarantine, but I had to stop because I was starting to get headaches often. I drink it probably 2-3 times a week now.

Did you ever want to be a cook as a kid? Not really. I don’t think I ever said “I want to be a chef like my dad,” or something along those lines as a kid.

How about a fashion designer? No.

Do you wish that magic was real? Not really. I’m fine with the fact that they’re all tricks, it actually makes it more entertaining that way.

What food would you love to wipe off the face of the earth? Eh, at least one person likes each kind of food and I wouldn’t wanna rob them of their joy.

Can you use a bottle opener? I haven’t even tried using one.

Do you own a cheese grater? Yup.

What time will it be in 38 minutes time? 7:18 PM.

What day/date will it be in 11 days time? It’ll be May 21st, a Thursday.

Have you ever owned a pet fish? Yup, just several goldfish as a kid.

Do you prefer fire or ice? Ice.

Do you rap along with rap songs? If I memorize the verses then yeah I can’t help but rap along.

When happy, do you become more talkative? I think so. I get very chatty when with Gabie so that’s probably why.

Bowling or sailing? Why? Bowling, only because I’ve never been sailing. I bet if I were to sail, I’d prefer that, though. < Yup, exactly this. Bowling is fun though!

What colour is your kettle? The one we have is silver. I don’t have my own.

How about your microwave? It is black.

Do you prefer sitting in the front or back of a car? Most of the time I’m the one driving, so that makes me pick front by default haha. When I’m not driving though I really prefer sitting at the back as I rarely get to feel like a passenger anymore.

How about in a train? On the bus? I’ve only ridden a train once but wasn’t able to form an opinion about it. When it comes to the bus, it’s always fun being at the back haha especially when I’m riding with friends.

Do you care about politics? Yes, but my concern is mostly for our own. I’m not up to speed with other countries’ governments; I only know enough to form a general opinion about their highest leader, like how Trump is a piece of shit.

Obama or Bush? Obama.

Blair or Brown? I don’t pay much attention to UK politics. < This. But the royal family, that’s a different story HAHAHA

When did you last cook something from scratch? I *helped* my dad bread chicken several few weeks ago, if that counts.

What things make you jealous? I don’t feel jealous a lot, but when I do it’s usually just FOMO.

Are you offended easily by non politically correct language? Sure, especially if the people using them aren’t willing to be educated.

Do you think the censors/fcc go a bit too far or are just right? Can’t relate.

Do you feel hungry, thirsty, sleepy or none of the above? I’m hungry since it’s time for dinner. I’m just waiting for my dad to finsh up cooking.

What's your I.Q?   I dunno, I’ve never had it checked.

What's your Mum's Mum called? How about your Dad's Dad? I call both sets of grandparents the traditional Filipino way, Lola for my grandmas and Lolo for my grandpas.

Do you prefer crepes, pancakes or waffles? Waffles > pancakes > crepes. I’ve never even had crepes before.

Do you have ice-cream in your fridge right now? Yeah I think so. We always have enough supply of it in the freezer because both of my parents love their ice cream.

How about chicken nuggets? I think we do but it hasn’t been touched in a while since my dad has preferred preparing real food throughout the quarantine haha.

Do you eat fish often? Yes, both cooked and as sushi. Fish is a huge part of Filipino cuisine because duh, we’re surrounded by water. My family will typically have tuyo, danggit, or dilis (kinds of sun-dried fish) for breakast and you can always find a fish dish or two at birthday parties, whether on its own or relleno (stuffed).

Have you ever taken a martial art? Which one{s}? I haven’t. There was a time I wanted to, but I didn’t pursue it because I thought I was too thin and unfit to try it out.

Do you know anyone who is scared of you? Probably.

What person who has died would you bring back and why? Nacho. It wasn’t his time yet.

Do you like watermelon? I like some watermelon-flavored stuff like popsicles, but I don’t eat the fruit.

Can you remember the month of your first kiss? January 24, 2015. Couple steps ahead of ya.

Do you make friends easily? I make acquaintances easily, but I choose who to let into my inner circle. I’d make more friends if I wanted to, but I just choose not to.

