#brazilians get shit done
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This is so Marshall and Zuma coded
Plot twist, Marshall is 2/4, Zuma is 1/4 and Rocky is the other 1/4 (/affectionally)
#Holy shit talk about an OLD meme#Idk what's worse#If it's the fact I REMEMBER this#Or the weird fact that I can read it in English but with the Brazilian dub voice#PROBABLY THE LATTER BC THAT'S WEIRD AS HECK#I'm not gonna tag this one in the fandom tags bc people might get offended tho#I had my dose of accidentally offending people in other fandoms and I'm so done with this
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“i don’t care if he’s brazilian babe”
requests are open <33
pairing: rafe x reader [est. relationship]
warnings: mention of private parts, fluff, angst? (if you count rate being jealous and overprotectiive as angst lol)
summary: at a sleepover with kie and sarah, they convince you to tease your jealous and overprotective boyfriend...
a/n: keep seeing gfs prank their bf with this on tiktok and imagine how rafe would react.. also thinking of making the title of my fics my fav quote in the fic, whatcha think?
navigation ⋅˚₊‧𐙚‧₊˚ ⋅ obx masterlist
reader has rafe stressinggg in this😭
[please leave requests in asks inbox]
“so what’d you three get up to this weekend?” asked rafe as he kept his eyes on the road, one hand on the steering wheel and on your thigh. He had just picked you and kiara up from kie’s house after you, her and sarah spent the last 2 nights there for a weekend away from the boys. The rest of the pogues decided to have a kegger tonight, both kooks and pogues welcome, so rafe picked you two up on his way there whilst sarah had been picked up by john b earlier.
“oh not much” you replied playing with his hand as he drove “just a bit of shopping then we went to the waxing parlour...” you smiled, kie in the back trying to control the laughter itching to burst out, knowing what is about to come. You yourself too struggled to contain your laughter as you thought back to the conversation at kie’s earlier.
“omg you should totally prank rafe with this,” kie laughed out, shuffling over sarah to show you her phone, ”he would lose his shit.” she added on with a bright but sly smile on her face, watching and waiting for my reaction.
It was a tiktok of a girl pranking her boyfriend saying that she got a brazilian wax done... by a man. [a brazilian wax is waxing your pubic hairs/waxing the hairs down there 👀]
You laughed out at the guy’s manly reaction to another guy seeing his girl’s pussy and imagined what rafe would say. It was no secret to anyone that rafe was overprotective. He always had an arm around you at a party and barely ever took his eyes off of you when you seperate from him. He’s also known to get jealous at times after breaking a few guys noses here and there for just looking at you the wrong way. You didn’t mind it much, as long as he didn’t get to the point where you felt as though he was controlling you. And it never did, in fact it made you feel loved and special, the fact that rafe cared so much about you.
“omg y/n you have to do this on rafe” begged sarah placing emphasis on the ‘have’. “i don't know guys... you know how rafe gets.” you replied, feeling yourself get lured into their shenanigans. “i know!” sarah piped up. “if you prank rafe with this, i’ll prank john b with it too,” she exlaimed, jumping up at her genius idea. “okay, but kie has to do it on JJ then” you bargained, causing you and sarah to turn your heads to kie. “fine” she huffed out, rolling her eyes but smiling, excited to prank the boys.
“i still can’t believe how we barely felt any pain at all this” kie piped up from the back, itching to get the prank started. “daniel did such an amazing job, i’m definitely going back to him” she smirked waiting for it to sink through rafe’s head. “daniel?” rafe snorted and laughed, “i hope you mean danielle, and what do you mean he?” he wondered out loud, continuously flicking his eyes back and forth from you and the road waiting for your reply. Well here goes nothing! “no kie’s right, it was a guy named daniel” you stated non chalantly “there weren’t any women available so we had to go with him”. He removed his hand from your thigh, placing it on the steering wheel with his other, “and you couldn’t go anywhere else” he asked, clearly getting irritated at how casual you were about all this. “everywhere else was closed for maitenance after the storm last week, what else were we meant to do” you half lied, proud of yourself for coming up with an excuse that quickly. “i don’t know, maybe go another day?” rafe retorted, raising his voice at the last couple of words.
The next few minutes went by without any word from the three of you, kie in the back sensing the tension and kind of wishing the prank was done alone between just you and rafe. She’d rather have not been there and hear about it than sit here in this awkward silence.
After a few more minutes you arrived at the beach. As soon as rafe parked the car, kie jumped out muttering a “thanks” desperate to get away from the awkward situation. “bye kie, we’ll find you guys later”. After she was out of an earshot you turned to rafe to see him searching all the waxing parlours in the area on his phone. “rafe” nothing. “what are you doing?” you smiled, unaware to him. “tryna find out who the fuck this daniel guy is” he muttered, too engrossed with his newfound mission. “rafe please” you grabbed his phone and placed it on the phone holder and took his hands in yours making him look at you. His eyes were furious. If looks could kill you’d be gone by now. You pondered for a moment on whether you should continue the prank or not, eventually deciding to since you had come this far anyways and frankly, you had found it funny how pissed off rafe was at this.
“i’m sorry baby, i didnt think you’d get this upset” you chuckled giving him a small peck on the lips. “what do you mean by that y/n, i’m your boyfriend, of course i’m not gonna like another guy touching your body” he dropped his head to the steering wheel as he started to lose his cool. “and here you are acting like it’s the most normal fucking thing in the world” he finished. “cmon rafe, this is his job. he sees at least ten naked bodies a day, he’s not remembering mine” you internally smiled to yourself for the ‘naked’ comment, knowing that would push him off the edge. “what do you mean naked y/n? where did this guy wax you?” rafe was scared now, interally praying that daniel didn’t wax you where he thinks he did “it was a brazilian wax babe” you smiled. “i don’t care if he’s brazilian babe” you mentally face palmed yourself at your boyfriend’s lack of knowledge of a brazilian wax. “no baby, a brazilian wax is... yknow... down there” you motioned to between your legs whilst rafe looked like he’d just witnessed a murder. “what?! you’re telling me another guy saw you NAKED naked?!” it was taking every ounce of willpower you had left to not laugh at this. “yes but-” “no y/n. no buts. how would you feel if i let another girl shave my fucking balls?!” he laughed but was clearly unamused by what you were telling him “you have no idea who this guy is and what he’s like” he finished. “no its not like that, he was really sweet” you said making rafe laugh “of course he was y/n. he was staring at your fucking pussy and you let him. do you know what kinda signal that gives to a guy?” he questioned. “no it’s fine, i told him i have a boyfriend and he said you’re really lucky by the way!”
Rafe couldn’t believe his ears. He knew how kind and trusting you were, even to people who didn’t deserve it. While it was one of his favourite things about you, it also scared him knowing that there are people out there who could easily take advantage of that kindness. That’s maybe why he felt the need to make this way worse than it actually was.
“do you hear yourself right now y/n” he pleaded with you to see where he was coming from. “i’m sorry, i only did it for you” you muttered looking down, really getting into your role for this prank. “yknow i don’t mind a little fuzz” he said making you cringe as he chuckled, looking down on you and tucking a few stray hair strands behind your ear. Rafe decided he had given you enough shit for this and what’s done is done, as long as it doesn’t happen again. “im still gonna have to talk to this daniel guy” he said calming down, stroking your face and wrapping his arms around you as you leaned into him “give him a piece of my mind yknow” he teased. “you don’t have to do that” you looked up at him beaming, deciding it’s time you stop this silly prank. “oh yeah? why’s that?” he smiled, giving you tiny pecks across your cheek moving down to your neck. “cuz i’m only messing with you” you laughed as rafe pulled his head back, confused. “huh?” “there’s no guy named daniel. it’s just this stupid prank kie and sarah begged me to play on you” you explained while reaching your arm out to scratch the back of his neck.
