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May I have a food bib please?

Being an early saturday morning, this seems a fitting time to layout the red carpet for how to officially live to eat just like myself.  I am warning you heading into this weekend, that eating like I do isn’t for everybody.  No faint of heart are recommended for this foodie adventure.  

Photo from etsy.com

I just woke up a few minutes ago and have to say that my stomach isn’t feeling too hot.  I pulled my usual friday night late night food raid that consisted of a concoction of eggs, chocolate ice cream, a peanut butter sandwich at some point.  My sink this morning looks like it had a meltdown while I was asleep last night.  I completely forgot that I ate myself into a food coma and decided to wait until the morning to deal with the dishes.  Now as I write this, my sink is staring me smack in the face and it doesn’t seem to pleased, or clean for that matter.  I love the eating part, but I seem to have a brain fart everytime it boils down to doing the dishes.  This is probably why I ended up starting an on demand food delivery company so long ago.  In the dorm rooms freshmen year there wasn’t a sink to do dishes in.  My dishes back then consisted of plasticware and paper plates.  Weekends in college as a freshmen revolving around food mostly consisted of pizza and chinese delivery.  There used to be a convenience store attached to my dorm called the Cstore, in which you can get anything from ramen to pop-tarts, to frozen eggo waffles.  I never understood why they offered frozen items for freshmen.  I will always remember that infamous george forman grill that I unwisely decided to bring with me to Indiana University my freshmen year.  One day I was craving a grilled cheese, so I took a stroll down to the cstore and grabbed some wonder bread and cheese.  I went to begin preparing the grilled cheese after plugging in the george forman and the circuit broke.  A mini fire ensued that was luckily contained by three or four bottles of dasani water that I had handy.  Nonetheless I think that was the straw that broke the camels back when I realized a chef wasn’t my true calling.  All those high school home economic classes clearly didn’t pay off.  Mrs Grimes I thought I was a model cooking student, what happened?  

Photo from pinterest.com

After taking a trip down nostalgia lane lets back to the present weekend at hand, twelve years later.  Currently I am thirty years old, living in Boulder, Colorado sipping on my coffee as I finish up this post and digest the last of my fridge and freezer raid last night.  I will be venturing out on a long run in a few minutes just so I can burn a ton of calories to justify going to town on an endless brunch later.  Tonight I am taking a nurse out on a date that I matched with on Tinder.  We are going out for Indian food, so I already plan on going to town on some naan bread and tandoori chicken.  If I am feeling ballsy I might even throw some samosas into the mix.   On first dates I am the one that usually breaks the ice by ordering the entire menu, and spilling some chicken tikka masala on my white shirt.  I have to get into the habit of wearing darker shirts when I go on dates from now on.  Not only do I live to eat and get into weekend food comas alot, but dishes aren’t my friends, and you will be hard pressed to find me get through a meal without spilling something on my shirt or pants.  Can somebody get me a food bib for tonight?    

Photo from amazon.com 

So today will be filled with a heavy brunch, and a dinner that could have a dessert thrown into the equation.  If the date is off to a good start I will naturally propose ice cream for dessert.   Then tomorrow is sunday, so its naturally chinese feast time.  Although I did do dim sum yesterday, but I never get sick of dumplings!   I think about food more than anything in life.  

[lodel-local-delivery]

Dorm life with grilled cheese

Freshmen year in college seems like it was yesterday.  I have always been a major foodie and will never forget my first day in the dorms.  I brought a mini fridge with me and one of those tiny george forman grills.  There was a convenience store that was nicknamed the “C” store that was attached to my dorm.  This was the year before I started an on demand food delivery website called Btownmenus.com at Indiana University.  So back then I was stuck with wonder bread, kraft cheese, and a bunch of ramen.  

Photo from seriouseats.com 

I was fortunate to have been roomed with a guy that had a girlfriend that lived on another part of campus.  He literally spent one night the entire year in my dorm.  Therefore I had plenty of space, and being not the most neat of kids, this was a major relief for me.  My stomach began to churn as I was unpacking all of clothes and belongings into Briscoe Gucker, room 508 back in august of 2004.  I quickly thought to myself that a grilled cheese would be the perfect snack until I would head to the cafeteria with some of the guys that I had just met on my floor.  I plugged the george foreman grill into the wall, grabbed a couple slices of wonder bread and stuck two pieces of kraft cheese onto the bread.  I then laid the bread onto the grill, closed it and waited for the light to turn from orange to green.  Unfortunately before this came to fruition, there must have been a short circuit because I saw a quick spark and the lights went out.  Not only had the lights gone out in my dorm room, but it seemed to have knocked out the power in the entire dorm!   My grilled cheese was burnt to a crisp, but I ate it like a champ and headed to the cafeteria as I stared back at a pitch black dorm.  

Photo from ebay.com