#black eyed Percy de rolo

[smoky-de-rolo]

Scanlan: “Wait, where’s Percy?”

They see a flap of a coat turning down the corner

Archie: “Percy, wait!”

Vax: “We’ll get him.”

Vex: “The rest of you hold this hallway. Hurry, brother!”

Vax, Archie, and Scanlan run after Percy.

-

Stonefell chuckles to himself as he walks past a row of cells, hunting any lingering rebels.

Percy is on the other side, the glare on his glasses hiding his eyes. As he passes behind a wall, his beaked mask now covers his face.

Stonefell finds a lonesome man. He laughs as his hammer smashes his skull like a watermelon.

Percy enters the hallway. The smoke is exuding from every part of his coat and raises to the ceiling. He cocks the List and points it at Stonefell from twenty feet down the way.

“Hm, what are you supposed to be, freak?”

“I am vengeance for the de Rolos.”

Stonefell laughs. “The de Rolos? Now that takes me back. Some folks you kill ‘cause you’re ordered to. Them I killed ‘cause I wanted to.”

The engraving of CAPT. STONEFELL shines in the dim light of the prison, even through the smoke that is seemingly being released from the metal.

“Let me say, you were the one I was least looking forward to.”

“Fuck off!”

Stonefell hefts his hammer and runs towards Percy with a shout.

A bullet shoots from the List, Percy’s hand steady through the recoil.

Stonefell reflexively shields himself with his free arm and laughs when he is seemingly unharmed. He lifts his hammer back up only to see it has been shot clean off its handle.

“Huh? Huh?”

The beaked mask stares at him unflinchingly.

Another shot.

The flash lights up the hallway as Stonefell is thrown backwards. He futilely covers the bleeding hole in his chest and looks up at the soulless mask in fear.

Percy slowly walks up to the gurgling man on the floor. He removes the mask and looks down at him.

“I wanted you to know it was me.”

His face is twisted into a sneer. His eyes are black, save for the orange centers glowing like coal.

The smoke envelopes Percy and Stonefell.

“Huh? Percy?”

Another shot.

Stonefell’s left arm is blown away from his body.

Another shot.

His right hand explodes, not unlike the driver of the Briarwoods.

Three more shots.

Blood splatters Percy’s rage-filled face.

The smoke is thicker than ever. The engraving of Stonefell’s name burns away in an orange light.

[waltwhitmansbeard]

ok the gentle care list… perc’ahlia and “oh…oh we’re hugging about this okay”

"Oh - okay - we're hugging about this, okay."

Percy's hungry. It's his own damn fault; one day, he'll remember to bring food with him before locking himself in his workshop all night, but, alas, today is not that day. He'd never dream of waking Laina at this hour, so he emerges from his den, bleary-eyed and ready to fend for himself.

The halls of Greyskull Keep are barely lit, just some candles in sconces every ten yards or so, so it's slow going. He's ravenous by the time he reaches the kitchen, which is pitch black. Cursing himself for leaving his lantern in his room, he fumbles around, sure that Laina keeps a book of matches somewhere nearby to light the stove, if only he could—

"Percy?"

He lets out a rather undignified yelp, sending something clattering to the floor. A few moments later, a candle flickers to life, and there is Vex, in her nightdress, looking at him and the knocked-over dinner at his feet with an one eyebrow raised.

He grins, embarrassed. "Ah. Yes. Hello."

"Hello, darling." Her words are light, but there's something off about her tone. "Did you need something?"

He can tell he's interrupted something; he just doesn't know what. "Feeling a bit peckish."

"Mm, yes, you missed dinner. Again." But there's no animosity in it, just general acknowledgement. "Well, I've made myself a little spread, if you'd like to join me." She gestures to the kitchen island between them, which is cluttered with a few cheeses, some strawberries Percy knows to come from Keyleth's garden, and a half-drunk glass of red wine.

"Oh, a midnight snacker after my own heart." He comes around the island to start picking at the makeshift charcuterie board. "So what as you up at this hour? I'm a workaholic, but usually you're rather insistent upon your beauty sleep."

She sticks her tongue out at him, then pops a cube of cheese into her mouth. "Just...couldn't sleep." She shrugs. "It happens sometimes."

He's well familiar with that, isn't he? "Lots of ghosts in the night, aren't there?"

She hums in agreement. There is a minute of silence between them, marred only by small sounds of chewing, and then she asks, "Did you like your father?"

He almost swallows a strawberry whole. "I—sorry—" He finishes hacking before he continues. "Did I what?"

"Your father. Did you like him?" She sips from her glass nonchalantly.

Percy blinks. "I—well—hmm." This was not a question he'd contemplated in a very long time. "He was a complicated man, my father. Not very affectionate, stubborn as a goat, more children than frankly he knew what to do with." Vex laughs at that. "But...I never thought he didn't love us. Me. You always knew where you stood with my father. If he was pleased, he showed it. If he was cross, you knew why." Percy pauses. "To be honest, I'm not sure I knew the man well enough to know if I liked him. He died before I got the chance to understand him as someone other than my father."

"I see." Vex swirls the wine in her glass round and round and round. "My father is an incomparable prick incapable of love."

Percy has no idea what to say to that. He just stares at her, slack-jawed, as she calmly finished her wine and sets her glass down on the island. Then, in the most shocking move yet, she throws her arms around him, burying her face in his chest. He catches her automatically, his hands splaying on her back. "Oh—okay—we're hugging about this, okay."

The de Rolos were never huggers. Too saccharine. Too vulnerable. But the twins were raised differently, he's aware; Vax is always touching somebody, and Vex's first instinct when she's tired or bored or yearning to be anywhere else than where she is is to tip her head onto her brother's shoulder. And that's probably what this is—in lieu of Vax, Percy is Vex's available option when in need of comfort.

So he rests his chin atop her head, feels her shake with sobs, with rage, with careful control, who knows. "You know, your father may not be much use as a father, but that doesn't mean he can't be useful."

"What?" Vex muffles flatly into his shirt.

"Well I, for one, find few things as personally motivating as spite."

Vex tips her head up to frown at him. Her eyes are warm and deep in the candlelight. There's a long silence, and Percy's worried he's stepped in it, but then she snorts out a laugh as her face melts. "You're not wrong, darling." She steps back, and for half a heartbeat, Percy considers not letting her. "A great number of my actions have been motivated by spite, for better or for worse. It can be satisfying, can't it?"

"Undoubtedly so." He doesn't reach up to tuck a loose strand of her hair behind her ear, because to do so would be insane. "Are we feeling better?"

Vex smiles. "A little food, a little wine, a little company...yes, I think so." She rocks up onto her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. "Goodnight, Percy."

And then she is gone, and Percy is alone with the cheese and the strawberries and the feeling of her lips on his face, a lingering warmth in this drafty kitchen. He stands there, unmoving, unblinking, until the candle burns low, until the chill of her absence forces his body toward bed, toward dreams he is not yet ready to understand.

[multiverseanimecrossover]

Percy Meets Aki (TLOVM x Chainsaw Man)

Percy de Rolo's world went dark as he felt himself being pulled through a swirling vortex. He tried to reach out to his friends, but their voices were muffled and distant. When his vision cleared, he found himself standing alone in an unfamiliar landscape. The skies above were a sickly shade of yellow, and the air reeked of smoke and ash.

Percy's hand instinctively went to his sword, but it was nowhere to be found. His elegant attire was replaced with a simple tunic and pants, and his usually immaculate hair was disheveled. He looked around, taking in the desolate landscape. Ruins of buildings stretched towards the horizon, and the only signs of life were the twisted, blackened trees that seemed to writhe in the flickering wind.

As he walked through the barren landscape, Percy spotted a figure in the distance. The young man had spiky black hair and piercing green eyes, and he wore a black uniform adorned with strange symbols. Aki Hayakawa, a member of the Public Safety Devil Extermination Squad, eyed Percy with a mix of curiosity and suspicion.

"What are you doing here?" Aki asked gruffly, his hand resting on the hilt of his sword.

Percy's eyes narrowed. "I might ask you the same thing. Where is here, exactly?"

Aki snorted. "You don't know? You're not from around here, that's for sure. This is my world."

Percy's gaze intensified. "I am Percy de Rolo, a member of Vox Machina. And I will find a way back to my friends."

Aki raised an eyebrow. "Vox Machina? Never heard of them. But you're not going anywhere until I figure out what you're doing here."

The air was electric with tension as the two young men faced off, their eyes locked in a silent challenge. The fate of their encounter hung in the balance, as the unfamiliar skies loomed above them like a warning.

[k11eth]

Percildan Spark Of Rebellion ~Smut~

As black smoke surrounded Percy his rage inside began to fill as he stepped closer to his victim who's name was now plastered on his rifle, he put on his mask appearing behind Stonefell he pointed his gun towards the man getting his attention "what are you supposed to be freak" without hesitation Percy answered with anger filled in his lungs at the man before him "I am vengeance for the De Rolo's" with that sentence the purple skinned man laughed a hearty laugh before saying "the De Rolo's, now that takes me back. Some folks you kill cause you're ordered to, them... I killed them cause I wanted to" a smirk found it's way onto the mans face having the anger in Percy rise having him raise his gun and the smoke move along his motion "let me say you were the one I was least looking forward to" Stonefell raised his weapon as well continuing with a "fuck off" charging at Percy with a battle cry. With one bullet fired Stonefell stopped, checking himself but seeing that Percy missed (or so he thought with his dumbass) he laughed and raised his weapon ready to charge once again but when he did the hammer top was gone and his face went pale (if that even is possible) he looked confused "huh" he said but then again another bullet came but this time it hit him in the chest having him fall back, Percy lowed his gun walking towards him while taking off his mask before saying "I want you to know it was me" his eyes have turned black leaving his pupils orange but his face expression only showed rage "huh, Percy" but just as he said his name the white haired man fired another bullet blowing the mans right arm off yet he still showed no other emotion than anger when doing so then Percy shot again having him only hear the man on the ground gag from the blood leaving him Percy then shot a few more times having Stonefell's blood splatter across his face. When he lifted his gun the name Capt. Stonefell disappeared "PERCIVAL" Vax shouted and with a quick motion Percy turned pointing the gun at him giving the man fright for a second "what the fuck are you doing, running off risking this entire mission, you point that thing at me and for what" he said slapping the gun out of his face now with anger showing Percy began heavily breathing "FOR WHAT!!, Stonefell helped slaughter them and laughed while it happened" he paused stepping closer to Vax having him step back in fear but didn't show it, he has never seen Percy like this and it scared him the first time this happened was back in Tal'Dorei where he blew the server of the Briarwoods arm off "I am the soul surviving De Rolo, I WILL HAVE MY VENGEANCE AND NO ONE WILL STAND IN MY WAY!!" and just as Vax was about to argue back Archi butted in "Percival you aren't the last De Rolo" Percy looked at the man confused "what" Archi continued "your sister Cassandra, she lives" Vax looked From Archibald to Percy wide eyed and the winter haired man looked at him his eyes widened. Running back Scanlan said "sorry we're late we had a thing" Vex shot two arrows having them fly into two guards necks "grog throw the ale" the giant dropped his axe looking toward the woman with puppy eyes "but I just got it" he whined (god he is my favorite) holding the barrel for dear life "just do it" he looked from the million guards surrounding their exit to the alcohol but threw it with a grunt and with one flaming arrow it exploded leaving the guards in flames.

Looking at the building in flames Percy said to himself "I have a sister" he smiles with the thought of her then turned around to catch up with the group. Getting slammed down into a chair by a very angry Vax'ildan "are fucking serious Percy you run off and go murder some asshole, then decide to point that gun at me" his twin sister sighed resting a hand on his shoulder "brother calm down" the angered man removed her hand turning back to Percy grabbing onto his collar "if you ever do that again and without hesitation I will kill you" Vax let go of his collar leaning his back on the wall trying to calm himself down "everyone get out for a moment" Percival says setting his weapon down taking off his jacket leaving it on the chair he also took of his glasses, as everyone left the room except Vax they stood there in silence until Percy spoke very sternly "well if you have the voice to say that then I'm sure this won't be a problem answering so I do ask" the wintered haired man paused stepping closer to Vax slowly removing his cape lifting his head to face him "permission" the raven haired man looked away trying to hide his desires that the man before him brought "I won't ask again Vax'ildan, permission" taking a shakey breath before he answered he removed the belts that held his shirt together off letting Percy remove his shirt leaving him topless he took of his pants finally answering "granted" just as that word left his mouth his hands were pinned above him and he was being kissed aggressively, letting out a little moan Percy moved down his neck kissing his chest back up to his lips, Vax helped take off Percy's shirt kissing down his chest moving down to his pants taking them off. Surprised by his length Vax opened his mouth and Percy roughly thrusted his hard member into the raven haired man's mouth causing his head to hit the wall "yeah that's it take every inch, you hungry little slut" Percy leaned his head back in pleasure as he began to move. Vax moaned with every thrust he had to take coming close to his release 'he's gonna stretch my throat' Vax thought trying not to faint from the man's size, as Percy continued to thrust into his mouth Vax was getting close but Percy pulled out "bend over the table and spread your legs" Vax did as he was told ready for the sensation he was about to feel, Percy wrapped a leash around Vax's neck which had a chain instead of leather rope from before he could tug on and with one thrust Vax gasped having pleasure take over his entire body "say it" the man took a breath trying to form a sentence "p-please~" he whined gripping onto the table "please what" Percy replied with a smirk sliding his hand down his back to his hips "please f-fuck me~, f-fuck your hungry little s-slut~" having a full on grin appear on Percy's face he began to move getting small moans leave Vax'ildan "louder, I want to hear you scream my name" picking up his pace Percy was being a little more rough tugging on the chain having Vax face him, the raven haired man had his eyes rolled back and his mouth wide open with his tongue hanging out "you're wrapping around me so tightly" Percy was now pounding into Vax having him moan out his name, loving every thrust wanting him to never stop "PERCIVAL!!" Vax screamed as the wintered haired man released inside of Vax. Pulling out to catch his breath Percy smiled at his work grabbing his lover he turned him around so he could face him "done already" Vax breathed out with a smirk but it faded when black smoke surrounded him and Percy's body and his eyes changed color "you don't know what I have in store for you my love" Percy kissed his forehead picking him up frightening Vax

"Ugh fuck me"

[wild-karrde]

Banished

A/N: HI HELLO AND WELCOME TO THIS ABSOLUTELY CRACK CROSSOVER FIC. I wrote this in honor of my beloved beta-reader @teletraan-meets-jarvis whose birthday is today (well...tomorrow for me, but it's her birthday where she's at, so HAPPY BIRTHDAY TJ!) Over the last year, we have bonded over our mutual loves of all things nerdy, including The Bad Batch and The Legend of Vox Machina, so I find it only fitting that this birthday gift fic include both of those things.

