#bled out
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"The Complete Maus" - Art Spiegelman
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so one of the things that's so horrifying about birth control is that you have to, like, navigate this incredibly personal choice about your body and yet also face the epitome of misogyny. like, someone in the comments will say it wasn't that bad for me, and you'll be utterly silenced. like, everyone treats birth control like something that's super dirty. like, you have no fucking information or control over this thing because certain powerful people find it icky.
first it was the oral contraceptives. you went on those young, mostly for reasons unrelated to birth control - even your dermatologist suggested them to control your acne. the list of side effects was longer than your arm, and you just stared at it, horrified.
it made you so mentally ill, but you just heard that this was adulthood. that, yes, there are of course side effects, what did you expect. one day you looked up yasmin makes me depressed because surely this was far too intense, and you discovered that over 12,000 lawsuits had been successfully filed against the brand. it remains commonly prescribed on the open market. you switched brands a few times before oral contraceptives stopped being in any way effective. your doctor just, like, shrugged and said you could try a different brand again.
and the thing is that you're a feminist. you know from your own experience that birth control can be lifesaving, and that even when used for birth control - it is necessary healthcare. you have seen it save so many people from such bad situations, yourself included. it is critical that any person has access to birth control, and you would never suggest that we just get rid of all of it.
you were a little skeeved out by the implant (heard too many bad stories about it) and figured - okay, iud. it was some of the worst pain you've ever fucking experienced, and you did it with a small number of tylenol in your system (3), like you were getting your bikini line waxed instead of something practically sewn into your body.
and what's wild is that because sometimes it isn't a painful insertion process, it is vanishingly rare to find a doctor that will actually numb the area. while your doctor was talking to you about which brand to choose, you were thinking about the other ways you've been injured in your life. you thought about how you had a suspicious mole frozen off - something so small and easy - and how they'd numbed a huge area. you thought about when you broke your wrist and didn't actually notice, because you'd thought it was a sprain.
your understanding of pain is that how the human body responds to injury doesn't always relate to the actual pain tolerance of the person - it's more about how lucky that person is physically. maybe they broke it in a perfect way. maybe they happened to get hurt in a place without a lot of nerve endings. some people can handle a broken femur but crumble under a sore tooth. there's no true way to predict how "much" something actually hurts.
in no other situation would it be appropriate for doctors to ignore pain. just because someone can break their wrist and not feel it doesn't mean no one should receive pain meds for a broken wrist. it just means that particular person was lucky about it. it should not define treatment.
in the comments of videos about IUDs, literally thousands of people report agony. blinding, nauseating, soul-crushing agony. they say things like i had 2 kids and this was the worst thing i ever experienced or i literally have a tattoo on my ribs and it felt like a tickle. this thing almost killed me or would rather run into traffic than ever feel that again.
so it's either true that every single person who reports severe pain is exaggerating. or it's true that it's far more likely you will experience pain, rather than "just a pinch." and yet - there's nothing fucking been done about it. it kind of feels like a shrug is layered on top of everything - since technically it's elective, isn't it kind of your fault for agreeing to select it? stop being fearmongering. stop being defensive.
you fucking needed yours. you are almost weirdly protective of it. yours was so important for your physical and mental health. it helped you off hormonal birth control and even started helping some of your symptoms. it still fucking hurt for no fucking reason.
once while recovering from surgery, they offered you like 15 days of vicodin. you only took 2 of them. you've been offered oxy for tonsillitis. you turned down opioids while recovering from your wisdom tooth extraction. everything else has the option. you fucking drove yourself home after it, shocked and quietly weeping, feeling like something very bad had just happened. the nurse that held your hand during the experience looked down at you, tears in her eyes, and said - i know. this is cruelty in action.
and it's fucked up because the conversation is never just "hey, so the way we are doing this is fucking barbaric and doctors should be required to offer serious pain meds" - it's usually something around the lines of "well, it didn't kill you, did it?"
