#but <3 why is this johnny watching peter speak

[allkinds-oftrash]

The Crown S5E9 Commentary

Non-Spoiler Review: THIS EPISODE!! This episode had the Peter Morgan writing I have loved for The Crown since S1 and that went all out in S4. I’ve been missing this spark all season and he FINALLY got it back after 8 episodes - s i r why. So far, this and Mou Mou have been the best written episodes of the season. We deserved more punchy episodes like this especially in highlighting the media war between Diana and Charles. But phew what a way to showcase the end of their marriage. I really really loved the writing of this episode! 

Spoilers Under The Cut 

The fallout of the Interview!! This should be juicy

I always appreciate how Peter Morgan uses other people or events to parallel against what's happening in the family at the time. It's just such a clever narrative device and works every time!

Also ohmygod Couple 31 - they're going to be the 31rd couple on the divorce docket aren't they!

LMAO LIZZIE WROTE THEM A LETTER TELLING THEM TO DIVORCE HSKDHJD Only took you 14 years Lizzie I'm cackling "To request a divorce" HSJDJDJ I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING Like this is so sad but also it was a long time coming and they all deserved to be free from the marriage

Oh nooo Patrick and Dr. Khan WHY 😭😭 Patrick was always there for her too dammit I mean the separation was always going to lead to a divorce Di But I can't help but still feel sad for her sigh Not the fucking press hounding her outside her therapist's office too wtf??? She deserves to drain him for all he's worth Lord knows she'll put that money to good use with her charities more than the BRF ever will

Well Camilla's prophecy from S4 came true - wasn't so much a prophecy but a prediction Girlie is the villian now and being hounded by the press Lmaooo not Charles getting her a PR expert to protect her image

LIZZIE I KNOW YOU'RE NOT MAKING POOR JOHN MAJOR THEIR DIVORCE MEDIATOR SHDKJDJD Mans really became their babysistter-therapist-marriage AND divorce counsellor this season huh This is too funny pls All the previous PMs have had serious political reports to give her And this one who I like the most so far despite him being a Tory, is set up to put out personal fires for the Royal Fam I can't stop laughing Not him listing all the suitable candidates with such obliviousness and then Lizzie drops the bomb hskdjkd

Lizzie: "What about you"

John Major: "Me?"

I DIED Johnny Lee Miller I LOVE YOU The Crown is ✨a comedy✨ yall Not her comparing this divorce to the conflict in Northern Ireland Elizabeth STOP IT Yeah he is easy to like and trust and I hate it cos he's a TORY Lmao well Lizzie he can't really say no, can he. Who the hell is going to say no to the Queen of England dhdkkds Omg he's into it?? Just cos she used the word umpire John babes don't you have a country to run?? Not his family feeling neglected 💀💀 Occupational Hazard things I guess

This Irish couple is going THROUGH IT Ngl I like these divorce couple breaks in the episode. It's really interesting

Okay Mark stop lying you can hate her too Lmao okay Camilla you made the consistent choice to do so loving him and in the process tagteamed with your lover to bully and manipulate a 19 year old so yall do not get off that easy

God this conversation is depression to watch now that she IS the Q word Also again with the "word" although in this case I get it. Better than the divorce conversations with Andrew dkdkkdkd LMAO THE CALLBACK TO TAMPONGATE I'M SCREAMING God Charles is being such a baby

John Major is really good at this I'm shook Not this motherfucker telling her never to speak publicly abt what she went through Basically paying her off to be silent LMAO DIANA "If he's hoping to stuff my mouth and hoping I gag on it, then that sum better be 8 figures and start with a 3" W H A T A L I N E

Not them sucking up to the Spin Doctor shdkjdd this is so funny

OH this dentist and hygienist's age gap and dynamic is PEAK Diana and Charles This was sad to listen to

Chucky I KNOW you're not flirting with your ex wife right now what is wrong with you Also ALL her looks are iconic "Natural" Okay stfu Chucky Yeah you never said nice things ever Chuck She's right you got everything you ever wanted He's being too nice I do not trust it nor him

Lmaooo he doesn't remember where the kitchen is She's right buddy you were never happy here This is the first time he's ever said anything I agreed with: "Why doesn't one eat scrambled eggs all the time" He's right they are a vibe

Charles: An audit of the marriage Diana: An autopsy I LOVE IT

Holy fuck this is a brilliant piece of writing Just wowow this conversation is so snappy and tight THIS is the kind of writing I've been wanting all season

It might have been mean Di but it's true the mans has always been old He has Old Energy nothing wrong with that jajjsks Lmao she called him old once and he got upset 💀💀

"You do know there was always love there" Okay Mr "Whatever In Love Means" Charles is odd wanting Di to say her name God this is a painful conversation Ofc Chucky is throwing a tantrum Not the "Ask my parents" line 💀💀

Dominic's Charles feels more restraint I can't decide if that's a good or bad Like Josh went OFF Dominic even while yelling doesn't feel as visceral?? This was an autopsy indeed Okay sorry but that was such a bad crying shot - should have just kept it a wide from the start

Lmaooo NOW the divorce court is full of the press after being empty I mean I know why it's just funny it was just the lawyers for the other couples who weren't even there and now the whole court is full They weren't even there 💀💀 Also omg imagine the person finalising THE Wales' divorce - w i l d shit Damn to end it on their wedding procession that was A Choice

Now onto the finale!

[storywestistrash]

oh god okay i am being enabled

so we have a few notable voice actors and while i cant put names to all of them i can recognize most and point to at least one other thing they were in, even if vaguely. and when i recognize a voice but cant tell from where i become quite distressed. generally i do better with male voices than female ones so sadly my fun facts will be all about dudes

first off some of our vas have certain patterns to the characters they voice. for example theres jacek kopczyński who most notably voices fred jones (scooby doo) and dandelion (the witcher) as well as nearly every single barbie prince ever. the pattern for him is that the characters usually check one of the following boxes: 1. hes a prince or something equivalent-ish 2. hes blond and 3. hes a little or a lot stupid in some sense. fred fills all three (cuz hes the son of the mayor.... i guess...... thats close enough to me), barbie love interests are either all three or at least two, dandelion is two in the games and three in the books. there are some exceptions or at least ones where i have to reach a little for example peter parker would fall into the "a little stupid in some sense" box because despite all his intelligence he is dumb in some ways.

another one with a fun pattern is the previously mentioned grzegorz pawlak who seems to mostly play lawful characters. evil or neutral mostly from what ive noticed at least but im sure there will be some goods on the list too. he also played in scooby doo (mystery inc specifically and he was the evil parrott) AND he also was in skyrim as the ghost of lucien lachance. i love his voice and honestly im probably gonna reblog this post again with a video of it bc i do think he could do a frank. and i am sorry but i might have to use penguins of madagascar footage. OH YEAH ALSO. if i remember correctly he directed and did a whole polish dubbing of some sonic thing almost entirely by himself because i guess he wanted to have his kids or grandkids watch it. i dont have any other explaination for why hed do nearly everything about it by himself

YET ONE MORE fun pattern is jacek bończyk who seems to be operating on a scale from spineless coward to sarcastic dick, and all his characters land somewhere between. he's played shaggy, anders from dragon age awakening, and the smarter lackey from barbie princess and tha pauper

speaking of princess and the pauper, and here i have no fun pattern to bring up, i just want to mention the actor, artur kaczmarski plays the cat wolfie in that one! hes also the voice of nathaniel howe (also dragon age awakening) (i have a favorite game) and, which i joked about endlessly, the polish voice of bob the builder.

as a last one ill mention michał żebrowski who is not strictly a voice actor but he DID voice johnny silverhand recently! and he did it so wonderfully that it is nearly incomprehensible to me. the way he screams and laughs and is just so incredibly energetic and almost violent in his performance is incredible and with all due respect to internet's favorite man, i do think his dubbing is miles ahead of the keanu one. he also played the witcher in the live action series from like the 1990s. i wish i could say "back when he was young and handsome" but he is still quite handsome from some angles i think. true polish hearthrob this one. very normal white man kind of look but you have to cut us some slack

ignore that this is a skyrim video and in polish but this is the polish VA of frank castle in the 1994 show and its the voice frank has in my head always. and i feel a strong need to share that with you guys bc i think it is a good voice

[littlelovelyspiderling]

Meeting The Real You (Chapter 4)

Chapter 1 -- Chapter 2 -- Chapter 3 -- Chapter 4 -- Chapter 5 -- Chapter 6 -- Chapter 7 -- Chapter 8 -- Chapter 9 -- Chapter 10 -- Chapter 11 -- Chapter 12

AO3 story link

Peter Parker can't wait to meet the newest superhero team to enter the scene: The Fantastic Four. More importantly, he can't wait to finally meet another superhero his age: 16-year-old Johnny Storm, aka the Human Torch.

That is, until he does. And Johnny turns out to be a grade-A dick.

But maybe there's more to Johnny than Peter initially thought. Maybe he's not just an egotistical media star, or a short-tempered hothead, or an alarmingly pretty face who makes Peter's pulse race. Maybe they have more in common than they realize.

And maybe this feeling that overwhelms Spider-Man anytime Johnny is around isn't jealousy after all...

word count: 4,500

_______________________________

Peter’s ears were still ringing as he walked past the long rows of lockers to find Johnny pacing along the back wall, wisps of smoke trailing off his shoulders. The door to the locker room slammed shut behind him, trapping the two teenagers inside. Peter could scarcely imagine a worse scenario: locked in a cramped space that smelled like gym socks with an explosive hothead who hated his guts. He watched the Human Torch stride back and forth a few minutes longer before huffing irritably, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Look, did I do or say something to you that made you decide to loathe me with every fiber of your being since we first made eye contact? Because I genuinely don’t understand why you hate me so much. Is it really because of the stuff you’ve heard about me from Jameson? Are you a die-hard Bugler or something?”

Johnny ignored him, continuing his steadfast patrol between the two pillars that flanked the room. Spider-Man sighed, crossing his arms against his chest. 

“Please enlighten me as to why you’re the president of Spider-Man Hate Club. Is it the way I talk? My spider-themed aesthetic? Are you arachnophobic? Or do you really just hate everything and everyone within a ten foot radius?”

“I don’t hate you!” Johnny suddenly blurted out, whirling on him. “This has nothing to do with you, okay?”

Peter frowned, caught off guard. “What has nothing to do with me? Your terrible personality?”

The Human Torch slowed to a stop, the smoke billowing off his shoulder blades gradually dissipating. His ferocious scowl fell, replaced by a look of excruciating grief. “I just—I don’t want to be here right now,” he said. His voice began to break. “This isn’t w-where I’m supposed to be right now.”

Peter was surprised to see an emotion besides uncontrollable rage overwhelm Johnny’s expression. To his disbelief, actual tears started welling in his eyes and slipping down his cheeks. Johnny dropped against the back wall and slid to the floor, burying his face in his hands, sniffling quietly and wiping at the tears dripping off his chin. 

Peter didn’t know what he was expecting, but it definitely wasn’t this. Despite all the ways Johnny had insulted him and pissed him off, he found he couldn’t stay furious with him when he looked so broken and hurt. After a moment of hesitation, Peter traipsed across the room to stand at Johnny’s side, leaving a generous amount of space between them. He carefully sat down next to him, folding his hands in his lap as Johnny pressed the heels of his palms into his puffy eyes. Peter gave him a minute to calm down a little before speaking. 

“Is there somewhere else you’re supposed to be right now?” he asked delicately. Johnny licked his lips, voice wobbling.

“I don’t want to talk to you about this,” he said. There was no bite to his tone, though—only sadness.

“Okay,” Peter replied. He criss-crossed his legs, staring at the floor. A dead roach was curled into a ball between his feet, and he flicked it across the room. He considered his next words carefully. “I think you know by now I’m a very proficient talker. But I’m actually a really good listener, too. I never judge, and I’m great at keeping secrets. In case you were wondering.”

Johnny hugged his legs to his chest, his face blotchy and tear-stained. It was the first time Peter had looked at the fire-themed hero and seen him for what he truly was—a boy, a kid, just like him. For once, he actually looked his age, not a picture-perfect Dolce and Gabbana model. 

“You don’t have to say anything. I just thought you should know. Y’know, like—if you ever changed your mind or something.” 

“Oh my god,” Johnny groaned, dropping the back of his head against the wall. “You really never shut up, do you?”

“Nope.”

Johnny took a deep breath, running his hands under his eyes. He swallowed thickly.

“Maryland.”

Peter turned to face him, blinking in surprise. “Maryland?” he repeated back.

“Glennville, Maryland. That’s where I’m supposed to be right now.”

“Is…that where you live?” he ventured cautiously. 

“Not anymore. It’s where I grew up.” He rested his chin on his knees, eyes distant and glassy. “Me, Sue, and my…and Mom.”

Spider-Man listened quietly, his words nicking his heart. The death of Johnny Storm’s mother was a well documented aspect of his history. News anchors and tabloid writers alike were a little too eager to plaster the tragedy across every column and featurette involving Johnny’s life, sensationalizing his pain for their viewers’ consumption. It was easy to forget she was once a real woman with children she loved. Children who still missed her tremendously. 

“We’ve gone back every year since she died,” Johnny continued, anger reclaiming his voice. “Every year, except this one. We make a whole trip out of it. We spend the entire week visiting all of her favorite places. The diner, the dog park, the plant shop, the pier. Even the ice cream parlor that got turned into a bank three years ago. Sue and I made a promise that no matter where we were in life, we’d always go back to honor her. By turning the week we lost her into a week of celebrating her life.”

A fresh wave of tears streamed down his face, dripping onto his knees. His hands were trembling along with his voice.

“But now that Sue has powers and her stupid ex-boyfriend back, suddenly, she doesn’t want to go anymore. Suddenly, after becoming famous and posing for Vogue and being invited to stay with the Avengers the same week as our trip, it’s okay if we skip it this year. Why keep dwelling in the past when life is so much better now?”

He pulled his legs in closer, gripping both of his arms by the elbows, cycling shaky breaths through his lungs. His muscles were tensed, every part of him pointing inward, like he was trying to shrink into himself. Peter wanted to comfort him somehow, but thought it best to keep his distance and let him speak. 

“She’s changed so much since becoming ‘The Invisible Woman.’ She’s like a completely different person. All she cares about anymore is getting as many people to like her as possible.” He stared at the floor between his feet, narrowing his eyes. “It’s like…like she thinks we’ll both just forget how shitty our childhoods were if she can get enough people to love us. Like we can bury the past under a mountain of photo shoots and fan mail. Like if the whole world adores us, maybe it’ll fill the void that losing Mom left behind.”

The air around them felt heavy. Peter listened to Johnny in silence, a familiar ache tugging at his chest. 

“I’ve changed, too,” Johnny added. He let his legs sprawl flat across the tile, holding his palms in front of his face. “Ever since I got these powers, I’ve just felt…angrier. The smallest, stupidest things set me off. My vision goes red, and I just want to burn everything I see to the ground.” Flames flickered off his fingertips, dancing like candles on a cake. “It’s…scary. I almost killed some people yesterday while chasing down Dragon Man, but I was so caught up in my own shit, I could barely bring myself to care. I don’t think I was like this before the space mission. I got angry a lot as a kid, but Mom was always able to calm me down.” He gazed hollowly at his shivering hands, letting the tiny wisps of fire shrink until they were completely extinguished. “I d-don’t understand what’s happening to me. I’m grateful for my abilities, and I know I want to use them to help people, but…” 

He met Peter’s gaze suddenly, his expression bleak. “What if my powers are turning me evil?”

A stroke of sympathy brushed his heart. Peter turned his body towards his, scooting the teensiest bit closer to him. 

“They’re not turning you evil,” he assured him. “I promise. It’s just…all your life, you’ve wanted the power to right the wrongs done to you. Now that you have it, it can feel a bit overwhelming. Terrifying, even.” He lowered his gaze, worrying his thumbs in his lap. “When I first got my powers, someone I loved was murdered because I didn’t act when I should’ve. I went after the person who did it, and I…almost killed them. I wanted to kill them. And I very easily could’ve.”

As he spoke, Peter watched a stray tear trickle down Johnny’s face. Johnny brushed it away before it could reach his jawline. He stared at Spider-Man intently, a whisper of fear in his eyes. 

“I scared myself that day. I realized just how destructive I could be if I wanted to. These powers come with an enormous responsibility that I have to respect every time I use them. If I ever lose sight of that, I could wind up doing a lot more harm than good.”

Johnny swallowed, glancing down at his hands with a pained but thoughtful expression. Peter leaned forward and tapped Johnny’s palm with his index finger. 

“I believe superpowers enhance everything inside a person—including their emotions. And in your case, if you have a lot of righteous anger inside you, it’s going to enhance that, too.”

“It doesn’t feel righteous,” Johnny sniffled. “It feels….spiteful. Monstrous.”

“But it doesn’t have to be. You can channel that anger into protecting others from injustice. The kind of protection you deserved when you were a kid.”

Johnny considered his words for a moment, chewing his inner lip. Spider-Man shifted so he was sitting on top of his shins. 

“I remember what those first few months with powers are like. I felt the same way you did. Like everything inside me was so much louder and more intense than it used to be. I was scared I wouldn’t be able to control it. But I promise it gets easier. Every aspect of it does. The fear, the uncertainty, and the anger, too.”

The Human Torch gazed at him curiously, wiping his cheeks with his sleeves. It was nice to be able to share his experiences with another young superhero, help them feel less crazy and lost. This was probably the first time Peter had been on the “giving” side of this kind of conversation rather than the receiving one. 

“How long have you had your powers?” Johnny asked him.

Peter gazed at the ceiling in thought. “A little under two years, I think.”

“What’s been the hardest part for you to get used to?”

Spider-Man giggled. “Probably trying to juggle high school and regular life and superhero-ing all at the same time. I’ve never been good at multitasking.”

Johnny’s eyes widened, brows shooting towards his hairline. “You—you’re in high school, too?”

Peter winced internally. Should he have kept that to himself? It wasn’t common knowledge how young he actually was. But it felt right to say it. He wanted Johnny to know he wasn’t alone in his struggles. 

“Yeah,” he admitted eventually, a sheepish smile finding his lips. “I wasn’t planning on telling you this, but…we’re actually the same age.”

“Oh my god,” Johnny whispered, blinking in disbelief. “Seriously?”

“Most people don’t know that, though. Other heroes treat me differently when they figure it out, as I’m sure you’ve experienced, so I prefer to keep it under wraps.”

Johnny scoffed incredulously, struggling to process the new information. “I get that,” he said. Then he frowned. “Wait…if you’re sixteen now, how old were you when you got your powers?”

Peter scratched the back of his neck. “Okay…technically fourteen, but I turned fifteen, like, really soon after.”

Johnny gawked at him. “Holy shit,” he exclaimed. “That young?”

Spider-Man nodded. “It was definitely a major adjustment. I spent the first couple months breaking every door handle I touched and sticking to everything. Not the most heroic of beginnings.”

Johnny tilted his head to the side. “If you don’t mind me asking,” he began hesitantly, “how did you get your powers?”

Peter flexed his fingers inside his skin-tight suit. “I don’t fully understand what happened,” he admitted. “I got bit by a really weird spider, and woke up the next morning with spider-themed abilities. To this day, I still don’t know where it came from, or why it gave me superpowers.”

Johnny looked at him in a way that made Peter’s skin prickle. Like he could see his face through his mask if he stared hard enough.

“In hindsight, I probably should’ve gone to the hospital,” Peter chuckled. “I felt like I was dying. My hand swelled to the size of a softball. But I knew we could never afford an ER visit, so…”

He trailed off, drawing circles in the dust on the floor with his finger. Johnny stared at him with flicker of newfound interest in his eyes. 

“Do your parents know you’re Spider-Man? Do they, like, approve of it?”

Peter swallowed. He’d never talked about this with anyone who only knew him as Spider-Man, not Peter Parker.

“My, um…my parents died when I was really little. Plane crash. Freak accident. I barely even remember them.”

Johnny’s mouth fell open slightly. “Oh,” he said, eyes clouding over. “I’m sorry. That’s…awful.” He gazed at his feet, scrunching up his brow. “So, then…who raised you? Were you adopted by the Avengers or something?”

Peter broke into a laugh. “No, no,” he snickered. “My aunt and uncle did. They took me in and cared for me like I was their own. They’ve always been like parents to me—more so than my real ones.” He brushed his hands off on his legs. “It was only recently my aunt found out I’m Spider-Man. She was shocked at first, but she fully supports me. Sometimes to an embarrassing and patronizing degree.”

Johnny smiled softly. “She sounds nice,” he said. Peter didn’t recall ever seeing him smile in person until now. It was a good look on him. 

“Your sister took care of you after you lost your parents, right?” Peter said hesitantly.

Johnny’s smile fell as quickly as it had appeared. He turned away, scowling at the floor.

“She tried. She was only seventeen when Mom died, eighteen when my dad was put away. Still just a kid herself.” He sighed somberly. “I know she did the best she could, given the circumstances. I can’t imagine raising me was easy. But…” 

Johnny sucked his lips to his teeth, fighting to keep his voice level. “I feel like being forced to care for me has made her resent me a little bit. She had to grow up so fast and miss out on so many things ‘cuz of me, y’know? And I can’t really blame her for it.”

Peter shook his head. “From what I’ve seen, I don’t think that’s true. I think she really loves you. Every time she talks about you on the news or in interviews, she only ever says positive things.”

“Have you seen the way she talks about me when there aren’t cameras around?” he grumbled. “Ninety percent of our interactions nowadays are arguments.”

“If I’ve learned anything from Disney Channel made-for-TV movies, that’s how the majority of siblings interact.”

Johnny snorted, crossing his legs at the ankles. “I’m guessing you don’t have any?”