Rafe didn’t know whether to be amused or embarrassed at the scene he caused over a small prank. He didn’t know whether to blame you for pranking him or his sister for planting such ideas in your head. As he watched you laugh and look so happy at the little rise you got out of him tonight, he couldn’t be mad. He found it so fucking adorable how small things like this could make you laugh so much and just brighten your day. Next thing you knew, rafe was attacking your face with kisses while tickling you.
“omg rafe sto- STOP” you laughed out, unable to contain yourself. “you sorry for that mean prank?” rafe questioned not stopping his attack. “yes yes i’m sorry!!” he finally slowed down as your laughs gradually disappeared. “let’s go. everyone’s probably wondering where we are” you said before quickly pecking his nose and making a move to get out the car. Rafe quickly stopped you and brought his lips to your ear “ok but when we get back to mine, i wanna see how your brazilian wax turned out” he whispered before nipping at your earlobe and letting you go.
You both laughed at his boyish antics before making your way to the rest of your friends, ready to tell kie and sarah how the prank turned out, only to be met with a pissed off JJ and John B which was probably due to kie and sarah living up to their end of the deal.
a/n: well that was it. i think this is the first time ive written in a few months and the third overall fic i’ve ever written so im open to feedback. pls i need the criticism to improve 😭
#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron imagine#rafe obx#rafe cameron#rafe#outerbanks#outerbanks masterlist#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron fluff#rafe cameron masterlist#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron one shot#rafe cameron obx#starkeysbaby#rafe cameron x you#fluffy rafe cameron#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron fic#soft!rafe cameron#soft!rafe#jealous!rafe cameron#jealous!rafe#pranking rafe#reader pranks rafe#domestic relationship rafe
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anyways this session has really solidified the reason quackity chose the people he did for me. because i remember connor getting an ask a while back complaining about how they wanted quackity to add people who would actually play instead of his friends (ie wilbur) who may not be active as often and. it rubbed me the wrong way for a lot of reasons, but mainly because it's clear quackity didn't choose just his friends. sure, it was a bonus that he was close to them, but quackity's first priority has never been "who can minmax the server and stream every day?" it's been "who is a good storyteller/who can tell a good story?"
because that's the core of it. the qsmp isn't about streaming or playtime, not necessarily. it's about the story. during the first announcement, people were surprised to see dantdm and jaidenanimations on the cast, because dan isn't really in quackity's circle and jaiden is barely an mcyt even if you push it. but you know what they were? storytellers. dan was a part of so many people's childhoods with his mod showcases and miscellaneous videos, all of which had lore. jaiden creates entire stories from video games! games with pre-determined stories that she has to spin into something new, something of her own.
and then the brazilians were added. some of them still did minecraft content, sure, but not all of them. but they were still storytellers. cellbit has his entire rpg. pac and mike have multiple roleplay series. and when you get to the french, the pattern repeats. baghera, for example, with her gta roleplay. not all of them are minecrafters at their core, but they are storytellers, and for most of them, improvisational ones at that. the same, of course, goes for the newest batch. pol is a filmmaker. vshojo has insane, deeply complex lore for all their vtubers. bagi is adept at ttrpg. sure, people being able to log on often is a necessity, but what good would that be if it ended up sacrificing quality for quantity?
this session really nailed it for me because you could see their expertise shine through. i feel like, even still, a lot of mcrp is seen as "lesser" because of its medium, or because of how it can switch between roleplay and just creators hanging out. roleplay is only typically praised and called to attention when it's highly emotional, and the same goes for the storytelling, with a heavier focus on how well creators can utilize angst as opposed to other moments. but this was treated differently. the silliness of minecraft was gone. what was previously disregarded came into light, like how fucking smart foolish is when writing characters and how well quackity is able to play into the story while staying true to his character, among other things! i just think quackity's brilliance in selecting his server members isn't talked about enough, because holy shit has he done a fantastic job
#icarus speaks#idk. i love the meta of the storytellers#bc it's about them in the end. it's not about minecraft. they could do this in Any medium#to an extent#i just think they <3 do u get me#sorry i used up all my braincells in the main post orz#this is all i got
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COD But If They Were Gen Z Brainrot Things
COD but if they're brainrot. (I don't know what possessed me to do this, uni exams are causing me to tweak).
I formally apologise to: Simon "Ghost" Riley, John Price, John "Soap" MacTavish, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Gary "Roach" Sanderson, Kate Laswell, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra, Nikolai, Phillip Graves, König, Kim "Horangi" Hong-jin, Vladimir Makarov
i did NOT take this seriously 🥴im jit yapping
🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺
Ghost - monday left me broken
Soap's dead, Roach's dead, Mara's dead (in the mobile comics), monday left him broken.
If I were to recount *all* of the shit that he had to go through, I would be here for awhile but I know we know what our Ghost had experienced, he's broken but he's still kicking! Onto Tuesday, Wednesday!
So I think it's a fair assessment for him to be monday left me broken
I also think he listens to the song unironically sometimes
Captain Price - smurf cat
Do I really have to explain this one?
I guess COD nation sees Papa Smurf in him but the thing about smurf cat is that it has a hat, therefore it must be Price
The resemblance is uncanny sometimes (it's just a hat)
i don't have much to say, it's literally just appearance-based for this one
Soap - prime and lunchly
soap is the type of guy to walk into the recording studio and come out with "from the screen, to the ring, to the pen, to the king, where's my crown? that's my bling, always drama, when i ring. see i believe that if i see it in my heart, smash through the ceiling, 'cause i'm reaching for the stars." look me in my metaphorical eyes and tell me im wrong
he would be guzzling down the cherry freeze after a long hard day of training
he likes his cheese drippy bruh
he kinda looks like haley welch if you squint
Gaz - gaining aura
I LOVE GAZ RAAAAH
Look at him? He literally can't physically lose aura?
I'm biased towards Gaz
Even breathing can earn this man aura, there is something innately charismatic and charming about Gaz to the point that even if he trips on air or accidentally walks around with an open bag, typically aura-losing activities, he just wouldn't lose any.
Look at him
He is Kyle "Gaz" Garrick.
