#bsf!miles x reader
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— texts with bsf!miles (42 or 1610)
a/n: these were so funny to make help
#junie’s works ᥫ᭡#bestfriend miles x reader#bsf!miles x reader#miles morales x reader#miles morales x fem!reader#miles morales x black!reader#miles morales headcanons#earth 42 miles x reader#miles 1610 x reader#across the spiderverse headcanons
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hidden away
pairing: brother's bsf! rafe cameron x reader
genre: smutsmutsmut, minors DNI!!! / oral (m receiving)
synopsis: your brother's best friend convinces you to give him head in a closet
word count: 1.9k
a/n: part three of brother’s best friend but can be read as a standalone!
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩
Music blared in your headphones as you closed the front door behind you, a heart-shaped lollipop between your lips, still on a high from spending time with your friends, moving your body along to the music that came from your headphones, one of your favorite songs playing as you kicked your shoes off of your feet and made your way to the kitchen.
However, when you arrived at the kitchen doorway, you almost let out a loud yelp, startled by a blonde guy you had never met before standing at the fridge. As he turned to face you, you removed your headphones and put them down on the counter, now hearing faint music coming from the living room. "Who are you?" you asked him, your brows furrowed, and you could basically see the lightbulb above his head light up in realization. "Oh, I'm Topper, one of Scott's friends." The stranger said with a smile. "You're his sister, right? We're hanging out in the living room."
You scoffed, storming off to the living room, hell-bent on giving your older brother a piece of his mind about how even if your parents were away, it didn't mean that he had free range to have his friends over at whatever time he'd please, and if he didn't get his friends out of the house, you'd-
Your train of thought was cut off when you felt yourself bumping into someone's broad chest, a pair of piercing blue eyes looking down at you accompanied by that same grin you could make out from a mile away, causing the annoyance in your chest to die down as you cleared your throat, stepping away from him.
"Rafe." You said his name softly, the self-satisfied grin on his face only widening further as he placed his hands on your waist to help keep you steady, causing you to furrow your brows and look up at him like he was insane. "What on Earth are you doing?"
"What's wrong?" He arched his brow suggestively, his hands slowly moving to your hips as his tongue flicked out of the mouth you had gotten to know quite well as of late. The tall blonde brought his lips close to your ear, causing shivers to run down your spine as he whispered into your ear, "From what I remember, you were asking for much more the last time I saw you."
You were suddenly attacked by memories of his head between your legs, of him pressing kisses down your neck as he fucked into you, making you tremble and-
Forcing yourself to stop thinking about what had happened, you tugged him by his hand to the closest door, forcefully pulling him inside and closing the door before realizing you had just trapped yourself into a small broom closet, Rafe's semi-hard cock now pressing into your abdomen as the blonde sported a shit-eating grin on his face, leaning down slightly to bring his lips closer to yours.
You put your hands on his chin, keeping his lips away from yours as you looked into his eyes sternly, "Rafe, you can't just... put your hands on me when anyone could see us, especially my brother. He'd kill you if he found out what we've been doing behind his back."
"I could easily take him. It's not my fault you look so fuckin' tempting... You wear those shorts just for me, or what?" The boy grinned, bringing his hands down to cup your ass, pulling you closer to his body. "Rafe," you looked up at him, noticing that his pupils were dilated and his eyes slightly pink, "are you high right now?"
"Just a tiny bit." Rafe grinned, taking your chin between his index finger and thumb, "But that doesn't change how much I wanna fuck you right now..." He sighed, one of his hands slipping under the hem of your shirt, the feeling of his cool hands against the bare skin of your back, your breath catching in your throat as your back automatically arched into his touch.
"Rafe..." You sighed, his lips finding their way onto your neck, latching onto the skin as you wrapped your arms around him, wanting nothing more than to give into him, to give in to the arousal you could feel stirring inside of you. "Rafe, we can't..."
"Come on, you know you want to..." He whispered, sucking on your neck slightly, the suddenness and intensity of it causing you to let out a small whimper, "I heard that cute little noise... You clearly want it..."
"It's not about that." You said, forcefully pulling him away from your neck, Rafe grinning at the red mark he had left on the skin on your neck before his gaze finally roved over to your eyes, the blonde cocking his head to the side expectantly, silently implying you to give him the reason to your refusal. You sighed, knowing just how insistent he could be, so muttered your reasoning quietly, causing Rafe to furrow his brows.
"Princess, you know I can't hear you."
You rolled your eyes, looking at him with an irritated expression, "I'm on my period, Rafe."
"So?" Rafe shrugged, making you widen your eyes, "You know, I hear that orgasms help with cramps." He grinned, and you softly smacked his forearm, the blonde feigning offense with a small laugh, "I'm just trying to be of assistance!"
"Well, unfortunately, I'm not really into period sex. Even the idea of that mess..." You shiver dramatically, causing him to chuckle as Rafe rests his head against the wall of the broom closet, looking at you pleadingly. "What?"
"Well, could you at least... suck me off or something?" Rafe asks, pouting at you pleadingly, the fakeness of the gesture causing you to roll your eyes in exasperation. "Princess, it's been two weeks since I last saw you, I need something... I'll make it up to you, I promise..."
"How?"
"By returning the favor to you when you're no longer on your period..." He said in a gruff voice, biting down on his lower lip as he sized you up, clearly enjoying the sight of you in nothing but your frayed denim shorts and tank top, "Until you've come on my tongue so many times that you can't even remember your own name."
When the words left his lips, you could feel your breath hitch in your throat, the memory of his mouth sucking greedily on your clit still vivid in your mind as you stepped closer to him, pressing your chest against his, looking up at him through your lashes. "Promise?"
He placed his hand on your jaw before bringing his lips down to yours, kissing you intensely, his hand going to your hair, running his fingers through it softly before pulling away, his kiss still leaving you just as dizzy as it had the first time he had kissed you. "Promise." He said huskily, bringing your hand to the front of his pants, the blonde letting out a hiss as you palmed his erection through them.
Within seconds, you were on the floor of the broom closet, on your knees in front of Rafe as he looked down at you, his pants at his ankles, the blonde quietly groaning as you palmed him through his boxers. He held onto one of the shelves as he threw his head back, more than eager for you to finally stop teasing him. "Come on..." Rafe breathed out, making you chuckle softly before finally giving in, pulling down his boxers to let his hardened cock spring free.
You spit onto your hand, wrapping it around the base of his long cock and giving him a few strokes, the boy letting out ragged breaths as he opened his eyes to look down at you, mouth open as you were preparing to take him into your mouth, his hands running through your hair as before gathering it all into a makeshift ponytail.
When you licked a stripe up the vein running across the underside of his cock, he couldn't help but shiver and slightly tug on your hair as your lips wrapped around the sensitive head of his cock, your tongue darting to get the drop of precum that had leaked onto his tip into your mouth.
With your cheeks hollowed out, you looked up at him with half-lidded eyes, a wave of arousal washing over you as you took half of him into your mouth, bobbing your head at a slow pace as your hand was at the base of his cock, stroking the part of his cock that you hadn't yet managed to get into your mouth.
The fact that you hadn't been able to take all of him into his mouth didn't seem to bother Rafe, though, the blonde's head thrown back in pleasure as you picked up your pace, and when he tugged your hair, you couldn't help the small moan you let out around his cock, causing vibrations to go through all throughout his body, his cock twitching in your mouth as he groaned your name, "Fuck, you're so good..."
When you finally dared to take even more of him into your mouth, his grip on your hair tightened once again and a small whine left his lips, the sound going straight to your core, the sight of the pleasure you were giving him turning you on.
Once you had all of him in your mouth, you gagged around him when the swollen head of his cock hit the back of your throat, causing tears to well up in your eyes. You picked up your pace, Rafe biting down on his lower lip to stop himself from letting out the loud, needy groans that were just begging to get past his lips.
When he let out a shaky breath and tightened the grip he had on your hair, you knew that he was getting close, his already unsteady breaths turning into pants as he opened his eyes, looking down at you with glassy, blue eyes. "Gonna cum in your mouth... Want you to take it all, baby, take all my cum into your pretty mouth..."
You moaned around his cock, causing another wave of vibrations to hit him as he closed his eyes and thrust himself deeper into your mouth, now guiding your head by your hair, the head of his cock now hitting the back of your throat repeatedly until you finally started feeling hot, salty ropes of cum coating your tongue while you helped him ride out his orgasm.
Rafe's eyes fluttered open, looking down at you with a grin as you pulled your lips away from his cock, his grip on your hair loosening as he ran his hand through your hair gently before his index finger and thumb went to your chin, making you look up at him. "Open your mouth."
You felt shivers run down your spine from the commanding tone of his voice, and you did as he told you to, showing him that his release was coating your tongue, the blonde boy letting out a low groan. "Swallow." He said hoarsely, and you closed your mouth, swallowing his cum.
He helped you to your feet, looking down at you with a small grin as he shook his head, pulling his boxers and pants back on. "Do you know how adorable you look when you do what I tell you to?"
Rafe's hand is on your cheek, and you lean into his touch as he brings his lips closer to yours, but just as your lips are about to connect with his, you hear a familiar voice outside of the closet.
"Rafe?" Your brother called out, causing all of the color to drain from your cheeks as you looked up at Rafe with wide eyes.
#outer banks fanfiction#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe smut#outerbanks rafe#rafe fanfiction#rafe outer banks#rafe x reader#rafe x you#rafe fic#rafe imagine#rafe obx#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron smut#outer banks fic#outer banks smut#outer banks
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𝑯EART 𝑊ORM ⸺ hueningkai ℘˒´ˎ˗
⨾𓍢ִ໋ ˒˒ 𝚑𝔢art𝚠𝔬rm
[𝑛]. a relationship or friendship that you can't get out of your head, which you thought had faded long ago but is still somehow alive and unfinished, like an abandoned campsite whose smoldering embers still have the power to start a forest fire.
⸺ listen to the playlist .ᐟ ‧˚
〝﹙ 📼 ﹚“I was just... wondering,” you say, blood roaring. "Well, Yeonjun wants me to come over to his place this weekend, and... I’ve never...” Sucking in a quick breath, you just spit it out to get it over with, “Would you be my first kiss, Kai?” ˛ 、、
wc ➛ 17.9k
𝔭airings childhood bsf!kai x reader (lowkey soulmates?) ⤷ ft. asshole!yeonjun x reader
𝒢 ; smut ˒ angst ˒ some fantasy
𝔴arnings angst, family issues, fingering, jealousy (i’m sorry i just love ts), yeonjun really is an asshole, orgasm denial, thigh fucking, unprotected sex (they're stupid!), strength kink a lil bit, breeding kink, possessiveness, creampie, choking... i think that's all, lmk if i missed any
✎୭ ashlynn's note omg. this was such a fun palate cleanser to write. this wasn't supposed to be as big as it is, but it just kept getting bigger and bigger, and i got super into the story. this kai is SOOOO!! yeah. i’m so nervous posting this because i’ve only ever posted TSFAWC, but…. here you areee (^^;; this is not proofread, so if you see a mistake... give me a sec. i'll get to it. hehe
Though you fan your hand furiously over your face, the little breezes washing over your clammy skin are not enough. The air is thick and heavy with summer’s heat. So thick that you almost feel it each time you swallow. It’s better than just letting yourself melt away, though. The cushion at your back doesn’t help much. It holds your warmth and returns it to you the longer you sit slumped back into it. You suffer it though—you’ve gone too sluggish to move.
You let a leg dangle over the arm of a chair, watching a hopeful moth dance in the light of the buzzing porch light overhead. It flutters frantically in it, making a grand fight to reach that false moonlight, only to drop away when it realizes that it’s being burnt. You watch it rinse and repeat, relentless and sure, for who knows how long. It’s no special moth—no luna moth or the ones with the pretty pink wings—but the light falls down on it and colors it a pleasant stardust silver.
You delight in letting your conscious brain turn off to watch it. It lets you forget the sweltering under your skin, and also that Kai had drug you out here. His dad gives him shit when he plays inside, but it’s way too hot to be out here. Isn’t it supposed to cool off after the sun goes down? It doesn’t feel like it. The deep acoustics are drowned out each time a car whirrs by. Playing outside should be the best option, but you and Kai live right on a busy road.
When the roar of some car going ten miles over the speed limit doesn’t obscure his playing, though, you admire the intricacy of it. His fingers work up and down the neck, jumping frets that you imagine would be impossible to anybody without those long fingers of his. You had always been a loud supporter of his playing, even way back when the most he could play were simple chords, but you became especially so when a few years back he put a guitar in your hands and tried teaching you. Even with his fingers guiding yours, it was quick to learn that the effortlessness with which Kai handles the instrument is hard earned.
He practices on the acoustic guitar, but that’s not his domain. With houses just a dash across the street from each other, Kai had grown up at your home more than he had at his own. So vividly, you remember the stars in his eyes when he’d listen to your dad’s music. Metallica, The Smashing Pumpkins, Linkin Park, any of it. He had fallen in love with it a long time ago. Your whole life you knew that it was only a matter of time before he was in his own band, chasing his dreams with a boundless mind and an indelible vision of himself on stage. How had that time come so soon, though? You don’t know if the notebooks full of inky lyrics that live wherever he deems inspiration might hit him make you proud or nervous. He’s making good on his dazzling aspirations, and you?
You speak finally into the air, cutting through heat waves and his music and the night. “Isn’t it weird that we’re not going back to school after this summer?”
He doesn’t have to even stop playing to answer you. Playing comes to him as a second nature. “Kinda,” he answers, brown eyes flitting up to you. “But it’s not like you won’t be back to it in September. College is the same shit.”
The leg you’d been dangling and bouncing pauses. That’s right; you’re supposed to be going to that college you’d chosen because it was only a three-hour drive away from here. You pluck at the seat’s threadbare fabric, and the moth, still there, becomes oh-so-interesting once again. When his playing stops, you drop your head back with a cushioned thud and a groan that you wrangle in your throat.
“Why are you acting like that?” he says, voice gone sharp like accusation. He doesn’t even know the truth, but he’s known you too long.
Can’t you just keep secrets for yourself, sometimes?
Kai, arms clad in a well-loved hoodie even in this dreadful weather, lays the guitar down. You maintain your silence. “Seriously, what?”
Some secrets have timers, though. This one could only last you until about September, or even August when he realizes that you’re not preparing to return to school. A controlled sigh from your chest isn’t enough to soothe the nerves that sparks. “Nothing.”
“Secrets, huh?” Kai says. When you do finally look to him, black spikes of hair frame his eyes and the accusation in them.
It’s a simple poke, but it gets under your skin as sharp as any thorn might. It’s not like you don’t keep secrets from him, and you’re sure he keeps some from you too. But those are the little kinds, the inconsequential ones—like I ate already when asked why you’re not eating or like Yeah, I’m fine when it’s been a bad day. You don’t hide this kind of stuff from each other. Usually, you’d run over to his place to tell him whatever’s bothering you. Why not, when he’s known even the worst details of your life for almost the entirety of it? You’ve been holding this one close to your chest since somewhere around the end of senior year, though. The longer you let it fester, the worse your nervousness snowballs. “C’mon, Kai. Let’s not do this. Can you keep playing?”
He doesn’t like that, of course. But you watch recognition dawn over his chocolate brown eyes, helpless to stop it. “You’re not going,” he says. It’s not a question nor a suspicion, it’s a bone-dry fact.
Well. There that goes. You want to tear every hair on your head right out. Why had you even thought you’d keep him in the dark about it? When he’s not out in some garage making music, you two are together. The conversation was going to stroll by at some point; this was only inevitable. His disappointment radiates off him in waves and blisters you. He hasn’t even said anything yet, but you know exactly what he thinks of it. It’s why you kept it from him in the first place.
Your silence is enough confirmation for him. “Why?” he says. “I thought you were excited to move out.”
Wincing, you nod slowly. You were. Even went through the whole application process, along with most other kids your age. Ultimately, you never went through with declaring a college. You don’t exactly know why, but somewhere weaseled down in the shadowy recesses of your soul, you know. Taking those steps, the massive and terrifying ones from adolescence into adulthood, meant agreeing that this form of your life was over. It meant that at some point, you’d be moving away from here to where living your days away in Kai’s room would not be a choice. Everybody has to do it eventually, you know that. Kai’s music gig could take off any day, too. He’s going to make it happen. And then what? All this stalling and wishing on just a bit more time would mean nothing, he’d be off and chasing that dream. As excited as you are for it to finally become reality for him, there’s a nasty bitterness that’s budded in your chest, infecting your person.
Can’t things just stay like this?
“I was,” you say. It comes out of your mouth heavy.
“Then why aren’t you going?” he says. Crickets, never seen but always heard, sing their song into the night’s darkness. “You didn’t get rejected. You’re too smart for that.”
An ache sits heavily somewhere near the center of your chest, maybe over your heart. All those good grades, nights spent bent over a desk and AP paperwork—you’re wasting it. You shake your head. “No... just...” It’s an effort to dress your thoughts in a way that might appease him. A quiet moment stretches with your thinking before you continue, “I don’t know what I want to do.”
He doesn’t like that, the yellow wash of the overhead light dancing over his taut lips and hard eyes. “Don’t know what you want to do?” he says, bringing his legs up onto the seat to crisscross them. He wears his favorite jeans. They’re heel-bitten and baggy enough over his legs that he can wear them around the house without any bother. “You’ve wanted to be an artist your whole life. You know exactly what you want to do.”
Your chest only seems to ache harder. When the both of you were only young and hopeful, you both had big dreams. Kai was going to be the face of a metal band, and you were going to be an artist. A painter, potter, sculptor, even doing animation for those big companies like Dreamworks and Disney. You wanted any of it, just as long as you were doing art. You’d even promised him that you’d do the cover art for his albums with interlocked pinkies and flushed, hopeful cheeks. That passion and love wasn’t gone from you, it blazed strong in your veins. This blaze wasn’t the kind that kept you warm and excited to push forward into life, though. It had morphed into something that scalded you when you got too close or started imagining yourself pursuing its call. It’s a taunting silvery glow, no longer a guiding north star. Taunting words of family members stamped down on that hope hard. When you were little, it was said lighthearted and in passing. The older you got, though, the more serious their faces became. They wouldn’t say it outright perhaps, but you hear what they think well enough. Art is a dead-end career.
Shifting in your seat, you tell him, “I don’t know.”
“What do you mean?” Kai says. “There are good colleges for that.”
“I just... don’t know.”
Shaking his head, he tells you, “But you love it.”
You do. In its every form, you love creating. But loving it doesn’t mean that it’s right for you, or that you should trust your future in its hands. “I think I can do it in my own time,” you say, finally pushing yourself upright from the cushion. “Don’t wanna kill the passion by doing it for a living, you know?”
He thinks on that for a moment. “If you love it, you should do it,” he says.
An awful frustration bubbles in your chest. Kai has always had a clear life path, the steps ahead of him set in stone and waiting for him to follow in them. It’s hard for him to see why you might not want to do the same. There’s nothing that makes you as happy as the fact that he has it all figured out, that he knows just where he’s going and that he’s so incredible at it that he doesn’t have to worry about meeting the requirements, but your path seems obscured and untrodden. Punctuating a deep, resonant sigh, you say, “It’s not that easy, Kai.”
“If you’re not doing that, then what are you going to do? Are you just going to settle for a nine-to-five?” he says full of accusation, the tapping on his knees gone still.
A dry laugh, you say, “Maybe I’ll marry a super rich guy and just do my art for a living. No nine-to-five.”
His face flashes. He’d always been a bit reserved, especially around others, but he bared his emotions freely around you. You hold them dearly to your chest and made sure to do your best to make good on that trust. He says, “You’re more than some guy’s housewife.”
Cheeks radiating in the heat, you snort. “I know, dork. I’m a rockstar’s best friend. It’s my personal favorite achievement.”
His face sours when you reach out and pinch hard at his cheek, but he doesn’t pull away or brush you off. The skin there is warmed and clammy. Really, the two of you should go meet the cool AC inside before you suffer heat stroke. But this moment feels so nice—your shoulders feel tons lighter without something to hide. If you had it your way, things would stay like this forever. Just the two of you, sat here like you have so many times before, just taking for granted the time you’ve got together.
His mouth opens to banter, probably something about how he’s not a rockstar yet or to get you back for calling him a dork. Wingbeat and sterling dashes about your face send the image into a blur, though. You’re a quick mess of limbs and a whipping head, as if it’ll chase the thing away from you.
“Seriously?” Kai says. You’d climbed halfway over him, elbows digging into him and knee doing a number on his thigh. “It’s a moth. You’re not scared of moths.”
Lingering for a few moments later to ensure the flying thing was nowhere on you or around you, you hold back a laugh before you climb off him and fix your hair with undignified tucks behind your ears. “He was in my face,” you say around a laugh, because you know it was a bit too much. Nobody likes wings in their ears and spindly legs in their face, though, and you’re in no control of what you do when anything with six legs tries and get too friendly. Even moths.
“You just wanted me to protect you,” he says. A sarcastic, shit-eating smile tugs at the corners of his mouth.
“Oh,” you scoff, batting your eyelashes and clasping your hands together all saccharine-sweet. “Yes, Romeo, won’t you kill that bug for me? This girl’s heart just can’t take it!”
Kai’s nose crinkles, and the playful light twists into a glare. “Nasty.”
“That’s how you sounded,” you say. “I only reacted accordingly.” Laughing, you kick your legs out over his lap and sprawl back out. He takes the guitar back into his hands.
As much as you want to escape the mugginess, you’ll survive it for just a little while longer—if only with the force of an indulgent heart. The eternal moments are those you allow to linger.
⚝⭒
Some things, you forget when you’re older. Maybe it’s time’s hand, eroding memories down and stuffing more in the longer you live to experience them. But also maybe because they’re the sort of things you can’t say in the adult world without a laugh in the face and a look from down their noses.
This memory is one of those forgotten things. It’s moth-bitten and dusty, something you one day folded up in a moving box and decided to never revisit.
You’d been down at the creek. Kai and you had spent so many summer days there. It wasn’t too far from home, just past the filbert trees and into the shallow neck of the backwoods, but there you were out of sight and free to get up to nothing good. It was a wonder your mom ever let you do it. Kai’s dad didn’t care too much where he went or what he did, but your mom dug her claws in deep. You like to think that she imagined you two would have each other, if anything ever happened.
