#birthday cake stand tesco

[suhajoarts]

A birthday cake stand is more than just a practical item for holding a cake; it's a centerpiece that adds elegance and a touch of celebration to any birthday party. Traditionally, a birthday cake is the highlight of the event, and presenting it on a stand elevates its significance, literally and figuratively. The stand serves both aesthetic and functional purposes, enhancing the visual appeal while providing stability and ease of cutting and serving the cake.

Cake stands come in a variety of designs, materials, and sizes, catering to different tastes and themes. Common materials include glass, porcelain, metal, and acrylic. Each material has its unique charm: glass stands offer a timeless, delicate look; porcelain stands often feature intricate designs and a classic feel; metal stands, particularly those made of stainless steel or with ornate details, add a touch of sophistication; and acrylic stands are modern, lightweight, and versatile.

Design-wise, cake stands range from simple, single-tier platforms to elaborate multi-tiered structures. A single-tier stand is perfect for showcasing a single-layer cake or a smaller confection, while a multi-tiered stand is ideal for displaying larger or multiple cakes, cupcakes, or other treats. Some stands even come with decorative elements like beads, ribbons, or flowers, which can be customized to match the party’s theme or color scheme.

Using a cake stand also has practical benefits. It elevates the cake, making it easier to cut and serve without bending down or reaching across a table. This elevation helps keep the cake stable, preventing it from sliding or tipping over during the party. Additionally, a cake stand can help protect the cake from accidental spills or mishaps by keeping it above the main table surface.

Beyond birthdays, cake stands are versatile pieces that can be used for various occasions, such as weddings, anniversaries, and other celebrations. They can also serve as elegant displays for pastries, fruit arrangements, or even as decorative centerpieces on dining tables.

In conclusion, a birthday cake stand is a worthwhile investment for anyone who loves to celebrate special occasions with style and flair. Its ability to enhance both the presentation and practicality of serving a cake makes it an essential item for memorable birthday celebrations.

[indigosunsetao3]

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZPRE4g6YQ/

Okay but look at this 😭😫👏🏻❤️🥺🥹 it’s such husband behavior and I could see all the 141 guys doing this tbh. Maybe except Price (I feel like he’d go to the ends of the Earth to find one and would be successful. Even if it means driving 2+hrs to every Tesco trying to find the cake)

What? Stop it right now. This is too cute.

Just doing read more because it's a bit long to list them all. All are SFW and fluffy. 💙

Price for sure is going to every. single. store. He's going to find this cake one way or another; he won't come home until he's got it. He loses count of how many places he tries. He makes store managers call other stores to see if they have it in stock, watching them from the counter with narrowed eyes. When he tracks down the last one, which is another hour away, he asks the store to set it aside and pays them double when he arrives for their effort (and to apologize for slightly threatening them if they sold it to someone else). Traditions are important to him and he'll be damned if he misses a year. "I know it's almost midnight dear, but it's still technically your birthday. Never mind where I've been all day, not important."

Soap is making a masterpiece. Baking may not be his forte per se but man is artistic. His creation is a variation of all the different caterpillar cakes; selecting only the best qualities from each. And yes, he looked and studied them all. He has pictures of them all over the kitchen counter with notes on each about what he likes and doesn't like. Then he sketches out his own picture and uses it as a blueprint for his design, proudly naming it Craig.

"Clyde's eyes are terrifying, bonnie. But I didn't like how Chris didn't have feet...they have to have feet or then it's a snake. And Morris was boring, not enough stripes."

Gaz is in the kitchen for hours baking. He's bought everything he needs in bulk because he knows it's going to be a learning curve. He ends up with multiple failures, that he'll take to the team to devour, before finally getting it right. By the time he finishes, the kitchen is a disaster—every pan, bowl, plate, and pot (yes pot, he ran out of clean bowls) is dirty by the time he finishes. And flour? It's everywhere, his hair, clothes, the cat. "Stay out of the kitchen. Just sit here and enjoy this...I'll be back in a bit. If you see the cat just brush him off for me, yeah?"

Ghost enlists Soap to help him. It ends up with a bunch of arguing about how to do it. They fight over where to put the milk chocolate decorative pieces, the proper spacing of the eyes, the size of the feet and every other little imperfection Ghost can find. Soap eventually leaves telling Ghost to do it himself...before coming back thirty minutes later to help him finish. It's a bit lumpy and there are little slashes where it had been pulled apart and resealed with chocolate icing like glue from Ghost's attempts to get it perfect. "It's a bit beat up, sorry love. Tried to make it perfect for you, now it looks like he's been to war with all the scars."

Bonus:

Alex, poor soul, had no idea this kind of cake was even a thing at first. He assumed a caterpillar cake was just a sheet cake with the Very Hungry Caterpillar on it until you explained. Once he knows what it is, you get a caterpillar cake every year; he doesn't care that shipping costs three times as much as the cake itself. But this year the shipment runs late and he has to call in backup...which involves Gaz going to the shops to sweet talk the little old lady bakers for their recipe while Alex frantically takes notes. He only has a few hours to get it together and while he does his best...it's the thought that counts right? At least it tastes like it's supposed to.

"I know it's not Colin but if you squint hard enough it's vaguely a caterpillar....really squint, maybe cover one eye, and stand back a few feet. I promise your real one is on its way, just had a bit of delay."

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Two Word Fic Titles (2) Masterlist

part one

7 Minutes (ao3) - saraswords

Summary: "Moments, memories, that’s all that Dan had left to relive, but he could only pick a handful. He only had 7 minutes after-all. So…he picked. He chose his favorites, a compilation of small and big moments: lying in bed together, moving in together, slow dancing, life-changing questions, and simple nights.

And what they all had in common, was one person..."

Advent Calender (ao3) - Phantje

Summary: Phil is a renown children's TV presenter. He is probably the only one that is always enthusiastic to leave his house for work. Talking, baking and crafting - his life is amazing. Dan is a single father. His son's mother left two weeks after the best thing in Dan's life was born. With the support of his family and best friend, Dan tries to be the best parent ever. That isn't easy when you have to juggle unemployment alongside all the important parent duties. Two lifes that don't seem to have a lot in common collide. Causing all sort of change.

Bardic Inspiration (ao3) - dickiegreenleaf

Summary: Dan is a travelling bard looking for a safe place for him and his beloved horse to spend the night. Thankfully, the local tavern owner, Phil, can offer him one.

Better Off (ao3) - tellsfromhale

Summary: Dan's relationship with his family has been getting better, but when his mum drops the bomb that she's seeing someone and wants Dan to meet him, Dan doesn't know how to handle it.

birthday cake (ao3) - possumdnp

Summary: Dan is back home from tour just in time for Phil’s birthday.

And it just wouldn’t be a birthday without a slightly questionable cake.

Blossoming Buds (ao3) - inchresting_ideas

Summary: Phil wants flowers. He also may have bought a very Dan bouquet on accident... Guess he has to figure out how to give his best friend a giant bouquet platonically now

break free (ao3) - wiccamoody

Summary: Dan is a competitor on the first season of RuPaul's Drag Race UK.

Climb Down - jestbee

Summary: Dan is three stories up while Phil is below, shouting to each other across the distance. He feels likes he is trapped up here in his tower, waiting for someone to rescue him, perhaps.

Dearest, Dearest (ao3) - QuietBubbles

Summary: A collection of love letters written during the Great War between two young soldiers. Hope you enjoy! <3

Elastic Heart (ao3) - goldfishsunglasses

Summary: Dan Howell, age 19, and Phil Lester, age 28, meet online and enter into an “arrangement”, with Phil acting as a sugar daddy to a much younger Dan. They get along great, and the sex is phenomenal, but what happens what that stops being enough? Follow them through a whirlwind year as they dance the fine line between what is acceptable, and what they really want.

familiar faces (ao3) - watergator

Summary: there's a handsome tesco delivery man standing in phil's doorway and he can't figure out where he recognises him from. until he does

Golden Boy (ao3) - hygge

Summary: Phil takes a drawing class in university and needs a subject for his drawing final.

House Sitter (ao3) - Doesyourhusbandknowtheway

Summary: Dan Howell's parents are going on a 12 day vacation and refuse to let their sixteen year old son stay home alone for that long. They hire Phil, a nineteen year old boy from the neighborhood to stay at the house with Dan and to keep an eye on things. Who knew 12 days (and Phil Lester) could completely change Dan Howell's life?

japhan 3.0 (ao3) - danhoweiis

Summary: snapshots of the japhan trip 2023

keep quiet (ao3) - calvinahobbes

Summary: This feels indulgent in a way he hasn’t felt in a while. He’s tired after a night of being social, tallying up points and arguing with Phil and their friends about which countries had the best Eurovision songs, booing and complaining when their favorite didn’t win. And he’s sweaty from sleeping in close quarters. But he can’t bring himself to stop the building arousal between them.

linger on (ao3) - dizzy, waveydnp

Summary: A recent loss has ground Phil's life to a halt. At 33, he's static in his grief and living in the house he grew up in - until his mother kicks him out.

In a fit of indignation and with nothing to lose, he answers the first listing he finds for a room to rent in London... a listing posted by a guy named Dan.

Pumpkin Pride (ao3) - ThoughtaThought

Summary: Phil's family runs a Pumpkin Patch on the outskirts of a small town. The Howells move into the house next door (but this is the country, so it's like... half a mile away) and Dan grows up hanging out with the Lesters. Each chapter is a moment in their life as they grow up and get together with absolutely zero angst. From 1996-2023.

Ridingstone Hall (ao3) - QuietBubbles

Summary: The turn of the 20th century. Much to his surprise, Daniel, an ordinary orphan, secures a position as tutor to an affluent family in the country. However, this stroke of luck soon runs short as he is thrust into a world eternally on the brink of scandal. Warring parents, unhappy children-and the eldest son, miserably engaged to a socialite, soon begins a beautiful secret scandal of his own…

Third Degree (ao3) - sierraadeux

Summary: Dan sets fires. Phil puts them out.

Too Hot - jilliancares

Summary: Dan gets dragged to a party he doesn’t want to go to and then dragged into playing a game he doesn’t want to play. He can only hope that he won’t end up having to kiss Phil Lester, who he hates more than slow internet.

[mydyspraxiablog]

As Dyspraxia it very hard because Stafford Town can be very selfshire at times.

Today went dancing 💃 in Prue gym in Stafford and Then going New Northfield centre art and It crouse I want enrolled Care on Monday to Lower Drayton farm but trying feeling in form but won't send to Care and Nattion insurance number but have no mobie phone so once again thanks scarm back to square one asking mum to get PIP letter and bring new Northfield centre but too busy help spet father in the garden help me knew spet family come first before first born.

It embarrassed asking people ring mum up because havn't got mobie phone but today got own back and do again.

