#big boss duke

[buk0wskis]

new playlist alert ‼️‼️

very very excited i was able to finally get my hands on rick (2003), and as terrible of a person duke can be, his vibe was fun to turn into a mix. check that out here!

[flownintothesun]

 ⋆ ✰ ⋆ ───    ❝  𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐲.  ❞ @ 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐞!

                            ⋆ ✰ ⋆ ─── 𝟒𝟎𝟒 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝. ( @ofwealthandtaste )

      𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐒, 𝐖𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐋𝐄𝐘 𝐇𝐀𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅 that he works for a supergenius who knows damn good and well what they’re doing — because right now it sure as hell doesn’t feel like it. Right now, he feels like he’s walking in a room full of eggshells in glass slippers, complete with the formal wear — and one wrong move will send everything shattering to bits. He knows Coco likes to keep an eye on anyone making a name for themselves in the underworld — it’s just that they’re London’s kingpin and they could probably find someone better to send off to France — maybe someone French? Maybe someone who knows what the hell they’re doing here? He’s never found his own strangeness beautiful — but it’s unlikely that this man is talking about him. More likely, he’s just making conversation. It’s all Westley can do not to fidget.

     The truth is that he sees beauty everywhere — and he sees ugliness, too. Nearly everything in his life is a dichotomy — and it makes him hesitant. Looking down for a moment in what could pass for a sort of charming bashfulness, he smiles. It’s not a perfect smile — one side of his mouth raises more than the other and really, it’s more a smirk than anything else — complete with dimples he never did outgrow. Raising his gaze, he leans against the wall. Is it okay to lean? His voice is out of place when he speaks...but then, it is that in London too. As though it had never found a home. “Then you find beauty in broken things. Isn’t it wiser to admire something more...traditional...more safe?”

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

MY THOUGHTS EXACTLYYYYYYYY

So the problem with making a royalty au with the batfam is the sucession

Dick

Pros: he's the first and the eldest. He became/inherited Batman when Bruce died

Cons: Bludhaven, was not formally adopted in canon

Jason

Pros: when Dick moves to/is given Bludhaven he's the next child

Cons: he canonically died, has beef with the bats, publicly opposes Bruce

Cassandra

Pros: third eldest, my fav headcanon is she becomes Batman when Bruce retires

Cons: last adopted, not great at public speaking or engagement

Tim

Pros: comes from a wealthy family, became the boss (inherited? idr) of WE (Bruce's company)

Cons: not the oldest and not the blood son

Damian

Pros: the only bio child, powerful maternal family

Cons: illegitimate, youngest child, probably/already the heir to Ra's kingdom??, my fav headcanon is that when he grows up he ironically wants nothing to do with either inheritances (Batman or LoA)

[yandereforme]

Yan!Mafia Batfamily x reader

Part 1:Introduction and Duke

TW: Mentions of murder, mention of harassment

After Bruce’s parents died, Bruce began having the same mindset Red Hood/Jason had in canon; You can’t eradicate crime, but you can control it.

He soon built a persona of the bat, a mafia boss that everyone knew and feared/loved. This is a less moral Batman, who doesn’t personally kill, but has nothing against murder if it’s just.(Justice remains a part of his mission.)

This leads to a slightly more complicated bat family, with each of them playing a vital role as their counterparts, and Robin being the term used for shadowing the big bat, and learning the ropes. (If you want me to expand on that part, let me know$

No one knows the Wayne’s are the Batfam, but they all know they are vaguely connected, with many suspecting a relationship between Bruce and The Bat or The Bat being an illegitimate child of Thomas Wayne(though neither theory is voiced in earshot of the Wayne’s. Connected to the Bat or not, the Wayne family is still terrifying.)

Most people are pretty scared of the Waynes and the Bats like, fearing them and avoiding them 

You, on the other hand, could give less of a shit about them.

You are an orphan with good grades and even better computer skills. So while everyone believed you lived with your parents who traveled, and that you were 17 to your actual age of 13, you got away with living on your own and working a part time job. Working as a waitress wasn’t terrible, though you occasionally had to deal with Karens and harassment.

However, after a terrible night at work where a Karen poured her drink over you and a drunk idiot slapped your ass, you had run out of willingness to deal with bullshit. So, when a trust fund brat tried to make you move from your seat in the library, you refused, glaring at the blurry person standing next to you, ignoring the gasps from the students around you.

You expected him to yell at you, or let his companion, who was glaring hard at you, deal with you. Instead, he spoke briefly with his friend in a language you didn’t recognize. After a minute or so, they both sat down and quietly studied with you

Duke was charmed by your behavior. It has been a long time since anyone outside of the family had said no to him. The look of anger in your eyes was belied by pure exhaustion. He knew you had no clue who he was, and you were too tired to care.

You were interesting. So Duke didn’t let Damian yell at you or (attempt to) intimidate you.(while Damien was very intimidating when he had to be, Duke had a feeling you would not care in the slightest.)

So Duke convinced Damian to sit with him while he observed you studying, instead of discussing Bat business like they had planned. He had known of you, and Duke remembered you being in a few of his classes, but this stunt caught his interest too much to let you go.

You weren’t sure why, but apparently the Wayne kid (or Duke as he insisted you call him) seemed charmed by you basically telling him to fuck off. He started partnering with you in classes when he would normally work alone. He started eating his lunches with you in the library or in the auditorium, even having his brother join you on occasion.

You slowly got used to his presence, and even became begrudgingly fond of him and his little brother, even though his brother tended to stare at you more often than not. You hadn’t had very many friends for a long time, so maybe this was gonna be a good thing.

A big thing with Duke Thomas was that while he may seem calm, he is one of the most calculating of the Yanderes. He will always appear to be on your side, but unable to help you. He will become one of your closest confidence trusted friend , all without you realizing how much of a manipulative and possessive Yandere he is. He just knows that letting you have more of an illusion of power will help in the long run of making you like him.

