#biologic stickers

[alydiekitty]

Don’t forget to wish your friends and/or family members with semen demons a Happy Mother’s Day

[reallyromealone]

Another part to the Spencer Reid x reader accidental mating plz

Title: accidental mating

Chapter 3 1/2

Fandom: criminal minds

Characters: criminal minds cast, extra characters with no names

Fic type: omegaverse

Pairings: Spencer x male reader

Warnings: male reader, reader insert, omegaverse, fluff, angst, reader faces gender discrimination, mpreg, a half chapter for now

Notes: been writing this in my off time

Summary: the team has a new mission and feelings are slowly rising while Spencer learns something about his mate while trying to not throttle someone

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

It had been a month and a half since the two agreed to live together and it's been... Rocky to say the least.

"He puts bread in the fridge!" (Name) Groaned angrily, sitting with Prentiss in her car while they went to get lunch to satisfy (name)s newly developed cravings. "He is a weirdo, other than fridge bread is everything good?"

Minus Spencer avoiding him or treating him like glass and somehow keeping him at an arms length... Everything was fine...

"Just tell him you wanna be with him!" Morgan groaned out and Spencee looked less than thrilled at his best friends words, ever since (name) and him moved into the house together, (name)s scent was hard to ignore and frankly driving Spencer up the wall in the most annoyingly best way possible.

He was just tired of how his alpha reacted to it all, his body practically moving on its own to try and make sure (name) was well cared for always only for him to snap back and push away.

"I don't want to be with him! My alpha is just reacting to the fact he's carrying my children! It's purely biological!" Morgan just stared unimpressed with him, it was clear as day that Spencer had been developing feelings but was too far up his own ass to figure it out. Who would have figured that the smartest man in the room would be so dumb. "Well how are things going at home?" Morgan asked the other who groaned "he keeps moving things, always complaining how it doesn't feel right"

It was another form of nesting, especially with pregnant people. Instead of just making cute nests, they cleaned the house with an aggression like no other and treated the furniture like they were playing sims. (Name) Was no exception, rearranging the house and subsequently dragging Reid along as the Alpha didn't want him hurting himself or the babies "he's really putting you to work" Morgan teased much to the other alphas frustration.

Giggling could be heard across the bullpen, the two looking over to see (name) and Prentiss with a few sandwiches "there you two are, where have you guys been off too?" Morgan teased while (name) took a sandwich out of the plastic bag and handed it to Reid "you didn't eat breakfast" (name) said simply and the Alpha looked down at the sandwich from the deli a few blocks down, the sticker on it showing it had everything he liked on it.

"O-oh uh... Thanks" (name) looked confused at the doctor but didn't pay him too much mind as his belly rumbled and immediately went to his desk to go eat his monstrosity of a sandwich, everyone both horrified and fascinated at the combination of things between some sourdough.

"Pregnancy is a fascinating yet horrifying thing" Spencer said taking a bite of his sandwich while his mate enjoyed his foo-- not his mate.

They weren't mates.

...

Fuck.

"I heard he seduced him and baby trapped him"

"Well I heard that he blackmailed him"

(Name) Ignored the gossip and whispers about him, Hitch needing to use the restroom and (name) walking ahead back to the alphas office "clearly he had to do... Favors to get this job" if it wasn't him being accused of being a whore it was something...

He loved his pups but he wished it was different and he could have done this on his own time...

"(Name)?" Spencer's voice broke him out of his thoughts, a look of concern on his face... Spencer... God despite being well him, (name) would be a liar if he said he didnt feel attraction to him. "Are you alright?" The Alpha asked concerned, his alpha slipping out subconsciously and (name) just sighed at him. "I'm fine" (name) said calmly, these comments weren't anything new to him and he didn't need his alpha by technicality going all bubble wrap and worry even if it wasn't actually him caring... It was nice though he wouldn't lie.

Another mission, another plane ride.

"You sure he's good?" JJ asked worried while (name) threw up in the washroom "just morning sickness, it will pass" spencer mumbled, already having water and crackers ready.

"Remember (name), you are not to leave our sides" hotch warned seriously and (name) nodded, a calm and casual look on his face and to everyones surpise went closer to Reid, gently looping his arm around the alphas.

"What? It's easier to just have you be seen as my alpha to avoid issues" (name) explaimed but Spencer didn't decide to push, the omegas scent just faint enough for Spencer to smell and his back straightened slightly because of it.

(Name) Felt eyes on him, his belly and the whispers already began "the Omega do something?" A cop asked and hotch glared at him "FBI, we are here on special business, this is my assistant" the Alpha was deeply protective of his assistant and would not tolerate any harassment of him, especially with what happened last time. (Name) Seemed unphased and frankly more calm than he should as the team went to go see the Sheriff to collect more information and begin the investigation.

The sheriff was an older alpha, mustache and rougher skin from not wearing sunscreen in the hot weather, years of work showing on each wrinkle "my, the big guns in our little town? I'm honored" his voice laced with nothing but pure sarcasm and disdain while combing through the team slowly before looking at (name) with an expression that the Omega couldn't recognize "didn't know they let 'megas in the FBI" he grumbled and (name) bit his cheek "he's my assistant" hotch said seriously "we both want those teens to be found, you want this to be over and we want to do our jobs now... Shall we get to work?"

"Fine but the omega doesn't see the evidence" the sheriff said simply and (name) mentally began counting "hes not a cop, he's a citizen and this is under my rules and besides... You know state laws with omegas 'round these parts, don't you?"

"..." Hotch looked ready to explode, (name) never seen him so furious "Reid, take (name) to his hotel" hotch hissed out, eyes not leaving the sheriff's while the rest of the team looked pissed to say the least.

(Name) Was silent, ignoring the snickers from the cops around them while they went to one of the SUVs, Reid's knuckles white while helping (name) in "I can't believe it!" The Alpha grumbled and (name) shrugged "you get used to it... The amount of jobs I was denied for being an Omega... I was shocked hotch took a chance on me" it's why he worked so hard, he always wanted his boss and the person he admired deeply to know he was capable.

That he was worthy of being there.

"You shouldn't be used to this!"

"Trust me, I wish I wasn't but I'm not an alpha who has every door open for him" like Reid, an attractive alpha who was smarter than every person in the room "hell if it weren't for my sister, I wouldn't have even been able to apply without it getting tossed"

"Whose your sister?" (Name) Was happy to distract the genius who seemed genuinely curious about (name)s life "well she's more my step sister but her names Temperance, her parents took me in when I was five... She's the closest family I have"

"Wait... Temperance as in temperance Brennan?" Reid was incredulous at this, how did he not know that his friend was related to his mate?!

Well to be fair, they weren't blood related so they wouldn't look the same...

"She contacted Boothe and he got into contact with hotch who was willing to give me an interview..."

"If... You didn't get the job, what would you have done?"