TJ - I hope you have the absolute happiest of birthdays and I am so grateful for your friendship! I also hope this absolute mess of a fic brings you joy and makes you smile at a minimum. HAVE AN EXCELLENT ONE!!!

Rating - M (langauge... because it wouldn't be The Legend of Vox Machina without multiple uses of the word f**k)

There was a roaring in his ears and then deafening silence just before he fell half a meter onto his face. The surface that he was lying on was cool, metallic, and above all, hard. 

Fucking Scanlan and his banishment spells.

Percy’s head swam as he tried to pry his eyes open without retching violently. He’d never been able to get used to being banished via enchantment, and he always had a lousy time recovering. It seemed that this instance would be no different. He managed to rise to his hands and knees, groaning loudly. 

“Who the kriff are you?” 

He froze at the sound of a deep baritone before feeling cool metal on the back of his neck. He’d handled enough weapons in his time to know it was some sort of gun pressing against the base of his skull.  

I thought this was supposed to be a safe plane of existence. When I get my hands on that fucking gnome…

The weapon pressed more insistently against his skin. “Do you speak Basic?” 

“I speak Common, which it would seem you do as well,” Percy muttered. “Would you mind letting me at least stand up?” 

A large hand gripped him by the back of his coat, yanking him to his feet and then slightly off of them, leaving his toes dangling against the floor uselessly. Percy’s eyes widened immeasurably behind his spectacles as he took in the sight before him. 

He was in some sort of metallic room, the walls lined with various storage compartments and a handful of uncomfortable looking pull-down bunks. There was an unusual rumbling hum coming from beneath the metal deck below his boots, and peering forward, he could see a large window with what appeared to be darkness beyond it. No, not darkness…a night sky. Nothing but stars and black. A tingle ran up his spine. 

Standing in front of him were four men wearing some type of non-metallic armor. There was one with a skull tattooed on half of his face and a red bandana tied around his head, one with a pair of goggles in red and white armor, one with a deathly pallor and metal wrapping around his head, and a grey-haired one that appeared to be leveling some sort of rifle at him. He assumed that was the gun he’d felt on the back of his neck. Looking over his shoulder, he took in the scarred face of a fifth man, who was not much smaller than Grog, dangling him by his coat collar just an inch or so off the floor. 

“Unhand me!” he demanded, wriggling in the large man’s grip. The man with the metal wrapping around his head stepped forward, leveling a strange looking pistol at Percy’s head as he plucked Bad News from his grasp. 

“You can put him down now, Wrecker,” the one with the bandana conceded, and Percy heard the large man behind him grunt begrudgingly before he lowered Percy’s boots back to the deck. Percy turned and glared at the one called Wrecker as he straightened his coat before pausing, glancing between the faces all again. 

They’re clearly soldiers and also… eerily similar. Siblings perhaps. 

“I’m gonna ask again. Who are you?” the one with the bandana demanded. 

“Percival Fredrickstein von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III,” Percy sneered with more confidence than he felt. He eyed Bad News dangling from the pale man’s hand, and the man’s grip tightened. His sharp eyes flicked back to the skull tattooed one. Clearly the leader. “And who might you be?” 

The tattooed one smirked. “You want to tell me how you got here, Percival?”

Evasive. Fine.

Percy snorted. “I was banished here, if you must know, although I doubt this is what Scanlan had planned when he cast the spell.”

“Spell?” The goggled one stepped forward, readjusting his eyewear. “Certainly you can’t be implying you used magic to board our ship?” 

“Ship? What kind of vessel is this?” 

“We still have more questions, Percival.” 

Percy felt his patience getting shorter. “Yes, well so do I. I didn’t exactly plan on intruding, so the least you could do is stop pointing your weapons at me. You’ve unarmed me already as it is.” 

The others looked to the one with the bandana and skull tattoo, all but confirming Percy’s suspicions as to who was in charge, and he shrugged. “Fine, but you’re still going to explain how you got here.” 

Percy huffed. “I already told you. It was a banishment enchantment. I’ll only be here as long as Scanlan can keep his concentration, which if history is any indication, should be a relatively short amount of time. I’d appreciate it if you would return my rifle to me before then so that I can take it with me when I return to my plane.” He glared at the pale man, who was still watching him carefully. The thin one, who he now noted sported a crosshair tattoo over his right eye was looking over the pale one’s shoulder at Bad News. 

“What sort of rifle is it?” he asked, flicking a toothpick between his teeth. 

“What?” Percy asked, genuinely confused. 

The thin one rolled his eyes before taking Bad News from his compatriot, setting his own weapon against the wall. He rested the rifle against his shoulder, peering through the scopes. Percy felt his teeth grind in annoyance, his fists clenching. 

“This is a combustion weapon?” the thin one asked. 

“Of course. Have you never seen a gun before?” Percy snapped. His outburst didn’t appear to phase the soldier much as he flicked his toothpick to the other side of his mouth before glancing over at Percy.

“How uncivilized,” he sneered.

“I’d argue primitive,” countered the goggled one. 

“How dare you.” Percy lunged forward to retrieve his weapon, but found himself face to face with the strange pistol again. “If it’s so primitive, then you should have no problem in returning it to me,” he growled. 

The thin one shrugged. “Stand down, Echo. We’d all be able to kill him about six times over before he even got it loaded.” He tossed Bad News back to Percy, who managed to catch it with a minimal amount of fumbling. 

The pale one, presumably Echo, continued to glare at Percy as he reholstered his weapon. “You still haven’t really explained how you got here.”

“Yes I have. It was a spell.”

“Magic isn’t real,” the goggled one replied. 

“Did he hit his head when he landed?” Wrecker asked. 

“Seven times over then,” the thin one chortled. 

Wrecker laughed, slapping him on the shoulder. “Maybe you two should have a shootout, Crosshair.” 

Percy whipped his head around to look at the sniper. “Crosshair? Really? How original.”

“We can’t all be Lord of the Castle,” the sniper drawled back, bowing mockingly. 

“At least you can recognize a title when you hear one,” Percy muttered, straightening his jacket. 

“You’ll have to excuse us if we don’t curtsy,” the leader joked, crossing his arms over his chest plate. “You are still an intruder after all, even if your weapon is… inefficient.” 

Percy inspected the rifle, readjusting it slightly. “It gets the job done just fine.” 

Crosshair chuckled mockingly, but the goggled one was leaning forward, adjusting his eyewear again as he inspected Percy’s gun. “The alloy used for the barrell is… unusual. What did the maker select for it?”

“I’m the maker, and it’s a custom composition. The first few iterations were prone to blowing apart after only a shot or two, and I found that this kept the mechanisms from overheating, which typically led to the combustion issue. In addition, this particular alloy is more durable, so in the event that it experiences such an… anomaly, it’s less likely to become a source of shrapnel.” 

“I see,” the goggled one responded. “How interesting.”

“Figures Tech would find all this interesting,” Wrecker joked, slapping the goggled one roughly on the back and earning himself an eye roll. 

“What sort of range do you have with it?” Crosshair asked. 

Percy couldn’t help the slight flush of pride he felt erupting in his chest at the questions. It tickled his ego and undoubtedly softened him towards these strangers, at least for the moment. “I haven’t had time to fully test its range yet, but I’d estimate it can hit a shot up to and perhaps exceeding a kilometer.” 

That seemed to impress Crosshair less. He huffed at that, which caused Percy’s annoyance to flare once more. “That’s because of your ammunition,” the marksman commented snidely. “Lead ammunition is severely limited in its range.” 

Percy was becoming more exasperated. “And what sort of ammo would you suggest then?”

“Plasma of course.” 

“Plasma?”

“Yes. Is that so shocking, my lord?”

“It is.”

The leader waved his hand dismissively. “As much as I hate to interrupt this bonding moment, we still haven’t established what you’re doing here, Percival.” 

“Hunter, he’s clearly delirious if he thinks he was transported here via magic,” the one named Echo stated. 

“That or he’s just a fantastic liar.”

“I told you, it’s a spell.”

“And we told you there’s no such thing as magic.”

“Of course there is. Don’t be ridiculous.” 

Hunter smirked. “Alright then, if you’ve got magical abilities, please, demonstrate for us.”

Percy slipped Bad News onto his back, glowering at the five of them as they assembled in front of him, watching him expectantly. 

Can’t hex them. That won’t bode well in terms of convincing them I’m not a threat. A minor illusion should do the trick though. 

Inhaling deeply, Percy concentrated on Wrecker and how he looked, doing his best to emulate the largest of the soldiers, furrowing his brow as he muttered the incantation and flexing his fingers. After a few moments, he opened his eyes again. However, where he’d expected to see looks of awe and wonder, he found them all still staring at him, unimpressed as ever. Crosshair snorted. 

“He’s been hitting the spice too hard.” 

Percy stared down at his unchanged form. “I… I don’t understand. It must be something to do with this plane. I’ve never had difficulty casting before.” 

Hunter chuckled. “It’s fine Percival. We’ll be leaving for Coruscant shortly and should be there in a few hours. We’ll drop you off at the main port. Surely you can find your way home from there.” 

“Can you at least tell me where that is in relation to Westruun? Or are we even on the continent of Tal Dorei?” 

They stared at him blankly. Tech recovered and replied first. “We have never heard of either of those places. Can you tell us what sector they are in, or better yet what planet they reside on?”

“PLANET?” Percy suddenly felt queasy, and this time, he was unsure if it was a hangover from Scanlan’s spell or the fact that he just realized that he wasn’t just looking at the night sky out the front of this vehicle; he was in the night sky. 

Space travel. Remarkable. Unfeasible? And yet…

Tech and Hunter were swapping concerned looks. “Perhaps you should check him out medically,” Hunter murmured. “He seems like he’s had a very serious head trauma. Might need to sedate him.” 

“I’ve got it,” Wrecker said, grinning menacingly as he unholstered his blaster, clicking something on it. “Hold still now. This won’t hurt a bit.” He leveled the weapon at Percy. 

Hunter’s eyes widened. “WRECKER NO! We have meds for that! He-”

Before Hunter could utter another word, Percy pulled Bad News off his back, swinging it as hard as he could and bringing it down on the weapon that was pointed at him. Wrecker swore loudly as the pistol clattered to the floor. Percy lunged for it, managing to grab it and roll away, clutching both weapons to his chest. Just then, the hairs on the back of his neck stood up, and the small space began to feel as though it was suddenly electrically charged. 

Shit. I guess I can’t complain about his timing this once.

Purple sparks erupted into a ring around Percy, and the five soldiers leapt away from him. He smirked. “Well, I wish I could say it’s been a pleasure gentlemen, but-” 

Percy disappeared into the portal before he could complete his mocking farewell. The ring of purple sparks and energy immediately winked out of existence. Tech stepped forward after a few seconds, scanning the area. “It would appear that he’s gone.”

“Thank you for that astute observation,” Crosshair muttered.

“Maybe he wasn’t lying about the magic,” Wrecker said, his voice filled with awe as his jaw hung open.

“You might be right,” Echo agreed. 

Hunter had recovered slightly. “Alright. Enough. I don’t want to have to fill out a report about this because I have no kriffing idea where I’d even start, so let’s all just agree that this never happened and get back to Coruscant. Understand?”

His four subordinates nodded at him, and he muttered under his breath as he returned to the cockpit. 

“And I thought the Jedi were strange…”

—

Percy didn’t manage to keep himself from vomiting this time. He missed Scanlan’s boots by mere inches as the gnome danced away from the ejecting bile that was covering the city cobblestones. “Is that all the thanks I get for keeping you safe? Next time remind me to just leave you wherever you got sent to.” 

Percy spat to clear his mouth as Vex offered him a flask. Her expression was somewhere between sympathetic and revolted as he rinsed his mouth out and spat again before launching into a tirade, waving the flask at the gnome threateningly.

“Now listen here, you pompous little ingrate, if you want to be a smartass, I’ll just let the next person you piss off in a tavern take you outside and give you what you deserve.” He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, pushing himself to a standing position as he handed Vex back the flask. 

“What’s that?” Pike asked quietly, pointing at Percy’s feet. Percy glanced down, noting the pistol he’d grabbed from Wrecker’s hands had come with him through the portal. “One of the weapons my latest acquaintances was carrying.” 

“Acquaintances?” Vex asked. 

“Weapon?” Keyleth asked simultaneously. 

Before anyone could stop him, Scanlan picked up the blaster, inspecting it meticulously. “Where do the bullets go?”

“Scanlan, what makes you think that’s a good idea? You haven’t the faintest idea how to fire a gun,” Vax teased. Scanlan stuck his tongue out at him. 

“They don’t use bullets. At least that’s what they claim,” Percy replied, unable to suppress a slight smile at Vax’s mockery. 

“Don’t use bullets? Then what kind of gun-” Scanlan squeezed the trigger on accident, sending a volley of blue energy rings erupting from the muzzle. The rings struck Vax in the chest, and he went stiff before collapsing backwards onto the ground with a resounding thud. Pike and Keyleth raced over to him, falling to their knees next to his twitching form. 

“He… he’s just unconscious,” Pike sighed with relief. She clutched her holy symbol, pressing her other hand to Vax’s chest and murmuring a healing incantation. The half-elf’s eyes fluttered open, and a trail of drool leaked from the corner of his mouth. 

