#btw it is impossible for you to bother me with Sparks asks!

[thenwethrowitonthefire]

when do I get to sing "MY WAY"??

Thank you for putting time and answer these, hopefully I'm not bothering you with them.

"No, no use in taking their time, or in wasting two dimes, on a call to God knows who... When all you feel is the rain, and it's hard to be vain, when no person looks at you -- so just be gracious and wait in the queue."

I think you'll have seen the official music video, so I'll treat you to one of my favourite performances of this song. This was performed at a very special celebratory show with a big orchestra, truly a time of them having gotten to sing "their way". If that doesn't fill the hearts of all of us who can relate with warmth and bring us hope, I don't know what does 💕 It was so beautiful. (I fear the lights in the hall won't come across in the video, but I really loved when the orchestra swelled up and the disco ball started spinning. Covering the entire audience in the tiny specs of light.)

When Do I Get To Sing "My Way" (live in London with the Heritage Orchestra, 2014)

On a somewhat related subject, I don't know if you've found it yet, but have you heard the song Change? If you resonate with When Do I Get To Sing "My Way", I think you might like what Change has to say, too :) There's two versions of it: one from 1985 and one from 1997. I can't tell you which is my favourite, because it's both. I'll give you the 1997 version here as it's orchestral.

[Please don't run away screaming because of the album cover -- there's a good reason they were photoshopped to look like beefy dudes for this cover. But this reply here is just about highlighting a specific song, so perhaps you'll enjoy reading the lyrics while you listen. I've pasted a small part of the lyrics below the video.]

Change (from the album Plagiarism, 1997)

"The rain is pouring down. I feel like a dog that's been kicked out into the street. I know that dogs can't drive cars. But that's about the only difference between us now.

But wait, there's a rainbow across the freeway, and I think I feel the morning sun. Another song is number one. Golden days have just begun.

Change, every dog is gonna have his day. Change, every loser's gonna have his way. Change, I don't care what other people say."

[tarithenurse]

Spark - 17

Fandom: Enn Enn no Shouboutai / Fire Force. Pairing: Shinmon Benimaru x fem!reader. Content: Suffering, but not in a bad way as such. Lots of pining and fluff. And...something else. A/N: Totally giving up on proofing at the moment because my brain is kinda spazzing on me. Oh yeah, so I totally headcanon Konro as Ace, btw. Feel free to ASK (or reblog) for tag – in fact: always reblog. Thanks to those who have already <3

17. Explosion

…   Konro   …

”Just tell her already!” he groans as he slides the goya off to the side.

Konro has spent the last month watching the youngsters stealing glances and lingering in each other’s presence, and sure, it was cute and innocent at first. Now, however, it’s becoming increasingly frustrating because they each come to him with their worries.

A loud thunk is the only clue needed to warn the cook that his friend has dropped his head onto the table. “I caaaan’t,” Benimaru complains, “she thinks I’m an idiot.”

“Rather that than a coward.” Knock your head onto that table a few times more, kid, it might kick start your brain.

It’s impossible to decipher the mumbled response and Konro really doesn’t want a clarification. After all, he has already heard all of it. Why do they even come to me? Being their friend is one thing, but while Konro would go to the end of the world for them (especially for Beni) he doesn’t really have much experience on the subject of dating.

“Konrooo...” the lad tries, “maybe you could -”

“No.”

“But you don-”

“Yes, I know what you want to ask and the answer is no.” There’s no way Konro is going to be stuck as a negotiator between those two. Both are stubborn, emotional, and smitten to the point that they can’t see clearly. “But if you don’t get your ass together, then I won’t cook for you anymore.”

“You can’t do that!”

Benimaru has always viewed the other man as calm and level-headed, someone who always manages to think before acting. Where Beni can lose his temper easily, Konro never shouts or gets truly angry. But eventually, even the strongest patience can be worn down.

“Boy!” Konro whips around to face him, sharp knife clutched in his hand. “Don’t test me. Stop whining like a baby and go tell her how you feel. Now!”

Of course he feels guilty straight away, still it’s a relief to see the astounded guy stumble to his feet and hurry out the kitchen.

...  Reader   ...

The watchtower has become one of your favourite spots in in all of Asakusa. Up here, you can see the entire district sprawling beneath...and no one can get close without you noticing them beforehand as long as you pay attention. Which you don’t always. At least not right now.

Lying on your back with the legs stretched up against the supporting timber, your focus has strayed to a silly bird is trying to steal loose fibres from the bell’s rope, only to have to give up each time it’s found a string to pull at because the other end is impossibly stuck. The little animal is getting increasingly frustrated. Just give up...some things are meant to be. Yellow and grey feathers fluff with anger at yet another defeat until the bird surveys the remaining options. Don’t bother. As if hearing your thought, it flutters off with an undignified squeak and you watch it disappear between the houses below.

“So this’s where you hide.”

The deep voice causes you to squeak and you scramble to face the one person you’d been trying to avoid by climbing up here in the first place.

“Shinmon.” Why does he have to look so good when the wind tussles his hair? “What...I’m not hiding.”

On your feet, you wish you were tall enough to look down at him to feel superior. Benimaru is always acting aloof, never letting anyone see what he’s thinking...unless everything really does bore him. Or annoy him. This time you notice a faint pull of his lips.

“Hiding or not...we need to talk,” he sighs.

What’ve I done now? Something has changed the day of the raid.

You’ve been feeling it in the silences...or maybe it’s all in your mind. Maybe there really isn’t something brewing in Benimaru’s eyes when he backs off from challenges he’d have picked up on before. Or could it be that Konro’s calm finally have rubbed off on the guy? He barely talks to you, and half the time he begins a conversation it dissolves into nothing and he leaves but only after lingering at the very end before leaving the room. The whole thing has been pissing you off.

“So....talk,” you challenge. As expected, he keeps quiet preferring to lean against the railing rather than face you. “Well, if you won’t then I will!” And don’t you dare look at me while I give you a piece of my mind. “Obviously, it’s brought a lot of complications from the day I’ve stayed here. No, it wasn’t entirely voluntarily from my side to begin with...staying here, I mean,” you begin to falter as you have to search for the words but try to pull yourself together, “and you made it very clear that it wasn’t out of consideration for my needs, which I suppose is fair enough but take your petty grievances out on someone else than me when you regret that decision or have the decency t-”

“I don’t regret it, damnit!” Suddenly, he’s backed you against the beam, arms caging you in as he leans over you. “What bothers me is not you staying with us but the idea of you being gone!”

Logically, you know the life down on the streets still is bustling with all the usual noises and smells, but Benimaru and you are suddenly isolated in a little bubble up under the sky and time is standing still there.

“...gone?”

“Dunno when it started or why it took me so long but I realized that day...” He licks his lips quickly. “O-bāchan...of course she had to meddle and she can be impossible to deny. She knew what she was doing when she came to get you, trust me.”

“I thought I knew that she knew but now I think what she knew was something else than I thought...”

That sentence had made a lot more sense in your brain.

“The point is -” and you could have sworn the man was blushing now -“I want you to stay because I...I really like you.”

Then why are you being such an a-oooh! His gaze has never been so tender. His hand is warm and gentle as it cradles your cheek and you can’t help but lean into it. The two of you have touched before when sparring, but to slowly let your hands wander up his chest before snaking behind his neck – it sends goosebumps racing all the way to your toes. Your breath won’t go any deeper than the top half of your lungs, but it doesn’t matter as long as Benimaru’s lips are neari-

The booming sound of an explosion might be distant but both of you turn to see where it comes from.