"My sister would have dragged me to be her assistant or something... I avoided it though because i know her and I would butt heads, she mind of reminds me of you" (name) mumbled and Reid didn't know if he was touched or not but took it as a compliment anyways "I just can't believe Hotch just sent you off like that though!"

"Oh he didn't, he is sending me all the information once Garcia scans it through"

Oh.

Well now Reid felt silly.

"Can we get pizza? Babies want pizza with honey"

And a bit disgusted.

[samimarkart]

trans ocean animals sticker up in my shop! clownfish and slipper limpets can both change their biological sex, and male seahorses give birth 🤍🩵🩷 wanted to have a subtle pride design and thought about fishy guys….

[bubblergoespop]

redacted headcanons wooo

some angsty, some cutesy, some whatever idk

elliott makes sunshine sleepy when they’re around him. not because of his powers but just because he makes them feel comfortable and safe. and being around him relieves them of the fear of having any nightmares again, because he won’t let it happen.

as the rest of the damn crew ages, gavin mimics the way they all age. wrinkling his skin, fading the colour from his hair, etc.

i don’t know much about plants but they can get sick right? like viral infections or something? anyway, one day, the plant that anton's love gave him was looking extremely wilted and anton sobbed practically everyday and poured his heart and soul into helping it until he was able to get it to recover again.

vincent was secretly envious of how well lovely seemed to be coping with their turning. not anymore though.

lasko's partner sleeptalks. lasko was shocked the first time they did it around him because it’s such a contrast to how quiet they are when awake.

sweetheart was in a rush to get to work one day and accidentally grabbed one of milo's shirts instead of their own. when they came home later on, milo realised they were wearing his top. ofc that awoke something in him and, since then, he’s had sweetheart put on multiple fashion shows in which they try on his clothes.

lasko's partner is the type of teacher who gives their students stickers and sweets, and they also doodle on any written exams when they mark them.

porter wasn’t alone when he was turned. he was with someone he cared about. and they cared for him. but they didn’t get turned. his maker murdered them and that’s why porter says “historically” it doesn’t turn out well for those who care for him.

the asset helps take care of anton's plant. they find actual biological life fascinating, and they can stare at a plant for as long as they like since it won’t get annoyed or uncomfortable like a human does.

gav stayed at the damn campus for longer than usual once and freelancer was left home alone with the time to over think and they ended up crying themself to sleep over their mortality and gavin’s immortality. gavin had no idea until they woke up the next morning. when they looked at him, he felt their core ache.

ever since angel tried on davey's clothes for the first time, david’s gone out of his way to hide angel’s clothes at times and/or “forget” to wash them with the rest of the laundry. and then he goes “oops guess you’ll just wear one of my shirts in the meantime…” with the stupidest smirk on his face ever

porter gets regular nightmares. from the trauma of his human life, the time with his maker and/or from the things he’s done for william. it’s the reason he says sleep won’t bring him peace, even though for most people, it would.

[romanarose]

Nice Job!

Steven Grant x fem!reader

Join my tag list!

Moon Knight masterlist

Summary: Steven had a praise kink

Warnings: Oral (fem receiving), praise kink, being a silly goose

I mention "the kids" super duper vaguely as a reason to have stickers in a purse. In my head reader is a teacher bc i am XD but this can mean biological kids, nieces or nephews, little cousins, etc whatever you want!

quick smut below the cut

*********

"Feel so fucking good, Steven, my good boy, my Steven" You praise your boyfriend as you spready out for him on the couch, Steven worshiping at your shrine, paying his respects with the sacrifice of his own stimulation for the sake of your pleasure. He could jerk himself off if he wanted to, but he seemed unwilling to remove his fingers from your cunt and clit. Steven was a busy man.

"Steven, need you closer Steven, almost-oh fuck- almost there baby" You tug on his curls, drawing him impossibly closer into you, so much so you were certain he was going to suffocate between your pussy lips, but it didn't matter, not to him. It's how he'd want to go. When you cum you're bucking your cunt against him, fucking yourself on his early awaiting face. As he licked up every drop of your cum, you here him whining, a gentle whimper from his throat as he ate your though your orgasm.

"Good boy, such a good boy, my Steven, oooooh"

Letting go of his hair, you rest back on the couch, panting, only to find he's still licking between your folds, practically humping your leg, so desperate to please. You gentle nudge him back.

"Rest, baby, you did perfect, you deserve to rest."

With a soft smile, Steven rested his head on your thigh, still knelt between your legs, smiling up adoringly at you.

"You sound so beautiful when you cum, love"

You smile right back. "So do you, love" you tease his pet name to you, booping his nose,

"How did you know I came?" He asked with a curious grin and a joyful crinkle in his eyes.

"Laughing, you reply. "You always cum in your pants when you eat me out that intensely, pretty boy."

Steven beamed up at you at the praise. "Can't help it that you're this pretty, darling girl."

You pet Steven's hair, combing through the lush curls as he laid his head on you, massaging his scalp when you get an idea. Reaching into your purse, you pulled out the sticker pack you had gotten for the kids. You pick out a particular one, showing Steven the star that says, "Nice job!" and stick it on his forehead.

Looking up at you quizzically, Steven simply informs you. "You're a bit of an odd one, aren't you?"

But all you can do is smile at your precious boyfriend with his cum-soaked face, a bright yellow sticker on top.

**************

this one is for the girlies in the whorefully yours discord specifically @campingwiththecharmings and @whatthefishh who came up with this idea

I hope y’all liked bc I did this and finished Take Your Time today despite being sick

Don’t let this one flop 😂

@fandxmslxt69 @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @whatthefishh @k-ra @eyelessfaces @ivystoryweaver @steven-grants-world @campingwiththecharmings @ahookedheroespureheart @littlenosoul @runa-falls

[french-unknown]

Hello there... Can I please request a part 2 for the growing old together? With Law, Sabo, Corazon and Mihawk.

𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐓𝐎𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒: law, sabo, rosinante, mihawk 𝐂/𝐖: fluff, hurt 𝐀/𝐍: Hello there! (￣∇￣)ゞ 𝐖/𝐂: 760 +

| m a s t e r l i s t | - | p t . 1 |

𝐋𝐀𝐖

✧ Already, he will be the kind of old man who will grumble until the last day of his life.

✧ Even old, he will love you. Maybe not with as much passion as before but he will love you.

✧ His motto is “You're the one who annoys me the best”

✧ He's the type to grumble in the corner and, if you don't say anything back to him or make fun of him about his habit of muttering under his breath, he will worry. He'll be relieved only if you say something nasty in return.

✧ He will be a big loner in your life as a couple so he will not want children whether they are adopted or not.

✧ If you bring him an animal on the other hand (a black cat, by chance) he will be grumpy at first because it's a flea bag and needs to be taken care of. However, you will notice when your back is turned that he is talking to the cat. Finally, after several months of living together, the cat will become an integral part of your family.

