#breaking my never ending tumblr break w these i think their nice

[completebest]

camcorder pictures that i had seemingly forgotten about

[goldribboncottage]

Hazel Callahan Fanfiction

I haven’t posted on tumblr dot com in probably three years. I don’t know how it works.

This is my untitled fanfiction about being Hazel’s sisters’ nanny and falling in love. I haven’t written a fanfiction since I was in middle school. Enjoy.

Untitled Pookie Story 

It wasn’t supposed to end up this way. You weren’t supposed to fall for the bosses daughter. You barely knew the boss had a daughter. Mrs. Webster mentioned in passing that her oldest was off at college, and didn’t tend to come home on breaks. 

“I have another child at Amherst, but that won’t be relevant to this position. It’s strictly caring for the twins! She never comes home anyway. A lot of people ask, what was I thinking having kids 20 years apart, but it’s truly a blessing to start over. No need to relive mistakes as a first time mom! I’m so excited to have someone so kind caring for my babies.” Mrs. Webster almost hired you on the spot. 

You wondered about the elder Webster. She probably wasn’t called that, being from her first marriage. Whatever, it’s not like you would be seeing her at the new job. There were no pictures of her in the house, but you knew her old bedroom was across from yours, and you took over her old bathroom. Being a live in nanny, your priorities were the 4 month old fraternal twins, Isla and Sage. 

Two months in and you had the twins on a great schedule, and hit your stride. Making friends wasn’t always easy for you growing up but you fell into an easy friendship with a group a little younger than you. PJ and Brittany were nice people and you had a lot in common. Brittany was a cosmetologist and cheered for a local sports team, and PJ had her own podcast. They had known each other since high school but quickly accepted you as one of them. You had hung out with them a lot since moving, and gotten to know their wider group of friends. 

The best part about being an infant nanny was the nap times. Mrs. W didn’t expect you to do any chores or extra work, so you’d usually hang out in your room or the common areas. Today being the first warm day in a while, you took the baby monitor outside and read on the back porch. 

Nearly falling asleep, the porch swing was your favorite part of the house. Sure, Mrs. Webster had a huge house from her first divorce settlement, and plenty of money of her own, but this little corner felt like your place. Big and comfy, naps outside always came unexpectedly. 

*Movement at Front Door*

Waking you, the Ring notification flashed on your screen, and you figured it was Mrs. W coming home early. She usually texted, but maybe she forgot. Typical for a woman in her 50s who married a 28 year old surfer and divorced him before their children were born.

Re-entering the house to greet Mrs. Webster, you were met with a surprise. A very short, shaggy haired, blue eyed surprise. 

Hazel POV

I’m not sure why I decided today was the day to come home for the first time in five months. After helping my mom with her two little mistakes for three weeks I decided it hurt too much to be around them. Just more reminders my mom chose a new start over me. 

I didn’t bother telling my mom I’d be coming home, she’d prefer I stay in Massachusetts. But it was spring break, and I missed my friends. PJ mentioned my mom hiring help, but I didn’t care about what she did. She was always looking for ways out of being a parent. 

There was a foreign car in the driveway, with a Callahan Motors license plate cover. Must be a guilt present from my dad. Another SUV for my mom to drive around the little brats in. 

I had planned on running home for a quick shower and change of clothes before meeting up with PJ, Josie, Isabel, and Brittany. 

I hadn’t planned on entering my home and finding it filled with stuff I didn’t recognize. Shoes that were way too young for my mom filled the rack in the closet, another with jackets I didn’t recognize. Huh. Must be another crisis, this time in fashion. I made my way to the kitchen at the back of the house when something stops me. Or rather, someone. 

Reader POV

“Who the fuck are you?” The tiny masculine girl scoffs, rounding the kitchen island. 

“Who am I? WHO ARE YOU? Why are you here? Get out! If you don’t leave I’m calling the cops!” unfazed, she grabs a drink out of the fridge. “I’m serious. I am responsible for this house and all of the people in it right now and I am not afraid of you. Get out before I make you get out”

Sensing your change in tone, she puts her hands up in defense “Hey, I live here, I could say the same thing to you.” She sips her drink and doesn’t break eye contact. 

“You don’t live here! I’ve NEVER seen you before! I live her with Mrs. Webster and her daughters. I’m calling the cops. You can get out now or wait until they-“

“Whoawhoawhoa, pleasedontdothat. I’m Hazel. Callahan. My mom didn’t tell you about me? Are you like the maid or something? I’m just visiting for spring break. I live here. Seriously.” You stared at her, as if telling her to go on. “If I didn’t live here I wouldn’t know there’s a chip in the upstairs bath tile I never told my mom about, or that the fourth step squeaks on the stairs, and I have two baby sisters! I know their names! Isla and Sage! They’re like, little! I don’t know how old they are! But they’re still, like, babies, I think!” 

You put down your phone. So this is Mrs. Websters oldest daughter. Hazel Callahan. You wondered why you had never heard her name until now. 

“They’re 6 months old. Next week will be 7.” You explain. “And I’m not the maid, I’m the nanny. I live in the room across from yours. I told your mom about the chip in the tile. I thought I did it when I slipped coming out of the shower.” She laughs. You can see it now. Sage has the same deep blue eyes, and Isla’s hair is just a shorter, thinner version of Hazel’s. “I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you.” 

“It’s nice to meet you too. Sorry about the mix up. Where are those little rugrats? I haven’t seen them since they came out of the womb.” She puts back her drink and starts to make her way to the nursery. 

“Wait! Just look at the monitor. They aren’t supposed to wake up until 3.” You hand her the monitor, and she grabs it slowly. Your hands brush, and you explain to her the differences in the girls. 

“Isla has the dark hair, like you and your mom. Sage has lighter hair but darker eyes. Blue. Like yours. Dark blue. And big.” Hazel glances at you with her big blue eyes and meets your e/c ones. “They’re so adorable. When she stares at me I swear my heart melts. I’m such a sucker.” You shake your head and giggle, thinking of the tender moments you’ve shared with the babies. Hazel looks up at you from under her eyelashes. 

“Adorable?”

“I mean the babies.” You step away slightly. “Speaking of, I have to get their food ready. Today they’re trying peas for the first time. We are all very excited.” 

“Thrilling. Well, I’m going to go upstairs. I have to be somewhere. It was nice meeting you.” She tips her head in salute and walks off. 

“You too, Hazel.” You whisper. 

She comes down as you are wiping mushy peas off the girls and their high chairs. 

Wow. You’d never had a certain type, but Hazel was definitely it. She looked good in an oversized t shirt, vest, and nike sneakers. “Hey.” She rocks on her heels, almost looking scared to approach you.

“Oh! H-Hi. We just finished. This is about as clean as they will get if you want to come say hi. They don’t bite! They really can’t, yet, they’ve only got two teeth each. Isla did bite me once but that was only because she thought I was food!” Sensing you were over talking you pick up Sage and offer her the Hazel. The younger girl backs away, a concerned look on her face. “Oh, sorry! I forget not everyone is a baby person. You don’t have to hold her. She’s really good at sitting now! You can play in the living room while I get Isla cleaned up.”

“I’m good, but thank you. I have to meet my friends. I haven’t been back in a while. I don’t know when I’ll be home tonight but I told my mom I’m in town. See ya” She exits quickly. 

Hazel POV

I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. I don’t know why I can’t handle being around my sisters. I mean, I haven’t met a lot of babies, but I’ve never been scared of them. Maybe it isn’t them I’m scared of. I’ve stayed away from Rockbridge for a reason. Let my mom have her perfect little life without me in it. I don’t need her anyway. But that nanny is something. Hiring someone to live at your house? At MY house? God. Who knows what’s next on the divorcee-crisis list. 

I pulled into the parking lot of Bottoms, the greatest and only queer bar in town. I could see my friends at their usual table inside. At least one thing was good about coming home. 

“Hazel!” Isabel rushes to hug me, and I can tell a line is forming behind her. She kisses my cheek and tells me how much I’ve been missed. “You need to come back more often!” 

“Yeah, it’s not like Amherst has anything to offer but snotty WASPS and fake deep classes.” PJ chimes in. 

“Hey, Hazel’s doing great there! And don’t hate on Massachusetts, Emerson was your top choice.” Josie adds, defending me and our college towns. 

I’m glad to see nothings changed. 

After a couple of drinks, I decide to bring up the incident earlier today with my mom’s new nanny. 

“Oh my god! Y/N? We love her! Why didn’t you invite her out? I can’t believe she thought you were an intruder. That’s so funny. I’m texting her right now.” Brittany whips out her phone and clicks away. 

“Wait you guys know her? Like have her number and text her know her? How come no one’s told me about this!” 

Josie answers first “Well to be fair when we met her we didn’t know she was their nanny, and you don’t really like to talk about your family so we didn’t bring it up.”

“Yeah Hazel we always want to respect you, especially since everything happened with your dad and then Jeff. Your mom has put you through a lot in the past” Isabel takes my hand and comforts me. 

“Yeah that AND the fact that Y/N and I are totally gonna bone. She’s a lesbian, as we all are-“

“I’m still not gay, PJ.” Brittany interrupts. “And Isabel is Bi.”

“Anyway, AS I was saying, there’s totally tension there. It’s only a matter of time before we’re scissoring and run away together.” 

“PJ, you barely talk to her, and she’s the only one who is as much of a bitch as you.” Brittany quips. “You get humbled every time Y/N opens her mouth.”

“I like a challenge, baby.” PJ blows Brittany a kiss and swigs her drink. 

“Anyway it’s not like we only like Y/N because she works for your mom. She’s super nice. She’s 26 and has more life experience than all of us combined. It’s like she’s lived 30 lives. She’s so cool.” Josie says, changing the direction of conversation. 

“Yeah, okay” I say “I’ll try to get to know her better while I’m here.” I think back to earlier in the day. Y/N looked so happy talking about Isla and Sage. I can’t be second place in another person’s life. 

Y/N POV

Brittany has been texting you about Hazel since yesterday, trying to get you to come out with them tonight. So when she calls you on Saturday morning you immediately pick up. 

“PLEASE babe it’ll be so much fun. You literally live in the same house as her, you can carpool! And Hazel doesn’t drink she can be your DD. I know you want to come out, just do it! You deserve a night out, pleeaaase” 

“Okay okay fine. But I’m coming for you. It’s been like a week since we saw each other and I’m literally dying because of it.” 

“YES oh my god - PJ SHES COMING!” You hear her yell off into their shared apartment. 

“Tell her to wear something tight and short!” PJs voice is distant but clear.

“PJ says-“

“Yeah I heard. God she’s ridiculous. I’ll see you tonight. I don’t know if Hazel’s up yet but I’ll ask her to drive me”

[seelestia]

who are a few mutuals that you appreciate alot? mutual appreciation day 🥰❤️😊🤩💐✨

OOOO FUNFUNFUN!!! thank u so much for sending this in and for essentially spreading positivity, nonnie. this is appreciated ♡ also, instead of strictly moots, i decided to extend my appreciation to everyone! moots, anons, friends and readers alike ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა

some odeliaesqué sappy appreciation under the cut:

@yvnaology - one of my fav facts abt yona was that she's one of the first moots i ever had on tumblr!!! and she's a lyney kisser and a fellow aventurine kisser (#taste). also she's so silly (/aff) and easy to talk to! like u'll feel at ease around her. she deserves good great and awesome things in life, so make sure to water ur yona daily with love <3

@solarisfortuneia - mika wished me congrats when i reached 1k and i still remember it till this day <3 she's friendly in a shy/modest way and suchsuchsuch a good writer! e.g. i cry over this every day actually. mika also has her silly moments sometimes too. someone save her /j

@floraldresvi - simply the sweetest & most supportive moot EVER! vivi is full of love and she's good at giving some of that love to others <3 her selfships are like bottles of serotonin to me. 100% would drop anything and everything in my hands to support her!!! and ik she'd do the same for me <3 mwah mwah 💐💐

@monicahar - the moot who comes online once in a while and drops absolute meals when she does. ate, left no crumbs 🔥🔥 also SUPER FUNNY!!! and unhinged, i'm concerned but amused at the same time. i hope she's having a nice break!! thank u for ur past & future services ma'am. we love u 🤭🤭

@milk-violet - MIREI !!! sunshine personified but also vv precious. i'm the leader of # protecc mirei squad (real). best person to have ever appeared in my notifs and i lovelovelove when her username pops up. take care & good luck with school! IK U CAN DO IT. remember what i said: slay before ur slayed 🗣️

@xianyoon - the butterfly moot 🦋 !!! both socially and aesthetically hehe. sosooso sweet & kind. has creative projects and executes them well at that too. i personally crown her as genshinblr's best hostess™! also, send her a moodboard and she'll cherish u forever - that's one of her love languages <3 ++ her pretty & aesthetic rb's are such a good refresh for my dash. love her for it!!