So for now he’ll be content, letting you slowly come to him, similar to a feral cat. You’ll adore him soon enough. Come to think of it, you might make an excellent addition to the family.~

Edit: Life has been hitting me like a semi truck. I won’t go into too much detail, but I just ended a long-term relationship, had one of my grandparents die, and the other have a stroke. There’s a bunch of other stuff I also could mention, but I don’t wanna talk about it. Updates will be very sporadic for a long time I think. I’m sorry and I really hope you guys understand. Got enough motivation today to finally finish the first part of the Mafia au. Don’t know when I’ll be updating any of the other ones. I really hope you like this.

[svtcrus]

───── `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃 BABY LOVE ME EVENT SERIES

FORBIDDEN ; WRIOTHESLEY X AFAB!Reader

warning : office sex, slight degradation, ass slapping, not proofread (i apologize, i tried getting this done as fast as i could), just smutty so MDNI

synopsis : you and his grace have formed quite the bond. a bond that isn't quite typical between a boss and his secretary.

who would've thought, you're caught up in the handcuffs of the warden, the duke himself. you were–trying at least–playing a joke on him, to liven up the gloominess that's sought all over the fortress.

such a harmless joke really. yet wriothesley himself decided to take this joke into his own hands and twist it all around.

you had simply just wanted to tease him a slight, you wanted to see how much of a rise you could get out of him despite your willful obedience.

so you took it upon yourself to wear a flaring skirt instead of the your usual skin tight leggings–which wriothesley has secretly grown to adore– it was quite humid and hot in the fortress anyways. perhaps you would talk to him about the fortress's air conditioning.

"your grace, the fortress feels quite warm today doesn't it? the temperature felt quite different that-"

the duke in question had raised his head, eyes widening at your change of look. your half assed explanation is slowly fading in his head, for those dark eyes of his began to trace every curve of your body.

archons. he shouldn't. this is clearly forbidden. you're his secretary, and he's your boss, the duke. this is so... wrong?

having formed quite the formidable friendship with the duke was something inevitable. he had recently thought of having an aide to assist him on more serious matters, especially after the incident with the primordial water.

so now here you were, 6 months into the job and having formed quite a tight knit bond with his grace. however today, didn't seem to be quite gracefu and instead lustful to your situation.

"you're quite the slut aren't you?" large calloused hands are rubbing against your sides, said duke has you stuck on his lap. skirt pulled up revealing your behind for everyone to see if they were to walk in.

"acting all innocent, when really you're the most guiltiest person out there. and in front of me?... how bold." plump ass on his growing bulge is all for him to see. black lace panties too? gosh, he feels like the luckiest man alive.

such a view causes his breath to hitch with bitten lips, meanwhile you sat atop of him. your hands holding up your skirt as your cheeks burn red. his own are feeling you up... until you were squeaking with a whine. his palm hits you out of reality, and you can't help but to hold yourself up on the edge of his death.

this reaction he gets from you has him blooming with pride. only he can make you this way. only he should be the one to have you twist and bend the rules that one should oh so be obediently obeying.

"sweetheart, do you really want to do this?" pulling you back onto his chest, holding by your waist. a man so cold has never felt ever more warmer against you.

he's whispering into your ear, and now both your hot breaths that speak of anticipation can be heard more clearly between the two of you. god, you want him so badly

"m'please wrio... I've never wanted something as bad as this... please." and that's all he needed before he's pounding into you on his big desk. quills and pens thrown, all scattered around indicating the feverent lust that is happening in his very office. anyone could come in at any moment. heavens even poor sigewinne could witness the absolute debauchery you were both comitting. yet at the same time such rational thoughts have been clouded by your irrational need for wriothesley.

"m'fuck..! wrio—! too much!" you're gripping aimlessely at something, anything, to pace yourself with wriothesleys pounding rhythm. he's addicted, fully hooked on you. the way your walls squeeze around him and how beautiful moans you let out as he enters you, the sound of skin against skin echoing in his office. he's completely high off of you.

"hold it sweetie, because I'm not done with you yet— fuck!" wrio is bending down, placing needy kisses along your nape and shoulders. his grip on your waist is tighter, your cries and pleas only getting louder. the thought of being quiet completely out the door.

"mm– wrio i'm gonna–!" your head is practically digging into the table, wriothesleys pace seems to only have gotten more forceful. you can feel the knot tying inside, and with one more thrust you cry from the euphoria of your release.

scarred, muscular arms wrap around your body tightly. the deep grunt from wrio vibrates against your back. you both stay like this for a few moments, the sound of your hot panting being the only sound in the room.

yet before you could even exhale one more time, you're flipped around so that your now eye to eye with the duke. and his gaze has only gotten darker.

"your grac-?" before you can even protest, it's replaced with another moan. you're biting your lip again, and your hands instinctively wrap themselves around him.

"i told you sweetheart. i'm not done with you."

@svtcrus || 07.11.24 ; baby love me event

©️ all rights reserved. do not copy , repost , alter , plagiarize my work.

[heartofjasmina]

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[to-the-stars8]

The Waynes' Nanny

Notes: So, this is my oopsy of adding another story to my roster, but oh well. Here's my other note: Just a little side note. To make this story work, I had to de-age the majority of the characters. So, Dick is 15, Cass 10, Jason 9, Tim 7, Duke 6, and Damian 4. Just FYI. Obvi The Nanny Inspired

Bruce Wayne x Reader, Batfamily, platonically, x reader

Summary: One day, after getting fired from your job by your ex, you somehow ended up in Wayne Manor as the family's new nanny. Working with six kids is tough enough, but the handsome, rich, and emotionally confused father, billionaire Bruce Wayne, who is just too charming makes it a bit more difficult as your feelings for him confuse you. Nonetheless, you love the job and the kids, but soon enough you realize that maybe you're falling in love with the boss, too.

Pilot Pt. 1

“You have to be kidding me, fired?” You said shocked, leaning over the counter.

Your boyfriend then quickly added, “And, I’m breaking up with you.” 

The words could not come off your lips. Instead, you babbled for a good thirty seconds before just turning on your heel to leave. You stopped a couple of times to say something, but the shock was still settling in. It wasn’t until you were outside, watching people on the street that your senses came back. Turning around, you sucked in a breath and threw open the store door.

