#blooming (F@tt)

[nosignofwings]

To the prince we offered twelve thousand flowers, ⸢Blooming⸣ in an untouched field.

15 days of FatT | twitter ↳ day 12: blooming

[swordbreakerz]

Eeoeoeuuuug the intro to tm32 makes me so SAD austins voice as blooming is so so tired and just radiating Sad and I am :((( blooming :(((((

[merymoonbeam]

Light and Dark

Cc3 spoilers. You have been warned. 🫡

My obsession with this connection started when I saw @silverlinedeyes post about the six-pointed star in hosab and I added how I thought it resembled the TT scene elriel has.

We have the six pointed star in hosab and ithan-Hypaxia explained it like this.

Ithan angled his head. “A six-pointed star,” he said. Like the one Bryce had made between the Gates this spring, with the seventh candle at its center. “It’s a symbol of balance,” she explained, moving away a foot, but keeping the dagger at her side. Her crown of cloudberries seemed to glow with an inner light. “Two intersecting triangles. Male and female, dark and light, above and below … and the power that lies in the place where they meet.”

And we have the Elriel TT scene.

Elain looked up at Azriel, their eyes meeting, his hand still lingering on the hilt of the blade. I saw the painting in my mind: the lovely fawn, blooming spring vibrant behind her. Standing before Death, shadows and terrors lurking over his shoulder. Light and dark, the space between their bodies a blend of the two. The only bridge of connection … that knife.

So as you can see by the same color highlighted parts. It matches quiet well. But we are gonna focus on the green highlighted part now.

As you can see ithan thinks that it resembled a six-pointed star when bryce made the drop with the Heart Gate.

Hypaxia said, “Look at the Gates.” The quartz Gates across the city began to glow. Red, then orange, then gold, then white. Firstlight erupted from them. Lines of it speared out in every direction. The lights flowed down the ley lines between the Gates, connecting them along the main avenues. It formed a perfect, six-pointed star. The lines of light began to spread. Curving around the city walls. Cutting off the demons now aiming for the lands beyond. Light met light met light met light. Until the city was ringed with it. Until every street was glowing. And Bryce was still making the Drop. It was joy and life and death and pain and song and silence.

The important part is here that it was the Heart Gate. The center of the crescent city. Map:

One of seven in this city, all carved from enormous blocks of quartz hewn from the Laconian Mountains to the north, the Old Square Gate was often called the Heart Gate, thanks to its location in the dead center of Lunathion, with the other six Gates located equidistant from it, each one opening onto a road out of the walled city.

So it is the...heart. you know what is described as heart in acotar? RAMIEL.

Ramiel. The sacred mountain. The heart of not only Illyria, but the entirety of the Night Court.

A little elain quote:

“When I sleep,” she murmured, “I can hear your heart beating through the stone.” She angled her head, as if the city view held some answer. “Can you hear mine?”

And in my wild hunt post I theorized that Ramiel felt like the gates in a way. Because I think sarah took inspo from the Lia Fail stone from myths. It is one of the four treasures of Tuantha De Danaan. I went into more detail in my wild hunt post I link so Im not gonna add everything here again.

So Lia Fail.

The Lia Fáil was thought to be magical: when the rightful High King of Ireland put his feet on it, the stone was said to roar in joy. The stone is also credited with the power to rejuvenate the king and also to endow him with a long reign.

And we know that ramiel stone heals.

“Who healed you?” Nesta pulled back to survey them. “How are you even here?” “The stone,” Emerie explained, features soft with wonder. “It healed every wound on us the moment it brought us out of the Rite. We arrived here, of all places.”“I think it knew where we were needed most,” Gwyn said quietly, and Nesta smiled.

And we know that with firstlight you can heal. Does the ramiel stone consist firstlight and it works in a gate like way? It literally teleported them? How can it do that?

In hosab we have this:

“Your power came from the Gate—with a shit-ton of firstlight mixed in. So your magic—beyond the light, I mean— needs to be powered up. It relies on firstlight, or any other form of energy it can get. You’re literally a Gate: you can take in power and offer it. But it seems the similarity ends there. The Gates can store power indefinitely, while yours clearly peters out after a while.”

So a gate can take power and offer it and it can store indefinitely. If we take the ramiel as a first light storage of daglan with the ramiel stone it is working like a gate would?? Because in hofas the daglan under prison said they hid many things...under mountains as well.

Vesperus backed up a half step, hissing at the gleaming weapon. “We hid pockets of our power throughout the lands, in case the vermin should cause … problems. It seems our wisdom did not fail us.” “There are no such places,” Azriel countered coldly. “Are there not?” Vesperus grinned broadly, showing all of her too-white teeth. “Have you looked beneath every sacred mountain? At their very roots? The magic draws all sorts of creatures. I can sense them even now, slithering about, gnawing on the magic. My magic. They’re as much vermin as the rest of you.”

We have another light and dark scene with important sword and dagger. The dagger that was in the elriel scene—TT and Gwydion.

They are white and dark light—Alpha and Omega.(I have a post about this)

The male drew it, and Bryce flinched.

Flinched, but—“What the fuck?” The knife could have been the twin of the Starsword: black hilted and bladed. It was its twin. The Starsword began to hum within its sheath, glittering white light leaking from where leather met the dark hilt. The dagger— The male dropped the dagger to the plush carpet. All of them retreated as it flared with dark light, as if in answer. Alpha and Omega. “Gwydion,” the dark-haired female whispered, indicating the Starsword.

And whats important is that with her power bryce can unite them to open a portal to nowhere.

Polaris’s eyes widened as Bryce plunged the blades into her chest. And as those blades thrust through skin and bone, the star in Bryce’s own chest flared out to meet them. It collided with the blades, and both sword and knife blazed bright, as if white-hot. The light extended up through Bryce’s hands, her arms, her body, turning her incandescent— Into a star. A sun.

What's important is that as bryce collects Theia's power that was parted into three parts she starts to realize it is taking a touch of darkness...

Bryce rolled her eyes, but for a heartbeat, Hunt wondered if Thanatos was right: Bryce had explained how the prism in the Autumn King’s office had revealed her light to now be laced with darkness, as if it had become the fading light of day, of twilight—

And we go to that scene...

With a prayer to Cthona, she sent twin beams of light arcing around the prisms, shooting straight into them.Twin bursts of that light flared from either prism, gunning for each other. Bands of light falling into darkness, her power stripped to its most elemental, basic form. They shot for each other, and where they met, light and darkness and darkness and light slamming into each other—Bryce stepped into the explosion in the heart of it. Stepped into her power.It lit her up from the inside, lit up her very blood. Her hair drifted above her head, pens and papers and other office detritus flowing upward with it. Such light and darkness—the power lay in the meeting of the two of them. She understood it now, how the darkness shaped the light.

And the purple highlighted part...it is exactly the same as the six pointed star.

Ithan angled his head. “A six-pointed star,” he said. Like the one Bryce had made between the Gates this spring, with the seventh candle at its center. “It’s a symbol of balance,” she explained, moving away a foot, but keeping the dagger at her side. Her crown of cloudberries seemed to glow with an inner light. “Two intersecting triangles. Male and female, dark and light, above and below … and the power that lies in the place where they meet.”

And if we go by the elriel scene...

Elain looked up at Azriel, their eyes meeting, his hand still lingering on the hilt of the blade. I saw the painting in my mind: the lovely fawn, blooming spring vibrant behind her. Standing before Death, shadows and terrors lurking over his shoulder. Light and dark, the space between their bodies a blend of the two. The only bridge of connection … that knife.

Can you see the connection?

Also that elemental part in bryce's scene. we learn about that in acosf.

Cassian forced himself to sit perfectly still as Rhys dragged a hand through his black hair. “Once, the High Fae were more elemental, more given to reading the stars and crafting masterpieces of art and jewelry and weaponry. Their gifts were rawer, more connected to nature, and they could imbue objects with that power.”

And we know how theia and her line can use the TT and Starsword bc she helped them make them.

Theia extended her hands toward the water, the offered blades. And on phantom wings, sword and dagger soared for her. Summoned to her hands.Starlight flared from Theia as she snatched the sword and knife out of the air, the blades glowing with their own starlight. My mother returned that day with only Pelias and my father’s blades. As she had helped Make them, they answered to the call in her blood. To her very power.

So maybe Azriel and Elain have some kind of elemental magic as well?

Also the stone on top of ramiel...sings.

But when he’d touched the onyx monolith, when he’d felt that ancient force sing into his blood in the heartbeat before it had whisked him back to the safety of Devlon’s camp … It had been worth it. To feel that. With a solemn bow of his head toward Ramiel and the living stone atop it, Cassian caught another swift wind and soared southward.(acofas)

TT and Gwydion also sing.

“Let’s go,” Azriel said, and released her hand. Because the sword and dagger weren’t merely tugging now. They were singing, and all she had to do was reach out for them—

What's more interesting is @icedflames made a post about Fragarach and about the connection between gwydion and tt which came true in cc2 as we learned they were connected.

You have to stand on top of Lia Fail stone with Fragarach.

In Irish mythology, Fragarach (or Freagarthach), known as "The Whisperer", "The Answerer", or "The Retaliator", was the sword of Nuada, the first high king. The sword was forged by the gods and was meant to be wielded only by those who posed above the stone of destiny (the Lia Fail) which roared and the sword whispered in response.

So do we need to take Gwydion and TT to Ramiel? To that Stone? We need Elriel to do it bc all of them are "light and dark"? What will happen if they are all there?

Also dont forget about book of breathings prophecy.

Life and death and rebirth

Sun and moon and dark

Rot and bloom and bones

Hello, sweet thing. Hello, lady of night, princess of decay. Hello, fanged beast and trembling fawn. Love me, touch me, sing me.

Also Fionn dipped the Gwydion to Cauldron.

Another shift of memory, and Fionn pulled a long blade from the Cauldron, dripping water. A black blade, whose dark metal absorbed any trace of light around it. Bryce’s knees weakened. The Starsword. Two other figures stood there, veiled in the thick snow, but Bryce hardly got a chance to wonder about them before Silene’s narration began anew.

And Cauldron sits upon Ramiel.

“The Cauldron,” Nesta said hours later, pointing to yet another carving on the wall. It indeed showed a giant cauldron, perched atop what seemed to be a barren mountain peak with three stars above it. Azriel halted, angling his head. “That’s Ramiel.” At Bryce’s questioning look, he explained, “A mountain sacred to the Illyrians.”