Sick of ask mum for money and havn't got mobie phone so went shop because lemon juice run out smell brun so wait turn of oven off because got fear of oven blow up on me I don't cooking anymore even going on holiday to Turkey all can eat fruit and salad be Gluten free is no fun.

So mum just me if going turn oven off tell me you stupid child but if have mobie phone would be able tell her but havn't only got stupid monkey phone from Tesco won't use that know she change mind stuck with no mobie phone so when do Lower Drayton farm no way get in connection with me because this what scarm done.

I want get somethings for my sponderchild it my sponderchild birthday coming soon with Compassionuk and want send letter to Ethiopia but done in draft but always busy with something and tell off wait for Thursday of month but going holiday to Turkey 🇹🇷 again and want be send before going if have mobie phone I would be able get download compassion uk do letter and birthday card by post it take too long and don't want my sponderchild going without letters and her friends got them I having difficulty writing letter but always send them with paper gift inside.

Now other promble do send Dyspraxia membership form £25 to Dyspraxia foundation but mum won't let post won't give money buy stamp so be another row tomorrow Usly when rowing like this I would gone in the snug and look after Sydnee and Annabel but dead now and havn't be able come back to garden just see mum furtine in the snug and Cat shed upset 😡 and spend most day in my bedroom most day because noughting do Staffford anymore. I havn't got money thanks to scarms ruin my life it all going to mum as Adult kid got ask for pocket money. " I need paid rent"

Natwest isn't help not helpful bank at movements havn't got Mastercard any more so don't know how going Play EA plus games next year might have give them bank number do Dricit debit but really don't want do that. Amazon UK is mum Natwest card now with my account not happy person at movements wish moving out to Esscellshaw so can be with more cats all want be with more cats.

Natwest is been azzhold won't let do anymore stand order theath frozen my and mum account.

Then how can give birthday gift to sponsor child if stupid Natwest bank frozen account that Prue Gym and Compassion Uk and Staffordshire wildlife not paid and let them down as member and I don't want do that.

Really should phone up compassion uk help write letter from my draft letter to paper give me but even devil is stop with Natwest bank stop money going compassion uk 🇬🇧 I would write cheque and post 📫 if become that way but take long might receive the birthdays gift later and I don't want that.

Know life isn't fair at movements but got fear control me movements and two voices in my head.

I bit scare going shopping now because havn't any money 💰 and worry if miss the Taxi because stuck on bus going another way there no way connects both Taxi and Lower Drayton farm.

Don't get me wrong love Stafford Town going Victoria Park even if can't going coffee in new cafe but isn't Gluten free food so can't going in some eles missing out.

I know what like not have birthday cake when going family doing all birthday cakes but not Gluten free food have eat Gluten free sweet under table so Newphew and Nieces don't see them even on my birthday get birthday cake but can't eat because wheat have cut all birthday cake give to the family going without no fun living with mum and can't going anywhere because she got my money noughting can do about it because she got fall control off it.

[ibelieveinharrystyles]

Chapter Ten: Make A Wish

Forever? Masterlist

5th July 2017 Ashley woke up to the sound of Daisy babbling away happily in her cot, the sooner she could get a two bedroom flat the better. She climbed out of bed, greeting Daisy with a massive smile, “Hello birthday girl how are you?” She asked, lifting her out of the cot, getting a babble of random sounds back, she had recently learnt to say ‘mama’, something she  had been overusing extensively. “Shall we have a special birthday breakfast? How about some pancakes?” Ashley asked Daisy as she took her through to the kitchen, resulting in an excited clap from Daisy as she put her in the safety of her highchair. She turned on the radio, hearing the familiar sound of Roman’s voice, understanding that Ashley was a single parent he offered to host the show on his own for the day to allow Ashley and Daisy to spend some quality time together. “Shall we listen to some of Uncle Harry’s music?” She asked Daisy as she weighed out the necessary ingredients for pancakes.

“Yeah! Yeah!” Daisy cried from her high chair, before Ashley began playing some classic One Direction out of the speakers in the kitchen.

London was in the middle of one of those heatwaves, the ones where one week it would be chucking it down with rain, and the next it's uncomfortably hot, For this reason Ashley thought it best to travel by bus, rather than subjecting herself and Daisy to the heat of the London Underground. Daisy seemed content though, she was sat on the seat beside Ashley, looking out of the window as they went past all the big monuments and crowds of people, Ashley spotted a heavily pregnant lady sat across from them, reminding her how unbearable she had found being pregnant with Daisy during the sweltering heat of summer, “How far gone are you? If you don’t mind me asking?” She asked the lady.

“Thirty seven weeks, if he doesn’t grow up to be a footballer these kicks will be wasted.” she told Ashley.

“Oh wow, I thought it was difficult carrying this one through summer, but she was born six weeks early.” Ashley replied.

“Oh goodness, how old is she?” She asked.

“It’s her first birthday today, we’re on our way to her uncle’s house for a birthday picnic.” Ashley explained.

“Oh you’re off the radio aren’t you? I listen to the breakfast show every morning, I think it’s wonderful.” She told Ashley.

“Thank you, I’m glad you enjoy it, as you can probably imagine, getting to work in the mornings after getting this little lady ready can be a struggle, but we make it work.” 

When Ashley first mentioned to Harry that she wanted to organise some sort of birthday celebration for Daisy he jumped at the chance to host it, even though the guests only consisted of Anne, Gemma and Linda, he still wanted to pull out all the stops, Ashley’s knock on the door was answered almost instantly by Harry, a massive smile upon his face, like he had just won the lottery, “Hello birthday girl!” He cried, stretching his arms up in the air, which in turn made Daisy smile from ear to ear, Ashley passed Daisy to him, knowing how much she idolised her uncle, he led them both into the kitchen that had been decorated with an impressive jungle theme, green balloons in a vast variety of colours and sizes littered the high ceiling. Whilst on the island in the middle of the kitchen a two tier vanilla and chocolate birthday cake was sat, decorated with figures of jungle animals, also on the island were bowls of crisps and plates of Daisy’s favourite snacks.

“You didn’t have to do all of this H, she would’ve been fine with a cake from tesco and a bag of chocolate buttons.” Ashley sighed as Harry showed Daisy all the toy jungle animals.

“I wanted to, it looks like I’ll be on tour for her birthday next year, and my favourite little lady deserves spoiling.” Harry insisted.

Gemma, Anne and Linda had all arrived shortly after Ashley and Daisy and now the celebrations were in full swing, everyone was sat around the island snacking on the crisps and biscuits Harry had laid out. “Presents! Let’s do presents!” Harry declared, before disappearing and returning with several parcels wrapped in obnoxiously pink wrapping paper. 

“Anyone would think Uncle Harry wanted to be your favourite,” Gemma said to Daisy who was currently sitting on her lap.

“I already am her favourite,” Harry informed Gemma, before miming tossing his hair, he placed the parcels on the table for Daisy, and with the help of her Auntie Gemma she unwrapped them one by one, Harry being Harry had gone all out, the presents ranged from a giraffe teddy to a pair of mini old skool vans, which Harry insisted were a necessity. Gemma treated her to a set of insanely soft pyjamas and a toy elephant, whilst Anne bought her a set of story books and Linda gave her a new dressing gown that looked like a giraffe.

“Thank you so much, all of you, these are such lovely presents, you’re a lucky lady aren’t you Daisy? What do you say to everyone?” Ashley said to Daisy.

“Ta!” she exclaimed, resulting in a mixture of sighs and claps from everyone sitting around the table.

“I’ve got you one more present,” Harry handed Ashley a green envelope, Ashley opened it hesitantly, inside was a picture from London Zoo, “Before I leave for tour, I’ve booked us a tour of London Zoo after they close, so that Daisy can see all the animals properly, and we won’t have to worry about the hassle from photographers and all that.”

“You’re a proper softie Styles,” Ashley said, moving round the island and wrapping her arms around him, “Thank you for all of this.”

After indulging in slices of Daisy’s birthday cake everyone agreed a walk across Hampstead Heath was necessary, Harry carried Daisy on his shoulders, who seemed to be having way too much fun playing with her uncle’s hair. Anne and Linda strolled behind, chatting about their children, and the adults they had become, whilst Gemma and Ashley walked side by side, “He loves her doesn’t he?” Ashley whispered softly.

“He’d do anything for her, they have the purest little friendship.” Gemma told her.

“I don’t know what I’d be doing if it weren’t for Harry, Daisy and I would’ve spent today watching all the Madagascar movies whilst eating our way through a chocolate cake, but he’s made this day so memorable for her.” Ashley replied as they all found a seat underneath a big tree to provide them with shade.

“You alright up there munchkin?” Ashley asked Daisy, gently stroking her cheek.

“I should probably get Daisy home soon, it's nearly her bedtime.” Ashley sighed,  the sun was beginning to set over the heath, a golden glow dancing on all their bodies, the heath was pretty empty except for a few families and couples who were either enjoying the infrequent summer weather or taking their dogs for a well needed walk. Ashley hadn’t really clocked it at first, but there was a distinctive figure hovering by a tree across from them, being friends with Harry for as long as she had, she learnt to shrug off people loitering near them, assuming they were either a fan or a photographer. But when she caught a glimpse of this person again she realised she did in fact know them, “What the fuck,” she whispered under her breath, quiet enough that Daisy wouldn’t hear, but loud enough that Harry did hear, he glanced in the same direction as Ashley, realising what she had seen. Ashley stood up without saying a word and walked towards him.

“Well if it isn’t Harry Styles’ favourite baby mama,” He slurred, taking a swig of what must have been his fifth or so can of beer.

“What the fuck are you doing here Matt?” Ashley asked him, pushing him back.

“I just wanna see my daughter.” He told her, leaning against the tree.

“No, that’s not happening,” Ashley told him bitterly.

“Why? You scared I’ll see she actually has an uncanny resemblance to that prick over there?”

“Harry is not her dad!” Ashley told him.

“Well then why can’t I see her?”

“You lost the right to see her the day you told me you didn’t want anything to do with her, you know she was born six weeks early? She was kept in an incubator because she was too small, except you wouldn’t know that because you weren’t there, so excuse me for not wanting you to have anything to do with her.” 

“Are you alright?” Ashley turned to see Harry, he had left Daisy in the capable care of Anne.

“Here’s your knight in shining armour coming to your rescue,” Matt slurred.

“I’m fine Harry, can you take Daisy back to yours? I don’t want her seeing this.” Ashley asked him.

“I’m not leaving you with him Ash.” Harry replied.

“How long did it take you mate?” Matt asked him.

“What are you on about?” Harry responded,

“To get her into bed? Didn’t take me too long if I’m honest-” Harry tried to swing a punch at him, but Ashley was quick to hold him back, pressing both her hands against his chest.

“H, he isn’t worth it.” She soothed, cupping his face with one hand, so as to make him look her in the eye, whilst still holding him back with the other.