you just found out that removing that little bitch will hurt just as bad. a little pinch like how oral contraceptives have "some" serious symptoms. like your life and pain are expendable or not really important. like maybe we are all hysterical about it?
hysteria comes from the latin word for uterus, which is great!
you stand here at a crossroads. like - this thing is so important. did they really have to make it so fucking dangerous. and why is it that if you make a complaint, you're told - i didn't even want you to have this in the first place. we're told be careful what you wish for. we're told that it's our fault for wanting something so illict; we could simply choose not to need medication. that maybe if we don't like the scraps, we should get ready to starve.
we have been saying for so long - "i'm not asking you to remove the option, i'm asking you to reconsider the risk." this entire time we hear: well, this is what you wanted, isn't it?
#where's the word woman in this u might wonder if u suck#good news i am nonbinary and have a uterus so that is something that can happen#im also gender fluid tho which means im immune to certain psychic damage bc if u call me a woman i'll be like <3 okay <3#writeblr#the tightrope of ''ppl need access to this''#and like also#''what the fuck is going on over there'' is like. so difficult as an activist#i was <3 punctured <3 during mine#and almost bled out on the table :) they didn't have anyone standing by bc it's ''just a little insertion''#so i started crashing and i vaguely remember apologizing for the fuss as i heard my heart rate monitor start going <3 tachycardic <3#she wasn't even a bad doctor tbh#ps btw the reason i even HAD a heart monitor is that i have a genuine heart condition and they knew GOING IN that there was a chance#i'd crash on the table#like my heart just likes to do fun little tricks and <3 stop working <3 (i do not want to discuss the specifics ty i am okay im ontop of it#and they were like 'oh u will be fine' and then she did do a puncture thru my uterus . pop!#and im sitting there dizzy and feeling my heartrate start to drop bc it feels almost. beautiful. like. the whole ground just#woosh! out from under you. and shit is like grey's anatomy. i'm looking up at her grey eyes#she's old she wears this nice shawl she's like got Cool Lesbian vibes and people are sprinting into the room#from other parts of the clinic unrelated to me. while the monitor is like a little aria singing#and shes like hey youre okay stay awake stay with me something went wrong we have to keep trying#and i remember thinking - i was trying to think of nice things. i have so many beautiful places that now overlap#with this terrible memory#i became dimly aware that there was too much on her wrists and hands. like#that was too many liters#and then when they had finished all this. i packed up and drove myself home#i have had (bad thing) happen to me. and the same feeling happened after#that numb almost lamblike bleating. you cry without noise. like. ur body is so shocked and ur mind so empty#you just stare at the road and everything everything is happening behind glass and static and you are standing so far away from it#while you hold ur hands at 10 and 2. and something in ur brain is SCREAMING at you - IT WAS BAD AND IT SHOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED#and ur just watching the alarms in your body going off and youre thinking. a little pinch! ha. i think i just lost something important.
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Quick little yakuza 5 majima angst because of what majima says abt haruka and kiryu in a certain end fight
#artists on tumblr#art by op#yakuza#majima goro#rgg fanart#rgg#yakuza 5#sawamura haruka#idk I was just thinking about harukas criminally insane stepfather#and the lengths he would go for her and kiryus happiness#what if we were girls and we bled out in an alley :33#drew the pattern on his jacket because I’d do anything for him#I’m gonna be so honest though I don’t like this very much lol
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I'll never trust him again
#amazingphil#dan and phil#dnp#phil lester#daniel howell#dan howell#danisnotonfire#phan#captioned#im fine i just bled so much out of my ass I fainted and spend days at the hospital phil pls
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// Vibrant Colors!! Eyestrain!!