So we are going to ramiel with gwydion and tt? 🫡

[theworldibuilt4you]

"Dearest."

[The word made them jolt upright, a blush blooming across their face like it were an overheating steam engine.]

O-oh. That's... good to hear!

[They relaxed their posture slowly, leaning attentively towards the screen.]

I promise, I won't run away again; it definitely didn't feel good to do, and it's all because I let my thoughts speak for you. I want to be there for you always, and I can't do that if I'm living in my head all the time.

[Their tail swished ever so slightly beside them at their newfound resolve. They felt lighter just briefly, before remembering what they had to trudge up for the second subject.]

Now... I'm sure you felt the latest code hit?

It, um... Was a fair bit different than the others. They've been fairly innocent up until now, but this last one was, uh... Pretty dark. You see... It was a noose.

[Just mentioning it struck sadness in their heart.]

Not sure if it even matters, but I thought you should at least know. Casey and I were thinking there might be some sort of theme, but we can't figure out what it could even be.

-🐍

"..Fv."

[Sonny went quiet for a second, hand placed on his face as he stared forward at nothing in particular. His face was just a little darkened, the cracks pretty visible.]

"...Yvifx... Tpbxs wbwea jjfy... N iazg tt gl vozr kwfrl fwe f jyer lwal hczx bmstfy V ail gmsg vg tpr kcoamaqa... Fbx V aal gmsg ckebgd ryri..."

[He places a hand on his face, where the mouth would be if this vessel had one properly...]

"...N hbbngpg nh bnw mmejzs oxev ptwhpbdmahs ug yizfy... Pog.. Mhml rimg ue zrkzypmivt... uolgl on zd goovovfhwihl.  I.. Q nr hyekijyd gieky... Q... V boma'm aenws nutt bujm'x... Ba..."

[mariusperkins]

January Fic Round Up

It’s been a long time since I did any kind of real fic update, but I honestly post far too many fics to be cross-posting them all here SO: I’m going to do a monthly round-up of my posted fics at the end of the month instead (please ignore that we’re already half way through February lol).

An update of Fiction Is For Fools (f@tt, currently at 15k, sfw), my ongoing Hector/Heard wip, with pov alternating each chapter as we follow Hector and Heard from their first meeting through to their interactions during the ‘Messy Business’ arc of Bluff City and beyond. This is currently at 14/34 and updates on the first Monday of every month, but if you want to wait until it’s finished before you read it I totally get it and I will see you in late 2024.

split gill sentences (f@tt, 4k, sfw), Fero and Samol communicating through the plants of Hieron. I just simply like to write fics about Samol being charmed by Fero and Fero feeling the warmth of Samol being someone who really listens to him.

serendipities of the mundane kind (D20, 33k, sfw), a Fantasy High au imagining a world where the Bad Kids didn’t end up in detention together but found one another anyway.

divine collaboration (f@tt, 3k, nsfw), Memphis Longhand and Trio Trifecta try divine/candidate roleplay. Just two retired athletes in love.

a slowly-growing bloom (f@tt, 3k, sfw), the Blackwick Group gather once again to track down Lyke, only to find that he is lost forever (...or is he?). I love to include flower language in fics and I love Lyke/Es!! I spent the entirety of Sangfielle rotating them in my mind.

following the trail of seasons (f@tt, 6k, sfw), my fic for this year’s Secret Samol! I got an absolute delight of a prompt this year and it was a joy to work on, a fic following Fero through a year in the post-Rhizome era, many years after the end of Hieron.

[magpiemoonchild]

Selling my entire Kpop collection

Selling from BC, Canada

Will ship for extra

[ ] = Available

[X] = Sold

Albums included:

[ ] EXO - Power X2 (35 each)

[ ] Super Junior - Replay (40)

[ ] Super Junior - Play (50)

[ ] T-Ara - What's My Name (Qri) (35-40)

[ ] Tiffany - I Just Wanna Dance (60-70)

[ ] EXID - Full Moon (100)

[ ] Chungha - SET (35)

[ ] TTS - Holler (45)

[X] F(x) - Electric Shock (65-70)

[ ] Red Velvet - Bad Boy (40)

[ ] EXO - Sing for You (PCY) (40)

[ ] Super Junior - Opera (cd&dvd) (50)

[ ] Super Junior - Sexy Free & Single (30)

[ ] EXO CBX - Girls (Xiumin) x2 (40 each)

[ ] Monsta X - The Clan pt1 (30)

[ ] EXO - EXORIDIUM in Seoul (230)

[ ] Kara - Day & Night (65-70)

[ ] Sunggyu - Stories collectors edition (60)

[ ] TVXQ - Truth of Love (Pink) (40)

[ ] TVXQ - Truth of Love (White) (40)

[ ] TVXQ - Chance of Love (30)

[ ] Show Luo - Lions Roar Collectors Edition (60)

[ ] IU - Pallete (40)

[ ] Mamamoo - Melting (50)

[ ] BTOB - Beep Beep signed (50)

[ ] Super Junior - Black Suit (40)

[ ] Super Junior - Sexy Free & Single collectors edition (70)

[ ] Kyuhyun - 1st mini album (40)

[ ] MBLAQ - Love Beat (30)

[ ] 2NE1 - To Anyone (40)

[ ] Infinite - Destiny (25)

[ ] Infinite - Reality (30)

[ ] Super Junior - This is Love (Kangin) (65-70)

[ ] SM the Ballad Vol2 (20)

[ ] Super Junior M - Swing (30-40)

[ ] MBLAQ - Just Blaq (25)

[ ] Girls Generation - The Boys (55-60)

[ ] Super Junior D&E - Ride Me (30-40)

[ ] Miyavi - What's My Name (30-35)

[ ] EXO Countdown (Xiumin) collectors edition (300)

[ ] Super Junior - Mr. Simple (30-35)

[ ] Taemin - Ace (150)

[ ] EXO CBX - Blooming Day - Chen (30-35)

[ ] JJCC - 1st Single signed (70)

[ ] BTS - Wings (I version) (40)

[ ] Super Junior - Devil (40)

[ ] B1A4 - 4th mini album (50)

[ ] Super Junior - Play (Pause version) (35)

[ ] Lisa - Lalisa (60)

[ ] EXO - First Box (60-70)

[ ] KARD - You & Me (65)

[ ] EXO K - Mama (30)

[X] EXO M - Mama (30)

[ ] IU - Real (15-20)

[ ] MBLAQ - Mirror (25-30)

[ ] MBLAQ - Broken (50)

[ ] EXO - Don't Mess Up My Tempo (all 3 versions) (130)

[ ] Girls Generators - Hoot (50)

[ ] Chungha - Off (35)

[ ] Chungha - Hands On Me (25-30)

[ ] UKnow - True Colours (30)

[X] F(x) - 4 Walls (15)

[ ] TVXQ - Rise As God (40-45)

[X] Luna - Free Somebody (25)

[ ] Infinite H (Fly High) damaged (20)

[X] ATEEZ - Treasure (25)

[ ] BAP - Blue (30)

[ ] TVXQ - Humanoids (40)

[ ] MBLAQ - Mona Lisa (40)

[ ] Monsta X - Deja Vu (ver3) (30-35)

[ ] CLC - Nu Clear (135)

[ ] CLC - First Love (150)

[ ] CLC - Free (220)

[X] ATEEZ - One to All (25)

[ ] Blackpink - Square Up (Pink) (30)

[X] SPEED - Speed Circus (130)

[ ] Kahi - Who Are You? (30)

[ ] Monsta X - Beautiful (25)

[ ] Taeyeon - My Voice (60-65)

[ ] EXO - Kokobop the War (40)

[ ] KARD - Hola Hola (45)

[ ] Chungha - XII (150-200)

[ ] EXO - XOXO Repackage (45)

[ ] CLC - Crystyle (200)

[ ] Monsta X - Are You There? (Ver1) (25)

[ ] Monsta X - Are You There? (Ver2) (25)

[ ] SHINee - Year of Us (45)

[ ] Sunggyu - 27 (25)

[ ] EXO - Winter Special 2017 (30)

[ ] EXO-K - Overdose (40)

[X] ATEEZ - Wave (25)

[X] ATEEZ - Treasure (red) (25)

[ ] EXO-K - Miracles in December (40)

[ ] Girls Generation - Mr Mr (40)

[ ] TVXQ - Tense (35-40)

[ ] EXO - Love Me Right (40)

[ ] SHINee - Lucifer (125-130)

[ ] Ryeowook - The Little Prince (30)

[ ] EXO CBX - Hey Mama! Chen (30-35)

[ ] Red Velvet - Red Summer (25-30)

[angrypaperearthquake-tbbb-main]

Yaah!! It's always wonderful to see South Indian teas get appreciated TT Please do enjoy (I hope it's not too expensive tho-) !! This was the longest time I've spent in the US ngl (I've been here during Spring, Summer and Autumn too and so far, Spring has been my favorite!! <3 I have cherry blossoms near my house so they bloomed so beautifully TT Ig my name, Sakura, kinda fits haha!! :'D) so I was really glad I got to spend time with them, I will miss them loads ah :') I have 6 cousins at home -oldest is 15 and youngest is 3 TT Yeah, I end up acting like a mom/10 year old and waste my time (it's quite fun tho ngl) plus there are lots of relatives nearby who come to visit almost everyday haha!! I'm planning to apply in India for my bachelors (medicine is the field I've chosen ah, it's so tough tho...) and idk about my masters just yet but I'd love to try aboard! But yes, it is expensive oof TT Lol- the weather sucks at home man, it gets cold at night but by the time it's morning, you just wake up sweating cause the heat rises to 80 F TT But yeah, my skin cracked so many times here haha!!! It was really cold ngl. DC was really cool during the winter!! We visited many places like the white house and the capitol!! I'm a bit of a history nerd so it was heaven~ And gasp! Nah, m'dude, ice cream in all weather is the thing for me- though ngl, those desserts are making me hungry too TToTT BUT NOT AS MUCH AS THAT PICTURE DID OMG!! Beauty in a plate oof- Do enjoy it well, hun!!! Hope work went well!!! Weekends are coming, yah! (except I don't have weekends because that's when I have mock exams lol) Take care hun, hear from you soon!! Byee!! -🌸

Oh, my dear Sakura-chan. I'm so sorry it has taken me so long to get back to you 🥺 I've been so busy lately between work and church, that I'm having trouble finding time to just sit and do things. I usually end up eating, watching a video, and then going to sleep after work and church stuff.