[thesurielships]

feysand + “you promised me a cookie!”

kiss me like your ex is in the room

note: this is super late, I’m sorry. I hope you’re doing well, and I look forward to read your next creations when you feel better. Enjoy :))

note 2: uncle Colm is a character from Derry Girls and his lines are quoted from the show. It's a really good show, BTW.

Word count: 1.6k | Masterlist | ao3

It is a truth universally acknowledged that Rita’s bakery is the best in Velaris. They specialize in finger foods and exquisite little pastries, each more exotic and original than the next; but the town’s favorite – or at least, Feyre’s favorite – will always be their double chocolate chip cookies.

These are no simple cookies. Even though they have been critiqued by many a reputed culinary writer, the secret to the complexity of their taste has yet to be uncovered. With a chewy center and crispy edges, chocolate chips that explode in your mouth and a bittersweet aftertaste that is nothing short of addictive, plus the extreme exclusivity of Rita’s services, they are nothing short of an urban legend. In fact, hiring Rita for an event earns you a spot on the local gossip column for weeks, no questions asked.

Feyre supposes she shouldn’t be surprised that her cunning devil of a sister managed to get them to cater for her wedding. Or that she only made her maid of honor in order to work her to the bone. Nevertheless, as she gazes at Nesta’s dazzling smile and the absolutely enamored look in Cassian’s eyes, Feyre finds she is glad to be here. Even though she didn’t get to the cookies in time.

Her friend Alis catches her eye from a few tables away and as she walks towards her, a familiar voice makes her pause.

“Now, I don't mind a bit of a breeze, if any, I prefer it. But that one was aggressive. So I says to myself. I say 'Colm, this is no day for a do'. ”

The steadiness of his monotone never fails to amaze her.

“When the bride arrives, and I say by this stage, the wind was fierce. I've never heard wind like it -”

Feyre dares a peek at the new victim of her uncle Colm’s boring and endless ramblings, and the sight that greets her almost makes up for the missing cookies. Rhysand - the best man and general pain in her ass ever since she met him a couple of months ago – is the portrait of boredom. He is slouching in his chair, his chin in his hand and his eyelids drooping as he struggles to focus on uncle Colm’s story. It’s the first time she sees him without his usual smirk, and she hates that she misses it.

“Howling like a banshee it was,” her uncle drones on. “So the poor girl –”

Feyre clears her throat and Rhysand starts. She bites back a laugh at the hope that kindles in his face when he sees her.

“Feyre dear, I was just telling this handsome young fellow about –”

“The windy wedding story?”

Uncle Colm smiles at her fondly. “You remember?”

She nods solemnly. “It’s a very funny story. You should hear the rest of it, Rhysand,” she adds with a smirk.

Rhysand’s eyes are wide with horror. She can almost hear him shout ‘save me!’

“So the poor girl,” her uncle resumes his retelling, “the bride now this is –”

Feyre raises a brow defiantly. Why should I?

“She arrives and –”

He glances to his side and she follows his gaze. The prick has not one, not two, but three of Rita’s cookies on a plate.

“Isn't she no –”

“Uncle Colm,” she exclaims in a high pitched tone, “I’m sorry to interrupt such a good story, but I actually need Rhysand for a very urgent matter.”

The usually unflappable best man practically jumps out of his seat. “Duty calls, uncle Colm.”

“That’s a shame,” her uncle sighs. “I was so close to the end. Are you sure –”

“Yes,” Rhysand squeaks, and Feyre coughs to hide her laugh. “Maybe next time,” he throws over his shoulder as he drags her away.

No sooner are they out of earshot that she collapses into a fit of giggles. Rhysand frowns and she laughs harder. He tries to keep his face stern but the corners of his lips are twitching. When she finally sobers up, Feyre offers him her hand, palm up.

One groomed eyebrow lifts. “What?”

“What do you mean, what? You promised me a cookie!”

Rhysand slides his hands into his pockets and Feyre’s heart sinks. “I did no such thing.”

“But, but,” she sputters, “I saw you! You looked at those cookies!”

He chuckles, low and soft. “Those cookies aren’t mine, Feyre darling.”

“You tricked me.”

She glares up at him but freezes when her eyes fall on the doors behind him. Tamlin is here. The blood drains from her face. She can feel herself quaking in her heels and she hates how he makes her feel small just by walking in the room.

“What’s wrong?”

She doesn’t answer.

What in the Cauldron is he doing here? Is he here for me?

Her chest is too tight. She can’t breathe.

He’s here for me, he’s here for me, he’s here for-

“Feyre.”

She startles at Rhysand’s voice. He turns to look behind him and she grabs him by the lapel. “Don’t,” she whispers.

He patiently waits for her to explain.

“Tamlin, my ex –”

Understanding dawns in his eyes. His smile is grim.

Feyre dares another glance over his shoulder. “He’s –” she croaks, swallows, clears her throat, “comin –”

Rhysand’s lips on hers stop her short.

Feyre just stands there, too stunned to react. He draws away slightly. His hands cup her face and his thumbs stroke her cheeks lovingly. His gaze is steady on hers as he waits for her to make the next move.

Her hands are still clutching his lapels so she pulls him close and kisses him.

She means to repel Tamlin, but as soon as their lips meet she forgets everything but the man that has been haunting her dreams for months. The kiss is slow and languorous, and Feyre wonders at the softness of his lips, the gentleness of his caress. Her fingers bury in his hair and his hands trail down to her waist, setting her skin burning on their wake. She moans and he smiles. She bites his lower lip so he allows her entry, and Feyre is so busy committing the taste of him, the feel of him to memory that it takes her a couple of minutes to realize that someone is watching.

A throat clears next to them, and Feyre pulls away. Rhysand’s eyes are a mirror of what she’s feeling: a mixture of surprise, delight and longing. His smile is slow as he reads the naked emotions on her face, his hold tightening around her waist. Her fingers are still caressing the soft hair at the base of his neck.

Tamlin clears his throat once again and Feyre reluctantly untangles herself from Rhysand, though he nestles his hand in the small of her back to keep her close.

“Tamlin,” she begins and is surprised to find her voice strong and her knees steady. She remembers something an old friend of hers told her in the dark days following their break up. ‘Only you can decide what breaks you.’ And here, in Nesta’s wedding and in Rhysand’s arms, Feyre decides she is done being afraid of her controlling asshole of an ex.

She levels a condescending glare at Tamlin and says nothing, but he’s too busy scowling at Rhys to notice. “Who. Are. You?”

Feyre’s nostrils flare. How typical of him to dismiss her, to address any one but her as though what she has to say doesn’t matter.

Rhysand’s only answer is his arrogant smirk, and she kind of wants to laugh.

“Tamlin.”

Now he looks at her, frowning at the smirk dancing on her lips, a mirror of her companion’s.

“This is my boyfriend, Rhys. But you can call him Rhysand.”

Her accomplice’s fingers poke her side in amusement. “And who might you be?” he asks, looking down his nose at the man who has been haunting her nightmares for months.

“I’m Feyre’s fiancé,” Tamlin bites back.

Rhysand’s face is disinterested, almost bored. “Darling, you didn’t tell me you were engaged.”

She shoots him a sheepish smile. “I guess it slipped my mind.” And because she just can’t help herself, she puts a hand back on his muscled chest and says in a sultry voice, “I can’t think of much when you’re around.”

The moment she says it, the truth of it resonates in her heart. She doesn’t know what gives her away, but something sparks in Rhysand’s eyes and he pulls her impossibly closer. “Yeah?”