A gift for my friend, @veilyco
Error Chillin’
V2 & Speed Paint below 🔽🔽
Flash warning (it’s a speed paint)
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ho-tan time bc i LOVE HERRRR
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#storm darragh stole my power and signal so im posting this while in the car to get food lol hopefully power comes back soon!#and i hope anyone also in the storm is staying safe!!#anyways ho-tan time. I AM IN LOVE WITH HER#pen bled a bit in some places but oh well#aaaaa quick type tags before im out of signal again#yonderland#my art#six idiots#larry rickard#ho-tan#scribe elder ho-tan#yonderland fanart#aaaaaaaaAAAH
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Oh evan dying because of K is so pivotal to every character actually
#saw a post saying if they were evan they wouldnt forgive k#and yeah cause he literally bled out in front of them because she thought she was doing the right thing#k being so consumed with needing to fix things is a perfect flaw#ily consequences to your actions#mismag s2#mismag#mismag spoilers#misfits and magic#misfits and magic spoilers#d20#d20 spoilers
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you know it just occurred to me that this may not in fact, be a common experience, so im curious what the general stats are.
by "feel pain in dreams" i mean if an event happens in your dream that would induce pain, do you feel it as accurately and acutely as you would in real life?
#i had a dream last night that a circular saw flew into my leg and i bled out and died#and it felt incredibly real and i felt the pain after i woke up all the way until i got up to brush my teeth#i feel excruciating pain in dreams that lingers until i get up and get going such that like....#every 5th morning i wake up i think i developed with some insane bone condition overnight and will need to go to the dr#but nah#its just literal psychic damage
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Sooo... how did everyone like episode 3
#the joke is that he was right! king of manifesting the delusions#disgruntled bc two of the akutagawa death memes i had prepared require his last smile to atsushi. so i have to wait another week#which. UGHHHHH#anyway i WAS going to make this into a proper fake tweet. but there's something so funny about just covering up the original text#does this count as spoilers..?#like do anime onlys realize that he had his carotid artery severed and there is literally no saving him#like he bled out and died after 10-15 seconds#anyway. teehee! (curled up in fetal position sobbing)#bsd 5#bsd 5 spoilers#bungou stray dogs 5#bungou stray dogs season 5#bsd#bungou stray dogs#nakajima atsushi#akutagawa ryuunosuke#shin soukoku#sskk#bsd memes#bungou stray dogs season 5 spoilers#a.txt
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Its safe to say Nandor kind of sucks at cheering people up, especially when they involve dragging friends to more familiar fights
#wwdits#wwdits fanart#what we do in the shadows#nandor the relentless#guillermo de la cruz#my art#nandor x guillermo#I’m sorry if Nandor’s pose looks out of character#I was listening to Disney villain songs all day#Mainly “this is the thanks I get” cause I can’t decide if I like it or not#And it obviously bled through
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okay really. what's "augustus" doing here? where'd that third voice come from? the whole web tape plan was about capturing the voices of the archivist and those closest to him and sending them through the portal, and jon and martin were on the tapes the most, but if that's just how the voices were selected then the third voice would be basira (third most appearances) or gertrude (third most read statements). so where'd that voice come from? if the criteria was that it took the voices of the people who were most vital to the apocalypse and the spreading of the fears, then surely we'd have annabelle over martin. so where'd that voice come from? if the three voices are just the three people who died and vanished in the panopticon, then surely that voice would be elias's, jonah's original body got turned to "ashes swept away by the winds of ecstatic terror." how would this program have nicked the voice of a corpse that hadn't spoken in over a century? why would it have done that? what's the reasoning here? Where Did It Come From? hello is anyone hearing meeee.
#like I THINK it's jonah classic's voice. But Why. How.#man was naught but eyes in the end. extremely dead eyes that bled out on the floor fifteen minutes before the tower exploded.#tmagp#marina marvels at life
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Anyway I’m going to talk about the Joel dream I had on the same night as the evil Xisuma dream. So here’s what I remember about it
Irl content creator Joel Smallishbeans randomly died. Irl content creator Grian fully flew across the ocean to tell irl content creator Scar the news in person for some reason. They are both distraught and hug.
