#big meaty men bumping meat [ big e ]

[freshlyjudgedfiend]

tag dump part 1!

[reginaldqueribundus]

TRANSCRIPT

Rashad Dunn: fbrooks324 asks: past, present or future, who is your dream match as individuals and as a team? Big E: This is an answer that I've answered many times, but my dream match— [Xavier Woods & Kofi Kingston start giggling] Why y'all snickering? How dare y'all snicker? I'm talking 'bout a, a match? That means a lot to me? [trying not to laugh] And y'all wanna sit here and make jokes? And laugh and giggle like schoolgirls? Tee-heein'? Xavier Woods: [laughing] Tee-heein'? Tee-heein'? Big E: That's what y'all were doin'. You were tee-heein'. Y'all already know the answer. If I were to ever have a dream match, it would be against the one, the only! GOLDBERRRRRRG!! [more laughter] Big E: That's right! Goldberg! I don't wanna— I don't wanna hear y'all talkin' 'bout all his work rate! And how guy's on the reg(?). And moon salt! I don't care about any a that. Ya heard? [he starts laughing again] Y'all wanna great match, nah. Bump that. [they all laugh uncontrollably] Big E: I wanna see… two big men, with big [he tries to say “titties” but is laughing too hard] With big chests! [they all laugh so hard they can't sit upright] Big E: And big muscles! Bumpin' meat! Woods: Bumpin' meat?? [everyone is speechless with laughter, nearly falling out of their chairs; Big E has tears in his eyes] Big E: That's why I'm here! That's why I watched wrestling as a kid! You want your five star matches, you want your 30 minute classics, not meeheeheeheehee [uncontrollable laughter continues] Big E: Big meaty men slappin' meat!! [laughing so hard he can barely speak] That's what I want to see! [laughter continues] I'm crampin' up. Woo-hoo-hoo! Hoo!

[retro-rezz-the-est]

Wifeeyyyyy!!! Rant ahead

But why do I feel like we really have to wait for THE match if the year between Roman and Drew until September when they face off for the UK POV?!?!?

I WANT IT NOW!!! (And not these stupid matches until then!! 😭)

they're trying to distract us with roman vs bork part 345677645 to distract us from how banger the clash at the castle match is gonna be lmao i can feel it within my negro spiritual bones XD

[bastardpacs]

LEGIT I WANT HOBBS BRODY KING AND LANCE IN THA LADDER MATCH BECAUSE B E E F ON LADDERS = RATINGS 🕺✨ (pac and andrade honorary because they ain’t the beefiest but they fulfil the tiddie requirement)

AMY YOU SAID IT AND NOW ITS ALL I WANT!!!! BIG MEATY MEN BUMPING MEAT ON THE LADDERS

ITS ALL I WANT NOW AMY 😩

[joelletwo]

[VD: clip of four guys around a table in an interview, the wrestler Big E being asked a question interviewer rashad dunn: [username] asked, past, present, or future, who is your dream match as individuals and as a team? big e: this is an answer that i've answered many times. but my dream match--

one of the other guys (kofi kingston) starts laughing silently. when big e turns to look at him, the other guy (xavier woods) starts laughing as well. both guys laugh increasingly uncontrollably through the video.

big e: why y'all snickering? how dare y'all snicker? [stuttering through his own laughter] i'm talking about a match that means a lot to me, and y'all wanna sit here and make jokes? and laugh and giggle like schoolgirls? teehee-ing? xavier, both guys doubling over laughing: teehee-ing, he said teehee-ing!

big e: that's what y'all were doing. you were teehee-ing. [getting serious again] y'all already know the answer. if i were to ever have a dream match, it would be against the one, the only, goldberrrrg! that's right, goldberg. i don't want to - i don't want to hear y'all talk about all this "work rate" and how good guys are in the ring and moonsaults. i don't care about any of that. you heard? [he starts laughing with the other guys again and starts struggling to get his words out straight, taking big pauses] y'all want a great match? nah. bump that. i wanna see two big men with big-- [stops to laugh] with big chests-- [stops again, killing the other guys] and big muscles, bumping meat. [this gets even the interviewer to lose it] xavier: bumping meat! stop! stop!

big e: that's why i'm here. that's why i watched wrestling as a kid. you want your five-star matches? you want your 30-minute classics? not me. [collapses in laughter, then regains himself] big meaty men slappin meat! [wheezing out] that's what i want to see. i'm cramping up. [he takes big bracing breaths as everyone loses it]

end description]

two years later and BIG MEATY MEN SLAPPIN MEAT is still the funniest thing that’s ever happened