She bites her lip. “Yeah.”

His smile takes her breath away. She doesn’t bother looking back at Tamlin as she declares, “For the record, asshole, we are not engaged. I refused your proposal three months ago.”

“You were confused. You don’t know what –” Tamlin starts but Rhysand interrupts him, “You heard the lady.”

Rhysand’s gaze doesn’t stray from hers for a second. Feyre is drowning, no, floating in this moment. She feels free, unmoored. She wants to throw her head back and laugh until she cries. She wants to dance until her feet ache. She wants to hold this man and never let go.

“Thank you,” her voice is earnest. “You saved me.”

He leans so close their noses touch. “You know, Tamlin left a few seconds ago.”

Feyre loops her arms around his neck. “Is that so?”

His eyes are brighter than stars. “About those cookies,” he begins, almost hesitantly. “I could bake you some.”

She raises a disbelieving brow.

“I know, I know. I’m no Rita, but I happen to have a mighty good recipe. Except instead of flour, I use oatmeal –”

Feyre grimaces.

“Instead of butter, coconut oil.”

She scrunches her nose in disgust.

“And instead of chocolate –”

“You’re replacing chocolate?”

“It could be a date.”

Feyre’s heart stumbles. She glances left and right then stands on the tips of her toes to whisper conspiratorially in his ear. “I would be burned at the stake if the people around here found out I chose this awful creation instead of a good ol’ Ritacookie –”

Rhysand rolls his eyes.

“But it’s a date.”

Tag list: @joyceortiz13 @bailey-4244 @quakeriders @standbislytherin @mariamuses @ignite14 @1800-fight-me @velarian-trash @rhysands-highlady @queenblueoffire @rowaelinforeverworld @feeoly @buckybvrnes @dayanna-hatter @shadowstar2313 @goldfishh20 @sleeping-and-books @crackedship @your-high-lady @thesirenwashere @whiskeybusiness1776 @amren-courtofdreams @tswaney17 @julemmaes @booksbooksbooksworld @queenofbumblebees @meowsekai @awkward-avocado-s

[cartoonfangirl1218]

Love in a Fiery Place or Hot and Bothered

Summery: Lisa tries matchmaking. Never let her matchmake. See my (shamlessly self promoted) other fic, Just like Fire, for who the heck Volcana is.

It's been months since Lisa had seen her brother or Mick ever since they went on their time travel, earth saving mission and she was bored.

Sure she had pulled off her share of heists and gone on a few dates with her favorite, babbling engineer but jewelry and sex had it's perks for so long. Especially with Cisco having a job.

She really needed a hobby, but one evening after too much beer and watching Love Actually on Netflix she thought of a brillant idea.

Matchmaking! 

She could matchmake someone she knew and watch them act all blushy and idiotic. It would be definitely entertaining.

She could match up her brother, but Lenny would never go for it. Besides she couldn't exactly see her brother in an attractive way. The guy made cold puns and read Kant during his spare time. Who would go for such a nerd like that!

But Mick. Mick was an equally challenging prospect with his unhealthy obsession with fire, alcoholic tendencies and general unpredictablness. But there were lots of the pyros in the world, she just had to find one who would be willing to date him.

Unfortunately that was a lot harder than she thought.

After checking most dating sites, she found that most Pharos were either dead, in jail, old or jailbait or that they weren't super into it. Just a few trash can fires.

She needed someone who would be just as willing to burn a building down.

So she had to up the search a notch. And what better way was to hack into S.T.A.R. Labs. More specifically, Cisco accessing into S.T.A.R. Labs.

"Please..." Lisa pouted. 

"No no no. I'm not helping you find MICK of all people a date,” Cisco protested.

"Why not? Don't you believe in love conquers all? You redeemed me,” Lisa purred. 

"Hardly." Cisco snorted. 

"Very true, my corrupt little scientist," Lisa smiled, leaning over his chair and basically falling into his lap. "But love could get him off the crime paths he's been on.” 

"Then he can fall in love with a psychiatrist. Putting him with another pyro will only cause more crime." Cisco stammered as Lisa caressed his long hair

"Pyros can handle pyros. Psychiatrists are suicidal and it won't do any good if the girl dies of fear after two dates." Lisa pouted again, bringing her lips closer to his, ending with a nice smoldering kiss.

Plus three more after that.

"Umm what we're talking about?" Cisco asked dazedly coming up for air

"Files. I'm not going to let this go Cisco. I always get what I want,”  Lisa smirked

Cisco paused, "If I do this, I'M choosing the movie and the restaurant for our date."

"Fine! We'll go to that disco bar." Lisa rolled her eyes.

"Alright!" Cisco started humming Bees Gees as he typed away on the computer for pyro meta criminals.

"There's none. That's impossible. There really aren't ANY pyros in Central City besides Mick?l Lisa cried

"Guess they didn't want to steal his gimmick," Cisco shrugged, looking relieved

"Do you think there are any in the Starling city?" She asked "Don't know, it's more mercenary and assassins then metas." He answered

"Maybe there are fire aliens?" Lisa thought out-loud, 

"Only Earth 3,” Cisco shook his head.

"Earth Three?" Lisa froze. 

"Shit!” Cisco eyes widened "No, no, no. That's just some crazy dream I had. There's no such thing as Earth Three is like there being Earth Two. Totally stupid" Cisco babbled

"Take me." Lisa demanded Cisco started taking off his shirt.

"I like how your mind works. But no. Take me to Earth Three. Tell me all about it. Are there really such things as fire aliens?" Cisco groaned

"I'll do it myself. You know I will. So you can come help or I'll trash this place doing it myself" Lisa insisted

"We are so lucky that Caitlin and Flash are out today" Cisco groaned again "Yaaas"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- They had entered to Earth Three just as Supergirl finished saving a bus full of children. Once the reporters left, Cisco introduced himself and her as friends of the Flash. Lisa explained her mission to help Mick find love. 

Supergirl had been just as convinced as Cisco at the idea that love redeems but with a lot of wheedling and encouragement about second chances, Supergirl had allowed the idea of helping them.

"I think I know the girl perfect for Mick" Supergirl explained enthusiastically as they walked to the government building, DEO. "Claire Selton, code name Volcana. Born with pyrokenesis and trained to be a weapon by the government. She went rouge on them and used her powers to steal and cause crime. Superman had to put her on a deserted island in hopes not to harm any more civilians. But stay here. I'll be back soon." She left them in a plain white room, suitable for a noir style interrogation scene and waited. Five minutes later, Supergirl was back with a young thirty year old. The girl in question had long flaming orange hair that reached to her ankles in a messy braid. Her tan skin glowed brightly against her white bikini, her ambers eyes sparked with confusion and annoyance.

"No" Claire hissed, sitting down on the table. Lisa noted with pleasure that the metal table steamed and let out drifts of smoke when Claire touched it.

"No what?" Cisco asked.  "Supey told me what you want. My answer is no. I am not going to a totally different Earth for a guy I never even met. What is this? 1689? Supergirl take me back to the island I am missing my afternoon tanning" she demanded. "Oh oh well that's understandable but did Supergirl mention that this guy has a heat gun that radiates about 220 tons of fire power in a single shot" Lisa rattled off.  "It's 225 tons of fire power btw. Plus how many guys here can say they burned a house for the sake of watching it burn" Cisco added.  "And he's been practicing flame swallowing,” Lisa added.  "Claire.." Supergirl started calmly.  "It's Volcana to you.” Claire scowled.