Roach - cooked
well, technically, 'cooked' typically indicates that a food item has been processed through fire, at least usually
but i guess this is using the brainrot terminology, still, that changes nothing
cooked in brainrot means to be struggling, done for or that the situation is just bad, the entire brazilian militia being after his ass after he fell from the roof was one of his most iconic moments, he had many cooked moments in the campaign but that one truly defined him, he was, in fact, cooked
literally and figuratively
Laswell - galvanised square steel
galvanised square steel is an extremely durable material, is able to transform even the smallest 1mx1m square apartment into a fully functional multi-purpose home with the assistance of eco-friendly wood veneers and
as ghost put it, "laswell's still solid as a rock" except, she's as solid as galvanised square steel
she's reliable, resilient and shes like the foundation as the galvanised square steel while 141 is like the eco-friendly wood veneers
Alejandro - oil up
one could say that all men in cod could represent 'oil up' but i think alejandro embodies the 'oil up' phrase
im actually just straight tweaking when i say this but i think he'd have a similar community to orange peanut's if he ever became an influencer, like different content but his comment section would be filled with 'when are you going to oil up'
i also think he'd be the kind of guy to gladly oil up on request, granted there was an ample amount of oil
Rodolfo - livvy dunne
rudy doesn't really strike me as a rizzer more like a rizzee (im tweaking so hard right now)
he seems like the type of guy to get rizzed up by baby gronk and then promptly train for his gymnastics or something
there's not much to comment on here, just that he looks like the type of guy to be rizzed
Nikolai - metal pipe sound effect
nikolai is unique in the sense that i think he encapsulates the metal pipe sound effect rather than a phrase or a brainrot figure
i have a feeling that during violence and timing gaz would agree with me
i have a feeling that the butcher in mw2019 would also agree with me
he's a menace but no brainrot compilation is the same without the metal pipe sound effect so :333
Phillip Graves - only in ohio
that gif shows up when i search for ohio
i feel like this one is very self-explanatory
in some instances gyatt and ohio can be used interchangeably so i would also consider him having the dual position of embodying gyatt and ohio at the same time, lucky bloke
König - alpha wolf
furry könig skin
furry wolf skin, no further commentary needed
Horangi - 99% of gamblers quit before they hit big
that is just what he did
Makarov - skibidi toilet
we have all seen the smile skin
skibidi toilet is evil incarnate, poisoning the minds of the children, even in the lore of skibidi toilet it is evil and direct antagonistic villains towards camera head people, sounds just like makarov
the smile skin is like the mould on lunchly cheese, its the outward thing you see but the evil of skibidi toilet like makarovs evil is like the mould spores inside the cheese
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it is now nearly 3am, im so failing my histology class man
#call of duty#modern warfare iii#modern warfare 3#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#john soap mactavish#soap mw2#vladimir makarov#cod mw2#cod mwiii#phillip graves#doodlysketch#gary roach sanderson#skibidi toilet#brainrot#kate laswell#john price#konig mw2#konig cod#kyle gaz garrick#alejandro vargas#rodolfo parra#cod nikolai#what have i done#why did i do this
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hi, I’m not great at requesting things but if this makes sense could you write a high school au where Jason is a football player. I think it would be cute cause he’s definitely tall enough and strong enough but then add in him being kind and wow he would make the BEST high school football player boyfriend. Thank you
⛧° Jason Grace x Nerdy! Reader hcs °⛧
content: jason grace x reader, college au!
warnings: cursing, allusions to sexual stuff (not much tho), stupidtly fluffy and corny.
a/n: bby if i tell you i dreamt about this, would you believe me? like, i swear to all the gods, i dreamt with this and woke up thinking about writing it… well, here ya go. oh, and i also made her a brazilian, i hope you don’t mind? if you do, just ignore it, please 🫡
⛧° 。 ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆༺♱༻⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ 。°⛧
Of course, he’s a great football player.
Like, i know no shit about football, i’m a soccer girly, but he’s the best quarterback in the city. like, he’s really really good.
And obviously everyone believes he’s such an asshole and a womanizer.
But in reality he’s so so nice
Sure, he sleeps with some girls and all, but not as much as his teammates.
He’s also the only jock that sticks with a girlfriend. Not for long, but still more than the other guys ig
So when he was having trouble with maths, he needed a tutor, cause he had to have a back up plan of he didn’t went for the pros
Such a nice boy, fr.
And he went talk with the teacher to ask who could teach him.
And that’s when he found you.
You weren’t exactly a super nerd. You just liked to study.
But you had a lot of friends, since being the only exchange student did bring this sort of popularity around the university.
And when he first came to you, you were kinda bitchy.
You know, you had a bit of hatred towards football players. No idea why, it was just there.
Even with that, you were too kind-hearted to don’t tutor him.
And when you got to know each other… you kinda started liking him.
On your first study session, the library was too full, so you went to the outside
Which was really working out, till Jason found a little bird that probably fell from his nest
The guy was so worried that he almost took the bird home
He would’ve done it if you didn’t stop him
But he found the nest and put the little bird back there
And you just stood there, like “what the fuck? isn’t he supposed to be a douche?”
It happens that he’s not.
And you became pretty good friends with the frequent study sessions and all.
Not to mention he was pretty offended when you told him you didn’t like football.
And you were very offended when he asked if the spoke Spanish in Brazil.
He knew it didn’t, he just did it to piss you off.
He really wanted you to go to one of his games, but you never said you were really going.
So, one day, when his team was having a match against Harvard University, he was more than surprised to see you at the stands, right in the front.
With his jersey. With his number and name on your back.
He honestly felt he was gonna cry right then and there.
He got so happy he made a touchdown. They won.
And you were there, cheering for him and pretending like you understand anything that was going on there.
When the game ended, he came rushing towards you.
“Congrats, Gra-“ Before you could even finish your sentence, he kissed you.
Oh, and it was heaven.
After this, you started dating and it was the best thing you ever experienced.
He was such a gentleman.
Doors? Don’t even touch that. Dates? He’s paying, duh. You’re tired? He’ll carry you, bridal style.
You get the point.
You started liking football because of him. And he started liking soccer because of you.
a/n: i don’t know what to feel about this lol. idk what you’ll think of the brazilian thing, but if you don’t like it, i’ll remake it, promise!
#postcards from leah#jason grace x reader#jason grace x y/n#jason grace#jason grace x you#heroes of olympus#heroes of olympus x reader#pjo hoo toa#pjo#football
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So some fuck ass mom posted on tiktok about her 14 y.o CHILD getting a Brazilian wax/waxing on her body bc it’s “hygienic” (she obv didn’t post the it actually getting done but I digress).The woman who re-posted the video onto twt is having to argue with brain dead women who say “ITS HER CHOICE” and saying she’s a weirdo for being concerned and that they don’t have a problem with a child getting waxed more so than the mom posting the video to begin with, as if we can’t fucking multitask. I think I’m officially black pilled I’m so serious.
No wonder why women fall for the dumb shit men do bc y’all are working with room temp IQs and ZERO critical thinking. The funniest part is when the consequences of not being critical end up happening the feminist who’ve been telling y’all to think more than two seconds will be blamed/“why aren’t so called radfems talking about this!!” And then it fades bc no one wants to read anything or make actual change, I don’t even think a toddler getting lip filler will make y’all use your fucking brain for once.
Y’all are on your own I can’t deal with this shit anymore. The fact that women are fine with the bar being in hell and are allowing these men to get them pregnant when roe v wade has been overturned tells me everything I need to know. We can argue internalized misogyny till the cows come home but the bottom line is that there’s a fuck ton of y’all that don’t wanna be saved and frankly speaking, I don’t wanna save your annoying asses either.
Women should be outraged, should be disgusted and repulsed by the way we’re being stripped of our rights and sense of self not just in legislation but personhood via these traps they’re setting for girls. Robbing them of their youth and innocence bc of the porn addicted moid goblins they go to school with and societies penchant for pedophilia towards girls.
But nah, instead yall break your backs to say “LETS NOT DEMONIZE ALL MEN” after hearing about a horrific tragedy inflicted upon a woman after someone’s comments “I fucking hate men.”Like I’ve said before men don’t have to lift a finger to keep patriarchy alive and running when women get on their knees for free lmao.
#I can show screen shots if you want but honestly why bother#it’s the same stupid shit time and time again.#women have no self preservation or self respect#tired of trying when these mfs enjoy being stupid to defend their fuck ass bf who treats them like trash#deserved tbh idc
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comfort | c.l.
synopsis: in which you comfort him because of Ferrari
my masterlist
Ferrari had done it again.