✧ The guest room will be renamed by Bepo’s room.

𝐒𝐀𝐁𝐎

✧ He will be loyalty incarnate.

✧ Every time you have long-distance arguments and he hangs the Den Den Mushi in your face, you will seriously want to slit his throat. He will be like this in old age. Yet, family will always be stronger than anything and he will always come back to you. He will always think that he cares too much about you to let you down for nothing. Even if he refuses to admit that he was wrong.

✧ The question of children will be a thorny point in your life as a couple because he is very afraid of reproducing the pattern he experienced in his family. He will be terrified of seeing his child as an heir or, worse, of ending up with a child with the same personality as his parents or biological brother.

✧ If you have any, Luffy and Ace will be their uncles in the same way that Dadan and Garp will be their grandparents.

✧ Whatever your age, he will be extremely protective of you and will want to keep you as safe as possible.

✧ You will always come before his dreams.

𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄

✧ He will love you more and more throughout his life.

He will first love you enormously when he meets you then he will love you a little more for your loyalty when you are there to help him during his recovery after he was injured by Doflamingo. He will love you a notch higher when you form his ideal family with your second child (the first will forever remain Law). Finally, he will love you to the fullest when you find yourself just the two of you during your last days in a house filled to the brim with photos and memories of his life that he had always dreamed of.

✧ Absolutely ALL of Law's Wanted Posters will be hung with stickers on your fridge. ALL!

✧ After you have your first house all to yourself, you will pray that he doesn't accidentally set it on fire. He will pray with you. Eventually, he will simply stop smoking when he learns that you will have a child at home since he will not want to influence his health.

✧ He will be the type who, even at 80, will serve you breakfast in bed with the food cut into the shape of little hearts.

𝐌𝐈𝐇𝐀𝐖𝐊

✧ Mihawk is a loner who, even if he has the best intentions, will have great difficulty communicating. He will lock himself into a routine where feelings will not have much room to express themselves.

✧ You will end up getting divorced and leaving Kuraigana. He won't try to hold you back or try to explain away your wrongs. From the moment you tell him you want to divorce during dinner, he will simply respond "Okay" before continuing his meal.

✧ It is Perona who will find you and accuse you of the fact that he hasn't left his castle for months. You will then understand that he cares about you despite his acceptance of the separation.

✧ However, even if you both try to give your relationship another chance, it will not work because your needs are too different.

✧ You will settle for a relationship where you will be separated but you will meet up every few years to check in on each other.

✧ Zoro will be quite free but Perona will really have the energy of the child of a divorced couple who is in shared custody.

𝐉𝐎𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈���𝐓 𝐈𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐒 𝐀𝐍𝐘 𝐔𝐏𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄

𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @iheartamora @bontensh0e @opchara @lys-ada @xomingyu @dozcan123

[deadtiredghost]

Tmnt facts that are canon cause i said so:

All Leo's are sci-fi fans of varying degrees of old sci-fi series/movies

But MM!Leo thinks the old movies are old and thus has no major franchise to obsess over, he is just big into any of the more modern movies of the genre: I'm thinking Interstellar, Blade Runner, idk many more. And then he started watching Final Space and eventually got into Futurama.

But he still would think the other Leo's are old and a bit lame for enjoying old anime so much.

All the Donnie's and Leo's are the musical fans, but that doesn't mean that Raph and Mikey can't enjoy a musical too! Especially 2003!Raph who grew up watching shit like high school musical and teen beach movie with Leo and Donnie.

The 2003 boys all teamed up to sit on Mikey and tape Mikey's mouth shut cause he would dramatically and badly sing the songs otherwise.

2018 crew are hard into Hamilton of course while 2012 have a knock off version of it that flopped but Mikey loves.

2003 have a musical version of Lost Boys and Faries that could possibly be comparable with some rap songs and some emotional ballads.

Bayverse and MM have batman while 2018 have a weird mixture of some irl media and some really obvious knock offs. 2012 has Wingnut and Silber sentry as comics to replace Marvel and DC in their universe and we all know how 2003 is on superheroes.

All the Mikey's are naturally talented at drawing apart from 2012 who's skills apparently just got transferred to literally every single one of his siblings.

2012!Mikey's writing looks like chickenscratch and his drawings are chaotic in an abstract art kinda way, while 12!Leo can draw anime, 12!Karai is decent at drawing anything reallt, 12!Donnie preffers skatching items and backgrounds rather than people and 12!Raph is the one who does art the most in the fam.

The 1987 turtles are stuck in 1987 and have been since 1987. They like crossovers for the change of pace but 87!Raph and 87!Donnie very much dislike how other turtles have treated them in the past so take any and ever chance to fuck with their alternates in retaliation, feigning innocence well enough that they keep getting away with blatantly insulting their iterations to their face.

Leo is the tea drinker in the family across iterations but most of the iterations don't drink coffee - rottmnt gets into coffee wars (sans Leo and Splinter) but other than that 2007!Donnie and Bayverse!Raph are the only rabid coffee drinkers.

most of the Donnies drink energy drinks if they want a caffeine boost - the nonbinaries and their Monster especially.

The MM kids aren't allowed coffee because Splinter read a watched of child-raising YouTube videos and banned it. Of course that doesn't stop them from sneaking out. MM!Donnie is trying to convince him to allow coffee while MM!Raph just sneaks in his energy drinks.

2003!Casey was convinced the turtles were adults for at LEAST the first month into their friendship.

The ampunt Mikey wears stickers is directly proportional to the amount of leeway Splinter gives him - with the used-to-be-human Splinters being more strict on not personalising his weapon while the used-to-be-rat Splinters such as MM gives the go ahead.

The outlines of this rule are 03!Splinter and 18!Splinter of course who have entirely different ways of handling their adhd child.

And then there is bayverse!Splinter who said fuck the stickers, yes of course my 15-year-old children can have tattoos.

(And yes I firmly believe they were 15 in the first movie, and I attribute their tattoos to Splinter not really seeing the harm in it, or caring much as long as it won't hurt them.)

18!Leo is biologically the eldest but no one knows this apart from Draxum who will never tell at this point. Splinter aged them based on size.

On the other hand, 03!Leo is the biological youngest but only Donnie knows this (science shit to find it out) and will never tell anyone because he found out that 03!Mikey hatched first and that information can never be allowed to get to the turtle in question.

2012 Casey is transfem but doesn't know it yet and 2018 Casey is what 12!Casey will look like at 20.

All Donnie's watch anime and all Mikey's watch horror movies - despite how much they may or may not scream at the horror movies.

07!Mikey sells art online and 07!Leo becomes a language tutor in their 20's. Ironic as 12!Raph attempts to sell art online but becomes too emotionally attached to his work and 12!Donnie attempts to tutor for a time but is a terrible teacher.

