#but I also don’t need to find a new dentist and figure it all out

[hafwen]

I called my dentist today about my crown because I still wasn't sure if they were going to cover it or not

When I called at first they said no. But when I said I had it for only 13 months and then asked if that was normal she put me on hold.

The dentist has agreed to do it for free as a “courtesy”

[daycourtofficial]

The Shadows Want You to be Happy

Summary: Azriel’s shadows overhear a conversation where you doubt Azriel’s true intentions, and they urge him to rectify the situation.

Author’s note: this is just pure fluff baby! Pure unadulterated fluff. Go to the dentist! Also I didn’t proofread this, so enjoy at your own caution!

His shadows didn’t mean to spy on you, they promise. They just liked keeping an eye on you at all times.

Azriel had no idea why his shadows seemed to adore you so much - well, he could understand it, because he adored you just as much as his shadows did. But he can’t figure out why - they don’t like being around Elain, but most of the others the shadows just watch.

Not you, though. Whenever you two are in the same room his shadows roam over you, greeting an old friend. If he’s been away for a days on a mission, they spend several minutes swirling around you, seemingly doting on you, like they’re asking “are you okay? Did you eat while we were gone? Did you sleep?”

A few shadows have taken it upon themselves to stay stationed with you at all times. He thinks they have a schedule, out of jealousy and need to share their time with you, but they don’t really tell him too much about what they see. The most they’ll tell him is if you haven’t eaten in a while or that time they told him about you having a cold and not wanting anyone to find out. He spent three days in your apartment with you, feeding you soup and taking care of you.

His shadows absolutely do not tell him the things you say or how you’re feeling, or so he thought. Both of the shadows that were asking as your bodyguards came to him, like little kids with a story to tell.

-

You were laying on the couch in the library with Feyre, engrossed in your independent books. The two of you do this weekly, enjoying each other’s presence without much social obligation. Sometimes the two of you will talk, but it’s often followed by long, comfortable silences. Just when you thought the silence was going to stay for a while, Feyre spoke up.

“so, sweetie, how are things with you and Azriel?” She asks, closing her book to turn to you.

Your cheeks heat immediately. “Um,” you say, closing your book to turn to her, knowing that she won’t relent until she gets what she wants out of this conversation.

You had kept your feelings for him mostly to yourself, except one drunken night a few weeks ago you had told Feyre about how pretty he was. You thought she might have forgotten about it, but this conversation is telling you she wants more. Thank the mother it wasn’t Rhys or Cas you had told that to - they would have mocked your word choice of “devastatingly pretty” for years.

“Well, we have plans to go out tonight,” you reply, very nervous about opening up to Feyre. She looked at you, her face asking for you to continue. “We’re trying all of the bakeries in Velaris to see who has the best pastries and hot chocolate, so once a week we try a new one and gorge ourselves on baked goods and chocolate.”

Feyre smiled at how absolutely adorable that was. “Are these… dates?” she asks, smiling at how absolutely oblivious the two of you were.

“We call them dates,” you reply.

“Do you two do anything physical? You don’t have to be gratuitous with details, I’m not Mor.” Feyre says, shuddering thinking of Mor grilling you for details on if the two of you have had sex yet.

“Um well the bakeries are usually cozy so we usually are tucked away in a corner, pressed up together. In one of them we had to wait for a table, so he just wrapped his wings around me while we waited.” You told her, grinning at the memory of his body heat.

“Do you two ever kiss?”

You sink a little further into the couch, your cheeks blazing with heat now, your hands covering your face as you say, “yes”.

“Has there been more than kissing?”

Feyre watches the head hiding behind youe hands nod ever so slightly and squeals. She actually squeals.

The people of Velaris love to gossip with her, and when she heard rumors of two of her friends being spotted around town looking very coupley, she decided to investigate. It also doesn’t help that the Inner Circle has a betting pool on when you ans Azriel will get together. Her bet was this week, so she’s doing what she can to win. And because she wants the two of you to be happy. And because Cassian bet that you two would be together next week, and she can’t lose to him, his gloating is atrocious.

“So, you two are together?” She asks, practically bouncing in her seat.

“I’m not sure,” you say, “honestly I’m a little worried that this means more to me than it does to him.” You look down at your hands, “I don’t really do casual dating, and I’m a little worried that this is just a fling to him. It’s really incredible and hot and sweet and all but.” You look around to see if anyone is listening before you whisper, “honestly, it would break my heart if this was just casual for him.”

Feyre was shocked at how sad you looked at the idea of being something casual to Az. She knew the two of you were head over heels for each other, they all knew that, but you looked devastated.

“Sweetie,” she says, trying her best to console you, “there is no way that that male views you or anything to do with you as ‘casual’.“

“Are you sure?” You ask, hesitation lacing your every word.

“Absolutely. He lights up whenever you’re around and I’ve never seen him miss a function you’re at.”

You thank your friend for the reassurances and settle back into your respective books. You knew that Azriel’s shadows often followed you around, even without him being anywhere nearby. He once told you that they find you adorable. However, you didn’t realize that the two who were stationed with you left very quickly after your discussion with Feyre.

-

The shadows relayed the whole story to him, in part because they, like the inner circle, want the two of you together. But also because they understand that you were upset and Azriel could fix it.

Azriel was more shocked at the insistence from them to make you less upset - usually they are just uninvolved observers, simply passing along information to him, allowing him to draw his own conclusions. The way those shadows spoke to him you’d think that they were in charge of him.

He met you outside of your apartment later that night, dressed in an all black casual outfit. “Ready?” He asks, extending his arm out for you to take. You lock the door behind him, straightening your coat before taking his arm.

The two of you start these dates off by walking through Velaris. Winter has just begun and there’s a light falling of snow covering the two of you.

“What’d you get up to today? I haven’t seen you since breakfast,” he asks you, not-so-subtly reminding you that you were, in fact, his breakfast, before he left your apartment this morning.

“I spent most of the day in the library with Feyre, reading a few books, doing some research. I had to get out of there, the words were all starting to blend together,” you reply, nuzzling into his arm to retain some of his heat, despite his jacket covering his arms.

“Mm, well then I guess you could consider me you’re handsome knight, off to whisk you away for an evening of delicacies in your time of need,” he retorts.

You chuckle and begin to speak, not stopping yourself before blurting, “why are you only like this with me? Don’t get me wrong, I love this side of you, but you only show it to me. Why’s that?”

Azriel stops your walk to stand in front of you, “ignoring your recent declaration of love,” you huff, “I just.. feel different around you.”

The look he’s giving you makes your knees go weak. He’s looking into your eyes with deep, raw honesty, like he wants you to see inside his soul.

“I love my family, despite their best efforts to annoy me into murdering them,” he says. You giggle. “But you’re.. different. The way I feel about you is different. I thought I loved Mor, but I didn’t. I loved the idea of saving her, of being her knight.” He sighs, unbelieving that he’s spilling all of this to you out in public. Luckily the other pedestrians just ignore the two of you, out of kindness or fear of him, he’s not sure. He pulls you into a quiet little alley, in the hopes to retain some privacy.

“It was stupid, but I thought I could save the girl and we’d live happily ever after. Then I met you. When I was a kid, I always wanted someone to come rescue me, and I thought that that was how you fall in love. But it’s not. I didn’t need to save you to love you. After this big revelation about myself, I took some time to really think about what I want. It’s why a few weeks back everyone thought I went to check on the war camps. Well, I did check on them, but I spent most of the time thinking. And I want you, no rescuing required. Though if you’d have me, I’d rescue you from anything. A bad day, my annoying family, the flu, anything. I’m not sure how clear my intentions have been, I figured showing you off around Velaris was enough, but I guess not.”

He paused, a mixture of nerves and intense determination radiating off of him.

“I haven’t thought about another person since I met you. I haven’t even considered looking at anyone else. Rhys has started calling me a puppy, because I follow you around everywhere, and I don’t care. I’ve never been so public with anyone, not giving a damn who sees or what they think, because I want them to know that you’re with me. I want everything you’ll give me.”

You’re stunned. It’s so quiet, you can hear the snow falling. It’s as if the world has gone silent to hear what you’ll say.

“Anything I’ll give you?” You say, a smirk crossing your face, wanting to draw out his confession a bit more.

“Anything.”

“Even if I snore?” You ask.

He laughs, “you don’t snore. You’re actually quite adorable when you’re asleep, hate to break it to you.”

“Hmm,” you say, stroking your finger on your chin, looking quizzical. “Guess you’ll just have to get used to my adorable sleeping, because if you’re accepting it, I’m giving you everything.”

He leans down, capturing your laugh with his lips, his shadows dancing around the two of you in excitement.

He pulls away after several minutes, laughing at the groan coming from your lips, “did you know that the idiots have a bet about us?”

He begins again after seeing your confused face, “If we’re together this week, Feyre wins the betting pool. Next week is Cassian.”

“Oh!” You exclaim, “that’s why she wanted us to be together so badly! Hm, maybe we should let Feyre win, because Cassian would be-

“Unbearable.” You both say in unison.

“When should we tell them? And how?” You ask.

“Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow we can just have sex on the dining room table, that’ll send the message loud and clear.” He says, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

You swat his arm, “no, we’re better than Cassian and Nesta. Maybe we should have a banner made. It’ll say “we had sex!” And point down to us.”

He chuckles, grabbing your arm again and steering you towards the bakery, as the two of you contemplate how to tell your family the news that will make them all so incredibly happy.

[natashaslesbian]

Oh! Scarlett introduces R to her colleagues (at the outset or Marvel set) and she gets a bit shy so R sticks by her mom

Mamas Girl

Word Count: 988

————

Today was the annual ‘bring your kid to work day’ on the marvel set, the filming of Endgame had been taking place for a few months and finally a date had been set for all the actors to bring their kids with them for the day. You had managed to avoid all the previous meetings, saying you needed to study or that you had a headache. You had met most of the cast on a few occasions by now, that wasn’t the problem, it was the amount of people that caused the hair to rise on the back of your neck. You were also the oldest kid, being in your early teens while the rest were toddlers, it’s not like you could hang out with them. You had tried so hard to get out of this day, but your mom pushed every problem aside. She even moved the dentist appointment you made yourself to next week so you could come to set, you just didn’t want to upset her by saying you’d rather not go.

You arrived at 11:30am and most of the cast had already arrived for the day. You stuck close by your mom as she said her hellos and just politely waved when they acknowledged you. “Come on sweetie there’s a few new people I wanna introduce you to” Scarlett said as she pulled you out of her trailer with her. You stuck closely by your mom as the two of you made your way through the set. “Y/n this is Chris Pratt, Chris this is my daughter” Scarlett said introducing you to yet another Chris “ah the little Johansson, pleasure to meet you” he said as he extended his hand “hi” you mumbled shaking his hand in greeting. “Oh there’s Joe, I just need to speak to the director hunny I’ll be back in a minute” Scarlett said as she began to walk away “wait can I come with you?” You called after her “I won’t be long y/n, I think Lizzie’s around if you want to find her” your mom called back.