You pointed at your ex and loudly announced, “You have a small dick, and I’m collecting unemployment! So, hah!” 

Not feeling the victory, but glad that there were more than a dozen people to continue the rumor of your boyfriend’s supposedly small penis, you left.

Luckily, you were quick to find another gig thanks to a family friend. Granted, you hated going door to door trying to sell insurance in Gotham, but it paid you just enough not to be out on the street. This week, however, you were assigned to the other end of the city—The rich part. And, it certainly did live up to your expectations. These people had yards and gardens, and the air even smelled better. If you could only find a rich man, you think you’d be very happy in such a place. 

You looked down at the list of addresses your boss had given you before looking back up at the impressive sight of the house. With a sigh, you pressed the buzzer on the gate and went over your script. 

“Hello, my name is…” 

Before you could finish a British accent came through the buzzer. “Are you here for the nanny position?”

Looking around, you didn’t see a reason as to why you shouldn’t say yes. Absent-mindedly, you said, “I could be.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Oh, um, yes! Yes, I am.” It couldn’t hurt 

Suddenly, another buzz and the sound was clicking of the gate unlocking. Cautiously, you pushed your way through and you headed up the path to the front door. It was a near quarter mile to get to the house and up a hill. By the time you got up to the front of the house, you were winded and slightly sweaty. At the top of the stairs stood an old man in a suit, looking down at you with indifference. Slowly, you climbed the stairs to him. 

“You really gotta warn a girl if she’s gonna take a hike,” You huffed. 

“Most people drive,” The old man said, and you recognized the accent from the buzzer. 

You snickered at the old man, following him in, and you were amazed by just how wonderful the place was. As you entered, you did a turn, and you were amazed by just how big the house—No, mansion—was. 

“Would you like me to present your resume to Mr. Wayne?” Asked the man. 

Luckily, you were quick on your feet, “No, I’ll do it myself. Thank you.”

The man relented, giving you a disbelieving look, and went away. You sat down in one of the chairs in the foyer, quickly pulling out some papers to write some type of passable resume. As you were going for a pen, you realized quickly that you didn’t have one. Panicked, you looked around for one. 

“Ugh,” A voice said, and a boy no older than seven or eight stumbled from a doorway. On him, fake blood and a knife. He cried, “I’m dying!” before collapsing onto the floor. 

“You wouldn’t happen to have a pen, would you?” You asked, but the boy didn’t respond. Defeated, you decided quickly what you said as you saw the old man and a younger, much more handsome return. 

“Tim,” The younger man said. “We’ve talked about this. You can’t scare the guests.”

The boy opened his eyes, “I'm studying people's reactions to gore and pain.”

The man rolled his eyes before turning his attention back to you. He held out his hand toward you to shake, you took it and instantly liked the way his grip was strong. “I’m Bruce Wayne—”

“Oh, yeah! I’ve seen you on TV,” You said excitedly. “I loved the black suit you wore for that ceremony in the park last month.”

Mr. Wayne seemed taken aback by the compliment, but thank you anyway. “Just follow me into the kitchen. We can talk more there.” As he started to lead you away, he turned to the boy still lying on the floor. “Tim, go clean up, please.”

“I will, but only because you said please!” The boy cried out. 

Mr. Wayne shook his head and asked you not to mind him for now. Smiling, you replied that it was no big deal, kids were going to be kids either way. He seemed to agree with you on that and asked you more about yourself. You told him as much as you could think of, not willing or wanting to hold anything back. 

When you finally sat at the kitchen table did you stop talking to let Mr. Wayne talk, but he seemed more pleased to listen. Though, you knew better than to rattle on more than necessary. Maybe, you thought, this was why so many women thought him to be such a charming guy. 

“Can I see your resume, then?” He asked. 

Laughing nervously, you said, “Oh, uh, well, you see, I lost it on my way over here.”

“Is that right?” Mr. Wayne said, sounding like he didn’t entirely believe you. 

“Yes! Yes, it’s the damnedest thing,” You said. “I always seem to have these bouts of terrible luck.”

“Uh-huh,” He said. 

You were going to answer when a voice called out, “Dad!” 

Just then, two boys, one about fifteen and the other around ten, walked in. They seemed surprised to see you when they entered, glancing at their father before telling you hello. You got up, walking over to the boys and cupping their cheeks. 

“My, look how handsome!” You looked over your shoulder at Mr. Wayne. “And those pretty blue eyes! They must get them from you.”

“We’re adopted,” The younger one said. “And I’m Jason.”

You grinned and bent over to look at the boy. “It’s nice to meet you, I’m…”

“You’re the new nanny?” The older boy said. 

You started to answer, but Mr. Wayne cut you off. He told the boy, named Richard, that he could be nicer to you. Richard, or Dick as he called himself unfortunately, protested that Bruce was shuffling his responsibilities on some random lady from the inner city. Bruce was quick to dismiss him to his room, stating that they would speak later, and immediately apologized to you. 

“A kid makes a smart-ass comment, what’re you gonna do?” You smiled. 

“Right,” Bruce cleared his throat, not paying attention to what you were saying. “Well, those two were the oldest boys, I have one girl between them. Then, it’s Tim, Duke, and Damian. My youngest is four.”

“Trying to build a basketball team, Mr. Wayne?” You couldn’t help, but laugh at your joke. He didn’t seem as amused by it, so you quickly went quiet. 

“Yes, well, thank you for coming, but I don’t think I’m in the mood to hire sales girls from off the street.”

You rolled your eyes, mumbling that you could do it and that you had plenty of experience in taking care of children as you babysat a lot when you were a teenager. Mr. Wayne didn’t seem to hear anything you said, though, nor the phone ringing off the hook. 

“Alfred! Will you get that,” He called, seeming a bit stressed. 

“Oh, you cannot be that rich not to answer your phone,” You said, getting up and picking up the phone from the receiver. Putting it to your ear, you answered, “Wayne residence.”

“Give me that,” Mr. Wayne said and snatched the phone from your hand. “Hello?”

