#but 1 is just abnormal but not like ‘smths going ON’

[strangefellows]

okay because i've been rotating it in my head while i have a cold and a fever and why the fuck not babble about this now!

my thoughts on ayin and angela under the cut because i have a LOT of them!

so i want to preface this with a very important disclaimer

NO MATTER WHAT ELSE I SAY HERE, AS A HUGE FAN OF AYIN (as you might notice he's my #1 projmoon blorbo), what Ayin did to Angela was wrong, and cruel, and unjustifiable, and she is 100% within her rights to hate him and resent him and have complicated feelings towards him and do everything she did in Ruina. No matter what I say about my thoughts on why he did it, I don't intend it to be an excuse or justification because it's not. He owes her an apology at the bare minimum and she does NOT owe him forgiveness or anything of the like if she doesn't feel like it. He was a total asshole and she deserved better.

THAT SAID

at the same time i don't think that ayin did what he did out of 100% outright malice and genuine hatred. i think he did what he did because he was extremely fucking traumatized, definitely probably autistic, and has the communication and emotional skills of a wet sock.

do i think he genuinely cared about angela? yes.

for what it's worth he LITERALLY CREATED A LIFE. LITERALLY. FROM SCRATCH. there's no way he didn't care about her on some level even if just as a creation because do you know how much work would have had to go into that? at some point even if he was doing it for selfish carmen related reasons he still had to care about her for her own sake on some level

(vaguely related but the fact that ayin did do this - plus just all of how lobcorp works as a wing - makes me think his background is in compsci or computer engineering or smth of that nature, with ben similarly in those fields / headcanon wise i run with he was originally compsci but after An Incident in which his own dreams were shattered he shifted to abnormal psych)

do i think he did not react well to the consequences of his actions when she finally woke up and he had to process he gave his creation the face of his dead crush + angela was completely trusting and obedient to him and even acted almost in love with him? also yes

is this justified for him? no. is it his own fucking fault for being selfish and stupid? yes.

do i think some of his cruelty towards her was not just out of lashing out via trauma and horror at what he'd done, but pushing her away the more she acted trusting/obedient bc he knew what he was setting her up to do via the script and felt tremendously guilty that he was doing this to someone who trusted him so implicitly? yes.

was, again, it justified? no.

but again, the bottom line is that while what he did was wrong and cruel, i don't think he hates her truly or that he harbored any malice towards her. i think he cared, and felt horribly guilty for what he did to her and continued to do to her, but again, trauma and 'tism and the emotional capabilities of a soggy cardboard box.

he owes her one hell of an apology at the LEAST for all he's done tbh

but another thing: i think that the reason he left the script blank for her after everything was finished was because he short-sightedly thought he was "freeing her" to make her own choices by leaving it blank not thinking for a goddamn second she would misinterpret it given his terrible behavior towards her up til that point. again, not out of malice but out of selfishness and idiocy and not knowing how to communicate At All

i also do think by the end of things after all those loops as X with her as one of the only anchors, he softened a lot towards her as he processed better how they were both trapped in an endless hell of his past self's making, and there's a lot to be said about how their feelings about each other are stupidly complicated due to all his interactions w her as X without his memories of what he'd done, and as he went thru the loops dying/committing suicide/suffering with her as the only witness. i like to think that though she hates him and has every right to and to not forgive him, it's extremely complicated and there's definitely a level of....something, having seen him suffering, but she's flawed and human and wonderful and stubbornly holding onto her hate and resentment and she's valid.

idk how much sense any of this makes but tldr ayin fucked up and treated his daughter like absolute shit and she's entirely in the right to hate/resent him and never forgive him but i don't think he truly hated her, i think he's just a fucked up idiot who made stupid choices out of trauma etc etc etc

tune in next time when i talk about how despite ayin's shitty life choices being his own shitty choices carmen absofuckinglutely gaslit the goddamn hell out of him and that deserves to be talked about! or when i talk about how ayin's shitty actions towards trapping the sephirah in the brainboxes AS sephirah was probably out of a misguided and selfish attempt to "save" them using the seedling of light process because he had regrets and cared about them and loved them and did all of that shit re: them out of coping badly with trauma mental illness and autism! (tho this is ostensibly explicitly canon imho).

holds up ayin. this is a traumatized autistic depressed mess of a man and he did so many stupid shitty things but he's not evil he's just a flawed human and ALL OF THIS is why dantayin theory (u knew it'd come up) because nobody LEAST OF ALL ANGELA truly got closure with this dumbass and they deserve that as much as he deserves a proper ending

[luffyrose]

Barry, Constantine, and the Kid

I was reading "I Just Wanna Talk" by foldingfacets and the way Barry interacts with Danny, and his whole misunderstanding just gave me a very very good fic idea.

Danny was Constantine's kid! But thanks to whatever ex had him, John had no idea who Danny was, nor that his kid had been put up for adoption. (I'm feeling a random one-night stand with some god-adjacent being so that Danny was already very much Other, compared to normal people). His not fully human blood had him survive the Fenton household, seeing as Jazz had radiation exposure since she was little basically so she'd survived thanks to that.

Danny kinda figured he was adopted. Sure his hair was black like Jack's and his blue eyes weren't anything abnormal, but his parents were both very very white. And he was much more tan, definitely Mideastern. Jazz actually confirmed it when he asked one time, but he still loved them all dearly. He tried to love them all, but it was hard when the only one he really remembers raising him is his sister. Until the accident happens and things just go south.

Like, Danny does his whole hero thing, and works things out with his ghosts because most of them were either messing around or didn't realize he was actually a baby ghost because he was so strong or smth, idk, they cooperate with him and just come to bug him and play fight when bored or needing to satisfy their core. All in all, he's King of the Infinite Realms now and he is not having a good time tm-

He's SEEN all the John Constantine things, but never bothered with tracking this guy down because hey! selling his soul to multiple entities to prevent ANYONE from getting it was really smart! Who was he to fault the guy.

It kind of all comes crashing down though when things go horribly ary with his adoptive parents. He overheard them talking, and even though they did love him, he learned that to them he wasn't just their kid. He was still the kid Jazz really wanted for a brother. After literally growing up in their house, he wasn't on the same level as Jazz. Simply because he was adopted, and neither had truly planned to adopt him.

And despite learning this, he tries so hard to still love and few them as his parents, because he's NOT their kid! They're right, but they still raised him no they didn't it was Jazz and he thought that they at least loved him more than that some part of him knew they never had. So when Jazz suggests they tell them, together for his own safety, he agrees for two reasons. 1, he loves and trusts Jazz and she really wanted to believe they were better than just ghost hunting. 2, he could finally know the truth, whether they would not believe him, hate him, or love him.

They don't.

Maddie and Jack both believe he died due to their creation. They don't doubt that for a moment. Jazz is thrilled at first, thinking that meant they would feel sorry, apologize, accept Danny, ANYTHING except harm him. But she was wrong as they tried to shoot him. She tried to stop them, and they told her even if he was Danny, that he was a ghost which meant it wasn't ever really going to be him again. And Jazz was horrified, asking how they could shoot their own son, ghost or not, and as if it was the simplest thing in the world, they say he wasn't their son.

And that was it.

Danny ran.

He hid in the ghost zone, and Jazz tried to come with. She ended up destroying the portal, outing Vlad, and running away with a voice recorder of their parents and the conversation they'd had. Sam and Tucker have to lay low, only messaging Danny to ask if he'd been hurt.

Danny didn't reply.

After a few months, his friends had gotten a reply a few days after, so had Jazz, saying he was fine and Fright Knight was watching over him, which was true but the Knight was more worried than anything, Pandora stopped by. She was kind of like an aunt, so she hated to see him sad. But she'd also realized something.