I'm so happy you enjoyed your time in the US 🥰 And got to enjoy all our seasons! Spring is my favorite time too 🌱 I love gardening, so it make me happy to get back into the dirt and see all the green things!

Wow, you're going into medicine 😱 That's so cool! I don't have the stomach for that stuff 😅 Any specific concentration you're thinking of? Oh, and you have plenty of time before you need to think about your masters 😘

Girl, I bring moisturizer and lip balm wherever I go 🤣 The dryness also depends on the state you're in too! The midwest and west are super dry all year round.

I'm glad you got to visit some historical sites! I've never been to the White House myself, but I've heard it's pretty cool.

I did enjoy my dessert, thank you 🥰

I hope your mock exams went well!!!

Talk to you soon 💚

[backupranger]

Birthday gift for @candidateofloyalty :)!!

[ID: A fullbody drawing of the characters Blooming and Silver from Friends at the Table, Silver, short with long curly black hair and gold fin like ears and scaled gills at their neck, is standing in front with their arms crossed, they are wearing black plimsolls, brown trousers, a white button up that is slightly untucked and a black suit jacket over their shoulders with a red string tied under the collar, they have their eyes shut and is in the middle of talking, looking annoyed. Blooming, tall with short mauve hair and grey/green eyes, is behind also with her arms crossed wearing blue trainers, grey trousers and grey longsleeved muscle fit shirt, looking amused with her eyebrow raised.]

[thisisadecisionimayregret]

Listening to the first holiday special episode of Twilight Mirage and the transition from nearly crying laughing at the entire “yeah uh. Even ate glass” to actually sobbing with grief over Blooming and Empyrean in five minutes is such a mood swing and I’m not ok

[allovertheplace-writing]

Well,I rarely see a Byleth ask so here I am,doing the hidden Byleth fans' work. I'd like some headcanons about how Byleth (both M and F,ofc separate) would fall in love with a student reader there (like how they fall in love with a character from the game) and some general fluff hcs along with it! This is my excuse to see a struggling pining Byleth(s) maybe possibly successing at courting their crush after the timeskip and getting the affection they deserve!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Fire Emblem Three Houses

Character(s): F! Byleth and M! Byleth

Genre: Fluff + Slight Angst

Type: Headcanon

Description: Byleth's relationship with their student through the years and how it bloomed

Warning(s): Cut for Length, Teacher and Student Dynamic(Beginning), Spoilers, Some Hubert Slander, War, Death Mentioned, Reader is Injured(M! Byleth)

So I've never actually finished fe3h and I know the routes you take change things a lot- I'm close to finishing the azure moon route, so I can only use what I've gone through there. I kept it vague, but this is definitely not taking the crimson route into account.

I do hope you enjoy despite my lack of knowledge on other routes! Remember to take care, dear anon ♡

(I also realized this might not be what you were looking for, so I apologize TT)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

   ➢ F! Byleth

It always began with admiration

The diligence and kindness you delivered being all she knew

You would perform well in class and in practice

Although it wasn't long until she found you struggling with a lance near curfew

As your professor she understood she had to help you

She didn't mean to startle you, but she had

"Pah-P-Professor..!"

"Sorry, it looked like you needed help?"

Byleth felt warm with every touch she made whilst fixing your position- a touch on your wrist to a touch on your waist, she knew she was just helping but it flustered her ever so slightly

But maybe she wasn't flustered, perhaps it was just pride

She thought it was the latter

You've gotten much better after some pointers after all!

Byleth enjoys having meals with you, often inviting you alongside another professor or student

She pays plenty attention to what you like without realizing it herself

Manuela is often the one to point out her affections, and the one Byleth ends up going to when she finally realizes she likes you

She decided to keep her feelings to herself, the timing wasn't right and something.. something was happening

She hadn't been sure what until the day Edelgard revealed herself

Byleth almost couldn't believe it

No one truly could

Hubert was shady, but Edelgard was always earnest and looked out for everyone

It could only be described as betrayal, even if she had good intentions

The death.. the bloodshed

None of it was needed

But it needed to end

And eventually it did

It was mere months after Byleth returned

She gathered everyone, even the ones who had long left the church

Just as she always had

And when she found you, she held you within her arms

Relief was the only emotion she had

You were alive

And willing to help at that

It felt like she could finally move forward and take the steps needed to find Lady Rea and end the misery the Empire caused

Once everything settled, once everyone finally got to rest, she went to find you

The quiet within the monastery felt strange, perhaps even unbearable, to you one evening

Everyone could relax, which you were glad for, but the lack of bustling was unsettling

It felt wrong

"(Y/n)?"

Her voice was soft when she called out to you, yet it startled you all the same

"P-Professor..!"

She sighed in content, nothing had changed it seemed

"Are you alright?"

The concern, the love, she held for you had never changed either

"Oh- um.. yes, well... maybe not."

Coming up beside you, she nodded

"I'm.. thinking about how weird it's been, ever since the war ended.."

"It had been a huge part of our lives and now we're moving on, I'm.. I'm not sure if.. I can."

You hadn't noticed the hand she placed upon your own

"That's okay, (Y/n).. you don't have to if you're not ready."

"But it's terrible! I don't know what to do now that it's over and every day I wake to my friends leaving, I feel like I'm stuck.."

"I.. have no plan- no future it seems.."

Gently, she rubbed the back of your hand with her thumb

"..you're the only one who hasn't left, professor."

"That's because I never planned to leave you."

You looked to her, curious as to what she meant

She didn't make you wait for answers, carefully releasing your hand to pull her father's ring from her pocket

"..Byleth..?"

She liked hearing her name fall from your lips, but it did nothing to ease the flutters within her stomach

"..will you marry me, (Y/n)?"

The silence killed her yet she kept her eyes on you

"I- Byleth... o-of course, yes- yes!"

Once the ring secured itself on your finger, she brought you closer

An embrace to a lingering kiss; she showered you in the affections she had kept hidden for so many years

Millions of possibilities were to happen, in this life and the next

And she was happy to be by your side in each to come

   ➢ M! Byleth

Proud

Byleth was proud to call himself your professor

Even if you lag behind other students, you try your best no matter what

He rarely spoke with you outside of lectures, but one evening he found you cleaning windows at the church

"..huh? Oh, hi, professor."

"Hi, (Y/n). What are you doing?"

"Oh! Well, the people who usually clean the windows are recovering from the last expedition so I decided to pick it up for them."

He thought it kind and picked up a rag himself

"P-professor, you don't have to do that-"

"I want to."

The rest of the evening was quiet, but he felt that he got to know you better

When the dance came around he thought of asking for some of your time

He couldn't find you, despite having quite the knack for it

It took him some time so he thought to rest

At the tower

"..professor?"

He.. found you

It was strange how people and things showed up once you stopped looking so hard

Twas amusing to some extent

"Are you alright?"

He watched you hesitate

Noting how you fiddled with your fingers

"..yeah, I've just been thinking."

"About?"

"...you."

He felt his heart leap, he hadn't been sure why

Was.. that the type of fondness he's been feeling?

"An-and of my future..! I'm sorry, that must've sounded strange-"

"Not at all."

"Oh, um.. then not sorry."

Byleth's laugh was soft and breathy

It was a tad scratchy yet it filled the air just as pleasantly

But then he offered you his hand, not speaking for a moment as he seemingly gathered his words

"Would you.. like to dance with me, (Y/n)?"

Neither of you could hear the music well

It was farther, people were farther, than you realized

"Even though there's no music?"

"Even though there's no music."

He smiled when you took his hand

A reassuring, clumsy dance

You and he weren't sure of how to properly move your feet, yet you managed

Swaying one way to another

He allowed you to escape from the worries that plagued your mind that night

But he wasn't able to shield you from the next

Edelgard's reveal was much too sudden, not just for him but for everyone

Flayn and another girl from a few years ago had returned, everything seemed fine- they were fine

Maybe if he didn't let his guard down, you wouldn't have been hit

He knew it was a minor wound, you'd live

But there was so much blood

And you were right beside him

The emotions, they were hard to keep in check

He had people to lead

When the initial encounter was over, he was the one to rush you to Manuela

"You're worked up over nothing, professor! They'll be fine with a few days rest."

She was right, but it was still hard to leave your side

Either way he was forced to

The Empire left no time to dwell

Although, as the information of the battle came and went, so did the mention of Byleth and Lady Rea

Everyone knew they were gone, but none could speak of it

So, when a certain man walked back into the monastery, you were flabbergasted

No words were passed between the both of you, yet you knew what this meant

There was a chance

And as he brought everyone together, the future grew even brighter

The hardships never seized, but they were easier to bare

Having to cut down his past students, having to cut down your own friends, it hurt even when you both tried to ignore it

It weighed heavily on everyone even after the war was finally put to an end

Some were able to move on in the coming months but others couldn't find it within themselves

He was one of those that wished to move on

And he decided that it would begin with you

"(Y/n), I was wondering if I could ask you something?"

He had caught you staring at the church's windows

"..oh, yes, of course."

You watched as he grew stiff, was he not expecting you to allow him?

"Well..."

He took a deep breath before bringing himself to one knee, bowing his head whilst looking at his hand

"What are you doing..?"

He huffed a laugh, " 'm trying to ask you to marry me."

"Oh..!"

"Well?"

"Ye..yes! I- I will!"

"I'm glad."

He was beyond glad, the smile that trembled was enough to get that across

The ring easily fit your finger, just as his hands fit in yours

He bumped your foreheads and then your nose with his own

The warmth of the watching sun bathed you both in happiness unlike any before

And, as he gently brought his lips to yours, the two of you found yourselves swaying... one way to the other

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

[nosignofwings]

The Beloved Knights (again)

[Image Description: A digital drawing of the excerpts Silver (Massalia d'Argent) and Blooming from Friends at the Table's Twilight Mirage, back-to-back in front of a moon background. Massalia is wearing a bright red cape and intricate blouse and Blooming is wearing a blue cape, sash, and dress with purple accents. End description.]

[executiveibex]

FINISHED THE FIRST EP AND. YEAH, SAME, AUSTIN

[TEXT ID]

Janine (as Adaire): If you wanted to give him the cloak, why didn’t you just… when you decided what you wanted dress up in… dress up in the cloak?

Art (as Hadrian): I don’t think it works like that. I don’t think if I’d been like, I hope that cloak I gave away back. I don’t think it works like that. I think it would look like that cloak and that seems super rude. 