He went back and forth with the person on the other line, talking about how he needed a nanny. Yet, he seemed to be getting nowhere. The entire time, you laid yourself in front of him as he tried to talk to the person on the other end to get him a nanny. After a minute or two, he put the receiver down and looked at you. 

You grinned, knowing that you got the job. “You’re hired—On a trial basis!”

“Oh, thank you, Mr. Wayne!” You threw yourself at him, squeezing him tight. “You won’t regret it.”

“Right,” Bruce cleared his throat. “Well, I’ll have Alfred show you to your room—”

“I get to live here?” You asked excitedly. 

Bruce almost smiled, but held it back. “Yes. If you like.”

“If I like,” You laughed like he was joking. “Of course. Oh, it’s going to be great.”

Mr. Wayne nodded, acting like he believed you, but didn’t know for sure. He wondered if he made the right choice not only for his children but for himself as well. Since he only knew you for half an hour, he found himself being intrigued by you.

Despite this, how he felt didn’t matter. All that did matter was if the children liked you and if you were competent enough to look after them. After all, it wasn’t like he was going to fall in love with you. 

[deaddovedecadence]

what about a mob batfam! au?

Bruce: The big Boss

Dick: The underboss of drugs

Jason: the sibling that ran away and is working to take them down (he’s going to get kidnapped back tbh)

Cass: enforcer

Tim: The right hand

Duke: underboss of money laundering

Damian: the soon to be left hand

-

how does this become yandere you may be thinking. What if Jason makes a friend and the entire family is suspicious only to realize that you genuinely care about him like they do (just less possessively ofc) and they’re like “if we bring them home then we can get jason too”

(BTW the author hates cops and cops will be portrayed negatively in this story)

UPDATE: There is an actually story for this now! here or if you prefer ao3 here

[onnahu]

Steph, Duke and Jason bond over not being born Fucking Rich and believing that billioners shouldn't exist and just you know. Normal shit. They give a pass for Bruce bc of Batman and all the charity and Tim bc he is (was?) a minor and is not a billionaire level rich. Dick is not one of them bc in his childhood it wasn't a big deal in the circus and he was showed into a billionaire life at like, 8, so he also count's as a Fucking Rich. Cass's mostly not there bc I just feel like she simply do not care about bitching about things like that, and also have no concept of monet whatsoever.

And one time Steph or Duke just throws in how the 1% hoard like 40% of world's wealth instead of letting it circle in economy and how that's a big cause of poverty, and Jason is like 'yeah, eat the rich' and then Steph just goes 'actually, aren't you super rich from your crime lord stunt?'

And Jason realises that he may not be the 1%, but he is Fucking Rich, and he's horrified. So they bully him for a while (he is also bullying. He's bullying himself) bc sure, he needs it to be a vigilante of his kind if he doesn't want to go off Bruce's money, but it still isn't a reason to have so much. (It's not only a crime lord money. He had a starter pack from Talia that's like 1/3 of it and he is shamelessly stealing of Lex Luthor, Bruce and other billionairs)

Anyway, they cane to the conclusion that he needs to return the money to the circulation. He leaves himself a million or three (idk how much he'd need to keep all of his safehouses and shit) and the rest goes into creating a bunch of independent little bussinesses and buying off others, but in form of like, sponsoring. The bosses have pretty much a full control over money, they get an absurdly big budget and create it without S, D, or J's imput, and later they just cut off like 20% procent of income or smth to pay them as the official owners. That 20% goes into creating more bussinesses, and at some point the three owns half of the bussinesses in Gotham (Duke and Steph demanded to have a part in it and also an access to the account they made for all that bussiness shit)

I just think it would be funny if at some point someone realised that the owners owners of so many bussinesses are the same three people (Helena Thomas, Morgan Brown and Todd Peters). They lost their count at the first 5, so honestly they wouldn't notice if some of them just stopped paying, but they still create new. They have no idea what they're doing.

Babs knows it all and is pissed that she is not a part of 'fuck the rich' club. Because of that she doesn't help them even when they beg over official documents.

[thelibrarian1895]

Bruce is the restraining bolt

Let's say that Bruce "dies" again. Tim, of course, figures it's another temporary thing and bonus he doesn't need to risk another organ to prove it this time. That being said, Bruce isn't around to stop them now. Dick doesn't feel the need to be the dad this time since Bruce will be back. He's the big brother, the babysitter at best. Jason has never felt the need to step up into a parental role for any of his sibs before and he's not going to stop now. Cass won't kill, that is her line, beyond that, she's not anyone's parent either. Tim is one bad day away from being a supervillain, he seriously needs a vacation but at the same time he needs something that will keep him busy or he will get paranoid (thanks B for the trauma) and so he's not going to stop anyone, Duke doesn't have the experience to know when or if he should stop any of his sibs, steph and barbara are staying out of it as while they are family they consider themselves cousins at best no matter what B says, and no one is going to let Damian boss them around.

That being established, B is gone, Alfred is fretting but not inclined to stop anyone anyway, the kids decide that while the bat is away...

When Bruce returns, Alfred is just returning from a spa trip his beloved grandchildren insisted that he go on since he deserved a nice break and they even investigated to make sure the spa wasn't a scam or front! While Alfred was gone and Bruce was "dead", all Black Mask's warehouses had been mysteriously destroyed with large explosions that Bruce had previously forbidden because he was worried about collateral damage since some of those warehouses were sandwiched by other storage facilities and places where people squatted. (Steph and Jason, both very affronted because they are professionals B! And yes, there were also glitter bombs involved, it made the fire extra pretty with the different colors).

Furthermore, Lex Luthor is no longer the majority shareholder of his own company anymore, that would be Tim now, and all of Lex's employees are rejoicing since they're all getting a pay raise that brings them from the legal bare minimum to not just a living wage but twice that plus benefits even for those who aren't full timers (which is basically everyone, lex never wanted to get benefits for anyone). Lex is also being investigated for embezzling, money laundering, domestic and international terrorism, and the trafficking of minors (kon). Lex chose a very bad time to make Kon sad and Tim took that personally.

