#brownies are healthier then other stuff
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could i get your take on what the companions (or just my favorite boy X6's) top 10 fave candies/foods would be in a modern AU?
anon you are in luck, because I am constantly thinking about the diets and eating habits of my blorbos
The numbered list isn't in any particular order, it's just so I don't have to manually count each point
so
What the companions would eat if not in a post apocalypse
Cait; Wouldn't have a taste for fancier cuisine. Eats more...hick-ish. I can say that because I was a hick with this kind of diet, growing up. Has a taste for filling, cheap, low-effort food...think lots of fast food, but "healthier" fast food. Like Chipotle, Panera, etc. Can cook, doesn't often, but will if she has a craving. Savory or tart tastes. She tends to eat lighter than you'd expect.
Blueberry brownie anything, favors dark chocolate in general
Submarine sandwiches, anything with pickles
Key lime pie
Salt and vinegar chips and thinks critics of such chips are cowards
Peach Redbull, any energy drinks though
Storebought hummus and Doritos, has been seen eating hummus with just a spoon though
Blueberry bread pudding. Simple to make, fun to eat, very comforting. Buys her bread already stale from a local bakery, has a guy to hook her up with the old shit
Seafood chowder
Sausages in any capacity. Jerky sticks, breakfast sausage, etc. Loves chorizo.
Honey buns from the gas station
Curie; Health nut, she eats like every influencer claims they eat like. Only, Curie actually eats like that. Lots of fresh foods and whole grains, little red meat. However, Curie makes a point to have foods that other health nuts would condemn, thinks its really important to not label any food as "bad." So, she balances between health nut and normal person. Her taste leans toward bright and/or sweet. Dislikes red meat.
Salmon breakfast wraps
Tropical fruit smoothies, eats so much pineapple
Iced tea, favors raspberry. Never seen without an iced tea of some kind
Halibut tacos, likes red cabbage and a fuck ton of lemon on it. Soft shells all the way
Bananas foster
Whipped brie dip, eats it with anything but loves it on apples, basically dessert
Lemon pepper grilled chicken and rice
So many salads, loves that you can just throw shit in a bowl and call it a recipe. Likes strawberries and almonds
Lemon poppyseed muffins
Shrimp and bitter melon stir fry
Danse; mixed bag. One on hand, small town diner tastes. Simple, cheap, good ol' American food. On the other, he's doomed to be a soldier in every universe he's in, so...maybe he picks up some tastes and dishes from places he's toured. Gets a weird pallate that shoots in all directions and makes you wonder what it's like in that thick skull. One day he's a good American boy with pancakes and steak, the next he's eating cake mix dry and drinking tahini from a flask.
Anything BBQ, but a pulled pork devotee
Hot coffee so heavily creamed and sugars it looks like milk. He likes the twix combo of chocolate, shortbread, and caramel flavors
Prepackaged baked goods a la Hostess, fucks up little Debbie oatmeal cookies
Apple and pecan pie
Menemen—Turkish dish, scrambled eggs with tomatoes, bell peppers, spices to taste, and (controversially) onions. Adds sausage and cheese, eats it with a fork or spoon (its meant to be eaten with bread)
Khachapuri—Georgian cheesy bread with egg. Eats with a knife and fork. (its meant to be eaten with the bread crust)
Smores pop tarts
Beef and potato stew
Rice bowl with fried egg and avocado, bonus points if it has bacon
Straight cookie dough/brownie/cake batter, usually when he's black out drunk and cannot shame himself out of eating raw egg products.
Deacon; Very childhood comfort food. Y'know, things you had as a kid, but probably grew out of a bit? Eats out of gas stations/takeout frequently. Very open flavor pallete, has tried everything he's had the chance to. Likes one-handed food, stuff you can have the other hand free for. Doesn’t really have a 'theme', has broad horizons for his diet. Likes lighter, mild flavors, though. He eats lightly and on the go a lot.
Hot/corn dogs, taste in hot dog toppings varies
Egg salad sandwiches
French fries and vanilla ice cream, classic combo
Mango sticky rice
Cornbread with any accompaniments. Likes honey or chili, thinks if you have a drink with cornbread, you ain't a real cornhead
Penne alla vodka
Cucumber salad. This could mean a salad with cucumbers, that trending Asian recipe where you cut the cumber so its springy, or eating a cucumber like a hotdog.
Fried mushrooms
Usually just drinks water but will have gator/powerade when he's working. Likes purple flavor
Captain crunch cereal, loves all cereal though. Prefers the kibble stuff to the berries. Starts philosophical debates about the morality of Trix commercials vs Lucky Charms commercials
Gage; His favorite foods reflect his upbringing. Coastal swamp cuisine, cheap and made in bulk. Take Danse's pallate and hyperlocalize it, and then lower the budget by a good amount. Things he grew up eating. Would gradually replace his favorites with pricier, 'less embarrassing' dishes, distances himself from his origins. However, takes care to not looked too loaded. Smokey and savory flavors are his thing, likes more spice than people expect.
Doberge cake, which is layered with pudding, often half-chocolate and half-lemon
Red beans and rice, with stewed pork if they could afford it
Blackened fish of any kind, liked it with cilantro-lime rice
Steak with potatoes and/or eggs
Chronic iced tea drinker like Curie, though he prefers the bitter kinds
Scallops
Brussels sprouts defender and will fight for their honor
Peaches
Was introduced to curry during a business meeting/outing. Could drink that shit from a glass, has it with potatoes and porkchops.
Lobster anything. This is one of those 'less embarresing' things, but he genuinely enjoys a good lobster roll. Even if he prefers a freshly-caught lobster bisque. Again, something he had growing up, something he pushes away.
Hancock; Similar to Deacon, but favors fatty, greasy food. No, it's not the drugs, that's just his metabolism. He's a skinny twink, always starving, can never put on weight. Eats as much as Danse, who is a big guy and needs more calories than most. He's really into street food and foreign dishes, won't eat at a restaurant if they speak fluent English or have good customer service. IYKYK. Very comfort food heavy, lots of "this would slap with Netflix at 2 am"
A classic oxtail, mac and cheese, and collard green take out combo
Any and all American-chinese take out, usually gets eggplant tofu with chow mein and cream cheese rangoons
"Walking tacos", those things where you open a small bag of chips and dump White People taco makings in. Probably just tips the whole thing into his mouth
Yakitori, Japanese chicken skewers, popular bar food
Bloody Mary cocktails
Pizza, will fight for the honor of pineapple. Would really be into how Brazil does pizza
Frozen yogurt and ice cream, piles with toppings
Breakfast sandwiches or wraps. Egg, meat, cheese, doesn't matter the time nor specifics.
Jam donuts, loves cherry fillings
Puppy chow/muddy buddies, chex cereal covered in chocolate and powdered sugar. Eats his weight in them if not careful
MacCready; forces himself to learn how to cook for Duncan's sake, but for himself...good God. It's horrible. Eats like garbage. Would never drink water if not to set an example. Take out, frozen food, so much candy and soda. After Duncan, broadens his horizons. Finds he really likes soups. Just throw shit in a pot and it works. Eats on a budget, so that's a life-saver. Doesn't have a preferred flavor pallete, aside from his love of candy.
Meat lover's pizza. Thinks pineapple has no place on pizza
Used to drink Mountain Dew and diet coke, replaced it with iced teas and more organic fruit juices for the sake of his teeth
Chicken soup, either from a can, or homemade. Either way, slaps. If homemade, blends veggies for a hidden veggie stock. For him, Duncan is a lot better at eating veggies, MacCready needs to trick himself.
Sour rainbow ropes
Cookie crisp cereal, thinks whoever came up with it deserved the sloppiest head. Incredible design, no notes
Cheese and sour cream chips
Famous Amos cookies
Eggo waffles
Gnocchi is God to him. Its superior to all noodles and makes your Shit In The Fridge soup 1000 times better.
Rice pudding is cheap, easy, and a surprisingly efficient sweet-tooth satisfier. Makes it with pumpkin spice mix or chocolate.
Nick; Home-cooked meals all the way. Could kill himself with cheese and die happy. Lots of easy meals and snacking so he can keep working, but will treat himself to a nice, hard-earned dinner when he has the time and energy. Likes himself the smokey, the fresh, or the sour. Probably knows all the best sub shops in the city, probably in a turf war with regulars of rival shops. Jewish delicatessens are like church to him.
Lasanga. Most of his freezer space is lasagna. Eats so much of it. He's lactose intolerant. It hurts but it hurts so good
Latkes. Fried potato things, kind of like hashbrowns, except the potato is mashed/ground instead of grated. And yes. Also pastrami. But those little potato bitches...mmmph.
Red velvet muffins with cream cheese frosting.