Janine (as Adaire): It was… I mean, it was kind of fancy, like…

[Following dialogue is sort of half in, half out of character]

Art (jokingly as Hadrian): 'Hey, I’m here in your husband’s replica clothes.'

Austin: [laughing very hard] Ohhhhh. 

[everyone laughing]

Art (jokingly as Hadrian): 'I’m cosplaying as Samot!'

Austin: I’m sinking all the way into my seat and blushing, I think. I think that’s… Huh! ...Phwoof. Meow.

[END ID]

FINALLY got started on Spring in Hieron this weekend (AKA, listened to the recap ep and half of the first ep) and

ONE. the Seasons of Hieron recaps are genuinely very helpful even when you have listened to the seasons they’re recapping because they will confirm things that flew RIGHT over your head when listening! (realized that those rapiers in Samol’s house belonged to the Hitchcocks! did NOT realize that the Hitchcocks helped build the Buoy!)

TWO. TIME SKIP TIME SKIP TIME SKIP TIME —

THREE. SO not the most important thing in that initial conversation between Fero and Samol but. it IS very important (and hilarious) to me that Samot was the god who invented palm trees and coconuts.

[ubemango]

this tiny space (m)

note: There’s 9 days till Christmas but Fuck it!!!!!! It’s come early because I said so 😎 Welcome back tts universe, and welcome to ubemango teehee 💖💖💖💖

PAIRING. yoongi/reader GENRE. romance, parents!au RATED. M WORD COUNT. 3.2k WARNINGS. toys, shower sex, creampie, oral (f receiving) EXCERPT. Yoongi was always attractive—your sexy piece of ass, as you like to remind him often—and seeing the tight skin of his back when he undresses further makes the insides of your stomach churn in want: the kind that made you want to fall to your knees, grovel. You love having a kid, but it’s been too long.

The duckies are your daughter’s favourite toys to play with, right after Bboong the whale and the lonesome poop squeaky toy drifting aimlessly near the edge of the tub.

“Soonbok, what did I tell you about splashing?”

She slumps into herself, calming the wriggling of her arms. Her little bread rolls softening into the big-girl-arms you don’t want her to grow into just yet.  “It makes mommy wet and it’s not niiiiice.”

“That’s right, baby.”

She distracts herself with the bubbles when Yoongi’s voice floats in from your bedroom. “Babe?”

“Mm?”

“Mom’s asking what time we’re dropping by.”

“Uh—” you wash Soonbok’s hair diligently as she hums a song to herself— “like an hour, I guess?”

“Okay—”

“MOMMY!” Eyes as wide as the moon, Soonbok screams in a sudden act of proclamation, tiny arms stretched above her head. She looks absolutely distraught. “Santa! Cookies? Cookies! We—We didn’t make cookies! Mommy mommy—”

“I know, Soonbok, you’re baking them with grandma tonight. Remember? Daddy reminded you today.”

“Cookies, mommy. We didn’t make the cookies!”

You reach for the basket sitting next to the tub, smiling silently at her worry. Yoongi likes to deny any accusation of her inheriting his dramatic nature but you know she didn’t get it from you. “You’re making them later, baby. Now, put your toys in here so we can clean up, okay?”

She does so without a word, grabbing the floating toys and placing them inside the plastic container. Thanking her softly, you give her a final rinse before draining the tub and toweling her off. She hates this part the most—it gets too cold too fast, and she’d gained the habit of running off naked into Yoongi’s arms when she was 2-years-old, prompting an especially exhausting goose chase around the room to get her into her clothes—so you dry her off as fast as you can, Soonbok’s tiny body shivering already, chanting: “Go, go, go!”

It’s not long before she’s in her pyjamas and bounding off to her daddy as you dry off the floor. It’s not nearly as wet as you’d anticipated, pride blooming in your chest as you think wistfully about how much older your daughter is getting: she didn’t even need to “clean up, clean up” the puddles on the tiles.

“Yoongi, can you help her pack?”

With that you hear a grunt and two heavy feet planting themselves onto the carpet. “Come, Soonbok, time to pack so you can visit Mama!”

A series of whooping and squealing follows the two down the hall. Soon enough Soonbok is packed and ready to go, her winter boots squelching on the thin layer of snow as she runs, her Pororo backpack bouncing along with her. Yoongi locks the door behind you, and stops you before you can head to the driveway.

“I have a surprise later.”

Your eyebrows shoot up. “I’m scared.”

“Have faith, little one.” He smiles wide, clapping you on the back, the beep of the car following. “I promise it’s good.”

Yoongi’s mom’s house is decked out in glowing Christmas lights; metres of every colour imaginable strung all over the window sills, garage door, and even the 13 foot pine tree sitting out front. Soonbok had always admired the effort her grandparents put into decorating, and questioned constantly if you would do the same for your house. You’ve forgone any sort of warehouse shopping for lights because Yoongi is cautious about the electricity bill, however, and Soonbok had claimed offense right away. She spit in your face the next second: “That’s shitty.” 

(Yoongi broke his back laughing, and you had to claim the bad cop title that night when you scolded her. She’s a lot nicer now.)

Mama opens the door just as Yoongi places Soonbok down after lifting her up to press the doorbell. “My pretty granddaughter! You’re here!” She bends down and places a million and one kisses on your baby’s face while she squirms helplessly.

“Merry Christmas Mama!” Soonbok literally screams after breaking free from the barrage of obligatory Mama Kisses.

“Merry Christmas to you too, our pretty Soonbok.” She holds her  hand, bringing her inside with a quick tut of stomp your boots so the floor isn’t icky. Soonbok happily makes garbled noises—she does this when she does something intensely—as she focuses all her strength into the soles of her feet as she removes the snow from her boots on the doormat.

“Oof! Oof! Gone! Gone! Gone!”

Yoongi looks at you with a disturbed face. “She’s so violent,” he whispers.

“It’s cute!”

“She’s like a mini bulldozer.”

“Yoongi.”

He pinches your wrist, then brings your hand to his mouth, kissing it.

“We’ll be back in two days, ‘kay baby?” You lean down once she’s finished stomping, pressing a kiss to Soonbok’s sweaty hair, pushing it away from her eyes. “You be good for Mama.”

“M’kay,” Soonbok says. “Will I—Will I miss you?”

You can feel Yoongi shake in laughter. “I don’t know, baby. But daddy and mommy will miss you so much.”

Yoongi is next. He steps forward, bending his knees slightly, putting his hand up in invitation. Soonbok doesn’t hesitate to highfive him. “You love daddy?”

“Yeah.”

“You gonna miss daddy?”

“Yeah!”

“You gonna kiss daddy bye bye?”

Soonbok leans into the cheek Yoongi presents to her. Places the tiniest peck with as much pout as she can muster. Mama gives you both a hug and a kiss, and ends pleasantries with quick motions of her hands to shoo you two away.

“Have fun! We won’t call you for help,” she says as she sees Yoongi about to interject. “Go. We love you.”

“Thank you Mama,” you say, and off you and your husband go, waving at your daughter who can barely reach her head over the window frame to see you leave as you settle in the car. You’re on the road with the radio low when Yoongi speaks.

“What time is the party?”

You check the clock on the radio: 7:02 PM. “Two hours, ish. Why?”

He hums. “Just wondering.”

Coming home with no screaming three-year-old is off-putting, to say the least. The lights turn on to a dull hum, fills the empty space as you remove your coat. Yoongi tosses his keys somewhere behind you, and promptly sidles up to your back. He leads with a kiss on the back of your neck.

“Feels weird,” you say.

“Hm?”

“Without her here.”

Yoongi squeezes you with his closed embrace. “I miss her already.”

You turn around and kiss him like no one’s watching; a reality just out of reach on any other day but very, very tangible now as you feel Yoongi press his lips insistently on yours. Hot intimacy long overdue and shortly lived when you breathe, “It’s—I’m just—like—waiting for her to pull on my pants or something.” You know it’s the most unsexy thing to say, but Yoongi’s tongue prods into your mouth anyway.

“Stop—talking about our daughter.”

“Sorry.”

He shrugs, then takes your hand. “Wanna shower?”

“Please.”

The mirror is already beginning to fog up when you come in with towels, placing them on the sink as you admire your very much shirtless husband. Yoongi was always attractive—your sexy piece of ass, as you like to remind him often—and seeing the tight skin of his back when he undresses further makes the insides of your stomach churn in want: the kind that made you want to fall to your knees, grovel. You love having a kid, but it’s been too long. (Soonbok had been battling a nasty flu over the past two weeks, allowing you and Yoongi virtually no time together.)

“You’re so hot,” you say.

Yoongi snorts. “Get naked.”

You do, quickly. The battering of the water soaks just right along your skin, Yoongi’s warmth following. Being in this tiny space with him fills you with a stupid amount of giddiness. Meeting under what feels like secret circumstances, a tryst you’re not supposed to indulge. He mouths a sigh along your shoulders. “Missed you like hell.”

“I know, baby. Pass the soap?” It’s the apricot wash he hands you. “Tired?”

“Nah.”

You scrub; Yoongi massages the suds in his hair. Stealing kisses to your neck when you don’t expect it. The water is scalding, but his touch scorches you. “Oh—what was surprise you were talking about earlier?”

“Mm. Finish up and I’ll tell you.”

It’s like fuel, his promise. He laughs at your rush to rinse off, bottles nearly bowled off in your haste.  You know he won’t blame you for being too eager, though. The liberation that comes with being a parent with no immediate responsibilities makes you feel unbelievably sexy.

You spin to meet your front to his; chests hot, noses bumping. Arms melting into the soft of his shoulders when you reach around him. “Tell me!”

He molds his mouth onto yours in answer, hands searching for your ass before squeezing. “I miss you.”

“I miss you too, fathead.”

“Sit down here and let me service you, wife.” An easy command you raise your eyebrows to. The shower bench is distractingly cool against your ass. Yoong’s immediate drop to his knees brings your attention back. He lets you slide till you’re comfortable, grabbing the slick of your calf to rest beside his ear. “So I have, what—a little less than an hour and a half to make you cum?”

“Yessir.”

His fingers are pruned cold when they spread your pussy. “You’re delectable, I hope you know.”

There’s a tease of his nail on your clit, then the hard suck that follows. You shiver right into his touch. “Hhhh—God.”

The water from the showerhead rains steady on his back. A lustful dimension of steam and fogged-up glass. His tongue slides a dangerous path along your slit, taking the buck of your hips with the same enthusiasm.

His strokes batter your clit straight on, all his frustrations from not getting to pay attention to you the way he wants all honed in on the slick of his saliva. Claiming all your heat with his mouth, an intensity you try not to shy away from so you close your eyes instead.