Bruce also discovered that Tim's childhood home, aka the drake's old place next door for the given value of next door, has been demolished and that whole area is now a botanical garden and registered wildlife sanctuary. (Damian with assistance and permission from Tim since technically the land was in Tim's name, Damian persuaded Poison Ivy to help while also monitoring to ensure she didn't slip in anything detrimental and also breaking up the exotic animal smuggling ring that B had been trying to keep from him to prevent this very thing. Tim, in the meantime, just happened to have a number of people on hand more than happy to work in a botanical garden/wildlife sanctuary and no, none of those people were ever formerly ninja who answered to Ra's before realizing that Red Robin was a far better employer, why would you ever think they were?)

And of course, the Joker is dead. None of his kids are fessing up to this. If pressed, they will cry, even Jason, and say that they thought Joker killed their dad and they wished it had been them because they missed him so much! (It was Dick and Barbara, Babs faked the paperwork for Dick to go in as an orderly, Dick, in disguise, gave the Joker altered medication via injection and made sure to get some air bubbles in for good measure, official COD was a totally natural brain aneurysm, so sad, no autopsy needed, burn the body)

Duke was a bit of a wild card and ended up hanging out with Selina, picking up a few extra skills, and using those skills to break into various mansions and apartments of the filthy rich to steal back stolen art and artifacts and return them to museums in their country of origin so they can be enjoyed by everyone (he watched indiana jones recently and the "it belongs in a museum" popped into his head a lot, he did wear a particular hat while he was committing his heists) It was nice potential step mother and step son bonding time

And finally, Cass causes Ra's Al Ghul to lose a particular appendage, one that the lazarus pit hasn't been able to grow back for him thanks to a little consultation with Constantine beforehand. She then went to hang out at Themyscira and got some very pretty bracelets.

Bruce is thinking very hard about just turning around. He takes a nap instead and then he lectures his beloved nutcases about personal safety, the law, respecting what is essentially dibs on certain super villains, and all the other boring stuff he's tried to impose on them over the years.

[buk0wskis]

wait actually before i go to bed. i lowkey should’ve said this a while back when i actually got my hands on it BUT if anyone is curious abt rick (2003), the only way i was able to find it on my own was on amazon as an $8 dvd (and that included tax!). went through a lot of 🏴‍☠️ing sites, and i mean a lot, and kept coming up empty handed.

however, through some fandangling, i do actually have a link to watch it. in pretty good quality, too! i’m eepy so idk if hyperlinking it is like, the best idea? so i’m just gonna say if anyone’s looking to watch, shoot me a dm! i can send it to you there :)

[walpu]

walp walp hear me out

remember that trailblazer scene with firefly and how she just just gets stabby stabbed by the creature (memory zone meme i think)

and + Aventurine having access to the 'real' dreamscape, combine that with bodyguard! reader who will go through hell and back to make sure Aventurine will. Live.

reader follows aven during the entirety of the Penacony quest, including when Black Swan teleports the both of them to the real memory zone. (also, does anyone else feel like bodyguard! reader and Trailblazer would be besties... no, just me?)

now, keep in mind, Aven and reader have a... complicated bond. IPC workers here and there say their dating, the Trailblazer has straightup asked if they would just get a room (you get their vibe, you can go along with the secret assassin! bodyguard! reader req i sent in)

a little bit more insight on their dynamic (again, going with the assassin reader thing, its already known between the two atp, so this can be set after that period), Aven wants to love reader, wants to hold them close, and wants their affection, but dammit, he just cant bring himself to. Not when he's sure he'll just hurt everyone that comes close to him (his sister, cough cough)

and reader has the same mindset, they love Aven, as a boss, as that annoying but endearing friend, and perhaps as more. But they have blood, the lives of people that they've unlawfully taken, not to mention, they are 100% sure Aven would never love a person who killed just for monetary income.

now, here's where the real show starts. There's also another assassin (seriously, Duke Inferno should save his manpower) following reader and Aven. Safe to say, only one is making it out alive. How the assassin followed the two of them? No fucking clue, but somehow it does.

After i assume beating the living shit out of hordes of memory zone monsters, the assassin appears, and just when Aventurine's unsuspecting?? Boom, goes in for the kill.

Yeah, too bad. Aven's not dying. But reader is! Yeah, in a act of (cliche) protection, reader allowed themselves to be the one to suffer from the attack. (Bonus if they get decapitated, or just stabbed like how Trailblazer was by Cocolia). Aven will never forget the way that he just- watched reader's body fall, the light just gone from their eyes.

Anyways, he doesn't even get to hold their body. You just- poof into bubbles like Firefly did. The last thing he has left of his beloved bodyguard? Just a simple red earring, matching the one he wore. Nothing left.

Okay, im also going to cope here that the whole shitshow with Aven and Acheron did not happen, he returns to the room that reader had, and he just... stands there. He takes in the way that half of the room was messy, half of it was untouched. So much like them, unpredictable and just had a touch of the weirdness he loved so damn much.

(Bonus if you want a happy scenario, reader's alive and well, afterall, dying in the dreamscape doesn't kill anyone. Reader is probably smiling very awkwardly while they stare at a teary eyed Aventurine, then they make out /hj)

yay another rant, i had this idea for days, the decapitation part may or may not have been plaguing me (should i be concerned), anyways, thanks for listening to my word vomit, stay safe and stay healthy <33

feel like falling on my knees and begging to forgive me for taking so long this spring doesn't let me breath istg. I've got this request before 2.1 and only got to it now that's why Aven is ghosting me.

bodyguard!reader "dying" in the dreamscape to protect Aventurine

sort of a sequel to this but can be read as a separate work as well, the main thing you need to know is that reader was originally an assassin sent by Duke Inferno but they've changed their mind and stayed by Aven's side

notes - gn!reader, angst, unestablished relationship, no beta

You both knew the trip to Penacony would be difficult. You, in particular, knew that something big and very sinister is coming, judging by the way Aventurine danced around the subject, not giving you full information.

