#bite the remote | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

basilthemilkaddict · 8 months ago

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“WAS THAT THE BITE OF 87?!”

Lmao rip Grassy

REBLOG MY ART! I WANT OTHERS TO SEE IT!/NF OFC!!!:DDDDD

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non-plutonian-druid · 7 months ago

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[ID: Drawings of the TUA Paranatural AU, mostly of the Sparrows. Alphonso and Sloane are both adults, wearing matching red and black suits. Both of them are spectrals, as indicated by the spectral energy rising off of them.

Marcus about twelve, the same as the majority of the Hargreeves. He is posing dramatically and wearing a polo shirt and khakis.

Fei and Jayme are both about 17, and are both vampires. Fei is wearing platform boots and an all-black outfit with a sheer skirt, and Fei is wearing a baseball tee and UFO pants.

The last image is of Umbrella Ben and Sparrow Ben. Umbrella Ben is a ghost, and looks about twelve. Sparrow Ben is alive, and a similar age to Fei and Jayme. End ID.]

I have decided what to do with the sparrows!

Alphonso and Sloane both work for the Commission on spirit-wrangling or whatever it is the commission does. They're a bit younger than Five (Sloane is 22, Alphonso is 20), and are roughly equivalent to Agent Day, for anyone familiar with the original comic. Basically, theyre there to snoop.

Marcus has some kind of band kid rivalry with Viktor. I don't know enough about band to determine what it is, but rest assured that they are very passionate about it.

Paranatural has vampires in it! I don't know what the deal is with vampires in paranatural so i wasn't going to include any, but specifically Fei and Jayme as vampires won me over. They probably spend their time trying to kill sparrow Ben.

Umbrella Ben and Sparrow Ben are both in this au! They're twins :)

#tua #the umbrella academy #ben hargreeves #sparrow ben #sparrow academy #alphonso hargreeves #sloane hargreeves #marcus hargreeves #fei hargreeves #jayme hargreeves #christopher is a cube so i did not include him #also important note: sparrow ben cannot see ghosts #hes just a normie being victimized by vampires #this wouldnt be any fun otherwise #paranatural au #i really should just bite the bullet and make that the tag #i still havent come up with a good name #extranatural is kind of fun but also doesnt remotely explain itself #my art #also i split up the sparrow teams on purpose #i thought making them cooperate with other people for a change would be good for them #actual reason is bc only fei and only jayme were fun vampires to me #and also asshole and soft girl has more potential for fun interactions w the main cast than asshole and asshole #alphonso can make friends with a vampire later down the line #extranatural

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icewindandboringhorror · 24 days ago

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Recent-ish things ~

#photo diary #1 - love this image of Noodle.. such a weird angle that makes his head look entirely round like a puff ball or something #2 - a more recent (still from months ago) collection of my pressed flowers and 4 leaf clovers I found.#3. Being one of the only people in 2024 still going 'hee heee I've just bought a new wii game!' but.. I have. >:3 #It's kind of like Wii Sports Resort but is like.. open world? so your character can actually walk around and stuff. REALLY makes me #wish I had the type of set up where I could record video from my wii and stuff like some gaming youtubers have. I think it'd be a really #fun game to play on video and to DOCUMENT it!!! I keep wishing I could screenshot my little guy walking around but I caaant..#I've literally just been taking out my phyiscal camera and photographing the screen which always looks bad.. augh..#4. Something in the froxen food aisle called 'Wellington Bites' a play on beef wellington. suprisingly good actually. but I guess anything #with like beef and mushrooms usually is. But it seems like.. oddly decent for frozen food stuff.#5 - boye looking Round again.. 6 - updated score in the wii fit minigame again. This time less than 4 seconds #for each round? which may be a record for me? 7 & 8 - fat bird in the snow. fatt bird in the SNOW!! Hoping that climate change and H5N1 #don't eventually remove all trace of birds and winter weather from my life in the future... -_-#9 - ..ough... a few paltry writings.. Except for the one day of 4000 words. But for the most part I have been making soo litte progress #because of the holidays and drs appointments and such a rush of all these other mind distracting things.. Or if I'm not doing something the #I'm feeling tired from having PREVIOUSLY done something so I waste the whole day being sleepy and headachey... GRR...#the funny thing is that like many many years ago I wrote a note on my wall saying 'FOCUS! write 2hr a day or more or youre going to finish #your game in 2025!!!' - which back in 2018 when I wrote it was like unimaginably far into the future but now... ahem.. hem... I guess that #is quite literally the case LOL. To my credit I did parctically abandon it entirely since late 2019 and JUST now picked up really #trying to focus on it in mid 2024 but still... My '''ridiculous'' projection being actually likely the correct one..#10 - I just thoughtit would be silly to put a bunch of keychain things on the wii remote. imagine playing this way. getting constantly #jabbed in the hand by plastic bits. and the jingling clinking noise it would be always making lol #11 - sky.. huzzah for the sky as always. Clouds my beloved #Gr.. I just really want to wriiite. My new years hopes are to finish my game and to get stuff set up to start selling sculptures again.#AND then maybe do more game videos lol... I miss playing games. I dont think I've posted on that youtube for like 5 months #I've just had so much appointments and Things and Stuff and focusing so much on other projects. But that is the thing that really #feels relaxing and fun for me. so like.. 1. finish game 2. sell sculpture/make sculpture 3. play games 4. find more friends #and social connection and networking or whatever the hell people have to do to be successful 5. do more costume/outfits.#<( saying this all on a day where I did none of those things LOL... I got erm.. maybe 400 words done today.. >:'3c )#6 is MOVE away from the evil west coast (hot.. fires in summer. etc) but like. not happening unless I suddenly become a millionaire so. -_-