“Yoongi—oh—!” He’s suckling like he’s starved. A nice reminder that your pussy is still his preferred meals for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Your thigh twitches with every pulse of his puckered lips, tips of your fingers sliding helplessly along the shower tile, no traction for your desperation.

“Oh,” you whine. Blearily seeing Yoongi with his own eyes shut tight, mouth sealed on your sopping sex, your nipples taut. His hair sticks to his forehead. “Shit—”

He groans into you. Switching gears and pressing his head deeper in between your thighs if only to assure that he gets every single drop of desire you have to offer. His head bobs with every sharp indulgence, tongue twisting fast into the wetness you offer, noises from your throat spilling faster than you can keep them down.

“I’m—close...”

He’s got either thigh on his shoulder in an instant. The unholy mixture of your arousal and his spit slides right down your ass, filth of it all squeezing your thighs to his ears. “Oh my god.“ The squelch is lewd, a sound only half registering through the buzz in your ears from how loud you’re getting. “Fuck, Yoongi, I’m—!”

It’s the last barrier holding the dam together bursting. Your orgasm rips right through you, the speed so alarming it’s all you can do not to buck his head off completely. The tightness at your cunt unfurling right into Yoongi’s waiting mouth, your hips grinding into his heat. Your eyes roll back with the collapse of your mind into ecstasy.

He doesn’t stop. Not until you’re panting through pleas, thighs trembling into a close. He fends it off with insistent hands.

“Yoongi, oh my God—please—no more—!”

The pop is loud when he loosens his suckling. “All I’d do, you know. This cunt?” He taps your pelvis affectionately, watching your come-down with a hunger he doesn’t try to hide. “The best.”

“Mhm,” you pant. “I’ll—I’ll let her know you think so kindly of her.”

“I’ll send a gift basket too. Cranberries, pineapples?”

Your legs are dead weights when you drop them down. “That’s good—I’m sure she’d like that.”

“Good.” He accepts the kiss you give him. Slow in your exchange, sticky with the taste of your tang. 

The glide of his fingers along your chest is tentative. He’s careful with the squeeze of your tit, but you press forward with silent encouragement. It’d taken a while for you to warm up to Yoongi touching you like this, with the confidence to accept his attention. The part of motherhood that mangled all the youthful parts away from you consumed most of your sex life after having Soonbok, sucked especially out of what was once your pert chest, the smooth skin of your stomach. Yoongi was patient, though. You didn’t fuck with the lights on for a solid two months, and that was only until your daughter had learned to sleep through the night. “I still haven’t—I still have something for you, baby.”

You lick into his mouth. “I have the feeling we won’t be on time for the party.”

“Seokjin will understand the needs of a man who was desperate to ravish his wife after a two week dry spell—“

“Relax, wise guy,” you retort. “Show me what you have. I missed you too.”

Yoongi opens the door, reaching over to rummage for something in one of the baskets on the floor. He presents to you a—

“Vibrator? Yoongi that’s gonna get wet—“

It’s an annoyed look he sends you. “Made sure to get a waterproof vibe, genius. Now get up against the wall, my knees hurt and I’m—so fucking hard.”

“Should I face you?”

He shakes his head. “I—Will you let me fuck you here?” You realize belatedly that the water is, in fact, still running.

“I don’t think I’ll cum though.”

Tutting, Yoongi waves the vibe around. “I’ll make you feel good. Now spare some ass, please. Lube?”

“No, it’s—it’s fine.” The tile is a comforting cool on your forehead, stifling that warmth when the head of his dick presses against your core. Yoongi rubbing along your slick, closing your eyes at the near-foreign feeling of hitting it from the back because that’s just too loud in the cloak of a late night. He bottoms out with an ease that makes your fists curl tight.

“Oh—shit.”

“Feel good?”

“Yeah—oh. Please.”

Suddenly all you know is the pounding of the shower water, the pounding in all the right places. It’s dizzying, trapped in the fever of his drive. He buries his head in your neck, your name strangled in his throat. Then he puts the vibe against your clit.

The sensation is new, a shaking of your nerves that has you reeling. “Oh fuck.”

Yoongi rams his hips with vigour unmatched, breath stunted. “Shit you feel so—fuck how close—can you cum?”

“N-No,” you say. Or: whimper, because regardless, you feel light. The quiver of the wet silicone slips in his hold, too busy keeping the pace you’re both losing yourselves to.

He shuts the vibe. “Hold this, please.”

The faucets squeak shut. Yoongi slips out, a slow preamble to his haste when he nearly tears off the shower curtains, reaching for the towels you’d laid out. Drying you off isn’t as graceful as you’d like but neither of you are pressed for a complete towel-off at this point—he completely ignores your hair to dry off with the other just as quick.

It’s almost funny, him dragging you by the wrist from the warmth and straight into the cold air that hits too fast, but not as fast as Yoongi finding the mattress and pushing you down face first. He slaps your ass for good measure. “Sorry, I—holy fuck. Please let me make you cum.”

“In. In in in—”

He’s quick to fill you up. Yoongi pistons his dick like he’s never known a slower alternative. Testing your ability to keep up but your hips are locked with his grip.

Something’s missing. And you feel it—limp in your hand, the vibe shut off. It’s on with a shaky press of your thumb. You’re quick to introduce the revving where you pulse. You know Yoongi feels it when he swears. Landing a quick slap to your ass in retaliation but you love when he makes you take it. ”Shit, keep going.”

The skin on your ass stings. Moans in tandem with each smack of his palm. The toy digs deep in your clit, breath hitching because you feel it. You’re drowning in it. “Oh god Yoongi—just like that—”

You hear him talk but it sounds like cymbals clashing, nothing coherent registering in your head. Just noise in the roughness of your love, the roar in your ears overwhelming any sense of using your tongue to speak so you mewl instead.

His hips are damp against your ass. The sound is nasty in all the right ways. It’s got your gut twisted in the absolute need to just—you just—

“Yoongi I’m—”

Both hands hold your hips up higher. You cum like this, crying into the sheets, suns and stars rearranging in the dark of your closed eyes when you succumb to the explosive relief. Dropping the vibe onto the sheets because you’ve lost all sense of a good grip, clutching the bed like it’s your lifeline. You bury Yoongi’s name in the sheets.

“I’m cumming—I’m cumming-—” he declares. He stutters in rhythm, pumping cum deep where you drip. Groaning low, fingers tight on your skin. “Oh my god.”

You reach down with shaky hands, shutting the toy off. “I’m dead. I can’t—feel my legs.”

Yoongi makes a choked noise. “You know when you cum I see the seventh heaven?”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“What’s it like?”

He pulls out, lets you collapse onto your back. “What, feeling you cum? It’s—euphoric.”

“Ooh, big words.”

“Only the best for—” he taps your pelvis once more— “the best pussy.”

“Come here, stupid.” Yoongi crawls over you, uncaring of the mess left all over your cunt. “Kiss me.”

He does. It’s languid, sweaty—the softness that comes post-intense sex. You feel a surge of adoration run through you when your legs tangle. “I love you,” you say.

He sinks his lips into yours again. “Same to you, momma. Now go pee, I’ll change the sheets.”

You feel a tug on your chest. “So sexy.”

“And I’ll dry your hair.” You feign a shudder. Yoongi smacks your ass in faux-haste. “Go. We’re late as it is.”

“That is not my fault!”

He tuts. “Go and pee so we can call Soonbok before she sleeps.”

By the time you’re prim enough to go on video chat, Soonbok has just brushed her teeth. “Hi baby. Are you ready to sleep?”

Soonbok is very focused on her dolls. “Yeah, mommy. I’m tired.” She says this like an overworked maid. A thirty-year-old tinge of exhaustion probably from changing and feeding her dollies, and you stifle a laugh. “Mama, I’m sleepy.”

“Sleep well, Soonbok,” Yoongi pipes up from behind you, just about to put on his jacket. “Be a good girl, okay?”

“M’kay daddy. You be good too, ‘kay?”

“Will do, baby.”

You say bye after Soonbok hands the phone back to Mama, exchanging good nights as Yoongi helps you slip your coat on. Seokjin won’t be too mad at your tardiness, you hope. Seeing the tired smile of your baby is all worth it. And Yoongi smiles, knowing you.

“I miss her,” he says. Pushing down the instinctual need to check the baby monitor, you press forward out the door.

“Me too.”

[itsthebreakdown]

Year: 2012

Music Bank

M Countdown

Show Champion

Inkigayo

Chances to Win

Show Champion - 25  

M Countdown - 52

Music Bank - 53 

Inkigayo - 53 

Total - 183 (+27)

Show Breakdown 

Show Champion

2 AM: I Wonder if You Hurt Like Me (1) 

4Minute: Volume Up (2) 

Beast: Beautiful Night (1) 

BoA: Only One (1) 

CNBLUE: Hey You (1) 

F.T. Island: Severely (1) 

F(x): Electric Shock (2) 

Girls’ Generation-TTS: Twinkle (3) 

Infinite: The Chaser (1) 

John Park: Falling (1) 

Kara: Pandora (1) 

Miss A: Touch (2) 

Shinee: Sherlock (Clue+Note) (2) 

Sistar: Alone (1) 

Super Junior: Sexy, Free, & Single (3) 

Wonder Girls: Like This (2) 

M Countdown 

4Minute: Volume Up (2) 

Apink: My My (1) 

Beast: Beautiful Night (3) 

Big Bang: Blue (1), Fantastic Baby (2) 

Busker Busker: Cherry Blossom Ending (1) 

CNBLUE: Hey You (1) 

F.T. Island: I Wish (1), Severely (2) 

F(x): Electric Shock (3) 

G-Dragon: Crayon (3) 

Gain: Bloom (1) 

Girls’ Generation-TTS: Twinkle (3) 

Infinite: The Chaser (3) 

K.Will: Please don’t (2) 

KARA: Pandora (1) 

Lee Hi: 1 2 3 4 (3) 

Lee Seung-gi: Return (3) 

MBLAQ: This is War (2) 

Miss A: Touch (1) 

PSY: Gangnam Style (3) 

Seven: When I Can’t Sing (1) 

Shinhwa: Venus (1) 

Sistar: Alone (1) 

Super Junior: Sexy, Free, & Single (3) 

T-ARA: Lovey-Dovey (2) 

Yang Yo-Seob: Caffeine (2) 