“If you try and approach Ashley or Daisy again, you will be hearing from my lawyers, do you understand?” Harry asked him sternly.

“I get you big man, I’m not sticking around to deal with you and your emotional baggage.”

The group had now returned back to Harry’s house, Gemma, Linda and Anne were entertaining Daisy with cartoons in the living room, “You didn’t have to step in like that H,” Ashley whispered as she poured him a cup of tea.

“He was out of order.” Harry insisted as he took his mug of tea, “I wasn’t just going to stand there whilst he talked about you like that.”

“He’s not wrong though is he? I didn’t have to sleep with him that night, I just did anyway.” Ashley said, fiddling with the lid on the milk bottle.

“Just because you slept with him that doesn’t make you easy, you think I haven’t slept with people I regret?” Harry replied.

“It’s different for you, a man sleeps with twenty girls and he’s a lad, a girl sleeps with five men and she’s a slag.” 

“You know I don’t think that don’t you?” Harry assured her.

“I know, because you are a gooden, and one day when Daisy brings a boy home I want him to be as good as you, and I think by having a positive male role model in her life like you, she will learn that she deserves someone who if she asks for the world will give her the universe.” Ashley told him.

“Is that you saying you think I am boyfriend material?” Harry grinned.

“Don’t push it Styles.”

[besidemethewholedamntime]

Happy birthday to the wonderfully amazing bean @bobbimorseisbisexual ! I hope you still manage to have an amazing day because you most definitely deserve it for being such an amazing bean! Here’s some FitzHunter to show you my love for you. Thank you for being you!

the (not so) great british bake off 

Summary: 

"There’s a rather unsettling noise, and he turns just in time to see the cake completely cave in the middle, ruining any last chance there might have been of salvaging it. Fitz sighs deeply, a real lung-emptying sigh, and pinches the bridge of his nose tight. This thing has been such a headache, and if he didn’t love Hunter so much then he wouldn’t have even bloody bothered in the first place."

Fitz tries to bake a birthday cake for Hunter. Perhaps it doesn't go according to plan

{Read on Ao3}

or read below!

There’s icing on the floor and a cherry has gotten itself stuck on the ceiling. The cabinet doors are sticky with melted butter and the toaster has miraculously ended up coated in flour. In the middle of it, Fitz stands with his hands on his hips, surveying the attempt of a cake in front of him. The cake is drooping slightly in the centre and the edges are crispy and black. The pathetic attempt at icing drips off the lopsided top, not at all in an appetising way. The cherries, possibly long past their expiration date, seem to have collapsed in on themselves, and as Fitz attempts to tell himself it’s not really that bad, one drops off the side with the running icing and lands with an audible plop on the counter.

“This is ridiculous,” he tells himself. “Bloody ridiculous.”

It’s not Hunter’s birthday until tomorrow, but he’d wanted the cake made today so he could spend tonight organising the decorations, so when Hunter left for work at 7am tomorrow morning, all he had to do was put them up, put out the food, and wait for the guests to arrive. Parties have never been Fitz’s strong suit, and clearly neither is baking, but he just wanted to do something nice and lovely for the man he’d quite gladly spend the rest of his life with.

The ingredients for the cake weren’t the best, that he’ll admit. They were bought rather cheaply from the newsagents at the bottom of the street. London rent and London shopping eats away most of their money each month, and as a result it’s 39p flour and 15p eggs that currently litter the kitchen worktop. In all honesty he hadn’t really thought it mattered, and perhaps it still doesn’t. Perhaps it’s his technique which is sadly lacking in quality.

His mum was never really a baker, and she still isn’t. A nurse in the hospital, his birthday cakes were always made by his gran and then when she died it was always something from Marks & Spencer if there was money, or Tesco if there wasn’t. Unfortunately, the state of Fitz’s finances doesn’t even stretch that far, the last of it having been used on the party decorations and the train fare for Hunter’s parents to come and surprise their son at the weekend.

“Looks like it’s a trip back to the shop,” he mutters, without hope. This is his third attempt at such a cake, and he doubts four, five, or even six will be of much improvement.

He’s never been much of a cook, but he thought even he would be able to manage a cake. He’s an engineer for goodness sake. He can build marvellous things from nothing, can see in his mind exactly what he wants to create and then create it, just like that. His talent clearly only covers inedible things. Add a bit of flour or an egg and the whole thing is a disaster, as evidenced by the buttery handprints that make it a task to even turn on the tap to wash his hands.

There’s a rather unsettling noise, and he turns just in time to see the cake completely cave in the middle, ruining any last chance there might have been of salvaging it. Fitz sighs deeply, a real lung-emptying sigh, and pinches the bridge of his nose tight. This thing has been such a headache, and if he didn’t love Hunter so much then he wouldn’t have even bloody bothered in the first place.

Maybe he can ask someone else to bring a cake to the party tomorrow. Mack’s coming, and he’s probably a pretty good baker. It seems like something he’d be good at, but then Fitz remembers his own skill set and how it’s not always transferable. Or Jemma? Jemma’s good at everything. Then, with a slight wince, he remembers the time in university halls when she’d set fire to a tea-towel trying to get a pan out of the oven and he thinks that this is probably the one thing she doesn’t excel at. Daisy doesn’t even pretend she can cook, and told him as much when he asked her about bringing a little something. There’s Elena, but whenever she makes food, she tends to rush it, as if forgetting that not everything can be as quick as her, and so everything tends to come out slightly raw.

It’s unbelievable, it really is, but Fitz comes out as the best baker except he’s really, truly, completely awful and the cake currently slinking down the kitchen cabinet is a testament to that.

One wallet-emptying trip to the newsagents later and he stands in front of the now slightly cleaner kitchen worktop, the ingredients for attempt number four weighed out into separate bowls in order to try and be absolutely perfect. He has the recipe printed in front of him and takes a deep, cleansing breath and starts methodically following through, hoping that by some divine miracle his luck changes.

It is of absolutely no surprise when, forty-five minutes later, the cake is as flat as a pancake on the cooling rack, the icing is horribly lumpy, and there’s a dismal looking yolk from an unfortunate egg accident sitting in pride of place on the floor.

“Shite,” Fitz says, feeling his bottom lip poke out and a deep sense of failure fill him from the toes up. “Shite shite shite.”

-x-

Hunter walks through the door in a surprisingly jovial mood. Today’s shift wasn’t so bad and it’s a whole thirteen hours before he has to be back, and he gets to finish early tomorrow to celebrate his birthday which he’s sure (if he knows Fitz, which of course he does) involves some sort of surprise.

The smell of burning is what hits his nostrils first, followed by the smoky haze that fills the flat. This is certainly a surprise, but just not of the variety he was expecting.

“What the hell?” He shouts, knowing there’s no fire because the alarm is surprisingly silent, but also not seeing any other explanation. “Fitz? What the hell’s happened?”

Fitz appears out of the haze, looking as though he’s aged ten years. There’s flour in his hair which does nothing to help his aged appearance, and there’s something on his shirt which just looks as though it has a weird consistency. Hunter’s heart skips at the sight of him regardless, the way it always does after a hard shift, knowing the man he loves can take all of his cares away in a second.

“What happened to you?”

Fitz’s sighs so deeply it’s a wonder it ever stops. “It was supposed to be a surprise.”

“And it is, believe me.” Hunter’s eyebrows draw together. “Not the kind you were expecting though, eh?”

“No.” Fitz rubs the back of his neck, staring at the ground as though it will provide him with a way out. “I tried to bake you a cake.”

His jaw almost drops to the floor, and it’s a conscious effort to keep it clamped shut. “No,” he exclaims.

Fitz nods mournfully.

“You can’t cook.”

Another mournful nod

“What in the hell possessed you to bake a cake?”

“It was supposed to be a surprise, you know, for your birthday. Thought it would be a nice thing to do considering it’s not like I can do much for you this year.”

Hunter’s heart feels like the size of a watermelon in his chest but he can’t get over the shock and the utter stupidity of a man who is literally a certified genius.

“You’re insane. Actually insane.” He smiles though, because for how insane it is, it’s hilarious. “Can I see it?”

Fitz winces. “I’m not sure if you’re going to want to do that. It’s pretty bad in there.”

Hunter rolls his eyes. “Go on. Show us the damage.”

In Fitz’s defence, cake number six hasn’t turned out as terribly as all the others. It’s risen slightly and it’s definitely more golden than charcoal, but the shape of it is strange and there’s an odd lump on one of the sides that doesn’t quite go in when pressed. The best attempt though it may be, everything about it still screams please don’t eat me.

Hunter can’t contain his laughter. “Oh my God.”

Fitz crosses his arms a little defensively and huffs, “I tried.”

“You tried something alright. There was an attempt, if it can be called that.”

His churlish attitude only makes Hunter laugh louder. Strangely enough it’s the best birthday present he could ever get. He clocks the ingredients on the side of the counter. “No wonder it didn’t work, with stuff like that.”

“It was all I could get,” Fitz huffs again. “The second time there was less choice.”

“The second time?”

“Uh, yeah.” More rubbing of the back of the neck, avoidance of Hunter’s eyes. “This might not be the first attempt.”

There’s a reason that Hunter does all of the cooking, and it’s a very good one. There’s a reason there’s a ban on Fitz making anything more strenuous than plain pasta, and if they ever needed any more proof then it’s staring them right in the face.

“How many attempts?” Hunter laughs, expecting a reasonable number and not the murmured six that barely comes out of Fitz’s mouth.

“Six!” He all but screeches, eyebrows rising almost off his head. Fitz sheepishly shows him the evidence, which is currently lined up on the kitchen windowsill for no good reason at all.

“Sorry,” Fitz says. “Just wanted to make something nice.”

“I wouldn’t apologise, love. From what I can see, I’ve had a lucky escape.”

Fitz smiles but his eyes are still sad and it’s unbearable to look at so Hunter brings him in for a side-armed hug. For all the laughing and joking he’s actually deeply appreciative, and he knows it’s not something he’d ever be able to put into words.

“You didn’t have to, you know that, yeah? I thought we agreed no big birthday things this year.”

Money’s been tight, no getting away from it, and they had agreed that this would be a low-key affair this year. Not that Hunter can find fault in it, he knows he probably would have tried to do the same thing.

“I just didn’t want you to have nothing for your birthday, is all.”

“How much did all this cost though?” He sighs gently as Fitz rests his head on his shoulder. “I didn’t want you to bankrupt yourself for me.”

“I didn’t-” Fitz starts but cannot finish. “Doesn’t matter. I’d bankrupt myself for you any day.”

“You’re an idiot,” Hunter sighs, looking at the sad remnants of cake and feeling nothing but a rush of love and his watermelon-sized heart beat rapidly in his chest. “A bloody idiot.” He looks at Fitz, pulls him closer. “You’re lucky I wouldn’t have you any other way.”

[i-looktothe-stars]

thanks @s-ongbir-d for tagging me!!