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not-frosty · 2 years ago

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“I HATE BEING TURNED INTO MODELING CLAY”

decided to make fanny on a whim to give remote a friend, and also bc shes my 3rd fav in tee pot :D

she does Not appear to enjoy the baking part, some might even say she greatly dislikes it…

(ALSO hi!!1!1!! ill get to drawing more of yalls requests soon ;; ive been a bit busy these past few days! i cant promise that i can do all of em but im tryin)

#tpot fanny #bfb fanny #tpot remote #bfb remote #death pact again #bfb #tpot #bfdi #polymer clay #I LIKE HOW THIS TURNED OUT A LOT #i want to chew on her like aggnanrrggrgrgrngggagr #gnaw gnaw gnaw #why are you so bite sized #froperfart

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plasterhound · 3 months ago

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.

#??????????????????#????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????#i dont know what to doooooooooooo i dont know what to do w my life.....#i dont wanna go to college im way too stupid for that and also its insane like #im scared i dont like anything enough to make it worth it. not even biology #thats like 5 years idk and i fucking hate school.... i think id kill myself if i had to go back to somerhing remotely similar #idk thats scary.....#my plan b was getting a job and i rlly tried but im a pussy . i only started to go out and do stuff like last year. and im an adult !!#i feel like i fucked something up at some point in my life cuz like this is insane #im stuck in limbo. like theres something wrong and its not the autism #bites a cinderblock bites a cinderblock #man im so fucking scared everyday i feel like im going insane . i cant even imagine me doing anything #theres something wrong w me cuz thats like not normal . i dont wanna die in my bed but everything else scares me #fucked up if true #uh #vent #its funny af tagging my posts w vent but i tag them so u can block them or whatever #FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK IF ONLY REDBULL ACTUALLY DID SHIT TO ME . THEN ID BE FIXED #FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKKKKKKKKKKK I JUST WANT AN ENERGY DRINK THAT WORKS PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE PLEASE GOD #PLEASE PEKASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

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thereareeyesinsidethetrees · 5 months ago

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stan: hey, you mind grabbing me a mug?

dipper: yeah, okay

stan: not that one, that’s ford’s

dipper: what? how can you tell? they all look the same

stan: check the rim

dipper: …are those teeth marks

stan: yep

dipper: …in the ceramic?

stan: at this point, i’m amazed he hasn’t worn down his teeth yet. but yeah, that one’s ford’s

#ford has that thing where something gets even remotely near his mouth and he just goes CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP #that includes his teeth being in his mouth. they also trigger that reaction #stan will be falling asleep on the stan o’ war ii and just hear a quiet clackclackclackclackclack from the top bunk #hey did they have those rubber pencil things back in the early 60s? or somethin similar?#the ones they give to you in early elementary school when you blaze through your pencil so that you stop biting it #(maybe you shouldn’t have made the thin-paint-covered wood so delectable in biting texture did you think about that)#anyway. if they did ford absolutely got the disgusting rubber pencil-biting-determent treatment when he was a kid