“Wha da fook was tha?” he asked, his tongue lolling in his mouth as his eyes seemed to struggle to focus. 

“MY TURN NEXT!” Grog roared, charging forward to try and take the weapon from Scanlan. 

“ABSOLUTELY NOT! If there’s one thing we’ve learned, it's that strange weapons that Percy brings back from unknown places are bad,” Scanlan stated, stepping out of reach of Grog. “Besides, I don’t want this to be around when Vax fully comes to. For reasons.” Glancing around, he grinned as he noted the river at the end of the avenue they were congregated on. Before anyone could stop him, he took off sprinting towards it, winding up and heaving the strange weapon into the river. 

Percy gripped his hair, grinding his teeth in annoyance. “I wanted to study that!” 

Vex placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. “It’s probably for the best, dear.”

Percy scrubbed his fingers across his face, rubbing under his spectacles in frustration for a few more moments. “I suppose you’re right. But still… fucking Scanlan.”

A/N: The original title of this fic was "Fucking Scanlan" but I realized that could have multiple meanings (many of which align perfectly with Mr. Shorthalt's character)... so. "Banished" it is.

Tag List (I apologize if this is spammy and not of interest at all, but I went with TBB sign-ups just in case): @seriowan @partoftheeternalsoul @rosmariner @misogirl828 @ellichonkasaurusrex @zoeykallus @gjrain20-starwars @rain-on-kamino

[dalishthunder]

The Right Tool for the Job

Chapter 1/?

Rating: Teen (eventually Mature) Pairing: Percy de Rolo/Artificer!Reader (gender neutral) Words: 1582

A/N: i am percy trash slumming it in derolotown so have the beginnings of a long slowburn fanfic. Just a note that the Reader is a non-standard teifling (aka no horns or purple skin, just some other whacky stuff like double shadows and glows under a blacklight) with a virtue name- true name is not provided so feel free to choose your own

( •̀ ω •́ )✧

The air smelled of burnt hair and ozone as you hurriedly threw the smoking mold into a bucket of water, steam flooding your lab until you opened up a window for it to pour out of. Forlornly you surveyed your poor arms which were now slightly singed and bereft of hair.

Okay. So maybe you were a bit off on combining powdered residuum with ruby dust to try crafting a more powerful spell storing ring. You were so sure you had it this time.

You slathered your arms in an aloe balm, watching the redness gradually fade. The schematics and calculations on the wall mocking you. If you could just-

The bell at the shop entrance was the first thing to alert you to the presence of customers. Paying customers. People who would pay you for your goods and services. Gods knew you needed it with how much money you had just set on fire.

There was the murmur of a quiet conversation, "Truly, what would I do without your hovering."

"Oh quit whining. Just follow my lead, darling."

But quiet fell over the room as soon as you scuttled in from your lab.

"Welcome to Windfall Wonders! What can I do you for?" You wiped off some grease on your smock, looking up at two of the most attractive people you had ever seen. A woman in blue, furred armor with a blue feather in her hair, a half elf by the looks of her; And a human man with snow white hair wearing dark attire. A couple of adventurers.

Adventurers meant coin.

"Hello, darling, what a lovely shop you have here." Her voice flowed like a smooth wine. "I can't believe we've never been in here before. Have you been here long?" She gave you a disarming smile as her eyes caught on the set of arrows behind you.

You smiled back, very aware you were probably looking at a haggler. No one was that conversational with a shopkeep that they'd just met unless they wanted something. But you were well acquainted with this game. "I've been operating out of this location for a year and a half."

In truth, the building had belonged to your great grandfather, and you had inherited it when he had passed away not too long ago. It had been a general store when he had been spry enough to run it, but it was almost perfect to set up your lab and wondrous item shop.

Her eyes widened in interest, and she leaned forward. "Marvelous, and did you make all of these yourself?"

"Indeed." With that, you couldn't help the genuine smile that crept along your face. "I hope I can help you find what you're looking for."

"I'm looking for black powder. Five hundred grams." The man spoke this time, staring at you with an impassive expression.

She gave him a dry look.

You blinked, "I have a powder horn that I suppose I could sell you. I was going to use it to make some pyrotechnics. Are you sure you would just prefer the powder itself?"

"Yes, I am quite sure." He nodded.

"Alright then, I'll just be a moment." You turned to hurry back to your lab and grab the water-tight horn to bring out to him. "What will you be using this for, if I may ask? Just out of curiosity."

"Projectiles."

Despite his standoffishness, you couldn't help but be intrigued. That was interesting. "Oh? What sort of projectiles?" You took a moment to take him in, noting a strange contraption at his hip. "Is it for that?"

Setting the powder horn on the counter, you leaned in a bit.

"Go on, Percy. Show off your clever little pepperbox." The woman nudged him, "He's a bit of a tinkerer himself."

Percy seemed to perk up a bit at that, but eyed you warily. "It's quite interesting, really. It uses black powder- "

"As a concussive force to propel it forward? How large are these projectiles? If it's coming out of that device, not large I'd imagine. But at such high speeds, I suppose size wouldn't really matter." You chuckled to yourself at your joke. "How do you get them to fly straight?"

He blinked.

You'd interrupted him. That was rude. You interrupted a customer who'd probably hate you and take his business elsewhere. You mumbled a hasty, "Sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt. Please continue."

"It's all in the shape and spin of the munitions, actually." He adjusted his glasses, taking his pepperbox off his hip and as you leaned in to inspect it, you caught the faintest whiff of brimstone. Perhaps a component in producing the concussive force.

You didn't dare touch it. He wasn't exactly holding it out for you, just showing you.

Steel barrels. Six of them on some sort of rotating pin with a trigger. It was unlike anything you'd ever seen. By the gods you wanted to dismantle it and put it back together again. Learn exactly how it operated. But you were good. You kept your fingers to yourself.

"And each of these barrels has a piece of ammunition in it? Does it rotate when you take a shot, or do you have to do that manually?"

"Manually, for now." He responded, the chilliness fading somewhat as he extended his empty hand toward you. "Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski De Rolo the Third-"

"You can call him Percy."

"-it's a rarity I meet anyone interested in the realm of ingenuity." You took his hand for a shake, and the woman clapped her own together.

"See? Quite the clever little tinkerer."

You had almost forgotten that the two of them had walked in together, so caught up in the realm of gadgetry you had been. You pulled back and flashed them both nervous smiles. Right. They were here to buy things, not talk shop.

And they looked well off. Probably had places to go and people to see.

"Yes, that is incredibly interesting." You fidgeted a bit. "You're probably both very busy people, so I don't want to take any more time than is needed. Will the powder horn be all?"

"Oh, think nothing of it, darling. We adore making new friends." She gave you a little wink, and you felt your cheeks immediately flush. "We're going to slay a dragon, you know."

Your eyes went wide.

"And since we're all such good friends, what would you say if we brought you back some parts? I'm sure someone as clever as you could find many uses for them. Scales for some of the finest scale mail around. Maybe some of the bellow sack where it generates it's electrical energy. What say you to such a proposition?" When she smiled, you couldn't help the way your heart fluttered. You? Worthy of dragon parts? Dragonscale mail.... That would put you up in Gilmore's tier. Maybe you wouldn't have to sell at such a discounted rate that you-

Wait. No.

She wanted something back from you. You couldn't afford dragon parts, and she probably realized this already.

"I would very much like some dragon parts." But it never hurt to dream a little.

"Then how about this for a deal? We provide you will all the dragon parts you would like, and you provide us with just this itty bitty bit of powder?"

You balked. "That horn is worth thirty eight gold pieces. What guarantee do I have that you'll return let alone bring me the parts I'd need?"

"I can assure you, we of Vox Machina are very good at killing things." She flashed you another easy smile as though that wasn't an incredibly ominous and mildly threatening thing to say to someone she was haggling with.

You sighed. "Look, I want to help you, but that's a lot of faith for me to put in someone I just met."

"When are you going to get the chance to have your own stock of dragon parts no questions asked? What's thirty eight measly gold pieces to genuine dragon scales? Really, you're the one coming away with a better deal." She really knew how to play you, didn't she.

Dragon parts were hundreds if not thousands of gold. A single red dragon scale could easily go for over seventy five gold... just a single one. You grimaced, "Fine."

"Why don't you just make us a list and we'll see what we can do for you?" You pursed your lips, pulling out a piece of paper and a quill and writing down exactly what you were looking for before handing it to them.

She took it graciously, "Alright, twenty dragon scales, the bellow sack mostly intact, one dragon's tooth, and five philters of dragon's blood. You drive a hard bargain. I can appreciate that." She threw you one last wink, the scraping sound of the horn against the wood grain of your counter sealing the deal.

Percy gave you a nod on the way out, "Thank you."

As they headed toward the door, you called out after them, "Wait! Who did I have the... pleasure of making this deal with today?"

"Vox Machina. Vex'ahlia." You watched them go, arms crossed, not being able to resist at least glancing at their powerful legs. What a handsome adventuring party... part of you idly wondered if they were an item. Their children would be stunning. "Darling, I promise you won't regret it."

And as the door shut behind them, you immediately regretted it.

[blorbologist]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!! I AM SO EXCITED FOR THESE PROMPTS

going off of vibes and vibes alone for all of these

vesper elaina de rolo- little stargazer

09. Little stargazer.

Dung beetles navigate using the stars and will actually get up on top of the dung ball to get a good look. A *beetle* looking up at the stars, climbing up to get a better look at them, and then reading the sky like a map. They’re such a shiny black - picture one with the stars reflected in its wing covers. Compound eyes must make the stars look something especially spectacular, too.

HC time: Given Vesper’s the firstborn, and without any parents around to advise them, I think Percy and Vex really tried everything to get their baby to calm down and go the fuck to sleep when she was being fussy.

I think, one night, Vex probably brought Vesper with her to get some fresh air - maybe to avoid waking Percy with the crying - maybe to just get away from the walls for a second - 

And Vesper just went quiet.

Percy finds them later sitting on the walls (some guards pretending not to watch from a respectful distance) with Vesper staring up at the moon wide-eyed and absolutely fucking entranced. Vex telling her all sorts of stories about it.

Once that baby eyesight improved, the focus shifted to the stars. Vex wheedled Percy for all the books on constellations and the night sky and legends contained therein they could field from Whitestone to Emon. And it remains the only consistent way to get this squalling little thing to quiet and go to sleep at night. 

(Percy has a theory it’s something to do with Pelor, and maybe the stars are also his domain.)

Tary ends up enchanting some little wooden disks with a soft version of Dancing Lights, gets them all set up in the nursery one day while Vex and Percy are out, and unveils the constellations with a dramatic speech. Vesper’s passed out before he’s done and the de Rolos are ecstatic. 

All this to say Vesper has those fucking glow in the dark stars on the ceiling of her room. She grows out of them, but sometimes she’ll still spend a night stargazing with her mom.

(Send me a prompt and I’ll write a ficlet, a HC or an AU idea + share the science fact that inspired the prompt!) 

[superfrumpkin]

WORTH IT.

Read it on AO3

You always knew this day would come. In fact, you knew you had many of them ahead of you. And yet, when your necklace starts glowing, you feel the dread creeping up, the fear of finding out who's turn it was. 

As if she could hear you, Pike's broken voice comes through in your mind: "Kiki, it's Grog. Please, come to Whitestone".

As quickly as you could, you let your father know, open up a portal, and you're out of the Sun Tree. Vex'ahlia, tears in her eyes, and Percy, holding her by the shoulders, are waiting for you there. 

You hug them both tight, and you head to Sarenrae's temple, where Pike and Scanlan are standing beside a lifeless Grog. 

He looks peaceful. His hulking form isn't menacing with his eyes closed, and his mouth so relaxed. It was time. 

You let a few tears fall, hold the gnomes, and you have a small service for the goliath. 

You then head to a tavern and drink his beloved ale in his honor, reminiscing of all the good times. 

"To Grog Strongjaw, Grand Poobah de Doink of All This and That" a slightly drunk Percy shouts "a great fighter and an even greater friend!" 

"To Grog!" You all cheer. 

Just as the day begun, it comes to a close. You're all tipsy, and teary eyed. You say your goodbyes and head back to Zephrah, your heart a little heavy.

You carve a space for a cup of ale next to the shrine to the Raven Queen, and head to sleep. 

//

A few years go by, you visit Whitestone from time to time, get to see all the De Rolos grow up, share a knowing smirk with Percy when Cassandra finally introduces her girlfriend to all of you.

You participate to all the great events, the weddings, the births, the tearful final goodbyes to your allies.

Allura introduces you and the Tal'Dorei council to a group of colorful individuals from Wildemount, called the Mighty Nein (but there's eight of them? No one says it but you all think it), who apparently had saved the World and managed to let it go undetected. 

You recognize them from your mother's stories, they are the ones who brought her back to you. 

You thank them profusely, and you catch the redhead wizard blush as the white haired drow next to him smiles and rubs his shoulder, and stifle laughter knowingly when you see the dark skinned woman, the pale and tall one who was holding her hand and the blue tiefling all looking at Vex with their mouth open. The yellow clad halfling smacks them subtly as their half orc friend politely smiles at all of you. 

It's funny, you knew the feeling of being caught staring at Vex'ahlia very well.

You see Percy grow a beard that makes him look older and cheer loudly alongside Vesper when with an excited "Auntie Keyleth, look!" she druidcrafts a snowdrop in her hands. 

//

 A few years later, as you're tending to the needs of your people, the necklace pulsates again. You have a suspicion this time, and your heart clenches. 

Coming out of the Sun Tree once again, you can see the whole atmosphere is somber. Black flags with the Whitestone crest glowing gold wave in the breeze, falling from the Castle's large windows.

You lean against the Tree that's become like a friend to you.

"Hey, Keyleth. It's quite the sad day. I can feel the grief of the whole city in my roots."

Tears fall and you ask what you already know.

"It's Percy,isn't it?" 

"It is. You might want to go to Lady Vex. I know she might need you." 

You find them once again, gathered in the temple. The De Rolos are surrounding their mother, who's sobbing loudly. You'd seen her this broken only once before, for her brother. 