Halfa, as most VERY old ghosts and Ancients know, are rare to find. Vlad was an odd case, being Halfa-adjacent but not a true Halfa since it took 20 years for his powers to grow to what they were when it was normal for quick power growth like Danny. Not only does one need to die with a bunch of ectoplasm nearby, but they must have a few other requirements. Such as a bond with the supernatural, strong magic, etc. No mortal being without very strong and innate abilities would survive a full Halfa creation. So she'd always been curious as to how Danny survived when even heroes who'd been exposed to death would not near chance of being a Halfa.

Being a demi-god made it a lot easier. Even then, not all demi-gods would survive either, seeing as it would be rare for them to be within range of the ectoplasm needed to balance their god-like blood. Danny was an incredibly special case. Pandora had found out that Danny wasn't just a demi-god, but the human who was his parent was an incredibly strong magic user. So much so, that he'd tricked and tried his way through many many years of his life. Honestly, Pandora was amazed the human was alive.

Telling Danny of his father was not in her plan, though she did tell him of his demi-god blood. She also told him, that it may be safer with heroes.

So with a little time to heal, not really he was still bandaged up but at least he wasn't about to fall apart, Danny got Wulf and Cujo, the former opening a portal with a sad goodbye for the time being. (Really, Wulf would always know where Danny was.) Either way, Danny had planned to find this John Constantine, since seeing as he'd somehow avoided death all while dimension hoping, he was probably a good bet. Or at the very least could help him find a hero to help.

Falling through the portal with Cujo, he hadn't expected a giant room in what he could only guess was a secret base. There was a hero, he really should have looked up heroes, but most of his childhood hadn't really given him access to anything outside of his hometown, which was staring in shock at him.

And Flash meets Danny.

And instantly wants to adopt the kid. Sorry, Bruce! This one is his kid actually! But when he hears the boy's reason for being there, the poor kid looking utterly terrified and apologetic for barging in and trying to explain how Constantine's contact info had led him here, Barry is just crushed. He's keeping the kid entertained, panicking, and trying to contact John.

Wally ends up meeting him while they're waiting, and it instantly taking this kid as his own new brother. If his boyfriend gets a bunch of younger siblings so does he!

Either way, both speedsters are already filing adoption papers, not really as much as Barry wants to because he knows better than to take in an unknown even with how horrifying this child's accidental slips of his home-life was like.

So we have an MIA John, not like that's rare-, an unknown child who they really need to test DNA for but don't want to scare him, speedsters already mentally said kid's parent, and a whole lot of chaos. Danny had no IDEA that Constantine is his bio dad, Clockwork had Pandora hint him this way for a reason though...he got a dad one way or another and in some universes, he had 2. So. No loss situation to the Ancient.

They are not ready for this traumatized ass kid because he doesn't even realize he'd traumatized. Wait till he has a panic attack though, Danny, despite his apparent obliviousness to how fucked up he should be, will finally seem like the hurt kid he is.

And oh boy, wait till someone accidentally jostles a wound during that whole first meeting since Danny's hiding his wounds. Now that's a whole other bag of worms to open, like how'd he get them????

[miseryandroses]

Doric x Male! Reader Drabbles

I know most people headcanon Doric as being queer or lesbian but in my mind she’s bisexual. I dunno it might just be because I’m bisexual too or smth. Anyways enjoy!

P.S. if you haven’t seen DnD honor among thieves do yourself a favor and watch it

#1

Y/N drinking coffee, shirtless, after a steamy “chat” with Doric.

Doric suddenly sneaking behind him and wrapping her arms around his waist.

Y/N: Hi

Doric: Hi (she says muffled as she speaks into his back)

Her hands make their way up his body until they rest on his chest, giving it a little squeeze and touch.

Y/N: Are you seriously fondling my chest right now?

Doric: (Takes her head off of him) not my fault your pecs are bigger than my tits.

Y/N: (Spits out coffee)

#2 healer Y/N x flirty Doric

Doric getting lectured and patched up by Y/N after a fight with some red wizards.

Y/N: I mean what if you were killed?! It’s not like we can find another tablet of reawakening!!

Doric: Maybe there is one (she mutters)

Y/N: Well… maybe? I dunno. I’d have to ask Simon or something, ooh maybe we could go over some old scrolls or-Wait! You’re trying to distract me aren’t you?!

Doric: Oh please (she smirks) if I wanted to distract you (She turns around with a seductive look on her face) I’d have done it already.

Y/N: I-I (Blushing) just be careful next time (he says as he averts his gaze)

Doric: Uh-huh (she says smiling)

#3 Rogue Y/N x Doric

Y/N (a rogue) was sent to infiltrate the emerald clave base camp and get info back to Forge. However he didn’t plan on running into Doric. The two engaged in a fierce albeit short battle that ends with Y/N cornering Doric, who is out of energy to transform or run.

Y/N: tsk tsk. Honestly I expected more from the great leader of the emerald clave rebellion.

Doric: (sniffling and tearing up) Go ahead then, do it. Finish it!

Y/N: Are you… crying?

Doric: N-No! (tears fall down her face)

Y/N: oh my-fuck! Cmon you lost fair and square! Meet your end with dignity!

Doric: I am! (She’s sobbing at this point)

Y/N: …Damn it!! (He lowers his sword) Fine I’ll let you live! It’s not like Forge is paying me enough for this shit anyways (he grumbles)

Doric: (Stands up with a smirk on her face) Thanks! (She quickly transforms into an owl-bear and knocks him into a nearby tree before turning into a hawk and flying off)

Y/N: fuck! (He groans before sitting up) I think I’m in love (he smirks to himself)

#4 cute Y/N x Doric

Y/N and Doric have been off an adventure for the past couple of days and he can’t stop thinking about her horns and what they might feel like. He often found himself staring at them. Unbeknownst to him, Doric knew he was looking at her horns. After much stalling, Y/N finally mustered up the courage to ask her if he could feel her “abnormal” appendages as they were lounging at their campsite

Y/N: Hey, uh, Doric?

Doric: Yeah (she turns her head to Y/N)

Y/N: (gulps) I uh was wondering if I could-

Doric: Feel my horns? (She raises an eyebrow at him)

Y/N: Well, yeah…

Doric: Fine, but make it quick

Y/N: (his eyes light up and he makes his way to her before gingerly placing two fingers on her horns) oooh… (he says with adoring eyes as he rubs them up and down)

Doric: (embarrassed but happy that someone appreciates her horns considering how many people hated her appearance) Ok that’s enough! (She jerks head back suddenly)

Y/N: Oh what? That’s it??? (He says kinda disappointed)

Doric: I’m not a fidget toy!

#5 Y/N x rat Doric

Doric likes to sometimes turn into a mouse and nestle in Y/N’s hair. Y/N allows this as long as she doesn’t transform while on his head.

Edgin: (Singing a song and playing his lute but stops when Y/N walks by) Um Y/N don’t freak out but there’s a rat on your head.

Y/N: I know (he continues walking without turning to Edgin) oh could you keep it down my girlfriend’s trying to sleep.

[piss-pumpkin]

ok i’m very curious - can i ask abt spatial horror? 👀

Omg hi I’m gonna go off about it now

Spacial horror describes how the physical space/setting in a piece of media is used to enhance/convey the horror. And idk I’m a huge slut for it here are some of my fav examples of things that have great use of spatial horror below the cut (my ass did not proofread)

House of leaves:

one of the main ways this book creates horror and conveys its main theme is through the house. The house reacts and responds to the characters deep rooted trauma and insecurities and warps around them. The horror builds from the idea that it’s wrong. At first, the house expands by like 1/4 of an inch, and it’s like bait, just a little taste because the house knows that Navidson is easily tempted, and once it has him, it creates a physical abyss that parallels the mental one he’s trapped in.