"Volcana. You're not going to get married to him. Just one date and if you don't like it you can come back here. Besides aren't you tired of being alone in your little island?"

"I wouldn't be there if it weren't for you!" Volcana shot back.

"You were hurting innocent people!" Supergirl retorted.

"Well those "innocent people" we're hurting me. I didn't want to be a weapon but you all treat me like a bad guy because I am what I am.” Volcana ranted, flames suddenly burst from her hands.

Lisa and Cisco jumped back and Supergirl put on a defensive stance.  "And he will love you for it" Lisa put in.

"We have a lot of metas. They get what it's like to be used for their powers. Now Mick will get you even more because he understands how pretty the flames are. It doesn't have to be a date, just two adults talking, fellow pyro to pyro." Cisco said

Claire glared at them in silence, contemplating. "Fine, only for the sake of watching something burn."

The three nodded eagerly at each other. --------------------------------------------------------------- Claire changed into a more appropriate outfit of red leather top and black leather pants with combat boots as they left Smallville.

"Good luck," Supergirl gave a tentative thumbs up and left.

As the three went through the portal, Lisa interrogated Claire and was pleased to find out that she and Mick had a lot in common. Love of alcohol, way too graphic descriptions of explosions and fiery deaths, and had no filter when it came to humor.

"They are practically soul mates!" Lisa whispered giddily in Cisco's ear as they left the Earth One S.T.A.R. labs to Mick's abandoned apartment.

"Oh joy," Cisco muttered sarcastically. --------------------------------------------------------- Cisco had left immediately, stating he didn't want there as a witnesses for future villainy. 

Lisa settled Claire to the guest room of the apartment and waited for the boys to arrive. Claire had gotten bored so she sat down, turned on the oven and stared. Another pastime she shared with Mick. Lisa swore her face was going to break open if she smiled anymore. 

Oh this was going to be so good, and if it ended badly damn it was going to be more entertaining than the firework bomb Mick had set up for April Fool's Day. Leonard and Mick arrived at 7 pm. They didn't say anything about where they had been, they were just so exhausted and about to fall asleep but Lisa insisted on keeping Mick awake, slapping his cheek the whole time as he walked to the kitchen. 

"What do you want?" Mick scowled, shoving her hand away from his face.  "I'm about to change your life, Mick this is Claire" Lisa introduced "Claire this is Mick.” 

Leonard gave a questioning look to her but she just grinned. 

"Oh you gotta be kidding me. Look however she suckered you into this I'm not interested. Leave." Mick instructed Claire.

"Aren't you a charmer? I've seen midgets more handsome than you" Claire spat. 

"She's a pyro. Claire, show him" Lisa said.  Claire sighed but showed off anyway by blowing a kiss as her hand spouted fire like a dragon. "Where's smoke, there's flame. That's me. Volcana" Mick just stared in awe. 

"Heatwave" he lifted the gun from his belt, "Do that again, I need to try something.” 

Volcana complied, Mick shot his gun at the same time and it set the table on fire, and quickly spread to the oven. 

"Holy Shit!" Lisa screeched and grabbed the fire extinguisher taped to the door for emergencies like this, spraying it everywhere. 

"What the hell are you two doing" Leonard yelled but the two heat villains ignored. 

"Volcana huh?" Mick grinned maniacally, leaning against the charred table. "I like your heat gun. Sure could have used it on those cold Metropolis nights" Volcana flirted back, staring up at Mick. "I'll leave you to it. C'mon Lenny," Lisa shoved Leonard out the door. When she stopped by the apartment to drop off a six pack and to get her golden bra for her date with Cisco, she saw the living room an absolute mess with scorch marks in random places, a torched smoke detector on the ground, pile of clothes and the smell of smoke in Mick's room. 

She was good. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- The following weeks just reeked of success. Claire stopped by the apartment regularly. There was a new headline everyday as the couple started fires and explosions around Central City for their dates, and Lisa had overheard their nicknames for each other. Fireball and Spitfire. 

Since it went so well she was even thinking of setting up the other Rogues like Trickster II. Maybe with some Metahumans that Cisco watched like Peek a Boo. She was once again considering setting up her brother but she had pick pocketed his phone earlier and saw that he seemed to have sort of "thing" with White Canary from his Legends team. Which prompted her to stalk any information about Sara. Purely for research, not that she wasn't worried about him getting hurt. Please Len was way too cautious for that to happen. 

At the same time the success of her match had come with a price. Due to their fire kink, the two had burned Mick's room, her room, the guest room, the living room and the kitchen was beyond repair. 

She had to crash at Cisco's place which was nice, but Leonard came also because his cold gun was in the threat of being torched at any second. Nor could he get any piece of quiet with the all the fire puns. "Not fun to hear them," Lisa taunted. 

"That's different. Mine are clever. Theirs are just about fire and sex. Some things I do NOT need to know about my partner." "Thanks for the nightmares," Lisa sighed as a "lovely" mental image entered her head. With them crashing at Cisco's place, Leonard resigned to glaring from the love seat while she and Cisco were on the couch. It was not helping date night. So it was up to her to save the apartment. 

She had entered the apartment expecting another scene of quite literal hot love but found more burning rage.

"You are weak!!!" Claire screamed, "You don't even have pyrokensis you just have a gun huh. I can start a fire whenever I want! You are nothing!" "You're just a hypocrite! Oh the government just wanted to use me" Mick mocked with a falsetto "Screw that. You're just as selfish as me. You just use your powers for petty thief but you could be better, so YOU ARE WEAK!" 

"You have nothing. No brains, no strength and yet you think the world would bow to your awesomeness. And you are the most impulsive idiot I ever met. You just forge along with no regard for logic or what we are suppose to be doing on our date. Honestly what am I suppose to do with you, tell me!" "You think you're so hot. Well I'm hotter, hotter than Cold." Mick sneered.

"I thought you didn't care about that!" Claire protested.

"In the middle of sex, yeah I do." Mick retorted.  "Well the TV was on, I happened to mention he was cute get over it!" 

Lisa cringed, ewwww!

"You also said the same about the police officer, Scarlet, the bartender..." 

"You are just jealous." Claire scoffed.

"JEALOUS! I'll freeze your ass in a place where fires die!" A loud crash sounded through the apartment followed by a explosion. 

Lisa scrambled out of the apartment and never looked back. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- After that incident, Lisa rationalize it was a natural lovers quarrel and that the two would work it out, therefore there was no need to tell anyone. That because of her honest assumption it was a lover's quarrel or her pride not letting her admit that her match might not have been as successful, it was up to anyone's guess but a phone call three days later confirmed the worst case scenario. 

It was the middle of the day and Lisa was online shopping using the money she stole from a heist earlier that month when Cisco called.

"Lisa, have Mick and Claire been having any trouble that you know of? Any that you feel like warning us about?" Cisco asked, calmly with a slight edge that gave Lisa a sinking feeling. Best to play it dumb.

"Uh just some spats but you know. Couples fight, they fight. Why do you ask?" Lisa chirped. 

"Well you should know that you're little pet project has gone up in flames." Lisa rolled her eyes. Wonder how long he was waiting to use that pun? "Heatwave was stealing from the Central City bank when Volcana stopped by, something about how "she was better than him" and was trying to one-up his heist. Thankfully we were able subdue them both. Mick's back with the Legends and Claire was sent back to Earth Three. No one knows she came from Earth Three except you, me and the Flash. You and I are the only ones that know how she actually got here." 

