#big jack horner fanfic | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

proxylynn · 2 years ago

Text

MY WISH WAS ALWAYS YOURS (part #1)

Summary: [Nursery rhymes are rarely given a fair chance in a world of magic and fairy tales. Often mocked and considered jokes. Little do most know of the hardships they endure. What they have to do to overcome their namesake. Most embrace it. Others fade away into obscurity. But few are able to break this mold they were placed in. They become something more than what their rhyme would allow. Sometimes for the better yet often worse. Jack Horner was one such mold-breaker. Overpowering his nursery rhyme to become something so much larger than a simple pie boy. Now he runs not only a substantially profitable pie company but is also a feared crime lord and collector of all things magic. Not bad for a buttered baker's boy. Yet he's not alone. Under his employ is another nursery rhyme character. One that owes him her life. You won't find her name in any book, and she prefers it that way. None know where she comes from or why she is so close to someone such as Jack. He knows her past and that's enough. It is this reason that she serves him. And nothing can break the chains that bind her to him. This is the story of an unlikely and very unhealthy friendship. The tale of a greedy man and a woman that seeks his happiness.]

Do you know the difference between a nursery rhyme and a fairy tale?

Nursery rhymes are different from fairy tales for several reasons.

Nursery rhymes are usually poems, while fairy tales are narratives.

Nursery rhymes are usually meant to be sung, while fairy tales are spoken.

Nursery rhymes are usually kept short with little context, while fairy tales are long and full of details.

Nursery rhymes usually have a musical component, while fairy tales are more visually stimulating.

But there's also one big key difference between the two...Nursery rhymes rarely end well.

------

Nestled in the heart of a Spanish industrial city, using its lake as a moat, and standing out as the tall centerpiece of it all is the Horner Pie Company. Currently, the Jack Horner Pie Co. is run by the man himself. This somewhat isolated enterprise where most employees even live on-site may smell sickly sweet from all the baked goods it produces, but don't let the alluring scent of pie deceive you. This compound is a base of operations for the owner's eccentric obsession with magic. He's hired various soldiers, assassins, and his own bakers to scout the lands to collect as many magical items as possible. Despite this, it is still a well-run business, even if conditions are a tad disheartening.

Imposing towering walls, giant dark wooden doors emblemed with golden J.H.s, barbed wire, red-tinted light fixtures, and rather warm stained glass windows are just some of the sights you can take in while entering its base. There's far more that awaits deep within the facility's main area and even the below. However, the seat of power is not all that distant from where the goods are made. It's easier to manage the bakers if one doesn't have to roam very far away from them. It is here that he sits at his large desk, "Big" Jack Horner, with quill in hand and going over numerous parchments that are slowly but surely making his right eye twitch with ever-building frustration. Something isn't adding up right.

"Big" Jack Horner is a very large sizable man, both height and girth, boarding on being eight feet tall. Rotund in both body and the cheeks of his face which are far bigger than the rest of the face. His short pink hair hasn't changed once from the childish bob cut of his youth and his piercing blue eyes have been known to cast the iciest of gazes. He wears a long ripe plum-colored overcoat over a mountain’s majesty colored dress vest detailed by little upturned pies, under that is a white buttoned dress shirt with a double triangular cut, pomp and power colored cravat ties around his neck, wine-colored textured leather pants, and black knee high buttoned leather boots with small heels complete his flawless attire that somehow resists all logic by not exploding from his bulk. His legs are much a contrast to the rest of him, being average-sized, if not smaller than the rest of his body. His right hand's thumb is stained a lovely shade of plum, an effect from all the pies he has and continues to stick it into.

While one would think based on his looks that he's a jolly giant, nothing would be further from the truth. This is a man you want to handle with care lest you live to regret it or live at all if you're lucky. A cruel, sadistic, irredeemable megalomaniac with a rather comical nihilistic narcissism about him. This is a man who would see a burning house then toss in fireworks and roast marshmallows on the smoldering remains. This isn't to say he lacks people skills, because he's actually a surprisingly patient individual. Calm and collected like a saint at times. Always trying to interact with those around him even if he's about to do something horrible. Like a true businessman, he's witty, charming, persuasive, and above all a master manipulator who loves toying with others for his enjoyment before ending them. It's such skills that have allowed him to rise to power and amass respect in those he deems worth his employ. These same employees stay out of loyalty and fear of him. No one crosses Jack Horner. No one.

*knock-knock*

The faint sound breaks his concentration but isn't loud enough to irritate him.

“Enter.”

The doors open with a small groan from the wood as a woman pushes in a tea cart before shutting the doors behind her.

“Forgive the intrusion, Master Jack. But it's tea time.”

This was Lynsie aka "Little Lynn", his personal assistant and bodyguard. The woman was small compared to him, by at least two feet, and a little on the thick side but it worked with her full figure. Her most striking features are her long thigh-length brown hair and her deep chartreuse eyes that were highlighted by dark circles. She wears the standard musketeer guard uniform of a white buttoned undershirt, dark violet overshirt with matching trousers, a black vest with the crest of Jack Horner Pies emblazoned in fuchsia on the left breast held down by a dark gray belt, completed with black elbow length leather gloves and black knee high leather boots. Both of her ears are pierced twice with steel ball stud earrings. And around her neck, a silver choker band studded with a row of amethysts gems.

