#both of those quotes i found on pinterest !!

[sage-is-in-fact-very-tired]

and what if I made a lovebirds playlist . what if I was simply so silly

[cece693]

Pain (Lestat de Lioncourt x Male Vamp. Reader)

This small fic came to me while looking through Pinterest. You know those little 'aesthetic' quotes? Well, it came from this one specifically: 'I loved you even when it hurt.' This fic includes things from both the movie and TV show, so no specific Lestat was used for inspiration. Enjoy.

Summary: On the anniversary of his transformation, m/r can't help but remember his past: one that includes his ex-lover and sire, Lestat de Lioncourt.

M/n was tired. Though his outward appearance betrayed no signs of aging—no wrinkles, no gray hair, no creaking bones—the weight of centuries bore down on him. As he gazed at the midnight sun, a harbinger of his impending retreat to his coffin, m/n decided to indulge himself and spend more time out in the open. After all, this was the only time he could enjoy the new wonders of the world, yet this was not just any ordinary day. Tonight marked the anniversary of m/n's transformation into one of the undead.

Reflecting on the past, m/n reminisced about the persuasive allure of Lestat, the vampire who had sweet-talked his way around rationality, promising a life brimming with pleasure and abundance. In the initial decades, it was a splendid existence.

Lestat had a way of making m/n feel truly special. The once mundane aspects of mortal life were now elevated to extraordinary heights in the vampiric realm, and Lestat made sure m/n felt the full extent of his newfound powers.

There were moonlit strolls through shadowy alleyways, where Lestat shared the secrets of their immortal world. He spoke of the intoxicating thrill of the hunt, the taste of forbidden blood, and the freedom that came with transcending the limitations of mortality. Lestat created a world where every moment felt like an eternity of bliss. However, m/n should've known his novelty would wear off.

Lestat was a man driven by desire and ambition, wanting to taste the newest and finest things in life. What would m/n offer to such a monster who had already taken everything? So when Lestat's attention was redirected to another human named Louis, m/n felt pain.

He was angry at Lestat for casting him aside, yet the blame couldn't be placed on him alone—m/n should've known that a creature such as Lestat could never be tied down, despite how much he proclaimed to love you. So, when the ethereally beautiful vampire introduced Louis as his newest creation, a realization dawned on m/n. Lestat wasn't his anymore.

And Louis, the unwitting figure in their love triangle, bore no blame for his and Lestat's fallout. M/n grappled with conflicting emotions, attempting to cultivate hatred towards the vampire who seemed to have stolen Lestat away. Yet, against his own efforts, all he could muster was pity. For as much as Louis and Lestat showcased their 'love' through tender kisses and clandestine touches, m/n saw through the facade.

In the quiet moments when Lestat thought no one was watching, m/n observed the flickers of longing and boredom in the vampire's blue eyes. It became evident that the passion between Louis and him, while palpable, was also marred by perpetual restlessness. Not even months into Louis' stay did the cracks in their relationship begin to manifest themselves.

"Out with Antoinette?" Louis would hiss, the accusatory tone hanging heavy in the air, ensuing another argument between the two. As the discord between Louis and Lestat escalated, M/n found himself unwittingly becoming a refuge for Lestat. The vampire, seeking solace in the familiar, turned to M/n whenever the storms of conflict raged with Louis. In those moments of anger, Lestat was M/n's again, yet it also drove him to the brink of madness and unhappiness.

He had days, if lucky, where things would go back to how they were—a semblance of the love they once shared. But whenever the storms settled between Louis and Lestat, m/n would be relegated to loneliness once more. One day, unable to bear the emotional rollercoaster any longer, he confronted Lestat. The air was thick with tension as they stood facing each other, the weight of unspoken words hanging heavily between them.

"You can't keep doing this, Lestat." M/n pleaded, the frustration and anguish evident in his voice. "Keep me here when you clearly love Louis. How would you like it if I were to do the same?"

M/n regretted saying anything as Lestat's eyes darkened, and a snarl emerged on the vampire's lips. In a sudden, swift motion, Lestat pinned m/n to the wall, his grip firm and possessive. The room seemed to close in as Lestat hissed, "You belong to me."

"I don't belong to anyone." M/n retorted, anger engulfing his body.

Lestat laughed coldly in his face, grip tightening, he smirked. "That's where you're wrong, love," he taunted, his voice dripping with both amusement and cruelty. "I own you…"

The possessive declaration sent a chill down m/n's spine, his anger giving way to a growing sense of unease. Lestat's dark laughter reverberated in the confined space, echoing the shifting power dynamics between them. Trapped against the wall, m/n felt the weight of Lestat's control, a dominance that left him conflicted and vulnerable.

Lestat's smirk widened, his gaze predatory as he continued, "You're mine to protect, mine to control. I've tasted your blood, felt your heartbeat sync with mine. You're bound to me in ways you can't comprehend."

M/n, trapped against the wall, felt a cold chill run down his spine at Lestat's words. The once cherished intimacy between them now felt like chains, binding M/n to a fate he hadn't fully understood.

In a moment of intense emotion, Lestat, fueled by the strange dance of power and desire, leaned in, capturing m/n's lips in a possessive kiss. The meeting of their mouths was both a declaration of dominance and a desperate attempt of Lestat's to re-establish his control over m/n.

Perhaps, in his pursuit of novelty and excitement, he had unknowingly neglected his first creation in favor of the alluring Louis. However, what neither m/n nor Louis knew was that, hidden beneath the layers of Lestat's charismatic exterior, there existed a capacity for love.

As Lestat's lips sought dominance in the heated kiss, there was an intricate play of emotions beneath the surface.

The neglect that m/n had felt wasn't an absence of love but rather a reflection of Lestat's internal struggle to navigate the complexities of immortal relationships. Lestat, a vampire with a history of numerous lovers, had reveled in the pleasures of passion without feeling a deep emotional connection—until m/n entered the picture. Even his intense relationship with Louis didn't compare to the profound connection he shared with m/n.

As the intensity of their heated kiss began to wane, Lestat pulled away, his eyes fixed on m/n with a mixture of possessiveness and intensity. "If you dare to run away," Lestat whispered, "Know that I'll drag you back to my side. And that's a promise."

[wanderingskemetic]

🧮Subtle Djehuty Worship📝

Greatly inspired by @khaire-traveler's wonderful subtle worship series, which can be found here.

Write letters to people even if you don't send them, they could be to him

Keep a notebook of your writings

Study especially for fun/out of curiosity

Doodle, especially him and his symbols

Read books you like

Learn a new language particularly those related to Egypt and it's history

Do some subtle heka or other magic

Develop a coded language and write prayers, devotions, etc. to him in this (only if you feel it's safe)

Have ibis, baboon, papyrus, or moon imagry

Carry a picture of him in your wallet, pocket, phone case, etc. or as a phone or computer wallpaper

Make a playlist or listen to songs that remind you of him or you think he'd like

Learn about and work to uphold Ma'at

Make a collage/moodboard/pinterest board/similar collection of photos and images you associate with him, especially if some of the images are your own

Learn about healthy conflict resolution skills; try to implement these in your next conflict

Learn about and practice emotional regulation

Make a list of your personal goals; work towards achieving them one step at a time

Write down quotes you hear and enjoy

Invest in your studies both formal and informal; do homework, check out books from the library, save up to go to school, etc.

Donate to educational or medical focused nonprofits

Learn about different types of divination especially those that are less well known (bibliomancy, augury, pyromancy, etc.)

Greet him in the evening as the moon rises

Observe the phases of the moon, and learn what each one means

Keep a dream journal; try to interpret your dreams

Take your medications, if any; take medications as needed

Help others with their studies (form a study group, help a child with their homework, etc.)

Take care of your body physically to the best of your ability (shower, eat well, get a good amount of sleep, etc.)

Practice compromising with others and making compromises (within reason)

Keep a journal of your thoughts and different events

Use a planner or otherwise organize your day

Practice truthfulness and keep your promises

Take a walk in the moonlight (safely)

Invest in your future; set up a savings account, work on getting more exercise, find or spend time working on a hobby that brings you joy, etc.

Make your own paper or ink to write with; experiment with different papers, inks, and writing implements

Be curious about the world around you and the way things work; encourage yourself to question things

Doing activities in line with the lunar calendar

Assert your boundaries clearly; learn what your boundaries are

Sharpen your mind; play memory or mentally stimulating games

Work on communication skills; practice healthy forms of communication

Go to a museum

Learn about/research health conditions that you or your loved ones have; get a better understanding of these things

Learn about your healthcare options and medical rights (HIPPA in the US)

I may add more to this list in the future. Suggestions are always appreciated.

Link to the Kemetic Subtle Worship Masterpost

[cryptidghostgirl]

The Line (Port Mafia!Dazai x Port Mafia!Reader)

Pairing: Dazai Osamu x Reader

Description: Something is there, but if they both pretend it isn't, then everything is okay.

Warnings: Angsty but also more fluff than angst I think, mafia stuff, bomb talk, its Dazai so double suicide mentioned once. Sex also mentioned in passing like once. I think that is it, please correct me if I am wrong.

Word Count: 1,262

Master Lists:

All Master Lists 

Bungou Stray Dogs Master List

Hazbin Hotel Master List 

A/N so i found a screenshot of this tumblr post of this quote on pinterest and besties,, I am running with it. I will add the quote in at the end.

Was it his hand on the small of her back? Was it the feeling of his whispered breaths against the shell of her ear? When had the line been crossed, if it had been crossed at all? Neither really seemed to know where it had even been drawn in the first place. Perhaps that was the trouble with it all.

Danger was a part of life for those unlucky enough to call themselves members of Yokohama's notorious Port Mafia. It was the only constant, in Y/n's eyes. Well, danger and Dazai, but they were kind of one in the same, weren't they?

"Belladonna."

The same low, constant hum. She looked up from her desk.

Dazai stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame with an aloof air. He'd grown quite a bit in the two years since she had met him. She supposed she must have grown as well but, somehow, he still seemed to be exactly the same. It was the calculating quality of his gaze. It was the smirk, the way the light glinted off his hair.

"That's new."

Y/n gestured towards the man with the end of the pen she grasped in her hand. Almost without thought, he raised a hand of his own to the bandage on his left cheek.

"I suppose it is."

They were never supposed to have even met one another in the first place. Their jobs were ones that should have pulled them far apart from each other's graces. He was an executive, after all, and she was just a lowly clerk. She dealt with numbers, paying off people who needed paying off, covering up the footprints of great men like him. He was supposed to send his subordinates to deal with her. That was what everyone else always did. Dazai wasn't like everyone else though, was he.

"I've got something for you." he stated, straightening up and taking a few steps into the room, his hands firmly in the pockets of his coat.

Y/n raised her eyebrows.

"What is it, another job?"

"A present."

Dazai pulled a box from his pocket, snapping it down on top of the work Y/n had splayed out over the desk's surface before her. It was large and flat. She eyed it suspiciously.

"It wont bite."

"You do."

"I said it, didn't I?"

"What is it, a bomb? Think it would be funny to watch me struggle to deal with something like that?"

"Don't give me any ideas." Dazai playfully replied.

"Is it full of anthrax? I have already told you, I have no interest in committing a double suicide."

"Just open it."

The Mafia was a dangerous place, those who worked there lead dangerous lives. There was no denying the living, breathing thing between Y/n and Dazai but... there was no place for such a creature here. Besides, neither of them would know what to do about it if there was. They had both forgotten how to be gentle long ago, were unsure if it had ever been in their nature in the first place. All that was left was the sharpness.

Hesitantly, Y/n picked the dark red box up and opened the lid. Nestled in the black velvet of the interior was a necklace. It was old, an antique locket of sorts with a few flowers engraved on its oval front.

"Nightshade." she commented.

"Made me think of you, Belladonna."

That was one of the things that helped tow the line, the invisible and complex line. Y/n never called Dazai anything other than his last name and Dazai only referred to her as 'Belladonna.' At first, the name had irritated her. It had felt like a denial of her personhood, her individuality. That was before she had known there had been a line to cross at all. She was older now, wiser. She looked back up at him.