Usually, you’d be there holding your jeans up from the stream and Kai would be letting his jeans go dark with it. The bite of water was nice as it washed over warm skin. Fun was a simple thing to find, then. You dug your fingers into the mudbanks and tossed stones way too big to be throwing at each other, just because you two remembered how much the adults hated it when you did. Then, you’d drag tired limbs home avoiding sweetgum tree spikes that had fallen to the ground and dug splinters out from your feet.
This day, you had been in the blackberry bushes. It was maybe late July or early August, and they’d gotten heavy on their branches. You’d waited until the smell of them, summer-warmed, was sweet and cloying in the air to pick them. With buckets in your hands, you plucked only the fattest berries from their bunches. Your fingers were stained a delightful purple and perhaps a bit thorn raw, but you didn’t mind much then. You plucked for hours, and it was dusk before you could catch it. Dinner was no doubt waiting for you back home.
“There’s a bunch over here,” Kai had said. He reached a long boyish arm, still awkward and lanky with puberty, up high for ripe bush. You finished off picking before climbing around thick branches sticking out to take a peek. A bunch, there was.
When you went to drop a handful of them into your bucket, Kai hissed. He’d been snagged by a vicious looking branch, those ones as thick as a finger with thorns to match and you’d warn each other tongue-in-cheek to watch out for that one. He’d worn those ridiculous shorts that day, the ones that looked half pants half shorts with how long and baggy they were, and the claws of the bush had jumped at the opportunity. At first the scrapes were white, but then red blood crawled out and down his leg.
“Kai,” you said, some parts chiding and some parts just wondering how he’d managed that. You surveyed his leg for a bit, and then determined that he should wash his leg off in the stream. He walked there strong, but of course you noticed the hobble beneath his acting. When you squatted down into the dry grass and cupped water to wash off his leg, you laughed.
“What?” he had said, holding the shorts up. You covered your laugh with a hand, but it erupted past your palm. You remember the glare on his face very well.
You still laughed. “You’re stupid,” you had told him.
“I didn’t see it,” he said. “I tripped over it because it was sticking out.”
That time when you brought your hands to catch some water, there was a twinkle in its surface. You didn’t notice it for a second. The creek moved fast and you could see a lot of things in its reflection. When it lingered, that’s when your brows furrowed. It seemed to twirl, dancing around like alive over the stones.
The sound of Kai’s voice remains with you. “Hey,” he had said, strong to call your attention but also wavered with uncertainty.
When you looked up, there was silver dust dancing around you.
It was fluffy and whorling, fine silver stardust. It’d moved weightless in the air, as though it barely existed. In the center of it were a few moths. They seemed to be made of sterling powder just as the dust was, and they glowed against dusk’s backdrop. If your memory serves you right, there had been a sweet hymn of coos from them. They beckoned you. Summer’s heat felt lighter, and so did your chest. You wondered where they had wanted you to go.
Almost afraid that if you spoke they might have fluttered away, you whispered soft and low to Kai. “What is that?” He was stood frozen there, pant leg still scrunched up in his fist. Stardust glowed soft in his brown eyes while he took it all in, you remember. It wasn’t a scared frozen. You weren’t scared, either—rather, it was as if that lightness had found its way into the core of your being and brushed over it with mending hands.
He whispered back, “I don’t know.” How could he have known? It was absurd.
Those whisps had beckoned you, flowing toward the deeper woods. The soft moths, their murmuring brushing up against your ears, seemed to wait for you to follow. You remember a pull, soft tendrils wrapping themselves around your heart and the yearning it planted there.
But there was also this reluctance, a bone-deep answering that had told you: No. You’re not ready.
“Kai, I wanna go,” you told him.
You didn’t even need to tell him twice. Berry buckets forgotten; the journey home was a stranger one. When your dad asked why you returned from berry picking emptier handed than you had left the house, Kai and you only shared a look. You pair kept that evening at the creek hidden so well that it became more forgotten than shared secret.
⚝⭒
Once, you had been the type of girl that loved being around family. Some of your favorite days of your life were spent in this living room, T.V. roaring over bouncing conversation. Some of those nights ended in rosy cheeks and laughs, and some ended with words thrown angry like fireworks. You never knew which you’d be getting, but you endured the fear of not knowing because it was a simple love—the basic kind built with biology into you the moment your infant skin touched your mother’s. You endured it because eventually, sleep washed away the bad taste left in your mouth and you forgave them quick, sometimes quicker than you ought to, and things would go on as if it hadn’t even happened. You endured it because you could handle its burden, if only to feel the warmth you feel when it’s a good day.
Kai was always there—his dad was hardly home, so he found family in yours. When you were younger, you’d been embarrassed he was there for caustic, spitted words and intimate fights. Now, you’re just grateful for his shoulder.
So, yes. Once, you had loved being around your family. But things feel tenser now, nights spent all together less frequent and when they do happen, they’re tainted by a strange air. You think that this strangeness is new, but an awful worry also makes you think that it’d always been there, that you only feel it now because you’ve grown into your adult mind. A hollow ache stakes its claim in your chest, declaring that it won’t leave until you find that youthful ignorance and joy once more. You think that it might stay there forever.
Bare feet bounding down the stairs, you make a rare appearance downstairs. The cupboard is only half open to make way for a snack raid before your mom’s voice cuts through the air. You know quickly just by the look on her face that you should’ve stayed upstairs.
“Hey,” she says, gathering laundry into a basket. “You’ve been applying to jobs?”
With an anxious belly, you tell her, “Yeah. A few. They’re not really, like, ideal, but I sent applications.” You don’t remember when it got hard to look into your mother’s eyes, but you can’t bring yourself to do so now.
“Not ideal?” she says. “It’s not like you can be picky. Mcdonalds or wherever, I don’t care, you’re going to need to get a job if you’re staying here.”
“I know. I applied,” you reiterate around a mumble. You close the cabinets, not so interested in a snack anymore. “I just... I don’t know, ma. I don’t want to do that for a living, going between those sorts of jobs.”
Face hard and abrasive against the truth you bare, she does that awful taunting smile that makes you feel small. Stupid. “You’re not going to college, so that’s what it’s gonna be. You can’t sit up there and draw for a living. You’ve gotta get into the real world, get some real experience.”
There’s a burst of hurt in your chest, dazzling and gnawing. She’s getting closer to saying how she really feels about your dreams out loud every day. Your face burns and so do your eyes, knot thick in your throat. “Yeah, okay. Got it,” you say, nodding. You’re at the front door before you even know it, slipping on shoes and fighting the greatest internal battle to will back tears. She’d use those against you, no doubt about it. “I’m going to Kai’s,” you throw over your shoulder.
Whatever she barks back at you, you’re glad you don’t hear. Bells on some old Christmas decoration hung on the door that had yet to be taken down, even into summer, jingle and wash it away for you.
Kai’s brows shoot up when he opens the door to your face crumpling. You’d done so well at damming it up, but the wall cracks and the water crashes through once you see him. If it were anybody else, you’d feel icky and attention seeking, but you’d held Kai to your chest through gut-wrenching sobs as much as he’s done it for you. Without question, he takes you into his arms, warm hand running up and down your back. The warm soothing is so familiar. You melt right into it.
He keeps you there for a long moment. Then, his chest rumbles as he tells you, “Come on.” The walk through the AC to his bedroom is nice. Having a house like Kai’s to come to where it can just be you is nice, too. You step around the mess of clothes and scattered belongings on his floor like you have a muscle-memory roadmap of his room. Boxsprings creak and hard mattress welcome you back home. His room is dark as always, a night-dweller you call him. The array of peeling band posters plastered over walls you two had painted blue some years ago, when it’d been his favorite color, don’t help to lighten it up. He keeps a low lamplight on.
“She never listens to me,” you say, crying gone to occasional sniffles from your chest. You rest your cheek on your bent knee.
“I know,” he says. “But at least she cares about you. Pays attention to you.” His voice is soft and deep and right next to you. Always right next to you, there for you even when you might not appreciate it as you should.
His dad cares too little what he does, and yours care too much. The grass is always greener on the other side, you know it. Still, you hold a fantasy where you’re able to do teenager stuff. Where you’d allow yourself to do bad things, because you weren’t so intent on painting yourself with their will. You two hold eyes for a long moment, your twinkling ones caught in that steady brown. “I just want to get away. Be my own person.” Your words are muffled in the softness of your skin.
“You had the chance to do it,” Kai says, hand playing with your fingers. “But you didn’t.”
Holding your legs closer, you lick your lips. What do you say to that? Would it ever be the time to tell him that you did it because you think that your soul is pathetically intertwined with his, and that it might snuff your lifeforce out to even try pursuing life without him? Without this? How do you tell him that you’re so frozen and unwilling to pursue any sort of future because it means accepting that this chapter is over? You clutch childhood to your chest like a wild animal guarding scarce food; you refuse. You refuse to acknowledge its end.
“Kai,” is all you say, trembled and thick. It’s not just your mother’s words that dig at you and tear to shreds the last bits of what dreaming you had left in you, but so many other reality checks too. This isn’t the first time you’ve heard those sorts of words, urging you forward. You can only dig your heel into the ground for so long before you’re swept away in time’s ruthless, endless moving.
He understands. Lifting your face with warm fingers against your cheeks, he says, “Hey. How about we go get ice cream, or something?”
Ice cream does sound nice. “Dairy Queen?”
Smirk tugged over his mouth, he says, “Yes, Dairy Queen. A blizzard. C’mon, let’s go.” Sliding off the bed, he offers you an urging hand up.
But you falter. “I don’t know if we can. She’s mad at me. I don’t think she’ll let me go.”
“Let you go?” he says, eyes narrowed. “She doesn’t have to let you go. You’re an adult now, you go if you want to.” He offers his hand to you again.
It’s so him, freely going wherever he ordain it. The bullheadedness is very him, as well. Always the devil on your shoulder, he was the root of any rebellious thing you’ve ever done. He could never understand your apprehension, or why getting in trouble was such an awful thing to you. “I have to ask to get money.”
Brows pinching, he says, “You think I’m not gonna pay for you? You don’t need them to give you money, I’ll pay. I’ll take care of it.” He drags you up from the bed this time. “Live a little. Do you want to go?”
It was never the punishments or the getting in trouble that you were scared of, though. Disappointment was a scarier word than grounded. Sneaking out and those sorts of things, it’s not like you had angel wings at your back and never considered them. It’s that you are deeply, utterly terrified of changing how they look at you. You begin to tell him, “I do, but—”
He cuts you off, adamant. “Then do it. Let’s go. If you want to go, then go,” he says. “At some point, your life needs to become your own. It’s not sneaking out when you’re graduated and eighteen years old, it’s going wherever the hell you want. You’ve... You’re gonna end up stuck here, in this town, forever. You don’t deserve that.”
That sounds like both the best and the worst thing you’ve ever heard. You take his hand.
⚝⭒
Your frozen fingers nurse your ice cream. The cup itself is cold, but the Dairy Queen on your side of town is always thirty degrees below what it should be. It’d always been that way. Even way back when you two couldn’t drive, you’d get dropped off here to escape the melting weather and get a frozen treat with a handful of dollars. Each time, you’d start off sagging with the relief of summer’s weight off your shoulders and left the place shivering and sugar-mouthed.
It’s really only you two in here. You crinkle your nose when he takes a spoonful. “Out of all the flavors...”
Unbothered and no doubt expecting you to say it, he offers you a flat, “You get your flavor, I get mine.” He makes a point of taking an extra-long bite. His lips linger around the red plastic of the spoon and his brows rest high in silent challenge.
The corners of your lips twitch up. “Hmm. Well. I just have a hard time believing that Oreo... or, like, brownie fudge, is right there, and you actually want M&M. I don’t get how M&M your favorite.” A familiar banter falls over your tongues. Your heart buzzes and your cheeks radiate. This is the first you’ve done this all summer, and it’ll be weaning off into fall soon. Any other summer, you would’ve been here on all the hottest days. You hate that Kai’s been so busy with his music; you hate that you can hear the resounding ticks of the clock counting down your time. You also hate that the stubborn depths of you still believe that if you freeze yourself here in stasis that the world will relent and stop along with you.
You look over the sharp lines of Kai’s jawline as it feathers with his chewing, and the broadness of his shoulders where his jacket stretches around it, and the starkness of his collarbones against his chest and the bobbing of his adam’s apple when he swallows. No, time doesn’t stop. Some of him remains the same, though. In it, you see the boy that had love creeping up on you so long ago, with all its aching and all its hope. That freckle on the column of his neck, the bump in his nose leading down to the button tip that beckons your lips to steal a quick kiss.
And, those lips. They’re as soft as ever around the discontented grimace he pulls. “M&M isn’t my favorite.”
With a pursed mouth and patronizing brows arched over your eyes, you say, “Oh, huh. That’s funny, because if my memory serves me right, it’s the only flavor you’ve ordered for the past... six years.”
Kai husks a laugh at that. “That’s because they haven’t had my favorite for years,” he tells you, scooping up the final bit and then pushing it off to the side. “It was a blizzard of the month that they discontinued. The blackberry cheesecake one. I made peace with it, though. It lives on in my heart.” He grins, arms crossed over his chest and his back settled into the booth seat to let you finish your cup.
“Blackberry cheesecake,” you say, voice made taunting. Your nod is slow and taunting, too. “Well, forget M&Ms. Why would blackberry cheesecake be your favorite? Ever?”
His face falters, a moment where something flows over his eyes as if reliving a memory in a few short seconds. Then, he shrugs. “It just is.”
You roll your eyes. “Whatever,” you laugh. “Maybe my palate is unrefined.” Imagining the tarte fruit in purple swirls of ice cream, you’re taken back to a humid July day and the scent of churned mud.
The strange memory unfolds itself quick. As if it were waiting for you to find wherever it’d hidden itself away. With a sharp gasp, you say, “Oh my god, Kai. Do you remember that one day? That weird stuff we saw down at the creek?”
He nods. “Yeah. I was just thinking of that the other day, actually...”
Less interested in finishing your cup now, you let the spoon rest. “What?” you say, the word peaking in the middle. That day hadn’t crossed your mind once since it’d happened. “How weird is that?”
Scoffing a laugh, he says, “Weird, yeah. Just as strange as two kids high on fermented berries.”
That draws a breathy laugh from you. “Is that what you think it was?” you ask him with knitted brows. The berries had been fresh, and you two had popped plenty into your mouth. But no doubt, you’d have spat them right back out if they were that ripe. “I mean, we saw the same thing.”
“It happens to animals all the time. Squirrells, and stuff.” He lends you a gallic shrug. “We just freaked ourselves out. Like that one time you said you saw the shape of something in the dark and we freaked out. And it was clothes.”
Well, hallucinating, in tandem, a glowing mist because you two by chance ate fermented berries is a very long shot. However nonchalant he acts about it, he seems to have thought long and hard about it. Enough to reason it away with some far cry explanation. Would you have even been able to get drunk off a handful of fermented berries? And, god, you’re really sure that you’d have noticed. That taste isn’t really one you just don’t notice.
Whatever. Maybe you were just drunk idiots. That’s a lot easier to swallow, anyway.
“Okay, but you saw that. Did it not look sinister?” you say. With your spoon back in your hand, you punctuate the sentence pointing it at him. “You freaked out with me, too.”
An unsatisfied scowl on his lips, he steals a spoonful of your dessert. You don’t even swat him away—your phone buzzes in your pocket.
Catching sight of who’s calling, you share a long look with Kai. It’s funny, how fast those three white letters scramble you up. When you hesitate to answer, Kai tells you, “Answer.”
You hope she can’t tell you’re not at Kai’s by the refrigerators’ dull buzzing. It’s an effort to tussle that invasive worry back. You’re at Dairy Queen. Getting ice cream with the boy she’s known since childhood. She should clutch her hands and thank the sky that you’re here, not out in some nasty frat house like you could be. You thumb the green button.
Her voice comes through the speaker crackled and asking you to run over to do a quick dish load. For a heartbeat you consider telling her that you will and then start rushing home. Instead, you fork out the truth through resistant lips.
The hangup tone sits heavy on the air between you and Kai. Having listened to the whole thing on speaker, he says, “What was so hard about that? The world didn’t end, did it?”
The plush of your lip takes a hard gnawing. No, it hadn’t. “I know she’s not going to get mad at me for just going here,” you say as you rest your elbows onto the table. “It’s that they’re supporting me right now. I still live under their roof. The more I go around and insist I can do whatever I want, they’ll start reminding me of it.”
His face drawn, he lets his mouth twitch to one side. “Yeah,” he muses. “I never thought yours would be the type to kick you out.”
Kai’s dad had started threating him with getting kicked out years ago, when he first started telling him that he wanted to do music. How many times had he let reluctant tears flow into your shoulder over it? Because music wasn’t a real job? Back then, you’d whispered in his ears that he’d become everything he’d dreamed of and more as your fingers carded through shaggy locks of hair.
“I don’t know,” you say, humming it out noncommittally. “Is your dad still... y’know?”
Nodding slowly, his eyes tell. “Yeah. Always.”
“Because you’re taking the band seriously, now?” you ask.
“Probably. I don’t give a shit what he thinks about it. If I’m just his goddamn problem, I’ll give him what he wants soon enough.” His eyes blaze with promise of it.
It takes a bit out of you to not wince. Kai living anywhere but in the house across from yours is wrong. “I don’t think he necessarily wants that, Kai...” You take his hand in your icy ones, the urge to reach out to him thinly veiled under the guise of searching out warmth. He’d always run warmer than you—your personal heater. “It’s probably because he can see that you’re doing it for real. Not just saying it anymore.”
“Yeah, well,” he spits, “I can’t fucking wait to see what he’ll say to me when I make it. That piece of shit, though, he wouldn’t even care. It’s not like he ever gave a shit about me enough for it to matter.”
But, it matters to you, you want to tell him. You understand his need to throw it all in his face, though. “Is that one label going to sign you? The one you were talking about?”
His tongue darts out to wet dry lips. “They haven’t yet. I don’t know. But I don’t need that money to get out of here, I’ve been working on it.”
“They will,” you say. “But, where would you go? Not too far?” You try and keep it light and playful, even as your heart aches.
“Come with me,” he says. It’s painfully blunt, as if it were that simple. “Let’s go get and apartment; you and me.”
“Kai...” you say. “You don’t have to drag me along because you feel bad.”
The idea doesn’t sound half bad, though.
“What?” His face tightens, as if somewhere under the surface your words had scraped somewhere tender. “You don’t have to stay here forever. Please. I want... I want you to come with me. You wouldn’t have to even tell them; just bring all your stuff and go together. We could do it together. Like we said we would.”
“We were like, five. Everybody tries to pretend running away at five,” you deadpan. It’s a washy attempt at lightening things back up.
Living with him, moving out together, should feel like everything you’ve ever wanted. And, maybe it is. But, he’s not asking you to live with him the way you want him to. Not in the way that your aching heart wishes he would.
Kai doesn’t share the laugh you give him. “Yeah, okay,” he says, leaning into the table.
Perhaps you should consider the potent disappointment he’s terribly masking with a face of indifference, though.
⚝⭒
Slowly, the knots in your belly have worked themselves out. When Kai had dropped you off, they’d been so awful that you felt borderline sick. You sat the whole ride there in his old beat-up truck picking at your nails and rambling to him. He listened to you the whole time. And then when it was time to walk in, it had least felt a little easier to do so with his eyes on you, watching to make sure you made it in safely.
You’d gotten a job. It’s not too bad, folding clothes out on display. It would be nice if they kept the lights a bit brighter, but you’ll get used it eventually, you hope.
Most of your coworkers are around your age, but the one showing you the ropes... your heart had fluttered.
“You’ll get it,” Yeonjun says. The smile you find on his lips once he straightens up from placing product on a display is smooth and smug. Sleek strands of black hair fall over his eyes. You fluster under his gaze.
With arms crossed over your chest you say, “Yeah, probably.” You reach into the cardboard box for stock to practice on.
“Where’d you work before this?” he asks, leaning back into a wall to watch you. Suddenly, you make sloppier work of your folding. “Your first retail job?”
Some obnoxious pop song falls down from the speakers over the store. Nobody’s in here yet, thankfully; you’ve got some time to try and get a handle on everything. “No, this is my first job. I was so nervous walking in.”
Interest catches in his eyes. It encourages that smooth smile on his lips further. “Don’t worry, sweetheart, I’ll show you the reins.”
Your mind stalls. The suggestive, sly flicker to it—are you looking too much into it? Maybe that’s just how guys like Yeonjun act. It’s hard to pretend that you don’t see how he’s looking at you, though. It has your belly twisted up in fluttery knots. It’s not like you hadn’t had your share of his type. But, for some reason you’d rather not address, he’s got your heart thumping in your chest.
He laughs at your fifth attempt to fold up the shirt. When he takes it from you to help, he smells of musk and vetiver. “You going to college near here?” he continues.
“Nah, just doing this, I guess,” you answer, watching him fold it up to try and soak it up.
“Really? Why not?” he hums, crossing his arms about his chest. “You seem like a smart girl.”
Buffering, your blood buzzes in your veins and your cheeks burn. “Dunno. Not really sure what to do. Are you in college?”
“Nah. I’m trying to figure things out, too.”
The both of you pop your heads up when the bell rings to announce the arrival of a customer.
“Yeah,” you say, eyeing him. He’s a few years older than you, no doubt, and yet his life hasn’t fallen apart because he’s not done anything grand yet.
Time’s hand around your neck loosens. Just a little bit.
⚝⭒
You sit crisscrossed on top of Kai’s bedsheets. He’d thrown the windows open because the AC died, but it’s no help. The hot air wafting about the room sits heavy on your skin. You’d dressed in as little material as possible to let it breathe, bare thighs clad in a pair of loose shorts and a thin tank top, but it’s still miserable.
Perhaps you two should be going over to yours, but you haven’t had time alone with him for a few weeks now. You hate this busier life, where you struggle to make room for this.
Your new job isn’t so awful, though. Especially with Yeonjun there. A bout of nerves flows up through your stomach. That reminds you.
Sitting up a bit straighter, you consider not doing it. In fact, you really shouldn’t. But your mouth moves before you can put a stopper on it.
“Hey, Kai,” you say. The thickness in your throat makes you believe that your heart’s jumped up into it, caught. God, what are you doing? The unsure waver in your words has you regretting.
His eyes flicker up to yours. He hums out a, “Huh?”