Only this time, it was your brother, laying limp and quiet, with Pike performing the last rites.

You see Taryon held by Lawrence in the large crowd, but you make a beeline to Vex.  

"Mom, aunt Keyleth is here," Vesper whispers. 

Trinket is next to her of course, whining in pain too.  

Vex'ahlia opens her bloodshot eyes, looks at you briefly and runs into your arms. 

You feel her pain, all of it. You try to convey everything you can in that hug. 

I'm here. I know. I feel it too. I've felt it too. She holds you like you're the last thing keeping her standing. And you hold her like she held you many years before. 

Drinks are had, words and stories are shared. You decide to stay at the Castle one more night, you let Korrin know through Pike. 

Everything goes quiet. In the dead of night, you hear a knock at the door of your guest room. You already know who's going to be on the other side, and yet when you open it and the dim candles show a shattered Vex'ahlia, her cheeks wet with tears, her eyes sunken with exhaustion, your heart aches. 

"Keyleth..." she says with a barely audible whisper. 

No more words are needed. You let her fall into your arms, and hold her through the night, let her sob in your arms until she passes out. 

Eventually, you fall asleep too. 

Vex gives you the raven skull you made for him before you leave, and you make sure to place it next to the mug of ale, with a pocket watch. 

//

Years keep passing by, you see Vesper's magic thrive and see the proud look in her mother's eyes. You know you must share that same look. You see her become every bit of the leader Percy was, with her mother's wits and her father's strong willpower.  

//

Eventually you have to go to Deastock and say goodbye to Taryon, that's another hard hit on Vex. He was her best friend.

This time you carve the logo of his Brigade in what has become the Vox Machina tree in Zephrah. 

//

You and Vex grow closer. She reminds you of him in so many ways, and yet she's so different. A few wrinkles are starting to appear near her eyes, but as you keep observing her, she's never been more beautiful. 

Many things start to become usual occurrences, like you visiting the Castle, and her coming to Zephrah with the help of her daughter. 

Everytime you see each other, it seems like the pieces start falling back together.

One day, as regular as any other, you're watching the sun setting on your tribe and you catch her looking at you intensely. 

"You're so beautiful, darling."  

You're taken aback. She doesn't give you time to reply. Without even being able to register it, her mouth is on yours, and her hand is in your hair. 

You'd lie if you said you hadn't ever dreamed of this. 

Suddenly, she stops, touching her lips in shock "Keyleth, I'm so-" this time you cut her off, shaking your head and catching her sorry with your mouth. 

You're not sorry. You're glad she did that. You would have never had the guts to make the first move. And Gods, her lips are so soft, her hands tangle in your hair and you don't know what to do, but bask in the comfort her body pressed against yours gives you.

She must be feeling something similar, cause her breath becomes shallow as she whispers "Key" in between kisses.

That night you make love and it's sweet, and calm and slow, nothing like you thought Vex would be. You both needed this so bad, you know you've loved her for a long time and if only an ounce of her felt the same, you'd be happy with it. 

Waking up next to her is nothing short of magical. She's peacefully sleeping, her dark, naked back warmly lit by the sunrise creeping in. You softly brush your fingers along her spine, and her eyelids flutter to reveal warm hazel irises, looking at you with a small smile. Your breath catches.

"I love you," you whisper, unable to keep it in anymore. 

Her smile widens. She kisses you and your heart races fast when she says "I love you too, Keyleth," brushing your noses together. 

You feel happier than you've been in a long time. 

// 

Life goes on between Zephrah and Whitestone, you both have responsibilities you can't run from. 

You say your last goodbyes to Allura, and shortly after Kima, who are buried together as they always asked. 

//

Once Vesper is ready to take the helms of Whitestone, Vex decides that it's maybe time to leave, not without hesitation.

"Mom, go. I get it,okay? We will visit all the time, you won't even have time to miss us".

Vex gives her a teary laugh, kisses her forehead, and with an "I'm so proud of you" she comes to Zephrah with you. 

Korrin and Vilya treat her like their own, and you look at her in adoration when she tells you they're like the parents she always wanted. 

//

Vesper keeps her promise, and the De Rolos come visit all the time. You don't catch when Percy IV, their youngest, calls you mama, but Vex does and maybe sheds one little happy tear. 

Zephrah is always buzzing with life, thriving under Keyleth's leadership, and Vex's advice. 

//

Their necklaces glow once more, and they know it's time to say goodbye to Scanlan this time. 

Kaylie plays a sorrowful piece in honor of her father, as you and Vex hold Pike. They both know what it's like to lose a soulmate. 

As always you gather in the tavern and share stories of Scanlan the bard. 

"He died as he lived," Kaylie raises her cup "hard and fast!"

You all share a teary laugh and get drunk as you say goodbye to another friend.

You show Vex the Vox Machina tree for the first time in years, as you carve a space for a miniature shawm. 

She holds you as you both look at the Raven Queen's shrine.

"I hope they're all together," Vex whispers. "I hope he doesn't hate me for this," she chuckles and kisses your cheek.

Just as she says that, as if out of nowhere, a large raven lands between you two on Vex's shoulder. It nuzzles her. 

"I guess you have your answer," you smile and scratch the top of the raven's head. It leans in your hand. 

// 

Life goes on, the kids aren't kids anymore, Vesper leads Whitestone fiercely, you say goodbye to Gilmore a couple of years after Allura and Kima, but you have each other to lean on. 

// 

One day, Vex feels too tired to get out of bed and Trinket lets out a long groan. 

You quickly message Pike, who comes to Zephrah with the children. 

She does a quick scan of her body and confirms what you already know. 

There's nothing wrong with your Vex, nature is claiming her. It's time to say goodbye. 

A sob wracks your body, you knew it was coming. You saw the wrinkles getting more prominent and her hair going gray with the passing of years, but it still hurt to know. 

You can never be ready. 

You let the kids say their goodbyes, not wanting to intrude on such an intimate moment. 

When your turn comes you try to be strong, but your heart is in too much pain. 

She lays a hand on your now wet cheek, and strokes it with her thumb, wiping away some tears. "Kiki..." her flebile whisper is full of love.  

"I don't know if I can do this without you,too".

"Of course you can. You're strong, and caring, and kind. Your people rely on you. You don't need me to succeed. I will always love you, Key. I will always be with you. Far, but never gone, remember?"

You kiss her hand. 

"I love you. You're every bit as beautiful as the day I first met you."

You lean over her to kiss her lips, and with a smile, she lets out her last breath. 

You can't help but hold onto her a little longer. 

Trinket plops down next to you and lays his head on Vex's stomach, breathing heavily. 

You know he must be close as well. 

You clutch his fur, as he breathes one last time, too. 

All the kids and Pike kneel down to hold you, and together, you mourn the loss of Lady Vex'ahlia. 

You take her blue feathers, tie them on your staff, with the black ones you had from Vax. 

In the tree, you leave the tip of an arrow, and one of the pink bows you and Vax once put on the bear. 

//

The De Rolos go back to Whitestone, Pike spends some days with you. 

It will take a long time to heal, but you have plenty of that. 

You'll outlive them all, it's your tragic destiny, you signed up for it. It doesn't hurt any less. 

// 

Pike is of course the next one to go, the worshippers of the Everlight all gather to say goodbye to her Champion, you look around and see just how many lives Pike's kindness had touched. It's beautiful. 

Your tree has another spot, with the symbol of Sarenrae and a miniature mace. 

// 

You carve one last spot on the tree, that you know won't be filled for many years still. 

You leave instructions for your antlers to placed there. 

//

You're thankful to have your parents by your side, as the days blur together. 

Eventually you feel happiness again, when Vesper brings her firstborn to you and you get to see new life blossom in every corner of your tribe, the Ashari growing and leaning on you, the love on your mother's face and the pride on your father's. 

//

Years, and years, and years pass but you never forget them, not once, not for a second.

Vax'ildan, with his smirk and his daggers, and his wings that held you in safety. Your first love. Forever and ever and always. 

Vex'ahlia, matching smirk on softer lips, the best of hagglers, witty and beautiful and quick with her arrows. The lover you got to keep. The lover that got you through. 

Percival, your very best friend, your brother and partner in crime, a quick draw, the smartest of you. A loving husband and father, a fierce leader. 

Grog, big and strong with a heart of gold, with his smile and fun in fights and taverns, his gentle hands with small creatures. Not the smartest, but still one who thought you so much. 

Scanlan, the embodiment of fun and laughter, always ready to pick everyone up and help out, cheering and inspiring with his voice and his charm. 

Pike, the kindest of spirits, her heart bigger than her small frame could ever contain, sweet and loving like a mother to all. 

Taryon, flamboyant and fun, with his desire to be accepted and his mind full of ideas, always accompanied by his thousands versions of Doty, faithful companion. 

Trinket, friend of Vox Machina, her Vex's best friend, as much of a member as everyone else.

You never forget any of them. You feared it would happen after meeting Sprigg, it felt like looking in a mirror of your future. 

But you keep them in your heart until you're old and gray, tell your stories to your tribe, make sure they are spread across the world so that Vox Machina may never be forgotten. 

As you close your eyes for the last time, you dream of them and hope that the Raven Queen will be kind enough to let you see them once more.

//

On the other side, what you see surprises you. It's them, all of them. Vax, with his wings spread, in the middle, smiling bright. Vex is next to him, looking like the day you met. None of them is old and gray. Percy's hair is even black, rid of the stress and weight of the world.

Pike's hair is black as well, like the day you first called her to help you with Grog. 

Everyone looks young, and happy. You feel yourself crying. As you look down, you notice your hair are long and flowing, a fierce red. 

"You did so well, princess." Vex'ahlia winks at you, and you suddenly feel surrounded by all your family's arms. 

You smile in the cuddle pile, think back to your adventures, and realize that everything was worth it, after all. 

[moderndaybard]

2020 Weekly Ficlet 32/52(? We’ll see?)

Priceless Treasures (Critical Role C1 Ficlet)

-

For so long, ‘family’ had meant nothing more than Vax’ildan and herself—anything else and any future ‘somedays’ were set aside in the struggle first to survive, and then to never struggle again.

Eventually, without quite realizing it, ‘family’ had come to mean this mismatched group of people who’d grown from an alliance of convenience into something deeper and indelible without any sort of idea as to how it had happened.

And slowly, after navigating years of love and loss, hardship and hope, Vex’ahlia realized that ‘family’ was something she and Percy wanted to build together.

-------

Vesper Elaina de Rolo came first, with her mother’s black hair, her father’s blue eyes, and Vox Machina’s thirst for adventure. The curious, energetic, caution-less girl did love her home of Whitestone, and took it upon herself to ensure that absolutely no one messed with her younger siblings (except herself, of course), but it was clear even early on, in the way her eyes always strayed to the horizon, that she’d soon enough seek out the wider world.

-------

Two years after Vesper, the twins were born—Ludwig Frederick de Rolo and Whitney Johana de Rolo, brown-haired and brown-eyed and nearly inseparable, save when Ludwig sought the peace of woodland solitude and Whitney set to tinkering and building toys and trinkets at her workbench. It was hard for their parents not to notice and recognize the way the two looked out for each other, or the way that their occasional teasing or bickering failed to entirely hide the deep bond between them…

When the twins were three and Vesper was five, little Percival Henrich de Rolo joined the family (Henrich de Rolo being an ancestor whose story they liked enough to borrow his name when Vex’ahlia found herself unable to name any of their children Vax’ildan, like they had once thought they might…). He was a quiet, serious child from the start, with a gentle heart and soul that challenged assumptions some might be tempted to draw from his eyes, teeth, horn, and tail.

(Once, when the young tiefling felt too singled out, too different from the rest of his family, it was his brother Ludwig who pulled him aside, pointed out that his silvery-white skin and hair echoed the very stone of the Alabaster Sierras that had birthed Whitestone—he was no outsider, but belonged so deeply that it could not be hidden; he was and always would be a part of this place as it was a part of him.)

But more than simply Whitestone itself, the younger Percival found himself drawn time and again to the nearly-deserted shrine to the Raven Queen. He would sit in silent contemplation for hours at a time, and soon took it upon himself to clean, restore, and care for the once-temple made for an uncle he had never met. Vex worried, of course—the goddess had taken so much from her, already—but she also knew better than most the way the call of a deity could press upon a mortal’s heart, and did not interfere. (While she had been unable to give any of her children Vax’s name, she was beginning to think that her second son may one day add it to his own—and found that she was finally at peace with that thought.)

-------

Oliver Julius de Rolo, the last of the five de Rolo children was born two years after his brother, and quickly grew skilled at getting the most mileage out of his position as the baby of the family—as much as his older siblings would let him get away with it.

Percy and Vex were more than a little worried when their youngest took extreme interest in Scanlan’s stories and especially his spells—a worry that didn’t really fade at all when Olly began to lean more towards wizard’s study than bard’s songs: his undeniable preference and visible specialization being magic that was loud, disruptive, and explosive….

-------

Yes, this was not the family Vex’ahlia had ever thought that she’d have, even before Syngorn, but it was better and it was hers and she wouldn’t trade it for the world—no, she’d fight the world itself to keep them safe—

…Like she’d always done for her family.

-

(Also on AO3, with my other ficlets)

[the-littlest-goblin]

@mithrilwren that’s all the excuse I need! De Rolo kid headcanons ok let’s go

Vesper Elaina de Rolo (b. 814 PD)

A tinkerer at heart. Where Percy specialized in small, intricate mechanisms, Vesper prefers large works of civil engineering. Her irrigation system designs revolutionize the farms around Whitestone, and later all of Tal’dorei.

Takes over the title Sophist of Native Ingenuity when Percy retires

Tries so hard to be a Proper Older Sister and a Good Influence, but has caused too much structural damage with her experiments for that reputation to take hold.

Always left in charge when Percy and Vex leave to do adventurer things. She is a cruel and tyrannical babysitter.

Secretly Trinket’s favorite.

Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo IV (b. 816 PD)

“Freddie.” No one calls him Percival unless they’re being ironic, and absolutely no one calls him “Percy.” 