Leo is a basketball or baseball fan, Raph likes wrestling and basketball, Donnie will partake in basketball or volleyball and Mikey prefers dancing but is open to playing anything... just not watching.

Splinter always watched the tennis, becuase his grandmother did. Leo likes to put it on but doesn't like playing it.

Mikey will forever be confused why the others enjoy watching sport. This stemms from when he was 12 and trying to watch his cartoons and Splinter would always take control of the TV during the Olympics. Mikey is still very salty and has an agenda against the Olympics and any other big sports match on their communal TV.

All the Leo's before 2012 just didnt use the Internet or any electronics as a kid and thus struggles with electronics massively.

Conversely 2012 and 2018 Leo were both on tumblr as kids and read fanfic about Space Heros and Jupiter Jim respectively.

And in addition: Donnie was on the Internet far too much as a kid.

(12!Donnie will never tell but 12!Mikey befriending Chris Bradford on Facebook hit a bit too close to home.)

After Don, Raph is the best at mechanics, other than 18!Raph who is kinda shit at them.

Splinter taught all of the turtles first aid but Raph and Mikey are patched up the most by the other two, which leads to the other two being more confident and skilled at first aid.

Leo's first aid experience is very much similar to an army medic, using improvisation based on his prior knowledge without any of the proper hospital procedure while Donnie's is much more based on his research into medicine and thus much more clinical.

The outliers are the 18!kids cause Donnie finds biological shit kinda disgusting unless he HAS to do it.

And then there is the 87!turtles who don't really get hurt for longer than an episode's run time. Despite this every single one of them are able to accurately and skillfully carry out any medical procedure should the need arise becuase cartoon logic and convenience. It is a skill they have and its usually 87!Donnie ordering them about while 87!Raph plays nurse.

Mikey and Raph spray paint together sometimes in all iterations other than 87.

87!Mikey and 87!Leo have never kmowingly committed a crime.

Mikey looks up to Leo most out of his siblings, and Leo would look up to Mikey in turn if he could get over the jealousy towards his youngest brother.

There is not a single itteration where Leo doesn't sometimes kinda wish he could be more like Mikey - he has never voiced these feelings and hates that he feels this jealousy.

If you wake Leo up from sleeping he will be alert, a bit grumpy about it, but will never turn you away. He rarely gets a full good night's sleep anyways, ans becuase of this he is prime target to bother when he is awake... up until they turn 14 where Leo gets into the habit of pretending to be asleep so Mikey doesn't bother him and starts meditating until he falls asleep.

The prior headcannon excludes rottmnt and mutant mayhem.

Mikey starts bothering Donnie more and joins him in the lab late at night a lot.

If you dare to disturb Raph's beauty sleep you will get a pillow to the face and a shouting to at the least.

Everyone of the turtles loves Kung Fu Panda or whatever similar movie exists in their world. They won't admit it but its because Poe reminds them of Mikey.

Raph maintains that he doesn't like physical contact much to get out of hugging the sweaty humans in his life. He is actually fairly chill with hugs he just hates the feeling of sweat on his scales so much, and learnt that the hard way when Casey brought him in for a hug after a fight and he shoved him off and blustered a bit. But any of his siblings hugging him is fine, he only ever shoves them off out of annoyance.

Donnie is the least huggy turtle, but he will sometimes lean his full body weight on April - which is fine in most iterations but some cannot handle the weight, I'm looking at Bayverse.

If Mikey were a human he would be a borderline nudist when home and everyone who lived with him would complain about it.

Like [insert hair covering here] and a fluffy dressing gown from when he was 9 wrapped around the waist if you're lucky.

[syztemerrxr]

not to doublepost or anything but I MADE A TIMEWHEEL FANKID! theres a bunch of info about her below the cut :P

the name "Chrona" wasnt actually just Given to her by the two, he kinda just got bored of being called timewheel all the time (thought it was a mouthful) and asked for help; hence being given the name Chrona. xe kept forgetting it because at the time he was still being sent back and forth from xeir planet and the s*n. HOWEVER after the 500 years it latched on. Chrona's operator was actually Sean. Sean ended up getting ahold of Michael and told her "haha doesnt this guy kinda look like us? thats strange!" WHICH SOUNDS KINDA FUNNY TO ME.. Chrona's s*n wake-up pattern was kind of annoying and chaotic? She's random and can think up solutions to problems shes in rather quickly - but when she cant, she panics. so usually, when it first "wakes up", he looks around and spouts many questions at the first person star sees, which is... usually Sean, which was stars operator! and it can be kind of aggressive too, and will resort to violence when he doesnt get answers in time. BUT she usually calms down as soon as things are explained to her. okay thats enough added stuff. ill retype the info in the drawing in case its hard to see <3 Gender is mostly made up of fluidity in xenogenders (gendersylph) * "pinwheel pieces" are glass containers. pinwheel function can still spin. * Not their biological child (thatd be weird) but gained attachment over time and developed a family-like relationship. * stickers are a gift from Sean + bow is from both of them. Charms and beads are from Michael, which he usually found on the buildings floor(s) - and figured Chrona would like a trinket. * Chrona is a trinket collector! Well, she just takes stuff that she sees is left behind. * Clock handles and gear spin/function like a normal clock. * Glass is thick and more frosted towards the center.

[jimmy-johns-was-taken]

HI!!! could you do Tim wright but he’s a father figure to a scene/emo teen - headcanons 😎

like he’s not biologically their dad but he’s like a dad to them 🕺

it’s like this exhausted man who is a heavy smoker and never sleeps and is very depressed and then this scene/emo teenager that absolutely looks up to him and thinks he’s so cool lol.

Stop this is too cute! I love dad Tim

Dad Tim with a Scene daughter

Imagine

Grumpy old man with a very lively daughter

Almost like black cat and golden retriever

But not in a couple way

You play really really loud music and are super expressive

He couldn’t care less for anything and very rarely smiles

You remember the first time you made him smile though

You had told some dumb joke about a new band you started listening to, something about a black veil? Tim had no clue

But he found it funny

And he smiled

And you smiled back, face lighting up in pure happiness

Best day ever

You get him really cheesy mugs (#1 dad) and he gets you new belts, hair stuff (dye, conditioner, literally whatever you need), and all sorts of other stuff

If you’re a killer, you’re probably good friends with Nina

And by that, then also Toby, Clockwork, EJ, and others you know and are on decent terms with

Id imagine you’re really cool with Nina

I think a Tim daughter (but whose like grunge and cold and stuff) x Nina would be so cute

But that’s not this post

LATER DATE

Tim’s always nervous about you killing

He always makes sure you have something with you, like firstaid, all sorts of weapons, pepper spray!