Yet another failed strategy, yet another shitty race.
You couldn't even keep count of these anymore. Weekend after weekend, race after race, everything seemed to be going against your boyfriend.
From failed hydraulics, to bad-times pit stops, to bad strategies, to crashes. You name it, Ferrari did it. You knew how much the team mattered to Charles, but it was getting out of hand and ridiculous.
When it was time for the Brazilian Grand Prix, you had hoped that it would be different this time. That maybe, just maybe, the team wouldn't mess this one up.
But of course, you had been wrong once again.
The hydraulics had failed, leaving your boyfriend out of the race in the Formation Lap.
"Why am I so unlucky?" your heart broke when you heard the broken voice of your boyfriend on the radio.
You could feel, even from just hearing his voice, how hurt and disappointed he was that he found himself, once again, out of the race before he could prove himself.
You waited impatiently for him to get back to the Ferrari garage, knowing he was going to be in a foul mood and you would have to figure out a way to cheer him up and make him feel better about himself and the situation.
Seeing his car being hauled towards the garage and him slowly stomping after it made your heart hurt for him.
The moment he looked up and noticed you waiting for him there, he sped up and crashed into your arms, letting his helmet fall to the ground.
"You're okay, baby. I'm here, it's okay" you whispered in his ear, running your hand through his hair softly.
"Let's go" he mumbled in your ear before he pulled away, took your hand and started leading you to his driver's room.
You followed him in silence, knowing it was best to let him come to you and talk whenever he was ready. Pushing him did nothing but worsen his current state.
After you had made it to his room, he locked the door behind you before collapsing on his couch with his face buried in the pillow, grunting.
You slowly walked up to him and sat down on the edge of the couch, your hands slowly starting to massage his back and his shoulder.
He moaned at the feeling, his hand finding your knee and gently rubbing his hand over it.
As you worked on his back and shoulders, you could feel the tense knots slowly dissipate, his muscled finally starting to relax after hours and hours of soliciting.
"How are you feeling?" you had asked him after several minutes of silence, your hands now only dragging your nails up and down his back like you knew he liked.
He sighed, leaning into your touch.
"Like shit" he mumbled, his thick Monegasque accent rippling through.
"I know, baby" you comforted him, continuing to run your hands up and down his back.
"I just don't understand why this keeps happening" he began, turning around on his side so he was facing you. "Every single race, something has to go wrong for me, but never for Carlos. It's always be that's out, always me who has car problems, always me who crashes, me every single time. I'm starting to think they're doing it on purpose" your heart broke hearing him talk like this about the team he had dreamt of being a part of since he was a little child.
"Hey, hey, don't think like that. I know it's incredibly frustrating, and you've had a tough year, but that doesn't mean that things aren't going to get better. You just need to have faith in yourself and in the team" you tried to comfort him, despite knowing that no words could make him feel better about the situation.
He nodded but didn't say anything, just closing his eyes in hopes to escape the world and everything around him.
♡♡♡♡♡
You had hoped it would be different now. The car was looking good, he was flying in qualifying, securing his spot in pole, everything seemed to be going perfectly.
Until it didn't.
Chaos in the garage preparing for a pit stop and a bad strategic decision later, Charles found himself out of the race, once again.
You couldn't watch the screen where your boyfriend was retiring his car, feeling furious beyond words.
The amount of sweat, tears and pain that Charles had poured into the team, the loyalty he had for Ferrari even when everything proved against the team, and still they failed him every time he needed them.
You stormed out of the garage, making your way to Charles' room where you knew he would appear as soon as he got out of the car.
In times like this, you knew the last thing he wanted was to linger in the garage with his team, angry as he was, not wanting to cause a scene where everyone could see and hear.
True to your word, not even 10 minutes had passed by until the door opened and in came Charles, looking sadder than you had ever seen him.
When his eyes met yours, he couldn't hold in the tears that started running down his cheeks. You pouted and quickly got up, enveloping him in your arms and squeezing him tightly.
Charles hugged you back just as tightly, burying his face in the crook of your neck and letting out sobs that chipped away little bits of your heart at a time.
You stayed like that for a good 10 minutes, letting him get everything out of his system while kissing every inch of his body that you could reach and whispering sweet reassurances in his ear.
Once he started calming down and his tears were no longer flowing down his cheeks, he slowly lifted his head from your neck, his beautiful eyes now swollen and red.
"Oh, my sweet love" you whispered, giving him a gentle smile before pecking his lips and cradling his face in your hands.
"I'm sick of this" he said, his voice hoarse and croaky.
"I know, I know" you nodded and brought him in for another hug, making sure he could feel your love and support in his time of need.
Despite being once again disappointed by Ferrari, in that moment, Charles couldn't help but smile a little, knowing that despite everything, he had you by his side.
And you were all he needed.
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#imagines#oneshots#fanfiction#one shot#formula 1#formula one#charles leclerc#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1#f1 x reader#scuderia ferrari#ferrari#forza ferrari#ferrari f1#formula1#formula racing#sky sports f1#leclerc#charles lecrelc#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc brainrot#charles leclerc one shot#charles leclerc drabble#charles leclerc blurb
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JJK MMA Fighter AU Headcanons
[Headcanons for Toji, Geto, Gojo, and Sukuna as MMA Fighters]
MMA fighter Toji Fushiguro, who keeps everyone on his training team shocked when he consistently makes weight because he eats whatever he wants until about a month before weigh ins. When he’s fighting he’s always lean and cut as hell despite said “fuck it” diet.
MMA fighter Toji is a light heavyweight, he could choose to fight as a heavyweight if he wanted, but he’d be at the lower end of the weight class and if he bulked up any more it would affect his flexibility.
MMA fighter Toji is a black belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and holds the record for fastest submission. Absolute master of sneaky submissions, to the point that opponents will try to avoid being taken down by him at all costs. Suits him, if he doesn’t win by submission he’ll win by points alone because they’re too afraid to get in his (long) reach. He hates boring fights though, so expect lots of taunting in these cases.
MMA fighter Toji’s early fight record is a bit spotty, but once he hits his prime a few years in his record is nearly flawless. Except for one fight that gets brought up a lot more than he would like where he was knocked out cold.
MMA fighter Toji comes from a fighting family, a boxing family specifically, but absolutely does not associate himself with them. When he was young and talked more shit he asked a few of them to fight him, but they either blew him off or refused to have an MMA match - it was boxing only or nothing.
MMA fighter Toji gets his chance to fight someone from the Zen’in family eventually, and decides he won’t take them to the ground at all - he’ll box them. He wins by knockout in the second round.
MMA fighter Suguru Geto is a middleweight. He sticks to his wheelhouse and you won’t find him moving weight classes or suddenly trying any flashy moves.
MMA fighter Geto whose background was initially in Judo, and early on he made the smart choice to supplement it with Brazilian jiu-jitsu. That paired with his strength and stamina make him a dangerous combo and he’s known for getting almost anyone down for a little ground and pound until he earns himself a stoppage win.
MMA fighter Geto doesn’t have to make weight, he just stays at weight. Thanks to this he’s a frequent late call-in when other fighters have had to back out at the last minute. His diet is clean and measured and he has to be on rest for a good while to really indulge. He just prefers being a clean eater.