"How sweet." she bitterly replied.

Dazai smiled his lazy smile in response. A girl could give up everything for a smile like that, even her life. Y/n wouldn't though. If she was willing to, that was mean it was all lost. They would have crossed the line long ago, if that were true. They couldn't have that. The line was what kept them safe, kept hem sheltered, kept them. He closed the distance, stepping up beside her in the space behind her desk.

"Here."

Long, slender fingers snaked around the locket's delicate chain, pulling it from its bed. Y/n's breath caught in her throat as his fingers brushed against the back of her neck, securing the necklace. It felt heavy against her chest, a foriegn weight that seemed to cut right through her skin to her bones below. Gently, he slipped a hand under her chin, tilting her face up to him.

"Perfect." he hummed.

Had they already crossed it? Was it too late? If so, what had been the deciding factor? Was it the late nights up on the roof, talking till the sun rose? Was it the knocks at her door at odd hours? Had it been their legs tangled together beneath the covers night after night, no sex required?

"Thank you."

What needed to happen, what change had to occur for them to be able to say the words that echoed in the backs of their minds?

Dazai's hand lingered on her face for a moment longer. Y/n mourned the warmth of his touch as he dragged his fingers from her.

"I have to go."

Y/n sighed, turning back to her messy desk.

"The work of a Mafioso is never complete, is it."

A statement, not a question. Dazai let out a light laugh in agreement. Y/n picked her pen back up, listening intently to his footsteps as he crossed back over to the door. At the sound of a pause, a hesitation in the pattern, she looked back up.

"Same time same place?"

She smiled. Tonight, the kitchens. Stolen food, stolen time. Stolen kisses too most likley.

"Yeah."

Belladonna. Something poisonous, something detrimental. Something completely and entirely his, if he was brave enough to take her. Dazai wasn't so sure he was, not right now at any rate. Dazai was a man who didn't like uncertainties. In fact, he avoided them at all nearly costs. He didn't know if the day would ever come when the bravery or the assurance would arrive. With things as they were now, it felt inevitable. A ticking bomb, a precariously placed glass. One wrong move, and everything would shatter.

With a curt nod, he disappeared back out into the hallway. Y/n listened to his footsteps against the carpet of the hall as he retreated, picturing the way he must look in the moment, wondering where he was off to.

The line was there, the brick wall between them. They both knew it. How far was too far? Was it holding hands as they walked down the street, checking to make sure no one could see? They already did that. They already did a lot of things. Maybe... maybe the line would dissolve when the fear left or, maybe, when it felt more manageable, they would be able to cross it, if they hadn't already.

How far was too far?

Y/n reached her hand up to her chest, fingering the cool silver of the locket where it hung at her collar. Maybe, just maybe, they had gone to far already. Maybe the world was already falling down around them, they just hadn't noticed it yet.

----

Here is the quote that inspired this:

[readabookknightly]

Informal Introduction: In completing todays Tumblr, I'd first like to congratulate myself on choosing a meme, because truly, I had to make a new Pinterest board, P&P memes may be my new official passion.

Actual (Formal) Introduction:

I found this image of a retweet/imagined scenario between Elizabeth and Darcy on Pinterest (the link will be at the bottom of this). It was used as a humorous and sarcastic commentary on their relationship. When I saw it however, I thought that this image hints at one of the main qualities of Pride and Prejudice that helped make it one of her most famous, if not best, novels: feminism.

To start this analysis, I'd first point the reader back to the last Jane Austen novels we've read in class. More specifically, the dynamics between women and men in Austen's novels. We've discussed a lot about the idea of feminism in class, and one of the more reoccurring themes of those discussions, was that Austen wasn't really a feminist. And perhaps, when reading Sense and Sensibility or Northanger Abbey, that line of thinking makes sense. But I would urge someone who believes in this, to look at Pride and Prejudice and understand just why Austen is the feminine figure and power-author that she is. Because, while yes, compared to the standards of feminism that exist today, Austen's 'progressiveness' does not hold a candle. But compared to the other writers of her time, Jane Austen lead a charge of encouraging women to know they had a choice.

Because when it comes down to it, I believe this image, while a silly joke about Fitzwilliam Darcy's fear of Elizabeth and inability to speak without insulting her, is also a picture of a power dynamic that is opposite of any of Austen's other heroines. In Pride and Prejudice, what's so intriguing about Elizabeth Bennet as our heroine is that she retain's control over her life, but also her standing in society.

In both Northanger Abbey and Sense and Sensibility, the female heroines live their lives waiting for a man to step in. Catherine spends her year hoping Tilney's intentions are good, and Elinor waits for months, praying Edward Ferrars will come back to her. Both women are enchanted by their future husbands in the first 100 pages of the novel, and both women pine over those men for the remainder of their tales.

In contrast the first 100 pages of Pride and Prejudice involve Elizabeth Bennet experiencing the most male disenchantment of her life. And for much of the rest of her book Elizabeth expresses displeasure over any interaction with Darcy whenever she can. Where Elinor and Catherine wait for proposals from their dream men, Elizabeth scoffs in Darcy's face and leaves him out in the cold, horrified at his audacity.

But what's powerful about Elizabeth's role as a heroine, is that she is also a society woman. She does her family a great honor in her time in public, and she's not frivolous with her time or words. Austen's most profound statements of feminism are rooted in Darcy's infatuation with her heroine. It is not just for her good looks or gracefulness, but he loves her intelligence, her wit, and her refusal to back down to insults. Darcy's love for Elizabeth, while rooted in 19th century customs and expectations, was a strikingly progressive dynamic, that would have introduced many women of the time to the concepts of feminism.

The image above helps to showcase this because Darcy is unable to showcase his affection using just pretty words of appearance. He tries such methods, as a man of his stature would, and he's rejected. The core root of Elizabeth's feminism is that she won't settle for less. Darcy is forced to earn her trust and her appreciation through time, patience, and care. He's challenged to go above and beyond if he wants the happily ever after, not Elizabeth.

Pride and prejudice is a powerful novel for its time because it plays on the hearts of 19th century woman, respecting the values of traditional marriages through Jane and Mr. Bingly's happiness, but simultaneously introducing them to a new idea through Elizabeth and Darcy.

[littlemisspascal]

Bitter Ends Turn Sweet in Time

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Female Reader

Word Count: 7k+

Summary: There’s not a single day in a whole year that isn’t bookmarked by a memory of him. And you, you remember all of them.

Rating: T

Warnings: Pokémon au (but not 100% true to canon, just elements + some characters), time skips in non-linear manner, fluff, angst, bittersweet ending, storms, language, Reader and Frankie are same age + grow up together, high school au ish(?), inspired by 500 Days of Summer + Song of Achilles' 'name one hero who was happy' scene + this quote by photographer David Alan Harvey:

"Don't shoot what it looks like. Shoot what it feels like."

- Reader has no official name and no physical traits described in detail. However, she is mentioned to have hair, a career, wear a dress (no description), and eat sandwiches

Author Note: I've been wanting to write a Pokémon au for a long, long, long time and I've also been wanting to write a non-linear fic for a long, long, long time as well so this is the result of both those wants combining forces *awkwardly throws it into the universe* It is what it is.

-- all moodboard photos found on pinterest

-- shinx, luxio, luxray // pikachu photo references

Special thanks to @beecastle for beta reading and encouraging me through my breakdowns 💜

Day 1,695

Luxray’s a silent wall of black and blue fur for your body to brace against as the sky bleeds a deep shade of orange, and you know he knows. Doesn’t even have to use his x-ray vision to confirm what’s etched into every line of your expression. Anguish—when it’s real and unbearable and deeply-rooted—is impossible to hide. Everyone who looks at you will know. 

Everyone except the one pair of brown eyes that’ll never look your way again.

“I’m such an idiot,” you say quietly, and it’s embarrassing how thick the lump of emotion is lodged in your throat. You wipe at your nose with your sleeve. “So damn stupid.”

Luxray lets out a low growl, chiding in nature, as if to say don’t talk shit about yourself. 

“He was never going to stay,” you continue, ignoring the vibration rattling your bones. “But I got my hopes up anyways. What we’ve accomplished these last few weeks together, I thought there was a chance…a slim one, you know? That maybe–maybe we could actually stick together this time.”

And you don’t realize you’re crying until Luxray’s twisting his head to nuzzle against your temple, encouraging you to bury your face into the thick fur along his chest and shoulders. With your eyes squeezed shut, you can almost block out the all-encompassing numbness emanating from the cavity your heart used to reside in.

“He’s gone…” you choke out through sobs, grabbing fistfuls of Luxray’s inky black mane. “And I think it’s permanent this time.”

Day 1

The first day of classes at Uva Academy is a whirlwind of meeting teachers, racing from one floor to the next against the clock, and making sure you never lose track of Shinx in the chaos of it all, but when the last bell finally rings, you feel no sting of regret about coming here. 

You split a sandwich with Shinx underneath a tree in the school courtyard, brain buzzing with the overload of information absorbed throughout the day. Maybe signing up for a full schedule of classes was a bit excessive, but unlike most of your fellow students who have some semblance of a plan for their futures your next steps are plagued with uncertainty. There are so many paths one can take with their Pokémon—the course of a Trainer, a Coordinator, a Professor, a Ranger, the list goes on and on—you don’t know which direction to take.

When you lock eyes with a boy with brown eyes across the yard, there’s nothing special about the moment. No sparks, no forgetting how to breathe. He’s just a boy with a Pikachu on his shoulder and a dimpled grin on his face.

“I saw you in Mr. Jacq’s class,” he says in lieu of a greeting when he draws closer, purple Academy tie loose and crooked around his neck. Recognition stirs in the back of your mind, a flash of dark brown curls towards the back of the room spotted before taking your seat at the front. 

Actually, now that you think about it…

“Weren’t you in Ms. Dendra’s class too?” you wonder, passing the last bite of sandwich to Shinx, his little body wiggling eagerly. “And Ms. Raifort’s…?”

“Yeah, I, uh, I don’t really know what I want to do yet.” He scuffs at the ground with his shoe, grin turning a bit crooked at the corner, strangely endearing in its awkwardness. “I figure life’s short, you know? Why not try as many things as you can when you have the chance?”

“Right,” you agree, finding yourself smiling back. “Nothing wrong with making memories.”

"I'm Frankie, by the way."

“Nice to meet you Frankie,” you say, shaking his hand. It’s warm in your grip, firm and secure, thumb grazing over your knuckles. “Looks like we’ll be seeing a lot of each other.”

And so it starts after that—the counting of days. Days when you see him in class, when he smiles at you, when he does homework with you in the library, when he and Pikachu have a battle against you and Shinx–winner buys lunch. It’s a subconscious quirk you keep to yourself. Even after he’s gone, chasing after legends to the far corners of the earth, you still continue counting days.

Days when he crosses your mind. Days when you leave the door unlocked in case he stops by. Days when you swear you catch a whiff of his citrus shampoo on the pillowcase despite the impossibility of it.

There’s not a single day in a whole year that isn’t bookmarked by a memory of him. And you, you remember all of them.

Day 183

“I want my name in one of these books,” he tells you, Ms. Raifort’s assigned reading on the lost explorers of Area Zero spread out in front of him.

You look up from the text, fatalities and disaster and other sharp words with teeth still swimming in your head. “It won’t be easy.”

You’ve only known him six months—long enough to be certain you’ll never meet anyone else like him, but too short to realize the hidden depths of his stubborn ambition.

“No,” he agrees, mouth curling up at the corner, “but it’ll be one hell of a story.”

Day 8

The air is heavy with the sharp, pungent scent of ozone as thunder rumbles overhead. You take in the ominous black clouds, adjusting the hood of your yellow coat to better defend your hair against the pattering raindrops. Doesn’t do much to ward off the chill of the wind though.

Shinx is darting about the meadow in zigzagging lines, wet to the bone and having a blast. Pikachu follows at his heels, electricity sparking from the red circles of her cheeks before fizzling out harmlessly. If there’s any rules to this game they’re playing, you haven’t a clue. Still, their obvious excitement over the weather has you smiling despite the numbness of your toes in soggy shoes.