“No. I wish I did, though.”

“No, you don’t. They’re nagging pains in the ass who try to control everything you do and shut down everything you say. All Sue cares about is how others see us, not what either of us actually wants.”

Peter shrugged. “I think she’s just trying to protect you. If the whole world loves you, no matter what happens, you’ll always have a support system in place.” He gestured towards himself with his thumb. “Take it from a guy with no PR-savvy older sister whose rep has been raked through the mud: she’s doing you a huge favor. It makes sense why she wants you all to stay away from me; shitty reputation tends to be contagious.” 

Johnny stared off to the side, narrowing his eyes in thought. “I guess…”

“My aunt nags me, too,” Peter continued. “She seems hellbent on nitpicking every little thing I do wrong—both as Spider-Man and her nephew.” He smiled, leaning back against the wall. “But as much as it drives me crazy, I know she’s just trying to keep me safe, and push me to become the best version of myself.” 

The Human Torch huffed and rolled his eyes. “You’re annoyingly committed to seeing the good in people, you know that?”

“Mr. Stark says it’s my fatal flaw,” Spider-Man giggled. 

Johnny inhaled and exhaled slowly, drawing his legs back to his chest. He folded his arms on top of his knees, avoiding Peter’s gaze. “I’m…” he began, grimacing a little, his cheeks dusting pink. “I’m sorry I’ve been such an asshole these past few days. Sue just—she makes me so mad, and I took it out on you. She and the others always gang up on me. They tell me I’m selfish and dramatic, that I should be grateful for the chance to be here. And the thing is, I would be. On any other occasion, I would be. It’s just—why this week?” His eyes began to water again, despite his efforts to blink the tears away. “Today was supposed to be the last day of our trip, and I just…” 

The Human Torch swallowed, hiding his face behind his arms, unable to conjure the right words. Peter watched him for a moment, heart stinging in his chest, then lifted his hand and gently rested it on his shoulder. He waited for him to flinch or pull away. He didn’t.

“It’s okay,” he told him. “I understand.”

They sat in silence for a while. Peter grabbed Johnny some tissues so he could wipe his eyes and blow his nose. A few minutes passed before either of them spoke again.

“God, this is embarrassing,” Johnny groaned, burning another handful of tissues in his fist. “At this rate, I’m going to have to change my name to the Human Waterfall.”

Peter giggled, scooting the box closer to him. “I think Johnny ‘Storm’ kinda already fits the theme.”

As the waterworks ebbed once again, Spider-Man returned to his side, choosing his next words carefully.

“This trip is obviously really important to you,” he said. “Have you considered just…going by yourself? Without Sue?”

Johnny’s eyebrows furrowed together as he snatched another tissue from the box. “I guess not,” he admitted. “Neither of us have ever gone without each other. It’s always been our thing.”

“If you wanted to, I could cover for you. Your sister already hates me, so I’m fine taking the heat. Or…” He hesitated, unsure if he was crossing a line, warmth rising into his cheeks. “I could, y’know. Come with you.”

Johnny turned to look at him, blinking his grayish-blue eyes. “You…” he stuttered, gripping his knees a little tighter. “You’d really do that?”

“Of course. If you want. Not sure how we’d get there, but I’m sure we could figure something out. Maybe pull a web-swinging, fire-flying all-nighter.”

Johnny stared at him in silence a little while longer, mulling the proposal over in his mind. After a minute, he turned his gaze forward with his lips against his knees, palms clasped around his ankles. 

“Thanks,” he finally responded, voice brittle. “But, um…I can’t. It wouldn’t feel right, going without her.”

Spider-Man nodded. “I understand.”

Johnny blew his nose again and added the dirty tissues to his growing ash pile. He’d relaxed somewhat, letting his muscles unravel, and turned to Peter with a halfhearted smile.

“You were right,” Johnny decided, voice quiet.

Peter felt himself blush. “About what?” he asked.

“You are a good listener.”

The warmth in his face bled down his neck all the way into his toes. He chuckled bashfully, stretching his arms above his head. 

“Good listener, great communicator, and an ass that won’t quit. Am I the whole package or what?”

This time, Johnny burst out laughing—a boisterous, radiant sound that made Peter’s heart skip a beat. About damn time, Peter thought, mirroring his wide grin. He’d been trying to get a laugh out of him since their first encounter. It had taken longer than expected, but was well worth the wait. He vowed to do his best to hear it more often.

Spider-Man laughed along with him, the bubbly sound echoing back at them off the walls. It was a moment of shared bliss that felt rejuvenating and silly and right. Peter could’ve stayed suspended in it for a lot longer than it actually lasted.

As their giggles tapered off, Peter gave Johnny a playful nudge. “Can we start over?” he asked earnestly. “When I heard you and your team were coming to visit Avengers Tower, I was so excited. Like, embarrassingly excited. I thought, ‘Wow! Finally! Another teenage superhero for me to bond with and confide in.’ As fun as it is hanging out with the Avengers, they’re all just so old.”

Johnny snickered. “True. I’m sorry I was so hostile towards you. You didn’t deserve it.” He smiled shyly at his feet. “Thanks for giving me a second chance. It’s nice to know I’m not the only superhero out here reppin’ Gen Z amongst all these goddamn grandpas.”

Spider-Man snorted. “For real. If I have to explain what TikTok is one more time…”

Johnny bumped his shoulder against Peter’s, making him look up in surprise. “You know, you’re a lot different than I imagined, Spidey.”

Peter cracked a smile. “How so?”

“I mean—there’s so much negative gossip out there about you. I thought you’d be some creepy, cynical recluse who drank bug juice and lived in a cave or something. But you’re actually really nice. Obnoxiously chatty and optimistic, but nice.”

Peter chuckled, scratching the back of his head. “Um, thank you? I think?”

“Thanks for letting me rant to you for a bit,” Johnny said quietly, poking at the pile of ash between them. “I…think I really needed it.”

Spider-Man nodded, voice softening. “Of course,” he replied. “Anytime.”

Johnny gazed around the locker room, a wrinkle forming between his eyebrows. “So…are we, like, trapped in here? Or is there another way we can get out?”

Peter stared ahead and blinked. “Oh. Right. Good question.” He stood and walked to the door at the end of the row of lockers. It was still shut, but a red button on the wall beside it was flashing. Puzzled, Peter clicked it with his thumb.

“Hello? Can we get out now, please?”

“Mr. Stark instructed me not to let either of you out until you both had calmed down,” FRIDAY answered from the speaker. “Unless you began trying to kill each other again. Are you done trying to kill each other?”

“Yes, FRIDAY,” Spider-Man deadpanned, rolling his eyes.

“Spectacular,” she said. A second later, the door clunked open, blessing Peter with the gift of non-gym-socky air.

“Freedom!” Peter called to Johnny. The Human Torch hopped to his feet and followed him out of the locker room. They stepped back into the wide arena, which was now empty.

“Both of our teams just left us in there?” Johnny scoffed. “Rude.”

A loud jingle chimed from Peter’s phone. He pulled it out of his pocket and stared at the screen. FEED MARSHMALLOW, the reminder stated, typed out in all caps. Whoops, Peter thought, shutting off the alarm. He was pet sitting for a neighbor in their complex who’d gone with May to the conference. He needed to swing by the apartment and give Marshmallow the cat her dinner. And also maybe water the plants he’d promised May he would keep alive.

“Is that the mayor? You gotta spring into action?” Johnny joked.

Peter glanced up from the screen. “Huh? Oh, heh, no.” He stuffed his phone back in his pocket. “I’m, uh, cat sitting. And plant sitting. And doing a terrible job at both. I gotta run.”

Johnny giggled. “Spider-Man—cat sitting? How come you never see stories like that making headlines?”

Peter laughed and shrugged. “No one wants to hear about that kind of stuff. Even if they did, Jonah would find a way to spin it into some crazy conspiracy theory about Spider-Man eating kittens to satisfy his bloodlust or some shit.”

“Jesus,” Johnny said, grimacing. “That guy seriously sucks.”

“Yeah. I try not to let it bother me.” Peter took a step towards him, changing his tone. “So, um, are you good? Or better, at least?” He gripped his forearm uneasily. “I’m…really sorry about your mom. I can’t imagine how hard this week has been for you. If there’s anything I can do to help—”

“I’m okay,” Johnny assured him. He looked towards the stairs, a somber smile lifting the corners of his lips. “I think I’ll spend the evening visiting my mom’s favorite spots in New York. She brought me here a lot as a kid, so I remember most of them.”

Peter smiled and gave a small nod. “That sounds like a great idea.”

Exhaling slowly, Johnny lit himself on fire and lifted off the ground. “Thanks for the pep talk, Spidey,” he said, throwing Peter a flirty wink. “See yah around, yeah?” Then he flew past him and zipped up the winding stairwell, disappearing in a rush of cinder and flame.

Dude knows how to exit in style, that’s for sure, Spider-Man thought, watching the smoke slowly dissipate into nothing. He was happy they had cleared the air between them, and perhaps paved the way for a potential friendship. Johnny seemed like a nice person he’d just happened to catch on the worst possible week. Now that they’d talked through the conflict and learned more about one another, Peter anticipated their future interactions to be far more congenial. 

So why did being around him still make him so nervous?

Was it because he was famous? Not likely. Peter interacted with famous people all the time. And although his encounters with them often left him starstruck, this felt different.

Maybe he was…jealous? That had been his initial theory, and it made sense; Johnny was insanely attractive. He had that effortlessly voluminous hair and a sculpture-like bone structure paired with those dark, magnetizing eyes…

Why else would he be paying so much attention to his features and feeling this way? 

Spider-Man shook his head and trotted down the stairs. Envy is not a good color on you, Pete, he scolded himself. Makes your brain act all wonky. Best to just push it aside and focus on earning Johnny’s friendship. You don’t want to let whatever this is ruin your chances of being friends with him, do you?

Jealousy. That was all this was. Absolutely nothing to worry about. He could get over these ridiculous emotions for the sake of their friendship. Easy-peasy.

[mccall-me-maurice]

A new list of headcanons for the updated AU

Lotf headcanons

Jack:

Jack is Ralph’s academic rival and also head of the debate team. He spends the weekends at his father’s business, learning how to run the company. On the Saturday nights, he goes to an underground club in a fight ring thing. Nobody knows he does it, even though Ralph also spends time there.

Jack is dyslexic and has minor and manageable OCD, denying using extra help for his dyslexia in classes.

Comes from a wealthy family with 6 siblings, his father divorcing his mother and marrying his step-mother who he pushes away because he’s angsty and shes “not his real mother.”

Loves 80s music so much, he’s a nerd for it.

Sings in the shower/bathroom like into a hairbrush in front of the mirror in his little towel like a nerd but he’s actually really good at singing.

Wears his uniform extremely sharply and very crisp like why so much effort.

He has hearing loss due to an accident in his childhood and he’s fluent in ASL, but doesn’t wear his hearing aids almost ever.

Ralph:

Ralph is fluent in violin, he’s actually really good at playing, he was also an ocean lifeguard and saved Jack’s life when he got caught in a current.

He wears thick framed glasses to read and has really swoopy handwriting thats illegible because it’s like messy calligraphy.

Ralph dives as a hobby and is so good at it, like scary good at diving perfectly.

He has beauty marks on his face that he lets people trace sometimes, ink usually adorning his cheeks.

Very French, extremely French. Fluent in the language.

Draws on his hands with different coloured pens and the designs are always so intricate like a mandala colouring book.

Also draws on the cuffs of his jeans and the rubber edge of his sneakers all the time.

Blushes very easily, will go red in a matter of seconds flat either when he’s flustered, embarrassed or angry.

Brothers with Robert.

Simon:

Spends all of his out of school time in his mother’s flower shop and can recite the meaning of most flowers if you ask him. His fingers are all bandaged up because of how much he cuts himself with knives when he’s removing stems or clippers.

He has epilepsy and faints frequently.

Is a fan of older musicals, like Grease, Dirty Dancing and Hairspray and makes the choir watch them with him.

Rarely spends time indoors, Simon is usually out biking around the neighbourhood or walking around with his friends from school.

Will paint rocks and gift them to people when he thinks they’re upset. Also does face painting at the school carnivals, because he never minds being alone in a booth when there is nobody there.

Speaks softly and is usually ignored in favour of people with louder opinions, but he’s usually right.

Roger:

His biological family died in a house accident, the only thing surviving being him and his cat Nastya, who he loves more than anything. Because of his parents death, he taught himself the rest of the Russian language, which they were already teaching him along with English. However, his heritage is East Asian and Russian.

He pierced his lip by himself, and even though it turned out fine, he got his ears done professionally.

Not very affectionate and will push people away, distancing himself because he doesn’t like the idea of anyone being close to him and get under his skin.

Dyed the back part of his hair on a whim and just liked it enough to keep it as a style.

Spends nights at Simon’s place instead of his own, finding more comfort in Simon’s house.

Sam:

Comes from a German family, but knows German, Italian and English.

He hates birthdays because he doesn’t understand why they are so important.

Hates social interactions and actively avoids them with a passion. He gets extremely nervous and just leaves abruptly when he gets too overwhelmed.

Younger than Eric by 6 minutes, which he routinely gets teased for.

Into super cheesy romantic movies because he loves the idea of a happy ending despite not having one himself.

Messes with his hair when he’s anxious, so it’s constantly messy and mussed.

Mega nail biter when he’s nervous.

Cousins with Jack.

Maurice:

Heavily touch reliant and when his friends don’t show him physical affection, he assumes the worst and gets very upset.

Heavily Italian, like so fucking Italian. His family hardly speaks English and he learned most of his from school.

Very passionate about science despite most people thinking he’s an idiot. He has some of the highest marks in his class.

Messes with things when he’s talking or uses hand gestures. Like if there’s a pen, he’s clicking it because it helps him concentrate.

Maurice has like a billion flannels and hoodies he just cycles through and it looks like he doesn’t change but no, it’s just that he owns a gazillion grey hoodies

His older sister when to an Ivy League school, so he owns a lot of stuff from it that he wears like sweaters or ball caps.

Eric:

Very sarcastic. his entire sense of humour is him bathing in his own sarcasm. It’s actually pretty well timed and kind of funny how he’s able to deadpan his jokes.

Very easily picks up on languages. He’s fluent or close to fluent in German, English, Italian, French, Spanish, Japanese and partly fluent in Korean.

Really enjoys computer science and plans on doing it for a living. He stays up late at night to work and sleeps until like midday.

Doesn’t acknowledge other people’s emotions very often because he doesn’t realise when he’s gone too far, but still feels bad for others when they’re hurt.

Jack’s favourite cousin because they’re cynical buddies. Jack is overly protective of him even though Eric is perfectly capable.

Robert:

Brothers with Ralph and is very protective over him. Has absolutely slandered choir members before for hating on Ralph.

Shares a dad with Ralph but has a different mom, who he visits over the summer and sometimes during the holidays. That’s where he gets his Spanish roots from, which is a language he’s fluent in. He has 7 siblings on that side of his family.

Adores burnt popcorn and burnt anything. If he can burn it, he will.

Works as a mechanic in his free time and built the car he shares with Ralph.

Sci-Fi nerd, specifically Star Wars. He loves the movies and watches them like every day.

Extremely talented artist, Robert sketches anytime he has a pencil and paper.

Peter:

Was bullied in the past but doesn’t let the words bother him anymore. It mostly stopped around high school.

Works with his auntie in the sweet shop and brings his friends food for them to taste test.

Used to be a boy scout, so he can tie any knot you want him to, it’s really a gift.

Gets very cold very easily, especially his fingertips. He usually has a pair of gloves on him for when it gets really bad.

A Mathlete for most of his time in high school, obviously is extremely intelligent.

Double knots his shoelaces so they’re extra secure.

Bill:

Swedish, and really enjoys his own culture. He will spend HOURS rambling about it and how much he loves it.

Watches Avatar the Last Airbender and has the biggest crushes on Sokka and Zuko.

Also is a sucker for people who wear glasses, he really loves them.

Works at the library despite not liking books, he finds comfort in shelving them and the order they go in.

Puts little umbrellas in every single drink he has, it doesn’t matter what it is.

Writes notes to himself on sticky notes because his memory is horrible.

Sets at least 5 alarms because 1 will not wake him up by itself.

Harold:

Can speak limited Spanish due to his schooling.

Likes singing, but never really got into it like some choir members because he has stage fright.

Powerful speaker when he wants to be, but is usually too nervous to say anything.

Has no idea how to tie a tie, so he lets other people do it for him.

Sometimes take sarcastic comments seriously and ends up confused.

A really good actor and loves the performing arts.

Has extremely clear skin, he never gets any blemishes.

Wilfred:

Dyed his hair because his naturally brown hair reminds him too much of his father, who he hates.

Has 4 tattoos in total, the 4 card suits on his cheek, a half sleeve of roses, a bow and olive branch on his inner forearm, and the solar system on his outer forearm.

Very flirtatious to people he doesn’t really like but gets nervous around those he does.

Hold grudges really well.

Has shockingly neat handwriting.

Has a pretty horrible home life but he never talks about it to anyone because he doesn’t want to be perceived as weak or incapable.

Colours with only crayons.

Percival:

Cries easily, as he’s very emotionally driven and is typically teased for being a crybaby or told to “toughen up.”

Absolutely has the worst sleep schedule ever, he gets 3 hours and calls it a win.

Can’t sleep without a nightlight on in his room.

Enjoys writing things down in this notebook instead of on his phone because he likes the feeling of physically using pen and paper.

Sends letters to people all the time instead of messaging.

Good at sewing, he makes his own Halloween costume every year by himself.

Hates horror movies because he’s spooked easily.

Max:

Lived through a house fire when he was younger, so he has burn scars all over his arms.

Is afraid of cooking due to the fire and will go without eating if he has to touch the stove to make food.

Laid back most of the time, but can reach a snapping point in which the emotion is amplified. (like sadness or anger)

Loves swimming, it doesn’t matter where he does it, he just loves to swim.

Is very time sensitive and has to get places early or directly on time or else he gets anxious.

A very fast reader, typically long books take him 2-3 days to get through.

Johnny:

Worries a lot, he usually sees the worst in every single situation.

Is a trans male (Ftm) and was accepted by his entire family when he came out.

Owns a St. Bernard named Dolly who is the sweetest dog ever.

Spends a lot of time outdoors, he still plays as if he is a child.

Also enjoys the snow a lot because he’s fond of building snowmen with the kids on his street.

Has very sensitive skin and eczema, which he doesn’t like to talk about or show anyone because it makes him feel insecure.

Oddly good at playing guitar, he just picks up on chords with ease.

Walter:

Good at playing the drums and annoys his entire family with it.

Uses a skateboard as his main method of transportation around places.

On the basketball team, as his older brother taught him to play when they were both younger.

Hates roller skating despite being very good at most things on wheels. He can never find his balance.

Shockingly good at Math, especially statistics and calculus. He’s in all advanced math courses.

Has a very weird snake addiction and he desperately wants to buy one.

Henry:

Aromantic Asexual who is best friends with Harold and Wilfred.

Mainly makes snippy remarks because his humour falls into the sarcasm umbrella.

Adores comic books and superheroes, specifically Marvel ones because he’s a fan of Dare Devil.

Plays baseball in his free time but hasn’t joined a team, he just plays with the boys in his neighbourhood.

Addicted to the High School Musical movies.

Good at painting people’s nails and will do it for them if they ask.

Has really fluffy hair that he lets people touch and play with.

[deniigi]

MORE POLYCULE SHIT

here this is mostly Sam/Ned from Matt’s POV. (this piece assumes Matt didn’t know about the negotiations until later)

Title: soda bottles

Summary: Matt finds out about Sam’s involvement with Ned and then with Peter’s polycule. He tries to talk to Sam about it, but fails. On like, every front.

---------------

The apprentice told him to stay out of his room and his life and his business and he should have known better by now, truly.

Matt knew that voice. And he also knew that what Sam, Samuel, Sammy-my-darling was doing right now at this present moment was giggling.

Unacceptable. There would be no joy in this house.

Matt removed himself from the door and declared war in silence.

 ---

 The dogs were instrumental in luring Samuel out to open space. And by luring, Matt meant knocking on his bedroom door with leashes in hand and asking Sam if he wanted a walk.

In no time Matt had zero leashes and zero dogs and, while he was at it, zero apprentices.

In fact, he had been abandoned.

In his own house.

Again.

How did this keep happening?

 ---

 Foggy told Matt to let Sam have his little crush on Ned. Ned was a good boy. Foggy had maintained this for years. He skirted around the fact that he’d grabbed Ned’s shoulders when he was 17 and had told him to stare him in the eyes and to never fall in love with his best friend.

Matt pointed this out to him and got a pillow to the face, then a huff and an uncalled-for reminder that he was a fucking idiot and no one loved him.

This was Foggy’s love language though, so Matt didn’t take it to heart. Instead, he abandoned him for the only person in the world who truly understood him.

Jenn.

 ---

  Jenn had to spend fifteen minutes cooing over the fact that Matt had acquired an apprentice and then she had to spend another ten being an asshole about it and then she spent a solid 5 making dad jokes at him when he tried to talk and so he waited until she was done with her cackling and personal jabs.

She told him that it was cute that Peter’s bestie was gushing over Matt’s apprentice.

She told him that he should be happy for them.

And Matt was. Happy for them, that is.

He was thrilled.

Sam’s track record with long-term partners, as far as Matt could tell, was a solid nil for nil. The boy refused to be attached to anyone, which Matt totally got.

But it was like standing by, watching your own young moronic self making a series of unfortunate decisions that were not only whole unnecessary, but also had solutions within easy reach, like headstones in a damn cemetery.