MMA fighter Geto can get in his head sometimes about his opponents though, particularly if they’re known to be slippery on the ground and hard to get a favourable position against. His losses tend to be a result of hanging back too much and letting it go to judges' decision - in which case it’ll be his lack of striking that gets him. At his best, though? He’s fearsome and will hold a title at some point in his career.
MMA fighter Geto is neither a trash talker, nor a show off, so he doesn’t get quite as much press as other fighters. Some of his fans theorise that he’d have much more title shots and bigger fights if he were to play up his personality for viewers, but even more fans like and respect that he’s himself and is a purist in his fighting. He gets the job done, without bells and whistles.
MMA fighter Geto has excellent sportsmanship. Even if he’s a clear winner he doesn’t ever downplay his opponent’s skills or talk badly about them. Always taps gloves before a fight, and the second the person taps or the ref waves his arms to stop, he’s letting go and checking on his opponent. This behaviour earns him lots of respect and lots of friends among his peers. It’s beneficial in the end because lots of other fighters enjoy training with him, and Suguru is particularly good at incorporating new things he picks up seamlessly into his existing skill set.
MMA fighter Suguru Geto who, of his generation of big names, is most expected to become a trainer upon retirement. He’s always helpful to even the most inexperienced fighters during training, and generally has really great insights on fighting.
MMA fighter Geto always gets dragged out to at least one place to celebrate after a win. His training partner Satoru Gojo insists on it. Though he doesn’t stay out late and will always end the night icing his muscles and drinking loads of water to recover.
MMA fighter Satoru Gojo is the poster boy for his company. He has sponsorships galore. He’s handsome, interviews well, keeps his nose clean as far as the public is concerned, and is an amazing fighter.
MMA fighter Gojo’s talent was noticed early, so he’s been in some kind of combat sport competitively since he was a kid. Judo, taekwondo, anything he could try he’s done for at least a summer. He later refocused on primarily Muay Thai and kickboxing.
MMA fighter Gojo is a lightweight in his early career, but as he gets older and bulks up a little Gojo moves up into the welterweight class where he really shines. He has an incredible reach thanks to his long limbs, which poses problems for anyone against him.
MMA fighter Gojo is an all rounder - dangerous standing and dangerous on the ground, but if an opponent is strong enough they can carve out some points by holding him down so he doesn’t have the chance to get momentum on those powerful kicks.
MMA fighter Gojo can eat whatever he wants and not put on weight, he never seems sluggish after his big meals or sugary treats either and no one understands how. He just seems to eat whatever he wants without consequence, although as he gets into his late 20s his manager and trainers are always on his ass about eating better. He listens… sometimes.
MMA fighter Gojo will taunt and tease loads before and during fights, but really does have good sportsmanship. He always taps gloves at the beginning of a match, compliments his opponent and hugs or pats them on the back post-match, and you won’t find him breaking rules. Say he mis-judges a punch and hits someone on the back of the head or his foot slips during a thigh kick and he gets them in the groin, he’ll feel genuinely bad and allow them all the time the referee can for recovery before the match resumes.
MMA fighter Gojo parties hard after a match. Not necessarily drinking, but he’s going out on the town, dancing, being his happy loud self, eating all the things his trainers begged him not to in the lead up to weigh-ins. Even though his manager initially worried he would make a fool of himself, it actually only helps his image. Many fans will come across him in a bar or club after a match and get pictures with him. He’s just friendly and takes the time, even if he’s trying to unwind.
MMA fighter Ryomen Sukuna whose only losses are disqualifications for times he got too carried away - if that even counts. No one has ever beaten him outright. Despite this he has some of the gnarliest cauliflower ear you’ve ever seen.
MMA fighter Sukuna who got kicked out of his first MMA company for poor conduct.
MMA fighter Sukuna is a heavyweight that specialises in boxing and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu - the latter gives a lot of his opponents trouble because at this weight class they’re expecting a glorified boxing/kick boxing match and don’t know what’s coming once they’re on the ground.
MMA fighter Sukuna always has some viewers debating on whether he’s a fraud for how, despite winning, he’s always down on points in his scorecard. It’s only because he likes eating punches from opponents if only to show them that he can shake them off like nothing, and he gets his own points deducted for rule breaking. Punches to the back of the head, kneeing downed opponents, but he only does these things once in a match to avoid disqualification nowadays. The points don’t matter to him anyway, he finishes the fight when he feels like it.
MMA fighter Sukuna secured a spot on title cards from a young age, thanks to his impressive frame and even more impressive taunting in the press leading up to fights.
MMA fighter Sukuna once dropped down two weight classes just to fuck up someone he doesn’t like on record. People count him out for the physical strain dropping so much muscle would have on anyone else, but this isn’t just anyone else, it’s Ryomen Sukuna.
MMA fighter Sukuna who, as he ages, has to teach new up and comers a lesson again and again. The more someone talks about him being past his prime, the harder they’ll fall. Though he’ll still talk non-stop about how early MMA was better, when you could fight anyone of any weight class and there weren’t so many rules around how to safely beat someone.
MMA fighter Sukuna who, after yet another win, celebrates by drinking and feasting and fucking. Just pure hedonism. He’s had a few belligerent moments, and a few encounters of getting a little too hot and heavy in the corner of a club, but he’s just too popular as a sort of “heel” in the MMA world that organisers make any press around more illegal activities disappear.
#this one is purely self indulgent tbh#also spawned a mma fighter sukuna one shot in the wips lol#trying new formatting for hcs too idk how i feel#my writing#jjk headcanons#toji fushiguro#toji headcanons#gojo headcanons#geto headcanons#ryomen sukuna#sukuna headcanons#sukuna
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One of the Team obtained CONFIRMATION that the blonde woman in the video and pics at Enoteca Rosso restaurant in London with Sam Heughan, May 4, 2024, WAS INDEED Sarah Holden! DMs posted with permission 👇
I blacked out the fan's IG account, even though haters like Cherylcheryl aka Boot Sau ce Pun k already found it, and accused the poor fan of lying. What else is new? Lord. Any time Sam is seen with NOT Cait, Extreme Shippers, Ex Extreme Shippers attack. The fan must have blocked Cheryl, but I was shown in DM what Cheryl posted on the fan's IG account.
Before I show you the #samarah confirmation, here's Ex Extreme Shipper now turned Sam hater, Cheryl being her evil self. She can't help herself. 👇
Cheryl has done this to EVERY woman Sam has ever dated. And the Sam hater accounts just lap up her every word when she posts on Tumblr as Boot Sau ce Pun k. Oh well, sad lives they lead.
But the TRUTH shall not be deterred 👇 and, yes, my darlings, it shall set you free. Here is the Brazilian fan who got this pic with Sam Heughan at Enoteca Rosso restaurant in London on May 4, 2024 👇
CONFIRMING that the blonde woman having lunch with Sam 👇
Was INDEED Sarah Holden 👇🤗
Sooooo, THIS 👇 WAS Sarah Holden with Sam in London last weekend. 100% CONFIRMED by an eyewitness who has NO reason to make up shit.
