#biana vacker brain rot

[permanently-stressed]

I like to think Biana curls up in the corner of her room sometimes. Just taking up as little space as possible and staying invisible as a coping mechanism. that's all

[doodle-do-wop]

KOTLC AND PJO

@valentinerose529 passed on the brain rot so now I'm dragging y'all down with me

Please buckle up your non-existent seatbelts and keep all hands, wings, feet, tails, and horns inside the vehicle. This is gonna be a long post

So

As I've previously stated else where I firmly stick my foot in the hill that the Aphrodite Cabin (10) has so much more under the surface of pink and glitter (not that there's anything wrong with pink and glitter)

Aphrodite is quite literally the Goddess of Love if you're a PJO fan and don't know Greek mythology or you're a fan but completely forgot.

She has an ever changing form to each individual as well as an ever changing personality (in the PJO universe) due to beauty standards and the culture of the place she's in.

Love is complicated and messy, it's not the same for everyone or every situation.

Thus why I put Keefe in good old 10. What a better place for an empath than the Aphrodite Cabin?

Now moving onto the ever messy Vackers

I love Fitz and Biana. I do............but I got an entire skeleton of bones to pick with Alden Vacker and of he can meet me outside the Denny's parking lot please-

While not actually smart Alden did manage to become emissary in KOTLC and Athena seems to like mildly smart guys who end up being very mid dad's. Girls got a type and I can only say hopes and prayers she gets better.

Athena is a strategist and occasionally thinks only in the form of a game (I will be using chess). Athena knows when it's time to get sharp and wet the blade and move people to where they have to go. She may be immortal but time is still against her so chop chop guys, we've got a magical meguiffin to snatch and bring back.

Athena is the goddess of wisdom, war strategy, handicraft.

What better godly parent to leave an ever lasting shadow on the eldest son Alvar. And the bitterness that stems from being out shined by perfect child Fitz who developed a far more impressive power than his older brother.

"but Biana feels so Aphrodite coded!" You cry and I hear you but Biana is a fighter at heart. She likes winning Quest Hunt and tackling the shit out of people in Tackle Bramble (she would love rugby). She's competitive and clever though it's not clear where on earth that gene came from, clearly not Alden.

And let's not forget it was Biana's idea to turn shirt ruffles into weapon hiding spots. Girls got strategy and style. Athena would be proud.

(plus the absolute sandal that would be blowing up the Camp's gossip train of Biana potentially being Aphrodite's daughter dispite having two Athena brothers would be scalding hot)

Onto everyone's favorite technopath

"oh Hephaestus, we all know" well you're wrong bucko

Worm, germs, plotted plant I named Timmy. What has Dex Dizznee built so far? Bombs, multiple bracelets for punching, many devices used just to heck the government's most top secret files, a panic button/tracker, more devices that hack into the government's files, a circuit that shall not be discussed.

These are all pretty crazy cool shit and Hephaestus would be damn proud to have Dex as his son.

But Dex isn't his son.

Dex's dad is the father of thieves, travelers, and roads. Hermes

"WHAT?" Yeah I know I know. But think about it. Dex is smart, he's so damn smart but he's tricky too. He knows the chemicals needed to dye an imp pink with glittery nails to match, he can whip up a batch up balding blam to get revenge, he can also be easily lost in the background of things.

So what a major disappointment it must be, to be waiting any day now for the sign of the hammer in a blazing forge and get a stupid winged sandal instead.

The Song Twins

Tam and Linh really gave me a run for my money because they're twins but Linh is an obvious Poseidon kid while Tam isn't and however powerful and weird the gods may be, two gods can't have kids with the same woman at the same time. It just ain't possible.

Linh's water powers are important to her character but so are Tam's. But Tam can still have spooky powers just not in the same flavor. Linh is the pretty side of Poseidon's rule over the seas. The water that heals and the funny animal shapes she makes. But the deeper into the ocean you get the darker it becomes. Tam's powers are the less pleasant things in life.

Now for everyone's second favorite arsonist (not Sophie)

Marella Redek has Pyrokenisis and you're saying "oh this one's eazy, Leo, come pick up your sibling" but you're wrong yet again my friend.

While Marella would probably be super frustrated with getting the tinker cabin over something that could help her mom (y'all remember how helping her mom was her main motivation?) at least with the STEM geeks she could hammer out some kind of magic mood ring to help her mom or make a bracelet with charmed gemstones capable of alerting her mom or herself when danger is near or just something

But no

Instead Marella is stuck in the only cabin that couldn't have been a worst match up for her. Hecate. (I know I previously said Ares but I changed my mind)

Marella, instead of having a knack for magic like almost every other child of Hecate instead got the flaming torch part of the deal. Literally. Marella can also see strings of magic and she doesn't like it one bit.

And finally Sophie (because this is getting too long)

Sophie was a tricky one since she has all these powers and it was nearly impossible to put her in a cabin that really fit with her

What finally got me to decide was actually her teleporting powers and inflicting. They have a sort of lightning and thunder styled description so who better than lord thunderbutt himself, Zeus.

[permanently-stressed]

Biana being a charming little genius is important to me but her being an awkward little bean is also important to me

[permanently-stressed]

@myfairkatiecat i just want you to know that the line "lately i don't feel replaceable, i feel erasable" is stuck in my head and has been for a WEEK i blame you for the fact that I can't properly concentrate on anything but the fact that IT'S SO GOOD AND SO FULL OF MEANING AND AJANDMSMDMSJDJSH