Sam had a string of guys and girls that he’d picked up at clubs and bars and fuckin’ hipster literature readings downtown who were literally, actually falling over themselves to be with him. And he texted them and laughed about them and joked with Leilani and Achara about them, and then never spoke of them ever again.

Matt got it, okay?

He’d been that guy.

Maybe a little more on the jock side of things and maybe a little less, say, refined than Sammy—but he still got it. A slightly longer relationship was good for Sam. And Ned was a good egg—no, a great egg.

But he just couldn’t shake this feeling, Jenn.

He didn’t even know what it was, but it made him paranoid and want Sam to go back to the self-destructive nonsense, because at least Matt knew what that felt like. He could push back against that after dumping the kid out of the ring in training.

“Matty,” Jenn said affectionately, “You’re trying to protect Sam, Ned, and Peter. But you don’t have to do that. They’re all grown. Let them make their decisions.”

Ooooohohoho

How dare she.

Matt knew they were grown. Sam was nearly 25. Peter was almost 27—oh god, Peter was almost 27. FUCK. Jesus. Lord. Someone—Christ.

Sammy was a baby.

He couldn’t be playing with these big kids, he’d have his heart broken.

What if Ned got bored of him, Jenn??

Matt couldn’t beat the shit out of Ned. Ned was a good boy. And Peter would lose his damn gourd and that was how Matt would end up under two tons of concrete and rebar with an angry spider perched on top, stomping and spitting.

“Matt,” Jenn said soothingly. “Peter learned how to be polyamorous from you, dear heart.”

Oh shit.

Oh right.

Oh no.

“I’ve gotta go,” Matt said. “Lovely talking to you, next time you’re in town, come around for a foursome or a twosome or a three if Kirsten’s down—okay BYE.”

Jenn laughed at him when he hung up.

Matt clutched at his chest.

 ---

 He’d inadvertently taught Peter what polyamory looked like by flinging himself down on many disgusting surfaces and moaning and writhing in agony and despair about Foggy being monogamous and everyone in the world being unspeakably brilliant and strong and no-doubt gorgeous.

Fuckin’ Kirsten.

Fuckin’ Wade.

Fuckin’ Karen.

And Heather and Marci and ONE TIME ONLY Frank.

UGH.

Disgusting. Matt needed Lysol to scrub that moment of weakness from his brain.

The point was that he’d been a chump, and baby Peter had observed these various moaning sessions and had apparently, at some point, started taking notes.

Gah.

Peter. Why?

Stop loving your friends. Stop copying me. Get your own breakdown material.

Uuuuuuugh.

Okay, okay. Rally, Murdock. It’s fine.

This is simply a conversation to have with Sammy about how to negotiate such--hng. Actually maybe this was a Kirsten conversation.

 ---

 He went to visit Kirsten.

He got a little distracted because Kirsten was Kirsten and she required thorough smelling and like, minimum two kisses and she deserved to have at his bare chest if she wanted it—who was he to deny her—THE POINT.

The point. Was.

That he told Kirsten about things and she told him not to talk about work when she was taking her shirt off, and he told her to leave it on for just like, five minutes longer and that came out wrong and she was insulted and Matt had to backtrack for half an hour.

But he got there in the end, alright?

Kirsten said she didn’t know that Sam was polyamorous.

Matt said that he didn’t know if he was, but he sure as shit was flirting with Ned like, constantly.

Kirsten said that that explained why Sam kept telling her that he couldn’t come to dinner with them because he already had a date. Kirsten then went rigid and said, “Wait, you mean Ned-Ned?”

Yes.

Yes, Matt did.

“Oh.”

Correct reaction.

“Is that—do you think that’s –hm.”

Correct reaction maintained and appreciated. Matt no longer felt like a monumental ass.

“That might be a little, uh, cuttin’ it close there,” Kirsten said. “Does Peter know?”

Presumably. Ned couldn’t lie for shit.

“Maybe we should ask Peter what the negotiations there are. He’s pretty on top of that stuff.”

Shockingly, that was true.

Good plan.

“If Sammy’s gonna get involved with them, then he should at least know what he’s getting into,” Kirsten said.

Yes, but also—why is this feeling happening, Kirsten, beloved life partner number 2?

“Oh, that? That’s called ‘you’re a territorial dick,’” Kirsten said. “Get over yourself.”

“But he’s 24,” Matt said. “A child.”

“He’ll be twenty-five in a few months, Matthew,” Kirsten said. “That’s bad-decision-making prime-time. This is inevitable. My concern is that he’s not going into a relationship with Ned, thinking that he’s the primary partner there.”

Okay, fair.

“Are we done with this conversation now?”

Yes.

“Thank god. I hate your dad impulses. Cleanse yourself of them and get on the bed.”

Would do.

 ---

 Kirsten made Matt call Peter and be awkward for the both of them which, Matt would like it stated for the record, was extremely unfair and manipulative of her.

Peter told him that Sam was fine.

Peter told him that he and Sam had maybe fooled around a little bit without Matt and Foggy and Kirsten’s knowledge which was. Hm.

Troublemakers. Stop laughing, Franklin. This is nothing like the time we inducted Kirsten into our life and lied about it to everyone we knew for 3 years.

Nothing.

Peter thought not. Peter thought that Sam had told Matt about this whole thing. He then got a little huffy and said that Ned was the one who had swept Sam off his feet while Peter had been standing right there, man. As Spiderman. Primed for feet-sweeping.

That was satisfying.

Peter took the next ten minutes to complain about how Sam didn’t want to talk to him as much as he wanted to talk to Ned and how Ned was always begging off dinners with Peter and MJ to go have dinner with Sam and how Peter and MJ had to make do with Johnny in his absence.

Matt would never understand why Peter pretended that he and Johnny Storm were nothing more than fuck buddies, but okay, sure. If that’s what helps you sleep at night, little lion man.

Peter went on to say that the worst part of Sam and Ned’s mutual obsession was how fucking cute it was.

Disgusting, Peter maintained.

There were matching bracelets and drawn out decisions about matching sneakers. And there was nattering on until past midnight about Transformers lore and there was non-stop texting and complaints about various tools and coding languages and all this shit that Peter’s own flavor of nerd had diverged from about six years ago.

Kirsten made a little squeak that told Matt that she was highly entertained by Peter’s ‘complaints.’

It sounded more to Matt like Peter and MJ were hunkered down behind the couch, narrating all Ned’s behavior to Johnny (the totally uninvolved fuckbuddy) in whispers.  

Foggy curled up on the edge of their own couch to muffle his wheezy giggles.

Exhausting.

The youth were exhausting. How had no one just shot Matt straight through the heart at 27?

“I will speak to Sam about emotional repression,” he promised Peter only to receive a “NO WAIT” from both him and, from the sound of it, MJ and (only fuckbuddy) Johnny a little ways away.

Peter hurriedly explained that Sammy was really shy and skittish about being around their polycule and had just connected with Ned as the least threatening member and it had taken ages, so please don’t say anything and destroy all of the rest of their hard work.

This hit a strange note.

Foggy and Kirsten weren’t snickering anymore either.

Sam?

Wasn’t?

Shy?

Like, if anything, Sammy was shameless. Always lying in people’s laps and snatching their open hands to swing back and forth.

Sure, he was teasing. But shy? Shy?

Sam was sick.

“No,” Peter said. “Double D, he’s not sick.”

Very sick. Terminally ill.

“DD. He’s not sick.”

Bullshit. Matt was taking him to the doctor. Too bad, Sam. You couldn’t avoid it forever.

“Matt. He’s just. Emotionally. Repressed. You should recognize it because its your whole way of being.”

Wow, hadn’t this conversation been going on for a while now? Time to go.

“MATT. Leave him alone,” Peter said. “I’m looking after him, okay? Chill.”

Chill. Yes. Okay, fine. Matt would chill.

For now. Goodbye, Peter.

 ---

 Matt hadn’t chilled about anything in his life and he didn’t intend to start now. So instead he confronted the apprentice.

The apprentice leaned very hard against his door and told Matt that he would rather die than speak of such things, so Matt told him to bare his neck.

Sammy was convinced. But only just.

He made himself frighteningly small and grumpy on his bed and allowed Matt to sit only on the last four inches of it. Matt kind of wanted to take the opportunity to teach him how to hiss.

But alas. That was a skill for another time.

“I talked to Peter,” he said.

Sam mumbled.

“He says you’re shy. Are you feeling okay?”

Sam mumbled in a more prolonged, growly kind of way. He was muffled by something. Probably jeans. Or sweats. Hard to tell.

“Why are you being shy? We both know you’re not shy. Ned’s a nice boy,” Matt told him. “You can trust him.”

Sam jerked his body in some way strongly enough to make the bed shake.

Matt sighed.

“Sam,” he said.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Sam said.

“Listen, kid,” Matt said. “You’re gonna do what you want. You’re grown, those are your decisions to make. But if you’re ever uncomfortable or you want to spend time with one person in particular, you’ve gotta communicate that to the others. I know that’s not like, smoothly done or whatever. But it’s what you’ve gotta do in these kinds of relationships.”

Sam made an unhappy sound.

“I don’t want a relationship,” he said quietly.

Ehn.

Same, pal.

They’re a lot of work.

“They’re worth it,” Matt promised him. “And it’s okay to be a little in love, you know. I’m in love every day. It’s not shameful. You don’t have to hide it.”

Sam huffed.

“People’ll stare,” he finally said. “If we ever went out. People would stare.”

Ahhh.

“That’s what you think,” Matt said. “But then you go and do it and it turns out that no one actually cares. People are very self-centered, Sam. You spend all this time worrying about how others perceive you and, at the end of the day, 90% of people literally don’t care. You don’t have to talk to Ned in your room all the time.”

Sam did something with his body that concentrated it even further into a dense mass.

“I like him,” he admitted. “He’s nice.”

Matt hummed.

“He’s a peaceful person,” he said.

“He talks so I don’t have to,” Sam said.

Aw.

Matt felt across the bed and eventually found Sam’s cheek to pinch.

“So shy for such a loudmouth,” he teased.

Sam bit his hand. Matt snickered.

“It’s okay, when I met Fogs I was shy, too,” he said.

Sam grumbled.

“It’s true,” Matt said. “Could not fathom having another human around who I didn’t have to put on an act for.”

He waited.

Sam didn’t even seem to realize that his heart was slowing down.

“I don’t like talking all the time,” he said after a long few beats.

Matt ruffled his hair.

“Ned knows a lot about Star Wars,” he said.

“And computers,” Sam added.

“And code,” Matt said.

Sam’s foot shook a little. Matt schooled his face. Sam crunched into a tighter ball.

Adorable.

Matt got up.

“Long distance is rough,” he said. “Maybe you guys can watch a movie together.”

Sam made a disgruntled sound. Matt left him to be miserable.

 ---

 “You’ve sure turned your opinion around.”

Yes, Husband. Matt had indeed. But that was because Sam was clearly and obviously suffering as a result of this crush, which was precisely where Matt needed him to be.

Misery was familiar. Resentment was nearly as good as spite in terms of skill development.

Dopey-ness was asking for trouble.

“Matt, you cannot be serious.”

Oh, but he could.

“Matthew, what did you tell that boy?”

Nothing he didn’t need to know.

Foggy abandoned him at the table. Matt sipped his coffee. It tasted oh-so-sweet.

 ---

 Things did not change until Matt got a text from Peter that said simply ‘when the fuck is Sam’s birthday?’

In February. Why was he asking?

Peter said ‘damn. Okay, thanks.’

Peter then said that he’d seemed a little sad lately and Ned was freaking out about it and fixating, so they were collectively looking for an excuse to cheer Sam up a little.

Oh, Matt realized. No, that wasn’t sad.

The night nurse had given Sammy the good drugs after last week. He was high as a kite, bless him. Kept running into walls and shit. Matt had dragged him up out of the dog beds twice now.

He informed Peter of the damaged elbow and got nothing but keyboard smashes in return.

This was followed by Sam stumbling out of his room and half up the stairs to make pitiful sounds when he couldn’t make them stay still long enough to climb the rest of them. Foggy shook his head and told Matt to go “strap that kid to the bed, for god’s sake. He’s gonna tear more stitches. And go text for him before he drops his phone again.”

Sammy was coming along great.

He held his phone out to Matt when Matt came down to stand over him on the stairs.

“They’re yellin’,” he slurred.

Yeah, Matt figured.

“Bed,” he said.

“It’s too hot,” Sam said.

No, pathetic ball of humanity. That was the fever, bud.

“Open the window,” Matt said.

“I have a window?”

Bless.

“Up you go,” Matt said.

“DON’T TOUCH ME. Nooooo. Teach, noooooo.”

 ---

 MM: Peter stop texting him. he can’t read his texts rn. Zero tolerance for opioids.

PP: for WHAT

MM: he’s fine. lightly stabbed. Fractured elbow.

MJ: MATT

MM: yes?

MJ: tell him to get better for us

NL: ;__; please?

MM: he will be fine. He’s supposed to be sleeping this off.  

MJ: can you keep us updated?

MM: why

PP: he’s our partner?

MM: ?

MM: I thought he was Ned’s main

NL: AJDF:AKSDFJASDFa

NL: DOES HE TALK ABOUT ME??

MJ: dude

NL: my b my b sry sry

NL: does he talk about me DD?

MM: no

NL: cool cool cool that’s fine

PP: ned

NL: it’s casual that’s cool

MJ: oh my god

NL: it doesn’t mean anything. That makes sense.

MM: peter what is happening?

PP: ned has decided that no texting means that sam hates him and no longer wants to be part of our relationship

NL: TELL HIM IM SORRY

PP: remember how you told me I have rejection issues?

MM: Ned he’s fine. He’s not mad. He’s high.

NL: [pikawat.png]

MJ: *coughs*

NL: oh shit my bad. I mean.

NL: what do you mean?

MM: I mean he likes you. He just hates talking about weaknesses. Ergo he hates talking about you.

MJ: ah, yes. I see now. The superhero logic. The forest has reappeared before me.

NL: OWO

MM: what does this mean?

PP: it’s a face. Like a super interested cat

NL: shut up

NL: so he likes me back?

MJ: no

PP: no

MM: I presume so? I don’t know kid. I just said he doesn’t talk about it.

NL: DD I will pay you in computer repairs to find out for me

MM: to find out if Sam likes you??

NL: yes

MM: what part of his obsession is confusing you

MJ: ASHDAF:SDF

PP: harsh

NL: all of it.

NL: okay so here’s the thing. We got like, matchy matchy stuff, right? Cause that’s what couples do. But he never wears his?? And like, we’ve been playing these games online, like, trying to beat each other, but he just stops playing halfway through? And if we’re watching a movie, it’s fine for the first half, but then he gets quiet and I just end up nattering away about nothing for like an hour and I can’t read the silence DD. I can’t read it. And Peter’s a liar

PP: okay no it is WELL established that I can’t lie what are you even talking about

NL: and he keeps going on about how sam’s shy, but he’s NOT shy. And we were fine until this week, but like, obviously, he’s high and not reading his messages and stuff, but idk am I making this into a big deal? From your end?

MM: What was that face, Peter?

PP: OwO

MM: OwO

MJ: ASDFAeirwieawewdflajwe

MJ: NED LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE TO THE OLD MAN

NL: SHUT UP. DD, please. Help me. Should I apologize? Is he bored of me? Does he want more time with Peter?

PP: what

PP: no pal I’m just a piece of ass in this situ

MJ: as you should be

PP: awwww

MM: ned Sammy’s fine?

NL:  omg ‘sammy’ that’s really cute do you think he’d mind if I called him that? You know. If he ever speaks to me again?

PP: DD just tell him everything is fine so we can all go to sleep without being woken up every 20 min for a crisis.

MM: I literally don’t know. He doesn’t talk about any of you.

NL: can you sneaky-ninja ask him?

  Matt could not with these children. Sam’s heartbeat was evening out. He was nearly back to sleep. Matt’s back couldn’t take hauling him up off the stairs in another half an hour, so he was going to stay right where he was, that was for damn sure.

“Samuel, you are dating three different flavors of spazz,” he told him.

Sam wriggled over and snuffled into his duvet.

Matt decided that that was an affirmative.

  MM: he says you’re all dramatic and to leave him alone to sleep.

NL: ;__;

PP: ned that is not rejection

NL: ok

MJ: this is embarrassing

NL: I’m just gonna crawl under the floorboards and waste away👍

PP: for fuck’s sake this is me-levels of drama

NL: DD can you tell him that if he’s ever down to just watch shit as friends that’s okay too?

MJ: NED. Matt’s literally out of this loop. And Sam’s probably unconscious.

MM: can confirm is now unconscious. I am exiting your drama.

PP: Dude remember when I said I was gonna drown myself in the sea? You are reaching those levels

NL: I JUST LOVE HIM

  Oh, aw.

  NL: And it’s okay if he doesn’t feel the same way, that’s okay, I just wanted to make sure he wasn’t like uncomfortable. I can text him less and let him do his work things and we don’t have to organize shit on the weekends. It’s totally fine

  These fuckin’ kids.

Matt grabbed Sam before he cracked his head against the wall and felt around for something to put between his forehead and it.

He fumbled out his phone in the meantime.

“Samuel,” he said into it, “When you wake up, come upstairs before taking the next pill.”

 ---

 Sam was in pain and grumpy as shit and his mood did not improve as he read through Matt’s messages.

“Two days and everyone loses their goddamn minds,” he said.

Pretty much.

“Ned loves you,” Matt teased.

“Ned needs one of those happy pills,” Sam deadpanned.

Hm. How about no?

Sam groaned and carefully melded himself to the table.

“Why don’t you wear the matchy-matchy stuff?” Matt asked, setting a bag of icy water on Sam’s shoulders. He made a soft sound of relief.

“I don’t want to get ‘em dirty,” Sam hummed.

Hm.

“Maybe if you wore them out a little bit, Ned would like that,” Matt offered.

Sam mulled this over.

“Nah,” he said. “I’ll just tell him I wear it to sleep.”

Matt was so proud.

He missed Foggy coming in halfway through that discussion.

He did not miss the lecture Foggy laid on both of them about lying to loved ones.

 ---

 Matt decided that Sam was far, far more emotionally repressed than he’d given the kid credit for. He was tickled pink.

Kirsten and Foggy were not. They called this ‘concerning behavior’ that needed ‘to be monitored in case of hidden injuries and self-harm.’

And like, man, it was as if they’d hard experience with this shit or something.

Matt decided to bypass their waffling and cornered Sam by trapping him in his duvet and demanding to know if he was hiding any injuries or self-harm.

Sam told him to get out of his room. His heartbeat did not react to the accusations, but rather to Matt’s ‘giant, heavy, albatross body’ assaulting him in his safe place.

Matt decided that this was proof that the emotional repression was, as he had always argued, doing exactly what it needed to: making Sam three times more functional as a human being.

Foggy took from that explanation that Matt was lying to him again.

Which, like, obviously.

But did Foggy need to know any of that?

Fuck no.

Only happy times with Matt Murdock here.

Smiling was somehow the wrong answer.

Smiling resulted in yelling. And then lots of loud heartbeats. And then something that looked a little like a fight, probably, to people with working eyes. But Matt knew that it wasn’t that.

It was just Foggy being hurt that Matt couldn’t tell him that Foggy’s homesickness was digging holes in his own resolve and mental wellbeing.

Sam popped up when Foggy went to go lay down to calm down and asked if everything was okay.

Matt told him it was.

Sam’s heart was not convinced. It started beating faster somehow.

Matt fully anticipated the texts that arrived later that night.

 ---

 PP: yo DD, you guys okay?

MM: why

PP: ‘cause Sam’s freaking out saying that you and Foggy were shouting again?

MM: ah

MM: no we’re okay. No biggie

PP: I smell bullshit

MM: carry on smelling then

PP: Matt do you ever think about how you’re like, an example to us all of how not to live?

MM: beg your pardon?

PP: I just mean like, you do shit and we all learn from your shit. Like, every day.

MM: ?

PP: Sam like dumped a pile of lies he’d been telling Ned in his lap and started crying for like half an hour and apologized for another 40 minutes and then hung up and won’t answer his phone.

MM: what was that face again? The cat one?

PP: OwO

MM: OwO

PP: lol

 ---

 The apprentice was perhaps absorbing too much too fast. He flat out denied having had any emotional crisis.

His heart was dead even when he said it. He was getting too good at out-maneuvering that trick.

“Peter seems to think that you had one the other night,” Matt mused.

“Peter needs to mind his own business,” Sam sniffed.

Aha.

“You like Peter,” Matt pointed out.

“He’s fine,” Sam said.

“Fine or fine?”

“That’s nasty, Teach. Don’t be gross. That’s like your little brother.”

Oh, sure it was.

“If Peter is sussing out your lies, you’re not doing a good enough job,” Matt said. “What you need, kiddo, is an aura and a starting point.”

Sam paused in making a horrible grating noise with some tool in his hand.

“A starting point?” he asked.

Why yes, apprentice.

As in, if you start off with your walls up and don’t let them buckle so easily, so many of these problems can be avoided.

“Isn’t that, like, the opposite of what Foggy said to do?” Sam asked suspiciously.

Well, technically. The husband might be correct for normal humans, but they weren’t normal humans. And as much as Matt loved him and thought he was brilliant, Foggy would never truly grasp that Matt needed those lies.

He needed the repression. The bottling. The anger.

He needed all that shit to be shaken up in him and then capped by the helmet every night.

Doing that kept Matt safe. It kept others safe.

It wasn’t fun and it wasn’t pretty and yeah, Matt was pretty fucked up because of it.

But Stick hadn’t been wrong about everything.

Not even he could be wrong about everything.