I was the FIRST to get the SCOOP that Sarah and Sam were dating MONTHS ago, and now it's FINALLY confirmed. Naysayers can continue to say "they're just friends," but those of us who've dated actual men, not the battery operated kind, know a man doesn't go from Glasgow to London to spend his UK bank holiday weekend with no other friends tagging along with him...to be with "just a friend," especially one who looks like this. 👇 Facts of life. 🤷♀️
#samheughan#sam heughan#sarah holden#samarah#hyrox uk#london#samarah confirmed#fan video#fan pic#brazilian fan#cheryl#enoteca rosso
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My Headcanons for the Strawhats: (Monster Trio)
Luffy:
- Low-key has REALLY bad abandonment issues (see him telling Ace he keeps following him into a dangerous forest bc it makes him feel less alone, Sabo's 'death', Saboady, Marineford, etc)
- Autistic
- When he relaxes/sleeps his body will become super slack an his arms an legs will spread out all over
- HATES the cold and his body hurts when it's too cold out (rubber breaks easily when frozen)
- Will drink but is superrrrrrr picky about booze
- Has very green eyes an no one can convince me otherwise
- Love language is Physical touch (He bites people, affectionately)
- (Based on my Headcanons that Luffy is Brazilian and Robin is Peruvian) His first language is Portuguese an if he forgets a word he'll ask Robin to translate
- Favorite color is red (any shade)
- Likes collecting shiny rocks/pretty sea shells
- Is the most emotionally intelligent person on the crew an has really good observation skills but takes most things at face value/doesn't question them bc he can't understand why someone wouldn't want to show/say exactly what they mean
- If he cries or gets embarrassed enough to blush he'll cover his face with his hat
- Likes when Nami/anyone paints his nails but can never sit still long enough to get them done nicely
- Ambidextrous
- Knows a lot about bugs and can rattle off facts about them for hours
- Really really good at guessing games to the point everyone thinks he's cheating somehow
- Has stretch marks alllll over
- Eats so much bc his stomach stretches no matter how much he eats so he never really feels 'full'
- Has HATED Garp ever since he did nothing to help during Marineford
Zoro:
- Has dimples but he's insecure so he tries hiding them
- Everyone thinks he has green eyes but I think he has brown eyes
- His love language is Acts of service
- Extremely touch starved (if someone plays with his hair he is passing out IMMEDIATELY)
- Secretly loves that (other then Robin) Chopper always goes to him first for everything
- Really loves forests, if they land on an island with one he's most likely heading there first
- Unofficial Official first mate of the strawhats
- When it comes to keeping the crew safe he trusts Robin & Sanji the most (other then the Captain ofc) because he knows they won't hesitate to kill someone they're fighting
- Nami is like a sister to him
- Is actually REALLY good at math an confused tf out the crew when they found out (is now in charge of keeping track of the amount of necessities on the ship or how much they need for a certain amount of time)
- Will forget how long he's been going when training an won't realize til someone stops him
- Gets worried/nervous anytime he watches someone walking down stairs
- Knows a shit ton of knife/sword tricks (can absolutely swallow a sword)
- Doesn't like showers bc he hates water on his face
- Is willing to follow Luffy's orders without question (Post time skip, Pre time skip -specifically before thriller bark- Zoro would still question Luffy)
- One of the few Straw hats that hasn't dated anyone (Sanji had some flings w/ regulars at Baratie, Usopp w/ Kaya, Nami had a few flings here an there, Franky had been with a few people back on water 7 and Brook had been with a few people back when he was alive)
- His favorite color is Sage green/Gold
- Taught Chopper some sword fighting techniques (Brook also joined in an taught Chopper some of his moves)
- Loves taking naps with Chopper (Chopper is low-key his favorite person on the crew)
- He an Robin have little competitions to one up eachother with gifts or things for Chopper bc they both wanna be his favorite >:)
Sanji:
- Loves the ocean/thinks it's the most beautiful part of nature ever
- Either is a Queer Cis guy OR a Queer Trans woman<3
- Ace was absolutely his gay awakening but he thought it was a 'fluke' til he stayed on the momorio island and accepted himself
- Sees it as a HUGE compliment when anyone on the crew gains weight bc it reaffirms he's doing his job well :)
- Loves loves loves all animals and won't let anyone hurt them (including rodents/other "gross" animals)
- Has insectophobia/arachnophobia and OCD
- HATES having anything covering to much of his face/head bc of the mask Judge had him in
- Pulls on his hair when frustrated/angry/overwhelmed/etc.
- French is his first language
- Knows how to figure skate, do ballet and learned gymnastics
- His love language is Words of affirmation
- Writes letters to Zeff at least once a week (after the events at WCI he started addressing Zeff as Dad in his letters)
- Is secretly writing his own cookbook
- Has anisocoria, effects his right eye (anisocoria can easily be confused with heterochromia. It gives the appearance of two different eye colors, but the variation only relates to pupil size — which can cause one eye to look darker than the other — not the actual eye color.)
- Sanji an Usopp are actually really close (both their moms passed bc of sickness both had shit dads plus soba mask + sogeking friendship is superior)
- Sees Zoro as a brother (their dynamic is like the eldest brothers who try to compete over everything)
- Sees Robin as a mother figure but low-key feels guilty about it
- Told Nami everything about his past after WCI and they're really close now
- Sees Luffy a bit as an obnoxious younger brother
- When it gets really hot he'll let Chopper sit inside/in front of the freezer for a little bit
#one piece#monkey d luffy#roronoa zoro#vinsmoke sanji#straw hat pirates#monster trio#acesan#only a little though
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Black metal battle vest update
A few more patches here - still plenty of space, but I'm getting to the point where the free spots are small and/or awkward.
Many of these are traced or stencilled and painted with black fabric paint onto white fabric.
The Greek lettering is from Rotting Christ and means "666". I don't understand Greek so I don't know how that works, but I feel like less of a teenage edgelord with this than I would a patch that just says "666".
Impaled Rektum is the band from the movie Hevi Reissu (Heavy Trip). Strictly speaking they don't belong on a BM vest as their music in the movie definitely leans more towards death metal (or more accurately symphonic post-apocalyptic reindeer-grinding Christ-abusing extreme war pagan fennoscandian metal) but I love that movie. Plus all the characters in the band represent a different genre, and Pasi/Xytrax is clearly supposed to embody BM.
Morbid is the band Per Ohlin/Dead was in before Mayhem. They only did one EP plus a few tracks that were only ever performed live, but they're awesome. Again not BM really, but with the Dead connection I felt like I could include them. Plus the shape is perfect for this spot 😁
Behemoth and Satyricon shouldn't need any introduction - those are both painted - and Rotting Christ underneath, which I bought from their bandcamp store. Seems appropriate to have those 3 together since I'm seeing them all on The Unholy Trinity tour next year.
The Alcest one is also painted. One of their logos is a little more complicated and I didn't even attempt it, but luckily they have another which is very simple and fits this spot perfectly. Alcest are a French band, and created blackgaze, a fusion of BM and shoegaze. Their music is gorgeous.
Last of the painted ones, and the first one I did using my tracing method. I got so much confidence from this that it led me to making all the others. Sarcófago, phenomenal Brazilian band who played a huge part in shaping what we think of as BM today.
As did Celtic Frost just underneath, this patch came from the Danse Macabre boxset because I'm a heathen who uses her collectible merch instead of keeping it pristine.
On that subject... two Immortal patches. Northern Chaos Gods was bought singly but War Against All was from the boxset too. I don't know whether I'm likely to get shit for this or not, but I've listened to Immortal for years, and I honestly think the last two albums (the ones since Abbath left) are their best ever, which is why I'm representing both of them here.
The War Against All box also had a pin badge but I haven't decided where on the vest I want to put it. It also came with an artcard signed by Demonaz which is exclusive to Eyesore Merch in the UK.