What makes you different from everyone else? I honestly don’t know. My interests are pretty common and I haven’t had anything super unique happen to me.

I give you a piece of paper. What do you draw/write on it? Practice my alma mater’s penmanship, which is always my go-to when I’m asked to write anything haha.

What pictures or photos are up in your lounge? Is this a Myspace thing? Lol I don’t really have my photos ‘up’ anywhere on my social media; my accounts just show the latest ones I uploaded.

Do you like purple and white patterned things? It wouldn’t be the first one I’d choose, no.

Do you know anyone called Pipa? No, but my sister went to school with a Pipay. I think her full name was Piper.

I say purple, you think... My great-grandmother. She loved purple and had it everywhere in her home.

What do you think is the most interesting thing about you? I don’t know. I’d rather people who know me answer this as they might be able to come up with different answers, and it’d be interesting to see how they see me.

Do you like being complimented or does it make you uncomfortable? It’s nice to be recognized but overall I’m shit at accepting them. 

Does the description of your starsign correspond with your personality? My astrology-believing friends tell me that they match, but I don’t believe in astrology so I don’t think about it all that much and mostly think of it as coincidence.

Do you have a photo album? Yeah my mom was big on albums from when my siblings and I were infants to when we reached pre-teen years. Each of us have two photo albums.

What artists’ paintings do you find the most beautiful? Monet’s.

What about the most disturbing? I find it more sad than disturbing, but I’ve always been affected by artists who made self-portraits as their health was deteriorating over the years.

Have you ever gone to a camp or summer school? I attended a summer sports clinic for swimming when I was 9.

What was your favourite cartoon as a child? Spongebob. Fairly OddParents was a very very very close second because it was just as funny as Spongebob.

What was your biggest fear as a child? Introducing myself. I always got bullied for my name and got called a tomboy/boy for it more than once, so I was conditioned to be nervous whenever I had to introduce myself and say my own name.

Would you rather be able to fly or breathe underwater? Fly, so I can travel anywhere hah.

What about invisibility or mindreading? Probably invisibility. There are stuff I’d discover in reading minds that I think I’m better off not knowing and I find it a tad bit invasive than being invisible.

Do you like what you see in the mirror? Sure. Just not so much these days since I never get to dress up or fix myself up anymore.

Which stereotype do you dislike the most? Offensive ones.

Can you remember all your past teachers names? There’ll be some grade-subject combos I’ve forgetten about by now, like I no longer remember my 3rd grade English teacher for one. But my memory in general is still quite impressive and I remember most of my past teachers.

Do you like talent shows? Which ones? I wouldn’t tune in to them religiously but I do love Golden Buzzer compilations from America’s/Britain’s Got Talent.

Have you ever failed an important exam? In what? Only in high school, and it was the more advanced math/science subjects that I really could not start to care for, like chemistry and calculus.

Do you find people taller than you intimidating? Kinda? Filipinos are very tiny people so whenever I meet a foreigner I always have to crane my neck all the way up and it does scare me a little bit hahaha.

Do you think you are better than people of a different country/background? Not at all.

What's your favourite thing about your country? I suppose the tourism side of it is wonderful. We’ve always been known for our hospitality, our tour guides are always so friendly and funny, we have beautiful beaches and islands, and Filipinos are generally a nice people and very easy to get along with.

What's your least favourite thing about your country? The colonization, the government, and people who continue to glorify the government as if they can’t do anything wrong.

Who is your favourite bzoinker? I have several favorite survey-makers but I’m too shy to mention them on here lol.

What websites do you have bookmarked? I have soooooooooooo many bookmarks.

Do you use bows and ribbons to decorate your gifts? I’ll stick a bow on a Christmas gift if I have one, but otherwise no. < Same, I only get real decorative for Christmas.

Do you listen to the same type of music as your parents? What type is that? Not at all. My mom is really into cheesy 80s and 90s love songs and I just can’t imagine myself listening to those on my own time lmao. My dad doesn’t have much of a music taste.

What TV show scared you as a kid? Mr. Meaty. What the fuck was that. < HAHAHAHAHAHA this fucking show. That was such a mess; I never understood it but I found it so hilarious. Anyway, I don’t think I was scared of any show as a kid.