A ranger like his mother. Spends all of his free time exploring the Parchwood and started training with a bow and arrow as soon as he could hold one. His greatest dream is to join Vex as a member of the Grey Hunt (which he eventually does).

Resents being the only one of his siblings saddled with a million middle names. As a teenager he responds to their teasing by being a pompous asshole about it. 

Barn owl companion. He brought a baby owlet with a broken wing home for his mom to heal and it never left.

Johanna Whitney de Rolo (b. 816 PD)

The black sheep of the family, insomuch as they even have one. She’s constantly trying to get a rise out of her parents but Percy and Vex are pretty chill comparably so it often backfires.

The ultimate ride-or-die sibling, especially with her twin.

Must Climb. Trees, walls, buildings, the higher the better. The embodiment of that “He likes to be tall” meme. It’s especially useful for avoiding her tutors when she’s cutting class.

Takes to weapons training the most out of all her siblings.

Also the only one to follow in VM’s adventuring footsteps. She never gets to god-killing levels of danger but she’s been in her fair share of scrapes. Likes to bring home stories that make her siblings jealous and give her parents heart attacks.

Rogue, because I love pain and generational parallels.

Julius Vax’ildan de Rolo (b. 820 PD)

Quiet & Introverted Bookworm. Even more so than Percy was as a kid.

“I’m telling Mom/Dad!” sibling.

Tires of all the history and science books in the library of Castle Whitestone. His interests lie elsewhere: he’s practically memorized the few arcana books they have.

Later starts spending summers in Emon, apprenticing with Gilmore and studying with Allura.

Conjuration wizard

Raven familiar. There’s a longstanding argument with Freddie over whose bird is better.

Madeleine Cassandra de Rolo (b. 822 PD)

The inevitable tiefling de Rolo baby. She has zero angst about it, everyone is just jealous of how awesome her horns are.

Sweet and unassuming youngest sibling, until you realize she just puppy-dog-eyed you into doing her chores for her.

No one can stay mad at her, ever, and she knows it.

The only religious one. She saw Vex glow once and was hooked.

Becomes an acolyte in Whitestone’s (now flourishing) Temple of Pelor. The entire congregation Would Die For Her.

Light domain cleric

[clericofthebalance]

Life Needs Things to Live, Chapter One

I am so sorry for this.  My brain took every romcom cliché and AU I love and created this disaster fic. It’s a modern au blended with college au, a sprinkle of single parent au, and every single Hallmark-romcom cliché I hold dear in my bitter black heart.  It only gets more goopy from here.

Warning: vague illusions to Anna Ripley and child abuse

-*-*-*-

“Are you sure you don’t mind, Kiki?”  Percy struggled with his bag and cell phone and holding onto both dog and small child, “I know it’s last minute, but Victor just offered me another shift.  I can’t afford not to take it.”

“Of course I don’t mind! What else are friends for?”

“You know you’re more like a sister to me, Keyleth.  Thank you. Again.  I’ll buy you wine.”

“You know I won’t say no to that!  I’ll be by around six with food.”

“No fast food.  You know how I feel about that.”

“Yeah, yeah.  Party pooper.”

“You don’t have to deal with the crash!  Oh, sh-shoot. Pepper, get the keys please.”

“I’ll let you go, okay? See you later!”

Big blue eyes stared up at him with an impressive, familiar scowl.  His daughter was a firebrand already, displaying the full force of the de Rolo stubbornness.  Percy stifled the grin as he ran his fingers through the messy short hair, basking in the slight smile that his daughter offered him.  His daughter, his little girl, his reason for living.  She was the only good thing to come out of the last shitty, shitty decade.  Her blue eyes stared up at him, slightly warm but still hard, a huge improvement from when he had finally been awarded custody after over a year of fighting.

“Daddy, why is Aunt Kiki coming again?”  Ah, the reason for the scowl.  She was displeased at him having to work.  He ushered her in, dropping both of their backpacks on the bench, unharnessing Pepper so the dog could be more comfortable, “Shoes!”

“Thank you, pup,” he untied his heavy work boots then bent to help Beau.  She scowled at him and sat down to do it herself, much to his amusement, “I got another shift at the garage.  A little extra money would be helpful.  Just in case.”

Percy made it a habit to never lie to Beau, despite her age.  He would conceal certain topics, but she was far too mature to be treated like an infant.  He had been side-eyed before, but it wasn’t like he gave a fuck what some middle-aged Karen thought about his parenting.  Beau was better behaved than half the little shits at her preschool and daycare.

For instance, she was only four and had just carefully removed her own shoes—blue converse that matched the black ones he wore on his days off—to place them next to his boots.  She hung up her coat and her backpack on her own hook without prompting, following his more practiced motions a little clumsily. Beau gamely followed their dog into the living room, plopping down by the massive black shepherd and stroking her ears fondly, obviously deep in thought.

“Oh.  Okay.  Can I watch a karate movie again?”

“You and Aunt Kiki should talk about it.  Maybe she’d like to watch something else,” Percy chuckled at the offended look this warranted. Beau felt very strongly that karate movies were the best movies.  Only Star Wars or Mulan stood a chance of pulling her attention away from her heroes.

“But karate!”

“Yes, karate.  But Keyleth might want to watch a movie about animals instead.”

She humphed, “I’d watch anythin’ if I could be in a class…”

“No karate until you start school-school and go a month without starting a fight,” Percy grinned as he unpacked his schoolbooks to settle them on the kitchen table to study. This was an old fight, one they had at least once a week.  Percy wanted so badly to cave, but he was determined to hold the line on at least a few things.  To the best of his ability.

“I was defendin’ Jester and Fjord!  They was bein’ mean!”

“And you started the fight then got caught.  Remember, be sneaky so that the children who deserve to be in trouble get in trouble,” yeah, he didn’t give a single fuck what anyone else thought of his parenting skills, “Go wild if an adult corners you and tries to touch you in a way you don’t like.  Headbutt them or kick them then run.”

“Duh,” she rolled her eyes and he really did laugh.  He was raising an absolute monster of a daughter and he did not care one bit.

***

Keyleth hung up the phone and bit her lip, worrying at it.  Percy sounded so strained on the phone.  She glanced up, thinking of the two empty rooms on the fifth floor. Maybe she should mention it to her roommates and family.  The future botanist wandered downstairs, rehearsing exactly what she would say to them. It was around five on a Friday, so everyone but Tiberius would be home and gathered in the communal kitchen.

She heard the shouting and playfighting before she entered, laughing at the sight.  Grog and Vax were fighting over the last of the cereal again, Grog towering over the slighter man with ease.  That never stopped Vax, stubborn as he was, despite the nearly two feet and hundred pounds Grog had on him.  Vex was watching with a grin, Trinket’s huge head in her lap.  Pike was ignoring everything around her, including an amorous Scanlan, in favor of a medical text.  Just another typical day at 1215 Mercer Lane.

“Um, guys?  Can I talk to you for a second?”

Vax used the moment to steal the cereal box and scramble on top of the fridge out of Grog’s reach, prompting a rage-fueled shout from Grog.  Vex focused on Kiki with her sharp eyes, Scanlan turned with a shit-eating grin, and Pike slammed her book shut rather loudly to stop the fight.  Mamma Pike in action, gathering attention as always.

Keyleth took a deep, deep breath, “So you know my friend?  The one in my painting and botany classes I study with?”

“The rich boy?  Walks like he’s got a stick up his arse?” Vax piped up.  Their other friends looked a bit constipated trying to recall him, “White haired grumpy guy.”

A chorus of ‘ohs’ echoed around the kitchen as they all pictured the rather strange, very formal man. Well, everyone but Vex.  She looked a bit put out at not knowing this guy. She liked being in the know almost as much as she liked bargaining.

“That’s Percy. He-Okay, he’s not actually rich his parents are but they haven’t talked in literal years at this point and he lives on his own, going to school and working two or three jobs.  He’s a single dad and he’s got a shit load of issues that make it hard for him to work and go to school so he’s struggling even if he won’t admit it to me.  I know we discussed renting out the two rooms next to Vex’s and I was wondering if we could interview them,” she flooded the room with words, gasping, shaking at the effort it took to actually vocalize all of it, fidgeting with her bracelet.

“Good job, Keyleth. That was a lot to get out,” sweet Pike beamed at her, “His name is Percy?”

“Percival de Rolo. His daughter is named Beau and they have a dog named Pepper.”

Scanlan wrinkled his nose, “A kid means no wild parties.”

“Oh, yes, because we so often host those,” Vex snarked, leaning onto one elbow, stroking Trinket’s ears, “He has a kid?  At our age?”

“Why doesn’t he just ask his parents if they’re so wealthy?” Vax narrowed his eyes, always suspicious, “He looks privileged enough.”

Keyleth began to chew her lip, stressing about how much to reveal, “They just don’t talk.  At all.  I don’t know much and I don’t want to say what I do know.”

“Is he a good person?” Pike tilted her head, eyes solemn.

“The best! Well, he’s terrible but still wonderful.  He works really hard to provide for Beau.  He fought for custody from Child Protective.  They had her in an awful home ad he didn’t stop until he had custody of her.  Worked three jobs, went to class, and to court.  He loves her.  It would really help him out to have lower rent and live-in sitters.”

“She a cool kid?  Or she into princesses and all that shit?” of course Grog was concerned with Beau’s preferences.  Pink and glitter would have been his second worst nightmare.

“The coolest!” Keyleth beamed, “She’s more into martial arts.  They have a deal she can start taking classes when she goes into Kindergarten and goes a month without being caught fighting the school bullies.  She likes Mulan and Merida, but she’d rather watch Bruce Lee any day.”

“Sounds legit!”

Vax shared a deep, thoughtful glance with Vex before they both nodded their consent.  Pike beamed, “So five votes yes.  Scanlan?”

“For you, Pikey, I suppose I’ll agree.  Maybe we could go on a date?  To discuss the new roommate?”

“We’ll have a house dinner to discuss them.  After the interview.  So, who’s going to tell Tibsy?”

The others muffled laughter at Pike’s kind shut down.  Scanlan would never learn at all.  Keyleth beamed at her family, knowing in her gut that getting Percy and Beau in the house would be absolutely wonderful.

[mollymauk-teafleak]

A very very happy Christmas to my lovely girlfriend @spiky-lesbian, I’m so lucky to have you, I hope you like this!

------

Being a father made Vax think of his mother.

Not that he didn’t think of her often already, whenever he’d heard the song she used to sing come on the radio around Midwinter, whenever he’d need something from the back of his closet and find the scarf she nearly always wore, whenever something small and fleeting would bring the grief rushing back so hard it would turn his airways to cement and he’d choke on it for days.

But now every time he’d hold his daughters close, feel them tuck up small and rest their little heads under his chin, every time their eyes would brighten when they saw him, every time they’d look for him when something scared them, he’d think of her. Of how she’d done this for him. Of how she’d felt the same intense rush of love, the dizzying sensation of knowing you’d do anything to protect them, the ache of the impermanence of it all when it had become your oxygen.

Vax thanked the gods for her every day. Without her, the living proof that it could be done, that such a deep and desperate love could be picked up and carried around every day, he had no idea how he would have managed.

Sometimes the thread was so strong in his mind, he could feel her next to him, the warmth she’d always seemed to radiate, the smell of clean cotton and soap. He could feel her hand on his shoulder when he’d sing her namesake back to sleep, whenever she’d fuss in the night, when he’d kiss the many bumps and bruises Johanna collected as she grew up.

He could feel her hand in his hair, fingers stroking through the strands like she used to do when she could sense something on his mind, when he realised he wanted another one.

That was how Frederickstein von Musel Klossowski De Rolo IV arrived, five years after his sisters.

A second child was different to the first. It was like dancing a dance you already knew the steps to but every so often the music would get faster or slower without warning and you’d put a foot wrong. But it was no less exciting, heartbreaking, joyous and exhausting in equal measures.

Now Freddy, nicknamed that way because Vax maintained a child didn’t need a name that took longer to say than they’d been alive, was just over two. He had big blue eyes like his papa and fluffy black curls like his daddy, he was shyer than his sister Johanna but loved to follow her around devotedly and he was in love with reading as his sister Elaina, who read to him every night.

Right now he was sat on the living room rug, the afternoon sun forming a warm little puddle of gold around him, burbling an approximation of an engine noise as he rolled a toy tractor back and forth.

Vax exhaled sadly, feeling that phantom hand on his shoulder again, “He isn’t going to like it.”

“No,” Percy sounded equally defeated beside him, “But he needs them or it will just keep being a problem for him. Damn the shitty eyesight genes in my family.”

Vax nudged him with an elbow, already well aware of where his husband’s mind would be, “This isn’t your fault.”

Percy gave a grunt that was neither assent nor refusal. He anxiously passed the long, thin box from hand to hand restlessly before starting into the room.

Freddy looked up when he heard them come in, smiling his adorable gap toothed smile, “Papa! Daddy!”

“Hello there, little man,” Percy knelt on the carpet beside him, “Got your tractor?”

“Yep!” Freddy waved it in one pudgy fist, “Playing farm.”

“That’s great,” Vax smiled softly, “Can we talk to you about something?”

Freddy seemed to sense the more grown up tone in his voice, looking up curiously, giving a little nod.

They’d noticed it in small ways. How Freddy never seemed sure who was coming into the room, how as a little baby he’d sob until he was picked up, only when held close seeing that it was his dads and he didn’t have anything to worry about. How he would screw his fists against his eyes until they were red. How he seemed unable to follow things when they moved in front of his eyes.

Pike had recommended a trip to the pediatrician who’d passed them on to an optician that specialised in infants. Freddy had seen it as a fun trip, he’d got to sit in a special chair and a nice drow man had asked him to look at a few things and then given him a treat.

And now they had to convince a two year old that was already sensitive to textures and sensations to wear a pair of glasses.

“We’ve got you a present,” Vax explained, taking the box from Percy, “A present that will help you.”

At the mention of a present, Freddy got excited, “Aminals for my farm?”