@hermosacolibri - the name, 'starlight' fits them sm bcs i feel like if we were to take a peek into their mind, stars will burst out!!! /pos (<- unique complimenting skills ik pardon me). their ideas are brilliant and i can tell they put their all into pursuing their vision <3 it's truly an honor to be a witness & reader. if u want to check them out, they write over at @/starlightlacrimosazpsff !!! ★

@wolfhookk - aaaaa ri !!!! booping her x1000 rn bcs i cannot believe boop trend ended when she came online. the discrimination 😔 /j i'll always remember ri as my first ever moot on here like first, 1st, #1!!! i forever thank her for swooping into my inbox back then and she's welcome to do that even now any time she likes <3

@kaiserkisser - skylia is the true angst consumer, the realest of it!! even in different fandoms LOL. she's nice (and gremlin-ish) when u get to know her more and she reciprocates energy really well! i'll never forget the disaster of boops in my notifs /lh

@callilouv - COOL MUTUAL ALERT !!!! cool art & cool interests. truly, picasso w/ the finger and fandoms!! idk if cal still draws with his finger dhjahshsj but still vv mega cool!

@manager-of-the-pudding-bank - the grandpas & old men kisser where art thou 💔 /j loqua has that awkward & silly rizz!!! idk if she still does wax stamps but i still think it's really cool. bcs qua's just cool in general !!! hehe

@calxlu - aaaaa vi!!! the one who enables my rambles and selfships shhshsh i am so thankful <3 rambler 🤝 rambler is the best. i love talking to her and it's super reassuring to know that it's mutual! even if i take some time but i always look forward to seeing her replies in my inbox. it's like we're penpals across the screen talking abt irl stuff and our f/o's ꒰✿´ ꒳ ` ꒱♡

& honorable mention: @/zhongrin. rin does not interact with minors anymore (which i respect and so should everyone!), so we count as former moots. but !!! i still think she's an amazing person regardless <3 (note: her blog is equally as great but plsplspls be mindful of her rules beforehand.)

brainrot anon - A REAL ONE!!! always there when i come back from the grave each time. i get reminded of them whenever i look at my inbox, it's an instinct atp. their brainrots are so fun & random (but that's a charm in itself /pos) !!! tbh i love elaborating them all so never stop sending the brainworms in <3 feel free to treat my inbox as a drop-off for ur thoughts LMAO /gen. come by again soon!

michiki anon - MY COUSINNNMNMN!!! i still love and miss when they'd come into my inbox to chat. it was so nice getting to know someone in a casual way <3 i hope ur doing well wherever u are, michikinon! i'm doing well these days and i hope u are too 🤍

rix anon - their series still has me FLOOOORED. i still think it deserves a proper platform than just thru my lil ol inbox. it deserves more recognition :( but just the fact that i got to help share their writing alone is an honor of its own!!! i hope ur doing well too, rix anon <3

++ everyone who has left a nice feedback / said anything nice in my notifs or my inbox!! even a simple 'cute' or 'this is good' or even just leaving a note means sososo much to me. i'm just a measly guy in my own little corner on this site, really - so thank u thank u thank u all !!! 🫂

[roblogging]

just another anon sending you love <3 i hear you. it can be such a frustrating space to exist in for anybody, but particularly trans people, and it’s so rubbish that people will default to bigotry when they disagree with something as inconsequential as different hcs.

i think the space you’ve created through your presence in this fandom is something really beautiful and comforting - i always check your pages for updates bc (well honestly bc i’ve never seen a bad take from you and you have a way of putting things that is so eloquent and understanding that i find myself looking at things i might’ve dismissed (*cough* snupin) through a completely new lens, BUT ALSO—) your accounts just feel very welcoming and safe.

i resent the fact that in every fandom space there are going to be awful people (even if i understand that there will be) but i also think that while, like you said, your existence is not a protest, it’s kind of like a symbol of pride (i don’t even mean like pride month pride idk another word lmao) as in, the more people like you who are creating safe and inclusive spaces in a fandom where the original creator has done so much to erase or belittle the existence of so many groups of people, just shows that all those people deserve to exist and deserve to be happy and deserve to enjoy whatever brings them happiness. i think it’s honestly really powerful even if it might feel pointless at times. i’m so sorry people have been so horrible bc i genuinely dk a nicer person in this fandom than you and you really don’t deserve anything but the best.

some people are going to be attacked no matter what space they exist in and so i think it is important that we exist and exist loudly in spaces where the creator is obviously so against them. like—yes, obviously also with trying not to support her in any way. (can’t believe some people don’t understand that means anything officially licensed is a NO esp when there’s so many amazing unofficial small businesses out there) but anywayyyyyy this is essentially just a v long and v rambly way to say thank you for the space you’ve created and i’m sorry that people have made you feel this way. i really appreciate what you do here. also, marauders tiktok is fr becoming more and more frustrating to engage with so i wouldn’t blame you if you ended up deciding you need time away from that space.

ok anyways yeah bye love you thank you <33

p.s. i’m so excited to keep following along w your fic!!!!!!!!!!

i am going to WEEP reading through all these asks oh my god :')))

pride is the word yes !!! not here as an act of protest or as a token trans person, but because i take pride in this 🤝🏻 and i take a LOTTT from hearing that i've formed a nice lil space (again, might weep)

YUPPP marauders tiktok is,,, hell. it's probably not even that noticeable because i've still been posting but oh my god i dread opening up that app. i barely look at my comments which isn't great, i just delete the negative ones that come in which isn't fab because there's so many nice ones that i miss but UGH.

it's just so backstabby and negative and clout-chasing over there. but i have a nice bubble !! i really do, but i can't stop people from entering it :/ which sucks BUT !!!

definitely gonna take a bit of a break from there. get settled into uni, finish writing the fics i have going atm, keep spamming tumblr 🙂↕️ and then hopefully be in a better space to interact there because it IS lovely most of the time

[inevitably-johnlocked]

feed me, stephie

LOVELY I am SO glad whenever you give me an open-ended request, because when I run out of lists that are ready for asks I've gotten, I can instead use one of my already-ready-with-no-ask fic lists instead, LOL... THANK YOU!!

Are ya hungry for some John Angst today? I think that's what I'm gonna feed ya! Hope you're hungry, it's a big one!

Apologies, there ARE some FFNet fics on here... that's how long I've had this list waiting to be posted LOL.

I hope you enjoy, Blue!!

JOHN 3rd PERSON POV Pt. 3: ANGST / ANGSTY FLUFF or BAMF FICS

See Also:

POV John First/Second Person Pt. 1

POV John 3rd Person Pt 1: Fluff, Humour & PWP

POV John 3rd Person Pt 2: Whump & Hurt/Comfort

Too Much by belovedmuerto (T, 567 w., 1 Ch. || Empath AU ||  Empath John, Mild Angst, Cuddles) – Sometimes, it's too much for John.

Five Seconds by xXLadyLovelaceXx (K+, 658 w., 1 Ch. || TGG Pool Scene, Friendship, Introspection) – In the half-second before Sherlock shoots the jacket, John notices something.

Tea by Art and Soul (K, 693 w., 1 Ch. || Angst & Friendship, Reunion) – John’s habit of making tea for two has little use, considering his flat-mate has been dead for three years. But he keeps on making that second cup, hoping he’d wake up and it’d be gone. But it never was…

The Sidewalk by politewarning (K, 956 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TRF, Angst, Friendship, Sherlock’s Birthday) – Standing on the sidewalk outside the hospital on the 6th of January to have a one-sided conversation with his dead friend was not something John had intended to make into a ritual.

Booted by Sexxica (E, 1,175 w., 1 Ch. || Trapped, Kidnapping, Handcuffs, Biting Kink, Blow Jobs, Coming in Pants, Tight Spaces, Humour, Smut, 69 Sex Position, BJ’s Through Pants) – John and Sherlock have been kidnapped, handcuffed, and stuffed together in a car boot. How come they can never take these situations seriously? Part 3 of the Tumblr Ficlets Gone Wild

Shooter by Amputation (K+, 1,406 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TRF, Suspense, BAMF!John) – The men were trying to rile the other into acting first, it seemed. How boringly predictable and dull this was! 

Risotto by Richefic (K+, 2,153 w., 1 Ch. || Friendship, Angst, Misunderstandings, Apologies) – The first time that John cooks dinner for Sherlock is almost the last. Fortunately, Sherlock is really quite observant. Inspired by John's reference in "The Great Game" to there being some leftover risotto in the fridge.

A Room of One's Own by whitchry9 (K+, 2,174 w., 5 Ch. || S2 Timeline, Hurt/Comfort, Supernatural, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Coma, John Whump, Worried Sherlock, POV John, Angst, Friendship/Bromance, Hospital) – When a severe head injury lands John in a coma, somehow he ends up in Sherlock's mind palace. It's actually pretty nice there, and John is entertaining the notion of staying there, rather than returning to his broken body. But Sherlock isn't taking it as well, and John can feel him breaking around him.

Those Days by StillWaters1 (T, 2,663 w., 1 Ch. || Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, PTSD / Sensory Attacks, Caring Sherlock) – If Sherlock had danger nights, then these were John's danger days.

BBCSH ‘Lament’ by tigersilver (T, 2,951 w., 1 Ch. || Implied Infidelity, Angst, Post-HLV, Canon Divergence) – When Sherlock is alone in the flat he still speaks to John Watson.

Undercurrents by entanglednow (E, 2,996 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Disturbing Things, Crime Scene Fetish, Pseudo-Necrophilia, PWP, Masturbation) – “There, that's it, perfect, shut your eyes and don't move - and don't speak."

Until the End of the World by SarahCat1717 (G, 3,049 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, First Kiss, Pining Sherlock, Oblivious John, Drunkenness) – Taking place in Season 3, John listens to an old favourite song and sorts through his memories and feelings about Sherlock and Mary.

Fortune Favours the Wet by CaffieneKitty (K+, 3,668 w., 1 Ch. || Adventure, Trapped John, Mild Peril) – There was something to be said about the quiet of the bottom of a well... Things go wrong for John during a case.

Because Your Coat is Part of You by camellialice (K, 3,705 w., 1 Ch. || 5 and 1, Canon Compliant, Sherlock’s Coat, Angsty Fluff) – Five times John wore Sherlock's coat and one time he didn't need to.

The Dance Lesson by bittergreens (G, 4,596 w., 1 Ch. || TSo3 Missing Scene, Dancing, Pining Sherlock, URT/UST, Romance, Angst, POV John) – Sherlock teaches John to dip. Part 1 of Goodnight, Vienna

Wasted Hours by songlin (E, 4,973 w., 1  Ch. || Omegaverse || O!John/A!Sherlock, Pining, UST, Angst & Porn) – John is respectful. John keeps his distance. He doesn’t look at Sherlock when Sherlock decides trousers are for dull people. He doesn’t breathe in and savor it when Sherlock flings himself onto the couch first thing in the morning, wafting alpha scent, dressing gown settling around him in a cloud of blue silk. He doesn’t linger when he’s piecing Sherlock back together after a fight, even though he’s half-dressed and beautiful and right there. He can ignore it. He can control it.

A Case of Identity by PostcardsfromTheoryland (T, 4,978 w., 1 Ch. ||  Post-TRF, John on Holiday, Pining Sherlock, Whump, Angst, Reunion) – All John wanted was to get away from London for a few weeks. No people pointing and whispering about Sherlock Holmes when he walked past, no reporters wanting an "exclusive" about the dead detective, just some rest and relaxation in the sunshine. Then again, these holiday trips never seem to go as planned.

Electric Potential by pygmymeese (T, 5,011 w., 1 Ch. || Supernatural) – It's not clear why everyone in the world suddenly gets a ghost only they can interact with. All John Watson knows is that he's stuck with a brilliant, if smug, ex-consulting detective, and that life is definitely looking up.

Welcome Home, John by slashscribe (G, 5,504 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S3, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Awkwardness, Stabbed Sherlock, Protective Sherlock, Panic Attack (Sherlock), Self Esteem Issues, Love Confessions, First Kiss) – When John moves back to 221B, he thinks he’s the broken one, but after a while, it becomes clear that he might not be correct.

Excerpts from Purgatory by reapersun, what_alchemy (E, 5,829 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TRF, Doctor John, Reunion Fic, Rough Sex, Angry Sex, Bottomlock, Fic with Pics)  – John serves community service in homeless shelters for chinning the superintendent. Unbeknownst to him, the Homeless Network has his back.

This Year by DiscordantWords (T, 6,283 w., 2 Ch. || TEH Divergence / No Mary, New Year’s Eve, John’s A Mess, Jealous John, Awkward Conversations, Trapped in a Closet, Estranged After Return, John POV, Semi-Reunion, Angry John, First Kiss, Reconciliation, Clueless Sherlock, Happy Ending) – Last year, Sherlock Holmes showed up at the Landmark with a fake moustache and a bad French accent and threw John's entire life into disarray with two words: "Not dead." This year, there are more surprises in store.

An Interpretation of Viewing Habits by akitsuko (E, 6,653 w., 1 Ch. || Porn Watching, Masturbation, Anal, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss / Time, Declarations of Love, Jealous Sherlock, Fantasizing, John in Denial / Internalized Homophobia, Bottomlock, Pining Idiots, Sherlock Has No Boundaries, Cockblocking Sherlock) – John watches porn. It's a perfectly normal thing to do. If every video he watches happens to feature actors with remarkable physical similarities to his flatmate, well, that's no one's business but his own. Or: John is in denial, until his infatuation with Sherlock is impossible to deny anymore.