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magniloquent-raven · 9 months ago

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yall mfers need to stop

#gay characters written with a straight audience in mind are a thing im not denying that #like 95% of one-off queer storylines in the early 2000s were just #''hello i am a gay. i have just enough personality to pass as human in the eyes of the audience.#now let me explain why you should treat me like a person''#but my god have people taken this phrase and run all the way into hell with it #if i see one more person saying heartstopper is for straight people im gonna start biting throats out #it was created by a queer person first of all #and second of all they did not write an entire subplot about there being no age limit on discovering who you are #for STRAIGHT PEOPLE #that wasn't for them!! it was for all the people in their 30s who watched the first season #and cried their eyes out because they were seeing all the things they never got to have #im so tired yall #i stg any queer media that's even remotely lighthearted or optimistic #is immediately called ''sanitized'' or rejected as some fantasy aimed at straight ppl who dont want to deal with harsh realities #when that just isnt fair at all #also side note the post i saw that prompted me to make this also put ''pretty much all queer media made in asia'' on the list #of queer media for straights #which. feels racist.#i really dont have much of a frame of reference for queer anime/kdramas/cdramas etc. but the generalization feels sketchy #idk man i feel like there's a certain segment of the community who will just say anything they dont like is not For Us #like just because it isn't for YOU doesnt meant no one in the community can relate to/enjoy it ffs

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byanyan · 9 months ago

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byan being sick but refusing to go to the doctor so you gotta lie to them, say you're gonna take 'em to claire's so they'll get in the car in that same way you'd tell a dog you're gonna take them to the park in order to get them to the vet

#then u gotta wrangle them into a blanket burrito like u would a cat so they can't scratch u while u carry them inside all hissing & growling #they can still bite tho so be v careful about putting any part of ur body too close to their face #then they're gonna be mad at u for like a week afterward so. have fun with that too lmao #they're a petty bitch when they're mad at someone ok....... gonna hide all ur remotes & replace ur sugar w salt #clog ur sink with glitter and maybe break a window if they're feeling really spicy #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ shitpost ⋮ bold of you to assume i've reached peak dumbass.

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butch-with-a-deep-voice · 1 year ago

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Argument 1: Lucifer was the most beautiful of all the angels

Argument 2: The most beautiful people I've ever met are trans

Conclusion: Lucifer is trans

#trans people are God's favourites #i say this like im even remotely Christian #bite me #queer #trans #transgender #nonbinary

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itwasmagic · 7 months ago

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need the world to heal and bring back the vampire fiction obsession 😞

#cannot for the life of me find a spicy vampire romantasy that sounds even remotely good and isn't written in first person #first person pov are my enemy #give me blood!!!!!!! bite each other damn it!!!!!#if only i got shitty 300 chapter vampire books advertised to me the way i seem to get a/b/o ones

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bonestrouslingbones · 21 days ago

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now realizing that i haven't seen an edgepuff fic any longer than a oneshot since fucking. 2022. and not even a oneshot since 2023. god.

#I CAN'T KEEP MAKING MY OWN FOOD WHEN I ONLY GET MOTIVATION TWICE A YEAR AND BURNT OUT FOR THE REST. SOMEBODY ELSE DO IT PLEASEEEEEEEEEE #coffee shop mafia au fic that i stopped commenting on bc of burnout pls come back................i miss u so bad...........................#sigh. it doesn't help that with selfcest fics ao3 search is borderline unusable i'm not gonna lie #click on any tag that even remotely specifies what ship it is and get sent to the papyrus/papyrus tag. its all spicyhoney now fuck you #then even if u grab the search function by the neck and force it to specify the actual ship nobody tags their shit consistently 😭😭#sometimes it's the actual word edgepuff by itself. sometimes it's edgepuff - relationship. sometimes it's Ut Papyrus/Uf Papyrus - Freeform #sometimes it's undertale papyrus/underfell papyrus. sometimes it's papyrus/underfell papyrus #all of these tags need to be manually typed out in the additional tags filter and you can only search one at a time #but no matter which tag it is the most recent fic is a 1 chapter smutfic from 2023 by someone who primarily writes fontcest #sometimes i hate my ability to happily sustain myself without needing anything new. things would be so simple if i could just Move On #alas if i had the ability to lose interest in things due to lack of content i would have left the undertale fandom by like 2018 #and well. happy new year #i kinda failed at my resolution to get more cringe on the normal blog last year tbh. maybe i should go even harder now to make up for it #i gotta talk about the intricacies of edge wanting to get dicked down by russ in the middle of snowdin forest on main. for my health #a full essay about russ's biting kink and why it makes their ship a whole different level of complex and compelling 2 me....i can dream