You may not know all the details of Aventurine's plan but you know him well enough to realize that he's planning on doing something extremely reckless and dangerous.

So you do your best to protect him. To shiels him from any possible danger, to keep him within your reach.

Of course Aventirune notices. How can he not notice when he already keeps his eye on you most of the time anyway. And just as you're trying to look out for him, he wants to looks out for you.

This mission already could be considered suicidal and he doesn't want you to be caught in this. Better to keep you in the dark, away from it.

Yet he can't help but selfishly enjoy your attention, your tenderness. You go out of your ways to make sure he's fine and he feels so undeserving of it. How can you be so kind when he's keeping so much from you?

You've seen him at his worst and you've stayed. You've proven so many times that you care for him not because it's just your job, not because of his money or status but because it's him.

He still struggles to believe in it sometimes. When he feels doubtful , he rubs his cheek against your shoulder in a playful cat-like manner and watches your reaction. Amusement you're trying to hide. Adoration you can't hide.

How can he doubt you? You're the one who should be doubting him.

He wants to melt into you, to be even closer than the two of you already are, but how can he love you without putting you in danger? Without draining your luck, without cursing you?

Sometimes he sees the same struggles in your eyes. When you carefully trace his face with the tips of your gloved fingers, your gaze sometimes lowers and you pull your hand away, as if you're ashamed.

But of what, of what? The blood on your hands? He has it too!

He wants to tell you this, to hold you tight, to never ever let go. The wish is so primal that everyone else can see. The memokeeper giving him a knowing smile as soon as she sees you two together, the masked fool taunting him about the only one willing to listen to him being his loyal dog ("though, judging by the way you look at them, little peacock, you're the one on the leash here~" she says. It feels like even a lower blow than the comments about his past. At least he expected those, but being taunted about his obvious feelings for is new), mx. Stellaron asking you two to get a room with a deadpun expression.

The worst one is the doctor though. Asking Aventurine to focus on the mission, then, in a softer tone, suggesting to tell you more about the plan. "It's foolish to keep it from your most trusted person, gambler. In the end, it may hurt them even more than your obsessive concerns".

If Ratio of all people gives you relationship advice you're doing soooo bad.

Yet Aventurine can't bring himself to listen to his words. He wants you safe and well, and he's sure (he's not sure) he's doing the right thing.

And yet he's wrong. He can't shield you, he can't. One of the richest people in the IPC, one of the Ten Stonehearts, the blessed one, yet he can't protect the one he loves no matter how much he tries. He's cursed, doomed, isn't he?

Damned Duke Inferno. He's dead, annihilated, and yet, somehow, one of his wretched dogs, his sneaky little assassin, finds you two in the depths of the memory zone. Such dedication to the cause!

There are two gunshots. Inferno's little rat and you strike at the same time. Them, aiming at Aventurine, and you, aiming at them. Only one bullet reaches it's target though.

It all happens so fast. You react immediately, covering Aventurine with your body. You move instinctively at the same second you shoot.

When their bullet hits you, you don't even feel it. Maybe because it's still a dreamland? The pain just won't come even though your back feels like it's on fire. You don't understand it yet but your body already starts disappearing.

All you can focus on is Aventurine's wide shocked eyes. His beautiful, beautiful eyes.

You smile weakly at him. That's all he can see before you're gone. He doesn't even have time to reach out to you, to hold you. As if he ever had the privilege of holding his loved ones in their final moments.

You just poof into the blue bubbles.

He rushes into the real world, in your room, praying to any deity that may here for you to be alive and well. It was a dream, not a real world. You can't die in a dream, not really. You weren't even killed by the memory zone meme, surely you're fine!

Yet you're not. You're not here, not anywhere in the hotel. You're truly gone.

He feels everything and nothing at the same time.

Of course, of course, of course he wasn't able to protect you!

How lucky he is, he has avoided death once again! His beloved died to protect him but he has survived! He's so blessed, truly, so blessed!

He finds himself on his knees, on the verge of hysterical laughter. The only thing you left behind is a small red earring he has gifted. And he clatches it so tightly his hand bleeds. Perhaps the pain is the only thing keeping him sane at this moment.

It feels like a cruel joke. It doesn't feel real, it shouldn't be real.

Wait... That's it! It isn't real. It's impossible to die in a dream! It was his theory all along, after all. It must be true. You just can't be dead, you can't, not you too.

His plan hasn't changed, he tells Ratio when he comes to check on Aventurine. He just needs to reach the real Penacony. To reach it and to find you there. You're strong and brave and so wonderful. You're out there somewhere, he just needs to help you to get back to the real world.

He holds into that idea like a madman. It doesn't matter how dangerous it is. It never did, to be honest. But now it's like he can't focus on anything else.

He hasn't feel so despaired in years. He just needs to find you, everything else is meaningless.

So when it's time for the final act, he gets on stage, fears not and doesn't look back.

He still holds his hand behind his back though. Clutching your earrings for dear life.

[hero-israel]

Looks like the Pro Palestine movement shat the bed completely. There's definitely been a vibe shift ever since they turned on Black people. The DNC protests were a bust. And Palestinians tried to raise a big stink over not getting a speaking spot at the DNC and the vast majority of people were like, "Lol you called the nominee 'Killer Kamala' and her boss 'Genocide Joe', what did you expect?" Now "Muslim Women for Harris" gave her their endorsement because they've finally realized they have no leveraging power over the Democrats and decided maybe they should do something to prevent Trump from returning to office.

Free Palestine isn't attracting the same large crowds anymore. The college protests are a few dozen people. Not to say these lingering ones aren't dangerous (they're probably even more dangerous than the bigger crowds at the encampments last semester) but they're just not attracting the same energy they used to.

It's going to be very interesting to see how the leftists who went full Jew-hater and jumped on the Free Palestine bandwagon react to the engine running out of gas. Do they think they can just go back to trying to cancel each other over microaggressions after spewing Nazi shit for the past 10 months? Do they think they can quietly delete their 10/7 tweets and people are just going to forget? I want to know if it's sunk in for them that they have completely destroyed credibility in mainstream leftism. Because I know I'm never trusting any activist movement again unless they can prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that they're normal about Jews.