Fried cheese in any capacity
A prosciutto, arugula, brie, and fig sandwich
Pickled pearl onions
Cobb salad
Black coffee. Temp doesn't matter, because he's going to forget it until its room temp.
Has been known to enter fugue states and consume an absurd amount of Chicago style hot dogs
Scones or just plain bread with butter and jams
Piper; Broke college student trying to make it as a reporter. Her tastebuds are fucked, they salivate not for flavor, or texture, but for those good, good low prices. Piper's diet is almost entirely snackfood or takeout. If she ever cooks, it's for Nat. But when taking care of just herself, Piper eats from a box or bag. When she does cook, it's very simple meals. Loves her carbs and her fruit flavors
Chicken Ramen with canned chicken and frozen broccoli chucked in. Also makes this for Nat
Hot cheetos, eats with chopsticks
Spaghetti and meatballs
Fruit smoothies/smoothie bowls, blends in veggies as well for the nutrition
Coka cola and anything from Fanta, loves fruit sodas
Anything carbs and I mean that. Eats a lot of bread, pasta, cakes, potatoes...they're the sweetheart of anyone on a budget.
Buffalo cauliflower, likes it more than Buffalo chicken
Chewing gum. Fruit flavors only, hates mint gum. Likes mint elsewhere, just not in gum.
Nickle-nips and other "jelly/juice in a wax package" candies. Likes the charm of it, also, free chewing wax
Suckers/lollipops, big on hard candy in general but the stick satisfies her smoking habit.
Preston; A mix of easy depression/bulk meals and dishes from his childhood. Lots of spices, cooks with a lot of straight peppers. Tends to eat his food 'raw', not made into a dish. Again, easy and quick to eat. Also tends to buy pre-prepared stuff for the same reason, buys more fruits and veggies and just eats them straight. Doesn't care about eating healthy, he just lacks energy to cook most days.
I have no choice to explain this as it has no name. Casserole dish, layer of mashed potatoes, layer of shredded or chunked chicken, layer of white breakfast gravy or brown poultry gravy, top with drop biscuits. It's buttery, its savory, it is white as snow. Easy, cheap, one ladlefull is dinner. You'll get a few meals out of it, and it's so filling you have like, five minutes before you're stuffed. I call it gut-glue.
Dirty rice
Eggs scrambled with spinach
Jollof/jambalaya
Veggies and hummus or ranch
Various fruits and berries such as grapes, cherries, blackberries, and oranges
Shakshouka, eggs poached in spicy tomato sauce and eaten with bread
Chicken biscuits, crackers dusted with, like, chicken bouillon? They taste like a chicken Ramen packet sneezed on a ritz
Slurpees/Icees/those syruped gas station ice drinks
Straight peppers, eats bell peppers like apples. Eats pickled jalapeños and scotch bonnets to feel something. Drinks the liquid in pickle jars instead of alcohol, or mixes it with gelatin and makes pickle jello.
X6-88; Pretensious rich asshole who eats like it. He rarely cooks for himself, probably has a personal chef or something. Maybe his work has their own restaurants, like Google. Eats mostly vegetables, but his favorite foods skew from "Dubai Influencer" to "12 year old who earned too much lawn mowing money and was let loose in a convenience store." So much sugar. Willy Wonka's factory is his idea of heaven and until it exists, he's an atheist.
Raw meats. Steak and tuna tartar, sashimi, and sushi
Braised duck with cherries
Nduja, a spicy pork sausage spread, has it with flatbreads
Oysters. Eats them all fancy in public, eats them from a tin with doritos at home
Anything from Hostess, Little Debbie, those brands. Fucking anything. However, would kill a man for any kind of Swiss roll
Chocolate milk
Gummies, very picky with brands, hates the harder kinds like Haribo. Wants his gummies soft as a marshmellow
Cadbury eggs
Milano dark chocolate cookies
Gushers
#fallout 4#fo4#paladin danse#preston garvey#nick valentine#piper wright#x6-88#robert joseph maccready#companions react#porter gage
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More Alan questions (because I like him & you):
• How would he be with a partner who is yandere, like him? But like, maybe in a slightly more low-key way?
• How would he be with a partner who doesn't really put up with his yandere stuff? Like, they still want to be with him, but they confront him when he's being too yandere, and insists on working through their issues through actual communication and building trust? (Essentially, someone who's like "We're building a healthier relationship together, or we'll die trying")
• What's his favourite flavour of ice cream?
Anon ur gonna make me blushhh 🥺 :3 I'm so glad u love my bastard man 💜
Oh he would be absolutely flattered. Like you're stalking HIM? Baby he's been stalking you too! Oh my gawdddd meet cute LMAO But in all seriousness Alan really just wants someone who is devoted to him in the way he would devote himself to his partner, with their complete body and soul. So having a partner who is just as obsessed with him as he is them he'd be all head over heels. He might put a guard up for the beginning, just to make sure you aren't just into him for his money or any other nefarious reasons. He needs you IN in and once he deems you to be telling the truth he's all in.
A partner not putting up with his yandere tendencies but still wanting to be with him would be interesting to say the least. On one hand, you've shown that you love him and want him, but on the other hand he HAS to be in control. If he can't be in control of the situation or not know where you are or put such an intense level of trust that he's not there with yet, he's going to have a bad time. He would certainly try, don't get me wrong. But I think unless he's got some sort of leg up or a way to protect himself if things go wrong and you reject him or he finds out something about you that would hurt him, he would be fixated day and night and not be able to do anything unless he knew what was going on. It's a huge problem for him because trust is something he has had shattered by everyone in his life at least once. I feel like unless you're understanding with some level of surveillance which would then be lessened over time the more he trusts you, or completely aren't into voyeurism/exhibitionism it really won't work out with him. Especially cause this man essentially craves control both in and out if the bedroom. If things don't end amicably then weeeeeeellllll ya know how things tend to go on that front lol
I fucking LOVE the whiplash I got between the last two questions and this one LOL So I imagine Alan as a man with many tastes. He's got a secret sweet tooth that is hard to get a handle on if you aren't careful, especially if you love to bake. He loves many different flavors of ice cream but I think he would always trend towards something with chocolate. Any time he is offered a choice for chocolate he will go for it nine times out of ten. A simple soft serve swirl, chocolate fudge ripples, chocolate pieces like are in Panda Paws ice cream, brownie bits, hell get some caramel or peanut butter in on the mix and he's happy. If there's a chocolate cherry mix he would go for that too. Maybe try to make sure he doesn't overload on sugar because he will act like a kid in the candy store and get a huge stomach ache because he can't stop lmao
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I was tagged by @camoooh. Thank youu
1. If you were to attend a costume party tonight, what or whom would you go as?
I wouldn't go to a party lmao
2. What are your choice of toppings on a hamburger? And do you prefer gas or charcoal grilling?
Anything and everything. All the vegetables all the meat all the sauce. Of course they need to work together but I'm not picky. I don't mind some charcoal grilling
3. You are chosen to have lunch with the President. The condition is you only get to ask one question. What do you ask?
President of what?
4. It’s your first day of vacation, what are you doing?
Photography, walking around, sightseeing, eating, reading, editing photos, spending 4 hours in the hotel bathtub, fangirling over breakfast buffet
5. What is your concession stand must-have at the movies?
I like movie nachos. I do not like spending a fortune on them though. I'm definitely sneaking in my own stuff.
6. Which do you dislike most: pop-up ads or spam email?
POP-UP ADS
7. What do you think Captain Hook’s name was before he had a hook for a hand?
Captain hand
8. Rock, paper, or scissors?
Paper
9. How long was it from ‘the first date’ until the proposal of marriage? How long until the wedding?
No wedding now proposal no dating
10. Which is worse, being in a place that is too loud, or too quiet?
Too loud usually
11. What is one quality that you really appreciate in a person?
Thoughtfulness?
12. At the good old general store, what particular kind of candy would you expect to be in the big jar at the counter?
....what •-•
13. What is the most distinguishing landmark in your city?
The castle?
14. Everyone hears discussions that they consider boring. What topic can put you to sleep quicker than any other?
Politics. Pop music (depending). Sports
15. How many times did it take you to pass your drivers test?
Did everything on the first truy
16. If you had to have the same topping on your vanilla ice cream for the rest of your life, what topping would you choose?
I bet brownies would slap
17. What food item would need to be removed from the market altogether in order for you to live a healthier, longer life?
Chocolate and ice cream :/
18. You are offered an envelope that you know contains $50. You are then told that you may either keep it or exchange it for another envelope that may contain $500 or may be empty. Do you keep the first envelope, or do you take your chances with the second?
The logical part of my brain says exchange it
19. If you had to choose, which would you give up: TV, or internet?
TV, I don't use it anyways
20. Who is your dream girl or boy from movies/tv?
I have noo idea. Every character I really like is a killer or something.