Family Guy, The Simpsons or South Park? Why? The Simpsons. Family Guy’s jokes can sometimes go too far, and isn’t South Park just blatantly offensive? The humor in The Simpsons is just right for me.

[giny-weasley]

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? Probably my friend Lauren 2. Are you outgoing or shy? Outgoing 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? Nathan 4. Are you easy to get along with? Yes, without a doubt 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? If they were around, yes. 6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Kind people that I see the world in, even if they don’t see it themselves 7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? No clue. And I’m really trying not to be hopeful. 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? A disastrous mix of my current crush and two of my exes 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? More than I wish it did 10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Lauren, as always 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? ‘Love you too’  12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? If the World was Ending, Changes, Holding Hands, Matches, Into You 13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? Not at all 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? Yes but I also believe in karma.  15. What good thing happened this summer? I took the space I needed 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Hopefully not, but I don’t trust my heart, my mind, my body, or alcohol. 17. Do you think there is life on other planets? Most certainly 18. Do you still talk to your first crush? Most definitely. I’m on speaking terms with all my major crushes and exes, is this not a normal thing? 19. Do you like bubble baths? On occasion  20. Do you like your neighbors? No comment 21. What are your bad habits? Picking my face, doesn’t help with the body positivity at all 22. Where would you like to travel? Everywhere I haven’t been and everywhere I have. 23. Do you have trust issues? I don’t think so.  24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Texting my friends 25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? Chin or stomach 26. What do you do when you wake up? Make tea and start on work 27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Usually not, but sometimes darker 28. Who are you most comfortable around? The people I love the most and often can’t tell them why 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Well only one evenly partly broke up with me, but yes. Of course. 30. Do you ever want to get married? I don’t have an opinion atm. 31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? Yes 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Megan Fox 33. Spell your name with your chin. xkdffz 34. Do you play sports? What sports? volleyball I guess 35. Would you rather live without TV or music? easy, without tv 36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? a hundred times, yes 37. What do you say during awkward silences? meow 38. Describe your dream girl/guy? sweet, open about emotions, balances my happiness with their own 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? target and Ikea 40. What do you want to do after high school? college? 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? yes 42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? something is on my mind and I want someone to ask me about it 43. Do you smile at strangers? sometimes 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? outer space 45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? tea and sun and hope 46. What are you paranoid about? hurting the people I love 47. Have you ever been high? yes 48. Have you ever been drunk? yes 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? nothing I want NO ONE to know 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? forest green 51. Ever wished you were someone else? of course, I'm a woman 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? my FOMO 53. Favourite makeup brand? Laura mercier 54. Favourite store?  55. Favourite blog? Lucy Moon 56. Favourite colour? red 57. Favourite food? lamb vindaloo 58. Last thing you ate? ice cream 59. First thing you ate this morning? eggs and avocado 60. Ever won a competition? For what? soccer I guess 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? no 62. Been arrested? For what? no 63. Ever been in love? unfortunately 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? sat outside on a red bench before class, a short kiss, but an exhilarating one 65. Are you hungry right now? no 66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? both 67. Facebook or Twitter? facebook 68. Twitter or Tumblr? Tumblr 69. Are you watching tv right now? no 70. Names of your bestfriends? Lauren, Anna, Vivian, Claire  71. Craving something? What? yes, people 72. What colour are your towels? mostly white 72. How many pillows do you sleep with? two 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? not anymore 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? I know, one. 75. Favourite animal? sea otters, they wrap their tails togethers so they don’t drift away while they sleep 76. What colour is your underwear? blue 77. Chocolate or Vanilla? vanilla 78. Favourite ice cream flavour? anything with caramel 79. What colour shirt are you wearing? grey 80. What colour pants? cheetah print 81. Favourite tv show? psych 82. Favourite movie? life of Walter Mitty 83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? there’s a 2? 84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? mean girls 85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? emo girl 86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? dory 87. First person you talked to today? Amy  88. Last person you talked to today? Amy 89. Name a person you hate? no one 90. Name a person you love? my brother 91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? not particularly 92. In a fight with someone? not as far as I know 93. How many sweatpants do you have? one 94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? two 95. Last movie you watched? inception, great movie 96. Favourite actress? carrie fisher 97. Favourite actor? Robert downey jr. 98. Do you tan a lot? no 99. Have any pets? cato 100. How are you feeling? okay 101. Do you type fast? yes 102. Do you regret anything from your past? nothing completely  103. Can you spell well? yes, spelling bee champ 104. Do you miss anyone from your past? of course 105. Ever been to a bonfire party? yep 106. Ever broken someone’s heart? yep 107. Have you ever been on a horse? yeah 108. What should you be doing? sleeping 109. Is something irritating you right now? not really 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? most definitely, like an emptiness in your stomach, like a train running over your head, like a hammer to the heart 111. Do you have trust issues? only when it comes to trusting myself 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? probably my friend Claire, though I don’t think she knows this 113. What was your childhood nickname? se-se, bc my brother couldn’t pronounce my name 114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? yes 115. Do you play the Wii? a long time ago 116. Are you listening to music right now? of course  117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? not against it 118. Do you like Chinese food? definitely 119. Favourite book? book thief 120. Are you afraid of the dark? no 121. Are you mean? not usually 122. Is cheating ever okay? the short answer is no 123. Can you keep white shoes clean? definitely not 124. Do you believe in love at first sight? no 125. Do you believe in true love? depends on your definition 126. Are you currently bored? slightly 127. What makes you happy? friends and coffee and being productive and helping people 128. Would you change your name? yes 129. What your zodiac sign? pisces 130. Do you like subway? no 131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? probably date them for a bit before dumping them in a horrible breakup, as per my track record 132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? Lauren 133. Favourite lyrics right now? ‘all my friends are way too drunk to save me from my phone, so im sorry if I say something I mean’ 134. Can you count to one million? yes 135. Dumbest lie you ever told? can’t remember 136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? closed 137. How tall are you? 5, 8 138. Curly or Straight hair? wavy? 139. Brunette or Blonde? brunette 140. Summer or Winter? summer 141. Night or Day? night 142. Favourite month? august 143. Are you a vegetarian? no 144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? darkkkkk 145. Tea or Coffee? coffee 146. Was today a good day? yes 147. Mars or Snickers? snickers 148. What’s your favourite quote? ‘everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about. be kind. always’ 149. Do you believe in ghosts? yes 150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? book too farrrr