You wanted to run after your mom but your feet were stuck to the ground. “So” Chris said awkwardly “how old are you y/n” he politely asked “14” you mumbled shyly, scanning the room for any sign of someone safe, preferably your mom. “I think Scarlett will be back in a second, sorry I’ve gotta run to makeup, it was nice meeting you” Chris said excusing himself from the awkward situation. You felt your legs begin to shake as you continued to search the room for your mom, a few cast members flashed you small smiles but you just ignored their gazes. “Hey kiddo” a voice called from behind you, you thanked the stars when you realised it was Lizzie. “Hi Elizabeth” you quietly said as she led you to a nearby couch “you waiting for your mom?” She said “and you can call me Lizzie by the way” she bumped your arm. You nodded politely and began biting your finger nails.

Lizzie attempted to make some small talk with you but as she figured it was more of a one sided conversation. “Lizzie!” Scarlett beamed as she came back over to you both “its great to see you” she said as the two said hello with a hug. You allowed the two a brief catch up while you came to your mom’s side, the anxiety finally subsiding. “Alright sweetie I’m not needed for a little while so you wanna go back to my trailer?” Scarlett asked you “yes please” you said. The two of you said goodbye to Lizzie and made your way back to Scarlett’s trailer. You held on tightly to her hand as you danced through the crowds. “You ok y/n?” Scarlett said when you grabbed her hand, you simply nodded. “Hey talk to me little bear” she cooed as she opened the door to her trailer.

“I’m sorry” you whispered as your mom led you towards the couch “there’s just a lot of people here that I don’t know” you mumbled. “Oh sweetie” Scarlett said as she cuddled up with you “I’m sorry I should’ve realised it might be too much for you” she said. “I don’t mean to be like this, I’m sorry” you sighed “hey stop apologising” Scarlett said as she gentle brushed your hair from your face “there’s nothing wrong with being a little shy you know” she cooed. “How do you do it, all the people you have to talk to?” You asked, avoiding her gaze. “Well I guess I’ve been doing it for so long I don’t really think about it anymore” Scarlett said “but I still get nervous sometimes. I know it probably looks like I’m really outgoing but it’s just part of my job, I’d much rather be curled up with you all day” your mom said, lifting your chin up to meet her gaze.

You leaned into Scarlett’s embrace and gently closed your eyes “love you mama” you said as you buried your face in her neck “I love you too my little bear” Scarlett kissed your forehead. Your nap was short lived as your mom gently shook you awake “baby I’ve gotta go makeup do you wanna come with me?” She asked. You groaned as you tried to pull her back to cuddling you “wanna stay here with you mommy” you mumbled sleepily. “Me too sweetheart but mommy has to work” Scarlett said giving your tummy a soft tickle “you can sit with me the whole time I promise, even on mamas lap if you want too” your mom teased. “I’m not a baby” you pouted “well you’re my baby” Scarlett said as she helped you to your feet. “My shy little baby, you know I wouldn’t want you any other way than yourself” she said as she kissed your forehead. “Mom don’t be so soppy” you laughed.

————

Taglist<3

@saraaahsstuff / @dannipotatoo / @tobiaslut / @a-simpfortessa-lesbriean / @marvelnatasha12346 / @yelenasdiary / @mousetheorist / @ashadash0904

[strawberry-metal]

Found out yesterday that my psychiatrist has been fucking me up for at least a year now. One of the pills she prescribed me to be on has bad effects with three other pills I’m on, increases suicidal thoughts despite being an anti depressant, and now I have to slowly wean myself off of it and get a new psychiatrist. I still have to take my anxiety meds despite the bad effects the two have with eachother. (I’m also trying to wean myself off of taking two trazodone and only take one. )

You’re supposed to be able to trust doctors, and they’re supposed to care and pay attention to what they’re giving you and what you’re already on. This could be part of why I’ve been so damn miserable.

I also need to get a new dentist, dental insurance, and somehow get in before my gums grow over my tooth that my crown fell off of for the 5th time now. But I also never have money anymore. I don’t even have any to spend for myself most the time and I even went into the negatives this month before I got paid today. But I have therapy today and that’s already $120 being taken from me. And THEN I still have the brain scan on Thursday to try and figure out what the hell is wrong with me and my reaction to sounds now.

My life has seriously just been a downward spiral since 2020. I’m so drained and just tired of it all. I’ve lost friends, a LARGE amount of loved ones have passed on, I had to put up with narcissistic abuse twice, I have trust issues now, my mental state is just at the bottom of the ocean now and I just don’t wanna do anything but stay in bed like, forever. I feel like I’m not in control of my life anymore.

But somehow I have to find the strength to keep moving on. There’s just gotta be an end to this shit eventually. There are still beautiful things I want to live and fight for.

[adora721]

Mental health tips

🌻DISCLAIMER: I AM NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR ABOUT ANYTHING IN THIS POST BEFORE ACTING ON IT.

November 25, 2024

So, I’ve been dealing with clinical depression for about two years now. I’m not currently on medication, but I won’t rule it out if things get worse. A year ago, I met a retired older woman at church who is on medication. We’ve become close friends because of our mutual time spent in what she calls, “The Pit.” IYKYK.

As a progressive Christian, I feel the need to state that I’m progressive, it’s been frustrating trying to get support from the church. Although the people who know about my mental health issue are kind and express empathy, their advice has been lackluster. Not one could refer me to a trained therapist, but they can give me ten thousand referrals to dentists. Some offer quotes like, “Just give it to God.” or “Trust in God to give you the peace that passes all understanding.” Others, I suspect, think I’ve committed some sin that brought this on me. Thankfully, last summer, a friend from New Jersey introduced me to his cousin. She’s a Doctor of Pharmacy, who lives with depression and took medication. She is also a church member, who doesn’t assume my depression is a personal failing.

BTW: A mental health issue is NOT a personal failure or sin.

Because of the lack of support, I’ve made it my mission to do what I can for myself. Below are the things that have helped me to improve. When possible, I’ve provided one or more links to Pubmed.gov or other trustworthy sources that support the use of the tactic. You might already know to eat a diet high in unprocessed foods and to exercise, but below are things that might also help.

Massage – once a month, if affordable or free, if you have a partner or friend willing to do it

Warm bath or warm foot bath – 2 times a week for 20 minutes each; add Epsom salt and aromatherapy oils to make it a spa treatment

Forest bathing (being out in nature) – 20 minutes each day.

Sunlight (even in winter) – 30 minutes a day; bonus is that it helps a bit with hormone balance.

Get a therapist – If affordable, I highly recommend a therapist. Having someone who is empathetic, objective, and trained to deal with your issue is such a Godsend. My insurance covers therapy, but there are online options to find an affordable therapist, even if just for one session a month.

Calcium (Ca) – I don’t eat much dairy (gives me zits), so I take Now Red Mineral Algae calcium. To help calcium go where it’s needed and not end up in the blood vessels, I also take boron, D3 (2000 IU), and vitamin K2 as MK4 and MK7 (100 mcg). I take the calcium (and its supporting supplements) in divided doses of 500 mg of calcium two times a day for a total of 1000 mg of calcium. Strontium citrate also helps with calcium absorption; but the research I found said to take it two hours before or after taking calcium. A bonus from taking this calcium has been reduced menstrual cramps. Yay! Edited to add: Vitamin K is fat soluble; so take it with a meal that has some fat in it.

Magnesium (Mg) – I take the oxide form in divided doses with calcium for a total of 400 mg of magnesium a day. Bonus is that Mg keeps you regular 😊.

Vitamin T (touch) – hugs, hand holding, and other forms of caring touch help. Just 10 to 20 seconds of hugging can improve your mood.

Lower your histamine levels – This one is a bit weird. I started having sensitivity or negative reactions to many healthy foods I’ve eaten for years. These include avocado, tomato, citrus, fermented foods, chocolate (ugh! ☹) and more. Turns out I had developed a histamine intolerance. One of the ways to lower histamine is vitamin C, but I had to avoid citrus fruits. So, I take magnesium ascorbate powder from Source Naturals. The studies said 2000 mg of vitamin C lower histamine in the body. I take 2K twice a day (4000 mg total) .You might have to build up to that amount. Also, it took trial and error to figure out what kind of vitamin C worked for me. There’s also a diamine oxidase (DAO) supplement you can buy; it’s pricey, but I only take once in a while or when I eat out. Seriously, the extra vitamin C keeps my histamine levels closer to normal for less cost.

Undermethylation – Another oddity. Finding out about my histamine issues led me to learn about undermethylation and MTHFR. Because of this, I had to be careful of taking in too much folate (natural form in foods) or folic acid (synthetic form in enriched foods). Undermethylators, like myself, trap folate in the body instead of converting it to its active, methylated form. Because of this, that trapped folate lowers my serotonin level. Since I eat a high plant-based diet, I had to kick high folate foods out of my diet. When I have salads, it’s iceberg lettuce for me. I do still eat enough folate; I just stick closer to the 400 mcg levels. I do not react well to the methylated forms of B vitamins, like methyl folate or methyl B12. I take an adenosylcobalamin and hydroxocobalamin (combo) for B12 from the Seeking Health brand.

Salicylate intolerance – One more odd thing. I’m now sensitive to foods high in this compound, which increased my inflammation. I’ve also found out that I had low iron levels, which also increases inflammation. That inflammation might contribute to depression. I have reduced foods high in salicylate and added supplemental iron. Doing this has lowered my inflammation as shown on my recent C-reactive protein high sensitivity test. I also use the No-Fenol enzyme supplement by Houston Enzymes when I can't avoid eating moderate or high-salicylate foods. The Cleure brand has skin and hair care products that are salicylate-free.

Microbiome (gut bacteria) – There’s some evidence that eating probiotic foods is helpful in mood disorders. The problem for me is that fermented foods are very high in histamine. Taking the vitamin C has helped me to put a few ounces of foods like kefir, raw sauerkraut, kombucha, and yogurt back into my diet. I eat A2 kefir and yogurt (goat, sheep, and some A2-producing cows). And, of course, fiber is your microbiome’s BFF, especially soluble fiber from fruits and vegetables.

Self-talk – Learn to practice positive, compassionate self-talk. What you say to yourself about you and your world matters. No need to deny reality but refocus on what you have to be grateful for, speak hopeful words, watch, read, and do things that lift you up or make you laugh. And watch what you say to others; you never know what someone is going through.