No, this is wrong. You mess with the thin cotton strap of your tank top where it’d slipped down. “Never mind,” you tell him, trying to shrug it off.
That piques his interest. “No, what?” His brow pinches.
You lick your lips and shake your head. “Nothing, never mind. Really.”
His eyes search you from where he sits up against the wall. “Tell me,” he demands.
Really, you shouldn’t have said it in the first place. It was a ridiculous idea. But now you know he’s not going to let it go. And, ridiculously, you say it. “I was just... wondering,” you say, blood roaring. "Well, Yeonjun wants me to come over to his place this weekend, and... I’ve never...” Sucking in a quick breath, you just spit it out to get it over with, “Would you be my first kiss, Kai?”
Insects buzz outside as he looks at you, frozen in spot. You reject the urge to dart away or throw up. You’re honestly just as shaken as him. But really, who else could you trust with something like that? You don’t want Yeonjun to be disappointed if he kisses you, or to seem inexperienced to him.
And, perhaps, the hopelessly in love part of you hopes to at least feel his lips on yours at least once. If you’re going to be alone forever in your longing, you just wish that you can have this.
“What?” Kai says. He looks rattled.
Of course, he’s shocked. You shift. “Forget I said that,” you tell him, unable to meet his gaze.
String-roughened fingers wrap around your upper arm. “I didn’t say anything,” he says, voice strained and face less shock-fallen and more darkened. “But... I mean, you want me to teach you to kiss for some other guy.” He spits out the last bit as if bitter in his mouth.
“You don’t have to do it,” you say. “I just... thought that I might ask you to do it. I don’t know, I’m sorry I said it. I’ll just wing it or something.” His room’s grown ten degrees hotter, if that was possible. Especially where you feel his eyes on your face.
Almost imperceptibly, his hand tightens around you. He swallows hard. “You want to learn how to kiss?” he says. “Fine. I’ll teach you.”
In a heart-stopping moment, your eyes snap to his. Brown and familiar, they hold you with an intensity that turns your limbs into jelly. The air is stifling. “What... do I do?” you ask when the silence becomes too heavy.
A muscle feathers in his jaw, reflected in the low light of his room. It’s quick and so easy to miss, but it tells you everything you need to know about how this is making him feel. How much disbelief he’s in. “Come here,” he says, stilted around the absolute absurdity of it. He pats on his lap.
You make a hesitant crawl across the bed toward him. It seems as though your elbows might buckle beneath your weight, but you make it despite the odds. A fog settles over your brain when you rest your hands on his shoulders and bring your legs to straddle his lap.
But you shove it back; you want to live and breathe every last second of this. No matter how unbelievable or blistering it is.
Breaths fan out over your face. It’s seizing your mind like undiluted liquor. “Where do I put my hands?” you ask him. It’s breathless, the air stolen right from your lungs though your mouths haven’t even touched.
“There is fine,” he says. His words sound breathless, too. The weight of his touch on you as he runs his own up to support your back is unsure. “And then...” he says. It falls out on your mouth slowly, and then he’s taking your lips onto his.
The walls melt away, sound does too. All that is real is the taste of his lips and how they move against you. Your lips start tentative, but you try his mouth movements yourself. It feels like a timid dance—it feels like deep, deep down, finally everything is right. That mist, thick and blinding, falls back over you.
Something changes. Something in it, where you two meet, changes. He becomes hungry. Softly locked lips turn biting and nipping, shaky breaths exhaled slow through your nose. His hands on your back become surer, and one even ventures off to grab your chin. The other holds you to his chest, melded together despite the intense smoke and flame rolling off your bodies. You wonder if he can feel your heart beating a mess there.
Reluctance paints you both when you pull back. You’re panting deep drinks of air. It’s hard to think; your mind’s run off and sits just out of reach. Licking your messy lips, stained with illicitness, you can only manage to brush your fingers against it to form words. “How... was that?” you say, searching his eyes. You find his pupils blown so wide that they consume the warm brown. You’re ready to jump out of your skin with that look pointed at you.
Kai doesn’t answer, though. He slams your mouths back together as if starved by just the brief moment you’d parted for air. Nips on your bottom lip and emboldened hands—he moves like roaring water through a dam. A dam that he’d worked hard to fortify, and yet, at a crack it’s all falling down. Fingertips digging through the fabric of your shorts down to your soft hips, his chest rumbles. You feel it reflected in your core, electricity charging there and shooting up your spine and down your thighs.
You kiss him for all the times you wish you would’ve, but didn’t. The slight rolls of your hips down onto him come easy. You love how it has him making a sound into your mouth and taking the fat beneath his fingers harder into his hands. He helps you.
He drops his head into your neck. Your head swims for air and he has you shuddering with just the brushing of his nose against the column of your neck. The walls of his room spin around you. “Kai,” you whine, every bit of friction his jeans provide, even clothed as you are, just enough to rile you but not to give you what you need.
“God,” he growls, thumbs hooking under your waistband. “You always fucking run around dressed in nothing,” he says, letting his fingers linger like a suggestion of undressing you. “Did you do it on purpose? Expect to make me crazy, knowing I couldn’t touch you?”
And, in those words, it seems that he steals every last bit of breath from you. How often had you gone braless or worn something like this around him? Laid here, in his bed, like that?
Grown tired of your fruitless grinding, he brings a hand down to support your lower back and says, “Turn around.”
Though you explode with the prospect of what he might be intending to do or what’s next, if you’re really going to do this, you do so in a flash of eager limbs. His chest is solid against your back, you melt against the feeling of it. He’d become such a man lately, filled out, and you watched it happen. It was hard for your eyes not to catch on muscle-corded forearms while he picked at strings or to not appreciate the timbred rumble of his voice when you’d feel it come from his chest. How could it not do things to you? Now, he’s dragging your shorts down your legs and you’re in disbelief.
“Fuck,” he breaths out. His fingers find your panties soaked through. “So, you’re the type to get dripping wet.”
An embarrassed blush decorates your cheeks. Kai drags his index finger in circles around your clit through the fabric as if enamored with how much of a mess you’d made of it. Your hips twitch every time he rolls right over it. It’s strange how he’s got your body acting on its own volition with his touches. Even stranger that it’s your best friend doing it. “Sorry,” you tell him, wavering.
He continues those terribly slow circles. “Sorry?” he says, chin on your shoulder. He’s got you wrapped up in him, with nowhere to go but to melt back into him and let his fingers work. Free hand on one of your inner thighs digging divots into the plushness there to hold it still, he tells you, “It’s nothing to be sorry about. It’s hot as fuck. You’re so excited for me to touch you, huh?”
The words wreak havoc on you, feeding the flame that has your belly twisted up tight and the ignition point between your thighs pounding. To hear them coming from him, reserved Kai, has you digging your fingers into his forearm to prove that it’s real. You’d never have imagined him being so... filthy. You imagine him behind falsely nonchalant eyes, devouring you with a perverted mind all the times you’d spent innocently sitting together in this room.
Your cheeks squish beneath his fingers as he takes your face and turns it to him. He wants to make sure you’re look at him as he asks you, “Do you want me to finger you?”
Like a record, your brain skips. Between the blunt, lewd question and his hand on you, it’s in overload. How could he ask something like that so simply? Stunned as you are, of course you want him to. You want him to do anything to you. You nod.
Every last nerve and neuron in your system, just below the skin, cry out when his fingers slow down to nothing. “Hmm?” he says, ignoring the chasing of your hips and the opening of your thighs to invite him into paying your poor pussy the attention he’d ripped from it. He wants to hear you say it.
About ten minutes ago, you lost your mind. It does not return to you now. “I want you to,” you say, chest beating in tandem with your cunt.
“You want me to, right? Not some dumbass you met a week ago, huh?” he says. “Because you know that this is what it’s meant to be. Me, doing these things to you. Not some twenty-five-year-old piece of shit. He doesn’t deserve you, baby. Understand?”
His fingers slider under your panties. Dumb brained and cognition gone muddled, you nod. All you can really think about is the moment his fingers slide over you. Fire licks up your lower belly and your insides as he brushes calloused finger tips finally right against your clit.
Puffed breaths of a scoff raise goosebumps over your skin. “Teach you to kiss so that you can go over there and get his hands on you,” he says, middle two fingertips prodding at your entrance. “As if you were ever anybody’s but mine. You’d come crawling back to me, baby, because it was always meant to be us. He could never satisfy you.”
His words might alarm you or have you asking questions if he hadn’t pushed his fingers into you and begun curling them with strong, pointed presses, pulling soft mewls and hums from you until he finds a spot that twists up your insides. Even through the palm you press over your mouth, your moans come out more like wavering grunts and croaks. Your thighs quiver and twitch, threatening to snap closed against your own will with each. Only your feet stay planted to the mattress. Like a cone of soft serve under the sun’s blistering attention, you melt down him. Just his frame keeps you upright.
“Right there, huh?” he says. The smirk on his mouth filters his words into something taunting. “That’s where you like it.” It’s like he’s learning your body step by step, fulfilling all the questions he’d been forced to only guess at before this.
“Uh-huh.” It comes out whiny and cracks in the middle, but you can’t find even an ounce of you to care right now. If this moment had been a long spiral, a fall from grace, down into a dark pit of forgotten inhibitions, you’ve just hit the bottom. Cheeks blazing cherry blossom pink and with your fingers curling into his pant leg, you don’t doubt that you are a picturesque mess. The kind of mess that’s beautiful because it’s dirty. Your teeth are not gentle on your plush bottom lip. It stings, tugged back and bitten and still a bit swollen with kisses. Perhaps you taste the tang of metal on it, but you pay it no mind.
Kai redoubles his efforts. Now that he knows exactly how to play you, he’s fucking you on his fingers without mercy. The sounds coming from your cunt were wet, but now they’re different— nasty squelching. The only noises coupling with your pathetic keening. Forget anchoring yourself on his thigh, forget muffling your sounds. Instead, your hands fly to encircle his flexing forearm. Under your nails, angry red crescents dig into the muscle there. What had been a languid, building pleasure suddenly becomes everything. Your breaths run away from you, and you chase them frantically. Deep down in your core, the muscles spasm and rage against his fingers. “H—oh god,” you groan. Even the muscles in your thighs and tummy tighten up.
“So whiny...” Kai mumbles, voice taut with the effort of eroding you down into pure, blinding-white pleasure.
And then, in a swoop of mercy, your belly tightens. You hover here, on the precipice of something so consuming and voracious that your muscles and bones reject it, and yet your heart sings. Your eyes and cheeks and lungs and belly burn, the flame charring the edges of you in a beckon. You answer its call. Kai doesn’t mind the snapping of your legs shut around his arm, nor does your bucking or shaking deter him. He just holds you through it, arm like a metal bar around your waist. He’s everywhere, in this moment—the smell of him, leather and utterly familiar, his mouth dusting hot kisses over your skin, his fingers guiding you through orgasm. Where you’d gone silent in the initial crash of it, you devolve into mewls and grunts as you come down.
He holds you even as you slump against him boneless. Afterglow simmers in your veins and has your brain all lethargic and lazy. Neither of you speak for a while, your pulse thumping a rhythm. His breaths rise and fall against you; it grounds you in this moment where you feel all spacey and gone. You become aware again of how disgustingly sweltering it is in his room, your skin sheened.
That brainless bliss only lasts you for so long, though. When rational mind returns to you, no matter how you wish it wouldn’t, you’re hit in the chest with regret so hard it knocks the wind out of you.
How will anything ever be the same after what you’d just done? Stricken still by the thought, you barely register him pulling his fingers out of you. After all your worrying about making sure no wedge comes between you two, look what you’ve gone and done. No; nothing ever will be the same again.
⚝⭒
A couple of weeks ago, you ruined the one friendship you were supposed to have forever. It presses down heavy one you while you sit sprawled out on Yeonjun’s couch, his arm around your shoulder. His phone casts a glow over his features with all the lights out.
It doesn’t smell like home. He, pressed against your side, doesn’t smell like home.
Some stupid movie that he’d picked out, yet somehow you’ve ended up the only one still watching it, weaves a hum into the quiet of his apartment. Tangy hurt wells up in your throat. Even the moments when you and Kai would sit in mutual silence on your phones never felt like this. This is different.
You haven’t seen Kai since that night. He’s been busy getting ready to move out, and you’ve been here most days. How fast all of it had changed. You wish you’d feel whiplashed, left empty, by the drifting that you’d been so terrified of. But you don’t. It’s just been you, locked on land, watching him being taken away by the ocean’s tide with no way to change its course. You tried and screamed to call him back, but now your voice has gone hoarse.
And instead of watching him go, you choose to look elsewhere. It’s all you can do to protect yourself from the hurt.
“Hey,” Yeonjun says, finally addressing you rather than whoever’s he’s got in his phone. “Did you bring anything to change into?”
“I brought stuff to sleep in,” you say, eyeing him. You know that’s not why he’s asking. If it came down to it, you could just steal something from him and pull it on. He means going out clothes. Your jaw tightens. “But nothing nice. Why?”
He stretches his arms behind his head in a flaunt of long arms and tanned muscle. Hours spent at the gym lent him those; you appreciate the look of it with a watering mouth. Kai had earned his build by hours spent outside with your dad, because his own could care less, helping him fix up cars and vehicles of all ridiculous sorts. You remember when Kai had first gotten his truck—junk on wheels, honestly—he’d spent so much of summer out there getting it running. And, well... the sun-kissed bronze of his skin and frame that came with it, you had no qualms with.
But those memories only sit heavy in your chest as you’re sat here beside Yeonjun. You banish them elsewhere; you need to let him drift off. If you can’t have each other, and your feelings won’t permit just being friends, then you have to. You want him to do amazing things, and you fear that it’s your presence in his life that will interrupt that. As much as your feelings are real, they are selfish. You, your unsure direction and all your dead weight, should let him go. Because you love him.
“The guys want to come over,” he tells you, pushing off from the couch. “You should probably into change into something less showy.”
Less showy. Your mouth drops into a scoff of disbelief, looking down. A pair of shorts and a shirt, showy? You have to laugh, or else you’ll succumb to the strange embarrassment crawling at the back of your skull. What’s he trying to say? Is that what he thinks of you? “What’s that supposed to mean?” you say, face tilted up to him in a twist of distaste. “I’m wearing something comfy.”
He shrugs, hands shoved into the pockets of his black sweats. “Don’t want to give them the wrong idea about you, that’s all, baby. They’re guys; I just want to protect you.”
“No,” you say, the word falling out in a barked laugh. “Why would you even be bringing over dudes that you think will look at me like that? Why are you even friends with people that you think are gonna make moves on your girlfriend?” He holds a hand out to you, but your hands stay right where they are: crossed solidly over your chest.
Throwing that hand up in audacious exasperation, he gives you a look that makes you feel small and petulant—like you’re throwing an overblown fit. And, maybe you are. You should probably just do it; him seeing you as some overbearing or high maintenance girl has that embarrassment flaring like wildfire that’s found dry brush. “C’mon, baby,” he says, a lazy smile on his mouth that gets under your skin. “Let’s just have an easy night. Don’t make it a big deal.”
Let’s just have an easy night. As if you’re the one ruining the night. Something snarky tries to seize your tongue, but you hold it down. “I thought it would be just us. We wanted to watch the movie together, Yeonjun. Can’t you wait to hang out with your friends? Let’s enjoy our time together; you’ve got your shift tomorrow.”
“My fucking god,” he groans, running a hand through his hair furiously. “You’re needy, you know that? The neediest I’ve ever had to put up with. I don’t put up with needy, baby. Can’t you just chill out a little? My last didn’t mind when I’d have friends over.”
Your eyes burn. Your cheeks burn. He’d been with plenty of other girls before you; that, you’re well aware of. It’s been a corrosive source of self-doubt for you. You don’t want that title: the neediest he’s ever had. Don’t want him to think of you as some prude that won’t let him have fun. Just... hearing him bring up the other girls he’d been with before you stings and leaves welts no different from a slap in the face. Feelings of inadequacy shackle you and have you saying, “Fine. I’m gonna borrow some of your clothes.”
Heavy resentment blooms on your skin where he bends down and presses kisses to your cheek, and then mouth, and then down your neck. “Thank you, baby.”
And, where those ugly, wilted flowers of it bloom, you hear echoes of something. Something that tells you that Kai wouldn’t treat you like this. But you’ve made your bed, decided to do it yourself, and now you’ve got to lay on it.
⚝⭒
The frat parties are the worst kind of social outing that Yeonjun insists upon. The smaller kinds, more intimate gathering with just his closer friends, you tolerate much easier. You’re not fond of the circles he chooses. Breathing in thick, smoked-out air surrounded by alcohol-coated breaths is not your type of fun night. Somehow, you end up doing that more than date nights. But that’s better than being here. The base rumbles up through your feet and makes your stomach sick, and it reeks of grinding bodies and body odor, and condensation coats your fingers from the red solo cup as full as when you’d first gotten it.
But, still, you come along. Not every time, but when you don’t, you lay in his bed sickening yourself with images of what he might be doing here. How pathetic is it to attend parties with your boyfriend because you fear that otherwise, he might stick his tongue down the throats of other girls?
You’re looking for him right now, awkward and left alone. He’d promised to stick around; you had begged him to. That was pathetic, too. You know that you put up with too much. If he loved you, or honestly even liked you, you two would be in the thick of the throngs dancing or off somewhere talking with others. Together. The frantic skimming and weeding of your eyes through the blur of faces is not right. That’s not how he should make you feel. It’s not how Kai would make you feel.
Well, Kai would never have you here in the first place.
Venturing out from your little corner, you sift between the bodies of people have a hell of a lot better time than you. Drunken, some you bounce off of like bumper carts. You press your palm over the round face of your cup to spare the floor from spillage threatening to pour over the lip. It’s not like a splash from yours would matter much, though. The linoleum has already been made a fetor mess of dirt off shoes and the sticky sugar of liquor. Your shoes peel from it as you walk. God, what would your parents think of you being here?
You peek around corners and eye big groups. He’s not in the kitchen when you look there, either. Your stomach feels sick in a knowing way—a gut feeling that doesn’t justify anger or tears just yet, but you know. Right in the center of your chest, you know.
It’s in some room that you find him. Sat on the floor along with a few faces you don’t know, he pulls from his bottle. And on his shoulder, he lets a girl with shining curls and pink cheeks rest her head. At your busting in on the intimate gathering, Yeonjun’s eyes slide to you. Recognition flashes over them and wars with bleary drunkenness.
“Hey, baby,” he says. Their gazes all fall on you, but you can hardly see them through blurry eyes.
The girl lifts her head from his shoulder. She’d caught the memo.
“I think I’m gonna go.” You make it sound resigned, try to not let them see your shame, but your voice betrays you and crackles. Maybe it’s better to pretend it doesn’t feel like you’ve just been kicked in the stomach and left to reel against the force, but you can’t. You’re nowhere near shocked, nowhere near blindsided, but still you hurt.
He follows you down the hall. “What’s your problem?” he says, the few, plain words mending and waving into a slurring.
You’ve got one goal: get to the front door, away from the shitty music and him. His words, sharpened, fall off your skin despite his efforts. What good would fighting do you, anyway? It was always going to end up this way. This is just who he is, and he doesn’t give two shits enough about you to want to change that.
“Baby, seriously? That made you this mad? I didn’t even fucking do anything. Stop being insecure,” he says. At the gritting of your teeth, he sees an opportunity and pounces on it. “You don’t need to be jealous. I don’t do jealous shit. We can dance, or something. Shit, I don’t know what you want! Just stop throwing a fit.”
Didn’t do anything? You have to laugh. Maybe you didn’t walk in on him fucking someone else, but that’s not what this is about. Not even a little bit. You’ve checked out, and the fact that he thinks he can make you believe that it’s your fault this time only drives the killing stake in harder.
Maybe you’re bitter. It claws at your insides—turns your face hot and screams in your face that you’ve been used. But beside it sits a sadness. Not the slow kind, but the quick sadness of hurt. Why hadn’t you been good enough for him to love you? To like you? You’d left behind Kai and rested your new life on Yeonjun’s shoulders. You’d wanted so badly for his approval, or for him to want you. You did your best to try and make this work out because you needed it to. You needed so desperately proof that you could fall in love with somebody else. But your best was not what Yeonjun was interested in.
Pins and needles prick your skin as you step outside, like jumping into an ice bath. It shocks you out of dizziness. Words surge up and out in a flash flood like hard reality. You spin on him. “Jealous?” you say, choking out a scathing laugh. “The last thing I’d ever let myself suffer over you is jealousy. Get over yourself. I’m going, stay here if you want. I don’t care.”
“How are you gonna do that, huh?” he says. The flickering yellow of the porchlight paints his features. The shadow of something fluttering around it cuts dark spots in the light, and then a small little moth comes down and jumps around in his face. He waves it off. “Gonna have bitch boy come pick you up? You can’t leech off him forever; he’s gonna get sick of picking up another man’s girlfriend.” It seems like you walking in on that had sobered him up, but his breath still curls out onto your face with the reek of alcohol. “It’s not a big deal. You’re making this a bigger deal than it has to be. Do you not trust me?”
“You are such a piece of shit,” you grit out. “I don’t know what I was thinking. Ever. I don’t know how I let this go on for so long.” You don’t like him having Kai in his mouth, don’t like him trying to act like you’re conflating things, and especially don’t like that face he’s making. As if you’re acting crazy and overblown. “No, I don’t trust you. You didn’t fuck her, but come on, Yeonjun. Seriously? You think I’m stupid, and I’m sick of it. You thought this would be easy because I didn’t have the experience you have, but I’m sorry. I don’t like being walked over.”
“If you’re gonna be so goddamn jealous, then maybe we aren’t gonna work,” he says.
That moth, floating light in the air, is right back in his face. Yeonjun takes two hands and smashes it between a clap of his hands. He shakes its flattened, broken body off his hand. Looking down at it laying there on top of dirt-caked concrete, you get this... feeling. A tickling around your person.
“See if I care,” you snap, throat aching against the onslaught of emotion and held back tears.
⚝⭒
Rivulets of raindrops dilute the tears on your cheeks. Your hair plasters to your face and your clothes to your body.
For a week, you’d went about it all as if it hadn’t happened. And then you came here.