Jack groans, running a hand through his hair as he leans back in his throne-like chair.

“Five already? Where did the time go?”

She tilts her head in puzzlement as she approaches his desk with the cart.

“You sound troubled. Is something amiss?”

“Bah. Damn quarterly reports. They're always a pain.”

“But...?”

She could tell there was something more to this than troublesome paperwork and her inflection was his invitation to elaborate further as she beings to fix up an assortment of goods from the cart. He sighs and rubs the bridge of his nose, knowing while she won't pester him about it now she'll do so later on.

“But...Some numbers from one of our distribution shops aren't adding up. Their sale totals aren't matching the given amount of product sold.”

“Oh dear. That's definitely not good...”

She places a plate of tapas on his desk and starts making his tea.

“You don't think they're foolish enough to steal from you, do you?”

He wastes no time in feasting on the meaty appetizers before him. It's at least something else to focus on other than damn work. That and in the fixation on his work he had missed lunch entirely.

“Normally I would suspect something like that. But this is from one of our lucrative shops. Business is great in that area so it's not like they need to. Not unless they want to lose out on their money maker.”

“What area is it? Mind if I take a look?”

She offers him a cup of warm plum tea and he takes it with a knowing look.

“Sure, fine, whatever. You're only going to do it anyway.”

He sips from his cup as she smirks.

“Well, you're no fun.”

She strolls around to be at his side and leans down to read.

“Work isn't supposed to be fun.”

“It is when with you, Master Jack.”

He merely rolls his eyes at her. Not many were comfortable enough to speak with him so casually. Or rather, he didn't allow many to be so casual. He didn't need employees to be familiar with him on a personal level. Fearful respect is better than loving admiration in his eyes. She was the only exception to this but for reasons he'd never admit to. Thankfully for him, she didn't push this rare privilege too far as he imagined someone else would.

“I think I know that area.”

His brow cocked at her.

“Oh?”

She double-checks just to be sure.

“Yeah. It's a small spot, but it's not far from a docking port. Sailors like to hit local places and splurge after being out at sea for ages. Very good coin to be made, that's for sure.”

She straightens up and puts her hands behind her back.

“If you want, I can check what the issue is personally. I'm sure I can find the cause of this discrepancy.”

Her soft, gentle voice dipped slightly into bitterness with that last word, making him smirk.

“Now, Lynsie, the last time I let you go off on your own it resulted in a less than discrete bloodbath.”

“To be fair, in my defense... They deserved it.”

To that, Jack gave a much-needed laugh.

In stark contrast to her boss, Lynsie is someone most wouldn't think chose to be willingly around Jack. She exudes a calming and pleasant positive energy that can make a room full of roughhousing rouges disband with ease. Incredibly clever, civilized, and witty with a playful spunkiness. At heart, she's someone who'll bump into an inanimate object and then proceed to apologize to it because she doesn't want to seem rude. Such a woman at first glance appears to be everything a man like Jack Horner isn't. Kind, sympathetic, and empathetic. But to be frank, she is only like that to one person, Jack himself. Everyone else is merely tolerated for the sake of politeness. There is another side to her. A reason why Jack had made her his personal guard. A loyalty with no means of severing, unquestionable obedience, and a need to please that was scarred into her very core as a child. These are the traits that made a once gentle girl into a remorseless woman. Using her natural sweetness to persuade and disarm others into vulnerability before striking with deadly precision. If she targets you for any reason, it's too late to beg.

As Jack's mirth settles she leaves his side to return to the cart and tops off his tea.

“Ah...I needed that.”

“Always a pleasure to make you smile, Master Jack.”

And for her it honestly was. While it wasn't rare, Jack didn't smile often, and it filled her with pride whenever she was able to bring one to his face.

“Awe, well aren't you sweet. ...You're still not going.”

“Oh come on!”

Such a childish outburst is countered with a look of indifference and a rather hash flick to her forehead that makes her yelp.

“Do not raise your tone to me.”

His voice is stern with just a hint of warning. She rubs her sore brow and nods meekly.

“Yes, Master Jack. My apologies.”

He sits up straight and takes a slow sip of tea.

“As I was saying...You're not going. At least, not alone.”

She perks up at this as he continues.

“I do agree with what you said. This discrepancy needs to be handled with a personal touch. So take at least a few others with you and go.”

Her head tilts.

“Go? As in right this moment?”

His answer is just a look that speaks for him in a way that says “Did I stutter?”. She bows her head.

“Yes, of course. This will be taken care of post haste.”

She turns on her heel and starts to leave.

“And Lynsie...”

She pauses.

“See to it that this 'discrepancy' never happens again. Is that understood?”

A small smile comes to her.

“As you wish, Master Jack.”

She exits his office and he resumes taking in this moment of reprieve before getting back to work.

“*clears throat*”

She comes back in a minor sprint and grabs the cart.