I know there will be no apologies, no self-reflection, no accountability from these people. I expect nothing but a bunch of gaslighting. People who pretended they didn't pass around lists of "Zionists", pretending they didn't romanticize self-immolation, pretending they weren't regurgitating slurs from David Duke. No, they'll all pretend they were totally calling out the antisemitism this whole time, for real. They totally weren't an active member in an Arab/white supremacist death cult.

Going forward, it's like how whenever you meet someone with a certain vibe, you ask them who they voted for in 2016/2020? Whenever I meet someone who's a self-proclaimed "activist", it's gonna like, "What were you posting about on 10/7?"

Oh I loovvvveee it. They came crawling right back. This should only be a lesson to the campus crowd about how politics works past the rhyming chant stage, maybe a few will even learn it.

[rockrosethistle]

A list of Nightmare Time episode ideas that I thought of and I think would be cool:

1.) Mr. Chasity has been trying to sell the old Waylon Place for far too long. After trying and failing over and over, he decides to take matters into his own hands by going in himself to see what all the fuss is about. But nothing could have prepared him to meet the real ghosts of Waylon Hall. And boy oh boy do they have shenanigans in store. (The episode would be called 'Unholy Ghost') .

2.) It's been a few months since Hatchetfield was destroyed in that awful 'accident'. Emma and Paul have been living under the aliases Kelly and Ben Bridges. (there can be a joke where Emma doesn't even pretend to care about her alias and Paul cares too much.) They live in Colorado now. Emma's finally started her pot farm, and Paul is working in marketing. For the most part, they have a good life. Only Paul's acting a bit different lately. Emma caught him humming company jingles, tapping his foot to a beat she can't hear. Maybe those spores he inhaled had some effect on him. It's probably nothing, but he's never sung in the shower before...(I don't have a name for this one yet.) .

3.) Max Jägerman is failing remedial algebra. In fact, he's doing so poorly that his dad shells out and hires him a tutor, PJ. (Bryce's nerd from 'Literal Monster.) He reluctantly lets her help him. At first it seems to work and his grades are rising steadily, but as PJ lets her guard down, Max starts to notice some things. Strange symbols scribbled in the margins of her notebook, almost like...jagged smiles? Weird stains on her hands, when she gets too close she smells like roadkill. And there's this white spider that keeps showing up in his room. Sometimes he feels like it's trying to tell him something. Or warn him. Without knowing what he's gotten himself into, Max has to evade getting his soul swallowed by a hungry god of darkness. (The episode is called 'Dirty Dude Soup') .

4.) Charlotte Sweetly is jealous. Her church friend, Carol Davidson, has exactly the kind of life she wants. Charlotte's seen the way her boss talks about his wife, and would give anything for Sam to feel that way about her. One day, Charlotte finally gathers her courage and asks her how she does it. Carol takes pity on her, and decides to reveal an important secret: it's all the product of a ritual, an ancient spell she stumbled upon on a trip to an amusement park. She claims that ever since she did it, her husband can't get enough of her. "I am all he sees. He calls me the apple of his eye." Charlotte doesn't believe her at first, but Carol gave her the instructions, and why the hell not? She tries it. Unfortunately, Charlotte messes up the wording. The spell still works, but not quite as intended. And an all-seeing police officer could be a good thing, but Sam is not a good police officer. (maybe let's call this one 'Omnipocop'. But that's awful to spell so suggestions are welcome) .

5.) While trying to be an assistant, Steph accidentally botches one of Pete's science projects. He forgives her, but she still feels bad even as he assures her it's no big deal, throwing the mix of chemicals out his window just to prove it. What he doesn't know is that the last family that lived in the Spankoffski house buried their dog in the backyard, and Pete's chemical slurry just brought it back to life. On a probably unrelated note, Paul has been trying to ignore the damage he's finding in his apartment. He's been chalking most of the tipped over garbage cans and torn apart cushion up to rats--giant rats?--or maybe a squirrel. But when a decades-old "missing dog" poster shows up on his doorstep, he can't ignore the truth for any longer. (the episode would be called "Patches' Revenge" and I thing it would work because it's just the right amount of weird. It would end with Paul teaming up with the nerds to defeat undead Patches with science.) .

6.) To his utter delight, Miss Holloway finally agreed to go out with Duke on a proper date. Nothing huge, just some ice cream and a walk on the beach. They're both enjoying themselves when Miss Holloway hears something. Duke can't hear it, but he still follows her down the shore to some kind of cave grotto, where she claims the noise is coming from. She tosses a pebble into the water, testing how it might react. A few moments later, the pebble come flying out again. Duke is stunned, but Miss Holloway tosses her ice cream cone. Sure enough, a few moments later is comes flying back, perfectly dry. They've clearly discovered something, and over the next few days, Duke and Miss Holloway experiment and try to learn about the grotto and the water in it. It's too deep to see the bottom, so their tests mostly involve tossing different things to see how they'll react. Little do they know, there was a reason Miss Holloway could hear a noise coming from the cave. There's a reason it drew her in, too. There's something singing to her, something that lives at the bottom of the grotto. And with each thing they feed it, it becomes a little bit stronger...(and then it's called something unassuming like "Wavecrest Cave")

So that's Nightmare Time season four all lined up. Please tell me if you have a good name idea for episodes 2 and 4. Also if anyone wants to use these as writing prompts, be my guest (just tag me so I can read them)

[wriothesleybear]

Some more headcanons about Wrio:

● He's a hopeless romantic. He wants it all: wife, kids, house, but because of his job he doesn't believe he will have them which leads to believe that he is doomed in that department.

● He's not picky about who he's dating/ what you look like but if you're good w kids, he considers this a plus.

● He 100% believes everyone is scared of him which leads him to be somewhat reluctant to go talk to you but he will muster the courage to nevertheless. Expect him to stutter a bit (and he will be blushing A LOT).