It’d not been this rainy when you first got down to the creek—just a gentle trickle, really. You hadn’t been crying then, either. But, watching the water work at babbling over stone, you let yourself feel it. Here, where you’d had so many good memories. You’ve gone and tainted it, now. But for whatever reason, you’d just wanted to be here. Arms curled around yourself and fingers digging into drenched sleeves, you don’t wipe away the tears or cover the sounds of your crying. You let the stream hear it; it’ll sweep it right up and down the way. Somewhere far off, where you don’t have to feel it anymore.
You realize that, usually, you’d be over at Kai’s right now. The fact that his room was not the first place you thought you could go to anymore is a punch to the gut. You drop your face into your hands and cry harder. Really, you’ve got to stop doing that to yourself. Thinking of sad things—putting your hurt under the microscope to see it closer. It’d be easier to just fold it up and tell yourself that it’ll pass, and that relationships end all the time.
It’s not him that you cry over. Well, maybe some of it is. Rather, it’s that you have absolutely no idea where you’re going. Where you are. Finally, you’d built yourself a raft to get off the shore and go out to sea, because that’s what you’re supposed to do, and it’s breaking apart right beneath you. And, stranded and alone in the water, you’ve got no way to get back to shore to build yourself another raft. You’re stranded, and the scariest bit is that you’re doing it all alone. You weren’t supposed to do this alone. You two made promises back then.
You suppose that a promise is one of those things you were supposed to leave faith in back on shore.
The raindrops are heavy over you. The fall of it roars against the ground, a torrent downpour. It’s not coupled with whipping wind or flashes of lightning—just straight, still falling. It’s a somber feeling no different from the gnawing in your chest.
Like chimes, there’s a distant, gentle sound. Maybe water falling over creek rock, but it’s more like suggestion. A sweet sound that you shouldn’t even be able to hear over the rest of it, it’s as if it’s right in your ear. A whisper.
You fix your blurry eyes with a wet sleeve. Rain falls right back into its place, but you see it: a silvery, whimsy haze. And the moths. They jump and call you, this time. Their glow bounces off the rainy mist against the grey of night’s arrival. Then, all you can hear is the whispering. Where you stand frozen, your feet beg to move. To follow them.
So you do.
Their entourage of moondust trails them where they go, wrapping you up and weaving between raindrop and space. You don’t worry where they’ll take you, or even try to wrap your head around this happening again. You just follow, mind glossed over and entranced with how beautiful it is. When you’d seen them before, it’d made you uneasy. Mostly because it looked so unearthly and unbelievable. But this time you just follow.
A far-off voice, one oh-so-familiar, peaks through the haze. It’s not enough to stop you, but then you hear it again, louder and closer.
You blink a few times. Once to break away the fog, and then twice to focus your eyes on Kai stood in front of you. His hair lays in wet spikes over his eyes and beads of rain trace the planes of his face. He’s as soaked as you.
“Kai?” you say. Looking around you, you’ve ended up somewhere in the field between your houses and the creek. But you’ve got no recollection of walking here. Whatever that mist is, sentient or not, had swept you here.
His voice is strained, but you appreciate hearing it. “Break up with him,” he tells you.
In his eyes, as you search them, there’s stardust glowing like reflection. Your face twists up. “What?” you say, breath a puff of smoke ahead of you. Summer had come and gotten away from you so fast, and now it’s gone all cold again.
“Break up with him,” he echos, face solemn. He looks ruffled.
“Why?” you ask, “And why are you out here?”
“Because I’m moving out today, and I think I deserve to at least see you before I go.” His eyes look over you. “And... your dad said you went down to the creek.”
He’s moving out today, and you had no idea. And really, it’s your fault. You’d driven that wedge between the two of you. “I did break up with him.”
Downpour fills his quiet for a few moments, his face swirling with emotion like the clouds above you. He nods. “Good.”
There are a few more long minutes between you; just you two searching each other's faces, antsy to say so much that it bunches up in your chests and stalls. It’s what a summer of longing does to you. Even with Yeonjun, even trying to slowly chip away the stitching that had connected the two of you at the hip, you were helpless to stop the gnawing of the love you bear for him. Even just seeing him now, you feel those threads mending back up. God, why does it have to be so hard?
He just looks at you. For a few beats, he just looks at you. There are so many questions in his eyes. They flit across and turn over, but all he settles on is, “Why?”
There’s so much you want to tell him. Words pile up to the top, some threatening to spill over. But you know that if you tell him some of it, just to make up for all the time you’d missed out on together, it’ll all come crashing out. And you don’t think you want him to know just how much you accepted, the way you let yourself get treated. So, you shake your head and say, “It doesn’t matter.”
Kai looks like he wants to push that issue, but whatever look he finds on your face deters him. “Come with me,” he pleads. “I want you to come with me.”
Your throat tightens. Curling your arms around yourself harder, the rain only coming down on you harder, you say, “Kai, I want to. I want to. I just... I don’t want to freeload off you, because you’re doing great things, and I’m just...” Your tongue darts out to wet your lips, but they’re already as soaked as the rest of you. “I’m just going nowhere. And I don’t want to be a burden, or ever be the reason that you can’t do what you dream of. If staying here means that you become everything that you’re destined to do, then I’m happy with that, Kai. I am.”
He shakes his head, stumbling toward you. “No, no you don’t get it,” he says, frantically taking your shoulders into big hands. Under his touch, every taut muscle goes slack. You melt. “You don’t get it. You are the music. Every single song is about you. Every single fucking song is about you. I want you to come with me, please. I love you, I have always loved you, and I will always love you, and I thought you’d loved me too, and I don’t want to do this alone. I can’t do it alone.”
He loves you. Kai loves you. The enormity of it rumbles the ground where you stand on legs you fear might just give in. You flex your fingers to combat the tears pricking your eyes. It doesn’t work; they brim and well up, spilling down over your cheeks. “What?” you say, voice softly breaking. “Kai, I didn’t...”
“And just when I thought I finally had you, you left me,” he says, throwing a hand up beside him in a big gesture. “You left me! I woke up thinking you’d be there, and that maybe you loved me too, and you had left me. And then you threw me away for some piece of shit, and you stopped coming around.” His chest heaves for breaths.
Your face contorts. That night, the one where you two had slipped up, you’d fallen asleep curled up against his chest on undiluted contentment. When you woke up, you had panicked. You thought he’d wake up and pretend it hadn’t happened, or he’d be uncomfortable, or even be disgusted and regretting. You couldn’t handle that, so you slipped out before he woke up. It’d been an attempt to protect your tender heart, but looking at the twitching of his lip now, you begin to think it’s the most selfish thing you’ve ever done. He thinks you used him and left him. Your stomach twists. Voice thick, you say, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I left you, Kai. I thought you didn’t... I thought you didn’t see me that way. I was scared. I’m sorry I hurt you.”
Brows knitted together, he says, “Thought I didn’t love you?” His hand cups your cheek, warm against the soft frozen skin he finds there. “I’ve... I’ve dreamed of you almost every night of my life. In my sleep, I see you, and you’re happy and glowing, and that damn... mist is all around you. I couldn’t get away from you even in my sleep.”
Darting between his eyes, soft and reflecting your face back to you, it’s hard to breathe. Kai’s dreamt of you; he’s as sickly in love with you as you are him. Thunder claps, and the ground shakes, and the heavens open up above you, the trumpets belt, and you two are in love. Somewhere deep in your center, you feel it—your soul nodding yes.
The mist. You know exactly what he’s talking about. “I saw it. That stuff, those moths. The stuff we saw back then.”
“I did too,” he says, wet spikes of hair bouncing with a nod. “Not that long ago. It was the first time I saw it out of a dream since that day.”
Back then, you two had only budding, innocent love for each other. Things hadn’t become mangled and lost to confused hearts or expectations. When they’d appeared to you, you hadn’t needed it. This time, you’d followed it. And it had led you here—somehow had led you right to the very spot you needed to so that every last piece might fall into place. For this moment to happen. You know why it did.
“I’ll go with you, Kai. I’ll go wherever you go; I love you. I’ve loved you since forever,” you say, each and every word massive and lovely on your tongue. “I’m sorry I didn’t say it earlier.”
So unlike the last times your mouth had met, he brings his mouth to yours with a dazzling clarity. No longer is it confused kisses; he locks his lips against yours with the urgency of so many years being unable to. Kai’s hands cradle your wet cheeks, hold you so tenderly into his kiss. His touch grounds you, makes the moment real. You melt into him—your fingers curled into his shirt as if holding him there so that he won’t disappear like something of an incorporeal dream. He sighs through his nose, kissing you harder. Even if it all were fake and this was nothing more than a feverish figment of your imagination, you think you could die happy just knowing this once.
But it is utterly real, and utterly yours. You kiss him harder, too.
When your lungs start to burn and plead for breath, you two pull away from each other. Your eyes flutter open to capture his. Warm and brown and the same ones you’ve stared into so many times before, but not like this, you sink into them. He runs his thumb over your cheek as he sinks into yours. His tongue darts out to lick lips painted with you. In the inches between you, space no longer feels heavy or charged with grievances. Every last unsaid thing had been answered.
“I have my stuff up in the truck,” he says, breaths soft. Brown eyes dart around your face. “I’ll help you add your stuff to it.”
You shudder out a breath. Add your stuff to it. A nervous energy settles down over you, but it doesn’t seem so bad if you’re doing it with him. Together.
“Okay,” you whisper, a balmy secret just like the ones you used to share in small, giggly voices so many years ago. “Okay.”
⚝⭒
Shivers seize you like jittering bones, all wrapped up in a blanket. The velour cushion seats beneath you have soaked up water and become damp, but Kai’s got the heater blasting. You wind around back roads, headlights illuminating the way ahead of you. Stray droplets whip in them, but nothing much. Isn’t it funny how the rain had just stopped like that? That’s just how the weather is, out here. You wonder how the weather might act wherever you’re headed.
Your teeth chatter as if your jaw had its own will. The two of you had the windows down thinking that the wind might dry you off, but all it’s done is lap at your bitten cheeks. You reach down for the handle to crank it up. You’ve got a long drive ahead of you—either you’ll eventually dry off, or you can pull off at a rest area to change in a bathroom. The wet clothes are really not helping.
With an arm up on the steering wheel, Kai turns his attention on you. You know that smile. “Cold?” he asks, eyes darting between your face and the road. With the hand he’s not got working the steering wheel, he runs fingers over your thigh. Soft, gentle massages, yes. The number it does on your core is absurd. Each mindless digging into your thighs and brush of his thumb, sparks sputter there. You’ve sat here, right in his passenger seat, so many times before. Day trips up to the lake, the one he’d joined your family camping at for so many summers, all the times he’d driven you to school in this truck, and even just a quick run down to a convenience store for a late-night snack. You’d deemed it your seat. But never once had you sat in it like this. Your heart does a flip. All those times you’d wish he’d reach over and do just this—a small gesture that would’ve been so big then. And it’s your reality, now.
“Freezing,” you say. A brush of his fingers nearer the apex of your thighs sends you pressing them together and shifting in your seat. “But not everybody runs as hot as you, though, so.”
His eyes catch the movement in just the split second he looked over to you. “Huh,” he says. He turns to look at you, his gaze flickering with something anew. Something that you’d only ever seen once before. “Is that it?”
It’s hard to swallow. His fingers brush higher, and higher, feather-dustings of calloused fingertips that sends tingles shooting up your spine at the slightest suggestion of where he’s headed. “Yes,” you say, feigning indignance to cover the shiver that threatens to overtake you. When his fingertips dance at the waistband of your bottoms, it does so anyway. “Kai,” you say, blood hot in your veins. “You’re...driving.”
His eyebrows pinch into a taunting furrow. “I am,” he says, nodding. “Don’t worry about it, baby. I’ve got us.”
And he does; fingers slipping under the band of both your bottoms and your panties, he doesn’t even tear his eyes off the road. He’d driven these roads so much, you think he might be able to do it asleep. Even drawing a mewl from you with a brush over your clit, he doesn’t look away more than a quick glimpse at your pinkened cheeks.
Two fingers dragging up your folds, right over the source of the mess. “You get excited so easily, huh?” he hums. “You like it when I play with you.”
When he presses those fingers at your entrance, you can’t help but be taken back to that night. It echoes and reverberates through you. Long fingers, strong and punctual brushes against the sweet spot—he was criminally good with his fingers. Playing guitar did more for him than just music. He seemed to know exactly how to utilize those roughened fingers and trained flicks. Your muscles flicker as he abandons your hole for more brushes at your bud.
Those teasing, sly touches turn to something more serious. His fingers roll over your clit, slow but enough to have you sighing and rolling your hips against the seat belt. But last time had gone just like this, him touching you and receiving nothing. He should feel good, too. “Shouldn’t you pull over?” you sigh, muscles taut. Your breaths come out shuddering and half-controlled, interrupted by the tightness that each delicious swirl provokes. The door takes the brunt of your grip, white-knuckling the interior.
He laughs, a husky sound that is tinder to fire. He knows what you mean. “Maybe,” he says. “But I think I’m enjoying this plenty. I think I want to see you cum on my fingers again.”
Fingers pinching and flicking faster, you grow breathy and whiny, hips rolling against the seatbelt and back into the seat. Your muscles, all the way down your thighs and deep in your belly, jump and twitch each time his fingers run over your clit in just the right spot—that tender spot that’s so good that it teeters on overwhelming. The kind that makes you hiss and then want more. “Shit, Kai,” you whine. “Right—there, keep going."
He doesn’t answer with any teasing words. No, he just doubles down right at that angle and pressure, leaned back into his seat and driving as if he wasn’t fingers-deep in your panties right now. His sculpted profile at total ease—it does something for you. A delicious tightness curls its fingers over your center, promising a sugary ecstasy that you can’t help but chase. Bucking into his hands as best you can, you go quiet. Right there—right there, you feel it. The cusp. Your fingers brush over it, clenching around nothing and squeezing your thighs tight around him. Every last drop of blood in your body reaches for it, singing and dancing through your veins and making you dizzy.
And then he stops. Your mouth drops open, whiplashed and helpless to its slipping away from you. You whittle your gaze into something sharp and turn to him. “What—why?” you complain. The tide slips further and further and further back, but you still taste sea salt on your tongue. Frustration sets in its place as you feel it go. Seriously, you’d been right there. “You’re so mean.”
He slows and then with the clicking of the turn signal, he’s off the road and pulling the truck into park on a little secluded side road. Where the headlights pierce the pitch black, nothing but gravel and field surrounds you. He doesn’t kill the engine, instead pulling his hand free from you.
Your heart, still stuttering with your lost orgasm, kicks back to life as he smears your slick over your mouth, dragging it over your lips and then taking his thumb to run it right over the plush of your mouth. “Am I?” he says, fingers taking your chin to meet your eyes with his. Endless hunger, pupils so blown that his eyes look black, pins you. “I don’t think you’ve seen mean yet, baby.”
Darting your tongue out to clean your lips, you look at him through your eyelashes. “Show it to me, then.”
Something dark passes over his face. It has your skeleton jumping out of your body. Then, he says, “Is that what you want? You want mean?”
Brain gone to mush that can only really think about him touching you, a slow nod is all you can manage.
The engine’s hum prevails for some long, thick seconds. And then, he tilts his head in a gesture. “Get in the back.”
Holy shit. You want to sit there frozen in an overwhelming sort of excitement, but his seatbelt clicks undone and you’re set into motion. In a flurry of giggles and clumsy limbs, you climb up over the center console and into the backseat. He slips out of the front seat, not bothering to even kill the engine.
The door beside you opens in a swirl of cold wind. In nothing more than a blink, a strong hand has both your wrists pinned to the cushions and your back flush against it. Nose-to-nose, his breath hot over your face. “I’ve got plenty of ideas as to how I can warm you up.”
You appreciate each other’s faces for a beat more, you looking up at him big-eyed and waiting. Kai breaks the moment to attack your neck in a procession of bites and kisses. Your mouth falls into a silent sound.
“You know,” he says, free hand working your pants off. His eyes are trained on you, though. “I thought about doing this to you all summer. Touching you again.” He moves on to your top, pushing the fabric up until your chest is freed, clad in soft cotton. He eats the sight up. You want to reach down and cup the back of his head or feel his hair between your fingers as he presses his mouth against the soft beginning of your cleavage, but he’s got your wrists firmly planted. So much so, that you wonder exactly how he’s got you so secure with just one hand. Kai is strong, but maybe you hadn’t seen just how strong. Your skin aches under the purple bites he decorates you in. The sight of him—face in your chest and marking you up so lazily—has your teeth abusing your bottom lip. Whatever sounds you might make otherwise would be embarrassing. Kai lifts his eyes to you. “And I think you thought of me, too. Didn’t you?”
“Oh, god, yes,” you say, writhing beneath him. He’s going so slow. You want him all over you. “So much.”
He likes that. He takes your pebbled nipple into his mouth through the fabric. Soft grazes of teeth and sucks, you’re burning all over. When he pulls back, he’s left you dark wet patches when the bra had only just dried against your body heat. “Good,” he rasps, taking his big hands demanding and hungry over your torso. They swallow your frame up, soothing skin but lighting it aflame all the same. “Good girl.”
You never thought just words could unravel you, but those did the job. Not a gasp, nor a sucking in of breath—no, you go silent and brainless, fumbling for rational thought.
The dropping of your jaw has Kai delighted. “You’re so pretty,” he says. In a swift and powerful hoist, he’s tugging you down the cushions toward him with greedy fingers. He’s got your thighs pressed up to your chest. You’re bent right in half.
Out of breath, you huff out, “You too.”
A quick laugh falls from his mouth, lips pulled into a smug tilt. He nips at your calf up by his face. “So sweet, it almost makes me feel bad for what I’m about to do to you.” Reaching down for your panties, he pulls back on the suffocating press for only enough time to drag them up your legs. Those get discarded somewhere on the floor. Who cares about that right now, though? All you can register is the metallic clinking of his belt being undone. It’s got your nervous system twisting up.
And, those words. Electricity shoots bolts of pure, sizzling revery into your core. What I’m about to do to you. You imagine a great deal of things that he might mean, but still, you think that none could hold a candle against the promise his voice held in saying it.
Kai presses his body to your thighs and hooks your calves over his shoulders, and it all becomes real. The press of his heavy cock to your folds, the digging of his fingers into your outer thighs, his pretty eyes sparkling with something feral. As real as it gets—more real than anything you’ve ever felt in the entirety of your life. Your hands find perch flattened to his broad chest.
The position leaving you two no option but to look right into each other, he holds your gaze and begins slow drags of his hot length up and down your slit. Tantalizing, awful, awful drags. When his tip nudges your eager clit, you jolt. And then he does it again. And again.
“Kai,” you mewl. A press against your hole has you hopeful, and he lingers there for a moment, but doesn’t give it to you. Can’t he just fuck you? You’ve never been more pitifully in need of something in your life.
“Shh.” His ruts get more daring, smearing your slick up onto your belly. “Take it.”
You wiggle your toes in the air and make passes at arching yourself into him in search of better friction. He’s got you pressed so suffocatingly into the seat that it does absolutely nothing for you. In fact, he holds your harder and changes tack so that your thighs press together. At the very apex of them, his weeping cock slips through the seam.
Pressing his cheek into your calf, he watches you. Every gasp and shaky inhale, he watches. It spurs his rutting on, sticky sounds and pants eating up the air. Your nails claw at his hands as, finally, a knot tightens in your core.
“Yes, please,” you breathe. He fucks your thighs harder. Faster. Every nudge at your clit and hole becomes euphoric. “Kai, baby—I’m gonna—”
Just as furiously easy as last time, he rips it all away from you. The rushing away of the buzzing and promise of shaking thighs—he takes it from you again. It brings prickling tears to your eyes. “Kai?” you hiss. “Again?”
His eyes aren’t playful. He pulls your calves back over his shoulders, handling your hips into a better position to press his cock right at your entrance as if you weigh nothing. Face utterly straight, he says, “I don’t think you deserve it, do you? Not after what you did with Yeonjun.”
A swallow goes down your throat hard. He presses himself just a bit harder into you. Not in yet, but right there.
When he does begin sliding in, the stretch of it... You cling to him and squirm between him and the warm cushions behind you. Each inch is a heady feeling, all the way up to the hilt of him. He shudders a controlled breath. “You’re so fucking tight, though,” he grits out. “Did he not fuck you right?”
Slaps of skin bounce off the car interior and between your bodies. He starts off at a brutal pace; you know it’s meant to make your brain go foggy. Squeezing your eyes closed, you manage, “I... didn’t fuck him.” It comes out strangled, voice bouncing as he fucks you into the car seat.
Thumb tugging your bottom lip down and then dipping into your mouth, he watches the show of your ecstasy down to every last detail. “Yeah?” he says, voice shaking and almost desperate. “Always thinking of me, huh? Such a good little princess. You know exactly where your heart belongs.”
You want to answer him, even just with a whine or moan. You try to. But with his thumb pressing down on your tongue, enough to pin it to the floor of your mouth, it’s not gonna happen. He tastes salty in your mouth.
His truck consists of his grunts and whines, and your taut groans for some moments that seem to stretch forever. The planes of his groin grind against your clit when he delivers occasional pointed rolls, but mostly it’s just an animalistic, feverish dancing of your two sweaty bodies, holds growing more frantic the closer you get.
Thumb wet with saliva; he frees your mouth. The hand trails slowly down your face and your chin, brushing feather touches, until he finds your neck.
Your eyes fly open, wide. He pressed his fingers into your neck—no real pressure yet, he looks at you through damp strands of dangling hair and says, “Want my fingers around your neck?” His thumb brushes over the buzzing pulse point there.
“Yes,” you grit out, body bouncing and back raw with friction against the coarse cushion’s surface. Your breath stutters, your mind stutters. Even your blinks stutter, eyelids too lazy to keep up. “Please.”
The pressure of his fingers there—it frightens you and has you tightening around him at the same time. But you would trust nobody more with your life than Kai.
He presses his cheek to your calf to indulge in the sight of you like this: underneath him, folded in two, nowhere to go but to take his pistoning hips, cheeks blazing, and his fingers pressed into your windpipe. If the way he becomes sloppier and more desperate in his tempo has anything to say for it, it does something for him.
“Gonna be my pretty little girlfriend, huh?” he says. His voice is tight—so is your belly. You’re both so close. Hopefully, this time he’ll let you cum. “Take you to every show; show you off to everybody. Fuck.”
Brain like static and swimming with a pinched flow of oxygen, you slur your words. “You’re—hah—gonna have other girls all over you.”