"All's well that ends well," Lisa weakly smiled.  She could just feel him glare through the phone. "We're going to talk when I get home." ---------------------------------------------------------------- "So what are we not doing?" Cisco asked pacing in front of her as she sat on his couch. 

"Match making Mick with a pyro." Lisa muttered.  "And...." 

"Match making Mick with anyone." 

"And...." 

"Match making in general." "Ever.” Cisco said.  "Ever," Lisa repeated. 

[moviestorian]

Im glad the asks helped! I have anxiety and depression and can understand what youre going through. My ask today is what are your thoughts on Bo Rhap as a movie?

Thanks! :) I’m above all extremely happy to see people on this site being so kind and supportive in time of need, it’s a human quality that will never get enough praise! I’m also really sorry to hear about your problems. :( I send you lots of love, I can imagine how difficult it must be for you, but I’m sure you're strong and coping❤️

As for your actual question - that’s some truly excellent and interesting timing, considering that I rewatched BoRhap (with @incblackbird) literally three days ago. :P It was already my third rewatch, and while I enjoyed the movie overall, I liked it quite significantly less than upon the last time I saw it. Of course, there’s been gazillion discourses about BoRhap, whether it’s genius, extremely evil, etc., but since it’s such a broad topic (and I think some of my opinions could potentially outrage certain parts of the fandom), this time I’m going to stick to purely cinematic terms.

Needless to say, the soundtrack is excellent - with music such as Queen’s you don’t really have to do much, but they made a good choice of songs, alternating between their best known hits (We Will Rock You, Somebody to Love, Bohemian Rhapsody) and songs to fit the narrative (Doing All Right, Now I’m Here, Who Wants to Live Forever, Love of my Life). It’s practically impossible to leave the screening of BoRhap without at least one Queen song stuck in your head.

The cast was overall very good, too. My personal favourites in terms of acting were Gwilym Lee (who I liked even more than Rami), Rami Malek, Lucy Boynton and Allen Leech - I think they did a great job with their roles as they were written (whether their characters were well written or not is a subject for a whole another discussion). All the side characters were well acted, too (Mike Myers, Meneka Das and Aaron McCusker, for instance, I found particularly memorable), but I must admit I wasn’t a big fan of Joe Mazzello and Ben Hardy, but even they weren’t bad. So, acting is definitely one of the strongest points of the film.

Moving on, I also think they did a great job when it comes to costumes (Brian lending some of his old clothing definitely helped) and make-up (except for Roger’s wigs, perhaps); the choreography and stage movement for the characters were super well done, too - and it definitely wasn’t an easy task!

Now, let’s discuss cinematography. I will talk about editing in a separate paragraph, so for now I’m gonna stick to other aspects. The composition of shots struck me as rather mediocre, nothing particularly exceptional in either good or bad way, it was pretty basic but rather correct. Of course, there were some shots I really liked, but if I were to start adding screenshots the post would become way too long. XD The colours I really liked, especially in the musical scenes - they were vivid and lovely, and they used a combination of colours that I tend to appreciate in cinema, like various shades of blue and red. Finally, the camerawork - for dialogue scenes it was correct; again, rather average with some use of handheld camera which served no particular dramatic purpose, but it wasn’t nowhere near very bad, also it’s quite a common thing in modern biopics I would say. Handheld camerawork isn’t bad in default, but my comment largely comes from my personal preferences: in most cases I don’t really like it, especially when it’s particularly shaky. Then, there are scenes in BoRhap which display excellent camerawork, namely Live Aid and We Will Rock You scenes. If most scenes were filmed like that, I would give the movie a higher rating.

Before I move to the worst (imo) cinematic aspects of the movie, let’s have a look at writing. It is probably the most divisive thing in the fandom - people seem to either adore or absolutely loathe it; my stance lies somewhere inbetween. The first time I saw the film (I’m gonna remind you that I’ve seen it four times), I had certain objections, but the script didn’t bother me all that much; I was mostly simply having fun in the cinema. With every next watching, the experience was getting gradually worse, but even now I don’t hate the movie. Yes, some of the dialogue is cheesy, trite and makes me cringe a bit - certain parts of the script definitely end on an “overly sentimental” territory, I can’t deny that. Knowing quite a lot about Freddie, Queen and their stories, I generally think they deserve a better script; some characterisation was a bit offputting and chronology was all over the place. Having said that, I understand where some of those narrative choices come from, as scripts for mainstream movies require oversimplification of events, archetypes, and patterns. And quite frankly, I don’t think BoRhap differs any drastically from most modern biopics; it’s not a masterpiece, but - in my opinion - it’s also not bad overall. Regardless the flaws of the script, the movie still managed to emotionally affect a huge, if not major, portion of viewers, entertain and move them, and honestly? I think that was pretty much the point. Btw, there were some lines that I really loved, like “Puritans in public, perverts in private”, and I still think that their decision to cut from Live Aid performance to Ray Foster’s grim face during We Are the Champions was the funniest shit ever. XD Would BoRhap’s script benefit from sticking to historical accuracy? I’m gonna say yes, I think so - the scenes that were the closest to actual events are definitely the strongest - but this approach would require tons of changes, including narrowing down the narrative scope and probably the characters, too. Also, a lot of people keep forgetting that this is not an arthouse, niche film and therefore resorts to narrative and cinematic choice that compromise between satisfying the fans and the newbies; it’s meant to tell a (simple) story and entertain, not educate and provoke existential and philosophical debates. Still, I think the script could have been done a bit better, because some scenes  (the tour “Now I’m Here” montage) feel a bit...random?

Finally, the infamous editing. I totally agree that it was one of the most undeserving Academy Awards that year, because some scenes were simply atrocious, with their unmotivated and overly fast cuts and unreasonably ridiculous face that doesn’t fit the dialogue scenes, and those are honestly the worst when it comes to pacing and editing. I think the editing is the worst aspect of BoRhap; but even here, I could point at some examples of pretty amazing editing (Oscar-worthy? Not necessarily, but definitely very good); again, I’m gonna bring up Live Aid and “We Will Rock You” scenes, especially the latter, because less people talk about it. I already mentioned that it has some really nice camerawork AND colours, but also the editing is actually really cool, because it’s cut to the music! Which makes me think: “what a shame!”, because if they went with different editing choices, the movie would be affected in a positive way. The way we have it, it’s either a hit or miss (sadly, mostly miss), and the badly edited scenes are pretty striking, so the ones that are done nicely are unfortunately a wasted potential.

Okay, this is already waaay too long, so I’m just gonna finish with a few general remarks. Well, despite BoRhap’s flaws, I still like and enjoy it. With every screening slightly less, but enjoy it anyway. I don’t think any amount of discourse will ever take away my positive experiences and memories from seeing it twice in cinema. It sparked my previously dormant love for Queen and united me with some people in the fandom and in real life; making this movie made Brian and Roger happy; as a result, I like this movie. It brings back a lot of positive recollections, which sometimes is more important than critical discussions. And boy, do I adore those - I’m often critical and I adore analysing stuff academically; but I think that not all daily interactions require those and depending on who’s asking and what about, I’m capable of switching between the two options. If somebody asks me in 25 years whether I remember the times of BoRhap’s release, I’ll be far less likely to say “yeah, the editing sucked and writing was cringy, I remember the discourse on tumblr and instagram” than “Yes, I remember that chilly evening in December when I had a really fun time and ended up with 10 Queen songs stuck in my head”, because the latter is the experience I want to remember.