Final tip: Remove from your life, if it’s safe to do that, anyone or anything that worsens your mental health and find better people and things to add. You’ll know who these people are because you’ve expressed your distress about how they mistreat you, but they refuse to change. Bid them adieu and love them from afar.

I hope you get the support you need and know that you are needed in this world. God bless! 🌻

[anotherwonderfulmistake]

Dear Anxiety,

I know you mean well. Really, I do. You want to protect me, right? Just like you did when we were kids.

Like when you’d hold my hand and pull me back when I’d get too close to an edge. I’d rip my hand out of yours and play along the line of recklessness and injury anyway, too busy being curious to listen to your warnings. Like when you taught me to grab the handrail when I use stairs to avoid a bad tumble. ‘But it slows me down!’ I’d tell you, barreling thoughtlessly towards a sprained ankle that still reminds me, twenty years later, what it’s like to crash down a flight of stairs. Like when you taught me how to tell when a horse is about to bite me. Or kick me. Like when you taught me that having a tooth pulled out hurts, and the dentist pulls out teeth, so the dentist is out to hurt us and we need to escape him at all costs.

Like when you taught me that being whacked in the face by a jump rope at full speed hurts like absolute hell, and we should never try jump rope at recess ever again. I was stubborn. I didn’t listen to that one. I’d keep trying, and keep getting whacked in the face.

Like when you taught me that stumbling over my words while reading something aloud in class causes mass hilarity amongst my peers. You told me to never speak again in class. I didn’t understand why.

Like when I told jokes, made gifts for my friends, asked to play with them, and was met with blank stares, side eyes, and silence.

I was a stubborn child. A naive, blind, foolish child. All these years you had been warning me, but I had been too busy being a child to see. But when I finally understood that there was no cousin called Max, that it had been me all along they had been calling fat, ugly, stupid, boring, weird, everything suddenly sharpened into focus. Laughter was cruel. Humiliating. I stopped speaking in class. Eventually, I stopped speaking everywhere. You taught me to erase myself, because no one can laugh at me if they don’t remember I exist. You also taught me to ignore the sharp pain of being forgotten. You taught me so well that it became nothing more than a dull ache. It made its home in my joints, around my ligaments, melded with the calcium in my bones, pulsated along with my growing pains.

You taught me to fear loud noises, because they angered my mother, so I learned to be as quiet as a person could be. I learned to find solace in my headphones. You taught me that people get impatient and irritated when I struggle—or worse, they laugh, so I learned to never learn anything new in front of anyone, because people don’t like it when I’m not immediately good at something. It frustrates them. It bothers them. You taught me that when my parents argue, it is always about something I did wrong, so I learned to listen to their shouting matches, because that way, I could figure out what not to do. You taught me that tears bring nothing but contempt and belittling, that needing help is wrong, because ‘you’re smart, honey, you should be able to figure this out on your own’, so I learned to swallow it down, be strong, smile, wear red clothes to hide the blood, and I learned how to be alone.

I was born in a game in which everyone knew the rules but me, the floor was a minefield, and any wrong step would lead to my pulverization. You were the only one kind enough to hold my hand and teach me how to avoid the mines. You taught me survival and adaptation. You taught me how to hold pain in my bones and anger in my muscles, how to stitch a pleasant smile onto the rotting face underneath, how to hold my voice steady when all I want to do is scream.

You wanted to protect me and you did, Anxiety. You really did. You kept me alive. I will always be thankful for that.

… but I’m not walking a minefield anymore. The game is no longer life or death, win or lose. Life is no longer a game, it just is. I am not alone anymore. You do not need to protect me anymore.

And yet you are still here, and your embrace is no longer warm—

It is threatening—

Like claws sinking into the back of my neck—

Like a snake tightening around my chest—

And you make me feel like a bird in a cage. I can see my wings, I know I can fly, I see others fly, soar amongst the clouds, and I want to go with them, feel the freedom, the wind in my feathers, the sun on my face, but I am shackled to the ground.

I have lived alone for three years, and I still flinch, still get short of breath, my heart still starts hammering beneath my rib cage when my utensil drawer closes loudly, or when I drop a pot, or when I forget to keep my front door from slamming shut. I still wait for my mother’s ire. Silence terrifies me. I cannot leave my apartment without headphones. The very idea of it makes my eyes zone in and out of focus, makes me shake uncontrollably, very nearly brings me to tears. It is mortifying. I have stopped learning anything new, because nothing is worth learning if I am not naturally good at it. It is not worth doing if I am not the best. I fucking hate that. I want to learn everything, I want to do everything, my curiosity is infinite, and I am constantly destroyed by the realization that this need of mine will never be fulfilled. It will fester behind my eyes, maggots in my brain, and I will collect pointless interests like they’re fucking pokemon. You have made me selfish. You have made me think the world revolves around me. Whenever I hear conversations around me, I listen in just in case they’re talking about me. If someone is in a mood, I ask what is wrong, but not because I care. Because I want to know if it’s my fault. If it’s something I can fix. You did such a good job at teaching me to be independent that needing help feels like a failure, makes me feel like I’m worthless. Not being alone is vertiginously frightening. Being perceived is nightmare fuel, I think I liked it better when I was utterly forgettable and invisible—

But I don’t want to be like that anymore. One cannot know the rewards of being loved without subjecting oneself to the mortifying ordeal of being known. And what’s the point in surviving if I don’t leave a handprint on the wall? In a hundred years, a thousand, a million, that handprint will be the only thing left of me. The only proof I ever existed. I should make sure every line of my fingerprints has a story. I owe it to the stardust in my veins.

I no longer know how to scream. Your hands are pressed against my mouth. The chains of my self-control are in my hands, but you are holding them closed.

I understand. I understand why you guard me so jealously, so ferociously. I understand why you snarl and bark and bite at any semblance of peacefulness. You want to survive. It’s all anything wants. Even the bad things.

But you need to let me go, because you are drowning me, and if I do not surface soon, you will have died anyway.

I know you’re scared. If you’ll let me, I’ll take you by the hand and show you the world isn’t such a scary place. I’ll teach you. Just like you taught me. Deal?

[appreciatingtokrev]

i don't remember much of the film but he had a very hard life so i can't imagine it ending on a happy note.

i think most mobile players are android but prob works better on iPhones but I've realised that I must have trapped myself with playing it on my phone forever because I saved everything with my Apple ID ;-; damn, which laptop was that and what is your current one now? I guess GI will have some limitations since it is a free game and have you tried updating the game/reinstalling it instead? I don't know much about PS5, only nintendo switch lol. which phone are you thinking of getting?

yikes, that's so bad ;-; i'm really sorry to heard that but hang in there, i hope the anxiety isn't too bad. ah but i feel like a study's buddy need a certain personality so you don't get sidetrack and start slacking off as a duo lol. i've heard it better to goes over past papers with others.

isn't switerzland more mountain based? that's true, your high school era is very long lol, well i've heard that dentists get paid lot more if they goes private but obv medicine/nursing is more rewarding/impactful. that sound complex but i was never a stem major lmao but def interesting. i think on my end, you can goes into lab testing if you study biomedical science.

i no longer listen to kpop at all so you're more of a devoted fan lol, but during my turn, i do remember plastic surgery was quite common, i don't know about now though.

i agreed that silver is appealing because it blends in with more colours, gold just naturally stand out but what do you think about rose gold?

oh nice! which characters had you tried to cosplay? what's the longest explanation video have you watched? also, have you seen anime house? edits are super fun but i know some apps watermark the edits unless you pay for a subscription.

it is shocking at how much wigs can cost a fortune. is it even real hair ? also, do you have uniqlo on your end? I do and every few months, the brand release a range of anime t-shirts, right now they are doing JJK where I brought one and I managed to get the last one for Chainsaw Man too!

ah that's true! i dk if we will have to switch to discord or something else though considering how long our messages are, i'm sure tumblr dm will crash with our essays lol.

still sounds interesting, i actually quite enjoy stuff with a sad/bad ending

oh,, i’m pretty sure you can add your email as additional log-in data for genshin somewhere? maybe on hoyolab? i’ll try to figure it out later & update you on it. there’s got to be a way bc two years ago i used to do piloting + traded some genshin accs and one of the ones i got had an apple ID AND an email address. phew, no clue what my old laptop is (i still have it.. i just. never use it lol) but my new one is actually a convertible, it’s a lenovo yoga... 4? or so. not entirely sure but something like that. i had to get it for school in summer 2021, but i quite like it. yeah, i’ve tried like everything TT. multiple times. except a clean reboot, but i don’t think i’ll do that,, currently still waiting it out and hoping adhkgdfjk. my little brother has a switch i get to use too :D tho there’s a bunch of games that only work on ps5 (or ps4 or sometimes xbox too) i’d like to play so. phones... well. my Ideal Phone does not exist bc it would be a samsung phone with a 4.7" diameter, and that.... simply does not exist. my phone rn is a samsung galaxy a3 2017 btw,, and i’m thinking of going with a samsung in either the a or s series with a diameter of 6.4" because those are the smallest ones you can find... i did think about maybe getting an iphone because they still make smaller phones (or an interely different brand) but then i realised that i have all my fic wips and a ton of other notes on google notes and i very much have to be able to access them still so.

ty, it’s managable TT my study bestie & i work together perfectly, luckily enough :D sometimes someone else joins us too but it still works nicely. they both have the motivation to keep going, and i can’t slack off if they don’t either.

i think a good half of switzerland is just the alps lol. yeah, but to be fair i’ve technically repeated before. usually it’d either be 3, 6, or rarely 7 years depending on which school you go to, but for me it’ll be 8 years now bc i switched 4 years in. still pretty long though if i think about it,, hm personally i’m hardly interested in medicine with live patients at all (that sounds horrible.... i’m just a very science guy TT) and the part that interests me about forensic pathology is the science aspect. so no clue about that stuff lol.

no clue what's going on in the kpop scene, i just listen to some songs asfjfhasj

i like rose gold! more than typical gold too. i'm just not really a fan of yellow gold.

i'm technically working on a low-cost dottore cosplay rn, and i'm also counting that low-cost kazutora cosplay i'm also still working on, so those two. haven't ever gotten to a finished cosplay sadly asfhfjask. i don't keep track of the yt videos i've watched but i'm pretty sure the longest ones i've seen should be in the 5 hour category,, you know those iceberg explanation videos? i had a phase where i'd watch a ton of them, the longer, the better, so those should be the longest ones i've seen. no, i haven't! just checked it out though, seems cool. edits and apps.... okay. i used to make gacha edits. back in 2019 to 2021. i don't think i've ever published one because i never finished any of my edits, but because of that i've had my fair share of experience with editing apps lol. all the ones i'd found always have a watermark on them, but tbh i don't really mind them on edits.

agreed. i think good wings are made from real hair, worse/cheaper ones just plastic. i've never heard of uniqlo,, i just checked google maps and the closest one is 250km away and out of country lol. so, uh no :( tho we've got an animanga store in the city i go to school at which has some merch!

maybe one day.. i'm hardly active on discord (i don't have any space for it on my phone lol who would've thought) and my phone keeps crashing anyway so... at the moment this works just fine xD though do tell me if you've got technical problems on your end, and we'll see what we can do

[onlinedentistinnoida]

Find the Best Dentist in Noida: A Comprehensive Guide

Finding the Best Dentist in noida can be a daunting task, as one needs to complete their research based on the doctor’s profile, clinic/hospital location, the total experience of the doctor, fees, and many more. We book an appointment with the doctor with undue expectations of getting the best treatment and good consultation. We want our doctors to be caring & empathetic so that we can believe in them and discuss our health issues quite easily.