21. Have you ever met a celebrity?
No. (I'd consider my favorite band celebrities tho :))
22. What kind of lunch box did you have as a kid?
The non-existent kind
I tag @l-o-s-t--hope @pardonthegeriatricinthepit @obsess-d @bl33ditout @bdailorsimpofficial @coping-via-clint-eastwood and anyone else who wants to join!
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Food cravings - gone? 🍔🍕🍟🍪🍫🧁
So ever since I've been taking my multivitamins and magnesium. I've been getting little food cravings. Of course, I'll get occasional eating-out urges and I'll have a diet Coke and some chocolate (I had some chocolate cake last week for my brother's birthday from Whole Foods and they have really good chocolate cake). But these cravings don't come as much as they used to.
I wish I kept track of how I ate in previous months. I just know that I did enjoy sugary stuff. And there are 2 reasons for that - nutritional deficiencies and suppressive eating (you'll crash eventually regardless of how "disciplined" you are).
I would drink sugary coffee (from the cafe I like going to), eat cookies (Crumbl and pumpkin chocolate chip oatmeal), chocolate bars (from Whole Foods), etc. I would eat chips and Chick-fil-a pretty often. Keep in mind that I do enjoy these stuff, just not as much as before. I think this all started in April when one Friday I got some coffee from the cafe I used to go to every week, and it just tasted too sweet. Also, on the 21st I went to Starbucks and got a mocha and a warm brownie. I got the same thing once when I was eating restrictively and felt like I was in heaven. On the 21st, I just did not enjoy it that much (even though I do love coffee and chocolate). My vitamins are likely responsible for this.
For dinner today, I ordered some fresh soft tacos from a local Mexican restaurant with chicken, avocado, sour cream, jalapenos, cilantro, and other veggies. I don't like beans nor rice so I did not get those. While I did eat out, I did get something relatively healthy (rather than Chick-fil-a or frozen pizza, though in theory, you can make pizza healthy). I had healthy carbs from the whole wheat tortilla, white chicken as protein, veggies, and healthy fats (avocado). The place was actually good and I can see myself getting this for lunch every now and then. Eating out is fine, it helps to find places that offer healthy options too.
Sometimes I will get some cravings at work, but that's simply because I am hungry. It's a similar idea of getting groceries on an empty stomach because chances are, you'll get the tempting stuff such as chips, candy bars, baked goods, crackers, etc... I'll go home and eat normally and the cravings go away.
Recently I have not had the healthiest relationship with food. I have restrictved. inthe past, but I felt there were moments where I was eating healthier. But that moreso came from a perspective of fear and restriction as opposed to actually craving healthy stuff. I also had a lot of protein bars, protein powder, sugar free garbage, etc... So I wasn't necessarily healthy in that aspect (I believe in eating the real deal instead of substitutes). And yes I was pretty slim. But that came from fear and restriction.
I want to continue taking my multivitamins and magnesium supplements and hope I can continue this habit of eating healthy and well. Because cravings suck. I want to be healthy and I don't want to have doctors boss me around since they treat allopathically and know little about nutrition (sad truth most people won't admit) and just prescribe medication and treatments that temporarily treat symptoms rather than finding ways to heal the body within. So I want to continue my healthy eating habits and eliminate/reduce my cravings for junk and sugar. I want this to be something long-term (I'm talking years/decades) but it's so hard to project this since I just started having this feeling for about a month. But I want to live a healthy life and I know the dangers of eating a ton of sugar and processed foods. Of course, I want to enjoy life and live a little, but I want to stay healthy.
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*cracks knuckles* (farmer june got a sliiiight rebrand so kids lets all say hello farmer celeste) lets do this
Does your farmer like mint chocolate ice cream? Does it taste like toothpaste? Are they neutral, or do they hate it?
Celeste cooks a lot to save money and because of this, they have a wealthy knowledge of cooking. So.... no, it does not taste like toothpaste to them. They are adamant that:
"actually peppermint and mint are very different in taste due to the menthol content present in each plant so while peppermint has 40% mint has such a small amount that–"
they arent a big fan of mint chocolate chip ice cream but they certainly arent going to turn their nose up at it. i think they'd play up their like of it to mess with others, though
During the summer does your farmer visit Alex’s ice cream stand? What flavor/treat do they buy? What’s their least favorite flavor?
Celeste likes ice cream, but never buys it because... look. Its hot and they're running around 24/7, add dairy to that and they're gonna throw up. they'll take a popsicle instead. if they did get ice cream, though, their favorite flavor is turtle (aka chocolate caramel and pecan) and their least favorite is chocolate!
What is one treat your farmer will ALWAYS have in their home? Is it healthy or unhealthy?
Celeste doesnt keep treats in their home per say, but definitely keeps a variety of ingredients on hand that allow them to make their favorite treats! Their favorite would for sure be a hot brownie with a scoop of plain vanilla ice cream on top, so slightly healthier by the virtue of being homemade, but not by much!
If your farmer was a snack item what would they be?
Honey bun! their sweet exterior is appealing to many, but they worry they'll disappoint others if they're more honest about what's going on beyond that. its not for everyone, but those who like honey buns are very ride or die. i think the same could be said for farmer celeste
What’s your farmer’s comfort food, favorite meal, and least favorite meal?
oooo this is a hard one. i think Celeste would seek comfort in extremely nostalgic meals. i think the grampleton area, where they're from, is a big lumber town (based on canon dialogue) and that the area is similar to the southern US (the biggest lumber-producing states in the US are mostly southern states) so they're super nostalgic for stuff like cornbread, catfish, chicken and dumplings, etc.
their favorite meal is probably something comforting, but not necessarily a comfort food. a meal that has good memories tied to it or a really tasty pastry or something, so their favorite meal would be a hot soup, like potato soup!
i dont think they have a least favorite meal? maybe something they just personally find bland or boring, like plain rice or something. also mushrooms. mushroom haters
What’s something they will NEVER eat?
snails. it just seems like it'll be a gross, slimy experience and snails are so cute!! celeste is borderline vegetarian and rarely partakes in any meat (like yeah in a small community like pelican town you know the animals are being treated will, but,,,, look at their cute faces,,,,,,,)
What do they cook if they know they will have a guest over?
Celeste is a massive people pleaser. everyone needs to like them and they're stubborn to a fault. they'll extensively plan to make something to their guests' taste if they know who's coming over. For example, if harvey comes over, they'll make a mushroom risotto. shane? homemade pizza. emily? veggie burgers. the list goes on. cater to your guest babey
If the town’s potluck didn’t matter so much, what ingredient would they take? And what food would they put at an event table if you had to bring something?
potato! potato is a good ingredient in anything and its so versatile that its hard to fuck up just with adding potatoes. Celeste would bring sweets to an event, like pie or cookies! sweet tooth ass
Finally, if your farmer was real, what would YOU give them to eat.
therapy
kidding, kidding, i'd give them soup. irl, i have too much soup that i froze and idk what to do with it. they can take some off my hands
Helloooo farmer friends!! So last night my friend @pavusprince mentioned how she doesn’t understand the toothpaste mint chocolate chip ice cream comparison and that got me thinking!! Let’s talk about food!!
Does your farmer like mint chocolate ice cream? Does it taste like toothpaste? Are they neutral, or do they hate it?
During the summer does your farmer visit Alex’s ice cream stand? What flavor/treat do they buy? What’s their least favorite flavor?
What is one treat your farmer will ALWAYS have in their home? Is it healthy or unhealthy?
If your farmer was a snack item what would they be? (It cannot be a food that could be eaten like a meal, but it may be a dessert) Here’s some examples: chips, cookies, M&ms, Twinkies, crackers, bubblegum, lollipops, etc
What’s your farmer’s comfort food, favorite meal, and least favorite meal?
What’s something they will NEVER eat?
What do they cook if they know they will have a guest over?
If the town’s potluck didn’t matter so much, what ingredient would they take? And what food would they put at an event table if you had to bring something?
Finally, if your farmer was real, what would YOU give them to eat.
#farmer celeste#farmer asks#once again meli comes in with the farmer asks and i get to think about how celeste behaves like im observing a little creature in its cage
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So, I’m definitely writing a headcanon Security Breach runthrough fic...sooner or later. But, for now, here’s some stuff I planned.
Security Girl: Vanessa Alessia Pines
Gregory: Gregory Michael Pines
Due to parents’ divorcing, neither want to take Gregory.
Lilo and Nani-type shenanigans between these two.
Vanessa stress bakes and eats brownies. She craves stress brownies the entire time.
‘It’s summer break for him and Gregory really wants to see how the night shift is. Seems reasonable.’
Definitely a creepy moment in the VR-space where Glitchtrap is talking and Vanny’s sitting there, completely enthralled.