Music Bank 

2 AM: I Wonder If You Hurt Like Me (2) 

Ailee: I Will Show You (2) 

Beast: Beautiful Night (1) 

Big Bang: Blue (2) 

CNBLUE: Hey You (1) 

F(x): Electric Shock (2) 

G.NA: 2HOT (1) 

Girls’ Generation-TTS: Twinkle (3) 

Infinite: The Chaser (1) 

IU: You and I (2) 0

Jay Park: Know Your Name (1) 

Jo Kwon: I’m Da One (1) 

K.Will: I need You (1) 

Kara: Pandora (1) 

Lee Seung-gi: Return (1) 

Psy: Gangnam Style (16)

Shinee: Sherlock (Clue+Note) (2) 

Sistar: Alone (2), Loving U (2) 

Super Junior: Sexy, Free, & Single (2) 

T-ARA: Lovey-Dovey (4)

Teen Top: Going Crazy (1) 

Wonder Girls: Like This (1) 

Yang Yo-Seob: Caffeine (2)   

Inkigayo

AIlee: I Will Show You (1) 

B1A4: Tried to Walk (1) 

Beast: Beautiful Night (1) 

Big Bang: Blue (3) 

CNBLUE: Hey You (1) 

F.T. Island: Severely (1) 

F(x): Electric Shock (2) 

Gain: Bloom (1) 

Girls’ Generation-TTS: Twinkle (3) 

Hyuna: Ice Cream (1) 

Infinite: The Chaser (2) 

IU: You & I (1) 

K.Will: Please Don’t… (1) 

Lee Seung-gi: Return (1) 

Miss A: I don’t Need a Man (1), Touch (1) 

PSY: Gangnam Style (6) 

Seven: When I Can’t Sing (2) 

Shinee: Sherlock (Clue+Note) (3) 

Sistar: Alone (2), Loving U (2) 

Super Junior: Sexy, Free, & Single (2) 

T-ARA: Lovey-Dovey (3) 

Teen Top: Going Crazy (1) 

Trouble Maker: Trouble Maker (1) 

TVXQ: Catch Me (2) 

Wonder Girls: Like This (2) 

Yang Yo-Seob: Caffeine (3) 

Achievements

Triple Crowns:

Beast: Beautiful Night on M Countdown 

Big Bang: Blue on Inkigayo

Girls’ Generation-TTS: Twinkle on Inkigayo, Music Bank, M Countdown, Show Champion 

G-Dragon: Crayon on M Countdown 

Infinite: The Chaser on M Countdown 

F(x): Electric Shock on M Countdown 

IU: You & I on Inkigayo, Music Bank 

Lee Hi: 1,2,3,4 on M Countdown

Lee Seung-gi: Return on M Countdown 

Psy: Gangnam Style on Inkigayo [x2], Music Bank [x5], M Countdown 

Shinee: Sherlock (Clue+Note) on Inkigayo 

Super Junior: Sexy, Free & Single on M Countdown, Show Champion 

T-ARA: Lovey-Dovey on Inkigayo, Music Bank 

Yang So-Seob: Caffeine on Inkigayo

First Wins: 

Ailee with I Will Show You On Music Bank

B1A4 with Tried to Walk on Inkigayo 

Busker Busker with Cherry Blossom Ending on M Countdown 

Hyuna with Ice Cream on Inkigayo 

Girls’ Generation-TTS with Twinkle on Show Champion

John Park with Falling on Show Champion 

Lee Hi with 1 2 3 4 on M Countdown 

Teen Top with Going Crazy on Music Bank 

 Trouble Maker with Trouble Maker on Inkigayo 

Yang Yo-Seob with Caffeine on Music Bank 

Milestones 

55 Wins

Super Junior 

Big Bang 

40 Wins 

Psy 

35 Wins

Wonder Girls 

25 Wins

Seven 

Shinee 

20 Wins

T-ARA 

Lee Seung-Gi 

KARA

F.T Island 

15 Wins

F(x) 

Beast

CNBLUE

Overall 

Highest Points for Song: Psy - Gangnam Style - 334,194 Points

Highest Number of Wins for One Song: Gangnam Style - 25 Wins 

Highest Points per Group: Psy - 334,194 Points

Highest Number of Wins per Group:  Psy - 25 Wins

Rank

Psy - 25 Wins

Girls’ Generation-TTS - 12 Wins

Sistar, Super junior - 10 Wins

F(x), T-ARA - 9 Wins

Big Bang, Shinee - 8 Wins

Infinite, Yang Yo-Seob - 7 Wins

Beast - 6 Wins

F.T. Island, Lee Seung-Gi, Miss A - 5 Wins

CNBLUE, K.Will, Kara, Lee Hi, Wonder Girls - 4 Wins

2AM, 4Minute, G-Dragon, IU, SEven, TVXQ - 3 Wins

Ailee, Gain, MBLAQ, Teen Top - 2 Wins  

Apink, B1A4, BoA, Busker Busker, G.NA, Hyuna, Jay Park, John Park, Jo Kwon, Shinhwa, Trouble Maker - 1 Win  

Notes

Video at the top is the song with the most wins.  If it is a tie, then it will go to the song with the highest points cumulative over the year, if it is still a tie, I put the songs on a random list and it chooses one.  

There were no recorded points for this year. 

I will be marking Milestones after 15 wins every 5 wins.  Sometimes within a year, groups will skip some milestones and just reach the next one.

Links

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Inkigayo_Chart_winners_(2021)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Show_(South_Korean_TV_series)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Show_Champion

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_M_Countdown_Chart_winners_(2021)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Music_Bank_Chart_winners_(2021) 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Show!_Music_Core_Chart_winners_(2021) 

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bZkp7q19f0 

Music Show Masterlist  

Masterlist 

[sonjongdae]

tagged by the lovely @hangeuk ♥

I super, duper went overboard with this because i’m indecisive as heck dfhjfdkhj. but these are definitely some of the albums that I could listen to even 15 years from now and still love every single song on it ;;;; 

tagging: @jongzdae @amaranth @tipannies @aominne @sonxiumin + anyone else that would like to do it, heh 

make your own here. 

album list: 

Baekhyun - City Lights

BoA - Kiss My Lips

BOL4 - Red Planet

BTS - YNWA (shout out to LY: Answer) 

Chen - Shall We, AAAF

Day6 - Moonrise (and Letting Go ♥)

Ed Sheeran - +

EXO - Love Shot, Universe (and, like, the rest of their discography TT)

EXO-CBX - Hey Mama and Blooming Day 

F(x) - 4Walls

IU - Chat-Shire, Palette 

Jonghyun - Story Op 1 & 2

LOONA yyxy - Beauty and the Beat

Luna - Even So

Mamamoo - Melting, Reality in Black

Minseo - The Diary of Youth

Red Velvet - TRFF, The Velvet (and like exo, i basically love all of their albums in different measures) 

Sejeong - Plant

Seohyun - Don’t Say No

Shannon Williams - Eighteen 

SHINee - TMOU

SNSD - Mr. Mr. 

SNSD-TTS - Holler

Suho - Self-Portrait

Taeyeon - I, Purpose

Taylor Swift - 1989, Lover (and I didn’t add it here, but Red, as well;;; ) 

Tiffany Young - Lips on Lips

Wonder Girls - Reboot 

[taeken-my-heart]

Independent {f} Chapter 15

Summary: Your mom calls you stubborn, your friends call you wild, and the boys you’ve left in your wake call you a frigid bitch.  You’ve built a life of independence and you like it that way. Kim Taehyung, however; seems to be able to change your mind.

Pairing: Taehyung x ReaderGenre: fluff, mild angst

Word Count: 5152

Warnings: Ongoing themes of death. Her father is always mentioned briefly. 

**There is a read more linked but it doesn’t seem to be working and I don’t know what to do about it. I’m sorry! TT 

                                                        ~~~~~

~ 2 months later ~

March brought with it weather that was warm enough to allow for apple blossoms to bloom and an improved attitude in the general population. There was a tendency during the dead of winter to let the gloom of the skies seep into your skin, but with spring there was a new beginning. 

It was a Thursday, and as such, you didn’t have your first class until 1pm so you’d slipped on your boots and a jacket over your sweater before grabbing your camera bag and heading out the door. With flowers blooming, there was new opportunity to add to your growing portfolio so you moved away from campus and towards the park. The edges of the lake were surrounded by vibrant cherry blossoms and violet larkspur. The ice had melted from the water leaving it crystal clear and inviting. 

You’d purchased a new tripod only a few days ago and were anxious to give it a try. Your mom and Paul had been kind enough to give you some money to purchase a nice one, otherwise you would have had to make do with the $10 one you’d bought off Amazon 3 three years ago that had honestly seen better days. 

There was a lot more sun to accompany the new warmth of the season and it made for incredibly beautiful pictures. You found a spot overlooking a small creek, setting up your tripod amongst a crop of trees and trying to decide what angle you were wanting to take. You knew that with spring came not only new blooming flowers, but new litters of animals and this park was always prone to an abundance of rabbits. 

While some people thought they were a nuisance, that was mostly in areas with homes where they would nibble and ruin the gardens. In this park, they were absolutely lovely and you were really hoping to get some good pictures, if you could spot any. They were a beautiful part of nature and you really loved highlighting that sort of thing. It wasn’t the level of excitement that a fashion show in Paris could bring, but for you it was just as good. 

The sunlight was perfect this time of morning. High enough to wake the world, but not so high that the trees couldn’t block it out with their tops. It cast a beautiful shadow over the ground and you peered through your camera’s viewfinder to decide where you wanted to aim first. 

This park was wonderful in that it was large and brought up the rear of a forest on the outskirts of campus. It was home to a lot of wild life and in the edges of the trees you spotted a doe and her fawn.  

You smiled, setting your camera onto your new tripod and focusing the lens towards the mother and her baby. Two doe eyes, captured in the memory of your camera for your viewing pleasure. You pulled your gaze away from the viewfinder, glancing down into the display at the image that awaited you. 

                                                       ~~~~~

Most of the morning was spent exploring the forest. The winter made a habit of separating man and nature from one another and you’d spent far too much time trapped indoors and not nearly enough outside exploring what the world had to offer you and your camera. This semester so far was helping you to remedy that fact. 

You had more time on your hands and in an effort to get over Taehyung, you’d become more inclined to spend time doing your favorite thing. It had been healing in all the best ways and it had also given you the time and privacy to evaluate your feelings on everything that happened. For a while you’d blamed yourself a lot, really been hard on yourself about the way you’d reacted to the situation, but over time you began to cut yourself some slack. 