Second Waltz by Atiki (T, 6,685 w.,1 Ch. || MCD, Angst, Fluff, Cancer) – "The night I died, you wished I could wait for you."

A Kiss and a Cuddle should be Sufficient by Evenlodes_Friend (E, 6,853 w.,  3 Ch.|| Gay Sex Club, Fake Relationship, PWP, Orgies, Rimming, BJ’s, Violence, Case Fic, Voyeurism) – Going undercover, Sherlock and John pursue a vicious killer to a gay group sex party. Not unexpectedly, things get a little out of hand. Set after Baskerville, but before the Fall.

Hide and Seek by Arwen Jade Kenobi (T, 6,934 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, Reverse Reichenbach, Mycroft is a Dick, Depression, Case Fic, Friendship, Reunion) – Pseudo sequel to "The Refining Fire." "You owe him the truth, and you owe me the proof that will convince him that I had no part in this."

High and Tight, Soft and Loose by cwb (E, 7,429 w., 1 Ch. || Jealous John, Miscommunications / Misunderstandings, First Kiss / Time, BAMF John, Insecure Sherlock, Clueless Sherlock, Junk Size, UST / RST) – John pressed the knuckle of his index finger against his mouth and sighed. “So, you're coiled like a spring and ready to be ... sprung?” “If you want to be pedestrian about it, yes.” “Like I said, you should do something about that.” “And like I said, pedestrian. What would you have me do? Take up jogging? Yoga? Oh! Unless you mean –” “I don't mean anything. Let’s drop it.”

I can’t pretend by Salambo06 (E, 7,692 w., 1 Ch. || Fake Relationship, Victor Trevor, Jealous John, Miscommunications, Bed Sharing, Love Confessions, First Kiss/Time, Anal, BJs) – They had arrived more than a hour ago, and the moment they had walked inside the hotel reception, John had understood why Sherlock hadn’t wanted to come. Two men, posh suits and expensive watches on their wrists, had come to greet them with sharp remarks and badly hidden mockery, and John had seen red. Sherlock hadn’t said anything, mostly ignoring the two men entirely, and without thinking twice about it, John had slid an arm around Sherlock’s waist and introduced himself as his husband. 

Alone On the Water by Mad_Lori (G, 7,725 w., 1 Ch. || MCD, UST/URT, Angst, Euthanasia, Love Confessions) – Sherlock Holmes never expected to live a long life, but he never imagined that it would end like this.

Victim, Bait, Hero, Friend by KimberlyTheOwl (T, 7,887 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TGG Epilogue, Angst, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Past Kidnapping / Torture / Implied Rape, Panic Attacks, Worried / Possessive Sherlock, Lestrade is a Good Friend) – Some insights into why John was perfectly willing to throw everything away for a chance to kill Moriarty at the pool. Trauma, ugliness, and finally healing. Some nice supporting work by Lestrade as well.

Every Night I Look for You by destinationtoast (E, 8,377 w., 1 Ch. || POV John, Post-TRF, Angst, Mystery, Unsafe Sex, BAMF John) – Every night, John looks for familiar hints of Sherlock in the men he meets in bars, and he does with them all the things he wishes he’d done before. Eventually, he stumbles into a situation that Sherlock would know how to handle, and John must decide whether he can handle it without him.

Beyond the Vow by tunteeton (M, 8,994 w., 1 Ch. || Love Confessions, Angst with Happy Ending, Post-S3, Explosions, Mary is Good-ish?, 3G, Infant Death) – Being a sociopath was never this emotionally exhausting. 

The Frost Child by twistedthicket1 (M, 9,994 w., 2 Ch. || Frozen-ish AU || Magical Realism, Christmas, Angst, Fluff, Powerful John) – In a world where people are born with a Gift of varying levels, simple John Watson is the last person one might look at when thinking of any strong Magick capabilities. Hiding comfortably in the shadow of Sherlock's brilliant deducing abilities, John is content to keep it that way...

Ravish Me by amalnahurriyeh (E, 10,025 w., 1 Ch. || UST / RST, Makeup / Lipstick, Sympathetic Sally, Experiments, Pining John, First Kiss, Face Fucking / BJ’s, Cuddling) – Sherlock is experimenting with patterns of wear on lipstick in daily encounters. John is going to go insane.

Paparazzi by SilentAuror (E, 10,543 w., 1 Ch. || Post S3, Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Friends to Lovers) – John moves back into 221B Baker Street after his marriage falls apart and the paparazzi won't leave him and Sherlock alone about the status of their supposed relationship. Sherlock, of course, never denies it, until one day he does...

London Gods by a_different_equation (E, 11,092 w., 5 Ch. || American Gods Fusion || Magical Realism, Sex Magic, True Love, PTSD John, First Kiss/Time, Marathon Sex, Sensuality, Genie Sherlock, Human John, Internalized Homophobia, Star-Crossed Lovers, Soul Mates) – Sherlock Holmes is a jinn who does not grant wishes. However, when Dr. John H. Watson, recently returned from the war in Afghanistan, gets into his cab by "accident", it might not even need magic to grant both men their deepest wish: love.

The Red Dianthus by kinklock (T, 11,382 w., 3 Ch. || Supernatural Elements, BAMF!John, Misunderstandings, Fluff, Romance, Halloween, Dev. Rel., Case Fic) – The boys investigate a mysterious disappearance in a supposedly haunted house, and get much more than they bargained for.

The River Variations by withoutawish (T, 11,619 w., 1 Ch. || Soulmates, Emotional Hurt / Comfort, Three Garridebs, Romance, Light Case Fic, Near Death Experience, Angst and Fluff, Dark Humour) – John Watson never knew that he wanted a ‘no toast in the mornings’ normal until he realized what an honor it is to be destroyed by Sherlock Holmes.

Johnlock Ficlet Collection by Irrevocably_Sherlocked (E, 11,505+ w., 16/? Ch. || WiP || Random Ficlets, Pining, Angst, Fluff & Smut, Parentlock, AU’s, First Kiss, Character POV’s) - Just a collection of Johnlock ficlets, originally posted on my Tumblr page.

I See You Through by belovedmuerto (T, 12,078 w., 8 Ch. || Psychic AU || Empath John, Alternate TGG, Whump, Nightmares, Bed Sharing, Slow Burn, Pre-Slash) – John has never asked Sherlock about his past, his childhood, the reason he quails in lonely misery almost every time he sees his brother. He’s never needed to. Part 2 of An Experiment in Empathy

A Brand of Gold by aquabelacqua (M, 12,757 w., 1 Ch. || Mutual Pining, POV John, Phone Sex, Texting, Masturbation, Long Distance, Drunk Texting) – What am I doing? he wondered. The answer came back at once:  Flirting. He let the vital, missing piece snap into place as surely and as cleanly as if it had always been there. He was flirting with Sherlock Holmes.

I'm content as we are (but) by inqui (The_Circus) (E, 13,086 w., 1 Ch. || Jealous John, UST/RST, Pining, Victor Trevor, Minor Whump, First Kiss / Time, Misunderstandings) – In which John Watson sees something unusual, becomes jealous, and makes too much of a small thing as an old friend of Sherlock's shows up in the middle of a case.

On The Fence by BeautifulFiction (T, 13,770 w., 1 Ch. || Fencing, Case Fic, First Kiss, Insecure John, Pining John, Hug, Greg Finds Out) – The murder of the King's College fencing champion leads to revelations about Sherlock's past. Will it be the point that tips them from friends to lovers, or will they remain on the fence?

Speaker for the Bees by antietamfalls (M, 14,649 w., 3 Ch. || Deaf Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss / Time, Fluff, Sign Language) – It isn't always easy assisting a deaf detective. Luckily for John, they make a pretty good team.

Twelfth Night by yourdykeinshiningarmor (E, 15,139 w., 5 Ch. || Fake Relationship, Christmas, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers, Angst & Fluff, BJ’s, Anal) – John is invited to his aunt's Twelfth Night ball. Sherlock offers to attend with him as a friendly face among strangers, but John's family force him to address his true feelings for Sherlock.

Lacuna by coloredink (E, 15,607 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, Consent Issues, Drama, Amnesia) – God, it must have been terrible, to think that he would never have this again.

A Hundred Thousand Ways to Say the Name John by Jberry (E, 16,825 w., 1 Ch. || Fake Relationship, Fake Marriage, POV John, Pining John, Cruise Ship, Angst & Fluff, Case Fic) –  John Watson and Sherlock Holmes must solve a case on a cruise ship. To get close to the crew and passengers, they must get married for the case on the Baetica. However, their relationship hits rocky seas both due to the case and internal conflicts. Part 1 of Baetica

Best of Three by SilentAuror (E, 17,473 w., 1 Ch. || POV John, John is Shot, Porn with Feels, Post HLV, Rimming, Denial, Anal) – “You want to have sex with me,” Sherlock announces one evening about a year after John's divorce. John's vigorous denial sparks a three-day wager wherein Sherlock is determined to prove his point, and John is determined to hold onto his heterosexuality. Set well after HLV. (Canon-compliant). PORN. With feels.

Rupert Street by WritingOutLoud (M, 27,262 w., 9 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting || Case Fic, Sexuality, Demisexual Sherlock, Drugging, Smart John, Sherlock Has Internalized Biphobia, Fluff, Angst with Happy Ending, Gay Bar, Flirting, John Manipulates Sherlock to Eat, John Deduces, Arguments, Kidnapping/Torture, Hospitalization, John Whump) – Discharged from the war with nothing but the clothes on his back and a realisation of his bisexuality, John Watson has to learn who he’s become. He can’t afford London on an army pension, but the city is the only friend he has. In an effort to understand his newfound queer identity, he heads to a bar one night, where he stumbles across a mysterious stranger who turns his life upside down. ‘I dug around inside myself, and I'm not quite sure what I found, but it was beautiful and terrifying all at the same time.’

Vena Cava by SilentAuror (E, 27,452 w., 1 Ch. || HLV Fix-It, Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Infidelity) – Sherlock has been shot in the chest; John has been shot in the heart. Though everything is broken, they do their best to heal the wounds that Mary left on them both.

Silhouettes by allonsys_girl (E, 28,585 w., 7 Ch. || Canon Compliant, POV John, Heavy Drinking, Sad/Depressed John, Grief/Mourning, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Reunion, Foot Jobs, Blow Jobs, Infidelity, Cheating, Drug Use/Abuse, Anal, Switchlock, Rimming, Parentlock) – Sherlock and John find comfort in each other's arms, but as ever with these two, it's not your typical relationship. It's fluffy at the beginning, gets deeply angsty in the middle, gets porny at the end.

"finally kiss the bloody idiot" by Salambo06 (E, 29,812 w., 13 Ch. || Mutual Pining, Fake Relationship, First Kiss / Time, Angst, Misunderstandings, Fantasies, POV John) – Inspired by a fic idea on tumblr : "John and Sherlock know the Yard has a pool going for when they’re finally going to get together. It’s been running forever, and it’s worth thousands of pounds. It’s all fun and games, hahaha, until they find out Lestrade is in dire financial straits (dog needs emergency surgery, he’s putting his kid through gymnastics training, I don’t know, something), and they decide to fake a relationship to win the pool for him. Sherlock figures out the day and way that Lestrade thinks it’s going to happen, and they act it out. It’s all for a good cause, fake relationship style, until it’s not." Part 1 of The Pool

Lucifer's Gardens by ampersand_ch (E, 32,679 w., 12 Ch. || GERMAN VERSION|| Romance, Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Murder, Poison / Drugging, Mystery, John Undercover, Academic Club, Therapy, Rituals, Jungian Archetypes, Doctors & Physicians, Grief/Mourning, Esotericism, Hospitals, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, John Falls In Love With Another Man, Jealous Sherlock, Crying, Doctor John, Hand Holding, First Kiss/Time, Mysticism, Hugging, Touching) – John goes undercover for an investigation as a favour to Lestrade in a village in Suffolk. The events surrounding the case awaken deep-seated fears in Sherlock. While John begins to come to a realisation of what he needs in Lucifer's Gardens, Sherlock tries to find a way to reach John – in more ways than one.

The Whore of Babylon Was a Perfectly Nice Girl by out_there (E, 32,897 w., 1 Ch. || Past Drug Use, Blowjobs, Toplock, Mentions of Switching, Rough Sex, Background Cases, Sherlock’s Past, Sherlock’s Sexual History, Experienced Sherlock, Past One Night Stands, Fingering, Cuddling, Possessive Sherlock, Paris Holiday, Bed Sharing, Naked Lie-Ins, Bathing Together, Confessions, Worried Sherlock, Laying in Bed All Day, Meddling Mycroft, Naked Lazy Day) – Sherlock walks into a room and takes all the space right out of it. He does the same inside John's head.

The Curious Adventure of the Drs. Watson by ShinySherlock (M, 40,883 w., 14 Ch. || BBC & ACD Fusion || Victorianlock, Time Travel / Magical Realism, Friends to Lovers, Love and Kissing, Romance, Body Swap) – What if ACD Watson and BBC Watson switched places...  “Imposter!” Hands clenching the lapels of John’s coat, Holmes shoved him anew. “Yes!” John agreed, nodding, and then grimacing. “Sort of!”