But it’s ok, cuz he gets you band stickers, other stickers (like hello Kitty, invader zim, etc) to make them look cute

So while you might be covered in blood, you look cute

And Brian loves it

Brian thinks y’all have a great relationship

And so even if Tim isn’t the best dad

He tries, and even though y’all fight sometimes and you scream at each other

He loves you, he really does

He tries his best to be a good dad, but he never thought he’d actually be one

You might not understand everything he does for you, or why he may ground you, or why he won’t let you go out with Nina and them one night

But it’s really because he cares and just wants you to be safe

He’s not perfect, but he tries to be the best dad ever

Also, a core childhood memory is you in the back seat, heavy metal playing on the radio, and him making you tell him the name of the song and the band

[bambi-slxt]

Would you be open to writing Chris/Matt X Nonbinary Reader headcanon?

of course, my love, thank you for the req 🤍

enby!reader:

✨a concept✨

includes usage of pet names that are gender-neutral in my opinion

coming out -

chris: "you guys have the best flag colors, honestly. don't tell nick i said that, he'll kill me."

matt: "they/them? cool, mine are he/him, wanna go get ice cream?"

pride parade -

chris: "all of these pins are gonna look so cool on my backpack, holy shit, these go so hard."

pride parade with matt: "i told you to put on more sunscreen, that's probably why you're burning. no pride stickers until you put it on."

meeting the parents -

chris: "as long as you let him talk about golf, Jimmy's gonna love you. don't be nervous, i got you." very wet forehead kiss

matt: "okay so there's something you have to know about Mary Lou, right..."-deep sigh-"she's gonna make you a casserole. yeah. yeah like- yeah like a whole, a Whole Ass Casserole to take home. and she'll call me. and ask if you liked it. you're not allergic to anything right?"

hanging out with justin and the boys -

chris: "he may seriously rock your shit at cards so if you wanna play with me you can. no, i'm not bad at cards. i'm not cheating! what is this slander against me?" chris is very bad at cards and is trying very hard to cheat his way to victory.

matt: "you've never played Super Smash Bros? nah, i'll teach you. don't want you to worry about learning it tomorrow instead of having fun with everybody, come here. okay so first you pick your character...yeah it kinda matters but i'll start you off with Kirby, he's pretty easy...yes you can be the purple one."-kisses your cheek-"you're so adorable."

self-expression:

chris: "how other people feel about how you express yourself literally doesn't matter. they can go sit bare-assed on a lego. i think you look cool as shit and my opinion is the only good one, so." he's very proud of himself, but he does genuinely care about you and how you feel. if he could get rid of your doubts about how you style yourself, he would.

matt: "listen, my entire goal when i get dressed in the morning is to look homeless. i promise you, the people who matter won't give a flying fuck."

spicy time -

chris: "biologically, you've got one of the two set-ups, and i'm experienced in both,"-wiggling eyebrows-"so you're in good hands."

matt: "you experiment however you want, sweetheart. i'm here to learn how you like it."

aftercare -

chris: "blankets for you, water...you want juice? sure baby, i'll get you juice," he chuckles, kissing your cheek before heading to the kitchen, leaving you snug under his fluffiest blanket.

matt: "come on, shower time. nope, let's go. i know it's warm but we gotta...okay, you get five more minutes, and then shower."

dear anon,

hope you liked this! i'm not nonbinary myself, though a dear friend is, and in this post, i've used pet names and honorifics that i know for a fact they're comfortable with, and i hope none of these were off-putting to you.

thank you!

- bambi <3

[ashedink]

A Vulture In Therapy

It’s Never Been About Death (But It Is All I Think About)

-

The hospital was like a labyrinth. I remember having an anxiety attack the first time I went to inpatient therapy here, and the nurses who were talking to me were absolutely useless. They sent me to the wrong floor and were really pushy and suffocating even as I was starting to twitch and cry and hyperventilate.

Now I wore the same sticker tag every day and knew the route. Why did it require two different elevators to get to this floor? I have no clue. I didn’t build it.

My therapist and psychiatrist both wanted me to attend inpatient therapy, saying that it might help me develop some healthier coping strategies, and determine if further treatment would be worth pursuing. I think they were worried about how my suggestion for treatment overlapped with my obsession with death. People get concerned when I talk about how often I think about death. I have to reassure people over and over again that I don’t want to die. It’s a macabre and spiritual fascination. The historical, chemical, spiritual, emotional, and biological process fascinate me. Everything dies. It's one thing all of us animals of planet earth truly have in common.

And death feeds life. That has been the case almost since life has been.

Today was my next to last day. It helped to see other people who were struggling like me, especially when we helped each other with wisdom for our own lives. I made some friends I would never see again. I shared some good moments and some uncomfortable ones. Today was going to show them this other side of me, though.

Today we also ended up, intentionally or otherwise, with death as the main topic of discussion.

When you live in the south it’s hard to find anything that is secular. Even things explicitly said to be secular make sure that there is all the space for religious talk that people could possibly want. I mean I suppose it’s fair, we were talking about death and many people process death through religion.

Still, people kept trying to include me specifically in their religious talk, so when it was my time to speak…

Well…

“I’m not a religious person.”

Several people’s faces got awkward as they realized they had been trying to rope what they assumed was the only atheist in the zipcode into their church talk.

“I am spiritual though. I think about death a lot. I never learned how to mourn correctly. My family tried to hide death from me. I was never allowed to feel or express negative emotions, so even when someone died, I didn’t know how to cry anymore. I would just go numb. Besides, other people around me needed me, and I have a chronic need to be there for other people when they need me. I am a person who can reschedule grief. A month or two months or three would pass and then suddenly that grief would come knocking. My grandmother passed last year. It took me two months of time and three solid days alone to break down and cry.”

I tastefully edited out that the bourbon helped too, because two of the people there were recovering alcoholics.

“To me, the vulture is a sacred animal.”

I held up the painting I’d worked on during art therapy. It was of a swarm of black birds ascending into the sky. I know it looked grim and ominous to other people, but as I talked I could see them begin to understand.

“It doesn’t waste. I love scavengers in general. Creatures that take up the unwanted or lost. I see vultures and I see the grim cleaners of the world. Many people don’t see the value of the scavenger, but we’re far better off with them in it than without. Did you know that in areas with low vulture populations, rabies is more common? This is because without flocks of vultures to break down carcasses quickly, they are instead visited by feral dogs, coyotes, foxes, racoons, and many other mostly mammalian opportunist. This makes carcasses a disease vector. Parasites and disease can spread from conflicts over a carcass,” I realized I was beginning to overshare one of my hyperfixations. Time to wrap it up. “They rarely kill. They consume the rotten and undesirable. They prevent disease. I love seeing them because to me they are not just symbols of death, they’re life. There is no real death here, only the cycle of life reusing its building blocks to make more life. I don’t want to be embalmed when I die. I want to be put in the earth to rot, that way the molecules that make up my body can be where they belong. Everywhere. Death as a continuation of life. Everything that consumes me, I will be.”

I was used to creeping people out. The room was quiet for a bit, digesting the condensed documentary I had just unloaded on them, punctuated with my funeral plans.