Thank you for this ask! Hope it wasn’t overly exhausting to read, I didn’t proofread this, sorry! xx

[peerless-soshi]

Oh that's great, thanks for the reply :) Btw I'm that xiyao enthusiast from ao3 and I was wondering if you'd like to write something for my other less popular ships. So maybe 70/76 with fengqing or 41/94 for quanyin?

Rules: Send me two (2) tropes from this list + a ship and I’ll describe how I’d combine them in the same story.   

QuanYin: First kiss +  Hair Brushing/Braiding 

Quan Yi Zhen hesitated, eyes dropping. Weird. He wasn’t sure what to do. Weird. He wasn’t sure what to do when shixong screamed at him, circled the room few times like a wind-up toy with no will in its moves, then sat down to get up again, cradling head in his hands. It was all too weird. He wasn’t used to seeing shixong lost, and the rareness of this situation made Quan Yi Zhen even more confused.  

“Shixiong?”

“Why?” Yin Yu snapped. “Why did you save me? Why are you so stubborn?!”

Quan Yi Zhen understood one thing. Shixiong wasn’t happy about awakening in the Martial Palace of the West at all.

He was, in fact, angry. Very angry. His crossed arms and frown lines were giving a message: stay away from me.

It was like this: after he saved Yin Yu’s soul, Quan Yi Zhen lived on efforts, for years probably, to preserve his shixiong’s last breath and bring him back to life. None of gods knew why, or how, he was trying but who cares as long as shixiong came back.

Then it was like this: he made a choice to watch over Yin Yu’s body by himself. That demon – Red Rain Demon or something, he didn’t bother to remember stupid things – offered to help, but Quan Yi Zhen refused. No, it couldn’t be. He wouldn’t give up on Yin Yu, even if Yin Yu wished to hate him in return. It was fine. And for once, Quan Yi Zhen was patient. So patient. There had to be something, one thing, anything he could do to reward shixiong for all the moments when he had been irritating, disappointing, troublesome, himself…

And finally, it was like this: the Red Demon gave Quan Yi Zhen some advice as the nice prince followed them, an indulgent smile on his lips. Quan Yi Zhen liked him – sometimes the prince smiled just like shixiong. One of the things the Red Demon recommended was infusions, the other was pills bracing the spiritual energy, and then energy transmission… Quan Yi Zhen listened, and memorized. He could say that the prince was worried, but the vision of saving Yin Yu stole his attention away. Besides, could it be important?

“Yi Zhen?”

He bounced back to reality really fast. Yin Yu straightened, and Quan Yi Zhen saw him clearly. His face was exhausted and red, and his dark hair stuck to his brow in a sweat-damp strands. He looked a good deal older than before.

“Why?” Yin Yu repeated, slower this time. “You shouldn’t…” He cleared his throat. “I said what I had to say, and I did what I had to do. Things between us were over. But as usual, you had to interfere and…” His voice was hoarse with indignation, but not yet stripped of… gratitude, was it? Or shame?

Quan Yi Zhen was out of sorts. Their last conversation didn’t end well, this one was also swinging over a cliff. The art of speaking was one of many things shixiong had attempted to teach him, and had failed miserably. He couldn’t look into shixiong’s eyes, so he glimpsed the ajar window, and espied the darkening sky, dense and gravid with rain. It made him feel they were inside of storm even before the first drop burst forth. Thunders afar off, shixiong’s calm yet thunderous words in the room. After the battle with Jun Wu, they had taken the occasional black sky for a coincidence, because why wouldn’t they? Later they realized that without the emperor, the heaven was crumbling. Sometimes there were rain clouds, humid and lazy, and sometimes airy tufts of white snow shifting into flurries.  

“Shixiong…” Quan Yi Zhen started, uncertain. And paused.

He felt a sudden stab of doubt: he couldn’t do it alone. What? What should he say for shixiong to stay? In the back of his head, his brain stopped and declined. Stupid brain. Stupid him. But he bit his lip and said what first came to his mind, “Shidi likes.”

Yin Yu’s eyes narrowed now, and a question reflected in them. “What do you like?”

“Shixiong!” Quan Yi Zhen responded. Is there any sense to ask such question? It sounded like there was something else worth liking beside shixiong.  

Yin Yu stared at him. He shook his head in disbelief. “What did you just say?”

“Shixiong.”

“No, before that!”

“Shidi!” he said. And suddenly, it was as though his entire head was filled with emotions, all fear and blame, and if he didn’t shout it out he would explode. “Shidi likes shixiong! So shixiong, don’t be mad at me! Your shidi knows he’s incompetent and stupid, but without you, everything is even more stupid. Everyone else is stupid, heaven is stupid, your shidi is stupid, even fighting is stupid! Shidi is sorry, shixiong…” He turned to take a bow on the ground so violently that he hit his head, saw a burst of colorful sparks, left a crack on the floor and gave shixiong a little heart attack. The floor can be repaired. Then he folded his hands and went on, “Shixiong, please come back to your shidi. I can’t do anything without you. They make me do a lot of things that I don’t understand!”

If Yin Yu was shaking his head before, now his head looked like a windmill blow away in a storm; moving so fast it was one step away from breaking. Quickly, he ran to Quan Yi Zhen and knelt down beside him, putting hand on his shoulder. “What are you doing!? Get up now!”

“Shidi is sorry.”

There was a twist of uncontrolled worry on Yin Yu’s face, and when he realized it, his previous anger trailed off, then disappeared. He put Quan Yi Zhen on his feet, tenderly – he couldn’t help himself – and checked the scratch on his forehead. His finger was familiar, the pinching wound as well. So much like an older brother in cultivation, Quan Yi Zhen thought. As thought this gesture withdrew time, Quan Yi Zhen raised his head obediently, smiled, and he was a disciple again. And he was happier.

Yin Yu looked less happy. When he made sure Quan Yi Zhen was fine, his eyes flickered towards his clothes. He let out a huff of resignation. “Do you know how do you look like?”

Quan Yi Zhen knew what his shixiong saw: messy hair, dirty inner robes, the armor abandoned… somewhere. Quan Yi Zhen wasn’t sure where he had left it. His mind had been wrought with more important matters, so he couldn’t even recall the last time he had brushed his hair. As if to confirm his thoughts, Yin Yu reached out and picked a dry leaf out of a thicket of Quan Yi Zhen’s curls.

“You didn’t notice it?” he said, holding it up to show off its withered colors.

Truthfully, Quan Yi Zhen shrugged.

Yin Yu’s mouth actually fell open when he saw his shidi’s answer, but then his head hung. Impossible. It was impossible to expect more from Quan Yi Zhen. He was honest, and he was hated for it. He felt too free with himself to let others control him. And he was a little puppy lost in a big forest: he had his own world, so every step deeper into the brake of heavenly requirements made him undaunted, wilder, astray, and added more leaves to his hair.

“Sit down,” Yin Yu said, pointing slowly to the empty chair standing in the corner. His eyes stayed on it. The chair was brought here for Quan Yi Zhen to watch over him at nights. “Give me a comb. I can’t leave you like that.”

Quan Yi Zhen followed his instructions happily, fire in his soul; when he rushed out the room, he didn’t bother with opening the door but kicked it instead. It was so swift – a whistle of air and the hinges swayed and squeaked like black trees dancing outside. He made it in a second and he was back, sitting in an overly upright pose. Yin Yu walked up with a comb in his hair.