Guidelines by WithLoweredVoices (M, 43,018 w., 15 Ch. || Winglock || Angels, Fantasy, Angst, BAMF! John, War, Jealous Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Jealous John, Falling in Various Ways, Needy Sherlock, Wings) – The Good Soldier, one of the oldest and strongest of the fallen, is offered a bargain: to live as John Watson and to Guide a fledgling archangel so that he will stay on the path of good. Of course, Sherlock Holmes has different ideas about his destiny. Fantasy AU. Warnings for violence, occasional gore, and a whole load of hurt and angst.

Left by lifeonmars (M, 45,153 w., 9 Ch. || Magical Realism, BAMF!John, Slow Burn) – John Watson is left-handed. He’s tried not to let it affect his life, but as any Lefty knows, that’s almost impossible.

Inscrutable to the Last by DiscordantWords (M, 48,842 w., 6 Ch. || Post-TRF, Alternate S3, John’s Blog/S3 is a Story By John, Divorce, Marital Difficulties, John is a Mess, Emotional Reunion, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Grief / Mourning, Pining John, First Kiss, Adorably Clueless Sherlock, Nostalgia, Love Confessions, Eventual Happy Ending) – He wasn't Sherlock, he couldn't work miracles. All he'd ever been able to do was write about them.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse by SilentAuror (E, 50,635 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S4/S4 Divergence, Case Fic, For a Case / Reverse Fake-Relationship, Conferences, Marriage Equality, Travelling / New York, Pride, Homophobia, Bottomlock, Marriage Proposal, John POV, Sexuality, Love Confessions, Emotional Love Making, Public Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Passionate Kissing, Needy/Clingy Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Touching / Hand Holding, Bed Sharing, Little Spoon Sherlock, Intense Orgasms) – John and Sherlock go to New York to attend a conference run by the National Defence of Traditional Marriage Coalition in order to investigate the potential bombing of the annual Manhattan Pride parade. As the conference unfolds, John finds himself repulsed by the toxic ideology being presented, which becomes relevent to his own unacknowledged issues and his friendship with Sherlock...

Fan Mail by scullyseviltwin (E, 53,942 w., 15 Ch. || Stalking, Obsessive Fans, Angst) – “WatsonChick143 has been rather maniacal in her commenting as of late… she’s left comments on everything you’ve posted John, something so obvious can’t have escaped even your attention."

Never Change a Running System by Lorelei_Lee (E, 54,246 w. || Pre-TRF, Romance, Humour, Drama, Sex Toys, Anal, Rimming, Masturbation, Frottage, Blow Jobs, Public Sex, First Kiss / Time, Virgin Sherlock / Loss of Virginity, Accidental Voyeurism, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Experiments, Naive Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Straight With an Exception John, Hand Jobs) – Sherlock discovers his sexuality – with far-reaching consequences for John.

Isosceles by SilentAuror (E, 56,609 w., 7 Ch. || Post-S4, POV John, Original Male Character / Sherlock Dates Another Man, Love Triangle, Jealous John, Virgin Sherlock, Sexual Coaching, Angst, Romance, Domesticity, Unrequited Feelings, Miscommunication, First Kiss/Time, For a Case, Friends With Benefits, Bottomlock, Love Confessions, Spooning) – After solving a case for a major celebrity, Sherlock gets himself asked out. When John asks, he discovers that Sherlock has no intention of going, at least not until John agrees to coach him through whatever he might need to know for his date...

You Might Just as Well Be Blind by ArwaMachine (E, 56,625 w., 12 Ch. || Fake Relationship, For a Case, Bed Sharing, Platonic Cuddling, Jealous Sherlock, Oblivious John, BAMF Hudders, Fluff and Angst, Frottage, Anal Sex, Happy Ending, Case Fic, Flirting, Pining John, POV John, Toplock, Possessive Sherlock, First Kiss/Time, Infidelity) – When a serial killer starts targeting couples, Sherlock and John must do what they have to do in order to get to the bottom of things. Unfortunately, John already has a girlfriend. Surely pretending to be in a relationship with Sherlock won't pose any problems with his relationship, will it?

Lunar Landscapes by J_Baillier (M, 57,046 w., 21 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || S3/TAB Fix-It, Slow Burn Angst, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Confessions, Drugs, Pain, Medical, Injury, Sherlock Whump, Mental Health Issues, Panic Attacks, Romance, Secrets,  Tragedy, Trauma, BAMF John, Doctor!John, Drug Addict Sherlock, Injured Sherlock, Grieving John, Idiots In Love, Protective John, POV John Watson, PTSD Sherlock, Sherlock is a Mess, Medical Realism) – An accident forces John to face the fact that Sherlock's downward spiral had started long before his flight to exile even left the tarmac.

The Bells of King's College by SilentAuror (E, 64,019 w., 5 Ch. || Post-S4, Missed Opportunities, Angst with Happy Ending, Fake Relationship, Case Fic, John POV, Jealous John, John in Denial, Travelling / Holidays, Virgin Sherlock, Wedding Proposals) – It's only been two weeks since Eurus Holmes disrupted their lives when Mycroft sends John and Sherlock to Cambridge to pose as an engaged couple at a wedding show in the hopes of solving six unsolved deaths...

White Knight by DiscordantWords (M, 69,840 w., 13 Ch. || S4 Compliant/Post S4, Marriage For a Case, Jealous John, Pining John, Janine / Sherlock Fake Relationship, Serial Killers, Case Fic, Undercover as a Couple, Weddings, John is a Mess, Misunderstandings, Wedding Planning, Jealousy, Drunkenness, Love Confessions, Angst with Happy Ending) – Green. The word green was used to convey a great many things. Illness. Envy. Inexperience. Standing there amidst Janine's chattering bridesmaids, watching Sherlock furrow his brow and study fabric swatches, watching him smile and simper and flirt, John thought it a remarkably apt colour choice. Because he felt quite sick to his stomach, he feared the source of said sickness might very well be jealousy, and he had absolutely no idea at all what to do about it. Or: Sherlock needs to fake a relationship for a case. He doesn't ask John.

The Monument of Memory by J_Baillier (M, 79,663 w., 14 Ch. || Post S4 Fix It Fic / S4 is Canon, Angst, Family Drama, Guilt, Case Fic, John Loves Sherlock, Complicated Feelings, Mentalism / Hypnosis, Murder, Grieving John, Sherlock is a Bit Not Good, Team Work, Trust Issues, BAMF John, Psychological Trauma, Protective John, Autism-Spectrum Sherlock, Parentlock, John POV) –  A genius traumatised by a past he's only beginning to recall. The psychopath sister that time forgot. A missing woman and a mentalist who may or may not be a murderer. And, in the middle of it all, stands John Watson.

A Cure For Boredom by emmagrant01 (E, 81,665 w., 8 Ch. || Dirty Talk, Threesomes, Light Dom/Sub, Sex Club, Experiments, Anal, Mildly Dubious Consent, Rimming, Cheeking, Double Penetration, Mild Kink, Porn Watching, Voyeurism, Masturbation) – They’d never talked about sex in the year they’d known each other. Well, that wasn’t quite correct: Sherlock had never said a word about sex; John had bemoaned his personal dearth of it on many occasions.

A Case of Identity by jkay1980 (T, 91,009 w., 22 Ch. || Post-TRF, Fake Relationship, Case Fic) – John and Sherlock have succeeded in rebuilding their friendship after Sherlock’s fake suicide, but an unusual case puts their relationship to the test. They pretend to be engaged and attend a marriage counseling workshop. Under the pretext of the case, Sherlock turns out to be a master of seduction, and John finally learns he might like Sherlock more than he thought. Slowly, John discovers that he loves Sherlock not only in a friendly, brotherly way, but both men have to fight their own demons before they can think of taking their relationship to a new level…

The Cost of a Wish by slashscribe (E, 102,493 w., 12 Ch. || xxxHolic Fusion || Spirits / Ghosts and Magic, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Soul Mates / Fated Lovers, Adventure, Immortal Sherlock, Powerful John, POV John, Frottage, Wish Granting, Angst with Happy Ending, Nightmares) – John has been plagued by a secret his entire life that has made him feel hopeless until he meets a mysterious, seemingly omniscient man named Sherlock Holmes who owns a wish-granting shop. Their meeting sets off a series of inevitable events that will change the course of both of their lives forever.

Maintenance and Repair by patternofdefiance (E, 106,650 w., 71 Ch. || Future AU, Augmentation || Augmented John, Depression, Body Modification, Slow Burn, Worldbuilding, Sci-Fi, Self-Care, Body Dysmorphia) – John wants to explain the rush of sensation and data, which is just another form of sensation (or is it the other way around?). John wants to say: Augmentation circuits report temperature, pressure, various forms of quantitative input. Sudden changes are reported as pain, since sudden changes are dangerous, and pain is the quickest way to encourage reflexive extraction. But all John can manage is, “Nng.” Because this sudden touch is not reporting as pain. Part 2 of STATIC

A Study in Winning by Jupiter_Ash (E, 106,658 w., 11 Ch. || Tennis AU || John POV, Dirty Talk, Mutual Pining, Misunderstandings, Happy Ending, Sherlock Speaks French, Switchlock, Wimbledon) – John and Sherlock are professional tennis players and it’s Wimbledon. One is a broken almost was at the end of his career, the other an arrogant rising star tipped for greatness. It should have been a straightforward tournament. It really should have been. How were they to know that a chance encounter would change everything? Part 1 of Tennis

The Burning Heart by May_Shepard (M, 119,150 w., 21 Ch. || Canon Divergence / Post-TRF / S3 Rewrite, John’s Sexuality, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, POV John Watson, Gay John) – When Sherlock dies, John Watson feels like his life is over too. He’s completely shut down, until Mark Morstan, a new nurse at John’s medical clinic, catches his attention, and helps him uncover the long buried truth of his attraction to men. Although he’s certain he’ll never get over Sherlock, John plans to move on, and build a new life with Mark, unaware that Sherlock is not quite as dead as he appears, and that Mark is hiding secrets of his own.

A Further Sea by i_ship_an_armada & ShinySherlock (E, 125,492 w., 23 Ch. || Historical Pirates AU || Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Doctor John / Pirate Captain Sherlock, Sailing, UST / RST, Masturbation, Action / Adventure, Mild Angst & Peril, Romance, Shaving, Molly/Janine, Bottomlock, Hand / Blow Jobs, Past Drug Use, Slow Burn, Mild Violence, Facial Shaving, Happy Ending) – Here be a tale of adventure for both body and soul, but beware if ye be not of stout heart, for this be piratelock, ya savvy? Luckless ship's surgeon John Watson takes a chance, and finds himself eye to eye with The Ghost, the scourge of the seven seas and a definite thorn in the side of the blaggard, James Moriarty. But when John finds there's more to this most cunning pirate than be meetin' the eye, he has to choose... is it a pirate's life for him?

The Horse and his Doctor by khorazir (T, 129,003 w., 13 Ch. || Horse / Vet AU || Magical Realism, Horses, Vet John, Horse Sherlock, Implied Alcoholism) – Invalided after a run in with a poacher in Siberia, veterinary surgeon John Watson finds it difficult to acclimatize to the mundanity of London life. Things change when a friend invites him along to a local animal shelter and he meets their latest acquisition, a trouble-making Frisian with the strangest eyes and even stranger quirks John has ever encountered in a horse.

A Fold in the Universe by darkest_bird (E, 152,869 w., 26 Ch. || Omegaverse / Prime Universe Crossover || OmegaJohn / AlphaSherlock, First Kiss / Time, Friends to Lovers, Established Relationship, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Dubious Consent, Humour) – Alpha Sherlock and Omega John are in a relationship. Prime Sherlock and Prime John are not. So what happens when a freak fold in the universe switches one John for the other?

Proving A Point by elldotsee & J_Baillier (E, 186,270 w., 28 Ch. || Me Before You Fusion || Medical Realism, Insecure John, Depression, Romance, Angst, POV John, Sherlock Whump, Serious Illness, Doctor John, Injury Recovery, Assisted Suicide, Sherlock’s Violin, Awkward Sexual Situations, Alcoholism, Drugs, Idiots in Love, Slow Burn, Body Image, Friends to Lovers, Hurt / Comfort, Pain, Big Brother Mycroft, Intimacy, Anxiety, PTSD, Family Issues, Psychological Trauma, John Whump, Case Fics, Loneliness, Pain) – Invalided home from Afghanistan, running out of funds and convinced that his surgical career is over, John Watson accepts a mysterious job offer to provide care and companionship for a disabled person. Little does he know how much hangs in the balance of his performance as he settles into his new life at Musgrave Court.