The labyrinth spaces of house are constantly described as cold, vast and dark and used to create an oppressive and foreign feeling, turning the image of a suburban home into an alien entity. That turning of normal into alien starts in the 5 and a half minute hallway, but it quickly spreads through even the unaffected areas of the house as the characters both desperately try and make it normal, or chase the abnormal to a dangerous degree. Their whole lives become dangerous and alien within the confines of the house.

The way the house creates space and danger runs alongside the way space and distance and conflict is created between the characters. Caution and exploration create expanses and voids, confidence creates clearer paths, confusion creates winding mazes, and when Navidson decides to venture in for his last time, the house envelopes him and destroys him. (But love creates doors and openings)

There is no monster in House of Leaves, no Minotaur in the labyrinth, just the characters and the things that a cruel place brings out of them.

“Gods a house. Which is not to say that our house is Gods house, or even a house of God. What I mean to say is that our house is God.”

Skinamarink:

Honestly my read of this movie is different then a lot of what I’ve seen on Tumblr,,, like the idea that it’s about like the liminal feeling of being awake at a time you aren’t suppose to as a child never rlly connected w/ me, so I interpreted it different.

I read Skinamarink as a commentary on horror as a genre. Most of the shots of this movie are of the house, whether a wall, window (or lack thereof) or corner, the house is the star of the film. The movie makes us hyperaware of the space the kids occupy.

Since it’s a horror movie, we go in with the expectation that there is a monster, ghost, supernatural something, whatever, and the film uses out expectations against us. It’s like the camera, in its obscure focus on dark corners, invites us to look for a monster. Like that’s what horror fans are trained to do when we see shit like that.

Skinamarink utilizes the expectations of a haunted house to make us want to see a monster. It’s a slow burn, but my thesis on this movie ultimately comes to how the direction makes the audience the monster, and it ends up as a commentary on horror as a genre. And the use of expectations for the house makes that possible. In the beginning, the windows and doors vanish, trapping the kids inside, so we’re primed to think there’s some sort of ghost or smth, and we carry that expectation throughout the film. I come to the conclusion that we create the monster with those expectations.

“Put the knife in your eye”

Fear and hunger:

This game has one of the most oppressive atmospheres ever it’s so crazy. The dungeons of feta and hunger are a crushing and evil place that’s been transformed and mutated, and change the people who venture into it.

There is no good end to fear and hunger. Even the best ending for the characters, where they achieve their goals. If cahara escapes with all the money, he’s forever haunted by the dungeons. If d’arce revives l’garde he has forever changed for the worse and they will wreak mayhem until death. By playing the game, you’ve already doomed the characters.

There are monsters inside, but the true horror is the dungeon itself. The creatures inside have been trapped, allured, tormented, and they fight you, but the true enemy is the space itself, and is inescapable even when you get out.

The dungeons of fear and hunger are the scariest part of that game and story. And you have to watch the character grapple and try their best under the crushing weight of an evil place.

“A terrifying presence has entered the room…”

Conclusion:

I love when physical space is used for horror. Like there’s so many ways, whether by warping around the characters, twisting something familiar into something foreign, forcing the viewer into it, playing with expectations, or just being a crushing and evil place.

When a place is an entity in itself, whether literally or metaphorically, it’s really juicy for me idfk. Everyone should read house of leaves it made me cry like 4 times in my first read.

Spatial horror I find far more inescapable, too. You can run from a killer, or fight back, but can you fight against your own home? You’re one person, can you tear down the dungeons of fear and hunger? The camera forces you into the Skinamarink house, there nothing you can do. And the house traps the kids real good.

Idk man spatial horror just scratches that itch for me

[lighthouseas]

okay i love the wheelers. so much. i want to make that very clear. but i feel like it was VERY much intentional that we can compare their family dynamic to the byers family dynamic and see the sheer differences between them.

the wheelers are clearly very well off, with little to no communication within the family; while the byers are poor and are very close with good communication.

nancy and mike interact very little onscreen, and when they do, they’re usually arguing.  not that that’s abnormal for siblings - it’s not - but when you compare that to will, jonathan, and el’s relationship? hm.

will, jonathan, and el have interacted a lot together onscreen.  mike, nancy, and holly almost never do. i think there’s like. 1 instance in s2 where mike talks to holly, and that’s it.

additionally, there’s also very little physical affection between the wheeler siblings; we LITERALLY see, at the end of s4, joyce hugging her sons while nancy and mike stand and...watch?? now, before you come after me, i’m not saying they don’t care about each other - they do.  but they’ve clearly grown accustomed to just. not being affectionate, and hmmm smth smth conformity smth smth lying smth smth trying to look as normal as possible - 

joyce is hardworking, determined, and very aware of what’s going on with the ud.  while yes, this is mainly due to will going missing in s1, karen could’ve also easily figured out what is going on (hell, her son literally hid a child in the basement for a week) but she didn’t.  she consciously ignored it - i say consciously because in s3, holly was pointing out the trees very obviously moving and karen just told her to “look at the fireworks”.  which begs the question - does karen actually know some of what’s going on, but is just choosing to ignore it? if this is true, in s5, karen is going to be forced to become aware of the ud, because it’s quite literally destroying her hometown.

we’ve also seen joyce act affectionate towards her kids; hugging them, kissing their heads, etc etc. when have we seen karen do that? VERY little, especially in later seasons.  i think the most emotional we’ve seen her get is with nancy in s3, after nancy gets fired (that whole scene honestly had a lot to unpack about karen’s character, which i will maybe make another post about).

bottom line: just. the fact that these two families pop up the most in the series is SO telling.  we are meant to compare them. we are meant to notice the very obvious differences in their dynamics and how it affects nancy, mike, and karen in particular.  and something tells me this is going to come into play in s5.  wheelers i am keeping you in a little terrarium and watching you scurry around

[toomuchdickfort]

Man h ever just have a moment where u remember smth and go hm. Did that affect me more than I thought. Anyhow when I started wearing a back brace my dad tried to scare tactic me into using it (as if I wouldn’t have anyways bc it was patterned and I was like 1: oo corset and 2: I can just knock on this hard plastic. It’s funny) by showing me images of scoliosis surgery and like. Squints. Idk if that would’ve leaned more into me being abnormal abt gore (fan of it) or abnormal abt gore (it can fuck me up for days sometimes if I think abt it slightly too hard). Or maybe both. Anyhow um I do think it’d b funny if I continue to find things I’m a lil weird abt that are because of dad that he like. Would never accept being the cause of lmao

[daz4i]

while ratio being Just Some Guy is most likely the case and fits him narratively, i do love the hc/theory that he's not quite human (either smth supernatural or just a different humanoid species. tho i obviously enjoy the first one more)

1. there's smth abt a character constantly reminding you, the viewer, that they are one thing only to be revealed as the opposite. so like him constantly reminding you that he's just a regular mundane human with nothing special about him can come off as sus

1a. i will say tho. playing it straight and not revealing anything ever beyond showing that he's just an extremely weird and eccentric human is funny

1b. that being said!!! my favorite take on that is that he's not human but wants to be one so bad bc he loves humanity. bc that's so cute and another trope i love. that's why i don't like theories abt him *becoming* not human bc it seems even more antithetical to who he is as a character

2. it'll explain some weird little details abt him that don't quite make sense for a normal human. bc like. i get that he's very smart but on a practical level, achieving the things he has should be impossible in what is likely a short time frame

2a. most recent example i can think of is him sending tb a file that takes "just one amber era" to read, which, from what i gathered, is about couple of years. so he compiled all this information while also working on the divergent universe while on a mission in penacony. and if these first 2 things took him a few years then he did them while developing weapons and curing space cancer and writing whatever he did to get him his phds (so like, a few book-length theses probably) which was probably already a few years ago by the time we meet him, and he's supposedly very young for someone with his achievements so probably in his early 30s at most. idk how to find this post rn but someone calculated that he has either been teaching for 10 or more years by now (which. let me remind you. he started *after* getting his 8th phd) or that he taught like. an insane amount of courses every year to reach the number he did. supposedly while also working for the guild + developing all these aforementioned things + doing his own research like what he's been doing on the space station. does he ever sleep. how is he in such a good shape and able to preach about health when it's like physically impossible to do all that within such a short timespan. even if you've got a genius brain like that's just too much going on at once

2b. sorry that last point was so long. this one is shorter bc it's abt smaller examples, like him disappearing abnormally fast while talking with aventurine, or this little fourth wall break of him referring to himself as a supporting character. floating on some invisible chair might be an imaginary powers thingie so i'll let that slide but he's on thin ice

2c. all the little implications that he's old. like OLD old. his recommendation letter being described as yellowed paper. that one occurrence in gold and gears that mentions him, despite occuring around 2000 years ago

3. why do his eyes glow. why are his pupils cat-like. i get that it's for aesthetic reasons probably but it's still goddamn weird especially the pupils bc iirc there is at least SOME explanation for why other hsr characters have weird eyes, but nothing about him.

