#bluh.
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i forgot to post this yesterday but I watched the movie and IMMEDIATELY dropped everything to open my tablet
#quirinahdraws#doodle#digital#across the spiderverse#spiderverse#spidersona#bluh.#graphic design is my passion or something.#anyhow meet spinneret. hero with a capability for a lot of versatility but about 5% of used in practice#they have three web kinds (red blue and yellow) with starkly different properties and can mix them to create new kinds#so like thereotically you could mix just the right amounts to get a colored web specific to the situation#but spinneret just likes using the same couple of colors a lot and they’re the most used to those :”)#their suit changes colors with the webs by the way because of course it does#the markings on the face and the right limbs are dynamic btw 👍#cool power aside I do not think I would be an excellent spiderman because I am terribly afraid of falls#but whaddya gonna do 😁
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"joining this fandom discord server full of strangers was a mistake" and other things i should have realized in advance
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kicking feet lying in bed writing mock drivers tests while trying to blow them up in my mind
#i dont want to drive but i should so im taking the test tmrw after aaaages of putting it offz#bluh.#Whatever .... Live laugh oil company...#text
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...man... i gotta be up for class in three hours.
fuck. yesterday's bad day just keeps getting worse, even on today.
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I need to write 1400 words today, and at least a thousand of them have to go on the next chapter of This Woman is My Destiny, which is supposed to go up tonight.
And idk, I just kind of feel like I'm. The Worst. but that's fine.
#we had a long day and i'm really fatigued#i need one of my anxiety meds but then i'll fall asleep before i get any writing done#bluh.#skylark prive
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the thing with movie adaptations is just like... instead of being allowed to be transformational work, an exploration of the same story in a different medium, it has to be this money-making thing. you need to have bought the rights to whatever IP, and you need money to actually make the movie, and chances are you have to partner with some big media conglomerate to do all that, and then instead of it being about artists making art and storytellers telling stories it has to be about what execs and shareholders think will sell. it sucks.
The real problem with books-turned-movies isn’t “omg they didn’t include every single word in the book” it’s “omg they completely overlooked the main theme, threw out any significant allegories, took away all the emotional pull, an turned it into a boring action movie with a love triangle in it”
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im the prettiest canary in this mine
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it literally HAS to be okay to choose to be fat in order for fat liberation to mean anything at all tbh
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oc portraits
bonus fish
#esnupi wudsok#failur girhel#piroul hazeul#arscra faulte#matias#artistic tomfoolery#bloodcast tag#windowstruck#procreate#fantroll#Bluh.
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The worst part about wanting to write and share my stuff, is butting heads with myself over whether I deserve it. Like, oh, I'd love to share my crackpot BOTW au on like, AO3, mainly driven by inspiration from another writer! That would be so cool, I'd get to share something I love, show my passions, maybe even get some eyes on my stuff!
Then, I have a bad conversation with my friend who's been helping me with this story, and it just...sucked all the energy from me. Now I can't even think about this story without feeling bad in some way. Is that dumb? Like..is it stupid of me to feel like that? Just lose interest?
Probably? I don't even know. I hit my stride, I was so excited, I was writing so much and I was so happy, and then just....nothing.
Idk, this is stupid to post. Just me complaining to open air.
#txt post#bluh.#I love my friend tho#he's really awesome#I hope I get back into my story. Like. Really really fucking hoping here#is this another autism patch? or is this a trauma response? who knows!#it probably means nothing to the person who inspired me but I really love your stuff#I hope they read my story if it ever does come out#but that's probably me being WAY too hopeful lmao
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i know you don't want to, because it's fascinating, but how about we stop listening to the podcast that triggers us and see if that decreases the irritability, hmm?
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Waiting for layers to dry is so boring.... come on man dry faster...
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love those nights where the melatonin is not enough gotta climb outta my skin
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better than yesterday i think
mortifying ordeal update helped tho
#IGNORE ME#im still thinking about#'it seems like anxiety is the big issue here'#*notes that i am not doing any of the things i want to do bc#as soon as i do i feel like a jar of bees (stress/anxiety)#yeah. maybe ur right#like more to it than that obvs but certainly a component#still convinced that im baseline fine and just making big deals out of nothing#which yeah i actulay am just not in the way i mean that#[brains fine im ok this is a normal level of ??? and its a personal fault htat im stuck]#yeah yeah nobody who knows u but u thinks that -A-;;#bluh.#i dont want to take lorazepam consecutive days in a row tho#id like to be able to handle myself >.<;;
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"he's inscrutable!" to you. I can scrute him
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