[confusedinfj]

The INFJ'S Guidebook to People: Spotting Entps

So you've tried typing by the letters and by the cognitive functions. Now you're looking to verify your typing makes sense. What are some key attritubes you should be looking for...?

A real entp is...

Not super Extraverted. Like enfps, their first function isn't about people, it's about possibilities.

Able to be mistyped as an Extraverted thinker. They like to 'think' out loud, or so it seems. They're actually just showing off. Alternatively, you're hearing their Ne. You'll be able tell the difference if you ask them for their opinion and then realise how much quieter they are.

Afraid of upsetting people. Can be easily manipulated on occasion.

Not sure of what they're feeling. Able to be convinced they're feeling anything.

Able to be excited about anything. Tell them they'd make a good doctor and watch them plan their lives as a doctor.

Usually highly intelligent.

Involved in way too many things at once.

Probably stressed because of all the things they're doing.

Accidentally flirting with everyone. They love banter, so it doesn't mean they actually like the person they're flirting with. Unlikely to lead someone on though because it's obviously playful.

Bad at remembering things. Able to throw a tantrum and then forget they did it.

Annoying. Probably the most annoying of the types in that everyone finds them annoying.

A sticky beak. They have FOMO bad.

Kind hearted. Even when they're annoying they mean well.

Liked by everyone.

Loyal.

Fond of a good bargain.

Not fussy. Happy to sleep on a bed off the side of the road.

Fussy. Just because their headphones are broken doesn't mean they're going to get new ones. They're still the best headphones ever. Also, their clothes may be all over the floor, but don't you dare put them back in the wrong spot.

Pretty happy and oblivious as kids. They often get in trouble for arguing, and then make it worse by arguing why they shouldn't get in trouble.