(i totally used this numbering format wrong huh. forgive me it is 2 am i'm typing this bc i couldn't sleep. btw while i'm at it lemme apologize for all the grammar errors and missing words and such that are all totally there only bc of how tired i am and no other reason whatsoever)

there are, however, contradictions to the theory of course

as already mentioned, it kinda goes against his Point as a character in the story. like he SHOULD be normal that's why he's the foil for the geniuses

speaking of. if he is something beyond human, why seek the recognition of nous? if he's some powerful and possibly immortal being, why would that matter for him enough to try?

there's probably more i'm forgetting now but lbr it's mostly that first point lol.

ok so establishing all that. what even IS he?

option 1: immortal, over 2000 years old

boring. i don't like it. but i gotta acknowledge it bc as things stand it's probably the most likely one...? (other than him being Just Some Guy lol)

so there's everything i mentioned abt his achievements not making any sense in the timeframe he was likely alive, as well as the intelligentsia guild occurrence that mentions him

i don't like it bc it kind of implies that his main achievements were coined thousands of years ago. iirc he was invited to the guild *after* he achieved those. so did he only teach 50ish classes and didn't get any more phds over the span of 2000 years?? (it's possible we just don't have that information but. given how abnormally exceptional he is. why leave his other work out? he already doesn't seem humanly possible so. what's the harm in going further? will add a comedic effect to it too at some point)

also it's basic. boo

option 2: aha emanator

worm theory go brrr (i can't embed the link on mobile unfortunately but i can dm it or leave it in the replies if anyone needs it 🫡)

worm stuff aside tho. the fourth wall break and things just generally being Weird and so damn silly about him. his bust can count as a mask. aha having an owl symbol on the same side as the shoulder he has his owl symbol on. his eyes having aha's color scheme. we don't know quite what powers aha gives their followers afaik, but like the disappearing quickly thing is smth sampo does too, for example, and we know that he's a follower of aha. so who's to say all the other weird things about him are aha's work too?

there's the question on if he is like, an unwilling emanator that aha forced powers onto, or that possibly he is like zhongshan and just pulling an insane bluff

(given that the only times we see him sow chaos it is for a very clear purpose that has nothing to do with joy, i lean more towards the first)

also he embodies elation for me bc every time i see him i'm elated. is this anything

option 3: literally anything else man idk the hsr universe is so big every 2 patches we get a whole new faction or planet mentioned so who knows what else can be out there

possibly making him just go. very fast. he has lived [insert normal amount of years] but experienced much more in them than a normal human would

possibly having some powers like. fuck idk man. freezing time?

possibly able to split himself into multiple beings? (would certainly add a layer to his statues and especially the way they were presented in his trailer)

option 4: stealing that one straight from my fav fic actually (once again can't embed a link but it's "what do you want" by The_smallest_chibi on ao3!) but also altering it a little. something happened that caused him to *lose* his humanity, but he is trying to cling back to it. so he's possibly only slightly older than he seems but like this allows him to do things normal humans can't or go through life without needing things that normal people might, like food sleep etc.

i don't think it's very likely for the actual game i just wanted to tell you to go read this fic it's really good 👍

this is all i have for you now. i might repost (and this time tag) this later in a more organized and hopefully less rambling way with all necessary links and screenshots maybe. but don't count on that too much :P

[mcl38]

why did i think u were british this whole time. i just now noticed the romanian and i have been following u for an embarrassingly long time. omg i'm so sorry.

i was going to ask u if the UK is really this puritanical bc like. i was raised by some right-wingers who taught me that if i even danced with someone i was not married to, i would spend eternity burning in hell, and i still couldn't rlly bring myself to care abt a guy in his mid-20s making sex jokes enough to be offended abt it. but i mean u are not british so that doesn't matter now.

this also begs the question why are ppl getting moral/life advice from multimillionaires. like if lando gets a STD, he just goes and gets treatment. if an american gets a STD, they go bankrupt. u rlly have to put how promiscuous u can be in perspective of ur circumstances unless u want gangrenous genitals from chlamydia. also like if ur george russell or lance stroll or max verstappen or— and u physically harm someone, all u have to do is issue an apology. if ur quite literally a normal person, ur going to jail for that shit like u cannot behave like a multimillionaire under any circumstances unless u are also a multimillionaire bc one of three things will happen: 1) jail, 2) bankruptcy, 3) the end.

sorry for making u read my incoherent thoughts again but i know u appreciate a good landogate. i just don't really get this one. like wow local man in his twenties cracks nsfw jokes w his friends and experiences horniness. did these people never become traumatized by omegle. bc this isn't abnormal behavior for a man in his 20s spotted in the wild online. it's actually quite tame.

hi anon! so like first off ur not entirely wrong abt the british thing - i am romanian but ive been living in the uk for like 4 years now, u mightve seen a reference to that and assumed i was english. but bc ive been living there for a while i can quite confidently say that no, english people are not generally puritanical at all, much less than in america anyways. maybe theres more value put on decorum and politeness but i generally associate religiously-fuelled prudishness with american protestantism lmao. anyways

my thing is ive just come back from a vacation where i had no roaming so i genuinely have no idea whether ive missed smth major lmao. from what i could tell the thing ur talking abt is lando making dirty jokes on stream and ppl allegedly getting upset at that (??) which unless thats all been happening on twitter and i just havent seen it bc i deleted the app (god bless) (likely), the whole 'drama' seems to stem from one clickbait article by a clickbait sports news publication that seems to b based in india rather than the uk. was this abt the way landos (british) friends responded to him on stream? bc from what i could tell they were also participating in the moaning and calling themselves daddy activities. otherwise like what predominantly british public did u see upset? its quite odd as a thing to happen

not saying this isnt a pattern w lando tho - back in 2020 idk if u were around but if u were, u should rmbr how dire the situation was. basically anyone who'd make a sex joke around lando was essentially corrupting god's most darlingest little baby boy, how dare they. theres a certain amount of infantilisation around lando that thank god isnt happening as much anymore but maybe its reared its ugly head again. or, if ppl r getting mad at him for Corrupting His Audience (if theyre getting mad at all - again ive only seen ppl saying it was totally fine and funny), then this just represents his full flip into the whore part of the madonna whore dichotomy. the same reason miley cyrus twerking at the 2013 vmas wouldve been so much more scandalous than another female singer that hadnt previously had a child-friendly teen star image.