You’d come to realize that your fear of commitment stemmed from your fear of the lack of control you had over things that were important to you, specifically your heart and the people that filled it. 

It wasn’t just from when your dad died, though that had made a big impact, but it was also from just feeling like you couldn’t control the outcomes of your relationships. You’d seen a lot of people open themselves up over the years and in the end, they’d gotten hurt. It was hard to want to leave yourself vulnerable to that sort of thing in your own life. 

It seemed like less and less people wanted to put in effort these days and at first you had denied that you fit in that category, but you soon realized that you were prime candidate. The fear of failure and the fear of not being accepted for exactly who you were had caused you to decide that not trying and protecting yourself was a much better option than anything else. 

It seemed silly now, to think that those were thoughts that had been plaguing you for years; that somehow the broken pieces of your heart would be so unlovable that you needed to shield yourself away. You didn’t love people any less for their flaws and imperfections so why were you holding yourself to such an unreasonable standard? 

Learning to love yourself was going to take a lifetime of practice, but you’d realized with pleasure that loving yourself enough to allow others to love you too was going to be an exciting adventure. And Danielle was right, daily mirror pep talks had been such a help. It had been so weird at first, but it was nice to remind yourself of the things you liked about who you were and to find new things, too. 

After packing your equipment up, you made your way back to the house, dropping off your things and getting your school bag ready. You grabbed a binder off your desk, pulling it towards you and pausing when a piece of paper fell down onto the carpet of your bedroom. 

You sigh, stuffing the binder into your bag and shuffling around to the other side of the chair to pick up the paper by the leg of your desk. It wasn’t paper, though, and as you flipped it over you realized it was a picture that you’d printed out months ago, back when you’d thought maybe you and Taehyung could work things out. 

You’d prepared a big long speech to try and convince him of how sorry you were and even printed out this picture to give to him; the picture you’d taken on the first night he’d ever spoken to you. 

He was so beautiful, lips peeled back into a smile, eyes nearly closed in his mirth as he danced with a couple friends and one of the dancers from the fall festival. It seemed like so long ago, but really it had only been a little over 5 months. You’d thought it would be a nice little gift; the picture he’d expressed interest in. You’d never been able to give it to him, though. Thinking of him still hurt, so you stuffed the picture back into the binder now taking residence in your bag and fastened the clip into place. 

You still had 30 minutes before you needed to head out for class, but you were bored, so you slung your bag over your shoulder and began to make your way onto campus. People were sitting out in the quad, enjoying the sun and the new warmth it brought with it. You didn’t think it was quite warm enough to be sitting out in the grass for long periods of time, but you couldn’t fault people for craving the fresh air that the outdoors brought.

You’d made it half way through the quad before a familiar tuft of dark hair was making its way towards you and like you were on autopilot, you called out his name, walking carefully over to him when he looked up at you. His eyes were warm when they landed on you and it made your heart want to burst in your chest. 

Maybe there was at least hope for a friendship. 

“Hi.” You breathed, stopping in front of him. He looked down at you, smile quirking the corner of his lips and this time you allowed your heart to race wildly. It felt like it had been forever since you’d seen that beautiful smile. 

“Hi.” He repeated; hands stuffed in the pockets of his jeans. 

“Um,” you cleared your throat, “Hi. How are you? How have you been?”

He smiled again, this time a little fuller. “I’m good, how are you?”

“Yeah, I’m OK,” you shrugged, then shook your head. “No, you know what, I’m good. I’ve been spending a lot of time taking pictures and it’s given me a lot of space to really think through everything I’ve had going on inside. So yeah, I’m good.”

“I’m really glad to hear that,” Taehyung smiled and you couldn’t help but return the gesture, “you deserve to feel good.”

“Thank you, Taehyung.” You whispered, staring down at the floor, “you do too. I hope…I hope you’ve been good, that you’ve been happy.”

“I have been.” He nodded and your heart clutched; bittersweet. You were glad he was happy, you only wished it could have been you to contribute to that.

“H-how’s Beth?” You asked hesitantly. You really hoped he wouldn’t think your intentions were bad; this time you really did want to wish them well. 

“Ah,” He chuckled, shrugging his shoulders. “Actually, we broke up about a month ago.”

“Oh!” You could feel your heart drop into the pit of your stomach. That was not at all the answer you’d thought he’d give and your heart ached for him. “Tae…Taehyung, I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he smiled, waving it away, “it was a pretty mutual decision. We just didn’t mesh the way we’d thought we would.”

“Oh, well I’m glad you don’t feel bad about it.” You said softly. Just then you remembered the picture in your bag and pulled it around to the front of your body quickly. “Oh, I just remembered. I have something for you.”

Taehyung’s brows furrowed in confusion and you slowly pulled the picture from your bag, holding it out to him. He took it gingerly, staring down at it like he wasn’t quite sure what he was looking at. 

“It’s from the fall festival.” You explained, shrugging awkwardly as he looked from the picture to you and back again. “You said a while back that you wanted me to give you a copy, but I was pretty bad about getting it to you. I actually printed that a few months ago after I got back from Paris. I meant to give it to you but…well, anyway. I thought you might still want to have it.”

“Thank you,” he smiled up at you, fingers clutching the picture delicately. “This means a lot to me.”

“I’m glad.” You nodded, shuffling your feet underneath you. “Anyway…I, uh, I have class soon so I should probably go…”

“Oh, yeah, ok.” Taehyung nodded, tucking the picture into the breast pocket of his long, checkered button up. “Well, it was nice seeing you, Y/N.”

“Yeah,” you nodded, smiling, “it was really nice.” You waved awkwardly, making your way around him, heart thudding in your chest as it screamed at you to stop being such a coward. You’d taken all of three steps before you stopped and turned quickly.

“Taehyung!” He stopped, glancing at you over his shoulder and you quickly made your way back over to him. 

“I would really like to go grab coffee sometime; you know, as friends. Just do some catching up.” You trailed off, voice losing all its confidence as he stared at you, the intensity of his gaze frightening all the courage right from you. 

His contemplation scared you and you were just about to backtrack, take everything back and scurry into a cold dark place where you could lick your wounds anew when he smiled, nodding. “I’d like that.”

“Really?” You breathed, staring up into his dark brown eyes. 

“Yeah,” he chuckled. “We could go to Grounds tonight, if you want. I’ll be out of class at 4pm.”

“OK!” You grinned, “should we meet there? I get out of class at 3:30.”

“Sounds good. Let’s plan to meet at 4:20?” He asked, adjusting the bag on his shoulder and you nodded enthusiastically. 

“I’m looking forward to it.”

“Me too.” He grinned. You waved again before turning back around and heading up the hill towards your class.

                                                       ~~~~~

The walk to class was quick after that, mind racing excitedly at all the possibilities that your upcoming meeting with Taehyung held. You weren’t foolish enough to believe that he’d be willing to give dating another chance after everything that had happened, but you at least hoped that the two of you could be friends again. 

Today’s classes were usually pretty interesting, but they couldn’t hold a candle to the excitement you felt about later in the afternoon. Paying attention was difficult, even though everything was very hands on, your body was full of nervous energy, fingers twitching at your sides as you watched your partner do her piece of the project. 

“What’s up with you today, you seem on edge?” She asked, looking back at you. 

You switched your gaze towards her, snapped from your thoughts, and smiled. “Ah, I’m just meeting up with a friend that I haven’t seen in a while. I’m pretty excited.”

“Is this friend a guy?” She teased, motioning for you to take your place behind the camera and you chuckled. 

“He is, but it’s not like that, I swear.”

“Sure.” She hummed and you focused on the lens of the screen, watching the people on the other side. The music department was putting on a production later in the semester and had asked your class to film a series of small ads to broadcast the show. 

You were lucky to be going to a university with such a strong arts and humanities program, not everyone could say the same of their schools. Most of the universities you’d originally been looking at had focused a lot of their money into their sports programs, and while that was also important, it wasn’t what you were looking for.

“Lisa,” you said, glancing at your partner over your shoulder, “what do you think of the aspect ratio?”

                                                           ~~~~~

Your last class of the day was digital art history, and while typically you liked the laid back and dimly lit lecture hall, today it was too little distraction for you. Your professor was going through slide after slide of information visualization and you’d been lost to him about 10 minutes into the lesson. 

Sometimes you liked to sit in the back of the lecture hall; on days when you were tired and hadn’t gotten enough sleep. You’d close your eyes and take a 10-minute power nap, but today you’d chosen to sit in the direct front and center in order to force your attention and it still couldn’t distract your mind from later. 

You’d had a whole speech planned out months ago, but now everything was different. You didn’t want him to think you couldn’t be just friends; that you only wanted to use him again. You’d give anything to show him just how willing you were to have him in your life in any form, but you weren’t sure what words to even use. 

How could you show someone you cared so much about that you really just wanted them to be happy, even after causing pain? You’d learned a lot about yourself over the last few months, been much more willing to give yourself a break. Every relationship has two participating people and Taehyung had his own faults in the breakdown of the relationship as much as you did, but you hoped he’d be willing to work passed it the way that you were. If he wasn’t, well, you wanted to wish him a sincere good luck anyway. 

Sometimes when you cared about a person enough, you had to be willing to let them go, even if it hurt you. You’d definitely survive without Tae if he chose to walk away…you just didn’t want to have to. 

The class ended after what felt like a million years and you quickly packed your bags and made your way back into the mild weather, taking a deep breath of fresh air. You still had some time before you met up with Taehyung, it was only just after 3:30 so you made your way home quickly, determined to drop your things off and take a breather before you met up with him.

Anna was in the kitchen when you stepped into the house, dropping your jacket by the door and tossing your bag onto your bed. She was sat with a bowl of peanut butter and apples when you made your way towards her and she looked up and smiled. 

“Hey, what’s up?”

“Not much,” you said casually, opening the fridge, peering inside and then closing it, pacing your way over to the cabinets and peeking inside each one in turn.

“Um…you seem nervous.” Anna commented, turning to face you. 

You smiled over your shoulder, leaning your back against the countertop and drumming the tips of your fingers against the laminate counter top. “Actually, I’m meeting up with Taehyung in around 40 minutes.”

Anna’s mouth dropped open, apple slice dropping to the floor. “Oh crap,” she grumbled, climbing out of her seat to grab the apple and throw it in the trash. “Wait, so…did you say you’re meeting up with Taehyung?”