To your left, Frankie watches the pair of Pokémon nimbly leap over a puddle, studying their graceful movements. His dark hair is flattened against his head, curls beaten into submission, but there’s something in his eyes, a sort of wistfulness that snags your attention like a moth to a flame. 

A bolt of lightning burns a gleaming white strip across the gloomy sky, halting Shinx and Pikachu’s play as they elicit squeaks of awe, but you can’t stop looking at Frankie. He’s grinning now, a wide and ecstatic thing with his head tipped back, rain streaming down his face.

“Amazing, isn’t it? Seeing one of nature’s tantrums,” he says, voice low and wonderstruck. “My mother always said it takes someone extra special to train those who can summon such raw, uncontrollable power on cue.”

You’ve never thought of yourself as someone unusual or remarkable. Looking at him though, soaked and shivering and absolutely beaming, you think if anyone’s extra special in this world it’s him.

Day 1,987

It’s a long time before you can look through photos of him without a wound violently tearing open in your chest. Longer still before you can hear his voice on the phone. He calls more often these days, mostly because you’re knee-deep in another mystery and only a little because he misses you, and that’s okay. You can smile at his jokes and it feels real. You can love him and know better than to be in love with him.

You stay busy. You photograph every inch of the nature park on Florio, even convince Professor Mirror to let you take the NEO-ONE to some of Lental’s other islands for further research. You spend hours clicking through photos on your computer, frowning at blurry ones, printing some out for the Professor to take a closer look at as well as a few for your own personal collection of albums. 

Your coworker isn’t an intimidating figure by any means, but something about watching him study and scrutinize your pictures never fails to make your hands shake and feet shuffle. Even after all these months, practically living inside each other’s pockets at the Laboratory of Ecology and Natural Sciences (or L.E.N.S. as the Professor affectionately calls it), studying the Illumina phenomenon and all its effects, there’s a part of you still terrified it could all come crashing down.

“You’re too hard on yourself,” Professor Mirror tells you, glaring disapprovingly over the frames of his glasses. It’s not the first time you’ve heard that remark and it won’t be the last either. 

“More analyzing the photos and less analyzing me please,” you reply, nodding your head at the small stack in his hands.

He grumbles under his breath, but resumes evaluating the latest shots of your walk along Blushing Beach. There are Wingulls performing loops in the air, an Exeggutor snoozing beneath a palm tree, the splashings of a pair of Corsola playing in the waves. Luxray looking at the contents of a tide pool. A Pikachu eating a fluffruit after you’d scared her by your loud gasp, mistaking her for another of her kind. You don’t mention that tidbit to your coworker though.

That should be the last one, except then Professor Mirror’s letting out a surprised little hum, holding up a photo you never intended anyone else to ever see. Not even the subject. Especially not the subject.

It’s from your sophomore year at Uva Academy. You would call the picture ugly, edges a bit hazy due to your unsteady hands, still learning the tips and tricks of photography, except it’s Frankie. And he’s looking at you behind the lens with a fondness so sweet it makes your teeth hurt, holding a newly evolved Luxio to his chest, with windswept curls your fingers will always long to tame. 

You should’ve thrown it out a long time ago. The man in the photo isn’t the same man who will call you later tonight from half a world away just to ask how your day went and if you’re willing to admit you need his help with the Illumina project. But you’ve always been too sentimental for your own good, holding onto things until there are only scraps left, slipping through the gaps of your fingers. 

At the very least, you shouldn’t have reorganized your albums so close to your work station.

After what feels like the longest stretch of silence of your life, Professor Mirror finally says, carefully neutral as if wary of provoking a negative reaction, “Someone special, I presume?”

“It’s complicated,” is all you offer in response, snatching the picture back and telling yourself the ache behind your ribcage is a side effect of a papercut.

Day 389

Uva Academy teaches you battle strategies, the effects of Berries and how to better understand your Pokémon amongst other vital lessons to prepare students for a career outside the ancient brick walls and dorm rooms. 

It’s Frankie who teaches you how to find beauty in thunderstorms, how to enjoy each day like it’s your last, how to dream a little bit bigger, a little bit bolder—or maybe that’s something you teach each other. 

On the weekends you head into the city center together, trying different eateries and watching fellow students challenge each other on the plaza battle court. Afterwards you’ll walk along the cobblestone streets side by side, sometimes discussing classwork or pointing out items in shop windows, but usually the time is spent in companionable silence. Just sharing the same space.

You buy your first camera acting on pure impulse, drawn to it inexplicably and handing over money to the salesman in a matter of minutes. It fits in the palm of your hand, heavy and solid, buttons and knobs staring back at you, waiting to be pressed and manipulated. For the first ten or so minutes of ownership, you simply hold onto the device, studying its shape, its lens, fingertips running over the bumps and grooves.

“Well?” Frankie prompts, gentle voice breaking the silence, brown eyes flicking between your face and the camera. Pikachu echoes the question with a tiny pika?, sensing the fragility of the moment. 

“I don’t know what to do,” you answer, shoulders curling with self-consciousness. At your feet, Shinx sits on your shoe and rubs his cheek against your leg comfortingly.

“Well,” he hums, a teasing smile growing on his lips as he presses a button. “Maybe start with turning it on first.”

“Shut up.” You swat at him, but there’s no real heat. “I meant, I don’t know what to take a photo of.”

“It doesn’t matter what the sight is,” Frankie tells you, grabbing hold of your hands and raising them up until the camera’s in front of your face. He steps back and you peek at him through the viewfinder, watching as he spreads his arms out wide with Pikachu still happily perched on his shoulder. “What’s important is how it makes you feel.”

You take a breath, taking a moment to hold the shutter button until it focuses, and then take the photo. No count down, no say cheese!—you simply heed his advice, focusing on how it makes you feel.

The preview screen asks if you’d like to keep the picture or delete it. Your thumb hovers over the buttons.

Focused on the way Frankie’s hair has a golden aura in the light, how Pikachu’s nose scrunches when she’s grinning, you nearly jump out of your skin when he’s suddenly at your side again, wondering, “What do I make you feel, shutterbug?”

Like I’m falling and flying at the same time, you think, quick and startling. A bolt of lightning amongst storm clouds.

You press save.

“Like spending a hundred bucks wasn’t a total mistake.”

Day 448

You take a seat in the cafeteria across from Yovanna and her Sylveon. You’re lucky she shares the same lunch hour as you. Even more lucky she likes you enough to also share her space. Her knack for securing a table each day despite the scrambling rush of hungry students is a gift from the gods. Or maybe it’s a perk of being the president of the Academy’s student council.

“You haven’t stopped smiling for days.” She points with her fork at your grin, a giddy, bubbly thing not even Ms. Tyme’s pop quiz last period could stifle. “Spill it. Who’re you crushing on? Is he a student here? You got a picture?”

“Not with me.” It’s a lie, ever since you bought your camera it’s been glued to your person and there’s always at least one picture of him stored within the device’s gallery of Luxio shots and library aesthetic and other things that make you happy. “He is a student here though.”

Yovanna drops her fork onto her plate, jostling the pieces of fruit waiting to be eaten. Sylveon catches a flying strawberry midair by jumping in her seat and landing neatly on four paws like it’s a regular trick to perform. “Shut up. It’s him, isn’t it?”

You feed Luxio a pickle off your sandwich, neither confirming nor denying.

But your grin does get a little bit impossibly wider.

“Aw man, I owe Santi twenty bucks now.”

Your eyes narrow shrewdly. “Did you seriously make a bet?”

“You two are joined at the hip, of course I did.” Yovanna leans back in her chair, arms behind her head, not a single hint of shame for her actions. “Santi said you’d realize you had feelings for him before winter break. I thought it’d take you until the end of the semester ‘cause you’ve got the self-awareness of a piece of concrete most days.”

“Rude.” She dodges the crumpled napkin you toss at her with a laugh.

“Hey, this is a good development. Now you just gotta keep the momentum going and tell him how you feel. You’re perfect for each other.”

Tucking back into her meal, she misses the brief slip in your smile.

“Yeah.”

Day 8

Ms. Dendra is the only teacher without a classroom, preferring to use the battlefield in the middle of the courtyard for her lessons rather than a whiteboard. She weaves along the line of students with her Medicham, offering suggestions and correcting forms to make the most out of their Pokémons’ moves. You keep one eye on her drawing steadily closer and one on Shinx pawing at the ground, charging up electricity in his forelegs. He still hasn’t mastered thunder shock yet, maybe Ms. Dendra can–

“Storm’s coming tonight,” a voice drawls behind you, a curious blend of casual and enthusiastic.

You turn around, finding Frankie standing there looking up at the sky. The dark gray clouds do seem indicative of bad weather, now that he’s mentioned it. Rain is definitely on its way. 

And then he asks, a little sudden, “You ever seen one up close?”

A strange question. Still, you think about it, searching your childhood. All you remember are memories of cowering under the blankets in your bed and playing in puddles the next morning when the monstrous rumbling and harsh flashes had long passed. You’ve seen rain up close, felt the drops on your skin, inhaled the scent of petrichor deep into your lungs. But storms? 

“No,” you shake your head, shivering as the temperature seems to drop. “Never.”

He hums, a bland note that could mean anything. At your feet, Shinx and Pikachu sit and stare at each other, little sparks of blue and yellow static crackling in the air between them like morse code. 

“No wonder you’re having trouble with your partner. Can’t teach him about electricity when you’ve never seen it in action.”

“That’s not how training works,” you retort defensively. “Also storms aren’t exactly harmless, in case you forgot. They’re loud and dangerous and—”

“Beautiful,” Frankie cuts in with such firm conviction you reel back in surprise. “Absolutely, breathtakingly beautiful.” A pause follows, and you hate the smirk that grows on his face, how it taunts you, how it makes his eyes glitter with mischief. “Or maybe not. I could be lying. Only one way to find out for sure.” 

A raindrop lands on your cheek. Then another on your arm. And another on your nose. It’s pouring now. Students are complaining about their lesson being interrupted and Ms. Dendra’s shouting for everyone to head back inside. Through it all your eyes remain locked in an intense staring match, neither one willing to surrender.

“Fine,” you reply with a sharp jerk of your chin. “Show me.”

Day 1,448

Your internship with Professor Oak is—good. It’s the start of a brand new chapter in your life, except the last chapter ended on a terrible note and the upcoming pages are terrifyingly blank if you fail to impress your new boss, so. Yeah.

You get along with the Professor’s other intern, a local boy named Will. He teaches you how to drive the ZERO-ONE around the sanctuary. You spend hours out on the trails, memorizing everything about the wild Pokémon who call the island home. You enjoy the assignments Professor Oak gives you, staying busy, filling up albums with photos and journals with research notes. 

But when it’s quiet, when you’re staring up at the ceiling waiting for sleep to come…you’ve never felt more lonely in your life. Even with Luxray within reach, loyal and constant, there’s a persistent ache you can’t shake. A loose thread dangling in your mind, tormenting you, and you know if you were to tug on it exactly where it would lead.

Everything leads back to him.

Frankie hasn’t tried to call you. Hasn’t had any contact with you since graduation. Not even a postcard from whatever corner of the world he’s trying to accomplish his dreams. 

You haven’t tried to call him either. And yes, it’s true communication is a two-way street, but he’s the one who left and took your heart with him. Why should you give him more of yourself? You hate yourself for even contemplating picking up the phone.

You hate yourself even more for wondering what your relationship would’ve been like if you’d gone with him. If it’d hurt less to just have stayed friends. If you’d been better off never knowing him at all. If, if, if…

Day 485

The problem is, you think your feelings for Frankie are just a little bit stronger than a crush. You’re pretty sure you’re in love with him. Or at least halfway there. 

As much as you hate to admit it, Yovanna wasn’t wrong saying you have the self-awareness of a piece of cement. You don’t know for certain if the fluttery Butterfree sensation in your stomach or galloping heartbeat whenever Frankie smiles at you is love. But you are certain he’s gotten under your skin, triggering as many irritations as he is encouraging new ways of growth. You’re a better person, you think, simply by knowing him.

