#bornchaos

[paleontaxi]

▸   @bornchaos   ⟶   ❛  ❛  i've been a good girl today.  ❜ she said , y'know , like a liar   ❜   ╱   (  dom/sub , accepting .  )

“Oh, really?” Jarod challenged.  It was difficult for him to maintain his scowl with his heart aflutter, staring down that innocent little smirk, Cora’s dimples show in the twist of her painted lips.  “All day, huh?”

He pulled a folded up polaroid from the pocket of his jacket and threw it down on the counter next to them, drawing her attention to it.  It almost physically pained him to act like he hadn’t enjoyed receiving it, like it hadn’t made his day, although it had made the hours between his discovery of it and now agonizing.  It was a photograph of her posing in front of the mirror with the camera in hand, chin tipped up, hair sweeping down her back to give a clear view of her breasts, wrapped in a dark navy bra.

“Are you telling me you’ve got no idea how that ended up in my lunch when you packed it this morning?”

[fxntasmagoria]

@bornchaos gets a starter from Mercedes!

"Some guy paid me 100 to take a selfie with him. So dinners on me." Mercedes said with a smile, stuffing the cash in her hot pink wallet. " I'm having a craving for sushi and some wine. I pulled a double and I need to relax."

[troublcmakcrs]

{ ⊾ } —- favorite rp memory? / { ⋎ } —- favorite thing about the rp community? ( forces you to be nice because its funny ) / { ⊿ } this was talk about your favorite character but amma add spice : talk about your favorite sim character <3

wahhh, i had to leave the mysims rpc after a huge stupid drama blew it up (part of my decision to leave was due to me being busy with school anyway, plus it was just boring to continue in that fandom when half of my rp partners (2 people) suddenly blocked me) but my time in that fandom will always hold a very special place in my heart. it was the first tumblr rpc that i really got into, and it was back in the days of people actually interacting and sending out random asks and tagging their mutuals in random starters. even with only 5 people, a pet rock, and a shoelace in the fandom, the dash felt so vibrant and alive.

i had one ship that i really loved, travis & crystal, wherein i wrote crystal and my friend (at the time) joey wrote travis. they were high school sweethearts, the dumb blond jock boy & the bitchy sassy goth girl riddled with teen angst. and they were sooo cute 💕 i struggle to listen to songs about summer love without going back to them

i do wanna bring my mysims muses back someday, but i'm worried i'll never be able to recapture the magic that was The Thems, i'm sooo :(

     *     *     *

fuck you

my favorite thing about the rpc community is... honestly... just existing as a community. i love seeing everybody's writing and posts on my dash and being able to get inspired by those! while i write entirely for myself (and you should, too!) i find that my writing is better when i'm faced with other writing. there's just something about getting a really good reply from your partner, like when eli hit me with the line "an ouroboros of narcissism" or something like that, that gets me.

you know when you read something so good that your fingers get twitchy and you feel compelled to put them on the keys yourself? i live for that feeling, and it's something i don't get as easily in the fanfiction community. but in the rpc, that feedback loop is pretty much constant

     *     *     *

AGH... how could you make me pick a favorite sim?? :( all of the residents of sunset valley (not you, thornton wolff) have me in a fucking vice. (i'm jk, even thornton gets me, but goddamn he is terrible, but that's what's fun about him. pretty much every time i play with thornton, i make him the biggest bitch imaginable)

but ig... my favorite sim out of all of them is probably mortimer goth. he's definitely gotten the most playtime out of all of the sunset valley townies. i love going against established canon and making him marry the ghost, lolita goth, in his backyard instead of bella bachelor like he's ~supposed~ to or whatever. sb pointed out that that was very twilight-ish, and i'm like. fuck it, idc, maybe twilight has a point. it is kinda freaky, but i think it's cute. weird but cute. let me live, goddamn!!

a very close second is agnes crumplebottom, mortimer's aunt. without player intervention, she will pretty much always die loveless and alone, despite having the "hopeless romantic" trait, and that breaks my heart :( so i intervene as often as i can bc i can't stand to see her die lonely :((

she's a recurring character from... i believe the very first sims game, although she didn't come in until one of the expansion packs. and she made her debut as a crotchety old woman who beat happy lovers who committed pda in front of her with her purse, which ok.......... queen...

but also with sims 3 giving us the backstory that her fiance died right before their HONEYMOON and the implication that she's only bitter about happy couples bc she feels she lost her chance at love... she got me like :(((

(also i just looked it up and i was right. agnes was first introduced in the expansion pack for the sims, "hot date." mortimer has also been in all 4 sims games released so far, in the very base versions of all.)