Rational. They like weighing up pros and cons and using reason to determine the best cause of action (Ti)

Romantic. Entps see so many possibilities and prefer not to filter their dreams through logic. You'll find that your entp friend probably has hundreds of romantic dreams they're keeping to themselves, whether it's running a farm or ruling the world.

Kind of lonely. Like enfps, most people like them, but they don't really have any close friends.

A dangerous driver. They like to speed and will justify their speeding. Just for my husband's sake, I would like to point out that it's not just him. I have another entp friend who likes to drive at 200km/h on Freeways, and another who ruins a car every other month. I actually can't believe all entps aren't dead because of their bad driving.

Sadly, a natural lawyer. They will argue about anything as if they're in a court of law, even personal matters.

Probably not aware that they're lonely.

Blunt without realising it. May really upset you without trying.

Often not aware of people being mean to them. People often mistakenly think they're patient when they are just oblivious.

Oblivious. Probably won't notice they upset you. You'll need to tell them. They will try to argue it away, so you'll need to be forthright. When they finally understand how upset you were they'll probably cry. Tertiary Fe being triggered brings on tears.

Usually pretty easy to calm down if they are stressed or crying. Since they're still rationals they like advice when they're upset.

Over defensive. Entps are often oblivious when people are mean to them, but they're also not good at telling when you're NOT being mean to them. This leads them to take offence at random things and be overly defensive about it because they feel attacked.

Messy and disorganised. Usually clean. Likely to obsessively organise one drawer when stressed, ignoring the rest of their messy house (inferior Si).

Good at taking constructive criticism. Or just criticism. Entps genuinely want to grow personally.

Argumentative. But more in a bickering kind of style, in that they just LOVE arguing about anything for no good reason. Tip: if an entp starts arguing over something stupid with you, tell them they're arguing. They will argue they're not and won't even realise the irony for a good five minutes. 😂

Usually quiet.

LOUD. there is no in-between for an entp. They get louder as they get more excited and happy.

Always working on some strange puzzle.

Sometimes creating weird puzzles. For example, my husband went through a stage where everything he would put in the calendar was in some code. The only problem was when he forgot one or two of them I had no clue what he had meant either. (and when I say code, it was like, 'I have the dentist on Monday. The dentist's name is Gordon, like the tank engine, and Gordon the tank engine is green. Green reminds me of lettuce, which is in the story of rapunzel. So imma write down rapunzel).

Soft. Even if they don't cry in public, they might tear up easily.

Big criers.

A type that naturally seems to have a bit of adhd.

A good judge of character. Sometimes they can be over optimistic though, because they really want to like everyone.

Suddenly overwhelmed. Entps will take on more and more AND MORE until... MELT DOWN. This looks like tears and losing track of everything all at once. May bring about spectacular failure if damage control doesn't occur quickly.

Things an entp might say...

'that's a cute dog. I'd like to get a dog one day. What kind of dog should I get? I don't know, I don't know any dog breeds. I think I'd name it Harold though. Only if it was a boy. Otherwise it would be Charlie...' or any other stream of consciousness monologue (Ne)

Anything that baits you into a debate. Eg, 'isn't it great how Trump wants to build a wall?'

Anything that baits you into bickering. Eg, 'I didn't say that'.

'I don't know', with regards to their opinion or feelings. This is a bad sign if it is followed by a pause, because it means they do know, they just don't want to tell you. If they really don't know it will be followed by a list of potential reasons.

'You say I annoyed you at precisely 2.15 pm. If this is the case, then why did you laugh at my joke at 2.16pm?' or any other legal speak during a personal argument.

'Do you know Hitler introduced a similar law to the one I'm breaking now? This law is evil and I don't have to follow it for that reason' or similar.

An extremely ambitious ambition such as, 'one day I'll own the moon'

Anything sad said cheerfully. For example, my husband once cheerfully told me about his friend in grade five. He finished with, 'anyway, he's dead now'.

A story that they've started half way through. They forgot the first half was in their head.

Anything annoying.

Something sweet with heart eyes.

An example of a rational but romantic entp - Tom Holland