The biggest reason we want to book an appointment with the Best Dentist in noida is that we want to visit a doctor who has excellent clinical expertise, which is needed to prevent, diagnose, and treat all types of dental issues such as mouth ulcers, bleeding, or swollen gums, bad breath, and guides us through oral care.

It is normal to ask friends and other family members about the Best Dentist in noida since the city is big and there are so many good health providers available, and the cost of healthcare is also high. However, it often leads to few choices bases on the favorable mentioned by friends and family members, and there is no concrete evidence to support the same. On the contrary, a good strategy would be to look online and consult a dentist.

Some platforms, such as SmartCare, have onboarded good doctors and provide online ratings by the patients for their doctors. It is a promising idea to visit such platforms and get readymade information related to doctors, clinics, hospital affiliation, languages spoken, experience, education, and treatments offered.

Furthermore, looking for a dentist on vacation or finding the best dentist in a new city can be challenging. People often seek recommendations from co-workers, neighbors, and friends. However, the best method to look for a good doctor is online, and can get a doctor best suited to their needs and situation.

Additionally, an important thing to figure out is whether the chosen dentist is sufficient to treat the health issues or if we need to book an appointment with a specialized doctor. This is because we may need a specialist who understands health needs.

It is common to know that dental treatment is not covered in the insurance plan, so looking for a dentist who is willing to accept any insurance plan and is ready to waive some fees is difficult to find, but conducting thorough research for the same can be good. This can also be discussed with the dentist only during In-clinic consultation and before the treatment.

When looking for the Best Dentist Near You, we must visit a dentist who is willing to work with a functional approach; a functional approach is the one where other than performing the regular treatment, dentists educate their patients thoroughly related to care for their teeth and consume the diet, and many more.

When I had trouble with my teeth as it was paining while chewing, my brother told me to look for a doctor on the Smartcare Platform. SmartCare Platform is an excellent platform to find the Best Dentist in noida as they have a complete list of experienced Dentists. I took a Video-consultation with Dr. Gagandeep Singh Sabharwal, associated with Sabharwal Dental Clinic. Dr. Singh is well-learned about all dental issues and has the right equipment to treat various dental problems such as smile design, tooth extraction, dental examinations, X-ray, and many more. The best thing about Dr. Singh is his treatment services. He ensures that the patient gets complete information about the problem that one is going through and what should be the way forward for them.

Furthermore, my younger sister was having trouble with her wisdom tooth, which was a painful experience; hence I wanted to book an appointment with the dentist to understand the process. I booked a consultation with Dr. Deepa Singh on SmartCare. Dr. Deepa was polite and generous in her consultancy, and she guided us well regarding the process of wisdom teeth and the dos and don’ts regarding the same.

Smartcare is a platform where one can find the Best Dentist in noida with just one click. It is an innovative cloud-based platform that helps patients book both videos and In-clinic appointments with doctors, keep patients' health records, make online payments to the doctor, take follow-ups with the doctors, and more.

Smartcare shares a simple aim to provide adequate healthcare in the field of dentistry. It has onboarded the Best Dentist in noida, who has strong expertise in treating various dental conditions such as Toothache, Sensitivity, Cavities, Root Canal, Broken teeth, Fixing Jaws, Cheeks, Filling of Gums, and more. It has a complete list of specialized doctors equally determined to provide customized treatment in a healthy environment.

Dentists associated with Smartcare are experienced in providing treatment for oral diseases. Smartcare believes in providing quality-based care, long-lasting solutions, and therapies to all patients. The complete team of Smartcare is dedicated to making your wellness our priority by onboarding experienced doctors and providing worthwhile and beneficial treatment.

[nonotnolan]

Gym Merchandise

Few experiences in life are as terrible as having to move to an entirely new town.  It was a hill that Wyatt was prepared to die on.  The move had allowed him to escape his overbearing parents, so regret wasn’t quite the right word, but... getting used to the new roads, having to meet new people, trying to figure out which stores could be trusted... it was exhausting in a way that was notably different from standing at a cash register for eight hours.

His coworkers were far too nice to help him make any sort of decisions.  “Oh, I use the dentist on 8th St, but I hear the office on 15th is also good.”  “No, I just take my car to the auto dealership for repairs, I’ve never had any reason to find a separate mechanic.”  “All of the doctors in town are pretty good, I would just pick one that’s close to you.”  If it wasn’t for Reddit, he probably would have never been able to find a good gym.

Wyatt still couldn’t believe how unanimous the advice had been.  His new city’s subreddit was a dumpster fire of angry yelp reviews and people complaining about their neighbors.  And yet, when he made a post asking people to recommend places for a new resident, everyone told him he needed to check out Friday’s Gym.  “Even if you’ve never made exercise a priority before, you should check this place out.”  To their credit, it did seem like a really nice gym-- there was an attached spa-like area with massage chairs and tanning beds, and free headphones for the regulars.

“Oh, sorry, didn’t see you there,” Wyatt said, as he accidentally bumped into a guy wearing a red tank top.  The man said nothing in response.  “Hey, are you using this bench?  I don’t really feel comfortable using those machines yet.”  The man made no reply.  Wyatt walked around the loose weights at his feet to stand in front of him, but the man in the red tank top did not even blink.  He continued to stare at a point off in the distance, with no concern for anything around him.

“Hey, are you okay?” he asked, placing a hand on his shoulder.  Wyatt couldn’t help but blush as he did so-- the man’s shoulder was impressively firm, and yet his skin was so soft and well maintained.  It was the exact sort of body he would love to have, but had never wanted to devote the time it would take to earn it.  The man shifted in place, like a large tree rustling in the breeze, but he remained unmoved.  The hairs on the back of his neck started to stand on end.  Was the man braindead, somehow?

“Sir, please don’t jostle the merchandise.”

The staff member graciously allowed Wyatt a few moments to collect his breath, having managed to scare him half to death.  “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you like that,” he said, with what Wyatt assumed was a cheerful smirk.  “We don’t usually tip our hand until after the tenth visit or so.  But Derrick here went into trance a bit earlier than we expected, and we really don’t like moving the merchandise once the reprogramming starts.”

Wyatt’s gaze shifted back and forth between the two muscular men.  “You keep referring to him as merchandise.  Do you normally treat your customers like they’re objects and not people?” he said, crossing his arms in irritation.

“I do when they’re wearing our special headphones,” he said, with a hearty chuckle.  Whatever reaction Wyatt had been expecting from the bare-chested staff member, it certainly wasn’t that.  “It’s not your tenth visit yet, but we might as well give you the full tour,” he said, dropping the bands down on the nearest weight bench.  “Follow me into the back, if you would-- we’ll walk and talk.  Here at Friday’s, we pride ourselves in being the gym for the everyday people.  I’m sure you heard that during the initial orientation.  What you did not hear is that anytime we get a hulking beast like Derrick here-- not just someone who has a jock’s physique, mind you, but someone who is truly a massive asshole-- we take it upon ourselves to... intervene.  My current body, for instance-- Frank used to be a racist ass destined to work whatever manual labor job hadn’t fired him yet.  With me in control, he’s the daytime manager of a successful gym, and we’re working on getting a second location opened.”

“Or how about Mathias over there?  No one misses the old, homophobic version.  But the new one, who came out of the closet and owns the jewelry store downtown?  Now that’s a man who’s contributing to society.  Looks great in cardigans, too”  Frank opened the Employees Only door and gestured Wyatt inside.

Wyatt glanced around the break room, which was half consumed by wires, tubing, and a pair of helmets which presumably assisted with the body swap process.  “So, what happens your old bodies?  I feel like the police would notice pretty quickly if a bunch of missing person all happened to have memberships to the same gym.”

Frank gave him another hearty chuckle.  “I suspect you’re right, yes.  That’s what the headphones are used for-- it makes them pliable for reprogramming.  The old Frank is currently inside of my body, living my life... but he has no memory of his past life, and he has no memory of this gym’s existence.  If you decide to take over someone else’s body, it would be the same for you.  Assuming you want to go through with it,” he added.  “For all we know, you’re perfectly happy with your current life.”

It was Wyatt’s turn to laugh.  “I’m not.  If I’m gonna be stuck in a minimum wage rut, at least I can be stuck in a rut while I have some sick abs.  So... you’re not turning me into Derrick, are you?”

“I am not,” Frank said, shaking his head.  “Derrick’s already been spoken for by someone else.  That said, we will happily put you on the waiting list.  It would be two to six weeks, depending on how susceptible your new body is to our reprogramming.  What do you think about Peter, here?”

One look at the broad-shouldered beauty, and he was already starting to daydream about life in the man’s body.  Wyatt couldn’t help but to match Frank’s sincere smile.  “I think he’s the exact sort of high quality merchandise I would like to own for myself.”

[chiliiscereal]

What I want for ROTTMNT season 3

———-

. The same structure of episodes

I liked when they were 14 minutes long, with 2 parts to each episode. I liked that each episode was different. It was enjoyable! Nickelodeon should keep it that way (except for finales of course)

. April and Donnie

Their whole dynamic (platonic or romantic) is so well written and it makes me laugh every time. I want more moments with them! I want shenanigans, hazmat suits, failed experiments, the works!

. Christmas episode or beach episode

I just want them all to be happy tbh. Low stakes, very sweet episode. Maybe see Donnie’s fear of beachballs. Maybe one of the turtles (probs Raph) was scared of Santa as a kid or maybe he goes through a whole episode trying to figure out what to get everyone. It would be so enjoyable.

And of course the boys would get new swimsuit outfits. And for the Christmas episode they’d spend the whole time in matching Christmas pajamas.