“My bad!”

She shuffles out embarrassed which makes him chuckle. As he drinks his tea, he wonders if letting her out of his sight is a good move. Not that he had to worry about her fleeing or failing, no. If any of his subordinates can get a job done, it's her. The thing that concerned him was if she took things too far. Granted she only went ballistic one time, but still. The last thing he wants is more paperwork.

“Mr. Horner!”

A guardsman rushes into his office. Not a smart move. Jack doesn't like when people bust in like that.

“There better be a good reason you're barging in here.”

The look in his eyes is one of a snake ready to strike for this sudden intrusion. The guardsman gulps.

“Sir, yes sir. Little Lynn has been spotted rushing to stables and saddling up one of the unicorns.”

Jack sighs deeply and palms his face, dragging it slowly down with a groan. Of course, she'd take a unicorn. Those steeds are powerhouses. She going to ride into the night without sleeping. Typical.

“That woman, I swear...”

There's a small moment of silence. The guardsman is unsure what to do and Jack feels his eye twitch before his hand slaps down on his desk with a mighty intimidating 'WHACK'.

“Well? What are you waiting for?! Follow her!”

The guardsman stumbles a bit in fright from the shout but quickly turns tail and flees.

“Idiots. I'm surrounded by idiots. Oh...And they left the door open too? That's just fantastic!”

[Time Skip]

It's been two days now. No word had reached "Big" Jack Horner. But was he worried? Not at all. There's never a need to get reports by message when he could watch the events unfold before him in real-time and all in the palms of his hands.

The Trophy Room is where Jack keeps his more prized mystical artifacts, enchanted objects, magical icons, bobbles, geegaws, and trinkets. It's also where he keeps his research on the fabled Wishing Star, but that's neither here nor there. Cinderella's Glass Slipper? He's got it. The Beast's Enchanted Flower? He's got that too. Snow White's poison apples? He has them by the bushel. The mythical Sword in the Stone, Excalibur? You best believe he has it. Yet none of that was what he was engrossed in.

In his imposing seat, he holds the crystal ball of the Wicked Witch of the West, a massive orb to anyone else but to Jack, it was like holding a simple child's toy. This particular object granted him the ability to see that which he knew of and his desires. Granted, a useful tool, but it was specifically limited otherwise he wouldn't need to pay thieves to find items for him.

With a mere thought, the crystal ball heeds his whims, and the storm of magical energy inside swirls to open in the center, revealing Lynsie with the other guardsman as they approach a room somewhere.

————————————————–

She pulls a key out from her glove and turns to her associate.

“Keep watch out front. I won't be long.”

The man looks at her funny.

“Are you sure you don't need...?”

She shoots him a look dead in his eyes as if to say “Leave. Now.”. He flinches and steps back slowly.

“I...I'm going to go keep watch out front.”

She watches him leave, pausing before unlocking the door and then entering the dark room. Inside, she relocks the door and lights a candle left in the seemingly empty room, highlighting a man bound to a chair with a sack over his head. He doesn't appear to be moving. She gives a huff through her nose before snapping her fingers. This gets the man's attention.

“H-Hello? Who's there?”

He's nervous, as he should be.

“If this is about my tab, I swear I'm good for it.”

“Is that so?”

Her voice confuses him.

“Y-You're not from the bar, are you?”

“Afraid not. A shame really.”

She approaches the man.

“Why's that?”

“Because whoever you owe coin to would've been far kinder than I.”

She grabs the sack and yanks it off the man's head.

“Hello there, Simple Simon.”

It's clear he doesn't know who she is, but the moment he sees the crest on her uniform his eyes widen.

“Oh...Oh no...”

She smirks.

“I see you understand the situation. Good. Saves me the trouble.”

He starts to sweat a bit.

“L-Look...I...I'm sure we can come to an understanding.”

She tosses the sack to the side.

“Simple Simon met a pieman, Going to the fair; Says Simple Simon to the pieman, Let me taste your ware...”

She begins to circle the man while reciting his nursery rhyme.

“Said the pieman unto Simon, Show me first your penny; Says Simple Simon to the pieman, Indeed I have not any...”

“You don't have to do this.”

Her response is to slap him hard across the back of the head.

“Simple Simon went a-fishing, For to catch a whale; All the water he had got, Was in his mother's pail...”

He grumbles and stares down at the floor.

“Simple Simon went to look; If plums grew on a thistle; He pricked his fingers very much, Which made poor Simon whistle...”

She stops in front of him.

“He went for water in a sieve. But soon it all fell through. And now poor Simple Simon; Bids you all adieu!”

His eyes are still downcast and she doesn't like it.

“I know you're simple, Simon. But to be this stupid? To be pilfering pies from "Big" Jack Horner? Don't you know? No one steals from "Big" Jack Horner.”

“Don't you talk down to me!”

He snaps, glaring up at her, though she is unfazed.

“You have no idea what it's like being me. Being a nursery rhyme known for being a moron. I was just a dumb kid! What kid isn't dumb?!”

He grinds his teeth.