You also think it’s actually kind of scary to imagine something so strong and life-transforming could be anything else but love. Regardless, you hope it stays with you forever. This precious, nameless thing.

It won’t be until many days later—until you know what it’s like to kiss him, and hold his face between your palms, the heat of his breath tingling against your skin; until he’s fluent in myths and legends and fables, swearing he’ll be the one to make them truths and facts and verities; until you can’t picture a future without him in it, not a happy one, at least—you’ll realize you do love him. And he loves you, too, as it turns out.

But nothing lasts forever. Someone’s always got to be the first to let go. 

Day 1,375

You receive an offer for an internship with Professor Oak in Pallet Town to help him complete his Pokémon Report by taking photos on a nearby island sanctuary. It’s the opportunity of a lifetime to work with such an esteemed researcher, but thinking about graduation creeping up, about leaving behind this realm of familiarity now that you’ve learned everything Uva Academy has to teach, it’s—moving forward is harder than you anticipate.

It doesn’t help that Frankie's becoming more and more restless, unable to stand still as if it physically pains him to do so. No matter how many walks around the city, how many storms chased after, he’s always looking out towards the horizon, aura so thick with discontentment it’s as if he’s physically cloaked in it. 

Lately the only moments he seems to settle within his own skin are when he’s talking with Ms. Raifort, discussing ancient prophecies and ruins scattered around the globe. You don’t understand it, his passionate fascination–no, obsession with mythology. Why not let sleeping dogs lie? 

Frankie won’t talk to you about the future, evading the topic like a cunning Nickit. Still you cling to his hand, to hope, to the belief love conquers all, until the morning of graduation he comes to your dorm room and stares over your shoulder rather than meet your gaze. Even Pikachu hides her face in his curls, ears lowered despondently.

You let him in, the beginnings of dread stirring in your stomach, sensing whatever he’s got to say will have irreparable consequences.

“Did you have breakfast yet?” You gesture towards the kitchen, an unspoken can this wait? laced within the question.

“Not feeling very hungry today,” he answers, glancing about the room aimlessly. No, it can’t.

“That’s a first.” You take a seat on the sofa next to Luxray, grounding yourself by stroking a hand along his back. “You gonna tell me what’s on your mind or are you gonna make me guess?”

At that, Frankie finally turns to you, and his torn expression fractures something delicate inside of you, coldness flooding your lungs.

“I’ve been thinking. About us.”

“What about us?”

“I love you.” There’s no sweetness to the words. No tenderness. They are words of blood, of pain, scraping against his throat on their way out. “I’ve loved you from day one and I’ll love you ten thousand more. But what I want, what you want—it’s not the same thing. And it’s only going to hurt the longer we keep pretending otherwise.”

“Stop, please don’t—” your voice cracks, the cold gripping your heart now. Please don’t say it. Please don’t do this. “We’re—we’re good together. You know we are.”

“We were,” he amends, voice so unbearably gentle it’s a jagged blade against your soul. “We were so good. But we’re not ready for what comes next. We’ve become thunder and lightning, one ahead of the other. Our timing is off, shutterbug.”

Day 765

It’s drizzling a little when you return to campus. You shiver in your wet dress, grimacing as you accidentally step in a puddle, thoroughly soaking your flats and bare feet. Hopefully you won’t slip on the stairs and break your neck. That’d be the cherry on top of this disappointing evening.

You just want to shower, put on your comfiest pajamas, and fall asleep as fast as possible. 

Except when you reach your floor there’s a figure curled up on the floor outside your door, fast asleep with a snoring Pikachu curled on his chest.

“Hey, sleeping beauty.” You nudge at Frankie’s knee with your wet shoe, raising an eyebrow at him as he jerks awake, blinking rapidly. “What’re you doing here?”

“Oh, you’re back,” he says through a yawn, stretching his arms over his head. Pikachu grunts, displeased at the movement and sounds, and stubbornly curls into a tighter ball, forcing him to cradle her in the nook of his arm as he stands up. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep. I just–I wanted to make sure you got back from your date okay. How did it go?”

Your date, Tom, is in Mr. Hassel’s art class with you. He invited you to see a new photography exhibit at the city’s museum. He was nice, if a little overzealous, and seeing lovely displays of art  seemed like a better way to spend the evening instead of once again hopelessly pining over your best friend. So, you’d said yes, changed into a nice dress, and swore off any and all yearning.

Except that’s exactly what you ended up doing anyways. 

Every time a photo left you breathless, you’d instinctively turn to look for brown eyes that weren’t there. Every joke Tom made you’d compare it to one of Frankie’s. Throughout the entire evening, you couldn’t stop your thoughts drifting back towards the Academy, wondering what he was doing.

You weren’t surprised Tom cut the date short, correctly sensing your heart just wasn’t into it. Still stung a bit though watching him leave you behind to join up with some other classmates hanging out in the plaza.

“Poorly,” you answer with a slight grimace.

“Oh.” Frankie blinks, looking at a loss for additional words. He’s wearing the hoodie he got from his trip to Montenevera over the holiday break and sweatpants, warm and rumpled and cozy, a complete contrast to your entire wardrobe. “Did he–did he hurt you? Because if he did anything inappropriate, I swear–”

“What? No, no, nothing like that happened.” You shake your head, ignoring the flutter of your heartbeat, touched at his protectiveness. He’s still staring at you, and you know he’s not going to let this slide under the rug. “Relax, tough guy. Tom was fine. I was the problem.”

“Tauros shit,” he immediately rejects the notion. “You could never be a problem.”

The hallway feels too hot all of the sudden despite the icy raindrops still clinging to your skin. “That’s sweet,” you say, trying to flash a grin except the muscles in your face refuse to cooperate. It feels stiff. Forced. “You say that to all the girls?”

His mouth tugs upwards into a smile, dimpled and boyish. “Once or twice,” he says, “but I only mean it with you.”

It’s dangerous and stupid to get your hopes up, but there’s something about the quietness, something about his brown eyes and his nearness, that makes you take a leap of faith. Makes you think screw it and reach for his free hand, lacing your fingers together.

“I was the problem,” you tell him softly, watching his expression sober, “because I kept looking for you.”

Silence follows, interrupted by a quiet snore from Pikachu. 

Then, just as softly, Frankie says for a second time, “Oh.”

You swallow, feeling like you can’t breathe. “Yeah.”

“Silly girl, you didn’t need to look.” He squeezes your hand, leans in just enough to bump his nose against yours. “I’ve always been here.”

Day 1,375

Later, you won’t remember the particulars of how the rest of the conversation played out. There are words, so many words. Angry and inconsolable, spat out through clenched teeth and pleaded with numb lips. Tears, too. So many damn tears it’s a wonder you don’t drown yourself.

You will remember how he looks at you though. Brown eyes deep and golden, reflecting the morning light streaming through the window. He’s beautiful, and you think that’s the final straw of it all, the definitive proof that even as he’s ripping out your heart you will never feel anything less for him than love. 

No passage of time or miles of distance will ever change that. You know this like you know the sun will rise tomorrow, and the next day, and the one after that. 

Still, this certainty doesn’t stitch up the gaping, bleeding hole in your sternum.

No, that self-healing won’t begin until many, many days later.

Day 610 

In another life, if you hadn’t discovered your love of photography, you think you would have been a great astronomer. You know each of the constellations’ names, the best times during the year to spot them, even the tales assigned to them.

Tonight, the night sky is full of stars in every direction you look, not even the distant city lights strong enough to overpower their shine. You lie on your back in the soft meadow grass, hands resting on your stomach, the scent of wildflowers as thick in the air as the fireflies Luxio and Pikachu chase after. To your left, he mimics your pose, except he’s got an arm pillowed under his head, silent except for his breathing.

“There’s Kingler, cursed to hold up his heavy claw for eternity,” you say eventually, raising a hand to trace the starry outline with your fingertip. “Cubone’s next to him, forever mourning his mother.”

He remains silent. You turn your head to look at him, discovering he is deeply absorbed in his thoughts. Physically, you could easily reach out for his hand, but the blankness in his eyes suggests internally he’s half a world away. Somewhere you can’t follow. An irrational spark of jealousy burns hot in your veins, upset your presence isn’t enough of an anchor to keep him locked in the present moment.

You emit a quiet sigh, mentally rolling your eyes at your own childishness, and start to turn back to the sky when his voice catches you off guard, asking, “You ever notice they’re all tragedies?”

“Huh?”

“The myths behind the constellations.” He looks at you then, eyes dim with an emotion you can’t recognize. “Can you name one with a happy ending?”

You think about Pinsir, exiled due to his uncontrollable rage; Koffing, releasing toxic gases as he dies; Dugtrio, punished by an angry Groudon for gouging too many holes in the earth. The list grows longer, the tales grow sadder.

“No,” you say at last. “I guess not.”

He shrugs a shoulder, like it’s nothing, like his next words aren’t going to hurt something fierce. “That’s because happy endings are the biggest myth of all.”

Day 1,375

He kisses you. It is perfect and excruciating all at once. His hand is cupping your cheek, and his touch is so tender and intimately familiar you can’t stop yourself from indulging and it’s cruel of him to leave you like this. Shattered and wanting. Falling and flying.

But when Frankie’s right, he’s right.

This split in your paths has been a long time coming. You’d just refused to read the writing on the wall, content to keep counting the days, pretending the number would stretch on into infinity.

Infinity is just another word for forever though.

And there’s truth in that old saying: when you love someone—

“I love you,” he says again at the door. His eyes drift over your face, as if memorizing every detail. “And I’m proud of you. Remember that.” There’s the briefest of glimpses of tears in his eyes before he’s wrapping you in a hug, so tight your ribs painfully protest. You savor every second of it. “This isn’t the last of us. We’ll meet again, I swear it. One day, shutterbug.”

—you let them go.

Day 1,669

You’ve been dreading his arrival, dreading how he might look at you. What might be different. What, if anything, might be the same. 

All communication thus far has been directly with Professor Oak. You haven’t heard a single peep even though your number’s stayed the same. Even though you know he knows you’re here. 

Luxray stays close as the hour draws closer, trying to soothe your nervous energy. You stroke his mane, eyes flicking between your computer, the window, and then back again. The cursor blinks on the screen, waiting for you to finish adding the last details to the report you’ve been developing on the Pokémon signs you and Will discovered. Bizarre occurrences where the environment manifests the likeness of specific Pokémon—always the same ones in the same places. But why they existed and what they meant remained unsolved mysteries robbing you of sleep.

It had been the Professor's idea to invite another set of eyes to examine the clues after months of no solid progress. For every one step made forward it felt like the universe would shove you five steps backwards, the hidden connection remaining just out of your reach.

If you had known Professor Oak and Ms. Raifort were old friends, that she would’ve recommended her favorite pupil…well, you’re not sure if anything would’ve really changed. What fate wants, fate gets one way or another.

Frankie arrives at eventide, bringing the warmth of the fading sun into the lab with him. He looks…unchanged. Maybe a little broader, thicker with muscle from his journeys. But still familiar in all the ways that matter. You wonder if the same can be said for yourself. 

He’s looking at you, and it’s—it’s less painful than you expected. No tight band wrapped around your middle, no spontaneous bursting of tears. He’s just a man with a Pikachu on his shoulder and a dimpled grin on his face.

“Hey shutterbug,” he says, and it feels abruptly like slow motion, like you’re watching through someone else’s eyes as he comes closer, closer, closer and pulls you into a tight embrace. His arms are just as strong as you remember them, memories of graduation screaming in the back of your mind and you’re in your dorm room again watching him walk out of your life with your heart in tow.

You want to…

(kiss him, hit him, hold him, scream at him)

You want too many things.

“Hey,” you echo lamely as he pulls back. If Frankie hears the faintest of quivers in your voice, he thankfully doesn’t show a sign of it. You shoot a small grin at Pikachu, mouth stretching wider when she returns it with a cheerful pika pi, waving her paw. “Ready to help solve a mystery?”

“I always wanted to make history.” He’s smirking that same damn smirk, an intense pang of nostalgia striking you. Your fingers twitch, wishing you had your camera. “But I think it’s better this way, yeah?”

“What way?”