. Why Todd is considered a villain

He was considered “as bad as they come” by the gargoyles, and I have a feeling it wasn’t just a comedic mistake. Todd also has his own forge and survived a KRAANG APOCALYPSE! How?? Surely there’s secretly another side to him.

. How the turtles met April

Seriously, we never learned how they met her. I just want a sweet turtle tot episode where we see how their dynamics are formed and Aprils parents thinking they’re imaginary friends. I want sneaking around, splinter not realizing they’re friends with a human, popsicles, baked treats, and lots of trouble. ALL OF IT!!

. More Señor Hueso

I just love how he interacts with Leo. Maybe we get to meet his son who is supposedly going to be out through “bone college” because of all the pizza they buy. I bet he and Mikey would get along.

. Them fangirling over the fact that Lou Jitsu is their dad

I feel like they accepted it too easily, you know? I want questions, I want to know what happened to Splinters mom, and I want Hamato Clan lore!! I would also like to see how splinter adjusted to raising the boys and coming to terms with being a rat. It had to be hard. Maybe even find out what happened to the rest of the Hamato clan!

. The evil dentist

I just know we were gonna get an episode where he tries to go after Raph’s tooth. It was hinted at near the end of his episode. Raph maybe hides it from his brothers and tries to handle it on his own but they eventually figure it out and help him and he learns he doesn’t have to do it all on his own.

. No Venus and Jenika

I’m sorry but Nickelodeon needs to explore other dynamics and find a way to make their introduction feel natural if they’re actually going to do it. I’m sorry and I know it’s unpopular but I think we’d all hate it if they did it wrong. If they’re introduced it needs to be the right way and after Nickelodeon stops ignoring the existing family.

.MORE CASSANDRA MORE CASSANDRA

I just think she’s cool 😎

Also her and Raph would be good sparring buddies I believe. Also she should get anger management with Dr. Delicate touch

. ALL THE MISSING EPISODES WE WERE DENIED AND BARON DRAXUM AGAIN (being a lunch lady)

^ it speaks for itself :3

I’d also think it would be funny if he made friends with a little kid and he accidentally landed himself a job as a babysitter and he takes it cause he needs more money. He finally let’s go of the yokai vs. humans shenanigans

AND WE NEED THE EPISODE WITH MIKEY BEING RESPONSIBLE FOR THE TURTLE TOTS

. Also I’d love an episode where someone (either jerk blond girl or Dale) accidentally gets a picture of the turtles without realizing and they have to try to get the phone and delete it

. April denying that she wants a prom date and the boys all try to find her one. Then when they don’t find anyone and they can tell April is disappointed they all show up for her in human disguises

. The day April gets accepted to that college and the turtles have to cope with the fact that they now won’t see her every day

. More witches

. An episode on Karai and how Shredder came to be through her side of the story

And last but not least:

An actual season 3!!!

Nickelodeon, wake up and see how amazing this show is!!

(If you guys have any other ideas or things you want to see please let me know because funsies)

[jacenbren]

I am in a brainrot mood so I am subjecting y’all to my shitty random Ninjago headcanons because this show is already pretty gay but not quite gay enough:

Dr. Julien was autistic and wanted a son who would understand and be like him so he programmed Zane to be autistic too

After being in close proximity to so many explosions (because of his constant lighting shit on fire) Kai has pretty bad hearing loss

Nya made him special hearing aids because of this but Kai and most of the team are fluent in sign language

Jay has ADHD. I need not elaborate

Mans has so many stim toys its insane and he occasionally makes his own out of shit he has lying around

Speaking of Jay he has a lot of Lichtenberg scarring on his back and arms from using his powers

Kai also has a lot of scars from his powers but especially on his forearms and hands

His fight with the Boreal at the end of season 13 left him with some nasty nerve damage from frostbite when he blocked that ice blast so now Kai wears wrist braces sometimes

Cole has like half a dozen facial piercings most of which he has done himself in his bathroom with questionably safe equipment

He and Nya give each other new piercings/stick and poke tattoos sometimes

Nya gave Cole his snake bite piercings

Skylor and Kai tried to date after season 4 but it didnt really work out but they stayed friends and kinda forgot to tell everyone they broke up (at this point they’ve made a game out of how long they can make people think they’re still together)

Its been like 5 years and half the team hasn’t figured out that Kai and Zane started dating awhile ago

Kai sometimes drags Skylor to the nail salon and they get mani-pedis together while gossiping

Zane and Pixal have sort of a sibling dynamic/twin flame relationship

Pixal is dog autistic and Zane is cat autistic (don’t ask me to explain because I cant and if you get it You Get It)

Jay is the communal iPhone charger

Lloyd bleached his hair during his rebellious phase when he was still at Darkley’s but he got way too committed to the bit and Jay still isn’t convinced that Lloyd is actually a brunette

Morro hung around after DotD and he’s become kinda the equivalent of a mildly annoying poltergeist

Like he could leave and pass on if he wanted to but the Ninja kinda grew on him and he refuses to admit it so now he’s their resident insufferable asshole ghost

Jay collects beanie babies

Kai has a 1000000000-step hair/skincare routine and his products takes up like half the space in the bathroom

Cole doesn’t know how to ride a bicycle and at this point he’s too afraid to ask

Nya had a superwholock phase years ago and whenever Kai brings it up to fuck with her she punches him

Pixal liked to scare the living shit out of Kai and Zane when she was part of the Bounty’s computer by blasting All Star by Smash Mouth over the intercom whenever the security cameras caught them making out

Kai, Nya, and Morro all speak fluent Spanish

Skylor still has fangs from when she got turned into an Anacondrai and claims that she’s venomous (she actually isn’t but everyone’s too afraid to find out)

Ronin dabbled briefly in being a furry

Morro doesn’t actively seek out reality TV but whenever it happens to be on (like in the dentist waiting room or something) he gets way too invested

Lloyd is secretly a sucker for those trashy romance novels you can buy at the airport for like 5 bucks

Kai and Cole smoke weed together A Lot

Jay thinks that both of the Smith siblings are very attractive but he’s too embarrassed to say anything about it to Kai

Cole was a warrior cats kid

Nya has the highest alcohol tolerance on the entire team and frequently drinks people under the table

Kai, Nya: Public school

Jay, Zane, Pixal: Homeschooled

Cole, Lloyd: Private school

Lloyd was that kid in elementary school who used to hiss at and bite people (he still does as a grown ass man)

Jay is that friend who claims that they’re not gonna drink but has to get dragged home from the bar later

Zane wears exclusively Hawaiian shirts in the summer

Cole has this thing where his powers make mineral deposits build up in his pores and he gets acne with little bits of crystal stuck in his pimples

Kai is a functioning alcoholic

[goldenslumbersketchbook]

So here is my Headcanon for a Miraculous AU, Apologies for the wait, I thought I was going somewhere with this but I lost interest rather quickly, sorry.

Jack and Katherine both go to the same school and are in the same class. But to Katherine, Jack is practically invisible as he is too shy to say anything to her. On top of that Katherine doesn’t really want to make any close friends, she says she is only here as a transfer student for one school year.

When not in school Katherine helps North with his toy shop. She lives there as he is a family friend. They sell and invent new toys for the people of Paris. Before North moved to Paris from Russia he was a treasure hunter and found the miracle box and book of miraculous. The box was missing the peacock, the cat, and the butterfly. One day when he was working in his office an akuma attacked the shop. Katherine managed to defeat the akuma all on her own. North decided to share the secrets with her and even gave her the ladybug miraculous for protection. When North showed her the book Katherine was able to decipher some of the spells and secrets.

Katherine would often go on patrols. North would stay home and guard the other miracle box and book. One night while on patrol a cute boy appeared wielding the cat miraculous. She develops a crush but Cat Noir isn’t interested as he likes a girl in his civilian form. The two protect Paris. Occasionally when things become too hectic North will come in and help the two by using the turtle miraculous.

Jack spends his time watching his sister. The two lost there parents at a young age and travel from town to town so they don’t end up separated in foster care. A lovely woman named Emily Jane let’s the two crash at her house as long as they promise to go to school, and help tend to her garden. All seems to be going well until Mary Overland had a breakdown after killing some of the plants in Emily’s garden. She feared Emily would send her and her brother away and ended up getting akumatized. Jack tried to stop his sister when suddenly a flash of light appeared and a strange rabbit man tossed him a ring. He said to Jack “ Kid you best stop her before the timeline gets messy. Use this!” Jack transformed into Chat Noir and stopped his sister…

Bunny is bunnix, no one knows his story but he will pop in from time to time to stop things from getting too messy. Jack was supposed to get the cat miraculous but not for a few more years. Only issue is that Katherine is the only ladybug to find out who hawk moth is. So bunny took a risk and gave Jack the ring in the only year the two would both be in Paris at the same time. He occasionally pops in to stop the world from ending as Jack and Katherine need the extra help. He’s hoping Katherine and Jack will uncover who hawkmoth is soon as it is predicted that the world ends in one year if she doesn’t.

Hawkmoth is none other than Pitch Black. A local psychologist studying nightmares and how the brain processes fears. He uses this knowledge to akumatize people. He is desperate in finding the miraculous to bring his wife back from the dead. He goes into a self isolated depression and soon his daughter Emily Jane moves back in. She brings Jack and Mary overland with her to stay with him to bring some life into his life. Pitch will later confess to Emily about how her mother and how she can be brought back to life with the miraculous. He also tells her that the faster they get the miraculous the faster he’ll stop akumatizing people. Emily reluctantly joins him as the peacock miraculous holder. She figures she can also sway him away from akumatizing children, or causing too much damage to paris.

Sandman gets akumatized often into the sandman. He’s often tired and gets grumpy with lack of naps.

Tooth is also akumatized into the tooth fairy after dealing with disrespectful patients as a dentist.

That’s all I got 💜

thanks again to: @faemorningstar @i-am-the-hero-alfred-jones @icouldntthinkofabetternamesook @spookiestfrost @ave-aria for commenting!

[divinefireangel]

They Just Don't Know You

Soft Yandere! Seo Moon-Jo x F! Reader

Disclaimer: This is just a work of fiction. If this piece of fan fiction is offensive to any celebrity, fandom or culture please let me know so I can take it down. Also note that this is my version of a character or celeb, which will vary from person to person.

Author's Note: A 2nd longer fic for our lovely cannibalistic psychopath. I hate that I'm attracted to him. Someone please be my therapist. Or psychiatrist. Honestly doesn't matter. My brain is fucked anyway.