“It’s called balance,” Matt said. “Think about it like this. You’re a teacher. You’re about to walk into a new class. You need to establish a respectful relationship between yourself and these kids. How do you do it? Do you start off nice? Or do you start off strict?”

Sam said nothing.

“I start off strict,” Matt said. “Because it’s infinitely easier to become nicer and to keep respect than it is to start off nice and get meaner.”  

Sam processed this.

“This sounds like an anti-Foggy sentiment,” he said.

No. It wasn’t anti-Foggy. Nothing was anti-Foggy.

“It’s nuance,” Matt said. “Intrapersonal relationships? Minimal repression. Interpersonal relationships, maximum repression. Don’t give them something to use against you”

Sam’s teeth clicked together as he worked his jaw.

“Talk to Ned and Peter,” he said. “Walls up to everyone else.”

Everyone else. Yes.

“I can do that.”

Yeah, Matt knew. Sam did it to pretty much anyone he didn’t immediately take a liking to at the firm.

“I can do that,” Sam repeated.

Woah. Wait. Hold on there, slugger. Nuance, remember?

“I’m just gonna hate the entire world,” Sam said. “Thanks, Teach. That’s a big help.”

 ---

 PP: Matt

MM: Peter

PP: you know that Sam fucks with you daily right?

MM: …I forget sometimes

PP: lol you guys are funny

  That little shit. Fine.

Do whatever. See if Matt cared.

Goddamn kids and their goddamn love affairs.

Whatever. Fuck ‘em.

Let them learn the bullshit on their own time. Matt had better things to do.

 ---------------

Matt and Foggy and Kirsten have their own polycule goin on with folks entering and leaving it as need be. And sometimes you just have to make Sam/Ned content because it is unerringly adorable.

[fortheheavenssake]

MM ANON II - 2.

72. July 1

MM ANON ……… Hong gone ………… Melbourne hellbourn……… Britain made a wedding profit ??? …………… 4 th July closed. …………… Independent’s bug. …………Maple Kate forever……… George is upset…………… 🎼follow er of fashion 🎼………………… MM, a legend in her own lunchtime ……………… Wigan bin in ……………………air Bridge of size.

—————-

73. July 2

MM ANON ………OMG your under arrest………… video link………… across the border Scotland ……………surprise George …………… Charlotte leads………… Kate&William on top again ………… MM pathetic and mendacious ………… fakency lies……………… “ nice to be going soon cabbage“………… “ yes , I’m looking forward to a drive around the grounds” ………… “ shooting party’s this year” ……… “ doctors approval Philip “ …………” we’ll bring Sydney “……… “ Ahhh, that reminds me,Sydney!!”……… “Philip, it’s tic toc.”

——————-

74. July 3

MM ANON ………… 0600 hr. ……………… build,build,build, drink ,drink,drink …………… 🎼Braaaaaazil🎼……………… business as unusual …………… speak to the Guinness ………… TSDONY………… Subpoena ad testomonium…… theatre/ no theatre ……………… but not America ………… Lone Ranger……………… Mt, Rushmore ………… a bad day in LA ………… still hiding

—————-

75. July 4

MM ANON ……… formula sprog………… madness will spill………… stupid father………… no she wont’ yes she will……… Nigel’s illegal pint………… Williams cider………… Spain’s pain��…………… ahhhhhh, blonde bits …………… 🎼only the lonely🎼……………… for love or MONEY …………… HMTQ ( NENC) ………… with the contempt she deserves …………… it’s all a gamble , Arrrrrr!!

—————-

76. July 8

MM ANON ……… girl up the creek………hostage man. ………… half free meal………… drug exposure …………… …staff redundancy at HMTQ …………… boarding rules …………… most popular royal ……………… mines a cider……… ( where’s pg 💜💜) ……………”it’s Balmoral Philip, but not as we know it) …… out of his Depp-th… “ more 🎼Braziiiiil🎼…………… Spanish flu?? ……… 🎼we’re all going on a summer holiday 🎼

—————-

77. July 9

MM ANON …… HMTQ The long wait ………… BLM Trumps ………… no taxes………… boarding Charlotte 🥳🥳🥳……Boarding George 😱😱😱😱………… open the Jim…………… Brazil el Presidente……… Amber Amber,red……………IOC allow protest? ………… school 😷 masks. ……………cricket lovely cricket ………don’t cruise ………………glee, not today …………… tic-toc down. ……… red crane down.

—————-

78. July 10

MM ANON …THANK EVERYONE WHO ATTEMPTS AND GIVES SUCH CREATIVE ANSWERS. MY CONGRATULATIONS AND THANKS TO YOU ALL. 💜💜💜💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

79. July 10

MM ANON …… fly high Vera…………… Johnny poo…………… Murray mint Kate…………… now Pneumonia …………… Break cover……………… without merit ……… cover up Boris………… stop and search 😱😱😱…………… open theatre …………………… “ we want gan gan !! “ …………… “ we can visit Catherine “ …………… “ yes’ before Scotland “…………… “ clandestine William “ ……… “your grandfather will be ecstatic 🤣🤣🤣”

—————

80. July 11

MM ANON ………… relaxed on zoom…………… Leeds bleeds ………… office no office ………… compulsory …………… Brooklyn!! Yawn. ………… Smith, Will deny …………… “Well” , solve the mystery???…………… STONE cold guilty………… Bollywood in hospital ……………Beach sleep………… Tapes😱😱😱😱………… In secunda Eboracum venit ………… Boo-Hoo !!

——————

81. July 12

MM ANON ……… keep my sex life private…………… farm infectious …………… we don’t have to wear them…………… elephants virus ……………… sad swim ……………… down and out in LA…………… Burton blocks…………ROYAL BUTLER. ………… Fourteen Times!!!! ……………… Ritchies holiday camp …………ATMs lockdown ……………… electric scooters😱😱😱😱😱………… Kate tops poll

——————

82. July 13

MM ANON ……… heartbroken …………… musky Amber…… sleepy ice cream………… sad Lake……………… more organ warnings …………… huge slave factory’s ……………… tin foil………” never call your babies��???………………… second safest road ……………Forest Rambo…………………” you go old thing , it’s for the best” …………… “ I may stay!! “ …………… Ken. Palace bubble.

——————

83. July 14

MM ANON …… NO BAIL……… happy little people ………… gymnast aghast ………… George is not happy ………… a woke joke…………………… masked rats………………… carry on up the Amazon …………… “ so are White People” ……………… a new rash ……… HMTQ Royal zoom…………Black-burnt ……………… cut my card up………… veggies break out………… blame the dog-poo………………up up and Huawei………”

——————-

84. July 15

MM ANON …… Now a “married”abomination ………… girlfriends!! …………… HMTQ,will she , won’t she…………… Kate’s amazing ascension ……………… the feeding machine ………… a future Queen in all but name. …………… “ Yes!! A homogeneous bubble” …………… a sterile palace ………black Colorado ……… sir Tom?? …………… a hush hush holiday. …………… awoke to a scathing review.

—————-

85. July 16

MM ANON …… “ after re-watching the Crown how on Earth did HMTQ accept the DOEs dalliances…………… it’s a miracle she never castrated him……… GBHMTQAOGC

—————-

86. July 16

MM ANON ……… TODAYS RIDDLE IS A TRIBUTE TO OUR GLORIOUS MONARCHY … GBHMTQAOGC. …… Dear anons, take your time , this riddle is not a race …… GOD BLESS THE QUEEN.

——————

87. July 16

MM ANON …… HMTQ ……… The engagement …… The courtship …… The wedding …… The commonwealth tour……THE CORONATION …… The dalliances of Philip ……Her stoicism……… The children …… The 50/60/70/80/90…………PC/… W&K…… OUR MAGNIFICENT MONARCHY ……… The future legacy. ……… GBHMTQAOGC 🇬🇧

—————-

88. July 17

MM Anon for PG💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

MM ANON ……… DEAR PG. such a magnanimous and eloquent tribute for all anons to enjoy and wonder at your historical recollections and memorable facts. A thousand thanks. A labour of loving and informative joy. My thanks is to say we’re so lucky and blessed to have a PG. …… BRAVA!!

We are indeed! This was such a labor of love, truly wonderful, we are blessed indeed!🙏🏻💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

—————-

89. July 17

MM ANON …… Bea-discreet …………… “ give them a wave Philip, its a wedding “…………… “ I’m looking forward to congratulating the happy couple and sharing a few jokes “ ………… “ No Philip”…………… “ don’t be silly, I won’t say anything ……… “ NO PHILIP!! “ …………” what’s this Philip” ……… “ just a few notes” …………… “ you can’t say this!! ……… “ OK… bloody hell , it’s a joke” …………… “ if you said this , Italy would declare war!!” ……… “ bloody hell !!”

—————-

90. July 20

MM ANON ………… honeymoon Italia…… “hello my old China “…………… more engagements ………… Balmoral cottages ………… secret snaps ( eyes only) ………………”once upon a time “…………T. R. Ah. …………… the green eyed trasher ………… close the beaches …………… a coach full …………… Bea-frugal ……… unknown posie.

—————-

91. July 21

MM ANON … Hello anons , I have a hospital appointment today at 10.00. At the RD&E for tests and an MRI ,Sounds all a bit dramatic, I hope not , things could be better but ……… one day at a time ! I love you all ,dear Skippy,PG , LK …… all you beautiful anons who fill my world with love and humility. I sincerely love you all , acceptance is the answer to ALL my problems. 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜much love and hugs. ☘️☘️☘️☘️☘️☘️☘️☘️

———-

MM ANON...” in hospital at the moment, RD&E , so I cannot sleep, catheter!! I’ll attempt a riddle to keep myself awake. Much love to all

Oh…poor you! Prayers for you dear MM Anon..we are here for you❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

———-//—

92. July 22

MM ANON ………7 into 99…………The “wishing well”……… “ I can hear a canary singing “ …………… “ good news MM ANON, it’s not c***er🙏🏻………… By-polar …………… “ what , not the nurses” …………Biker Justice …………… Cor,i bin apologising …………… “ I wish her hell”……………… LA to stay away ……………… kiss and MAKE UP ………………Colonel Cam. ………… scouse rouse.

—————-

93. July 23

MM ANON ……… love life exposed …………… gift of jewellery ……………… it’s all a mask ………………… sister protection ……………… yippee ,Balmoral …………… 15 Bank accounts??……………… return to school??? ……………… “ it’s the theatre Jim, but not as they show it”………… Sending in Federal Troops ……………………Bojo crabs ……………… a strong union 🤣🤣🤣……………… 4 million. …………” are you coming Sydney”………… “indubitably sir”…………… “ stock the cellar!! “ ……… “ your request is my command sir” ………… “ and don’t tell anyone I’m driving the LR.”

—————-

94. July 24

MM ANON ……” since 1948 ,no changes ………… wags wobble………… phone a drone ………… Kim-vorce ……………… masked burger………… flowers for team Johnny ………… bailed out by old Bailey…………… Ban her from the palace ………………… tell all will destroy her……………… K&W&LCG will sunny fly to island???……………” I’ll drive Sydney!! “ ……… “ I’ll walk sir” …………… “ bloody get in”😱😱😱

—————-

95. July 25

MM ANON … … “ SHOWGIRL”…………… “that girl” ………… “ I don’t trust her “……………… quarantine …… “we never consulted the authors”😂😂😂……………”it’s a gym Jim, but not as they row it”………… “coming for a swim”…………… knock em for SIX……………Four!!!…………… “jump Frankie”…………” it’s only to the Glen Sydney “ …………… “ it’s three miles sir” ……… “ get the bloody hamper” ……… “I’ll drive back sir” ………… “ not a bloody chance Sydney” ……… “ then I refuse sir” ……… “get your bloody arse in the LR” … “reluctantly sir “😱😱

——————

96. July 26

MM ANON ………… BARC-ALONE-A……… no Transport home………on ya bike …………… obesities ………… floating for Vlad…………… Kim-jong-corona ………… Hurriicant ………… Moderna………Daisy down……… dog collar reunion …………………”more than kin and less than kind” ………… “ a three-pounder Sydney,the Gillie can smoke it” ………” Sydney, Sydney ……… SYDNEY???”

—————-

97. July 27

MM ANON:…… arrivals !!…………… HMTQ, “ ego lava manus meas”……………” you bloody talk to them”……………Kate cry’s lies………… lying interview……… O ‘no!! …………… one man and his dog…………… a foggy moggy……… “ let’s go shooting Sydney “………… “ with guns sir” ……… “ lots of bloody guns” ……………” O dear”

——————

98. July 28

MM ANON …… colourful Cam !!…………… Fast Far-raar-ri blast. …………” let your daughter breathe “…………… A niece wedding …………… Inappropriate funds??………… Bush tragedy ……………… inappropriately shamed royal ………… a pricey disinfect ………… “ you’re a spot on gun Man Sydney!!”………… “ a privilege sir” ……… “ how’s the shoulder?” ……… “ I’ll recover sir “……… “ it’s stopped bleeding “ ……… “ just a flesh wound sir “ ……… “ next week Sydney? ……… “ I hear the Gillie comes highly recommend sir”……… “Ahh, spiffing!! “

——————

99. July 29

MM ANON………… Peter,Crouch with William ………… 🎼Son in Law🎼…………Facebook , Apple, google …………… 5 friends , Shhhhhh !!!……………… very upset islands………… MM is leaking 🤣🤣………… Refund , Shmeefund.…………Heath-row row!!……… “Why is ones arm in a sling Sydney ??…………… “ I slipped exiting the LR ma’am………” where was Philip ?………… “ sitting in the back ma’am”……” hello old thing, what’ho Sydney “ ……… good afternoon sir”……” Sydney had a hiatus Philip “……… “ O dear, looks sore Sydney “ ……” yes sir”…… “VERY!!”

————-

100. July 30

MM ANON ( BALMORAL ANON )…… “ who’s this Sydney?” … “ Mr Angiss sir, he’s come to install Netflix “… “ Ahhh, EPIC, what’s your first name?”… “Angus sir “…Ehh !!!, Angus Angiss”…”yes sir “… “ bloody hell, that’s unfortunate “ … “ My mother had a sense of humour sir”… “ bit like me then, what say you Sydney?……………” indubitably sir” …… “ bloody marvellous, The Queen wants to watch Ozark, she loves a bit of the old ultra violence “……… “ right ‘ refreshments Sydney,I’m parched!!”…… “yes sir “

—————-

101. July 31

MM ANON …… Kate being scilly ……… ……… Borix nails down the caughin ………… roving explorer …………… phew! What a scorcher …………… Lions Arm-y…………… climate is a changing …………… ( get well mr, skippy 🌈) ……………beaches,stay away 😱😱………………Peer- pressure ‘ O brother!! …………… tick tick bite!! ……………”doctor, what’s growing on my arm.” …………… Williams conservs film

——————

[bloodandfire-kennyhickeyfanfic]

Chapter 15 - ...Year

Brooklyn New York, December 31 1994

As the night went on and the drinks continued to flow, I found myself slowing down just a little bit only because I wasn't exactly in the mood to have a hangover tomorrow morning. As we all sit at one of the table booths, since sitting up at the bar proved to be a little crowded than before, we all laugh and carry on joking with Kenny being so silly with me the entire time. He and Johnny start to reminisce over the last year, remembering stupid shit Peter had pulled on the Pantera tour, as well as even previous tours before that when they travelled to Europe the first time. Funny how ringing in another year will make you remember the past.

".... holy fuck did they ever live up to their name though," Kenny chuckles taking a sip of his beer.

"Who? Pungent Stench?" Johnny laughs.

"Yea... they didn't shower the entire month we were touring with them... jeezus that was..." Kenny says taking another sip and placing his arm around me as he leans back into the corner of the booth.

"Pungent?" I ask and Kenny and Johnny laugh hysterically.

"Oh baby, you have no fucking idea how pungent... awesome guys though just... holy fuck," Kenny says laughing.

"Fuck did I ever hate the fact that we toured in that fucking little van, in Europe with no heat in the middle of January, breathing steam in my bunk, it was so cold," Kenny says.

"Yea, too bad you didn't have Andi back then to keep you warm," Johnny laughs.

"Hey now she crawled into my bunk just as much as I crawled into hers," Kenny says setting his beer on the table in front of him.

"I don't know about that, you did sneak in with me a lot," I say and take a sip of my water.

"I didn't hear you complaining about it," Kenny glances at me.

"Are you kidding? Of course I complained, you just ignored me and laughed, climbing in anyways," I say looking up into his gorgeous brown eyes as he continues to smirk that sexy smirk of his, teasing me like he always does.

"I was keeping you safe," Kenny protests while Johnny and Carrie chuckle with us.

"Safe from what?" I giggle pushing a few curls out of my eyes.

"From... y'know... falling out of your bunk. The bus was pretty rocky at times and so I was protecting you from falling out," Kenny explains with a smirk. I raise my eyebrow and shake my head realizing that this teasingly innocent argument is going no where.

"Except for that time when Dime pulled you two out of her bunk to drink and you both collapsed on the floor, so that wasn't really protecting her was it?" Johnny chimes in, and we all laugh except Kenny just takes another sip of his beer squinting his eyes at Johnny.

"How in the hell did you stand these two?" Carrie giggles.

"Fuck, these two are nothing compared to having all four of them drunk and playing pranks on each other, ripping on each other... like... fuck," I say and take a sip of my water as Kenny glances at me with the silliest smile on his face, laughing his ass off with Johnny. Kenny then leans into me, brushing my curls off my shoulder and places his lips to that spot under my earlobe. Feeling his soft lips on my skin send shivers all over my body, I close my eyes and lean into him and suddenly it changes as his hand moves to my side and he starts to tickle me.

"Kenny!" I yelp laughing as he laughs, holding me to him and continues to torture me.

"Ok you two, enough with the adorable cuteness you got going on over there," Carrie says taking a sip of her drink.

"Would you guys like some New Years shots?" A bar girl offers as she comes around with a platter full of different colored shots.

"Sure, what time is it anyways?" Carrie asks.

"11:58," The bar girl says glancing at her watch as she passes out shots to us. We all thank her and she walks away as we get ready for the countdown to the new year. Then the whole bar starts the countdown. We all raise out shot glasses up and even though Johnny attempts to say something moving and meaningful, he is drowned out by the rest of the people in the bar.

"5... 4... 3... 2..." We all count together as I feel Kenny pull me closer into him.

"1... HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!"

Everyone screams and the local band that had been playing up on stage, starts their metal rendition of 'Auld Lang Syne' which in my opinion is the saddest song to ring in a new year with, and we all down our shots at once. Once I set my shot glass down on the table, pulling a face because that shot was extremely sour tasting and Kenny laughs.

"Not like JD huh?" He chuckles.

"No, that was gross," I say still pulling a face and he laughs.

"Happy new year baby," He says sweetly with that adorable Brooklyn accent, and I glance up at him, his gorgeous dark eyes looking into mine and I couldn't think of anywhere else I'd rather be.

"Happy new year," I say sweetly back as he touches his forehead to mine and closes his eyes and I could tell that there was something that he was holding back.

"Kenny?" I ask quietly slightly worried and he lifts his forehead from mine, brushing a few curls from my face and softly smiles at me, his dark eyes beaming. Then his smile slowly fades and he leans into me and brushes his lips so gently against mine, then immediately deepens the kiss, his tongue swiping across my bottom lip and I respond, sucking on that beautiful bottom lip of his, no caring who is in the room. Then after a few moments, he parts his lips from mine, touching his forehead back to mine, hesitating for a moment and placing a kiss to my forehead then going back to his beer and taking a sip.

"I need another beer, you want one baby?" He asks, his tone changing from before. I can't exactly explain it but I can just tell he's holding something back, I'm just not sure what it is.

"No, I'm ok," I say quietly and he slips out of the booth and makes his way back up to the bar as I watch him do so.

"Happy new year Andi," Johnny says sweetly breaking me out of the moment and I turn to him  and smile excitedly.

"Happy new year," I say happily and he embraces me in a hug. Then after a few moments, Carrie bounces around to my side smiling away saying Happy new year to me and I giggle embracing her in a hug as well. Then once Kenny returns, he and Johnny do their whole Happy new year thing as well, and before long it was time to head home.

We decided to walk back to Kenny's apartment, leaving Johnny and Carrie to head home on their own, since the newly January air was clear and perfect for a walk and at least we didn't have to pay for a cab home.

We decide to take a bit of the back way home, down a few back streets away from crowds of people walking home drunk, enjoying the cold but not too cold air as the puffs of steam leave our mouths with each breath we take. Kenny lights up a smoke as we walk, though we pretty much stay silent for the most part which still confuses me given the fact that we were having so much fun back at the bar.

"It's so nice out here, the sky is so clear, you can see the moon," I say quietly trying to make conversation as I look up at the sky while we make our way down the sidewalk. I glance up at him as he takes another drag of his cigarette, glancing at me with those dark eyes but still saying nothing.

"You alright?" I ask.

"Yea, why?" He exhales a cloud of smoke with his voice a little raspy.

"You just seem a little quiet or something..." I trail off as I look down at myself, my dark curls falling down.

"Nah, I'm just..." He trails off glancing down at our hands, our fingers laced together.

"Drunk?" I giggle, glancing back up at him after a few moments of more silence between us as we continue to walk down the sidewalk, and he still says nothing. He doesn't seem to be his usual silly self when he's drunk.  After a few more moments of him not saying anything he suddenly stops us and turns me to face him though his glance remains down at his feet.

"Kenny?" I ask worriedly, the steam bellowing from my lips as I speak and a stray dog barks off in the distance of the neighborhood we were standing in.

"I wanted to say this so many fucking times but I always fucking lost my nerve," He says still not looking at me. He takes the last drag of his cigarette and flicks it away somewhere as I continue to look at him not knowing just what he was talking about.