i dont rly know how to address the whole life advice paragraph - i rly dont think lando talking abt a girl character in fortnite shooting cream out of her palms or propellers or smth is exactly life advice. lando specifically has quite a complicated relationship w his position as a role model and he often worries abt the 'advice' he gives ppl - smth thats also like, true, hes a v sheltered 23 year old who lacks a lot of normal life experiences bc his professional career basically started around age 7. idrk what to say abt the whole std thing bc like not only have i not heard lando talk actual details abt his potential promiscuity beyond a couple vague jokes, but also bc ive never had to think abt going into debt over chlamydia doamne pazeste. also like idk if i push someone nothing happens but if max verstappen does it on an international broadcast he has to do community service for it so ����🏻‍♀️ u win some u lose some. not rly sure of the point u wanted to make if im totally frank lol

tldr like yeah f1 drivers r mainly irresponsible athletes in an extreme sport and u shouldnt model ur life after them. but also op ur life sounds terrifying like 'jail / bankrupcy / the end' sounds like either the way US capitalism works (big up the prison industrial complex) or oscar wilde's new years resolutions in january 1895 lmao

[tomopri]

time for another abno oc *thumbs up* This one is tied to two of my other ones (puck and chainsaw; she's actually. chainsaw's mom + puck's sister. dw about possibility i'm literally just doing whatever at this point)

decided morgan would get smth kinda like you'd see on the wiki or in the encyclopedia so here we go (will be reiterating some stuff from the image);

The Green Lady (sometimes referred to as Morgan; it's not stated clearly as to why, but it's assumed as a reference to The Green Lady from Arthurian legend.)

Subject Classification: F-01-65

E-Boxes: 10

Attack Type: BLACK (1~2)

Risk Level: ZAYIN

This Abnormality is Capable of Instadeath

This Abnormality is Capable of Employee Alteration

This Abnormality can Benefit the Facility

Good Mood Range: 8-10

Norm Mood Range: 6-7

Bad Mood Range: 0-5

"Have you seen him? What have they done with my baby brother?" - The Green Lady's Entry

The Green Lady (F-01-65), also known as Morgan, is a pale woman in a ragged, green dress with plants for limbs; branches as her left arm and leg, and vines as her right. She has short blonde hair with two pigtail-like bits of hair and a very small 'antenna' piece of hair. There are leaves growing out of her face. She has severely damaged wings, with her right having part of it replaced by a large piece of leaf.

Rather than standing in the center of her containment, she rests on her knees in the corner.

Ability

Her special ability is triggered once any work is finished, though the effect differs based on the result. After a Good work result, she grants the employee a crown that appears to resemble a small wreath. The crown heals +12 SP and +7 HP every few seconds (2~4) and remains until the end of the day. After a Normal work result, she grants the employee a necklace that resembles the branches of her left side. The necklace heals +6 SP and +7 HP every few seconds (3~6). After a Bad work result, she grants the employee a vine wrapped around one of their arms. The vine heals +2 SP every 10 seconds, but severely lowers their work success rate.

Getting two bad results in a row will cause the vines to rapidly engulf the employee(s) and suffocate them. The employee will be considered Dead near the beginning of the animation.

If more than 5 employees (not counting The False Fae/Puck/F-01-38, if he's in the facility) obtain the gift, they will all take decent White Damage (15~20) for the next few seconds (anywhere from 3 to 6 seconds, with damage occurring each second) before all gifts are removed. All of these gifts will disappear once the day is completed.

When an employee who finished a task with The False Fae works on The Green Lady, the success rate goes up by 20%.

Sending The False Fae to work with The Green Lady has a guaranteed perfect P.E. output

Origin

Despite being named after Morgan Le Fay from the Legend of King Arthur, she appears to have no ties to the story. Showed up at the corporation on her own, dragging herself in on barely functioning legs while calling for her 'baby brother'. She claims this is the place 'those monsters' dragged him.

Details

The Green Lady responds to the four works in order of best to worst: Attachment, Insight, Instinct, and Repression.

Like all Abnormalities, her energy output is determined by the number of PE Boxes at the end of the interaction.

im notdoing the rest of this right now this already took way longer than i expected LMAO

[fagwolf-archive]

benrey and gman species headcanons!!!!

so i was thinking about benreys abilities and as i wrote out headcanons i decided u know what. i think benrey and gman are the same species. so here are some thoughts about their species:

- massive eldritch horrorterrory creatures, literally incomprehensible to the human brain. youd probably die if you saw their true forms, your brain would just overload and shut down

- so to exist in the science teams universe, they make themselves appear humanlike juzt so they dont accidentally kill people. also just for practicalities sake - way easier to walk through a door if youre human sized hsjfkhsdjk

- ofc they only LOOK human - theyre still all fucked up and monstery and can shapeshift. gman is older than benrey and has pretty much full control at all times over his form, benrey meanwhile struggles a bit to maintain it and forgets stuff about humans - like that their limbs dont bend that way, or their heads cant turn 180 degrees, or that they only have one row of teeth

- they are a mainly Predator Species and so a lot of their biology fits this!!!:

- bioluminescent eyes act as lure like anglerfish - and also sweet voice! ill go a bit more into sweetvoice in a moment but in hunting context, its used as pretty, hypnotic lure for prey and also to calm prey and induce docility and prevent fighting back (benrey doesnt rlly hunt so he just uses it to calm down gordon when he thinks hes too mad)

- benrey in particular’s “huh? whuh?” thing is cause natural predator instinct to hyperfocus on one thing coupled with Neurodivergency means he finds it really difficult to switch conversation topics or pay attention to multiple things at once.

- i thought a lot about communication as well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:

- their species has 3 basic forms of communication, or at least those are the 3 ive thought about:

- 1 is nonverbal - thats a LOT of their communication. body language, certain types of blinking or finger movement etc communicates tons. just like a species like a cat or rabbit.

- 2 is how they talk to their young. again, like cats, eldritches have a reserved form of communication (like meowing) for their babies. this is telepathy - they use it to talk directly and comfortingly to their kids and to immediately figure out what they need. this has also evolved into how they talk to humans - like cats meow at humans cause they see them as big babies.

- and eldritches dont actually speak english, they telepathically convert their language to whatever the humans mother tongue is, projecting the language straight into their head. annoying comparison, but like the tardis’ telepathic field in dr who.

- added onto this, this is why benreys english gets worse when hes emotional. e.g: “im a great cool, so now i gonna be bad”. he struggles more to keep up the telepathy when hes upset or ecstatic, so his english sounds more distorted.

- and ALSO benrey forgets as well that humans cant communicate telepathically. hell respond to something someone thought or read their emotions and react accordingly/get them what they need and he’ll be SO confused when theyre like “wtf how did you do that”

- 3 is SWEETVOICE!!! this is a big part of all assets of their language - its a simple ingrained way to communicate simple emotions and greetings etc, like “nice to meet you” “i like you” “i am feeling angry, dont talk to me” etc.

- gman doesnt use it as much because its generally considered a more simplistic and childish way to talk, as its the first way children learn to communicate outside of telepathy to express their basic emotions. benrey uses it a lot because he Likes It!!!!!!!! it easily expresses what hes trying to say.

- this is also why tommy knows how to read sweetvoice - personally i believe hez human and was adopted by gman but gman still taught him how to read sweetvoice. as hes adopted he cant do it himself, but hes the one who understands benreys communication the best cause he was raised by an eldritch

- the skeletons!! eldritches can create entities to assist them, theyre not living creatures they only exist while the species wants them to. benreys are the skeletons - they help him in the final battle and everything.

- benreys also a younger, weaker eldritch than gman is, and uses his skeletons in a slightly different way. the skeleton that asks gordon for his passport isnt ACTUALLY benrey, its an entity benrey has created while hes temporarily dead to project himself out of while his actual form is rebuilding itself in Limbo.

- i believe the whole thing gman was saying about benrey needing to be contained and everything after he was “killed” is just cause hes an abnormally immature/emotional eldritch, and is pretty outcasted and chaotic as far as things go. like usually these creatures are out being Space Diplomats or apex predators or smth meanwhile benrey just likes Being Around Humans And Playing Video Games :] hes looked down upon a bit

[moon-lords-lower-body]

I posted 107 times in 2021

14 posts created (13%)

93 posts reblogged (87%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 6.6 posts.