“Animals,” Percy corrected, smiling, thinking privately that if this didn't go well, a whole fleet of farm animals might be in order, “And no, this is something else. Lets try them on.”

The little blue glasses came on a rubbery band to stretch around his head and keep them in place. Almost as soon as they fixed in place, tucked in amongst his curls and over his slightly pointed ears, Freddy’s face crumpled.

“Don’t like them,” he mumbled, little fingers scrabbling at them.

“It’ll take some getting used to,” Percy looked fretful, his worst fear about this coming true in front of him, “But you’ll see…”

“No,” Freddy’s voice took on that dangerous, wobbly ‘I’m about to full on tantrum and there’s no avoiding it’ quality, “No, don’t like! Gone please. Gone please!”

“Hey, little bud, its okay,” Vax said softly, seeing the panic on his face.

Percy scrambles for something positive, “Love, look. I wear glasses, see? They’re not so bad once you get used to them and then we’ll match.” He reached behind his ears and made his own delicate, gold rimmed glasses bounce in the way that never failed to make them laugh when they were babies.

But Freddy seemed past even that, his rounded cheeks flushed red, upset and angry, “No. Don’t want to, don’t want to match!”

Percy clearly tried very hard not to look wounded at that, hands dropping to his sides and leaving his glasses sitting on his nose all wrong. He tried.

Vax winced internally and gently removed the glasses, “Okay, we’ll try wearing them for little bits at a time and help you get used to them, alright?”

Freddy pouted the way only a two year old could, sinking down into an angry little stormcloud of himself. Percy tried to reach out and bring him into a cuddle but he shrugged him off, mumbling a no under his breath.

Vax took Percy’s hand, knowing his husband would break throwing himself against that particular brick wall again and again. Handing him a problem, particularly an emotional one, with no solution but to wait, was like taking away his hands. So firmly but gently, he picked Percy up off the floor and took him back through to the kitchen.

“I...I hate when this happens,” he eventually mumbled miserably, once a steaming mug of tea had been put in his hands.

“When what happens?” Vax looked over his shoulder from where he was washing the spoon, “Our kids throw tantrums every five seconds practially?”

“No,” Percy groaned, “When they suddenly grow up so a hug isn’t enough to fix their problems any more. It happens so fast, just...just when your back is turned. And suddenly it’s not enough.”

Vax felt a tug deep in his chest and the faint impression of a hand on his shoulder that wasn’t really there. Of course he understood, of course he hated it too.

“Now don’t go all maudlin and philosophical on me,” he murmured, coming over and resting his head on Percy’s chest, wrapping his arms around his waist, “We knew this was going to be tricky but it’s nothing we’ve done wrong. We just have to try something new to help him.”

“Yeah…” Percy sat his mug on the counter behind him so he could throw himself into the embrace, clutching him the way he clearly needed to just for a moment.

And then Percy suddenly seemed to stiffen, like something had grabbed him. He disentangled himself and Vax saw that look in his eyes, the one he always got when he’d had an idea that would mean he’d be in his workshop for a while and reemerge probably with some new burns and cuts.

“I’ll be back in just a moment!” he gasped, heading, of course, down towards the door that had once led to the basement that was still cold, still damp, but was now his workshop.

Vax gave a bemused little laugh, shrugging and claiming Percy’s tea for his own. That happened so often he’d started adding more sugar to Percy’s drinks, enough to suit his taste rather than his husband’s.

Of course not being able to snap his fingers and fix every problem his children collected weighed on him, just like it did for Percy. Back when the girls were very young, he stressed himself to bits over every faded smile and skinned knee and bad mark on a piece of homework. But he’d learned over time, growing as his children did. That was a comforting thought; at least they were all in it together.

And eventually, as he’d hoped, there came the padding of small feet and a red eyed little Freddy appeared in the doorway, clutching his tractor.

“Hi daddy,” he cheeped, a little sadly.

“Hello, little buddy,” Vax smiled, holding out an arm so Freddy could waddle closer and rest his head against his daddy’s knee, like he loved to do, “Feeling better?”

“Mm,” he felt a little nod, “Don’t like them, daddy.”

Vax didn’t have to ask what he meant, “I know, Freddy, I know. I’d never ask if it wasn’t really important but they really will help you. Can you be a big, brave boy for me and try to make it work?”

“Girls don’t have to,” Freddy mumbled bitterly.

“Yeah,” Vax sighed, knowing the unfairness of that would be hard to explain, “Your eyes just need a little help. Like daddy’s.”

Freddy made a frustrated little noise, “Don’t look like daddy’s. Stupid glasses.”

“Now where did you learn to curse like that, little man?” Vax had to laugh, his righteous anger was just too adorable.

Thankfully, he was saved from having to explain what curses were by Percy crashing back into the kitchen, looking a little haggard, like he’d been moving at a hundred miles an hour for a good while.

“Freddy!” the mania melted off his face when he saw his son, “Look what I made!”

Freddy looked delightedly curious, he loved to see what his papa made in his workshop, “Something for me?”

“Kind of,” Percy knelt down and smiled hopefully.

What was in his hands was what clearly used to be his spare pair of glasses. But now they looked very different. A large, thick strip of leather had been hastily attached to them with metal clasps, in place of the usual arms, sized perfectly so it would fit around Percy’s head.

In short, a perfect approximation of Freddy’s glasses, made for an adult.

Percy whipped off his usual pair and attached his new, modified ones, fitting them to his head. Vax had to swallow hard so any sobs that would very much ruin the moment stayed firmly in his throat.

Freddy’s eyes were wide and delighted, “We...we match!”

“Yeah,” Percy’s face split into a wide grin, “We match, love.”

If there was anyone who was good at finding new solutions, interesting ways around problems, it was his husband, Vax thought proudly. He felt that phantom hand on his shoulder squeeze and he smiled softly.

He didn’t have his mother anymore. But he had Percy, and that was everything.

[collective-remnants-rwby]

Bio: Peter Helleskal

Team PALE’s glorious leader, Peter Helleskal!

Bio: Latest scion of the Helleskals, a Valean faunus family as involved with the White Fang as the Belladonnas were. They enjoyed a place of surprisingly high status within the town of Rauha, even as the WF turned towards darker paths. This would change with the betrayal of Peter’s uncle to forces loyal to Adam Taurus’ ‘cause’, and the subsequent death of Peter’s grandfather. It would be to this atmosphere of betrayal and heartbreak that Peter would be born as the youngest child of the would-be matriarch of the Helleskals. With eyes of silver.

Peter grew up idolizing team RWBY, containing both a faunus rights leader and the only other silver eyed individual he’d ever known. He’d grow into a charismatic and outgoing young man, but his childhood bliss would come to an end with the death of his eldest brother by an assassin who was seemingly after him. This would spark an intense guilt and rage he now hopes to conquer. When the time came to pick academies, the one where Ruby Rose was actually TEACHING became the obvious choice, and he hopes to learn from her how to harness his power and conquer his rage.

Inspiration: Dragon of Cadmus

Partner: Ezhil von Brandt

Symbol: Sword with a dragon head for a blade

Home: Rauha, Vale

Species: Komodo Dragon Faunus (Tail)

Height: 6′3

Aura Color: White

Hair Color: Black (Dyed White)

Eye Color: Silver

Weapon: Dragon’s Claw-Breaking with the time honored SEW tradition of scythes, the Dragon’s claw is a massive single bladed swordgun, the blade of which can unleash an axe blade or fold down to a pistol with a sniper rifle attachment. Dragonflame-A four barreled rotating shotgun.

Semblance: Sow the Legion-Growing up a lonely kid, Peter liked pretending to command teams on adventures, which his older siblings would indulge him in. Following the trauma of his brother’s death, Peter’s semblance manifested in the ability to create soldiers. Starting with ‘teeth’ of aura, he can generate soldiers in his own image, or implant them in nearby materials that they will burst free of, manifesting aura weapons as well. They’re perfectly loyal, but prone to infighting if not being commanded.

Trivia

- Appearance based off of Percy de Rolo, but personality wise is much more outgoing & charismatic.

- Rauha is actually the settlement where Vale-Mistrali relations boiled over into the first shots of the Great War, but was resettled after the war.

- Family is Kurt Sangre(Father, lawyer, horned lizard faunus), Mimi Helleskal(Mother, doctor, snake faunus), Thulian Helleskal(Uncle, terrorist, snake faunus), Stanley Sangre(Brother, doctor, gila faunus, deceased) & Cybele Sangre(Sister, doctor, gecko faunus).

- Thulian Helleskal is in fact a character from team CAFE’s story. Like Cinder, this is the ‘bad’ end for him. 

[kikiashari]

NAME: Keyleth Ashari

AGE: 24

PRONOUNS: She/her

OCCUPATION: Owner of a flower shop

❀ I’ll follow the canon of the livestream, and I’m following until after she decided to turn into a goldfish, so shortly before they have to go to Marquet for the third time. I’m trying to keep her bio as spoiler free as possible and shortened as much as possible too❀

Canon Bio:

❀ Keyleth is a half elf, born in Zephra home of the air Ashari, daughter of Korrin and Vilya. Her mother was next in line and become the leader of the air Ashari -the Voice of the Tempest- and so she went into her Aramente to meet the earth, fire and water Ashari. However years passed and there were no news about her, it was decided that she had passed away -though Keyleth held hope that she was alive somewhere- And so the became the next in line and had to depart for her own Aramente.

❀She ended up in the town of Stillben near Zephra where she met the other two half-elven twins Vex’halia and Vax’ildan, the goliath Grog Strongjaw and gnome Scanlan Shorthald. They began working together in many little jobs. Later they met Grog’s childhood friend Pike Trickfoot and later on they met the human Percival Fredrickstein von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III, but you can call him Percy. 

❀ The party goes in many adventures that eventually lead them to the capital city of Emon where they discover a plot against the King and proof that he had his family had been possessed by demons. Eventually with they befriend Allura Vysoren who begins to help them in making things right. During their investigation they end up finding out a member of the council general Krieg was actually a blue dragon and they manage to defeat him.   shortly after that they manage to save the royal family, in thanks the King throws them a parade and makes them part of the council of Tal’Dorei.

❀ Through it all they had been hearing about missing children and during a festival in Emon they noticed a strange golden eyed child taking away one of the King’s sons. They chase to a pocket dimension where an entity was kidnapping children and using them as shields, Keyleth while trying to save one of the kids accidentally kill him something that weighs heavily on her. Things calm down they even get their own keep. one day Allura asks them to look for a friend of hers Kima of Vord. The party embarks to Kraghammer where after many perils they rescue Kima, they then take her home. Is in this continent where Keyleth meets the fire Ashari, succeeding in the task they set out for her.

❀ Once they are back they hear about the incoming visit of the Briarwoods, whom Percy tells them are the people that murdered his whole family. After a tense dinner with them things go south. To clear their name and more importantly help Percy get revenge they set out to Whitestone. They find out Delilah works for an entity called the whispered one. After a hard battle they managed to win and free Whitestone (...)

❀ Once they are back in Emon they are asked to be present at an important announcement by the King. But this is cut short when 4 dragons destroy the city, a white, a black, a green and a massive red one. Later they find many other cities in Tal’Dorei were attacked as well. She finds out that the red dragon, leader of all the others broke free from the fire plane destroying the fire Ashari village as it escaped, and that he had escaped with the help of someone the Ashari had taken in but in reality was a green dragon. Whitestone becomes a safe haven for people as Vox Machina decides to fight the dragons. for this they need legendary weapons they go through all of Exandria looking for them and even the Faewild.

❀ Eventually after a lot of ups and downs they defeat the dragons, and finally she goes to the water Ashari where they tell her that her mother was lost while she was doing her trail and all that was recovered was her leg. Still Keyleth remains hopeful she’s alive. After that she and her friends go back to Zephra where she is named the Voice of the Tempest.

❀ She, Vex, Pike and a new friend Tary open a bakery in Whitestone, they all go to the beach and have a fun time, Vax and her live together in Zephra, she creates with Pery and Tary alarm stones to give to cities in Tal’Dorei so everyone will know if one is in danger and send help, 

Echo Springs Bio:

❀ Keyleth was born into a very loving and happy family, her parents owned a successful flower shop. And so she grew up learning all about plants and taking care of them, she always felt more at ease when surrounded by nature, she liked to imagine how it would be to be a bird or a squirrel.

❀ She was home schooled during her childhood, which made her a little sheltered and awkward  but she does love to meet new people and she loves to think people are good. When she was fifteen her mother mysteriously disappeared, she doesn’t think she would just abandon her family and wants to think she’ll come back someday.

❀ Now her father decided to retire and now she in charge of taking care of the shop, it may not be a big deal but to her she’s very set on doing well and making her father proud -a thing that she has specially strived for since her mother went away- 

Some of her dreams:

❀dragons destroying a city

❀ a cherry blossom overlooking a village in the middle of mountains

❀ a kraken 

[ruthdemoofins]

Cor Tutor - Chapter 3 - Perc’ahlia modern college AU

Read the first two chapters on AO3: (X)

Thank you all for the support, like honestly, it makes me teary eyed and smiley and dfisdjfsdjfod. As usual, I checked this over on my own, so please let me know if there are any ugly mistakes or let me know what you thought! :)

My semester has started up again so I'm afraid my updates won't be quite so speedy. Thanks for putting up with me!

Percival had known many odd days in his life, many days that had him questioning if he was truly awake and alive, or rather, if he was simply in a some kind of horrible, twisted nightmare.

He’d felt that way, at least, at eighteen, as he stood in front of a roaring, invasive monster of a fire that had consumed his home and the majority of his family. He could still hear the screams of his sister as she struggled in his arms to break free, as though she could put it out with her own with her own tears and fists. Cassandra had always been braver than him and he wouldn’t doubt that now, she could put out a fire with her bare fists if needed. Back then, however, she had been small and fragile, shaking in his arms like a leaf. Percival could still feel the smoke furling into the back of his throat, making a home there deep within his flesh as he let out a raw, enraged roar.

This evening, however, had been different from those fiendish memories.