“No one wants to hire a simpleton. I have to scrape by on pity scraps just to live. A rich scumbag like Jack Horner doesn-ack!!”

His words are caught in his throat...which is currently in her grip.

“You shall not speak ill of that man.”

Her voice is as cold as ice. This did little to sway Simon's ire, as he then spits in her face. He probably expected her to release him and he could try to mess with his binds while she'd distracted by being grossed out. But to his dismay, she doesn't move. In fact, her grip only tightens and her eyes intensify with malice.

“Big mistake.”

He has only a moment to gulp in terror before she begins to pummel the ever-loving snot out of him. Gloved knuckles meet his face repeatedly. His pleas fall on deaf ears. She is not going to listen. She will stop only when satisfied with doling out this punishment to such a disrespectful soul. After a good couple of minutes, she relents, wiping the spit and blood from her face on her upper arm sleeves. His bound and busted body lies broken on the floor.

“You truly are simple. Do you think your nursery rhyme traps you? You couldn't be more wrong. Your nursery rhyme doesn't hold you back, Simon. You do. You chose to stay in its shadow. To let it control you. You are the reason for how your life is.”

She retrieves from her vest's inner pocket a small pouch.

“Nursery rhymes get dealt a bad hand compared to fairy tales. You admit to knowing this. So to knowingly steal from a fellow nursery rhyme, well...That's just asking for a bad ending.”

She kneels and grabs his face.

“You can insult him all you want, but you're just mad because he is everything you wish you were. He overcame his nursery rhyme. He made something more of himself. Something you'll never do.”

She forces his mouth open and crams the pouch in his gob, expelling the contents before making him swallow. He sputters and somewhat chokes as a strange powder fills his insides.

“*coughs* W-Wha...What was that? What did you give me?”

She merely lets go of him.

“Jack Horner is a man. A real man. But you? You are nothing.”

His body begins to tremble. He can feel things from within begin to change. She puts her hands behind her back and watches him as he panics.

“What's happening to me?! What did you do?!”

Her expression is as dead as a gravestone.

“You are nothing, Simon. Nothing but an insignificant bug.”

His body suddenly implodes, bursting into a puff of glittery dust. When the dust clears, where once there was Simple Simon now is only a small bug. Using the pouch, she scoops the bug up and ties it shut.

“I should kill you, Simon. Do you know what you've done with your stupidity? Not only have you stolen from my boss, making him very upset. Not only have you insulted the only friend I have, making me very upset. Not only do you bring shame to all of us nursery rhymes by being so damn pathetic, which should make you upset. But, most personally annoying, you got me to leave his side!”

She snarls and her grip locks to prevent her from crushing the pouch.

“I have been gone for two days...NEARLY THREE DAYS! YOU MISERABLE PIECE OF ABSOLUTE SH-!”

*knock-knock-knock*

“WHAT?!”

She barks at the door.

“...Is everything okay?”

It dawns on her she's being rather loud and unbecoming. She shuts her eyes, takes a few breaths, then runs a hand through her hair to center herself.

“Forgive me. That was rude. I didn't mean to snap.”

“...So...Is all well in there?”

“Yes...”

She looks at the pouch and sneers at it.

“All is well.”

Getting the key, she unlocks the door and opens it to face the guardsman who can see the now empty room.

“We're done here. Has the client been informed their problem is taken care of?”

“Yes, ma'am. I took the liberty of doing so shortly after we detained the thief.”

“Good. Retrieve our steeds. We ride for home at immediately.”

“Now?”

Her snarl shuts him up.

“Right. On it.”

He flees to get their mounts and she glares down at the pouch.

“I need to find a jar or I'm going to end up squishing this bugger.”

————————————————–

Jack can't help the grin that spreads across his face. Now that was the kind of display that stirred something in him. Is it something good, who could say? Maybe it was respect? Maybe it was admiration? Or more likely it was the enjoyment of seeing her beat the crap out of someone before dooming them. That's always something he can take delight in.

“Good girl.”

The images inside the orb get lost in the magical storm as he gets up and returns the ball to its pedestal.

[Time Skip]

It would be another day and a half before a familiar knock would be made on the door of Jack's office.

“Enter.”

He doesn't bother looking up from his book as the door opens and her soft footfalls are heard.

“I've returned, Master Jack.”

“I can see that.”

He remarks without actually looking.

“You know the drill. Tell me everything.”

She nods and shuts the door, slowly strolling over to him.

“Upon arrival, I questioned the shopkeeper and staff in case they knew anything more than what was reported. As it turns out, in the dead of night someone was sneaking in and stealing product. We came to this conclusion based on evidence around the building. So, we proceeded to set an ambush and wait for the culprit to attempt the following night. The idiot never saw it coming.”

She pulls from her pocket a small jar containing a bug.

“Meet the culprit, Master Jack. Simple Simon. Now in a more condensed form.��

That got him to glance her way.

“You kept him alive?”

His tone was that of lack of interest with just a hint of surprise.

“Not going to lie, I've been tempted to just crush him or release him into a swamp full of hungry toads. The damn fool pressed my buttons in all the ways to seriously tick me off the longer he spoke. But...”