Mr. Moon and Mrs. Sun being terrifying.
Vanessa and Gregory get separated when he leaves to go to the bathroom.
Vanessa and Gregory both trying to sneak past the Vanny-controlled animatronics to find each other.
Vanguard with a homoerotic fist-and-knife fight and Vanny calling Vanessa ‘honey bear.’
Glitchtrap musing on the similarities he sees between Vanessa and Michael.
Glamrock Freddy being a dad.
“Gregory, be still. ...I think she found us.”
Freddy mistaking Vanessa for Vanny and nearly killing her before she and Gregory recognize each other.
“I’m fine, Gregory.” “Don’t lie, Nessa. Lying’s bad.” “...yes. Yes it is. How’s your cut?” “I’m fine, don’t worry about me.”
Vanessa and Freddy having an older sibling relationship.
Another moment: Gregory is getting freed from Freddy’s chest cavity when he falls out and Vanessa tries to catch him, only for both to end up on the floor. Freddy’s worried before the two of them just break into laughter.
Vanny gets hit with a microphone stand twice.
Once by Freddy, the other by Vanessa.
#fnaf security breach#security girl#glamrock freddy#vanny#gregory#fnaf#brownies are healthier then other stuff#vanguard
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(5/12) “Camila had started kindergarten by this time. I was trying to pack her lunchbox with healthy choices, but the grocery aisles were filled with crap: potato chips, sugar, processed stuff. I’d been reading about the dangers of the modern diet. I knew her body couldn’t handle those things, so I decided to cook everything myself. But only with real ingredients: no boxes or bags, no sugar, no dairy. And everything was organic. Sebas thought I was a crazy woman. He kept complaining that our grocery bills were too expensive. But something began to happen. The girls were using less pills, and fewer inhalers. There were no more 2 AM trips to the hospital. And when we sat down with the bills at the end of the month, it was clear as day. Yes, our grocery bills were going up. But the medical bills were going down even faster. I waved the papers at Sebastian. ‘Look at this!’ I told him. ‘I’m not crazy!’ But after that I did become a little crazy. Because I started to love the kitchen. I researched all the latest nutrition. Then I’d lie awake at night imagining healthy meals for my girls: black bean brownies, zucchini smoothies, mango and coconut cookies. And my dishes were more than just healthy, they were delicious. Sometimes Camila would share her lunch with friends, and I began to get calls from other moms. ‘How do you do it?’’ they’d ask. ‘My daughter hates zucchini. But she loves your zucchini muffins!’ I shared some of my recipes online, and there was so much interest that I began teaching classes at our home. Each morning a group of moms would gather in my kitchen, we’d cook recipes together, then afterwards we’d eat a big breakfast. Those were such happy years. I’d discovered a new passion. The girls were getting healthier. We added a third daughter to our family. Then a fourth. I loved being a mom so much. There was nothing I enjoyed more than spending time with my girls: being with them, helping them grow. That’s all I needed in life. But shortly after our fifth and final daughter was born, Sebastian pulled me aside one day. ‘Maybe you could turn your food into a business,’ he said. ‘Because it’s always nice to have a back-up.’”
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Consider this scenario:
A little boy doesn't want his boxed lunch. "Why can't I have the pizza at the school lunch? All the other kids get it! It looks so good!"
(You know better. It looks good but school pizza is awful.)
"How about this," you say, "Try this cosmic brownie. If you like it, I'll give it to you ever day in your lunch box."
The boy's eyes widen and he snatches it up, look at the colorful sprinkles! He loves them, and decides to accept his lunch box. Now, for the first few days, he eagerly eats the brownie first and picks around the gross healthier stuff. Carrots? Yuck! But maybe he'll have a bite of the granola bar, the one with the chocolate. Eventually though, he grows up enough to eat his whole lunch, and maybe even save the brownie for last.
Fast forward, this boy is a successful business man! He's preparing for a meeting, and his wife made him a wonderful home made lunch full of healthy stuff. He eats it eagerly, but what's this at the bottom? A cosmic brownie! Of course he eats that too, the cherry on top.
This is what Christian pop/radio music is for. It's for people on the verge of understanding, flipping through the radio, hearing something that sounds similar to their music taste but wait-- it's about God?
Is it healthy to survive on? No, of course not! But if someone becomes comfortable with it, they start reaching for more solid spiritual food, and they go further and further until they're solid, meat heating Christians. But I've never known anyone to deny the occasional cosmic brownie!
Christian radio music is important. It serves a fantastic purpose. It's still worship too, because the people who put their heart into making it are serving God. And it's alright for a seasoned Christian to indulge in too, as long as it's not the only thing you consume. It's great for replacing what would otherwise be secular music.
"I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for it. Indeed, you are still not ready."
1 Corinthians 3:2 NIV
#Christian#it takes faith to fly#this is a response to the take that modern christian music is ungodly
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Most to least - which of the fellows has the biggest sweettooth?
Which fellows has the biggest sweettooth -
~~~
Most:
1. Judy
2. Harry
3. Eugene
4. Ethan
5. Scarlett
6. Zion
7. Hailey
8. Jay
9. Lawrence
10. Sue
Least:
~~~
Judy & Harry: We know how sweet Judy is, so it’s no shocker that she loves any type of sweets! I feel like Harry isn’t crazy about sweets, but he will sure eat it if it’s in front of him.
Eugene & Ethan: I feel like Eugene isn’t that big on candy, but if it’s ice cream or cookies, he’ll eat that! Ethan plays baseball, so I’m sure he can’t have that much, but hey, if a brownie gets placed in front of you, you’re gonna eat it!
Scarlett & Zion: Scarlett, I feel like only likes suckers or something to suck on. So nothing soft or that will make a mess. I can only picture Zion hardly eating any sweets but popsicles.
Hailey & Jay: Hailey would only like liquid sweets, like coffee, smoothies, slushies, etc. Jay, yeah, I can only see him liking cookies.
Lawrence & Sue: Lawrence probably doesn’t like sweets and prefers to stick to other stuff. Sue, I see her liking healthier stuff and probably only touching sweets once a year.
#dangerous fellows#dangerousfellows#dangerous fellows eugene#dangerous fellows ethan#dangerous fellows harry#dangerous fellows zion#dangerous fellows lawrance#dangerous fellow jay#dangerous fellows judy#dangerous fellows scarlett#dangerous fellows hailey#dangerous fellows sue
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|| █ Personal Info █ ||
█ G e n e r a l;
Full Name: Oliver May Jones
Nickname(s)/Alias(es): Oliver, Oli
Age: 14
Species: Human
Soul Trait and Color: Green of Kindness
Birthday: May 19
Gender: Male
Preferred Pronouns: He/Him
Sexual Orientation: Bisexual (prefers girls more)
█ P e r s o n a l i t y;
Personality Traits: kind, generous, thoughtful || casual, emotional, soft || martyr, a little gullible, sometimes aggressive Likes: cooking, baking, food, his family, babysitting Dislikes: loud snoring, bullies, wars Fears: mentions of war Special/Significant Belongings: Frying pan, Comfy Apron, cookbook
█ R e l a t i o n s h i p s;
Family:
Parents/Guardians and/or Grandparents:
Along with the rest of his siblings, he was very loved and raised humbly in his home. While they were not poor per say there were times when money was hard to get. From his parents he inherited their humbleness and kindness to others and was an eager helper whenever Oliver felt his parents need it. When his father went to war he was always worried about him but his mother always comforted him and his sisters whenever they needed it.
Between his parents his mother is actually the most protective over her their children while his father is the more peace-making of the two.
Siblings:
Oliver lived with one older brother that he looked up to and younger triplet sisters who enjoyed his company. After his brother went to war and dubbed Oliver "the man of the house" he done all he could to care for his mother and sisters to the best he could. His sisters would always invite him to play games with them like tea parties, house, and sometimes out to the playground if they got permission from their mother. The triplets were even more ecstatic when Oliver became home-schooled by their aunt, even though they didn't know at time was because of his school life before.
Him and his sisters did all they could to make online camera time with their brother and father the best in case the worst should come according to their mother.
Other Relatives:
The only cousin he didn't get along with was a cousin who he never realized was jealous of Oliver's happy family. But even to this day, Oliver never held any grudges to his cousin as he once hoped that maybe they could've reconciled if it weren't for the incident.
Foster Siblings:
Will update in the future.
█ B a c k s t o r y;
He was born and raised in a semi-rural part of the city with his family of his parents, his siblings, and a few relatives that live around the area. Well that was at least until his father and older brother went to serve in the army, leaving Oliver, his mom, and triplet sisters at home in the rest of the family's care. While it wasn't usual for some family members serving or previously served the military at one point, Oliver wasn't quite as used to that fact. The reason being that after hearing that his grandfather served in the war and died, he feared the worst for his dad and brother even when his mother tried to assure him that they will be alright.