Distantly, you’re aware of Professor Oak and Will watching the conversation ping-ponging back and forth, both smart enough to pick up on the unspoken something between you and Frankie. 

“Making history together,” he says, as if it’s obvious. “We make a good team, you and I.”

The words bounce around inside your head for a moment. A good team. Is that all we are? is what you want to ask, but the answer’s a double-edged sword shoved between your ribs no matter how he phrases it. 

So you swallow the question down and bury it. 

“C’mon,” you gesture towards your computer, “I’ll show you what we’ve got so far.”

Day 128

Winter sweeps in, all frigid winds and frosted windows. Together you stay at the Academy during the holiday break. It’s days of no homework, snowball fights, and parka coats. Nights spent by the fireplace, hot chocolates topped with whipped cream, wishing you could bottle these memories in a jar and keep them on a shelf.

If Frankie knew about it, he would say Jirachi heard your wish, but it’s your opinion that fate’s just got a funny sense of humor. Either way, a few years down the line you’ll have the collection of memories you desired, almost all of them starring him. They won’t be kept in fragile jars, but in captured photographs unaffected by the withering flow of time. Little glimpses of a happy life, and how much you've lost.

Day 2,000 

You kiss Frankie on the front deck of the L.E.N.S. the night before he’s scheduled to leave. It’s stupid and impulsive, but he’s just right there in front of you, bathed in starlight and high off the elation that comes with solving another Pokémon mystery, further securing his place amongst the pages of historic exploration, a legend in his own lifetime, and there’s no thoughts in your head so—you kiss him. 

It isn’t your first kiss, but it feels like something new. He’s got stubble now, you’re wearing a lab coat—little details of proof you’re far from the kids you used to be. He smells the same though, like coffee and evergreens and fresh rain. The quiet, awed exhale of your name, like you’re something wonderful, something mythical come true, is the same too. 

And for the briefest of moments, you can almost imagine you’re together again.

But in the end it’s just a kiss, not a time machine. 

Day 1,762

“For someone with a new career, you don’t look very excited,” Will says, knocking his shoulder against yours good-naturedly. You try to summon up a smile, but it isn’t fooling anyone.

Professor Oak’s treating you both to a fancy dinner at a restaurant you can’t pronounce the name of, celebrating the news of your new job as an official field research photographer working alongside Professor Mirror in Florio. It’s an amazing step forward, resulting from the success of the Rainbow Cloud discovery with Frankie, certain to give your name another added boost of recognition in the photography community. 

“I am,” you say, remembering how you’d nearly passed out when you received the offer. Another attempt at a grin yields better results. “It’s gonna be great.”

Will tilts his head, a knowing look in his eyes. “You’re thinking about him. Again.”

“Not intentionally.” Your lips curl into a rueful grimace, fingers twisting together in your lap. “He just…never leaves my thoughts.”

Frankie told you before he left he didn’t have a home, not anymore, too much of a restless spirit to stay in one place. You wonder if his answer would be different, if he knew it’s been 1,762 days and every one of them he’s spent occupying your head.

“Even when he’s gone and left you behind?” From anyone else, the question would’ve been harsh, but your friend’s eyes are kind, full of empathy. 

There’s a second where you contemplate lying, but you can’t. Not to him, and not to yourself.

“Especially then.”

Day 2,000

“Sorry.” It comes out of your mouth stilted—not because you don’t mean it, but because your heart’s beating like a thunderstorm. A wildness you haven’t felt in years.

“I’ve never needed an apology from you.” Frankie looks at you softly, the brown of his eyes getting lost in the dark. “Two thousand. Can you believe it? Seems like just yesterday I watched you walk into class.”

You forget sometimes that he’s the sentimental type too when it comes to those he cares about. It’s why he doesn’t give Pikachu a Thunderstone, and why he only knows how to play one song on a guitar, his mother’s favorite. How sweet it is, to learn he must care about you to keep count, maybe even love you a little bit still.

“Frankie,” you start, dropping your forehead onto his shoulder. His nearness is a comfort as much as it is a distraction, but this conversation is long overdue by hundreds of days. “What are we?”

“You tell me.” A hand comes to rest on your waist, a searing brand through the fabric of your clothes. “What do you want us to be?”

You think about the question for a long moment, wondering what words pack enough meaning to give the answer it deserves.

What you want is another storm to chase, another constellation to trace. What you want is for your hands to brush during walks, never having to hear his voice on the end of a phone again because he’s right there by your side. What you want is everything that once was to align in perfect harmony with the immediate now.

“I want us to be together.”

“We are.”

“No, we’re not,” you murmur, staring down at the mud stains on his boots. 

“Listen, shutterbug,” his hands move to your head, one tilting up your chin and the other gently palming your neck, forcing you to meet his gaze, “a lot can happen in two thousand days–”

“I know, I know.”

His fingers spasm, like he’s resisting the urge to tug on your hair, eyes sharpening at the interruption. “A lot can happen in two thousand days,” he repeats, and you hear it this time, the heavy weight in his tone. Rarely is he this serious. “We’ve changed, we’ve grown, we’ve been on opposite ends of the earth from each other. But tonight, of all places, I’m here and you’re here.”

And maybe it really is that simple. People say lightning doesn’t strike the same place twice, but twice now you’ve watched him go and twice he’s been brought back to you. 

You reach up, wrapping your hands around his wrists, holding him there. “Do you think we’ll ever be what we were?”

“No.” He steps impossibly closer, lips brushing against your forehead. “I think one day we’ll be better.”

Better, you mouth the word. It feels like a promise, like a turning point. 

“Yeah, one day,” you agree, heartbeat steadying, matching the rhythm of his beneath your fingertips. “It’ll be worth the wait.”

[kimtaegis]

{Kimtaegis’ GFX Breakdowns, Ep. 1:

↳ SARANG/SARAM; a namgi web weave}

better late than never – I’ve mentioned that this year, I will start writing my thought process behind my graphics down in actual posts instead of hiding them in the tags of a self-reblog, both for myself and those who are interested in that, so here we go!

the first more graphic-y post of the year was a little birthday present for @outroindigo, who told me that namgi’s dynamic as well as their solo music are extremely important to her, so that was the starting point basically! I initially wanted to use a web-weave-like layout for yoongi's birthday post this year, but thought that it just fit too well for this project, since including lyrics and website screenshots made it so convenient to explain the topic. the main source of inspiration but also material source was doolsetbangtan, an incredible blog that not only translates bts' lyrics, but also gives extra insights and explanations of their word plays, references to reoccuring lyrical themes and even links to other media that are connected to the songs' content. they were a huge help, most elements that ended up in the post had been already pointed out under their sites for trivia: love, people, and people pt. 2 respectively, I pretty much only had to follow the mentions and use them!

my post starts with the first half of a quote from namjoon from his november 2016 vlive and ends with it as well (in the caption) to tie the whole set together. I tried to organize the elements in a way that even someone who has never heard of the whole live/love/sarang/saram thing can easily follow and understand it, while also maintaining a pleasant overall layout and colour change (planning that took quite some time, I tell you). the trivia: love lyrics panel is a screenshot I took from spotify, I just changed the background colour to fit. underneath the people performance gif is an excerpt of yoongi's billboard interview from july 2023. the rest are screenshots directly from doolset, gifs from yoongi's iu's palette interview and selfmade visualisations of lyrics, etc. I decided against listing all the content elements in the caption - as usually done for an actual web weave - because some media was used multiple times and it would've felt weird to repeat it in the listing.

regarding more stylistic choices, I decided on a blue and warm yellow-orangy colour scheme, both because kari's current blog layout is this beautiful blue, but also because I associate blue with both namjoon (especially after indigo, obvs) and yoongi (his painting from 2020 instantly comes to mind). since 'love' on the other side is often portrayed as something warm and cosy, red/orange/yellow became the contrasting colours. I tried very hard to make all the colours look as consistent as possible and to match the shades of blues to kari's blog colours. funnily enough, there always seemed to be either something blue or warm-toned in the actual content, which was pretty convenient. besides the pseudo-screenshots for some of the lyrics (typed out in fonts that are typically used in books), I created three graphic elements as well, simply because I know sweet kari appreciates them and I wanted to have a personal kimtaegi touch in it. the first one is a visual representation of people pt. 2's lyrics. I always thought of faceless silhouettes when thinking of people, and combined that with yoongi's painting style (you see that painting means a whole lot to me lmao). since I can't really draw, I used paintings I found on pinterest (you can find the whole board in the source of the og post), masked the person and the heart out and changed their colour (which is not as easy as it sounds!). the fading effect was achieved by carefully going over both until I liked how it looked (which again, took embarrassingly long). the second graphic element is again a direct visualisation of the lyrics used in the panel: I digitally cut up a picture of namgi, in multiple rectangles that are supposed to represent the letter ㅁin saram. I actually printed the picture out first and cut it up with scissors, but I couldn't find a good way to scan it back in :( so digital cutting it was; please note that the edges of every snippet are rough, I always try my best to make it look as realistic and tangible as possible which is time-consuming but adds a nice touch in my opinion.

the collage effect of this graphic is inspired by works of anthony garace. his artworks are stunning, and I do love a good mixed media effect! also it just fits perfectly with the lyrics... among all these straight lines (-> the rectangles), [I find/ is] my love, my love, my love (-> little snippets of a picture of the two). the flowers in the last graphic both represent yoongi (the lotus flower cutout, referencing his amygdala lyrics about blooming like a lotus flower, which is also achieved by love, y'know :( ) and namjoon (the wildflower; yes it's an actual blue wildflower, I researched! it's a wild blue flax; referencing his same-named song). I used an actual photograph of it and made it look like a painting with photoshop magic. it also was supposed to look just a litte like a cynotype as used in his album design.

again, look at all those nice rough edges in that panel, this is all added intentionally. I hope everyone who saw the post also caught the teeny tiny animation of the hangul letter ㅁ to ㅇin the text on the left side; quite literally eroding edges <3

the last gif of ot7 was perfect to round it all up, referencing the lyrics above quite emotionally, starting off with the two of them, then them being joined by the rest....sigh. I will be honest, there have been a few tears falling onto the keyboard. I hope this set can convey namgi's beautiful lyricism in an interesting, artistic way. it's easy to get inspired by their art, it definitely makes you appreciate everything they do even more.

[i-am-still-bb]

No. 20

“People don’t change people, time does.” | Blanket | Found Family | “You will regret touching them.”

Pairing: Fili/Kili Rating: T Universe: Fast Car (formerly Dead Batteries) Words: 2030

--

A/N: This followed the original work (Dead Batteries)

--

Fili drove straight back to the clubhouse after he left Kili on the side of the highway waiting for a tow truck. A tow truck that would take Kili to his parent’s house. He stopped himself. It was Kili’s house. 

Kili’s house. 

He could not just go home after learning that information. If he went home he might download social media apps and search for Kili to see what he had been up to all these years. Something that Fili had consciously stopped himself several times over the years. It had been harder when he was younger and social media was new and everyone was on there posting photos of their shoes, their car, their lunch, their snack, their pet, any unhinged thing that occurred to them. And they attached actual thoughts or stories to those pictures, not just inspiration quotes that were taken straight from Pinterest or copied from a listicle. Things became less personal, and it was less enjoyable and informative and satisfying to stalk people online because there was content, but it told you less than nothing about the person in most cases. 

He thought about seeing who was on the after hours tow truck rotation. What he would do with that information he did not know. Take their place? Grill them for information? 

“Fili!” Nori called out when Fili walked into the great room of the club house. It was Friday so the room was decently full with members and their significant others. The room was different than it had been when Fili and Kili had been teenagers. There was no more cigarette smoke, the music was less loud, and it had been redecorated with Dis’ assistance fairly recently meaning that not everything was black leather, glass, and chrome. 

Fili grabbed a beer from the fridge and made his way over to join the cluster around Nori who was regaling his audience with a story about his previous weekend which seemed to have involved a lot of alcohol, a not insignificant amount of weed, and had ended with Nori passed out in his back lawn without any pants or underwear. Fili listened, but his thoughts kept wandering back to Kili. 

“So…?”