The rest of his stay in the library had involved him attentively listening to Keyleth vent about Vax and how horribly hard it was to read him. The majority of the time, Percival sat in silence as she wildly gestured into the air, offering what little advice he could when she gave a pause (it wasn’t good advice, though. He hadn’t much experience in terms of “dating.”)

As unconfident as he’d felt in his advice, Keyleth had seemed to feel a bit better and thus, he felt bit better too. It was hard to come across people like Keyleth, who were perfectly content with sitting in a comfortable silence and brimmed life and enthusiasm. They were opposites, he knew, but it took a negative and a positive charge to connect, didn’t it?

He’d left to pick up dinner for him and Cassandra at Jarret’s Exotic Foods (the amount of spice that man used was nearly a travesty. Nearly. His innate ability to level out spices to the point of nearly being unbearable and both addictively wonderful was still unfathomable to him) and made his merry way to their apartment.

Percy had happily been within his own thoughts, as he usually was, when he noticed a young woman and man stopped in their tracks ahead of him, the man earnestly speaking towards her while her posture seemed to be as rigid as a well-supported beam.

Before he could speculate further, the woman caught sight of him and briskly turned towards him. He’s sworn he’s seen her around campus before, one of the many faces that are vaguely familiar to him. Her eyes attract his immediate attention as she comes towards him, nearly aggressively. Aggressively enough that he almost trips on the uneven sidewalk as he slides one of his boots back to evade her charge.

Her eyes, though. They’re sharp, immensely sharp. It’s funny, really, he thinks, that he’s so focused on the way they seem. Most men notice a woman’s eyes for being ‘strikingly blue’ or ’warmly brown,’ but he’s standing here noticing the way of them. She’s confident. Her lips tug in a sudden smirk that unnerves him completely, like she already owns him without even knowing him, like he’s just putty in her hands.

It’s nothing like Dr. Anna Ripley, nothing like Delilah Briarwood. He thinks of their faces, meticulously pinned upon the wall in the back of his closet, from newspapers, from the images he’s located online. Their smiles curve in a way that would make one feel as though they owned them and intended upon crushing them, scorching their fleshy muscles from their body, and whittling their bones into small toothpicks to pick their flesh from their grinning, white teeth, but this…this is different.

“Darling,” she’d cooed at him, like she wholly adored him. If only she knew the rampant, dark, horrible thoughts in his head! If only she knew what he’d do if he had Anders, Ripley, Delilah or Silas before him in that moment.

The entire exchange had been horribly awkward, resulting in theft of his takeout.

Percival had been entirely sure to glare as hard as humanly possible at her as he saw the thought upon her face, something along the lines of: “Ah, this appears to be takeout, and by the significant, spicy smell, Jarett’s takeout, no less. I think I’ll be taking this, thank-you-very-much.”

And she had.

He could’ve stopped her, but he didn’t.

He’d only stood there, watching the stranger happily strut away, bag swaying in her clawed grip, noting that the other stranger, the man, had disappeared.

Percival hastily returned to Jarett’s, re-ordering and seating himself at one of the tables with his fingers steepled as he brooded over his misfortune.

“Come now, chum, turn that frown upside down, ay?”

Percy jerked his head up to eye a rather short young man with a charming smile (though not as bewitching as the takout-thief’s) and a rather dashing maroon beret.

“I..?” he gave the man a confused look before noting the bag extended towards him. Ah. “Ahem…Thank you,” he murmured, taking the bag and entirely disregarding the previous comment made. Chum?

By the time he’d arrived home, or rather, in the flat he and Cassandra shared a few minutes off of campus, it was dark.

Cassandra, of course, was seated at their kitchen table, her face pinched in concentration as she meticulously underlined a passage in the heavy book open atop the table.

Percy patiently stood in silence before the table, waiting for her to finish underlining before placing the bag down before her.

“It’s nearly seven, Percival,” she shot him a severe glare over the top of the takeout bag before slowly reaching in to locate her dinner.

“I apologize,” he gave a curt nod, sighing heavily, “I-ah…had quite the time getting this back,” he hoped she wouldn’t pry. It seemed wholly pathetic to be robbed of takeout, especially by a woman wearing an oversized shirt with a bear face printed upon it (the “I hate Mondays” beneath said bear face hadn’t helped the ridiculousness of the situation).

“Well, it’s still warm, at least,” Cassandra brushed a brown and gray-imbrued lock of hair from her face as she opened her container, giving a contented breath. “Still, thank you. You haven’t a clue how hungry I am.”

“Hungry work?” Percy questioned as he reached in the bag for his Styrofoam takeout box, nodding to her book.

“I only need to memorize fifty fleshy judiciary laws for tomorrow,” she disgustedly swept her gaze down upon her open textbook before digging into her curry.

For a moment, he’s unsure if he should try to inspire her with “brotherly advice,” but self-loathing immediately diminishes the thought. What good are you? You couldn’t even save her from those years with the Briarwoods. Why would she want your input? You can hardly manage yourself. The back of his throat ached and he realized that his takeout box was squeaking under his grip.

“I…” he slowly glanced from his hand to Cassandra, looking to him with a confused furrow of her brow. “I’m going to eat,” he says, his chest twisting with guilt as she musters a weak smile and nod for him.

Wanting to evade any further fucking up, Percy quickly made his way towards the hall.

“Oh, and Percy?”

His steps halted entirely, Percival glancing back to Cassandra.  

“Do refrain from staying up all night trying to find more links, won’t you? You’ve squeezed everything as dry as it can be. Sleep will help you more, at this point.”

More self-loathing flooded his chest, weighing it down and making it hard to breathe for a moment. He was pathetic. He should be the one telling Cassandra to take care, his younger sister, but she’s the one telling him to take care.

Weakly, he clears his throat, “I’ll try. You do the same,” his anxiety diminishes a bit as she manages an honest smile, nodding.

“I know us both well enough to know there’s a good chance we won’t listen to each other, but it’s worth a shot.”

She’s right, unbearably so, and he wishes he could tell her he loves her, but he can’t bring himself to do so. She doesn’t deserve such a pathetic love from him, nor does he deserve it. All he’s brought upon the poor girl was stress

Percy resumed his walk to his room, carefully closing the door behind him before moving to his closet.

He pushed his hanging clothes (a lovely mixture of obscure band t-shirts, heavy coats, and sweaters; the entirety of his wardrobe either black or a dark navy blue) to the side so he could properly view the mass of information on the back wall.

Articles upon articles, pictures upon pictures, all pinned and covered in yarn lines, meticulously linked together.

The plethora of string all led to the center of the wall, creating a macabre sort of sun. Upon the center, a newspaper clipping was carefully pinned to the wall. “Tragic Fire Wipes Out Majority of de Rolo Family.”

Percy steps closer, touches the picture included with the article of a nearly-grown boy with harrowed, wide-eyed stare standing next to a younger girl with the same, shell-shaken expression upon her face. Behind them, he could faintly make out the smoke lifting from the remains of their home, even in black-and-white.

He wishes he could go back in time to them, wishes he could snatch them both away from the incoming social workers, the long discussions with adults who either looked upon them with sadness or with greed. He still remembers standing on the street as the Briarwoods drove away with Cassandra. Her hair had still been brown, then.

He had been alone, he had been alone with money, but he was alone and the people who he knew had something to do with the murder of his family had his sister.

“I know I expected it, but this doesn’t look like ‘taking it easy’ to me.”

He startled and jerked up, looking to his side to find Cassandra, giving him a cool, skeptical stare.

“I-erm…was only thinking,” he lamely excused, sighing a bit as the excuse fluttered aimlessly in the air above her head, completely ignored.

Cassandra extended a hand, disdain on her face as she offered him the box of cigarettes he’d forgotten to bring with school to him that day.

But still, she provided them to him. She understood his necessary darkness.

“Thank you,” he curtly nodded to her with a solemn gaze as he took the pack.

“Please rest tonight, Percival. I promise we’ll have our day, but don’t lose your mind to insomnia beforehand. And do eat your food before it goes cold?” she worriedly looks over him and her expression is enough to spur him into placing a hand upon her shoulder.

“Yes, mother,” he sighs heavily for effect, a bit contented to see her manage another smile.

“You’d be a wreck without me here to dawdle behind you,” Cassandra lifts a brow before taking a step back. “At least eat before you worry yourself to sleep,” he doesn’t miss her soft sigh after requesting this.

“I will,” he vows and waits for her to slowly make her leave before tapping a cigarette from the box she’d passed him.

Percival sat upon his bed for a long while, inhaling and exhaling smoke as his eyes glared towards the mass of information upon his closet wall.

Fuck.

He snapped from his near-trance as he recalled he had a student to tutor, scrambling to locate his phone and write a cordial text to Vex’ahlia, the potential asshole.

Pleased with his sent text, Percy reached over for his takeout, recalling Cassandra’s stern expression with a faint smile before delving in.

He was certain between studies for mechanical engineering and pouring over his closet like he could find some hidden code within the papers he’s read over-and-over, he wouldn’t be sleeping much that night.  

-----

“You.”

Percy was the first to speak, after taking in the way her surprised expression literally “slipped into something more comfortable,” or rather, slipped into a calm, challenging smirk.

His voice was a hiss and his eyes his eyes accusatory, finger crooked out towards her from his seat.

At worst, he expected that, perhaps, the student he would be helping would be completely, irrationally stubborn, or perhaps rude, or perhaps an asshole.

He didn’t expect them to be the very vexingly (now literally Vexing) attractive asshole who’d stolen his dinner the previous night.

“Yes, me, ‘darling’,” she was ridiculously cool about this entire situation, even with his obviously pissed stance. Vex’ahlia whipped her braid over her shoulder before dumping her bag onto the table he occupied, sinking into the seat adjacent to him. Percy ridiculed the entire thing, the way she slouched down in her seat and crossed her legs, twiddled with the end of her braid, chewed rather aggressively on her gum.

He would’ve admired her lacks of shits given in a different situation, but right now, he was entirely sour about his lost takeout. Vex’ahlia lifted her sharp gaze to his and immediately rolled her eyes (at his expression, perhaps). “Oh, stop it,” she swatted at the air in front of him dismissively, “The stomach wants what the stomach wants, can you blame me? It was Jarett’s!”

She did have him there; Jarett’s food was masterfully crafted, even for quick takeout. The spice of it all…snap out of it, man! She’d entirely wooed him again already, hadn’t she? Speaking to him so fluidly, as though they were good friends!

Not that he would mind that.

“I do blame you. You stole it,” he slowly replied after a heavy, outraged huff.

“Ugh,” Vex’ahlia rolled her eyes again and dropped her cheek to rest upon her fist, looking at him with-was that interest?

“Fine. I’ll buy you some fucking dinner. I’m not one to give my money to anyone, so you’d better understand how lucky you are,” she snapped her gum, crinkling her nose.

Percival tried to pry his thoughts from how ridiculously sweet her face looked with her nose crinkled-you’ve only just met her for the…first…second time and you’re already bewitched-and managed a very good scoff in reply, “How lucky am I that a thief is going to refund me? Would you like me to pay for shipping and handling as well?” he primly questioned with a quirk of his brow.

Percy visibly startled a bit as she let out a loud guffaw, followed by a boisterous laugh that made his insides writhe in delight that he’d said something that was, in her opinion, funny.

“Fine, freaking fine,” she reached out with the hand that wasn’t propping her cheek aloft and slowly, he took it, pleased by her firm, businessmen’s shake. “Obviously, I’m your student-thief, thief-student, whichever you’d prefer, but call me Vex, yeah?”

“Vex,” he repeated with a slow nod. “My name is Pervical Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo the Third-“

Vex smiled inwardly, softly muttering: “-and you killed my father, prepare to die,” and Percy barely contained a proper laugh of his own. She caught this, a smug grin on her lips as she slowly drug herself into a proper sitting position. “So, Percy, shall we?” she motioned to the statistics book, his old statistics book, sitting in front of him.

He was about to object to the nickname, but he knew she’d only charm that off of him too.

It almost felt a little invasive, how quickly Vex’ah-Vex was whittling her way into his brain, plucking his ire, his personal nickname, and even his wits from him.

Gods. She was entirely quick on her feet, entirely maddening, entirely bewitching, entirely attractive, and a bit of a nerd.

He was entirely fucked.  

As fucked as he was, though, he did manage to aid Vex’ahlia in her homework for that week. Professor Hydris did love her extensive statistics programming, so most of their session was spent sitting side-by-side in front of Vex’ahlia’s very large laptop.

Percival forced his mind not to reflect on how very close they were to one another, nor did he let himself nervously tap his foot, afraid he’d bump her leg. He did, however, note the scent of her, unlike any other. There was a hint of spice to it, along with the scent of pine needles and freshly chopped hickory. It wasn’t like Keyleth, who usually, unintentionally whipped his face with her long, fiery mane when turning to tell him something. Keyleth smelled of flowers and earth, Vex smelled of secrets and woodlands.

As expected,  she was stubborn. Many times she’d stretch her arms out across the table and land her forehead against it with a thunk, like an ornery toddler, other times she’d moan and groan about until he pointedly jostled her back to attention. She listened though, well, most of the time, she did. At some points her eyes would wander, or she’d find something of interest in her hair, but he’d clear his throat and she’d be back with him.

After an hour, Percival decided, despite the initial theft, she wasn’t an asshole.

They’d only just gotten past the programming assignment before Vex’s phone buzzed from her phone. “Sorry, sorry,” she rolled her eyes as she caught his lifted, skeptical eyebrow. Snorting softly, she flipped open her phone. Percy watched her silently mouth the text as she read, suddenly alarmed as her expression broke into complete panic.

“I…fuck, I…I need to…” she stood up so abruptly that her chair flipped back, grabbing her bacg and looking around wildly. “Fuck!” she spat, slapping a hand to her brow, “Vax has the fucking bike I…”

Percival blinked a few times, wondering if there was merely another “Vax” in their university or if this was Keyleth’s “Vax.” No, no, no. This wasn’t the time to think of such things; she seemed to be in absolute shambles.