He lived in a very happy home with his caring mother and energetic sisters but his school life was not as happy. There were a group of bullies in his school that liked to specifically pick on people like Oliver because he couldn't stand up for himself. However, being the naive kid that he was, he didn't even tell anyone of the abuse because he didn't want them to be in trouble. He couldn't keep that facade for long when his mom noticed Oliver coming home beat-up and a bit malnourished even though his lunchbox was empty. She tried to teach him that it wasn't okay for people to take advantage of him but Oliver still wouldn't budge on his morals on people. The cycle at school continued until Oliver's mother put her foot down and had Oliver home schooled by one of his aunts who was a teacher. This worked for a while as Oliver became healthier again until the family moved to another state to support some other relatives who needed some financial help.
The relatives in question were a workaholic aunt, a house-husband uncle, and a rude cousin. Oliver's aunt and uncle seemed to love Oliver and his sisters but the cousin instead bullied his younger cousins, mostly Oliver for some reason. Oliver, who was raised by parents who taught him that family sticks together, didn't know what wrong he and his sisters did to deserve this sort of treatment, so he tried many times to be kind to his cousin by learning how to cook to "make up" for whatever he did. This seemed to aggravate the cousin to bully Oliver more for picking up "girly hobbies" and other things even though Oliver was being genuinely nice to a bully like him. Oliver ended up telling his mom, aunt, and uncle about his cousin's behavior when his tolerance broke after seeing one of his sister's toys broken by the said cousin. His cousin ended up being grounded and Oliver feeling bad, but was assure by his mother that he did the right thing.
After a while when his relatives' seemed to have enough financial stability to keep themselves afloat, his mother thought about moving back with her children in tow since she wanted to surprise them for when her husband and oldest son come back from the military. Oliver was packing his stuff when his cousin called him over to help him with an errand, although Oliver had a bad feeling he accepted helping his cousin to hopefully make up and be on good terms before going back. He told Oliver that he lost something important in the nearby mountain when he was with his friends and he has to get it back before anything happens to it. It was somehow enough to convince the already naive Oliver that he went with his cousin to help him search for the important object in question. When they arrived at the mountain without their parents' knowing, they began looking until his cousin said that it could be near the chasm. Already sensing some fear Oliver tried to convince his cousin not to until his cousin offered to make sure he doesn't let Oliver fall. He went with him near the chasm to search for the important thing, being convinced that his cousin did care for his safety. After searching around the chasm's edge, Oliver was about to point out that nothing was there when he felt being shoved into the deep chasm, not knowing that he was betrayed at the time.
Centuries later he was revived and was adopted into a new loving home with Toriel and the rest.
█ B a c k s t o r y; (Fell!Oliver AKA Silver)
Being bullied at school made Oliver very aggressive and violent but it never changed the way he viewed his family thankfully. But at school he looked out for himself and tried his best in his studies even when his classmates oppressed him. He stubbornly stayed there even when his mother tried to convince him to be home-schooled because he wanted to give back all the hard work his family gave him.
When his family moved to help some distant relatives he cared a lot for his cousin who was nothing but kind to him and his sisters. However one day his cousin ran away because of his parents' abuse so Oliver went to find him. He found him at Mt. Ebott weeping and as Oliver went to comfort him, he had to shove his cousin away from the decaying rock he was sitting on next to the chasm and fell down into the same chasm in the process.
After years later he was revived and taken in by a mother who reminds him a lot of his own, including some other kids who annoy him.
█ B a c k s t o r y; (Swap!Oliver AKA Brownie)
After his mother died giving birth to his sisters were born and his older brother went to the army, Oliver was left to be only family member who actively shows that he cares unlike his father who went into a depressed state, became workaholic and continued to ignore his children out of grief. After some emotional negligence him and his sisters were sent to live with some relatives who worked at a farm and the siblings lived happily. That is until his father demanded custody of his children and in a fit of rage Oliver ran away to Mt. Ebott, unknown that he would never go back to his family.
Years afterwards he was revived and taken in by Asgore and his family.
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Hello! I am a Scorpio and a ESFJ-A.I am extroverted and I love to make friends and help others.I am pretty Diplomatic and Smart.I am pretty Funny person to be around with.I am an open ear for everyone. I am also a very Lazy person , I pretty much hold up with emotions, and don't open up very much and it's hard for someone to make me Angry.My Hobbies are Cooking,Baking ,Photography and at times Singing too. I am Ambitious in What I am doing and I need it to be perfect. Thank you
Ikemen Sengoku
I’d pair you with.......... Masamune Date!
So I was thinking about Sasuke. I feel like he’d really appreciate your humor and your intelligence. Besides, it would be a calm but sweet relationship! Nothing too crazy, not a lot of drama, just a lot of love. The two could sneak out and do some phone photography (since I’m not sure how you’d get a professional one).
However, Masamune would be a better option (in my opinion). The two of you hit it off pretty quickly since both of you are extroverted and friendly by nature. Unlike most people, you’re able to brush off his advances without getting too upset. It’s a bit surprising, but he finds it heart-warming in some odd way.
He’s also going to drag you off your butt to help him cook up some of his antics. While it may seem like a lot at first, the payoffs are so worth it. Watching Hideyoshi’s face contort into rage, Ieyasu’s eye-rolls, Mitsunari's confusion, and Mitsuhide’s curiosity replace the need for any TV. But Masamune knows that you like to enjoy your free time without any disturbances, so he’ll make the exception to lounge around and simply talk.
You could teach him how to bake! Since baking isn’t as prevalent in the Sengoku Era, you could show Masamune all the cakes, brownies, and baked desserts. In return, Masamune teaches you cooking techniques for recipes that are popular in the Sengoku Era. It only takes a few days before Masaume makes a three-layered velvet cake with gold decor all on his own. But he gives all the credit to his amazing teacher-- you.
He’d always stand by your side when you’re trying to achieve your dreams. Although his loyalty is towards Nobunaga, his heart will always be towards you. If you commanded him to go to the depths of hell, he’d go do it in a heartbeat. Sometimes, he’s a little too enthusiastic about helping you, so you have to remind him not to neglect his own dreams too.
Another Possibility: Sasuke Sarutobi
Ikemen Revolution
I’d pair you with..........Luka Clemence!
So Edgar was the first person who popped into my head and not gonna lie, this would be the power couple of the century. Everyone admires the skill that is shared between the two of you. You guys could take over the entire world with Edgar’s cunningness, your ambition, and the shared intelligence. The only thing preventing that from happening is that ruling the entire world is a lot of work and you’d rather not deal with all that work.
However, I ended up going with Luka. It might take some time to warm up to him because he can be quite shy and to himself, but I think your extroverted attitude would force him to interact. Slowly but surely, he’ll find himself gravitating towards you more often. While he doesn’t admit it at first, it’s your sunshine attitude and friendliness that really grabbed his attention.
Thank god for someone who doesn’t submerge themselves in chaos. Luka is absolutely thrilled that you’re lazy because he appreciates the calmness that comes with being lazy. If he sees one more person running in the hallway or screaming at the top of their lungs, he might actually choke himself.
Whenever you crack a joke, Luka can’t help but give a small smile. The corners of his lips curl upwards and a soft laugh escapes his chest. It’s almost magical how you get him to smile within seconds.
Another pair of cooking buddies! You often find yourself at the kitchen, helping Luka while he prepares meals for the Black Army. The two of you experiment with tastes, smells, and textures, trying to create the best recipes. Whatever the two of you decide on always ends up being a culinary masterpiece. Besides, the two of you always feed each other with small spoons (to check the taste and show some extra love).
Luka definitely opens up to you first. He’s fallen in so deep that he can’t hide anything from you anymore. He’s honest and earnest in revealing his history that you might feel inspired to return the favor. Together, there’s nothing that you can’t do.
Another Possibility: Edgar Bright
MLQC
I’d pair you with........Kiro!
So I considered Victor because Victor would inevitably fall for you. You extend your friendly attitude to the biggest brooder on the planet and he appreciates that. Besides, you’re ambitious and always strive for perfection, which is pretty much his life motto. He respects you and finds himself growing closer and closer.........
But then comes Kiro to ruin everything lol. Seriously, the connection is almost immediate because both of you have such vibrant personalities. He’s thrilled to meet someone who actually wants to be his friend (not someone whose trying to take advantage of his celebrity status).
Kiro always flocks to you when he has free time. There’s nothing like a nice lazy day with his loved one. Sometimes the two of you might lay in the sun as Kiro points out all the wacky-shaped clouds in the sky. You can't help but plant a small kiss on his cheek as he points to the sky.