“What?” Fili asked, snapping back to the moment to find most of the little circle looking at him.

“I heard the call out come in.”

Fili raised his eyebrows, playing ignorant, “What call?”

“Kili.”

“Oh?” Fili raised the beer to his lips.

“You’re not cute,” Nori replied.

“Debatable,” Fili grinned.

“I know you know what I’m talking about.”

“Hmm?”

“He said you already diagnosed his car’s problem.”

“Mhm.”

“And?”

“It’s the alternator.”

Nori gave Fili a pointed look. 

Fili took that as his indication to leave. “I should get home, busy day tomorrow.”

Nori snorted. “Yeah, getting under the hood of a certain brunette.”

“It’s been over a decade,” Fili replied hotly. “We’ve both moved on. His car needs fixed. I’m on the schedule for tomorrow morning. You can go look for yourself. You can even come supervise me if you think I can’t be professional.”

Nori snorted. “That’s not something I need to see.”

“Fuck you.” Fili turned on his heel and left before anything else that he might come to regret came out of his mouth. Maybe home would have been a better choice.

He crammed his helmet on and then sat in the parking lot astride his big black bike connecting his phone to the bluetooth function in his helmet and then scrolling through music trying to find the right mood. He listened to a song for a few seconds and then skipped it. He sat there, focusing on that, calming down and not thinking about Kili,  until a text came in. 

Isa: Are you busy?

Fili: Maybe. Why?

Isa: The plans I had fell through.

Fili: Tinder boy a no show?

Isa: More like Tinder boy was a walking red flag. Isa: Literally

Fili: What were you thinking?

Isa: Drinks at the Green Dragon?

Fili: You buying?

Isa: Uh. What happened?

Fili: You’re not the only one who had something unexpected happen.

Isa: Color me interested.

Fili: Easier in person

Isa: I’m going to change and then I’ll be on my way.

Fili: Already on my bike

The Green Dragon was Bilbo’s pet project. Thorin had bought it for him as a birthday gift a few years ago. They still teased Bilbo that Thorin had given him a job to get him out of the house more often. But many of the club’s members frequented the pub. It filled a gap that many towns had. Bilbo called it “a third space” during the morning and afternoons people would meet there for book clubs, knitting groups, or just to grab a cup of coffee and people watch. Coffee, tea, pastries, some basic sandwiches, and salads were the main fare until after 5pm, when it turned more into a traditional bar space with a short and sweet entree menu, a rotating beer menu all from local breweries, and a daily desert. There was a small room, that used to be a coat closet, that Bilbo had turned into a Little Free Library / used book store.

The parking lot was already decently full when Fili pulled up.

Half of the space had been cleared of tables to create a make-shift dance floor (standard for Friday and Saturday nights) and there was something upbeat about rather being famous than dead pounding over the speakers. Bilbo had invested in a digital jukebox to help boost business post-COVID. Fili did not always love the music that the younger patrons picked, but if he really needed something a little more late-2000s, more punk, less pop, he could pay an extra fee and have his song bumped to the front of the list. 

Fili claimed a corner booth and ordered whatever was dark on tap for himself and an IPA for Isa. 

He drank is beer, ordered another along with some waters, and wait for Isa to arrive. He knew from experience that it could be a while. She said she was going to change and it really depended on how long it took her to pick a new outfit. 

Fili: I got a table. Corner near the door.

The college kid checked to see if Fili needed anything else and Fili waved him off saying that he was waiting for a friend. 

“I always forget how busy this palace gets on Fridays,” Isa said, sliding into the booth opposite Fili. “Don’t get me wrong. It’s a good thing, but… I’m just always surprised.”

Fili shrugged. “Makes it easy to talk without getting overheard.”

“That’s right,” she leaned closer, her bobbed dark curls falling forward, “You said something happened.”

Fili nodded and took a long drink, steeling himself to talk about this. He had learned to tease out the things that caused him any sort of distress rather than pretending that they did not exist and hoping that they would go away with time. 

“He’s back.”

“Who?” Isa asked, licking a bit of foam from her upper lip.

“Kili.”

Her dark brown eyes went wide enough that white surrounded her irises. “What?!”

“That was pretty much my reaction.” Fili drained the rest of his second beer. “On the inside.”

“I bet. Did he say why he’s back?”

“His dad died a few months back. He says he’s here to sort through his things.”

“And you don’t believe him?” 

“He hasn’t been back in over a decade, Isa.”

“Yeah. I see your point.”

“Plus he’s not just here for a long weekend or a week or two. He’s taken a job at the hospital.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“So he’s probably sticking around for a while?”

Fili ordered another beer when the waiter came around again. “That’s what I figured.”

Isa pulled a face. “How do you know he’s back?”

Fili snorted. “He ended up stranded on the side of the highway heading in to town. I stopped to help before I realized it was him.”

“Would that have stopped you?”

“No. Probably not,” Fili sighed. “It’s just,” he exhaled heavily through his nose. “It’s been a decade, you know? I figured that I’d done pretty much all I needed to do, everything I could do, to move on. And then there he was, standing in front of me, and I got those butterflies all over again like we were sixteen again for God’s sake.”

Isa reached out to rest her hand on his. “I’m sorry that this has upset you. Is there anything I can do to help? Other than listen, of course.”

Fili rolled his eyes, “I can hear the therapist talking.”

“Sorry,” Isa forced a scowl. “You should show him that you’re over him by…” she stopped and looked around the Green Dragon for the most attractive person, “taking that girl home,” she pointed.

“That’s Rosie Cotton,” Fili said with an amused smile. “She’s seventeen.”

“Maybe not her then,” Isa casts around for another candidate. 

“I see what you’re doing,” Fili said. “And, no, I’m going to do the well-adjusted healthy thing and go home by myself.”

“Good.”

“Besides, if you’re trying to pick the hottest person here, then you’d have to suggest yourself.”

“Flirt.”

Fili grinned.

“That’s good that you’re not even tempted.”

“I didn’t say that. I said I was going to be a grown up and not do the unhealthy thing. I make no promises about whether or not I look at porn when I get home.”

“Okay!” Isa exclaimed. “Too much information!”

“We’ve traded website recommendations.”

“I like to forget about that,” Isa sniffed.

“Yours were good. I still use them,” Fili teased.

“Moving on…” Isa nudged him. “So are you going to do anything about him being back?”

Fili pulled a face. “I don’t know. His car got towed to the shop and I’m working tomorrow morning, so I’ll probably see him when he picks it up, but he doesn’t have a way to get there so I might end up dropping it off at his place. Or… I don’t know, Isa.”

“I hear you.”

“Things ended so badly. We were both stupid. We both said things that probably hurt each other. I don’t remember things I said, but I remember things that he said. And I’m sure he remembers that last phone call. And everything that came before that.”

Isa frowned in confusion.

“I… I was not kind. And I hung up on him,” Fili stared down into the beer that had newly been refilled. “That was the night I got the DUI.”

“Speaking of that,” Isa said, “Just so this doesn’t have to come up later. Are you having another after that one? If so, I’m going to need your keys.”

Fili shook his head. “No. I shouldn’t even have this one, but I figured we’d be here for a while. I still have to hear about the Tinder boy.”

“In a bit,” Isa waved her hand.

“Like… how do we move forward from that? Do I apologize? Do I wait for him to apologize? Do we just pretend that none of it happened?”

“I think that depends on what you think your relationship with him will be moving forward.”

“Did I mention the butterflies?”

“I wouldn’t act like none of that happened then.”

“You’re right,” Fili sighed. He was silent for a minute. “So an apology. Then what?”

“I’d say just see where it goes. Time is what changes people. You’re not the same kid I met in State. I’m not the same girl. And I’m sure Kili isn’t the same either.”

“That could be a bad thing.”

“Or it could be a good thing. You said you got butterflies. Maybe he did too. Or maybe you can both be friends, neighbors, members of the same community without awkwardness.”

Fili snorted. “I doubt that last one.”

“You never know.”

“So tell me about Tinder Boy.”

“To start with the least problematic thing… he has / had a girlfriend …”

Fili drank his third beer a lot slower while he listened to the disaster that Isa’s date with Samuel the CPA had turned out to be. And it had only lasted fifteen minutes.

--

Taglist

Everything: @silvermoon-scrolls @metztlilua @i-am-pinkie

Fili/Kili: @dubhlachen

[bloodiedrogue]

Ok so I was looking at quotes on Pinterest, and I found one that said “I’d bleed for anything if it held me the right way.” I just can’t stop thinking of how well it fits Astarion! Or even a Tav who is with ascended!Astarion!

okay but i have that same quote somewhere my zaystarion discord server for inspiration because it’s so beautifully tragic. 🥲 definitely see it relating to both of those relationships, for sure!!

[flanneryculp]

oh also one more thing from pinterest anon (sorry if i’m annoying you with these 😭)— i have an atwq board too if you’d like to check it out <3 (with some shameless moxie/kellar shipping bc it’s my personal hc that they got together after witndfon) https://pin.it/1qplbEf :)

clickable link

HEY, WOAH, THAT'S SO GOOD. PINTEREST ANON BEING A GENIUS ONCE AGAIN. lets go through all of them!

lemony snicket

so glad we agree with lemony having darkish brown eyes. i don't know how you chose it but all these images just convey loneliness in the best way possible. secrecy, too... big fan of the way you mixed in funny quotes and heartwrenching ones, too.

moxie mallahan

THE MOTHER QUOTE, OH MY GOD? </3 looove the letters and the lighthouse and the stairs a whole lot, too.

ellington feint

my favorite girl! <3 i agree with completely all of this and it is gorgeous. loove the record player one and her outfits!

armstrong feint

ohh all those suits and "i am the beast i worship"... perfect

dashiell qwerty

all v v accurate

pip and squeak

that left photo with the two of them is SO accurate. i didn't really have a clear mental picture of them before but it is definitely that now.

jake hix

just looking at this board makes me hungry. loving the warm tones in this <3

kellar haines

the sweaters look so soft and cozy. to be honest i never found kellar very interesting but i love your interpretation of him--it's making me change my mind :)

cleo knight

so pretty!! i love all these outfits, too.

funnies

THE "ELLINGTON DEFENDERS VS LEMONY DEFENDERS" IS SO ACCURATE. I'M BOTH. especially love the one where lemony doxes stew. he so would. oh, to be on atwq twitter with the aoa...

text

these are so accurate (as are all of them!) love the themes of change, a damaged childhood...

association of associates

ohhh my god they're friends. </3 that dead bird one is so sad. i love how many pictures are happy and sad and a little bit of both, but they all go together so well.

lemony and ellington

these hugs are breaking my heart. :') this is one of my favorite dynamics in the book and it's portrayed so well here. i really like how sad their relationship is and with the quotes it's just perfecttt

lemony and moxie

THEYRE BEST FRIENDS!! <3 <3 <3 <3 </3 </3 </3 </3 </3

armstrong and lemony

such a fascinating dynamic that isn't talked about nearly enough imo. i think i'll be thinking about that mirror imagery forever.

armstrong and ellington

i knew this one was going to wreck me before i even opened it and i was right. the text about the pigeon.........

moxie and kellar

so cute. so soft. exactly what they deserve.

cleo and jake

the pajama one is SOOOO accurate!!!! i have been thinking about it for the past ten minutes

lemony and kellar

love the eyes

moxie and ellington

the WINDOWS!!!! the distance, being so close yet so far, more similar than either of them will ever know. the curse of being narrative foils

---

thank you so much for sending this, it's so well put-together and i had a lot of fun looking through it! you really have a talent for this kind of thing. :)

[dreamoonverse]

Unbreakable Vows 💚🐍✨🪄

Chapter 4: Confessions

Just imagine you weren’t supposed to fall for him…it was forbidden, after what the dark lord has did to your family…but yet someone seems to change that. Bucky is full of secrets but this one secret he can’t keep hidden forever and you will both pay a price to hide it.

Death eater bucky x Witch! Reader

NFSW series 18+ no minors!