She puts the jar down on his desk.

“He's the one that wronged you. Stole from you. Insulted you. Thought so little of you...”

The way she said that word causes his grip on the book to tighten harshly. If there's any way to get under Jack Horner's skin more, it's remotely insinuating him as little. He spent years under the humiliation of being "Little" Jack Horner. It's why he worked so hard to get out of the shadow of his nursery rhyme. His face reddens as his breathing gets more labored and he glares daggers at the jar.

“I can do this for you if need be. Just say the word and this fool will be nothing but a memory. All you have to do is give me the order.”

His hardened stare goes to her and she backs up a bit. His attention falls once more on the bug in the jar, the tiny thing cowers in its glass prison knowing full well it can't do anything as this giant of a man is now the judge, jury, and executioner of its fate. In a swift motion, he grabs the jar, gets up from his chair, and storms out of his office with a haste that would trample anyone unfortunate enough to be in his path. She is quick to follow after him. His heels cast ominous strong speedy clops on the stonework floor as he reaches his destination...the bakery.

The bakers turn and look up from their work as he enters, looking like curious and worried prairie dogs that just popped out of their holes to see a threat approaching. Jack scans the room, his eyes landing on an unoccupied oven and he makes a beeline for it. All just watch as the massive man goes to it and hurls the jar in with pure hate before slamming the doors shut, locking it for good measure.

The staff find this confusing before sudden screaming is heard. It starts rather small, even squeaky, as if from something tiny. But then it gets louder and deeper, till it is undoubtedly the recognizable voice of a man. It is an agonizing burning sound. And it's made all the more haunting by how long it lasts before smoldering silence takes hold.

“Let that be a lesson...”

The fury he once had seemed to have dwindled but was not quite gone yet.

“No one...And I mean, NO ONE, disrespects "BIG" Jack Horner!”

Without another word or even a look of confirmation, he huffs and fumes his way back toward his office. The bakers merely look at Lynsie who is smiling for reasons they probably don't want to know.

“Leave the oven be.”

She mutters.

“Give it two hours to cremate the body. Then flush the remains out and wash it thoroughly. We can't have a single oven be compromised or out of operation for long.”

She turns on her heel and waves to them over her shoulder as she begins to go after Jack.

“You're all doing a great job. Keep up the good work everyone!”

The bakers are left in a state of unease. This was not something they were used to. Body disposal is normally a weekend thing and this is still early in the week. Whoever that guy was, he was incredibly unlucky.

Back in Jack's office he leans over his desk and settles down, his hands splayed over the fine wood. His heaving chest slowly returned to a steady rhythm. It isn't often he lets his temper flare that much. But damn did it feel good. Nothing quite like getting rid of a pest that’s been bugging you.

“Are you alright?”

Her voice makes him flinch just ever so faintly and he rumbles low.

“Did you forget how to knock?”

She ignores this and shuts the door for privacy.

“That got a bit intense out there. Do you need to talk?”

Perhaps she was misreading the moment, but something felt odd and her natural instinct was telling her to be supportive. Maybe he just needed to vent his frustrations.

“You know, I'm here for you if you need to let off some-”

“Lynsie...”

His tone is slightly off. Playful, sure. But off. See for him, now that he had calmed down and collected his thoughts, it occurred to him that something wasn't quite right. A question stewed in his head that needed answering.

“That was quite the interesting means of dealing with Simon. Turning him into a bug and all. But I must say, it begs to question, where did you get the transmogrification powder?”

His question stuns her and her silence has him turn to face her with a smirk.

“Granted, it made clean up a lot easier after you had beat his face in. A bug is much lighter to carry than a full-grown man after all. But still...Magic of any kind hasn't been part of your arsenal before. So where did you get it from?”

His sterner tone makes her demeanor shift. She'd never dare lie to him. Even if it meant punishment.

“I...I made it. Using a recipe from one of your books.”

She scrunches timidly inward, her eyes looking away at the floor while holding her own hands as a means of keeping herself together.

“I figured...It could in handy during missions. I swear, I bought the materials and didn't use anything of yours!”

His amusement becomes conflicted yet he still finds a means of enjoyment in it.

“Perhaps I've been too lenient with you.”

She tentatively looks up as he beckons her with a few curls of his finger, which she does all be it with the slightest hint of hesitation. The moment she is within his range, he grabs her by the face and she freezes in place. Her eyes widen and blink rapidly with uncertain nervousness as his huge hand smothers her, keeping her silent as well as still. She's far from the same woman he witnessed in the crystal ball. No longer confident or sure of herself. This shy and frightened girl is a side only he knows of. One that he met long ago.

“You know better than to touch my things without permission. Are there any other little tricks up your sleeves? Better tell me now. I would hate to have a reason to be disappointed in you, Lynsie. And you don't want that. Do you?”

His voice is almost mocking her. But even in mockery his aura of strength is ever present and isn’t to be taken lightly. She shakes her head as best she can in his grasp and starts turning out all her pockets to show she has nothing. Accepting this, he shoves her back and she stumbles before falling onto her rear.