If anyone is going to get you to open up, then it’s going to be Kiro. His caring aura creates a soft, nonjudgemental atmosphere for you. He’ll manage to get straight to your heart with his honey-dripped words. And when you do, he’ll engulf you in the warmest hug you’ve ever received in your entire life.
DIY Chips! Since Kiro lives off all those salty chips, you realize that its possible to make a healthier alternative at home. So you call him over and the two of you try to replicate store-bought chips. After endless trials, you guys get absolutely nowhere (you figure out that there’s a bunch of extra stuff that you need to add that you don’t have). But that’s ok because you got to spend a bunch of time with Kiro (and that’s the real victory here).
You’re just an unofficial photographer. Sometimes he might be something cute or photogenic (and you just have to take a picture). After a few candid shots, you show them to the star. He’s absolutely thrilled, wondering how you’re able to capture his best angles within seconds (especially since his photographer takes forever during shoots). Now he might call you over for professional photography.
Another Possibility: Victor
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Serious question... Do you have any recommendations for quarantine snacks?? My snack pile is slowly dwindling and I need some good suggestions to stock up on again so I can stop eating pasta and rice and beans every 30 mins...
Well i guess that depends on wether you’re looking for snacks that fit in a diet or if you don’t mind gaining a few.
“Calorie bomb” list
Pecan’s or almonds, a healthy choice but very high in calories that’s why it’s on this list (any type of nut works, these are just my favorites)
Potato chips
Any kind of candy you have never really tried, i discovered Maoam pinballs, i’m obsessed.
CÔTE D'OR BonbonBloc, it’s not even funny how good this tastes, here is a link https://hollandshopper.nl/Cote-d-or-bonbon-bloc-praline-wit
Drop or licorice i guess in English. Dutchies know a thing or two about good drop. It’s an acquired taste but i think it’s awesome.
French Toast (no i don’t feel ashamed to eat this as a snack at times, it’s not a regular breakfast option over here)
Fudge
Good old grilled cheese or Mac and Cheese (basically just add cheese to everything).
Chocolate chip cookies
Homemade sausage rolls (i can’t deal with the store bought ones since i know what kind of meat goes in those). Making them is actually really easy and pretty cheap.
Cupcakes, brownies, cake basically all the baked goods (but you know, bake them yourself).
“Let’s not gain a 100 pounds during quarantine” list
Popcorn (the plain type, not with butter or sweet stuff)
Carrots/bell peppers/celery or apple slices with humus or peanut butter (try 100% peanut/other nut butter, way less fats and calories).
Any kind of fruit, i’m currently into oranges (try something adventurous if you’re bored with your usual choices).
Homemade rice cracker pizza (basically you just put some cheese and tomato’s on a rice cracker and bake it for a bit).
Greek Yogurt with berries (tastes soo good)
Hard boiled eggs, not everyone likes it but i do from time to time
Mini (beef) burgers on vegetable buns. I use lettuce, eggplant, sweet potato or pineapple. Just toast/bake the make shift bun and put the meat (don’t forget to add spices) with maybe a bit of cheese on top between the make shift bun. I even eat those cold, it’s really good.
Pickles, i love them, you might hate them.
SOUP, soup is awesome and you can use basically any kind of ingredient. Homemade vegetable or chicken soup was a staple in my childhood for rainy sundays. Not a lot of things make me feel better than recreating that and having a small bowl with a piece of toast. Also easy to freeze, i always have like a liter in my freezer that i can defrost and heat up.
Homemade potato chips, i guess that’s not super healthy but that depends on how you make them, you can make them without the insane amount of calories or fat.
I personally love Mexican food so i’m going to add in Tortillas with any kind of filling. Obviously you can make that as calorific as you want but it is possible to keep them low calorie (corn tortilla’s are a better option than flour tortilla’s if you want to watch the calories).
Good thing to remember is that if you make things yourself it’s often times healthier than the store bought kind. It also requires you to be busy and put work into it so you’re more likely to not do it. If you want brownies get the ingredients, don’t buy them ready made. You’re less likely to eat brownies if you have to make them yourself than if they are just there ready to be eaten.
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Sebastian is by no means a healthy eater. He will eat whatever is put in front of him. He knows enough ettiquete to know how to eat a little of stuff he doesn’t like. But here’s the thing if you give him something he likes, for example pasta, portion size, self control with eating healthy it goes right out the window. It is almost better in those cases to serve Sebastian instead of letting him serve himself because he will eat you out of house and home if given free reign. He likes to eat, he likes the food he likes.
Sebastian however isn’t the biggest fan of sweets. He doesn’t like cakes or anything like that. Again he will eat politely when offered or at a restaurant. The two exceptions are brownies that are frosted. The other exception is American Kit Kat bars. He knows the European ones taste different, and he clearly prefers the American version. He wont really eat any other candy.
Sebastian however does tend to lean towards healthier eating. Not that he really cares, if its good food he’s going to eat it. But he does try to have well rounded meals. Its just he sees food he likes and all things he has learned about nutrition just goes out the window.
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Depression/DPDR food hacks from a dude going through it real much
Source(s): sad, not real
popcorn (u can make urself to be healthier but if prep time is a bigger issue for making yourself eat then just buy some. Boom Chika Pop is my favorite for cheap and healthy. Smartfood is great but it’s not as healthy and it’s lowkey a drug)
Ice pops (if you get the fancy real fruit organic ones you will remember how great they were for years to come... and also that sometimes you can’t drop $8 on ice pops. A smart bitch would get a mold but I’m not her yet)
Fudge pops or some other sorbet pop (I try to stick to healthy-ish stuff cause I know if I’m left without any vice foods I’ll fully make and eat frosting, which is stupid. It’s great I know how to slap together a buttercream but No)
Apples or bananas or other hearty fruit that can get ignored for a hot minute
Edit: I burnt my popcorn so much it hotboxed my entire apartment so trust me at ur own risk
Bagels are the most versatile bread thing
A protein (I’m failing this pls do better babes)
Holy fuck box macaroni or single serve other shit. Don’t let the stigma hold u down taste the 90s
Teach urself how to cook while ur having a good day or a lot of spoons or have added to ur spoon count with meds or weed; it’s so great to know how to make brownies. If u space out a lot high or in general be careful and don’t burn ur stuff or your u
Apologize to your cat for burning your popcorn and he stayed in the kitchen with you because he loves you a lot but Jesus like protect ur cat self pls I’m sorry it’s so much smoke my dude I’m s
Naan is a meal; you can also make pizza and flatbreads on naan! If they have mini naan get that they do 12 packs sometimes and I love those so much
U need butter
U need some kind of milk
FLAVORED FIZZY WATER IS 0 CALORIES AND BETTER THAN SODA USUSALLY. It also makes u feel more productive than drinking normal water.
Fruit juice represent
Oatly oat milk is a legend, a queen
This is information
Listen man
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Check-List for the Goals I settled for 2019
The funny mistake I’ve made earlier lead me think about what I’ve expected from 2019 when we started it. I found a list of the goals I made while we were entering the new year’s and here is a realistic evaluation of how it went.
• First of all, I wanted to manage my depressive episodes better. I wanted to have them less frequently. I wanted not to be absolutely crashed if a trigger hit me. Here’s how it went with a rough statistics (yes, because I’m a soon-to-be scientist, I actually made a graph of my own mood swings as if I am a test subject).
✔️ January was absolutely terrible for me. I had so much anxiety because of a toxic relationship and I wasn’t sure if I could ever live without that person. I failed two classes and withdraw a third one. I was super anxious about my internships. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be on the path I was and I was also having financial troubles. Also, one of my pet birds had passed away.
✔️ February was the month I truly felt like something in me was changing for the better. I felt like something clicked after the winter break— when I was, in a funny way, forbidden from consuming sugar for three days. I used to eat a lot of sugar/sweets to cope with my stress back then, to the point I still amaze at myself for not being overweight, plus size, or developing diabetes; because I really was eating too much sweets. But then I had a conversation with my father that feels unworldy, and combinated with the tree days no sugar diet and beginning of the new semester I suddenly felt like, even if I couldn’t fix everything, I could fix something. I had to start, regardless of how little. So I started by eating carefully— so significiantly less sugar consumed than I used to be, but I didn’t force it all at once. So if I were eating 3 brownies a day I decreased it step by step to 2 brownies a day, one brownie a day, and... At November 2019, it is probably a brownie once in 15 days. With even more pleasure than eating 3 brownies at once. (Don’t worry, I still let myself be free of eating whatever I want occassionally. I’m taking care of my health). Anyway. I started to hit up gym in my college for first time ever. I was so painfully inconsistent, but I knew that much was to be expected, so instead of getting angry at myself for not being a regular I just appreciated myself for going despite not being a regular.