I added 29 tags in 2021

#terraria - 13 posts

#happy pride :] - 2 posts

#oh this is so cool - 2 posts

#long post - 2 posts

#true - 2 posts

#my art - 2 posts

#:o - 2 posts

#woooooooooo - 2 posts

#its terraria related enough but mostly go give money to my friend - 1 posts

#i was gonna say me in 5th grade when i first got into the game but tbh? me now also - 1 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#ive still got the two versions operating simultaneously and the terraria one i think is still decently in line with how he was originally

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

"Fuck you my child is fine" your child has the full zenith crafting tree memorized with the swords and materials to make the other swords

34 notes • Posted 2021-01-09 17:05:10 GMT

#4

This is a crossover niche that like 2 people are gonna understand but since ive got simultaneous Lobotomy Corporation and Terratia brainrot allow me to share some things on my mind

- Lunatic Cultist abnormality. Probably one of those ones thats like an aleph disguised as zayin or like, Brings Forth an aleph like punishing bird to apocalypse bird or plague doctor to whitenight. Like hes a zayin or teth that Can escape and like, if you dont get to him fast enough when he does escape he summons the moon lord which obv is a big ol aleph.

- Nothing There hardmode crimson monster, especially in bipedal ultra death kill mode

- empress of light honorary magical girl

- OH OH OK SPEAKING OF ZAYIN/TETH ABNOS THAT ARE SECRETLY ALEPH? The guide.

- something something if like, an agent dies with the guide's gift on them (a guide voodoo doll obv) then the guide dies/escapes/smth aaaand bam wall of flesh its aleph time baby! Can you tell i like alephs

- id kill to see a terrar texture pack that replaces certain weapons/armors/accessories even? With lobcorp EGO gear. That may already exist

- idk anything abt library of ruina sorey

36 notes • Posted 2021-09-10 16:26:57 GMT

#3

Hmm yes today i am going to share one of my terraria charas not connected to mlsp (that i shouldve shared llike a month ago but is ok)

"Tv" "Personality" IRON DYNAMO

Made him for a multiplayer thing w some friends :] former tv host from basically 1970s america who Died and was put in hit 2011 video game Terraria with most of his body parts replaced with mechanical parts, his head replaced with a tv, and his general form Very Radioactice. Strange fella indeed. :]

Other various art ⬇️

- alt outfit that i like a lot

- ref for his diff Screens which in fact are just the diff screens for the tv head vanity item in terraria

- beach episode :D

- pixel art that i just think is neat

- wht he looked like before dying but also its in the style of that game Smile For Me its a very good game you should play it or watch a playthrough of it

36 notes • Posted 2021-05-06 18:22:26 GMT

#2

10 years!! 10 YEARS!!!!!! Terraria is now officially as old as i was when i first started playing terraria fun fact

im drawing smth more Extravagant later but its gonna be A Lot tbh so in case i get that out late here's this

38 notes • Posted 2021-05-16 17:04:45 GMT

#1

straight friend groups be like: *blonde girl* *chad* *the funny one* *kyle* *brunette girl* *frat boy* 

Gay friend groups be like: *the guide* *the merchant* *the nurse* *the dryad* *the arms dealer* *the demolitionist* *the goblin tinkerer* *the mechanic* *the clothier* *the

270 notes • Posted 2021-07-10 15:55:47 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[avellanas-nutty-empire]

autistic anon here ! i cant speak for other autistic people bc every one of us is different but for me autism is - im v sensitive to sounds, to lights, to everything basically. -stimming ! i have a lot of stims for example when im excited i bounce on my leg (like a toy spring) or i swing from left to right when I'm upset or trying to distract myself i hum or do "fish sound" ( like i open and close my mouth really fast) i also like to collect dice :> im also really sensitive and cry easily (1)

Thankyou for sharing!!! The way I experience ADHD and Dyslexia is also different from how other people experience it, but it's still categorized with a general overview to help other people understand better. Although some people dont get that and are stoopid, but we pretend like they dont exist cause if they invalidate us like that then they themselves are invalid :) hahaha it's a 2 way sword

For me personally, loud noises scare me literaly more than death and my family would always yell at me to stop being 'extra' about it cause 'it's not THAT loud' aparently. Like excuse you, I would like to be able to hear when I am older plz turn the volume down but it also lowkey scares me shitless but aparently that's not valid so >:/

I think the swedes would quickly learn how exactly things like sound and light affect you, and they wouldent see anything abnormal about when you go silent for a while. Since the swedes them selves hardly talk at all, they pritty much are 100% cool with it and can properly handle your silent communication.

I totaly headcannon Oscar having ADHD so actions like bouncing you leg, swinging from side to side, and the fish sound thing are nothing strange to them. If anything, they are glad that language is a little more coded for you, since for Oscar it all just had one meaning.

The cats love you. If they want pets, they walk right up to you cause they know their fluffiness temps you and they use it to their advantage. If you and Oscar go to a fabric store or smth, he WILL drag you around to find the softest material and then just bury his face in it. At one point Oscar and Otto are tempted to like, knit or sew something really soft for you. Mabey like a scarf or smth you can just grab and feel whenever u want. Which actually reminds me of this weird thingy thing that I dont know what it's called, but it's like a rope thing you make with your hands. Like you weave it on your fingers instead of on a loom or using knitting needles or smth. When I was younger I just made them as long as I could even though I didnt use them for anything. Heres a pic of a short one that I tied knots into when I was younger (I'll try and figgure out if my mom knows what its called) if I could, I would use up an intire thing of yarn making those dont tempt me. ESPECIALY THE SOFT YARN

If you ever get super emotional the swedes know just what to do to make u feel better. Cuddled? Hug? Kisses? Food? Back rubs? Alone time? Whatever it may be, they will provide. Oscar may or may not also meow back to the cats, making you guys not alone buddies. Not being born in america, the swedes have a hard time understanding american and English jokes so dont worry. They are more serious people anyways, so jokes and sarcasm arent really their thing.

I however, LOVE puns and my discord and minecraft username is actually Pun Empress >:) I use the super power of my dyslexia to find similarity between words to make the play on words and everyone either hates or loves me for it. A battle I am willing to fight.

Thankyou again for sharing with us!!! I hope this made you feel better and plz contact me if I accidentally said anything offensive or misleading, I will change it <3 have a wonderful day!!!!

Edit: idk if you are also getting notifications for it or not, but people are commenting on the last ask you sent in that I answered and basicaly, we all support and care for you. You are valid.

[catravandece]

10 Female Favs From 10 Different Fandoms

Thank 2 @piyo-13 for this wonderful food 

1- Sophie Hatter (Howl’s Moving Castle)

She is my perennial fav. I loved her in the Ghibli movie but I stanned her in the book. Trying to explain why I love her so much has to be its own post lmao

2- Haleth (The Silmarillion)

Idk what it is about her but the combo of ‘warrior lady, famous friendship, leader in her community’ just hits smth in me. art credit @dakkun39. 

3- MianMian (MDZS/CQL)

I’m gay and hate the establishment of injustice

4- Saphira (Eragon)

I’m exposing one my my earliest obsessions here lol. I haven’t reread the books in a while but I straight up never paid attention in 7th grade history I was either reading Twilight or Eragon/Eldest. Big Lizard Is My Oldest Friend. 