"Every time I thought I had the perfect moment, it was always ruined, or there were too many people around or we'd get distracted... then back at the bar it was the perfect time, even though there were so many people around us, it was the perfect time and I second guessed myself and left to get a beer," Kenny half chuckles and glances back at me with his dark eyes filled with emotion.

"Kenny, what - ?"

"Now I have the nerve to say it and I'm so fucking scared but I have to say it or else it's going to eat away at me that I didn't just take the chance," He says cutting me off and look at him wondering just what the fuck he is talking about. He reaches in the pocket of his jeans and I see him pull out a ring. Even though it was completely dark out here with only the street lights lighting up the neighborhood, I could see the diamond sparkling as he held it in his hand.

" I have never loved anyone in my life as much as I love you. I have never wanted anyone more than the way I want you. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me,"

I glance down at the ring that he held in his hand and all I could feel was my heart pounding and my body feeling like it was completely numb. Possibly from the alcohol and possibly from the cold but it was like everything seemed like it was in slow motion. Like I wasn't really inside my body anymore.

"I swear to fuck, that I will never love anyone as much as I love you,"

"Kenny - "

"I want you to marry me"

"What?" I breathe looking back up into his eyes.

"I want you to marry me,"

Brooklyn New York, January 1 1995

I stood at the apartment door making sure I had everything in my bag and zip up my leather jacket. Kenny, who stood in his ripped jeans and plain black T-shirt, his beautiful curls passed his shoulders, could barely look at me as I packed my things to go. There were so many things that I wanted to say but there wasn't any way that I could make it any easier for him. I've broken his heart. I never intended to hurt him at all. I never wanted to break his heart and I'm crumbling to pieces at the fact that I am doing so.

"You, um... you got your plane ticket?" He clears his throat.

"Yea," I say softly as I shove my keys in my pocket. I glance back at him trying to hold back my tears as he avoids my gaze. If I were him I wouldn't want to look at me either.

"Call me when you land... y'know just so I know you're ok," He says and quickly glances up at me.

"Ok," I say softly again. We stand there in completely silence not knowing what to say. What the fuck do you say when everything is once again falling apart. Only this time, I'm the one letting him fall when all along I was the one afraid to.

"Kenny I - "

"It's ok Andi... you don't need to say you're sorry anymore. I understand. Maybe not entirely but I understand... it's ok," He says, his tone firm but not angry, hurt but not sad in which I really can't blame him. As much as I wanted to tell him all the reasons why, there really is no use. He is allowed to feel the way he does, I just never thought that I would be the one to make him feel that way.

"You um, you better get going, you don't wanna miss your flight," He says quietly.

"Yea," I say quietly back. After a couple of more minutes, I wanted to just touch him one last time. I walk over to him and just as I was about to place my lips on his, he turns his head slightly and I connect with his cheek instead. I linger for a moment and then pull away, as my heart breaks but it doesn't even compare to the heartbreak I'm causing him. I reach up and place my hand on his chest, trying to make it better though I know it's not. He covers my hand with his and holds it for a moment.

"Andi please just... please just get the hell outta here," He says sadly but trying to be firm. I say nothing and slip my hand out from underneath his, turn quickly grabbing my bag and head for the door, wiping a tears as I do so. I don't look back as I open the door then close it behind me and walk as fast as I can down the stairs, letting the tears flow as I make my way out on to the street, hailing a cab and heading to the airport to go back home to Seattle.

To Be Continued In I Am The Highway...

[glowyjellyfish]

Started a round of watching the whole Disney Animated Canon yesterday on my birthday/day off; I did this once over a decade ago and got stuck around Treasure Planet and Atlantis and never finished (which is silly, as I do enjoy those movies), but then I was writing out lengthy essays/thoughts and posting them to livejournal. Not doing that this time. Only watching for fun so as not to burn out.

HOWEVER.

...is it just me, or is Fun and Fancy Free the weirdest-ass Disney animated movie? I mean, yeah, Chicken Little and Home on the Range are down there, too, and Saludos Amigos only really has “Jose Carioca!” and “animators on vacation!” going for it, but. Fun and Fancy Free has 

1. Bongo the Circus Bear. I mean, it’s fine, it’s cute, you can see why it couldn’t be a full-length movie and even I, lover of obscure Disney trivia, had never heard of it before I watched it and was like “...what is this nonsense?” but it’s fine. Still, bongo the circus bear. 

2. so... jiminy cricket crashes a weird live-action birthday party for what i assume must be a 40s child actor celebrity, attended only by what i assume must be a 40s celebrity ventriloquist and his ventriloquist dummies. This is the framing device for Mickey and the Beanstalk. I want to like Mickey and the Beanstalk! It looks good! It has starving feral Donald and Mickey riding a champagne cork! I just... why the narration and snarky comments from the weird ventriloquist and his dummies. you don’t need that, it’s a good short, let it speak for itself and stop making me want to punch you in the face, just shut the hell up. 

And yes, I know that these short compilation movies are basically because of WW2, and they had to do something to get what they had out there earning money. There’s nothing wrong with that. I love Melody Time (Johnny Appleseed! Pecos Bill! More Jose! Tons of Mary Blair artwork!), and I’m actually bummed that Disney+ chose not to have Make Mine Music (look, I know there’s a weirdly large amount of guns and alcohol in this and just cutting that out makes it too small, but I grew up on The Martins and The Coys short, and Casey at the Bat which is frankly amazing, and to a lesser degree Peter and the Wolf!)... but I feel that Fun and Fancy Free is just a little awkward, which is a shame.

I did a favorites list when I was first doing this project; it’s no longer a Project but I wanna do that again just for the heck of it. Having watched through Fun and Fancy Free, according to D+’s organization, my favorites are: 1. Pinocchio, 2. The Three Caballeros, 3. Dumbo, 4. Snow White, 5. Fantasia, 6. Bambi, 7. Fun and Fancy Free, 7. Saludos Amigos. Had Make Mine Music been here, I suspect it would be 6, bumping the last three down.

[angelofberlin2000]

by Natalie Finn | Fri., May. 17, 2019 3:00 AM

When Keanu Reeves was asked the other night, "What do you think happens when we die?" interviewer Stephen Colbert probably wasn't expecting such a deep—or assured—answer from the movie star.

"I know that the ones that love us will miss us," the 54-year-old actor said sagely, rendering the Late Show host unusually speechless.

It was a sincere, thoughtful response—vintage Reeves, really—from someone who's had reason to think about such things.

"I haven't really thought about my career future, or what was going to happen, until really recently," he also told GQ in February. Asked why he started thinking about it, he replied, "Death!"

Watch https://www.eonline.com/videos/289305/how-keanu-reeves-training-for-john-wick-3-compares-to-the-matrix

How Keanu Reeves' Training for John Wick 3 Compares to The Matrix

The still eerily youthful-looking Reeves, who's back in theaters Friday in the third installment of the blockbuster John Wick franchise, has become a brand unto himself, the name "Keanu" signifying not just movie stardom but also a certain kind of performance and even a state of mind: chill, zen, blissfully checked out ("Sad Keanu" meme notwithstanding). His name—which has lent itself to a comedy about a cat and a recent hit song by Logic, and which of course a studio exec wanted him to change when he first came to Hollywood—does mean "cool breeze over the mountains" in Hawaiian, after all.

But still waters run deep, and despite being in the public eye for more than 30 years, he's one of the least-known people whose chiseled face you would recognize anywhere. Few play it as close to the vest as Reeves, who, though he does the occasional interview and shows up to fulfill his side of the bargain in promoting his films, does not talk about his personal life. And not in the way that most celebrities don't really talk about their personal lives.

As in, it's entirely unclear if he even has one, although—look at him—he must.

"I came to Hollywood to be in movies," Reeves told Parade recently. "I feel really grateful that I've had that opportunity, but I'm just a private person, and it's nice that can still exist."

He doesn't even publicize his charity work, but his causes include children's hospitals, fighting cancer, the arts and the environment. 

"I always find it surreal that complete strangers come up and ask me personal questions," he told Parade back in 2008. "I don't mind speaking about work, but when the talk turns to 'Who are you?' and 'What do you do off-screen?' I'm like, 'Get out of here.' I've been in situations where people have felt they had a relationship with me or something and I didn't even know who they were."

Not that Reeves is an anti-star. He lives in the hills above West Hollywood, spent plenty of time enjoying the local nightlife in his youth and has starred in countless quotable action movies—and gets paid handsomely for them, enough so that he can take off and do passion projects like his first (and only, to date) directorial effort, 2013's The Man of Tai Chi, or show up unheralded on a Swedish sitcom (Swedish Dicks, now on Pop) or in any indie film he so desires, like the recent Destination Wedding, an acerbic comedy that reteamed him with Bram Stoker's Dracula co-star Winona Ryder.

He's perfectly congenial yet usually looks somewhat serious, but not because he's taking himself seriously—more as if he wants to answer even the most lighthearted of questions with respectful gravity. But hey, as Stephen Colbert just found out, if you ask Reeves a potentially loaded question, prepare to get an answer.

Asked by Parade in 2008 if he believed in aliens, because he was playing the alien Klaatu in a remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still, he replied, "Some days I do. Some days I don't. There's so much unexplained and unexplainable phenomena that's presented to us. But beyond that, the cosmos is so vast. We can't be the only sentient entity. It might not look like us, but it's going to be out there."

His signature Keanu cadence used to be mistaken for a sign of vacuity, but Reeves attributed however he came off in interviews to his overall discomfort with talking about himself.

"I've never played stupid to keep someone distant," he told Vanity Fair in 1995. "I don't play stupid. Either it's been a failure on my part to articulate, or my naivete, or ingenuousness, or sometimes it's the nature of the form... And you know, I find myself more able to give an explanation of a project five years later than in the middle of it. It's so present-tense! I can tell you how I feel, but its context is harder to explain... Sometimes when I'm interviewed I'm not ready to do that. So you say...'excellent!' And you know what, man? It's OK."

It certainly was.

Ted Theodore Logan, Johnny Utah, Jack Travern, Neo, John Wick: all characters that had to be played by Reeves. He's done everything from Shakespeare to sports flicks to A Scanner Darkly, and soon you'll be hearing his voice as Duke Caboom, a motorcycle-riding stuntman with a wistful backstory, in Toy Story 4, which will probably sneak in to top The Matrix Reloaded, which made $742 million worldwide, as his single highest-grossing movie.

"So I made Duke a little more gravelly but still tried to give him energy and a big personality," Reeves shared with Entertainment Weekly in March. "I just thought that Duke should love what he does. He's the greatest stuntman in Canada! I wanted him to be constantly doing poses on the bike while he was talking, to have this great extroverted passion."

He turned down Speed 2 to play Hamlet onstage in Canada. He was one of the first big stars who memorably jammed on the side with his own band, Dogstar, in the '90s and now he co-owns a custom bike shop called ARCH Motorcycle in Hawthorne, Calif, because he loves motorcycles as much as you think he does.

"Riding can be a place to think and feel. It's a way to work things out," he recently told Parade, noting that inclement weather doesn't stop him. "I like riding in the rain. It's a little more sketchy." He rides mainly alone, but he and the ARCH crew cruise Pacific Coast Highway on Sunday mornings.

And if motorcycles provide one soul-soothing salve for Reeves, acting provides another.

"In acting, you're constantly discovering new feelings and thoughts and exposing yourself to them," he told Parade in 2008. "I guess it could be considered psycho-therapy. All I know is that, as an actor, I can tell you a story that you'll listen to. Maybe it won't just entertain you, it might also teach you something. I think film has the power to change your life if you want to let it.

Combine his real-life inscrutability with his is-it-genius-or-does-he-just-do-the-same-thing-every-time approach to acting, and he's become more myth than man—and that, too, is a huge part of his appeal. He's just so Keanu.

"I don't own a computer and I don't e-mail," he said in the 2008 

Parade

interview. "I'm fascinated by people who freak out when they don't get an instant response to an e-mail. It's like they expect as soon as they send an email to get the answer back and if they don't it's like awful. I just hope people won't totally lose the ability to write letters because it's a good way to communicate."

He preferred typewriters, Reeves said—and we can only hope he and Toy Story star Tom Hanks had a chance to talk about typewriters together.

"I only have good things to say about him," Swedish Dicks star Peter Stormare, who met Reeves doing Constantine in 2005, which led to the actor's role on his show, told GQ. "Once a year, we'll have a beer together and talk about life and things. He's very private. He leads his life the way he wants to lead it. And I guess it can be lonely sometimes. But I think he's just like me. There's a comfort in being alone sometimes, especially when you're working on something."

"We bonded over motorcycles, bass guitar, and Harold Pinter," Alex Winter, the Bill to his Ted, also told the magazine. "Reeves had a really good book collection."

Reeves was born in Beirut, to a Hawaiian father and English mother, but they divorced when he was about 2. Mom Patricia remarried in the US., but after that didn't work out she settled with a 7-year-old Keanu and his younger sister, Kim, who was born in Australia, in Toronto. Reeves reportedly hasn't spoken to his dad since he was 13. 

"We were latchkey kids," he told Esquire in 2017. "It was basically 'leave the house in the morning and come back at night'. It was cool." But, he told Parade, "Even for a runaway English girl, my mother gave us a proper upbringing. We learned manners, respect for our elders, formal table settings. I also learned a nonprejudicial, nonjudgmental acceptance of other people."

His favorite part of school was doing plays and studying Shakespeare in English class, so he dropped out at 17 to try his hand at acting.

"My attendance record was very bad. I was lazy," Reeves told Vanity Fair. "I knew I wanted to act when I was halfway through grade 11, I guess, and school wasn't important."

His first acting job came on the Canadian series Hangin' In in 1984. Then he moved to Los Angeles and made his big-screen debut in the Rob Lowe-starring drama Youngblood in 1986. Later that year he won his first major role in the gritty teen crime drama River's Edge, which went on to win Best Feature at the Independent Spirit Awards.

So it was off to the races for Reeves, who in the next five years made a wildly diverse array of movies, including the very-'80s comedy The Night Before, Dangerous Liaisons, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (and its sequel, Bogus Journey), Parenthood, Point Break and My Own Private Idaho.

He was very much living the fast Hollywood life, and it wasn't all charmed.

In 1993, River Phoenix died of an accidental drug overdose—another painful thing Reeves didn't want to talk about, but he spoke fondly of his friend and My Own Private Idaho co-star.

"I enjoyed his company. Very much," Reeves told Rolling Stone in 2000. "And enjoyed his mind and his spirit and his soul. We brought good out in each other. He was a real original thinker. He was not the status quo. In anything."

As for Phoenix's death, "It's something he thinks about all the time, something he never really talks about," a friend told People. "Friends know not to go there with him."

In 1994 his estranged father, Samuel, was sentenced to 10 years in prison for drug possession in Hawaii, but was released in two. "Jesus, man. No, the story with me and my dad's pretty heavy. It's full of pain and woe and fucking loss and all that s--t," he told RS around that time. In 1995, he told Vanity Fair, when asked why he didn't want to know more about his dad's case, "Why would I want to find out what I didn't know?" He called the situation "pretty incredible," and that was that.

Reeves has a massive scar on his abdomen from when he suffered a rupture spleen in a motorcycle crash while riding in L.A.'s Topanga Canyon in 1988. He went into a hairpin turn going about 50 mph.

"I call that a demon ride," he reflected to Rolling Stone. "That's when things are going badly. But there's other times when you go fast, or too fast, out of exhilaration...I remember saying in my head, 'I'm going to die.'"

"I remember calling out for help," he continued. "And someone answering out of the darkness, and then the flashing lights of an ambulance coming down. This was after a truck ran over my helmet. I took it off because I couldn't breathe, and a truck came down. I got out of the way, and it ran over my helmet."

Also while his star was on the rise, his sister Kim battled cancer for years starting in the late '80s. "He helped me through," she told Vanity Fair about her brother. "When the pain got bad, he used to hold my hand and keep the bad man from making me dance. He was there all the time, even when he was away."

Actor and Dogstar bandmate Roger Mailhouse told Rolling Stone about Reeves in 2000, "He's a really giving person. He'd give you his last shoe. Really smart, too. He's incredibly booksmart. He's a really interesting person who doesn't talk a lot of s--t."

Asked how his friend had changed over the past decade, i.e. the '90s, Mailhouse said, "I don't worry about him as much. I used to worry about him. Because I think of him as one of my best friends in the world, was he going to crash his motorcycle, or this or that. We did some wild things. I guess it's just growing up. I don't know—maybe it had something to do with River Phoenix, maybe. Losing someone close to him. But now I'm just proud of him. He's getting to do it the right way."

For years you'd be much more likely to see Kim or Patricia on Reeves' arm at a premiere or other big event—such as when he got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in 2005—than any girlfriend, and the actor hasn't been publicly involved with anyone for years.

Not that he hasn't been linked to a bevy of his co-stars, including Sandra Bullock and Charlize Theron, but if he's in a serious relationship, it's not with a celebrity.

On The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon in 2013 he was wearing what anyone would take for a wedding band on his left ring finger, but no revelations ever sprang from that accessory choice.

When Parade asked recently if he remained a bachelor, Reeves replied (squirming a bit, according to the magazine), "Well, I'm not married."

Through the interviews he's given over the years, a theme running through them is the visible discomfort he starts to evince when the conversation veers toward the too-personal. And some topics are just off-limits altogether.

Reeves started dating actress Jennifer Syme after meeting her at a party in 1998 and they were expecting a baby together—but the child, a girl they named Ava, was stillborn at 8 months. They laid her to rest in January 2000, according to People, and broke up weeks later.

Read

Sandra Bullock Almost Starred in The Matrix Instead of Keanu Reeves

They remained close up until Syme, who suffered from severe postpartum depression, died in 2001 when she crashed her Jeep Cherokee into several parked cars on a L.A. street and was thrown from the vehicle. In 2002, her mother, Maria St. John, sued Marilyn Manson, who had thrown a party that Syme attended that night, for wrongful death, alleging he had given Syme  the cocaine that an autopsy found in her system. 

"After Jennifer was sent home safely with a designated driver, she later got behind the wheel of her own car for reasons known only to her," Manson, who knew Syme through filmmaker David Lynch and had worked with her on Lost Highway, said in a statement.

The rocker continued, "This lawsuit, which is completely without merit, will not bring back Jennifer's life. It serves only to reopen the wounds and the pain felt by all who loved Jennifer. It is a pity that St. John sullies her own daughter's reputation by filing this baseless claim."

They reportedly reached a settlement out of court, but Manson maintained he had nothing to do with Syme taking drugs that night. 

Reeves has never spoken publicly about his relationship with Syme, which certainly fits right into how he was before, let alone since. But he grieved. And he eventually had something to say about that.

"I think, after loss, life requires an act of reclaiming," he told Parade in 2006. "You have to reject being overwhelmed. Life has to go on."

The actor continued, "Grief changes shape, but it never ends. People have a misconception that you can deal with it and say, 'It's gone, and I'm better.' They're wrong. When the people you love are gone, you're alone. I miss being a part of their lives and them being part of mine. I wonder what the present would be like if they were here—what we might have done together. I miss all the great things that will never be."

So he knew exactly what he was talking about when he told Colbert, "I know that the ones that love us will miss us."

Calling it "unfair" and "absurd," Reeves told

Parade

, "All you can do is hope that grief will be transformed and, instead of feeling pain and confusion, you will be together again in memory, that there will be solace and pleasure there, not just loss."

"Much of my appreciation of life has come through loss," he concluded. "Life is precious. It's worthwhile."

He said at the time that he would like to have a family, and reiterated the sentiment a couple years later, but Reeves told Esquire in 2017 with regards to "settling down": "I'm too… it's too late. It's over." Asked to clarify, he added, "I'm 52. I'm not going to have any kids."

Famous last words from a litany of 50-something men, and he was reminded of that. Reeves just said, "That's a whole other… But no. I'm glad to still be here."

"I'm every cliché," he continued. "F--king mortality. Ageing. I'm just starting to get better at it. Just the amount of stuff you have to do before you're dead. I'm all of the clichés, and it's embarrassing. It's all of them. It's just, 'Oh my God. OK. Where did the time go? How come things are changing? How much time do I have left? What didn't I do?' I'm trying to think of the line from the sonnet… 'And heavily from woe to woe tell o'er / The sad account of fore-bemoaned moan / Which I new pay as if not paid before.'"

"So, yeah," he added, reportedly with a smile. "I'm that guy."

In turn, Reeves can't help but come off as the solitary figure he so often plays in his films, from Constantine to The Matrix to John Wick. Heck, even Duke Caboom sounds a little melancholy.

At the same time, you're just as likely to see him in a romantic tear-jerker or a quirky comedy as a shoot-em-up. He's played heroes and hustlers, sweethearts and cruel villains, teachers and  slackers, doctors and lawyers.

"For me, it's just continuing to be able to work with great artists and tell stories that people enjoy," Reeves told Parade. "I was always hoping, even when I was young, that I could do different things," he says. "I'm really grateful for that. I'm

Though he had no idea John Wick would be such a hit, Reeves was in top form in the 2014 action extravaganza as a retired hit man who goes on a revenge spree after gangsters kill the beloved dog that was a gift from his late wife.

It made almost $89 million on a reported $20 million budget. Sequel time!

"You hope and you dream but the reality is even sweeter," he told E! News in 2017 about the first film's surprise success when he was promoting John Wick: Chapter 2. "It's great to be involved in a project that has so much affection."

Chapter 2 made $172 million worldwide.

Now back for John Wick: Chapter 3—Parabellum, Reeves has revealed that he started training heavily about three months before filming began to get back into dynamo shape, and he still goes whole-hog (or horse, in this movie's case) in the action sequences, right up until a car runs into him.