“You're going to be making it up to me.”

She nods weakly.

“Starting now, you'll be given extra duties to perform around here. Is that understood?”

She nods again but this time he wags his finger and clicks his tongue.

“*tsk-tsk-tsk* What are you a dog? Speak! Use your words!”

His voice raises just above his normal volume and she freaks out in a rush to apologize.

“Yes, Master Jack! I understand, Master Jack! Forgive me, Master Jack! I'll do better, Master Jack, I promise!”

Oh, how watching her squirm and revert to a begging child tickles a twisted part of him. He loves it. He loves knowing her weakness. It's how he knows she'll always be under his big purple-stained thumb.

“Good girl.”

With those two words, he could see in her eyes just how fragile and easy to manipulate she was for him. He could visualize the chains of his control binding her further to his needs. But for her, hearing those words fills her with a comforting warmth. A feeling of recognition and worth from the one she respects above all else, including herself.

This was their dynamic.

Jack, the one in a position of power and dominance that overshadows everything that he once was.

Lynsie, the subservient eager to please one that yearns for the approval that had always eluded her.

The conqueror and the follower.

It is perfect.

Perfectly toxic.

----------------

[I do plan to add more to this. I think you’d all find Jack and Lynn’s background together interesting. If this goes well I’ll begin on chapter two soon. I only made it seem like it ends here in case my brain decides to crap out on me. Best not cliff hang anyone, even myself. Thank you all and I hope this was a good read. Have a pleasant day/night. ^_^]

#jack horner #big jack horner #jack horner x oc #big jack horner fanfic #jack horner fanfic #puss in boots the last wish oc #Little Lynn #big jack horner x oc #MY WISH WAS ALWAYS YOURS #self insert

30 notes · View notes

starleska · 1 year ago

Text

welcome to...starleska's f/o round-up 2023! 🥳🥳🥳

below the cut is every single character i've had a crush on in 2023...and there are 30 in total!! 🙈💖 these are given in chronological order of fixation, and they are all new crushes (so re-entering a fixation for a character i've simped for previously doesn't count 😂) now be warned, this is a genuinely unhinged list. they are largely villains. one is a mushroom. one is a vehicle. one is a casino-themed duck-shaped robot. my autism is indiscriminate in the characters it fixates on, and they are all suitably embarrassing 😭💖 without further ado, here we go...

1. James the Red Engine | Thomas the Tank Engine

...shut up 😂💖 at the start of this year i truly lost my mind and fell headfirst into the Thomas the Tank Engine fandom (everyone there is so lovely and creative!!)...and of course, the vain train is my favourite 🙈💖 James is cute okay!! i don't need to justify myself!!! 2. 'Big' Jack Horner | Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

there's no way anyone missed this one - we are quite the tight-knit and dedicated group in the 'Big' Jack Horner fandom 😳💖 come on, look at him...a huge, powerful, obsessive, fancy-bastard collector with an affinity for magic??? he's stunning 🥴💖 i made so many lovely friends through gushing about this horrible man!!! we had so much fun making OCs to ship with him 🙈 one of the most intense fixations i've had all year, and one of the best villains we've seen in years...he is fantastic 🥰 3. Pizzahead | Pizza Tower

i don't know what's in the water of Pizza Tower but it's impossible to be normal about any character you like from that game 🙈💖 of course the evil sentient pizza slice took the top spot, he's so cartoony and ridiculous!!! the amount of power he exerts is also quite the draw 🤭💖 i'm not gonna lie there's a couple other characters from this game i may get into later...we'll see 😉 4. Fingers | Dead End: Paranormal Park

have you heard this guy's voice. can you blame me. deliciously evil fruity monstrosity with supernatural powers? sign me up to whatever sinister scheme Fingers has going on now or in the future 👉👈 he hits a lot of boxes...between the cabaret-style makeup, the posh, dismissive and manipulative personality and the inexplicable Eldritch body, he was always gonna be a crush 🤭 5. M.O.D.O.K. | Marvel

wheeze okay, this was originally a JOKE!!! @thelighttasteslikelasagna sent in this message joking that i look like i'd find M.O.D.O.K. hot, and i was really angry about it for five minutes...and then i discovered the stop-motion cartoon where he's exactly the kind of cringefail malewife villain i enjoy (in the Augustus St. Cloud vein), and the rest is history 🙈💖 definitely one of the silliest crushes i had this year, but he holds a special place in my heart :3c 6. Gargamel | The Smurfs

nah man i was on some serious mental illness at the start of this year 💀 i just can't help it when bad guys are like this, alright!!! Hank Azaria's performance as Gargamel is sooo silly and over-the-top, i couldn't help but love every second he was on screen 🙈💖 Gargamel's just a whole lot of fun!!! who doesn't love a magic-wielding freak hellbent on the destruction of a group of little creatures?? (i cannot and will not be taking any questions at this time 😶) 7. Wally Darling | Welcome Home

my God, the Wally Darling fixation hit the entire Internet like a train 🤭💖 soft-voiced, ambiguously-moraled rizz puppet that he is, how could we not all fall head-over-heels? i have to thank this guy for throwing me headfirst back into fanfic writing, as the whole Welcome Home story really inspired me...not to mention all the lovely folks who wanted to imagine different ways of getting to hold Wally's hand 🥰 hooray for our pretty puppet boy!! 8. Killa Harkan | John Wick: Chapter 4