1) what is the colour of your hairbrush?

pink and green

2) what's a food you never eat?

mushrooms are awful and I hate them

3) are you typically too warm or too cold?

I'm usually really cold, my friends joke that I can't thermoregulate because I'll be wearing 5 layers (including 2 jumpers and a coat) and still be shivering)

4) what were you doing 45 minutes ago?

listening to the latest episode of rusty quill gaming! I binged it all in...less than a week(? idk time doesn't exist anymore) so now it's frustrating having to wait for new episodes

5) what's your favourite chocolate bar?

crunchies are top tier and I will fight about that if I have to

6) have you ever been to a professional sports event?

nope! my mum wanted to get tickets to the olympics in 2012 though

7) what's the last thing you said out loud?

"all the doors are open now" (I was singing along to red signal okay)

8) what's your favourite ice cream?

okay the Ben and Jerry's ice cream with the caramel in the middle is So Good, but I also like mint chocolate and coffee (not together obviously)

9) what's the last thing you had to drink?

...probably a blackberry tea this morning? (it's 8pm. hydration? I don't know her)

10) do you like your wallet?

ehhh it's fine, it's just this embroidered black purse with a zip. its juuust big enough to keep my card, train tickets, and some physical money, so it's good enough. I don't really need a bigger one

11) what was the last thing you ate?

I'm snacking on jaffa cakes as I write this

12) did you buy any new clothes in the last week?

for once, yes! I bought the very cool and sexy new magnus merch. unfortunately it's too big so I need to send it back and get a smaller size :/

13) what was the last sporting event you watched?

uhhh idk probably the races at my school's sports day 3 years ago? I skipped two of them because sports day is The Worst, then y11 ended early so I didnt have to watch it

14) what's your favourite flavour of popcorn?

my friends hate me for it but I looove salty popcorn. I can't stand toffee because it's the only one my sister likes, so I got sick of it when we had to share during movie nights when we were younger. (same with ham and pineapple pizza)

15) who was the last person you sent a message to?

my dnd discord! love you guys 💜

16) ever go camping?

my dad lives in wales so yes. a lot. it's fun when it's not raining?

17) do you take vitamins?

no but I probably should

18) do you go to church on sundays?

nope, I've only ever been to church for christingle services with brownies/guides, and that was mostly for the orange with sweets on it

19) do you have a tan?

ahahahahah no, I look like a dying victorian child. last time I tanned, it was because I got sunburned at pride and I had tan lines around my glasses

20) do you prefer chinese food or pizza?

love me some chinese takeaway! (although spicy meat feast pizzas are also very good)

21) do you drink soda with a straw?

only at fast food places, although I usually get iced tea instead of something fizzy

22) what colour socks do you wear?

I have multiple pairs of this one kind of grey fluffy socks, that's like basically half my sock drawer. the rest are either black, or super brightly coloured

23) do you ever drive over the speed limit?

I can't drive yet so no. i was supposed to get lessons for my birthday in march but uhh. that couldn't happen for obvious reasons. i probably wouldn't though? because the speed limit is a Rule and breaking a Rule is Bad

24) what terrifies you?

going outside, phone calls, answering questions in class, windows at night ("because what if there's Something there?")... more like what doesn't terrify me? although honestly, I'm not scared by horror media, as long as it doesn't have any jumpscares

25) look to your left! what do you see?

my book collection! (specifically my regular sized paperbacks. I have a pretty weird organisation system? I split paperbacks and hardbacks, then sort by size, colour and alphabetically by title in that order)

26) what chore do you hate?

washing up. Wet Food Bad

27) what do you think of when you hear an australian accent?

australia I guess? idk, what else would i think of

28) what's your favourite soda?

probably apple tango? I don't really drink anything fizzy. except sparkling water because it's great fuck you

29) do you prefer going into fast food places or using the drive through?

none of my friends can drive yet either so going in

30) who was the last person you talked to?

my mum, she wanted me to come and look at the pond she made today

31) what's your favourite cut of beef?

I don't know?? I don't ask what cut it is when I have beef, I just eat it

32) what's the last song you listened to?

red signal by the mechanisms, because sometimes you just need a little bit of eldritch chanting to make everything okay

33) what's the last book you read?

stuff matters by mark miodownik! it's about material science and it's one of my favourite books

34) can you say the alphabet backwards?

lol no what kind of sorcery--

35) how do you like your coffee?

2 sugars and a bit of milk, but I prefer those sweet iced coffees you get at tesco. those were basically the only things getting me through sixth form until quarantine happened

36) what's your favourite pair of shoes?

ok I currently only have 2 pairs, my black and white trainers and a pair of heels that I haven't worn since new year 2019. so the trainers I guess

37) what time do you normally go to bed?

I usually go to bed around 10, but i stay up at least until midnight, usually closer to 2 am

38) what time do you normally wake up?

for school I wake up at 6:30 and get up at 7, because I physically can't get out of bed until I've snoozed my alarm at least 3 times. although at the moment,,,,,,,,,,,probably around 10:30? I set alarms to try and keep some kind of structure... and then sleep through them

39) do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

absolutely sunsets. I live about 10 mins away from the beach, so watching the sky change colour and the stars come out as the sun sets over the sea, with a mug of fruit tea warming my hands... fantastic

40) how many blankets are on your bed?

just one, but I have wayyy too many pillows

41) describe your dinner plates

my parents just get plain black or white sets from ikea or wherever

42) what's your favourite alcoholic beverage?

I Am A Minor And I Have Never Drunk Alcohol I Don't Even Know What Alcohol Is Ha Ha Ha

43) do you play cards?

no, although I used to play solitaire A Lot because it was one of the only games I had on my shitty purple ipod

44) what colour is your car?

train coloured (I don't have a car yet)

45) can you change a tire?

nope

46) what's your favourite province?

I'm english what does this mean

47) what's your favourite job you've had?

I've only really had 3 jobs: I answered the phone when my parents ran a takeaway from home, I work in their cafe every now and again doing washing up or sometimes waitressing, and I used to have a paper round. I Do Not like any of them, but the second is probably my favourite

48) what's the biggest scar you've got?

a surgery scar from my appendectomy 6 years ago,,,,,,,,,,,,I thought it was just really bad food poisoning for maybe an entire week

49) how have you made someone happy today?

I hope I made my friends happy? I really enjoy talking to all of you in our discord server, y'all make me smile so much and I hope I can return the favour

i tag @johnathansims @spookyhetero and @two-am-art if y'all want to get involved

[paradisobound]

A Royal Wedding

Summary: A chance encounter leads to a royal wedding. 

Genre: Fluff and also royal!phan (sort of!) 

Words Count: 997 words 

Authors Note: The wedding made me emo today and my hand slipped--997 words slipped.

If someone were to ask Dan as a child if he could dream about his future: Dan would say he’d be a prince. If someone were to ask Dan as a sixteen year old if he could dream about his future: Dan would say he wasn’t even sure if he’d live to see his twentieth birthday. If someone were to ask Dan the same question again when he was twenty, he wouldn’t have any answer because the truth was that he had no idea what the future held for him anymore. 

But it was when he turned twenty five that his life changed dramatically. It started with an innocent job in his local coffee shop in London. He was busy cleaning tables, ready to close when a man ran into the shop and rushed to a table, a hood concealing his head and a pair of dark tinted glasses covering his eyes. 

Dan was confused, unsure of who this person could be because this was sketchy as fuck and Dan didn’t feel like getting stabbed tonight. He would happily just hand this man the till and then cower and cry. 

But this man didn’t appear interested in anything besides hiding. And when Dan looked up from the counter to outside of the cafe, he noticed a hoard of running young girls rushing by, all with cell phones in hand. 

“Do you mind if I sit here for a while?” 

The man’s voice startled Dan, but it was familiar in a sense. Although, he couldn’t pinpoint why straight away. 

Dan shook his head. “Were those girls running after you?” 

The man nodded. “I just wanted to go to Tesco for some cake. My advisor told me against it but I thought that it was late enough at night that I could get there and back without being noticed. I’ve only been outside for a total of five minutes and I’m already being chased.” 

Dan’s head snapped away from the glass door and turned towards the man. His heart stopped and leaped into his throat. He knew where the voice came from. With his sunglasses and hood now removed, the stark blue eyes and dark raven hair bore into Dan’s soul. 

That was Prince Philip, or Phil as he’s been called, sitting there. The Duke of Cambridge and the future king. And he was sitting five fucking feet from Dan right now. He could faint. He’s never been this close to the prince before. It was overwhelming. 

“Sounds rough.” 

Dan wanted to facepalm. Sounds rough? Of course it was fucking rough. He’s the prince and he was just chased by a hoard of school girls! 

Prince Phil chuckled. “It’s very rough, actually.” 

Dan shook his head to clear his thoughts. He should offer the prince something to eat or drink…right? 

“Do you want something to drink?” Dan asked, his voice cracking. “We have coffee or tea…an—and we also ha-have cakes…oh shoot, no. I just threw them out.” 

Dan was so embarrassed at how flustered he was. 

“I’ll take just tea with some milk and sugar, if you don’t mind.” 

Of fucking course the Prince was polite as he spoke, not even stumbling over a word. 

Dan hated himself in that moment. 

When Prince Phil left that night, Dan was sure that the freak encounter was over and he’d never see the Prince again. He didn’t realize though that just two weeks later, he’d be going on a walk in the gardens of Buckingham Palace with the Prince on what would be their ‘first date’. 

They dated for nearly three years before Phil asked Dan to marry him in a private engagement at Windsor Castle as they stayed for a brief holiday together. It caught Dan off guard, never in a million years did he expect to be asked to be wed to not only the love of his entire life, but to a prince. 

And so this is where Dan’s future was now. At the age of twenty eight, Dan was stood at the alter at St. George’s Chapel at Windsor with his hands gripped in Phil’s. This was a big deal in many ways. Phil was marrying him, another male, which was unseen prior to this moment. And there were many things going through Dan’s mind about how he would even be seen. He was just a commoner, no royal blood even coming close to him, and yet he’s reciting his vows to Phil with tears lightly traveling down his cheeks in front of hundreds of cameras and an audience of millions. 

He stumbled slightly over his words but seeing Phil stood in his military garb in front of him, teary eyed just the same as him, he didn’t care. Everyone could see the raw love between them, how much they meant to each other and how certain they were to love each other for eternity. 

When he walked up with his father to the alter, giving him away, and he saw Phil standing there, his lips had tightened so tight into a smile. And when he turned to Phil and Phil saw him, he’ll never forget the words ‘You’re so handsome. I love you so much’ that escaped Phil’s lips, unheard by any other. 

Dan finished his vows, turning to the priest who was now holding both of their rings. Phil took the ring first and said the words ‘I do’ after the Priest spoke. Then he held out Dan’s hand and placed the gold band onto his finger and Dan shivered at the chill metal touch that was so very much welcomed. 