"I'll do some fight scenes and then John Wick will get hit by a car," Reeves explained to Colbert on The Late Show, "and that's Jackson Spidell, who's an amazing stuntman." Spidell has been Reeves' stunt double in all the John Wick movies. "He gets hit by the car, then I'll get up from the car, then I'll do a whole bunch more of, like, gun-fu and whatever, jujitsu, judo—and then, if I get thrown off something, Jackson does his thing."

Even more exciting for some fans, however, depending on whether you like your Keanu dark or more dude-like, is the news that he and Alex Winter are finally set to start shooting Bill & Ted Face the Music, the much-discussed follow-up to 1989's Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure and sequel Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey, which came out in 1991. The years-in-the-making comedy is tentatively due out in 2020.

And so on his latest press tour, Keanu Reeves left his usual trail of breadcrumbs. They may not lead you straight to his door, but they'll definitely keep you on the path.

[crisscolferfanforever]

Milwaukee Law after Shock

We see the wapuan correctional facility we see a man named Larry Edwards who was found guilty 2 years ago of a murder of a boy that he raped in

Milwaukee country a case that peters and Megan prosecutor and ray and his detectives investigate we see him eating his breakfast she has a

conversation with another rapist

MR. Scott  

“Heard you did okay last night”.

Larry Edwards looks at Scott

Larry  

“Meatloaf and mash”.

 Scott  

“A couple of Dr Peppers”.

Another man name Jeff who is serving a 25years to life for a murder in

Merrill Wisconsin  

Jeff  

“I would've gone with a pizza, sausage and pepper”.

Larry looks at the guys  

Larry  

“I am not on death row “

Jeff  

“Maybe I should start over”.

Scott  

“I bet you get a real kick out of that.

Now's not a good time to go crybaby, Mickey.

Yeah, right.”

Larry leaves to go back to his cell  

Larry  

“In your dreams”.

He goes to his cell which he is approach by a guard  

Jason  

“You sure about the priest?”

Mr. Edwards goes to Church every Sunday trying to find his faith  

Larry  

“I’m sure”.

Jason  

“How about the curtain? “

Larry  

“What about it?”

Jason  

“It's your choice, Mr.

Edwards. Open or closed?”

Larry  

“What would you like?”

Jason  

“Closed.”

Larry  

“Then close the sucker “

Jason  

“Fine.”

Jason leaves as Larry meets in his cell with a priest as they began his

service

Larry  

“Like a damn fish in a barrel”.

Eric  

“Want to say anything?”  

Larry who is dying of aids drops his pants in front of the priest and he

snaps  Larry  

“Do it.”

We approach Ray’s office Ray is talking to Jerry and char on a case that

end when the phone rings  

Ray  

“Curtis here”

Ray looks at Char and jerry

Ray (counties)  

“Thank you, MR. Stone, “

He hangs up the phone  

Ray  

“that was Mr. Stone at appoxirity 8:00 am guards at the Green Bay Prison

Larry Edwards was found dead in his cell they believe he killed himself

after he forced himself on a persist “

Jerry  

“ok after that I need a bit to eat “

He leaves  

We see Megan and Peter driving on Water street in a traffic jam  

Peter  

“They should ban cars in Milwaukee “.

Megan looks at him  

Megan  

“What”

Peter drinks  

Peter  

“no pithy response”  

Megan  

“You leave me speechless”.

Peter  

“Nobody forced you to watch it”.

Megan gets stop on Wisconsin Ave

Megan  

“I can't imagine what it must be like, staring at a clock, knowing the

exact moment”.

Peter  

“Adele Saunders thought she was going to work.

She ended up dead.”

Megan  “Your pity's misplaced.

I'm tired of arguing, peter “.

Peter  

“Good.”

Megan

“You know, I'm not feeling too well.

Must be the flu.”

Peter  

“Yeah, The flu.”

Peter  

“Want to take the day? No, I've got Silverman”.

Megan  

“I'll cover”.

Peter  

“What? You sure? Okay, fine”.

Peter gets out of car  

Megan  

“I'll drop you off at the office”.

Peter  

“No problem”.

Megan  

“And you've got Schwinger”.

Peter  

“She'll wait. I’ll take a cab.”

Megan  

“Maybe you'll feel better”.

Peter  

“I'll call you later.”

We go back to Ray’s Office we see char and ray  Char

“Hell, of a way to spend your day off.”

Ray sits down  

Ray  

“He just twitched”.

Jerry  

“his eyes were wide open, case closed.”

Char  

“What did you expect, a dozen archangels strumming their harps?”  

Ray  

Well, Larry Edwards going to have nothing to do with angels.

Who knows? Maybe somebody somewhere will learn something from this.

Yeah, the 30 friends and neighbors that cheered when he ripped off Greg

Boyce pants and raped him.”

Jerry  

“You want to get some Chinese, char? I guess death make me hungry.”

Char  

“Actually, I've got some files I've got to finish up.”

Jerry  

“Hey, watch out, Lieutenant.

This kid's gunning for your job”.

Ray  

“Yeah, well, it doesn't get her any overtime.”

They go outside to their office where the clapping begins  

Steve  

“So, where you are going, to Disneyland?”  

Jerry

“Knock it off, Profaci.”

Mike  

“What's up with him?”

Char sits down  

Char  

“He lost the lotto.” Ray  

“Takes it personal.”

Steve  

“Beginning of a new era, huh, Ray?”  

Jerry  

“We're just lucky that Edwards kept his lawyers out of it until the

bitter end.”

We go into Peter’s office where they are discussing a plea deal and

talking about today  

Kim  

“So, what's it like, man? What? was the guy green when you saw him? Does he lose control of his bodily functions or what? That would be cruel and

unusual.”

Peter  

“Yeah.”

Johnny gets his brief cases out

Johnny  

“For the poor SOB who had to clean up the vomit when they found him.”

Peter gets to business  

Kim  

“Man, two peters? Three-to-nine?”  

Peter  

“Not a chance Man one. Five-to-15.”

Johnny  

“Is that the best you can do? A bird in the hand, David.

Right.”

Peter  

“My mistake.”

They look at Peter  

Kim  

“you guys give us a moment “

They leave  

Kim looks at her friend from Law school  

Kim

“what’s going on”

Peter  

“I don’t think I should have came to work “

Kim  

“is it because of your father “

Peter  

“just a little bit “

Kim  

“I forgot how easy this job is for you when you don't have any choices.

Marissa and Kevin Mandalay.”

The come back in  

Peter  

“Nothing to talk about, Man one all around.”

Kim  

“Come on, peter.”

Johnny  

“Marissa's an honors student, a member of the math club.

Who likes to hold up bodegas?”

Peter  

“Oh, that was Kevin.”

Johnny  

“Marissa just thought they were going in for Ding Dongs.

With an Uzi?”  

Kim  

“She's a good kid, peter.”

Johnny  

“Give her aiding and abetting.”

Kim  

“Kevin, he goes the distance.”

Peter  

“Sorry.”

Kim then calls Peter out of the office  

Kim  

“I love as a Friend and as college friend and co-worker please what’s

going on “

Peter  

“I am just not in the mood “

Kim  

“did you call Stacy”

Peter  

“she won’t help”

Kim  

“I get it you hate losing and I know she needs take reasonability for

her actions so let’s talk about it on Monday “

Peter nods  

Kim  

“when is Megan going to be in the office “

Peter  

“she’s thinking of quitting “

Kim  

“so that’s what’s bothering you “

Peter  

“yes”

They walk into peter’s office

Peter  

“I will make you an offer on one condition”

Johnny  

“were open ears peter “

Peter  

“we wait until Monday morning “

Johnny looks at Kim  

Johnny  

“deal”

We see Jerry eating lunch without char with a bunch of guys  

Buddy  

“So, me and Jerry are still in uniform.”

Jerry eats his Chinese  

Jerry  

“yeah and in 25 years on force in Milwaukee I have never seen a dumb

crime “

Buddy  

“tell them about the case that happen 3 years ago “

Jerry  

“oh, so we had a simple assault case and the mother came to bail him out

and “

Buddy  

“the bail was 650 and she paid all of it “

Jerry  

“in Nickels “

They all laugh  

The waiter comes in  

Glen  

“so, do you guys want any more “

Jerry  

“I am leaving I got go see my son”

Glen  

“that will be 12.50”

Jerry  

“here’s a 20 and keep the change handsome “

They all laugh  

We approach the 2-9 where Ray and Char are working on the Larry Edwards

case for paper work  

Char  

“I can’t do this anymore”

Ray  

“what’s the problem “

Char  

“why are we still working on this “

Ray  

“unknown victims “

Char  

“I can’t take this right now”

Steve comes in  

Steve  

“what’s the matter “

Ray  

“let’s go home for the day and come back later I think this whole day is

getting us where we are now “

Steve

“ok”

They leave  

we approach the DA office Ryan comes into peter office  

Ryan  

“I got to do a news conference to do and I don’t want to do it “

Peter  

“It will be fine “

Ryan  

“it’s not New York city where it’s a death sentence “

Peter  

“I know my Father was the DA there for 25 years “

Ryan

“ok, where is Megan”

Peter  

“she’s got the Flu “

Ryan  

“alright what are you doing “

Peter  

“I am going have lunch with J.K and Liz “

Ryan  

“ok”

They leave the office  

We approach Peter who is at a lunch with the two  

Olivet  

“so, they found him hanging “

Peter  

“yes “

J.k comes in sits at the table

J.k

“well how is the family of Greg Boyce and John Kohler doing “

Peter  

“I spoke to Linda and James and they don’t want to talk about it “

Olivet  

“well I can see that after 3 years you think they got the courage to

talk “

Peter drinking his water  

Peter  

“no “

J.k

“how many killings was he suspected of “

Peter  

“30 Killing , 60 rapes , then these are all boys  “

Olivet  

“well I got a patient at four about this “

Peter  

“what’s good here “

J.K

“the pasta is “

Peter  

“good I’ll have that “

Olivet  

“oh speaking that , I got the Kimberly Neweman file for you “

J.K

“that is brutal “

Olivet  

“she kills her husband simple because she didn’t get what she got in the

Divorce “

Peter  

“sounds Like Diane Brochardt “

J.K  

“copy cat “

Peter  

“can we just eat”

They look at peter  

Olivet  

“you saw a man dead and you were supposed to do nothing “

We approach Jerry eating Lunch with his son at Beans and Barley where they talk about life in general starting with the Whitehouse  

Jerry  

“Can you believe Richie? “

His son James looks at him

James  

“I am voting for Bartlett “

Jerry  

“I am too”

James  

“well my basketball season went well “

Jerry  

“tell me about it “

James  

“well We lost in the Sectional Finals to Pewaukee finished 20-6 “

Jerry  

“they should add two more games “

James  

“ha-ha, I miss when Division 1 Had three days at Madison “

Jerry

“same “

Jerry keeps on eating  

James  

“what’s going dad “

Jerry looks at his son  

Jerry  

“this morning I was called to Dodge County and I saw a body of an inmate that I arrested, and I wasn’t supposing Invest age my Job is to see dead people daily and then fine the son of a bitch who did it and today I

didn’t “

James  

“dad don’t feel bad “

Jerry  

“thank you “

We see Peter at a bar on Milwaukee’s Brady Street where he is still waiting to hear from Megan he talks with the Bartender  

Peter  

“it’s a Bitch? who the wife the husband, the kids, and then he’s like

yeah all of those things”

Mike  

“you Ben Stone’s son “

Peter  

“yeah “

Mike  

“I have never seen you before here but only on tv “

Peter  

“My old man was a DA in New York for 30 years he has worked notable cases like the case involving Frankie Boy Jordan “

Mike  

“the Mob of New York”

Peter  

“yes, and his down fall was the mob”

Mike  

“tell me about it “

Peter takes a drink and starts talking  

Peter  

“he was trying a case that had a wittiness that was in fear for her life and when he return after the not guilty verdict came in the men that were on trial went after her and shot her so I was about 16 my mother was home and she heard the door slam my father was down stairs drinking he did not come up my mother was worried it was 11 pm she found him dead

“

(the Music gets tense)  

We approach the 2-9 where we see ray on the phone with Steve wife

Ray  

“hey how are you doing I am good, he left but I will check and get back

to you “

Ray walks out and see Jason  

Ray  

“hey Soderberg where did Steve go off too “

Jason  

“I think he went get away “ Ray  

“well his wife is calling “

Jason  

“I will call him “

Ray  

“Thank you “

We see Steve out in Bayshore Mail just reading a book and eating a

pretzel where he gets a call on his cell  

Steve  

“hello”

It’s his wife  

Steve

“hey what’s, I am in Whitefish Bay right now you want to come up,

alright see you in bit “

He keeps on reading  

We approach Jerry and his son walking in Walker’s point  

Jerry  

“so, who are you playing for non-conference “

Ken  

“we play two games in New York then we play Tosa West , Tosa east ,

Wisco , and Milwaukee Washington”

Jerry  

“you trying to get a one Seed “

Ken   “yeah”

Jerry  

“do you know who your playing in New York “  

Ken  

“We are playing Buffalo East and La Luleuime “  

Jerry  

“wow “

Ken  

“I get back to work if you need anything just let me know “

Jerry  

“thank you “

We approach Marquette Law School where Megan’s Brother Max is teaching

she enters as  

Max  

“how is it possible that DOMA and Prop 8 where struck down in the courts, while other cases had the react opposite holding? Miss Johnson?”

Johnson  

“the 14th Amendment “

Max  

“you are partly correct “

Johnson just looks dumbfounded

Max  

“remember class what did the people that were fighting case want, Miss

Johnson try again “

Johnson  

“Equal protection “

Max  

“that is correct, class the people wanted to be treated just like everyone eles it wasn’t about a social event that they were going to

remember that now “

Class is dismissed  

Megan waits for her brother

Max  

“you here for a re do “

Megan  

“some things never change, you pulled equal rights stuff on me “

Max

“no, we are talking about the 14th Ademenht, what do you want to talk

about “

Megan  

“Larry Edwards “

Max  

“I heard he committed suicide”

Megan  

“I still wish Wisconsin had the death plenty “

Max  

“I can tell you why I am not for it and why I am here instead of the

court room in Chicago “

Megan  

“why are you against it “

Max

“let’s go up to my office “

We approach the Bar where Jerry comes in  

Jerry looks at the bar as peter is on the phone probably to Adam  

Jerry  

“is this seat taken “

Hank  

“yes, my friend “

Jerry  

“who is your friend “

Hank points  

Jerry turns around  

Jerry  

“oh great, this guy is trouble you do know that “

Peter  

“Jerry how’s it going “

Jerry  

“I need a Club Soda “

Hank  

“long day”

Jerry  

“no depression “

Peter  

“hank Cheer him up “

We go back to Max’s office where he and Megan are discussing Larry

Edwards  

Max  

“so, he died “

Megan  

“yes “

Max  

“why do you care “

Megan  

“because my Boss and I had a fight”

Max

“your fighting with Stone “

Megan  

“yeah “

Max  

“remember what Penn taught you, and you will be fine “

Megan  

“yeah, “

Max  

“your mother and father want you to come and visit “

Megan just looks and leaves

We approach Ray and Megan at the 2-9  

Ray  

“man, I order way too much “

Jake  

“well what do you want to do “

Megan comes in  

Ray  

“hey you what’s up “

Megan  

“not much “

Ray

“I order the orange Chicken and general Tso with Pancakes do you want

any of it “

Megan  

“sure, Death makes me hungry “

Ray

“what do you want you pick “

Megan  

“give me that general “

They start eating  

Ray  

“so, how’s the office “

Megan  

“I am good “

Ray  

“it’s a mess trying to get Larry Edwards confession in writing for the

court it’s so brutal”

Megan  

“Ryan did a Press conference “

Ray  

“I saw that “

Steve comes in  

Steve  

“hey sorry to bother you but Kate is doing a press conference “

They turn it on  

Ray and Megan watch the confessions  

Ray

“ok change the channel “

Megan  

“it’s so brutal “

Megan eats a pancake

Megan  

“how’s Jess doing “

Ray  

“busy with the kids they so adorable “

Megan  

“I had a reunion today”

Ray  

“with who “

Megan  

“my Brother Max he teaches at Marquette “

Ray  

“how did that go “

Megan

“very Painful “

Ray  

“I am sorry to hear that “

Megan  

“I went to Law school at Penn and he went to Law school at Marquette “

Ray

“I went to Uw-Milwaukee with a background in ASL,what is the difference

”

Megan  

“he always thinks I am better “

Ray  

“I know give it time “

Megan  

“my mother was always struck towards him”

Ray  

“why”

Megan  

“cause he’s Hard of hearing “

Ray  

“well maybe I can sign back and forth to him “

Megan  

“you have deaf family members “

Ray

“my Mother and my mother In-law”

Megan

“he tried taking ASL and tried being in the deaf community but everyone

rejected him”

Ray  

“yeah it can be a tough journey “

Megan phones ring  

Megan  

“I got take this “

Ray  

“you know Jerry needs a driver “

We approach Ray and his wife Jess ray is just tired after a long day and

writing a letter  

Jess  

“hey Darling “

Ray  

“hey”

Jess  

“what are you doing it’s almost midnight “

Ray  

“writing a letter to my mother “

Jess  

“read it for me “  

Ray  

“Hey mom it’s almost midnight and I don’t know why I am up it was a day like not many happen expect the state of Wisconsin got it’s wish when an inmate killed himself he deserved what happen to him , a 16 year old boy walking down the street he raped and murdered him I suppose I should feel great about the man’s death or bad or guilty I don’t know  “

Jess  

“don’t lie to Dorthey “

Ray  

“I am not trying to lie “

Jess  

“darling “

Ray just looks at his wife

We returned to the bar where Jerry and hank are playing pool Megan walks

in  

Hank  

“man, you guys should quit your job and join the pool team here “

Jerry  

“I like my job “

Hank  

“you do “

They laugh  

Megan walks in  

Hank  

“hey you know her “

Jerry  

“let me see “

Megan  

“you know me don’t play me”

Jerry  

“oh yes consular what’s up

Megan  

“Peter called me.”

Jerry  

“Peter? peter turned into a basketball.”

He sits his drinks down  

Jerry  

“Can I buy you a drink, Counselor?”  

Megan  

“No, thanks”.

Jerry  

“Okay

I got one for you.

Jerry  

“How come California has the most lawyers, and New Jersey has the most

toxic dumps? Because New Jersey got first pick.

You don't get it.”

Megan gives him the look  

Megan  

“Look, why don't you get your coat, and I'll drive you home?”  

Jerry  

“Home”

The drunk jerry keeps going

Jerry  

“Where in the car Where to? I used to know”.

Jerry and Megan in the car jerry is still talking  

Jerry  

“So, this morning really bummed you out.”

Do I look bummed out to you? You know, it wouldn't be so terrible.”

Megan looks over at jerry

Megan  

“What's that?”

Jerry  

“If you were my kid.”

Megan sort laughs it off  

Megan  

“I guess I should take that as a compliment.”

Jerry keeps rambling  

Jerry  

“Hey, you're smart, you're pretty, you got a good job, and you don't

hate my guts.”

Megan looks at her passenger

Megan  

“Jerry, I doubt your son hates you.”

Jerry sighs  

Jerry  

“No, you don't know. You don't know him.

I don't even know him. I never will”.

A car droved by drunk driver slams into Megan’s Car as it honks at her  

Ray (voice over)  

"A crowd of people stood and cheered when he raped him.

"They were supposedly good people, "and they didn’t do anything.

"Then he beat him to death with a baseball bat.

"And today the state of Wisconsin and the city of Milwaukee got its

revenge. "It's not enough, and it's not too much”

.

"  

Jerry just watched as he injured and a dead body lays in the car  

End of 1.8  

[firstpuffin]

Changing elements of existing characters; race, sex etc

I remember when the F4ntastic Four movie came out in 2015 (and seriously, F4ntastic? What is this, the 90’s again?) and we saw that the new Human Torch was… different. There was some concern, admittedly even from me, about this change. I mean, Johnny Storm is white, right? Why cast a black actor?

  Well I could have let that slide without issue as long as they explained, even with just one sentence to not take up too much time, why his sister is white and him black. Yes, there could be a hundred-score reasons why, but it is unintuitive. Since then I have grown up and don’t mind nearly so much, but this “issue” comes up again and again. The new Doctor in Doctor Who is a woman and there has been rumour about a black James Bond floating around for a while. My favourite superhero died and there was a fuss when he was replaced by a black kid; Tony Stark let a black girl replace him as Iron Man (or whatever name she went by) and there was a fuss both times. Are you seeing the pattern?

  Established heroes are being replaced by children!

  I’m kidding.

  But there is always a fuss when a beloved character is changed and I must admit, a black James Bond would bother me. A female James Bond would bother me; the first and least important reason is that James Bond is an established white male character and a lot of his stories would be different if he wasn’t. The other characters in his stories would treat him differently, he would have had different experiences and would not be the same person.

  More importantly though, it’s kind of insulting (not to me mind, I’m a white male) that people seem to think that the James Bond brand is what’s needed to carry a black or female lead. Seriously, we already know that’s not the case, so make a brand-new character who fits your criteria. If you have the rights then put them in the same world as James Bond, sure. That could be fun.

  A female Doctor doesn’t bother me because it works in-world; they established long ago that it was possible to regenerate into a different sex so it’s cool. It works.

  It’s just a shame the writing was crap. Fingers crossed for the 2020 series.

  There were rumours for a while that Spider-Man, no cross that, Peter Parker was going to be gay in an upcoming movie. This didn’t happen and I’m glad. I probably shouldn’t be but I am. See, I let a lot slide in comic book universes because there is the multiverse and as long as we don’t know which universe exactly the story is based in, there is nothing wrong with Peter being gay. But again, why not make a new character who happens to be gay?