What do you see when you look at me? I don’t look like a monster, not until you interact with me. My way of talking has never been quite human. I am physically the human animal. I don’t like that many humans don’t see themselves as animals. We are. We’ve tricked ourselves into thinking we aren’t, that we are something separated from the animals and plants and dirt, and that’s not healthy.

So I refuse to act. It unsettles people.

I am an animal of the dirt and sky and rain.

I just happen to wear human skin.

The conversation moved on.

The day’s session came to a close.

There was a new respect for vultures in that room. I walked away feeling lighter in mind and body. I stood on the 3rd floor of the parking garage and looked out over the streets.

I opened discord on my phone and scrolled back through a conversation with a friend.

-

tigergirltail - 06/06/2024 9:50 AM

Maybe wanting to be a therian is a symptom of being a therian. It didn't occur to me until last night that wanting to have the dreams was a sign.

ashedink 06/06/2024 9:51 AM

That’s a good point.

Kinda like how some people figure out they’re trans, not because of a presence of gender dysphoria, but by the absence of gender euphoria.

tigergirltail - 06/06/2024 9:55 AM

Wanting it is that first symptom.

Yeah, literally how I awakened.

-

We’ve been friends for so long, and we’re still finding new bridges to cross together.

Maybe I will follow you over this one too, if my therapist is satisfied with how inpatient therapy went.

Is it arrogant to try to become that which I hold in such high spiritual regard? Maybe that’s just human greed want it. There is no dysphoria here, I simply exist as I am regardless of my vessel.

But maybe I should try it. Maybe euphoria is waiting for me in an unexpected shape.

I mean, I’ll be an animal either way.

Maybe I'll be a happy animal.

[fox-barnes]

FC: Maitreyi Ramakrishnan

"𝓨𝓐𝓨!"

⭑𓂃 MARVEL UNIVERSE OC

INFORMATION

FULL NAME:

Fox Romanoff-Barnes

AGE:

18

GENDER:

Nonbinary

PRONOUNS:

they/them

pronouns page

SEXUALITY:

bisexual

biromantic

ETHNICITY:

Desi American

DATE OF BIRTH:

November 22

MENTAL/PHYSICAL DISABILITIES:

ADHD

depression

anxiety

PTSD

sleep apnea

IBS

scoliosis

ABILITIES:

illusions

conjuring items

magic blasts

casting spells/enchantments

more magical abilities

PARENTS:

@natt-romanoff-official

@official-buckybarnes

SIBLINGS:

@the-loss-of-my-life

@moon-barnes

@multifandomer537

@butter-n-popcorn

@lukyan-barnes

@zenya-medvdev

@thee-little-angel

GRANDPARENTS:

@ironwidowassassin

@its-not-crimson-dynamo

@all-agatha-harkness

AUNTS:

@your-fav-russian-assassin

PETS:

@official-alpinebarnes0

Jackie

@jimmy-the-fox

FRIENDS:

@moongirlwidow

@nevaeh-daughterofvalcarol

@jollyjellyy

@you-know-me-no-you-dont

@loki-variant-number-24601

@hawkeyes-favorite

@calico-witch

@emmagical-bennett

@bird-girl-ali

@the-real-peterparker

@pyxis-deliveryservices

@wadewilsonposting

@tony-starkinator

@noyabrina-peony

@azrael-done

@merc-with-a-mouth-69

PARTNER:

@laufeykid-loki

CHILDREN:

@ireallyliketacosokay

OCCUPATION:

in Agatha’s Coven of Chaos

running for vice president

runs the Fox x Mischief Club

PERSONALITY:

silly

impulsive

cheerful (most of the time)

hopeless romantic

deeply caring of their loved ones

daring

chaotic

mischievous

brave

reckless- jumps headfirst into danger

HOBBIES:

reading

writing

singing

swimming

fighting

throwing parties

playing pranks

going on missions

LIKES:

foxes

royal blue

chocolate (especially dark chocolate)

their family

magic

adventure

kicking bad guys’ asses

crop tops

pretty dresses

parties

stickers

shopping

roses

Brooklyn 99 (show)

Ever After High (show)

hugs

pranks

LOKI

desserts, especially cake

DISLIKES:

discrimination

people who hurt the ones they love

narcissists

egoists

know-it-alls

bad guys

drinking water

FEARS:

loosing their loved ones

being alone

APPEARANCE

SKIN:

medium/chocolate brown

HAIR

black

royal blue streaks

shoulder length

curly

EYES:

dark brown

HEIGHT:

5’2

ACCESSORIES:

nose ring

HOUSE

BACKGROUND

Fox’s biological mother died in the battle of NY. Fox recently discovered that they are descended from Heimdall and are a demigod. They’ve never met their dad. Fox is still traumatized from the battle of NY. Fox wants to be like their hero, their (adopted) dad, and save the world someday.

OTHER

MOD: @foxherder

CREDIT FOR THE TEMPLATE: @moon-barnes

[strawberry-cowmilk]

the brothers as uncles

a/n: baby can be either biological or adopted it's not specified in this, it's mc's and any other random brother

mc's gender is not mentioned, not proof read

content warnings: children/babies

-----

Lucifer

he's a little worried, he never looked at any of his brothers and thought of them as father material, but as long as you're all happy it's fine

lucifer helps out with a lot of the preparation too, he'll even go to devildom ikea and ask the staff for 'the finest quality baby crib'

he will basically be your main babysitter too, the baby loves him and that makes him really happy but he will deny it (while smiling and looking away, very convincing)

Mammon

mammon might be a bit sad he won't be your co-parent but he makes peace with it, he'll be the world's best uncle instead

he even got a sticker for his car that says 'world's coolest uncle'

mammon is great with kids so of course the baby will love him, he'll play peekaboo and stuff with them and they're laughing really loudly and happily the whole time

when your child can talk he'll ask them 'who's your favorite uncle?' every 5 seconds

Leviathan

he's a little uninvolved since it's not his child and all, but the baby does interest him

you caught him explaining tsl lore to them, and they were listening closely and making little noises

'mc can I dress up the baby as azuki-tan when I'm cosplaying ruri-chan?'

when the baby is old enough he'll play video games with them, that's basically what he thinks babysitting is

Satan

as much as he (can admit he) loves his brothers, he thinks none of them, including himself, are fit to be fathers so he may need some time to process the news after hearing it

he'll buy you and his brother many parenting books, and he'll read them himself too

you can see the fear in his eyes when you ask him to hold the baby

but he really warms up to them, now he reads them bedtime stories

Asmodeus

he's happy, the minute he finds out he's going to be an uncle he's calling everybody and sharing the news

asmo will have a little gift prepared for the baby when they first come home (he may or may not have bought it already the same day he found out he'll be an uncle)

literally anything the baby does is adorable to him, he has like a bunch of cute pictures on his ddd too, which he'll always share with you and his brother

