#breathing through the pain

[insertsomthinawesome]

WHUMPTOBER 2022 - DAY 15 - Breathing Through the Pain

Finally Drew the red dead outfit for this SDLFIHGLIHFGD The question of “What are you wearing?!” will have to wait until he’s doing better :’D

-NO ROMANCE INCLUDED-

[myfriendcallsmeasickwoman19]

Role Reversal

@smellofsnoww for you, ma'am

@irathgo

This was inspired by another post, which I'll tag after I find it.

****

Keir was shaken awake by the loud banging at his door. He had fallen asleep on the couch again. Evie meowed at him, taking a scared stance behind his table.

"It's ok girl, I'll see who it is." He said, trying to reassure her as he looked for his keys.

He caught a glimpse of his clock, it was 02am.

Keir shook his head, he found the keys already at the door, he unlocked it.

Theo stood at the door, well barely. He breathed heavily, hand to his rib, mostly beaten and chewed up.

He was obviously bleeding underneath his dark heavy coat.

"....can…I st…stay…th…the night…?" He asked, barely able to even talk.

Keir just moved to the side and Theo staggered inside. Keir quickly closed the door behind him.

He quickly rushed over to help Theo stay standing as he was looking close to keeling over.

Theo hissed, when he held his arm to keep him up, agitating the knife that might have punctured his lung.

Keir helped put the doctor on the couch.

Theo was holding back screams as every movement sent waves of pain around him. He tried to even his breathing so he wouldn't worsen the damage done by the knife.

Keir didn't say anything else, only rushing to get his first aid kit.

"What happened?" Keir finally spoke, while taking out the contents of the first aid box.

Theo shook his head, "first…" he motioned for the small knife.

"Be…rea…ready…pu…pull…it out." He huffed.

Keir nodded.

"Hands….wash…now…" Theo ordered, even though his voice was weaker it still had some strength to it.

Keir tsked but we to wash his hands as quickly as he could. He came back to Theo.

The young doctor was staying awake through sheer will but looked ready to pass out.

Theo nodded in approval. "... gloves…" he said again.

"I don't know if we have enough time for all this." Keir expressed, his monotone voice present even now. He still wore the gloves though. "You're bleeding on my couch."

"....go���od.." Theo continued, "now…clothes…"

Keir sighed shaking his head and moving over to slowly help Theo with his clothes.

First it was the large coat, it was supposed to be a lit brown but now was mixed with blood and mud.

Theo bit his lip, his body trembling from the pain.

"You know you're going to have to tell me who did this to you." Keir said, as he finished with the coat and put it to the side.

"....later…" Theo told him, he breathed a little heavy after that, but had to calm it when the pain spiked.

Keir shook his head, then helped Theo with his other layer. A simple dress shirt, that was now stained red from the blood, he carefully unbuttoned it and helped take it off him.

Keir could now see the obvious marks that showed what might have happened.

"ambush" Keir said,

"...focus…" Theo said, barely holding back his pain.

Keir listened, "what next?" He asked him.

"Painkillers?" Theo asked.

"I'd need to go find them," he looked outside.

Theo shook his head, "I'll…. have… to manage." He said.

Keir was unsure but didn't say anything, Theo knew better.

"Knife.." Theo said, "pull it out…. and stop any bleeding." His breaths were shallow.

Keir nodded, turning around to get a towel he had in the box.

Without hesitation Keir put his hand on the knife.

"Get ready." He warned Theo.

Theo gave a shaky thumbs up and readied himself.

Slowly Keir began to pull the knife out and Theo obviously wasn't enjoying it.

Theo wanted to get away from the pain that exploded but tried to keep himself still, K also held him back.

The young doctor held back screams, his mind getting muffled with nothing but pain. It felt like eternity as he pulled it out.

K kept a straight face though, when it was finally out Theo was thankful.

Keir placed the knife down then turned to Theo, he immediately dabbed some of the blood away.

Now came the hard part of stitches, Theo had a towel in his mouth, biting down as Keir stitched the wound closed.

In the end, Theo was still finding it hard to breathe, barely able to keep his eyes open.

"Needle," he said, not very aware at the moment, looking just ready to pass out.

Keir looked at him, a worried expression on his usually blank face. But now he was also confused.

Theo tapped a part of his chest, "air." He said, finding it hard to breathe.