...yes, i know, it's funny that Killa's the first of two cartoonishly evil German-accented bad guys with sleight of hand tricks and gold teeth on the list this year 😂💖 sitting in the cinema, the second he opened his mouth my partner just turned and stared at me, because they knew. i refuse to apologise for appreciating a really awful bastard - especially one who dresses so sharply 😉 9. Ian Hawke | Alvin and the Chipmunks

yet another member of the 'it started off as a joke...' club 🤭💖 listen, Ian serves!!! we can't resist a smarmy music producer/manage type, can we? Ian's in the same camp as Gargamel for being a deeply evil man whose capacity for doing harm is directed at little creatures. all i'm saying is, he can sign me up for a dodgy deal any day 🥴 10. Myc Cellium | Inside Job

i can't tell if it's my monsterfucker tendencies or my consummate attraction to Brett Gelman but the crass sentient mushroom got me down bad 😭💖 he's just such a menace!! he's got that intoxicating combo of being horribly socially inappropriate and an actual outcast...fellas, Myc was fixation bait for me 😭 11. Klaus Kickenklober | Sing 2

i don't care if you think you're not a furry, someone can and will get you from the Sing franchise, and that is a threat 🙈💖 yesss laugh it up, Star's got another stern and vaguely European cartoon villain added to the list 😂 i just find Klaus so impossibly delightful!!! he'd be a terrible teacher to have in real life, but in fiction, i think i could fix him :3c 12. The Spot | Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

ohoho, i know you guys were living for The Spot fixation because i remember your reaction to the x Readers 😉 look at him and his incredible design!!! the transformation of The Spot from weak laughable villain to reality-bending monstrosity had me by the throat...and i can't wait to see more of him when the next Spider-Verse drops 👀 13. Mad Mod | Teen Titans

MAD. BLOODY. MOD!!!!! i think our favourite British bastard has to take the crown (literally and figuratively) as my strongest fixation out of the whole of 2023, i lost my mind over this guy. he just consumed my every waking thought!!! 🙈 the style, the voice, the unbelievable engineering skill...Mad Mod is one of those once-in-a-lifetime f/os that you know you'll be obsessed with for a very long time 😳💖 i look back so fondly on those wonderful few months of Mad Mod fandom resurgence, and how that still continues today...here's hoping even more people find out about him and develop their own crushes 😉 shout-out to the lovely @iriso-page who suggested him and Music Meister to me 🙈💖

14. Control Freak | Teen Titans

sdfgdf okay back on form with the fat dweebs, i know, i know!!!! my ravenous Mad Mod fixation wasn't enough to ignore Control Freak, one of the most delightfully stupid villains in Teen Titans...!!! he hits all my buttons (ha!) and i genuinely think his design and powers are kind of epic. would love to see him utilised in the future 😉 (i am never beating the Discord kitten allegations...) 15. Ken | Barbie

well, this particular blond himbo was quite the surprise!! 🤭💖 i'm not usually the one to go for such a stereotypical hottie, but Ryan Gosling plays Ken as so unhinged and...off for the whole movie, he activated the same neurons which come with the weirdest of my crushes 🙈💖 Ken's a misguided sweetheart and i'd love to help him feel a little bit wanted;;; 16. Buck Ruffler the Duck Shuffler | Toontown: Corporate Clash

fell into the wonderful world of Toontown: Corporate Clash and imprinted on this fucker like...well, like a baby duck 😂💖 is this not the most spectacular design for an original Cog you've ever seen?! i love that Buck is an absolutely scrambled robot with a gambling addiction, and i think he'd be lovely (and hilarious) company 🥰

17. Barnaby | Billie Bust Up

ohhhh yesssss Billie Bust Up caught my attention with this sinister goofball!!!! fancy, flamboyant and very into murder...Barnaby has all the traits for any Tumblr Sexyman, and i cannot wait for the full game to drop so we can see even more of him 👀

18. The Mad Hatter/Jervis Tetch | Batman

Jervis Tetch my beloved!! this has been the year of fancy blonds in top-hats, as well as deeply silly hypnotists, and Jervis kicked off this trend with a bang 🙈💖 i'm a Mad Hatter fan generally but B:TAS Jervis is a special kind of pretty stalker, and that voice is delicious 🥴 thanks to him for kicking off an Alice in Wonderland fixation and for finally getting me into drinking tea...the things we do for our crushes, eh? 🥰 19. Music Meister/Darius Chapel | Batman

and here is the first character played by Neil Patrick Harris who made it onto this year's list!!! 🙈💖 another camp, theatrical Batman villain to add to my collection...gorgeous voice, such an immense sense of style, and wonderfully good fun!! i think more people should get a little obsessed with the Music Meister 😉 20. Buggy the Clown | One Piece