When he did Phil’s next, he was afraid of dropping the ring but he managed with shaky hands to get it on. And then he heard it…the words that were ringing in his ears as he stared into the blue eyes of his love. 

I now pronounce you the Royal Duke and His Highness the Duke of Cambridge. 

[noteatingfortwo]

A Birth Experience

Bags packed, we were ready to go to Oxford for the weekend to help Nic’s friend Ian sort out his stuff having had to leave for Singapore in a hurry and as an excuse of a final weekend getaway before baby arrived.

Of course, in the Valolas world this meant that baby was likely to come this weekend.

25th July 6am, I awoke with period cramps. From reading a number of positive birth stories, I knew this was an early sign of labour, but partially in denial and not wanting to defer from our weekend getaway plans, I pushed these aside. However, my body had other ideas and continued down the labour track as I got up to go to the loo from slight leakage. Again, I tried to sleep through this, and the cramps, but at 9am, as if to confirm it was really happening, I had heavier leakage and a sticky clear mucus on tissue, which could only be my mucus plug. I also felt the urge to do a poo but nothing came.

After telling Nic and giving Ian a quick call, we decided instead to do a day trip to Oxford as from this point labour could still be a day or two away. Perhaps instinctively I knew that baby would arrive early as I had worked late into the night the previous night to finish off the project profitability report for work which gave me slight closure. However, it was still 2 weeks before our due date of 8th August and we weren’t quite ready.

We loaded up the car and headed out on our way to Oxford, stopping off for a hearty MacDonalds sausage mcmuffin along the way. It was as if the universe was trying to tell us something! I have always thought God has a sense of humour, particularly when it comes to us but he dropped us a number of hints. First there was the dad licence plate on a car in front of us, then talk about babies on the news and finally a billboard with ‘Nappy Days’ advertised. 

We arrived in Oxford some 2.5 hours later. Ian’s apartment was nice; overlooking the river and I suddenly felt slight FOMO at not being able to live out my weekend getaway - the tapas place I had booked for dinner, the Cotswolds walk I had planned for the Sunday etc. Still, we continued with the task at hand, sorting out Ian’s stuff into throw, recycle and ship piles. Midway through and when we were contemplating whether to go out for lunch or order in, I felt a trickle and rushed to the loo. It was as I had read in books, heard from NCT and in our positive birth company videos - a ‘straw coloured discharge’. It wasn’t the Hollywood gush of water but my waters had indeed broke at around 1pm. 

This set Nic into action mode as he called Ian to enable Plan B. Nic handed an unfriendly, unenthusiastic Singaporean, a fellow course mate of Ian’s the keys and informed her that I was in labour, to which she responded ‘poor thing’ and with that we were back on the road home.  

Along the way, I managed to call Lewisham Birth Centre at the hospital to let them know my waters broke to which they asked us to come in to check. We arrived at the hospital at 4pm, no contractions but they confirmed my waters had indeed broken and after doing a vaginal examination (ouch!) also confirmed I was not dilated but I was to return in 24 hours if not earlier if there was no immediate onset of labour. Since there was no immediate rush, we took this opportunity to go to Tesco to do a quick grocery shop for when we returned home from the hospital (which I was expecting to be Sunday 26th at the latest), even buying a birthday cake as Julia from NCT had suggested (I was not baking one!). 

Back home, we realised in all the excitement, we had skipped lunch but anticipating a long wait ahead, filled up on an early dinner of tortellini with spinach in a mascarpone sauce whilst watching Netflix. Also anticipating that I would go into labour in the next 24 hours, I did a quick email handover at work so I could have closure and wrote my love letter/card to Nic. 

I ate a quarter pack of dates to hopefully naturally induce labour and finally around 9pm, I started to get very mild contractions maybe 10 -15 minutes apart. I was hopeful that this was all the pain I was going to feel and that the pain was overrated but unfortunately I was in store for so much more. I bounced around on my birth ball, knelt down by the bed as the contractions came closer and closer together and I monitored them on my contractions app. By 10pm, I started to get 3 every 10 minutes, a prerequisite of getting admitted into the hospital. I endured this for an hour and a half, feeling quite proud and also hopeful that once at the hospital, as in seemingly all of the positive birth stories I had read, I would be able to find out I was so far dilated that birth was imminent. My dreams were crushed when upon another vaginal examination in hospital, I found I was only 3cm dilated. 

We were led into a birth centre room anyway and pretty much left to our own devices. It was a nice set up, though chilly, with a double bed, sofa, birthing pool and a private room. We made ourselves comfortable putting up fairy lights, music on and working through my contractions together as they got stronger and stronger. 

The rest was all a blur. The contractions got progressively stronger and less manageable. I kept feeling like I wanted to go to the toilet but was unable to. Nic was my rock and strength all the way, feeding me bits of croissant to keep my strength up, holding me through the contractions, if I had to do it myself, think I would have just broken down. I went from wanting a completely natural birth to taking all the pain killers they offered me - paracetamol, codeine, pethidine and of course gas and air. 6 hours later, they measured how far I was dilated again, still 3cm. I was close to breaking point after hearing that and in so much pain. The pethidine gave temporary relief as I tried to ‘rest’ between contractions. 

I kept getting the ‘urge to push’ that was talked about on all of the positive birthing company videos except that they told me specifically NOT to push as my cervix wasn’t dilated and this basically meant I would be pushing against a wall which would bleed. It was excruciating pain but somehow I got through this through inhaling gas and air like my life depended on it.

Next thing I knew, I was being measured again. 9cm dilated. I felt a sense of relief, like I wasn’t imagining that the contractions were indeed getting stronger and more intense. Still I had to wait for that last cm. Chris (a midwife with pink hair) and another lady came in to monitor me and baby every 15 minutes. To allow baby room to descend further, they had to empty my bladder with a catheter but baby was apparently sitting on my urethra and so they poked and prodded around and were unable to find it. IT WAS EXTREMELY PAINFUL. Another two senior midwives came in to help with this, I inhaled gas and air so violently that I was almost scared it would give me brain damage as I almost blacked out with the light headedness. I vaguely remember 4 midwives standing over me with Nic holding my hand beside me and a curly haired one telling me I was doing so well. I didn’t feel like I was doing well and badly wanted it to be over. At last I was able to feel temporary relief from them finally managing to connect the catheter and release my bladder.

9cm dilated meant I was able to finally go into the water bath. It was warm and I felt temporary relief as Nic held my hand and I managed my contractions in the water, still holding back the urge to push. Finally, I got the go ahead from the midwife to push. However, at this point it was around 11am on 26th July and I was so exhausted from no sleep and barely any food that I had little energy left to push, I sucked on the energy sweets, hoping that it might bring me that boost of energy I needed. Sadly, though I moved in position to push in the water, the contractions had slowed and I pushed with all my might to no avail. This definitely was not the ‘urge to push’ and breathing the baby out through down breathing as we had watched in hypnobirthing. 

After trying in the water for ages with the encouragement and direction of the two midwives, we decided to try pushing on the bed. They were both getting increasingly worried about the risk of infection given that my waters had broken more than 24 hours before and so called in the senior midwives for assistance as well. I was completely drained of energy, but tried my best to stay motivated to push. They could barely see the head of baby though and apparently her head was turned, in a back to back position so we needed to turn her before she could come out although they kept reassuring me they could literally feel her head right at the entrance. I had to give up the gas and air so I could push better so the pain was the worst I had ever experienced. I tried different positions, on my side, on my back, on a toilet like seat, on my other side but nothing worked. They gave me energy in the form of HP ready salted crisps in between contractions and the midwives were so good in motivating me to march and squat to urge the contractions on to give a boost to the pushing. I pushed so hard that I squeezed Nic and the midwife’s hand probably to breaking point. But still no progress. It was beyond disappointing. All through this though, baby somehow remained calm and her heartrate was normal which was reassuring.

From there, there was no choice but to wheel me upstairs to the delivery suite for intervention. I was put on a hospital bed and immediately several people came around me offering this, that and the other. The contractions were still coming but at lower frequency and they encouraged me to continue pushing but I was completely drained of energy. I was to be given some kind of spinal epidural and the baby was to be turned around by forceps and brought out. The staff were very matter of fact and I was wheeled into the operating theatre very quickly for fear of risk of infection.

The operating theatre was as scary as it looks on Greys’ Anatomy. There were at least a dozen people surrounding me. They introduced themselves one by one but I couldn’t take it all in. It was intimidating and I just wanted it to be over. I was given the injection in my spine and told not to move. They tested it was worked by spraying a cold spray from my waist down and asking if I could feel it. I couldn’t. It was a scary feeling in itself, not being able to feel your own lower body but this also meant I couldn’t feel the pain of the contractions. I remember touching my leg and thinking I had touched someone else and so apologised but looking up and seeing it was my own legs up in stirrups. 

From here, while they worked on me below, I decided to shut my eyes to shield myself from the blood and whatever they were doing down there. They made a cut - an episiotomy to assist with the giant forceps they were going to shove up there. Nic was on my left side but I could barely focus. A woman had her hand on my stomach to feel the contractions for me and directed me to push. I tried so hard to ‘push’; there was no sensation or feeling of pushing or even direction when she asked me to imagine doing the biggest poo I had ever done, there was simply nothing down there.

At last, I heard them vaguely say they could see the head. I had pushed the head out! I couldn’t feel anything and there was the sensation that I was in fact watching this happen to myself from up above. Then with a few more contractions, I ‘gently’ pushed the rest of the body out. I felt a little emptiness inside my belly. They lifted baby up and congratulated us. Nic teared up. I think I teared but partially out of relief. I felt so distanced from the experience and delirious. Nic went to cut the umbilical cord and they brought baby over to the scales to weigh her and do their checks. I thought I heard her cries but was so faint, I closed my eyes. I heard them busying around me, counting up the pieces of equipment, at one point it seemed like they had lost a piece of rag, I shut this out mentally. They helped me deliver the placenta and sewed me up for what seemed like ages. I was told I had lost 1.3 litres of blood when the norm is 500ml. It was all just a blur until they put baby, all red and covered in white gunk on top of me. 6.34pm she was born weighing a mere 2.64kg.

We had done it! Baby was out in the world and alive and kicking! I felt such relief and couldn’t believe she was really ours! She was so much smaller and skinnier than I had imagined, I couldn’t believe she was really here!