5- Holly Short (Artemis Fowl)

I didn’t start reading Artemis Fowl until high school and disclaimer I never finished the series bc college. I love how she’s really her own protagonist and not just the other half of a Holly & Artemis duo. Also the comic design is my stickiest idea for how she looks but She’s Brown Motherfuckers

6- Amanda Grayson (Star Trek)

SPACE. MOM. God I fucking love her and hate JJA for having the audacity to fridge her. Did you know she was on the team that invented the Universal Translator? Did you know she got all kinds of shit for entering one of the first interspecies marriages and replied to rude journos with dick jokes??? Did you know she is my role model and alien lover Idol?

7- Usagi Tsukino (Sailor Moon)

Ok in my adulthood I know I’m more like Makoto/Jupiter (tall girl LIGHTNING abnormal femininity) but Usagi is just made of kid me dreams. Moon princess magical girl destiny child long blonde hair flowy dress and cool style true love and group of best friends forever. 

8- Jyn Erso (Rogue One)

I just have a lot of feelings about found family ok

9- Avatar Kyoshi (ATLA)

Again, I’m gay and hate the establishment of injustice. Lady Strong I’m Gay. 

10- Noriko Tachiki (Kanata Kara/From Far Away)

One of my best friends recced me this series years ago and I’m still mildly obsessed with it lmao. I am an absolute FOOL for “female lead gets transported thru time/into fantasy world”. She’s got romance, cool outfits, language learning finesse and unshakeable drive in the face of danger. I wish I could find more isekai like Kanata Kara and Red River and Fushigi Yuugi. 

This list is in no particular order lmao. Honorable mentions go to: Furiosa (MMFR), Yuri Suzuki (Red River), Amy Dyer (In The Flesh), Adora (She-Ra 2018), Yoo Eun Soo and Queek Nogook (Faith)

EDIT: forgot to tag ppl lmaoo. Calling out @wifihunters​, @mosshermit​, @daydreamingaquarius​ and @beyondtheeluvian​

[missmentelle]

Sorry to bother you but I've had an issue recently with my mom. She and I had an argument about a month ago and since then she's been really mad at me, but whenever we have an argument she never talks to me unless I talk to her first. I never know what to do abt it. It was my birthday a few weeks ago & she completely ignored me. I started crying and she had no sympathy, she just told me to talk to her privately in my room, but I didn't want to. I didn't get anything from her for my birthday. 1/?

Since then we haven't spoken, except when I say hello to her when she walks in and that's it. My question is, is that normal? Do you have any advice on how I can talk to her? I wish she'd just maybe apologise or smth because it really hurt my feelings, but she's never apologised to me abt this kind of thing in the 18 years that I've been living on this planet. 

Hey, this is super abnormal, and I’m really sorry to hear that you are going through it. At 18 years old, you still need your parents to act like parents, and your mother is not doing that right now. Her role right now is to be the adult in the relationship, and offer you patience, kindness and guidance as you navigate the world - her role should not involve giving you the silent treatment for a month and ignoring your birthday to punish you for disagreeing with her. That’s completely out of line. 

Healthy parents have an obligation to “be the bigger person” in their relationships with their children, and put their own pride and ego aside when it comes to dealing with their children. That’s what you sign up for when you become a parent. My siblings and I all said some incredibly insensitive and hurtful shit to our parents during our teen years, and our parents’ response was always something along the lines of “You hate me? Oh, okay, that’s fine. Did you want rice or pasta with dinner tonight, honey?”. My parents never held grudges against us and never withdrew affection from us, because they understood that they were adults coming into these interactions with all the power and life experience, and that we were teens who were still trying to figure things out and occasionally said over-the-top shit we didn’t mean. Parents who prioritize their own ego over their child’s social and emotional development are doing their children a huge disservice, and frankly, they lack the emotional maturity to be parents. 

Unfortunately, it sounds like what your mother is doing to you right now is part of a normal ongoing pattern of behaviour for her, which means there’s not much you can do. Always bending over backwards to please your mother and make sure her feelings always come first is not a realistic solution to the problem; it’s just putting a band-aid over the problem until the next time your mother decides that her feelings are hurt. At this point, I don’t think you’re going to gain much by trying to understand your mother’s behaviour or mend bridges with her. I think your time and emotional energy would be better spent on coping with your mother’s emotional neglect, accepting the idea that your mother’s behaviour is not normal, and starting to build a support network of friends and chosen family who will give you the love and support that is currently missing from your life. I would also recommend starting to look into outside supports - therapy would be ideal, but support groups of people who have also been through similar experiences (like Reddit’s r/raisedbynarcissists) would also be a good place to start. Best of luck to you 

[jaeminlore]

witch!mark

cue smrookies halloween video w the dreamies lol

mark has been practicing magic for as long as he can remember??

like as soon as his parents realized he had the ability to harness magic,, they put him in the closest magic school

which is lowkey just some shady tutor witch who teaches children down in her basement-turned-classroom

but mark loved it!

he learned how to use a magic wand and ride a broom and brew potions,,,, and he was so happy to meet other kids who had the same powers as him

but unfortunately the witch woman only taught kids through first grade :(

so mark had to move to human school

and elementary school was filled w bullies who knew abt marks abnormalities just bc sometime mark can’t control his powers

so he rlly didn’t have any friends

except you!!

in fourth grade you transferred to mark’s school, and as soon as you heard the rumors you were like!!!! magic!!!!!

you’ve read all the books all you know is that mark could bc the key to having a magical fantasy life and you’re ready for it

so you find him in the library and you’re rlly excited like “one time i heard you set the lab on fire by simply touching the table how cool is that pls tell me it’s real”

and mark is like ,,,,,unfortunately,,,, all the rumors are true,,,,,,

he thinks you’re going to like push him away or smth but actually you come back full force w all the excitement your seven year old body could handle “can’t you turn those mean guys into frogs? or make them trip over their own shoelaces???”

mark is like “lol don’t you think i’ve though of that,, but the number one rule of a witch is to never use magic for evil or you could turn into a bad person”

this convo is basically the start of your friendship w mark,,, and you guys end up going to the same highschool together as well

mark moved into the nct house a bit after the start of senior year, just to be around people a bit more like him

he knows haechan from highschool and got introduced to everyone as soon as he figured out haechan’s secret

you’re invited to the house all the time like everyone knows you by name and thinks you’re the funniest thing bc you love mark so much??? and it’s so obvious to everyone but him??

they can all tell (esp taeil, jaehyun, and yuta,, who have been dead alive a long time) that you are in love w him

mostly bc of the way your eyes light up whenever he’s around and how you always encourage him when he gets a spell wrong

see mark’s dream is to become an extremely powerful witch,,, and then start up a school for other kids of magic

like he knows there are a lot who have no idea how to harness their magic just bc,,, they’re scared of what might happen or who might find out

but mark wants to prove that he can teach others by becoming a good enough witch himself first

he’s always experimenting w magic

when he comes to school he smells like smoke and unidentified chemicals

his room is always a warzone, and even sicheng moved out into another room after awhile, since his werewolf senses couldn’t take it

but you love his room,, mostly bc it smells like him,,,,,, it smells like him

and the strange potions he always has brewing excite you to know end bc you’re always wondering what he’s mixing up now

so anyway you confess to mark under,,, peculiar,,, circumstances

he can to school wearing a beanie, which would be normal, except for the fact that out of all the years you’ve known him, mark has never worn a beanie

as soon as he realizes you notice, he pulls you into an empty classroom and pulls off his beanie

mark has,,,, puppy ears,,, peaking out of his hair,,, like lil golden retriever ears that flop over his black hair

you giggle “you’re so cute!!”

mark is like seriously y/n this isn’t funny i was working on this shapeshifting potion and it turned out wrong and only shifted half of me so now i have ears and a tail!!!!!!!!!!!

but his eyes are already puppy-like and he’s just,,, so cute,,, that you have to bite back another squeal “fine i’ll come over after school and we’ll figure out an antidote”

so you find yourself back in mark’s bedroom, homework discarded somewhere on the floor

the two of you had both physical books and the internet opened to try and find a way to reverse the potion’s effects

jaemin interrupts w his own pair of pointy brown ears and a grin “mark i’m just letting you know that you now qualify for me and sicheng’s club for canines”

mark throws a book at him as he leaves, giggling

you turn to mark, “have you got canines like him?”