Mentions: Angst, brief mention of alcohol, injury, blood, slight fluff, bit of smut (wet dreams),

Series masterlist

(Hey everyone! Been a hot minute since I posted another chapter I’m so sorry have a lot going on but good news this one is a bit longer sorry for the cliff hanger haha! Just me there is more to come and it’s going to get real intense just wait😅 hope you like it 😘)

“You are constantly making it hard for me to behave when I’m with you,” - (freaky humor 69 Pinterest quote)

You hadn't seen or spoken to Bucky as another week close to two passes by. Draco and them would now be in school. Only George and them to keep you occupied you talked to George more vented a lot. Today you were with narcassia as she drank tea silently by the window you knew she was in pain. She was alone when you think about it, her son in school only owls for now would suffice. Lucius still locked away as far as you know…but there was a plan forming to get him out that would be something to see. All the death eaters just told to lay low until the dedicated times arose for recruiting. Those few handful times you visited Arthur and Molly he would talk about that night at the banquet you had to do everything not to indulge in the conversation. Had you not been wearing the mask he would’ve found out. He just was glad the key remain tightly locked away in his attic. Oh you were gonna have that key soon you needed to still do everything to make you trustworthy. It was becoming more difficult each passing day though…whose side were you really on.

“How about some music?” You suggested to her playing a record on the turntable help her mind at ease. “Ugh how quaint,” Bellatrix twirled a curl sitting on the couch legs on the table laying back not a care in the world. “Don’t worry sissy they will be back with him in no time…i should’ve gone but too boring,” she sighs out.

“What are you referring to…” you turn to her quite puzzled. “Lucius of course…didn’t Barnes tell you…” she rolls her eyes as if it was an inconvenience to tell her.

“No I haven’t spoken to him…” you shrug. “Lovebirds having trouble in paradise…” she pouts which sends a middle finger in her face. “As fucking if…”

*chime breaking* you jump at the sound before seeing three men Lucius on one looking drain barely alive. Ferdink blood residue on his mouth and in the middle barely concuious Bucky. “He needs medical…” Lucius sounds out of breath

You responded quickly “get him to the bedroom I got it.” You grab a first aid heading to nearest room where they laid him down, you never worked so fast everyone just watched. You could hear Bucky’s groans him hissing or wincing why did it bother you like you didn’t want him to feel pain he was so fragile to touch you felt you tended accordingly on him. He had a cut on his side it was deep but fortunately it would just need stitching and wrapped, whoever he went to toe to toe with it was a lot for him to come out with more than a bruise or scratch. “That should do it,” you say hands covered in blood quickly going to wash. “Everyone out…” you ordered they didn’t seem to question. You felt he needed to space. You take slow strides to the side of the bed watching how his bare chest rises and falls breathing heavy asleep.

The sight makes you flustered part of that wet dream you had that night of him looking at him now. You feel your head some shaking the thought away wrong time to be thinking like that. Then you feel guilty, you should’ve been there. You could’ve stopped this, protected him. Though you both can’t seem to be in the same room with arguing. Course he made your teeth grin and irritated the hell out of you. It’s just…something about him there is someone deep down who wants to be let out. You shake your head again noticing a strand of that brunette hair sticking out tucking it behind his ear you lingered there probably more than you should before leaving out the room.

———

“B-Bucky…please,” you stuttered breathing hard hovering over him riding him. “Fuck babydoll don’t stop…so good,” Bucky grips your hips tight holding you steady. “God I wanna cum baby I don’t know if I can last this time…” you whine. “A few more baby let me fill you up be a good girl hang on…” he groans in your ear biting on your neck. “I…Bucky I’m cumming!!” You cry out.

“Mmmm,” Bucky feels himself jolt up instinctively grabbing his side a sharp pain rippling through his body. “Fuck what-“ he looks down seeing feeling cloth on his skin. His side is wrapped. He looks around the room some light coming through the dark forest green curtains. He breathes hard struggling but manages to sit up his mouth dry…really dry head pounding. Everything of before starts to come back the prison breakout, guards in every direction. His tactics were off…he was sloppy, not focused. That is what got him all fucked up now. Too busy remembering the fight between you two…the dreams like this one now…fuck why was he dreaming you this way. The way you could unfold for him…he closes his eyes pushing the thought away before jumping again at the sound of the door turning grabbing his wand next to him pointing it at the potential target.

“Oh shoot ya not gonna put me out my misery…” you come in a glass of water in your hands closing the door behind you. He breathes out relieved it was you but then a little rage pent up in him. “You need to learn to fucking knock…I could’ve hurt you…” he warns setting down his wand. “Too bad,” you tease before he turns to you like he isn’t in a joking mood. You hand him the water. “You guys managed to make it on every wanted poster there throughout the town…” you sit down at a distance on the edge of the bed. “What else is new?” He shrugs.

“You need to be careful you know how these times are, the ministry and the order work fast and silent. They will come after you buck…” you inform your tone seems desperate and concerned. “After you tell them right? Why don’t you just say where we are, your great at that,” he scoffs drinking the rest of the water.

“That’s a low blow, everything I do is to-“ he cuts you off throwing the glass at the wall making you jump.“To what?! You think I give a shit, your on their side…you pretend like you have everything under control but you don’t, you think your so fucking innocent and that you can play double agent forever doll…you will get your way,” something about his words is a low blow.

“No I don’t have this under control…I never did. I just want people safe, I want this damn war to be over…I’m well aware no one cares if I live or die,” your voice rises a bit of a crack in your voice. “No i never said I didn’t-“ he tries to interject but your words overpower him. “No you want revenge and I’m sorry that you lost…but I fucking did too…you have any idea what my life has been like James! I have to please everyone and be perfect or everyone dies and I don’t know what to do…” you say tears start falling. “Y/N please let me-“ you still cut him off. “No! You don’t get it cause if I fail it’s over…if I mess up I don’t get no redos…I would do everything to protect everyone and anything…including you!” You shout. Bucky’s eyes widened some “why me…” he stood up holding his side. “I…just forget it…” you turn to the door, turning the knob before a hand pushes it shut. “Turn around..” his deep voice makes you shiver and you do so facing me with no choice but your eyes red and puffy.

“I asked you a question…why me?” He places his hands on both sides cornering you. Course you could escape easily but yet here you were vulnerable to the scent of fresh balsam filling your nose. “I…James please leave me alone-“ you instinctively try to push on his chest but he grabs your wrist pinning it to the wall something intense forms in his eyes possible anger…confusion. You breathe hard his chest against yours looking at him and his lips. Fuck…you crash your lips into his. “Mm,” he groans, caught off guard at first but gives in, kissing you back. There is an intensity of fire building up between you two. You don’t stop him nor the other way around. It’s sloppy and needy the way his tongue entangled in yours. You pull back for a moment looking into those ice blue eyes. “James…” you say out of breath and he takes a moment too. “That’s one way to shut that mouth…” he jokes you can’t help but laugh a little “fuck off…” you groan, leaning your head back. “Or we could just fuck…” a devious smirk forms. “Buck…let’s just take a minute here…” you say, still tryna process what happened.

———

A couple weeks pass by every meeting that goes on or gathering is followed by a hot make out session in a corner or room where you can’t seem to stay away and he can’t keep his hands off you. Those wet dreams seem to make it’s way to a reality and the thought of letting him fuck your senseless was exhilarating. Though you didn’t let it happen yet.

Today you were in the shop working on some brews and some more medicine. You left your window open when your barred Owl made her way in dropping a letter on your table. “Hey moony…” you smile, taking the letter from Padfoot. Harry. You made sure he could contact you when he needed to. He ended up using sirus’s cover name as his own. It was too dangerous for anyone to use their actual names to send letters these days. You open it up reading it. He talked about the incident he had with Draco on the train, what Dumbledore had him doing with slughorn. You breathed out heavily rubbing your head. This wasn’t good. A possible horox at play. You continue to read on before the door opens and you slip the letter away. “Hello how can I- oh George hey,” you half smile. He looks down and then at you not in his usual mood where he whistles or tells a joke. “George, what's wrong?” You walk over to him concerned, placing a hand on his shoulder he pulls it off quickly. “Woah George…what’s wrong…” you say feeling a wave of guilt roll through you.

“How could you y/n….” He looks at you with a pain in his eyes. “What are you talking about…” you ask. “You know exactly what the bloody hell I’m talking about don’t act innocent!” He snaps. You breathe out “No I don’t…” you say. “Oh so you deny it…that you are one of them…” he clenches his fist. “No I'm not,” you can tell where this is going. “George you already know what i'm doing that isn’t no secret,” you step closer but he steps back. “No don’t even, you even are fucking one of them! I knew Barnes was brainwashing you,” his yell ripples through the air you suck in a breath. “What I’m not…what are you playing at here…” you get defensive. “I saw you two…the other night…i thought you cared about us y/n! About me!” His voice cracks you didn’t realize that you affected him this way. “George I do care, you're my bestfriend why wouldn’t I? I'm trying to keep everyone safe. I would do anything-“ he stops you. “I don’t wanna hear it, I’m even shocked my mother and father still have faith in you…time for you to decide what side you are princess…” His words hit you hard. You never saw George this way and he leaves. You can’t help but let tears fall, folding your arms like you're cradling yourself or shielding your body from any more pain.

You would have to make a choice. But not tonight…instead you would do something else. To take away the pain.

——

Bucky was reading in one of the guest rooms at the manor glad to have a night of not being the one to deal with all this mess. Lucius was too busy downstairs drinking that man has probably gone through the liquor cabinet as long as he didn’t touch bourbon Bucky could care less. Bellatrix and Nacrassia were out doing who knows what. Fine with him, all he could think about was you. Your lips…how you grinded on his lap, your hands tugging and pulling on his hair. Your scent was overwhelming and intoxicating. He wanted to unravel you. Let the whole fucking manor hear how you scream his name he needed you. He would wait till you wanted, no begged he would be ready. Just little did he know that would be sooner that he thought.

*knocking*

He still read while the door unlocked and open on its own. “I wondered when you would come back…” he says, closing the book sitting up, seeing you a complete wreck. “Doll what’s the puffy eyes for?” He pouted he hated when you cried. You closed the door behind you leaning against it. You moved your hands to your top starting to unbutton it. He gets up grabbing your hands but tenderly leaning his head against yours “What are you doing…” he asks. “I need you…all of you…” you breathe out. He looks at you then down at your shirt pulling the last few buttons down. “Then have me…”

To be continued hehe…

[aliminalspaceasmr]

We get to ask questions? Cool! I love asking questions!

1) Do you have any songs that remind you specifically of a character? If so, what are they?

2) Are Serena and the Revenant one of those slow sloooowww burns or like.. an average slow burn?

3) If someone hasn’t resurrected for the first time and is still considered mortal, can a Revenant still sense if that person is immortal or is it only after they resurrect the first time?

4) Are there any more traits that Revenants have other than immortality?

5) How did Verena and Odette even stumble upon the thoughts of Revenants? That just doesn’t come out of the blue..

6) Are pets allowed in the Tower? I’ve got a funny thought in my head of a dog just running recklessly around the place 😭

7) Where did you get inspiration for Resurrection?

I’ll return the next time I have urgent asks, thank you for your time and for all the effort you put into your work!

Oh, of course! This is genuinely making my day that y'all are interested!

Yes! I've got a whole playlist on Spotify (I believe it's linked on the YouTube channel), but I can name a few specific ones from it! I Found - Amber Run (for Serena) tired of me - Karina Grace (for Kaylee) There's also some on there for characters that have yet to be introduced in the story.

Well, they had their first kiss in the finale, and they will definitely develop their relationship over the course of Season Two. We delve into some of Serena's backstory, and within that it will deepen their relationship. So, it might be a liiiittle bit of a slower burn, but for the sake of creating a deep amount of trust between the characters.

So this is actually a plot point! They can't sense that the mortal person is actually a Revenant until after the first resurrection, as a lot changes about your body (and genetics) when the first resurrection is triggered. I suppose it's a tiny spoiler, but also established, that that's one of the things Helena is trying to figure out at Aeterna- how to tell someone is a Revenant before they've died the first time.