“Percy,” she whipped her gaze to him, a hopeful, relieved smile on her face that made him feel all too much.  She was looking at him like he was a goddamned miracle, like her life depended upon him and it felt like too much. “Do you have a bike, darling?” she squeezed her hands together, Percival startled to see them shaking.

“Ah…yes, I do,” he didn’t always feel like walking to class, after all, especially when he’d spent most of the night awake, pouring over old information in his closet. “Do you intend upon stealing it too?” he added, despite himself.

“No! I mean…maybe? Could you do me a huge favor? I mean I know we’ve only really just met but I really need a ride to the forest, like, right now,” she literally bounced on her feet, like a dog that really needed to relieve itself. “It’s an absolute emergency, could we..?”

“Say no more,” he said, surprised at how even his voice sounded. Percival quickly threw his long jacket on and threw his bag over his shoulder before leading the way from the library.

Luckily, his bike was chained up nearby. After Percy seated himself he paused, glancing over to Vex, who seemed to be taking in the bike with awe. He’d spent many, many hours on the bike, gathering pieces from various junkyards across town to create a brassy, vintage bike compiled of all styles of piping. It wasn’t sleek, nor was it conventionally beautiful, but he adored it.

“It was project,” he explained, clearing his throat as he patted the rear-rack behind him. “Hop on. I’ll need to know where we’re headed.”

He was entirely thankful that he could face away as she daintily sat side-saddle on the rear-rack, for the moment she slipped her thin arms around his waist, his cheeks flushed. He should be better mannered than this, more suave, but here he is, blushing like a schoolboy.

“Can we go?” Vex’s irritated voice brought him to the present and he bobbed his head.

“O-Of course. Where did you say we were headed?”

“The forest.”

And so he pedaled.

[ruthdemoofins]

Cor Tutor - Chapter 1/? - Perc’ahlia

When Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo the Third agrees to tutor a student for Professor Hydris’ statistics course, the last thing he expects to find is a witty, stubborn woman who’s not only completely intriguing on her own, but also has a handful of strange friends, including a giant bear and a terrifyingly protective older brother. Least of all, the last thing he expected was to find that she was the woman who’d approached him on the street the previous day, proclaiming him to be her boyfriend in front of her obsessive stalker, a man named Saundor.

Read on AO3: (X)

“I’m not meant to be here, brother. I should be out in those woods with Trinket, free as a bird,” her singsong voice and jazz hands only draw a groan from behind her. The skilled, brotherly hands braiding her hair grip into her locks and give a tug that evokes a yelp from Vex’ahlia. “Dick,” she mutters, crossing her arms tightly over her midriff in an ever-so-adult-like manner.

Vax'ildan only sighed, pursing his lips lightly, “When Syldor sent us here, he didn’t give a fuck what we made of ourselves, Vex’ahlia,” she cringes at the mention of their father, “He wanted us as far the fuck away from his new, perfect family as he could and I’m sure the last thing he expected us to do was get here, or at least, get you here.”

Admittedly, in the beginning, finding the footholds to attend university had been rough.  Vex and Vax had certainly made do with the deft hands they were born with, only running into the authorities on a few occasions. It’d taken a few years of hard (and often, illegal) work for them to find enough money to buy Vex'ahlia a place within the college and live a decently comfortable life in the meantime. They’d made do with the shitty financial aid offered to them and tried to ignore the fact that Syldor (the fuckhead) could’ve afforded to place them both within the university. Shitty fathers aside, Vex and Vax had rejoiced that they had the chance to make something of at least one of them, as one’s success was a shared happiness between the twins.

She’d always wanted to become a park ranger, ever since she was young. Vex'ahlia always wanted to protect the land that she’d grown up on, the rocks she’d scraped her knees on, the trees she’d learned to climb bare-footed. Most of all, she wanted to protect Trinket, but she’d never expected that she’d be sitting with goddamn statistics homework in front of her. She was studying environmental sciences, she should be in the sciences, not in complete duress over the mishmash of numbers and figures on the pages in front of her.

While, yes, Vex did quite enjoy Professor Hydris as a person and would love to get her completely head-over-heels wasted sometime, she did not enjoy the way she drew up horrifyingly confusing equations on the board. She definitely did not enjoy how most of the class seemed to understand it, while she struggled to resist the urge to flip her desk and scream.

“I don’t get it, brother. What the everloving fuck does this have to do with nature? It’s not like I’m going to be counting birds or some bullshit like that,” she moans, woefully passing the elastic band from her wrist to her brother as he gives her newly crafted braid a tug.

“Dunno,” he shrugs, quickly tying off her hair. He expertly hops to his feet, walking across the living-room/kitchen/bedroom of their small, shared flat to check his mobile. “What I do know is that Shaun’s expecting me and I don’t want to be late,” he tells her, rolling his eyes as her face furls in delight at the mention of Shaun. “Oh, Gilmore,” she sighs dreamily, resting her cheek against her clasped hands as she bats her lashes. “Of course you can’t leave Gilmore waiting, can you?” she coos, haphazardly nudging her statistics book away from her with her foot.

“Drop the shit, Stubby,” Vax’ildan huffs, jerking on his black pea-coat (the coat is so sulky and moody; completely perfect for Vax, in her opinion), “It’s work. Don’t fuck around with school, okay? You’ll work it out. You’re fucking stubborn, but you’re smart,” he walks over and leans down to press a kiss upon Vex’s head. “Try tutoring or some shit, yeah? They offer it for free. You know how we feel about freebies.”

Vex hides a smile under her hand as she rubs her nose, nodding compliantly, “Free shit is always good. Get out of here, give your boyfriend a kiss for me, all right?”

Vax stiffens at that, pausing to flick her forehead with his forefinger before expertly dancing away from the rebutting swing of her fist. He grabs the keys to his bike-chain and gives them twirl, shooting Vex a stern glare, “He’s not my boyfriend, twit.”

“Oh, is it Keyleth now? You’re so adorably bi, brother,” Vex grins ear to ear as her brother manages to cringe down into his jacket, so hesitant to talk about his relationships with her, his sister. The travesty of it all!

“What it is isn’t your goddamn business, yeah?” he shoots her a wide-eyed look of faux-annoyance (or maybe it is real, she doesn’t know)  before he’s out the door, leaving her to her misery.

Gilmore’s her favorite, really. When they were barely scraping by on the little money Syldor left them, literally taking free-samples from the grocery store for fucking dinner, Gilmore found her brother, offered him work. Of course, it wasn’t all entirely legal, but Gilmore was known for his merchandise, entirely legal or not. Though he acted it, the man wasn’t much older than them as it was (Vex'ahlia was quite the elderly junior), and he was glorious, as marketed. His sonorous tone and grand motions always had her on her toes, and not to mention the way he could make Vax blush. It was all too good.

He’d kept Vex doing some “recon work” for him, as he called it, but every so often, she’d tag along with her brother. They were always at their best when they worked together, but Vax had gone solo after she’d been dragged into uni.

She didn’t regret it, though, the uni part. She did, however, feel a horrible amount of guilt for Vax’ildan’s sacrifice. He claimed it made him happy, that their mum would’ve wanted this, but it was at his expense, really.

She knew Vax wasn’t a college kid, knew he’d get sick of all the curriculum bullshit and the pushing, but he did seem happy to be working for Gilmore, seemed happy to be around her friends from school (especially Keyleth).

Reverie wasn’t going to finish this horrible studying, though. With a grumble, Vex’ahlia flipped open her well-worn, brick of a laptop, pulling up her statistic class’s homepage to inquire about tutoring.

She fucking hated the idea of it, but at this point, the book seemed to be in an entire different language and she wasn’t going to waste Vax’s money on a shit semester.

On the bright side, it gave her the chance to communicate with the one and only Zahra Hydris (they would totally be best friends by the end of the semester).

“Percy, darling?”

Pervical Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo the Third, jerked his head up from the book he’d been devouring (mentally, of course), feeling a lurch of impending doom as he spotted Professor Hydris at the edge of the table he occupied.

This certainly wasn’t going to be good. Not only had Zahra found him outside of class hours, but she’d found him in his secluded corner of the library with a smile on her face that was anything but hopeful for him. Still, he wasn’t entirely sure he’d ever seen a smile on Professor Hydris’ face that offered any form of good fortune. She was the type of woman whom held a smile that was more of a baring of teeth, not exactly friendly, not exactly promising. He recalled freshmen spreading rumors that she’d had her incisors sharpened on purpose, though Zahra probably started that rumor herself.

She did love to terrify freshmen and Percy couldn’t object to that particular practice.

“Can I help you, Professor Hydris?” Mentally, he sorted through what he’s done lately. He was flying through her Research Methods course with bravado, he hadn’t fallen asleep in the student lounge for thirty-four hours since last year (he’d not slept an entire three days from working on studies of his own and studies for school before that particular hibernation) and he certainly hadn’t started a fire in the science center’s lab since freshman year.

Zahra’s smile eases up a bit at the hesitation in his voice, planting one hand on his occupied table and the other on her hip, “Remember when I said I’d forget that you fell asleep in class if you’d tutor for me in the beginning of the semester?” she questions.

“…Yes.”

“Remember when I said I’d probably never need to use you as a tutor anyway, so it was a…gracious deal…?” she winced lightly.

Ah.

Percy didn’t even remember how she’d convinced him into that in the first place. The idea of holding the slimmest chance of tutoring someone, someone who was entirely capable of being an asshole…How had she convinced him into that, anyway? She’d probably humbled him to the point of accepting without even quite realizing, damn her.

She takes his pause as the opportunity to continue, giving a soft huff of amusement, “It appears our patron-saint of tutoring is absolutely swamped,” Professor Hydris tuts softly, momentarily glancing about, probably for freshmen to terrify (they do call her the Dragon for a reason), before returning her piercing blue eyes to Percy. “Anyway, on top of her normal studies, Miss Trickfoot is well over her head with students to tutor and I was hoping you could take on just one student for me?” again, she winces lightly as she asks this, as if she understands the sacrifice it’ll require for him to actually mentor someone.

Percy does have plenty of free time this semester, admittedly. Enough for him to tinker, at least. The idea of mentoring a stranger, a potential asshole, spikes his nerves, but still, if it means he’s on her good side, it means he could get away with a few more naps after sleep-deprived nights of plotting. “I suppose I could,” he says. It might not be so bad, really. He’s not one to attempt to meet new people; meeting his only friend in the entire school, Keyleth, had been at her own expense, but he might as well have a go. This stranger/potential asshole might even be of use to him.

“Oh, good,” Zahra sighs, as though a weight has been lifted from her shoulders. She sinks into the seat across from him, rummaging through her messenger bag for a moment. “Her name is Vex’ahlia. A third year student in stats. I don’t know why, but apparently she’s required to take my course, even though she’s aiming to become a park ranger. Haven’t a clue what she’ll use it for, besides organizing a study on birds or something, but she reached out to me this morning, completely at a loss on what she’s looking at,” she explains, sliding a sheet of paper over to Percy. “Her number and email are there, I’ll leave the meeting times to you.”

Percy slides the paper closer with his index finger, nodding his head in response to Zahra where needed as she speaks.

“If she’s absolutely done for, let me know, but she’s a firebrand, at least from the few times she’s asked me for help,” Hydris wears a fond grin on her lips, eyes glossing over. Percy can’t imagine Zahra being anything but a firebrand at his age, probably had a chain of men behind her, to boot (he quickly wipes that particular mental image from his mind).

“I’ll contact her and see what I can do to help,” he assures, folding the paper and tucking it in the breast-pocket of his shirt.

“Thank you,” for the first time, she has an honest-to-Gods smile on her lips as she looks over to him. Percy can’t help but wonder if he’s truly been initiated as a senior now that he’s earned a smile from Zahra Hydris, but before he can ask aloud, Zahra is standing up and bidding him a good afternoon, bustling down towards the stairs.

Percy considered texting Vex'ahlia then and there, but the moment he flipped opened his ancient mobile, he was distracted by the array of texts from Keyleth, all including a ridiculously appropriate amount of emojis for her personality, and Cassandra, who was hoping that he could pick up dinner from their favorite takeout place.

He’d set up a meeting time later, he supposed. For now, he’d sit, read and pretend that he had no pending judgement to make on Vex'ahlia (still a potential asshole).

A buzz from his phone had him opening it again with a heavy, weary sigh, noting Keyleth had texted him, again (she’s a mother hen and he should expect this, he supposes).

“I’m coming to find you to bestow bagels upon you :)”

He hardly has time to sigh again, mourning the loss of a quiet afternoon of reading before Keyleth is approaching him, one arm precariously holding two sealed cups of what he’s hoping is coffee and the other, a bag of the apparent bagels-to-be.

She nearly spills both as she sinks down into the seat adjacent from him with a loud sigh, dropping the cups towards him and thankfully, it is coffee (how she doesn’t mind the scalding heat against her bare arms is unknown to him, but her dedication to cutting the sleeves off of everything she owns is admirable).

“So, Vax and me talked again,” she tells him with a bob of her head. The look on her face isn’t exactly confident, though Keyleth isn’t very confident to begin with, and Percy knows he’ll be here awhile.

Honestly, he’d never tell anyone, but he’s a little happier to spend the afternoon sitting, listening and pretending that he has no pending judgement to make on Vex'ahlia (the potential asshole).

So I got this idea in my head a week ago and it was like Scanlan sang me a sweet, sweet song about myself for inspiration dice or something because I am totally in love with writing this.

Anyway, I’m not entirely familiar with environmental science majors and I’m sure they don’t actually take statistics, but I also know that colleges love to put you in classes that aren’t your major and then blame you when…yaddayaddayadda. But yeah, don’t expect this to be 100% accurate for a legitimate park ranger hopeful.

Trigger-wise, I don’t think anything majorly /bad/ will be happening in this fic besides the whole stalking aspect. If that changes, I will leave a warning for sure.

As for the use of uber italics with Vex, it’s just how I hear her voice in my head and with Vax and Kiki and Gilmore, welp, who knows what that lil raven rascal will choose?

This is my first Critical Role fic and I’ve no beta, so please tell me how I’m doing! x