[voidcat]

anwyays little psa bc ive gained new followers w windbreaker etc stuff recently (and noticed ups and downs w my follower count)

for a year or so my activity has been on and off. honestly i shouldnt have to explain to anyone the reasoning why lol bc its the creators life at the end of the day adn they dont owe anything to anyone but anywys ill try to keep it short and explain nicely

writing takes time. more than you might think it does. i'll write a quick drabble and think "wow got this out quickly" and realize i worked on it for 2 hours. minimum. and thats without grammar checking etc and preparing a post format and everything

as writers, artists, creators we each have our own lives, responsibilities and priorities. we are not a machine. we are people with souls and personalities. so next time youre goingto unfollow someone for lack of content in recent, think of this.

and besides that honestly for me, the tumblr experience has always been following someone for themselves, not just their content. i havent touched bnha in years, nor tokrev, i never watched blue lock and i never finished [insert popular anime] does this stop me from following the same person, enjoying their posts and bloggings? no. and why should it? take a break from consumerism once in a while and enjoy life, enjoy people for who they are! take a deep breath, go drink a glass of water, go touch grass if needed idk.. keep in mind that people have feelings just like you, busy lives, busier schedules. heck you guys dont even know if im married or not, got kids or no, i legit started being open abt my line of job recently and Still im sure most of you dont know

my point being: you dont know what the other person carries, what lives they live and what they got going on behind the image of their blog. emphasize with people once in a while. and if youre so desperate for [insert character] x reader [insert au and tropes] fic or art idk then go make it yourself and i say this with good intentions. its never too late to start new things. and writing words and writing a story are not the same things, it takes effort. same as drawing a line or a stick figure and making art of/for something. it takes time, effort, feelings...

if youve read this far, thank you<3 have a nice evening, ily

[captorcorp]

ok im rambling about my thoughts on tadc bc i have many (long post)

ok first of all general character opinions with walk cycle gifs to break up the walls of text (gifs from here):

caine: the silly guy... literally why red recommended this to me was the digital world setting + an ai character and they know me too well because every ai character is my favorite by default. i'm very excited to see what we end up learning about him throughout the series, also i absolutely love that he was inspired by AM from ihnmaims but 'if he was a silly little guy instead of fueled by hate' or whatever the creator said about him. his weird head design is really creative though it does discomfort me a bit sometimes, something about the combination of eyes and teeth;;; still think he's kinda tumblr sexyman coded besides the teeth head but most people are too distracted with objectifying jax so he gets a pass

pomni: she's cool!! it's hard to form a solid view of her so far bc most of what we've seen is her being understandably overwhelmed with and O.O at everything, but she seems like she'll be a pretty interesting protag - i liked them showing her moments of weakness with leaving ragatha behind too. that being said i think she stretched out the 'omg this isn't real what's going on???' freaking out bits way too long but that's just a personal gripe with that sorta stuff in media like this. if i was isekai'd into the digital circus i would simply be so chill about it after only 5 minutes of panic. rip to pomni but i'm different /j oh yeah also a fun character design even though i don't really like clowns she's just very Shaped

jax: motherfucker. jk i actually don't feel that strongly about him i just find him slightly annoying at times. at first i thought 'oh ok he's a loveable asshole yeah he's kinda entertaining so he's cool' and then he just ended up being more asshole than loveable. also thought he was sexyman coded and was unfortunately right this time ^^; apparently he's the creator's fave too?? so hopefully he doesn't get away with too much stuff without consequences, or he's gotta actually get some positive traits yknow. however i do love his design with the big grin and semicircle eyes and etc, very cartoony and fun. if the controversial blorbo poll was still open i would submit him bc it seems like the fandom is split on him. but also kinda tired of him from fandom overexposure

ragatha: she's really nice and i want to be her friend - looking forward to seeing where her character goes in the future though, bc we've only seen her being polite and forgiving and sweet and etc, and i think she should be allowed to kill people /hj. it was cool seeing her get glitched too even if ;-;. i was never into raggady ann stuff like i've heard the creator is but her design is still cute too, even if less surreal than some of the others ^^

bubble: keep forgetting this guy exists, not a huge fan tbh? gets some points for being another ai though. looks like a chain chomp. i do like that they're able to be popped and respawn though, that's a fun quirk. the scene with them cleaning up after pomni is p gross

kinger: i barely thought about this guy during the pilot tbh so was surprised to see the fandom all adoring him. kinda just reminds me of fear from inside out. but actually overexposure of him from tumblr and other people enjoying him kinda made him grow on me a bit (reverse of what has been happening w jax). he's pretty cool to me now. i can't believe fandom already gave him a tragic backstory with that queen chesspiece we see crossed out...

zooble: another character i didn't really think about, though i like their design and detachable body parts and such. i also couldn't really get a good sense of their personality tbh? i think they just need more screentime honestly

gangle: i wanted to like her a lot more than i did when i first saw her bc her design is very fun, with the ribbon-based body and comedy/tragedy masks and etc. but ended up not getting too interested in her as a character. but i think she's in the same category as zooble where she needs more screen time and character development though? bc she still seems like she could be cool if her personality gets explored more

thoughts on the overall pilot:

ngl i have a whole bunch of gripes about it despite also rotating it in my mind. i feel like a lot of the characters are a little 1-dimensional currently, even if i do find those dimensions appealing for the most part, hoping they get more characterization in the actual main season though. also most of the pacing/jokes didn't really land for me or felt a bit forced, though there were some good bits like king's hands following zooble's head, pomni opening doors to surreal scenes like the bathing mannequin, jax getting choked by zooble's hand, the randomly generated 5-letter names, also any of the cartoony imagery gags like the censor bars or cartoon dust cloud of gloinks.

however, overall i enjoyed it still!!! all of the animation has so much charm and character to it, surreal semi-human character designs are always great, it's very colorful and bright and reminiscent of old early 2000s activity center games, etc. it gives me kinda 'welcome home' vibes, with both being bright and cheery exteriors meant to mimic old media style that mask darker stuff under the surface. also the general plot of like. people being trapped in this weird setting and forced to participate in fucked up (?) games by some mysterious mastermind (well we know who the mastermind is but not much about him) while struggling to escape or understand why they've been trapped here... very common plot but always is intriguing to me. also of course [holds digital worlds and ais in my hands] my beloved tropes...

thoughts on the fandom:

i am. concerned. that there seems to be an overlap with the h*zb*n h*t*l fandom;; but also i don't know anything about that show's status besides like. callout posts about the creator and people complaining about the pacing/character designs and etc. so i don't really know if all of the hh fans is bc it's like, also an animated series that appeals to the same audience? or if it's going to be too similar or inspired from it or also have a problematic creator somehow 😔

otherwise it's whatever, maybe a bit on the :I side bc i already saw someone make a y*nd*r* jax imagine post and it scared me hjkdfs. otherwise mostly just usual fandom stuff i think? dunno.

actually nevermind i just got back from twitter and apparently the creator is already feeling :/ about their own fandom and apparently people on tiktok are hcing some fucked up stuff about jax so. can fans be normal for 2 seconds please.

[7rashstar]

this ended up being way longer than expected so i’m putting it under the cut ~

i miss getting tumblr anons/interacting w ppl on this site more. my old blog had almost 2k followers n i got them allllll the time. i had had that blog since 2015 tho and only stopped using it once i made this one, (after being off the net for. a long while) this is the only social media site i wanna use. i mostly just post and ghost though, barely scrolling the dash. i miss being more interactive with mutuals

i partially abandoned that blog because i felt like there were too many eyes on me 😵‍💫 the other part was bc i was really deep in addiction, and on top of all that i had some major creepy anonymous stalkers

i’ve been thinking abt making more diary oriented posts lately bc the weathers been whack n i’m not rly going on walks bc of that, i’ve also been pretty much a full time hermit since new years. i could prolly count on both (if not one) hand how many times i’ve seen my friends. i think this has been a good thing for me though,,,been having a personal renascence the past couple months. drawing every day, playing guitar and making mewsic etc etc

also thinking abt utilizing side blogs again. maybe make one for my drawings. i drew a couple pages of a comic i wanna work on more. mostly oc art and some photo collages.

i also wanna start posting my music. soundcloud or youtube or both. maybe make some vlogs too? part of the reason why i haven’t is because nothing feels finished, but i’ve realized i used to use my old soundcloud to track my progress creating on ableton when i first got it and had no idea how to use the program. coming to terms with nothing needing to be perfect, bc it’ll never get to that ‘perfectly finished’ point. it’s earnest and from my heart as it is. i do think i should start saving up for a new laptop though, mine is pretty old and laggy. i might jus try ripping everything to an external hard drive to clear up space n see if that helps…but a fresh start would also be nice. (plus i haven’t updated my mac since mojave because it would break ableton lol)

i finallllllly saved up and bought a new phone tho. it’s the same one i have right now but it’s from ebay certified refurbished so i feel pretty good abt it. hopefully it’ll come tomorroww, this one is starting to rly shit out on me. my alarms didn’t even go off this morning 😭 ended up being late to work

i miss going to shows a lot and hanging out w ppl. i think i’m finally starting to come back out of my shell, even jus a little bit.

might boot up my pc tonight and upload some stuff (but not holding myself to that lol) i found all of the old SD cards and some flash drives from my youth and some of the pictures are absolute gems

anywayyy long asf post lol but yea!! i hope everyone is doing ok

much loveeee <33

[hebimoonlightwrites]

hello there dear! i’m new to tumblr, and i never knew there were such sweet people like you writing wonderful scenarios w/ hypnosis mic characters for everyone! as i was reading through your content, i could tell through your writing that you are very passionate about writing, and you seem like a very kind individual!

i really liked the kind of request that neru-anon requested, i hope its ok if i try this as well! ill try to keep everything brief, as im not a super interesting person to begin with- Σ੧(❛□❛✿)

my name is ryusei, which contains the kanji for flow, 流 and star, 星. i go by she/they (whichever is fine!) and i’m currently 20, and studying music and psychology! im a rather quiet person, but i’ll always be willing to lend an ear if anyone wants to chat/vent! i’m very overprotective in a way thats not too conspicuous, and very loyal to anyone who calls me their friend. in contrast to that, i can hold myself well in a fight, and i’m surprisingly physically strong, but just get tired super quickly… (my stamina is… well… not good) i like smiling, but it’s difficult to express my facial emotions well, so i usually wear a mask in public. i’m an adaptable person, but i get overwhelmed easily, especially when there are too many numbers… i have asd, bpd, and ocd, and there was a point in my teenage years where that severely impacted my social life and academics, so i always like to keep my guard up, but i like to talk a lot so i end up saying too much sometimes-! i have a couple friends, but i’m not a “people person” i guess.

i enjoy listening to a wide range of music and i really love artists like Atarashii Gakko!, 周深 (his voice is so soothing!), (G)I-DLE, Ichiko Aoba, vocaloid, and Hypmic music! you can check them out if you’d like, they’re all very talented musicians/singers!

i’d rather not go into my family affairs too much, as my parents don’t have a healthy relationship with each other which affected my brother and i, so we don’t talk much now. but my younger brother (as chaotic as he may be) is important to me.

i won’t go into my panic attacks too much as i know this topic may be triggering for some people, but they’re usually hard to spot, and people other than me usually can’t tell because of my quietness.

i really like cats! i’d like to own one myself in the future, maybe when i can take care of myself better ヽ(；▽；)ノ i visit cat cafes when i visit japan sometimes, although im not as fluent as a local, its enough for me to book time slots for cat cafes at least!

when i’m in a bad mood, i lash out and break down easily at people, so i have a tendency to self isolate sometimes.

i like… a lot of foods! i don’t like fruit, insects (both in food and in general),and extravagant stuff though… i like coffee with loads of sugar… haha… i dont get drunk easily but im not too fond of alcohol… maybe cocktails but not super bitter stuff. i can withstand smoke but i don’t smoke myself.

i don’t care too much about clothing, but i want to look presentable at least. i do like cute clothes, but i usually go with super minimalistic/vintage clothes.

i like kind people! i strive to be kind myself! i want to be able to mutually help each other with our problems! i have the power to be able to help others, and honestly helping other people is easier than figuring out what to do with my own problems. unconditional love is important to me. i have problems with self confidence, and i’m also pretty hard to read, so someone who could really understand that would be nice. my love language is… physical contact i think? i like hugging and jumping around and stuff, but i dont do that much cause im paranoid about bothering people. i like affection a lot!! i didn’t have a super affectionate family, but i like people who show they care through their actions (and sometimes maybe words?) i would honestly offer everything i have for someone who would genuinely love me, but i doubt even someone in the hypmic cast would be interested… (´；Д；`)

thank you for reading all this stuff hebi! please take care! its a bit late where i am, so i’m going to head to sleep. goodnight hebi! (_ _).｡o○

(sorry for any spelling errors TT)

Writer's corner: Hey, sweetheart! Thank you for requesting for this kind of request! I honestly really like playing Cupid's role, haha!♥ Of course the following is only mu thoughts and headcanons, so don't feel forced to think just like I do, okee~? Also, I don't know who are your favourite characters or if there's any you dislike qwq In case i chose one you don't like, please, text me so I can change him to the "second" or the "third" choice at the bottom of this post, okee? Plus, sweetheart, please let me know if there's any mistake♥ Enjoy~♥

Warnings: nothing~ safe here~

⭐𝐖𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐇𝐘𝐏𝐌𝐈𝐂 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬/𝐨⭐

⭐Hey, sweetheart! I'm thankful for all the sweet words you told me.. qwq♥ I'm so glad that you do enjoy my writings, as I always try to do my best. My main mission is to bring a smile to people's faces, so I do hope this will bring a smile to yours as well!♥