I'm going to delve a lot deeper into that especially during Series Two (which, if I stick with the current plan, will be Seasons Five-Eight), but I can go ahead and talk about it some here. The Revenants ability to resurrect, and subsequently live forever, is based on a "healing immortality." So, I tried to imagine what that would look like over time, as the body continues to heal and improve itself. I imagine eventually, a Revenant wouldn't need to sleep, eat, etc. and would have improved memory, cognitive function, etc. as their body has worked to heal and improve itself.

Verena and Odette definitely didn't stumble upon Revenants, but for now, I'm going to have to keep the how a secret. It's going to come up in the series! (Either in the later part of Season Two or in Season Three, depending on how the episodes work.)

Oh, my God, I love that so much! I've not thought about pets before, but honestly, I'm very into that idea, that's so cute!

Well, I actually wrote Resurrection as a TV pilot like four or five years ago! That version was quite different than what we see now, but I still have the script. I live in NYC, and I wanted to set something in the city, and write a genre I haven't written before (sci-fi). I don't remember how the specific idea of the characters being able to resurrect came to me, but if I'm honest, I think I might've seen a quote on Pinterest that inspired it (I have Pinterest boards for every project I write, as well as one for writing inspiration for later). Thank you so much for the questions!!! I appreciate you taking the time, both to listen to the series and to write me, so much!

[martsonmars]

How I found Carry On and its fandom – long answer because I love talking about myself.

I used to see Fangirl in bookshops all the time, when I was 14 or so, and I wanted to buy it every time, because a book about fanfiction? Sounded like my shit, but I never got to buying it for some reason.

While one of my best friends read and loved it, and when Carry On was published in Italy she read and loved it too, and probably told me “you should read it”. So it made my way into my TBR list, but I think I didn't really know what it was about, because when I grew older and deleted from my list all those books that I thought I wasn't interested in anymore (mainly books – at least the ones I hadn't read yet lol – that were super famous in the early to mid 2010s and all people in multifandom spaces seemed to have read but that felt stupid and boring to a 16yo me who was starting to read only Dostoyevsky), I deleted Fangirl and Carry On too.

I kept hearing about them from this friend (I didn't remember about it, but after reading WS I found out she has a rant about it on her Instagram page lmao) and on Instagram, but it never crossed my path intensely enough to convince me to buy it.

Then last year, around November or December, for a reason I don't remember Carry On was back on my TBR list – and it was on top of it! To the point that instead of remaining a book in a list, I even had it in my cart on some bookshop website. Maybe I had finally found out what it was about? Who knows. Anyway, I finally wanted to really buy it, but something kept stopping me.

Then last December this famous friend and I organised a “bookstagram” Advent Calendar – each day had a prompt and people posted a photo of a book that filled the prompt.

One day, someone posted a scene of RWRB. Now, RWRB had made its way to my list in the previous months, and that scene made me think “I definitely need to read it”. Put into cart, still didn't buy it.

Now we enter illegal book acquisition so yeah I hope David doesn't mind piracy hahaha. If he does mind I don't want to know

So, while RWRB and CO were in my cart waiting to be bought, I stumbled over a pdf copy of both of them. And one night at the end of January I started RWRB. It was the first, and up to now only, time I stayed up all night (like, not even going to sleep at 7am like I did the two times I was at a party/sleepover), and to finish a book.

I spend the following day, all day, explaining the plot to my best friend (not the CO one) because I needed to let it out and looking for fanart and incorrect quotes on Pinterest. And damn, I kept being bothered by stuff about Simon and Baz who are they can they kindly fuck off I'm here for Alex and Henry only. But from what Pinterest was showing me, they seemed interesting. So I googled and wow! They were the main characters of Carry On! And I had a pdf copy of it

Hence another night of intense reading (this time I didn't stay up all night – just up to chapter 61), followed by a day I spent finishing CO and reading WS.

And that's the story. But I'm not going to shut up.

Then I spent more time on Pinterest. And this time I kept being annoyed by a caption that read “you need to read rebel, rebel, it's the perfect fic”. I – as I've said many times – had never been a fanfiction reader, I could count the random stuff (that I read because I found it linked on Instagram or something like that) I've read before 2021 on my fingers. But I was curious, and needed to get my head off WS, so I tried it. And then I couldn't let go, I clicked on the Snowbaz tag and started reading most of the fic from the last published and backwards.

And I read, I read, I read, and I felt that I wanted to write fics again. (I had stopped writing fics intensely in 2016/2017, and the last last I'd written had been in 2018.) But I was in a phase where I thought “my writer block that started in 2018 doesn't even let write my original stuff, why should I waste time on other people's characters?”, so I resisted the urge to write fics. Until I read Every Line Lost by NineMagicks and I couldn't take it anymore.

I opened a doc and I started writing – in English, for the first time – a fanfiction masked by different names and some original details. (Like, I refused to write fics so I gave the characters new names but they were still Baz and Penny, and then I would've introduced Simon.)

And I kept reading fics until I finally gave in and started plotting a proper Snowbaz fic. Which brought me to Tumblr to look for beta readers.

And then I made a mutual, and we became instantly friends, and she offered to beta and then forced me to start reblogging and posting on Tumblr instead of lurking. And I did, and then I found one of aralias's invites to the Discord server. And I probably wouldn't have joined if the week before I hadn't played D&D with my best friend's friends, and they'd told me “since you don't live here we can continue the session on Discord when you're back home”, so I had downloaded it. So when I saw aralias's invite I was like, fuck it.

The rest is history.

Fellow snowbazzians, rb this and tell me how you came across the series. Mine was a stranger recommending it to me in a bookstore. Thank you stranger!!! (If one of y'all told a rando at Powells in Portland the summer of 2017* to read Carry On, thank you, you don't know what this means to me, or maybe you do ❤)

[helldustedstories]

@hlylight asked: “ I am not merciful, and I am not kind, and l am not afraid to make you wish that I was. ” Angel @ Husk

quotes found on pinterest // accepting

Husk had kept the bar open longer than usual tonight, waiting for Angel to get back from work. He was normally back by now, which meant he'd probably had a particularly bad day. Since he didn't sleep much anyway, Husk stayed at the bar, nursing his drink as he reorganized the booze and cleaned the bar for the….he's actually not sure of the number of times he'd done this tonight, actually. But it gave him something to do that he didn't have to think about.

But when Angel comes through the doors looking practically dead on his feet, Husk can't help but frown a little even as he pushes the drink he'd already prepared across the bar.

Before he can say anything, Angel speaks, and Husk raises an eyebrow at his words, leaning back against the bar as he crosses his arms over his chest. There was a lot more to Angel than Husk had initially given him credit for, and he understood him a lot more than he had when they'd both first started at the hotel. A lot of the persona Angel presented was a mask, a defense mechanism, something that Husk could understand. So to hear him talk like that about himself, especially when he'd been doing okay recently, makes Husk's fur stand on end.

"Did somethin' happen that you don't wanna talk about?" he asks, trying to force himself to relax. If Angel didn't want to tell him, shouldn't that be his business? Angel was entitled to keep things to himself. Husk was still trying to find that balance between pushing just a little for some sort of answers and respecting the warning signs that Angel was displaying.

Because sometimes, those signs could present one thing on the surface while the real meaning was beneath it. Husk was usually pretty good about telling the difference, but he didn't want to push too much with Angel; he already had enough people that ignored his boundaries, and Husk wasn't about to add to that list.

[adversitybloomed]

🌸  ┊ letter received from  @orangeshinigami      Kurosaki Ichigo  :  “   I've lived too long with pain. I won't know who I am without it.   ” / QUOTES FOUND ON PINTEREST.

        ❝  you are Kurosaki Ichigo. with our without the pain, you are who you have always been. you are a kindhearted and brave soul, who does so much for others with little regards to yourself. you are loyal to those you care for, and you show a rare kindness towards your enemies until given no other choice. you are so much more then your pain, but i understand it is not easy to see when heaviness ways down your heart.  ❞    her hand went to his own as she gave him a gentle squeeze.

          after a moment of silence, she lifted his hand from where it rested and took it in both of her own to bring it closer to her heart.       ❝  you are so strong, not just physically but mentally and spiritually as well. you are loyal, brave and true. you have a witty sense of humor, but you are humble enough to take note of others that are around you. you are a hero to so many, but also the bane to those who dare to cross your path as your enemy.  ❞    she gave him a small smile,       ❝  so many of your friends... so many of your family are ready to fight for you and to fight by your side. not because it is their duty, but because they love and cherish you as you are and believe in you.  ❞

          mulan paused for a moments breath, her eyes filled with warmth and care.       ❝  it helps too, if you just looked in the mirror as well, for not only are you so beautiful from the inside, but also from the outside as well. you are very handsome as well, with the most beautiful hair i have ever seen and your eyes... they remind me of warm caramel, so sweet and inviting  ━━ yet so powerful and fierce. your height is a great advantage as well, for though you are tall in stature, you are lean with muscles even when you try to slouch due to one of your moods.  ❞   

          she continued to hold her hand in his own, though she removed one of them in favor of reaching up to cup his cheek with a tender touch,        ❝  sadness and pain are inevitable in a lifetime. sometimes... suffering is just suffering... it does not make you stronger... it does not build character, it only just hurts. do not feel as if it is not okay to feel, because it is. it is okay to feel lost and unsure of yourself.  ❞    her thumb traced his cheek.

        ❝  it is okay to not know who you are. because in the end, you must discover the beauty in yourself. it is part of the journey... and Ichigo, though it might seem like it you are not alone.  ❞    she paused once more, this time rising to her feet as she closed the difference between them both. bending slightly, she placed a tender kiss to his forehead before whispering,       ❝  the choice you make may be up to you... but know that whatever path you choose, it will not change the way i feel towards you. regardless of who you become, i will support and cherish you for who you are.  ❞

[purplebass]

Hi there! I LOVE your edits, they’re so pretty 💕

Can you please tell me how you make them (what apps or resources you use)? I want to make some edits of my own but I’m not sure how.

Hi anon! 💙

I only use Photoshop CC to edit my pictures and make my gifs. I look for royalty free stock photos to edit. My favorite sites are Pexels, Pixabay, Unsplash, Canva. They offer free stock photos you can edit (you need to create an account to download, but then you're good!). I never use Google or Pinterest to look for pics because those sites contain copyrighted material. If I want to make a gif, I go on Youtube to download scene packs of the thing I want to gif (you have to search for "name of the show/movie/character/ship scene pack" on YT and use a free program called ClipGrab to download the video).

I'll try to explain as quick and simple as possible, and I hope it's clear. I may make a tutorial because the process of making edits sometimes depends on how complex you want your edit to be. The first thing I do is think about the theme of the picspam. When I want to create a picspam about a character, I usually search for images that remind me of them. For eg. if I want to make a picspam about a bookish character, I find stock images of books, or a person reading, etc. After I found some pictures that satisfy me and decide how many panels I want my edit to be (since I need at least a pic for panel if I want to make the simplest edit), I can start my work on Photoshop or on any other editing program. Canva is a good alternative too.

The first thing I do on Photoshop is create a new document with a transparent background. For an edit like this one, I usually create a 400x600 pixel document because it's easier to manage and it's good quality. If I want to make a rectangular edit where the base is larger than the height I make the base 540px and the height varies according to how big I want my panel to be. On this edit, for eg, both panels are 540x540. It's just a matter of proportions. To make things easier, you can create as much as many new documents as the number of panels you want your post/edit to be (I usually create 4-6).

After I created the new document, I just open my pictures and resize them in order for them to fit the empty document I created. When the size of each pic I want to use is good for me, I drag each one on an empty document and edit each one singularly. To make the simplest edit, I use the text tool and the font Arial in all caps and bold and write the name of the character and the book series at the bottom or I write a quote or anything I want. If the picture is dark or needs to be adjusted, I edit the curves or color correction so that it's better looking or I just download .psd coloring files and drag them so the pics are automatically colored (you can find plenty on tumblr or DeviantArt by searching for "coloring psd"). Then, when I'm satisfied with it all, I save each picture as a single picture and then I upload the set on tumblr as it pleases me... and that's it.

I don't know if it helps but right now I don't have the time for a detailed tutorial with screencaps. I'll try to make one if you're interested :)