Keir understood, he got an empty syringe and placed it on the spot, Theo tapped.

He was careful as he put it in, just as careful when he pulled the excess air out of Theo's lung.

Theo gasped, his eyes going wide. He involuntarily took in a deep breath but it was alright cause he could breathe again.

It still hurts but it was better.

He gave K a slight nod of thanks, before finally giving in and letting his eyes close.

Keir brushed the sweat from his face and pulled back the hair that got stuck. Theo was looking pale and tired. Well it's what you'd expect.

He was definitely in a fight, Keir noted. He took Theo's bruised knuckles and began to clean them. Bandaging them up, he applied ointment to the places he got hit that were obviously discolored.

This wasn't a fair fight, Theo isn't the most skilled but it's obvious he was targeted. Not for money or belongings, that's for sure, if that was the case he wouldn't be here.

Keir continued with the wound care until everything was treated. He wanted to put him in bed but wasn't sure if he should move him yet.

Theo didn't look so comfortable anyway, it's hard to be when you got stabbed and got treated without painkillers. But it's nearly nothing new.

He covered the young doctor and tried to put him in a comfortable position.

Right after that he went to look for some other things they might need and figure out who did this.

****

Keir came back hours later. He found the painkillers and antibiotics he might need.

"Ok so where's the patient." James asked, yeah he went to get him.

Keir walked into the apartment, James followed behind.

"Here," he said, sitting back on a chair a few feet away, watching them.

James nodded, imm sitting close to check on him. "isn't this your doctor friend?" James asked, still focused on work though.

Keir nodded, "he was a target." He said, his voice monotone as usual. "they weren't trying to be deadly at least."

"How do you know?" James asked.

"He's still alive isn't he?" He asked, "plus just a gun is enough or a bigger knife."

James turned to see the tiny knife on the table. He nodded.

Theo's breathing was a little labored and painful but he was alright. No fluid or air build up in his lungs.

"He seems fine enough." James said, it didn't sound like it was good news still.

"Come on." James said, "the couch is no place to rest for someone stabbed in the chest."

Keir stood up, he and James picked Theo up. The young doctor would only whimper and moan in pain. Then slowly laid him down and James made sure he was breathing alright.

James began to attach the IV bag to his wrist. Antibiotics and painkillers. Luckily he didn't lose so much blood to need a transfusion.

With his job done, James stood up. "You did a good job," he told Keir.

Keir was rubbing his hand across his knuckle, he was worried.

He didn't respond to James just looking at Theo.

"Be careful." James warned, noticing that look in Keir's eyes.

Keir nodded.

James sighed, "I'll come check on him tomorrow." He said, then left.

****

Theo moaned weakly, his eyes opening slowly. It all felt so fuzzy in his mind, he got attacked when walking to the apartment, they knew him and he had a feeling he knew who sent them.

His vision cleared and he realized he didn't dream that last part, he did walk to K's place, somehow. With that realization, the pain hit, it wasn't as terrible as he expected.

He finally also felt the needle poking his wrist, ok so he was on some painkillers, hopefully some antibiotics too.

He took note of things, paying attention to how he felt as he took a breath. Of course it hurt but everything was in order and he wasn't dying.

He felt the bandages wrapped around his chest, he lifted his hand and lightly felt them, they were done right and not too tight.

There was a small weight by his side, Theo looked to the side to see a small ball of fur.

He smiled at the sleeping kitten, reaching over to pet her. She probably thought it was K in bed this whole time. How long has he been asleep anyway?

The door clicked open and K walked in. He put his keys down.

"Good, you're awake." He said, walking over to the kitchen.

He always has some sixth sense about things. Theo wanted to ask him but he was finding it hard to let the words out.

"About half a day." Keir answered, "that's how long you were out." He turned and walked over to Theo with a glass of water.

Keir helped Theo drink the water and Theo thanked him with a nod.

"..re'd…you…go?" Theo asked, finally able to speak.

"Getting information," Keir answered.

He probably knows about all of it already. They should talk about what to do about this.

"We'll figure it out another day for now, take it slow." K said, "you can lay low here."

Theo nodded, that was a better idea.

A small meow came from the bed, Evie woke up. She yawned, he small mouth stretching as well as her black body. She made her way to Keir, he pet her for a moment. Before she turned back to Theo, rubbing her head against his fingers.