Backpatch. This was also homemade, but I'm not skilled enough to paint it, so it was done with printer transfer paper. Ulver are one of my favourite bands of all time, from their 90s BM, to their avant-garde, neoclassical, experimental, noise, psychedelic, and 80s synth style. All their work is absolute genius, and Nattens Madrigal is my favourite of their early material.
Lastly a couple of purchased ones, Bathory who again should need no introduction, and Agalloch who are another all-time favourite of mine, everything they've ever created is stunningly beautiful.
#black metal#post black metal#atmospheric black metal#battle jacket#battle vest#diy jacket#diy patches#diy projects#morbid band#ulver#immortal band#sarcofago#Hevi reissu#heavy trip#celtic frost#satyricon#alcest#blackgaze#behemoth band#rotting christ#agalloch#thrash metal#heavy metal#Homemade patches#band patches#band merch#patch jacket#patch vest#bathory band#per yngve ohlin
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My comments on Arcane s01
-Vi is the sister I wish I had, fr. And as an lesbian older sister myself, it wasn't hard for me to connect with her from the very first episode.And now that I've watched the show, I don't understand how some people blame her for wherever she did to Jinx. Yeah, Jinx was just a kid but guess what, so was Vi. Jinx lost everything? So has Vi.
"but Violet abandoned Powder" No! She was protecting her lil sister. And she just saw her sister murder their entire family, how y'all think she feels? And she was about to save Powder before she was kidnapped.
And the fact that she manages to be so soft and good besides everything she went through... Vi is THE exception.
-Powder/Jinx was just a kid and all but damn. Vi forgives it all she has done, and in the one time Vi needs her forgiveness, she's so quick to hate her for good. Did she really realize what she had done?
Well, now I see why some people compared her to Azula. The difference is that Azula never had anything like Vander or Vi, Jinx had that and still went nuts. And also, Azula never goes for the murder, not really when it was expected (like when she was betrayed by Mai and Ty Lee). While Jinx would give 2 shits about kill people for funzies.
Yes, I feel sympathy for her, just as much as I feel anger towards her. She is a complex character that's for sure. And mentally ill
And my hate for her is mostly for the way she treats Vi honestly
Anyway, there's this joke on Brazilian fandom that Jinx is homophobic and that's why she can't stand Caitlyn and can't stand seeing her with Vi, and I think it's honestly hilarious
-CaitVi is a wonderful ship. Nothing against the explicit and big gestures such as kissing and all but damn, I missed the subtlety. The minor and meaningful touches, the gazes...it reminded me so much of Korrasami
-I loved Jayce and Caitlyn's relationship. When united, gays and lesbians are strong.
And I still don't get why people keep pretending Caitlyn actions on s2(as far as I saw in the trailers) aren't justified. Her mom was murdered by the people she tried to help, if it was me, I would also raise hell upon them. Anyway, let's talk about s1 Caitlyn and she is just so adorable.
She really wanted to make a difference, to help. She got out of her bubble and got a taste of the real world, and I bet it hurt. She just wanted to help and to do what's right but she paid the high price and has all the right to me mad at s2
And from the way she flinched at Jinx during the "dinner" scene, at bet the hours she spent under Jinx mercy weren't nice
-Im sorry, I didn't care much about the hextec plot. I know it's important and it's what makes the character on the road but their inner struggles and their subplots are far better to watch.
The only interesting part of them was Jayce cuz he is such an interesting character. For the way I've seen people talk about them, I thought he was gonna be the worst but no. You can see he struggles with some decisions. He ain't bad, he just does bad decisions
-Ekko is such a G man. If something happens to him in s2, I will riot. I like how he is the exact opposite of Jinx.
Ekko also lost everything and everyone, but instead of Jinx, he turned his pain into something good, into helping others the way Vander and Benzo helped him and the other kids.
I wasn't expecting him to be friends with Heimerdinger but I love that for him
-Lets talk about something serious, Jinx was right in her anger towards the upper class but blowing things up was not the answer. Vander knew and saw things how it was, making deals is better than having innocent blood in the streets.In fact, I saw a lot of simplified comments about the politics and social aspects of Arcane and now that I've watched the show I see how damn immature and naive a lot of them are.
Do not get me wrong, we should rebel every time we need and violence is a part of that. No revolution happened without it. But we should be wise about the battles we pick.
Let's look at Caitlyn for example, she is born rich and a good person. It's naive to expect someone born with everything and disconnected with the lower class problems and needs, to all of sudden be an ally to social causes. Born rich and privileged doesn't necessarily mean you are born a bad person, just as much as born poor doesn't automatically make you a good person.
Now, do you think Caitlyn deserved to lose her mother like that? Do you think she deserves what Jinx did to her just because she was from Piltover? That's when you lose potential allies and gain strong enemiesIt's not that simple. Social problems such as class differences, poverty, violence...it's not something that you can fix that easily. Oh man, I wish it was but it ain't.
With all that said, Jinx, Vi, Caitlyn, Ekko, Vander...none of them are evil and most of their actions (if not all of them) have a solid reason behind it, but this doesn't mean they were the best thing to do.
-Fuck you Silco. He is what happens when you put a "wherever it cost" mentality, cuz sometimes the cost is high. Too high. Also, he doesn't want justice or revenge, he wants power
-The animation and sound design is a masterpiece too. And the fight choreography? Damn shit was fire
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Roier: Eh, there's a lot of Brazilians here now. Ahh, I know why, dude. I know why there are a lot of Brazilians here. Cellbit. (Bell dong sound) Left the Simpsons. Cellbit left the Simpsons. (Piano key sound) I knew it, dude, Cellbit left the Simpsons, guys. Dude, for those who didn't know Cellbit… Cellbit stopped doing streams, guys. He said I got tired of these filho de puta, he said I’m tired of the rapazeada go to hell. That’s what he said. That’s what he said. He retired. He’s retired. “For two weeks.” It's what he wants you to think, dude. For example, your dad told you the same thing yes or no, bitch? Your dad told you, "Son I'll be back tomorrow." He didn't come back tomorrow, dude. It's the same but this is crazier because he told you two weeks, imagine if your dad hasn't come back yet and he told you he’d be back tomorrow, dude- Or no, no, he told you I’m going for- I’m going for milk, I’m going for milk- That, look, how long does it take to get milk? At- At most an hour with traffic. An hour with traffic. Imagine dude, this dude said two weeks. You’re never going to see him again. (Bell dong sound) And neither will I, dude! And that’s with the fact we were going to play Elden Ring. Elden Ring. Now, Elden Ring, will never be done, I'll have to do it alone, dude. I’ll have to do it alone. (Sings) Elden Ring has gone to shit. It’s fucked. He applied the One Direction on us, dude. It’s gone to shit, dude.
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╭────────༺💚༻────────╮
𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐒𝐚𝐦𝐮𝐞𝐥 (18+ MDNI)
A/N: Requested by anon/ @sinister-shark. I can't believe this only took me 2 days to write it all. Holy shit, that's fast. (extra spicy 🥵😏)
*Sam does speak Brazilian Portuguese in this, just so you're aware.
**Trying new format for general info of MGS smut lmao
Pairing: Jetstream Sam X Fem!Reader
𝑾𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝑪𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕: 𝟖𝟕𝟎
⚠️Warnings: NSFW, 18+ MDNI, shower sex, wall sex, dirty talk, begging, pussy eating, blowjobs, oral (both ways/p in v), unprotected
╰────────༺💚༻────────╯
After a long day of working, you were just done. You felt like falling apart as you struggled to open the door. Once you got inside, you instantly flopped your tired body face down on the couch. You quietly groaned, not knowing that Sam was sitting there shirtless.