● During the courting period, he will go ALL the way. He wants to impress you but he doesn't know what you like and dislike so expect extravagant dates. He's a Duke after all.

● If you tell him you don't like all the expensive stuff, expect more lowkey dates from now on.

● When he realized he's actually in love in you...oh boy. He's a complete mess. He doesn't know how to act anymore. Will fall in 💞 with you so hard that it feels like a tsunami just randomly crashed into him. NO, it feels like Cupid just dropped an atomic bomb on him instead of firing an arrow. He never felt like this before. Seeing how weird their boss is acting, his boys will ask him if he's okay XD.

● When he finally says the three magic words, his face will be a complete red tomato.

Some NSFW hcs 🤭:

○ He usually gets very horny at night.

○ His mind is sooo filled with you. It's driving him insane. Will masturbate while imagining you sitting on his desk naked with your legs open.

○ His "ice cream" is very long and thick with a beautiful rosy tip and veins all over. He's proud of it.

○ He has two mode in bed: one where he acts as your gentle lover and the other one where he acts like the most vile horny person you've ever met...as if a wild wolf possesses him. He becomes a horny whore with his tongue leaking 😏.

○ He plays it safe. He wears a condom but if you tell him to ditch it, he'll do it in a heartbeat.

○ LOVES raw sex but he loves anal sex more.

○ Has a lot of fetishes.

○ He DEFINITELY has a pregnancy kink. He wants to stuff your pretty pussy like a stuffy bunny.

○ He can go multiple rounds. That man has the stamina of a beast.

○ Will f*ck you anywhere and everywhere: in the bedroom, in the bathroom, in a public bathroom, at a restaurant, in a closet, on his desk, in the bushes, at your parent's house...you name it.

○ At the end of your sessions, he always gives you a tender kiss on the lips.

-girlie anon

AHHHHH GIRLIE ANON YOU'RE SPOILING US !!🥹🥰❤️i love these ! they're so cute and wholesome but also spicy and hot 🔥😉😈

i'd let him raw dog it every night. i'm also not much for having kids but for wolf daddy, i don't mind👀 i am yours wrio my love🥺

i completely agree with the idea that he can get embarrassed and blushy. ugh i love me some 'big, scary looking but is actually really sweet and kind' characters.

i feel so fed. thank you girlie anon! ily and i hope you have a wonderful day/night🥹🥰❤️

[phi8]

Recently rewatched Gravity Falls with its resurgence online, and I was itching to give my take on an older Mabel with an absolute unit of a Waddles (who is a regular farm pig after all). To go along with this, I also wrote some fanfic: a letter from Dipper to Mabel, about his return to Gravity Falls years after the show. Read it on AO3 or below!

Dear Mabel,

I hope everything is going well back home!  I miss you already, but it’s so good to be back in Gravity Falls too. A  lot has changed since our summer here.

The first week of my internship at McGucket Labs has been amazing. McGucket has really transformed Northwest Manor into a fantastic campus (though he still insists everyone call it “the Hootenanny Hut”)! There are so many  brilliant scientists and engineers here, and most of them have a refreshingly open mind about the nature and use of all the weirdness you can find in Gravity Falls. My experience with all that stuff is already paying off big time. Yesterday some PHD dude asked for my opinion on practical applications of necromancy (I told him it was a bad idea)!

Candy says hi by the way! It’s funny, for me this internship is all the way across the country, but for her it’s practically in her back yard, even though we both got that scholarship. Also, she tells me Grenda is more or less officially part of the Austrian aristocracy at this point? Apparently she and that Marius duke guy got engaged, did you hear about that?? Turns out I’m completely out of the loop with your friend group.

Candy and I have been hanging out with, of all people, Pacifica and Gideon. Can you believe it? Pacifica works at Corduroy Lumber these days. Probably in some misguided sense to get back to her roots, but I think it’s doing her some actual good. Working with her hands has been teaching her valuable life lessons I guess. It makes it a bit weird if Wendy also comes hang out, because she’s technically Pacifica’s boss – but you know Wendy’s cool about that.

Gideon is still running the Tent of Telepathy, so, not all winners. But he’s turned into a more lovable kind of swindler I think, like a younger Stan. He’s honestly kinda funny now (except that he’s taller than me). Wendy also told me he has a thing for Pacifica, and once she did, I couldn’t unsee it. He’s all over her! Pacifica hasn’t noticed, even though they spend a lot of time together. Or maybe she just hasn’t deigned it with a reaction... Either way, both of them are a ball to go for a drink with, whoda thunk.

You also have a lot of hugs from Soos, Melody and the baby (Stan Jr is sooo cute). (Yes, I asked. Melody promised to make you godmother of the hypothetical next child. You owe me.) The Shack is as charmingly ramshackle as it was back when we were here, but Soos finally got the old man stink out. I’m staying in Grunkle Ford’s old secret office because our room was converted to baby chamber. I still haven’t gotten the Bill murals completely off the walls and I have no natural light down here, but I spend most of my time at Northwest Manor the Hootenanny Hut anyway.

Or in the woods! Being back here really was a good move for my Youtube channel, there’s so much more supernatural stuff here than in California, and people are loving it. (I saw you liked my last video, thanks!) I’m currently tracking down what I think is the actual Gobblewonker. I analyzed some detritus samples from the lake, and there were feces from a large reptile present. From what we know, none of the dinosaurs in the mine were aquatic, so my current hypothesis is that it’s an unrelated creature. Especially since, according to my research, the Gobblewonker story dates back at least a century. I also gotta show Ford some of my findings. You know they’ve come across some aquatic monsters in the Bermuda Triangle. (Have you also been getting his mails with scans of the fourth journal? Truly fascinating stuff.) Either way, I’ll keep you posted, and you’ll be able to watch the result online.

Give my love to mom and dad, and Waddles a tummy rub! Awkward sibling sign off, Dipper

PS. Along with the photo’s in the envelope is that stuff you wanted. Be safe with it! There’s a reason it’s illegal in the parts of the forest controlled by the gnomes. But also have fun, I have it on very good authority it’s the good stuff.