The taunting, split-second raise of his brows flips your belly. You tighten around him again. If he keeps hitting that spot, tip ramming into the soft spot deep inside you that he’d taken such delicate care of finding last time, you’re going to burst into sparkling flame and firework. He growls, “Well, I’ll just have to knock you up so that they know I’m yours, huh?”
Holy shit. You like the sound of that. Your nails dig into his wrist around your neck, but you cry out a pitchy, “Yes!”
“Oh, you like that?” Kai releases your throat to take both your hips. You gulp for air, finding nothing but the thick air of sex and humid breaths, at the opportunity. He’s ramming into you like he’s found a purpose. “Isn’t this the perfect position to do it? Get you pregnant?”
With every last bit of brain power you’ve got, teetering on the edge excruciatingly close to salvation, you groan a long, hoarse sound. “Fuck, yes! Please, Kai, inside—” A hot trail of tears roll down your temples.
It’s all he’s got to hear to still inside you. His growl rumbles deep in his chest, holding you in place and filling you with his hot cum deep in your cunt. That feeling, coupled with his short grinds against your clit as he fucks his seed deeper, takes your soul by sinful claws and crumbles it down into nothing. You burst into a shaking, whimpering peak, sucking your lips into your mouth to bare through the sheer twisting of your insides and the flame that consumes up your thighs and cunt.
He falls on you heavy, face in your neck. Warm kisses against your clammy skin meld with your slow floating down, the two of you a beautiful, nasty picture of fucked out. He stays right inside you—the absolute stillness of him, you think he has no plans of pulling out any time soon. His long fingers card through your sweaty locks of hair.
Finally, he presses himself off you. You get a glimpse of the window behind him—fogged up and filthy with your affairs. Anybody to see the truck from the outside would know exactly what went on inside, but right now, you don’t care. Not one bit. Your panted breaths drag in nothing but musk and thick, hot air. The drumbeat in your chest tells you that, despite how you feel ripped straight from your body, you are very much still alive. More alive than ever.
“Warm?” he says, pushing sticky hair off his forehead. He’s a mess, too. His hair is ruffled with your touch, his clothes rumpled the same, beads of sweat rolling down the planes of his cheeks and neck, and his eyes a lazy smolder. As much as he looks like sex personified, a soft smile twitches at his lips.
You snort. You can’t help but feel giddy, here with him. You’re with him. Nothing has ever felt more right. Unplugged when he pulls out of you, your mess trickles down onto the seat below you. “Yeah,” you say. “Very.”
Warm is not enough to begin to describe how you feel. In your ears, you hear whisperings. Soft and gentle. Perhaps it was divine intervention, or the fates lending you their word, or maybe just rational thought. It says:
Home. You are home.
✎୭ ashlynn's note how do we feel about this pair? i really didn't mean for this to get so long, but i ended up RLLY liking their chemistry. i had to do their story justice. also, i finished this with kai as a guitarist and then his drummer performance came out... hmm.
﹙🏷️ ﹚@lvrs-street2mmorrow , @soohashits , @f4iryfever , @arcturus444 , @linqed , @serenityism00 , @immelissaaa , @luv4cheol , @lickingan0rchid , @20-cms , @hhoneylix , @beestvng , @hyucktapes , @bewitchless , @prince-jjae , @blankliving , @yaoizee , @stormy1408 , @missychief1404 , if your tag isn't working, check the mentions part of your settings!
#txt#txt fanfic#txt x reader#fem reader txt#hueningkai fic#hueningkai fanfic#hueningkai#kai#kai fanfic#kai smut#hueningkai smut#hyuka smut#hyuka x reader#txt hyuka#hyuka hard hours#hyuka#hueningkai angst#best friend hueningkai#txt smut#txt ff#txt fanfiction#txt fic#emo kai#emo hyuka#emo hueningkai#hyuka ff#hyuka fanfiction#hyuka fanfic#hyuka angst
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—ㅤ⠀ 峠ㅤ⠀ 𝗐͟𝗐͟𝗐﹕﹙ZB1 FIC RECS﹚
all fics of zb1 that me and @fairyofmangoes read and swooned over at the dead of the night. the authors are really talented too so make sure to check out their other works too.
▨ LEGEND ㄑ f - fluff, a - angst, s - smut
성한빈 ─── SUNG HANBIN
be careful, don't fall by @haesunflower [f] [uni AU, clumsy reader and student nurse hanbin; 0.7k]
a night in monaco [ one . two ] by @ohsunnyboy [f] [fake dating, flirting, one bed trope, lazy kisses]
to breathe in your life by @zhng96 [f] [comfort fic, insecure!reader]
sitting in traffic by @loserlvrss [a,f]
hanbin and non-sexual dominance by @zbis [f]
forget? you? by @hariboz [a]
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김지웅 ─── KIM JIWOONG
french press by @zerobaselove [s] [jealous jiwoong; 1.2k]
cuteness aggression by @haecien [f] [boyfriend texts with jiwong]
a morning to remember by @taerrrrrae [f]
winter confessions by @taerrrrrae [f]
.
章昊 ─── ZHANG HAO
a perfect fit by @zerobaselove [f] [campus crush! zhang hao x reader; 3.4k]
to chase a dream by @ohsunnyboy [f] [musician au, rivals, makeouts and happy endings]
one day only by @cinnajun [f] [established relationship; 1.3k]
drunk of you by @kkongdakz [a] [rivals to somewhat lovers, suggestive; 2.3k]
dollification by @amoremainslayer [s]
sir oblivious by @sxmmerberries [f] [textfic]
.
석매튜 ─── SEOK MATTHEW
coloumb's law by @seoktized [s] [ft. jake from enhypen, college au; 3.4k]
airpods by @iwillneverforgiveyousunghanbin [s] [stepcest; 2k]
feel good by @loserlvrss [s] [soft smut]
show me how to use that pretty mouth of yours by @aswaki [s] [oral fixation; 2.2k]
mile high club privilege by @aswaki [s] [stewardess/flight attendant reader, strangers themed; 1.8k]
matthew flashfic this and this by @aswaki [s]
semi public sex by @528-hotline [s]
.
김태래 ─── KIM TAERAE
taedros taedros [ one . two . three ] by @iwillneverforgiveyousunghanbin [s] [bsf taerae]
giving it a chance by @haesunflower [a] [not super angsty, established long term relationship]
keep it quiet by @cinnajun [f, sugg] [best friend’s brother!au x reader; 3.6k]
this loser by @kkongdakz [f]
a summ(lov)er song by @kkongdakz [f]
.
沈泉锐 ─── SHEN QUANRUI
against everything by @ohsunnyboy [f] [royalty!au, arranged marriages, sword fights and honour]
cherry chapstick by @loserlvrss [sugg]
sunlight by @kkongdakz [f]
wooden block tower by @kkongdakz [a]
.
김규빈 ─── KIM GYUVIN
7:34 pm by @zhng96 [f] [blurb]
sunny days by @zhng96 [f] [3.1k]
new year's kiss by @hariboz [f] [friends to lovers; 1.6k]
only one by @loserlvrss [f] [established relationship; 1k]
battery recharge by @kkongdakz [f]
kiss it better by @kkongdakz [f]
world's cutest couple by @cinnajun [fake angst]
pool sex by @carmesi-butterfly [s]
birthday much? by @arafilez [f] [drabble; 0.3k]
you kissed him and ran away by @sxmmerberries [f] [text imagine, bsf!gyuvin]
.
박건욱 ─── PARK GUNWOOK
why are you ignoring me by @slytherinshua [f]
one bed by @kkongdakz [f] [enemies to somewhat lovers; 1k]
consequences by @lovepookie [f, a]
.
한유진 ─── HAN YUJIN
a spark of light by @ohsunnyboy [f] [bestfriends, homework, pining away and gaming]
love lock by @trsrina [f]
mario cart by @trsrina [f]
2a.m. crisis by @slytherinshua [f, sickfic]
side dishes by @gyubaseone [f]
everything is okay by @taeraemisu [f]
7:39 pm by @itsactuallylina [f]
red thread of fate by @carmesi-butterfly [f]
.
제로베이스원 ─── OT9 / POLY
zb1 top 3 kinks by @melobin [s] [not including gunwook & yujin]
cute things zb1 do as you bf by @tzuberry [f] [maknae line hcs]
she's busy bro by @haesunflower [f] [text imagines, yujin not included]
cuddling with zb1 by @cinnajun [f] [headcannons, yujin not inc]
this love is small by @taeiun [f] [some of the little things that they do in your relationship, yujin not inc]
zb1 as love tropes by @tzuberry [f] [headcannons, maknae line]
sweet venom by @taeiun [f] [headcannons, pulling them by the collar and kissing, 02z + 04z + gw]
zb1 as your boyfriends by @cinnajun [f] [hcs, yujin not incl]
zb1 as taylor swift songs by @zhng96 [f] [blurbs]
calling your bsf "babe" by @zhng96 [f] [text imagines]
why him by @hariboz [f] [text imagines, you ask for another member's pc]
why didn't you kiss me by @hariboz [f] [text imagines]
favourite places to kiss by @loserlvrss [f] [blurb, gw + yj not incl]
is this mine? by @kkongdakz [f] [reaction, when you wear their clothes]
we're so cliché by @kkongdakz [f] [zb1 as love tropes]
kiss me by @kkongdakz [sugg] [making out with hyung line]
you being sleep deprived/sleep drunk by @sxmmerberries [f] [maknae line + taerae, text imagines]
no more kisses by @faithst [f] [ot8, hcs, s/o being shy after every kiss]
copyright to respective authors, don't forget to reblog their works ^^ okshu + @fairyofmangoes
#﹏ ara's zb1 fic rec 𐚁̷#꩜ latte ✿#zerobaseone#zerobaseone x reader#zerobaseone fics#zerobaseone fluff#zerobaseone smut#zb1 x reader#zb1#hanbin x reader#jiwoong x reader#zhang hao x reader#matthew x reader#taerae x reader#ricky x reader#gyuvin x reader#gunwook x reader#yujin x reader#kim taerae#kim gyuvin#kim jiwoong#zhang hao#sung hanbin#seok matthew#shen ricky#park gunwook#han yujin
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⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ cherry flavored
pair: bsf!jungwon x gn!reader | genre: fluff | warning(s): mention of bleeding &cuts, boxing | wc: 400 | synopsis: you and your best friend have a small chat before his next fight.
lynne’s notez🗒️: ik im so inactive but dropping this here bcz i love blonde jungwon😁😁
your best friend’s hobby of hitting other people for fun always worried you. standing from the sidelines, you watch as the guy pommels jungwon with relentless force, forcing him into a corner of the ring.
you want to say something, anything to encourage to him to stand up. but all that comes out is, “don’t be lame, jungwon!” you watch as a smirk spreads across his lips and he’s quick to stand back up. using his last bit of strength, he quickly turns the match around by using a technique you haven’t seen him use before just as the bell rings.
as he steps out of the ring he finds you in the back waiting to congratulate him on the win. you hand him a half-full water bottle and he wordlessly thanks you. “that guy was rocking your shit,” you say with a giggle.
jungwon rolls his eyes, unclasping the cap on the bottle and taking a sip, “you like seeing me in pain a bit too much.”
“maybe i do,” you shrug, stepping closer to him. jungwon was always taller than you but a sudden growth spurt in middle school had stretched that by a mile. he also leans in, closing the distance between you two.
without stopping yourself, you reach up and push his blonde bangs aside. it’s such a small act but it feels so intimate to you. “you’re bleeding.” you say, examining the cut near his lip.
you’re so close to him that he can smell your laundry detergent and vanilla lotion, and it’s safe to say that it’s driving him crazy. “is it cherry?” he suddenly says, breaking the unspoken tension.
“what?” your brows crease in confusion.
“your lip gloss, is it cherry?” he repeats. you nod, still confused. he reopens the water bottle and there’s a faint outline of your lips stamped with cherry flavored lip gloss on the bottle.
your jaw falls gently open as you realize you had been taking sips throughout the round. “sorry.” you say sheepishly.
“don’t apologize,” jungwon leans in even closer and lowers his lips to your ear, “ i bet the real thing’s even better.”
the bell rings again and the announcer calls jungwon’s name for the next match, and he walks away toward the ring, glancing back at you with dilated eyes.
#imagines#kpop#enhypen#fanfic#fiction#writing#jungwon#yang jungwon#lee heeseung#heeseung#park jongseong#jay#sim jake#jake#park sunghoon#sunghoon#kim sunoo#sunoo#nishimura niki#niki#jungwon enhypen#jungwon x reader#enhypen x reader#enhypen niki#enhypen jake#enhypen sunghoon#enhypen jay#sunoo enhypen#heeseung enhypen#enhypen imagines
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l.sm — your own sweet sex-god
pairing : bsf!lee seokmin x reader synopsis : you did not expect to witness your otherwise seokmin's heavenly body tonight. you also didn't think you'd end up in his bed. tho, you're not complaining about it. w.c. : 2.1 k tw : oral (m rec), dirty talking, mentions of breakup, mentions of dk's hookup, very explicit description of dk's body (yes its a warning), subby seokmin, cum swallowing
The breakup didn’t hurt as much as it bruised your pride. You’d seen it coming from a mile away; in truth, you'd expected to be the one to call it off. But here you were, newly single, dumped, and, oddly, more aggravated than heartbroken. Frustration simmered under your skin, and in that moment, all you wanted was to vent to Seokmin, your best friend, the one person who could make everything right with his warm smile and endless patience. So, with little thought, you found yourself heading to his place unannounced.
When Seokmin answered the door, though, all thoughts of your ex fell away in a heartbeat.
He was…different. Shirtless, firstly, his bare torso, shining with a thin layer of sweat in the dim light of the hallway, just open and out there for you to gawk at. Your eyes began at his broad shoulders, down his sharp collarbones, lingering over his chocolatey nipples decorating his pecs, the defined lines of his abs -- he'd been really working lately, and it was showing now -- and of his sharp v dissapearing inside the elastic of his loosely hung grey sweat. god, those grey sweats, that as you ogled further, made obvious of the line of his dick (and god, that was BIG), and hence, the obvious lack of his underwear. you stared a second longer before your eyes snapped back up to his eyes.
Seokmin’s eyes widened as he realized who was standing there, and his lips turned up in that familiar, disarming smile. “O-oh, uhm, hey… What brings you here?”
You tried to summon the words you’d rehearsed in your head, but suddenly they felt silly. The whole “I-just-got-dumped-and-I’m-annoyed” speech faded away as you took in the Seokmin in front of you—powerfully attractive, and clearly freshly sexed with how good he smelled right now. The disheveled girl you’d passed in the lobby made sense now, and somehow, that knowledge made you feel…jealous?
It surprised you how badly you wanted to know if she meant something to him.
He seemed oblivious to your racing thoughts and gestured for you to come in. “I’ll get you a drink. Come in, relax.”
Seokmin moved to his bedroom to grab a shirt, -- you'd lie if you said you didn't stare at his beautifully plump ass as he turned his back to you-- leaving you momentarily alone in the living room, your mind still reeling. It wasn’t the time or place to entertain the fantasies that started to swirl in your head—images of those strong hands on you, that laugh as he held you close, your fingers running along his jawline and his against your something else. But it was difficult not to feel the pull of attraction, now almost impossible to ignore.
He returned, looking a little more like the Seokmin you knew, wearing a simple pastel henley shirt. But every time your eyes flicked to his lips or the lingering sight of his toned body, the air between you felt charged with something new.
“Alright,” he said, handing you a warm cup of tea and giving you his full attention. “What happened?”
You tried to recount the breakup, but even to your ears, it sounded flat, a half-hearted retelling of events that didn’t truly matter anymore. Every time you glanced his way, your eyes kept lingering over his features, imagining his hands on your skin. You barely registered the comforting words he offered about how you “deserved so much better” and that your ex was clearly clueless to let you go.
Eventually, you found yourself retreating to the guest room—your room, as Seokmin always called it, since he kept it prepared just for you, cozy and warm. You tried to shake off the vivid daydreams filling your mind as you lied down on the bed, but it was no use. After what felt like hours of tossing and turning, your hands inside your pants, an attempt (and failing) to quell the ache that had only grown stronger with every new thought of Seokmin.
But it wasn’t enough. Nothing seemed to ease the tension building inside you, not when every thought was filled with Seokmin’s face, his body, his touch. If only he was touching you with his own fingers.
Frustrated, you found yourself standing, almost as if on autopilot, and made your way to his bedroom. You hesitated for just a moment, but the need inside you pushed you forward. Seokmin glanced at you from his bed and before either of you knew, you were on top of him, your knees trapping his hips on either side, your hands pinning his, your faces close. he didn't stop you. you took that as sign to lean in closer and felt his breath hitch, his heart eating faster, eyes wide as your hair brushed against the side of his face. "y/n..."
“God, Seokmin,” you whispered, "whats wrong with me. why are you making me so damn wet..."
"I-i?" His question was so stupid. Of course him. Of course its him with that fucking sex-god body. His knee raised, thigh proding between your legs, making you whine.
"Yes, you. You are the one whos made me this wet, and now you need to take care of it."
Thats the only words seokmin needed before he flips you over on your back, getting on top of you. "Can I?"
the audacity to even ask that. You didnt bother an answer, just pulled him by the neck, capturing his lips with yours. He moaned in your mouth. you both kissed each other with such passion that made you wonder if Seokmin had thought of kissing you like this before. you two looked less like kissing and more like two snakes trying to bite into each other's mouth. when he pulled away, it was only to breathe, because you both did forget to breathe with how hot that kiss was.
You took that chance to flip him back. you began kissing down his neck, down his shoulders, making him moan and gasp and yelp everytime you bit too hard. you sucked on the would and licked it nastily, marking him yours with how dark the marks were gonna get. you pulled his shirt off and threw it aside, almost with anger, because how dare his shirts hide that god-bod from you for so long. you instantly bit his nipples, making seokmin gasp, fingers tightening in your hair. you licked over his nipple again, relishing in the sweat and metal-y taste.
you continued biting and licking and kissing and marking him, moving lower and lower till you reached the hem of his sweats. you looked up at him with half lidded eyes as you slid your tongue along his hardened length through the fabric of his sweats,watching his head throwing back with a gasp. "God, Seokmin, you're so damn slutty, still not wearing any underwear. You must wanna flaunt this to me, don't you?"
you gave a oen mouthed kiss over his crotch, wetting the fabric and making it even thinner.
"I-i, no, fuck. y/n, ngh, s-slow down." he was beyond forming coherent words as you sucked over his length from over his sweats, the taste of his precum almost immediately hitting your tongue. "Feel so good, aah-"
His words faded into a soft gasp as you pressed your lips over him again, just firm enough to make him shiver, his resolve unraveling with every slow, deliberate touch. Each press of your mouth felt electric, like a spark building between you both, until he was gripping the edge of the bed, breath catching in shallow bursts.
When you finally hooked your fingers into the waistband of his sweats and began to pull them down, his anticipation was palpable. His length was hard and flushed, wet with your spit and his precum that leaked enough to make it look like he already came, and you felt a surge of confidence seeing how much he was affected by you. you took him whole in your mouth, going down on him till you could feel his tip hitting the back of your throat.
He groaned, his hands curling in the sheets, and you could feel every inch of his reaction, his muscles tensing under your touch. With every movement, every teasing glide, he became more and more undone, his breathing shallow and quick. you bobbed your head up and down, the obscene gurgling noise loud as you swallowed around him. He came soon, down your throat without any warning except the exceptionally loud and beautifully broken cry from his mouth. you coughed as you pulled out, grinning mischievously as you opened your mouth and showed him that you drank it all up.
Seokmin’s chest heaved, his eyes barely open as he lay there, still catching his breath. But you weren’t about to let him rest. Without a word, you moved over him, your fingers of one hand grazing his shoulders, holding him down as you settled in his lap, your other hand holding his dick up as you sat on it. His body was still sensitive, and the moment you pressed your hips down, a soft, helpless sound escaped him.
"Sensitive much, Minnie?” you murmured, leaning close, a hint of mischief in your tone. His cheeks flushed, but he couldn’t look away, his hands instinctively coming to your hips as he tried to steady himself, clearly caught off guard by your boldness.
But you weren’t giving him a moment to adjust. As you moved, he let out a moan, his hands gripping your waist a little tighter, unable to keep himself from reacting to every movement. His eyes were hazy, completely overwhelmed, and as you leaned down, your fingers found their way into his hair, tugging just enough to make him look up at you.
“By the way,” you whispered, a teasing smile playing on your lips. “Who was the girl in the elevator earlier? A girlfriend? Casual fling? A friend with benefits I don't know about?”
His eyes went wide, and you saw a flicker of nervousness there, breath hitching as he tried to answer. “N-no, it was a tinder match. We just… It was nothing serious, just…you know…” His voice trailed off, his cheeks turning pinker as he tried to find the words. "Some handsy stuff, that's all."
Your smirk grew, and you gave his hair another gentle tug, making him meet your gaze fully. “Nothing serious, huh?” You leaned down, your voice a whisper against his lips. “You're such a slut, baby, getting two girls in your bed in the same night, and still being so needy.”
That comment had him flustered, his cheeks turning an even deeper shade of red as he stammered out something incoherent, his hips betraying him as they jerked upward instinctively. "Y-you're the one fucking your best friend the first night after your b-breakup!" Seokmin attempted to fight back, but it was still useless, and it made you chuckle cruelly. It was clear he was lost to the moment, every word from you pulling him deeper under your spell, his reactions belying just how much he was enjoying the teasing.
You didn’t let up, watching as he tried to hold back his reactions, utterly captivated by you, his every breath quickening as you took full control of the moment. Each movement, each teasing word left him completely at your mercy, a sight you could get used to.
You leaned back, riding him faster, earning a stuttering long whimper from him. His fingers reached between your legs, touching your clit to bring you as close to orgasm as he was. His other hand slipping upwards, grabbing one of your boobs gently squeezing.
"Y-y/n! Nghh- I am cumming again." Seokmin said, eyes shut of embarrassment, cheeks flushed and chest heaving. You would tease his state more, if not for how close to cumming you were yourself. "I wanna cum with you."
Your hips rolled faster, seokmin's own hips jerking up to meet yours, impatient. With a shared guttereal moan you both came. You collapsed on his chest, your hips still rolling slowly, riding out the waves of pleasure.