[lindsaywesker]

Good morning! I hope you slept well and feel rested? Currently sitting in my study, enjoying my first cuppa of the day. Just come back from the outdoor gym at Roundwood Park. Spitting with rain. Look at my face. Am I bovvered? Going to jump in a hot shower soon, slide into my blue towelling robe, then have some more coffee and some Danish pastries I found on offer at Tesco’s last night. I might have had two already? A friend of mine that’s a mastering engineer (yes, vinyl mastering) posted that October 21st was the 50th anniversary of ‘Led Zeppelin II’. Christ, I wasn’t even 10, but I remember blagging the money from my mum to buy a copy! So, yesterday morning, I put on a CD of the album, wrapped my headphones around my ears and literally blew my mind. It sounded so good! The glorious and victorious sound of four, romantic music-lovers coming together to produce blues-based, rock-hard hard rock music. 50 years old! Wow, it took me way back! I was still a virgin (but not for long!) And, after 40 minutes, the album stopped! I was gutted! I’d forgotten that albums were two 20-minute sides. I’m so used to 70-minute CDs. 40 minutes wasn‘t enough, so I then played ‘Houses Of The Holy’. It made me very happy. Some songs evoke such memories and my memories are good! What are your memories like? In terms of money, I’m poor; in terms of memories, baby, I’m a rich man! The things I’ve done and the things I’ve seen! To quote another song title, life’s been good to me so far! Big love to my beautiful friend Kate Cardenas Cardenas, who’s making 200 carrot cake cupcakes for my birthday. How lucky am I? Obviously, I was very unlucky to be born so small, ugly and deformed but, since then, my luck has been good. And big love to my beautiful friend Lee Murthwaite for all his help with the party. Lee is a proper person; what you would call ‘a stand-up geezer’. Have a throbbing and thrusting Thursday (with hopefully a few thrills through your thoroughfare?) I love you all. And, remember, I have written three novels, all available via Amazon. You won’t be disappointed.

[femslashy]

make a wish

for day 20 of @snowbaz-feda and also @bazwearsjeans birthday!! (it’s still ur bday in texas this counts)

length: 1.7k

genre(s): fluff 

triggers/warnings: none

the five times simon tried to surprise baz on his birthday, and the one time he did

a/n: thank you @cherryonsimon for the beta as always!! ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY IZZIE DO U LOVE IT DO U KNOW HOW HARD TO WAS NOT TO SPOIL UR SURPRISE OH MY GOD HERE TAKE IT EVEN THOUGH U FELL ASLEEP LITERALLY RIGHT BEFORE I FINISHED x.x (also readmores don’t seem to work on mobile but if you click on my url it should take you to the post ^__^)

Baz’s 20th Birthday

Snow likes to think he’s subtle. A week ago he’d asked me what I wanted to do for my birthday; to which I’d replied that all I wanted was a quiet dinner with him at a restaurant where he couldn’t wear a tracksuit. And he’d laughed like I was being funny. (I wasn’t.)

I also wasn’t kidding when I’d shared my wishes, but Snow interpreted them as an invitation to plan me a surprise party. As I said before, Snow likes to think he’s subtle and, while I usually indulge this tendency, the urge to fuck with him was stronger.

It started when I saw the receipt for the cake.

“Simon?” I said, blinking like I had no idea what was going on, “why is there a receipt for a cake on your breakfast bar?” I watched in amusement as he missed the stick of butter, the knife in his hand landing with a hard clink on the ceramic dish. I waited a beat before asking again. “Why did you buy a cake?”

“That’s--that’s Penny’s,” he stammers out, “it’s--she--her friend is having a--a party--a going away party. They’re going away--moving. They’re moving away. So Penny bought a cake. For the party. For the person who’s moving away. For the party for the person who’s moving away.”

“This person is throwing their own going away party?”

“Yes…”

“Then why is Penny the one getting the cake?”

“Because she’s throwing the party.”

“You just said the person was throwing the party.”

This time the butter knife slips from his fingers completely and clatters to the floor. “I--I meant--I just--”

Oh, Merlin. This is becoming painful, and I feel like an idiot for riling him up like this. I reach for his hand and pull him close until his chest is touching mine. “Okay,” I murmur, “It’s okay, I believe you.” He looks relieved and I press a kiss to his temple, relishing in the small sigh he lets out.

When my birthday rolls around, I’m dragged to Nando’s where Bunce is waiting with my uni friends, and I pretend like I had no idea this was coming. The way Simon’s beaming at me as he holds my hand under the table makes the sacrifice worth it. Plus, there’s always next year.

Baz’s 21st Birthday

Mordelia is sprawled across the Starbucks couch, ignoring the glares from the other patrons as she casually sips her strawberry and creme frappuccino. I’m sitting in the armchair next to her, sneering at the onlookers. If I’m honest, Mordelia is being a brat for taking up the entire couch, but it’s amusing to watch the faces of the other people, so I don’t say anything.

If Snow was here with us, he’d be squirming in his seat, uncomfortable with the annoyance of those around him. He’s still got that damn hero complex, and if he was here I’d make her move. But he’s not, he’s busy doing something with Bunce, so I’d been sitting bored at the flat when Mordelia had called and invited me out for a birthday coffee.

I take a sip of my own coffee just as Mordelia’s phone dings. She takes a long, final drag of her drink and stands up. “We need to go.”

“Now?” I ask. “Why?”

She doesn’t look up from her phone, her thumbs flying across the screen. “Because I’m supposed to bring you to the party--oh, shit!”

Aleister Crowley, not again.

Baz’s 22nd Birthday

I’m talking on my mobile when Snow walks in the door. I nod in his direction and he gives me a little wave.

“Is that Izzie?” he asks and I nod. “Tell her she needs to be at the place at 5 to--” he pales. “To…to…”

I raise my eyebrows. “To what, Snow?”

He reaches into the pocket of his jeans. “Oh look, someone’s ringing me, I really should take this.”

“I didn’t hear anything,” I say, trying not to chuckle.

“It--it’s on silent.” he tries.

“Then how were you able to hear it?”

“I--” he pulls out his mobile and holds it up to his ear, mouthing goodbye, and I just smirk at his retreating figure and go back to my conversation

“Thanks for filling me in,” I say as we’re finishing up, loud enough for Simon to hear, and I hear him swear through the wall.

It’s almost starting to become a tradition.

Baz’s 23rd Birthday

Daphne hugs me goodbye on the front steps. “I’ll see you on Thursday?”

I’m confused. “I thought we were doing a family party that weekend?”

“Well, love, Simon thought it would be a nice idea to combine them both. Didn’t he tell you?”

I just roll my eyes. Trust Snow to forget to inform my stepmother that it’s a surprise party.

Baz’s 24th Birthday

[11:08] Penelope: Do you want to go to Ikea? I’ll buy lunch. [11:08] Baz: Take your boyfriend. [11:10] Penelope: I would, but he’s too busy helping your boyfriend. [11:10] Baz: What? [11:38] Penelope: It’s not important. [11:39] Baz: Then why can’t he go with you? [11:39] Penelope: Because he’s helping Simon with something. [11:41] Baz: You just said it wasn’t important. [11:45] Penelope: Fine. You have to come with me to Ikea so they can set up for you party. [11:45] Baz: … [11:45] Baz: You aren’t supposed to make it that easy. [11:50] Penelope: Don’t tell him I told you! [11:55] Baz: Not a chance, Bunce.

Baz’s 25th Birthday

Snow isn’t even trying to be sneaky this year. Last week I’d opened a package from Amazon that I thought was for me, and it was full of party decorations--and a very large “Happy Birthday Baz!” banner. Crowley, does he think I’m a child? The banner was white with my name in large blocky letters and it’s covered in zoo animals, for fucks sake. What was he thinking?

This morning I’d gone down to get our Tesco order and when I’d opened on of the bags I found 4 boxes of cake mix and several cans of frosting. Snow chose that moment to stumble sleepily out of our room, but he seemed to wake right up as soon as he saw the bag in front of me. He dashed over and snatched the bag from my surprised hands.

“Those are Penny’s!” He’d shouted, and run out the front door. I don’t even think he remembered he wasn’t wearing a shirt.

Now Snow’s standing in front of me in a smart shirt and a pair of dark jeans i suspect he’s nicked from my side of the closet, and I look him up and down.

“You’re a little dressed up for Nando’s, aren’t you?”

Simon just smiles in response and my stomach swoops a little bit. It’s that soft one he uses when it’s just the two of us, in the early morning before the city’s begun to wake; when it feels like we’re the only two people in the world. He holds out his hand and I take it, still feeling dazed from that bloody smile.

His mobile buzzes to let us know the uber is here and Simon grabs my hand and leads me out the door. I can’t help but feel like he’s taking me on an adventure. Something does feel different, we don’t go the same way down our street as usual, but I just assume this driver prefers a different route.

After all, every year on my birthday, Snow’s taken me to the same bloody place, why would this year be any different? Except when I glance out the window of the uber, I don’t recognize my surroundings.

“Where are we going?”

Snow shrugs, and I start to get curious.

“Merlin, are you actually taking me somewhere different?”

He shrugs again, and I shove his arm. He pretends to scowl at me, and I lean over and kiss my favorite mole on his cheek. Snow grins when I do that and catches my mouth in a kiss. The driver clears his throat from the front seat, but I ignore him as Simon slips his tongue into my mouth.

I put my hand on his knee and glide it up his thigh. He lets me get almost all the way to his crotch before grabbing my wrist and shaking his head. “Later.”

I pout. “But it’s my birthday.”

“Birthdays don’t mean you can feel me up in the back of an uber.”

I cross my arms and pretend to ignore him. He just leans into me, warm against my side.

We sit like that for the rest of the ride and I close my eyes, only opening them again when I feel the car come to a stop. We’re in front of what looks like a club and the sign on the front announces that Kishi Bashi will be playing there this evening.

“Simon…” I say, “Simon, did you plan this?”

“Yes?” he says like he’s unsure of my reaction. “When I found out he was going to be here on your birthday, I knew I had to get the tickets. Are you surprised?”

I nod dumbly,

The show is amazing, the food is delicious, and Snow is the best boyfriend in the world for giving me this. After the music is finished, I stand to go say hello. I don’t ask Simon to join me--I know crowds make him uncomfortable, so I squeeze his hand quickly before heading towards the stage.

I wait with the other fans, holding onto my paper napkin (thanks for the heads up, Snow) for him to sign. I want to tell him what a huge fan I am and that I’ve taught myself all of his songs, but all I can seem to say is: “I admire your work, I admire you,” on repeat. I have to force myself to stop, and turn around, still clutching the now signed napkin. (Never meet your idols.) (Especially when you haven’t planned out what to say.)

When I come back to the table, there’s a slice of cake with a single candle waiting for me and Simon’s beaming in my direction. He stands up to pull out my chair and I instantly feel calmer as I sink down into it. He nudges the plate in my direction and says,  “Make a wish.”

It’s already come true, I think, but I blow out the candle anyway. I’d make ten thousand wishes if he asked me.

Because I’m in love with him. Because I’ll always love him.

Because even after all these years, he still likes this better than fighting. 