Beelzebub

he's in such a happy mood nothing could ruin his whole week, especially if belphie is the one who's going to be a father

beel is quick to worry too though, if the baby coughs once he's trying to call the doctor

he is always available to babysit, beel will clear anything that's on his scedule to free some time to spend with the newest addition to his family

also he's the cool uncle who always takes you to mcdonalds after school

Belphegor

at first he's like 'well I'm not going to be one of the parents so I won't have to do much work'

but after he sees the baby for the first time he knows he'll do anything to help make sure they're happy and safe, even if that means skipping a nap

also he takes nap with the baby, he'll literally lie down on the floor next to their crib

plus he lets them sleep on his favorite pillow

[jflemings]

I have a few hcs/questions about Piper:

Piper going to Jessie and not R for things (something small like doing her hair or asking her to help tie her shoes) and R being really happy that Piper is accepting of Jessie but also a little sad cos that’s her baby and she used to just come to R for those things

Piper going to camp with Jessie instead or R for whatever reason (maybe Jessie’s camp is in the UK/Europe for once so it’s shorter travel for Piper)

Piper making 2 Mother’s Day cards at school (one for R and one for Jess) and Jessie is just in absolute tears - like sobbing - and Piper is like what’s wrong??? And Jessie is just like I’m so happy and it’s a big family cuddle day/weekend

Jess and Piper catching on that R is feeling stressed/tired/ill etc and forces a cuddle day where R does absolutely nothing and is just looked after by her girls

1. i have gotten another ask about this so it’ll be a fic :)

2. canada are set to play england in a friendly in london so piper stays with jessie whilst you go with the matildas. the kit crew make a mini fleming jersey for piper and she loves it!! she walks around so proudly in it and with jessie and your permission, the media team do a video where piper interviews jessie.

it goes a bit viral and everyone is melting at the way piper and jessie interact with eachother because although she isn’t biologically jessie’s, they are eerily similar.

piper clings to sabs and cloe through camp and a lot of great candids come out of it.

piper follows bev around like she does jonas or tony and every so often bev just blindly hands her a snack or a drink whilst yelling at the girls on the pitch. piper is completely unfazed by this because of how tony is on the sidelines.

the first thing piper says to jordyn is that she reminds her of rapunzel because she’s got long blonde hair and she’s pretty. she then asks if she’s got a pet chameleon.

jordyn and her boyfriend dress up as rapunzel and flynn rider for halloween that year, it’s adorable

3. sam and kristie take piper the friday night before mother’s day weekend because you and jessie hadn’t had a date night in soooo long. sam lets her have dino nuggets for dinner and choc chip ice cream for desert as long as piper promises to get into bed at the right time.

they draw and colour and sam puts on alvin and the chipmunks because she’s never seen it ???

kristie then pulls out a plastic tub full of craft supplies and sam is like ??? where the fuck did that come from ????

“you had nothing here for her so i got her some crafts”

“when?????”

“like a month ago”

“where did you put the box”

kristie is in disbelief because the box is kept in the back of their closet underneath all of sam’s coats that are hanging up, there’s no way she hasn’t seen it

sam does one of those paint by number things and kristie suggests making you a mother’s day card and piper immediately is going through the different coloured paper and the fancy scissors and stickers that she can use

she hands a piece of pink paper and a piece of yellow paper to kristie to fold and kristie asks her if she’s gonna make you two cards

“no silly, one’s for mama and the other is for mummy”

piper decorates yours with butterflies and jessie’s with ladybugs

the next day the two of them go to the florist to get you both a little something whilst sam heads to the bakery to grab you a cupcake each (she offered to just make them but kristie knows she can’t cook, let alone bake to save her life so store bought was the best option)

sam drops piper back home with a smile on her face. you open the door puzzled but spot the gift bag with the flowers and know that something’s up

sam leaves and piper rushes into your bedroom where jessie is putting away clean laundry with a big smile on her face, carefully putting down the bag and getting out the flowers to hand to jessie

jessie just assumes the flowers are for you because the two of them had planned something for you for mother’s day but then piper stomps her foot

“open the card!!!!!”

you walk into the room just in time to see jessie open her card whilst piper gives you yours

she’s tearing up and piper quickly becomes concerned and is worried that she doesn’t like the card. jessie assures her that she loves it and that she loves the little ladybugs she drew on the front

the three of you spend the day together, going for a picnic like originally planned and cuddling in the big bed watching movies. jessie cooks your favourite meal and gives you a necklace that piper had helped pick out and a good travel mug since you’d been meaning to get another one for ages

you look at her sheepishly and pull out a book that she’s been wanting and a photo of the three of you in a nice frame. it’s from piper’s fourth birthday party when she was blowing out the candles. you and jessie are sat beside her and there’s a clear shot of macca, alanna and caitlin in the background stuffing their faces with party pies

jessie tucks piper in that night and then comes back out into the living room balling her eyes out because she wasn’t expecting any of today. it wasn’t her first mother’s day with you and piper but she still had plans to make it all about you, so for piper to make her a card and think about her made her really emotional

you two spend the night cuddling until it’s time to go to bed and it’s the best nights sleep jessie’s had in a long time

4. jessie catches on that you’re ill as soon as you wake up. you’re groggy and don’t seem to be all with it as you trudge around the bedroom looking for your slippers that are sat by the door like they always are

she just watches you though to make sure she’s not overthinking it. you’d played a pretty rough game the night before and it had rained all week so maybe it was all just catching up to you

she knows she’s not overthinking it when piper climbs up onto her lap at the dining table

“what’s wrong with mummy?”

“you noticed that too, huh?”

“is she sick? she was coughing last night when she put me to bed”

that’s all jessie needs to hear before she’s dragging you back to bed and tucking you under the covers before literally throwing piper onto the bed next to you. piper giggles as she lands and ticks herself under the covers and snuggles up next to you just as jessie comes back with some medicine, a bottle of water and a cup of tea.

you protest because piper starts preschool regularly on the following monday and jessie can’t get sick either because she can’t miss training. neither of them are having a bar of it and force you to cuddle with them.

you fall asleep in less than half an hour after jessie turns on a documentary about safari animals. piper follows suit quickly and falls asleep snuggled in between the two of you. jessie isn’t a napper but she also falls asleep combing her fingers through your hair

[lover-also-fighter-also]

MEET MY MC

Hi y'all,

I have been waiting to create an MC profile for my HSS:CA MC, and finally I got the time to do it today. Hope you like it!

MILA DELGADO

Birthday: 15th April, 2002

Meaning of name: In Spanish, it means the miracle, or in Russian it means gracious and dear one.

Pronouns: She/Her (cis-woman)

Sexuality: Biromantic and Bisexual

Personality:

Dorky, clumsy, funny, and emotional. She is quick to anger and easy to please.

Has a very strong sense of justice, and can snap when the injustice is happening in front of her.