“You’re still such a child, Yi Zhen,” he said. It seemed as if he wanted to stroked Quan Yi Zhen’s head, a force of habit, but hesitated. There was his secret shame, and it has kept him away from shidi. “Do you even understand what you said earlier?” A small sigh escaped him. “Why do I ask? Of course you don’t understand. Talking about liking like a child… You must grow up and represent the heaven with dignity. It’s… your role now.”

“I don’t want it. And I like you.”

“Stop it,” Yin Yu said.

His tone was blunt, but it didn’t go hand in hand with his gestures. Quan Yi Zhen let his hair grow even longer once he had been left surrounded by worries, and it was wild and heavy now. Yin Yu gave it a little thought before he split his hair into thinner strands. The comb in his hand wailed, resisting.

They sank into silence filled by only comb strokes. There were so many things Quan Yi Zhen wanted to say, but even someone like him felt the weight of this moment and held his tongue. He only thought it was pleasant. A second or two it rested there: shixiong’s gentle hands, the feeling of being both seen and cherished. He had people who would help him. Sort of. But he didn’t want them, and they didn’t want him. Now his mouth curled with relief.

Yin Yu broke the silence first. “Again, I owe you something.”

“Me?” Quan Yi Zhen asked. “It is shidi who pays his debt. You saved my life. But even if you hadn’t saved me, shidi would have still tried to help shixiong.”

“Have you ever thought that I don’t want your help?”

“No?” Quan Yi Zhen said, sincerity in his voice.

Yin Yu didn’t answer, so he continued.

“Shixiong always said that shidi is irresponsible. Now I understand it and I’m taking responsibility for my actions. I brought shixiong back.”

“If you understood anything, you would take care of heaven’s issues, not me.”

“Shixiong is more important.”

“And that is why you’re such a child! Nothing can be more important than heaven to you!” Yin Yu growled in quiet ire.

He pulled too hard, and a small curl of hair stayed on the comb. Quan Yi Zhen hissed, unintentionally, and turned, rubbing his head. It wasn’t mean to be like this. No. He didn’t want to upset shixiong right after his awakening.

Yin Yu froze. There was an irritated sign, and a blush crossing his face. “You have no idea how many thoughts can appear in your head before… leaving. I don’t want to blame you, so…”

As he said it, Yin Yu’s eyes fell on Quan Yi Zhen’s face. What he found was, just like on that memorable day, the taste of tears and panic dancing on the surface of his gaze. Quan Yi Zhen looked terrible – thought, this “terrible” was still on the line of a childish call, so innocent, so colliding with their situation. Then a lightning struck, shaking the palace walls.

Yin Yu gestured to the window. “What’s going on here?”

“Everything goes bad without the emperor. The power in heaven is not stable,” Quan Yi Zhen explained, not hiding the bored tone of repeating after someone.

“And you decided to waste your time on me?”

Yin Yu laughed bitterly, but he bent over Quan Yi Zhen’s hair again, now combing it gently with his fingers. Quan Yi Zhen could feel him combing out knots when the teeth of the comb refused to cooperate, stuck between the curls like in a crown of tree. He was slow; one hair after the another, patiently, with care…

Quan Yi Zhen closed his eyes. “Wasted? What are you talking about? Shixiong knows best what to do. Who is as responsible as you?”

Yin Yu shook his head. He tried to stay teacher-patient, but it wasn’t easy. “I am a fallen god. I can’t help you. Just leave me alone and focus on your duties.”

“I don’t want duties. I want to be with you!”

Yin Yu let out a small breath. “Not everyone deserves what they want. Time to understand it.”

A chill snacked up Quan Yi Zhen’s spine. Piercing, so reminding. He thought again of the day shixiong was exiled, of laughs, and nights spent on empty sleeping. “No,” he said simply. “Nobody deserves this position more than shixiong.”

Yin Yu ignored him completely. He weighed Quan Yi Zhen’s hair in his hands and let it go. More pleased with his work, he wove a single long braid.  

“Old days are gone. Nothing will change that. Besides, how do you imagine it? I am banished.”

Quan Yi Zhen’s eyes finally sparkled. “There is no emperor! Nobody can tell you to leave!”

He turned to face Yin Yu, his shoulders straight and hands clasped in his lap. His whole figure seemed to vibrate, like ignited, and Yin Yu looked dazzled by his smile. This enthusiasm was catching. It passed from his skin to Yin Yu’s when he grabbed shixiong’s wrist and stood up.

“You can stay here. That prince is here too, right?”

Yin Yu just looked at him blankly. “He worked for it. I don’t even have spiritual power.”

“I can help!”

The chain of events that followed that confession appeared to go together with the storm that surprised them. It was as strong, it was like bathing in icy rain: brought a shiver, quickened breathing. Quan Yi Zhen seized Yin Yu by his collar and yanked his face towards his. He struggled, but Quan Yi Zhen hold on, mashing their lips together in what looked less like kissing and more like… punching teeth.

Though shock should hit like a blow, in this case it crept over Yin Yu slowly as he made sense of what happened. Then he gasped and staggered back, glaring and weeping his month.

“What is… you…” he stutterer. “No! What was that?”

Oh. Quan Yi Zhen’s face heated. He guessed that shixiong was mad again, and he made a vague gesture, something on the verge of shrugging. “The transmission of spiritual energy.”

“This? This was just- Who told you that nonsense?!” Yin Yu shouted, clearly lost for his words.

Quan Yi Zhen’s brow creased. “That red demon and the prince. No, wait. Was it Old Pei?”

The Red Demon had recommended transmitting spiritual energy as one of the most reliable methods. Quan Yi Zhen put much effort in it and felt pretty proud. All of the times to fail, did he make a mistake now?

Yin Yu made a noise that sounded like the verbal equivalent of dying. “Chengzhu. Why?” he cried and looked at Quan Yi Zhen. “Just… don’t do it again.”

“Why?” Quan Yi Zhen wrinkled his nose. “I did something wrong?”

“You didn’t even put spiritual energy into it.”

But the rest of his words drowned in the sounds of attempted not-kisses, raindrops, thunders and screams I can help you.  

[prorevenge]

Destroy my childhood, ruin my chance at college, and laugh when I said I was homeless? Lol cool, I'll ruin your f*cking life.

warning: this is a VERY long story with few updates and TL:DR at the end.

BACKSTORY: My mother was a really shitty person. I have 4 other siblings. One older sister, 3 way younger, 3 different dads. Before I was born (im a male btw), my oldest sister was taken away from my mother when she was a few months old because she tried to stab/slice the father of my sister WHILE HE WAS HOLDING HER. She lost custody and the dude left her. Older sister goes to live with her fathers family in a different city. CUE LIL OL ME COMING INTO THIS SEXY WORLD. My dad went to jail 2-3 years after I was born for a while, I rarely saw him. He's an alcoholic if that matters. She was a single mother but she made it work and she worked hard. One of the bigger problems was that she took out all her aggression and hatred of my father on me as well as work stress and etc. She dealt with sexual abuse growing up which I'm sure definitely affected her relationships and how she treated me as well. Anyways...

Cue me being abused from the age of 4-5 to about 17. Every day was hell. She was extremely strict and her perspective was warped. She was also pretty big in stature and had alot of strength. Examples of her being shitty: I've gotten beaten up badly once because HER room was dirty. The dishes weren't washed and I got beaten soon as I got home, even if there weren't dishes when I left to school. If i walked too loud, id get my ass beat. She broke my nose for looking at her the wrong way on my 10th birthday when she brought me a cake I was allergic too(It had peanuts, she knows im slightly allergic but feigned ignorance..) It was more or less every day or every other day. She used her fists/elbows/extension cords/hangers/chairs/canes/bats/etc. Whatever she could find I was getting beaten with. I couldn't ever escape to my room for long because she would always call me every few minutes to get her things or to yell at me. She never drank or did drugs or anything. Whenever she was upset and I happened to be in front of her she'd kick me down the stairs to make me hurry up. She's put a knife to my neck before and had to be forcibly stopped by her bf of the time. Burned my Christmas presents from other people (she didnt get me anything that year) and just other really shitty things. The only thing I will say, she tried really hard to make up for it with video games and electronics and etc. It didn't make a difference to me though, it never helped.