Copyright: Please note that this is my work and if you want to publish this on any other platform, take my permission before doing so. Taking an author's work and posting it somewhere else without any intimation is just disrespectful. I readily welcome suggestions and criticisms. That being said, Happy reading! 🤍

Warnings: 16+ and written for female reader, but all can read. (nothing specified with respect to appearance, etc of reader). Except that I've mentioned reader is short, cuz LDW is tall 🥰. There is a brief mention of sex, but no actual smut. Reader kinda highkey hates on her parents and younger sister. Read it to know. Age gap between reader and Moon-Jo. Slight obsessive thoughts. Manipulative words. I tried to put plot twist in the end, probably you won't notice it 💀. Please please tell me if I need to add more warnings. Do not read if you start to feel uncomfortable. I apologize in advance 🥺

❗❗PLEASE READ WARNINGS ❗❗

Pre-Requisite / Summary: Just a fic based on the song They Just Don't Know You by Little Mix. After watching Strangers from hell I related this song to him for some reason. Reader and Moon-Jo are in an established relationship. And reader's loved ones don't approve.

2.3k ish words My longest fic till date 🥳

" You know that he's too old for you. You can settle for younger, much younger guys for your age sweetheart. If you can't find anyone eligible enough, we will find one for you. And you don't even know if he has intentions of marrying you. What if all he wants is just a fling or some time pass relationship. Hmm? What are you going to do then? "

Sipping her tea silently, Y/N sat next to her dad on the porch swing, listening to all the criticisms he had about Moon-Jo. All his words did was boil her blood. But what could she do when they don't walk in her shoes? They don't know how safe and content she feels when he kisses her like she's the only girl for him in the entire universe. And no point in explaining that to her father anyway. She's tried. And failed. Multiple times.

"Are you done with your tea?" She asks her dad, in desperate attempt to try and get away from him and his words because she knows, and even he knows that it's going to end up in a fight if they continue to speak on the same topic.

Humming yes, he hands her his tea cup which she takes to the kitchen so she can help her mom with dinner. Placing them in the sink upon entering the kitchen, Y/N drags her palms down her face in frustration.

" I could hear what he said you know. Your dad. He's not wrong. Seo Moon-Jo seems like he'll break your heart in three. And we're only looking out for you Y/N. You don't have to go through heartbreak when you can very well avoid it." Her mom finished slowly.

" Why. Why is it so difficult for you to accept the fact that I'm actually in a happy relationship for once in my life. So what if he's much older than I am? He's a dentist. A doctor. A very good profession and he's known and well respected in his neighbourhood too. " Y/N said loud enough for her dad also to hear.

Huffing in annoyance she left the kitchen to go upstairs to her room. Or rather the room she shares with her sister. Of course the door is wide open. The younger rascal is always here for the drama.

Ever since Y/N came out to her family about her relationship with Moon-Jo, her sister has become the favourite child, for obvious reasons. And now eavesdropping with the door wide open? That's a new low. But what else can Y/N expect from such a low life who is literally thriving off her own sister's pain and suffering.

When entering the room, Y/N realizes how big a mistake it was to visit her family. And she did not need such snark from a younger, less experienced child.

"Are you that blinded by " Love " that you don't even see how weird his hair is? A man who isn't an idol or actor doesn't need such long hair. He's clearly a fuckboy. Or man whore. Whichever is right. " She said with disgust.

'She's just jealous. She's just a jealous bitch. They all are.' Y/N thinks to herself.

" At least one of us gets laid regularly. And just so you know, it's absolutely heavenly when he makes me cum over and over on his fingers and his dick-" Y/N said as her tone slowly got lower and darker and her emotion angrier.

Screaming and covering her ears, the younger girl ran downstairs to her mother, no doubt to tattle on her older sister. Rolling her eyes, Y/N started packing her things, all of them, in a bag she took down from the top shelf of the wardrobe.

It's really difficult to leave one's family, but it is clearly getting more and more tiresome to love them nowadays. If it's so wrong to date him, why does Y/N herself not see it? She's a logical and smart young lady. Does her family hate that man so much that they don't even want her to be happy? No matter who she's with. And is it so bad to date a man who's older? Richer? And cares more about her than all of her family members combined?

Wiping the fallen tear stains from her cheek, she just thinks to herself ' They just don't know him. They just don't know him like I do. '

Sending a text to her lover, saying that she misses him and that she's coming back home sooner than planned, Y/N carries her bag through the front door, her parents and sister ignoring her as she leaves and walks out that door one final time.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Once reaching their shared apartment, Y/N collapsed into her lover's arms the moment he opens the door, crying her eyes out. Seeing his lover in turmoil, shedding a tear or two of his own, Moon-Jo carries her to the living room couch to cradle her like a child who needs attention.

" They- They said -"

" Shh my darling. I know. " Moon-Jo said, shushing his girlfriend and giving her a shoulder to cry on. Once she's calmed a little, her sobs turning to sniffs, she lifts her head to meet his gaze.

Seeing her sad, tear stained eyes always upset him. More than anything in the world. Running his long slender fingers across her cheeks and jaw, he removes her hair from her ponytail with his free hand and rests it on her thigh.

" Tell me. Please tell me that you won't break my heart like them. That you won't try to tear my world apart like them. " Y/N looked desperately at him, wanting so badly to know that he's not just using her.

Those words, that slipped out her mouth, shocked Moon-Jo, to say the least. What did he do wrong? What did her family fill her head with?

Tilting his head to a little, he looks into her red eyes, trying to read her mind for a moment, all the while she just looked at him with the same desperate expression.

"Please tell me that you will be there when I need you the most. " Y/N whispered so softly, she herself barely heard it. But the end of the sentence, she started crying all over again.

Taking her head to his neck, he stroked her hair and her sides, trying to calm her down.

" Darling. I promise with my everything, that I will never leave you, I will never ever let you go. That I will do anything, anything necessary to prove my love to you. "

"No, oh dear no. That's not, you don't have- have to do anything at all to make me believe you love me. I'm sorry I asked such a stupid question. " She sobbed out.

Shushing her softly again, he rocks their bodies back and forth, till she's calmed and fallen asleep there, in his arms. Knowing that his arms are her only safe place for her from now on, he takes her delicate figure to the bedroom.

Placing her on her side of the bed, he lays down on his. Staring at her stunning face, he feather touches her face with his fingertips, memorizing every curve, every little detail on her, like a sculptor admiring his work and giving it the finishing touches.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

" So, I did a little digging on your sugar daddy. "

" Why?! And he's not my sugar daddy. " Y/N said in disbelief. No. Not her dear best friend too.

" I know you said not to and I'm sorry. But I am worried about you. He made you leave your family Y/N. " They stated with worry and sympathy.

" No. He didn't make me leave them. I left them by choice. They don't see him like I do. And clearly, they hate that I'm happy with him. " Y/N finished as they sat down at the lunch table.

" Y/N..... "

" What? Even you don't want me to be happy? " She questioned her friend in disbelief. Laughing sarcastically Y/N shook her head.

" I've heard rumours! Okay? He was in the orphanage that had that severe fire explosion. And most of the culprits from that incident are MIA. What if he's one of the people who caused it?! " They said in a whisper, worried that the neighbouring people can hear their conversation.

" Do you really think that? All of that is just a rumour. And he's told me about it. He's told me everything. Unlike my parents who so desperately tried to tie me down to an arranged marriage. "

" He's not good for you. I know you deserve better. Okay he may make happy and all but what if he leaves? What if he just uses you and drops you like you were nothing? We're just trying to make sure you don't get hurt Y/N. Physically and emotionally. " They finished.

" This, all what you said, is cheap talk. But it'll eventually wear down because when we get married and have kids and all that in the future, you're all going to look like fools. And I will proudly say ' I told you so '. "

" If that's the case then I am the happiest person for you. Hopefully I won't have to be the one to say ' I told you so'. "

" Wow. I, just- hah. Wow. Just wow. " She paused.

" You know, I really hoped you would be more supportive or at least tolerant enough to have patience and support me with my decision for my love. " Y/N said loud enough for eavesdroppers to hear audibly.

Of all the people she would have to drop, never even in her nightmares had she fathomed that her best friend would be one.

Getting up from the table, she picks up her bag and leaves without another word, and goes to the only place that has love for her and that accepts her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Reaching home, Y/N notices the place empty. Maybe he's at the clinic?

Shrugging off her bag and jacket she sits on the couch for a moment, before her restlessness takes over and she begins pacing in the living room.

Why are people being like this? Do they hate her so much? They barely know him. Why are they treating and accusing him to be such a criminal! He's not. He takes care of Y/N so much. He loves her so much. He provides for her. He's affectionate with her, more than he's told he thought capable. He's become her ride or die. And she, his.

They don't know him like I do. They will never love me like he does.

They don't know about the love they have. The just see what they want to see. Bloody society dictating whom to love and whom to not. Is it so hard to see the love they have for each other? Can't they just let it be. They don't know the turmoil she's gone through recently; they don't know how well he's taken care of her, kept her happy and same enough to not let her intrusive thoughts get the best of her.

Her thoughts interrupted by the door clicking open. Smiling, Moon-Jo enters with a box, surely containing sweets from her favourite bakery. How can you not love someone so considerate, who does things for you without even having to ask.

Seeing the sad look upon his lover's face, Moon-Jo's smile fades into a frown.

" What's wrong my dear? "

Smiling sadly Y/N just shakes her head, conveying that she doesn't want to talk about it.

Placing the box of sweets on the coffee table, the two hug each other, feeling of comfort taking over them both. She can just stay here, forever, in his arms till the world ends.

" Babe. What's wrong? You can tell me anything. Anything at all. I'll take care of the problem. " Delicately Moon-Jo cradles Y/N's head in his palms, making her face up to him, their height difference evident.

Sighing, she moves to sit on the couch, motioning him to do the same. " It's just people. And what they say. My family was one thing, but my best friend, the person I chose as my family " Pausing Y/N breathers the tears back in, " They were doubtful of you today. How can I live knowing that no one will approve of us? " Y/N questioned looking at him.

" Does their opinion really matter that much? So much so that you are skeptical of my affection to you? " Coldly, he moved back from his seat on the couch.

" No! No. Gosh that is not what I mean. Not at all. I love you and I know that you love me. So much. So much so I would die for you. But there are other people whom I care about. Who's opinions matter to me. And I don't want to let them go. As happy as I am with you, I need them too. They give me joy in a different way, that is important. "

" Do I not make you happy? Are you not content with the love I give you? Is it not enough? " He asks carefully.

" That's not what I meant! You love me more than anyone I've known. "

"Then what's the problem? You don't need those people who don't love you. You have me. You will have me forever and ever. I will never leave you. And you will never leave me either. We'll be with each other till the end of the world darling. "

Nodding with a small smile you looked down at your feet.

Unhappy with your action, Moon-Jo pulls your face up by your chin to look at him with such force, it scared you a little, making your heart skip a beat in fear.