⭐First of all I wanted to tell you that you seem a nice and amazing person, so there's not really need to be that unconfident, especially when it comes to physical affection! It's true that there are people who are introverted and maybe against PDA (like me, oof..), but as an introverted I can tell that people like you- who likes affection, hugging, smiling- are very appreciated. You can literally cheer people around you up and this is so powerful!♥ As I read your description, I don't hide the fact that I immediately thought about Matenrou and Fling Posse bois; On one hand things about you like studying psychology, being kind of unconfident, dreaming about getting some physical affection, getting easily overwhelmed and getting silent panic attacks really made me think about Matenrou and, in particular, about Doppo somehow..♥ On the other hand things like wearing minimalistic/vintage cute clothes, enjoying music, liking affection and jumping around, being a good listener, liking cats and being actually a trustful and loyal friend made me think about Fling Posse and their friendship, but especially to Gentaro and Ramuda, somehow♥ The fact that you do care a lot about your brother, the fact that you prefer helping others and try your best to be a good person, and especially, though, the fact that you are unconfident or maybe simply do not realize how nice you truly are.. well.. These things really bring me to think that you could kin Doppo- along with Gentaro and Ramuda-, somehow! BUT, we are here to find your other-half, and this isn't surely Doppo, since I do believe he is not that type of man pro to PDA and gets easily flustered.. (but.. who knows? He could get a crush on you~). Plus he's 29, so... ugh.. I know age isn't important in a couple and that love can be for everyone, but we need someone more...! We need someone who would be there for you, who would easily understand you- since you specifically said that you're "hard to be read"- and who's going to love you unconditionally. Someone who would show his affection towards you without any hesitation and problem! Someone who has interests similar to yours maybe.. who does enjoy music a lot, who enjoy food and who's protective of the ones he holds dear! Someone who can understad you fully and maybe even being that good of a partner who'd be able to get the moment when you're silently having a panic attack..

⭐..Okay.. I got my results~

⭐So.. (unless you don't like gambling..).. I feel like Dice would be a perfect first choice! We're literally talking about someone who seems dumb as f##, but it's canon that he has some serious and deep thinking moments, especially when he's alone. He looks dumb, but he's not at all. Just like you, Dice does enjoy music, as he tries to create some using "instruments" like grass or empty cans- even if it's said that he can play piano and violin, oof. Just like you, he does care a lot about his friends and he's even protective of the ones he holds dear. Dice loves his friends unconditionally- even if some could think that he's Gentaro's friend because he owes him money, Dice does actually care about him too. Plus, if he gamble, that means that he has a "not-toxic" relationship with numbers! (jk, Ryusei♥ *hugs*)

⭐So I'm sure that through his energetic and dumb-apparent look, he would be the best of a partner for you! You with your stable-life and him with his risky-life would be the perfect yin and yang. I can already imagine him randomly hugging you or simply poking your face as he notices that your mind is overthinking.. he would get that maybe you're starting to panic silently and would whisper: "Hey... u okay?", with a reassuring smile. After meeting your eyes he would simply open his arms to hug you, especially if he's certain that you need affection. Dice would try his best to cheer you up, especially when he feels like you're having a "no"-day. I can even imagine you both petting stray cats or him visiting you and holding one of your school books like: "Daaaaamn.. how can you even understand all of this?!.. It feels like blabbering!", playing the fool part only to make you chuckle. Even so, he would show how proud he is of you and how much he does really admire you. "How can you be so smart to understand that blabbering?!", Dice would exclaim only to hear your chuckle again. "I.. I like your chuckle, y'know? It's.. cute.."

⭐About the others Fling Posse's and Matenrou's members, well.. ⭐Jakurai: He could be a kind uncle/father to you. Since he's a doctor he could really take care of your "no"-moments, even also hugging you, why not? Plus I'm 100% sure he would be so proud of you for studying psychology! You're going to be one of his work colleague, one of the most amazing one, actually!♥ ⭐Hifumi: Except for those times his fear for women would be evident, he would show his support to you just as much as he does with Doppo! Hifumi is a kind-hearted man so he'd be energetic enough to drive you to be the same and you both would be great friends for sure! After some time, though, I think he would start to learn to "read" you, because he already did it with Doppo~♥ ⭐Doppo: I feel like you could kin him, as I said before. Doppo is the one who paradoxically would tell you stuff like "W-what?! But.. you're amazing, Ryusei! Don't you ever think otherwise. You cannot understand how great you are?!".. I mean.. bruh, you're just like her! But I feel like he would even usually vent in your presence or inviting you to get some coffee together, why not?♥ ⭐Ramuda: Oh... ohhh. Ramuda would be the best at showing his affection towards you, especially now that you're officially a posse~! He would jump around and hug you randomly, but I feel like you would also be there noticing his "no"-moments too♥ ⭐Gentaro: You would have a calm but intellectual relationship with him. Both of you would go to the café, wearing vintage clothes and I feel like Gentaro would appreciate your company, as your dressing style seems similar to his one. He's also a good listener, just like you, so I feel like you could even take a chance to talk to him. He would give you his "honest" advices... oof♥

Top three results:

⭐1- Dice

⭐2- Ramuda

⭐3-Doppo

©hebimoonlightwrites_tumblr Please, do not copy my contents nor repost it without my permission.

[moonjxsung]

hi star my little moonlit angel 😔💖💖

aa im having like the most stressful week and idk where to talk abt it so i hope you dont mind me dumping for a sec :((

exams are killing me rn and idk if its finals week or my final week cs holy shit i am dying 😭😭

ive been pulling all nighters trying to get all my projects and group studies done and my exams are DEF not helping in my case and idk if ive even been eating properly there's probably a spoiled banana from last week in my bag somewhere atp 🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️ (im going mentally insane)

i havent even properly been on tumblr in a while and my social media is blowing up w notifs and dms from friends and ive been too busy to check it either tbh

honestly im hoping itll all turn out well by next week cs is my winter break 🤧

on another note i wanted to dump on my exes when all your anons were doing it but i was too scared to but now i genuinely need to tell u abt this because umm

my fwb is like a super nice guy and ive been friends w him for a while but i recently found out hes rlly good friends with one of my exes ⁉️

basically i asked (my ex) out once and he said yes and i thought we were chill but a few friends ended up asking him if we were dating like two days later without asking me for confirmation first and he said no.. (??)

i assumed he js didnt want like a too public relationship with everyone knowing so to clarify i asked him what was up and he said he ended up having second thoughts on me because his friends called me a red flag and he doesnt like the fact that i have guy friends and im close with them.... (💀💀)

so then i said oh okay..? 😭 and was over it but almost a month later he asked me out and atp he just gave me the icks so i made an excuse saying that i wanna focus on academics and not do anything relationship wise and he said he would wait 😭😭 (he in fact did not pick up the hint!)

then a little over month later he asked me out AGAIN and i said no i dont think i like you anymore sorry and he said oh that's fine and i thought we were chill??

a week later my messages BLEW UP one day and my guy friends were all snitching on him telling me that he's gong around slutshaming me and talking shit abt me for no reason and he said i was desperate and asked him out 3 times when he said no and he was never interested in me in the first place.. and then proceeded to sexualize my body and say weird ass shit abt it to everyone and they believed that i was a desperate whore or smth 😭

this happened a year ago but i was walking down the halls around a month ago and i saw him with his friends so i just rushed past

and his friends were like "oh isnt that the bitch who liked you?" and i heard him say "oh yeah she liked me like a year ago" and then proceeded to sexualize me while i was right fucking there but i dont even want any more drama w him so i dont bother saying anything back or leaking messages or wtv i js hope karma gets back at him 😭

and now idk if i should tell my fwb abt this?? or maybe it doesnt really concern me but it bothers me that hes hanging out with a guy like that and im conflicted on what to do

its not like i have the right to tell him who to be friends with either so 🤷‍♀️

what should i dooo

-《as always, your occasionally appearing but always stalking ☘ annonie》

(p.s. do you have any spotify song reccomendations 🥺🥺)

much lovee

Pooooookie you can always vent here ily ily :(

I’m so sorry to hear you’re stressed from exams :(( I’m rooting for you okay !! Please make sure to eat whenever you can (even if it’s something small!) and stay hydrated :( what’s the use of doing good on finals if your body gives out on you :(

No I feel u on the social media thing I get SO stressed when I have DMs or texts or whatever I just flat out don’t check them. I think I have 200 unread texts rn (it’s been around 1000 at some point) and I know im such a shitty friend but I just cannot respond to them 😭😭 I gotta put me first you guys

WINTER BREAK NEXT WEEK THOOO hang in there baby it’ll get better soon 🥺🫶🫶🫶🫶

OH MY GOD???? Pookie that’s fucking disgusting I’m so sorry you’re dealing with men like that rn???? I had a veryyyy similar situation with a guy who my friend tried to set me up with at a party who kinda liked for a little bit and then when I said I was comfortable being in a relationship he started slutshaming me to everyone under the fucking SUN and apparently he had a discord group where I was just CONSTANTLY the topic of conversation and when I heard about it I cried so hard ☹️ in my case I also had people who were friends with him and I voiced to them that it made me severely uncomfortable. Like the people in my life should know about the people who wronged me (especially if I’m sleeping with them??) and it just made me feel safer. It’s obviously up to you but I would probably tell him just so that he knows that’s someone you’re weary about and you don’t feel safe around ☹️ your safety and your wellbeing is the most important thing pookie ☹️ keep me posted if you need anything at all okay I love you lots and I’m sorry you’re going through this ☹️🫶

Song recs song recs yes here are some I’ve been listening to on repeat all week (there’s only like one kpop song in there but it’s my fav kpop song of all time so TRUST it was gonna make it to the list) I’ve been listening to Glass Animals, TV Girl and M83 on repeat for the entire year I think 😭😭

I love you endlessly okay keep you chin up better days are coming for us !! 🫶🫶🫶🫶 soon it’ll be winter break and you can just sit back and drink hot chocolate and tell me all about it and say you lived through it. Hang in there my love

[arbustorum]

What helps you break from sameface syndrome in art?

i know ive heard the phrase but i honestly dont think ive ever actually took at that seriously or cared about it all. The only time i remember thinking about it was getting the compliment that was like "its like you have the opposite of same face syndrome" and i still didnt really get it. So sorry if this is a long response that doesnt help at all but ur getting my essay because this stuff bothers me.

first time i saw it used in a way i think makes sense was back when i saw the frozen critique thing going around tumblr. They literally have the same face as each other, the main characters, and as their mother, but male characters NEVER have this issue, in the SAME media(show, movie, w/e). My solution to that is just simply...stop designing your women the same. If you need to, design a male char and then sex bend it trying to change as little as possible and see if that helps you notice how ur accidentally limiting yourself for your women. Most of the time the problem isnt "same face", its that we dont give women the same depth of expression and variety of design. whole other essay but yeah...

In that similar vein. Same face feels like a...way to avoid calling it sexism to me in the art. It then is used by all artists to just find a way to shit on art styles without actually providing useful critique. "Same face" is actually quite beloved and marketable.

Simplistic designs could be called "same face" which belittles the fact that designing minimalistic and aesthetically pleasing designs is quite difficult. These designs are distinct, recognizable, and very beloved. They are cute and nice to look at! These are actually so well designed i hesitate to call them same face but i wanna try and show the "two dot eyes and a mouth and dot nose" could be called same face. But with limited elements, each face is actually clearly distinct. Even the twin guys lala and kiki, (altho if u make them both smile and they wouldnt be but u get it)

Another minimalistic design that relies heavily on minute differences in the face(as well as other elements of the design) to distinguish them.

i like these examples because perhaps the average tumblrina might agree that everyone thinks sanrio looks good, and might say they dislike homestucks style, but they use similar design rules.

here is another example of a style some might just consider ugly or lacking skill(im a personal fan and dont agree but hopefully u get what i mean). A distinct part of his style is making every character have distinct eyes. probably for the same reason i find mobpsycho 100 and homestuck styles charming and pleasing, they cannot be accused of sameface(atleast not to me ill come for you LOL). This may be a kind of fundamental reason i dont struggle with it, im a particular fan of this method of design. It just is a part i focus on. it was never a concious choice i made as an artist.

Some artists find different elements pleasing or enjoyable to draw, and same face is actually quite beloved(and marketable) its not the end all be all design rule is my point... examples of beloved styles where its quite easy to switch the faces around and it may become difficult to tell it has occurred.

heres another style people consider ugly but doesn't have same face(again, im a fan, so it really might just be a thing i like in art, also yes the women are more similar but this rule does still apply to his women...just with much less variation :\ see again my original "same face obscures sexist design choices" point)

so yeah TL;DR i dont believe in same face as a fundamental design flaw, you should draw whatever you like and improve things you are personally dissatisfied with.

TL;DR 2 (ACTUALLY ANSWERING THE QUESTION) "i want more variation in faces when i design" treat eyes, noses, lips, forehead height, face shape, chin, eyebrows, eyes, hair coverage, moles, freckles, dimples, cheek bones...(and whatever else you can think of) as all different elements and include more variation of them. experiment.

im not a professional i am self taught and just some lady these are just my observations and opinions.