Then Grian gets a phone call from irl content creator Lizzie. He answers it. Lizzie is full on cackling on the other end of the line. They have a short conversation I don’t remember. Then Joel’s voice comes over the phone, muffled and sluggish like he just woke up. I have no clue what the plot of this dream was but from what I can discern with my waking mind, Lizzie had faked her husband’s death while he was sleeping. Just like. As a prank I guess.
#it was a weird night. I was very tired and all the hermitcraft videos started coming out so#I think it just bled into my dreams. in a very strange way#raven rambles#going to maintag this bc I think it’s funny#goodtimeswithscar#grian#smallishbeans#ldshadowlady#🐦⬛
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what is that bleeding from her neck ...
#alien stage#alnst#alien stage sua#alnst sua#these collars are shit why are they leaking thatll burn her#(pretending its not the other thing but HOW)#well#their name chips also work as a form of a shock collar right. so she mightve actually bled out via her neck#and she hides the right side of her face how comforting
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BILL'S CONTRACT FINE PRINT DECIPHERED
I'm sure someone has beat me to this, but because I decided to decipher/translate all 1000ish words of the fine print on this here totally normal contract (by hand)
Bold code is theraprism substitution cipher, the rest is the author's substitution cipher, i've reformatted the text to be more readable but i've also made a version with the more accurate, original line formatting here
YOU ARE NOW TWENTY ONE GRAMS LIGHTER
THIS CONTRACT IS LEGAL AND BINDING, WE RESERVE THE RIGHT TO USE YOUR LIKENESS, FACE, VOICE AND SMALL TOWN PLUCK IN WHATEVER NEFARIOUS MANNER IS DEEMED NECESSARY.
SANS SOUL YOUR SOULMATE WILL NOT RECOGNIZE YOU AND WILL WALK RIGHT PAST YOU ON A COLD AUTUMN DAY, NEVER MAKING EYE CONTACT, NOT EVEN PROCESSING THAT YOU HAVE EYES AT ALL. NO AMOUNT INTERACTION WILL MOVE THEM TO A PLACE WHERE THEY CAN REMEMBER - IN FEELING THE THOUSANDS OF LIFETIMES YOU HAVE ALREADY SPENT TOGETHER, EACH TIME CHOOSING WHATEVER FORM WOULD KEEP YOU CLOSEST LIKE OTTERS HOLDING HANDS IN A TUMULTUOUS RIVER. YOU WERE BIRDS, YOU WERE TREES WITH ROOTS ENTWINED, DRINKING IN THE SUNLIGHT TOGETHER. WHEREVER WE GO NEXT, WHATEVER YOU CHOOSE, I WILL ALWAYS BE RIGHT THERE WITH YOU. -
THATS DONE BUDDY, CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE CHOSEN BILL INSTEAD.
MCDONALDS RESERVES THE RIGHT TO PUT A GIANT YELLOW M ON YOUR TORSO AND FOREHEAD AND SEND YOU WALKING THROUGH A CROWDED TIMES SQUARE WHILE YOU SCREAM “THE FRIES, THE FRIES, THEY DON'T DEGRADE IN NATURE… ITS AN IMMORTAL FOOD… THEY WILL BE IN THE LANDFILLS LONG PAST OUR DEATHS.”
GOOD GOD, THE THINGS S I’VE SEEN, ME. WHO AM I? OH BILL'S PREVIOUS LAWYER, HE PUT MY SOUL INTO A QUILL PEN SO I CAN WRITE HIS LEGAL DOCUMENTS UNTIL THE SUN SNUFFS OUT LIKE A CANDLE IN THIS SICK UNIVERSE. I USED TO BE SO HOT. I WAS SO FINE. NOW I'M FINE PRINT.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, BILL RESERVES THE RIGHT TO PUT YOUR SOUL INTO AN INANIMATE OBJECT, A STRANGE CREATURE, A CONCEPT, A SENTENCE, A TASTEFUL BUT RUSTIC MASON JAR WITH WILDFLOWERS IN IT.