Does not hesitate to get into conflicts when the person being disturbed is a person she loves.

Family:

Biological Family: Alan Park (Father), Faith Park (Mother), Carlos (Twin Brother), Wendy Park (Paternal Aunt)

Adopted Family: Greg Delgado (Adopted Father), Rita Delgado (Adopted Mother).

Backstory (TW: mentions of Death) :

Mila was born in London, 3 1/2 minutes before her twin, Carlos. When she was 1, Faith and Alan meet with an accident where a drunk truck driver crashes into their car, leading to their death on-spot. She and Carlos were put in foster care system after nobody in their family was able to take them in, and they were adopted 2 years later by Greg and Rita Delgado in Cedar Cove.

Ethnicity: She is half-Asian and half-white from her biological family, and her adoptive family are Spanish.

Hobbies:

Other than play acting, improv and method acting, she is a really good singer and can pick up any kind of tune.

Baking is her comfort activity and additionally she loves to help out at the Golden Griddle.

She has a favorite activity with each person she hangs out with: With Carlos its basketball, Skye its drawing, Rory its video games and with Ajay its watching movies.

Love life:

As a kid, she hung out with Rory a lot since he was the only other kid in the neighborhood who was her age. For a while, she crushed on him till 5th grade, but grew out of the crush after middle school and admired him more as a good friend.

Her feelings for Skye grew, and they become official after the winter term of their freshman year. They end up going to different colleges in New York, with Mila majoring in Acting and Skye in Tech.

As per my HC, Mila proposes marriage to Skye at the end of their senior year of college, but they don't get married until two years later.

Other Facts:

Mila starts exploring Gothic fashion and music after she starts hanging out with Skye.

She has a deathly fear of rodents and rodent-like creatures, that sometimes Carlos takes advantage of.

The first play she acted in was 'The Hare and the Tortoise' in kindergarten.

She had a space obsession as a kid, and insisted her parents that her room walls be painted black. Eventually she had to settle with glow in the dark stickers on the ceiling.

Tagging: @cadybear420 @choicesficwriterscreations @somerandomjewelleryonthefloor for this MC profile.

[dailyanarchistposts]

The Basic Differences

Let’s face it: There is a major dispute in the ecology and Green movements, today. It is a dispute between social ecology and “deep ecology” — the first, a body of ideas that asks that we deal with human beings primarily as social beings who differ profoundly as to their status as poor and rich, women and men, black and white, gays and “straights,” oppressed and oppressor; the second, that sees human beings as a mere “species” — as mammals and, to some people like the “Earth First!” leaders, as “vicious” creatures — who are subject almost entirely to the “forces of nature” and are essentially interchangeable with lemmings, grizzly bears (a favorite species!), or, for that matter, with insects, bacteria, and viruses.

These are not airy, vaguely philosophical, and remote problems to be disputed by modern-day scholastics. They underpin very practical differences. The social view of humanity, namely that of social ecology, focuses primarily on the historic emergence of hierarchy and the need to eliminate hierarchical relationships. It emphasizes the just demands of the oppressed in a society that wantonly exploits human beings, and it calls for their freedom. It explores the possibility or a new technology and a new sensibility, including more organic forms of reason, that will harmonize our relationship with nature instead of opposing society to the natural world. It demands sweeping institutional changes that will abolish a competitive “grow-or-die” market society — frankly, called capitalism, not such politically safe and socially neutral words like an “industrial,” “technological,” or “post-industrial” society — and replace it with an ecologically oriented society based on free, confederated, humanly scaled communities in which people will have direct, face-to-face control over their personal and social lives.

By contrast, “deep ecology” essentially overlooks the profound social differences that divide human from human and “zoologizes” poor and rich, women and men, black and white, gays and “straights,” oppressed and oppressor into a biological lump called “humanity” which is, presumably, “spiritually impoverished,” “anthropocentric” or “human- oriented” in “its” belief that the world was “made” (by whom? — a mean God?) exclusively for human enjoyment, and humanistic ends (whatever that word means these days). As voiced by Bill Devall and George Sessions in their bible, Deep Ecology, this shift from a basically social to a basically spiritual outlook essentially side-steps the social (apart from a “minority tradition” that recycles the far-reaching works of Peter Kropotkin, the Russian anarchist, into a few bumper-sticker slogans) and then takes a complete nose-dive into Buddhism, Taoism, “the Christian tradition,” the “question of technology,” “green politics” — and, very significantly, Malthusianism.

The crucial economic forces that divide so much of humanity into exploited and exploiter are replaced by conflicting “worldviews.” Utterly opposed individuals like the authoritarian Communist, Woody Guthrie, are amalgamated with libertarian anarchists like Paul Goodman. The “development of a market economy” and the “impact of the rise of capitalism” are given short shrift. They are mentioned once, only in passing (p. 45), as issues that attract “some historians and social scientists to explain the origins and development of the dominant worldview.” “Our purpose here is not to extensively review the origin and development of the dominant worldview,” write Deep Ecology‘s authors, Devall and Sessions, in what can be regarded as one of the major understatements of the book, “but to explore in general its (the worldview’s) influence on current societies and on our approach to ultimate reality (metaphysics), to knowledge (epistemology), to being (ontology), to the cosmos (cosmology) and to social organization.” (p. 45)

As it turns out, the expectant reader gets a heavy tribute to Thomas Malthus (pp. 45–46) for an analysis of current social problems (i.e., the “population problem”), the impact of a “technological society” as a source of personal alienation (p. 48), “basic intuitions and experiencing ourselves and Nature” as the “foundations of deep ecology” (p. 65), and a “realization of the ‘self-in-Self,’ where ‘Self’ stands for organic wholeness” as doses of metaphysics and epistemology combined. The notion that “All things in the biosphere have an equal right to live and blossom and to reach their own individual forms within the larger Self-realization” (p.67) is a sparkling issue that generated a serious discussion in the New Scientist on the right of “endangered viruses” like the smallpox virus to exist and flourish. All of this is presented in a metaphoric form that evokes a sense of nausea in any thinking reader. The few social issues with which Deep Ecology began fade into paens to wilderness, critiques of natural resource conservation, and the brilliant rediscovery that organic agriculture is good and city life is bad. Besides a host of platitudes, what we need in addition to communing with nature and dissolving our burdensome “selves” into a cosmic organic wholeness, Devall and Sessions emphasize, is to turn our “opponent into a believer” (p. 200). In short, we need the personal touch: a festival of warmth, rituals, and a good dose of religion that tries to pass for politics.

That a market economy based on dog-eat-dog as a law of survival and “progress” has penetrated every aspect of society has no centrality whatever in this self-indulgent literary collage of platitudes and pieties. At a time when the “self” is being rapidly dissolved by the mass media, we are urged to further this process by dissolving all the boundaries that define us — this, in the name of a cosmic “Self” that seems more Supernatural than natural.