[hashtag-bitch]

@bornchaos / starter call

"If you're gonna keep starin', love, just open my Voxstagram. Got plenty of bloody pictures there for you t'oggle over." Her tone was flat as she looked over the other with a raised brow. Sometimes being as well known as she was in the Pride ring was a pain in the arse.

[sheldoney]

@bornchaos

"How do you take your tea? Oh and do be careful it's specifically heated to two-hundred and twelve degrees. It's Herbal."

[opportuning]

@bornchaos sent: "really ? you’re gonna do that right here ?" / @ trevor ! -- a sentence meme I can't remember the name of -- still accepting

     “Yes, right here,” he replied as if it was the most OBVIOUS thing in the world. 

     In Trevor’s mind, it really was. He felt particularly UNBURDENED by the lawlessness of Sandy Shores–at least, when it came to things like public drunkenness, indecency, and drug use. So, naturally, it didn’t take him too long to come to despise the city and certainly a good number of the people in it. Still, he wasn’t one to turn down CONVERSATION when it was offered to him–accusatory as the whole thing was. 

     Didn’t help that he still hand his hand resting on the waist of his jeans, Trevor still partly tucked behind the side of his truck. 

     “I always thought you city folks were FAKE FUCKS, but really? It’s a natural bodily function.”

[unfogged-arc]

@bornchaos ♡'d for a starter! mei + coraline.

"That's Snowball!" Mei gives an excited smile as the other shows interest in her little drone. Most people do, but Mei never tires of explaining how he works and how useful he is in the battlefield. Besides, Snowball loves the attention. "He's been with me for a long time now."

[bornchaos]

ʸᵒᵘ ᶜᵃⁿ ⁿᵒʷ ᶠⁱⁿᵈ 𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐣𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝖺𝗍 𝚍𝚒𝚟𝟷𝚗𝚒𝚝𝚢 ! i will be hoarding this url on a sideblog , as it means far too much to me to just let go .

[fxntasmagoria]

" no, not old. but you're, you know, a man. "

A chuckle left his lips. " I'm not even fifty yet but me being a older man just means I have more experience to give, am I right?" He questioned, leaning back from the table. "I'm very experienced. Even was married so that's a whole level of experience. " He picked up a bite of the wings, Mercedes had brought over for him. " She's had nothing but good things to say about you by the way. I trust her judgement. Id like to take you out to an actual dinner, if you're interested. "

[paleontaxi]

Sharp nails trailing along his shoulder blades with the intent to comfort as if scratching a persistent itch, not the hard and vicious clawing usually involved in his encounters with Cora, thrust Jarod, violently in its unexpectedness, back into his early childhood.  There were nights when he would crawl into bed with his mother, either because he had a bad dream or simply out of a desire for closeness with her, and his father would sleep on the couch to give them space.  Jarod felt at once very grown-up, sleeping in the big double bed for adults, and simultaneously tiny and fragile, unable to fill his side of it, relying on his mother to anchor him, prevent him from drowning in the sheets glowing while from the moon in the window.  He lied with his back to her, and she ran her nails up and down it, just like Cora was in the present, and waited for him to sink lower into the mattress.  Sleep always came over her too quickly, and she drifted off before him so that her hand lie limp between them and he could not ask her to keep going.  Jarod would then stare at the wall for the next while, thinking whatever thoughts a seven-year-old boy had to think, until the sound of her snoring dragged him into unconsciousness as well.

The dredging up of this distant memory caused fresh tears to well in Jarod’s eyes, and he choked back another sob.  Goddammit, he had lost her, too.  This, right here and now, was really all he had left, and the spirit of everyone he had ever cared about would die with him.

If that was not proof enough, though, that he had to keep going, he did not know what was.  It was lonely to persist without them, and he thought often about giving up.  However, he was it, and the stark reminder that he was it and that his family would all vanish with him was enough to compel to continue teetering forward, lurching blindly into a dark tunnel that seemed to hold nothing else for him.

Cora’s description of her past sounded so staggeringly like his present.  If he had to hurt, why shouldn’t everyone else?  While he was bent on killing Bob and Sonya, why did it matter how many more innocents got caught up as collateral?  Weren’t they guilty by association with the rotten world?  Hearing his own long-held sentiments parroted back to him in past tense made him twist his neck to look at her with shining, bloodshot eyes.