[daddydylanklebold]

Blooms for Expressing Different Emotions

Now and then, words stay lacking to clarify feelings, and afterward individuals endeavor to discover some unique ways. For communicating the emotions, a standout amongst the most ideal ways is blossoms. Indeed, even only a solitary blossom can express that you are delaying to state since quite a while. Regardless of whether you need to demonstrate your adoration, friendship, feel sorry or sympathy, there is a bloom for each event. This is a direct result of the distinctive hues that stand up what is in the psyche or heart of an individual. The most recent administrations http://www.sendflowersuk.org.uk/asda-sainsburys-tesco-flowers/ of bloom conveyance have made it a lot simpler than previously. Presently request your preferred rose and send to the individuals who consume some extraordinary space in your life. On the off chance that you need to feel sorry however have no guts to remain before them, basically send a group of roses alongside the sorry inclination card. Make a point to pick those blossoms that mean the sentiment of sorry. One may confound while picking the correct blossom in this circumstance. Here is a rundown of certain roses that you can send for a statement of regret:-

Hyacinth

Tulips

Lily

A bundle of flawlessly masterminded roses is sufficient to excuse you however ensure that you are sending them with a sorry inclination letter or welcome. Cherishing somebody is extremely a stunning inclination yet the greater part of the general population dither to express their emotions in view of an obscure dread. As a matter of fact, this isn't as convoluted as individuals expect. All you need is a rose and a card of communicating love. Ensure that the rose is red in shading since it speaks to cherish, so simply send a rose and they will immediately comprehend that you need to state. For the first run through, however you can likewise take blooms inevitably while you meet your sweetheart. It is the most ideal approach to advise them that how profoundly this relationship matters to you. Blooms work in each circumstance whether it is happiness or melancholy. If there should be an occurrence of an unsavory circumstance like distress or sympathy, numerous individuals can't discover proper words to clarify their sentiments. For them, blooms can work in a superior manner. Jonquil, white rose and pink carnation are a few animal groups that you can arrange for these sorts of circumstances. For communicating your inclination on the events like birthday or commemoration, some uncommon courses of action are imperative. Alongside wonderful blooms, a delightful cake is additionally obligatory. The pastry specialists are presently giving cake conveyance on 24X7 premise. You simply need to choose the cake that flawlessly fits with the event. While requesting, dependably determine a portion of the prerequisites, for example,

State of cake

Amount Flavor

Veg or Non veg

Shading

The festival events like birthday and commemoration are the reason of satisfaction. So if the individual is near you, organize an enhancement subject in the gathering with blooms to express your adoration. You can choose a solitary shading with various tones or distinctive hues as per the idea of that individual. The bliss of infant is unexplainable and the honesty of a tyke is extremely charming. On the off chance that an infant has as of late touched base at your home, inviting them with ideals of blossoms is an incredible thought. You can benefit bloom conveyance with species like oak seed, azalea, white carnation and daisy. Every one of them speak to new life, guiltlessness and care. Blooms are a standout amongst the most astounding manifestations of Mother Nature and even the least complex blossom will likewise inspire you with its magnificence and aroma. That is the reason nothing is superior to anything blossoms to express what is covered up in your heart.

[targetwetales]

"Ma'am, let me insert the cheese code"

Buckle the HECK down, because my time in Tescos is one hell of an experience. I’m one of those people who stand by the little cheap 10p bags in the self-service aisle and have the fancy little headset and coat. I was never told of the horrors with the CHEESE BARCODE NOT SCANNING.

When this happened, I think it was my first three months working there, so I barely had any of the ‘non-scanning’ items memorized. I had not been prepared for THE CHEESE NOT SCANNING. I also remember the incident of the day so well. The lunch break I spent asking all the cashiers, “what’s the cheese code??”

Imagine it, 8AM. The schools haven’t started, so all kids are getting stuff for their lunch. Kitkats, cola, the odd cake for the odd birthday, socks.. But three kids in the space of half an hour were getting cheese. Not grated cheese in a bag and some bread, no. A block of cheese. The cheese in the broken cooler that we had to move twenty minutes earlier, so the bottom of it (where the barcode was), had been soaked, and stuck together slightly. So, I was very unaware of this. Why would I ever care about the cheese that never sells until 10AM? It had to be dry by then. Anyways, this kid comes in, cheese in hand, tomato in the other. The poor boy was probably cooking in school. Scans his tomatoes easily. Tries to scan the cheese. Cheese doesn’t scan. Alright yeah, whoops, scan it proper kid. Tries to scan the cheese again. Cheese doesn’t scan. And again. And again. I eventually see the kid looking at me with hope, so I go in and enter the cheese code from the bottom of the pack. I give the kid his cheese, and he’s on his way. No more than five minutes later, the odd Harry comes up with a pizza base and cheese, not to mention squeezy tomato. He scans his base and squeezy tomato easily, but not the cheese, oh no. That doesn’t scan. I just think they got one of the few ones we moved last, so they were messed about a bit. I enter the kids code, he’s on his way. Same with the other kid that came in. I just thought it was unlucky.

But no, Lord behold, the 'let me speak to the manager cut’ woman comes in with a BASKET. Love, why must you do this. It’s 10AM, just order online. I had already entered 10 cheese codes that day, and I’m thinking maybe the cheese has to refrost or whatever; I don’t work in stocking. So, I put myself on standby for this woman, watch her scan the little milk cartons (semi-skimmed, good choice) and the rest of her good eating looking basket. Then the cheese comes up. Oh god. I walk over to her, say the cheese won’t scan for the others, so it’s easier for me to put in the code. But no, no, she can make it scan. “My boy works in retail you see, one of those fancy shops in the big places? Yeah, those. Real good, told me how to scan.��� OK love, whatever you say. I go back to my corner and mess around with the bags. Two minutes later, the lady still can’t get her cheese to scan. I go back over to help, but no, no. She has this. I tactically retreat to my bag corner. Another two minutes, and I put away the 'something in the bagging area’ thing for her. I watch her good, healthy veg as she goes to get two different blocks of cheese. She comes back. Her cheese is not scanning, so I offer yet again to code her cheese.

“Ma'am, let me put in the code. It’ll count as being scanned then.” No. She will not yield to my cheese scanning. I ask her once more. She will regret not accepting my offer. I tell her OK, I retreat to my corner. I begin talking to the cashier. His name was Matt, got sacked for being a twit of a driver. Nice guy, bought me stickers once. No more than five minutes later, the woman’s red light on the scanner goes off. She had tried to enter the cheese code and failed. She had entered the tomato code. Feel my wrath, Helen. I go over, and I enter the cheese code. I am free from her, she has left. But, she had brought MORE cheese buyers. Five more people fell to my idiotic cheese entering, I did not know the cheese code. I entered what I had. My lunchbreak had finally come up, and the first thing I said when leaving was good luck to the security man. If an item doesn’t scan, it’s usually taken out and people claim that “It’s free.”

The cheese saga ends here, but to this day, I continue to watch people fail at scanning the legendary cheese. I am the cheese slayer, I get people their dairy goodness. I do not like any of it, but I enjoy watching kids do my job for me.

I am the Tesco cheese slayer. I know non of the cheese codes, but I will slay them anyways.

[teaandforeshadowing]

notyourplotbunny answered your question “so I kind of want to try my hand at writing some drabbles? send...”

john makes sherlock a cake for his birthday. could go good or burnt cake horrible, you pick

please don’t ask me why I’m writing all of these from John’s perspective

John has never been one for baking. 

He’s got a surgeon’s steady hands, and a soldier’s eye for detail, but sweet heaven above, he was just monstrous at baking. Cookies became black lumps under his watchful eye, and icing became soup under his delicate touch.

Which is why I should have bought one at Tesco instead of baking one, he thought, trying to shape the mush in front of him into something resembling decorations. Mrs. Hudson had helped him a bit with the actual cake part, but he’d wanted to do at least something for himself. It was Sherlock’s birthday, the first one since he’d found out when exactly that was, and he wanted to surprise him with something personal.

As footsteps sounded on the landing, panic raced through John’s heart, and he wondered if it be more worth it to trash the whole project, stop Sherlock before he set foot in the kitchen, and lure him out to dinner instead while Mrs. H cleaned up after him. 

There was a slight pause at the door before it opened all the way. Too late.

Slow, heavy steps into the kitchen, still weighed down by a coat and shoes, and John found he couldn’t move his hands anymore. (Even if he could, it was a lost cause.)

A dark figure finally appeared in the doorway, standing tall and oh-so-beautiful, especially sprinkled with melting snowflakes.

“Surprise?”

Sherlock stared unblinkingly at the mess on the table (no, the one next to his experiments) for a few seconds before quirking a small smile.

“As thoughtful as this is,” he started, stepping over to John and curling an arm around his waist, “let’s order some take away, hm?”

John sighed into the embrace as Sherlock planted a small kiss on his forehead. “Good. Yes. Thank god.”

[adamthepastryguy]

So my Harry Potter themed  Afternoon Tea  has come and gone. The most immersive and most expensive Tea i have done to date. It took the longest to prepare for the decor and foods and hopefully is the most elaborate to date.

I visited the  Harry Potter Studio tour on Thursday for the 1st time and did pick up some wizarding world items to enhance the Tea for the sweets challenge. The props alone for this Tea have made it the most expensive to date and find how much at the end of the blog.

Just  like the films it takes many people to make it all happen, and would like to thanks my parents and also partner for their help in the decor and filming on the day. It took most of the 2nd half of the week to do the decor, prepare the props and plan, shop and bake/prepare the treats on offer.

The Tea has been in the planning for over a year, but on paper mainly, since i was visiting the Studio Tour the same week i decided to end the week with the Tea.

I searched the internet and many of Pinterest posts for inspiration for  treats and foods to make alongside my original ideas. I have never read the books but seen the films. A lot of the references i found came from the books and small snippets from the movies. I wrote them all down and done a shortlist and came up with my menu. I was happy with all i did but you always want more. I ran out of space on the table  I need a long banquet table !

SETTING THE SCENE

Whilst planning i came up with the name Platform 9 Tea/4 as my backdrop was to be the Hogwarts Express. I already had a trolley from my market stalls so used that with some loaded up luggage to set the scene I wanted a cage for Hedwig but knew it would be a waste getting it for a one off, so found an adorable but expensive Hedwig from Platform 9 3/4 shop online  for £35 originally £45 and the biggest one they make and exclusive to the shop also.  The backdrop came from Ebay as per my others.

I saw the Hogwarts letter pack in Sainsburys and decided to make my own Acceptance letters and also brought a wax sealer online and made 20 to hang on a wall to set the scene further. I made some floating Candles from hot glue and Paper towel holders and tealights and hung from the ceiling. These were all hung with invisible thread so did indeed appear to be floating besides the obvious sellotape mark on the ceiling.

I had the idea also to have Hogwarts on the table  and that came in 3d puzzle form. I was lucky to win 2 auctions on eBay hoping all the pieces were there! it took me 5 days to complete both of them myself and 1 piece was missing. I paired them with my Lego like Harry Potter Mini figures and think they went great together even if the scale is somewhat out lol. I had imagined this in the centre of the table and  cake stands on each end, but was naive and it had to go at the far end of the table but looked good anyway.