[mochidreambubble]

Scarlet Hollow ask game

Tagged by @cymatile AND @georgiedoesntfloat 🖤TYSM for always including me in these haha

I'll offer up two variants for some of the answers, using my main OC file (Ashe my beloved) and my 2nd one that I use to mess around (Atlas who I have mentioned like... Once-)

TRAITS:

Your "canon" trait combination? Ashe: Mystical/Hot. I will take any chance I get to use my attractive OC son- (2nd best to go option tho via) Atlas (maybe I just like 'A' names lol): Mystical/Street Smarts. Let me break all the rules and lie my way thru everything pls- (basically, I like it if it can help me socially and Street Smarts has its perks there too haha)

What third trait would you add for hardcore mode? For Ashe I'm tied between Talk to Animals and Street Smart. Animals to go down the full something is definitely up with him kind of vibe vs the one he'll actually likely have due to his personality/bad boy roots lmao. Atlas gets Book Smart, to be deceptively like the type where he doesn't look it.

What trait are you least drawn to? Powerful Build. Strong? My vain bb Ashe who would never chip a nail? I promise you if he looks like he has muscle it's purely for show lol. And Atlas is a stick. Aside from achievement hunting, I'm also just not down to throwing hands/go for physical strength to solve my problems haha. Nice if you want your MC to lean more to himbo if you pair w/ hot, but if not for that then nah :p

Coolest trait? Mystical. I know I'm not alone on this haha. Aside from enjoying lore and slapping it on almost all my runs for my OC army, I feel like it fits best for SH's setting.

ROMANCE:

Who are you romancing? Reese for Ashe and Wayne for Atlas (me slapping the two Monster Lover achievements like DO YOU SEE THESE)

What romance are you least interested in? Dr Kelly. I do not hate her per say, I am just emotionally reactive to the *motions to the whole revelations of Episode 4*

Who would you romance if every single character was eligible? Isaacs or Harrison, likely? Like, I know Bo is a popular choice and I do like him, but considering it's 50/50 if he loses his dad, I wanna give the poor guys space to grieve first cause he's a sweet fellow.

MISCELLANEOUS:

What character would hurt you the most if something bad happened to them? Not including Reese who I am deeply hoping is ok on the endings where he's still breathing, I gotta say Kaneeka and Tabitha. For Tabby, I'd put my MC thru hell if I have to (and I legit yelled when she choose to take on those years the first time I played Episode 3 like Tabby NO I'LL DO IT PLS); for Kaneeka, god her whole situation is just shitty I just want the best from her and someplace that she can go very far from her mom p l s I will cry if something happens to her-

Would you stay in Scarlet Hollow when the week is over? It's too early to say. Very likely no because SH rn doesn't strike me like it will let you burn the root of whatever looms and haunts over the holler. If anything, I wanna drag people OUT of Scarlet Hollow by week's end.

Who would you vote for dog mayor? Scraps. I trust Gretchen and I just think Scraps is cool.

Tagging: no one, my SH Tumblr circle is so small anyone I would have thought of tagging has already been tagged on another person's post 😂

[hopelesslyinlovegirl]

A self reflexion on relationships.

Many of my texts are introduced the same way. I know it seems repetitive, but I swear, inspiration comes at me in the worst times (when I have importants exams and I must study)

Tomorrow I have a mathematics exam. I have to study, a bunch.

But I can´t help but feel to put this thoughts in one of my tumblr texts.

The guy that was pursuing me broke up with me yesterday. What messed up most with my head were his contradictions and his lies.

He told me that he was thinking about this for a few days. But yesterday told me he would like to have intimacy and give me kisses and an hour later told me that in reality he didn´t want that, that he felt like neither of us was "ready for commitment".

I was pissed. And sad, of course. Because this situation used to be just part of my overthinking. Now that it happened, in all my next relationships I will feel that they are lying all the time. They will dump me when I don´t give them the one thing they want.

I felt like that barbie doll that you used from time to time. You know, the one that wasn´t your predilect doll but was there. When you needed it for some of your doll plots, she got out of the bottom of the box.

And you styled her. You dressed her with nice clothes. You washed and brushed her hair. And she´d play her part. Today, maybe she could be the love interest of that only ken that you had. The nice one.

But at the end of the day, she would end up again in the box. And she wouldn´t get out the next time you played with barbies. She´d simply be there. At the bottom of the box, forgotten, collecting dust, the hair looking dirty again. Because you don´t need her. She´s not your priority, never. And also is not the first choice.

Have you ever wondered, perhaps, that sometimes men and society treat women like those barbies?

He treated me like that barbie, because he felt that "i wasn´t for him", and he was "so so sorry" because "you are nice and i feel pity that you aren´t just for me" "someone will arrive that feels that you are their one woman"

And, okay. I felt so mad at that.

First of all, I don´t want his pity nor his sympathy. I felt so pathetic feeling like he pitied me. I understand it, though, because I was a crying mess yesterday. But I don´t need it. I need him to beg me to come back when he understands that he´s the problem.

Oh my god, this is so all too well (10 min version) coded. He did break me like a promise, being cruel in the name of being honest. Listen to that after this text.

Because he isn´t nice. He´s an asshole that goes up to women not knowing what he wants. He´s looking for love not knowing what love is.

Love is something you construct. Not something that just "happens". When idealization is over, that´s when love starts. When you choose if you want to spend your energy and time building a relationship. I never got after that part.

He projected onto me his own incapacity to mantain romantic relationships with women, saying "none of us is ready".

I was ready, because unlike him, I do know what I want. I know what love is. I´m smarter.

In the end, he wasn´t the one. It hurt me, but it is what it is.

The thing that breaks me is that some other girl is going to go through this. Because, obviously, he´s a man.

Do you think he really cares?

But again, girlie, if you are going through it here´s some advice: is not that you aren´t pretty enough or not good enough. You are Barbie. You are everything. He? He´s just ken. A ken that unlike Barbie´s boyfriend, is an ass and doesn´t know about the significance of love.

Some day, you are going to find a Ken that´s supportive. That loves you and that wants to build that with you. That´s gonna be your one. One that he feels you are his one woman. The one that shatters his world.

About me, I´m a writer. I´ve condemmed myself the day that I decided that I am. My world will spiral into Pizarnik, Plath, Woolf, Bevouir. Into casual encounters and experiences that will inspire me to write.

I´m not the one that finds love in the end. I´m the one that goes before the one. The process woman. The thinker. The philosopher.

Too talkative and too niche.

That´s who I am. I was born that, I will die that. No man is interested in a woman whose main topic is the societal perceptions of intelligence, or how the ideas or good and bad are constructed.

A woman of intellectual and academical feminism.

No, I just prefer to have my girls and go for afternoon tea with them.

-----

Ciudad Autónoma de Buenos Aires, Argentina.

12/06/2023. 13:28.

856 words.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

i am def interested in coma fics, specifically ones where john is in a coma 👀

Hello Lovely!

Whee! I'm excited to share this long-awaited list with you! I've not many of my own recs, so I did a quick tag-search on my MFL list, so I added those as well. Hope y'all enjoy, and as always, friends, add any that you may have!

COMAS

See also:

Hospital Fics

Hospitals Pt 2

Giveaway Fic #9 - Angsty Sick Fic/Sherlock is Sick by ConsultingPurplePants (T, 1,734 w., 1 Ch. || Sick Fic, Hypothermia) – The next time he awakens is even more chaotic. Two doctors are shouting at each other in the corner, and John is holding his hand so tightly Sherlock is worried he’ll break it. Part 9 of 1000 Tumblr Followers Giveaway Fics

A Room of One's Own by whitchry9 (K+, 2,174 w., 5 Ch. || S2 Timeline, Hurt/Comfort, Supernatural, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Coma, John Whump, Worried Sherlock, POV John, Angst, Friendship/Bromance, Hospital) – When a severe head injury lands John in a coma, somehow he ends up in Sherlock's mind palace. It's actually pretty nice there, and John is entertaining the notion of staying there, rather than returning to his broken body. But Sherlock isn't taking it as well, and John can feel him breaking around him.

The Deafening Silence by occasionally-maybe-never (T, 2,238 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, Major Character Death, Post-TRF) – 'Sherlock hopes fiercely that John can hear him, as sometimes coma patients can. He knows that John will understand, that his admission of love isn't a grand, sweeping romantic statement, but simply an expression of truth.' When Mycroft retrieves Sherlock to bring him home, it's not to John having dinner, but to John on his death bed.

As You Wish by PipMer (K, 3,311 w., 1 Ch. || Bromance/Pre-Slash/Epic Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, John Whump, Hospitals) – When John woke from his coma, he wasn't at all surprised to see the wrong Holmes brother sitting at his bedside. Disappointed, but not surprised. 

I See You Through by belovedmuerto (T, 12,078 w., 8 Ch. || Psychic AU || Empath John, Alternate TGG, Whump, Nightmares, Bedsharing, Slow Burn, Pre-Slash) – John has never asked Sherlock about his past, his childhood, the reason he quails in lonely misery almost every time he sees his brother. He’s never needed to. Part 2 of An Experiment in Empathy

I Think I've Come A Long Long Way To Sit Before You Here Today by ArwenKenobi (T, 18,251 w., 3 Ch. || Grief/Mourning, Passage of Time, Major Character Death, Alternating POV, Sherlock Whump, Pining Sherlock, Hospitalization, Coma, Revenge Murders, Hallucinations, Love Confessions, Brutal Accident, Mystrade, Ghost John) – One year after John is killed Sherlock starts to wonder whether John has actually gone anywhere.

Rupert Street by WritingOutLoud (M, 27,262 w., 9 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting || Case Fic, Sexuality, Demisexual Sherlock, Drugging, Smart John, Sherlock Has Internalized Biphobia, Fluff, Angst with Happy Ending, Gay Bar, Flirting, John Manipulates Sherlock to Eat, John Deduces, Arguments, Kidnapping/Torture, Hospitalization, John Whump) – Discharged from the war with nothing but the clothes on his back and a realisation of his bisexuality, John Watson has to learn who he’s become. He can’t afford London on an army pension, but the city is the only friend he has. In an effort to understand his newfound queer identity, he heads to a bar one night, where he stumbles across a mysterious stranger who turns his life upside down. ‘I dug around inside myself, and I'm not quite sure what I found, but it was beautiful and terrifying all at the same time.’

The Wisteria Tree by SilentAuror(E, 29,773 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S3, Emotional Love Making, Amnesia/Memory Loss, Sherlock Loves John So Much, Sherlock POV, Romance, Angst with Happy Ending, First Times, Hurt/Comfort, Est. Rel., Retirement) – Sherlock wakes up from a month-long coma only to discover that he has no memory of the previous six years to his own shock as well as John's...

Repairing the Broken Things by BakerTumblings (M, 75,252 w., 15 Ch. || S4 Compliant, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Medical Trauma, Hospitals, Big Brother Mycroft, Misunderstandings, Realizations, Severe Accident, John Whump, Pneumonia, Medical Procedures, Bed Sharing, First Time, Healing, Happy Ending) – "I'm calling today to notify you that there's been an accident."

Being John Watson-ish by elwinglyre (E, 69,902 w., 17 Ch. || Bodysnatcher AU || Author John, Cranky Sherlock, Angst, Sexual Tension, First Kiss / Time, Falling in Love, BAMF John, Past Soldier John, Feelings, Inside Someone’s Brain, Shy Sherlock, Sherlock Loves John, POV Sherlock, Switchlock, Slow Burn, Internal Dialogue, Mental Turmoil) – When consulting detective Sherlock Holmes steps on one toe too many at a crime scene, he's consigned to a desk job in an archaic office on the seventh-and-a-half floor of the New Scotland Yard. It’s in this bleak office that Sherlock discovers a portal into the mind of renowned author John Watson. Grander than his mind palace, this new wonderland affords Sherlock new vistas of experimentation. To learn more about the mystery behind the portal, Sherlock seeks out and befriends Watson. But then it all goes wrong when others find the secret portal door—including the man whose brain he visits.

The Lost Special: Family Matters (As Do Relationships) by  ShirleyCarlton (M, 144,688 w., 40 Ch. || S4 Fix It Fic / Meta Fic, Unreliable Narrator, John’s Mind Bungalow, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Demisexual Sherlock, Holmes Family, John Whump, Gay Mycroft, Misunderstandings, Drug Addiction, Parenting, TFP is a Nightmare, Virgin Sherlock, Slow Burn, Minor Character Death, Switchlock, John’s Past, Sherlock’s Past, Eurus, Love Confessions) –Sherrinford is not really the name of some high security prison. That was just a figment of John’s frantic coma dream. And Eurus is not actually Sherlock’s sister. That’s just something random she said to John before shooting him. Sherlock and John were never actually estranged. That was just their act to cover up what really happened to Mary – or Rosamund Moran, as her real name has turned out to be. Sherlock does have a secret sibling, though, and his name is Sherrinford. After finally eliminating Moran – though in a rather dramatically different way than they had envisioned – and exposing the truth about Eurus, John encourages Sherlock to delve into his past and to find out whether the reasons to keep Sherrinford away from Sherlock were the right ones, and to discover what really happened in 1981. Along the way, Sherlock and John gradually, finally, stop keeping each other at a distance, and eventually become a proper family of their own.