You lazily looked up at Seokmin. Red swollen lips, sweaty blushed cheeks and droopy eyes staring back at you. Face fucked. As much as you loved your sweet, innocent-looking best friend Seokmin, you could do get used to this version of him. Maybe have something more with him.
#svt smut#svt#seventeen#svt imagines#svt x reader#seventeen smut#seventeen headcanons#svt headcanons#dk#dk headcanons#dk smut#dk x reader#seokmin smut#seokmin#lee seokmin#seokmin x reader#dokyeom#dokyeom x reader#dokyeom smut
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imagine Chris reaction when he seems edits to his gf (us) with audios like “my pussys hood that’s why I got 2 baby daddies” or like p power and shit like…
He obv reposts them immediately
p power - c. & m. sturniolo
in which ... chris sees an edit of you to p power, sparking an idea that includes his brother. ( boyfriend!chris x black!fem!reader x bsf!matt )
warnings ; smut, threesome, missionary, dacryphilia, oral ( fem & male receiving ), soft!dom!matt, rough!dom!chris
"𝒕𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝒎𝒚 𝒃𝒓𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓, '𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔'."
˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰
chris was bored.
you were in the shower at the moment, and chris knew you'd take a while since you had just gotten in. he was laid back on you guys' shared bed, scrolling through his phone mindlessly.
he decided to open up tiktok, figuring it'd be more entertaining then whatever he was looking at on instagram at the moment — he seen some random videos, some making him chuckle a bit as he reposted them.
a thumbnail of you was on the cover of a video, causing him to stop scrolling. the first clip was you posing before throwing it back to a tiktok chris remembered you filming a few days ago — the edit audio was to p power by gunna and drake.
the editor used a few scenes of you in the triplets videos as well as you making your own tiktoks — he bit his lip he watched it, feeling the heat rush to his dick as he realizes he's getting hard now. he reposted the edit then clicked off of tiktok, his brain working a mile per minute.
when they edited you, they used a clip of you hugging on himself and matt, which caused an idea to brew in his brain — chris knew you would be down for anything when it came to you guys' sex life, as long as you both were in agreeance of it.
before you guys dated, you had mentioned that when you hooked up in the past you were open to threesomes and even participated in them at times — you explained to him that you had a male and female partners, two other female partners, but you'd never had two male partners before.
and that's where his idea came in, especially when he saw one of his brothers in the clip.
suddenly the water to the shower turned off, letting chris know that you had finally gotten out of the shower. he smirked to himself as the gears turned in his brain, setting his phone down on the small table next to the bed.
you exited the bathroom, your hair put up in a towel as water droplets dripped off your brown skin — chris wanted to take you right there, but he needed to act a certain way in order for his plan to work.
"hi, baby!" you called in a sing song way, grinning as you made your way towards him.
but before you reached him, he quickly got up from the bed and walked around you, causing you to furrow your eyebrows with a confused expression. "okay, are you good?"
"am i good?" he mocks you with a scoff, "i'm fine, y/n."
"you don't sound like it," you pouted, scoffing as you wrapped your towel around yourself tighter, "how bout you go cool off until you can learn to stop having an attitude?"
chris chuckles dryly at this, moving to grab his phone from the table and bumping your shoulder as he exits his room. you stare after him in shock as he closes the door behind, causing you to shake your head as you drop your towel from around you.
chris's sudden attitude with you was puzzling, as you both were just fine before you had even gotten in the shower. it pissed you off, because when you had originally gotten out you had planned on trying to spend some time with him.
now you were left to your own devices.
unbeknownst to you, chris had made his way into matt's room. the second oldest triplet brother was sitting in his gaming chair scrolling through his phone, with music playing in the background softly.
he walked inside his room and flopped backwards on his bed, putting both of his hands under his head as he stared up at the ceiling.
"so you're just gonna come in and not even say why you're in here?" matt asks his brother, obviously slightly annoyed with his lack of speech.
"have you ever thought about fucking my girl?" chris says randomly, looking over at matt.
the question catches matt off guard, and his eyes widen at this — he wasn't gonna sit there and act like he definitely didn't find you attractive, because he most definitely did. and something he never admitted to chris was he had a wet dream about you before, and it'd been eating him alive ever since. so when chris asked this question, he couldn't tell if it was a setup or not.
"i mean y/n is very attractive, but..." matt starts, his cheeks reddening as he sets his phone in his lap and rubs the back of his head.
"so you'd hit if i let you?" chris asks with raised eyebrows, his lip slightly upturning.
matt's confused at the way he seems to find the situation funny. "i'm not necessarily....opposed?"
a few minutes later, you sat on the heels of your feet as your vibrator worked on your clit — low moans escaped your lips, as you were careful not to let anyone hear.
music was playing throughout chris's room to drown out your lewd noises, but unfortunately it didn't do anything to help as matt slowly creeped up to chris's room.
you had forgotten to lock the door, which gave matt access to open the door slightly as you continued blissfully.
the first thing he noticed was how wet your pussy was, instantly causing heat to rush to his dick as he watched you pleasure yourself. your soft whines were like music to his ears as he closes the door behind him before slowly making his way towards you.
it was as if you sensed a presence behind you, causing your head to whip around — your eyes widened as matt stood there, a smirk on his face as he watched you.
"matt...what are you do-"
"don't let me stop you, y/n," matt quickly interrupts you, causing confusion to blossom as you looked at him with scrunched eyebrows, "chris not making you feel good enough?"
you bite your lip and let out a breath as you set the vibrator on the side of the bed and look at matt wearily. "he had an attitude with me earlier, so i took matters into my own hands."
"he's foolish to have made you play with yourself," matt tuts, shaking his head as he walks closer to the bed.
he stops in front of you as you look up at him with doe eyes, embarrassingly thinking about how matt's words made you even more wet. he swipes his thumb across your chin, poising you to look up at him. "you want some help from me, sweetheart?"
"but matt..." you say shakily, as his cold ringed finger caresses your cheek, "i can't cheat on chris..."
"guess you'll have to be quiet then princess, hm?" matt grins, licking his lips and you nod.
you felt terrible for betraying chris, but you couldn't deny the fact that you've thought about what matt was like in bed. he motioned for you to lay back and you obliged, moving backwards onto the bed as he crawled over you and looked down at you.
"such a pretty girl," matt hums, pressing a kiss to your jaw, causing you to whimper slightly, "gonna make you feel so good."
he pressed wet, opened mouth kisses along both sides of your jaw but you felt yourself growing impatient as he was nowhere near where he needed him the most. he kisses all the way to the middle of your cleavage, kissing the valley of your breasts as he took your right nipple into his mouth, biting and sucking it.
"mhm, matt," you whined, tugging on his brown locs as he massaged your left tit with his other hand.
he kept eye contact with you as he switched, taking your left nipple into his mouth, sucking at the sensitive bud as he massages your right tit.
"please matt, touch me," you whine out, bucking your hips as it meets matt's clothed, but prominent erection.
"you want me to do what princess?" matt asks you with a smirk, raising up from you slightly.
"i want you to touch me," you beg, looking up at him with pleading eyes.
"look at that, you're such a slut," chris's voice suddenly comes, causing matt to smirk wider as he completely gets up.
your eyes widen as chris goes to stand next to matt, both men crossing their hands over their chest as they stare down at you with smirks plastered on their faces.
"w-what?" you say, looking back and forth between the two of them, "i-"
"bet you always thought about fucking my brother, haven't you?" chris continues, licking his lips as he eyes you.
you pout slightly at this, putting your head down in shame which confirmed his suspicions — he chuckled darkly at this, stepping forward and gripping your chin harshly, forcing you to look up at him.
"well i'm giving you the opportunity," he tells you, his eyes darkening as he looks down at you, "you gonna be a good girl and let matt fuck you?"
"yes," you mutter meekly, causing chris to let go of your chin as he backed away from you.
he nods to matt, who immediately steps foward and smashes his lips on yours, knocking you back onto the bed — matt's hands roam all over your body as he slips his tongue into your mouth, teeth clashing.
chris goes to sit in his own gaming chair, his eyes never leaving you as he watches the way his brother his about to ruin you.
matt quickly wastes no time in pulling his pants and boxers down, his hardened cock springing out and leaking with precum — you marvel at his length with wide eyes, chris watching your expression contort as his eyes traveled down to your soaked core, causing the erection in his pants to strain as he begins palming himself through his pants.
matt aligns himself with your entrance, lubricating his cock with your juices before slamming into you eliciting a loud moan to ripple from your chest.
"f-fuck!" you scream out, your back arching as matt begins ramming into you.
"don't be shy with her, she likes it rough," chris smirks at you, still palming himself, "don't you, y/n?"
"mhmph," your muffled voice sounds, as you grip the sheets, feeling all your senses being knocked out of you as matt continues his assault inside you.
"so tight, fuck," matt groans, throwing his back, his chain dangling above you as his cock slides in and out of your walls.
"you close yet, baby?" chris asks you, his eyes glazed over as they're clouded with lust.
you're too caught up in the way matt is pleasuring you to notice that chris was speaking to you, having had your nails digging into matt's back — he gently grabbed your chin forcing you to look over at chris, who smirked. "answer him, sweetheart."
"m'close," you whimper out, "m'gonna cum..."
"hold it y/n," matt grunts out softly, causing you to whimper in protest.
"but i-"
"you better hold it," chris sneers at you, and you pout when you lock eyes with his taunting gaze.
but you couldn't help it — the way matt's cock was hitting your cervix drove you over the edge, and you couldn't hold it; with a loud moan, you came around his cock. matt lets out a low moan as his cock twitches inside of you before he pulls out — he pumped himself twice before his hot, sticky cum painted your abdomen.
chris's eyes darken as he sees that you did not listen to instructions — you knew from the way he gripped his chair before standing up that you were in big trouble.
matt, still trying to catch his breath gets up from the bed and plants a kiss on your forehead before he turns to chris with a grin, holding his hand out to dap him up. chris daps him up and matt quickly moves to the bathroom.
in a weak attempt to flee from punishment you turn on your backside and crawl towards the other side of the bed — but chris is quick to grip your legs and drag you back to his side of the bed.
"what did i tell you?" chris seethes, pushing you so that your face is stuffed into the pillow and pulling your ass up in the air. he sends a smack to it, causing you to whimper loudly. "didn't i tell you to hold it, you slut?"
"i-im sorry..." you mumble, but chris just shakes his head and tuts as he hurriedly goes down to be level with your pussy.
"should've thought about that earlier, ma," chris taunts, rubbing his fingers along your folds causing you to moan, "you know what happens when you don't listen."
chris wastes no time in licking a stripe up your clit, eliciting a moan from you as he grips onto your thighs to keep you steady. his tongue delves into your folds, eating you out like there's no tomorrow.
"fuck baby, fuck!" you blabber out, moaning as chris pulls your pussy impossibly closer to his face.
he adds a finger inside of you as he continues lapping at your pussy like a starved man — you feel yourself becoming overstimulated, but you knew this was nothing compared to what he had in store for you.
suddenly matt comes back into the room with a smirk, his eyes immediately darting to your soaked pussy as chris ate you out. matt goes to lean on the bed in front of you, lifting your chin so that you're facing him.
"think you can make me feel good at the same time, princess?" matt smirks down at you, and you nod as another moan escapes your lips.
"need you in my mouth please," you whimper out, "y-yes, right there chris!"
he sends another smack to your ass as he becomes pussy drunk now — his movements with his tongue increase, as he speeds his fingers up.
matt slides his sweats and boxers down once again, revealing his already hard again cock. your mouth waters as he strokes himself twice before he aligns it with your mouth.
"open up, pretty girl," matt directs you.
you whimper and open your mouth, matt slipping his cock into your mouth — he lets out a low grunt as he begins to slowly move his hips forward, his cock hitting the walls of your mouth.
you feel your orgasm from chris approach quickly, but before you can, he stops his movements. matt begins fucking into your mouth at a rapid pace, his hand going down to grip your hair as his head is thrown back in pleasure.
"such a good slut," matt praises, "letting us use you like this."
chris snickers as he quickly rids himself of his own sweats and boxers, his erection painfully throbbing as he lines himself with your dripping core. you moan around matt's cock when chris slides into you.
"you're so tight baby," chris says, leaving a kiss on your back as he bottoms out inside of you, "fuck..."
he begins pounding into you at an animalistic pace — you feel yourself quickly getting overstimulated, nevertheless you loved it. you look up at matt with your doe eyes as he continues fucking into your mouth.
"gonna let me cum in your mouth, pretty?" matt asks you and you moan around his cock as a response.
his cock twitches inside you, and he takes it out with a pop — you open your mouth wide as matt shoots spurts of his hot cum inside of your mouth. you swallow every drop as he looks down at you in admiration.
"don't forget about me baby," chris grunts, his grip on your ass tight as he lands a smack to it, quickly rubbing it as his cock slides in and out of you.
"please chris, faster," you moan hoarsely, gripping the sheets in front of you as your back is arched, "feels s-so good..."
"such a tight pussy, could stay in it for hours," chris moans lowly, his head thrown back as he repeatedly pounds into you, "look at you, taking me so well."
"you close yet?" chris asks you, your response a muffled whine to let him know you were.
"yes p-please i need to cum-"
"hold it," chris says coldly, pulling out of you.
you're confused until he flips you over, slamming into you again causing you to cry out. "fuck chris! it's too much!"
"you know your safe word, ma," chris tells you, throwing both your legs over his shoulder, "look at me."
you forcefully grips your chin to make you face him — sweat beads his forehead as his hair sprawled out across his forehead whilst he continues to ram in and out of you. chris looks down at where his cock meets your stomach, pressing down on it before he looks back up at you. "feel me right there, baby?"
"mhm," you moan, nails scratching his back as you're sure there will be marks there, "please let me cum, chris..."
"don't you dare till i so," chris grunts, leaving sloppy open-mouthed kisses on your neck, "fuck, m'close. gonna let me feel you up?"
"please," you whine, your back arched.
chris's cock twitches inside of you, telling you he was about to cum — with a loud moan of your name, his hot cum shoots inside of you, painting your walls a creamy white. however, his thrusts don't cease and you cum right after, your juices mixing with his as you let out a loud moan.
he helps the both of you ride out your orgasms then he slowly pulls out of you with a hiss — he presses a kiss to your cheek before falling down beside you.
your legs are sore and you're incredibly tired — chris notices the way you're struggling to move, opting to get up and carry you towards the bathroom where matt currently was. the middle triplet notices and opens the door wider, moving aside so that chris can place you on the toilet.
"i was just getting a towel," matt tells his brother, before looking down at you, "you alright, y/n?"
"yeah," you nod sheepishly, as chris takes the towel and begins to clean you up gently.
"was that too much for you, mamas?" chris asks you softly looking into your eyes for any signs of uncomforting feelings. "were you okay with matt, too?"
"don't worry, it was okay," you tell him with a smile to which he smiles and places a soft kiss to your temple, "will that be a regular thing?"
"only if you're comfortable with it," chris tells you but a smirk tugs at his face, "but not likely, cause this pussy's mine."
"hey y/n, you want anything to eat?" matt asks, peeking his head in the bathroom doorway.
"i'm starving, yes!" you tell him, and he clicks his tongue and nods before leaving again.
"let me get fresh sheets real quick," chris says, "you take a shower then when we get out we can watch a movie and eat?"
"sounds good, thank you baby," you smile.
"i love you, angel," chris says, planting another kiss to your lips.
( lilly's section 💌 )
for my girls !! @muwapsturniolo , @thenickgirl , @luverboychris , @guccifrog ! i love y'all, m'sorry ts shit took so long😭😭🤍. this is my FIRST 3some smut fic, ntm on me if it was bad y'all....
hope you enjoyed nevertheless !💌
@luverboychris @muwapsturniolo @mrssturnioloo @mattsturniolosleftnut @sturnprime @thenickgirl @guccifrog @nickgetsmewetter @eyeliketoeatpoosay @e1ias3 @sp3aknaur @middlepartmatt @summerssover @riasturns @sturn777 @l0akkzz @hysteria-things @pinksturniolo @chrissturniolossidehoe @chris-slut @hoesformatt @raysmayhem-72 @lanas-doll @chrisssluttywaist @mbbsgf @jetaimevous @matthewscorner @chaossturns
#sturniolo triplets#mattslolita 💌#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo imagine#chris sturniolo x you#chris sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo fanfic#christopher owen sturniolo#christopher sturniolo x reader#sturniolo smut#the sturniolos#the sturniolo triplets#matthew sturniolo#matthew sturniolo x reader#matthew bernard sturniolo#matthew sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo imagines#matt sturniolo fanfiction#matt sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo fanfic#christopher sturniolo smut#sturniolos#sturniolo fandom#sturniolo triplets imagine
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꒰ NEVER A BURDEN ! ۟ ׅ ͡ ୨ৎ
(🐰) ──𝓟ARK JISUNG﹙ 지성 ﹚ ꒰ 𝓰. oneshot ៸ fluff ៸ friends to ?? ୨୧ㅤㅤ WARNiNGS : not proofread ៸ fight ៸ petnames ៸ mean girls ❞ bsf! 𝒿isung x 𝑓! reader ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ꒰ WC : 1.5K ꒱ SYPNOSiS 𐙚 in which you, a bubbly chatterbox, and your quiet, shy and reserved crush face a misunderstanding that forces both your feelings to the surface, leading to you avoid jisung like the plague .ᐟ HEAVILY INSPIRED BY WIFTY ── LiBRARY
THE CLASSROOM WAS ALIVE WITH ITS TYPICAL CHAOS AS PER USUAL.
the rustling of papers, the whispers of conversations exchanged between friends, and the occasional snickers of laughter.
you thrived in moments like this, pushing through the crowded rows of desks with a beaming smile and a seemingly endless stream of stories to tell.
and, of course, there was park jisung.
quiet, reserved, and hunched over his studying notes, jisung sat at his usual seat by the window, his expression looking more tired and stressed than usual.
you didn’t know what had exactly drawn you to him initially—maybe it was his quiet presence, the calm that had always seemed to follow him wherever he went. ── 𝖱𝖤𝖲𝖳 𝖡𝖤𝖫𝖮𝖶!
or maybe it was the way he always listened, even when you talked a mile a minute about the most random things.
you weren’t oblivious to what people said about you and jisung—the whispers that followed you down the hallways, the teasing smiles from classmates when they saw you together.
everyone thought you were too much for him, like a bright flame paired with an unmovable stone. but you didn’t care.
at least, you didn’t think you did.
today was no different—at least, it hadn’t started that way. you perched on the edge of jisung’s desk, chattering away as he scribbled in his notebook.
he didn’t say much, just an occasional hum of acknowledgment or a slight nod of his head. but to you, that was enough.
“ji, get this,” you began, leaning closer to him as your hands slapped the table dramatically. “i was walking home yesterday, and this dog—this huge scary dog—came out of nowhere and—”
“y/n,” jisung interrupted, his voice sharp and dismissive.
you froze mid-sentence, blinking at him in surprise.
he sighed, not looking up from his notes. “can you please do me a favour and shut up for a second?”
the silence hung thick in the air.
you blinked again, the smile fading from your face as the classroom noise around you suddenly felt deafening.
“oh,” you mumbled, quickly stepping back from his desk. “okay.”
you turned around before he could say anything else, slipping back into your seat and pulling out your notebook in front of you.
your heart felt heavy, the sting of his words settling deep inside your chest.
behind you, the whispers started almost immediately.
“oh my god.. did you hear that?”
“i mean, he’s not wrong. she’s so loud.”
“doesn’t she know he doesn’t even like her?”
“she’s been following him around for months. it’s so obvious.”
you bit your lip, keeping your head down as their words echoed in your ears. normally, you’d brush it off, but today—today it felt like they were right about you all along.
the rest of the day passed in a blur—you avoided jisung as much as possible, slipping out of the classroom as soon as the bell rang and keeping a notable distance whenever you passed him in the hall.
by the time the final bell rang, signaling the end of the day, you were exhausted—emotionally and physically.
you stood by your locker, pretending to reorganize your books as you watched jisung leave the classroom.
normally, you’d catch up with him and walk to the bus stop together, but today, you let him walk ahead.
at the bus stop, your absence didn’t go unnoticed.
“where’s y/n?” jaemin asked, leaning lazily against the bench. jisung shrugged, his hands stuffed into his pockets as he slightly smiled picturing you running after him just to sit on the bus with him. “i don’t know.”
“you don’t know?” chenle repeated, his tone confused. “you always know. did she get in trouble or something?”
jisung shook his head, though his jaw tightened slightly as he remembered what he said to you a few hours ago. “no..why?”
renjun raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest. “because she’s not here. and the last time i checked, she would rather die than miss a bus ride with you.”
jisung didn’t respond. instead, he stared at the concrete, his hands fidgeting slightly as the bus pulled up.
he didn’t know how to explain the sudden ache in his chest, the uncomfortable emptiness that came with your absence.
when he boarded the bus and saw you sitting in a seat near the front—alone, it hit him all over again.
you didn’t even glance his way as he walked past, sliding into a seat a few rows behind you.
normally, you’d save the seat beside you for him, grinning and waving him over like he was the most important person in the world.
but today, there was only silence.
the bus ride was quiet, other than the occasional whispers of other passengers. jisung spent the entire time staring at the back of your head, his thoughts racing.
he wanted to say something, to apologize, but he quite literally didn’t know how—the words were stuck in his throat.
when the bus finally reached your stop, you got up without looking back, walking silently toward the door.
jisung followed, trailing a few steps behind as you both began the familiar walk home. normally, you’d fill the air with stories and your laughter, your voice the soundtrack to his otherwise quiet life.
but now, there was only the sound of your footsteps, each one heavier than the last.
finally, jisung couldn’t take it anymore.
“y/n,” he said softly, his voice barely audible over the crunch of gravel beneath your feet.
you stopped walking but didn’t turn around. “what?” his heart sank at the coldness in your tone. “are you… mad at me?”
you laughed bitterly, the sound hollow. “mad? no, jisung. i’m not mad.” you turned to face him, and his breath caught in his throat at the sight of your glassy, tear-filled eyes. “i’m hurt.”
the guilt hit him like a slap.
“you told me to shut up,” you continued, your voice trembling. “do you know how much that hurt? and do you know what people say about me? they say you don’t even like me. that i’m just some annoying girl who follows you around. and today, it felt like they were right. like i really am just a burden to you.”