You chuckled, nodding and she continued. “Why? I mean, not that I’m not happy for you, I just don’t understand. I’m missing a lot of details. Fill me in, woman!”

“It’s nothing crazy, I just saw him in the quad today, we talked a little bit and then I asked if he’d want to meet up sometime for a drink.”

“Wow, did he seem happy to see you?”

You smiled, nodding, “yeah, actually,” you looked down at the floor tongue running along your bottom lip. “He did seem happy to see me which is the only reason I asked. I thought maybe we could try being friends again or something.”

“I think that’s really awesome!” Anna grinned, coming over to hug you and you returned the gesture, arms tightening around her thin frame. “I’m so excited for you! Are you OK with being just friends, though?”

“Yeah,” you nodded as she stepped back from you, hands resting on the countertop, “I know he probably doesn’t trust me anymore; you know? So, I’m happy if we can be friends. Even if he decides he doesn’t want to be…as long as he’s happy.”

“I’m really proud of you.” Anna smiled, “you’ve grown a lot these last few months. You’re so much more open and willing to talk about things. Sometimes when you care about someone enough, you have to be willing to give up on the things you want, relationships can’t be selfish, you know?”

You nodded, pushing away from the countertop and going to sit at the kitchen table, Anna following behind you. “I’m starting to learn that,” you sighed, “for a long time I was afraid of relationships because I didn’t want to get hurt. You get so connected to people and then when they’re not there anymore it’s really hard to recuperate.”

“You don’t grow without hard life lessons,” Anna frowned and you mumbled your agreement.

“I guess I realized that I was being selfish with my emotions and to myself. No relationship comes easily or without work and I was holding myself back from how fulfilling relationships could be by shutting myself off.”

“It’s so easy to do.” Anna commiserated, “it’s not easy to let people in, especially when you’ve been hurt in the past. You are so normal, Y/N, I hope you know that. Everyone is holding themselves back from something.”

“You’re right, I haven’t been nice enough to myself. Right now, I’m trying to find a balance between opening up more without giving up myself. I finally realized that I’m worthy of the love that people want to give me.”

“I think you are so awesome,” Anna smiled, “you’re kicking butt and taking names.”

You laughed, shaking your head and standing. “That’s my queue to go. I need to freshen up a little before I leave.”

                                                            ~~~~~

The coffee shop was welcoming in its familiarity. There was no longer a fire in the hearth, but the heating was running and you welcomed the warmth. The late afternoon had turned crisp and you only had a light jacket to keep you company. 

You resisted the urge to pace, nerves like live wires under the tips of your fingers, seeking one another out as you rung your hands together, making your way to the cash register. 

After ordering a small tea, you walked to a nearby seat to wait. Again, the shop was not overly occupied. There were a few customers here and there, two young women around your age sitting together by the fireplace talking animatedly with mugs of coffee in hand and smiles on their faces. 

Most of the coffee shop occupants were studying with laptops and books strewn across the table. It was the perfect atmosphere for studying without the distraction of home. 

Your order was called and you found a spot closer to the back of the store where you could wait. You’d arrived a few minutes early so you imagined Taehyung would be here any minute now. 

Your feet bounced with nervous energy and you twisted them at the ankles to try to still your nerves. You weren’t sure why you were so worked up; you didn’t really have high expectations for this meeting or even for any type of relationship. You hoped the two of you could be friends, but you respected him enough to move on if that’s not what he wanted. 

Your heart leapt into your throat as you saw him enter through the door and you smiled softly as he glanced around the room before his eyes focused on you, small, goofy smile spreading across his lips. He motioned towards and the registers and you nodded, waiting patiently while he went and placed his order before he made his way over to your table. 

“Hi.” He said and you couldn’t help your grin.  

“Hey.”

He sat down, smoothing down the sides of his leather jacket, fingers patting anxiously down his thighs and then clasping together in his lap. 

“I’m glad you could come.” You said, twisting at the end of your shirt. Taehyung’s eyes darted to your fingers before back up to your eyes. 

“Me too.”

The two of you sat in silence for a few moments before Taehyung’s name was called and he ran back up to the counter to get his drink. It felt so strange to be this weird around him, you were so used to conversation just flowing and now it felt like you were back at square one. It was a little discouraging, but to be expected. You weren’t going to let it set you back, though. 

“So how are your classes?” You asked as Taehyung returned and he looked at you in surprise. You released you’d asked rather loudly and wanted to groan in frustration. “Sorry, I’m being so awkward.” You sighed. 

Taehyung chuckled, sipping at his drink and shaking his head. “It’s fine. My classes are good, some are boring, others are fun. The usual. What about yours?”

“Same,” you smiled, “although most of my classes are pretty cool this semester. A lot of really hands on stuff which has been keeping me interested.”

“See, that’s what I need in my classes,” Taehyung said, leaning back in his chair, “if I’m not engaged, I lose interest so quickly. Lecture style just does not work for me.”

“How are the guys? Jimin, Jungkook. I haven’t seen them since the beginning of the semester.”

“Everyone’s good, yeah. Jimin and Jungkook have both been doing a lot of dance training recently; they both want to get into the recital next year so they’ve been fine tuning their skills and they’re often in the dance studio anytime they have a break from classes and homework.”

“That’s so exciting. I’ve never actually seen them dance so I might have to sneak by the studio sometime and try to have a peek.”

“I’ll take you sometime,” Taehyung laughed, “I’ve got the in so I know which room they practice in.”

Conversation lulled into a comfortable silence for a moment as you both sipped at your drinks and you watched Taehyung’s eyes slide closed at the taste. “So,” you cleared your throat and he shifted his eyes to yours. “How was California? I know Jin’s going be heading out when he graduates at the end of the semester, but what about you?”

“Ah, yeah, I went to California over the break to meet with the company and it was really great. I kind of feel like I have to pinch myself every day because they’re paying for the rest of my education and they pay for me to come out there during each break from school so I can get some specialized training in while I’m finishing everything up here. Once I graduate, I’ll move out there and really start getting into the meat of the company.”

“That’s really cool, Taehyung!” You grinned, “I can’t believe they’re paying for everything. It makes sense, though. Invest in your talent, you know?”

“What about you?” He asked, changing the subject quickly, “how was Paris? I’ve never been to Europe so I’m really jealous.”

“It was really good,” you nodded, “I mostly worked, but I did get to go see some tourist attractions and it was amazing. I learned a lot while I was there, not just about photography, either. I met this really amazing woman named Danielle. She was kind of like my mentor during the whole thing and we talked a lot about our life experiences and she just taught me a lot.”

“Like what?” Taehyung asked, head tilting to the side and you smiled. 

“Like how to be kind to myself; how to forgive myself. I realized I was cutting myself off from a lot of things that would bring me happiness because I didn’t think I deserved it and I was afraid of the what ifs. What if something goes wrong? What if I get hurt? What if I’m taken advantage of? That kind of thing.”

“Did I ever make you feel that way?” Taehyung asked suddenly and you looked up at him, eyes wide, “because if I ever made you feel pressured or taken advantage of, I’m so sorry. I should have been more patient; I should have been more understanding.”

You could see his grip tighten on his cup and your heart squeezed in your chest. 

“Stop,” you said, reaching out your hand to rest over his own, feeling his grip loosen. “I’m not here to blame you and I’m not here to blame myself, either. I blamed myself a lot after everything kind of fell apart and then I learned I wasn’t being fair. We’re not perfect people, Tae. I wasn’t good at expressing how I was feeling and I wasn’t allowing myself to understand why I was feeling that way in the first place. I’ve always been very independent, but especially after my dad died. I was afraid of putting my trust in someone who could walk away and leave me hurting. In the end, I hurt myself by being so closed off because I was limiting my potential. I also hurt you and I’m so sorry that I did. I hope you know that I really did want the same things you did; I was falling just as hard as you were, I just didn’t know how to get from point A to point B.”

Taehyung paused, staring down into his cup and you allowed the silence to sweep over you. You knew him well enough to know he needed to think and you could accept that. You’d laid yourself bare to him and you weren’t sure what to expect, but you would wait and accept his answer when it came. 

“I missed you a lot.” He said suddenly. His eyes never left the drink in his cup, fingers tapping along the edges. “When I was in California, I thought about you all the time. I even tried looking on your Instagram, but you’re not very good at posting on there,” you chuckled and he smiled up at you, “sorry, that’s creepy.”

“No,” you shook your head, “I looked at yours too. For the record, I have put up more pictures recently.”

“I noticed.” He admitted with a blush and your heart warmed at the thought. 

“I missed you too, Tae. You became a really good friend to me and I was devastated when I lost that.”

“You haven’t lost that.” He insisted, “you haven’t lost me.”

You paused, trying to gather your thoughts. “You know,” you said softly, picking at some fluff on your jeans, “I’d be willing to try again. To start over.”

“You’d be willing to try what again?” Taehyung asked, inching closer to the edge of his seat.

“Everything,” you admitted, “friendship…dating…honestly, I’d take whatever you’re willing to give, even just meeting up once a month for a drink and a chat. I just really miss you.”

“How about this,” he paused, lips pursing and then coming to sit beside you on the loveseat, “open communication. My feelings about you haven’t changed, but I am a little more guarded. Let’s start over. Whenever we have something on our minds, we need to say it. If you feel a little trapped, you tell me, if I feel a little insecure, I’ll tell you. Whatever it is, we’ll discuss it.”

“OK,” you nodded, “then in the interest of open communication, I have something to say.”

Taehyung smiled and you continued. “I still like you too...a lot; and right now, I really want to hold your hand.” 

His fingers linked delicately with your own, eyelashes dropping down onto his cheeks as he pulled your hand into his lap. “How’s this?” He asked.

“Good.” You breathed, staring up at him, dark eyes meeting yours. “You’re so beautiful.” You whispered. 

His smile was blinding as he brought your hand to his mouth leaving one small kiss to your knuckles. “So are you.” He then reached for his cup and held it up towards you. “To new beginnings.”

You grinned, grabbing your own and clinking it against his. “To new beginnings.”

                                                     ~~~~~~~

This is the second to last chapter! Wow! Next chapter will be the conclusion to a story that I started in 2017. I’m excited and sad to say goodbye, but not gonna be too sad yet. We still have one more chapter! Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think. To be honest, this chapter gives me mixed feelings, but maybe that’s just because all the feelings of the OC are the ones I’m going through right now so it’s very personal. 

Love you guys!

Nora

Chapter 14

Chapter 16 (finale)

Copyright © 2017  by taeken-my-heart (Nora.) All rights reserved.