  Isn’t it offensive to think that a gay Spider-Man has to be the original?

  This is where Miles Morales comes in. He’s not a black Peter Parker, he’s a brand-new character. And yes, you could say my above argument should apply here, after-all it’s still the Spider-Man brand. But Spider-Man is pretty unique in that there has generally only been Peter Parker. Yes there is Miguel O’Hara in the future and similar variants but many superhero mantles have been picked up by other characters, but Peter Parker is usually Spider-Man and no-one steps up to take his place if he dies or vanishes.

  Except maybe Ben Reilly, Peter’s clone.

  But even if he wasn’t unique, it wouldn’t matter. Do you know how many Spider-Women there have been? Including another of Peter’s clones?

  So when the Peter Parker of the Ultimate universe dies, Miles Morales comes along and tries to pick up the slack. This is just comic book tradition, and it works. I like Miles Morales. He brings a freshness to the Spider-Man story; seriously, screw Uncle Ben I want to see more Uncle Aaron.

  Speaking of Uncle Aaron, I was a fan of Prowler when it was still Hobie Brown under the mask, but multiverse so whatever.

  So changes thanks to the multiverse is cool, as is taking up another hero’s mantle. What else am I okay with? Well for starters, if something is done well.

  It seems a lot of Iron Man fans weren’t too happy with the Mandarin but, and maybe this is because I didn’t know a whole lot of Iron Man lore, I thought that the twist was amazing. That is how you do a trailer. They set up this mysterious terrorist (yawn) who was dominating the Middle East, only for that to be a façade for the real villain. As a twist this is not only amazing but was set up incredibly well.

  And then there is Michelle Jones from Spider-Man: Homecoming who we discover is MJ right at the end. She is quite possibly as far from the MJ we know as is possible but then again, she isn’t Mary-Jane Watson. I really like what they are doing here, using an established character whose relationship with the hero pops up in nearly every iteration, to hint at future sub-plots without actually being the same character.

 So I’ve been pretty positive about the idea of “changing” a character, so why am I bringing this up? Because it doesn’t matter how justified the change is, the execution can ruin it. Doctor Who is a prime example of this.

I was pretty excited to see a woman portray the Doctor because there is a lot in his (I use the male pronoun for a reason) character that you don’t often see in female characters. Matt Smith was amazing at portraying an old man in a young man’s body; he was a treat to watch. Tennant, Smith and Capaldi were all very good at showing a character who was old, who knew, and had experienced, far more than any human could match. He took the lead, got angry when he needed to and had a fire in his belly, a sliver of ice in his heart, usually hidden by a cheerful and possibly forced optimism.

  To see that kind of female character would be new and awesome.

  Instead we had infantile episodes more focused on preaching than actually telling a story. I don’t know if Whitaker can act, I don’t know if she is up to the job of being the Lonely God, because we didn’t get to see it. I’ve been watching the old episodes, by which I mean 1963 onwards and I’ve just revisited the 2005 onwards series’; two companions really has to be the maximum number of companions and if there is a third then they should be the Doctor’s equal. Otherwise the Doctor gets ignored.

  River Song was never just a companion and while you could say that her presence detracted from his, it was in a good way that allowed the characters to bounce off of each other. In series 11 with Whitaker we saw more of Ryan and Graham’s relationship than we did the Doctor herself, that is when they don’t pause the episode to dump exposition onto the viewers (I’m looking at you, episode 3).

  Of course as far as I’m concerned, the greatest sin occurred in the second episode: she gives up. The Doctor gives up. For no good goddamn reason. Okay so there is a reason. Her time-machine, which has been coming and going for centuries isn’t there at that very moment! She didn’t see it disappear, not to return for another hundred years; it just wasn’t there yet and she knew it was due any moment. What the fu-?!

  Who is this woman? Certainly not the Doctor who chases away fleets of spaceships with a speech.

-what a speech- 

  How about another example? You may have heard of Spider-Gwen (don’t worry she doesn’t actually go by that name, that would be stupid), her series is based on Earth-65 as opposed to the mainstream series which is Earth-616 (who numbers these?). I don’t want to talk about her, although I totally could. I like her and what they wanted to do, even if the execution was poor. No, I’m bringing up the Earth-65 Captain America: a black woman called Samantha Wilson.

  The agenda behind that can already be practically tasted but I prefer not to whine about such things and she seems okay as a character. My problem is that if she went through the same process as Steve Rogers, which she did, then why isn’t she ripped like Steve? Seriously, that guy is jacked in virtually every incarnation so why isn’t she? Because she’s a woman and thus her biology is different? I think it’s safe to say that that is BS and the only reason she isn’t covered in rippling muscle is because it wouldn’t look sexy.

-seriously? Trump is Modok? He’s even quoting Trump! Urgh, the taste of agendas-

  Men can be huge but women? Nope.

  I don’t mind Gwen not being massive, depending on the artist then Peter can be pretty skinny too. But double-standards much?

 I’m going to close up here. I don’t mind changes to established characters so long as it makes sense: taking up the mantle of a superhero, an alternate universe or possible in the established canon; I do however think that rather than changing an established character, a new character should be made. But while I often like to see these new (or sometimes “new”) characters, I will not force myself to like something if the execution is poor.

[typicalmidnight]

100 Questions

1.) Name Kaleea

2.) Where are you from? Canada

3.) How old are you? 13

4.) Do you have any siblings? yes, a younger brother

5.) Pets? an aquatic frog (i kinda hate it tho)

6.) Describe yourself um smart, funnyish, sarcastic 24/7

7.) What do you do for fun? read, watch youtube and netflix, sing

8.) Do you have a job? What do you do? nope i just go to school

9.) Have you had other jobs? i used to babysit?

10.) What’s your favorite memory? i have no freaking idea

11.) What is one thing you regret? so many things

12.) What is one thing you wish you would’ve done, but didn’t? tried out for my school musical

13.) One thing about yourself you wish you could change my hair cause i cut it and regret it so much

14.) What do you love about yourself? my singing voice

15.) Who inspires you? brooke sanchez, zendaya, emma watson, idk who else

16.) Do you collect anything? no?? i don’t think so lol

17.) Do you have any fears? SPIDERS

18.) Is there anything that annoys you about your job? uh homework?? lol

19.) Can you tell us a secret about yourself? 

20.) How about another secret? :)

21.) Favorite band? One Direction

22.) What music are you currently listening to? well currently as i’m writing this, i’m listening to Eyes Wide Open by Sabrina Carpenter. but in general lots of oldish pop from 2012-2016/17

23.) Do you have a favorite song? i don’t think so

24.) Do you have a favorite movie? ooooooh ummmm spiderman: homecoming at the moment i think

25.)What’s your favorite color? purpleeee

26.) What’s your favorite place you’ve ever been to? cuba!

27.) Ever broken a promise? i mean probably, small ones tho. wait actually tho this girl that i don’t really like told me her crush and made me promise not to tell anyone but i broke that one soooooo that was a mess. regret that a lot.

28.) Do you have a favorite book? harry potter and the deathly hallows

29.) What’s your favorite school subject? language (english)

30.) Least favorite school subject? GYM

31.) What’s your favorite food? sushi

32.) How about least favorite food? so many i have no idea

33.) What’s your favorite Holiday? Christmas!!!!

34.) What makes you mad? ahhhh so much but usually my brother

35.) What makes you happy? peter parker, reading, harry potter, brooke sanchez, music

36.) Do you have a favorite scent? no, but if i had to pick i would say vanilla

38.) Do you have a favorite TV show? uhhhhh full house maybe?

39.) Can you share an extremely embarrassing moment? once i punched my crush in the face by accident...

40.) When is a time you were extremely irritated? a few weeks ago i was under a lot of stress and my friend stole my earbuds but when she said she took them she seemed like she was lying and my anxiety levels were really high (i have diagnosed anxiety okay i’m not just saying that) and she was really stressing out and i was super mad at her. that’s long sorry. also super random.

41.) Is there anybody you hate? millie bobby brown (sorry y’all that like her) and this kid in my class.

42.) What do you look for in a person? a strong personality, funny, outgoing, nice, someone i can relate too

43.) How’s the weather? sucky it’s coldddd and even tho it’s winter there’s no snow even tho i’m in CANADA and like we usually get snow but there isn’t any so that’s making me kinda mad

44.) Are you currently in school? not at the moment, but yes, i do go to school

45.) What is your goal in life? to become a professional singer maybe??

46.) Is there something you should be doing, but keep putting off? homework, cleaning my room

47.) Ever been to a concert? yes, i saw johnny orlando and mackezie ziegler, and hayden summerall, brooke butler, and johnny orlando again

48.) What was the last movie you saw in theater? fantastic beasts: the crimes of grindelwald

49.) What was the last book you read? mockingjay (hunger games trilogy)

50.) What is your favorite season? fall

51.) Do you prefer it to be hot or cold? cold i guess but i hate both

52.) Do you prefer the sun, the rain, or snow? sun, but not too hot

53.) If you could go anywhere, where would you go? paris maybe

54.) Any current travel plans? nah but i wanna go to vidcon. i might go to flordia tho possibly to go to playlist live.

55.) Do you prefer day or night? idk

56.) Are you an introvert or extrovert? in👏tro👏vert👏

57.) What is something not many people know about you? i write fics, and i actually really love writing (nobody i know in real life knows this i don’t think)

58.) Where are you right now? my living room

59.) Look in front of you. What do you see? a blanket

60.) If you could meet one person, alive or dead, who would it be? does peter parker count?

61.) Would you rather look into your future, or fix something from your past? i honestly have no idea

62.) If you could sit down with anyone in the world, and talk to them for an hour, who would you like to speak with? zendaya

63.) What was the first CD you ever owned? i don’t own any

64.) What was the first CD you ever purchased with your own money? noneee

65.) If you own any Vinyls, which was your first? um none!

66.) How many CDs do you own? 0. nobody uses cds!

67.) What relaxes you? music

68.) Do you have any talents? singing?? idk sometimes i think i’m good at it, and others i think i’m terrible

69.) If you could give yourself the ability to do anything, what would it be? like a superpower?? um be a witch like hermione granger but without a wand. or combat my anxiety and ask out my crush (he would prob say no tho i’m pretty sure he doesn’t like me back)

70.) Favorite candy? gummies

71.) Is anything bothering you right now? i’m going to a new school soon i think and i’m hella nervous

72.) Are you happy with where you are in life right now? not really, the reason i’m going to a new school is actually because of my anxiety, so i’m upset with myself for letting it take this much control over me.

73.) Is there anyone you regret ever associating with? none that i can think of

74.) Do you have a favorite memory from your childhood? uh well one time i was eating ice cream in front of my tv when i was really little. that was fun.

75.) What is your least favorite memory from your childhood. when i was 3 i had a dream cookie monster was in my basement and he was trying to eat me. that traumatized me for years.

76.) Favorite memory of your parents? idk i have terrible memory i’m sorry

77.) Do you have a least favorite memory of your parents? again, terrible memory

78.) How is your relationship with your parents? um i’m closer with my mom than my dad, but there’s other stuff i shouldn’t get into on the internet

79.) What’s your family like? good? idk

80.) Are you clean or messy? messyyyy even tho i hate messiness

81.) What is your most recent purchase? books

82.) What’s the most amount of money you’ve spent at once? i have no idea

83.) What are you saving up for? vidcon tickets

84.) How much money do you have to your name currently? a lot? idk

85.) Have you ever done anything last minute? EVERYTHING

86.) What’s the furthest in advance you’ve planned something? nothing i’m terrible at planning

87.) Are you an introvert or Extrovert? you already asked this?? in👏tro👏vert👏

88.) What’s the latest you’ve ever been out of your house? 5 am?? maybe??? i have no idea

89.) Cats or Dogs? D👏O👏G👏S👏 (i’m not against cats, just not a cat person)

90.) How long have you gone without sleep? like the longest? 22 hours i think. currently tho like 5 hours i woke up late cause i’m sick

91.) What were you like as a child? shyyyyy but also very loud if i was comfortable

92.) What do you miss from your childhood? the innocence you have when you’re a child, and not having drama all the time

93.) Do you have a favorite memory from work? i don’t workkkkkkk. but from school, we went on a trip to Washington DC and that was cool.

94.) What’s the scariest thing that’s ever happened to you? I almost got hit by a car once? (but like i almost did no joke my friend saved me tho) (happens to be the same friend who stole my earbuds)

95.) What’s a bad habit that you have? biting my nails oof

96.) What are your plans for the summer? uhhhhhhhh

97.) What was the last thing that made you happy? writing these answers

98.) What was the last picture you took on your phone? screenshot of the new spider-man trailer!!!

99.) Who was the last person you texted and why? my friends, because i was super excited about the new trailer

100.) Send me your own questions in the ask box!

[stories-and-other-fun-things]

Assassin Cain

Part 3 (Final Part)

He arrived in Paris just a few hours before the sun was going to set and it was pouring down with rain.

"Going to be a wet murder then." He muttered under his breath then started to head off to the location he was given of the Crusader. After a few minutes of searching Cain realised he was being followed by three men. He saw an alleyway and began walking down it and sure enough the three men followed him. 

"Fuck..." He muttered under his breath because the alley stopped at a wall and went no further. He drew his sword and wrapped his chain around it and got ready. One of the men drew two swords, one drew a shotgun and the other drew a double headed axe. The man with the double headed axe. was Cain's target, meaning they were all Crusaders. 

"Johnny, go first. Then you Rick. And if the both of you fail he's mine." Cain's target told his lackeys. Johnny had the two swords. They circled each other until Johnny tried to strike at Cain's head. Cain dived out of the way and slashed down Johnny's right leg which made him cry out in pain. Cain then turned, ran, jumped and plunged his sword straight through Johnny's neck rendering him dead. Cain then threw his sword at Rick who didn't react fast enough and copped Cain's sword to his chest. Cain flicked his wrist and pulled the chain which bought his sword back to him.

"That's quite a neat idea..." He thought then turned to face his target. The target ran and swung at Cain which narrowly missed him and got lodged into a brick wall. Cain saw the opportunity and took it. He raised his sword and bring it down on his target's hands, slicing them off in a bloody mess. The target fell to the ground screaming in pain. Cain raised his sword once more and took off the head of his target. He looked around him, then he realised what the guild were actually doing.

"It's not saving lives! It's a gang war! Between The Assassins Guild and The Crusaders! Daniels was an asset to The Crusaders! That's why they wanted me to take him down! I've been doing their dirty work, but no more! I need to find Laura." He said out loud to himself, sheathed his sword then sprinted out of the alleyway and began running to the helicopter. He stopped when he heard a woman cry out for help.

 He spun around quickly searching for the source of her voice. He looked down another alleyway to see a woman being beaten up by two guys. He ran down that alley. He got close then shouted at the two men. They turned to face them with hatred burning on their faces.

"Uhh, bonjour?" Cain said.

"Tuons ce fils de pute. (Let's kill this motherfucker)." One said to the other.

"Il a vraiment besoin d'être enseigné une leçon. (He definitely needs to be taught a lesson)." The other said then began advancing on Cain. He jump kicked one, then turned to the other and kicked him in the rib age. The first one got up only to be thrown into a wall. The other one lunged at Cain, but he kneed him in the face then slammed him into a wall as well. They were both unconscious. He helped the woman up.

"Vous parlez français? (You speak French)." She asked him. Cain just blankly stared at her. "English then?"

"English." He replied.

"You said 'bonjour' and that made me think you were French."

"Oh."

"Yeah... Thank you so much for saving me by the way. I'm Felicity Sparks."

"Cain Shadow, but I'm sorry because I really have to be somewhere else."

"Ok then." Cain turned and sprinted out of the alleyway. He got to where the helicopter dropped him off, but it was no longer there.

"You know..." Felicity said from behind him.

"Holy fuck!" He said and spun.

"You could borrow my helicopter if you want to get out of the country, just as long as I can come." 

"Only death follows me to where I'm going."

"I get attacked here every day, so I don't really give a shit. Just please let me leave Paris."

"Well I do need a 'copter..."

"Alright, this way." He followed his new friend to her helicopter and flew off to Colorado to find Laura.

 Upon arriving Cain received a distress message from her.

"Cain! I need help! I'm being followed by cops and Crusaders!" He found the location and went to it.

"Stay here, and only move the chopper if you get attacked." He told Felicity and she nodded. He ran to Laura who was outside a very tall building. The cops weren't that far off in the distance. They ran into the building and up the stairs. Cain saw a parachute and trapped it as they were going up the stairs. Laura didn't see the parachute only Cain did.

 They ran to the rooftop of the building with the Police a little bit behind them. They reached the roof and instantly recognised their problem, there was no way down! Cain ran over to the edge, looked down, then ran backed to Laura and turned back to face the edge.

"What are you thinking of doing?" She asked.

"Something ill advised." He said then ran and jumped off the building just before the Police got onto the rooftop. He was falling fast but still managed to hear Laura shout this: "Shoot him you fuckers! Axel, Johnny and Rick didn't achieve their goals to kill him! So fucking shoot him in the head before he thinks of something smart!" 

"Traitorous bitch!" He shouted then pulled the cord. He landed on the road, detached the parachute then ran to the helicopter. He jumped in the helicopter and told Felicity to head to the address of the headquarters immediately.

"What about your friend?" She asked.

"She can burn in the deepest abyss of Hell!" He said angrily.

"Ok then..." Felicity said then started the helicopter up and headed to the headquarters. They landed outside and ran in.

"PETER!" Cain shouted at the top of his voice. Peter ran down to them.

"What?" He asked.

"You should have told me that we weren't saving people! We were only fighting in a gang war! Well this ends now!" The roller door to the building blew up as Cain finished his sentence and Laura, along with a bunch of Crusaders, walked in.

"Oh indeed Cain, this does end now. This ends with the death of all of you." Laura said.

"You're a..." Axel began.

"What? A traitor? No. I've been with the Crusaders two years more than I have been with you. I was a mole. But I'm not the only one." Six members of The Assassins Guild walked over to Laura and The Crusaders. Which made it seventeen against eleven. "So, who wishes to be the first one to go? Either join us now or die. Choose."

"I speak for all of us, we will never join you." Peter said.

"Alright then," She turned to her team, "Cain's mine." And that's when the gun fight started. Cain gave Felicity one of his guns, some extra ammo, then began killing some of The Crusaders until he made it to Laura. He only killed three Crusaders, but his sword was already dripping with blood. He walked towards Laura, but stopped a few paces in front of her when she pulled her gun out and aimed it at his head.

"It doesn't have to be this way Shadow. We've known each other since birth. Join me, we could rule the world together." She said.

"This is the path I have chosen Laura, and I'm about to break away from it and live a life where I'm not ending the lives of other people." Cain replied. His right hand was in his pocket, while his left was still clutching his sword. Unbeknownst to Laura his right hand was gripping his deck of cards getting ready to throw them at her.

"So does that mean you won't join me?"

"Correct."

"Such talent you have, but you wasted it with them. It could have reached its potential with us. Looks like I'll just have to kill you along with your talent." Her finger began to push down on the trigger, and that's when Cain threw his cards at her. They all went in different directions. Some cut her face, some sliced at her legs and the others sliced her gun hand which made her drop the gun. Cain dropped his sword and ran at her. He grabbed her and threw her against the wall. She hit the ground in pain and Cain approached with his gun in hand. She rolled her head to look at him.

"Do it." She told him.

"I won't kill you." 

"What?!" He said nothing, raised the gun and shot. Laura's right kneecap exploded, and she screamed out in pain. Cain collected his cards, sword and other things then flew away in Felicity's helicopter with her.

 (8 years later)

Cain and Felicity lived a happy life together. They married four years ago, and they were as happy as they could be. One day Felicity asked Cain something as they laid on the couch together watching TV.

"You never told me why." She said.

"Why what?"

"Why you didn't kill her when you had the chance."

"I didn't kill her because killing her would have gotten rid of The Crusaders, meaning I was still part of a gang war. Also, I didn't kill her because that's when I wanted to start my new life which doesn't involve killing anybody anymore."

"Oh. That kinda does make sense."

"Laura probably thought that our friendship kept her alive. But that friendship ended when I jumped off the roof and she ordered the cops to attempt to kill me."

"I kept an ear out, and I haven't heard anything about her since we escaped eight years ago. I wonder if she's trying to track you down."

"I hope not, because if she tracks me or you down then I think that is when her time will be up. Who knows what happened to her. Personally, I don't want to know. But I reckon she is already six feet under." Cain was wrong about Laura. She was not six feet under. She has been lying in wait and slowly rebuilding The Crusaders. Except that shot to her kneecap really fucked her up somehow and she was driven insane. Insane enough to saw her own leg off. But anyway, Laura was waiting for the most opportune moment to strike with her Crusaders.

As I previously stated, I am not proud of this story and nor do I plan on making a sequel. Also, I tend to blab on in my endings so yeah

[analogscum]

HELLS ANGELS ON WHEELS (1967, d. Richard Rush)

Way back in 1966, before he was reduced to a Johnny Depp caricature and the personal hero of that one libertarian douchebag in your college Philosophy 101 class, Hunter S. Thompson burst onto the literary scene with his debut book, Hell’s Angels: The Strange and Terrible Saga of the Outlaw Motorcycle Gang. Expanded from a 1965 article for The Nation, Hell’s Angels introduced America to not only the Doctor’s freewheeling, lysergic brand of prose, but this new underground culture of the motorcycle gang. No longer the leather-bound toughs of The Wild Ones, these bikers were hairier, freakier, and ten times more drugged up. They didn’t even bother to ask what you had for them to rebel against, they let their chains to the talkin’, maaaaaaan.