“no,” jisung said immediately, his voice firm and filled with held-back emotion. “that’s not true, y/n. none of that is true.”
“then why did you say it?” you asked, tears rolling down your cheeks now. “why did you tell me to shut up if you don’t think i’m annoying?”
“i was stressed,” he admitted, his shoulders slumping. “i’ve been studying so much, and i wasn’t thinking. i was stupid, and i took it out on you. but y/n…” he stepped closer, his hands trembling slightly as he reached out to touch your shoulder.
“i promise you—you’re not a burden. you’re never a burden. you’re the best part of my day.”
your breath hitched, your heart fluttering at his words.
“i mean it,” he said, his voice filled with vulnerability. “i don’t care what anyone else says. i care about you. you make everything better, even when i’m too stupid to see it.”
before you could respond, jisung pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly against his chest.
his embrace was hesitant at first, like he wasn’t sure if you’d let him, but when you didn’t pull away, he held you tighter.
“i’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice muffled against your hair. “i’m so, so sorry. please don’t avoid me anymore.”
you let out a shaky breath, your hands clutching the fabric of his shirt as you buried your face in his chest. “i just thought…” you trailed off, your voice quiet.
“you don’t have to think anything,” he mumbled, pulling back just enough to look at you. his hands cupped your face, his thumbs gently wiping away your tears.
“just know that i’m here, and i care about you. okay?” you nodded, your cheeks heating under his soft gaze.
the walk home felt different this time. jisung held your hand the entire way, his grip warm and reassuring.
you felt shy now, hyper-aware of every little movement, and every little glance. the air between you was quieter than usual, but it wasn’t uncomfortable—it was gentle and comforting.
when you reached your door, you turned to thank him, but before you could say anything, jisung hesitated.
the tip of his ears were a bright red, and before you could process what was happening, he gently spun you around and pressed a quick kiss to your forehead.
your eyes widened, your heart skipping a beat as you stared at him. his cheeks were undeniably pink now, and he stepped back, avoiding your gaze.
“i—i’ll see you tomorrow,” he mumbled, quickly turning and walking away in the direction of his house.
you stood there for a moment, stunned, before a small grin tugged at the corner of your lips.
maybe jisung wasn’t great with emotions—his words and actions, but in that moment, he’d said everything you needed to hear.
© FAIRQVES 2025 do not repost, plagiarize, or translate.
NOTE. ohmgee guys i pulled jaemin in my dreamscape album !!! anyways jisung is so zhang lurang coded u cannot convince me otherwise. also jaemin is so duan jiaxu coded too… my brain is braining rn 😇
୨୧ TAGLIST OPEN ‹𝟹 @mioons @nshmuras @suneng @pnghoon @shawnyle @laylasbunbunny @privareum @briefsaladfun @cyjzzl @sol3chu @txtlyn @d-dilemma @deezbin @iluvnikism @rikibwn @wonsprincess @niawonn @pockyyasii @kiss4noo @nineooooo @loves0ft @ancnymcnzjy @dazzlingjaeyun : COMMENT OR SEND AN ASK TBA.
#࣪ ︵ֺ︵ ㅤlu’s : writes ㅤ𝜚 ۪ ⠀ ⪩⪨#𝑘 ── ✉️#k films#svnet#nct dream imagines#nct dream headcanons#nct dream oneshot#nct dream x reader#nct dream fanfic#nct dream fluff#nct u imagines#nct imagines#nct fanfiction#nct x reader#nct fluff#nct drabbles#park jisung fluff#park jisung x reader#park jisung imagines#park jisung smau#jisung imagines#jisung x reader#nct scenarios#nct fics#nct fanfic#nct u x reader#park jisung fanfic#park jisung oneshot#nct oneshots#nct dream scenarios
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𝐓𝐎𝐎 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐘 ! — (E!42 Miles x Fem!Black Reader)
❀ including: miles being a bit of a simp, reader being a sweetheart & innocent, mutual pining, use of the names: airhead, chica and princesa. miles being whipped for reader, cursing, use of the n word. ❀ Genre: fluff ❀ Summary: reader is having some trouble stuck on a question and bsf miles comes to her aid! Despite you two saying your just ‘good friends’ an outsider looking at you two would say something different.
Back to masterlist . ♬ : her way- partynextdoor
MILES HAD ALWAYS BEEN SCARY BUT HELPFUL TO YOU; Despite people saying that he was in a gang or that he carries knifes you gave him the benefit of the doubt. He was an A+ student and minded his business, so when he silently gave you one of his pencils when he saw you lost your pink one, you gave him a small smile and mouthed a ‘thank you.’ Ever since then he’d always help you silently, holding the back of your chair when he saw your clumsy ass was about to fall. “Stop rockin in the chair airhead.” You’d always roll your eyes before saying, “M not an airhead lil nigga.” Which in turn he would snicker at, knowing that you were smiling despite your words. Miles didn’t know why he had become so fond of you, your music would be almost blasting out of your AirPods at 8am in the morning, you always smelt like candy and vanilla so when you would hug him your smell would rub off on his clothes, your laugh was loud and weird, you’d always check your mirror every 30 minutes despite the fact that you looked pretty as hell every second of every day- shit.
Once he found out the root of his fondness of you he didn’t know what to do, he’s never liked anyone in that sense before. So the question of what to do about it lingered on his mind for the longest time, “Miles? Hellloooo?” You snapped him back into reality with a wave of your hand across his face, “Shit- sorry chica, what’s up.” You sighed, dropping your head onto the library table. Your arms folded over each other as you mumbled beneath your breath, “Even your ass is bored, ughhh im never gonna past this stupid ass test!” You groaned, he smirked at your childlike manner. “Your never gonna pass if you don’t stop whining.” You looked at him from the corner of your eye, the knowing look he gave you made your heart skip. ‘Stupid ass fine ass nigga.’ You thought to yourself before sitting up, avoiding his gaze as you tied your braids in a ponytail before looking at him with a, ‘im tired as hell so please don’t use no big words right now dude’ face. A small smile tugged at his lips, seeing your lips in a slight pout and your tired eyes made him wanna kiss you right there on the spot. “Ya know what, its already late. I’ll let you copy my notes this time chica.” As soon as you heard this it was like all the energy that had once left your body came back, “wait really? Oh my god- thank you milesss.” You let out a sigh of relief, a hand over your heart as you looked at the ceiling. Seeing you so happy over notes made miles wanna let you copy off of him more often, fuck it. Seeing you smile like that for him made him want to make you his.
He saw the looks that other guys gave you and heard how they would talk about you in such a degrading manner and always would put them in their place with a icy glare, but he knew that he couldn’t keep trying to ward off guys when you weren’t his to begin with. The last thing he wanted was for you to be mad at him because he’s scaring off possible boyfriends, though in his defense none of them could treat you as good as him. So when he saw you in the dim lighting of the library, your cute pink and white outfit complimenting your brown skin and braids he knew that he couldn’t wait anymore. He would protect your heart and pretty smile from any assholes that try and take advantage of you.
“I like you chica.”
Bonus <33
+ you literally were in shock at his confession that you sat for almost a minute trying to figure out what to say.
+ ended up telling him you felt the same and that you were glad he told you because ‘he was too fine to be walking around without no girl.’ (He said the same to you <3)
+ walked you home, hugged you anddd gave you a lil kiss before he left.
+ that next morning he surprised you with flowers at your doorstep, putting one in your hair before kissing your cheek. “Mornin princesa.”
#🌸. 𝐀 𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐆𝐍 𝐁𝐘 𝐊𝐀𝐌#atsv fluff#atsv x you#atsv x black reader#atsv miles#42 miles morales#42 miles x fem!reader#earth 42 miles morales x reader#earth 42 miles x reader#miles morales prowler#miles x black reader#miles x y/n#miles morales#earth 42 miles morales x black!reader#earth 42 miles morales x female reader#earth 42 miles morales x you#earth 42 miles x black reader#earth 42 miles x you
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— 09 japan
MASTERLIST | PREV | NEXT
PAIRING: brothers bsf!sughoon x f!reader
WARNINGS: cussing, mentions of sex, mile high club
AUTHORS NOTE: sorry for not updating sooner, schedules a bit cray, BUT WRITTEN CHAP IS NEXT BE EXCITED
taglist: @cornenhapovs @myjaeyuns @magssu @leeknowsgfsblog @luminouskalopsia @jentlecoeur @heeslut4life @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @jaeyungxrl @rapmonie2047 @anormieee @nishislcve @leesura @en-happiness @kimsunoops @heelariously @rikiwaify-blog @ihrtgyuuu @purennn @hoonharem @g0niki @hearts4itoshi @yongbokified @shuichi-sama @xiaoderrrr @hongshuaknow @skylaly @yzzyhee @jwnghyuns @seokseokjinkim @syzavxy @xrvrqs @soulvrs @velvetkisscs @ak-aa-li @eneiyri @starlvcieszsq @meowmeowjang @hanhaeji @moonlighthoon @gaylilseokie @seunghancore @heelovesmeknot @nyfwyeonjun @kookify
#enhypen#enhypen fic#enhypen scenarios#enhypen texts#enhypen smau#park sunghoon#enhypen imagines#fake texts#kpop smau#enhypen smut#park sunghoon x reader#sunghoon smau#sunghoon fluff#enhypen sunghoon#sunghoon x reader#sunghoon smut#sunghoon imagines#sunghoon angst#sunghoon fic#sunghoon#enhypen x female reader#enhypen x reader#park sunghoon x you#sunghoon x you#enhypen social media au#sunghoon social media au#kpop smut#enhypen jungwon#enhypen niki#enhypen jay
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could you do like hcs of Nick meeting and becoming friends with his like favourite singer ever? 😭
(She’s like Billie Eilish level famous)
LOVE YOUR WORK BTW 😻😻
headcannons - n.s x famous reader
pairings: nick sturniolo x bsf reader
summary: headcannons
warning(s): none!
not proofread
it was all fun and games, nick casually going to your concert and getting barricade (love him for that)
singing and screaming to every song you sing because obviously he knows all of them
eventually, you spot him in the crowd, mouthing "oh my god i know you!"
nick absolutely dies. cause wdym his favorite singer ever knows him?? huhh??
after the concert, nick gets asked by security to go backstage to meet you!! (obvi he says yes)
pictues and hugs are exchanged, and bro is absolutely fangirling (as he should)
you guys make a tiktok together and the fans FREAK OUT
"since when are they friends??"
"Y/N AND NICK OMG??"
"WHAT. NICK WITH HIS FAV?? SINCE WHEN??"
and just for shits and giggles you two decide to go live
nick would just be like "hey guys!" and the comments would be confused on where he is
then you'd pop out and the comments would start going 100 miles an hour 😭
its safe to say hundreds of edits are made and you guys become tiktoks new fav duo
people also immediately start shipping you with matt and chris 🙈
you and nick obvi exchange numbers and become best friends, eventually meeting his brothers and becoming close with them too
BONUS:
meeting chris and matt was super fun, they were both really funny and looked exactly like nick, which was expected but still odd to see in person
you really did like meeting both of them, but that was a problem
the whole night you couldnt keep your eyes off of matt, and chris couldnt keep his eyes off of you
matt liked you too, but i dont think it was like that, was it?
chris definitely liked you, but did you like him??
you obviously cant tell nick bc then friendship is obviously ruined, so what do you do?
write an album about it.
the album comes out and fans FREAK OUT. (lots of them suspect its about the triplets but who knows) (they're right ofc)
A/N: why do i really like this omg?? lowk i could turn this into a fic if you guys would be interested
TAGLIST:
@opheliaofficial07 @stargirlv0id @strniolo @annaisabookworm @theperson-nextdoor @its-jennarose @thetriplets3 @gottamakemyhatersmad @luvsturniolo
#madispeaks!#sturniolo triplets#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#fluff#nick sturniolo#matt sturniolo headcannons#chris sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo fanfic#nick sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo edit#nicholas sturniolo#nick sturniolo fic#nick sturniolo headcannon#nick sturniolo headcannons
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adore you. jude bellingham.
summary — jude bellingham x fem!reader | jude posts his best friend on her birthday every year... even the years they distanced... and especially the one they admit their love
note — second post! wanted to say thank u for the love on my first <3 also i love gracie
warnings — none! just fluff
_________________________________________
judebellingham (2019)
judebellingham: happy birthday i guess... you may be 17 but i'm still taller @y/nsusername
—
username: happy bday y/n!!
y/nsusername: i just want my gift
y/nsusername: youve got a good 2 inches on me mate
— judebellingham: a whopping 7 but alright
— y/nsusername: the gift.
yourfriend: bsf looks so good
judebellingham (2020)
judebellingham: wishing my best friend and chauffeur a happy birthday. i love spending time with you, especially when you buy me dinner even on your birthday @y/nsusername
—
username: shes so pretty
username: happy bday!
y/nsusername: lmao ily
y/nsusername: ur the opposite of a gentleman i feel bad for ur future gf
— yourfriend: HEKEKANAHA
yourmom: ❤️❤️
judebellingham (2021)
judebellingham: couldn't miss my favorite day of the year, even miles apart. happy birthday to the one i miss the most who answered every facetime call while i was travelling. always looking back on everything she did for me, she deserves the best day @y/nsusername
—
username: aww
username: WHY IS THIS SO
y/nsusername: 💗💗💗💗💗💗
judebellingham (2022)
judebellingham: finally got an invitation to the one and only y/n's birthday party, she never fails to make me feel special. happy birthday love
—
username: kms
username: the way he puts her on a pedestal
username: cuties reunited
username: "love" can yall just share feelings already omg
yourfriend: life of the party
y/nsusername: so happy to see u❤️🩹😕
y/nsusername: fave rsvp
judebelllingham (2023)
judebellingham: my favorite international holiday where i celebrate my girl. finally getting to call you mine while spoiling you as usual. i appreciate you more than you know and you're the best trophy i could win. i love you, happy birthday darling
—
username: this hit like a TRUCK
username: judes version of hard launch
username: fave day of the year!
username: DARLING OH IM GONE
username: FINALLY.
username: turn it up
yourfriend: pov he grew balls and admitted
— y/nsusername: LEAVE
— judebellingham: i give up
y/nsusername: i lobve u
— judebellingham: i lobve u more
— y/nsusername: oh wait i meant loce
— y/nsusername: what omg love
_________________________________________
#jude bellingham#jude bellingham imagine#jude bellingham smut#jude bellingham fluff#jude bellingham x you#jude bellingham x reader#jude bellingham x fem!reader#jude bellingham oneshot#jude bellingham fic#jude fic#jude x reader#soccer#soccer imagine#football#realmadrid#judebellingham#jude bellingham social media au#fanfic#qraceiuv
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AM ERA! (smau)
— ALEX TURNER
arabella series
pairing: alex turner x fem! actress! reader
summary: some iconic and memorable moments on social media during the am era.
timeline: 2014
note: to clear up any confusion, the song arabella in this universe/series is based on a movie y/n did. + and also this format / layout is heavily inspired by my love @ithinkimokeei 🩶
masterlist!
Liked by yourbestfriend, katiee_cook_ and others
yourinstagram she’s got a barbarella silver swimsuit … 🪽
ㅤ View all the comments
username THIS IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING ‼️
username doing cartwheels across the highway- 🤸♀️ why are they so attractive
username mom and dad looks so hot
breanahelders looking beautiful wifey 😙
yourinstagram got it from you <3
elizabetholsenofficial because i love waking up in the morning getting hit by visuals 😩
username lizzie is so real for that
username mother
username alex looks so fucking good i wanna jump off a cliff
username the fact that y/n didn’t know arabella was about her until a fan told her during a comic con panel will forever not be iconic
username lmao even the mcu cast was shocked that she didn’t know 😭
username had to replay that funny moment between y/n and scarlett where scar almost had a whiplash bc y/n had no idea
username our baby is so clueless it’s so cute
mileskane who’s that sexy cinnamon bun on the left? 😏
yourinstagram definitely not your man
username IM CACKLING SO LOUD
username pls y/n is so savage i love her
mileskane and you’re claiming him as your man?
username ohh dramaaaaa
yourinstagram and what if i did? 👀
username GASP- does this mean that alex and y/n are dating?!!!
mileskane it’s okay luv it’s just a phase it will go away ❤️
username hahaahahahahah miles
username i’m crying this is too funny
katiee_cook_ this comment section is so funny me and jamie are dying from laughter
yourinstagram mileskane unfortunately it is not just a phase 🥲
username wait y/n does this mean you and al are together?!! hello??
username girl you can’t just leave us hanging like that 😭😭 we NEED TO KNOW
username wait so arabella is actually about her?
yourbestfriend those of you who haven’t watched arabella clearly shows
username fr the song doesn’t even make sense if you haven’t watched the movie
username CAN SOMEONE PLS CONFIRM IF THEY’RE DATING??
Liked by yourinstagram, marvel and others
enews to answer the question on y/n’s famous instagram post… the answer is YES! (📷: unknown)
ㅤ View all the comments
username I KNEW IT
username IM CRYING HAPPY TEARS FINALLY
username idk if i wanna be him or be with her
yourbestfriend same
username y/bsf/n is so real for this
username they look so happy
username mileskane has been real quiet ever since enews posted
username i’m fine (i’m not)
username now who leaked these pictures of me and my man? 🤫
yourinstagram first miles and now i have to fight my way through fans 😭 this is a battle
mileskane yeah username get in line 🙄
username speaking of the devil… hi miles!!
username and he has arrived!!
username good luck dealing with seventeen year old girlies who want you dead 🥲
username bro what is marvel doing here liking this post i’m cackling
marvel don’t blame us we were just as curious as you folks 🙈
ㅤ Liked by 34,4k users
username alex could do better than this pretentious hollywood whore
username who are you calling a whore???!
yourbestfriend say that again i dare you bitch
breanahelders if you don’t have anything nice to say then keep it to yourself.
officialelizabetholsen jealousy doesn’t suit you honey. keep that energy elsewhere and let us celebrate this beautiful couple ✨
mileskane yourinstagram do i need to kill someone? just say the word love
username username the gang coming at your bitch
Liked by breanahelders, yourfriend and others
yourinstagram okay… this is the last one i promise 🤭
ㅤ View all the comments
username queen we don’t mind post all you want
username THE HAND REPLACEMENT ALEX
username bi panic
katiee_cook_ obsessed 😍
yourinstagram with you 😙
username the way this music video has a chokehold on me-
youtube the visuals, artistry, lyrics, aesthetics, cinematography is just *chef kiss* ✨✨✨
ㅤ Liked by 99k users
username even youtube is speaking facts
officialelizabetholsen gorgeous gorgeous 💗 we miss you on set, babe!
yourinstagram miss you more, bug!! 🎀
username a match made in heaven
mileskane we get it you guys are couple goals 🙄
matthelders here we go again 🤦🏻
yourinstagram do i complain when you get to have him all by yourself on stage?
mileskane that doesn’t count!
yourinstagram you’re such a drama queen
username their dynamic i love them sm
username miles and y/n fighting over alex is so real bc same
username yourinstagram how does it feel to be a rockstar’s gf 😩 how does it feel to live our dream
yourinstagram it feels amazing 🙈💗
#alex turner masterlist#alex turner angst#alex turner fluff#alex turner fic rec#alex turner x reader#alex turner imagines#captainwans navigation#alex turner one shot#alex turner fic#alex turner imagine#alex turner fanfic#alex turner#arctic monkeys x reader#arctic monkeys masterlist#arctic monkeys#alex turner x fem! reader#alex turner social media au
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˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ forever valentine | CHOI YEONJUN
pairing: bsf!yeonjun x gn!reader
genre: drabble; fluff
wc: 900
warnings: yeonjun being cheesy, lowercase intended, not proofread
a/n: 1/2 of my entry for @matchaxmatcha's valentine's event <3 have a cozy valentine's day guys!
it's been a while since you've exchanged songs with yeonjun, knowing that your best friend has influenced majority of your music taste to this day.
the first time you met, you recommended songs then made each other playlists, and every end of the month you would use a specific website to compare your top ten most played songs from the past month.
your usual hang out consists of sitting around and talking while playing music from your blended playlist, introducing more songs that the other potentially hasn't listened to yet. sometimes you're doing work on your laptop and yeonjun's either playing the music aloud or through his headphones to limit distracting you.
the latter happening right this moment.
your fingers are typing away on your keyboard, thinking face strong, and he's sitting beside you on the couch. from your peripheral vision, you see his black curtain bangs swaying in the same direction he bops his head to the music.
intrigued, you tap on his shoulder and watch him lift the left ear cup, turning his body slightly to give you a yes? expression.
"what song are you listening to?"
"I think you'll like this one, it's best part by daniel caesar." he takes off the headphones and places it over your ears, your hands brush as you adjust it to your ears.
you nod your head from the soothing blend of the artists' voices, a smile appearing on your lips, and when you look over at yeonjun, he's mirroring your expression.
taking off the headphones from your ears, you give them back to yeonjun, and your fingers brushing against each other again.
"connect to the speaker, I don't mind listening." you insist and he does.
"I've been having issues with the app lately." he states, stretching to rest his arm on the back of the sofa behind you.
you scrunch you brows softly, not noticing any issues with yours.
"how so? you gonna complain to them?"
he nods slowly, feigning a confused expression.
"I ought to complain to Spotify for you not being this week's hottest single." he says with full confidence.
you roll your eyes and shake your head at him, laughing at his corny joke. and he joins you.
"that sucked, jjun." you pinch his side in jest and he retracts with a higher pitched laugh.
"but it's true." he whines, "why are you still single?"
his question stops you for a second. he wasn't joking around anymore, if anything he picks up your laptop and places it aside.
"I believe the right one will arrive in due time, is all." you answer him honestly.
he slowly nods.
again, your confused expression returns when he stands up and walks over to the dining room table, carrying out a bag and a small bouquet of flowers.
the muscles in your face relax, your small frown turning into a pout. you've never seen yeonjun so romantic — to anyone else, or to you.
"I didn't know how to come about this, but ___," he takes a breath mid sentence. "will you be my valentine? not just for today, but for next year, and the one after that until the foreseeable future?"
he goes down on one knee with the bouquet of flowers in one hand and the other holding the red gift bag, while you're leaning forwards on the couch.
"yeonjun.." your hands envelope his with the bouquet and he smiles once he feels your thumbs caressing the back of his hand. "I would love to be your valentine."
"forever my valentine?"