“A lot of somethings happened to change your mind, huh?” he rasped.  “Think I’m still a few somethings away from that…”  But this conversation was at least a start, the first of his own ‘a lot of somethings.’  He got the feeling that he might remember it tomorrow, even if it would be cast over in a dream-like haze.

“I didn’t know,” he said, shaking his head and laying his rough cheek against her breast.  That only proved her point, though, that everyone was facing some struggle you know nothing about.  He wasn’t the only one who lost someone in the peak collapse.  It was easy to say that they were all Brigades and therefore had it coming to them, but then, what had Lola been?  If anyone said that shit about her, it would gut him.  Not all of them were innocent, that much he was sure of, but…

This was getting a bit too complicated for his current state of inebriation and was, perhaps, something to save for the morning, so he went back to Cora.  “I mean, I figured something had to have happened to you for you to end up here.  It’s not exactly…”  A profession for upstanding young women, died on his tongue.  Cora was a good person, and there wasn’t a way to word what he was trying to say that didn’t sound antithetical to his real feelings on the subject.  “Well, people don’t just think about… without…”  No, he gave up.

“I’m not a good man,” he squeaked, then shook his head more fervently.  “Don’t give me that, not yet.”  There was so much he had to make up for, and he might never atone for some of it.  “If I get better”—because he still wasn’t convinced—“you can give it to me then, not before.”

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐲 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐳𝐳𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 . while it’s always something she subtly encouraged within her clients who share similarities of isolation &. a lack of faith , coraline can’t ever guess who will take that step to break down the barrier of their own routine to welcome in a frightening , unknown change of the other side ; the light can be just as intimidating as the dark .

remaining quiet , hands continue their soothing journey against war torn skin &. allows jarod the space to let go , words were hardly needed at the moment , not until his sobbing came to a stop &. the tears allowed the heaviness of the emotions he held on his sleeve to ease their weight . some of the tears that stained his cheeks end up on skin , though pays no mind . she wonders if it’s an alcohol fused agreement &. while those never hold any weight to them , it was still something to even entertain the conversation .

the questions has her head tilting slightly to the side , eyes trailing face , attempting to detect any hint of bullshit - hands turn to cup his face , thumbs grazing under his cheeks , trying to think of how to respond to the questions ; it wasn’t that she was ashamed of who she was , where her journey began - she’s just not good at putting things into words in this area .

❛ i used to be a nasty piece of work ❜ the best place to start , right ? ❛ i liked hurting people . i was hurting , as long as it wasn’t me … i didn’t care , the world sure as shit didn’t care about me for what it turned me into . ❜ eyes leave his , head falling back against the pillow , staring up at the ceiling - one hand remains on his face , the other having nails drag lightly over shoulder . tongue presses against cheek , trying to piece thoughts together . deep down , the part that always caught her off guard was very much alive part of of her that craved that destruction again , the violence , it was like an itch begging to be scratched , she’ll refuse to , again &. again , not entertaining it even if crimson offered her a way out for good if the cost was giving into the thoughts just one more time .

❛ something … several somethings happened to me , things i couldn’t ignore ❜ the drug addiction that began to sink her deeper &. deeper into a self made hell . lucas , too , he was a huge starting point of realising the life she was living wasn’t sustainable . a twinge of sadness lingers - she hopes he’s okay . voice returns back to normal , steadier than the weaver that slipped it’s way in for a moment too long ❛ i realised i just … couldn’t do it anymore , there comes a time where you realize the well you’re using to poison the village is also where you get your own water . ❜

❛ the how is complicated . everyone begins their journey different because it started for different reasons . for me , it helped to remember everyone has their own story , some struggle that they’re not telling anyone . i’m not the only one suffering , it doesn’t give me a pass to be cruel . simple , yet oddly effective ❜ eyes seek out jarod’s face again , finally comfortable in words to look up .

❛ you have start with what’s doable for you ; maybe treating strangers in your backseat a little kinder , give their stupidity some grace ❜ index finger taps the tip of his nose , a playful pointed gaze .

coraline doesn’t think she’ll ever see the man he does when looking in the mirror , some feral monster cursed for the rest of his days to live life in a murderous rage . he wasn’t damned , he was human &. although it felt like damnation , it wasn’t grounded in reality . there was always light , jarod simply needed to put in the work , step out of the shade an allow himself to bathe in the sunrays .