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foldingfittedsheets · 1 year ago

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My betrothed: Do you ever think about how there’s just a little guy in our house that roams around, screaming?

Me, watching the asshole in question jump onto the windowsill to chew on the curtains: I guess.

Me betrothed: It’s true. He runs around and bites us. That little guy.

#ramblies #my betrothed #Korben is just the worst cat #we expected our cat sitter to tell us how abominable he was when we were gone but he was apparently not remotely interested in her #no screaming or biting or anything #so now we definitely know he harasses us out of love

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imhumanguysiswear · 2 years ago

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Camila introduced Vee to documentaries, and Vee made them her favorite thing to watch

Before they were something Camila would put on sometimes when she was bored and there was nothing else to watch or Luz wasn’t using the Tv

Now when night comes the Tv is Vee property, always with a new documentary or a rewatch of her favorites, it’s pretty much a ritual before going to bed: dinner, documentary and sleep

And nobody is willing to argue with a basilisk for the remote rights

#the remote is hers and she will bite #the owl house #vee noceda #camila noceda #vee the basilisk #toh vee #vee toh #vee

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lord-shitbox · 4 months ago

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person i defintely dont have a crush on likes bl do i start drawing men kissing in class now is that anything is that what i do with this information

#shitboxposting #is this funny to watch. like even remotely. i feel extremely stupid.#i left csp open to the bite and bark making out on the floor image and nearly shit myself in class but like uhhh if they saw it.......#its over basically. going to go watch the film they said they like and im going to lay down and die if i dont manage to talk to them on wed

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lannisterdaddyissues · 7 months ago

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Having a mission impossible movie night w my father, and as someone who was obsessed w the outsiders and the mighty ducks in middle school, it causes me great grief to see emilio estevez be crushed by that elevator after having him be so handsome for only like ten minutes 😭😭😭

(I never got around to watching all the movies after I watched this one a year-ish ago so this time I’ll actually make some progress on my watch through 🙏🙏)

OMG BESTIE ALEX IS WATCHING MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE THE FRANCHISE FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME???!?!?!! HUGE IF TRUE BIG DAY FOR ME COMMON MAR W I NEVER LOSE ETC ETC YOU GET THE POINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hope you enjooooyy and tell ur dad hi for me /j

#‘another one bites the dust’ plays as i gleefully add another title to the neverending list of fandoms we share 🥰💖#(i expect to see u back in my inbox as soon as u finish the franchise btw xoxo)#also hiiii alex i missed u in my inbox so much. how have u been i hope life is treating u absolutely spectacularly 🫶🫶#oh and . bc im now word vomiting in the tags #just as a caveat none of the movies r even remotely the same bc they’re all directed by different guys #also i feel u abt emilio estevez so hard but it’s ok bc at least there’s still traumatized punk twink tom cruise <3

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sunset-bridge · 1 year ago

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what do you guys mean just . traumadumping to people you met like 2 months ago isnt normal . stop dont do this to me. stop laughing at goro hes literally so normal . stopp oh my god this isnt happening. if hes anything like me he went back home and immeadiatly was like. what the fuck was wrong with me why did i say that. well.

#i get it. i would also need to kill joker after that #yeah i did this. multiple times HES NORMAL i dont get it #why are u guys laughing this is normal behavior im going to bite a wall. am i socially inept (yes)#me when the. me when someone acts remotely friendly with me for more than a week. congratulations you have unlocked the extended jorge lore #HELP im going to. go insane i should bury myself in sand

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