✔️ March was a turnpoint. I decided to be bold enough to pursue my ex hobbies that I lost because of depression, one of them being writing. I’ve had a strong muse for Norman back then. I made a new account on Facebook. I knew no one, but to my luck I made so many friends. I drowned in NorRay ship with a very nice roleplay partner. I built new friendships away from the toxic partner of mine who was seriously causing a lot of damage on me. By the end of March we broke up and— surprise, my world didn’t end. I felt so refreshed, so alive, as if I was freed of my chains, and up until this day this feeling stands. I was more eager to pursue new hobbies, talk about my interests and do crazy shit instead of worrying my ex would think. I was happier. Much happier. This too, is still valid.
✔️ April was... unworldly. Because something that relates to my society happened as a big improvement and I was extremely positively surprised. This feeling is valid up to this day as well.
✔️ May... May was wild. I got kissed by a random stranger at the spring fest party. This fucking event lead me to write Conflict. Seriously. I built stronger friendships, online and offline, during this month. I felt truly connected.
✔️ June!!! June was so weird! It was my first break after one or maybe two years of depression. It was my first free holiday in which I didn’t reall feel like I was a waste of time, space, effort, money, etc. I got to walk around streets with a burden off my shoulders after so long. I got to look forward to the next days. The insecurities hit me up sometimes, but significantly less frequently, as I aimed in the beginning of the year. At this point I have had lost a good 5 kgs and had been eating very healthily too, and I was enjoying this new healthier lifestyle I adapted. This is still valid too.
Let’s examine June a little more carefully. At the end of the June I was going to go out of town to have an internship at a very prestigious university out of town. Which meant I had to stay in student dorms. I had no background about my field of internship yet. I was going to be utterly alone and I was freaking out about it. I’ve spent last week of June extremely tense because I don’t live in dorms normally and sharing a space with people and being alone at a professional place and things like doing laundry felt terrifying. But at the same time I was proud of myself because I’ve had always wondered how life would be living in a college campus, and this school I went was the best in my country equal to the university I am attending. Overall, it was prestigious and I was very excited.
Another important thing about June was that I’ve had written almost ALL of Conflict in my head with two of my roleplay partners eagerly listening to me and encouraging me whenever I plotted.
Have you noticed this?
My story was completed BEFORE I even posted.
At the end of June, a few days before I was about to leave for the internship, I had a breakdown. I had a bad breakdown. I had first draft of Conflict completed but I could never get to edit it. I could never get to post it. I didn’t even have an account. I didn’t really expect much interest in the story either, I just... I don’t know. I think I just thought, “Wow, this plot is so feelsy. I shouldn’t keep it buried in me. Maybe other people will love it too.” and I... kept Conflict waiting... for so long. Then I had a breakdown thinking I can’t do a fucking thing right and I’ll never get to post anything because I always let my “depression” take over it— which is a funny excuse because I wasn’t even depressed at June. Scared yes, but not depressed. I hate playing the victim. Objectively speaking, I wasn’t at my best but it wasn’t my worst either. Anyway. I left first chapter of Conflict linger there for a few weeks, hopeless that I could ever post.
✔️ Then comes July. I came to the internship city! It was AWESOME. I LOVED the campus, LOVED the experience, LOVED my field, and ENJOYED dorm life. I made many friends. I had roommates. I worked out more often. I went to sightseeing. I extended my network. I did A LOT of fun stuff.
On the first night I was at dorms, my two roommates were out. I didn’t know anyone yet. I had ONE night free to do anything. I was... in an awe. So I opened the documents. I looked at the pretty sight from my dorm room and I said, “Well, let’s do this.”
It was like a torture to finish that first chapter.
I had no expectations when I posted.
But oh my god, it felt like something clicked when I posted! Getting my story POSTED was a significant proof that I was SERIOUSLY moving on from the LAST traces of depression. It was something I created. It was MY productivity. It was ME. But in a way it was everyone. I felt extremely happy. Oh— did I mention Conflict is my first fanfiction?
Anyway, then I began to look forward to updating. Living in campus had it’s amazing advantages, such as no time wasted on transport, and ability to chill at coffee shops or 24/7 open library ALL NIGHT if I wanted. Which was wayyy less depressing than the environment of my house. I wrote. I felt super engaged. The simple fact that I could exist and produce something and have other people respond to it was something I could never imagine myself doing back on my depressed days. (But I could totally imagine this BEFORE I got in depression. In a way, I was back. I am still back. And I’m so grateful.)
I wasn’t only fooling around to write, though. I’ve been learning a lot. Experiencing a lot. Living a lot. It was amazing. I even binge watched Harry Potter with my roommate— and I hadn’t rewatched it before. (I had fucking forgotten that Sirius died, lmao.)
I also briefly fell in love again. It was a nice brief summer thing. Still think she’s amazing.
I need to go now, actually, so I’m abrubtly cutting this post off halfway to edit later. I don’t know what I earn by sharing this. I’m definitely not looking for attention— maybe you’ve realized it before but I give very little fucks about what people around me say (except for constructive critism). But somehow, I felt as if someone needed to see this. I don’t know that person. I don’t know who they are and when they are reading this. I just want people to know that there is an example of a girl who seriously changed a lot within span of a year by constant hard work, gentle-self-talks, and constant push-throughs even when she’s not motivated. Right now I’m far from being depressed nor suicidal, I’ve lost enough weight to dress up all bold clothes I LOVE to wear, I’ve built self-confidence, etc, as I will edit later. I just... want you all to know... even if this is not valid for everyone if you want something to happen you have to MAKE it happen. And it actually HAPPENS when you MAKE it happen. So, you don’t have to stay stuck in a bad cycle. You don’t even need a new year’s eve to do this. I started at february, see?
So do your best! I’m cheering for you!
Edit: I’m back. So point of this post was to check whether I’ve reached my goal of having less frequent depressive episodes. (Because I know I’m human and depressive episodes can hit ANYONE, so I didn’t have an unrealistic “I’ll never experience this again” expectation but I did have the expectation of “I’ll experience this maybe once or twice in a year, move on fast w/o unhealthy coping mechanisms and I’ll stay connected to LIFE instead of dissosciation” and I’ve achieved this.
A fast summary would be,
July built my self confidence at all aspects, from my hobbies to my career, my social skills to my curiosities. It was amazing.
August-September was vacation. One month of having a blissful vacation without feeling like a burden. One month of having full bliss. No depressive episodes not even once. I was regularly working out and I didn’t gain any weight even though I eat sweets and nice food everyday because of “holiday”. I went to a dietician in the end to find out my blood sugar is very healthy and my weight is normal now.
At the end of September & beginning of October I was nervous because of school, but I handled a lot better. I have done my best. I have truly done my best. I attended almost all lectures, I engaged in the material, asked all questions on my mind, went office hours, stayed active in newspaper, continued to hit up gym regularly, built more friendships, ALSO STAGED A THEATRE TEXT I HAVE WRITTEN LIKE THAT WAS AMAZING, and— and—
I don’t know, fast through November it doesn’t feel enough. I don’t know what I’ve honestly expected. But I expected to feel smarter or something, because science is hard shit. I expected better grades than this because I have honestly given it my all best. But the fact that my friends called me to reassure me made me really happy because one of my other goals was to build friendships and to think people, online and offline, check up on me makes me tear up. Especially when they are genuniely by my side as friends. It just feels so nice. So I’m feeling bittersweet.
I couldn’t lose any more weight since June, but I kept gaining/losing in some balance and I’m stable by now. My aim for February is to... lose 10 kgs in total— in a year. Which means I’ve got 4 kgs left to get rid of extra weight. I’m not really obsessed with body image, I’ve never been, but... What will I even do if I do not eat healthy and exercise? I mean, what’ll I even do? I like exercising and healthy eating. So I should just prevent stressful eating further so I can get rid of all the extra stuff. I’m already wearing all the pretty clothes I want and I do get stares because ;; idk they look cute I’m cute. Not in a narcissitic way. But self-love is important. I’m bi anyway, I do think girls are cute so since I’m a girl why shouldn’t I be cute as well?? A very feminine girl in fact, so like, hell yes, at least Nila can now wear whatever she wants and feels like she looks good on them so ONE OF THE MAJOR GOALS OF 2019 is fucking SETTLED!!
I’m planning to meet up my dietician again soon, and say that, “Look, I’ve come this far. Let’s lose 4 kgs in next 4 months. It makes 1 kg a month. Amazingly managable right? So guide me so I don’t ruin my health while thinning.”
So, I’ve managed my three major goals: Get rid of depression (learn how to burn it if it hits you); get a body you not only appreciate but feel genuniely HAPPY to be in; and built friendships and strengthen your bonds with people.