❛ whatever it is . you’re a good man &. i have faith in you , you’ll find your way , i know it . ❜

[heirtargaryen]

average hotd/got enjoyer : i fucking love incest

[wildlcck]

sadie & what COLOR does your love feel like? x

deep staining red

ripped out confessions, warm velvety whispers and a heart like an open wound. your love flows out like dripping blood, beautiful, flawed and twisted. it's gut wrenching, the type of feeling that makes you clutch your chest, picturing dramatic monologues about love and loving and scenes of sobbing into your pillow until you fall asleep. it rips out of you, clawing it's way up your throat more so than tumbling out. sticky words that just need to be let out, feelings so big they don't fit inside you. your love isn't easy, it's a true bloody mess, dripping and staining everything it touches in a desperate attempt to be seen, to be felt. you love so hard, so deeply, so much for someone who carries all that pain. is your love still flowing? is your heart still open? still pumping and bleeding and dripping with blood and tears? still painting your beautiful pictures and writing your love letters in deeply personal red ink? clench your chest, scream your love, cry it out. spill your words of loving, keep your heart beating, keep your love coming and paint the entire world red with it. keep going. maybe one day the whole world can be red and loved and beautiful just like you.

taggin: @moonrevolutions @onlyappetites @youngtraqedy @bornchaos @allnostalgic @colecassiidy @ambcrinos + all y'all <3

[freeddead]

▸   @bornchaos   ⟶   ❛  could be worse. not sure how , but it could be.  ❜   ╱   (  winnie the pooh , accepting .  )

Gerry looks up just long enough to flash a weak smile.  Though he drops the eyes on his face, the ones on his knuckles watch Cora intently.  He can tell what she’s trying to do, and he appreciates it.  It’s not working, but he appreciates it all the same.

“You’re right,” he says, “we could still need to eat, for example.”  The Eye has ‘blessed’ them both with that much, at least—as long as they keep going and keep looking, they will never go hungry.  “Can you imagine having to scrounge for food in this place?  Especially in a Corruption domain?”  He scrunches up his nose, and his smile twists into something bordering on sincere.  “It’s the small mercies.”

[escalaregalia]

“...what the fuck are you talking about?”

There was a pause as Vaan listened to her babel on about whatever she was saying. She sounded like someone who heard astronomers talking about Mercury being in retrograde and decided that somehow affected their vibes... or whatever the hell they were saying last month...

“Are you gonna try and claim that life has meaning and this wasn’t just some big accident that happened because some shit happened long long ago and started a chain reaction over the course of billions of years that ended in burger king foot letuce and Hello Kitty by Avril Lavigne? You know, I would give it like a thousand years before we’re gone and no one in the universe will remember us.”

❛ a single thread in a tapestry can never see its purpose in the pattern of the grand design ❜ 𝐟𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐬 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲 𝐨𝐧 𝐥𝐚𝐩 , though the pages are forgotten about , skimming the black text but now not truly digesting the words . the thought process is one she once shared , nothing mattered , nothing has purpose , everyone is put here to die ; how bleak . it was easy to fall into , after all the world didn't make it easy to see the bigger picture ; but that itself was a beauty .

do you go to a concert , experience unity &. song just to leave the venue ? do you pick up a book merely to put it down again ? put on a movie for the end credits ? rather ridiculous isn't it ? there is no such thing as an ending , merely another journey to begin .

❛ the universe sings the names of everyone who lives within it , though set at a frequencey that some are unable to hear . it feels the ripple of everyone , every action , every word - for now we are bound by one plane that makes it appear otherwise , but that isn't a forever state . IT DOES MATTER , IT ALL MATTERS . ❜

[unfogged-arc]

@bornchaos ♡'d for a starter! siebren + coraline.

Siebren is staring at the dusky sky, paying no attention to what is going on around him. Others are milling about outside, but he pays them no mind, and they pay him just as little. He's focused instead on the sky, the stars and planets faint in the setting sun's sky. "Something is coming," he says to his companion, though he doesn't glance to her. "The universe feels wrong." The music is in a lower key, slowly becoming more frantic, going through his mind at top speed. "Can't you hear it?" Can't she feel it?

[delinquentborn]

𝑠ℎ𝑒'𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝒒ue͟e͟n 𝒐𝒇 𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒔 . 𝑠ℎ𝑒 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝓼𝗺𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝓯𝒆𝒂𝒓 , 𝑖𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 bi͟o͟s͟p͟h͟e͟re 𝑠ℎ𝑒'𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝓪𝐩𝐞𝐱 𝓹𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫    ⟋        original character  ' coraline eletta jones '  inspired by neil gaiman &. stephen king .        sideblog + childhood blog to bornchaos .