Theo smiled, petting her as she wanted. She began to purr the more he did it.

[casualavocados]

I asked myself why I failed to notice. It was the first time we'd been apart that long. I found the birthday gifts you prepared for me in my room, from my 18th to my 21st. ...Shut up. I started to think about what you were doing back then. Were you celebrating my birthday all by yourself?

KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 12

[s0fter-sin]

ghost stares at the ceiling, chest heaving in a harsh pant; sweat ice on his clammy flesh and soaked into the sheet he restlessly kicks away.

ears still ringing, his fingertips blindly drift down to trail along his vivisection scar. he half-expects blood to smear in their wake. his own line of solomon, who ordered him split in twain; half of him given to a grieving mother and half left with the grieving to be.

just for both his broken halves to be rejected.

what did it make him that his mother grieved him more than she loved him? that she begged to be relieved of him more adamantly than she begged to receive him? why did his worth spill out with his drawn blood? why was his pain lesser than hers?

his hand flexes, digging into the raised scar like it’ll part beneath his fingertips to plunge into his mangled insides. no one knows the cruelty of reforming the halved; his name, his being, not nearly as important as his body when he was stripped from himself. no one knows the pain of healing and understanding losing pieces of yourself means losing your value along with them.

how many more pieces did he have to lose before he was halved once more? before his very presence incurred grief so strong it was better to be rid of him than cradle his bloodied remains?

did the infant fight himself? did he age always at odds with himself; his halves never truly whole? he hopes he wasn’t, that he was spared the loss of self; the fear that one may be welcomed over the other.

who will he lose when the inevitable comes? when he’s ripped apart again? simon? or ghost? is it better to be cursed with choice just like his mother or live with an aftermath chosen for him? does it matter if in the end, he convinces himself there was nothing of him left to lose?

his head lolls to the side and the wild buck of his chest slows. he watches johnny beside him, his face lax with the rare peace of sleep; his cheek squished against the pillow, his lips pursed as long breaths escape him.

johnny. soap. never torn asunder but two all the same.

he carefully reaches out and ghosts his fingers along the jagged scar on his chin. even in sleep, he presses into his bloodied touch. he’s never fled his half-flesh, never shies away from his gore as it spills unbidden from his cleaved torso. he holds on where his mother let him go; cups his stomach to hold his insides in place and never minds the blood that drips through his fingers.

simon will never let him become his own solomon and cannibalise himself. he will never let him question which half of him has more value; which pieces he can afford to lose before he’s cast aside.

ghost’s soap. simon’s johnny. his.

whole, in any incarnation.

[the-bi-space-ace]

See, I hold back when I write. It could be far angstier than it is. I could be handing out forehead kisses left and right. Forehead kisses as someone cries and bleeds after a battle. Delirious from blood loss and pain and needing reassurance. Forehead kisses when they know their squadmate is going to die. A parting gift. One last way to comfort them, to remind them they’re loved.

I’m just saying I could make things more painful than they already are.

[louroth]

Hello hello everybody! It is time for another months progress, and I am so excited to share with you, all the things I have gotten my grimy little gremlin hands on. First off, what we are all here for; writing. I have been on fire, to be honest! Last month I churned through the last of the first batch of erotica stories (there's 6 (!!!) of them on my patreon already) and set them up for publishing along with two more unseen ones- I'm still going over the logistics of where to publish for the best revenue (I know this sounds boring, but I have to make an income somehow, and hopefully find another audience as a smut writer on other platforms 💀 I love writing it so why not!), and I am making headway, learning the ins and outs of self publishing. On patreon, there are also two Q&A's that are written in a bit more fictional manner, in character: a more fun way than just writing answers straight up and down. I have enjoyed those so much! There's a bunch of other stuff I haven't even mentioned- honestly, I have to say, I'm really proud of my output on Patreon even though I have been really anxious about writing full time. It's going great! I have to thank my new friends and support-network on discord; you make this all worth it. I cannot express how fun it is to shoot the shit with you in vc, gaming together, or seeing your shenanigans in gen or your in depth theories (thanks for the brainworms!) or memes or staring longingly at the fanfic channel or drooling over your art (ouro related or not) or... Gah. You are just amazing people, and I will waste no opportunity in saying so. Thank you forever and ever and ever an-