" Do you not love me, babe? " He asked tilting his head to a side, his expression mildly offended.

" I do! I love you. So much. " You finished with a soft tone, cupping his face with your hands.

Grinning like a Cheshire Cat, Moon-Jo leaned down to capture your lips with his. Reacting immediately, you kissed him with as much energy and sincerity you could muster, as you head filled with thoughts of doubt.

Had your parents been right? Had for friend been right? Had they all been right all along and you too blind to see?

No. It can't be. He loves you. He's said that so many times. And you love him.

You love him.

You.

Love.

Him.

...

Do you love him, or have you been illusioned into loving him?

[miekasa]

any spare levi headcanons tonight????? 😁😁😁😁

Sure, why not, he is the love of my life after all. These are pretty random, and fit in some sort of generalized modern boyfriend au. Hopelessly domestic, as that is the nature of nearly everything I write for Levi, anyway. Also still terribly obsessed with the idea of him with a motorcycle, so there’s that.

He owns at least six black blazers. They’re nearly identical; slight differences in texture and cut, one with lapels, one that’s boldly all leather that you swear you’ve never seen him wear. They’re kind of his go-to staple, other than a sweater.

That being said, he doesn’t exclusively wear all black. His closet leans towards more neutrals, sure, but he’s not allergic to color. You might not catch him wearing neon orange on the average day, but he’s not averse to a nice shade of green, any shade of purple that suits his mood, even a softer pink.

He has towels and rags he sets aside especially for you when he comes over. He always washes them and put them back in place when you leave so that they’re ready to go for next time.

Claims to not have any attachment to the shows/dramas you watch, but he’s totally backseat watching. Halfway into every single series, he starts sitting down when you turn it on, and scoffs at dumb decisions the characters make.

He splurged on one of those frame TVs that look like a painting when they’re idle. It was a good investment in his opinion.

He doesn’t hate Starbucks drinks—there’s worse things out there in terms of quality of tea. What he despises about the establishment is the way they call out names for you to pick up your order. He’s learned that mobile order ahead is the way to go.

Has slippers for around the house, so consequently, you have slippers for walking around his house. He keeps both pairs (and a few extra for friends and guests) tucked neatly beside the door for easy access; yours always go next to his.

Does not understand the purpose of a robe. Buy him one tho and he will suddenly find an excuse to wear it: making breakfast, lounging around watching TV, doing some light cleaning and dusting. It’s comfy, alright, he can admit that much.

The little puppy you got him that he swore he was not going to warm up to now gets the royal treatment. The best doggie goods and treats, top rated shampoos, cutest drying towels, even a miniature couch he constructed just for the pup. They’re best friends, there’s no breaking that bond now.

Speaking of the puppy, affectionately named Captain, Levi can be found walking him every day shortly after work. They have a few different routes, but they always pass by the local vendors/market, who enthusiastically anticipate their appearance every day. Some of the older ladies running stands have even taken to bringing a few treats with them for Captain—after bundling up some goods for Levi, too, of course.

Captain also has a special doggy backpack Levi uses for when he’s on his motorcycle. If you follow anybody on TikTok in his area, you’re bound to see at least one video of the pup while Levi’s out riding. He’s become viral on social media without even knowing it.

(When you show him a video someone posted of him and Captain with well over 100k likes, and a million views, he only rolled his eyes. But remembers that particularly day; remembers the folks had a kid who politely asked to pet the dog, so he let him. He also maybe asks you to send the link to him).

On the subject of the motorcycle, there was a good few weeks he wouldn’t let you on it. Always found an excuse, a smart reply that was punctuated with gentle push on your forehead and calling you too clumsy for it. Later, you found out it’s because he’d ordered you a helmet; didn’t want to risk you riding without one.

He always keeps it in the storage compartment should he make a stop to pick you up while he’s riding; and he usually wears at least two layers to have a spare to wrap you in before you get on.

When he cooks, he always makes sure there’s enough for leftovers and/or to give you some later. He also bakes frequently, and at least once a week, he stops by with some kind of treat for you—“Trying out a new recipe, let me know if you think it’s missing anything.”

On the subject of food, he won’t police what you eat to annoying extent; he knows that not everybody has the time or will to make pasta from scratch like he does. But, he will smack your wrist if you consider ordering fast food when you’re over at this place. Give him 30 minutes and a single pan, he’ll make something much better than whatever you can find on Uber Eats.

Really, though, he doesn’t mean to obnoxious about the homemade food thing, it’s more habit for him. Growing up, he had to learn to be resourceful, so buying fast-food isn’t ever at the forefront of his mind. Cooking for you also turns out to be something somewhat intimate that he enjoys, so just let him.

Once bought an Apple Watch because he liked the look of them, it wasn’t insanely expensive like other high end watches, and it could connect to his other devices, so why not? A week later he returned it, the ping of his notifications were in one too many places for his liking.

You tried to convince him to keep it—“At least for when you’re jogging! It can track your activity and calories!”—but he clicks his teeth. He’ll survive without keeping track of them.

He learned the hard way that jogging with Captain is no good. His legs are too tiny and Levi ended up carrying the puppy the entire time. Captain is more of a walk dog… or ride on the back of his bike dog.

If you changed anything in his phone settings—like the ringtone for you contact, or the sound his keyboard makes—he wouldn’t go back in and try to figure out how to reset it. Unless it was something obnoxious, like adding an autocorrect shortcut to say something lewd.

He doesn’t really listen to music when he’s just walking. When he’s on a run, that’s fine, but he somewhat prefers to just… hear the environment around him when he’s on a stroll or a break from work. The only reason he’d have headphones on in public is to take a phone call, but even then, he’d prefer to wait until he’s somewhere more private.

He likes having you over at his apartment and has contemplated asking you to move in. He doesn’t want to rush anything, though, so he’s content with your sleepovers for now. (Though he really cannot fathom that you call them “sleepovers” like you’re 14. Please).

He speaks to his mother at least once a week, and she always asks about you. Levi tells her that you’re fine, gives her small updates about you, but Kuchel really just wants to know when the wedding is. He pretends to be busy whenever she starts asking and conveniently ends the call.

Occasionally, he’ll stop by and take you out for lunch. Depends on how much time he has during the day for himself, but he always enjoys sharing a meal with you.

Whenever you’re out with your friends drinking, Levi will pick you up. Even if you already told him that you’d Uber home; as soon as you text him that you’re going to leave soon, he’s already on his way.

He makes pretty good cocktails himself. Teases you for running his alcohol supply dry when the truth is he has more of your favorites in his cabinet than his own. He secretly likes the way you flirt with him when you’re tipsy.

You don’t always cuddle on top of each other when you sleep together. You can just lay by each other and that’s enough; but sometimes, you catch Levi turning towards you in his sleep, reaching for your hand. His body seems to search for yours subconsciously, and you swear there’s a hint of a smile on his sleeping face when you put your hand within reach.

Do not try to pay for dinner when you’re out with him. He’ll pull the “I’m going to use the restroom” move and pay the bill behind your back if he needs to. Open your own doors, maybe; pull out your own chairs, sure if you want; but not this.

He flosses very diligently every night. Mostly because he fucking hates the dentist, so if he takes the extra steps and is extra careful with his teeth, he doesn’t have to go as often, right?—Wrong, it’s the one time the roles are reversed, and you and Hange have to wrestle him into the doctor’s office.

On the flip side, if there are any doctors you routinely avoid and/or forget to schedule check ups for, fear not, because Levi will do it for you. He’ll drive you there, too—the only caveat being, that he usually doesn’t tell you where you’re going until you’re almost there. You think he’s doing the mysterious man surprise date thing and then boom, he’s pulling up to the ophthalmologist. Good luck.

He’s purchased a physical, paper copy of the news on every one of your anniversaries, birthdays, and other special occasions. He keeps them all neatly tucked away in a drawer. Sometimes, he looks back on them—sees what was happening in the world around you on that day. Maybe someday he’ll cut them up and bind them together in a book for you.

He doesn’t like having headphones in when you’re home with him, and preferred if you didn’t either—unless it was for work or school. He welcomes you to use his speakers and play your music aloud; he likes listening to what you listen to. If you look closely, you can catch him humming along or tapping his foot when he really likes a song.

Saves pictures you send him in an album in his camera roll. Occasionally can be found scrolling through them—particularly if you’ve been away on a trip, or he hasn’t gotten the chance to see you because of conflicting schedules.

He takes relatively short showers and doesn’t have a strong preference for the water temperature, so he lets you shower first. Unless you want him to join you, of course.

It’s not hard to tell when Levi wants you. He becomes noticeably more touchy, even if that margin isn’t too wide by anyone else’s standards; and he rarely tries to hide it. It only happens in the privacy of your apartments; but he’ll come on to you—leaning a bit further into conversations, a hand on your knee, a kind of cloudy look in his eyes.

Sometimes he forgoes the attempts at being subtle, just kisses you out the blue, carefully backs you up against the wall, puts his hands on your hips. He can be awfully direct when given the opportunity.

[imkylotrash]

Found A Lover

Pairing: Saul Silva x reader

Request: They are soulmates but Saul is stubborn (all the angst) and refuses to accept the bond until reader gets hurt and we get an epic love confession. @kingunder221b And She's close to graduation. Her friend, also a fairy, is really into potions, he's brilliant at that. He hides his stuff in her room and something goes wrong with his last potion. The reader is hurt and it's like in a fairy tale, she falls asleep. The difference is, she's trapped in one big nightmare and her heart will give up if they don't find a solution. They try everything, even go to Dowling, but nothing helps. The only option left is true love kiss, so they go to Silva. Anonymous

A/N Italics are the nightmares and I tried going for a little bit of a horror theme though nothing too bad. They can be skipped if that’s not your thing. I’m not sure if any of this falls under trigger warnings but please let me know if you want something added 💛

Tagging: @grey-girl @intoanothermind @anreeixcobra @kingunder221b @lflores2008 @alexiapayne12 @quuenofblacks @quarterback-5 @estelmei @bitchwhytho @music-of-melody @artsyle​ @baueoud @glowingatdawn @shadowhuntyi

There’s no denying it though Saul tries very hard to. His soulmate is not a student at the school. He refuses to believe his own eyes as you hold out your arm with the exact same scar as his. Same shape, same placement, same everything. 

“This is a mistake,” he says making it seem as though it’s somehow your fault that the universe decided that the two of you would be right for each other. 

“With that reaction I’m not exactly too fond either,” you sneer upset that he so willingly disregards you. All your life, you’d listened to people finding their soulmate and falling head over heels in love within seconds. Like they’ve been walking around blind and now they can finally see. That’s what you expected when you found your soulmate - not a grumpy old man desperate to get as far away from you as possible. 