IF AT ANY POINT YOU WISH TO HAVE VISITATION RIGHTS WITH YOUR SOUL YOU WILL BE SWIFTLY DENIED UNLESS YOU HAD A COOL DAY PLANNED FOR THE BOTH OF YOU, THEN BILL MIGHT COME ALONG.
BY SIGNING THIS DOCUMENT YOU FORFEIT ANY RIGHTS TO EATING SOUL FOOD, IT WILL TURN TO ASH IN YOUR MOUTH, A FITTING PUNISHMENT FOR A FOOL WHO SQUANDERED THE ONLY TRUE GIFT LIFE OWES YOU.
BILL RESERVES THE RIGHT TO DRESS YOUR SOUL HOWEVER HE DEEMS NECESSARY, ESPECIALLY IF YOUR SOUL WAS A NERD BEFORE ACQUISITION, SOUL MAKEOVERRR!
YOUR SOUL MAY BECOME FRACTURED AND PLACED INTO DIFFERENT OBJECTS. THIS HAS NO PURPOSE AND WILL NOT RESURRECT YOU WHEN YOU DIE.
SIGNEE HAS FORFEITED ALL RIGHTS OF ANY AFTERLIFE INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO: HEAVEN, HELL, PURGATORY, BIG CORNER, FLOW STATE, THE DREAM HOUSE, THE REINCARNATION PROCESSING CENTER, AXOLOTL'S TANK AND CONSEQUENCES HOLE.
SIGNEE CAN NO LONGER BOARD THE SOUL TRAIN AND IS ADVISED TO DISCARD ALL BELLBOTTOMS.
SIGNEE CAN NO LONGER HAVE A PUPPY AS A BEST FRIEND, THEY CAN SENSE WHAT IS GONE. CATS ARE INDIFFERENT.
SIGNEE MAY EXPERIENCE OCCASIONAL DEMON POSSESSION FROM HORCULUS THE RED, PLABOS THE MERCILESS, MORBUS SON OF MORTEM, PLAGA THE OOZING AND OTHER SUCH COMMON DEMONS ROAMING EARTH SEARCHING FOR WEAKENED/EMPTY VESSELS.
TIPS FOR RIPPING YOUR SOUL OUT: WATCHING YOUTUBE COMMENTARY CHANNELS, ATTENDING AN EXTENDED FAMILY EVENT WITH AN OPEN BAR, USING GENERATIVE AI AND ASSERTING THAT YOU ARE CREATIVE, TURNING A BLIND EYE TO HUMAN SUFFERING, AMASSING MORE WEALTH THAN NEEDED, PURCHASING A BLUE CHECKMARK.
#gravity falls#this is not a website dot com#thisisnotawebsitedotcom#bill cipher#the book of bill#cryptography#i like how it just turns into alex ranting near the end brennan lee mulligan style#also “i was fine. now i'm fine print.” took me out#also 21 grams experiment mentioned??#lmk if theres any mistakes the lines bled together when reading a lot
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I started a comic that I might be able to finish either today or tomorrow but for now have this marker doodle from like a week or so ago cuz I thought it would be funny
The beetroot was lowkey fun to draw actually. I don’t draw like food items very often if ever and this was kinda fun
Narinder’s complaining about something
Also hopefully I can finish that comic cuz I’m excited about it
#cult of the lamb#cult of the lamb fanart#cotl#cotl fanart#cotl narinder#cotl lamb#narilamb#again idk if this would count as ship art or whatever but it’s mostly for anyone who wants to filter it out or anything#and here we have a marker doodle that bled through my sketchbook paper lol#the yet untitled qpr narilamb au
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Rin, chapter 2: “what kind of evil jerk do you think I am!? I would never even slap my brother.”
Yukio, (morally superior) chapter 2: “Kill yourself.” *cocks gun*
#blue exorcist#rin okumura#yukio okumura#he just says the most hurtful things he can think of and smiles at Rin#because he’s a jealous arse#‘the world would be a better place if you bled out in a ditch surrounded by nothing but your worst thoughts’#…is what you’ll hear if you become an exorcist so you should really be prepared to hear that :)
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