When it comes to OUROBOROS, I am happy to announce that the next chapter is damn near done! I was halted because of the discovery that dashingdon is no longer supported by it's creator, and have been working on the twine version ever since, earlier than I expected- it's tough work, but I am so excited to make this an actual game made entirely by myself, and not submitting to a company that quite frankly leaves a bitter aftertaste. It is taking long to make because I want to make it mobile compatible from the start, which there isn't a lot of resources for. But I'm doing my best! The plan is that I will be posting the next chapter for Patreons in the coming month, and then treat you to a full twine release here on tumblr. I haven't made any rewrites when porting the twine build, but I would like to do that too... so we will see; this plan is not set in stone. I will just have to see how it evolves over the next month. Yes, beta-readers is still on the schedule, just holding off a little while while I wrap my head around this new coding landscape.

Other than that, I have been working on the set aesthetic for ouro, which has been really hard, a lot harder than I expected. You all know I am no wizard when it comes to graphic design, but I want to at least develop a set palette and imagery and portraits that is cohesive to the story. The work is ongoing, and I don't have much to say about it- even though it is taking a lot of my brain power. I'm hoping I can come to some kind of set and in depth conclusion that I am happy with before the twine release, because I want the game to feel like a treat to open up and play; a world to get lost in.

That's it! If you want to see weekly and more in depth dev-logs, you know where to go. I hope you have an amazing day or night, and we will see each other soon. xx

[astarlightmonbebe]

that night we were fighting the fuma. i had a chance to kill one, but i didn’t. i couldn’t.

[adriartts]

goretober day 6: Transformation

this mermaid concept is not mine!!! it is cool as hell and comes from my homeboy @ch1ck3n-t03s

[genericpuff]

girl math is making $670 for the week and then spending $650 of it on a credit card bill and now you're excited because you made a profit of $20 in your bank account and $650 more of free money

[albatris]

What did you hate about Horrorstör? I haven't read it but I'm curious!

ok so

I have a Horrorstör rant locked and loaded and ready to go always all the time

I remember my main gripe with it was just. it had SUCH a fun and unique premise and setting but the actual story seemed determined not to do anything interesting with it

like. it’s IKEA! do something where they have to build furniture to create a barricade or do something spooky with the arrows on the floor going in circles, something weird and labyrinthine, do something with the restaurant and the meatballs, do something uncanny with the little model showrooms, ya know. make it IKEA. make it a story that can only happen in an IKEA

from what I can remember it just plays out like a regular haunted house story that just happens to be set in an IKEA. there was nothing unique about it at all

but I think the thing that REALLY ticks me off about it is that it has such an intensely unique premise that no one can take it and do it better lest they just be blatantly copying the book's whole deal

“oh but Monday there are no unique ideas” yes there are and Horrorstör was one of them and we’ll never get to see it live up to its potential. I am raking my fingers down my face

also the characters were extremely unmemorable

but anyway

the book has 4 stars on goodreads so maybe it’s fine and I’m just petty

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[aalghul]

even the least ooc recent talia characterizations will write her as a ruthless ice queen. once that ends is when we’ll truly get talia back. not to say that she couldn’t have grown more firm as time went on (because she did, as seen between post-tower of babel & pre-datm)….but that doesn’t mean she becomes an entirely different person for no reason other than it’s easier to constantly butcher her character if she is no longer allowed to be vulnerable and open with her love. lol. even in her lexcorp era she’s still fairly loud about loving who she loves, it’s just the sense of loyalty that she’s trying to separate from that love.

[icewindandboringhorror]

sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:

thing that I already do

thing I have tried 10 times

thing I already do

thing that I don't have the money to do

thing I already do

thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail

thing that is impossible given my situation

thing that doesn't apply to me

thing that I already do

thing I have already tried

hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently

thing I have already done

[sxnbleachedfliez]

reading tsc . im not having a good time .

[venacoeurva]

Trying to figure out how bad a dent on an ipad (newer ones, not the old home button form) has to be to affect the internal parts because one I'm looking at has a sizeable but shallow one, and the amount of people like "IS THIS DANGEROUS?!" and it's like. a tiny scratch on the side of it, not even bending or cutting into the screen or affecting the shape of it is astounding

[badolmen]

Joy, Devil's Breath by Michael Rudin Google Drive link be upon ye.

[phagodyke]

the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