She controlled most aspects of my life. I got by with little petty revenges. Peeing in the Lipton iced tea she drank. Rubbing her forks and spoons between ny buttcheeks before i served her dinner. Ignoring her screams for help when she had kidney stones (how tf am i supposed to help anyways??) But by the time i got to highschool I turned to alcohol. I resented her and the negative atmosphere affected who I was as a person. I started to be cold and uncaring. Calculated. She started kicking me out every few months telling me to find somewhere else to live by age 15. She sent me away to a different country for a year and tried to keep my passport but I made it back to the US with the help of the embassy and my step father (she'd already left by that time and found some other dude). I came back senior year with no credits for the prior grade which ended with me getting a GED. I spent most of the time i could with my best friend and started working shitty jobs. I was terrible at saving as i had accumulated loads of shitty habits while growing up so it didnt make much difference. She eventually told me that If i went to college, I would ALWAYS have a place to live until I finished. Cue my first 2 semesters at a 2 year college, I maintained a 3.7ish gpa. My teachers loved me and it was my escape. Towards the end of my 2nd semester during finals, i came home late one night around 10pm and my mother yanks the door open screaming in my face asking when I'll move out. I'm slightly drunk and decide to completely ignore her and walk to my room. If I opened my mouth, that day would be the day I blew up and cursed her out. I've rarely ever raised my voice at her because it never ended well. Now at this point im 19 and I've been doing school full time with no savings. Im also fairly fit and could easily take my mom at this point (Never laid a hand on her or any woman, i hate violence). I get to my room, she rips my door open, and starts yelling. I say nothing and stare at her. She walks away and called the police on me saying she thought id murder her and my younger siblings. I don't know where the fuck she got that idea from as she's the one who's nearly killed me many times.

I packed everything into a duffle bag and left 5 minutes afterwards. I failed all of my finals because I couldn't make it to my school. Things kinda spiraled and the next 2-3 years were me on and off homeless. I survived the best I could in a big city with no college degree and made a lot of shitty choices due to my shitty habits. Eventually i found a profitable hobby that gave me meaning and through that i started to work my way up. Got my own apartment, had a full time job, and did my hobby on the side. I hadn't kept up contact with my mother at all but my younger sister who was old enough to have a phone found me on social media so i saw photos and such, she didn't have it anywhere near as bad but she did get beaten occasionally. My mother reached out via email all smiles asking how I've been. Now guys, ive always been envious of the relationship most ppl have with their moms so I gave her a chance and gave her a call. We talked for a few minutes and everything was civil and seemed like things would go okay but then...

She asked me what I've been up to the last few years and I told her honestly, that I was homeless for a while and struggled a lot after what she did to me but I worked my way out of it. SHE LITERALLY LAUGHS. She laughed for a few seconds in a very condescending kinda chuckle and then said "I never did a thing to you so you don't know what abuse is! its your own damn fault you were homeless. So how about yo-" but by that point I hung up. I was speechless and fuming. I don't know what abuse is? OKAY BITCH. IVE SPENT TOO FUCKING LONG LETTING YOU DESTROY MY SANITY. NOW IS THE TIME.

There was a few things my mother didn't know. One, I knew for a fact that current well paying job she had was gotten on lies as she never got her college degree and lied about it on her resume. Two, I had access to all of her email accounts and cloud storage accounts since I was the one that set them up when I was younger and she never changes her passwords. Lastly, she DEFINITELY wasn't aware that from 13yrs old and onto the last time she hit me I took photos of ALL my bruises/marks/wounds/bloody noses saving them to my computer and then google drive. ON TOP OF THAT, my little sister had been sending me photos via social media of the bruises she got from my mom.

The first thing I did was compile ALL of those photos/videos into one folder. I then reached out to CPS in my city and explained that my siblings were being abused, how I was abused in the past, and that I had mountains of proof. Since ive called the cops on my mother before AND the thing that happened with my older sister, there was immediately a home visit. They arrived almost a day later with the police and coincidentally my mother was literally in the process of beating my younger sister when they were knocking. Cue an Emergency removal of all my siblings from the house and my mother getting arrested though she was released hours later. (I was getting a day to day play by play because my mothers best friend is a blabber mouth and everything my mother said she told her son who relayed it to me without either of their knowledge.) I sent CPS all the evidence and there's a legit case against my mother now. The next day I emailed and then called up her job to inform them that she had lied about having a very necessary college degree as well current events in her life which sparked a background check. She was fired days later. Say adios to 75k and a blacklist in the only industry you know how to work. I then spitefully deleted every cloud account and email address I ever made for her, which was all of them which im sure will make keeping up with alot bills and etc nearly impossible. I then anonymously reported her to the IRS because of the tax fraud she committed for years by claiming people's children that weren't hers with ALOT of detailed information since I lived with her while she did it.

So now, my mother lost all her kids and her job. Im meeting with a caseworker from CPS next week to talk more about what happens moving forward but I do know they're NOT going back. Idk how she's gonna pay her mortgage now and survive. I'm sure she's gonna get a call from the IRS who'll be looking for a few thousand dollars she owes them. She also has to go back to court in a few months, not exactly sure what she was charged with but ill update when I find out how everything turns out.

Side Note: She isn't aware im the cause of any of this. I plan on keeping tabs on her and waiting until it seems like she's close to death before I tell her it was all me and I peed in her Lipton.

Updates:

1) I am psychologically not in the position to take care of my younger siblings or take on a parental role. I came very close to suicide 2 years ago and im just trying to work on my alcohol problem and other habits that keep me in a cycle of instability. No I haven't been to any programs or therapy, I don't think it will help me in regards to my nearly constant apathy and etc.

2) My 2 youngest siblings weren't really bothered much. It was mostly my little sister after I left who got beatings but luckily it wasn't anything near the level I had to deal with.

3) Im also incapable of taking custody because I don't have an apartment anymore due to bad decisions I made while drinking recently. So I'm back to homeless but I crash with a friend once in a awhile. I am very well aware I am an influence on my younger siblings and I'm trying to stay consistent with doing everything I can to be a better and more stable person for them so that maybe I can finally build a real relationship with someone in my family. I'm sorry to disappoint everyone who keeps wishing me more success.

4) Aside from my little siblings, I have zero contact with anyone else in my family. And even then, its been very rare because I had to avoid my mother to see them and didn't want her knowing i kept in contact (Meeting my little sister after school, facetime, etc). The rest of my family were well aware of what she did and distanced themselves. I don't plan on reaching out to them as im not good at maintaining relationships with mostly anyone anyways.

TL;DR - My mother abuses me badly for most of my life as well as my younger siblings. I have to drop out of college and support myself after she drove me to homelessness. She proceeds to laugh at me about me being homeless and denys abuse. So I ruined her life by getting my younger siblings removed and her arrested, making her lose her job, reported her to the IRS, and essentially set her up so that the remainder of her life is full of disaster and hardships.

(source) (story by howbout_that_lipton)