  SORTING HAT

I do have one of the original talking sorting Hats but it doesn’t work, i saw Argos had a sale on the new version for £17.49 i got it as they are usually £40+ within a week or so it was back to normal price so glad i got it. I used it as a prop and to sort everyone into their Houses before we begun the Tea.

    THE TEA

I was lucky to get hold of the Harry potter Teapots, 1 from Primark and 1 from eBay( from primark) and the House crest Mugs these were all reasonable compared to most around. I found a Round Marauders map Beach towel ( yes round) i used as a tablecloth with my Black cloth underneath. I knew i wanted a Birdcage cake stand for the Tea and found one on Amazon using my vouchers i got 2 and £30 off. I did not try my plates on it and last minute figured the big plates would not fit, so had to use the side plates as the stand plates and big plates as our plates to eat off

I just had a choice of Loose leaf plain Tea and regular Tea for this Tea.

MUSIC

My Dad is the sound man and he had the Harry Potter Soundtrack from the films playing in the Background which created some ambiance.

  THE FOOD

After gathering references and ideas it took 3 days plus of preparation to make it all happen with all the sweets and savories enough to feed Dumbledoores army!

The savouries

For the Sandwiches i made  Endless Bacon , Corned Beef ( Ron’s least favourite) and Chicken & Ham

Cheese wand Scones

Pumpkin Pasties – These are mentioned as being eaten on the Hogwarts express and no mention of sweet or savoury, a lot of recipes made them Pumpkin Pie type fillings. I saw some savoury i made mine into Curried Pumpkin which were really nice.

Mini Steak Pies

THE SWEET STUFF

Their was endless possibilities for sweet items and i whittled it down to several, haa i still had loads.

Golden Snitch Cake ball Truffles – Sprayed gold and complete with Rice paper wings.

Treacle Tarts – Harry`s favorite apparently who knew?

Hagrids Rock Cakes – A definite improvement on Hagrids version these mini Rock cakes were great.

Harry`s Birthday Cake – I made a small Vegan Chocolate Cake complete with Strawberry Pink icing and a rustic message ” Happee Birthdae Harry” with the crack down the middle.

Lemon Sherbet Eclairs – Filled with Vanilla Cream and topped with Lemon Sherbet icing and crumbled Sherbet sweets dust.

ButterBeer mini Cupcakes – If you have never had Butter beer it is a cross between a cream soda and Butterscotch topped with a cream like top layer. To replicate this i made a Butterscotch flavour sponge topped with Butterscotch buttercream and coloured yellow.

Chocolate Frogs– right from the start on the Train these were a definite to add to the Tea. I made my own in some moulds with Rice Crispies/Coco pops pieces inside. typically they contain a Holographic wizard Cards in their boxes.

Philosophers Scones – Love the name i found online. I topped my Scones with a lightening scar for added effect.

I recorded the Tea live, but much to my horror afterwards found once the tablet fell the sound had cut out after 9 mins!

Luckily my partner had made his own videos and i borrowed them from him allowing the whole thing to be relived in short clips. I always film them via Facebook live and with a new tripods thought this would be okay. Tripod needs sorting out for next time seemed to be top heavy with my tablet resting on it. Happy with the combined footage

SWEETS CHALLENGE

As part of the Tea i wanted to have a Bertie Botts sweet challenge afterwards ( The disgusting flavours) and also take the chance to try some other Harry Potter inspired  Sweets. I got from Universal studios the original Frog and the studio tour here i got the rest of the Honeydukes Sweets and around other places. I looked at reviews of some and picked the ones which got the best scores. Some for what they was i left. I was lucky to get some cheap and discounted in Tkmaxx in a hamper bundle for £5

The sweets i got were

Chocolate Frog in Box – Universal Studios Orlando

Chocolate Frog packs x2 – Chocolate & Puffed Rice Pieces

Fizzing whizzbees

Peppermint Toads

Exploding Bon Bons Orange & Pineapple

Bertie Botts every flavour Bean

Jelly Slugs

Gringotts Chocolate Coins

Lemon Sherbets

 SO HOW WAS THEY?

The Bertie Botts Bean challenge  we picked 3 Beans each and from the reactions we all got mostly disgusting ones. I got Grass and Toothpaste which tasted like deep heat lol. I mixed them in with Bean Boozled which have nice and nasty flavours.

The Chocolate frog in box from the states is Big and fills the box but however is American Chocolate! so could not eat much of that for it is not the best eating Chocolate.

The Puffed Rice Chocolate frog with Cards were also not that great and i could not believe the size of them once opened compared to the size of the packet. Disgraceful for the price.

The Exploding Pineapple & Orange Bonbons in White Chocolate were very nice but not much fizz with the Popping Candy for any of us.

Fizzing whizzbees – I liked the Chocolate shaped like Bees but again not much of a whizz or Fizz, think it must have flown away.

Mint Chocolate Toads – Dark Chocolate and extremely strong Mint taste, okay but a bit overpowering for most of us.

Jelly slugs- various flavours and small little Chewy gummy sweets these were okay.

Gringotts Chocolate Coins – Come in a little sack with an emblem on it, the Chocolate was okay on these a novelty more than anything.

Lemon sherbets – i got these from Tesco they are nice just plain Sherbets

These sweets were interesting to try but expensive for what you get

Fizzing Whizzbees £8

Peppermint Toads £5

Frogs packs £4.50

jelly beans packs £3-4 each

Sherbets – available anywhere  really from £1 or less

Explosing BonBons £8

Jelly Slugs £3-4 a pack

Chocolate frog in Box £8-10

It was an eventful evening and after such a lot of planning it came to an end. I invited my work colleague and friend Sharon to participate in the Tea rather than watch it from fb live. Hope she enjoyed her time on Platform 9 tea/4 and she went home with a goodie bag of treats and souvenirs.

This was the most expensive tea i have done in the 2 years i have been doing this project for fun. it came in at the cost of WAIT FOR IT!  £356.30 

The cost of food was low compared to the Props, Teaware and other  items that made this whole Tea what it was. Of course i have the props and plushies to keep for another time. Some i will sell on the things i do not need to keep. The rest will stay for the return to Hogwarts one day.

  My Platform 9 Tea/4 Harry Potter theme Afternoon Tea – behind the scenes So my Harry Potter themed  Afternoon Tea  has come and gone. The most immersive and most expensive Tea i have done to date.

[chill-that-ur-inmyhead]

How many friends do you have on Facebook? 471

What was on the last sandwich you ate? sausage 

What sort of music did you listen to when you were in high school? pop 

Do you prefer gold or silver jewellery? gold 

Have you ever gotten back together with an ex? nope 

How far away is the closest store to your house and what is it? a newsagents is less than 3 mins away 

What is your favourite Thai dish? havent had thai yet i need to explore but dont have the money right now

How many contacts do you have in your phone? approx 65

When was the last time you made out with somebody? sunday 

What month of the year was your mother born? February like me 

Do you have any friends that seem to know all the hot gossip? we all know things

Are there any candles in your bedroom, and what scent are they? Yeah one that smells like ocean i think

What tv show(s) have you been watching currently? archer and criminal minds

When was the last time you went to a birthday party? november 

How many apps do you have on your phone? around 90

What pet names do you use with your significant other? baby butt

Do you have to wear a name badge where you work? a lanyard

Do you have a dress code or have to wear a uniform where you work? the company’s clothes

What brand is your toaster, if you have one? who know’s

Have you ever dated a smoker? If not, would you? yeah i am dating one but he’s quitting, sometimes he relapses and has one smoking socially so its not too bad. i always say that i dont wanna date someone who smokes or does drugs but i guess this one i kinda forgot. 

Are there any movies you’ve seen so many times? the classic disney movies, all the shrek movies, zootropolis, notting hill and the proposal 

What was the last thing you purchased with cash? charles dickens’ souvenirs

Can you hear anything right now? archer

Is there anybody else in the room you’re currently in? fiji water

What’s the name of the store you usually get your groceries? sainsbury’s, tescos and co op.

Would you rather travel to Japan or Scotland? Japan.

Does your house have a porch/balcony? my home does not my uni home

What’s your usual order when you go to a coffee shop? frappacino or mocha or if they have them a smoothie/ milkshake

Have you ever seen a theatre show? ofc most recently Hamilton

What was the last movie you saw and who did you watch it with? The Meg with my flatmates

What is your mother’s first name? Lynda

Do you like to dance? oh yes

How would you describe your sense of humour? banterous

What’s your favourite type of bread? 50/50

Do you receive catalogues and brochures in your mailbox? yes 

What colour is the sky right now? dark 

Do you share a middle name with any of your siblings? nah

Have there ever been any bushfires/wildfires in your area? nah 

Have you ever taken a ride in an ambulance?                                              nah

How would you label your sexual orientation? hetro

When was the last time you took a nap during the day? yesterday, never a good idea 

What did you have to eat for dinner last night? fish cakes, waffles and peas/ sweetcorn

Have you ever been a member in a band? no way

Are you double-jointed? nah

What was the last thing you had to drink? peppermint tea 

Do you currently have any bruises on your body? no

Who was the last message you received from and what did they say? from my boyf saying ‘okay baby’

What colour are your eyes? green/blue

Can you cry on command? If so, have you ever used it to your advantage? i could tear up go a bit misty but nah

Do you consider your goals easily achievable or are they pretty grand? achievable i know my limits

What’s your favourite kind of accent? well spoken

What time does the sun go down where you live at this time of the year? around 5

Do you prefer beer, wine or spirits? spirits

When was the last time you ate Mexican food? years ago 

Have you ever watched yourself on video? Yes.

What time did you wake up today? 10

What time will you go to sleep tonight? probably 1am

Do you have separate emails for personal and business? i have a main, uni and shopping

Are you the eldest, youngest or a middle child? im the baby of the family

What’s your favourite vegetable? fruit 

What colours are you wearing today? purple and navy 

Do you have a subscription to any streaming services like Netflix? i recently got netflix and my dad pays for amazon prime 

Would you rather eat Italian or Indian food? italian 

Are you sitting, standing or lying down right now? Sitting legs stretched out 

Have you ever missed a flight? no way what a nightmare 

Are you someone who always needs a coffee before you can function? nah

Do your neighbours have any pets? Have you ever met them? my neighbour back home has a dog and yes  

When was the last time you washed your hair? yesterday 

What colour is your bedroom door? cream 

Have you ever seen a lunar eclipse? nah

Do you know your significant other’s passwords?                                         to his phone yes and his laptop but i forget the latter.

What was the last thing you said aloud? ‘i can’t tell if she is going netball or not’

Do you know anyone who writes huge essays when they message you? i do when im ranting 

What’s your favourite type of salad? nicoise