He looks over at you, gently smiling as he smooths down your hair. His fingers trail through your luscious locks, occasionally rubbing the back and sides of your neck with a couple of his fingers as you stayed face down.
"How's that for you, meu amor?" He asks, saying those last few words in a seductive tone. Sam was doing this to see if you'd notice.
"Mmmm... Feels good when you do that..." You managed to mumble out, trying your eager best not to sound too tired. You liked it even better when he called you pet names in his native language.
Sam's iconic smirk gets the best of him, moving his hand to your back and unzipping your dress, easily finding your bra. He unhooks it and you exhale a sharp breath as you feel your breasts bounce free, which felt like the force of 1,000 suns.
He pulls his hand away and you look up at him, shyly smirking as your cheeks flushed light pink.
You almost felt like he was trying to tell you something as you noticed Sam's hardened dick just begging to bulge out of his pants. You slowly roll off the couch, getting in front of him and undoing his pants. Sam leans his head back against the couch as he feels your finger hooking the waistband of his boxers.
You pull down his boxers to release the monster he's been hiding since you got home an hour ago. You take his cock in your mouth and gently swirl your tongue around the tip before moving your way up his length. Sam whinces as he looks at the ceiling, his face bright red and sweaty as he breathed heavily.
"Oh, droga... Deus, por que você tinha que fazer isso comigo... Por favor... Continue me fodendo assim..." Sam pants, feeling like he was in a trance. He just kept staring at the ceiling as he felt you lightly sucking on his dick raw as the tip touched the back of your throat.
Sam knew you were good at sucking his cock, but he really wanted to eat you out because of this. He moves his hand around the back of your neck and you pull out from his cock, which was now glistening in a subtle layer of your saliva. Before you could say anything, Sam picks you up bridal style, carrying you to the bathroom as he tugs your dress down.
He turns on the shower and the ideas running around in his head get the best of him. Sam shoves your back against the wall, spreading your legs out and around his neck so he could have full access to your pussy. He looks you dead in the eyes, doing that deadly smirk of his that almost made you flinch everytime.
"You naughty, naughty girl. You thought you could get away with sucking my cock?" Sam states with arousal, inching closer to your entrance. "No, no, no. I might as well eat that delicious dessert of mine, better known as your buraco."
He growls deep in his throat, pressing his mouth against your folds and licks them for a minute before sticking his tongue in and out repeatedly. Sam doesn't talk much during his "dessert eating", but he does comment here and there about how good you taste.
Once he was finished eating you out and got his fill, your mood was definitely horny. After you got down from Sam's shoulders, you start kissing him like you were feral. After a good 7 minutes, he turns you around and pins you to the wall again, causing you to let out a tiny breathless moan as your body and breasts were firmly smooshed against the wet tile.
"Ohhh~, this hurts so bad~..." You say in a whiny and teasing voice. "Fuck me, Samuel~."
"If you do that little noise again, maybe I will" He coos in your ear, running his finger along the side of your ass. You breathlessly moan again and you earned Sam's deadly smirk. He bites the side of your neck, causing your eyes to roll back. As he bit your neck, he kept one hand on your back and the other on his dick. Sam roughly shoves his cock into your cunt, which was the perfect fit for someone's dick like his.
"You know, you're such a boa garota," He replies, as he continues to pound into you. "you take my cock in so well, too well even."
"-Ngh... Fuck, I think I'm gonna cum..." You say back.
Immediately after saying that very sentence, taking your hand and slipping it between your legs, you rubbed viciously at your clit while you came, your legs shook against the wall, pussy dripping, eyes rolling back again. Sam moaned at the feeling of you tightening around him, he was thoughtful enough to keep pounding into you until you were finished before pulling out.
#tokyo chainsaw dragon#tokyo dragon smut#metal gear smut#metal gear#metal gear rising#mgr sam#jetstream sam#jetstream sam x fem!reader#jetsream sam x you#jetstream sam x reader#mgs smut#smut#samuel rodrigues#metal gear x reader#mgs x reader
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Old swiftie here. I'm so over Taylor shading Joe. Like, I've always defended her because she, as an artist, is allowed to express herself and sing about her life, but she's literally just been taking cheap, coordinated shots against him for months now and it's just ugly. It's one thing for her to write about her feelings, another to shit talk him to her girlfriends, and a WHOLE OTHER THING to take every opportunity to blast him in front of the whole world. It's even worse to me that he really wanted to be private and now that they're over she's making everything public as a last laugh. He hasn't said anything, he's barely shown his face since the break up. All of this could have gone away by now, if she didn't keep bringing it back up. For someone who talked a whole lot about her accomplishments being diminished by the media in favor of her love life and how unfair that is, right now she's the only one to blame for it. She's really not missing any chances when it comes to talking about Travis and even worse comparing them being public to Joe. And I'm sorry, but some of the stuff she says is just hurtful no matter what unfolded. Wasted time? Really? I just don't get how someone can write such beautiful love songs, be so in love, talk for YEARS about how being private is the right thing and what she needed for their mental health, and then go "wow what a load of wasted time you were, and I gotta tell the whole world about it." She just flipped on him so hard and that's the kind of thing I always defended her from. I'm not finding her at all different from the likes of Kanye. That's not the kind of person I'd like to be around in real life and it definitely isn't the kind of person I want to be supporting. Idk I just really can't with the way she's rewriting history. It's like she forgot she disappeared for a reason and has now fully bought into the idea that he kept her locked in her basement or something. I always thought that if you really wanted to know someone's character you should put them on top of the world and see what they do with all that power and I'm sad to say nothing Taylor has done this year has made me think she's someone I should root for. Working with a rapist, dating a racist/misogynist/zionist then defending him, turning on someone she once implied save her life, the way she handled the Rio shows in Brazil (as a brazilian fan)... It's all just rotten. A real shame bc I've been with her since 06 but better late than never I guess.
A real shame indeed, because she's someone i used to defend a lot as well. But with everything that has happened this year have put such a bad taste in my mouth and also made me realize how her haters have always been so right. I used to think she has improved herself a lot both personally and professionally but to throw away all those character development as a wastage of time just because a relationship didn’t work out is so childish and embarrassing, like how can her fans not see through this?
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WAIT HOLY FUCKING SHIT IT ISNT EVEN JUST QUACKITY PAC GOT MAD AT FOR DATING TUBBO AS WELL. There was the time Pierre invited Tubbo to his bed and u can see Pac going to smack Pierre and getting outraged /silly at him....
What have u DONE to me now all I can think of is poly morning crew despite literally never thinking of it before,,,, theyre just so. SOOOO...
(Link to the clip I mentioned O_O v)
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZM6g523bc/
HAHAHHA
Congrats on joining the ranks we need more poly morning crewers o7
Anyway Pac is sooooo the jealous type which makes him not caring about Tubbo flirting with Fit even more.... well. I mean when morning crew were discussing polyamory Bagi said something abt a Brazilian meme abt getting 7 bitches. and Pac said now he just needs 5 more. are you intending to be one of those Pac?
(Also Pac was interested in poly... he was jealous abt Tubbo having multiple partners.. Listennn all I'm saying is that Poly Morning Crew wouldn't be farfetched if they wanted to make it canon..)
#txt#qsmp#asks#anonymous#morning crew#poly morning crew#bagi is also poly but shes not part of their polycule i think#fitpacbo
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