“We should keep this information to ourselves for now,” he says and you couldn’t agree more. Why would you want to tell everyone that your soulmate refuses to acknowledge your bond? What Saul doesn’t tell you is just how terrified he is finally having found his soulmate. He’d made peace with the fact that he’d spend life alone. He’s terrified that you’re so young compared to him and that he won’t be able to give you everything that you want. He’s already raised Sky and he’s not eager to think about doing that again. The best action for him is staying away and allowing you to fall in love with someone who can be what you need. It’s just not how this soulmate thing works.

Upset from his rejection, you run straight to Logan’s room hoping he’ll be back soon so you can cry on his shoulder. You’re not sure if you’ll be able to tell him what happened but you know he won’t push you if you don’t want to talk. He doesn’t get there in time though. You have no way of knowing that the book you grab to inspect as you wait is actually a secret storage box. The weight surprises you and it slams onto the floor. Something breaks inside the book which confuses you even more. When does books contain glass. When you open the lid, a weird dust spreads making you cough violently. Your eyes water as you struggle to breathe. Within seconds, you’re lying on the floor looking as if you’re blissfully asleep. 

“Y/N!” Logan runs over to shake you awake but he knows it’s no good when he sees the smashed bottle. Without wasting another minute, he runs right out the door to find Mr. Harvey leaving you to your own worst nightmare. 

“Hello,” you call out walking down the empty hallway. It feels like you’re underground but you can’t be sure without finding a window so you keep walking. The first thing you notice when you enter the new room is the blood soaking your slippers. The white bunny slippers are now red and you feel like you might be sick. 

“Hello,” you call out once more hoping someone will hear you. 

“Hello,” someone says in a mocking tone. You spin around to find yourself standing there? Is it a mirror of some kind? 

“I’m not a mirror, you idiot. I’m you,” it says carelessly throwing a knife into the air and catching it again, “but without all the weaknesses.” You want to scream but suddenly, your mouth is sewn shut. When you reach up to touch it, you feel the thread closing your lips together. 

“I figured that was the easiest way to keep you from yelling. God, do you ever shut up?” The thing takes a few stops closer to you still clutching the knife in their hand. 

“Sorry. That was a very dentist move of me, wasn’t it? Asking you a question knowing full-well that you can’t answer.” You must’ve sprouted roots because there’s no way you’d still be standing there if you were able to move. Carefully, the copycat lifts the knife to your mouth letting the tip of the blade run across the thick thread. 

“Poor thing, huh? Not even your soulmate wants you. It’s sort of like mommy and daddy all over.” 

Your body is being transferred to Mr. Harvey’s office as well as the powder you inhaled. Logan knows exactly what potion it is but there’s no cure in the records. No cure to wake you up and it’s all his fault for not storing the potions correctly. He knew he should’ve kept them under lock and key but half the stuff in his room, he wasn’t even supposed to have. 

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Harvey. I never thought anyone would get hurt.” He looks down at his best friend lying on the table and he swears he’ll never be so careless with potions ever again. 

“It’ll do you no good to dwell on that now. We need all hands on deck to figure out how to wake her up again.” What he doesn’t mention is the fact that he’s not sure how much time your heart has left before it stops entirely. The stress it’s being put under is nothing like Mr. Harvey has ever seen before. 

“Fight, Y/N,” Logan whispers. 

You want to scream at yourself for bringing up mom and dad but you can’t. The knife comes to rest on your throat so that every time, you take a breath you feel the cold blade on your skin. 

“Should I be quick or slow? What do you prefer?” Once again, you try to scream but to no avail. The first cut takes you by surprise. When the copy of you brings the knife down to your chest, you get worried. Could you really kill yourself like this? 

“Blink once for quick, twice for slow.” You blink once waiting for it to be over. You don’t know why you’ve given up so easily or why you not even for a second think to use your magic but you just don’t have a fight in you. 

“Perfect.” The blade pierces your skin until it reaches your heart. You feel the heart beating faster in an attempt to persevere but it is futile. 

“I’ve tried everything, Farah. Every solution the greenhouse has to offer and nothing works.” Three days pass with Harvey working hard to reverse the potion’s effects but nothing helps. You stay asleep and your heart continues to beat itself to death. 

“Do we know who their soulmate is? We should probably inform them,” Ms. Dowling says bringing out a vague memory in Logan’s mind. He runs straight to the library hoping his theory is right. 

“Is everything okay?” He looks up to find Mr. Silva standing there.

“Y/N is hurt. I’m trying to find a cure,” Logan says grabbing the book and running straight back to Mr. Harvey but this time Mr. Silva is right behind him. 

“True love’s kiss!” Logan exclaims finding the fairy tale in the book from Earth. He shows it to Mr. Harvey and Ms. Dowling who scans over the fairy tale of Sleeping Beauty. 

“Then we must find her soulmate,” Mr. Harvey says and while Logan knows it’s true, he also knows you haven’t found your soulmate yet. He’s about to open his mouth when Saul beats him to it. 

“I’m their soulmate. We just found out a couple of days ago.” He was so scared when he found out he was your soulmate but watching you lie on that table he knows he can’t let anything happen to you. It’s the reason he leans in and places a gentle kiss on your lips. The effect is almost instantly. You open your eyes very confused and terrified out of your mind. Is this another nightmare? 

“It’s okay. You’re safe,” Saul whispers holding your hand tightly. You don’t need words as you look into each other’s eyes. The love is evident even if Saul tried to run from it. Seeing you in pain like this had awoken something inside of him and he swore from that day on that he’d always protect you.

[fightmewiatch]

You would think I walked under a ladder, or broke a mirror, or. Or something, I don’t know. 

Idk how many people saw my last post (last week...or the week before, I genuinely have a terrible hold on time), where my car decided to give me the finger and not start, and I had to get it fixed for over a grand. 

Well. More fun.

Wednesday I woke up in tremendous pain, from one of my teeth. Tremendous. It would fluctuate, I’d have a few okay minutes, but then it would feel like someone was punching me hard in the side of the head - my sinus, my ear, my eye, my entire skull, everything on the right side of my head was in pain. I tried to work, couldn’t, clocked out early & went to the dentist in town. “Oh you need a root canal.”

I don’t know if you remember the dental fiasco in the last year and a half, but let’s see if I can shorten it for you a bit (this all takes place between May 2021 and March 2022): Cracked tooth (named #3 apparently) -> dental tech broke the tooth during cleaning -> Dentist #1 did a filling on both tooth #2 and tooth #3 and said if it didn’t take, she’d do a root canal -> Dentist #1 informs us she DOESN’T DO ROOT CANALS and that’s what I now needed (tbh, that’s a whole shit show of its own) & she would only send my xrays to the endodontist she referred me to (which wasn’t covered by my insurance - there is exactly 1 endodontist in a 2 hour radius on my insurance) so I had to fight her to print them -> went to Dentist #2 for an exam, scheduled me to see their in-office endo (the guy on my insurance) -> root canal done -> crown was made, but first appointment for it to be put in was pushed back (WHILE I WAS DRIVING THERE) bc they didn’t get it back like they planned -> crown didn’t fit, had to be redone -> crown was put on, but after a week I was still in pain -> went back, had an infection, root canal FAILED had to have it done again -> had to have the crown redone as well -> repeat -> more pain, still infected -> endodontist drills it out (after insisting there’s nothing on the xray) and cleans out the infection that IS there, and seals up the tooth, no new crown. By the time it was over, he was legitimately dismissing any concerns I had about the pain - I repeatedly told him, I don’t know why, but I’m still in pain, despite the root canal & antibiotics, etc etc, and he dismissed me, didn’t really have much interest in finding out why. 

Back to now. The Dentist here in town (Dentist #3), very nice guy. Looks at the new xray, looks in my mouth, and tells me that my root canal (the fiasco) is actually fine. its the tooth next to it. #2. The other one Dentist #1 filled. They refer me to their endodontist, though assure me I can take their referral to any endo if theirs isn’t covered. Of course their endo isn’t covered - remember how I said there’s only 1 endo in a 2 hour radius that my insurance covers? Same guy who dismissed my pain for the last year. There’s no way in hell I’ll ever go back to someone who doesn’t care that I’m in pain (or someone who flirts with the nurses while his hands are in my mouth, but, also, another day, another story). But there’s also no way I can afford to pay for a root canal out of pocket to see the referred endo, or risk going through a year of visits if the root canal fails again. (And honestly? I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of those repeat visits were because of tooth #2, not the original root canal - but like I said, he - and the other dentist I saw there - dismissed my concerns and didn’t try to figure out why I was still in pain.) 

So Friday I went back in. I said fuck it. It’s the back molar. I don’t have any teeth behind it. It’s in bad shape anyway. Fuck it. Take the tooth out. It’s cheaper, it’s faster. Take it. He tried to talk me into doing the root canal (”the structure is sound”, “do you want me to try the root canal?”), but I’m so tired of dental shit. I thanked him and said no and he pulled the tooth. (I already feel better.)

BUT WAIT.  THERE’S MORE.

I drove to the store today. Grocery store, maybe 15 minutes maximum of a drive from my house. No problems. Went to get medications for my folks. Driving home. Halfway back. Error pops up on my dashboard - something about the battery service system. I have no clue what that is, but the battery light was also on. I slowed down (I was on a back road near a stop sign & an old folks home, I wasn’t going fast to begin with.) And then I noticed it was getting hot in the car (its south Texas), so I checked the AC temp knob, which is as low as it gets, and my dash popped up a message about AC being turned off bc the engine was too hot. And then, I got the last message,  ENGINE OVERHEATED- IDLE ENGINE.

Never, ever saw that message before. Never. I’ve replaced the water pump in this car twice (about 5 years ago, in the span of a year). 

You ever have an absolute emotional breakdown in South Texas sitting in your overheated car on the side of the road trying to focus and figure out what to do? Not fun. 

I called the folks. My stepdad drove over, followed me with his hazards on while I limped the car to the mechanics - it’s usually maybe a 2 minute drive from where I had stopped the car, took us about fifteen to get it back, I had to keep stopping & turning it off so it could cool down. 

Shop doesn’t open til tomorrow. Won’t know what the problem is until after they do. I’m hoping it’s just a thermostat. The coolant tank was full, I opened the engine to look (not that I know much of what I’m looking at tbh). 

I don’t know what I did to have this all hit me in less than a month. It’s fucking bullshit, is what it is. I’m so fucking angry, I needed to vent this out but fucking hell, I have no idea what to do if it’s more serious than the thermostat, because I can’t afford another car, I can’t afford a goddamn thing. 

Okay. Venting. Ranting. Over.