“what?”

“like dog fangs,,, incisors,,”

mark’s like idk dude i don’t pay attention to my teeth

now you’re curious and aren’t going to get anything done until you know, so ofc you scoot over until you’re sitting right in front of mark like open your mouth and lemme see

mark grimaces but bares his teeth anyways so you can check them

“you do!! they look sharp!!”

you try to touch his teeth but mark holds your wrist back like what the heck are you doing???

but the two of you are super close

and mark is like lowkey sweating bc he’s never been this close to you physically and he lowkey wants to kiss you rn

like,,, a lot

bc he’s always sort of liked you and your curious nature and how you always encourage him to be the best he could be but he has no idea if you like him back

bc he can read tarot cards but he’s terrible at reading people

you aren’t tho thank goodness,,, and you know by the way mark is looking at you that he likes you too

so you lean in rlly close…

and press a kiss against his cheek before pulling back so quick it’s almost like it didn’t even happen

but mark is blushing so it most definitely did happen

and the both of you are flustered and neither of you wanna mention it so you’re just “okay, lets looks for this antidote!!!1!1!1!1!”

you two eventually find a potion that brews overnight

so you wouldn’t find out until the next morning if mark was back to normal or not

but you have to get home lol you have a curfew ofc

the next day at school tho,,,,, mark walks into the halls w no hat and no ears and he runs up and hugs you,,, in front of everyone!!!

and when he lets go of you he grabs your hand and blushes like extra red,,,, and he can’t look you in the eye so he just focuses on your entertained fingers

“hey,,, i rlly like you,,, and i was wondering if you would let me be your boyfriend???”

you don’t answer out of surprise so he frets nervous like “i promise it won’t be as bad as you think!!!”

and you kind of giggle and squeeze his hand back like “i would love too mark”

and as the two of you walk towards your first class you bump his shoulder with your own “I guess you could say this relationship is going to be magical”

“i can’t believe you just said that”

“regretting asking me out already, mark?”

he just shakes his head with a fond smile “never”

that is witch!mark!! i rlly like how this one turned out lol. part of my collab w @trickortaeil

[bb-bambam]

question tag

thanks for tagging me @yieniall i love u so much!!! i tag @jacksonwangtastic @jongdaesi @jongins-laugh @cutepimook @jungkookies-cookie only if u want to do it ofc!!

1| how old were you when you had your first kiss?

15 rip lmao 2| What made you decide to have a tumblr blog? for my main blog: soccer and merlin (the tv show) tbh lmaooo and for this blog it was the fact that someone told me 2 tag all my kpop and i was like lmao okay time to Make A New Blog 3| Been depressed: y e a i’m really really trying to overcome this but obvi it’s not easy and there are some rly hard days expecially considering i’m not at home where i can get support from ppl who i trust to talk abt these types of things 4| how many people have you fist fought? lmfaoooo none 5| do you want to have kids? how many? sure do!! probably 2 or 3 !! 6| Do you want to change your name: nah i’m okay with my name 7| Right or left handed: right 8| do you have piercings? how many? my ears (just one in each) and my nose (left nostril)! 9| who was the last person you cried in front of? lmfao one of my college friends bc we watched train to busan and i completely couldn’t handle it i cried 3 times 10| do you believe in soulmates? ya!! i love the idea and i fully believe that everyone has a half that they can find somewhere, whether it be platonic or romantic

11| Zodiac sign: by birth gemini but by personality/temperament/everything else cancer lol! 12| Do you have a dream job? not particularly but i do like the idea of doing smth for nasa or some space-related program someday

13| A crush: there’s this rly cute girl who i literally have never talked to in my life nor do i know her name but she’s so ideal i always catch myself staring at her when i see her walking around campus lmao 14| What do you like about yourself: my hair!!! it’s rly super long rn and i want to cut it but i also don’t bc i’m proud of how i’ve maintained it for so long!! 15| Right now eating: nothing lmaoo it’s 10 pm!! 16| who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? avani of Course 17| Height: 5′5″ 18| what is/are/were your best subject(s)?

math (especially calc 3 which i LOVE LOVE LOVE), physics, spanish (?? somehow), chem, bio (i hate both chem and bio tho lmfao)

19| Met someone who changed you:

does avani count lol i would say probably my best friend bc he really has helped me a lot especially when i was recovering from my worst period of depression and to this day i’ve never met another person who i connect with so well and who i can talk to the way i can with him and idk we’ve gone through our ups and downs but i trust him with my life and idk it’s just really nice to have someone who fits so well with me and can just randomly come over to my house for a family dinner and be unquestioningly welcomed by my whole family

20| do you like someone: is this supposed to be like,,, a crush bc wasn’t this already asked?? lol but idt that counts as “liking” her bc i don’t even know her!! it’s just a crush lol

21| I’m about to: work on my math take-home exam!!! fun stuff -__-

22| do you believe everything happens for a reason? to some extent yeah, but there are some things that i feel like just. can’t be explained or justified 23| Sports I joined: soccer and cross country, but currently i only dance  24| what’s irritating you right now? the fact that i STILL haven’t started either of the two papers i have due on monday lmao 25| do you give out second chances too easily? maybe...my mom always tells me i’m too nice for my own good and that people can easily take advantage of me which is possibly true but i wouldn’t rly know tbh 26| What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: i really really wish i had listened to my parents when they tried to make me learn hindi and marathi :/// i always feel so lost when we go to india and it sucks 27| are you mean? i try not to be as much as i can :(( 28| Cried when someone died: so so many times :( when two of my cats died, when my grandparents passed away, and also sometimes when i read news of someone i don’t even know who died i cry 29| Blood type: i’m gonna be honest...i have no clue 30| If you could meet ANY Korean CELEBRITY (Includes Actors, Models, K-Music artists, etc.), who would it be? exo without any doubt at all including the ex members :((( and got7!!

31| Birthday: june 13 32| Been drunk and thrown up: no lmaooo but i did get tipsy off two glasses of wine once and off one shot of soju another time so ya i don’t have the best tolerance lmfaooo 33| are you scared of spiders? i’m terrified of pretty much all moving creatures 34| What would you like to achieve (or experience) before the age of 60?

i want to live in spain for at least some portion of my life!! and also go to an exo concert rip

35| What do you wish for the most to happen? this may sound dumb but for ppl to wake up and realize that issues like global warming and racism are?? real things??? wtf 36| is cheating ever okay? absolutely never never never 37| Do you have any pets: mi babie cats!!! i love and miss them 38| When did you get into kpop and how? december 2015! it was all thanks to avani who showed me danger by bts (yes they were my first group but anyway) it all escalated from there!! 39| Favorite animal? cats <333 40| Love at first sight: i think it’s possible to experience attraction at first sight and the love comes later bc you need to really know a person to really “””love””” them just my opinion idk 41| how do you want to die? peacefully hopefully! 42| Lips or eyes: eyes!!! 43| Hair length: mine is almost past my hips now!! 44| would you go back in time if you were given the chance? lmao as long as no world-ending paradoxes would occur 45| who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? a guy in my abnormal psych class for a group project lmfaooo 46| how exactly are you feeling at the moment? pretty good since i have some nice exo blasting in my room rn 47| Laughed until you cry: soooo many times lmfaooooo 48| favorite food? i’m a sucker for chocolate chip cookies lmaooo 49| when was your last physical fight? LMAO with avani like,,,, 10 years ago?? idk when we stopped fighting physically and became Friends but let me tell u...we were not always the way we are now lmfaooo 50| Do you believe in yourself: on occasion lol