MARKED FOR LATER

Awake by greymantledlady (G, 2,178 w., 1 Ch. || Pilotverse || UAP ASiP Fix It, Dreams and Nightmares, Dreams vs. Reality, Hospital Love Confessions, Getting Together, Awkward John, Coma Dream, Sick Fic) – Pilotverse fix-it in which Sherlock is initially in a coma and the events of S1-4 are a kind of lucid dream. Also, hospital confessions, clearing the air, soft pilotverse Sherlock and John, and John Not Hitting Sherlock.

Fugue (n.) by reyiosa (NR [G], 3,281 w., 1 Ch. || Alternate Universe || Post-TRF, Hospital, Hallucinations, Coma, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, It Was All A Dream) – A Sherlock AU were it turns out Sherlock has made up his whole life with John as a consulting detective while stuck in a coma caused by an overdose. The real John is just a kind doctor at the hospital that sits by Sherlock’s bed and reads him detective stories.

The A.G.R.A. Complex by SilentAuror (E, 19,563 w., 1 Ch. || Freebatch RPF || Brain Injury, Reality/Sherlock Crossover, Altered Perceptions, Angst, Motorcycle Accident, Sherlock is a Coma-Dream, Martin POV) – Martin Freeman wakes from a brief coma during which he dreamed the entire Sherlock series. As he recovers from his brain injuries, he has trouble distinguishing between reality and the Sherlock universe in his dream. This impacts his relationships with both Amanda, whom he cannot stop seeing as A.G.R.A., and his friend and sometime colleague Benedict, who is Sherlock to his John. Part 1 of The A.G.R.A. Complex

Whenever it's right (AKA First Date) by Aliea (M, 26,493 w., 15/? Ch. || WiP || London Underground, Explosions, Doctor John, Sherlock Whump, Angst, Hospitals, Mind Palace John, Coma, Past Drug Use, Big Brother Mycroft) – Meeting the person you have been searching for all your life, never knowing that you have been searching until its over and you have them before you. What happens when you fall in love at first sight then everything goes to hell? Do you stay or go, take the risk or run for the hills. John has has never ran from anything, so he wasnt going to run from the man that changed his life in less than five seconds.

Where The Ghosts Have Voices by HappyJuicyfruit (M, 37,691 w., 12 Ch. || Supernatural AU || Ghosts, Magical Realism, Light Horror, Fluff and Smut, John Can See Ghosts, John Whump, Emotional Manipulation, Dark Magic, Coma, Injury Recovery, Blow Jobs, Anal, Happy Ending, John’s Past, Mr Holmes, Powerful John, Holmes Brothers, Sherlock’s Past, Past Viclock, Drug Abuse, Hair Pulling) – John has lived his whole life as an outcast. It is only when he meets Sherlock, that be realizes being a freak might not be such a bad thing, and that the curse he has lived with his whole life may be a gift after all.

Having Your Cake by SilentAuror (E, 44,615 w., 1 Ch. || Freebatch RPF || POV Martin, Open Infidelity, HLV/TAB Filming, Jealousy, Angst, Drama, Hotel Sex, Twitter) – Set four years after Martin's temporary brain injury that caused his universe to shift between reality and his coma dream of the Sherlock universe, Martin's history with Benedict comes back to haunt them both as they attempt to make sense of the relationship between their characters during the filming of His Last Vow. They are forced to face the question of whether they're interpreting the scripts objectively or are biased because of their personal history. As Martin deals with the difficulty of separating real life from fiction, he also has to make a decision that will affect the rest of his life as he knows it. Part 2 of The A.G.R.A. Complex

NO! by Tildathings (M, 50,043 w., 36 Ch. || Homophobia, Bed Sharing, Military Uniforms, Past Abuse, Jealous John, Stalking, Violence, First Kiss/Time, Fluff, Pillow Talk, Coming Out, Sherlock’s Past, Shower, Cuddling, Grief and Sorrow, Hugs, Character Death) – Sherlock has been in a coma in over 8 months after he overdosed on the plane at TAB, during which time Mary and Rosie were killed by Vivian Norbury.  This story starts 3 weeks after Sherlock has woken up. John is asking to move back to Baker Street.

In Absentia by SeaweedWrites (T, 79,273 w., 39 Ch. || TRF Divergence, Major Character Injury, Hurt/Comfort, Medical Realism, Car Accident, Traumatic Brain Injury, Hospital, Sherlock in a Coma, Physical/Psychological Rehab, Sensory Issues, Heavy Angst, Drama, Sherlock Whump, Biog Brother Mycroft, Depression, Nightmares, Panic Attacks) – Sherlock sends John a mysterious text. While John waits for Sherlock to come back to 221B to explain, Sherlock is involved in a terrible car crash, and everyone's lives are irrecoverably changed. Will Sherlock survive? And the bigger question for John- If he does survive, will he ever be the same? Part 1 of the In Absentia Fics and Information

Out There by DiscordantWords (T, 131,695 w., 10 Ch. || X-Files Fusion || Slow Burn, UST, Case Fic, Government Conspiracy, Aliens, UFOs, Mutants, Mutual Pining, First Kiss, Coma) – FBI Special Agent John Watson, medical doctor and army veteran, is assigned to assist eccentric genius Sherlock Holmes with paranormal investigations on the X-Files project.

[myescapediary]

Another update:

I decide to update my tumblr whenever i’m really sad and cant process what im feeing or thinking so this might be type long so ill break it down. where do I even start?? Its been two months and four days since I came on here. Based off my last update um...

RU update:

there is five weeks left of the semester!! Crazy how fast time flew by, its been ok haven’t make friends tbh but hopefully next semester is different. I am nervous about finals and I still haven’t paid off my tuition.. I also have my internship placement interview that I am so nervous about. I hope i do good and i am just so excited and scared at the same time. 

New job: 

I got a job!! I work at a Physical Therapy clinic and its been good so far, way different from my last job. Although i only work two days bcs of school, i am so ready to be full time once the semester is over. I am tired of not having money and i need to pay off my credit cards smh. 

Social Life: lmao might have to break this one down too... 

lets start of with Franco: that was a nice time, distanced myself bcs he was giving bf vibes and wanting a relationship, not what i want.. DV: um with this one.. said i was going to exchange my gifts and then cut him off.. well, his gifts are still sitting in my room LMAO! Idk whats going on with that, i just been avoiding him, he gives me an ick now... J: still around, it’s been really weird, idk why. He stood at my house for two days then his “girl” came to my house and confronted him about him staying here since he lied and she thinks i’m not in his life anymore, welp he went home the following day. He says he wants nothing w her but i’m sure he does, he prob just doesn’t want to be the first one to get into a relationship. Now lets talk about the one thats been taking a toll on me for no fucking reason... 

JZ, ok well from last update i seen him at esquina was awkward. Fast forward to 3/10, went to B’s bday party. Me and JZ spoke shit out like fr we kept it cool and it was nice getting the closure I needed, told him how i never wanted a relationship with him etc. I also mentioned how he blocked me from viewing his stories and him viewing mine. Mind you i’m not even that lit bcs i didn't want to do anything stupid since this is the first time being around him since brunch lmao. Night goes on, we dancing then i’m dancing on him cus why not and i notice he keeps staring at my lips and i eventually play dumb and let him kiss me =, first time i backed off second time we made out for like 2 seconds LMAO. Ok, i then let him be and distance myself, I notice B wants to get with him so i’m avoiding them although he isn't fully paying attention to her, fast forward, we end up getting kicked out and we going home. B is in the car w me asking for JZ and how she wants him to take her home and how he “kissed her”. ok anyways, he doesn’t take her home and she lied about that and he told everyone he only kissed me cool. I obv felt a type of way seeing them bcs idk why he got me feeling like this for him, when he doesn’t do shit bruh. Following day we go to Scarlet’s and B is with him and i was like great.. they was always together and i was lowkey hurt, why idk but I was. I just hoped she wasn’t going to NYC with us too.. 

Ok we go to NYC with the boys for St.Pattys day, its me ad libi and the guys from brunch... off the bat Jacob is being an asshole and bringing brunch up all the time, found out that I was crying for JZ that day of brunch like wtf?? ad to play it off like i remembered that LMAO. Ok, i avoid JZ all night then remembered the following day going up to him and my dumbass being drunk bringing up B to him talking about some, i’m not dumb you want her and he’s like no I want u and i’m like you’re not acting like it and thats all I remembered. He been watching my ig stories since B’s bday but idk my dumbass always does some dumb shit to push him off. I think its the thought of him not wanting me what kills me, like wtf? Following day all his boys said how they would get with me and how i’m bad like wtf let me heal you from your ex?? LMAOO JK. But that was another story, they prob think i’m easy after brunch but hell na, jacob was buggin and swears. Ok well that was on 3/18 and I haven’t seen him since. 

I am just driven by the fact he doesn’t want me ig? but then he goes kissing me and saying he wants me? is he that much of a bitch? like I don’t understand fr and me wanting answers makes me want him more and honestly he isn’t even that cute, well he is but like for me to be this “obsessed”. He def needs healing from his ex bcs he be liking sad shit and how he can’t trust females.. He is just such a cool person and his vibes are it, his style and the way he talks god. I don’t know what JZ did to me but he got me going through it without doing anything bruh. No need for me to feel this way. And the fact he knows i’m down bad for him prob gives him an ick and i see why but i try to avoid him and be cool but i fuck it up somehow. I clearly can’t drink when i’m around him. I just wished he was open to getting to know me and not making it weird. But yeah, that’s mainly what’s been making me upset,I was over the thought of him till i was around him for 2 weekends straight. They talking about NYC next weekend and staying over there, idk if he’s going and idk if B is going. If she goes that shit gonna blow mine but we’ll see. 

I should be doing homework but here’s me writing a whole book lol.

March 25, 2023 

4:19pm 

[pedrito-friskito]

the way we were / the way we are - masterlist

you met Bucky between the bookshelves. he stole your heart beneath starry skies. it was a match made in heaven, but fate had other plans.

(Bucky Barnes x reader fic; this story follows the general timeline of the MCU - with some obvious differences. I'm horrible at writing summaries, but essentially this encompasses all the versions of Bucky we all know from the movies and show: the all-American military man, The Winter Soldier, the semi-stable 100-year-old man, the White Wolf, and beyond. Reader becomes a variation of the super-soldier)

A/N: this fic is posted in full (incomplete right now) on ao3! link is here! I haven’t worked on it in a while but I am determined to finish it eventually. it was the first fic I ever posted online and what got me back into fanfiction and eventually lead me back to tumblr lol so be gentle! this is a fix-it fic (of sorts - I didn’t change everything)

warnings/notices: smut, fluff, falling in love, some chapters deal with Bucky’s PTSD/mental illness after being the Winter Soldier. all violence depicted is canon-typical for the most part, chapters will have warnings but if you can handle the MCU, you should be okay here!

there is use of y/n - it was all the rage when I started writing this LOL I might phase it out in future chapters but it’s sticking for the time being (if that’s not your jam, all my other fics/oneshots do NOT use y/n so check those out if you like!)

chapter titles are song lyrics - the updated spotify playlist is here.

*chapters w/ smut are marked w/ a “*”!!

chapters (chronologically by movie):

the first avenger:

1 - the first time ever I saw your face

2 - take this heart of gold and melt it down*

3 - I got soul but I’m not a soldier

4 - if I should go before you

5 - tell me where your heart is

6 - is there somebody who can watch you

7 - when you hear my voice, when you say my name*

8 - these days are numbered

the avengers:

9 - this world is not my home

the winter soldier:

10 - back in my body

11 - how many times can I break till I shatter

12 - what am I here for

age of ultron:

13 - when the night is over

14 - nothing left for you

civil war:

15 - way down we go

16 - judgement day*

17 - you can never break the chain

18 - nobody teaches you to hurt like this

19 - sad, beautiful, tragic

20 - whatever helps you sleep at night

infinity war:

21 - I could use somebody

22 - when it feels like this

23 - make this go on forever

24 - if we had five more minutes

25 - do you want to die together?

endgame:

26 - but I’m forever missing him (and you caused it)

27 - are you really gonna love me when I’m gone?

28 - okay, fine, maybe I’m just a little nostalgic

29 - every night I’m dancing with your ghost

30 - taking care of soulfight

31 - soldier, poet, king

32 - home is wherever I’m with you

33 - you’re the one who breaks my heart right

the falcon and the winter soldier:

34 - I think I’ve seen this film before and I didn’t like the ending

35 - give me a minute to hold my girl

36 - it’s not easy to be me

37 - I try to be happy but it’s hard sometimes

38 - it wasn’t easy to be happy for you

39 - try not to abuse your power

40 - let’s fall in love for the night

41 - need the sun to break

42 - not ready to make nice

43 - too much is never enough

44 - the man who can’t be moved

45 - nothing fucks with my baby

46 - I was far too scared to hit him…

47 - …but I would hit him in a heartbeat now

48 - that funny feeling

49 - easy on me