none of you can judge me for this one - i remember all the TikTok edits!!! 😂💖 Buggy is pathetic and so much fun - i wasn't expecting to enjoy him as much as i did!! although my fixation for him may have been short-lived, my love for him certainly isn't 🥰 21. Pat Butcher | BBC Ghosts

ohhhh, every now and again a little sweetheart will get me right in the feelings, and Pat Butcher is added proudly to my f/o collection as the second Yorkshireman (next to Salad Fingers 😭). i just love what an upbeat, lovely man he is!! he's so soft and warm to everyone he meets and tries his best to do everything right by his friends...i'd love to cuddle with him 🥺 22. Josh Levy | The Eltingville Club

a classic return to form with Josh Levy, à la Comic Book Guy and Control Freak...really telling on myself by collecting these horrible greasy nerds who would 100% call me something derogatory if i tried to talk to them 💀 i appreciate every last one of The Eltingville Club but Josh, as a failed writer who remains just as toxic as he was when he was a teen, is my undisputed favourite 🙈💖 23. Swan | Phantom of the Paradise

oh God, reawakening my crush on Paul Williams by discovering Swan damn near killed me!!!! 😭💖 i was so obsessed with this man as a kid and the moment i saw him as Swan in POTP i felt intense attraction and gender envy in equal parts;;;; Swan's whole aesthetic and demeaning, inhuman approach to people is impossibly sensual, and i can't overstate enough how little evil dudes in tinted shades will always get me down bad 🙈💖 24. Kinger | The Amazing Digital Circus

my love for Kinger was such a pleasant surprise!! 🤭💖 sweet, anxious fella that he is, all i want to do is get him out of that digital hellscape and ensure he can wrap up in as many blankets as he likes!!! i love his always-on-the-edge-of-a-breakdown portrayal and am so eager to learn more about him and his backstory 👀 25. Peter Gregory | Silicon Valley

ahhh, kicking it the old-fashioned way by getting extremely invested in the most autistic character on the show (and that's saying something, given the high neurodivergent coding of everyone in Silicon Valley 🙈💖). Peter's style and methods of communication are traits i simply find attractive in real life, and although he sadly wasn't with us long, he absolutely stole the show ✨ 26. 'Action' Jack Barker | Silicon Valley

given my love of nerds it's no shocker that Silicon Valley hit me with two f/os, and 'Action' Jack Barker - the tech-field Colin Robinson - was a surefire entry 😳💖 what is it about these milquetoast men who are so whitebread yet are capable of such terrible things which gets me every time?! Jack is such a fun character and i'm glad we got as much of him as we did 🙈 27. Avery | Pokémon: Sword and Shield

i cannot believe none of you guys told me about Avery, the most amazingly dressed character i've ever seen in the whole of Pokémon 🙈💖 shhhh he is so very pretty and petty and his powers are incredibly cool. i just love everything about him and would delight in helping him develop a real sense of self-esteem, because he does not deserve the dismissal he receives from his family 😭💖 28. Matthew Patel | Scott Pilgrim

oh my God, heart in my MOUTH seeing Matthew Patel get the glow-up villain arc he so desperately deserved!!!!! 😭💖💖💖 Matthew is just the epitome of style and power in Scott Pilgrim Takes Off, and it was so fantastic getting to see him grow as a character and get self-actualised. plus his fight scenes were some of the coolest things i've ever seen. Matthew can i have your number please 🥺 29. The Toymaker | Doctor Who

!!!!!!!!!! i don't know if you guys can tell, but i really love the Toymaker...and even predicted that he'd completely consume my mind months before we got The Giggle 🙈💖 e v e r y t h i n g about him just gets me so bad. his reality-bending, his teasing attitude, his ridiculous accents, his gorgeous costumes, his emotional inconsistency, his tragic backstory...god, if i so much as look at him smiling i melt 🥴💖 characters played by Neil Patrick Harris really get me!! i'm so proud to be modding a server dedicated to the Toymaker now, and have met so many brilliant, wonderful friends through him and falling back into Doctor Who!!! i think we're all going to be brainrotting over him for quite some time 😉💖 30. Dr Mark Fry | Chicken Run: Dawn of the Nugget

Dr Fry, rushing in at the finish line!!! 🤭 the second my pals saw this guys they were all spamming me, begging me to watch Dawn of the Nugget!!! and ooooh i was noooot prepared for the specific brand of soft creepy genius he is 💖 even if they'd played Dr Fry purely as your run-of-the-mill mad scientist he would've gotten me bad, but they just had to make him equal parts freaky and brilliant with just a touch of arrogance, didn't they?? Melisha scored well 🤤 (also, three whole Yorkshiremen in my collection now!! is it the accent? 😭) aaaaand that's everyone!!! phew, is anyone else out of breath? 🥵 what a wonderful, silly year of fixations this has been 🤭💖 thank you all for being here, brainrotting happily alongside me for some of these characters, and for all the other characters you love!!! i hope 2024 is awesome to you, and that many more fictional characters are around the corner, ready to make you smile 😉

64 notes · View notes