"forever your valentine, jjun." you wrap your arms over his shoulders, bringing him to move and sit back on the couch with you.
burying your face into the crook of his neck, you sigh pleasantly in his hold. you weren't in a rush to find a significant other and neither was he, but you always spent time with each other. who knew you the way he did, and vice versa?
you were willing to go the mile with him.
"I have one more thing for you." he places the strings of the gift bag to intertwine with your fingers. "now, you genuinely might think I'm being so corny after this but it's fine." he laughs.
fiddling with the strings, you remove the tape securing the bag and peep inside. you reach into the bag, pulling out what seemed to be an engraved acrylic sheet with the first song yeonjun introduced to you. the song that made you realise just how much you cherish him.
"it is quite corny, but I love it."
you smile up at him and he has that beautiful grin on his face again. the one where his eyes hold so much love and affection, and his grin adorned by his pretty teeth to the point it could be contagious in the best way possible.
"I'm just glad you didn't turn me down." he chuckles sheepishly.
"I'm surprised you even asked in the first place." you place the gifts and flowers aside.
you both lean back on the couch, hands against one another and your fingers fiddling with each others. a new song plays, one that either of you haven't played before but you can tell yeonjun likes it as much as you do.
it was fitting to say the least. a new song to associate this significant moment, and you love it. and so does yeonjun.
#yeonjun fluff#yeonjun x reader#yeonjun soft hours#yeonjun scenarios#yeonjun fics#yeonjun drabble#yeonjun imagines#txt fluff#txt fics#txt imagines#txt scenarios#txt x reader#txt drabble#txt soft hours
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The Ride⚠️
E!42!miles x F!reader
Who doesn’t love a good Miles fic (@everyothermileswriter love ya)
Ntm to say on this one tbh, except that this was my experience learning, when I was with my bsf😭
No warnings ⚠️ that I know off—
Anywys enjoy lovlies⭐️
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“Diablo mami..!” Miles groaned
(Y/N) was shaking from the adrenaline, sweat beads forming on both of their foreheads
(Y/N) speeds up the pace
“Ma, I’m gonna—“
(Y/N) slows down her pace on the motorcycle, ultimately coming to a stop in front of a connivence store
Miles quickly gets off, knees buckling as he kiss the ground in front of him, almost of the verge of throwing up from the dizziness
“Don’t exaggerate babe, I wasn’t THAT bad” (Y/N) says through the helmet, waving him off dismissively
“Tú seguiste, en una luz roja.” He deadpanned, still on the floor (you ran a red light)
Sighing, (Y/N) gets off the motorcycle taking the key out of the ignition
(Y/N) clicks a button on the helmet now being able to see the neon world that is New York
Taking a few steps to her lover, offering a hand to to Miles in invitation to get to which he takes
“I mean YOU did teach me, didn’t you?”
“Oka? But that’s me. I can’t have my pretty girl doing delinquent shit” Miles says rubbing his thumb over the still intertwined hands below
“Hypocrite” (Y/N) mumbles softly letting go, going ahead into the store.
Miles light feet tracing behind her<3
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⚠️⚠️Should I make a part 2/sequel to miles teaching her how to maneuver such a heavy vehicle🧍🏽♀️🧍🏽♀️
BTWWWW This was never meant to b sexual, dirty minds smh :p
#atsv x reader#miles morales fanfiction#miles morales x reader#miles x y/n#atsv fic#miles 42#miles g morales x reader#miles morales#miles morales x y/n#miles x reader#e!42 miles morales#42!miles morales x reader#miles g morales#prowler miles#prowler morales#prowler earth 42#atsv#itsv#Spider-Man atsv#spider man into the spider verse#across the spiderverse#atsv spoilers#across the spider verse spoilers#x reader#atsv miles g#miles g x reader#miles42#earth 42 miles morales x reader#earth 42 miles fluff#earth 42
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One Step Away From You (Chapter 10)
BSF!Eddie Munson x PlusSize!Fem!Reader
Follow my new blog for future chapters & fics @cherryxhaze
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Chapter Summary: You and Eddie attend the concert you gave him tickets to for Christmas. The concert and Eddie's birthday celebration bring up feelings that are getting harder to ignore. WC: 3.9k Warnings: MDNI. Explicit language. Underage drinking. Implied and assumed fatphobia. Descriptions of anxiety and emotional overwhelm. Lots of angst. I know, it's torture. I know this is a tad shorter of a chapter, but the end felt like a good place to separate it from the next chapter, which will be bigger and longer. Might even be the chapter we've all been waiting for, perhaps? And we've gotta have a bit more angst before we get there! Series taglist: @eddie-is-a-god @siriusmaraudeers @amandahobblepot @littlexdeaths
Thursday, January 16th, 1986
You study yourself in the mirror, contemplating your concert outfit with a level of uncertainty. You’ve decided to go bold, show a little more skin than usual. It is a rock concert, after all.
Scandalously high-cut black shorts, fishnet tights, combat boots, a WASP shirt cut into a tank top, and your newly patched jean jacket to keep you warm from the winter air outside. Hair big, curled, and teased. Face fully beat.
You look damn good, and you know it. You feel confident too as you look at yourself from different angles in the mirror. There’s no doubt you’ll be turning heads tonight, whether it’s from a place of judgment or lust.
For Eddie, it’s the latter. From the second you step out of the trailer, his eyes nearly bulge out of his head as they take you in. He quickly picks his jaw off the ground, clearing his throat as you near before you can notice the way he’s ogling you. He can’t erase the heat that’s gone right to his cheeks, however. At least he can blame the harsh winter air on that.
“You look… stunning, sweetheart.” He throws on his usual boyish smile, hoping it’s enough to hide his true reaction. You return the compliment with a shy smile, looking down at your outfit.
“You think so? You don’t think it’s too much or… too little?”
“No no no, you uh, it’s perfect. Trust me.” His reassuring smile calms your hesitation as you quickly follow him to the passenger side of the van.
He holds the door open for you as usual, cursing himself and whatever cruel god there is when his eyes catch sight of your ass as you climb in. He huffs in frustration as he rounds the van to the driver's seat, wondering how the hell he’s going to keep it together tonight with you looking like this. He knows one thing for sure, it’s going to be a long one.
You spend the drive to Indianapolis blasting your WASP tapes, hyping yourselves up for the show. Big grins as you sing and bang your heads together to the beat. Excitedly sharing what songs you hope the bands play as the mile markers on the highway fly by. Before long, you see exit signs for downtown Indianapolis.
From the passenger seat, you let your eyes roam along the buildings littering the city, people walking along the sidewalks. Spotting the concert goers within them walking toward the arena. Friends, couples, strangers. You wonder what their lives are like, thousands of different people converging in one spot for the same purpose.
The van comes to a halt amongst a sea of cars outside the arena, bright lights shooting off the building and illuminating the parking lot. You and Eddie practically skip the distance from the van to the line outside the doors. After a short wait, you’re inside and amongst crowded halls of people roaming the arena. The merch table catches your eye, you pat Eddie on the shoulder.
“Wanna get some merch before the show starts?” He gives you a wary look as he sees the line for the table. “We’ve got time, plus once we get out there you’re not gonna want to leave the floor.”
You know him too well. He finally nods and you’re off.
You both look over the plethora of different tour shirts for WASP and KISS, contemplating which ones you wanna get. When it’s finally your turn, you pick out your shirts. Before Eddie can fish for his wallet, you quickly pull out yours and hand the attendant the cash.
“Uh, wha- Hey, I can pay for that”
You give him a soft smile as you pass his new WASP shirt to him.
“Your birthday is next week, Eds. Consider it an early birthday gift.”
“You’re too good to me, sweetheart.” He throws his arm around your shoulder, leading you away from the merch table and back into the crowd.
As you walk through the crowded halls and wait at the bar for drinks with Eddie’s arm draped over you, your wandering eyes catch onto ones staring at you in judgment. Normally, you’d be unfazed, it’s far from the first time strangers have stared at you in a less than friendly way. But as you meet the eyes of multiple girls, pretty and skinny, you can’t help but feel like they’re not just judging you, they’re judging you standing next to the smokeshow that is Eddie with his arm around you. Assuming you’re with him. Wondering why the hell he’d be with a girl like you.
It’s no surprise to you that outside of the small town of Hawkins, Eddie would be seen for the attractive guy he is, especially within the scene. That notion is not extended to you however, plus-size body not fully accepted even within the confines of a crowd of outcasts by society’s standards.
When Eddie hands you a cup of beer, you quickly begin taking sips. Hoping the alcohol will calm your anxieties as you move your way back through the crowds, making an effort to not meet the eyes of anyone but Eddie’s.
As you make your way onto the floor, Eddie quickly takes your hand in his. Leading and weaving his way through the crowd with you in tow, falling in close step behind him through the hundreds of warm bodies already filling the floor ahead of the show’s opener. The crowd is overwhelming enough to your senses that you don’t think much of your hand in his, a typical action friends take together at concerts, after all. When he finds a spot close enough for you to see with enough space to move, he pulls you up next to him.
Shoulder to shoulder, sipping on your beers as you listen to the soundcheck. Anticipation fills your bodies until the sound of chatter from the surrounding crowd silences at the first note of the first song of the night from WASP, quickly turning into a loud cheer that you and Eddie join in on. You’re quickly immersed and pulled in as the bass and drums reverberate through the air and into your body. The colorful flashing lights, leather clad band members in ass-less chaps and high heels. The show, alcohol, and Eddie’s loud singing next to you fully flushing out any anxiety and worry from your mind. You’re fully living in the moment; jumping, headbanging and singing your favorite WASP songs together.
When you look next to you and see Eddie smiling wide as he shouts the lyrics, you’re filled with an indescribable feeling.
Satisfaction, fulfillment, happiness.
Knowing you were able to give Eddie this opportunity to see one of his favorite bands and seeing the joy it’s bringing him.
Love.
His gleaming eyes turn to meet yours in excitement, pulling you back into the moment with him as the last song of the set begins. Screaming at the top of your lungs when the band finishes, wishing the crowd a farewell before the roadies take over to change the stage over for KISS.
You take deep breaths with Eddie as the energy fades.
“That… was metal.” he exhales, ending with an excited giggle as you bump your shoulder into his. Sweat making your bangs cling to your foreheads. You slide off your jacket, wrapping it around your waist to help you cool down before KISS’s set begins, the first time either of you have ever seen their show.
They open with Detroit Rock City, immediately lighting up the crowd. You and Eddie bob your heads around, laughing as you dance around each other, singing along to every word. You feel so light in this moment with him, so carefree.
You make me feel like I am fun again.
Neither of you know every song in the setlist, but you dance around and headbang to them like you do. Just fully enjoying the experience.
At one point, you feel Eddie’s skin on yours. You look down to see his hand around yours, fingers entwining.
They fit so perfectly together.
The simple action with the high tempo of the music quickens your heart rate. He’s not even looking at you, his eyes glued to the band performing on stage, his hands sliding between yours so naturally, as if it’s second nature to him despite never doing it before. You inhale deeply through your nose, attempting to catch your breath and calm your heart, hoping he doesn’t look at you and notice how frazzled his touch has made you.
As soon as his hands parts from yours to clap at the end of the song, your heart craves his touch again. It’s a craving so fierce, so overwhelming you don’t know what to do with it.
A craving that’s quickly subsided when his hand moves to your bare shoulder, pulling you flush against him as he leans his lips to your ear.
“You’re my best girl, you know that? Thank you for this.”
You don’t know if it’s the little bit of alcohol in his system, the immersive energy of the show making him delirious, but you don’t think he realizes the gravity of his words as his hot breath fans over your ear, sending goosebumps all over your body. You close your eyes as your chest flutters, collecting yourself before you smile up at him.
“Anything for you, Eds.”
His words and the lingering sensation from his touch on your skin stay present in the back of your mind for the rest of the show that passes by too fast.
Before you know it, KISS plays their last encore song of the night before the lights on the stage darken, and bright lights illuminate the floor. Sticky with sweat, Eddie takes your hand in his again as you fight the crowd out of the exits. Groaning at the relief of the cold January air on your hot skin as you break from the crowd and into the outside parking lot.
You share your favorite moments on the drive home, reliving the excitement of the night as his WASP tape plays quietly in the background. The overwhelming energy of the night begins to take its toll on you as heaviness takes over your body, lazily watching the mile markers on the highway countdown your way back home.
The roar of the van quiets as Eddie parks in Wayne’s driveway. You turn to each other with a soft smile before you groan with a stretch, pulling a soft laugh from him. He walks you the short distance to your front porch steps. When you turn to face him again, he’s smiling down at you before his arms quickly wrap you up. Your head rests against his chest, the calming sound of his heartbeat against your ear. Everything about him is so addicting, intoxicating. It makes having to part from him and his embrace that much harder.
“Thank you, again.” he whispers.
Your eyes meet one another as you part, his fingertips lingering on your arms as you smile at each other.
“You’re welcome, Eds. I’m glad you had a good time.”
You stay like that for a moment, not speaking a word but so much conveyed in your eyes nonetheless.
This is my moment.
He considers taking his chance as he looks at you. Doing what he’s wanted to do for so long, just kissing you here and now. Before he can muster up the courage, you sigh softly.
“Guess I’ll see you bright and early tomorrow for school?” you mutter, already dreading the sound of your alarm clock in the morning.
His gaze breaks away from yours for a brief moment as he nods, muttering a “See you tomorrow” before watching you walk up your steps and into the trailer. Mentally kicking himself for letting the moment pass and not taking his chance. Everything in his body pushing him to do it, only to chicken out again.
His hands find their place in his jean pockets as he crosses the street, kicking spare rocks in his slow stride.
You hang your head as the water pours over you, seeping into your hair and soaking your body. Relishing in the relaxing sensation of the warm water beating against your tired body, washing away the hairspray and sweat from the night. In the quiet isolation of the shower, your mind replays the events of the night, lingering on the moments of newfound intimacy Eddie showed you.
Eddie’s always been one to push boundaries in good fun, always quick to wrap you in a hug to show his affection or when you’re feeling down.
Tonight was different. It seems like he was touching you more than he wasn’t, a hand lingering on your shoulder or waist, fingers entwining around yours… that one was new.
You convince yourself he was just caught up in the moment, being a protective best friend in a big, rowdy crowd. Grateful for the experience you’ve given him.
But the thought only makes you feel worse, putting a tightening grip on your heart.
His words.
You’re my best girl.
He has no idea the effects those few words would have on you. Stinging your eyes at what could be, what is, and what never will be.
The mental fight you’re having with yourself adds a heaviness to your chest and a building pressure in your head.
You lay your head against the shower wall as your mind rapid fire relives the moments with Eddie tonight, the last 4 months, the past years. You feel yourself begin to crack. Feelings and memories flooding your system. All the emotions you’ve bottled up the last few months building enough pressure to blow the lid off, everything you’ve held in spilling out of your eyes. Your tears mix in with the shower water as they stream down your cheeks.
As much as you want to fight it, you know that’s exactly what’s led to this moment. You give in, sitting with the pain, crying all the tears you can until the water runs cold.
As you crawl into bed for the night, you hope it was enough to be able to move on tomorrow as if nothing happened. Closing your puffy eyes and letting exhaustion overtake you.
Friday, January 24th, 1986
Eddie’s birthday
You watch as the ice in your glass cup of Coke melts, hoping you don’t appear as bored as you feel. Wouldn’t want to put a damper on the boys’ fun, not on your boy’s special day.
Limited options in Hawkins have left you celebrating Eddie’s 20th birthday at the Hideout with Gareth, Grant, and Jeff. Fake ID’s and Eddie’s previous employment as a barback have kept the drinks coming.
It’s not the worst place, but the stuffy, stale air and faded, peeling walls leave much to be desired. You’re sure with a bit of alcohol, you wouldn’t even notice. Like Eddie and the boys, carrying the hype from tonight’s campaign to the bar with them. Lively chatter filling the space, you make a few comments here and there, but you’re not fully in it.
You hate feeling this way on Eddie’s birthday, but the drunker the boys get, the more irritated you become. You promised to be the sober driver tonight. Your history with your Dad has always made you easily frustrated around drunk people when you’re sober, but you throw on a smile for him. Refusing to bring down his celebration.
He’s leaning against the jukebox, bobbing his head to the drums as Cum On Feel the Noize by Quiet Riot begins to play. When he turns, his eyes immediately land on you. Your stomach drops as he dances over to you with a smile, already anticipating the next words out of his mouth.
“Come on, sweetheart. Get off that stool and come dance with me!” You sigh and give him an unimpressed look to which he returns with a pout, effectively making a smile tug at your lips. You roll your eyes and walk towards him.
“You’re lucky it’s your birthday” you mumble joining him as his smile beams at you. You move your body side to side, bobbing your head with him to the beat. The other boys singing along loudly to the chorus from their bar stools grab your attention, making you laugh before you start singing along too. It doesn’t take much convincing from Eddie until they’re joining you on the empty floor. Jumping around each other and singing your hearts out, no doubt looking like a bunch of fools to the handful of middle aged regulars at the bar, but none of you care.
A few rounds later when it’s clear they’ve reached their limit, you’re corralling the drunken boys out of the bar. Eddie leaning onto you with his arm around your shoulder before you load them all into his van. When you climb into the driver's seat, he adorns a shit-eating grin as he attempts to buckle his seatbelt.
“Hehe, I get to be the passenger princess tonight.”
As irritable as you feel, you can’t fight the grin from pulling at your lips before you bring the engine to life and pull out of the Hideout parking lot.
You grab your pack of cigarettes, quickly lighting one and inhaling the smoke as the sound of blabbering from the 3 boys in the back fills the van.
Ahem.
You look to your side to find Eddie giving you puppy dog eyes with an unlit cigarette dangling from his lips.
“Would you be so kind?”
“Oh, where are my manners? Anything for you, princess.” You enthuse dramatically, bringing the lighter to the end of his cigarette.
The flame illuminates his dimples and the smirk forming them. Even drunk off his ass, he’s so damn cute.
With his cigarette lit, you pull your attention elsewhere. Keeping an eye on the road while you thumb through his collection of tapes in the center console. You find the perfect one, quickly sliding the Queen tape into his radio, fast forwarding to the exact time Bohemian Rhapsody starts. Earning a chorus of “OHH”s at the easily recognizable piano notes in the intro. The five of you sing at the top of your lungs as you barrel down the nearly empty Hawkins streets. Laughing until your stomach hurts at the boys’ best attempts to hit the high notes.
After dropping off Garth, Jeff, and Grant, you find yourself pulling into Eddie’s driveway.
“Well, I’ve got one last thing for you, birthday boy.”
Though already nearly nodding off, he gives you a lazy smile with raised brows. You get out of the van and hurry to the other side to keep Eddie from stumbling up the stairs to the trailer, hand keeping a tight hold on your plush waist. You bring him to lean against the kitchen counter before moving to the oven that hid the cake you’d made earlier while Eddie got ready for Hellfire. You light the candles as quickly as you can before slowly turning to reveal it to him. His eyes widen, a one-sided smile on his lips as you bring the cake to rest on the counter in front of him, singing Happy Birthday. His eyes glance between the cake and you as you sing, warmth filling his gaze and his cheeks.
It takes him a few tries, but he blows out all the candles before he looks to you again.
“Happy birthday, Eddie” you give him a soft smile before he pulls you in for a tight hug.
“Thank you, sweetheart. For everything” he mutters into your hair, arms wrapped tight around your waist. You expect it to be brief, but his hold doesn’t budge.
“No need to thank me, Eds”
He’s drunk, so you let him hold you longer without thinking much of it.
“I love you so much” he whispers, voice deep and sincere. The alcohol causes his body to sway side to side, his grip on you pulling your body with him.
His words shoot right through your heart, and you’re thankful for his hold on you, keeping your face out of view as you squeeze your eyes shut.
Not the way I love you.
You take a deep breath, settling your nerves and voice before you return his words.
“I love you too”
You let him hold you for a few seconds longer before it becomes too much to bear.
“Come on, have some of your cake” you pat his back, pulling his attention back to the cake sitting on the counter. His grip on you loosens as he turns back to it with a drunken smile.
You grab a knife, fork and a paper plate, cutting him a slice. He wastes no time digging in, leaving remnants of chocolate icing covering his lips.
“Mmm, you’re such a good baker” he groans, closing his eyes and reveling in the taste. Normally, you’d smile at the compliment, but you can’t bring yourself to as you watch him.
“Hey… you’re not gonna have some?” He asks when his eyes open and he comes back to his senses through the alcohol.
“No, trying to cut back on sweets. It’s your cake, anyway.”
“Bulllllshiiit. You’re perfect the way you are” he insists, slurring his words with unchewed cake in his mouth. The counter he leans on being the only thing keeping him upright.
“Thanks, Eds… but really, I’m fine.” You give him a muted smile. It’s enough in his drunken state for him to shrug in response, quickly diving back in to finish the last few bites.
“Alright, I think it’s time we get you to bed. Come on.”
He doesn’t argue with you, only wrapping his arm around your shoulder again as you lead him down the hallway to his bedroom.
You flick on his light as he stumbles in, fighting to pull off his vest and leather jacket. You begin to move to help get him into bed but he doesn’t stop there. Pulling his Hellfire shirt over his head and throwing it across the room carelessly. Revealing his bare chest, a tattoo you’ve never seen decorating his left pec.
When his hands fumble with his belt, you quickly look away, trying to distract yourself with the posters on his wall as you feel warmth creep up your chest and into your cheeks.
When you hear him groan and his feet shuffling against the carpet, you take a chance in looking back at him. With barely open eyelids and sporting only his blue checkered boxers, he falls onto his bed with a huff. You pull his covers over him, huffing a sigh as you look over his probably already sleeping figure.
“Goodnight, Eddie.”
When you’re met with silence, you flick his lights off and spare one last glance at him before leaving and shutting his bedroom door behind you.
You quickly cover his cake and grab your purse before making your way across the street to your trailer.
Heaviness hanging in your chest. It’s a far from unfamiliar sensation at this point. It’s the same heaviness that hasn’t left since the concert a week ago, now only intensified tonight with his drunken words and embrace.
Freshly changed into your pajamas, you spare a glance out your bedroom window to the trailer across the street. Only one thought lingering in your mind.
I don’t know how much more of this I can take.
#eddie munson fic#eddie munson x plus size reader#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x plussize!reader#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson x you#bestfriend!eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson#eddie munson angst#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson fem reader#one step away from you
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