Hells Angels on Wheels roared into movie theaters the following year, when the Summer of Love had cooled down into the Winter of…I guess still Love? I dunno. I imagine the film must’ve been very shocking in its day and age, but for today’s viewer, Hells Angels on Wheels is notable for other reasons, namely its nascency. It represents ground zero for an entire sub-genre which played a major part in cementing the explosion of creativity that was American cinema in the 1970s, and provided a launching pad for a number of players who would go on to become indispensable cornerstones of that scene. But, before they could do that, they had to shoot a bunch of establishing shots of bikes parking in places.

In the spirit of the Peace movement, why don’t we be generous and describe the narrative structure of Hells Angels on Wheels as…episodic? Yeah, that’s the ticket! Basically every scene in the movie follows this structure: the Hells Angels show up somewhere and park their bikes for like five minutes, go into a place where everyone hates them, get into a fight with the people who hate them, then leave when either they kill someone or the cops show up. That’s it. That’s the whole movie. The audience’s surrogate is a young man named Poet, who quits his job at a gas station when a customer is a total jerk to him. Then his bike gets sideswiped by one of the Angels, who has, shall we say, questionable facial hair. Either this guy’s mustache just grows weird, or they did a terrible makeup job on him, anyway, you be the judge:  

So Poet’s headlight is damaged, and he proceeds to start a fight with the Angel with the questionable facial hair. Now, instead of just beating him to death with some wrenches, the lead Angel, Buddy, appreciates Poet’s ability to scrap. They all hang out for awhile. They get into a fight in a bar with a rival biker gang. They get into a fight at a carnival with some sailors. Then they all go back to a swingin’ pad full of groovy wall decor and have a drug orgy for what feels like nine hours. At one point, a painter who looks and talks suspiciously like Hunter S. Thompson — floppy hat, sunglasses, gruff mumble — begins doing body paint on all the women, which takes up roughly six hours of this nine hour scene. But most importantly, Poet falls for Shrill, one of the biker mamas who he can tell is a little too smart to be around this scene, because so is he. Just one problem: Shrill is Buddy’s woman. I’m sure this won’t lead to awkward, poorly choreographed violence at all!

Speaking of, kudos to the filmmakers for going for realism; there’s a lot of handheld camerawork, plenty of Nouvelle Vague-influenced jump cuts, and the film seems to feature quite a few actual Hells Angels. In fact, Sonny Barger, the president of the Angels’ Oakland chapter, gets his own title card in the opening credits, even though he appears on camera for less than two seconds. Surely this title was properly earned, and not the result of any threats against studio people with switchblades. However, we’re talking about an era where filmmakers still hadn’t quite figured out how to properly choreograph a fight scene, so every scuffle still kinda looks like drunken acrobatics. And the death scenes are even worse. Here’s a short list of how people die in this movie: they’re awkwardly knocked down and punched once; their car is run off the road but otherwise totally unharmed; and their bike runs into a two by four, slowly tilts over, and catches on fire for no discernible reason. It’s a shame that the one thing that reads as hokey in a movie dedicated to portraying the reality of this violent lifestyle is, well, the violence.

Eventually Poet is made a “prospect” by Buddy, and the whole gang hits the road. One of the bikers and his woman get married at a Catholic Church in Nevada. There are more fights with people who don’t like them. In once scene a biker drives his bike up a real tall hill for awhile. One biker gets arrested on a murder beef, but the gang busts him loose less than a minute later, because stakes or tension is for squares, I guess. By far the most interesting part of this movie is watching the relationship between Poet and Shrill develop, and how that begins to threaten Buddy. These two are joined together by their discontent: they both want something outside of the ordinary from life, but are paralyzed by their self-destructive tendencies. This is especially true of Shrill, who isn’t happy unless she is causing unhappiness all around her, which leads her to play Poet and Buddy off of one another, until it all blows up in a powerful final confrontation that is unfortunately capped off by a truly stupid coda that never should’ve happened.

Hells Angels on Wheels was directed by a gentleman named Richard Rush. Though he wouldn’t be as prolific after the sixties, and hasn’t directed a feature film since 1994’s Color of Night (speaking of truly stupid codas that never should’ve happened), this film helped propel him to greater artistic heights: 1970’s Getting Straight was a critical darling and called the “best American film of the decade” by none other than Ingmar Bergman; 1974’s Freebie and the Bean was a box office smash and more or less invented the buddy cop movie; and 1980’s The Stunt Man earned him two Oscar nominations. Richard Rush has kinda been forgotten these days, but, I mean, François Truffaut called this guy his favorite American director. Have YOU ever been François Truffaut’s favorite anything? I doubt it, he’s been dead since 1984, genius.

Eagle-eyed viewers may have noticed that the cinematography on Hells Angels on Wheels was credited to one “Leslie Kovacs.” If you’re a hopeless dork like me, you probably whispered to yourself, “I bet that’s Lázló Kovacs.” Well, fellow hopeless dork, we were both right: this was one of Kovacs’s first American feature jobs, after shooting commercials and nature documentaries for much of the early sixties. He continued to collaborate with Rush throughout the seventies, as well as lensing classic films by the likes of Peter Bogdanovich, Bob Rafelson, Martin Scorsese, Dennis Hopper, and Norman Jewison. Shockingly, he never won an Oscar, but odds are if you paint a mental picture of American cinema in the seventies, you’re imagining an image shot by Lázló Kovacs.

That finally brings us to Poet, who was played by a young upstart named Jack Nicholson. Is it even necessary to point out that he’s the best actor in the film? Well, he is. The character is a bit underwritten, but he makes the most out of it. Nicholson can do more with a smile or a glance than other actors in the film attempt with an entire monologue. Best of all, he still hadn’t gone full on bug-eyed, jive talkin’, scenery chewin’, Lakers court side Jaaaaaaaack yet. There’s a vulnerable, wounded quality to his acting here that is incredibly compelling, I would argue that he perfected it in Five Easy Pieces, one of yours truly’s favorite films of all time, before moving on to the more ostentatious work that would net him 3 Oscars and turn him into a tabloid playboy.

Hells Angels on Wheels would help establish the counterculture motorcycle gang as a cinematic force to be reckoned with, at least on the drive-in circuit. More quick and dirty films of that ilk followed in its wake, such as The Wild Angels, Born Losers, and Hells Angels ’69, before one such film broke on through to the other side: an acid-soaked exploration that pitted the battle between the bikers and normal society as the struggle for the very soul of America in the Vietnam age. Oh, and they brought Kovacs and Nicholson along too. Obviously I’m talking about Otto Preminger’s Skidoo.

Nah, just kidding, I’m talking about Easy Rider. Released in 1969, the film proved to be the flashpoint for the most artistically fertile decade in the history of American cinema. And to think, it all may not have happened if it wasn’t for a little movie that’s mostly establishing shots of bikes being parked.

[justanothercinemaniac]

Epic Movie (Re)Watch #218 - Corpse Bride

Spoilers Below

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: Yes.

Do I remember it: Yes.

Did I see it in theaters: No.

Format: Blu-ray

1) Credits read, “A Laika Entertainment Production.”

Huh, the more you know.

2) We understand Victor as a character perfectly after our first encounter with him. He’s shown to be observant, quiet, a little timid, and longing for a sense of freedom (like when he lets the butterfly go). It’s a simple intro which will help carry his character throughout the film.

3) Even before “According to Plan” there’s this tracking shot through Victor’s community which establishes the rigidness/emptiness of his world VERY well. But just because this is a cold world doesn’t mean it’s unimaginative.

4) “According to Plan”

The opening number of the film (while no “This is Halloween”) does a lot of things well. For one, it sets up the context. We understand what is about to happen and why it is about to happen (to a point), we are given exposition in a sleek and entertaining way which isn’t always easy to do. But beyond that it sets up the soul of Victor’s soul. Or, more pointedly, its LACK of soul. The dreariness, the class conflict, the bleakness of it. But not in a way where you want to turn the movie off, which is important. All in all, it’s a strong opening number.

5)

Victoria: “What if Victor and I don’t like each other?”

Mrs. Everglot: “Huff! As if that has anything to do with marriage.”

6) The art style of this film is wicked strong, specifically with character design. By pushing the boundaries of human anatomy and design we get a base understanding of many characters (major and minor) that can be built off of in the future. My favorite is the Everglot’s butler with his permanently upturned nose.

7) The piano solo.

I think this is the strongest instrumental piece in the film and largely works as to show what makes Victor and Victoria unique. It is incredibly pleasant, lively, and romantic. There’s a beauty to the melody which lives within both these characters which just is not present in their world. All in all, its a beautiful piece.

8) The piano in this scene is a Harryhausen, as in Ray Harryhausen who was a pioneer of stop motion animation.

9) Both Johnny Depp as Victor and Emily Watson as Victoria are wonderful in their respective voice over roles. They each are very similar, having a timidness/quietness which is only endearing and interesting early on. But as the film progresses each is able to naturally push the characters’ emotions and boldness. Each is still unique, however, not a clone of the other. They just work best when paired.

10) This film thrives in its simplicity. It tells the story it needs to quickly and efficiently, working more as a macabre fairytale than anything else. That simplicity (which can be seen in the inciting incident of Victor awakening the titular bride) is the movie’s most endearing quality.

11) There’s a nice sense of humor to this film, possibly best seen in the Town Cryer.

12) So Emily (the corpse bride) acts all innocent like she didn’t KNOW Victor doesn’t want to be with her. But if when you first meet your husband and he’s running away from you in panic doesn’t that tell you something?

13) The after life.

One of the things I like most about this film is the juxtaposition between the after life and the living world. From a design element, the expected tropes are flipped on their heads. Its the living world which is bleak and dull while the after life is INCREDIBLY lively. The color and art style gives it a fun sensibility which I just really appreciate, helping you get invested in the fantasy elements of this film.

14) “Remains of the Day”

Honestly, this is the best song in the entire film. It does a number of things CRAZY well, both giving us Emily’s backstory in a sleek way while also developing how the after life (in this world) is not something to be feared. This one lyric in particular PERFECTLY defines this film’s afterlife:

“Die, die, we all pass away. You might cry now but it’s really okay! You might try to hide and you might run away but we all end up the remains of the day!”

More than anything else the high energy of the song (supported by Danny Elfman’s vocals and composition) are what make it such an incredible tune. It’s just so freaking fun!

15) While important to the rest of the film, I always found the surface world’s plot line kind of dull. I like Victoria and her development, but I am WAY more interested in what’s going on with Emily. So anytime we cut away I’m just waiting to get back to the afterlife of the film.

16) Helena Bonham Carter as the titular corpse bride, Emily.

Holy freaking cow, this role. Holy freaking cow, Helena Bonham Carter IN this role. Emily could have easily been a flat archetype, a mythical figure presented in the story. But easily she is the liveliest character in the entire film (poetic, isn’t it?). She is kinda, loving, optimistic, funny, innocent but not naive, hopeful, occasionally scary, and just really freaking interesting all around! Bonham Carter blends all these characteristics beautifully in her vocal work, making you forget that you are in fact listening to an actress. She’s Emily, through and through. It is by far one my favorite performances of the actress, even if it is just a voice over.

17) I like how this film totally glosses over the fact that EMILY CAN TALK TO DOGS! Like, the spiders and maggots at least speak her language. BUT THE DOG JUST BARKS!

18) I always really liked Elder Gutknecht, but I’m not sure why. I think Michael Gough’s charming vocals are definitely a contributing factor, but there’s this chemistry and energy to him that I’ve just always been invested in.

19) Fun fact, the voice of the maggot is based on famous horror actor Peter Lorre!

20) One thing the film does that I do like is that Victor and Victoria WANT to be together. Yes their marriage is arranged but they actually end up connecting with/caring for each other, which is a nice twist on the way these marriages are usually handled in films. I’m not saying I think we should have more arranged marriages, but I just like this film went a different direction than normal with it.

21)

Victor: “Victoria!”

Victoria: “Victor?”

(GIF originally posted by @shr3k-love)

22) “Tears to Shed”

This song works on two different levels: in one way it is a fun, upbeat, positive analysis of Emily as a character (what makes her unique and lovable); in another way it is a sad, heartbreaking reflection of Emily’s grief. The fact that both elements are able to lend so naturally and change tones so well is a testament not only to Danny Elfman’s skills as a composer but the filmmaking team as a whole.

23) This is a delightfully old school line.

Pastor [asking about the living marrying the dead]: “A grim topic for a bride to be.”

Victoria: “’Tis a bride I fear.”

24) Roll credits!

Victoria: “He has a CORPSE BRIDE!”

25) Okay, so Victoria’s parents set up Lord Barkis with their daughter once Victor disappears. But 1) don’t they think they’re RELATED to Lord Barkis (and that’s why he showed up to the wedding) and 2) if they’re marrying for cash, wouldn’t they want to know that Lord Barkis HAS money beforehand?

26) I like that Victoria’s nanny Hildegard acts in many ways like a true mother to her, definitely much more so than Mrs. Everglot. They’re small moments of connection and support through the film, but I appreciate them.

27) Victor deciding to stay with Emily in death is a strong character choice. Having a passive protagonist is boring and he easily could’ve been poisoned by another character, but him making that choice (and how it speaks to where he is in the film) is great.

28) I like how all these lost connections are rekindled when the dead revisit the world of the living. It’s a nice, natural outcome to the idea of the dead returning to earth.

29) Similar to note #27, Emily’s decision to not go through the marriage is strong. Because SHE’S the one most invested in it. Victor is largely doing it FOR HER. So the fact she decides to stop it, to end it, speaks greatly to her selflessness and her wonderful heart.

30)

Lord Barkis [to Emily]: “But, but…I left you!”

Emily: “For dead.”

(GIF originally posted by @reactiongifs)

Honestly, I saw that coming a mile away the first time I watched this movie. But so what? It’s still fun!

31) I don’t LOVE the climactic sword fight between Victor and Lord Barkis, it’s just fine. But I will say when Emily holds the sword it’s freaking awesome!

32) Barkis’ death is also wonderfully creepily handled.

33) I love Emily’s ascension. A parallel to Victor setting the butterfly free at the film’s beginning, it is not only a great bookend but a wonderful happy ending.

Corpse Bride is really a treat. Director Tim Burton is in his element with this delightfully charming and imaginative macabre fairytale. The design is wonderful, the voice acting is strong, and its just a really sweet treat (especially around Halloween). I definitely recommend it.

[vinayv224]

The future of the Senate majority could hinge on two Georgia runoffs 

Sen. Kelly Loeffler, Rev. Raphael Warnock, Sen. David Perdue and Jon Ossoff. | Justin Sullivan; Jessica McGowan; Tom Williams/CQ-Roll Call; Paras Griffin via Getty Images

It will take about two more months to know which party controls the Senate.

The battle for control of the US Senate could come down to Georgia.

Both of Georgia’s Senate races will go to a runoff election to be held on January 5, 2021. With a small number of votes still to be counted in Georgia, particularly in the Democratic-leaning Atlanta suburbs, Republican Sen. David Perdue did not hit the 50 percent threshold he needed to avoid a runoff race with Democrat Jon Ossoff.

As of 7 pm ET on November 5, Perdue was sitting at 49.89 percent, compared to 47.80 percent for Ossoff, according to Decision Desk.

That’s runoff No. 2 for Georgia voters. That result has already been determined for the race between Republican Sen. Kelly Loeffler and Democrat Rev. Raphael Warnock in the special election for a Senate seat vacated in 2019 by retiring Sen. Johnny Isakson. That special election initially featured 20 candidates in an all-party “jungle primary,” so a runoff was all but guaranteed.

Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images

Sen. Kelly Loeffler speaks to her supporters in Atlanta, Georgia, on November 3.

Jessica McGowan/Getty Images

Rev. Raphael Warnock arrives at his campaign’s election night event in Atlanta on November 3.

At first glance, this might be a surprise for national political observers. Georgia has a long history of being conservative. Even though it has elected statewide Democrats more recently than some of its Southern peers, they were often conservative white Democratic men.

But Georgia has the potential to flip for former Vice President Joe Biden and Sen. Kamala Harris, and now they have a shot at not one but two Democrats making competitive runs for the Senate.

“Democrats are going to be very excited in Georgia but also nationally,” University of Georgia political science professor Charles Bullock told Vox. “Ossoff and Warnock, any kind of resource or help they need, they’re going to get.”

Senate Democrats are still a few seats short of a Senate majority, but the fact that both Senate races in Georgia will go to a runoff means the battle for control of the Senate is not over just yet.

All eyes — and all fundraising dollars — are about to shift to Georgia for the next two months.

Why Georgia is so competitive this year

A traditionally Republican Southern state, Georgia has become more competitive for Democrats year after year.

“Counties and suburbs of Atlanta are moving at light speed away from Republicans,” said Cook Political Report Senate editor Jessica Taylor, who rates both Georgia races as toss-ups. “Trump has accelerated a more natural evolution, but that has made it hard.”

Atlanta’s diversifying suburbs were already worrisome for Republicans before 2020, but they appear to be the epicenter of Democratic strength this year. The GOP is also watching as existing trends are being hastened by a combination of white suburban voters moving away from Trump and increased turnout among Black voters.

The metro Atlanta area is booming, and a lot of people moving there are young and diverse. Increasingly, they’re voting Democratic.

Between 2010 and 2019, the area’s population grew from about 5.3 million people to more than 6 million, according to data from the US Census Bureau, reported by Curbed. That growth put the Atlanta metro area fourth in growth nationwide, behind Houston, Dallas, and Phoenix (Senate seats in Texas and Arizona were also considered Democratic targets this year).

“Every area in metro Atlanta is growing,” state Rep. Angelika Kausche, a Democrat, recently told Vox. “People come here for the education, for the schools, for the quality of life.” That has brought legions of diverse, younger voters to Atlanta’s metro area.

As the New York Times recently reported, “white residents now make up fewer than three in five voters in Georgia, and a wave of migration to the Atlanta area over the past decade has added roughly three quarters of a million people to the state’s major Democratic stronghold.”

Amid the influx to the Atlanta suburbs, political observers in Georgia have been watching elections get closer and closer. In the 2018 governor’s race, Democrat Stacey Abrams lost to then-Secretary of State Brian Kemp by a little more than 50,000 votes — a scare for Georgia Republicans. Still, Perdue’s campaign believes the Republican’s ability to draw more votes will boost him in the runoff.

“Perdue will finish this election in first place with substantially more votes than his Democrat opponent,” Perdue campaign manager Ben Fry said. “Currently, Perdue’s lead is double the margin of defeat that Stacey Abrams faced for governor just two years ago.”

John Bazemore/AP

Sen. David Perdue speaks to supporters in Atlanta on November 2.

Jessica McGowan/Getty Images

Jon Ossoff waves to supporters on November 3 in Atlanta.

The runoff could prove difficult for Democrats to win; the party’s strategy in Southern states like Georgia involved harnessing the large voter turnout that typically accompanies presidential elections. It could be hard for the candidates to muster the same level of enthusiasm for these runoff elections, which has often given Republicans the edge in past years.

“We haven’t had many general runoffs. The one constant has been Republicans won all of them,” Bullock told Vox. “Republicans have done a better job of getting their voters back to the polls.”

But, he added, “There being two high-profile runoffs, this may help Democrats get their voters out.”

Abrams’s group Fair Fight and other voting rights groups like the New Georgia Project have been putting a ton of effort into registering and turning out Black voters at high rates this year. The state has already hit record registration levels, with about 7.6 million voters registered. And since early voting started, more than 2.7 million voters have cast ballots — at least 1 million of whom were Black.

“Georgia has by far the largest percentage of Black voters of any battleground state,” Abrams told Vox in a recent email interview.

Where the battle for control of the Senate stands

Georgia represents the narrowest of paths for Democrats to flip the Senate, and it could still be a tricky feat to pull off.

The North Carolina Senate race between Republican Sen. Thom Tillis and his Democratic challenger Cal Cunningham has also not been called and likely won’t be before November 12, which is the final date for mail-in ballots postmarked by Election Day to be received in that state. Votes are also still being counted in the Republican-leaning state of Alaska, which also has a contested Senate race (albeit one that Republicans are favored to win).

Democrats needed a net gain of three seats to flip the Senate to blue if Biden wins, which is looking more likely. The race for the Senate came down to 10 or so competitive races, but Republican incumbents won the vast majority of them.

As expected, Democrats lost Sen. Doug Jones’s seat in Alabama and flipped a Republican seat in Colorado. Democrats hung on to vulnerable incumbent Gary Peters’s seat in Michigan and are expected to flip another seat in Arizona, although Vox’s partner Decision Desk hasn’t yet called that race. Longtime Maine Sen. Susan Collins (R) won her race for reelection, a major blow to Democrats’ hopes of flipping the majority.

Megan Varner/Getty Images

Georgia represents the narrowest of paths for Democrats to flip the Senate; it could be a very tricky feat to pull off.

Democrats can afford to lose North Carolina only if they flip both Georgia seats. But it’s worth repeating just how tough this could be. Throughout the year, Democrats saw North Carolina as more competitive for them than Georgia. Even though Perdue hasn’t avoided a runoff, he has more votes than Ossoff. And runoff elections historically have been worse for Democrats because turnout will likely be lower than a high-turnout presidential election.

“If overtime is required when all of the votes have been counted, we’re ready, and we will win,” Perdue campaign manager Fry said in a statement.

Ossoff’s campaign also released a defiant statement on Thursday.

“The votes are still being counted, but we are confident that Jon Ossoff’s historic performance in Georgia has forced Senator David Perdue to continue defending his indefensible record of unemployment, disease, and corruption,” Ossoff campaign manager Ellen Foster said.

The race in Georgia isn’t over yet.

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