My two other major goals are incompleted, though. To cut it short, I wanted to get a better academic standing— from my first midterm grades I couldn’t really achieve that no matter how hard I tried, which is truly upsetting, but I have no choice but to go on. I love my major. I love science. I genuniely want to stay in this field. I don’t think I’m too idiotic to be a scientist. Sometimes I do think that, okay, but that’s a common thought in STEM majors. I do want to believe that what I work on will make a difference. It will have a meaning. So even though these results... are very discouraging to the point I felt really bad today, as if I could somehow, I don’t know, have a panic attack or something (I did not, I don’t have chronic anxiety or panic attacks or whatever, never experienced this). I just felt close to it, with increased heartbeat and feeling a bit dizzy and also very... imbalanced. But that’s probably because I didn’t eat well today, I unintentionally ate very little hence probably it exhausted me combined with bad news and saturday’s breakdown. Anyway. I have no choice but to go on, believing it will be better. My last major goal was to have a romantic partner, haha. Because I just want to. I mean, I don’t think I need to justify why I’d want a boyfriend or a girlfriend, and I don’t think I worked hard for this goal lol. I mean, I didn’t go out of my way to reach people. I liked like... three people this year, I still like one of them, but... It didn’t... go far. That’s probably because I still haven’t completely shaken off my shyness and unwillingness to get out of my comfort zone.
In conclusion, I have achieved 3/5 of my goals, which is more than half of it! So good job! For the girlfriend/boyfriend part, I, haha, I may neglect it for this year I mean it’s dumb to date someone just because??? You want to date before year ends right??? I mean, I’m not exactly angry at myself for that because it’s not only in my control so I think I forgive myself for not achieving that goal.
Academics though.
Ugh, academics are extremely terrifying to me.
That’s one big thing I need to settle.
On the bright side I have— two months! Silly me thought I have just one! So... let me... work hard in these two months!!!! And I’ll update if I can get a better GPA this semester. And if I get a lover. It’s ok not to have lovers but at least let me keep the GPA high I BEG you.
I’ve got new goals settled for 2020. But I will focus on achieving my last two goals before the year ends (academics mostly) and... update!
I don’t know who needs to read this. But I don’t mind having my journey posted at this point. I still feel very uncomfortable talking about depression, actually. But it was my reality. Now that I truly moved on, I can talk about it and critisize myself for all good and all bad.
I hope, to anyone who bothered to read so long, it gave some hope. That things can get better. That you CAN make things better little by little. 2020 can be your year. Or you can start on this very day like I randomly started on February (I didn’t have a thing for February, I just so happened to decide).
I’ll always be cheering those who do their best to make a difference.
Stay safe and let’s work hard. ❤️
Disclaimer: Some of my kind hearted readers were worried about me because Conflict describes unhealthy mindsets. Don’t worry— more than half of them are not based on my real life experiences! I’m not self-harming (never did, don’t think I ever will), neglecting antidepressants (I never used any actually), have suicidal tendencies (well, that part was real but no longer valid) AND I DON’T HAVE A RELATIONSHIP LIKE NORMAN/PETER sO Y’ALL CAN CHILL thank you for worrying about me I love you all
And I’ll be more than happy to be your goals-buddy if you want to change something about yourself as well!!!
#nila stuff#conflict#some stuff about#new year’s goals#2019#depression#is not permanent#i believe in u#goals#time managament#college
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SO my dumbass accidentally deleted the whole request because I was tinkering with the HTML on Tumblr mobile (it only lets me edit desktop-made posts as HTML instead of Rich Text). The app is a nightmare how do you guys use it as your base of operations sobs
Good thing I took pics of the req to show a friend before it got deleted except for the Yaku one /sigh/ Whoever requested this, I’m sorry if you won’t be notified because of my dumbassery lmao.
I’ll be putting it under a cut (this was what i was trying to do on the mobile but then i messed up).
Sugawara
Sugawara really doesn’t approve of your habit of hotboxing in your room to cope with the stress.
“There are healthier outlets,” he says.
Nonetheless, he is definitely the boyfriend that would go out of his way to get you your favorite food for when you’re under the influence, be it the brownies from the corner market or your favorite drink to alleviate the cottonmouth.
He tells you all the time, “This is the last straw,” with that mama bear voice of his, but you just know that he’d still let you off the hook, should you do it again.
“When you’re sober enough, I’m going to tutor you, okay?”
Best caretaker award goes to him 100%
Kenma
The first time he found out that you smoked pot, Kenma didn’t know what to do with the information, since it was pretty foreign to him and Kuroo never really exposed him to that kind of thing.
But when you managed to coax him into trying it, he became low-key into it.
Eventually, he even surpassed you at the art of blunt-rolling.
Although, he was no stoner. He’d moderate his habits since he knew that too much of anything was bad. He encouraged you to do the same.
But at the rare occasion when you’re crumbling from the immense pressure of your looming finals, he’d humor you and smoke a few joints of your favorite strain as a lo-fi playlist played in the background of your room.
When you’ve had your fun, he’d remind you that you still had exams.
“You know you can’t run away from your revising, right? Come on, I’ll help you out.”
Kenma would definitely indulge you but will also keep you grounded to your responsibilities owo
Nishinoya
Oh, no. Here he comes. The campus weed boi.
Since the two of you initially bonded at a party because you got your stuff from the same guy, Nishinoya knew the ABC’s of stress relief via getting high. Eventually when he became your boyfriend, he decided to crank things up a notch, too.
He’d bring along his massive bong when he’d hear about you stressing over exams, of course.
“Yuu, what the fuck?”
He’d grin at you cheekily before unpacking all the things he brought for the sake of your peace of mind.
He’s always told you that bongs get people really high really fast so that just meant that the high would fade just as quickly.
That wasn’t always the case, so you’d end up baked for at least three hours, depending on what strain he got you.
Instead of reviewing, you’d be giggling and making out with your boyfriend as you took turns hitting the bong.
“I’m sorry,” he’d murmur against your mouth. “I was supposed to help you, but I got you further off track instead.”
But that was all right, since there wasn’t anything better than Noya cheering you up in the best way he knows.
Revising was for chumps, anyway.
Kageyama
Kageyama was pretty adamant with the fact that you smoked weed in general since he’s a pretty traditional guy.
He sees it as some act of rebelliousness.
It was a walking-on-thin-ice kind of topic, so the two of you would just avoid talking about it, since you weren’t willing to quit and he didn’t try to accept it.
But one time, the tension just spilled over and the two of you got into a really messy fight that lasted for days.
Your mind was a mess -- finals was coming up, your boyfriend isn’t making it easy for you to find solace, your stash was running low, and your dealer was heading out of town.
But then, as you were hitting the last joint you could roll up, Kageyama emerged from your door with a clear plastic bag full of what seemed like a whole ounce of weed. You could see there were still stems and little seeds mixed at the bottom though.
“I heard your dealer was away,” he muttered, giving you the plastic bag of obviously bad weed.
Man, you never thought you’d live to see the day when your boyfriend would personally buy you a gram, much more a whole ounce.
You tackled him onto the floor and peppered him with kisses.
“H-Hey, you need help with revising, right?”
“That can wait, Tobio~”
Yaku
To your surprise, Yaku makes really really really good edibles. The ones he make are on practically god-tier compared to the others you’ve had the pleasure to taste.
His specialty lies in cannabis infused chocolate bars.
Yaku is very popular for them in the underground, but he only takes a few orders at a time because they’re really tedious to make. The most he’s made was about four batches within the span of three months.
Nonetheless, his space brownies, for lack of a better term, were out of this world.
As you were lamenting over the fact that your professor still hasn’t sent the slides for some of your coursework, you were munching on the brownies that simply melted in your mouth.
At your request and after a long time of convincing him, Yaku made you six laced brownies every week. You insisted on a dozen but there simply wasn’t any bargaining with him.
“If I find you dead from space brownie overdose I might actually jump off a cliff, you know?”
Still on edge, you ask Yaku to come over because feeling the effects of his godly creations isn’t as great when you’re alone.
When he came, he’s carrying a basket in his hands. It’s strange since he only brought out the basket when he’s giving you something special. From what you recall, you still have about three brownies left.
With a warm smile, he hands it to you. Once you peek under the cloth that covered its contents, you almost dropped it.
“Yakkun! Didn’t you make about three orders of this last week?” you nearly yelled in his face as trembling fingers reached out for his heavenly pot chocolates sealed in a Ziplock.
He shrugged. “I know how hard you always are on yourself during finals week. I figured I’d spoil you a little.”
You sure didn’t make any mistake in dating your university’s edible legend.
#haikyuu!!#haikyuu!! headcanons#haikyuu hc#haikyuu#sugawara koushi#kozume kenma#nishinoya yuu#kageyama tobio#yaku morisuke#typing it was fun the first time but im not having fun the second time
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